#the flowers are super cute but smell like piss

[handageddon]

Can some tumblr witches who live somewhere where yellow toadflax is good luck come and scour my garden for all the toadflax so I don't have to spend the rest of five years fighting this shit?

It's bad luck here because it outcompetes my cherry tomatillos and even though idk if they're edible (adjacent heavy landscaping) they are still extremely cute and I love them and I hate toadflax

[demonsword586]

Gehenna pp headcanons! (Just nobles)

(A little warning. This gets explicit. I was trying to make it goofy but I think I might have gone a bit....off. Still I hope you enjoy it. Mind you,I never saw a pp before,only an imaginary one of my friend and they still didn't let me poke it.)

Sitri

- Okay let's start off with the size...just from what I seen of him,I think he's on the bigger side. Definetlly bigger than Satan and his king is still pissed about that from time to time.

- 20-21 cm I think

-Now he is a gentleman. He was raised in hell called Hades. Which means he was probably taught of proper higene. In other words,this man's lower region is as smooth as a baby.

-Smells like tea. He drank so much tea,his piss now smells good and his cum tastes like black tea.

-Now for the shape and color. I think his tip is on a brighter side of pink. It's suprisingly slim and elegant compared to someone like Satan who's penis looks like a meat claymore.

-Anyway good penis on a good man. Refreshing as well if you need a man with flavoured cum.

Zagan

- Hmm....Now for Zagan,I think he's a grower.

-His bulge is pretty small but if we think on how much he exercises,there's no way he isn't training his penis as well.

-Okay hear me out. He has a little workout routine for his pp. He flexes up his muscles and makes it go up and down,probably does a helicopter to warm it up.

-And it actually works! His pp has grown in lenght and girth from his training and now he can make it hard on command.

-He does smell a bit funny though. He works out and while yes,you can hide the scent of sweat on most of your body,this is one part where he can'r mask the scent because it is simply too strong.

-My point? His pp smells...of manliness!

-He tries to take care of his pubes but would prefer to keep a small white bush above the shaft. You can't get him to shave it off tho. The bush stays.

-Also I think most of his cock is the color of his skin except his tip which is just one shade lighter.

-His seed tastes like protein tho.

Paimon

- Tucks it. I can't explain why but he tucks it. This bulge? Those are his balls.

-The actual size of it is around 13 cm. A little small for a devil but still packs a punch.

-He wears very cute underwear. He knows no one will see it but it just feels nice to know he has something cute on. Wears comfier undies when he's home and done for the day.

-Likes to put glitter on it. He just thought it would be a funny little thing if he putted some of that super fine and sticky glitter on the shaft....and now he puts on a little fasion show for the other nobles every once in awhile.

-It's actually good tho. He uses those little brushes and stencils. He once even did it for Leraye who then ran around pantless to show everyone how talented Paimon is at dick decoration.

-Sometimes when he thinks he doesn't smell good,he might put some parfume on it. Don't be suprised when his pp smells like flowers or vanilla.

-Very well groomed. No hair on the balls or around the penis. The only thing that he does have...is a little heart shaped bush slightly above his pp.

-The penis itself is on a little more girthy side and when hard it leans slightly to the right. Pretty pale with a pale pink tip.

Leraye

- flat

- Anyway Leraye I think is also a grower. It may not look impressive flaccid wirh only 12 cm but when it gets HARD..oh boy. It goes from a puppy to a wolf. This thing is easily 21 cm once you wake it up.

- The shape is on a leaner side. Being slender but also long. He does hower go thicker around the base. But only at the base,like a slight knot.

- He once walked in on Zagan when he was warming up his pp with the helicopter move and then very euthusiasticlly asked Zagan to teach him.

-Next time you two were about to have a passionate night he wanted to show you a trick. Wipes it out and then swings his pp around like a disco ball while saying 'Look what I can do!😃' It ended up being a little joke between the two of you.

-Suprisingly doesn't have a headless teddy anywhere near his cock. If you ask him,maybe just our of curiousity,why he doesn't have a teddy there like on his horn he will look at you with dread. That would be just rude of him to dirty the dead body of a plushie by impaling it on his pp. He can't bring himself to go as low as Glasyal.

- He does have a bit of pubic hair. A small, dishaved,blond bush . Very pretty and suits him. Please let him keep it.

-His cock is as milky as him. A very pretty color with a flush tip.

Belial

- Normal. Questionably normal lenght. It's not too big and not too small. Just...normal. maybe falls a cm or two from perfect.

-It's also on a little skinnier side. Nice and thin.

-Still size isn't everything. It's important how he uses it....and unfortunatelly for you,he's good!

-He manages to fill in for the lack of impressivness with his experience.

-He is quite strong so with him you're able to try some more adventurous positions like the bicycle or the ballet dancer.

-Gets easily moist. His precum is very watery so his tip looks like it's always glistening.

-Very well groomed. Almost no hair down there except for a thin strip. Also the carpet maches the drapes,his pubes have red ends.

- He also has 2 frenum piercings. Astaroth recommended him to get them,saying " You will corrupt many mortals with these. "

-The dick itself is pretty pale with a darker shade of pink at the tip.

Astaroth

- OH HOLY MARY

- *cough* Sorry *cough* thighs...

-Anyway! Let's go from the size down....BIG. The snake on his bory isn't the only snake he has.

- 26 cm

- You know how snakes hide their pps in what looks like a slit? Yea Astaroth can do that.

-Normally he keeps it inside of himself,but when he gets shy or horny,it pops out and his pants suddenly look a little heavier. There was a time when Sitri didn't know about his anathomy and just saw him suddenly get a bulge. He asked him if he just shat himself.

- Once out and hard,his cock naturally curves upwards. It's just slightly thicker than a normal one but with how long it is,that may be for the best.

- He has a dydoe piercing on the head of it. He considered going for more but decided not to after how intense it felt. He does always wonder how it would feel like if his piercings got stuck inside of you. How romantic~ Two lovers tied together as one for eternity~ (Thankfully it never happens. He is nice enough to take them off if you don't like the feel of them)

- He likes to keep himself well groomed. I mean very well groomed. He waxes off everything and then puts extra virgin olive oil on top. He also puts some on his shaft from time to time to make it a bit more smooth and squishy.

[flowerinjuries]

Heyoo, can you do yuta as bf just like the one you did for Mark?

yuta as a boyfriend <3

the soft side:

oh this guy was crushing on you so hard before you two started actually dating

to him it was like love at first sight

did not hesitate to be a flirt

i’m sure he asked you out in a cheesy romantic way with flowers and a huge grin on his face

at the start of the relationship he’s just really giggly and soft

holds doors open for you

he likes to take candid pics of you because you’re just so cute

he just wants to remember the small moments spent with you

he definitely shows you off

loves seeing you wear something sexy and acting confident when you two go out

such a laid back boyfriend

he knows you’re his so he doesn’t really get jealous besides you both know no one can fuck you better than yuta

anyways you definitely love bragging about him to your friends

they all agree he’s so good to you and makes you so happy

yuta is lowkey a romantic

loves doing traditional things like holding your hand and paying for you

he’s also like your personal chauffeur

loves to go on long destination-less drives with you

especially at sundown and nighttime

you know his hand is gripping your thigh as you sit in his passenger seat

this man glances over at you 24/7 just to soak in and memorize your beauty

like i said he’s really laid back

you two will have dates where you just sit on the couch listening to a new album or watching a scary movie so he can hold you when you’re scared even though he also is scared

he gets so excited when you ask him personal questions or show interest in him

he just adores your attention and loves spending time with you

has all sorts of nicknames for you like baby, angel, sweetheart, dolly.. the list goes on

he’s so fragile with you and your feelings

wipes your tears away and coddles you

he always has your back and is never afraid to stand up for you

he’s your personal hype man so he’s always cheering you on and always takes your side

loves to smother you with his hugs

you act like you’re annoyed or you can’t breathe but in reality being this close to him gives you an excuse to really take in his warmth and his amazing scent

idk why but i just know this man smells so fucking good ok

that’s why you never sleep on your own side of the bed

you just have to be as close to yuta as possible

he doesn’t mind though, he always welcomes you with open arms

he’s so cute when he’s all sleepy

random thought but i think yuta definitely wears a necklace with your name or initial on it

needs the whole world to know you’re his

and he’s just so confident too

especially since you two started dating

you definitely gave him an ego boost

i could go on and on but i feel like this is getting too long…

overall yuta is the sweetest most perfect boyfriend who you just get along with so well

all he does is uplift you and push you to do your best and be proud of who you are

yeah he’s perfect

the not-so-soft side (nsfw/18+):

a fucking sex god

the definition of brat tamer

no you’re never gonna dom this man

maybe he’ll let you, but it won’t last long

he’s super freaky and super down to try anything you want to

first and foremost he prioritizes your safety and comfort

don’t forget your safe word

ok yuta has a lot of kinks

did i mention he’s a brat tamer?

don’t you dare piss him off

piss him off anyway though because then you’ll have the best sex of your life lol

he’s sadistic and loves angry sex

i said he’s not jealous, but when he’s fucking you he is sooooo possessive

“scream my name again, yeah? remind everyone who fucking owns you”

“you think he could ever fuck you as good as me? huh? do you? what a good fucking joke, y/n. let’s see who will be laughing when i fuck you so hard you can’t even make a noise other than the sound of my name leaving your dry, fucked-out throat”

yeahhhhhhh

he probably fingers you with his cold silver rings still on

he likes when you tug on his hair, but he likes it more when he’s pinning your wrists down

likes it when you really can’t move :(

so that’s why he’s super into bondage

has cute pink rope he ties around your skin so tight it bruises

gags you with your own panties

after he has a taste of course

yuta gets what he wants first

loves to fuck you with his tongue

you ride his face while your hands are tied either behind your back or handcuffed to the bed

ok that’s enough

he wants to fuck your throat

“god stop fucking crying over this. how’s it gonna be once i finally fuck your sopping wet hole? what are you gonna do then? such a fucking cry baby. you can barely take what i’m giving you now, so why should i give you more?”

smacks your ass until it’s red

grips the back of your neck and forces your face into the mattress so he hears your muffled screams

just imagine him fucking into you at a really hard and fast pace as the cold necklace with your name on it hits his chest back and forth

if only you could see it though ;)

he grunts really loudly

he has such a filthy mouth

he just gets angry when his baby is bratty

someone has to put you in your place

warns you to never make him angry again after he cums all over you

you give him a look with your wet puppy eyes that promise that you’ll be good

but you both know you’re gonna act up again

yuta is the king of aftercare

cleans you up with warm towels and runs you a bubble bath

washes your hair and body for you as your body goes limp in the tub

kisses your cheeks

maybe gives you a massage too

dresses you in your pjs

combs your hair and sings you to sleep softly as you two face each other

yuta is perfect

crying

thanks for reading! as always, asks are open! don’t hesitate to send me any thoughts you have :)

[void-botanist]

OC Pokemon teams tag: AOM

I'm taking an open tag from @kk7-rbs for this one! I chose these for the main AOM players based on vibes and also story potential.

Also an open tag!

Sid

He doesn't really favor any type, and that shows in his team. He evolved the Sirfetch'd from a Farfetch'd that fought him for an onion, the Goodra from a Goomy he found in the garden (his parents did NOT want him to take it inside), and the Alcremie from a Milcery he caught with the smell of his baking (it's probably a different variant than the one shown but he let it pick out its candy). The Mimikyu showed up when he was cleaning out the attic, and he feels like they have a lot in common actually. Donovan gave him a Galarian Yamask and fully believed it could never be evolved, but Sid figured out how to evolve it anyway. Emma gave him the Froslass when she got a shiny Froslass, and he had to retrain it to be less slappy and bitey.

Donovan

He loves ground and rock types more than anything but those alone are kind of a weak team, so he's diversified. He's a big fan of Pokemon that are Shaped, hence the Shelgon and Gastrodon. Unfortunately he has never met someone who was fooled by the Sudowoodo. The Mudsdale is his hard hitter, the Trevenant is his favorite, and the Sableye he picked up from a cave because it reminded him of Sid (then a small child). Through no fault of its own it got most of Donovan's care and affection (RIP Sid) and is kind of a spoiled brat.

Emma

Her team organizing principle is cuntiness. She picked Sobble as a starter years ago so she could end up with Inteleon. Pheromosa, Tsareena, and Froslass were all pretty easy choices too. She thinks the Machamp is cute and it has a great attitude (smash all opponents). It actually has not given her the most injuries - the Rapidash has, between its pointy horn and its tendency to get into her head with its psychic abilities. She doesn't super discourage this kind of behavior because any Pokemon that can knock her down can doubly do it to her challengers.

Avis

She favors ghost types (she used to have a Trevenant in her main team but she switched it out when she found out Donovan had one). She loves Rillaboom the most, though, because she's had it the longest - she raised it from a Grookey. Her default strategy is to use its size (it's 6' 11") to intimidate most challengers (including Sorian), and then switch to Dhelmise when it gets a little low on health. Anyone who knows their types will assume she has a grass-based team, at which point she can pull out Kommo-o or Grappleoct to surprise them. Gengar and Dragapult also unnerve people, which is fine by her. She hates it when people point it out but she's very kind to her Pokemon and is far more worried about how good of a trainer she is to them than how powerful they are as fighters (pretty powerful).

Sorian

He loves fairy and psychic types and they love him. Obviously the Ninjask is an exception, but he keeps it in his team just in case and because Horatio gave it to him (he still doesn't understand why Horatio thinks it's like him, but okay. It's cute). He often lets the Comfey stay out of its Pokeball and wears it as a flower crown, which Avis finds infuriating (how dare he have a cute Pokemon like that. fucking asshole). People think Avis will be irrationally pissed off by the Hatterene, since it looks kind of like a human woman, but it just looks like that - why would she be mad? Sorian's favorite Pokemon is actually the Togekiss, which likes to snuggle with him when he's alone but retreats as soon as Avis shows up. His most powerful Pokemon in battle are definitely the Claydol and Musharna.

Horatio

Horatio didn't start out trying to bridge as many types as possible, nor to have only dual-type Pokemon, but once he realized it was happening anyway he leaned into it. He started with the Galvantula, which used to ride in his pocket when it was a Joltik, and ended up with Vileplume when his Oddish would not stop accompanying him out of his florist shop. Edith gave him the Swinub he evolved into Piloswine, and Sorian gave him the Deino he evolved into Hydregion because it looked like him (it did). The Aegislash came from a Honedge that tried and failed to blend in with his gardening tools, and the Gallade - which he suspects used to belong to someone else - he found wandering in the woods when he was studying river plants. It has very little self control around people who are rude to him, and it sometimes gets switched out of his team temporarily when it's being moody.

[sensei-venus]

Ok but what about big scary mean Dutch falling for the cute studious girl. She's technically a "nerd" or "geek" but she doesn't look it. She's just super soft and sweet and has a little pout to her lips. It all started because he had to sit next to her in their English class and he couldn't help noticing the way she bit her lip when concentrating or the crease she gets between her eyebrows when she's reading. She's all soft sweaters and books in her arms and he's muscle tees and karate. She's soft spoken and articulate and he's loud mouthed and act first-think later.

(This is super short but still, unedited.)

Dutch hated english class with a passion, not just because he hated school work but also because the teacher was a buzz kill. The old basterd even moved his seat at the beginning of the year because he was talking to much to Johnny. After he got moved he was pissed, this class was a bore to begin with but now with no one to mess with in class it was ten times worse.

Things changed when he started to notice the people around him in his new seat. Actually he only notice one person, the girl who sat next to him.

She wasn’t his type, at least compared to the girls he had previously dated during the last few years in highschool. She was different in every way. She didn’t reek of cheap perfume or dress high and mighty like his past flings. She didn’t even roll in the same crowed as those girls. She usually sat alone during lunch doing her homework or reading books she got from the school’s library.

She smelled like real flowers, like the once’s outside the county club when Johnny and Bobby would let him sneak in with them to use the county club pool during the summer months. She only had the slightest undertone scent of old books from the library on her sweater’s. The scent would linger and travel his way every time the window of the classroom was left open on hot days. It was intoxicating in a weird way. He didn’t say anything, he didn’t even talk to her for months besides when he got caught cheating off one of her English tests.

“You could just ask to copy off my sheet, I don’t mind….”

Her voice was soft, so soft that it made his stomach flutter for a moment. He couldn’t even say anything back, he just nodded back as he continued to copy off her test. That was really the beginning of his whole silent obsession. But it was only silent for so long because of Johnny’s big mouth. His big mouth had to say something to the other guys after seeing Dutch basically play footsies with her in the aisleway between the desk’s. Bobby had encountered him to actually say something to her while Johnny and Tommy ragged on him about it.

When he finally asked her out, it was the best day ever.

He never regretted the days he spent cuddling with her while she read books. He secretly loves listening to her read out loud to him. The days spent outside in the park listening to her read to him while under the shade of trees where just different. It was peaceful.

[yandere-writer-momo]

Heart Shaped Wound

Chapter 27

Author’s note: I’m so excited to write about Jack again.

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    (Your name) couldn’t remember the last time she slept so well. Hanayama’s bed was soft like a cloud and he was the perfect temperature to lay next to all night. Not to mention how much he kissed her all over her face, neck, and shoulders all throughout the night. She felt pampered like a princess the entirety of the night.

     “Good morning.” Hanayama greeted her as servants came in with breakfast. “I’m a bit disappointed that our time together is coming to an end but I do hope to do this again.”

     “Maybe at my place next time.” (Your name) joked, Hanayama cracking a smirk.

     “I wouldn’t want to intrude on your roommate.” Hanayama stated as he rose up from the bed, (your name) blushing at his exposed chest. She had to admit that Hanayama had a really attractive body. Even with all the scars, he was magnificent. “Plus at my place, you don’t have to worry about being interrupted if you want to go further.”

      (Your name) blushed, turning her head away when Hanayama turned the front of his body to face hers. The man smirking at her reaction.

      “Do you enjoy what you see?”

      “Please stop trying to kill me. I’m dying over here.”

       Hanayama chuckled as he put back in his robe with a smile. 

      “Let’s have breakfast together before I take you home. I want you to eat to your hearts content since we won’t see each other for a few days.” Hanayama hummed to himself. “I’ll also send you off with one of my shirts. That way you don’t look too out of place when you walk to your house.”

.

.

.

       Zaria’s eyes lit up when she saw (your name) walk through the front door wearing Hanayama’s signature purple dress shirt.

       “Did you two finally f-“

      “No. We had a pretty comfortable time together actually.” (Your name) smiled as she thought about last night, a dainty blush staining her cheeks. “He was super gentle and he really took every aspect of my life into consideration…”

     Zaria put her hands up to her chest in shock. Looks like scar daddy moved up on the husband material list. He must’ve been a fantastic smooth talker to impress (your name). Zaria knew her best friend was easily swayed with anything she wanted to hear… but it did raise a few red flags in Zaria’s mind that he knew exactly what she was looking for in a man… and Zaria highly doubted he was a mind reader. 

     Zaria would give him the benefit of the doubt this time, lest she wanted to face the wrath of a broken hearted yakuza. Hanayama was on Zaria’s number one spot not to piss off. And then Jack. Zaria felt like Katsumi would be the hardest to upset out of all of the suitors.

      “I have to get around for my date with Jack now.” (Your name) held up a white blouse and tan wide leg dress pants up. “Do you think this is cute?”

    “I mean, you look good in just about everything.” Zaria put a finger up to her lip in thought. “Do a messy hair look with it. I think it’ll look nice.”

      “Messy hair?”

      “Trust me. Men always hit on me more when I’m less put together. Something about that natural state makes them wild.” Zaria extended her hand like it was a paw, a playful growl eliciting form her throat. (Your name) snickered. “Go jump on your wild man.”

      “You’re horrible.” (Your name) rolled her eyes at Zaria’s antics. “I’m not jumping on anyone.”

     “Yet.” Zaria winked.

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.

.

       (Your name) stood in front of the wisteria tunnel. Her eyes sparkling at the gorgeous purple and white flowers. This place was so gorgeous, she couldn’t believe Jack would recommend such a place. They smelled sweet yet slightly musky… it was suiting for them to make her think of Jack and his outdoorsy scent. 

     “Good morning, (your name).” Jack’s deep voice greeted (your name), snapping her from her musings.

      (Your name) turned her head around to see Jack approaching her. The giant man wearing an oversized white sweatshirt with a black swirl design all over it and long black pants. She didn’t think he’d be so stylish but then again, she didn’t think a lot of clothes fitted him. Who was she to question such minuscule clothing logic.

       “You look beautiful as always.” Jack complimented her. The two getting stares from passersby. Albeit Jack and her probably looked like a strange match up due to their incredible size difference. Not to mention the amount of scars he had that made him intimidating to others.

      “Always the charmer.” (Your name) teased, holding up her hand for him to take. Jack wrapping his large hand around hers with a smirk. 

      “Only to you.” The two began to walk down the tunnel together. (Your name) sighing at how peaceful it was. She really enjoyed spending time with Jack. He never pressured her to do anything and he didn’t cling to her. Jack never tried convincing her to choose him over the others. He was her solace. There was jsut something about the giant man that made her feel so at peace and she loved it. It was why he had the number one spot.

       “What are you thinking about?” Jack asked, rubbing her hand with his fingers. “Me?”

     “I was in fact.” (Your name) smiled up at Jack. “I enjoy spending time with you.”

      Jack felt his cheeks heat up. The blonde turning his gaze to the ground. His heart drumming in his chest at her words. She was so kind to him… was it selfish of him to want her to only want him? 

     Jack sneaked a glance at (your name), her eyes sparkling in awe at how beautiful the wisterias were. It was a shame she wasn’t aware that Jack thought she was the most beautiful thing here. Jack could stare at her forever if she allowed him.

      “Thanks for bringing me here, Jack.” (Your name) squeezed his hand. “I always feel so at peace with you. Like nothing would ever happen to me. Like I’m safe.”

     Jack felt his throat dry up. His empty fist clenching a bit in thought. Did she mean it when she felt safe with him? Did that mean the others didn’t make her feel safe?

      “Jack?” Jack turned his attention back to (your name), who held a concerned look on her face. “Are you alright?”

      “I’ve just been thinking about a lot of things…” Jack took in a deep breath before continuing, “would you be interested in my life?”

     “Your life?” (Your name) tilted her head at Jack who nodded.

     “I’m not very exciting. I couldn’t offer you a cushy life or a stable one. My entire life revolves around getting stronger so I can defeat my father.” Jack unloaded on (your name), his eyes making sure she wasn’t uncomfortable with his trauma dumping. “The most I could give you is a cabin in the woods… far from everyone and everything. I don’t care much for people.”

     (Your name) smiled at Jack. He seemed to be the most lucid with his feelings but she could tell he was holding back for her sake.

     “I don’t care about what you can offer me.” (Your name)‘s thumb started circling Jack’s hand in calming circles. “People should never go into a relationship if they want to know what the other can offer them… that’s not what a relationship is.”

     Jack turned his entire body to face (your name), the man hanging on her every words as she began to share more with him.

      “Relationships should start with two people who like each other. If their goals are different then they’ll have to find a way to comprise with each other or end things right away. Opposites attract but that’s only to a point. I’ve always lived the life of a nomad so I wouldn’t mind being far away from other people. I’d just like to see my best friend and my mom every once and awhile. They’re the only two people I have in my life.” (Your name) smiled at Jack. “Don’t you have anyone you care about?”

     “My mother as well. I call her from time to time.” Jack replied before deciding to share about his brother. “I talk to Baki here and there as well. He’s my younger half brother.”

     “I met him awhile ago.” (Your name) smiled at Jack, she wanted to be transparent with him. He’s the only one who didn’t seem like he’d have a cow about her seeing other people. “He was pretty nice. A little strange but nice.”

     “Strange?” Jack furrowed his brows. Baki wasn’t planning on using (your name) as a rebound for Kozue right? He’d fight him if he even tried.

      “Yes. Like he was dropped on his head as a kid.”

      Jack couldn’t stop the loud laugh that escaped his throat. He didn’t care about everyone giving him weird looks, he couldn’t believe (your name) said that.

     “He probably was.” Jack snicked, his eyes sparkling in amusement. 

      “I’ll see him tomorrow. I’m so excited to finally have a little brother.” (Your name) shared with a smile. Her mother didn’t want to have any other children after her and it made (your name) upset when she was a kid but she understands why. Kids are a lot. 

      “If Baki ever makes you uncomfortable, let me know.” Jack stated, his expression now serious. “You may see him as a little brother but don’t ever forget he’s a man.”

      (Your name) beamed at Jack. “Don’t worry. I don’t like younger men. Plus he’s your brother. I don’t really want to keep it in the family.”

     Jack smiled at her. He knew she didn’t, but that didn’t mean Baki didn’t like her. Jack wasn’t sure if he should step in yet. It’s not like (your name) and him were official. They didn’t have a title yet but Baki in the equation did upset him a little. Baki was not the type to show interest in just about any girl. 

       “I’ll fight him if he tries anything. I won’t let a baby try to take you from me.” A sweet giggle escaped her throat, Jack blushing a bit. Her laugh sounded like twinkling bells.

      “You’re so sweet.” (Your name) smiled at Jack. “I’m such a lucky girl.”

      Jack believed himself to be the lucky one. A beautiful woman was giving someone like him the time of day.

     “I’m the lucky one.” Jack whispered. “I have no idea what you see in me.”

     “You make me laugh. That’s important to any girl.”

.

.

.

       Jack walked her back to her place. He was impressed with his self control today. The more he hung around (your name), the more in control he felt with his mood swings. Was it strange to believe she tamed him in a way?

     “Can I kiss you before you leave?” (Your name) asked, her cheeks a bit rosy. She didn’t want to outright tell Jack she liked kissing him. It would probably go right to his head.

      “Why? Do you like kissing me or something?�� Jack teased, his eyes widening at how her face became redder. She thought he was a good kisser? He’s never heard of that before. Jack was extremely flattered.

       Jack bent down until he was her height, his hand making its way to the back of her head. Jack lightly pulled the back of her hair so her head was titled up to look at him. And only him.

      “I love kissing you too.” Jack bent down, pressing his lips firmly to hers. (Your name) doing her absolute best not to melt into the kiss. It was embarrassing to admit but she swore she felt electricity run through her.

      Zaria opened the door, her mouth hanging open at the sight before her. Holy shit. They were getting it on.

      Zaria slowly ducked herself back into the door frame. The young woman pulling out her phone to record. The flash was on but Zaria didn’t care. She couldn’t wait to tease (your name) about it later.

._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._.

Author’s note: thanks for reading. I’ve received an influx for Pickle to be added so he will be the one joining the mix instead of the two I had planned on adding. Also! Kureha is finally coming into the equation next chapter. Thanks again for all the support.

[youras-wonderland]

A Bunch Of Flowers For You | Byun Baekhyun

• Baekhyun x Female Reader

• Fluff

• Author: youras-wonderland

A/N: A cutie Baekhyun for you. I hope you will like it! Enjoy! 💕

While it was cute sometimes that your boyfriend was a crying baby, it was getting on your nerves right now. He hasn't spoken to you for about three hours. He was probably waiting for you to hug him and apologize. Even though he was super stubborn, he wasn't going to be the winner this time.

Cleanliness was your weak spot and he knew it very well. Despite this, the entire kitchen and living room looked awful. Whereas you just went to meet your friends.

His irresponsible behavior made you angry. He did this all the time, and now you're out of patience. However, you politely told him to clean the house, but he ignored you and continued playing.

To piss him off, you unplugged the computer and made him lose the game he was about to win.

Gaming was his favorite thing, and he went crazy when he saw the computer shut down. He just gave you a quick glance and went to his room. It was obvious he was angry.

When you followed him to his room and asked him to help you clean, you got a big no.

'No, I will never help you! I lost the game because of you! Are you happy? Look at what you did for a stupid cleanup!'

'Stupid cleaning? The stupidest thing is the games you play! I'm tired of you being irresponsible, Baekhyun!'

Okay, maybe you shouldn't have yelled at him. That was a little too much. But his moodiness got on your nerves.

He hadn't left his room for three hours. You had already cleaned the house, cooked and rested.

For a moment you thought about going to his room and hugging him, but then you gave up.

Eating your meal alone was not something you were used to, and you felt bad for a moment.

I shouldn't have yelled at him. He was just tired.

The feeling of regret made you feel bad. You prepared a dinner plate for him and knocked on the door of his room. You went inside when there was no sound.

He was looking at you sullenly. You wanted to bite that sweet face but it seems that Baekhyun was still angry.

You left the plate on the table and left the room.

You quickly got dressed and went outside. You wanted to surprise your boyfriend. So you went to a nearby florist and bought a bunch of flowers for him. You smiled and smelled the flowers.

It was the first time you had done something like this for him and you were wondering about his reaction.

When you got home, you saw Baekhyun sitting at the table eating the other meals you made.

You slowly walked to him and held the flower in front of his face.

He looked at you in surprise.

'What's this? Why are you trying to put flowers in my mouth?'

'I bought a bunch of flowers for you. Sorry for yelling at you.'

He was smiling like it was the most beautiful thing in the world.

You hit his arm with the flower.

'I miss you! You haven't spoken to me for hours!'

'You deserved it for yelling at me, dear. I was expecting you to apologize.' He said and took the flower from your hand.

'You're such a crying baby, Baekhyun.'

He laughed with his sparkling eyes.

'It's you!'

'Okay, now give me a hug.'

He stood up and hugged you tightly.

'Thank you for the flower, my love.'

'You're welcome, but... You're not mad at me anymore, are you?'

'No, but I want a kiss!'

Smiling, you held his face and gave him a soft kiss.

'Love you, Baekhyunie.'

'Love you too, darling.'

[aloilustra]

My time to shine! Jsjsjjsjs

These are only about P2 Dude because I just love him so much. And haven't played the other games besides Postal 1

• Likes goth, postpunk, 80s and 90s music.

• LOVES the song Blue Monday

• His sunglasses are prescription

• He has a lingering smell of sweat and a bit of piss (eww)

• Has a bit of temperature disregulation, that's why he wears a trenchcoat in Arizona.

• He was super in love with the Bitch, but years of financial insecurity, toxic traits from both sides and routine, ended up hating each other.

• His position at RWS was of concept artist. His drawing style is rough, with hard lineart. Despite that, he does not consider himself an artist, just someone who has a monetizable skill. Therefore he does not make much art for himself, just work stuff.

• He also has some coding knowledge

• He takes meds, but they're barely working. Still, it keeps his homicidal thoughts at bay. Sadly, he has anger and impulsitivity issues that influence in his crimes.

• He does not find cats cute (tell me something idk). What's more, he finds that they are pests and full of parasites and fleas, even housecats.

• His smiley pin was gifted by the Bitch when they started dating. He keeps it out of habit, cuz even if he hates the bitch, he has no emotional attachment to her past gifts (like cards, plushies, flowers, mixtapes, etc), so there is no need to get rid of them. He also does not get affected by dedicated songs. While he recognizes the kind gesture, he does not get sad hearing the songs after a breakup.

Anyone please reblog this with ur postal dude hcs???? Especially if they arent ones that are commonly shared with others :0 other ones are fine too but I LOVEEE HEARING PEOPLES HCS ABOUT HIM

[arent-i-the-fairest]

Hello! if request stilll open, i read your fic of "heated competition" i was kinda wondering what the twst boys react when reader choose the twst boys' dorm and what would be like staying in their dorm too?

ps: its okay to reject this request if this is too much author-san.

𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 (𝟐)

author’s note : part 2 is finally here, yay~! ♡ this is probably my longest work yet. hope you enjoy, my dears!

part 1 here!

in front of you was a piece of paper— a piece of paper that had the names of all 7 dorms on it, arranged in random order.

“well, here goes nothing.” you placed your finger on a random name. “eeny, meeny, miny, moe, catch a tiger by it’s toe..”

grim watched in anticipation as your hand flicked between the dorms, sitting on the edge of his seat as the rhyme started coming to an end. you smiled as you let out that final “moe”.

“that settles it! we better go and tell our new dorm leader the news, hm?”

heartslabyul

riddle is over here acting like he expected this from the beginning when he and everyone else knows how much he didn’t. if anyone talks about how uneasy he actually was, it’ll be off with their head!

trey is really surprised— he was sure ace, deuce, and riddle’s overbearingness would have made you immediately eliminate heartslabyul as an option. he’s glad you made the choice you did though, the dorm will benefit from having another sensible person.

cater’s super excited!! new dorm mate! now come closer so he can snap a “welcome to heartslabyul” pic, he’s gotta remember this moment! he’ll send it to you later~!

ace is like riddle, except he did expect this from the beginning. while you were carrying some of your stuff to your new room, he decided to sneak attack you and threw himself on your back, making you drop all your bags— a great start to your time in the dorm.

deuce is in disbelief, you! chose!! heartslabyul! he was starting to have his doubts on if ace’s plan was really gonna work or not, but looks like it did! and him, being the great guy he is, helped you out a ton with moving in and setting your things up.

life in heartslabyul

POSITIVES : there’s never a boring day (a fancy way to say it’s always chaotic), almost always getting off the hook because turns out riddle has a serious case of favoritism towards you, getting to bake with trey, tending to all the cute animals, and of course, tea parties with everyone.

NEGATIVES : it’s hard to get some alone time, keeping up with dorm duties, ace always coming into your room uninvited, and having to do extra studying about the queen of hearts + her rules. all 810 of them.

savanaclaw

when you told leona, you were confused by his reaction— which was borderline maniacal sounding laughter. turns out he was just thinking about how hard he’s gonna make fun of vil and malleus for losing the competition.

ruggie let out a biiig sigh of relief when you told him. it was looking like you were favoring some of the other dorms over savanaclaw, you had him worried!

jack didn’t really know how to go about welcoming you. he ended up just gifted you a little cactus he grew. it’s super cute, it’s got pink flowers on it!

life in savanaclaw

POSITIVES : following jack on his daily runs, helping out ruggie with chores or whatever else he might need help with, hanging out with leona in his room, and being able to do just about whatever you want as long as it doesn’t cause trouble!

NEGATIVES : it’s overbearingly hot, lowkey smells like sweat 24/7, and most of the residents are hotheads. and very strong. which is a dangerous combo— so you have to be careful to not piss them off, and if you do, you gotta run. or you could take them on if you’re just built like that!

octavinelle

looks like azul��has a new employee! you’re thrown into action right away, he’s showing you all the ins and outs of working at mostro lounge— and bam, you’re in uniform serving people fancy drinks. welcome to octavinelle!

jade is very pleased, promising that you won’t regret your choice. which you may or may not. he’s just excited to see how long it takes until a catastrophe strikes.

it’s hard to shake off floyd after he found out you were joining his dorm. you’re just tryna do your job, serving orders, but floyd wants to get you to follow him around the dorm so he can show you all the neat things about it. eventually you cave in, let’s hope you’re back before azul notices!

life in octavinelle

POSITIVES : getting free food from mostro lounge, making cute terrariums with jade when you both have spare time, floyd making work hours feel shorter, and azul being a surprisingly decent boss.

NEGATIVES : working at mostro lounge is not optional, having to worry about shady people (just about everyone in octavinelle), the twins deciding to bother you for no reason, and having to deal with floyd’s NDE inducing squeezes 2x more frequently than normal.

scarabia

because of kalim, everyone in the school will find out about you choosing scarabia within like a day— he’s shouting about it from the rooftops. (lowkey rubbing it in everyone’s faces.)

jamil politely bows and lets you know that he’s glad you chose them. the reaction might’ve been a little underwhelming, but he’s very happy. he also really wishes kalim was in a different dorm so he could subtle brag about it to him.

life in scarabia

POSITIVES : this is by far the dorm with the friendliest residents, parties just about every day, jamil’s cooking, kalim helping you out financially, and being able to just relax with jamil in silence when you get exhausted by the parties.

NEGATIVES : like mentioned above, the parties can get exhausting, another dorm with overbearing heat, and the boys bring up their concerns about poisoned food and other dangers a lot, which obviously gets you a teensy bit paranoid.

pomefiore

hah, just like vil expected! now he knows for sure you’ve got a good head on your shoulders, choosing pomefiore. thank goodness you didn’t choose savanaclaw— he shudders at the thought of you in the middle of such an unruly place.

ever so dramatic, rook throws himself in your arms. with his hand on his forehead, he starts to ramble about how happy he is and doesn’t plan to stop anytime soon.

epel is super relieved; he thought he totally blew pomefiore’s chances. but that aside, he’s gonna go out of his way to help you with adjusting to pomefiore, all the new routines and lessons probably gonna be a bit to take in for you. despite you being someone vil is fond of, he knows the dorm leader won’t take it too much easier on you.

life in pomefiore

POSITIVES : seeing great improvements in your skin with each day thanks to vil’s products, bonding with epel over your shared pomefiore-related struggles, and becoming the person who probably knows the most about rook in the school.

NEGATIVES : having vil breathing down your neck nearly 24/7, a good bunch of your fellow residents are snooty, and rook stalking you. if you ever feel watched, just point in the opposite direction, yell something along the lines of “is that leona??” (or floyd, ruggie, anyone rook finds interesting will work really), and book it.

ignihyde

you sent idia the news over text, and when he read it, he screamed— like, the whole dorm heard it, probably thinks there’s a threat, and he’s gonna have to clarify there’s no danger + issue an apology to everyone kind-of-scream.

life in ignihyde

POSITIVES : you get as much alone time as you need with not a soul judging you, godly wifi, and you actually learn a lot about engineering, technology, and such!

NEGATIVES : you break something? you gotta pay up for it— and everything here is high tech and costs a fortune. and the other residents are pretty difficult to work/get along with, so you might have a little trouble making friends in your dorm. plus there’s a little too many of them that smell like axe body spray :’(

diasomnia

malleus smiles so wide, it’s so wholesome! and a little scary. but he starts dragging you around the dorm, no real idea where he’s going to take you, and not caring either— he’s just so overjoyed right now!

lilia is the one who informs you about the dorm! he tells you about the history of it, what the students are like, all that jazz. he decides to drop the boring talk after he sees how you disinterested you are though, deciding to go and show you what your first dorm duty is. it’ll be fun, he promises!

sebek is glad that you were finally able to see diasomnia is the best dorm! you get upgraded from a simple ‘human’ to ‘human with considerably great intelligence’, good on you!

poor silver was a bit late to the party, finding out about all this much later than everyone else did. when he finally found out, he gave you a gentle hug. a warm welcome.

life in diasomnia

POSITIVES : being proud of yourself every day knowing you saved the school from malleus’ wrath by choosing diasomnia, getting into mischief with lilia, messing with sebek, naps with silver, and having the pleasure of being packed with knowledge on gargoyles.

NEGATIVES : sebek is almost always yelling and you have yet to develop a tolerance to it, being surrounded by super magically gifted people is a teensy bit intimidating, and lilia’s cooking.

the good thing about all of the dorms? pretty men. mwah mwah byebye thanks for reading!! ♡(´ε｀ )

[magnificentpatrolstudent]

Sunday mornings with y/n 🌥🌸

aot x reader 

Eren

“Honestly y/n, they should’ve hired me,” Eren said as you applied the serum to his face. Eren lived for the feeling of your gentle touch on his skin. “Okay, reenact the end scene but like how you would’ve written it.” The two of you were doing your skincare routine together in the bathroom while talking about how bad the movie you watched last night was and basically rewriting the script. You giggle as Eren impersonates the actor and does different accents. You give his face one final pat “All done!” Next on the agenda was your yoga routine. Ever since forcing Eren to try it out with you, he always joins you. He says it calms him down but he only likes to do it with you. “Look at this new move I learned,” Eren says as he goes into a perfect headstand. “Woahhh! you say in sheer shock, lowkey pissed that he’s getting better than you 🙃.

Armin 

It’s 8 am and you and Armin are on your way to the farmer’s market, excited to buy fresh berries and bright flowers to place all over the house. As you walk to the market hand in hand, you share a pair of Bluetooth earphones, both listening to ELIO’s “When U Saw Love” as the morning breeze tickles your face. “We could visit the Botanic Gardens and go on the cable car!” Armin exclaimed. “Yeah, and we could go to the gallery and museum!” You two chatted about the trip to Singapore you’re planning for next summer and all the other places you want to see together. “We gotta figure out where we wanna go for our honeymoon,” Armin said in complete earnest. “We’re not even engaged,” you said, giggling as a fluttering sensation filled your stomach. “Not for long!” Armin declared. You literally stopped walking; you looked so stunned that Armin began to laugh.

Jean

“Say cheese y/n” Jean took the picture and feigned a heart attack after gushing about how cute the two of you looked. You and Jean woke up at 5 am to go for a hike to catch the sunrise, something you’ve been wanting to do together for a while. You packed the perfect breakfast picnic together which you guys practically inhaled after the tiresome 3-hour trek. At the crest of the small mountain, you two sat there for hours sitting and talking and taking cute pics together. “I’m gonna send this one to my mom,” Jean said with the brightest smile on his face. “No, take a better one 😠.” When you spot a couple in the distance with their 2 small kids, he says that’s gonna be you guys in a few years. He always says stuff like that and every time he does, your heart literally constricts; he’s literally gonna give you a heart attack omg. 

Connie 

“Hmmm…what should we make today?” You asked Connie while looking into the fridge. “I have no idea. How about we make whatever’s on the page I open in this cookbook?” Connie said while holding up the cookbook you were gifted last year and never got around to using. “Good idea!” “Super Creamy mushroom, Brie, and pancetta croissants,” he said, pronouncing pancetta in his best Italian accent. “That sounds amazing except we don’t have mushrooms, brie, pancetta, or croissants,” you laughed. “How about…coffee walnut banana bread?” Connie looked up at you questioningly. “Okay, I think we can actually make that!” you exclaimed.  “Alexa, play  “Carry Me Away” by John Mayer” Connie shouts at your smart speaker and you both get to work on your (hopefully) beautiful banana bread. While measuring out flour and cracking eggs, Connie tells you about how excited his family is to meet you soon, reassuring you that you have nothing to be nervous about. When the chorus comes on, he twirls you around and then you twirl him around and now you’re having an impromptu dance sesh. 

Levi

You wake up to a quick, soft kiss on the check from Levi. “Wash up and come to the living room, I made you coffee.” The living room smells faintly of the lavender candles you love mingled with the heavenly smell of freshly brewed coffee. You see Levi curled up on the couch sipping on the tiniest cup of tea. He pats on the space next to him, indicating for you to join him. You plop down right beside him, reaching for the mug he set down on the coffee table. His hand resting on your leg, the two of you talk about anything and everything--gossiping about coworkers, showing each other recipes you wanna try and make together, the books you’ve been reading, new music you’ve been into, and Levi raves about the new cleaning product he found the other day 💀. With the morning light filtering in from the windows and John Mayer’s “Say” playing softly in the background, you couldn’t think of a better way to spend your Sunday morning.

[onestepbackwards]

Ultimate au for u: Self aware beemas. I dont know how to also fit greaser au into it without changing beemas too much so some of the drones just get to wear leather jackets now

I don't know how to incorporate the self aware part... But greaser au and beemas au? 👀👀

Technically it could work. In the Greaser Au, Jes and I talked about the hideout being an abandoned train yard in town. That could easily be the hive instead of the tunnels. Imagine you save King Bee Emmet who was jumped by another hive or colony, and you are willing to risk your life with your parents by hauling this 7 ft bee hybrid to your home, and taking care of him. He sees you as his Angel, and now you have two King Bee Greasers trying to woo you, thinking you would make a perfect mate and Queen for the hive. Jes even brought up the idea of them making sure they always smell sweet, so you'd like their scent and choose them as mates 🥺🥺 The idea of these two Big Bad King Bee Greaser Hybrids wanting to smell sweet for you is just,,, really cute. And the hive has a big reputation for being tough and territorial, but all being super sweet and happy to see you? 🥺🥺 ...Plus the idea of them in lil leather jackets is just so cute, ngl. Jes and I were also talking how they would probably sneak you jars of honey, fruit, and things made from their hives wax as courting gifts. You have a room full of honey jars that Ingo and Emmet and the drones just,,, keep giving you. They are worried! You seem so stressed around your parents! So they happily give you things you can use, and eat. The drones would also probably sneak into your house to see you too whenever they get back from working, or are on their way to work. They also bring you gifts, like some pretty flowers they saw, some honey they had on them that totally wasn't intended for you in the first place. Any other hybrids in town recognize the bee's scent, and it becomes clear you are theirs, and under their protections. This can be a double edged sword. Some hybrids will steer clear, or even act extra kind to you, less they invoke the King's wrath. But if they have enemies... You could be a target, though certainly not an easy one. Pissing off a whole hive could destroy nearly every gang in the city. I dunno, It could work! ...Though I have no idea how to incorporate self aware into that, but thats okay. This alone is just fun to speculate ^-^

[amateurasterism]

dating camilo !

synopsis ; dating camilo madrigal headcanons

pairing ; camilo madrigal x gn!reader

notes ; first ever camilo post!! more in the drafts ;), 18+ dni

word count ; 0.93k

camilo’s favorite thing ever is to find gorgeous places on the outskirts of encanto and bring you there on picnics. he thinks you look amazing under the sunshine so you’re always outside.

he loves creeping up to you and tackling you in a hug from behind. never too aggressive though, because he’d never try to hurt you

when he’s anxious, he hides his face in the crook of your neck and traces shapes on the small of your back while whispering small sayings in your ear

he smells like sun, clay, and cinnamon

there’s always parties at casita, so he loves dancing with you during them. if you're into it, he likes preforming dramatic songs too

he LOVES it when you wear his rauna. he will go insane every. single. time. if you wear it in town where people can see, he loves it even more

camilo is always pulling harmless little pranks on you. he’ll hide your most current book, blow out your candles, and change the flowers in your vases every hour. if you wear glasses he’ll put them on his head and let you chase him around town for it

he is constantly shapeshifting into other people to trick you because he thinks it’s cute when you get mad at him for it

before dating- if you found someone else attractive, camilo would shapeshift into that person and do the things that he knows pisses you off so you wouldn’t like them anymore

he just always knows where you are. all the time.

camilo is definitely big on physical touch- it’s his love language.

cuddling is his favorite

when cuddling, he always tries to be the big spoon but it doesn’t work because somehow every time you wake up he’s the little spoon. it embarrasses him every time, but it’s cute

he loves when you give him kisses all over his face, especially when you try to kiss his freckles.

if you wear lipstick, he forgets that it makes a mark when you kiss him so in the morning he’ll leave his room covered in lipstick. all the madrigals find it hilarious when they point it out and he runs away screaming “STOPP” while covering his face with his rauna.

overprotective af

if he so much as sees another person glace at you, his arm will immediately tighten around your waist and he will send the worst of death glares at them. he’ll louden his voice when he calls you “mi vida” or “amor” just to make sure the message gets across

he sings silly songs all the time to make you laugh. recreating his verse in “we don’t talk about bruno” is routine

he literally melts every time you interact with babies/younger children. as encanto’s designated babysitter, he just finds it super cute.

he could watch you play with antonio for hours on end and never get tired.

camilo always makes sure julieta has cooked your favorite meal every time you come over

he likes to make you clothes, specifically skirts and dresses (if you wear them). when you show up wearing the clothing he made for you he’ll panic and start shapeshifting into random people because dios mio, you’re gorgeous

he looks at you every time he makes a funny joke or sarcastic comment to see if you laughed

the madrigal family loves you and all of them never pass up the opportunity to tease you guys

isabela and mirabel especially- they’ll catch you guys hanging out in the kitchen or outside and they’ll start making fun of camilo

“y/n, you know camilo used to kiss his pillow pretending it was you?”

“camilo won’t shup up about you, even in his sleep! ask dolores.”

dolores loves you, she’s just fed up with camilo talking about you all night and day

but she never turns you down when you ask her about what he says about you when you’re not there

its usually something about your smile or laugh or kind personality

pepa is obsessed with you and melts everytime she catches you and camilo goofing around

before you started dating, pepa scolded camilo for not making it official sooner

at family dinner, camilo will always make sure his family isn’t too overwhelming for you. if the madrigals start shouting over something, he’ll either pull you aside or hold your hand and rub your back under the table.

the madrigals go insane whenever you and camilo lean against eachother or call eachother nicknames. camilo tells them to stop, but when he knows it doesn’t make you uncomfortable he lets it happen because he thinks it’s cute when you go red with embarassment

you, pepa, felix, abuela, and mirabel are the first people camilo will shapeshift to when he’s surprised or panicked

because of his shape shifting ability, sometimes camilo will forget what he looks like, so he carries around a photo you took of him on your second date.

also because of camilo’s shape shifting ability, he sleeps and eats much more than normal. due to this, you have little stashes of food hidden around casita just incase he’s about to pass out.

he leans against the wall and smirks a lot when you’re around only because he knows you love it. he sees it in the way you turn red and smile uncontrollably

if he’s not with you, he’ll shapeshift into you so he can admire you in the mirror.

most of the time when he’s alone he’ll lay in bed and smile and ramble about you because he’s just that happy you’re his

[orpheusredux]

14, 19 and 58 from the nsfw asks list

Hi! Thanks for being our first response to this call out! Just a reminder, these questions and responses are STRICTLY 18+, do not ask or comment or even look if you are a minor. Anyway, I just got Eddie's reply so I'll pass it over to him:

Hi, officialsimp4eddie - ah, I don’t know how this chick convinced me to tell you all this stuff, but who am I to deny the pervy yearnings of the fans, huh? Also, sex is fucking great and beautiful and we should all get a fuck tonne more of it. Orgasms all round! 

Enjoy, you sexy little sickos. - Eddie

14: Do you prefer giving or receiving oral sex?

Ok, I’m gonna be real here: There’s something super awkward about getting a BJ. Like…It feels good, no denying, but also there’s a person’s mouth on your junk. They have teeth. They may choke a little. You don’t know what to do with your hands. You’re like, mentally screaming at yourself, “don’t fart, don’t fart, don’t you fucking fart”. Also, the last time you were looking down on your cock, you were pissing out of it, which is … you know. Ew. (No offense if that’s your bag, it’s just not mine.) So, anyway, where was I? Oh, right. It’s just, like, not altogether relaxing? Maybe that’s just me? I’d prefer a handy and some tongue, to be honest. Feeling her tits pressed against me, her lips all soft and slick from lip balm - gloss - whatever, and her hand wrapped tight around me. Yeah. 

Eating pussy, on the other hand? I gotta tell you, there is no finer meal. 

Every girl tastes different, looks different, moves different when you go down on her, right? You need to be alert to what she’s not saying. Some girls don’t like it - sometimes they feel vulnerable and weird about it because some idiot told them it smells, or it’s dirty or some shit. So, I don’t take it for granted that she wants my face all up in there, you know? But if she is into it, then I too am into it. So very, very into it.

I don’t want to get too goddamned poetical here, but they do look like a flower. They’re like, what’s the fucking plant… with the… the thing… you know. Orchids! Orchids. A pussy is like an orchid, made out of velvet, and that’s how you have to treat it when you get down there, like don’t dive in, it's not a chow bowl. And don’t for the love of fuck, go straight for her clit, she will not thank you for that. You have to easy your way in there, you know? Big, flat tongue licks, like a cat. Go in soft, till she’s bucking against your face. Then you go for her clit, man. Kiss that little nubbin. Make out with it. Fuck their bodies are so… holy shit. 

The real joy of it, though, the thing that really gets my dick hard, is that feeling when she’s letting you see her come undone, letting you see this part of her, kiss her in this fucking… sacred place, man. To like, enter her with your tongue.

Forget about it. I could do it all day. 

19: Would you prefer sex in the bath or sex in the shower?

I don’t know if you’ve seen my trailer, but like, there is no room for a fucking bath. Are you kidding? There’s barely enough room for the goddamned shower. We have a half-tub in there, for if you have kids, I guess. But I haven’t had a bath since I was like, 5. 

Also, just the logistics of that confounds me, you know? Like, are you getting bathwater all up in her? Are you sloshing it all over the floor? Who's cleaning that up afterwards? I don’t like the sound of it to be honest. 

I guess… OK, you can’t tell Steve this, but one time, in like, Junior year, his family went on holiday to fucking France or some shit. The guy would not shut up about it. “Oh no, I gotta got the France with my family… poor me,” honestly. Unbelievable.  

So, anyway, the Harringtons leave town, and a bunch of us break into their backyard and have a pool party. No shit. It was wild. I can’t remember who all was there, but one of the neighbors sticks their head over the fence and is like: “you kids keep it down over there. OK?” and Rick’s like, “Yes sir!”. No clue we weren’t Harrington's basketball buddies or something. 

You gotta swear never to tell, Steve. Jeeze, maybe I should tell him? What do you think? 

Anyway, this cousin of Rick’s was there from out of state. Amy, her name was. She was so cute, so hot. Really a great girl. And we hit it off. So when everyone had either passed out or fucked off, we ended up - you know - doing it in the pool, which is the closest I have ever been to fucking in the bath. 

I would never normally kiss and tell, but she was so psyched she got railed in a swimming pool she told anyone who would listen. Apparently, it was some kind of bucket list thing? 

Anyway, I won’t say much more except buoyancy is nothing to be sniffed at, if you know what I mean. Also, your jizz totally looks like a fucked up jellyfish in chlorinated water. Sorry, was that gross? That was gross. 

Jesus, please don’t tell Harrington. He’ll beat my ass. But it was before I knew him.

58: Booty or Boobs?

Oh man, this is a good question, I have never honestly thought about this… like, what do I look at first? 

Honestly, this is going to make me sound like I’m trying to be smooth, but I will totally notice a girl’s smile first. I know, I know, but it’s the truth, man. Look around, half the world has boobs, everyone has an ass. How many people really light up when they smile? It's a special gift.

But I guess, if you’re talking about when I’m being - intimate - which I know you are, you little degenerate, I’m more about the boobs.

Nipples man, I love ‘em. I love the feel of a nipple in my mouth, love feeling her squirm under me when I suck 'em, love nibbling on ‘em rolling them around between my teeth till she’s almost squealing. I love to suck on them so hard, it’s almost a hickey. Jesus. 

All tits are beautiful. I love tiny little puffy titties; I love a good handful; I adore some huge boobs, although I understand they’re not much fun for the girl carrying them around all day. Also, men are fucking animals and think big boobs mean a girl is easy. Honestly, it’s a wonder women will have anything to fucking do with us some times. 

But I do enjoy a big girl, I love those curves, you know? Am I… is it OK to say that? I like big boobs and I cannot lie. 

OK, that’s enough over sharing from me. Holy shit. I need to nut. Thanks for nothing.

____

WOW, OK, thanks for that, Eddie, that was... way more than I expected.

Check out the list of questions if you want to ask Eddie anything. And don't forget to check out my AO3 and my masterlists.

Also, I hate to ask, but would you consider reblogging? It really does help!

(CAVEAT: Y'all know this isn't really Eddie, right? Because he is a fictional character. This is a writing exercise. I have no connection or relationship to the Duffers or Stranger things. I'm just fooling around)

[levis-bathtub]

Some weird headcanons and vibe readings and stuff no one asked for

Lucifer:

Can't ride a bike. He says he just doesn't like riding them but he really just never learned

Can't grow a beard. Like at all.

Probably near sighted but chooses not to wear glasses or contacts

Strikes me as the type of person to just. Not go to the doctor? Like ever?

Mammon:

Colorblind

Pissed off a goose once and is now terrified of geese. Understandably.

Probably scared of horses too. They're too big. He doesn't like them.

Fucking sticks gum under the desk

Probably really likes animated movies

Really good at foosball (I think it's called table soccer in other places?)

I wanna see him wear a beanie. I think he'd look cute.

Leviathan:

Can't wink. He just kind of like blinks one eye at a time.

Looks like he can't swim. I know he's a sea monster but he just kind of has that vibe? Like the kid who cries whenever he walks too far into a pool and his feet lift off the bottom. That vibe.

Really likes those girly desserty scented lotions/hand sanitizers but is too embarrassed to ask for some so he'll just stare longingly until someone offers it to him

Satan:

Sneezes. Just. Into the open. Those big giant old man sneezes.

Writes post-it note reminders for himself, but they're super vague so he just has notes with shit like "Ask Beel about *illegible scribble*" and "Buy thing" all over his room

Because of his vague note taking skills he just does the whole "Well if I can't remember it, it must not be important" thing and just... never does anything about it. He can't even remember to take the post-it notes down.

"I don't work here but yeah I'll help you"

Asmodeus:

Collects things. From small things like candles and knickknacks, to whole ass clocks and lamps and shit

Can never figure out how much to tip so he just leaves how ever much he thinks they deserve (which is always way too much but who's complaining?)

"Hey, MC, share a locker with me 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰"

Locker is full of random decor and photos and those little white boards and has literally no room for MC's things

"Wait why are you moving back to your locker 😟"

You know why.

Beelzebub:

Type of guy to just never go to a barber. He cuts his own hair. Sometimes it's ugly but he does the whole "Well I can't see the back of my head so I don't care" thing. You should. It's a disaster.

Sunscreen who?

"Hey, can I borrow a pencil?" *chews the shit out of it*

Also the one guy in class who's pen always explodes. Like??? How does that keep happening? I've never had a pen explode on me before??? How does he do it???

Belphegor:

Unkempt eyebrows

Like. Really unkempt.

Not a headcanon or anything but he'd look super hot in glasses

Just fucking smacks things whenever they're not working as if that's helping at all

Would be really artsy if he wasn't so lazy. Same.

Diavolo:

Excessively polite to NPCs while playing video games

Just apologizing left and right and crying after hurting characters that don't even exist

(I'm projecting can you tell)

Really wants to try dyeing his hair but Barbatos keeps talking him out of it

Let the man experiment, Barbatos

Really good at bar games. Like poker and darts and billiards and stuff

I think he'd look hot with a 5 o'clock shadow but that might just be me

Barbatos:

Does the "I'm invested in this TV show but I refuse to acknowledge it so instead of sitting down I'll just stand next to the couch with my hands behind my back for an upsettingly long period of time" dad thing.

Really into trains

Gives off the vibe that he knows how to grill really well but is actually just kind of average at it.

I feel like he's really into rom-coms, but not the good ones. He just likes laughing at bad movies and thinks they're more entertaining than actually good movies.

I don't know anything about weed but I feel like Barbatos smokes weed. Probably with Solomon. Or maybe because of Solomon. Solomon can be stressful to deal with.

Solomon:

Gives me "Chaotic neutral dad chaperoning an elementary school field trip" vibe.

Probably has a lot of skills that he just... never uses? Like playing the saxophone? Knife throwing? Juggling? He's lived a long life and gets bored easily. He has a lot of time to learn a lot if things.

Just. Likes to set things on fire.

Likes the smell of gasoline.

Simeon:

I don't know if canon Simeon would be into drinking alcohol, but human AU Simeon would be super into fancy wines and champagne and stuff

Probably knows a lot about cheeses too? Both in canon and human AU.

Throws those really relaxing parties. Like Christmas parties, cocktail parties, movie nights.

Just really domestic and wholesome and relaxing to be around.

Really likes owls.

Luke:

Little kid cough

And chugging a bottle of water hella loud

As someone with ADHD, Luke has ADHD. I'm not sorry, I do make the rules.

I feel like he's really into antique stuff? Like old toys and stuffed animals and posters. Stuff that's cute and childish but with a hint of retro aesthetic.

Also into flowers. Like arranging bouquets and wreaths, flower language, stuff like that. He just likes pretty things, ok?

[jouta-salad]

SDC Sugar Daddy HCs (Afab!Fem reader)

(CW: a touch of manipulation/toxic relationships, a hint of yandere, implied smut, age gap, mentions of intoxication/alcohol, daddy kink)

Oldseph

Typical. Not surprised he went after a beautiful young woman like you, especially considering he had an affair with Tomako when he was in his 50-60’s

He would definitely be rough with you, but it’s to be expected

He’ll grope your breasts and smack your ass in semi-public places and laugh when you get flustered and shy

Will definitely show you off to his friends at parties

“This is my baby y/n.. isn’t she a beauty?” *old man chuckle*

Speaking of parties, he would pressure you into drinking and you always end up getting drunk bc of him

Buys you lots of small dresses and lacy lingerie.. he especially likes buying you cute little sundresses

All you have to say is “daddy I want ____.” and give him doe eyes and he’ll buy double of what you originally wanted

Makes you massage his scalp sometimes

Will literally spoil you rotten and get you whatever you ask for, even if it’s the weirdest shit(He’ll even buy you horse semen if you really wanted it)

Loves to tease and poke at you in general

Kakyoin

My boy would definitely be kind of yandere

He literally had no one for most of his life so he wants to make sure you won’t ever leave him especially bc he loves you sm

Will gaslight you if you get angry at him

Loves spoiling you and would def buy you super expensive perfumes and shampoos bc he loves it when you smell good

He also loves buying you expensive handbags and silk clothing too

ESPECIALLY LOVES IT WHEN YOU WEAR SILK so expect a lot of cute silk lingerie, dresses, and nightgowns from him

Loves taking you to fancy ass parties and make you hold onto the crook of his arm and follow him around place to place like an accessory or smt

Would buy you cocktails to sip on while he took you around so you don’t get too bored

Shows you off sometimes at the parties

“This is my darling, y/n.. isn’t she just the prettiest girl?”

Would do shit like that and embarrass you for fun sometimes bc he thinks you’re cute all flustered and shy

He would totally do the ‘grab your chin with his fingers and force eye contact’ thing and then kiss you OMFGG

Btw, hes definitely a sucker for seeing you in his coats and shirts and seeing how oversized it is compared to you

Avdol

This man is one of the nicest sugar daddies ever

He would totally buy lots and lots of accessories like necklaces and bracelets and earrings

And probably lots of loose or flowy clothes

Would buy you any pets you want

Like literally you can ask for 3 horses and a cat and he’s back with people working on building stables and shit

He would take you on once-in-a-lifetime trips around the world at the nicest hotels

Would braid your hair or just play with it a lot

Definitely hires artists to paint beautiful portraits of you

He also hires professional gardeners to plant your favorite flowers in the garden

Genuinely has a lot of wholesome love towards you, and would do anything to keep him by his side forever

He loves when you kiss the scar on his forehead. He finds it so endearing.

He always dreamed of having kids with a beautiful woman like you… would definitely pressure you really hard if you didnt want any

Jotaro

He’s super fucking mean. Or acts like it atleast.

Would buy you professionally tailored dresses and lingerie and demand you wear them whenever he felt like it

He’ll pretty much buy you anything you want (especially if you give him puppy eyes) as long as it isn’t anything too weird

“..Good grief, don’t look at me like that.” *purchases $1500 handbag*

He also won’t let you buy lots of pets like Avdol. His limit is a dog and a cat.

I have a feeling he would pretend to be annoyed when you asked, but would willingly buy you so many plushies???

Takes you along to his business parties and gives you his card to buy cocktails and shit while he goes off and socializes.

And if you ever get drunk at one he’s gonna be pissed af and might “punish” you later or literally punish you. It depends.

Will definitely make you light his cigars for him

When you do something well he’ll give you head pats and stroke your hair

Call him sir or mr kujo and he goes bizzerk

He secretly loves it when you sit on his lap, and he’ll hold your hips when you do

Loves it when you massage his back and shoulders,, especially while he’s doing his work

Polnareff

This man is the ultimate sugar daddy

He will literally buy you anything you want.

Oh you stared at a pair of shoes at the mall a second longer than usual? He’s off to purchase it

did I mention that he’s also the biggest flirt ever?

“Did I ever mention you just look absolutely beautiful today mademoiselle? Not that you don’t normally hehehe”

He says shit like that daily to the point it barely fazes you anymore lol

He buys you the most extravagant presents out of the blue

One time he randomly bought you a fancy horse-drawn carriage ride “just for fun” and bc “he knew you would love it”

Will buy you flowers almost everyday and so there’s just vases all over the house

A huge fan of pda and will have you hold onto him whether it means holding his arm or hand

Also gives the best hugs

One day he adopted a white and light ginger cat that you both named “brûlée”

He fucking loves sharing food with you for no reason

Maybe it reminds him of that one spaghetti kiss in ‘Lady and the Tramp’

Also be wary because he might get drunk with his friends on accident and you’ll have to take care of him until he knocks out

[derireo]

Bro what if,,, winter troupe cuddling/napping together headcanons😳??????

bro ,,, ur absolutely right . . . i'm getting Heated just thinkin bout it 😳 (accidentally let female reader insert slip in tasuku's,, i almost hc he fears women)

Winter Troupe Cuddle/Nap Headcanons:

Hisoka is already out like a light in either scenario, so there's not much to go on about. And He May Not Look Like It .... but he is big spoon. This ain't even a joke

How he cuddles depends on the environment. In bed, he's obviously going to cuddle from behind, arms curled tight around the waist with his chin either tucked atop the head or nose buried in the hair.

His legs go wild though, u never know what to expect. Either he wraps his legs around your hips like he's holding a large body pillow, or they're tangled with yours.

Napping on sofa? Flat out laid across the whole thing. He's dead to the world. He won't budge if you lay right on top of him, but an arm will definitely wrap around your shoulders to keep you there. The other members are pissed off tho.

They can sit on the floor.

Speaking of the floor, it's his favourite spot to lay down. He either curls up like a cat or lays in a position that looks like he's getting ready to be put in a casket. Either one is capable of startling the other members.

In his curled up position, he likes to hold hands. It doesn't have to be both, but he Has to Hold a Hand or a marshmallow bag – pls. It's not a comfortable position if you've ever laid down on the floor like that with no cushion, so the warmth of a hand is very comforting and will make him fall asleep like Babpy.

He doesn't talk much when cuddling or napping (duh, fucc . . .) but he does babble at times, depending on his dream.

He doesn't kiss either, but he is super affectionate anyways, if you consider him burying his face in your neck or hair counts. His hands don't wander though too! He is such a good kid!

Homare... Oh Homare...

He's a big spoon! But dis bitch don't even know what he doin!

Napping is like something that doesn't exist in his vocabulary so when he's suddenly asked if he could nap with you, at first he says No. Sorry,,, poems and all hahaha . . .

But he comes around not too long after. Writing poems is exhausting guys!!!

I think he likes cuddling face to face. It gives him inspiration cause he likes to stare at things that are pretty and breathtaking plus this position definitely gives his heart some ooey gooey goodness feelings.

Cuddling only happens in the bed. He doesn't understand how it works outside of it, Don't Push Him it's Improper...

His arms cradle you almost like a baby, with one arm wrapped around your back and the other supporting your neck, fingers gently brushing through the soft hair at the back of your head.

He lets you fall asleep first most of the time and uses part of his nap time to admire the features of your face, every so often brushing his fingers along the bridge of your nose or your brow bones. Words just pop in his head when he does this, and they're always used when describing you. They're included in his next poem.

Cuddling and napping has actually improved some of his writing to the point that even Tasuku is patient to listen sometimes.

Speaking of Tasuku; Talk about Big Big Beefy Spoon hahaha , .,, he is so handsome.... im whipped

He's one of those people that are like "women don't exist". I'm so close to calling him an incel, no experience with women whatsoever don't let the canon story tell u otherwise.

Surprisingly enough tho, he's awesome to cuddle with. Those big muscles he's always workin on can actually do something for once.

He doesn't nap a lot, only after an intense afternoon jog does he rest. But he needs to take a shower so that happens first.

So that means he smells good,, EXTREMELY good during cuddles... and his body is warm so it's even better.

He naps on his back, with his arms crossed underneath his head, ankles crossed over the other. It's such a relaxing position for him as it stretches the muscles in his arms and it releases the strain in his back.

You can easily swoop in and latch yourself onto his side. He won't do much to complain and will rather peek an eye open to see who it is. Once he knows it's you, an arm will escape from under his head and coil around your shoulders to pull you in much closer.

He gets flustered when you slip your hand under his shirt to rest on his abdomen, but he's so warm and ur widdle fingers are cold :(

He kisses the top of your head when you both wake up an hour or so later and affectionately rubs your squishy cheek with his thumb when you don't get up right away.

Cuddling outside of the bedroom is very limited, but when it happens,,, it is so intimate that it has even Sakyo eyeing you two,,, Pretty sure there were gagging noises at some point when you were casually sitting on his lap while eating lunch.

Tsumugi!!!!! Oh my Babey!!!!!

He is little spoon most of the time, but he Can and Will hold you when he is feeling confident about it.

He actually talks a lot while cuddling, mostly about his interests, his family, or childhood memories shared with Tasuku. But this is when he's big spoon.

He likes it face to face, but gets flustered easily so he prefers spooning most of the time. Whispering into your about something is always so fun because he can see your ears get red even though his are heating up too.

His arms are tight around your waist at first, but they eventually loosen as he gets sleepier and sleepier, until he falls asleep while talking about something his grandma taught him when he was younger.

When he's the small spoon though, he's knocked out like a light. He gets pretty tired considering he works late hours with tutoring and tending the flowers, so when he asks to be held, it's just so that he can get all the rest he needs to talk about his day with you the next morning.

Cuddling face to face is so embarrassing!!!! But he super duper likes it because he loves watching your eyelashes flutter or your smile get wider whenever he says something funny.

His fingers sometimes accidentally trail into questionable territory (like under ur shirt) because he's rubbing your back as you both talk and he flushes and apologises even if you don't notice.

He loves to give you back hugs outside of the bedroom, but doesn't let it escalate much!

Really, he is so soft. 100/10 would recommend.

And here comes: King of Cuddling. Azuma Yukishiro. He's the most versatile of the bunch, and almost always manages to make cuddling inappropriate with you because he loves how your body feels beneath his fingers.

He almost teases you the first time you ask to cuddle, but eventually says yes. But what's worse,,, he brings u to his room. . . so u don't know what's gonna happen

Again, he's versatile so he can be the big spoon, small spoon, or he can be big macho man and lay down with you like how Tasuku does.

His Job was Literally This so most of the time he waits for you to tell him about your day and nods along in interest and hums at the most appropriate times.

His eyes are very ... intense. They stare at you so sweetly that it leaves you speechless, and it causes Azuma to laugh.

"Such a cute bunny." He'd coo and brush some hair away from your face, tucking it behind your ear.

His hands would be awfully touchy, trailing down your arm or waist while the other would be playing with your hair or caressing your face. And if he felt like if, he'd slip his hand underneath your shirt and scratch his nails along your back, or even teasingly dip his fingers into your shorts before pinching your waist.

If you're finished talking, he'll gently ask if you're ready to nap now and will cradle your head to his chest, lips kissing your crown as he held you with his fingers buried in your hair.

The occasional nights where he has a nightmare, he almost silently asks you if you could hold him, and nearly melts in your arms when you do.

He quietly laughs wetly against your skin when you copy the actions he does to you, soothingly dragging your palm against his arm while your lips are pressed to the top of his head. He thanks you, genuinely, and responds by kissing your throat.

And then you both fall asleep to the sound of your breaths going along in tandem.

Cuddling outside of the bedroom is also quite rare for him, but when's feeling playful he'll somehow trick or coax you into sitting on his lap

Or sometimes when you're working on a puzzle or colouring book together and sitting on the floor, he'll slowly make his way to your side, shuffling ever so close

Eventually you succumb to the warmth that's at your side and rest against him, and he'll smile secretly and comb his fingers through your hair.