#the context slaps I very much recommend

[midosune]

Day 10-Falling Sleep Together

[translatingpostsintoitalian]

Sto studiando l'italiano per facendo flashcards con le parole qui che non ho capito -- il mio coinquilino mi aiuta ad usarli. Ha risultato in questo:

Coinquilino: Ah ... non credo che posso dirlo ...

Io: Finocchio?

Coinquilino: Sì ...

(Io sono bisessuale, lui non)

Sono morto 😭😭😭

Possiamo dare un F pass al tuo coinquilino

[dyaz-stories]

anywhere else is hollow || Cha Hyun-Su x Reader

word count: 1.4k

warnings & tags: mostly fluff, some angst because it's sweet home, sharing a bed.

first one-shot �� previous one-shot

A/N: Third entrance for @neohumanmonster's fandom event! The prompt was: Peaceful Pillowtalk. For context, reader and Hyun-Su were in high school together, reader was only there for a year before going to another high school, and therefore has no knowledge of the bullying which hyun-su was a victim of. this one-shot can be read independently (there's nothing intense plot-wise that requires having read the other parts), but I do recommend reading them for context.

Hyun-Su stays over at your place quite often now. Long gone are the days when he would drop by for no more than a couple of hours and flee the scene, as though he was scared that you spending time with him would make you despise him. Now he helps you out around the house, and, when he offers, the two of you go out on ‘dates’ around the city. It still makes you nervous, being out in the open, but Hyun-Su doesn’t hesitate anymore to take your hand in his and guide you through the empty streets.

When you’re both in your apartment, you can almost tell yourself you’re two college students living together. Almost. If it wasn’t for your blinds being always drawn to ensure no monsters could see you from outside, or your parents’ former room being turned into a laboratory by your dad before his disappearance, the illusion would be close to perfect. You do like the thought of it. Imagining you and Hyun-Su, sharing a place in a world where the Apocalypse hadn’t happened… It would be sweet.

That being said, despite your developing relationship, that you still haven’t put words on, Hyun-Su keeps sleeping on the sofa. You’d prepared a blanket and a pillow, ‘just in case’, in the very beginning, and that is where he still collapses every night. You’ve been waiting, hoping he would ask for another— arrangement, but he hasn’t said anything, and now you’re wondering if you should.

It isn’t always easy, being the one taking all the steps in the relationship. Makes you wonder if you’re pushing too much, too fast, makes you wonder how much he wants it. And yet, if he does want it but doesn’t dare to ask, how stupid would it be to lose that much time, when you never know how long you have?

“Um, Hyun-Su?” you say that night, as you’re about to leave for your room. He looks up at you with these beautiful dark eyes of his. “I was just thinking— you know you don’t have to sleep here, right?”

He blinks at you.

“Do you— are you asking me to leave?” he asks, and you immediately want to slap yourself. A few months ago, you think he’d have been half-way to the door already. Now, he sounds cautious and a little worried, but he doesn’t seem to have jumped to conclusions just yet.

“No,” you sigh, resisting the urge to bang your head against the door frame because, yeah, it makes sense he’d interpret it like that. “No, I just meant you could, uh—” you glance towards your room. “Just meant you have other options. Here. If you— if you want to.”

You don’t know why you’re so nervous all of sudden. You think a part of you cannot forget how beloved Hyun-Su was in high school, while you were— no one. If the world wasn’t ending, you don’t think he would have looked at you twice. So, sometimes, you wonder if he wants you the same way you want him. It doesn’t help that he doesn’t initiate much of your more intimate moments, and isn’t much of a talker in general.

Hyun-Su’s eyes slowly move to the open door to your room, then move back to you, going wide.

“Are you—” His voice cracks. “Are you sure?”

You nod, not really trusting yourself with words right now. You don’t want to sound desperate for affection, but you also don’t want, even for a second, to make it sound like it’s something you’re nonchalant about.

“Okay,” Hyun-Su mumbles. “Okay.”

He gets up from the couch, walks over to the door, where you’re still standing. You’re both quiet when you take his hand in yours and pull him towards the bed. It feels awkward, but you don’t have enough experience with this sort of thing to tell if that’s how it’s supposed to be.

For a while, you just stay laying on your back, staring at the ceiling, with Hyun-Su doing the same thing next to you. The atmosphere feels heavy, your whole body warm and tingling. This is all just so new to you. There have been lots of moments between the two of you, mostly spontaneous, just doing what felt right in the moment. This is different, probably because you asked, and you’re not sure what to do with it.

After a while, you roll over on your side, looking at Hyun-Su’s profile, until he turns his head to look at you. You press your lips together. Your mind is going into overdrive, trying to figure something to say — what do you even say in these circumstances? You’re drawing a blank. At least until Hyun-Su raises a hand and his fingers start slowly tracing your cheekbone, then your jaw.

You feel your breath catching in your throat, and your lips part as you do your best to keep yourself perfectly still. It’s like you’re finally being approached by a shy cat that you’re trying not to scare away.

Gently, he tucks a lock of hair behind your ear.

“Aren’t you afraid?” he asks, soft voice echoing in the dark.

Afraid of what? Of him? Of someone who touches you like you’re made of porcelain?

“No,” you answer.

For a while, there’s just the sound of the two of you breathing, and the feeling of his hand on your cheek.

“What if I hurt you?” he asks finally, voice weak and fragile.

“You wouldn’t.”

“You don’t know that.”

You swallow. You know he can feel it.

“Yes, I do,” you whisper, and you genuinely believe it to be true.

Hyun-Su’s hand stills. You hear him breathe out, before there’s the sound of rustling and then the feeling of his lips on yours. As usual with him, the kiss is brief and soft, a simple press of his lips against your own. What follows isn’t usual, though, the way he wraps his arms around you and pulls you against his chest, so he can put his chin on top of your head. It has your heart beating erratically, even if it’s not the first time he’s that close to you.

It’s just that that happens mostly when the two of you are kissing. The fact that he’s seeking that kind of closeness without that happening is a whole other kind of intimacy, one that almost makes you shiver.

“Is that okay too?” he checks. “You— said I didn’t need to ask, but…”

“It’s more than okay,” you answer, closing one arm around him however you can. “And I meant it when I said that.”

“I—” A sigh. “I don’t want to impose on you. Sometimes I— I feel like I need you too much.”

It becomes hard to breathe all of a sudden. Hyun-Su isn’t one for that kind of confession, not usually, but you desperately want to hear more. He keeps talking, and you feel his voice rumble through his chest and through you, while he plays with your hair distractedly.

“You’re so— independent. You look like you’re doing so well on your own, here. But it physically hurts to be away from you,” he mumbles into your hair. “But I— know what I am. I never want you to think you can’t— can’t push me away because you’re scared of that— that part of me.”

Your eyes sting, and you hold him a little tighter against you.

“I know who you are, too, Hyun-Su. And I don’t want to push you away.”

“Not now,” he admits. “But if one day—”

“Hyun-Su,” you call softly, trying to get his attention back on you instead of this distant, nebulous future. You live in a world where you may not know tomorrow, where a simple infection could be the end, not to mention the ever looming threat of monsterization taking you over. “I want you here. With me. I promise.”

Finally, you seem to be getting through to him. He relaxes into you, and his breathing turns deeper, more even.

“This feels nice,” he whispers after a while, and you smile against his skin.

“It does.”

You drift into sleep not long after that, you think, and for the first time in forever, you don’t wake throughout the night, startled by the smallest sound.

You just feel safe.

i hope you liked this one! i love developing reader and hyun-su's relationship through small steps, but just to let you know, we're getting closer to some smut taking place 👀 i hope people won't feel let down by that. i do think it would be out of character to write something super intense for them at that point so don't expect anything hardcore, but the 'porn with feelings' tag on ao3 is my shit so if you like that you might find something to enjoy in there! okay i think i'm done with this lil ramble.

Comments, whether here, in the tags or in a reblog, are greatly appreciated! interactions really motivate me and keep me writing :)

next part

[self-made-purgatories]

The Half-Empty Loveseat and Other Tragedies Or, the Episode Where Kirk Broke Spock's Heart (and Mine) Viewing Requiem for Methuselah in the context of "The Premise" (Spirk)

((Verrrrrrrrry long post, abandon all hope ye who enter here, etc., etc., but perhaps my thoughts will be interesting to someone else who is stewing in the juices of this episode as much as I am))

Spock is now a changed man from the beginning of this series. The stilted, warily friendly Vulcan from Where No Man Has Gone Before would not even recognize the Spock in Requiem for Methuselah: saying yes to a brandy, openly admitting an emotion (envy, for the host's art and history collection), and getting his heart(!) repeatedly shattered by his lover(!). Kirk's behavior towards Spock in this episode is exceptionally cruel when viewed through the Spirk shipping goggles, that is, accepting the Premise that the two of them are involved romantically and all of these events are happening within the frame of that situation.

There have been several rough episodes for Spock in Season 3, but it has always been because he was searching for Kirk, missing Kirk, or facing an enemy with Kirk at his side. This one really hurts because Spock's main antagonist is Kirk's own cruelty.

I view this episode through a very narrow tunnel in the shipping goggles, which helps to explain some of the more puzzling aspects of their interactions. Something has happened between Kirk and Spock. The two of them are definitely involved, Spock is deeply in love with Kirk, Kirk adores Spock but at the same time is pushing back and trying to keep things more casual with Spock (or he has in the back of his mind that he wants to settle down with a woman eventually and his gay flings are just for fun). It's an early prelude to the footnote drama: Spock's concept of t'hy'la contrasted with the slightly flippant nature of Kirk's response to it. There is friction about their needs and wants not matching. This whole thing with Rayna and Kirk happens within that context.

I can see that it would be logical for Spock to accept Kirk's varied dalliances in general. They are often no more than flirtations, sometimes even non-consensual on Kirk's part, often just for the sake of the mission. Spock might logically realize that Kirk, as a bisexual, has certain needs that he, an acespec gay man, can't always meet. But at the end of the episode, they always ride off together into the proverbial sunset the galaxy, looking out into the unknown, side by side where they belong. But this time, it's different. This time it's death by a thousand cuts. Here's why.

1

It starts out innocently enough. Spock is interested in playing this beautiful antique piano; their host, Flint, encourages it and recommends Kirk and Rayna dance.

Spock is playing so beautifully, but Kirk only has eyes for Rayna.

The two press closer and closer, and the camera cuts various times to the reaction of Flint, who is in love with Rayna. Usually when they cut to Spock it is to show him playing. But then he looks up and raises an eyebrow at the pair. It is a level of tension that matches Flint's.

(Also, not Bones glaring at Kirk like a similarly jilted lover when he comes in to find them dancing, yay for #mcspirk #mckirk)

2

Later in the scene, Spock is trying to tell Kirk about an important clue he has discovered regarding their host's true nature, but on the surface it sounds an awful lot like infodumping about Brahms, the classical music composer. Kirk blows him off with a dismissive hand-wave. "Later, Spock."

Kirk usually delights in Spock's infodumping, standing there with heart eyes and hanging on his every word. Getting shut down by his safe person like this is a type of rejection that is painful to anyone, but particularly painful to an autistic person. Poor "emotionless" Spock literally looks like he's been slapped.

His face falls and he busies himself studying the sheet music again.

Kirk leaves the room, specifically urging Spock to stay here.

Spock sits back down at the piano, looking like he might cry.

3

Kirk finds himself alone in the lab with Rayna, and when they start kissing, the guard robot comes to threaten Kirk. Spock saves the day by disobeying Kirk's order to stay at the piano. He comes in at just the right moment and shoots the robot with a phaser. Kirk thanks him, but then Rayna rushes back into Kirk's arms, touching first his lips and then hers with her fingers. Spock stands there for a few seconds, blinking, stunned. His face says, "Oh. So that's what you were up to in here."

4

The next scene begins with Spock and Flint squaring off against Kirk and Rayna. It is an interesting shot composition, and to me it speaks of the parallels between Spock and Flint: both previously hopeful, now jilted lovers, equally displaced by the interest between Kirk and Rayna.

Once Flint leaves the room with a reluctant Rayna, Spock and Kirk are left alone at last. And Spock sits down in this chair. It's symbolic. It's a loveseat. There's room for two. Spock balances on one ass cheek and sits way off to one side, leaving a space for Kirk. It is a plea for connection.

Then Spock gently explains to Kirk that Flint is also into her like that. He gently reminds Kirk of the task at hand and urges him to not get distracted by the girl. But Kirk continues to pace around the room, continues to fixate on Rayna, refuses to sit down next to Spock. It is another rejection. The two resolve to go find Bones, but then Rayna enters the room and Kirk abandons that plan, ordering Spock to go ahead. He stays behind and starts kissing Rayna again. This is the second time Kirk has ditched Spock in order to make out with Rayna.

5

Flint has purposely hidden the medicine they need within the secret inner laboratory. Spock has already figured out the truth about Rayna and he knows it will be hurtful to Kirk, so he tries to stop him from going in. Spock says he will go alone.

Kirk refuses and says they will all go in together.

(Aside: This Bones sideeye right here is such a delightful #spones moment. Kirk is completely oblivious, but Bones knows something is up. He hasn't figured it out yet, but the one thing he knows is that he is not taking any of Spock's bullshit.)

Inside the lab is evidence that Rayna is actually just an android created by Flint. As Spock foresaw, Kirk is distraught.

This is the only time that Spock stands this close to Kirk in this episode. (By his side, as if he'd always been there and always will be.) I think he means it like a hug for Kirk in his devastation. Flint enters the room to confront them and explain his true nature and that of Rayna. (Kirk turns to Spock: "Spock... you knew?" ) Then Rayna enters the room.

6

Kirk and Flint are arguing over Rayna, and Kirk tells Flint, "You kept us together, Rayna and me. Because you knew I could bring her emotions alive... From the beginning, you used me."

Spock looks, again, like he is about to cry. I am wondering. Does he see himself in that statement? Does he wish it weren't true? Maybe he is thinking that, yes, it's true, this man does have the power to bring emotions alive. I know it firsthand. But how dare he make that just a part of his personality rather than something special between us?

7

Kirk begins to fistfight with Flint over Rayna.

Spock attempts to reason with him, but it's a thinly veiled insult, a barb from an angry lover. Spock is holding him back, yes, but he is hanging on to Kirk's arm, which usually means that they are communicating telepathically. Spock is not just speaking, he is also pleading with Kirk, mind to mind. And Kirk's response is the most homophobic bullshit:

SPOCK: "Captain, your primitive impulses will not alter the circumstances." KIRK: "Stay out of this. We're fighting over a woman."

The subtext being you wouldn't understand.

8

Rayna says, "I was not human. Now, I love. I... love." And then promptly keels over dead on the floor.

And once again, I wonder if Spock sees himself in this moment. He started out with a deeply repressed human half, and now he is a completely changed person. Now, he loves too. And it hurts. Maybe he wishes he could also keel over on the floor.

9

Kirk, kneeling over Rayna's body, implores Spock: "What happened?" His question is shot through with grief. He is barely speaking above a whisper. But after everything that has happened, he is still relying on Spock, as he always does, to interpret the situation for him. And Spock's answer?

"...She loved you, Captain." (The way he says it. The hooded eyes, the pained expression. There are so many layers under it. "...The way I love you." "...How could anyone blame her?" "...And loving you killed her like it's killing me.")

He continues out loud: "There was not enough time for her to adjust to the awful power and contradictions of her newfound emotions.... The joys of love made her human. And the agonies of love destroyed her."

Whatever happened to Mr. I Don't Understand Love? Mr. "You mean love as motivation?...Humans do claim a great deal for that particular emotion" just a few episodes ago (The Lights of Zetar)? This is a man who knows what he is talking about. This is a man who is speaking from experience. This is a man who loves, and whose heart is breaking because of it.

10

So why does this situation hurt so much more than all Kirk's other dalliances? Aside from all the small but hurtful things piling on each other in this episode, there are three major things: First of all, Kirk loved this woman in a large part for her intellect, which is a specific role that Spock feels he is supposed to fill for Kirk. Kirk views Rayna as an equal, which is rare for his dalliances thanks to the decidedly misogynistic portrayal of most of the series' female characters. He has, however, always viewed Spock as an equal and loved him as such.

Second, Kirk wooed and pursued this woman even in her early nonresponsiveness. He worked hard to warm her cool exterior and work his way into her heart. He "brought her emotions to life." This is also something that was once unique to Kirk's pursuit of Spock.

And finally, thirdly: this time, Kirk doesn't recover quickly from losing her. Of all the girls in all the episodes, including (while suffering from amnesia) a woman he married and made a baby with, who then died in The Paradise Syndrome, Kirk has never been this devastated. And Rayna wasn't even human!

The last few minutes of the episode have been analyzed to death by many before me, but here are my thoughts.

Kirk begins by calling himself a lonely man. Earlier in this episode, loneliness was defined as: "It is a thirst. A flower dying in the desert." How could Kirk call himself lonely when Spock is standing right in front of him?

But I am also reminded of the end of Dagger of the Mind. Bones says, "It's hard to believe that a man could die of loneliness," and Kirk responds, "Not when you've sat in that room." Spock has also experienced that room through his mind meld with Simon van Gelder. He knows that loneliness kills. And while he is in control of his outward emotions, on the inside he is absolutely panicked for Kirk. Both for the dangers of the depth of Kirk's loneliness, and for the implications for their relationship that Spock apparently does nothing to assuage that loneliness, not even when standing right there.

Spock continues to watch over Kirk as Kirk whispers, "If only I could forget," and puts his head down on the desk to fall asleep.

Then Bones comes in with an update on Flint: It seems that now, after thousands of years of life on Earth, Flint has gained the ability to die, and will die, after a normal lifespan. Spock answers, "On that day, I shall mourn." How very emotional from the emotionless Vulcan. How very symbolic. A tragically long-lived, brilliant intellectual with all the time and knowledge in the world, and nobody to share it with. Spock is looking down the barrel at his own painful future and mourning the person he will become. He has just realized that the five-year mission will not last forever. He has just realized that the love between him and Kirk might not last forever.

Who is the flower dying in the desert now?

Something in Spock has broken in this episode. And it is so, so painful to watch.

Then Bones, prompted by the sight of Kirk sleeping on the desk, proceeds to mansplain to Spock about exactly what Spock himself said a few minutes ago about the "awful power and contradictions" of love. That is Spock's quote, not Bones. Here is Bones'.

BONES: You wouldn't understand that, would you, Spock? You see, I feel sorrier for you than I do for him because you'll never know the things that love can drive a man to. The ecstasies, the miseries, the broken rules, the desperate chances, the glorious failures, the glorious victories. All of these things you'll never know simply because the word love isn't written into your book.

Kind of the same thoughts with more words. Bones, weren't you listening? I get that is meant to underscore the point. We won't dwell on it too much, although I would think Bones would know better. (I am reminded of their conversation in Bread and Circuses, when Spock says "Really, Doctor?" and Bones answers, "I know. I'm worried about Jim too.")

"You'll never know the things that love will drive a man to," Bones says. Spock raises his eyebrow to that. It's another "Really, Doctor?" but Bones doesn't catch it this time.

Bones leaves the room with a final wish: "I do wish he could forget her." And Spock is once again standing guardian over a sleeping Kirk.

What is he thinking? Is he thinking that he might still have the power to save their relationship from the thousands of cuts and tears? Is he thinking that he has to save his dearest friend, and love, from dying in the desert of loneliness? Is he thinking that this is what Kirk wants from him, based on how he expressed a wish to forget (which Bones then reiterated)? It is a mystery. But you already know how the rest of it goes. You already know how he opens his mind and his heart. You already know how he bridges the chasm, crosses the eternal few steps between himself and Kirk.

You already know the absolute agony on his face as he whispers, "Forget." He may be saying it to himself as much as he is saying it to Kirk.

[genericpuff]

Hey Puff,

I'm someone who has always struggled with how to do research "correctly," but have lurked around the community enough to know RS had a real tendency for… not doing enough. Do you have any recommendations, not necessarily specific to Greek mythos, on how to just do research? Is Wikipedia even a good jumping off point?

Thanks!

Biggest thing, at least for me, is being thorough! The reason a lot of folks tend to side-eye Wikipedia as a "source" isn't just because it's relatively easy for anyone to edit, but also because Wikipedia itself is a library of sources and not the source itself.

Wikipedia can be a perfectly acceptable jump off point, as long as you're actually jumping to the places it can lead to - and you can do that through References.

Let's use the Wikipedia entry for Persephone as an example.

Sourcing "improperly" through Wikipedia would be to simply source directly from one of the sentences listed here and calling it a day. No further digging on where the excerpt comes from, no cross-referencing with other material, just reading the part on Wikipedia that says she was a vegetation goddess, slapping it into an essay or adaption or whatever, and then not confirming it further or picking apart the why of her status as a vegetation goddess through extended research.

Sooo what do we do to find that info? Let's search the word 'vegetation' and see if anything else comes up.

There we go, that has a bit more detail. And from here, we can click the little '19' at the end of the paragraph, which will take us to the References section at the bottom of the page.

Aaaand boom! Now you've got an actual source that you can dig into further, if you so choose. There isn't a whole lot that I can access of this sourced book online, but I was able to find an excerpt where the author sourced Cicero, a Roman poet and philosopher (among other things) who lived during the rise of the Roman empire:

That said, sometimes these sources aren't quite so easy to track down. That's where cross-referencing can help - but that means leaving Wikipedia!

Where this concerns a Greek goddess, let's see what we can find on Theoi, another great resource specifically pertaining to Greek / Roman / etc. deities, stories, and customs.

Though it's not quite as clickable as Wikipedia, Theoi also does a good job at outlining sources in their descriptions. Though Bennett isn't mentioned here, Hesiod and Cicero are, and wouldn't you know it, they're sourced on Theoi as well.

So there you have it! Even though Bennett is from the early 2000's, he did his own work to outline and source poets and academics whose work he was now documenting himself. This means the odds of Bennett simply making shit up are low because he sourced from the preserved works of the era he's speaking on and those works are referenced again through other resource libraries such as Theoi.

What ALL that helps with at the very least - aside from the opinions one could have about the sources themselves (Ovid 😒) - is to legitimize the research. We know without a shadow of a doubt that Persephone was attributed to vegetation and the harvest because there are so many sources across different cultures and backgrounds and generations stating it as such. It thus makes the conclusions a lot more credible, even when they're coming from a more modern source, because that source was built on their own research and sources from the Greek/Roman/etc. documents that have been preserved (and there's still new stuff being found!!!)

Obviously there are always arguments to be made about the material itself, especially when it comes to the debates over translations and cultural contexts, but actually following up on initial searches with referencing and cross-referencing is a lot more reliable and credible than simply taking something from Wikipedia and saying "I read it on the Internet."

As much as the effectiveness of Google and Wikipedia as legitimate research sources is frowned upon, they are incredibly effective, you just need to know where to look and how to find it, and most importantly - how to verify it.

And that's just the online stuff! Libraries are still alive and well! Many universities contribute to search engines like WorldCat which are designed specifically for research papers, published articles, and textbooks! Point is, the world around us is full of knowledge and resources, so the key is to learn how to navigate it so you can get the most out of it!

This is ultimately why it's so important to not restrict yourself to the first Google result - I know it's "easier" due to the convenience of it all, but you're also robbing yourself of the opportunity to really expand your knowledge beyond the summary of a targeted first result, and it runs the risk of sourcing from illegitimate sources or sources that are controlled by Google's own self-interests (protip: have a very specific problem but Googling it just gets you a bunch of automated sponsor posts and completely useless results? add 'reddit' to the end of your search, you'll get human answers from real human beings and there's always at least ONE other person who's had the same problem and posted about it to reddit LMAO seriously this one's saved my skin so many times)

And when you learn to do research the way that works for your brain? It's really, really fun. A lot more fun than public school led many of us to believe. If you learn best from talking and engaging with people, then go talk to people! Participate in groups and forums that are dedicated to the topic you're researching! If you learn best from listening to audio material, then try out audiobooks, they can often be found online through various means (🏴‍☠️) BUT ebooks and audiobooks are stocked at libraries too!

But of course, that leads us to what makes for bad research, and I obviously can't use any other example in this context than Rachel herself, whose "research" is evidently often the first recommended result that pops up on Google. And yes, I can say evidently because we've proven this when she tried to source the term 'xenia' into LO as a definition. Not only was it copy pasted to the point of still containing typos, but it was sourced plainly from a Princeton study guide that is now severely outdated - not the work that that study guide was sourcing from in and of itself.

(notice how she just sourced it as "princeton.edu" and not the specific URL that it came from)

If she really wanted to sound well-researched with the cheeky insert of the definition of xenia linking to a smart-sounding location (we're gonna ignore that it ruins the flow of the comic) then she could have sourced it from literally any of these:

But instead she did the equivalent of an 8th grader copy pasting a sentence from Wikipedia and calling it "research". It's not research. It's a lazy shortcut and it doesn't facilitate any real learning.

This can be seen in other instances as well, such as Metis' design:

As well as Leto, who I kinda think Rachel mixed up with the Full Metal Alchemist character of the same name when googling her because I can think of no other explanation as to why she's a sun goddess in LO when she has zero affiliation with the sun in the myths aside from being Apollo's mother-

(I can't prove that this is what happened but it's hilarious to think about; I'm also low key suspicious that Rachel accidentally mixed in some sources of the Métis people because Metis' design is very... Indigenous-coded 🤨)

^^^ This. This is all bad research. It's not a bad thing if Rachel's interest in Greek myth started through works like Hercules or other creative adaptions, that's actually how it starts for many of us. Where she failed was by trying to sell herself as a "folklorist" and her work as a "retelling", without actually following through in her research. She would often only do just enough to make herself seem well educated on the subject to anyone whose knowledge was as basic - or less - than hers, but not enough that it could actually hold up in a real discussion about Greek myth with other people who are more read up on it than her. Rachel's self-proclaimed "folklorist" title is only validated by the lowest common denominator of readers, who 99% of Lore Olympus ended up being made for in the end, while those who actually understood the myths deeper than their Wikipedia summaries pulled their hair out in frustration every time Rachel tried to make some sly reference to a myth or attempted to speak about it in interviews.

Comparisons aside, the best part is that this research process doesn't have to be exclusive to studying historical stuff! Writing a story that features a disabled character, but you yourself are not disabled and are worried you're going to misrepresent? Search up articles and posts that pertain to the specific disability you're trying to write; I guarantee you that there are people living with that disability offering up that information completely for free because they want to see more representation for themselves in media. Trying to learn how to draw characters of different body types / skin colors / etc. from your own? Seek out the works and advice of those who do have those physical differences and learn from them.

It's about being thorough. It's about opening yourself up to things you may have been blind to before. It's about embracing the learning experience as a positive sign of growth, not a negative sign of failure. It's about taking the opportunity to learn every time it presents itself, even if those opportunities are small and passive. A person who doesn't know is just a person who hasn't learned yet (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و

[casscainmainly]

Hi! I've loved reading your thoughts on Cass and other overlooked characters on this blog, it's really opened my eyes and made me want to explore canon more (sadly until recently I was solely into fanon)

I've seen you talk about Steph a lot, and you seem like one of the best people to ask about her. See, I've only ever seen shallow portrayals of her in fanon, and when I've tried looking into canon, I get...mixed portrayals at best. Especially when it comes to her dynamic with Bruce or Tim. And I'll admit I got put off by it.

But since you've already made me excited to learn more about Cass, I figured if you like Steph too, she must have more to her than what I've stumbled onto. So if it's not too much trouble, could you recommend some comics/stories to help someone trying to lose the fanon goggles get to know (and hopefully adore) her?

Hi!! I'm so glad you're diving into comics, it's a wild ride but honestly a lot of fun <333. And Steph is definitely a character with incredible amounts of depth to her. For a full reading list, check out @bitimdrake's reading order (it stops at the New 52 which is a company-wide reboot, for post-N52 stories check out this page and then this one).

Steph's portrayals are often marred by misogyny both in and out of text. Her relationship with Bruce can be off-putting, and sometimes her treatment will be absolutely infuriating. However, all of this makes her super interesting to me - she's a character who refuses to give up, whose tenacity is so strong it even defies real life mandates to erase and belittle her! If you stick with her, you will come out with a character who's so much more than anyone ever thought she'd be.

I'm not a Steph expert by any means, so I'd recommend asking Steph-centric blogs like @a-bad-case-of-the-stephs (whose metas are incredible) because you might get better recommendations from them! But for Steph stories I've personally enjoyed, they are:

Batman: Huntress/Spoiler - Blunt Trauma: After an earthquake, Steph teams up with Huntress to take down some bad guys. This one issue undoes a lot of fanon - it dives into Steph's outlook on life, moral beliefs, and her relationship with her father. Highly recommend!

Batgirl (2000) #26, 28: In Cass' Batgirl run, Steph features as a prominent side character and their relationship is one of my absolute favourites. #26 is a Steph-centric issue where she fills in for Cass, and explores her insecurities in a really fascinating way. #28 is also a Steph highlight, showcasing her perseverance and why Cass is so impressed with her.

Solo (2004) #10: Not sure if it's in-continuity, but Damion Scott (Cass' co-creator) has a super fun story in here about Robin!Steph and Cass. Just really adorable and fun, and one of the best encapsulations of the Steph-Cass dynamic.

Batgirl (2009): Jumping over to Steph's Batgirl run, it does hit better if you've read Robin '93 but honestly it's good either way. Steph has so much personality in this run, it's incredibly fun and shows her humour, resilience, and heart, as well as some of her flaws. Really really worth reading!

Bruce Wayne: The Road Home: Batgirl: A Bruce-Steph story that may require some context, but it's probably the best Bruce and Steph reconciliation we'll ever get. Very interesting insights into how Bruce and Steph see each other, as well as a really iconic slap.

A general rec for Steph is Robin (1993), which is important for her Spoiler and Robin days (I assume this is the run you've tried though). Detective Comics (2016) is not really the best Steph portrayal, but it's far from the worst and has a really nice one panel about Robin!Steph.

I hope this helps!! Steph is an amazing character who deserves a lot more from both fandom and DC, so any interest in her is greatly appreciated :))).

[canmom]

Hello! I absolutely love your blog, everything from your festival recounts to animation analysis and programming (one of tumblr's recommended posts was the one where you made your own rasteriser, and I liked your attitude in what I've read so much that I'm gonna attempt to conquer my 3-year-long grudge against using opengl during college and do something similar now that I'm a bit older and have no deadlines :D).

But anyway, I have 2 questions (sorry if there's easily accessible answers, tumblr search is not helping): 1. During your animation nights, does the screen stay black while everyone watches their own video while you provide commentary? I haven't caught any yet but maybe someday! And 2. do you have any youtube channels or just one-off video essays that you like that also cover animation/directors? Or, even programming lol.

Sorry for the long ask have a nice day!

hiii! i'm very touched that you like my dorky eclectic blog <3

For the Animation Nights, I just stream the video over Twitch from local sources on my computer, typically by playing the video in mpv and recording it in OBS. This is obviously not ideal from a video quality perspective, but it's the easiest way to watch video in sync without making everyone download files in advance. Then we all chat in the Twitch chat box (in large part to crack stupid jokes, it's not that highbrow lmao). I've gotten away with it so far!

As for youtube channels, I can recommend...

anime production/history (i.e. sakuga fandom)

SteveM is likely the most sakuga-fan affiliated anituber. He makes long, well-researched and in-depth videos on anime history, usually themed around a particular director or studio.

Pyramid Inu might be my fave anituber - very thoughtful analysis of Gundam, obscure mecha anime and oldschool BL and similar topics. tremendously soothing voice too.

The Canipa Effect does excellent deep dives into the production of specific shows, both western and anime. I appreciate the respect he gives to the Korean animators of shows like AtlA in particular!

Sean Bires's 2013 presentation on sakuga is pretty foundational to this whole subcultural niche, and a great place to get an introduction to the major animator names to know and significant points in the history of anime. unfortunately a couple of the segments got slapped down by copyright but the rest holds up!

animation theory (for animators and aspirants)

I'm going to focus here on resources that are relevant to animation in general, and 2D animation. if I was going to list every Blender channel we'd be here all week :p

New Frame Plus is one of the best channels out there for game animation, describing in tightly edited videos how animation principles work in a game context and analysing the animation of various games. highly recommend

Videogame Animation Study is similar, examining the animation of specific games in detail

the 'twelve principles of animation' (defined by Disney's Ollie Johnston and Frank Thomas) remain the standard approach to animation pedagogy; there are various videos on them, but Alan Becker (of Animator vs Animation) has quite a popular series. I haven't actually watched these but many people swear by them! Dermot O'Connor expands the list to 21. Note that some of the terminology can be a little inconsistent between different animators - c.f. 'secondary motion'...

Dong Chang is an animator at Studio NUT, who produces a lot of fantastic, succinct videos on standard techniques in the anime industry, timesheet notations, etc. etc. Studio Bulldog, a small anime studio, are a good complement; they focus more on douga than genga and are generally a bit more traditional.

programming

big topic here, I'm going to focus on game dev and tech art since that's my field. but also some general compsci stuff that's neat

SimonDev - graphics programmer with a bunch of AAA experience, fantastic explanations of advanced optimisations and some of the more counterintuitive aspects of rendering

Acerola - graphics programmer who makes very detailed guides to a variety of effects with a very rapid and funny 'guy that has seen monogatari' editing style. When he's good, he's really good. His video on water is probably the best one I've seen (though I can recommend a couple of others).

TodePond - the most charming, musical videos about recursion and cellular automata you've ever seen. less programming tutorial and more art in themselves.

Ben Eater - known for his breadboard computer series, a fantastic demonstration of how to go from logic gates up to the 6502 with actual hardware. worth watching just for how clean he puts the wires on his breadboards like goddamn man

Sebastian Lague, Useless Game Dev - both do 'coding adventure' style videos where they spend a few weeks on some project and then document it on Youtube, resulting in a huge library of videos about all sorts of fascinating techniques. great to dive into

Freya Holmér - creator of the 'shapes' library, makes videos on mathematical programming, with gorgeously animated vector graphics. Her video on splines is a particular treat.

There are definitely many more channels I can recommend on these subjects, but I'll need to dig into my history a bit - unfortunately I need to rush out right now, but hopefully that should be good to be getting going with!

[brw]

hi hello do you perhaps have hank pym reading recommendations? you seem to have a very nuanced read on him and it's made me curious

Hello! I'll do my best to offer comics I think about a lot or I consider particularly definitive for a certain take or era that will hopefully offer some stuff for you to latch on to and think about, but it is hard to recommend things that will definitely give you the same impression I get or anything, largely because there's a thousand different interpretations of these comics and it's very possible to have a very uncharitable view on Hank even if you did read every issue I have, just because different things stand out to different people, and all the rest. There are people who have read every issue of Tales to Astonish and see it as just misogynistic drivel, while I read it differently, and so forth.

It's also difficult because a lot of the stuff with Hank psychologically sort of happens in the background of the Avengers for over a decade from issue 1 to the early 80s with issue 230, which makes it hard to recommend because it's a big chunk of comics to read and almost happens accidentally across multiple writers and multiple eras. Even the issues where Hank's mental health and its decline is more present and in the spotlight are still contextualised by those middle issues where it's really just a background hum, and it's a very slow thing to read and go through in between so many other character arcs and stories. I'll do my best to offer the very major arcs, but keep in mind there's always smaller issues and scenes across all these issues, so while it's an intimidating read I would say it's a big part of why I have the read I do, because I've read a lot of that era and a lot goes on during it.

Anyway, here's the list! I did my best to make it comprehensive, although it is pretty long, so don't be afraid to kind of jump around. In my own reading, I read a lot of things out of order, so while the order I'm putting these in is mostly chronological, it isn't all that important in my opinion so if you want to jump around between eras please feel free to do so!

Avengers Origins: Ant-Man and the Wasp

This is an artistic reinterpretation of Hank and Janet's origin story, and is usually the one I pull from when thinking about them in the modern day. Seeks to add a little more balance to their early dynamic, and I quite like how they're both characterised.

Tales to Astonish V1 #27, #35-#69

The original Tales to Astonish run! Janet joins in issue #44, and in the last 9 issues of the run, Hulk takes up the second half of the issues, so you can either read those or ignore them. These have all the issues you can expect from old comics, misogyny, racism, etc, but they're very important in my opinion to see the Hank that was before he really joins the Avengers, and also to get a taste for like, the specific kind of Silver Age hero he is that I think is important to his makeup. They're also very goofy and fun and I have a good time reading them. If you want extra homework, I recommend watching some screwball comedies such as Bringing Up Baby, The Philadelphia Story or Ball of Fire, as I think that kind of dynamic was heavily inspirational for how Stan Lee and the other ToA writers approached Hank and Jan.

Avengers V1 #57, #161-#162, #212-#230

This is roughly all of the major Hank moments in the main Avengers title, trigger warning for the slap panel in issue #213. As I said, there's other issues that have moments that kind of add some flavour and texture to this whole arc, but these are the major issues I think are important context to him and his character. The latter half of the Trail or Yellowjacket arc is actually incredibly interesting to me, it's a real big shame that that arc has been so dominated by that single panel when so much other storytelling is going on there. Oh well.

Marvel Feature #4–#11

A short lived attempt at recreating Tales to Astonish as a Hank solo title in the 70s, a nonetheless interesting and underrated story that leads into;

Giant Size Defenders #4

Hank teams up with the Defenders and goes a little crazy trying to protect Egghead's niece.

West Coast Avengers V2

So this is understandably a lot to read and similar to the Avengers, there's brief moments sprinkled throughout this series that don't necessarily translate into issue recommendations. However, issues and arcs to look out for is #4-#7, where Good Ultron shows up, #17, where he attempts suicide, and #33, which has things to do with Maria Trovaya. I would also stick around for the Roy Thomas era of the series, which starts from #60 following Byrne's departure. Hank leaves in issue #74, as it seems the main Avengers title wanted him and Jan back.

Marvel Double Feature: Giant-Man

So, I've actually never found a scan of this comic online. I believe it was a B story in reprints of Avengers #379-#383 and so hasn't been included much in uploads? I found mine in the Ant-Man/Giant-Man Growing Pains trade, although I don't know how available that is to you, so if you can't track this one down, don't worry about it, but if you can, I do recommend it.

Tales to Astonish V3

Brief one-shot of Hank and Janet on a solo adventure together. Fun showcase of their post-divorce dynamic.

Avengers V3

So, as with Avengers V1 and West Coast Avengers, Hank is sharing a lot of panel space with a lot of other characters so recommendations are tricky. As with before, I will focus on issues he's undoubtedly a major character in, but if you're interested in reading the whole thing I recommend that. Issues of note are #19-#22, which is the Ultron Unlimited arc and seeks to unpack a lot of the baggage around Hank, Janet and Ultron, as well as Vision and Simon, and #36-#38, #43 and Avengers Annual 2001, which deal with Hank being replaced by himself, and then needing to merge the Yellowjacket and Goliath parts of his brain, or whatever.

Ant-Man's Big Christmas

A fairly lighthearted series that maybe won't help with an in depth nuanced read of his character but nonetheless is a nice little reminder of the beforetimes of the Ultimates and 2000s in general.

There's a big gap here, as the Geoff Johns and Chuck Austen Avengers stuff genuinely isn't worth a look in my opinion unless you're interested in how the 2000s treated Hank as the Ultimates became a popular series and how that translated to him in the main universe. Soon after, Hank gets replaced by the skrulls and so is missing for a few years after that, so we take a jump and arrive at-

Mighty Avengers V1 #21-#36

I'll be honest–I don't like this era for Hank, but I do think it's major as a look into how Hank deals with grief and trauma, although that certainly wasn't Dan Slott's intention. It's a weird comic. Hank comes across as very Yellowjacket-esque, but he never loses or suffers or fails the way he did as Yellowjacket. He doesn't ruin any of his relationships, while he's clearly unstable he never outright hallucinates or snaps, and all in all has a number of wins throughout this title. It's a weird one, but worth looking at.

Ant-Man and Wasp

Set in the early days of Avengers Academy, Hank and the new Ant-Man, Eric O'Grady team-up. Not much to say, but does spend time on Hank's feelings of grief over Bill Foster who tragically died during Civil War while Hank was in skrull town.

Avengers Academy V1

Hank's the main teacher over this series and whil the bulk of the series does focus on the kids because it's a children's comic, Hank is often in the background and his relationship with Tigra is one of the cornerstones of this comic.

Avengers A.I.

How I miss you Avengers A.I.... Hank and Vision lead the team, this is the series that chooses bipolar as the language for Hank's mental health going forward whereas before they stook with schizophrenia, etc.

Rage of Ultron

Hank dies here, and ends up merged with Ultron. A comic with great potential, a shame how every subsequent writer executed it.

Ant-Man V3

The Al Ewing anniversary series! To be honest, you only need to read #1 and #4, but you might as well read the whole thing, its only the four issues.

Avengers Inc.

Hank comes back formally from the dead here. I don't care for this series, and they tragically hit him with the MCU synergy beam, but it is what it is.

So that's about most of it! I hope this helps, and I hope you enjoy reading!

[horseplunko]

@momsforroadhead Oh hell yeah it's my time to shine baby. I'm just gonna list some fun/interesting stuff, you might know some of these already:

People made an amazing fan zine for their movie Gorilla Interrupted (watch it if you haven't. And the documentary too). I unfortunately wasn't part of the fandom at that time, otherwise I would've loved to contribute. Check it out here

This clip from their 2003 short Where's Deathlist. Mike truly is a method actor. (TW fake vomit but as someone with pretty severe emetophobia this is still fucking hilarious to me).

Honestly, all their old stuff in general is a complete rabbit hole I can only recommend going into. The GI documentary is a pretty good starting point. There's the whole Garrett incident, the big Mikejay fight from the early/mid-00s which caused Mike to move to a different state for a while only to come back because they couldn't live without each other I guess, Mike saving Rich's family photos (you probably know that one). Mike slapping Jay that one time so he'd properly get into character and Jay saying it helped (I can't find it right now but this is from a older forum post). There is. So much. Lore.

If you dig deep enough through the wayback machine or year old reddit posts or whatever you'll find some pretty interesting stuff. Recently I found a post by the director of Tales Of Genesis Space responding to his video appearing in a BotW

Mike and Jay used to make wedding videos which is apparently where the rlm name comes from (red letter day - an important happy day). In an older patreon video I noticed several awards hanging on a wall, and among them was an award for something called "the best of weddings" (I think, it's very blurry), which might be from this website

Pre-Rec. It's so fun to have on in the background and especially the episodes with Jay are awesome. Lots of good clips floating around here. It's notable how much different Mike is in the streams compared to videos, he seems super nervous in a live context (and has mentioned before that he dislikes talking in front of crowds, which gets really obvious if you watch this interview for example)

They never throw stuff away. Ever. For example they have the leather jacket from GI to this day. It makes me emotional

I could list more (never ask someone about their hyperfixation) but I'll keep it at this for now. I'm normal I swear (at least more than the 4Chan weirdos who hunted after Jay's driving license or Mike's address. yeesh.)

[a-bad-case-of-the-stephs]

Oh also bestie do you have any reading recs for Steph stories but like. Not the common ones (i.e her solo, mainline appearances in Robin93 or Batgirl00, etc). bc I literally bought the JLI 1990 annual (the justice league Antarctica issue) bc it had cluemaster on it and it was the closest I could get to a Steph comic (genuine insanity on my part. This is before Steph was even introduced too she's not even mentioned 😭)

I have ofc read her DC showcase and her Solo short story by Damion Scott (which are some of her better known 'bonus material' I'm thinking) but I honestly don't mind rereading any of her stuff (I might reread her stuff from the Jon Lewis era of Robin bc I generally enjoy his take on Steph a lot).

Anyway feel free to take your time, Lord knows when I'll be free to read these (end of term hell) but yeah. Need more Steph in my life right now and she's not appearing in any books currently so...

I’m sure any comic i could mention you’ve already seen, so I’m not sure how much help I could be unfortunately. I will try my best however!!

If you’re doing rereads I have to start with mentioning Bruce Wayne The Road Home: Batgirl (2010). It holds such a special place in my heart. The closest thing we get to acknowledgment and catharsis for all the fucked up ways Batman treated Steph. It’s got a few weird lines but generally a very uplifting read for me. They finally let her slap Batman in the face!! Huge win!!!

One Steph related comic I hadn’t read until super recently is Suicide Squad #1 (2001), the comic where Arthur Brown “dies”. I always figured Arthur died in a suicide squad given the context we get in Robin 1993 but I never actually got around to finding and reading the actual issue until fairly recently. Definitely recommend checking it out if you haven’t yet, steph isn’t in it physically but there’s a few Steph mentions and they’re all Fucked up.

Birds of Prey #99 (1999) is a another good one where Steph is not there physically (she was busy being dead at the time), but she gets mentioned in a really fucked up manner. Important to my understanding of Babs and Stephs relationship in Batgirl 2009, it’s sort of a precursor to their relationship there. Also just great for the tragedy of Stephanie’s death and how people acted about her once she was dead vs towards her when she was still kicking. Also a win for Steph and Jason Todd parallels.

If you’re rereading Jon Lewis’s run you KNOW I have to mention Robin 111. So much is there. Her huge sweater. Her horrible bruise. Her fuckass bob. Her little smile. Her eyebags. The pure sweetness and raw anger and soft hurt. Big comic for me.

The Robin/Spoiler Special (2008) is very interesting and I haven’t seen anyone talk about it here (then again I am super new to tumblr so I’m sure it’s been discussed). A lot of the art is extraordinarily beautiful, and it’s the only comic which shows us any part of Stephanie’s Dead Year (that I’m aware of) so it gets points for that. I haven’t broken it down very much in my head but there’s really a Lot to look at and consider.

Another Steph comic I just recently finished fully reading is Batman Family (2002). 8 issue series I generally found enjoyable. Steph only appears in issues #2 and #8, and generally plays a minimal role. It’s mostly of interest to me bc where it takes place chronologically. It takes place more of less immediately after BW:Fugitive concludes. So for steph, about when she was fired as Spoiler but didn’t know It yet. I’ve been trying to place each issue timeline wise for her because there’s some fucked up Tim Drake related connotations depending.

Secret Origins 80 Page Giant (1998) is another essential steph appearance for me. It gives us harrowing insight into a lot of aspects of Stephs childhood, her relationship with Crystal, her experiences with abuse, and a painfully sweet glance at how she saw Batman when she was a kid. Takes place mid-pregnancy arc where Steph reflects on her past.

Idk if these count as ‘mainline’ but I feel like I have to mention Gotham Knights #22 and #37 (2000) anyway. Essential to my understanding of Stephanie’s dynamic with Batman during her time sanctioned as Spoiler. I reread these all the fucking time. They are exceedingly sad from a Steph POV so reread with caution.

Anyway, hope I was able to be at least a little helpful. Would srsly love to hear ur thoughts on any or all of these if you end up reading or rereading. No pressure, like you said, it’s a pretty busy time!

[ducktracy]

You know, for all the pseudo-remakes McKimson did, I'm almost surprised he never tried one for Lost and Foundling but with Foghorn and Henery instead

LOL, contrastly i am NOT SURPRISED AT ALL he never did that because the very genuine sentimentality in that short (which i highly recommend everyone scope out, it is probably one of the best Sniffles shorts out there and IMO has the best balance between blabbermouth Sniffles and cutesy Sniffles) is like. the exact antithesis of everything Bob McKimson stands for. and imagining this is really making me laugh hysterically. i love love love McKimson shorts but sentimentality was not a strong point of his at all, and that is very much often why i like McKimson cartoons. everyone is an embittered cretin who hates each other and are dying to smack the internal organs out of anyone who mildly inconveniences them

i'm SURE i'm wrong in saying this, surely there is something more sentimental that i'm not thinking of at the moment. nevertheless, this bit from Dog Collared is the most "wholesome" i can think of a McKimson cartoon getting. and i do adore this scene a TONNNN which is why i'm shilling it HAHA. Stalling's score of "My Buddy" is magical. but to quote a friend, "if you only saw this clip you'd think it's a totally heartwarming cartoon" and it is wholly dependent on that lack of context

context LITERALLY RIGHT BEFORE THIS is that the dog is about to kill himself BECAUSE OF PORKY!!!!!!!! PORKY IS SLAPPING HIM AND CALLING HIM A MONGREL AND A MUTT!!!!! and his only interest in returning the dog home is wholly due to monetary motivation.

i sincerely think this may be the most wretched Porky behaves in his entire filmography (and i personally don't buy that he's a person really easily swayed by a big price tag) and it consequently is also some of the hardest i've ever laughed at a cartoon because of just how horribly awful and mean he is in it. thankfully the Funny prevails and it's not miserable to watch (save for a very egregious and tasteless bit that very much shows this cartoon's age but is thankfully easy to skip). BUT YES, it is very telling that one of the most "wholesome" moments in a McKimson cartoon is tied to one of his most mean (and that being the joke) that i can think off the top of his head, and the motivations for this wholesome are a huge disingenuous farce

the entire opening of this short is a masterpiece though and a great look into the McKimson frame of mind. and is exactly why i could never see him doing a Lost and Foundling type short

the wholesome "father" son bonding in a Jones short

versus wholesome father son bonding in a McKimson short

BUT! it is worth mentioning that Henery was initially a Jones creation, so... there's some sort of link here somewhere

[explosionshark]

Your turn!

It's halfway through the year! Got any favorite albums/books/tv shows/whatever to recommend?

thanks to you @badwolfwho1 who both asked me!

music:

right off the top i'm gonna recommend 3 pop albums bc i almost never have this many TO recommend. but tei shi's valerie, empress of's for your consideration, and shygirl's club shy EP have all been on constant repeat for me this year.

big year for metal also - in particular crypt sermon, job for a cowboy, darkest hour, gatecreeper, aborted and tzompantli were all incredible. i feel like between seeing them live and the release of cure, this is the first time erra has really clicked for me and i'm loving it.

for post-hardcore i've loved the debut LPs by with sails aheads and your ghost in glass. the EP lonely people by love rarely was on repeat for me for weeks also - really great stuff.

i got heaven by mannequin pussy slaps too. and i also really, really want to recommend you could do it tonight by couch slut - if you love the queasy, depraved noise that chat pile make, you absolutely should be listening to couch slut.

i threw a couple little playlists together to roundup some of my faves:

(extended version here)

honorable mention: as was really apparent from my charts this year, i spent A LOT of time listening to the saosin s/t again. but also got really back into grouper this year - especially her 2021 album shade, which i missed entirely when it came out.

books:

okay for music i focused mostly on 2024 releases but for books i won't be so strict.

shirley jackson: a rather haunted life by ruth franklin was REALLY good and provided a lot of great insight into jackson's work and also just had some really interesting history in it. really enjoyed it.

hit so hard by patty schemel a rock music and addiction memoir by the drummer of Hole. very dark and upsetting at points, but compelling. was very illuminating re: the 90s seattle music scene and the drug culture around it, provided a lot of context and detail to some stuff i thought i already knew about. really great stuff.

penance by eliza clark - this is a fake true crime book that REALLY got under my skin. it's a meta commentary on true crime as a fandom and an industry and the exploitation inherent in it. it's a mirror to make you stare at your own internal biases. it's SO fucking 2014 tumblr. i've gotten like three other people to read it and they all went insane like me. highly recommended.

hex by thomas olde heuvelt - very late to the party on this one but i loved it. translated AND localized from dutch, with very interesting results. almost goofy to start and ends up totally bleak. i adored it.

magic for beginners and white cat, black dog by kelly link - REALLY falling in love with kelly link this year. read these two and currently re-reading stranger things happen and i just adore her style. weird but SO heartfelt, surreal and dreamy, as often horrifying as it is sweet. she's so talented, i'm really excited to read the book of love later this year.

between two fires by christopher buehlman - FINALLY read this and i loved it. absolutely deserves the hype. kinda wild that dark ages horror isn't more of a thing? i re-read buehlman's the blacktongue thief too and really loved it, definitely cemented it as one of my favorite fantasy books. i'm reading the daughters' war now and enjoying it a lot.

i also re-read the golden enclaves by naomi novik and had such a great time with it.

tv shows:

finished my buffy re-watch! been watching a ton of xena with @holdsteady and @nataliving this year too - we just finished s3 and it was insane and i loved it soooo much.

i watched under the bridge and thought it was very good, but i'd recommend people learn a little about the real reena virk case before engaging.

hacks season 3 was INSANE it made me crazy i loved it so much.

haven't watched much tv aside from that!

[lou-is-lurking]

⛓️ ℭ𝔥𝔞𝔦𝔫 𝔐𝔞𝔦𝔩 ⛓️

I bring motivation! Post the working titles of 10 WIPs (optional) and write three new sentences for each

Hello, anon 🥰Thanks so much for this ask 💜

I know it's been months, but I didn't forget - I just wasn't writing very much at the end of last year. I wanna change that this year, and this ask fits my chaotic writing habits very well, since I'm bouncing around between WIPs all the time, anyway. Took me a while to add something to 10 WIPs, but here we go

Also, I wanna expand the challenge: for anyone who replies with or sends me the number of any of these WIPs I'll add another sentence! 🥰

1. - One of Your Girls - otayuri, post-canon, E

“Pasha,” he says to his cat curled up at the foot of his bed, keeping his ever watchful judgmental eyes on him, “I think I gotta buy a wig.”

Pasha looks at him for a moment, then slowly gets up, stretches, and hops off the bed to leave the room.

Otabek sighs. “Fair enough.”

2. - Three Body Problem - omegaverse Otapliroy, E

“Hypothetically," Otabek said, "Would you have bonded with her?”

JJ let out an annoyed breath that made his nostrils flare.

“Yes, I would have,” he hissed, eyes hard, “I'd bond with a goddamn table-cloth if it got me out of here, Beks.”

3. - Untitled Camboy AU - otayuri, E

His make-up seems to make him glow, highlighting rosy cheeks and smokey eyes and glossy pink lips. It's all stark contrasts, harsh lines and soft fabric, leather and lace, black as midnight on Yuri's milky white skin. He's the kitten and the cream all in one.

4. - Can't put my finger on it - pre-canon JJBek, M

“Shouldn't you be doing stuff like this with her now instead?”

JJ almost chokes on the shocked breath he sucks in, staring at Otabek in absolute horror.

“Are you out of your mind?!”

5. - From the Candy Store on the Corner to the Chapel on the Hill - otayuri 1950s AU, E

“You're not invited!” Katie shrieked, and hastily tried to shut the door in Otabek's face. It met the steel cap of his boot and he simply wedged himself inside, dark eyes briefly fixing her with an unimpressed glance.

“Do I look like I care?”

6. - Out of context - otayuri, post-canon, M

Great, so even the team's physiotherapist was speculating on who Yuri was sleeping with? Fucking fantastic.

“Dima, too,” Lilia added.

“The zamboni driver?!”

7. - Untitled Mafia AU no 45645327 - otayuri, E

Yuri cackled. “Kinda wanna lie and say yes just to make you mad at me.”

Otabek grabbed his chin and glared down at him.

“Wouldn't recommend that. I'm already fucking mad.”

8. - I promise I won't let you down (if you take my hand tonight) - JJ/Bella/Leo Band AU, E

“What's your favorite song of ours?” Leo asks, a safe go-to question when it comes to fans.

He wonders if he should warn her that if she says “Eyes of a Soldier” now, as many fans do, she might ruin her chances of getting anywhere near JJ's pants tonight, much less into them. It's the only song in their entire discography that Otabek wrote, and it's also their most successful song to date, reaching far beyond their usual bubble. JJ hates it with a passion that's almost comical.

9. - Uphill Battle - omegaverse otayuri, E

“He had the fucking gall to tell me he could easily take this kingdom by force if he wanted to, and I very nearly needed to change underwear.”

Mila slapped a hand over her mouth to stifle a shrill squeal. “Because you almost soiled yourself in fear, or because...?”

“Or because.” Yuri huffed, cheeks flaming.

10. - (not?) a Vampire? - otayuri, T

Someone bangs against the wall next to them, giving Yuri a start. He opens his eyes, blinking against the glaring lights from the bar and the strobelights from the dancefloor, slowly resurfacing from the haze. Next to them, one of the barkeepers is giving them an amused look.

“You might wanna take that to the backroom before it escalates, Altin.”

This was fun and actually made me write (more than just 3 sentences, in some cases, even) so thanks again for the motivation, anon <3

[splatcat64]

the same goes to you for getting excited LOL !! that was a very endearing talk about the both of them (all four of them) it was super interesting :) i love hearing other ppls thoughts on characters. honestly i see all ur points and agree with everything. :P one of the few ppl in the current blands tag (or overall, i know this place has been a nightmare) mentioning jack being a genocidal fascist so im like I Respect You . im a bit shy to babble on my thoughts but theres SOOOO MUCH. idk what u use for music so ill just tell u text so u can look it up - its on my general borderlands playlist but it was such a fiona song to me but the hand that feeds by the crane wives.. i know the lyrics are about not caring about money but the symbolism is important to me . i have parts that make me go nuts but you know . hehe

I am SO glad we’re on the same page lmao thank you!!! This really warms my heart :}

I totally understand being shy to spit out your thoughts, often, if I’m not having trouble just getting the words out in general, I’m too damn scared to say anything. Just recently I worked up the courage to actually speak what I think here. And I am GLAD I can be of service in that way oh my god. I respect u too it’s been. A huge honor, I stalk literally all the tags and it can be like a minefield. Like, It’s okay to like Jack as a character, he’s a compelling villain and I think he’s really well written. But he’s genocidal and a fascist… that can’t be ignored bl2 literally yells it at you. However an analysis of him is definitely not for this post and definitely not my strongest suit, we’ll see about that on my side.

And I use Spotify! Seeing you mention crane wives made my brain EXPLODE because not only are they a reaaaally Fiona like band, it gives real Sasha vibes, and just tales/borderlands in general. I’m definitely biased because of stuff with me and my friends own stories and headcanons and ocs, but even with a grain of salt if you or anyone wants to check more songs out pleaaase do. I definitely agree that I can see how the hand that feeds is soooo Fiona but I’m gonna go run and listen to it in the context of her now.

BUT I do have some Crane wives songs that I one, just recommend in general, and two, can fit the tales cast really well. High Horse, Curses [it’s popular I know but trust me I have a vision], and Arcturus Beaming.

High horse just reminds me of Fiona and Sasha a lot, it’s been influenced by stuff me and my best friend come up with so. Again. Biased, but it’s a GOOD song. Arcturus Beaming is new, and it’s not some people’s fav but because it reminded me so much of the tales cast I have a very good opinion of it. For lack of better words that shit was so good I immediately slapped that shit on my tales’ oc’s playlist cause holy shit. Good song. AND THE SYMBOLISM GOD. Anyways those are my recs if you wanna check them out, otherwise, Tysm and Ty for the song rec I appreciate it so so so much!!!!

[genericpuff]

Do you have any entry level recommendations for someone looking to learn a bit more about Greek mythology? I’d love to read up on it but I’m not sure how to find reputable sources and avoid Americanisation.

I mean, at the risk of sounding crass, you're likely going to run into Americanization no matter what you do because America itself was built on many cultures, especially that of Greek philosophy and storytelling.

Buuut if you mean you wanna read some actual Greek myth content that AREN'T modern American spins on classic tales, Emily Wilson is a popular choice for many people dipping their toes into translated mythology as her translations are both simplistic and concise in their language choices as well as fun in their structure to read both internally and orally (iirc her translations are done in iambic pentameter which is very familiar to anyone who's ever read Shakespeare). I've been working through her translation of The Odyssey, it's been pretty enjoyable :)

I've also heard great things about both Lattimore and Fitzgerald, the latter of whom I will be reading next after I finish Wilson's translation. That said, I haven't read either of their works yet, so take my recommendation of them with grains of salt! (I hope you enjoy them though if you check 'em out! If you beat me to it, let me know how they went!)

OH also, I know it's sorta the opposite of what you're likely looking for as it's VERY influenced by modern contexts, but thanks to another anon I recently got into Destripando la Historia which is a super fun animated Youtube series that retells the stories of various different gods from different mythologies. If you're into stuff of the goofy anime variety, you might enjoy them, it's a Spanish series but you can turn on captions to read the translations! It's super beginner-friendly, it covers a lot of different stories and myths without getting into so much detail that it's overwhelming (but gives you a good kickoff point to start with!) and the songs and animations slap, Afrodita is one of my favorites haha

Overall the biggest advice I can give you if you're trying to avoid fanfiction-y / "Americanized" retellings is just to cross-reference. If you find a retelling you really like but aren't completely sure of its legitimacy as a functional retelling, keep reading, watching, and learning more. It's a skill like any other, and the more you read, the more you'll be able to pick out what's a legitimate retelling from studied scholars vs. what's fanfiction that you don't need to take too accurately or seriously LMAO

And honestly, nothing wrong with the fanfiction stuff! Mythology, in its very nature, changes over time, it's an inevitability and many of the myths we still draw from today are often derivative in and of themselves from even older versions that pre-existed them (see: Ovid).

it's okay if your introduction to Greek myth is through derivative fanfic, stuff like Disney's Hercules and even Lore Olympus ARE fun to consume for a lot of people and make for a good entry point into learning more about the myths!

What's frustrating - and what I tend to criticize the most here - is when the fanfiction gets advertised / sold as legitimate retellings; when the fanfiction grossly misrepresents the actual mythology and yet tries to claim it as legitimate anyways which results in fanbases that are running around with completely false information claiming it as fact. If you can give the team behind Hercules credit for one thing, their rendition may not be completely accurate, BUT the folks who made it never bragged about how much smarter they were than other people about Greek myth or call themselves "folklorists" when they didn't even have any formal education/training/etc. in it cough like another creator we know cough 💀 If we want to make a comparison between LO and a Disney film in terms of how it grossly misrepresents the themes and cultural contexts of the original stories it was drawing from... Disney's Pocahontas does exactly that 💅

So if you want to avoid any "grossly" Americanized versions of Greek myth that are borderline disrespectful to the stories they're drawing from... yeah, that's usually a pretty indicative red flag LMAO

But outside of those very specific scenarios, just have fun with it, there really is no "right or wrong" way to engage with the mythology if you're simply just wanting to learn more, the beauty of it being mythology is that it's very diverse in its mediums and thus you don't have to be restricted to learning about it exclusively through academic translations or lectures. Of course, there are cultural intersections with these myths that shouldn't be ignored, we always have to treat it with care when engaging with it so that we aren't overwriting another culture's traditions or beliefs - but if you're simply wanting to learn about and entertain yourself with some amazing stories that have quite literally stood the test of time, do so however you see fit :)

[tilebytiles]

this has probably already been talked about lol but i was trying to find the puppets website for funsies and instead came across this really odd rabbit hole??? full story under the cut so i don't clog the dash or anything

so for context i have the ecosia extension installed and when i typed in "the last shadow puppets" and nothing came up i was like Hmm ok sometimes the results can be 50/50. so i hit a recommended search at the bottom that threw in the word "website" and the first 2 results were wikipedia and the domino page but the third was theageoftheunderstatement.com.

the immediate thing that threw me off was that the first sentence on the page is "Like monthly car insurance site prudentplus.com these guys are different." What. there's like a whole description of the band (which is out of date now cause the page is from 2010) but then underneath it, there's a whole thing about fast food delivery insurance (???) and how to get it, what the best way is etc etc. the prudent plus comment does have a link that leads to the insurance company in question and from what i can tell it was still active as recently as last year.

at the veeery bottom of the taotu page is "search here for uk short term cover" which has another link that leads to another page on the site about car insurance for foreign drivers. this has another link like 3/4 of the way down the page that leads to a different site that from what i can tell hasn't been updated in over a decade (at the very bottom it says copyright 2006/13).

its worth noting that if we hop back to the main page there's a box on the left side with all the songs off of taotu listed as well as a link at the bottom that leads to a page about no deposit car insurance in the uk. every song leads to a different page on the site describing the storyline of the song (and mv, if it has one) as well as the sound of the song. most of the song pages lead to different insurance things. standing next to me leads to disqualified driver insurance, calm like you leads to lorry insurance, the chamber leads to builders / business property insurance, only the truth leads to architects / beautician liability insurance, black plant leads to convicted driver insurance, and the time has come again leads to personal liability insurance.

at the bottom of the home page is the name peter marsden. initially i just tried searching his name up but then i realized the answer was right in front of me and i searched it up with "prudent plus" slapped on the end. sure enough, a page on the prudent plus site came up introducing the staff, including a man named peter. at least at the time the "about us" page was set up (idk if its still updated) he was 71 and "has an obsession for creating images of cars, people, monsters and other strange objects and beings in unusual, and sometimes impossible, environments." very cool peter!

i didn't check all the links on the songs because i didn't think there'd be much there but my only guess for the website's existence is that the insurance people saw the popularity of taotu and decided to make a page about it while promoting their insurance stuff. outside of that i have no fucking clue. maybe they're just big tlsp fans. good on you peter