#the app was in the barbie movie too

[ourolite]

I JUST. POSTED SOMETHING. WITH THIS BIRD. JUUUUUST POSTED.

Dear captives.

Hello.

As you all know, I tend to keep people in my basement. Probably not the best thing to do as ive come to grow as a person. Really. I pledge to no longer keep people in my basement. Look, I know its a dick move i'm sorry.

From now on, I will free my captives and no longer hunt you down. Obviously, im not happy about this but I will try. Or like, do it less? Love Stupid green owl.

[ravenatural]

apparently Barbie movie is getting some low reviews for being ‘anti-man’ like my dudes while I can see why you would think that, it’s not anti-man, it’s anti-patriarchy: something that benefits men but hurts them all the same in the set of expectations society holds men to so that they can maintain those benefits

the movie focused heavily on womens struggles under the patriarchy, but they do show the effects on men too, primarily in the form of ryan goslings kens struggles

[hiddenreamers]

Worlds Collide - Lando Norris x neuropsychologist!Reader

SUMMARY: You're a fresh neuropsychologist who is internet-famous for making entertaining and educational videos about anything psychology-related. Lando and you meet for the first time when the two of you are invited to do an episode on a podcast where people from very different professions sit down together and talk about their lives. Considering the instant chemistry, the fans aren't exactly surprised when the dating rumours emerge...

worldscollide_pod tagged landonorris and yn_thebrainiac in a post:

What do a neuropsychologist and a Formula 1 driver have in common? 🧠🏎️ We don't know either! So we invited landonorris and yn_thebrainiac to tell us about their lives.

Listen to Worlds Collide wherever you get your podcasts or watch the episode on our YouTube channel. You can suggest and vote on show guests on our Patron page.

Comments:

user1: i'd say they have brain injury in common??

user2: not the crossover episode we wanted but the one we needed

user3: he's driving fast, she's a failed med student, what's interesting about that?

�� user4: omg please be a joke 😭 or a ragebait ↳ user5: user3 do you realize how much time and effort it takes to be either a f1 driver or a neuropsychologist? ↳ user5: high school dropout ass comment

landonorris: can't wait!

↳ yn_thebrainiac: looking forward to meeting you ❤️ liked by landonorris

user6: he called a rectangle a circle and she uses Latin names for brain parts like it's common knowledge. Truly a collision of worlds lmao

user7: these two in one room?? feels like a fever dream

↳ user8: more like a new Barbie movie

worldscollide_pod tagged landonorris and yn_thebrainiac in a post:

This week on Worlds Collide we have learned that a pit stop is kinda like a therapy appointment, helmets are humanity's best invention and waffles are to your brain what fuel is to a car.

Huge thanks to landonorris and yn_thebrainiac for giving us insight into their exceptional careers as well as two hours of good laughs!

Listen to Worlds Collide wherever you get your podcasts or watch the episode on our YouTube channel. You can suggest and vote on show guests on our Patron page.

Comments:

user9: yn_thebrainiac is the only person to get excited over brain injuries

↳ user10: and landonorris is the only person to make heart eyes while someone is talking about brain injuries

user11: when yn_thebrainiac was explaining her job and said to Lando he should hope he never has to be examined by her he looked so defeated 😭😭 truly a wet cat

↳ user12: and the "I guess I won't wear a helmet anymore"?? bro is down bad from the start

yn_thebrainiac: thank you for the opportunity! landonorris it was great meeting you ❤️ hope to see you again soon liked by landonorris and worldscollide_pod

↳ landonorris: just let me know when and where 🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️

user13: landonorris is that guy who suddenly becomes a comedian whenever a pretty girl is around

↳ user14: but it DID work on yn_thebrainiac 😭😭😭

user15: not yn_thebrainiac answering questions like it's a presidential debate and Lando going idk man I just drive

user16: Lando asking the hosts to repeat the question because he was too focused on yn_thebrainiac? man's not beating the simp allegations anytime soon

user17: that whole episode felt more like a date than a talk show liked by worldscollide_pod

↳ worldscollide_pod: were we more wingmen or a third wheel?

user18: the way both of them were invested in each other's stories made me realize how utterly single I am

↳ user19: when yn_thebrainiac said it's a force of habit to ask how something made him feel and then Lando casually asking her the same thing??? delete Tinder, no dating app will get you a man like this

user20: can I just say how surprised I am with Lando's thoughtfulness? Like when yn_thebrainiac said she's scared to drive after examining an accident victim and he immediately offered to be her driver?

↳ user21: considering the tales of Lando's driving, it will only traumatise her further lol

user22: Lando telling her to continue because he wants to hear the rest of the story when she apologized for getting sidetracked??? 🥺🥺 mom, I want this one!!!!!

user23: they just met and they have more chemistry than some couples who have been married for decades

↳ user24: if Lando was staring at me the way he's staring at yn_thebrainiac I'd be radioactive 📛☢️ ↳ user25: no but really girlies if he doesn't look at you the way Lando's looking at her, he's not the one 🏃‍♀️‍➡️❌

user26: now I kinda want yn_thebrainiac to take up Lando on his offer to test his cognitive skills

↳ user27: if they're in the same room he's going to fail every attention task

user28: Lando's dolphin ass giggle would make you think yn_thebrainiac is the funniest person on Earth

↳ user29: he's just a girl 🎀🎀

user30: I became a fan the moment yn_thebrainiac said "imagine your head is a hairy watermelon with a ball of jello inside"

↳ user31: as a med student I can tell you that it's pretty accurate

gossipgirl_f1 just posted a picture:

🚨🚨🚨McLaren's most eligible bachelor landonorris not eligible anymore? 🚨🚨🚨The driver has been spotted in Japan getting comfortable with an unnamed girl.

user32: didn't yn_thebrainiac post she's there too?

↳ user33: oh god please let it be real ↳ user34: it's definitely her

user35: people out there living my dreams 🥲

user36: why do yall even care?? he's a grown ass man, grow tf up

↳ user37: and yet here you are commenting 😴😴 like what are YOU doing at the devils sacrament?

user38: where's the FBI when you need them we have to knowww

↳ user39: that's yn_thebrainiac she had the exact same outfit in the story she posted earlier

user40: come look girl user41 someones stealing your man

↳ user41: aw hell naw she better know how to fight ↳ user42: wow the delulu is strong with this one

user43: look what yall did worldscollide_pod liked by worldscollide_pod

↳ user43: i guess that's a confirmation huh

landonorris tagged yn_thebrainiac in a post:

Japan treated us nice but she treats me nicer 🌸🇯🇵

Comments:

user44: so they met and fell in love because they were randomly invited to do a random episode of a random podcast? and people still say God ain't real smdh

↳ user45: they better not forget to invite worldscollide_pod to their wedding

user46: guess he'll fuck anyone, when's my turn?

↳ user47: probably never, considering you're no one rather than anyone💁‍♀️💁‍♀️

oscarpiastri: yes, they are as annoyingly in love as they look

↳ landonorris: woww and here I thought we were best friends ↳ landonorris: so rude ↳ oscarpiastri: I have group chat screenshots ↳ landonorris: you're my bestest friend Oscar and you're too nice to ever do this to me 🥰 ↳ maxverstappen1: we all have screenshots ↳ georgerussell63: you're cooked mate ↳ landonorris: 🥲🥲

user48: I would sacrifice my firstborn for this 😭😭

user49: I'm not sure who I am more jealous of

↳ user50: both

user51: they look so good together wtf

user52: worldscollide_pod you guys need to fix your post, what neuropsychologist and a f1 driver have in common is a marriage certificate

user53: ok real question how did he pull her??

↳ user54: he's a millionaire he doesn't have to do anything lol women's ideal type is a loaded wallet ↳ user55: bold of you to assume someone like her needs a walking piggy bank

yn_thebrainiac tagged landonorris in a post:

Hey, did you know that it was a Japanese scholar, Hiroshi Kojima, who popularized phenomenological ontology? He proposed that the dichotomy of individuality vs consciousness could be solved by treating the body as a half-way point between those two concepts. In essence, Kojima suggested considering the body as being seen both from the inside and the outside, now focusing on the intersubjective encounters as part of what constitutes the human being in the context of ontology.

Ps. He promised to wear his helmet! 🌼💖

Comments:

user56: she's everything, he's just Ken😌💅liked by landonorris

↳ georgerussell63: facts

user57: I bet the pillow talk is baffling

↳ landonorris: nah she's too tired for that ↳ user58: 💀💀 bro you didn't have to do her like that

user59: if he breaks your heart I promise to shake his head real hard, repeatedly 🥰🥰

user60: 😬😬 do they not make them pretty anymore?

↳ user61: fr she doesn't deserve him 😐 sad ↳ user62: this relationship feels like a social experiment like what do you mean he chose HER???? Lando Norris settling for a 2/10 is not the news I wanted to read today ↳ user63: wow no wonder yall dads left 😭 she's a normal looking woman, did porn rot your peanut brains completely? go outside and interact with regular, non-photoshopped people and then come back

user64: they have nothing in common and yet they fit perfectly how?? i feel like I'm having a strokee

user65: diagnostic process videos bout to get lit now that there's a volunteer to draw clocks and memorize strings of random words

user66: why do they look like a disney movie couple

↳ maxverstappen1: he may or may not have called her princess on more than one occasion ↳ landonorris: you guys promised 🥲 ↳ oscarpiastri: no, we promised not to post the screenshots ↳ yn_thebrainiac: you mean the screenshots georgerussell63 just sent me? ↳ landonorris: good talk everyone I'll just go die of embarrassment if you don't mind ↳ yn_thebrainiac: I thought the things you said about me were kind of cute ↳ landonorris: nvm I'm back to life

[mrsbarnesblog]

Bucky Barnes Masterlist

ko-fi ao3

⭐️ - personal favorite

❤️‍🔥 - smut

🩷 - fluff

🖤 - angst

⭐️❤️‍🔥Jersey - College! Bucky Barnes x Reader

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Bucky fucks you while your parents sleep in the next room. (1.6k)

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You really need to calm down, so you get under Bucky's table while he's playing with his friends. (1.4k)

🩷Sandcastles - CEO! Husband! Bucky Barnes x Reader

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❤️‍🔥 New purchase - Mob! Bucky Barnes x Reader

You just got a new expensive lingerie set and decided to tease your mafia boss boyfriend with some sexy pictures. (2.3k)

⭐️❤️‍🔥 Firewood - Lumberjack! Bucky Barnes x Reader

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🩷 I can't let you get hurt - Brother's best friend! Bucky Barnes x Reader

You have just moved to New York, where your adopted brother Steve has been living for 5 years. Desperate to make new friends, you give the dating app another go. You didn’t even think that you would have to ask for help from the person who has not left your thoughts for the past month - your brother’s best friend. (3.3k)

❤️‍🔥 Don't hide - Mechanic! Bucky Barnes x Reader

Somehow you ended up in a storage room with one of your dad's mechanics. (1.8k)

🩷 My everything - Avenger! Bucky Barnes x Reader

The last thing that Bucky ever expected to see was the love of his life from the past trapped in one of the Hydra bunkers in the cryofreeze chamber. Yet here he was almost two days later, staring at your still unconscious body through the window at the medical wing, imagining the horror and disgust on your face when you found out that he was no longer the innocent and happy boy you knew before. (6.8k)

⭐️🩷Personal pillow - Avenger! Bucky Barnes x Reader

You confront avengers when they start teasing Bucky about being too soft. (1.6k)

⭐️🩷 I trust you - Avenger! Bucky Barnes x Reader

When Bucky comes back from a mission with a knife wound there is only one person who can convince him to get help. (3.5k)

⭐️🩷 You deserve the world - College! Bucky Barnes x Reader

You were in a relationship with a man who had never truly cared about you, but after catching him cheating on you at a friend's party, you eventually decided to end things with him. The good news was that there was always someone who wasn't going to let you go through it alone. (4.6k)

🩷 Barbie - Avenger! Bucky Barnes x Reader

Bucky takes his best girl to watch a Barbie movie and then spoils her with gifts. (1.3k)

❤️‍🔥 Wakanda - Avenger! Bucky Barnes x Avenger! Reader

You visit Bucky in Wakanda, and the hidden feelings are finally coming out. (2.7k)

Requests

We could've done it earlier - Avenger! Bucky Barnes x Reader

When one of the new recruits started following you around and being too persistent, Bucky decided to help you by kissing you right in front of that guy. Though he didn't realize that he wouldn't be able to stop. (2.3k)

Night - Avenger! Bucky Barnes x Reader

You wandered around the Tower at night because you couldn't sleep. In the common room, you find Bucky sitting in the dark and decide to share an ice cream pint with him.

Snowman - Avenger! Bucky Barnes x Reader

When the first snow of the year had just covered the whole of New York City, you tried to convince Bucky to play outside with you. He couldn't find the power in himself to say no to you, even if it's his least favorite time of the year.

[primaviva]

PAIRINGS: gwen, miles (42!), hobie, pav, and miguel x fem! reader

SYNOPSIS: astv characters and their s/o going to see barbie.

WARNING/NOTES: matching outfits, the mention of o-o-oppenheimer 🤢🤮, barbie photo ops, miguel being a mamón

— GWEN

i hate to say it so… but she wanted to watch oppenheimer first.

she sent you a text talking about sum “babe let’s see oppenheimer it looks good 🥰” and then you sent her a voice memo of gun shots from your gun sound simulator app and she understood she was wrong.

gwen thinks father of the atomic

it’s not like she didn’t wanna see barbie but she was like… it’s barbie

“babe cmon! you can’t tell me oppenheimer doesn’t look cool. what is barbie even about? is she gonna go on an adventure to find that old rubber high heel the little girl that owns her lost those many years ago? oooo so interesting.”

“do not mock me gwendolyn.”

you showed her the trailer as gwen showed you the oppenheimer trailer

in the end you both lost.

yeah… oppenheimer is a glorification a historical event that people don’t touch on the affects it had and rather the men behind it

and yeah… barbie having an existential crisis on what it means to be a woman and her place in the world sounded like it had potential

“i mean, yeah the trailer is kinda fire,” you admitted, weak in defeat.

gwen crossed her arms with a smirk of victory. “see! i told you that it looked cool,” she rubbed in your face before changing her expression, “but… barbie also sounds like it’s gonna be good. who says we can’t do both?”

you guys do barbieheimer.

and since you both were already gonna indulge in the internet craze… of course you played into it

gwen dressed in all black in this tux and even got the hat to match

you on the other hand wore all pink in tribute to barbie

she was FAWNING over you.

the cute outfit? the accessories? you in general?

you also couldn’t lie with how attractive gwen looked in a blazer I MEANNNN

she wore a bunch of rings on her hands and had a tie and all but she made it looser and looser until she just took it off and shoved it in her pocket before y’all left because it was annoying the shit out of her

“oh my you look so dapper,” you complimented, fighting back laughs from your choice of wording.

you watched as she smoothed down the blazer, shocked that she even had that in her closet. it was weird seeing her dressed like that and you couldn’t help but try to not look. it would be a bad night if she caught you peeking because yeah, you know she’s fine, but do you want her knowing that? to use that against you as leverage? hell. no.

gwen let out a laugh as she striked a pose, hands on her hips moving the sides of the blazer behind her to show off black waistcoat top. “really? you flatter me. aren’t you the bees knees yourself, babe.”

you cringed. hard.

her attempt at 1940 slang was where you drew the line and her shit eating grin didn’t help.

“gwen… dare i say gwendolyn again.”

she smirked. “yes, sugar lips?”

“i hate you.”

gwen was clearly feeling herself

you were too

and trust there was a photoshoot. and trust that it was gwen’s idea even if it was mostly her taking photos of you and her hyping you up crazy

“you’re gonna be the prettiest there babe. nobody can top my girl! not even barbie-”

“don’t be corny with me please…”

you guys decided to watch oppenheimer first and then end on a happy note with barbie

throughout oppenheimer you could see… even FEEL gwen’s eyes staring at the side of your head

she was just making sure you at least enjoyed the movie because it would break her soul if she forced you to watch something you didn’t like

you guys ended up loving it, especially the bomb scene

then you guys watched barbie…

it was a lot of laughing but the moment the movie started taking its turn bro gwen was fighting tears

and at the end of it? BALLING HER EYES OUT

if you are crying you both are just looking at each other in utter shock at the movie but also doing a really poor job at hugging each other

if you aren’t crying your eyes out with her you are comforting her while kinda laughing at her because she thought it was just gonna be some pink glam movie

it wasn’t.

“t-the message… this is so embarrassing i can’t stop crying what the fuck,” she cried into her palms which made her sound really funny as it was muffled by her skin.

you just held her close and you guys talked about the movies

especially like talking about the symbolism in barbie and how it touched on women suffering from the system and standards they are forced to live up to like it really hit gwen especially because the hate she got for how she acted in astv and how nobody was coming at the males that did the same or even worse than her

she sends you tiktok edits of gloria x barbie and says “us❤️”

overall, it was a 10/10 experience y’all went out to eat after in your cute outfits n all

— MILES

you asked him and miles was down IMMEDIATELY

he was another that thought oppenheimer looked good but he didn’t really mention going to the movie with you and the same thing for barbie

miles just thought they was both cool lookin

so you asked him.

“miles, baby, i have a very important question to ask you… one that may very well determine the outcome of this relationship.”

you spoke stern and serious, and almost vague.

"yeah, what's up? something wrong?" miles asks, slightly concerned, running his fingers through his curls and looking up at you.

“will you watch the barbie movie with me?” you pleaded with your hands, “pleaseee!”

miles eyes go wide, a smile spreading across his face.

"yes! i'm so down! i'll even be your ken if you wanna be my barbie. you know i'm a sucker for anything barbie."

you laughed, moving over to sit in his lap. he wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you in closer. “my ken, huh? i like the idea of that.”

“i mean, what else would i be? i’m here to serve you,” he spoke with a slight blush painted on his cheeks. you giggled as you wrapped your arms around his neck.

“we should do those matching couple outfits for barbie,” you suggested, “wouldn’t we look so cute?”

"matching outfits?" he asks thoughtfully. "y’know what, i think i know the perfect idea for our couple's look, babe."

miles had this glow to him as you literally saw a light bulb go off in his head.

“oh really, you have an idea?” you questioned, furrowing your brows at the speed of whatever little brain storm was going on in his head. “is it boricua barbie? because not gonna lie, i’d love to see you in a dress.”

"hmm, you wanna see me in a pink, ruffly dress?" miles teases you, smiling at the idea. "why didn't you tell me you were into cute boys in feminine outfits sooner, babe? cus’ i’d dress up for you whenever you want."

“you play too much,” choked out through the giggles as you shoved his shoulder. "hey now, i look amazing in a dress," he laughs. "but i do have an idea that includes both matching barbie costumes and me being your ken, if you're up for it."

miles smiles sweetly at you, his expression turning a little mischievous. “if you have an idea, please do tell,” you said in a sultry voice.

"i want to do what barbie and ken did in that one movie, where ken turns out to actually have superpowers too," miles explains excitedly. "but instead of us being the same superhero, like we both have super strength or super speed, we could be superheroes who complement each other."

you laughed im disbelief. ‘no way’ you thought, knowing exactly what he was thinking of.

he takes your hand, placing the other one on your cheeks and staring deeply into your eyes as he smiles at you. "what do you think?" miles whispers, leaning down toward you.

“you wanna be barbie and ken… from barbie princess power,” you recited slowly, a grin stretching across your face. “of course the one who is a superhero vigilante says this.”

miles' smile widens. "yes, princess power! that's exactly what i was talkin’ about," he says. "and come on, don't underestimate the barbie movies. most of them are really good, dare i say cinematic masterpieces!”

you mouthed an ‘okay’ as you rolled your eyes.

"if i'm your ken, you have to be my barbie," he says, moving his hands onto your waist and moving you up his lap. "the most iconic couple in the barbie universe, right here."

y’all outfits looked so funny but cute… like in a diy that didn’t go wrong typa way

and if you think for a minute mamita rio let y’all go without them facebook mom photos you’re sadly mistaken

"sonríe pa la foto!" rio yelled as the flash coming from her phone was almost blinding.

“mami, por favor-”

miles begging was not gonna get him anywhere with his mom.

“dios mío, you both look so cute,” rio gushed.

“señora morales…you’re too kind!”

miles dad gave you both the typical “y’all better not get into no trouble” parent speech and then you both was off

when i say he was fangirling over the barbie themed cups and popcorn… i mean it

he was taking photos of everything

the whole movie his mouth was wide open in awe

miles was actually so furious at ken he looked absolutely lost and physically upset watching that white piece of plastic run a muck in barbieland

“HE TALKIN’ TO BARBIE LIKE THAT??”

yes, he cried at the end… and at the middle… and a little at the start

at first he was just amazed with the cinematography

but then when they got to the real world? just seeing through the movies lens and it’s take on how modern society treats women based on the parallel barbie world like he felt so unreal

at the end, he was acting like those guys on tiktok that was treating the women in they lives like absolute QUEENS walking out the theater because of the perspective they got watching the movie

not that he didn’t treat you like that before, don’t get him wrong, it’s just that he felt the need like a bunch of other guys after watching the movie to apologizes for the system men have created

it was a little funny, especially because it has nothing to do with him and men doing this type of stuff is a little corny coming from the privilege of the gender, but you appreciated it nonetheless

if you cried during the movie tho? he is bear hugging you crazy and not letting go even after the barbie world credits end

you guys leave the theater holding hands and talking about the film and he is geeking out over all the symbolism and stuff this man watches titanic you know he’s a secret film bro

“i’m so sorry mi amor, that us men have failed our women-”

and there miles went, on a nonstop rant about how you are his queen and how much he loves the women in his life.

you ended up sleeping over at his place

with the door open of course… you know rio is watching.

he had so much fun with you tonight and you could tell by the way he slept with a big smile displayed on his face.

— PAVITR

you asked him and he was happily accepting before you even got the question fully out.

“pav!” you called out from behind him, pulling him in from the neck for a hug. “hey, i wanna ask you something. do you wanna-”

“yes.”

“wait… what? pav i didn’t even say anything yet? what if i’m about to say something completely criminal?” you asked in a teasing tone.

“hehe, yeah maybe i’m a little too excited to see you. what is it, love?”

his eyes looked at you so bright and full of love, it was almost distracting.

“can we go see the barbie movie? we can even wear all pink and match…”

you were gonna say more, but you didn’t have to.

pav was immediately saying yes to everything

until the fear sunk in…

"wait, but I don't have anything pink to wear!" pavitr exclaimed, sounding slightly distressed. "does that mean you won't go with me?" he asked, raising an eyebrow and giving you a teasing smile.

he knows you’d never do such a thing.

"you know, i don't usually dress in pink, but for you i'll make an exception!"

you suggested you both go shopping like a little couples date

it was chaotic to say the least… but just as fun !!

he was acting like a model with everything he put on and it got even worse when you let him look at the stuff you were putting on

absolutely whipped.

“my girlfriend is gorgeous! absolutely gorgeous!”

you thanked him again, and again, and again.

“pav, do you think you are india’s next top model? because you are not gaytari,” you teased for him not finding an outfit yet, landing a peck on his cheek as he giggled in response.

"i'II look my best for the movie," he added with a wink. "are you sure you can handle all this style?"

all you could do was roll your eyes.

y’all were almost late to the movie because of bro

but you weren’t.

for the movie he was similar to miles and just in awe

in the beginning he was rooting for ken because he thought he was just being a good service boyfriend

you can imagine pavitr heartbreak when he started talking about the patriarchy

“no, wait- KEN WHAT ARE YOU DOING I WAS ROOTING FOR YOU!”

man is anger sobbing

words cannot describe the physical anger he feels seeing ken talk to barbie in such a manner he was stunned at the switch up

he also loved all of ruth’s parts, thinks she carried the whole movie

was physically leaning backwards at the sad scenes just taking it all in

pavitr LOVED the movie

came out the theater a changed man.

“my amazing, sweetest, most caring girlfriend…the prettiest of all mumbattan,” he spoke as he got down on one leg.

‘oh boy’ you thought, preparing yourself.

“i promise you, i would never ever treat you like how ken did barbie. you are a breathtaking woman and deserve the world-”

there goes another speech.

he walked you home like a true gentleman he smoking that ken pack and y’all talked about your favorite parts

pavitr overall had a really good time with you and enjoyed the message of the movie

— HOBIE

hobie is not and i repeat NOT watching that atomic bomb glorification story

but a movie about the patriarchy and double standard against women that hurts both genders based on the system men built through a satire film that is actually very political and has a message? yeah he’s going

when you told him tho not gonna lie he was gonna clown you

“barbie? like that lil white girl… you sure you wanna go watch that, luv?”

once you told him about the plot and showed him the trailer bro was READY to go

the set up of barbie world being a parallel to modern society was music to his ears

“really? i didn’t really expect allat comin’ from that bird. ight then, i’ll go. now i'm kinda curious.”

yes, he dresses up with you.

hobie is a punk icon… you know gender does not define him and he doesn’t care about breaking the “rules” of fashion of bit

so what does he dress as?

erika from rock n royals barbie.

guitar included.

you? well it’s a couple costume YOU'RE GONNA BE HIS COURTNEY

it’s not like you guys wore an exact replica of the outfits it was just heavily inspired fits

y’all looked cute as hell tho trust

“hobie, i can feel you staring,” you told him as you fixed up your makeup in your mirror.

it was true, you could feel him staring at you. heavy.

you looked to the side of your mirror and indeed saw him eyeing your figure with a soft smirk as he leaned against your bed frame. “what, not allowed to look at my girl now? since when?”

he was teasing and he knew it was making you flustered just by how your face was heating up.

his outfit isn’t too far out of bounds of what we would normally wear, but you couldn’t lie and say that the new colors didn’t fit him. the purple and the blue accents of his outfit, the leather jacket, the black eyeshadow with glitter that he surprisingly let you do, just everything about him looked so good.

hobie walked up behind you and put his hands on your hips, guiding your body closer to his as he watched your hands freeze applying your lip liner.

“don’t stop cus’ of me,” he spoke sheepishly.

you continued and shortly after finished up. his eyes still stared silently at you, admiring your beauty. “looking again, hobie? y’know i hope you pay attention to this movie…”

“i am,” he admitted with no shame, “you’re the prettiest gal i’ve seen. not gonna deny that.”

he pressed a slow, open mouth kiss on your shoulder as he rested his head in the crook of your neck. his breath was warm against your chilled skin.

“shall we get goin’ now?”

he payed attention to the movie but he couldn’t help wrapping a arm around your shoulder and making little comments in your ear

hobie got quiet tho towards the middle because he genuinely got invested once her feet turned flat and barbie met the ceo

but once the movie started getting deep… BOYY the look on this mans face he was stunned, appalled, baffled, gobsmacked even at ken

and then the speech about women? lawd.

he didn’t cry at all during the final sequence and if anything i think he was confused…

“wait that’s the lady from before that was makin tea, innit?”

“yes hobie.”

“holdup, where the granny go? what’s with the white void?”

“HOBIE-”

don’t get it twisted tho he understood the film and thought it was beautifully done

y’all talked about all the topics afterwards and let’s just say bro hates kens and is angry that nobody told them shit

“are they mad? they must be cus’ no way after everything that happened they just gon forgive the man for being a raging misogynist… they had the girls wearing maid costumes and not one apology was heard man that’s insane!”

hobie smoking that ken pack

he enjoyed the movie but what made him enjoy it was doing it with you <33

— MIGUEL

you know you had to ask him.

bro was not considering anything that would take him away from his work or distract him because he feels he doesn’t have time for that

and the crazy thing is that miguel knows about the hype about the movie and the whole barbie core pink mania

but of course he gonna act like he don’t and got better things to do.

“do you wanna see the barbie movie with me?”

those the words that stopped the gears turning in his head.

“excuse me?” miguel asked, looking up from his report with furrowed brows as his forehead already began to crease.

you wanted to dwell on the fact that he is getting annoyed before you even got to explain yourself, but you pushed it to the back of your mind. no, you couldn’t let him get push you away this time.

“you heard me, miguel. c’mon, the movie with margot robbie! and did i mention barbie? one of the most popular dolls? don’t act stupid,” you told him, walking over and wrapping your arms around his neck to hug him close from behind as he sat. “you don’t think it would be fun?”

he pinches the bridge of his nose, knowing what you’re about to get him into.

“mi vida…” you hear him sigh, quietly in almost a cut-it-out type of tone. he moves his head to the side and you can practically feel the confusion behind the glare. “you’re joking.”

you move one of your hands to your heart. “miguel!” you gasped playful, “this is a serious matter. why would i even joke about watching a movie with you?”

“because there's no way you're being serious. you don't go looking for me to see a barbie movie. especially one you know i'll refuse,” he replies, his voice stern.

“but-”

"Is this some sort of elaborate humiliation attempt?"

“NO!”

"... you're serious, aren't you? what's in it for me? i mean, it's a barbie movie."

you explain to him the premise and he still acts like this whole thing is stupid and you have no business trying to see this movie with him

but he can’t lie, he’s intrigued.

he kinda wants to see it.

and he’s trying his best to hide it.

"okay… what time?" he asked, defeated.

“really, my begging actually worked? thank god because i already brought two tickets and it would’ve been sad showing up alone,” you confessed.

“you bought them? already?” he repeated, caught off guard by how ready you were. “and what time are they for?"

“7:30.”

“fine, fine. but i'm holding you to your word. If it turns out this is some kind of elaborate scheme, you'll be hearing about it."

he’s so suspicious for no reason

now when it came to outfits… yeah you know miguel owns no pink whatsoever

you didn’t even know he knew about the pink craze or even wanted to play into it until he let it slip

"what am i supposed to wear then? i don't own anything pink.”

“it’s fine we’ll go shoppin- wait who said anything about pink outfits to you?”

you started making fun of him but then he threatened to take back saying he was going with you and told you that you’d be sitting in a theater all by yourself

but then you brought up again how he was ready to wear pink for you and he had a little slip up

"n-no? i mean, I could… if i’m gonna go see this thing with you and it your way, might as well commit right?”

his facade was slipping, this was golden. “so you will wear pink?”

the mischievous look on your face made him annoyed but he knew what he was getting into.

“i said i could, not that i’m going to. don’t get your hopes up chiquita."

he did end up wearing pink

little said he know you were plotting something against him

it started off nice… simple.

it was white pants with a pink button up

you told him for a “pop of color” he should wear a green blazer

sound familiar? because you were planning a scheme YOU DRESSED HIM AS SUGAR DADDY KEN

it was for shits and giggles

he had no idea until it was all paid for and safe to tell him before miguel made you fix his outfit

he’s ore than a little surprised, and not really sure how to react. miguel takes a look at the outfit, and does his best to try and hold back a chuckle.

"this... is a joke. there's no way you're serious about me wearing this, is there?”

“put. it. on.”

he does a low sighs and take the outfit from you. "fine, only because it's you."

it didn’t take him long to finish in the changing room, and when he stepped out you were enchanted by the sight.

“happy?”

yes. indeed you were very happy.

he was paying for everything of course like the sugar daddy he doesn’t know he is

he had his arms crossed, sat down legs spread, watching you change into different pink outfits and rating telling you how he thought you looked

you’d do little spins for miguel

“muy bella.” “you look gorgeous.” “i like that one, fits you nicely.”

you ended up leaving and going to the movie and while on your way there decided to tell him about his little outfit.

“you wanna know a secret, miggy?” you ask him with a grin.

he raises a brown at you, “i feel like you're gonna tell me regardless, so i'm gonna say yes.”

you say nothing, you just pull up a photo of sugar daddy ken and show it to him.

as his eyes flicker to the screen, you see the light amusement fade away from his expression as it turns to one of genuine confusion and horror. miguel’s hand moves subconsciously to the green blazer, as the fear sets in that he recognizes exactly what the outfit is referring to. “you didn’t…”

“but i did.”

“you. you are a bad person.”

truth be told, he really liked the movie

miguel just really liked the message like it made it him think of all the women that were and are in his life like you and all the other girls he’s wronged before you iykyk

but it also made him sad because it reminded him of gabriella

just thinking about all the muñequitas she use to play with before it happens

all the dress up games they use to play, when he pretended to be whatever doll he picked for her to play pretend scenarios with her dream house

it also made him sad to think of the strong, independent woman she wouldn’t become if it wasn’t for him

he didn’t tear up, no not at all.

but by the empty look on his face you could tell just how he was feeling

you put a hand over his as the audience laughed at the screen. “miguel, you okay? you know we can leave if that’s what you want.”

he just turned, put his hand over yours and gave it a squeeze. “no, no… i’m fine. don't worry.”

you guys had a good time and you swore you could see a small smile stretch across his face during some moments

he genuinely wanted to talk about the movie with you for hours but the man does have to sleep at some point

“hey, i just wanted to thank you for uh… convincing me to see a barbie movie. yeah, it sounded ridiculous and thought you were trying to find some way to mess with me for my attention. but, i really did enjoy spending time with you. just felt compelled to tell you that is all.”

miguel holds his heavy responsibility of the universe on his shoulders and is filled with grief

he doesn’t do this with the intent to tell people how to live their lives, but to try and protect what he couldn’t

so yeah, he’s glad you could give him some relief from the day

A/N: hey guys… i feel it’s been a minute but this took so long and it’s my first time writing for all of them beside gwen so im scared it’s gonna sound like shit so ??? i hope y’all enjoyed tho 🫶 BARBIE WAS SO GOOD

© 2023 primaviva — artist credits: zvdohu

[nico-di-genova]

“I don’t like Alexander Rossi at all,” I say, as I trip and thousands of ‘Rossi Off Track Lore’ screenshots from my notes app spill out of my jacket pocket. Anyway, here’s more about the freak :)

Got into cycling because he went on a cycling trip with a group of “guys and their wives” (Kelly was not with him) in 2023. He said he was motivated to get into it because everytime you think you’re good, someone would come by ten times better than you. Competitive Rossi and his competitive tendencies, no surprise there. Tim joked he was going to sell his plane now, since biking was going to become the new thing, and Alex was like “no, I need the plane to get me to places where I’ll be biking.” James teased that this was going to become his new hyperfixation and Alex was like “yeah.” We love a self aware king :).

Immediately bought $300 bike shorts and an anti chafing cream called “deez nuts” because he thought it was funny. James wanted details on where and how it’s applied - feels self explanatory Jimbo, but you can be a freak on the pod if you want I guess. Freak 4 freak behavior.

Frequently does not check his texts and emails. Well, actually, he does. But if it’s an email he doesn’t want to respond to, he will not open it so that way in his mind it is unread - same with texts.

Just this whole bit of convo between Alex and James, it’s not lore, I just think it speaks to their dynamic:

They barbenheimer’d or as James called it “oppenbarbied” because they opened with Oppenheimer and closed with Barbie. Who is they you might ask? Why, James, Alex, and Kelly of course - because they are obviously glued at the hip. Alex didn’t want to see Barbie at all, described it as horrifying (he describes a lot of things he doesn’t like as horrifying, like things that ick him out or piss him off are little jumpscares in his life), because he is a loser and lame. James said they had time to do it, Alex said they didn’t, James corrected “we made time” - making time to go to the movies with your best friend and his fiance he’s secretly already married to, ain’t that what life’s all about.

“Kelly and Becky talk more than you and I do about the stuff you and I do” - James about how his and Alex’s wives are intimately involved in their friendship.

Alex loved Oppenheimer. And lowkey outed himself as a “historian”. You know how kids get hyperfixated on specific historical events growing up? This one might have been his, very conceivable and real possibility. He was very passionate about Oppenheimer. Also called the cast “characters” before he corrected and was like “well they’re real people”. He’s also called his fellow drivers on 100 Days to Indy “characters”. Anyway, all this to say, this was basically him:

They did not like Barbie. Alex didn’t think it was cleverly done, thought it was too obvious (he’s not wrong, but maybe he was not the one to speak on it). He said he, “asked James three times if (they) could leave.” Someone tell Alexander he still has free will, I think he’s tied himself too closely to his people and forgotten. You’re not on a leash bud, just go outside 😭.

[symp4nat]

"Don't... I swear."

taylor swift x reader

authors note: okay we got this .... js finished writing this its 11 pm and im so sleepy, swim started playing bc my youtube is glitchy and now im wide awake

summary -defending tay from the golden globes thing

The second you heard the stupid, bald man start to speak, you knew shit would go down. Jo Koy had the fucking audacity to comment on the Barbie movie, which was meaningful and touching. A bald, white man commented on it. No one was surpised.

You were talking with Ryan after the show, just discussing little moments when you felt an arm being wrapped around you. You leaned into the mystery person's arms, although you fully knew it was your girlfriend, based off the smell.

"Hey, stink, wanna go home? Or you wanna go to the after party," you asked.

Your girlfriend sighed and said, "Please..."

-

On the quiet ride home, your girlfriend's hand clutched yours with her head leaning onto your shoulder and your head on hers. She then opened her mouth and said, "Sel told me that these two of our friends hooked up."

You hummed in response. "Oh yeah? Who?" She shrugged, "I'll tell you at home."

Your eyes examined her face. "Are you upset about the Jo Koy thing?"

Her eyes looked at the floor. "He's stupid, we know that, right?" She shrugged and your heart broke into pieces. You then tried to distract her from what was on her mind. "I saw a few videos of you drinking something, was it good? What was it? It'd assume it was wine, was it white or red," you practically interrogated.

When she didn't respond, you decided to grab your phone out. You pulled up the Instagram app and posted a picture of outside the window and captioned it, "u guys were lowk mean to tay tonight, she doesnt deserve any of that, so dont, i swear... yall better fix it 🖕<3"

You then posted it on your story, hoping that the message for across, don't mess with Your Tay, you'd kill them. The car stopped and you opened the door for your girlfriend. Once she had entered the house, you locked the door as she collapsed on the couch. "Go rest, I'll take off your make up soon, promise," you whispered.

"I love you, princess," she said quietly.

"I love you too, Tay," you said as you went to put her blanket into the dryer for added comfort.

[jackawful]

I am absolutely losing it over the redboxcaplypse. Company goes under, leaves millions of paying customers without media they bought on their app, but leaves up physical rental boxes and loses their payment processor so the boxes will just spit out physical media for free. So hypothetically someone can have lost all the shit they bought from redbox on the app but get back roughly an equivalent in physical media if they can find a kiosk that still has power.

Absolutely goofy. Unrelated but I got a copy of the barbie movie for free last night and you can too!

[444you]

ways i maintain a cozy life 🦋

i hope you guys can find something in this post that could be helpful(:

heating blankets

provides me so much comfort & warmth. i have it on the entire day 😭 either on low or high, no inbetween

music

i personalized made my own playlist, i put the most whimsical and feminine music i could find. i recommend to listening to comforting songs as well, but not the ones that make you feel a bit sad

baking

always at my happiest when i bake

comfort shows

the shows i tend to watch are pretty little liars, girlfriends, desperate housewives, gossip girl, the vampire diaries, bad girls club, sex and the city

however sometimes the drama can get to me, if it’s too much. i forget i’m not in the show sometimes. for those moments, i’ll put shows like h2o, the summer i turned pretty, barbie life in the dreamhouse, and new girl on.

showers before sleep

i feel so relaxed in water. this includes swimming, showers, beach, pools, and etc. it provides me a great amount of comfort and sleepiness. this helps me sleep better than usual

taco bell

isn’t always the healthiest but if i need some comfort or i’m just feel down, i’ll get a cravings box from taco bell

visuals

put things in ur room that make you feel at peace especially if you’re a homebody. this is important if you spend most of your time in your room. for me, i always loved baking as i previously mentioned. so i’d get a diffuser with gourmet scents. fairy lights as well. cheetah print blankets.

rain

whenever it rains i’ll sit on the patio, put my headphones on and listen to music to recharge.

nostalgia apps

i tend to lead to games or apps that give me nostalgia. this includes wattpad, tumblr, moviestarplanet, purple place (they got in the app store 🫶🏾) , roblox, or episode. 

public places

when it comes to going to the grocery store, mall, or coffee shop. i’ll go alone especially because i spend my time in my room. when the noise is too much, i’ll put my shows or music on. however, i try to go on a movie date with my friend atleast once or twice a month.

reminders

i’m a very optimistic person but i’m also very sensitive. when i encounter negative people or situations, i tend to get discouraged easily. i solve that by watching “hopecore” or “humans are cute” videos on tiktok. i always try not to feed into my sadness by looking at videos about being mistreated or an ex. i search for videos that talk about having a big heart is a gift. how the right one will come to me. honestly for any situation you’re in.

just dance

y’all don’t come for me. just dance is my holy grail. it’s fun and its my way of doing “cardio”

naps

i try to nap after work or classes before i tend to get low energy. i don’t nap more than 2 hours, that way i feel more refreshed instead of drained.

[theultimatekamehamehavoc]

Spoiler Blather Ahead So Be Warned! I personally feel the tragedy would lowkey strip a part of Makoto's identity/make him grow out of this part of himself faster than he would if the tragedy didn't happen. Basically, Makoto mentions how he's a trend follower. His interests are dictated by what's popular. However, with the tragedy, he would be physically incapable of being in tune with the times. As the Ultimate Hope, Makoto would be quite busy. Sure, maybe he could keep up with a few things going on in the world, but he's already far behind by the time he becomes the Ultimate Hope. All of the survivors are. Due to their memories being wiped, they dunno until they are basically face to face with the Mastermind that a year has already passed and they have forgotten that part of their lives. So, they're all be out of the loop both in the state of the world AND whatever hip thing's popular. Furthermore, as time progresses, they all will be busy, having minimal time to keep up with the kids! They got work to do. Not to say that all of them would be out of touch millennials. For Byakuya, I feel he would be very in tuned with the stocks and the state of both Japan and the world. He would already have no interest in the trends of the common people. Not saying he wouldn't learn some stuff from the others but he'd just be that guy that the others would have to explain this new commoner stuff too. There's Kyoko who doesn't care for trends either though being more in the loop than Byakuya. Since she's a detective, being informed of current events would be helpful. Say there was a new app on phones that was shrouded in controversy. By knowing of it's existence, it'd be an aid for any potential cases with it. Kyoko's got good foresight and all. She would by no means be an expert with the trends of course, she too being busy with other tasks, but she'd at least know some info. Meanwhile, I feel Aoi would be in tuned with some stuff but not all. I can see her really being in tuned with swimming related stuff, it being her Ultimate and all and something I don't think she'd drop. So, she'd be the one to update the others on sports news and content. Meanwhile, Hiro is the type I feel would be clueless regardless but also somehow know current trends perhaps via predictions or by chance. Then there's Toko as well who I feel would be a bit more in with the times with her writing, knowing what's in but also staying in her lane. So, she wouldn't know the latest game the kids are obsessed with but she'd know the current books that are out or who the newest rising authors are. For Makoto though, I feel that, once he has time to understand what's going on, he'd be lost a bit on what's trendy. Not saying he wouldn't know anything or wouldn't participate. I feel that he'd be the type of guy who'd go watch Barbie and Oppenheimer for instance but he'd have to be updated a bit since he's a busy man now and can't fully dedicate his time to seeing what's in and what's out. He's not an unemployed teen; he's the Headmaster of Hopes Peak! Though, I feel that he'd be a bit updated on stuff due to the students but still a tad confused simultaneously. Some specific ways I feel he'd turn out during this stage of his life are the following: A) Makoto likes what was popular back in the early 2000's-2010s maybe due to nostalgia, coping, or just out of familiarity. B) He learns of new media, gaining a new sense of taste, maybe becoming akin to new songs and movies from the other survivors or from his students like learning about Vocaloid, indie Internet shows, and kpop. C) He actually becomes akin to new stuff going on (it's just in his genes to be a trend follower) and abandons the old content. D) A mix of the A) and B) where he ends up liking a mix of things, Makoto still liking old content from the 2000's era he remembers enjoying and liking the newer media. This isn't a definitive thought though and I would be happy to see others interpretations on this concept!!! An older Makoto and company would navigate the world, trying their best!

[wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee28374728]

Until Dawn character hcs

Sam:

Her music taste is crazy. Like the same playlist could have Beethoven, Iron Maiden, The BeeGees and Taylor Swift

Does aerobics in her pajamas

Doesn't know how to order at Starbucks (she just wanted a medium)

Had a dog walking business in high school

Knows how to surf

Will absolutely destroy you in most strategy based board games

Favorite holiday is Halloween

Chris:

Dog person AND cat dad

Far sighted

Huge history nerd, had a ww2 phase in high school that never completely went away

Guy at a camping trip who tells the ghost story that leads up to a joke

Knows exactly what to do when a woman is on her period

Nervous fidgets; bouncing leg, tapping on desk/table, etc

Knew where everything was in his school backpack at all times

Ashley:

Say it with me people: Only. Fucking. Child.

Will get mad at you for saying pumpkin spice latte is basic

Was a horse girl in middle school

Owns more scented candles than a bath and body works

Has gotten her fortune told at a carnival and taken it pretty seriously

Had braces

Smokes weed

Mike:

Track and field

Can't find the clit

Paid other people to do his homework

Wanted to be a firefighter when he was 6

Shockingly scared of bugs, used to make Emily kill them for him, but Jess won't do it

Can swim but doesn't like it

Was really close with Sam when they were younger, Sam is the one who introduced him to the group.

Jessica:

Used to be much happier and more chill before puberty, after which she felt pressure to live up to her looks

Her and Emily used to be super close and she misses it

Was a Frozen kid and still watches it a lot

Most definitely bi curious at least(Emily to blame)

Reads her horoscope but doesn't actually take it seriously

Emily:

Wayyyy to much Disney Channel in her early childhood, now loves drama

The middle of many siblings, acts the way she does for more attention

Was vegetarian at some point

Secretly misses being close with Jess, but makes sure no one knows

Needs rain sounds to sleep

Really wants Matt to stand up to her, this is why she's so hard on him

Matt:

Easily confused when women aren't completely direct

Probably smoked weed at least once, but quit doing it when he started doing sports

Nervous around babies(so small what if he panicked and dropped them)

Had an earring in one ear at one point, but his parents had him take it out and now the piercing is healed over

Can't tell the difference between nail polish shades

Josh:

Would fight god in the Denny's parking lot for someone if they gave him a hug

His bedroom/college dorm is covered in so many movie and band posters you can't see the wall anymore

Talks to cats like they're people

Confused rich(wait his is the only family with six cars??)

Jokes about sex and women, but if he saw a girl being taken advantage of he's gonna slap a frat bro

Owns a VHS tape player

Friggin s l e e p s in checkered shirts

Hannah:

Plant mom

Inspirational quotes on the wall

Best party is a book and a blanket

Nature documentaries

Josh's partner in crime

Loved dolls as a little kid, not Barbies, like baby dolls and porcelain dolls

Fairy lights in her bedroom

Loves music, Josh started buying her cassette tapes and now she collects them

Beth

Can you say LESBIAN?

Is never seen without her hat

Tried to stop Josh and Hannah from causing trouble, it never worked

Uggs and leggings

Smokes weed with Ashley

Her side of her and Hannah's bedroom is so much neater and cleaner

Total metalhead but no one knows bcs "she doesn't look it"

Dr. Hill:

Accidentally opened YouTube once while trying to find the news app

Can't work if the music has lyrics, it's too distracting

Might have a husband

Has such doctor handwriting that he can't hardly read it himself

Coffee addict

911 on speed dial(he's worried about all his patients)

The real Dr Hill is really nice, only the hallucination version is all threatening

Flamethrower guy:

Fucking loves soup

Hasn't bought clothes in years, and got them all secondhand

Has been off the mountain exactly twice

"When did kids get this dumb?"

Secretly stays in the lodge sometimes when no one is there bcs it's shelter and it's kinda fancy

Actually feels crazy guilty for not saving the twins

Was very happy to see Mike making friends with his wolves

[bl00dst41ned]

Omg can you pls do like a fic or headcanons of going to see Barbie with Jobe??💗

*.·:·.✦ barbie world ✦.·:·.*

pairing: jobe bellingham x female reader

summary: in which you and Jobe go watch Barbie, but does he have to know?

author’s note: requested by ihe4rtisa, thank you, sweetie <3 (the pic is by @mondlevan)

word count: 522

“Trampoline park ?” You suggested another activity, and Jobe shook his head.

You guys were currently looking for something to do for the day but neither one of you could agree on one. Resulting in the two of you on the phone, thinking of something to do.

“Let’s just go to the movies” You finally decided, exiting the phone call app to choose a movie to see.

“What is there to see ?” He instantly asked.

The moment you opened the app, you came across Barbie, whom you wanted to see so badly.

But you knew Jobe would never agree. He stated that "it was for girls" and didn't want to see it.

You started to think of a plan before fulfilling it.

“The new Ninja Turtles cartoon movie, you want to go ?”

“Yeah, we can”

“I’ll pick you up” You finished before hanging up.

Dummy, the movie is not out until a week, You thought before going to get ready.

You decided to wear a pink sweater, blue baggy jeans, and some simple white Jordan 1s. You matched your makeup with pink eye makeup and your usual lip combo.

Once you were ready, you grabbed your phone, wallet and car keys before leaving to go get Jobe. You messaged him indicating that you were on the way and asking if he was ready. Which he was, not surprising.

꘎��━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡꘎

Jobe exited the house wearing a black tracksuit and white Air Force 1s. By the look of his corners, you could tell he had gotten a cut within the last 24 hours.

He entered the car giving you a kiss on the temple making you side-eye him.

“So my lips were too far away ?” You sarcastically commented making him laugh.

“A bit, yeah” He teased before leaning in and giving you a real kiss.

Your face turned into a giant smile focusing back on the steering wheel to drive to the cinema. You thought your outfit would have given it away but knowing Jobe, he never caught clues.

Once you arrived, you two got straight in the queue since you had bought the tickets online making it easier for your plan to work.

“Room 7” The employee said after checking the tickets. For some reason, he had not said the name of the film, making you relieved.

“You want some popcorn ?” Jobe offered, guiding you to the area.

You instantly took the biggest one, Barbie decorated, Jobe grimacing.

“You don’t want to go see Barbie with me, let me at least live a bit of my Barbie dream” You retorted not even letting him say anything. Jobe put his hand up in surrender before you both walked to the film. You entered the room seeing half of the other people wearing pink. Jobe found it weird but moved on, still not catching a clue.

꘎♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡꘎

The commercials had already ended and the film just started.

“(Y/N)” Jobe whispered in your ear not wanting to disturb the others “Why does this Barbie commercial is that long ?” 

You looked innocently in front of you with a slight smirk. “What commercial?”

Jobe made a face not entirely getting what you said before understanding and huffing.

“You got to be lying”

like, repost and suggest if you want to (hope you enjoyed it)

masterlist for more

[ophiespeaks]

MY DRS!!!

Masterlist <3

(For inspiration, ideas, or just to get to know me!!! This is in no particular order btw, just the way they’re ordered in my Lifa App.)

———

*Side note, I have a “waiting room” dr too. It’s basically just a big movie theater but all the theater rooms are my different drs. But I’ve elected to not make a full section for it.*

———

•1•

Dr Name: Hogwarts, 1991.

Universe/Basis: Harry Potter

Synopsis: Non-Canonical HP dr where I get to experience the magical world completely and fully with my favorite characters. There’s no war, no plot, and things have been changed to make it more desirable for me. IE: No Death Eaters/Voldemort, no one dies, etc. It’s basically just a boarding school dr with magic lol. It was my main dr for a long time and has a LOT of little things scripted in. Honestly, I’m still so in love with it and if I ever did permashift, it would probably be here.

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•2•

Dr Name: Chosen One

Universe/Basis: Harry Potter

Synopsis: Canon-Adjacent dr where basically I’m Harry. Obviously he doesn’t exist in this dr because I’m obsessed with being the main character (/hj). Things have been scripted to not be so traumatizing and awful all the time, but will loosely follow a sort of plot to let me be the chosen one in a prophecy and basically the center of attention. There’s stakes and I don’t expect to shift here for long intervals because it seems stressful, but I’m shifting to third year with a pre-written backstory for the first two years. Again, not fully canon- certain characters don’t die and the war isn’t killing innocents etc. I just like attention.

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•3•

Dr Name: Lost

Universe/Basis: ABC’s Lost TV Series (2004)

Synopsis: Canon-Adjacent to the Lost TV series, without the um…trauma. Also people don’t die. It’s basically Survivor meets Real Housewives. I live for the drama tbh. Basically the plane crash leaves me stranded with strangers and I get to meet the characters. I don’t have a s/o but I’m looking to be an adoptive daughter figure to Sawyer because emotionally unavailable selfish assholes seem to be my father-figure go to for some reason.

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•4•

Dr Name: The 100

Universe/Basis: CW’s The 100

Synopsis: Heavily scripted but honestly it’s almost-canon to the events of seasons 1 and 2 of the 100, obviously not so traumatizing though. I’m basically using this as a teenage-run society dr or maybe like a huge camping trip dr lmao. None of the 100 die like in canon, and also because I have main character syndrome Clarke and therefore also Wells aren’t part of the original delinquent mission. My s/o is gonna be Bellamy Blake, and I have a few close friends in the 100/eventually the grounders. There’s a lot of drama lmao. Also, my dad is Markus Kane and my (adoptive) brother is Murphy and my whole backstory is so convoluted it needed rewritten multiple times to even be coherent lmao.

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•5•

Dr Name: Fame (Adult)

Universe/Basis: Better CR

Synopsis: Modern-set dr where I’m a famous actress/musician in my early twenties. I own a makeup/skincare company, as well as a non-profit community oriented foundation to teach kids the arts (acting, music, performance, dance, drawing, painting, etc.) but also hosting events and drives to give back to local communities. As for my professional career, I’m a part of some of my favorite movies/shows in my cr, as well as some movie ideas I had myself and made into a franchise in my DR. I’m basically the biggest IT girl and I’m like if Taylor Swift, Olivia Rodrigo, and Margot Robbie were a single person. Some of my films/shows, to name a few, are The VVitch, A Star Is Born, The Summer I Turned Pretty, and Barbie.

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•6•

Dr Name: Fame (Teen)

Universe/Basis: Better CR

Synopsis: An early 2010s dr, I’m a young teen actress and get to star in some of my favorite shows and movies from that time period, as well as some adaptations I thought up myself. My dad is Matthew Grey Gubler because he seems like he’d be such a cool dad, so I’m technically a Nepo baby. I play Dustin’s twin sister in Stranger Things, I play Annabeth Chase in an adaptation of PJO, I play Prim in The Hunger Games, I’m Coraline in a live action adapatation, and a few other roles that I have planned.

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•7•

Dr Name: Assemble

Universe/Basis: MCU - Young Avengers

Synopsis: I’m Tony Stark’s daughter, all the OGs don’t die, and I’m in charge of the Young Avengers. I’ve adapted some comic book characters into new heroes, as well as adding known characters like Spider-man, America Chavez, Yelena (younger in my dr), Kate Bishop, etc. It’s basically like fanfic Avengers lmao. We all live in the compound in upstate New York, and sometimes other “characters” pop in to give us training lessons and stuff such as Stephen Strange or Wong, T’Challa, Bucky, Loki, etc. It seems so fun to just have a compound full of super powered/super-capable teenagers tbh. A nightmare for my dad tho.

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•8•

Dr Name: The Olympian

Universe/Basis: MCU

Synopsis: A more canon-reliant take on an MCU dr, where I join the original Avengers back in 2011. I’m basically a greek demigoddess capable of minor feats of magic, but through being a hero I’m eventually granted full godhood (like Hercules/Heracles in the myths) for my efforts. Fighting villains and hearing the hero drama seems so interesting. Honestly, I’ll probably be less involved in this dr than my Assemble dr, but this one’s still cool if only for my backstory here alone lol.

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•9•

Dr Name: The Games

Universe/Basis: The Hunger Games

Synopsis: Basically not canon at all lmao. I don’t want to kill anyone, that’s insane. Basically, the districts still exist (though people aren’t starving or anything) and “The Games” are basically just a big game show held in the Capitol and the winner gets money, fame, etc. This dr is loosely based off of the prequel, the ballad of songbirds and snakes, so there’s *technically* Coriolanus Snow as my love interest/mentor, but his character is so different that it’s basically not even him- I just find Tom Blythe attractive is all. Also Sejanus Plinth is my bbygirl he deserved so much better.

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•10•

Dr Name: Camp Halfblood

Universe/Basis: PJO

Synopsis: Non-Canon pjo dr. I’m a child of Zeus (I need to be the main character so bad ig. Also, I need to have an absent/terrible biological father apparently?? minus tony tho 🫶) and I’m the only one in the Zeus Cabin. There’s no quests and we’re genuinely just trained over the summer and allowed to either stay or go to school for the rest of the year. It’s basically a summer camp dr but with a little magic and stuff here and there. Percy, Grover, Annabeth, etc. are all my age and eventually Percy will be my s/o because clueless boys of unimaginable power are just so babygirl to me i guess.

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•11•

Dr Name: Bridgerton

Universe/Basis: Netflix’s Bridgerton TV series

Synopsis: Mostly canon, with a few more added families and such. My own background is also a royalty dr- I’m the princess of Norway undercover as the distant relative of Lady Danbury, and I’ve got a few completely made-up love interests because no one in the show is really in my age range??? I mean some are close, like Colin, but he’s in love with Penelope so idk. I just want fancy dresses and huge parties and high society drama tbh.

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•12•

Dr Name: The Walking Dead

Universe/Basis: AMC’s The Walking Dead TV series

Synopsis: HEAVILY SCRIPTED!!! I don’t want my people to die obviously. Zombies/walkers can’t actually hurt us and everyone smells good oof. No cannibals bc ew, it’s basically a found family dr with zombies. I/we won’t have to kill people!!! Both Daryl and Rick are sort of father figures to me, and my love interests include a few people such as Carl, Enid, Ron, and Kelly (I love Kelly sm) and the later seasons are changed to be better to live in and everything’s not constantly falling apart. Also, basically scripting out all of the Negan drama and most stuff after it, because absolutely not.

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•13•

Dr Name: BrBa

Universe/Basis: AMC’s Breaking Bad TV series

Synopsis: LISTEN!!! I just think it would be fun to fuck around in this dr tbh. I’m a high-end dealer (drugs don’t kill people and don’t have a bad effect on people either) and I just want to go to lavish parties and commit high end crimes. I think Walter White is funny as hell unintentionally and Jesse Pinkman seems like the coolest person to just hang out with (at least in the first few seasons of the show.) Obviously, it’s not even remotely canon and doesn’t follow the actual plot. I also won’t spent too much time here. Like I said, it’s just to mess around in. It’s absolutely not serious nor is it a place i’d want to be for long.

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•14•

Dr Name: Narnia

Universe/Basis: The Chronicles of Narnia (films)

Synopsis: Golden Age Narnia? Ruling a magical country, marrying my best friend (Peter), leading people, being highly respected by my court? The whole thing sounds like a fairytale. It’s basically a royalty dr but with magic. Medieval times but, as with all my non-modern drs, I script modern amenities because if I don’t have toilet paper and indoor plumbing I’m gonna scream and cry. I also love the canon Pevensie siblings and their personalities I want to meet them all so bad. Also, Peter Pevensie was my first crush ever, as an fyi.

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•15•

Dr Name: LIS

Universe/Basis: Netflix’ Lost In Space reboot

Synopsis: Canon/mostly canon with fun additions and workarounds. Adoptive/found family dynamics. I get to be a super cool badass with yet another adoptive father figure while exploring alien planets and getting to be besties with penny robinson (i’m forever a penny defender- i love forgotten, “unwanted” middle child archetypes) and getting to meet a literal 7 foot tall alien robot is gonna be SO cool are you kidding me???

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•16•

Dr Name: Stardew Valley

Universe/Basis: Stardew Valley (video game)

Synopsis: CUTE FARMING DR!!! There’s twelve canonical love interests but i’m considering adding a few more options/people in general for funsies. Basically I want to have my little farm and my little animals and run around town and meet people and go to the beach and it’s gonna be so fun i’m so excited for it. I’ve actually considered it for my “waiting room” sort of place, because only the valley itself and like three other places even really exist in canon soooo but idk. (also considering scripting johnnie guilbert as sebastian bc 🤭🤭🤭)

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•17•

Dr Name: Gravity Falls

Universe/Basis: Gravity Falls

Synopsis: Teenage dr, not canon reliant but with weird occurrences and mysteries going on all around. The twins and their friends are older but most of the other characters stay the same age. Instead of having a complicated backstory I straight up just tell Stan I shifted and he’s unbothered because he literally watched his brother get sucked into a portal and fist-fought a pterodactyl so not much can phase him anymore ig.

———

•18•

Dr Name: Summer Ship

Universe/Basis: Better Cr

Synopsis: Um this one’s completely made up by me, hi. Basically me and some of my dr friends are working on a private yacht for the summer. We only work like four hours a day, get paid WAY too much tbh, and then spend the weekends/after work hours getting to live on this huge ass rich people yacht that we’re allowed to go crazy on. It’s sailing the mediterranean so it doubles as a travel dr, where I get to see places like Greece, Rome, Venice, etc. when we dock and go inland. I’m so unbelievably stoked about this one tbh.

———

•19•

Dr Name: Smosh

Universe/Basis: Better Cr

Synopsis: This one’s kinda embarrassing ngl 💀 so basically, the Youtube channel Smosh is this whole big brand that’s like an office completely oriented on making fun videos, sketch comedy, playing board games, etc. and it looks SO fun to work there. Some of the people in videos/crew behind the scenes seem like genuinely nice people so basically it’s a better cr dr where I just work there too, and I’m a little older lol. Like obviously it’s a job like anywhere else, but a lot of the time their job is fart jokes and playing games.

———

•20•

Dr Name: Sword AF

Universe/Basis: Smosh - DnD Campaign

Synopsis: If I thought the last one was embarrassing, this takes the cake lmao. So, Smosh runs a dnd campaign where four of them play characters and then the dm plays a bunch of npcs. I’ve scripted myself as a fantasy character to explore the dr world based off of the dnd campaign’s world. Interacting with real people who are the characters my friends play in a different dr lmao. But an ancient giant wooden robot, a blue goblin, a gay elf, and a horny older halfling lady are MY comfort characters, okay! It’s a dnd dr, based off of the Sword AF campaign.

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•21•

Dr Name: A:TLA

Universe/Basis: Nickelodeon’s Avatar Cartoon

Synopsis: guys i LOVE avatar omg. uncle iroh singing little soldier boy can make me cry on command to this day. In this dr, I’m a fire bender runaway living in Omashu. I also scripted different fire nation “countries,” like how the earth kingdom has sort of different governments set-up throughout or how the water tribes have the two separate tribes on either pole. I’m from an island tribe and because I like attention, I’m a princess in that kingdom. This dr is mostly canon??? It was a cartoon so not too much traumatizing stuff happened anyways, but there are certainly some…questionable moments.

———

Honorable Mentions

(drs that i *technically* have, but have put little to no thought into the actual context of and i currently have no desire to actively shift to, just future possibilities)

-“Dog Days,” a Diary of a Wimpy Kid dr (i am down BAD for rodrick heffley)

-BAU/criminal minds dr (i have no idea how i’d POSSIBLY script this to not be traumatic so for now it’s not even really a dr, just a place i may want to go???)

-“Safety” dr (without too much detail, I’m a kid again and live in a valley home with my favorite people, with neighbor kids and the whole place is filled with flowers and it’s always summer. basically just a stress-free dreamland.)

-Sam and Colby dr. (ghost hunting but i’m a medium + getting up to some utter tomfoolery in a youtuber house)

-Daybreak dr based off of the netflix show (societies run by teenagers AND zombie survival found family drs seem to be a favorite of mine, and this is both)

-“Hawkins” dr, basically stranger things without any strange things (no way am i facing a demogorgan head on, let ALONE vecna or the mind flayer are you KIDDING???)

-The Walking Dead (game), (I love Clementine so much) (I honestly might just script twdg characters into my main twd dr so I don’t have to have multiple, idk yet)

-“Royal University,” yet another royalty dr bc i’m self obsessed ig, (made up royalty heirs in a college dr)

-Hogwarts, 1971 (undecided/not scripted marauders era dr. obsessed with andrew garfield as remus lupin.)

-Hogwarts, 2011 (undecided dr of the golden-trio era’s kids from the series epilogue/*minor* elements of cursed child, teddy lupin gets to live with his parents bc i WILL start crying)

-Youtuber Dr, (Making horror content/horror-themed video essays, will be in the same sort of circle as Wendigoon, the Lore Lodge, Loey Lane, Nexpo, etc.)

-Various short-term drs to figure out what happened at certain instances in my cr. I kind of think of them as “fly on the wall” drs just for me to be in a location to fully understand what happened there. Mainly, cold cases/unexplained events. (Jonbenet Ramsey, mothman bridge incident, phoenix lights, dyatlov pass, and several missing 411 cases mostly.)

-Cool History dr, where I can go see cool historical moments for myself from my cr. such as the building of the pyramids, the library of alexandria, the “resurrection of jesus” (since he was a real person), woodstock, stonewall, etc.

———

I am always accepting more dr ideas, tbh. Any piece of media I consume is free real estate for a dr if we’re being so fr.

[seenoversundown]

Sparrow Of The Dawn : Chapter Five

Sam x Willa (Fem OC)

Warnings: Swearing, One mention of the word 'Daddy', mentions of boners? Mild accidental groping, light talk of spit kink if you squint, a lot of movie references, Jumpscare Warning: Jeremy Allen White, mentions of very minor injury, Girls Night (gender neutral term), guys being dudes, mentions of avoiding a car accident, fluff, and per usual Sam just being his usual self.

Word Count: 8k.

Author’s Note: Taco Bell IS on the boycott list and just included for entertainment purposes. Also, if you need help with figuring out which companies are on the boycott list you can download the “No Thanks” app to keep track!

Summary: Sam unfortunately finds himself in not so meet cute with Willa. Hopeful that he doesn't cross her path again; the world works in mysterious ways and not always in your favor.

That's Not My Name - The Ting Tings “Are you callin' me darlin', are you callin' me bird?”

‘If it weren’t for bad luck, we wouldn’t have any luck at all’ is a phrase my grandfather repeated growing up. I feel that a little more deeply these days, especially when it comes to my truck. As I sit here, willing her to turn over every time I twist the key, I lose a bit more hope. I have got to get her looked at. I pull my phone from my back pocket and text the group chat, praying that someone is awake this early. 

Me: Is anyone awake that loves me enough to drive me into work. Edith wont start again ☹️

Tweedle Dee 🦐: It’s your lucky day.

It only takes about ten minutes before Josh pulls up in his white Jeep truck, and I’ve never been more thankful that we all live so close. 

“You look awfully dapper for 7:30 in the morning,” I remark, eyebrow cocked. 

“And you are just a pair of cargo shorts away from being Steve Irwin, but you don’t hear me questioning you.” He retorts. Touche. “I thought I was dropping you off at the newspaper office?”

“You are, but we’re going to Wolfe’s Neck to take some nature photos for the assignment we’re working on. I’m meeting her at the office first.” Josh and I haven’t spoken much in the last few days; he’s always busy lately, working at the bar or devoid of his phone for hours, so I fill him in on the project.

“An incredible idea, Sammy. All hers, I assume?” He chides.

“Not.. all hers. I helped.” I speak a bit more defensively than I mean to. 

“Convincing.”

“I did! We’re even using a couple of my film cameras because I’m so nice.” I further defend my stance.

He pulls up to the curb, effectively cutting our conversation short, thankfully, and I exit his car.

“Sam!” He yells jovially, and I turn around, his window fully unrolled. “Have a good day, Sammy Boy! Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!” He twists the dial on his stereo volume. The soundtrack of my suffering plays to the tune of ‘Barbie Girl’ by Aqua. I wave him ‘goodbye’ with a simple middle finger as he drives off. As I make my way back to the front door, there she is. 

Birdie. 

She greets me with, “I bet he’s a nightmare in the morning.”

“You have no idea.” I reach for the door, opening it for us both and letting her walk in first because I am a gentleman; however, I am still a pain in the ass. “Is it not too early in the morning for my voice today?” 

“It's always far too early to hear your voice, Samuel.” She presses the button on the elevator and twists her shoulders toward me. 

“How are we supposed to work together if you refuse to talk to me, huh?”

“It’s not like taking pictures requires conversation.” The sound of the elevator dinging catches our attention, and we both enter. Birdie reaches to press the correct floor button.

“How about,” I start, facing her and smirking with a cocked eyebrow, “we stop for coffee and breakfast, my treat? Since now, I don’t have to break the news to you that you have to drive.”

“You.. have my attention.” The elevator arrives, and we exit right, down the hallway, through the glass door, and past the reception desk. Sharon greets us warmly with a wave; she’s no Daisy, but she is lovely. Once we reach the cubicles, we separate, unloading our belongings on our own desks. Birdie looks good today. Her earth-toned Patagonia pullover fits snuggly, along with the black leggings on her legs. The tail ends of her brown bob poking out the bottom of her tan Carhartt beanie. 

“I see you’ve dressed for the occasion.”

“Oh, uh yeah. I couldn’t exactly wear my Steve Maddens in the forest.” She stares down at the white socks and brown hiking boots I know are on her feet. “Where are we going, by the way? You never told me, just said, ‘I have a place.’”

“Wolfe’s Neck State Park, you been before?” 

“Surprisingly, no. It’s on my list though.”

“It doesn’t open until 9, so we have a little bit of time to kill before we have to leave; it’s only a half-hour drive. Maybe forty-five or fifty with breakfast.”

“Did you wanna hit up Dunkies for breakfast?” she asks.

“Please, god no. They can never get my food right. I swear they have a secret vendetta against vegetarians.” 

“I didn’t know you were a vegetarian. Is it an animals with faces thing?”

“Nah, Daniel, bet me fifty bucks I couldn’t do it. I never turn down a bet.” I sit down on my desk and cross my arms. Looking at her over the divider.

“How’d that turn out for you?”

“A new diet and fifty bucks richer,” I snicker. 

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

The trail I lead her down is not a very long one. I can hear her small feet padding behind me, breaking branches and rustling leaves in quick steps. She takes two to match my every one. I figured one of the shorter trails would work better for getting in and out with enough time to head back and finish our project. 

“Ooooh, it's giving Twilight,” she beams, eyes huge with excitement.

I turn to follow her gaze toward the large, moss-covered rock wall. A few fallen, slimmer trees lay around the bottom. She runs over toward it.

“This is the skin of a killer, Bella.” Reenacting a scene from the movie. A movie I’ve definitely never seen. “I don’t care. You won’t hurt me.” she quotes dramatically, switching from Edward to Bella. She matches Bella’s awkward movements perfectly. It’s hard not to laugh, her head bobbing, arms flailing, jumping back and forth between spots for each character. I haven’t seen this side of her yet, A fun side. Who knew Birdie had it in her? 

“You know I’ve never seen Twilight before.” I lie as I slip one strap off my shoulder and pull my bag around to the front of my body. Unzipping the compartment that has her camera in it, I pull it out and give it a wiggle. She walks over to meet me. 

“Never had a girlfriend in high school who forced you to watch it?” she smiles, jokingly as she takes the camera from my hand and slips the strap around her neck, checking over her settings.

“Nope.” popping the ‘p’, “Never really dated til I got to college.” I take out my own camera.

“Aw got no game huh?” She makes a mocking frown at me as we walk down the trail. 

“Got no game, huh?” I mimic her. Way to go, Sammy. Wicked come back. That’ll teach her. 

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

We take our time, snapping photos as we go until we reach the water. It's beautiful here. Large formed rocks surround the lake that makes up an amazing scenic view. The sunshine only adds to the effect. It's breathtaking every time. I can’t believe she’s never been here before. We slowly walk up to the edge of the water. She finds little crevices that the water runs through. In her continued child-like wonder she can’t help but kneel down to run her fingers through it, picking up small rocks to inspect before dropping them back into the tiny flowing river. The sun’s rays bounce off the water, the reflection a bit blinding, but I’ll take it on a day like today. It sparkles off the waves created by the small gusts of wind, which keeps me comfortable, but I notice the little shivers that run through her shoulders. Despite the minimal clouds in the sky, the sun isn’t strong enough to truly warm you from within this time of year. 

I watch as Birdie steps onto one of the taller rock formations. She brings the camera to her eye, the clicking sound pleasantly mixed with the sound of all the petite rivers running nearby. She drops her camera and tilts her face toward the sun, eyes closed, taking in the warmth from the sunshine above. She looks as peaceful as it feels out here. I snap a photo of her. She brings her arms out as if she's standing at the head of the Titanic; I snap another one. That is what Maine is about, the simplistic beauty of being with nature. Any time of year, any weather. Just enjoying the feeling of connecting to nature. Water, trees, rocks, sunshine. All of it. Always. 

I’m so lost in thoughts of her and home I don’t notice her suddenly standing in front of me. 

“Earth to Samuel.” She sing-songs, fingers waving in front of my face.

I shake my head, willing my brain to focus on the task at hand. “Yeah, what.”

“Can I put this in your bag?” She’s holding a rock. A damp, white-ish looking rock clutched between her delicate fingers. 

“Uh, sure?” I’m very confused. I open a compartment, and as she places the rock inside, she shivers again. I guess it is chilly despite the day’s sunshine. It's still March after all, though I’m not a great gauge for temperature because I run warm.

“Are you cold, Birdie?” I question.

She scrunches her nose in response. I fight with the thought of how cute that is. “I’ll be fine,” she dismisses. “I’m always cold.”

“Here, take my scarf. I’m hot anyway.” Pulling my scarf from around my neck.

She immediately gives me a side-eye. 

“It’s.. not gonna bite, Birdie?” I tease her with a little wave of the scarf.

“Not my name,” she scrunches her nose again, apprehensively reaching out to grab it. “Biting I'm not worried about. It being magically cursed into strangling me when I least suspect it, on the other hand.” She tosses her hands back and forth like an invisible set of scales. Her hands work intently as she folds the scarf in half and places it around her neck, taking the ends through the loop and pulling it tight. 

“What am I? Harry Potter?” I scoff. 

She lets out a cackle. “Not even remotely. More like Lucius Malfoy.” She raises an eyebrow at me. 

“Wow, straight to Lucius. Not even Draco, huh? Yeah, I guess I am Daddy.” I stop in my tracks as I watch her pluck another rock from the tiny river leading out toward the water.

“Ew. God, no.” Her infectious laugh hits me right in the gut.

“See, Lucius was evil.” She stands, and her eyes give me a once over before placing the rock in my hand, presumably to be put in my bag with the other one. “Draco had a good heart even if he was a little chicken. Plus,” raising her pointer finger, “he was hot. And you are neither of those things.” She turns back to the small river of flowing water.

My mind flashes back to the other night at the bar, where she’s sitting with her friend. “No, you’re right, Wilson. Sam IS cute.” Replaying in my head. 

“Oh, really?” my mischievous side coming out to play. I step toward her. 

“Mhmm.” 

“OH, REALLY??” I repeat louder, taking another step. She stands to face me.

“YES,” she says pointedly. 

I smile wide, now looking down at her. 

“That’s not what your friend said the other night.” I bite my lip, tilting my head to the side and running my hand along my jawline. I watch as her eyes follow my movement, a fire lighting behind them. I know I’ve gotten under her skin by calling her out. 

She raises both of her eyebrows, this time taking a step toward me to fully bridge the gap between us. Nearly chest to chest, nose to nose, she says, “Wow, I’m actually shocked you were able to pull your head out of your ass long enough to hear someone speak besides yourself.”

I chuckle, running my tongue along my teeth. “I don’t hear you denying it. Go on, you can say it. You think I’m hot.”

“And why would I need to deny such a clearly false statement, Samuel?” Confusion etched across her face. “You know, when you come up for air, usually you can hear better. You should try it sometime.”

“So, that’s not what I heard, huh? ‘You’re right, he IS really cute.’ ? Your friend never said that?”

“No, you didn’t. Because no, they didn’t.” She huffs. I pick up on the use of ‘they.’  

“Right, right.” I nod my head. “So, do they frequently lie to embarrass you?” a silent acknowledgment between us. 

She pulls out her phone, tapping away. 

“Whaaaat are ya doing?” I question her clear deflection. 

“Just looking to see if there is a quick care clinic open on our way home because, obviously, you need to have your ears checked out,” She pockets her phone. “Can we continue, please?” A swift eye roll follows as she turns to walk back toward the little river.

“Wait, wait, wait,” a breathy chuckle falling from my lips. “If it's not you who thinks I’m cute. Then it must be your friend, right?” She opens her mouth to try to cut me off before I even get started, but, “So, can I have their number then?” slips out before she can manage. I relish in the fact that I know I’m bothering her. 

“No, no. Absolutely not.”

“Wow, for being Birdie, you’re not much of a wing-woman, are you?”

“First off, they would hate you. Second off, what makes you think I’d ever be your wing-woman. And THIRD-OFF, that’s not my name.”

I feel a bit of satisfaction and a warm swell of my belly when her nose scrunches in distaste. 

I wander off back toward the trail we came down, keeping my gaze pointed toward the opening in the trees. Trying to focus in between the little gaps for anything interesting or photo-worthy. The leaves are not quite growing yet, and the ground still wet with leftover melted snow. I can hear the squish of the damp soil with every step I take. The lead into spring is probably my favorite time of year. Most people enjoy the summer because the weather is nice and warm and the surrounding cities are alive with tourists and events. But those moments of fresh life leading into spring show you that despite the dark coldness of the winter, you can still grow and bloom into beautiful potential. The hope of it all, to come out the other end of the darkness to greet the sunshine, is why it's such a valued season to me. 

Just then, Birdie comes padding over to me with two more rocks in her hands.

“Sam, I found more.” She calls on her way over. I, once again, pull my bag to the front, and she opens a pocket, attempting to deposit the rocks herself.

“No, not there, I have a lens in there.” I zip it back up and choose a different one. “Try this one.” As she’s trying to fit the larger of the two in there, something clicks inside my brain.

“You’re one of those girls, aren’t you?” 

“One of what?” Her brows are knit in frustration when she realizes the rock is too big. She picks another, thankfully empty, pocket.

“One of those girls that sits around with her crystals and her tarot and her moon water.” I chide.

Her hands stop what they are doing and she slowly looks up at me, eyes narrowing. “How do you know about moon water?”

“It’s a long story.” I shake my head and sidestep the comment so I don’t have to talk about ‘she who shall not be named’. “You know my brother is into all that shit. He’s got crystals all over the place.” 

“The brother that owns the bar or the one with the mustache?”

“Uhh.. both of my brothers have a mustache.” 

“You sure about that.” She smirks. Oh, they’re both gunna just looove that. “Actually, why don’t you give him my number since we seem to actually have things in common.”

“No.” immediately denying her. “If you refuse to be my wing-woman. I refuse to be your wingman. No way.”

“Fine then, at least make yourself useful and find some space to fit this in your bag.” Flashing the rock, she couldn’t fit before. 

“Seriously, how many more of these do you need, Birdie? My bag is getting heavy.” 

“How about you hold this one.” She pulls a small crystal from her bra, and drops it into my open hand. “It’s good for grounding. Maybe it’ll help center you. Woo sah, Sam. Woo Sah.” 

Very funny.

I offer to drive the way home and now I’m curled uncomfortably in the driver's seat of Birdie’s car. Partly to get warm again and partly because of the intense growling of my stomach. 

“We should stop for lunch before we head into the office,” I suggest.  

“Where?” She pulls out her phone, searching for options.

“Is there a Taco Bell nearby?” 

“You can eat at Taco Bell? I wouldn’t think a Mexican food place would be vegetarian friendly.”

“Taco Bell is hardly Mexican, but you can sub almost anything out for beans. Plus, I’m craving a crunchwrap.” 

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We pull up to the drive-through speaker, and I place my order. “I’ll have a cravings box with a black bean crunchwrap supreme, a spicy potato taco, and cheesy fiesta potatoes, and a Large Dr. Pepper, please.” Her eyes are boring holes into the side of my skull as I pull out my card to pay. I scrunch my face in question. 

“Nothing.” is all she says.

She leans over the center console to place her order, elbows perched and ass off the seat. I know she’s trying to be able to project her voice from across the car, but she is so close. I shrink back into my seat to try and give her space, but I can't escape her sweet floral perfume. Oh, she smells so good. I close my eyes, reveling in the mixture of orange blossoms and vanilla as it clouds my brain.

“I’ll have two soft taco supremes and a medium Baja Blast, please.” She plops her ass back in her seat, “Ready?” 

I open my eyes again. “Yep.”

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I hand the cashier my card and receive the receipt and we pull up to the second window. She is staring at me again with the most unpleasant face. 

“Okay, what gives. Why are you looking at me like that?”

The worker opens the window and hands us our order. Birdie's own customer service voice shining through her ‘thank you so much!’ Unwrapping our straws and sticking them in our respective drinks while I slowly pull away from the building. I reach for my Dr. Pepper and take a large, satisfying gulp. 

“How can you possibly drink that?” 

“A Dr. Pepper?”

“Yes! It's like.. Against the law in at least 22 states to not order Baja Blast when you go to Taco Bell.” she quips.

“Oh, you’re not gunna like this.” I pause.

She stares intently.

I take a deep breath in and exhale slowly, “I.. don’t.. Like Baja Blast.” 

She stares some more. This time, the brown of her eyes barely peeking through the thin space between her eyelids. 

“Dr. Pepper just hits better.” I shrug.

“We- Are not friends.” Turning back to the food in her lap.

“Consider it one of my 19 crimes,” mumbling around a bite of my lunch. 

“Every sip is a little act of warfare, Sam.” She argues a bit further down the road. “I cannot believe you would commit such.. Such TREASON in my own car.” Her hands wave theatrically in front of her.

“Oh, you’re a Queen now, are you?”

“It is my car, so if I say I’m the Queen of my car, then I’m the Queen of my car. And I rule that drinking Dr. Pepper is an act of treason.” She crosses her arms, chin raised high, a playful smirk sitting on her plush, chapstick-covered lips.  

I laugh, a good, full-bellied laugh. She’s fun when she wants to be. When she’s not being so combative.

“I’m so sorry, Your Grace,” I respond and enthusiastically take a bite of my spicy potato taco. She rolls her eyes at me.

“How much food did you order?”

“What? I’m a growing boy!” I argue.

As soon as I take another bite, chipotle sauce comes out the bottom and lands right in my lap. “Oh shit!” I once again say around my food. She starts to rummage through the bag for some napkins. When she finds one, I reach my hand out to take it, but she bypasses me completely, leaning right over the center console with her head nearly in my lap, hands working to try and get the sauce out before it stains.

That’s how I ended up praying to the Gods above that I don’t accidentally pop a boner while she cleans up my crotch. What have I done to deserve this?

“It’s fine. It’s not on the seat. It’s just on your pants. Hold on.” I squirm under the pressure of her fingers as she tugs to flatten out the fabric of my khakis to make sure she gets it all. 

“It's fine, Birdie. Birdie!” raising my voice to catch her attention, to no avail. “I can take care of it when we get back. Or we can stop off at my apartment, and I can change.” I plead, desperately wishing for this to be over. 

“I almost got it. Stop moving!” I glance down as she slaps my thigh. Holy shit. She licks the napkin then and I swear I see Jesus in the middle of the freeway. I press the brakes to slow down to avoid a collision. Trying my best to focus on the road ahead, but instead, now all I can think about is her spit on my dick. Oh God. My eyes go wide as soon as the thought crosses my mind, and my dick definitely twitches. 

Oh, don’t go there. Not now. Think Sam, Think. Grandma Althea. Her house is old and smells like moth balls. Her hands are always dry from all the fabric she touches because she’s always sewing something. She coughs really loud and wet because of the cigarettes she smokes. I breathe a heavy sigh of relief when Birdie sits up. She clears her throat, “I uh think it should be all set.”

We drive the rest of the way back to the office in silence. I really hope she didn’t notice. But then again, I do have terrible luck.

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When I walk into the dark room, Birdie is already in there; the red lights casting a glow on her that reminds me of the first time she walked into my brother’s bar. Though now she’s rifling through the lower shelves.

“Whatcha lookin’ for?”  

“I uhh, I haven’t developed film since college. Tryna find some instructions.” Her ass in the air as she continues her search. 

“I don’t have nine film cameras for nothing, Birdie. I know how to develop film I can help.”

She stands and faces me, the uncomfortable expression on her face taking on a completely different view under the light. I wish I knew her well enough to know why she’s so uncomfortable. 

I get us set up with our film canisters and developing mixture while she grabs the rolls of film from my bag. We each carefully cut the film off the cassette. I try to focus on what I’m doing instead of how our fingers gently brush each other while loading the film onto the reel. I pour the developing mixture into each canister while she watches on. 

“We have to shake them every, like thirty seconds for a few minutes, and then we can do the stop bath,” I instruct her, and she nods.

Her small, delicate hands hold the rather large container as she shakes it back and forth. “Like this?” She questions, her brow furrowed. And.. I am only a man. Staring too closely at the motion of her hands, I freeze. For christ’s sake Sam. Be normal for 5 seconds. As I clear my throat to answer, I drop my canister. In her attempt to help me we end up crashing our heads together.

“OW.” “Oh Fuck.” We mumble at the same time. I feel around for the edge of the counter and end up knocking the other film canisters into the sink. 

“For fuck’s sake,” I whine. I reach to grab those, and Birdie bends down to grab the one I dropped. And, it is so dark in here she ends up ramming her head right into my junk.

“Fuck!” I yell. At the rate we’re both complaining, I’m sure they think we’re trying to fuck. If only I were that lucky. Instead, I now need to ice my goods.

I hold my breath, willing the pain to stop.

“Sorry.” her apology is small. 

A strained “It’s fine” tumbles from my lips.

We continue awkwardly fumbling around each other, trying to make sure the rest of the containers stay properly agitated, and instead, she gets properly agitated. If this was a cartoon, I’m positive that steam would be coming out of her ears.

“It’s too small in here; you are far too large, and it's too dark.” She huffs. 

“I don't know what to tell you, Birdie. It’s a darkroom, and I cannot get any smaller.”

“That’s not my fucking name.” Angrily, setting down the container with a loud thud. 

We add the stop bath and then the fixer, making sure to keep a good distance from each other, and then finally rinse and soak the film. 

When we hang the film up to dry, I realize I have about a foot on her.

“Need me to get you a stool, shortie? Or should you just hop on, and I could lift you up.” A cocky smirk spreads across my lips. 

“Nah, you’re the man you could do the heavy lifting,” she makes air quotes around ‘heavy lifting’. 

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 Once they’re fully dry, I gather the film strips and bring them to the lightbox. Scooting our stools close and setting each strip up one by one to see the negatives of our photos. Shooting nature is one of my favorite things but Birdie really does have an incredible eye for it. Of course, I’d never tell her that because she would hold it over my head. Our styles are very different, which is clear to see lined up next to each other, but they still look amazing together. 

“These.. Are really great, Birdie.” I smile down at her and bump her with my shoulder gently. Her face softens a bit and I can’t help but think how beautiful she looks. I am a man- I’m not blind.

“The hard part is choosing the best ones. It feels like choosing my favorite children.” Her infectious laugh plays through my ears, and I smile back.

We take some time discussing which ones have the best lighting or the best proportions. Which ones we think will make great features and finally settle on eight ‘prized children’ to print. The other eight photos selected for our presentation will be digitally edited and printed outside of the darkroom, making at least half of this project easy. At least the editing and printing we can do from the comfort of our homes in our PJs. Which is exactly what I will be doing after I see Daniel for dinner. 

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We settle back in the dark room using the projectors to print our respective photos. I don’t know what’s in the air today because I keep messing up. Either exposing for too long or too short and I keep running back and forth between the developing tray and my projector to try to correct it. On one of my passes, I run smack into Birdie. In my effort to stop the collision, I put my one unoccupied hand out to cushion the momentum and ended up grabbing her boob instead. For fucks sake. How does this shit keep happening?

I pause, slowly backing away. She just heavily sighs.

“Well.” She brushes her hands off and adjusts her beanie. “That’s the most action I’ve had in a minute.”

Before I can stop myself, I blurt out, “Is that why you’re such a tight ass?”

“No, I have,” she emphasizes, “such a tight ass because I do squats.” And now I’m thinking about her in tight gym pants doing squats.

“Well, if you ever need help loosening up a bit, you know who to call.” 

“Jeremy Allen White?” 

“Who?” I match her confused expression.

“Oh, you know, he was in Shameless. The bear?” her brow further knits each second that passes. “He just had that big ad campaign for Calvin Klein?” Calvin Klein? As in.. models. Cool. First Edward, then Draco, now.. models.

“Yes, because I definitely seem like the kind of guy who keeps up with Calvin Klein campaigns.” Really trying to drive the point home with a snarky tone. 

“Oh..” I try to read the expression on her face before she continues, “I just thought because of you.. You know, actually know how to dress yourself.”

“I’m going to take that as a compliment.”

“You shouldn’t. Your competition is the genre of men who pick up a shirt off the floor and go, ‘yeah, this smells clean’.” She stands on her tiptoes as she hangs her last photo and then promptly exits the darkroom. 

A few minutes later, she returns through the circular door. It always reminds me of something a magician would have on stage. A weird sort of contraption to ensure the light stays out and doesn’t ruin the developing process for those inside.

“Sam.” her voice is quiet again, just above a whisper. I look up at her and can barely make out her petite frame in the dark. She’s just standing, a strip of film pinched between her fingers, head hung low. 

She continues just as quietly, “Did you.. Um. When did you take these?” The realization hits me. I forgot about the pictures of her. 

“Oh. Uhh. You were just.. Ya know in your element. And I sorta thought. Well, this is a big part of what Maine is like. Ya know. Outside, nature. You just seemed.. Happy. Thought it should be captured..” I trail off. Oh God, she’s gonna think it's weird. It's not weird, though, right? No, Sam, it's fine. 

The length of silence kills me. The longer she doesn’t talk the more I start to internally freak out. As if being a naturally warm-blooded person wasn’t bad enough, I feel myself start to sweat. I wipe my forehead of the perspiration gathering there and grab at my wrists for a hair tie, of which is conveniently missing at this moment. Please say something… please.

“This.. um.” she pauses, inhaling and exhaling a deep breath. “They’re lovely, Sammy. Thank you.”

Sammy.

“Yeah.. yeah. You’re welcome.” I shift my focus back to my photo.

“So, uh.. Anyways,” she says, calling my attention back to her. “Since we’re printing the photos here and we’re editing the digital ones at home, you can just email me the finished ones when you’re done, and we can talk about the bullet points we’ll go over for the presentation.” She turns on the projector light until she gets the desired contrast, and then turns it off and carries her photo to the developer bin. I grab my own photo and walk over to meet her, dropping it in the solution to join hers. She idly uses the tongs to move her photo around the bin to help the developing process. Just like shaking a Polaroid picture, it doesn’t really work; it only passes the time. 

“That sounds good, Birdie.” I reach to grab the other set of tongs and end up blindly bumping her arm in the process, knocking hers to the ground. She bends down to retrieve them, and I set my sights on a different pair of tongs to my left. Two things happen at once. First, I bend slightly to reach the other pair. Second, she headbutts my ass. That’s two parts of me she has head-butted today.

“We’ve touched more today than I ever thought we would in this lifetime.” She groans.

“Think about us touching often, huh?” because I can’t help but try to get under her skin every chance I get. 

“Why are you like this?” she complains. She tosses the tongs back on the counter and goes to fish the photo out with her fingers. I lunge to stop her, but I’m too slow.

Now, it’s definitely not life-threatening to handle photo-developing chemicals without gloves. But they are, at the end of the day, chemicals and can sting like a bitch if you have opened wounds. Given how clumsy she is, I anticipate –

“Ouch, FUCK!” she yells, cradling her hand. I grab her by the wrist and shimmy us over to the sink, where I turn the water on cold. When the temperature is cool enough, I pull her finger under the running water.

“That was stupid of you.” I gently scold her. There’s no weight behind my words, just concern. 

“How stupid, Sam? I didn’t realize I had a cut. Is it bad? Do I need to see a doctor?” She rattles off. 

“Hey, hey, hey.” I leave one hand on her wrist, keeping it in place under the faucet, the other one I place on her cheek. Settling in the crook of her neck beneath her ear. The palm of my hand burns against her cool skin; she really is always cold. Despite the darkness of the room I still pull her gaze to meet mine. “Calm down, okay? You’re fine, I promise. A little stupid, maybe. But you’re fine.” I rub my thumb along her cheekbone, hoping to soothe her worries. I can barely make out her eyelids as they flutter closed for a moment and then open again. 

“You promise?” I can feel the anxiety radiating off her.

“I’d pinky promise if you wanted me to.” I joke, and she lets out a small giggle. Pride settles in my chest, knowing a crisis is averted.

“God, that was stupid.” she laughs again and rests her forehead against my chest.

“Lil bit.” I shake my head and slide my hand down to rub her back. Part of me doesn’t want to move from this spot, knowing she's comforted, but I ruin the moment anyway. I pull back from her, hand resting on her shoulder now. 

“Lesson learned, huh?”

She zips the top portion of her Patagonia pullover a little higher when we make it outside. I pull out my phone to see who is available to be my chauffeur home.

“Did you need a ride home, Sam?” She asks, pulling her collar up to her ears. The ends of her hair start to stick out. 

“I was just going to see which brother was a spare and could swing by.” I drop my eyes back to my phone. 

“I can give you a ride home if you want? I know you’re not too far out of my way, I can just.. Drop you off?” placing her foot on the next step down and pointing toward the parking lot. 

“You don’t have to do that. None of them do anything productive anyway.” I laugh. 

“Do you have more than just the two?” I bite my lip and smile when her brow furrows in confusion. 

“No, but you know Daniel? The bouncer? We went to grade school together so he’s been my best friend since we were like six. He's basically a brother at this point. Ya know, brotha from anotha motha.” Her gentle laugh bringing forth another swirl in my belly. 

“Oh, I was about to say. I’m not sure the world could realistically handle any more of you Kiszkas.” She says when we finally reach the sidewalk. 

“Yeah, they broke the mold with me. Realized I was peak Kiszka genes and said, ‘all done’.”

“Seriously though, I can give you a ride. It’s no big deal.”

I fall in step with her, “Why not? None of my degenerate brothers are answering me anyway.”

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The drive back to my apartment is quiet. Almost too quiet for us. The awkwardness of the day still lingering in the air. I clear my throat to cut the silence, but I can’t think of anything to say to fill it. I just fidget with my fingers instead.

“How are you getting to Boston tomorrow?”

“Uhm, well, the plan was to ride the train in like I did last time, but Edith almost made me miss it.”

“Edith. Right. Your truck.” 

“She’s having trouble turning over.” I run a hand through my hair.

“Well, I don’t want to have to worry about you missing your train and messing up this presentation for us by not being there, so i'll pick you up at like 6 a.m. if that’s fine with you.”

“You don’t have to do that. I told you I live close to my brothers. I'm sure one of them can take me.” 

“It’s really fine. I have to make the drive anyway and I really want this presentation to go off without a hitch. It would make me feel better if I knew for sure you’d be there.”

I don’t read into that sentiment. She just wants the project to be successful, and I know that. So I agree, much to my dismay. I hate feeling like a burden to people, and with Edith giving me trouble, I feel pretty much like a burden to everyone who has to deal with me. 

When we reach my apartment, she pulls over to the sidewalk out front. 

“Why don’t you put your number in my phone, and I’ll text you when I leave my apartment. I’m only like ten minutes away.” She pulls her phone out from the center console near her gear shift, and I put my contact info in. Entering my phone number and email under Sammy Kiszka with the camera emoji.

“I put my email in there so you can flag it, but shoot me a text with yours when you get home so I know where to send the digitals.” I place her phone back in her palm. “Thanks again for.. carting me around.” I let out an awkward laugh and scratch the back of my neck. 

“No problem, see you in the morning,” she gives me a tight-lipped smile. 

“Yeah, see you tomorrow.” I grab my camera bag and hop out of her car. Shutting the door with a small wave through the window. 

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When I hear the signature knock, I know Daniel’s arrived. Two quick knocks, a pause, a single knock, another pause, and ending with two quick knocks. I don’t know when he developed that habit, but he only uses it on my door. Penelope lets out a loud boof of a bark and runs ahead of me, her shaggy hair swaying with her little jumps. Well, little for Pen. When I open the door, she’s already sniffing and pawing at his legs. 

“I brought beer.” He says as he holds up the 12-pack of coronas, careful not to trip around her. “Hope you got limes.”

“It’s me. Of course, I do.” Gesturing to myself and stepping aside to let him in, “Plus, I have an extra large meat-lovers pizza on the way.” I resist the urge to make a joke about ‘meat-lovers and guys night.’ “So.. tell me what’s wrong.” I continue, following him into my kitchen. He's stacking the beers one by one inside the fridge to keep cold, Penelope impatiently waiting for her attention from her favorite uncle. Her words not mine. I can tell by the expression on his face he’s struggling with whatever is on his mind. He closes the refrigerator door and shrugs off his coat, setting it on a nearby chair. 

“Hello, Penny girl. I wouldn’t forget about you, I promise.” She laps at his fingers as he playfully pets her face. Still reaching for her head as he stands, he takes a deep breath. “I, uhh, went on a date last night..”

“Still living up to your name, I see. How was it? Awful? Terrible? Did she have a big head or lipstick on her teeth?”

“Very funny.” He snarks back. “It was terrible, thank you very much.”

Eventually, I get the full story out of him. His date, named Allie, a very adorable waitress he met through a friend of a friend, was completely horrible (pleasant), didn’t let him pay (she wanted to split the bill because her drink was expensive and she felt bad), and.. the kicker? She opened the door for him (she got to the door first). We’re each two slices and a few beers deep, and I can’t figure out where the awful comes in. 

“She sounded completely fine, Daniel. I don’t get it?” I lean back against the couch, Penny quietly snoring by my feet. 

“She ordered a salad, Sam.” he looks at me expectantly as if that answers everything. “A SALAD!”

“Oh no. A salad. How completely terrible of her.” I roll my eyes. 

“I.. want a girl who isn’t afraid of eating a burger.” he shrugs, drawing a sip of his corona and lime. 

“Do you want me to be honest with you?” I pinch the bridge of my nose and close my eyes in frustration.

“Always.”

“Bro.. you have got to get over Melody.”

He stands, effectively scaring Pen awake, and I watch him pace back and forth in front of my TV. She pads over to him, nails clicking against the hardwood until she can get her paws on him. 

“This has nothing to do with her.” He stops and reaches down to run his fingers through her fur for some comfort through this uncomfortable topic. 

 The subject of Melody has always been a touchy one.  He dated her in high school, and we were all pretty good friends for most of our childhood. I really liked her for him, actually. Until she broke his heart when we all graduated and ran off to college, leaving him in the dust and I was the one who was left to clean up the mess. The mess being Daniel because he was.. A full blown mess. He would never admit that, though. But what can you expect when you get your heart broken for the first time? I kind of get it. He has always been and always will be my brother, and I’ll always be there for him. No matter what. Which naturally means I’ll always harbor a severe distaste for her, even if I know I don’t have to worry about seeing her ever again.

“This has everything to do with her. You haven’t been able to make it past the first day with a girl since you broke up. It’s been what? six years?” I shoot him a pointed glare. He stops pacing and crosses his arms, waiting for whatever else I have to say.

“Have you considered that trying to get to know someone while eating food is actually incredibly awkward? Or is this really just about the monstrous salad?”

“She also wanted to go for a walk after dinner.” He defends. The sigh I let out.. My God. “Why would I wanna go for a walk when I stand all day at work?” 

He cannot be serious right now. The weakest arguments known to man.

“You’re an active guy, Daniel. Why wouldn’t you want to go for a walk? Doesn’t Linda always go on about your golf arms or whatever?” 

“No, that’s completely different, and you know Linda is the love of my life.” he smiles wide, his tongue poking out just beyond his teeth. 

“Right. So what other red flags did she have?” I dig a little more. 

“Okay, well, she tried to kiss me?”

“GASP.” I feign shock. “She wanted to kiss you? How very dare she. Daniel, that’s absolutely insane. It’s not like you guys went out on a date or anything.” 

“I don’t wanna talk about this anymore.” he plops himself back down on the couch beside me, his shadow following him until she perches her head on his knee. I swear, when he’s here, it's like I don’t exist. “Tell me about poking girl. How’s that going?” He lays his head back and pulls his trucker hat down over his eyes. 

“Good. Project is good. I still can’t ever tell if she likes me or not. We bicker and banter all day long. It’s entertaining as hell for me. Then, there are some moments where she acts like a sweet, normal girl. But most of the time, it's just bickering.” I take a swig of my beer. “I gave her a nickname to get under her skin, and she makes this face every time I say it. It's very.. Samantha from Bewitched.” I swallow my laugh down with another sip. 

“Whaddya call her?” he asks with a smirk, eyes poking out from underneath the brim.

“Birdie.”

“Birdie? Why on earth does that get under her skin?”

“Dunno.” I shrug. “But it does. And I take sick enjoyment out of irritating the fuck out of her.” I set my empty beer back down on my coffee table. 

A maniacal laugh escapes him. Clutching stomach, he bends forward. I start to wonder if he got high before he came over because what the hell is so funny?

“Oh god.” He wipes a tear from his eye and rights himself on the couch. “So you think she’s cute, huh?” 

“I mean.. I.. have eyes, yeah?” I answer with confusion heavily present in my tone. “But we don’t get along. As in cannot go five minutes without bickering, don’t get along.”

“You always did like em’ psychotic, Sam. None of us are stupid.” he chuckles.. to himself because I am not laughing. 

“No, I don’t!”

“Right, and Chelsea was what? Totally normal? You didn’t listen to a single one of us on that one, and we all told you.”  I forgot about her. The girl I dated right before ‘she who shall not be named.’ We saw each other for only a few months but what a whirlwind it was. We went to a concert an hour away, and she ran off with one of the roadies. A fricken roadie? Left me there to get home by myself, considering, yep, she drove. But again, she was hot, so what was I to do?

“Hey now! She wasn’t.. that bad.” I say innocently.

“Right, that’s what you always say. Sam – I never take advice from anyone – Kiszka.” 

“Yeah, alright, keep laughing. As if I’d take advice from ‘One Date Daniel’.” I elbow him in my defense. “Besides, I’m not sure I have much to worry about. Once the project is over, I won’t have to see her again unless we actually do well.”

I get up and head to the kitchen to retrieve another beer from the fridge, and my own dog doesn’t even glance up at me. She just rests peacefully by Daniel’s side. I open the drawer to the left and pick up the bottle opener, and pop the top. I take a long drink before I reenter the living room.

“I uhh, actually the receptionist at the Boston Globe is really cute. Her name is Daisy. We hit it off a bit when I was there last.” I point to the flowers laid on the shelf. “I stopped by the farmer’s market after work and picked up some daisies. Thought I might ask her out tomorrow.”

“Daisies for Daisy. Real creative, Sam.”

“Hey!”

“How’s Birdie gonna feel about that?” he inquires. I pick up the flowers from where they rest and give them a light sniff. 

“Oh, she’ll hate it. She already chirped me about hitting on Daisy last time we were there. Said something about ‘it's easier watching teenagers flirt.’ or whatever.” I set them back down and take up my spot on the couch. 

“Yeah, you never did have any game.” He tips his corona back, finishing the remaining liquid and setting it on the coffee table.

“You say that like your game is any better.” I shove his shoulder.

“I may be ‘One Date Daniel,’ but at least I get dates.” he chides, linking his fingers together with a crack of his knuckles in front of him and placing them behind his head.

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Chapter Four

Chapter Six

Masterpost | Taglist (or reply and let me know if you want to be added!)

Other fics / one shots are here

Taglist bestiees! (I missed you all week and i'm so glad that we're back together again 🫶🏻 I hope you enjoy the chapter!!)

@gvfsstardust , @myleftsock , @mindastreamofcolours , @dont-go-home-without-me , @literal-dead-leaf , @lizzys-sunflower , @mackalah , @klarxtr , @ourlovesdesire , @threadofstars , @edgingthedarkness , @writingcold , @takenbythemadness , @i-love-gvf , @ladywhimsymoon , @earthgrlsreasy , @peaceloveunitygvf , @violet-hayes , @musicspeaks , @anythingforjtk

[drgstrcowboi]

random modern outsiders hcs pt. 2

it’s just too funny not to imagine what they’d be like today.

Darry

reluctantly took the whole gang to Barbenheimer and unconvincingly pretended to hate every second of it

listens to NPR religiously on his way to work and secretly carries his lunch in a New Yorker tote turned inside out so he doesn’t seem like a sissy

thinks it would be prudent to put solar panels on the house to save money on the electric bill

Sodapop

still uses BeReal and obnoxiously stages the photos every single time

uses crest whitening strips way more than 9 out 10 dentists recommend

got into online sports betting because of Steve and actually wins a surprising amount of money doing it

Ponyboy

it was his idea to go to Barbenheimer and he tried unconvincingly to seem more interested in Oppenheimer but fell asleep 30 minutes in

has a very aesthetic desk that harkens back to the peak of studyblr complete with one of these cute little silicone duck lamps and stabillo highlighter sets

listens to the 1975 and is internally conflicted about liking the music bc of matty healy’s politics

Steve

still uses reddit and is actually excited about twitter rebranding to x

has one of those basic white boy pine tree tattoos on his forearm but it kinda looks good on him

collects air jordans and never wears any of them ever

Two-Bit

loves theo von and listens to his podcast after discovering him on TikTok

goes to open mic nights and tries stand-up comedy in hopes of going viral but never prepares his material in advance

has the absolute most chaotic notes app you’ve ever seen in your whole life and he reads from it at open mic and one time accidentally started reciting his grocery list

Johnny

planted the idea of Barbenheimer in Pony’s head bc he talked incessantly about the Barbie movie for weeks

has been contemplating a septum piercing for a few years and even got Dallas to take him to the tattoo parlor to get it done only to chicken out at the last minute

keeps his white Air Force Ones absolutely pristine with a magic eraser and walks funny to keep from creasing them

Dallas

is blocked by most US senators on Twitter for cyberbullying them with poorly edited memes riddled with spelling errors

actually enjoyed the Barbie movie more than Oppenheimer and tries convincingly to make it seem the other way around

watched Dahmer on Netflix with Pony and Johnny and got really grossed out by every single episode

[silent-raven13]

On Wednesdays we wear pink

Pavtri happily showing Gwen his update vlog on his life: Hehehe, look I totally added this cute cat holding a cup of Chai character on the side! I'm loving this new feature for Spdr So-City app! Lyla is a genius. -Lyla heard this went she sent a happy chibi sticker in his Smartphone being pleased by the new update-

Gwen saw his socials being completely customize: Wow, I just put a black background filter with white fonts, the bright white hurts my eyes at night. -Pav's background had a colorful Mandala pattern and his profile picture being updated-

Pavtri: Awe, no cool posters? No Barbie. Dats pretty boring... it's giving basic!

Gwen fake gasps: Not you calling me basic! I got no time to go all web design like you!

Pavtri: But it's so much fun. Lyla made it like Myspace, very old school but better and advanced!

Gwen: Myspace? Wow, that's so crazy! I wasn't even there when dat happen.

Pavtri giggles: Me neither. Anyway, I'm seeing everyone's page and some of them had already updated their page! -Showing Gwen of their close friends' So-City pages- I really like Peni's

Gwen nodded: Yeah, I think her's is pretty sweet. -Her blue eyes spotted Hobie wearing pink along with Miles- Ohh looks like the love birds are here.

Miles holding his boyfriend's hand with a smile on his face: Hey guys, what's up!

Pavtri: OMB, you two look so cute in pink! What's the occasion?

Hobie shrugs: On Wednesdays we were pink! -This made Miles laugh-

Gwen caught the joke and giggle: Ohhh I get you.

Pavtri looks confused: What? Is that a thing?

Miles: You never watched Mean Girls?

Pavtri: No! What is dat? Wait, I don't think my world has that... maybe... ugh, curses multidimensional changes!

Hobie chuckles: Neither my world. Sunflower was joking around with Ganks and I was miffed.

Miles: I had to explain to him about some Mean Girls joke since Danika, Ganke's girl loves that movie. We always watch it when she's in the mood for it. Anyway me and Hobie watched it, and he thought it would be funny to wear pink since today is Wednesday.

Hobie: Movie was okay. Not my cup of tea. Found the jokes tasteless.

Gwen: I never knew she would like Mean Girls then again, she does like Heather.

Hobie arched his eyebrow: What's that one about?

Miles rub his chin: It's an 80s movie and I think you'll like it. Same concept three mean girls name Heather and a girl name Veronica. Veronica like this bad boy and they kill the main Heather, it's focus on toxic love? -He eyes Gwen thinking he got the movie-

Gwen: Kinda. There's a lot going on.

Hobie didn't look pleased: I can't stand Bullies, Sunflower.

Miles: Then maybe you'll like But I'm just a cheerleader. -he knows his boyfriend has a complex taste in movies. Sometimes he criticize the shit out one if he doesn't like it and he rarely watches them. If anything he mostly stick to Horror/thriller or psychological films. Anything that he can dissect. Comedy is always a hit or miss, he did find Hangover assuming.-

Pavtri whines: I wanna see Mean Girls! Can we have a movie night to watch!

Miles: Sure! It's a cult classic!

Gwen: Maybe we should watch Rocky Horror Picture Show, too. I know, you haven't watched it yet.

Hobie gasps at his Sunflower: LUV, you never saw it! -Now that's one of his favorite movies-

Miles: Sorry, bae! I never felt ready to watch it... I dunno doesn't-

Hobie cut him off: No, we're gonna watch it! You'll find it amazing! In my world, we do a full blown show and wreak havoc on the streets all for Anarchy! We'll watch it tonight!

Gwen: Maybe we can do Saturday? I'm free that time.

Pavtri looks at his schedule: Me too!

Miles nodded: Same.

Hobie: Alright, Saturday. At your place, luv?

Miles agreed: Sure, I'll let Danika know. She loves that movie like gurl will make a Mean Girls party. I wouldn't be surprise if we have to dress up.

Pavtri's eyes gleam: I still have my Barbie shirt! We can all wear pink!

Gwen: I totally want to be Janis.

Miles: Hahaha, I'll let ya know.

Hobie kisses his boyfriend's cheek: Luv, you would have to wear the Christmas outfit. -His body turns even more brighter and sparkling hearts appeared-

Pavtri blushes: Opp! I dunno what that means but by the looks of it, it gotta be dirty!

Gwen cracks up seeing Miles' shocking face: Hahaha, Miles have to do the dance and wear knee high boots!

Miles flick his boyfriend's forehead: BONK! Go to Horny Jail! -he huffs-

Hobie whines and begs for his sweet Sunflower to wear the outfit, but Miles ignores him. Gwen had to show a picture to Pavtri about the outfit and dance scene so he understood. Of course, the two were teasing Miles to do it, too.