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✦𝔢𝔱𝔠𝔥𝔢𝔡 𝔦𝔫 𝔰𝔱𝔦𝔩𝔩𝔫𝔢𝔰𝔰, ℑ 𝔨𝔢𝔢𝔭 𝔳𝔦𝔤𝔦𝔩 𝔣𝔬𝔯 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔪𝔬𝔪𝔢𝔫𝔱𝔰 𝔱𝔥𝔞𝔱 𝔫𝔢𝔳𝔢𝔯 𝔠𝔞𝔪𝔢✦

ᵂᵉᵇˢⁱᵗᵉ

ᴵⁿˢᵗᵃᵍʳᵃᵐ

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Slippery when wet, Alien: Covenant (2017)

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everybody give it up for female characters who are WEIRD and OFFPUTTING. maybe even LOUD and UNAFRAID TO TAKE UP SPACE. round of applause. NOW.

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My top Alien Covenant moments are that early section with the Alien in the dropship they completely fumble all attempts to build menace by veering hard into slapstick when she opens the door slips on the bloodstain and I just could not stop laughing the entire rest of the scene. And also that bit where the Prometheus theme plays because I am a sucker for that kinda thing.

Honestly I feel like Covenant really nosedives the second the Aliens actually show up the premise and build was working a bit for me. Like the Prometheus ending having a proto Face Hugger Xenomorph thing didn't not work for me but like you say overexplaining everything so much really cheapens it all. It also just honestly feels a bit of a meanspirited fate to the resolution of Prometheus.

It was low-key a Looney Tunes bit with all the slipping and sliding.

Covenant was much better structured than Prometheus imo and the characters were less frustrating. I was way more engaged and found it overall more well put together than Prometheus. I think that slapping an origin onto what was previously just a terrifying random chance of nature is lame, but that IS the entire premise of the prequels so you can't exactly argue with that. They are what they are!

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LET THE RIGHT ONE IN IS A LEGIT BANGER OF A TITLE. The US remake was already unnecessary but changing it to Let Me In was such a downgrade honestly.

Okay one more - top 5 horror movie titles. Not the movies themselves necessarily just titles you think are sick

Ok omg this was very challenging but in no order:

- it follows

- possessor

- stop motion

- the loved ones

- under the skin

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gonna be a hater for a minute, reblog and put in the tags the last movie that you HATED like viscerally hated like 1/2 star on letterboxd HATED

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for whatever reason tumblr has flagged this post from a deleted blog as explicit so I can't even reblog it anymore which is a shame because it's one of my absolute favorites

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Chopping Mall is an all-timer. And @cameronwolfe was right Late Night with the Devil IS a great title

Disappointed in all of us though (myself included) for the fact that we've made it through 4 people and no one shouted out The Texas Chainsaw Massacre which is I think objectively one of the sickest titles for anything ever

Okay one more - top 5 horror movie titles. Not the movies themselves necessarily just titles you think are sick

Ok omg this was very challenging but in no order:

- it follows

- possessor

- stop motion

- the loved ones

- under the skin

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Sometimes I like to push his ear flat and imagine what he would look like as a downears dog

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BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER | 4.03 "The Harsh Light of Day"

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You know how Alien Covenant has Michael Fassbender make out with another Michael Fassbender? Please list the top five characters and/or actors who should make out with themselves on television.

This is a great fucking question actually. I am going to answer it with two additional metrics: how much I would like it and how much the character would like it, on a scale of 1 - 5

1. Logan Roy (Succession)

-Would he like it? - 3.5 - this would be a higher score if Logan wasn't a homophobe, but I still think he'd find more satisfaction in himself than any other person in his life

-Would I like it? - 1.0 - NO!!!

2. Willow Rosenberg (btvs)

-Would she like it? - 5.0 - honestly this one feels obvious because it genuinely COULD have happened if they weren't cowards. Willows would be into it, even if only vamp!Willow was really loud about it

-Would I like it? - 4.5 - OBVIOUSLY. In addition to being hot I think speeding up Willow's gay awakening by making out with an evil version of herself would be so fucking funny

3. Max Caulfied (Life is Strange)

-Would she like it? - 3.0 - I think Max would enjoy the act of making out with a girl and she probably needs the stress relief anyway, but I can't see her fully enjoying herself because of The Sadness

-Would I like it? - 2.5 - I'm neutral. This doesn't thrill me or repulse me. I remember this becoming a bit of a thing in the fandom after ep5 though and like. I get it.

4. Caitlyn Kiramman (Arcane)

-Would she like it? - 1.5 OR 4.5 - okay I think this depends. She IS a freak, so I think most of the time she could get into it. But in the other hand if this hypothetical scenario happened deep in her s2act2 spiral I think the self loathing would make it harder. It wouldn't stop her but it would make the making out weirder and meaner

-Would I like it? - 4.0 - selfcest generally but with Cait specifically seems to be HUGE in the fanart meta right now. I think it's so funny. Terminal velocity horniness. I also agree that it's hot, but rating higher than a 4.0 would feel like stolen valor compared to the people actively losing their minds about this rn and drawing the horniest art anyone's ever seen

5. Angel (btvs/ats)

Would he like it? - 2.0 - Angel would NOT like it, because he hates himself so much. But I don't think he would FULLY hate it, because he's a little bit bisexual. I think this score could be variable depending on the circumstances - if the selfcest in question is with Angelus it changes the game.

Would I like it? - 2.0 - I also wouldn't personally like this very much but I suggest it as a potential curse loophole - Angel's self loathing is so strong there's no way he'd ever experience a moment of true happiness with himself so it at least puts fucking back on the menu. Also my rating would go up a full point if Buffy was there watching because I think she'd really like that and I like when she gets to enjoy herself.

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Just learned about recency bias, coolest thing ive ever learned about lol

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Listen/purchase: New Radiations by Marissa Nadler

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Sundown Koreatown, Los Angeles -- June 7th, 2025

Etsy

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Grand Cadaver - Into The Maw Of Death

[Death metal / Oct. 29, 2021]

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Don't think I've seen this asked before, so... top five Criminal Minds team members who aren't JJ or Emily. Alternatively, top five unsubs.

1. Penelope - I love her

2. Morgan - he's cool

3. Aisha Tyler's character - I stopped going here by then so I don't know her name but I feel like I'd like the cut of her jib

4. Gideon - grandpa

5. Elle - remember when she killed that guy?

I'm actually going to punt this to @nataliving and @gothprentiss if they feel like it because as is probably apparent by now I am just not a true CriminalmindsHead the way they are