#that's a tomato ketchup btw

[woobab]

Tomato Sauce Woobab Tomato Sauce

"Tomato... sauce... huh? The real question is, what kind of tomato sauce are we talkin'...?" -🧁

[dan-crimes]

I gotta complain abt being a picky eater here for a sec cuz I'm lookin @ all this stuff on the breakfast menu and there's always the SAME ingredients in all these SAME food items and it would be SO much easier if I could just order food without having to think of all the stuff I DON'T want on my food cuz I always gotta put in so much effort to look into every single ingredient in every since food item that I order bcuz I DON'T LIKE MOST FOODS !!! SMHH !!

[miserye]

why is there salsa on my side of the fridge

[s-ccaam-era-crepe]

..…. I hate them so fucking much waltz

me when. me when i uhhh. me when stgrawberry

me when strawberry 👎👎👎👎

[emo-batboy]

Depression meals Battinson has made himself at least once while unsupervised to the shock and horror of Alfred

(Alfred has to sleep at some point. that’s when Bruce decides to wreak havoc and make these barely edible monstrosities)

(Btw he’s vegetarian, fucking fight me)

Pepper jack cheese between two seaweed sheets

Uncooked ramen dipped in the seasoning packet

Ready rice with cold tofu

Spoonfuls of peanut butter

Instant grits with one slice of American cheese

Pop tart dipped in hot chocolate

Spaghetti noodles with no other ingredient than a mountain parmesan, didn’t even put salt in the water

“Technically bread” (water and flour, microwaved…he was having a really bad day)

Bread, cheese, ketchup, microwave = pizza

Cream cheese and jelly sandwich

Vegan hot dog microwaved without a plate. He picked it up from the microwave with a piece of white bread and ate it just like that. No dirty dishes

kraft mac and cheese with one single raw asparagus

Various little kiddie-themed smoothie shots

Dry cereal

Cheddar cheese wrapped in a flour tortilla

Vegan dinosaur nuggets (microwaved, tho he tried to cook it in his hot coffee once, it didn’t work)

Frozen snap peas straight from the bag, unthawed

Tomato soup with cheez-its sprinkled on top

Tried to make a meal completely out of vitamin supplements once, based entirely on the exact amount of nutrients you need in a day

A family-sized bag of generic brand corn chips

Hard boiled eggs (they were supposed to be soft-boiled) and paprika

Blueberry bagel, toasted, no butter

Cold chicken noodle soup in one of those paper cartons from the corner store (it gave him food poisoning)

Microwave grilled cheese

Cucumber rolls (cucumber slices he rolled in microwave rice)

Leftover cake washed down with a protein shake

A hunk of mozzarella cheese, microwaved

Frozen Garlic bread (it’s actually good like that, he swears)

Four 5-hour energy shots to make a 20-hour energy (his heart rate didn’t go back to normal for two days)

Fruit snacks squished between two slices of wheat bread

Tried to dry scoop protein powder once, worked about as well as the cinnamon challenge

Pistachios with the shells (it was an accident. He did not notice)

Refried refried beans (for protein)

Handfuls of mushy, room temperature blueberries

Tofu block cut up with a spam slicer and dipped in mustard

[cheezitofthevalley]

If you had to listen to a single album for the rest if your life, which one would it be? 👁️ Maybe explain why, too, if you'd like!

(btw don't bother with giving a blinkie if you're not feeling good, pls take care of yourself and i hope you can rest a ton soon! :3)

omg I love this question and hate it at the same time.

it wouldn't be my favorite, because I rather them exist only in loving memory than get old from hearing them too much. probably something long, with some good instrumentals. complex, but still calming.

maybe Dots And Loops (expanded edition) by Stereolab. It's a bit of a mess, almost two hours long, full of weird tracks too odd to be ambient but too empty to be anything else. also some lovely vocals. ooo actually I prefer their album Emperor Tomato Ketchup (also expanded lol). similar but more rock. And Then Nothing Turned Itself Inside-Out by Yo La Tengo is also a contender. If I had to choose a proper rock album, I'd probably go with Mellon Collie And The Infinite Sadness (Deluxe, obviously) by the Smashing Pumpkins.

On the other hand, I'm a sucker for jazz. Literally any Duke Ellington or Miles Davis compilation. My best friend would pull her hair out if she knew this, but I'd choose jazz over classical any day.

...just realized I put way too much thought into this. Good question tho.

And I'm absolutely finding you something. Here's what the Oracle has given me:

[cosmo-production]

mario + rabbid inccorect quotes but i brought back rabbid yoshi; BTW were still going by initals so there RY now

mario: Well, well, well, if it isn’t the consequences of my actions.

RR: What did you two do? RM: mario: RR: You’re not in trouble, I just need to know if I have to lie to the police again or not.

mario: Watcha doin? edge: Stealing my neighbour’s cat. mario: Scandalous. mario: Can I help?

RY: Hello, I'm RY. I work at a shop now. Here to help. Look, they gave me a badge with my name on it in case I forget it. Very helpful, as that does happen.

mario: What are you talking about RR? You love it here! RR: I'm not sure I do, I think I've just developed Stockholm syndrome.

RP: Hey RY, I’ve got an idea for how to solve this. RY, pulling out a shotgun: Yeah? RP: Wh- No! That’s not the idea, RY!

peach: RY, I am questioning your sanity… luigi: I never questioned it, I knew their sanity was missing from the start.

luigi: look RP, I'm not shaming you but… luigi: Actually yeah, I'm TOTALLY slut shaming you.

RP: Sorry, who are you? peach: Oh, I’m peach. RP: Oh yeah, I’ve heard about you from mario. RP: Are you their friend or something? peach: No. peach: I’m their therapist.

RM: Dom or sub? edge: I guess Domino's, since I don't go to Subway that much. Don't see why you'd put them in the same category though.

luigi: So don't panic but one of us is possessed by an owl…. edge: …. RM: ….. RP: …… RR: ..Who? luigi: That's the thing we don't- Everyone stares at RR

peach: What did you get on your shirt? RP: Rust. peach: From what? RP: Weapons. peach: Time for more adult supervision.

peach: Do you know the ABCs of first aid? edge: A. Bone. Coming out of the skin is very bad.

edge: Remain CALM! slaps RP multiple times

and now a word form the courageous duo mario: Don't break someone's heart, they only have one. edge: Break one of their bones instead, they have 206 of them.

RP: Where did you get that tomato soup? RL: It’s actually a bowl of ketchup I just microwaved.

luigi: Why don't I like this person? peach: I don't know. Maybe it's because they keep stealing your thunder. luigi: Maybe it's because their name is "RY". Don't you find that utterly ridiculous? peach: No. luigi: That's because your name is "peach".

RM, looking at a map: It’s a barren, featureless wasteland out there, isn't it? mario: Other side, RM…

peach: Name something you believed in as a child that you no longer do as an adult. luigi: Myself.

edge: So, luigi is late today. Anyone wanna bet why? =mario: I say they slipped through the subway grate and is having a fight with a terrible mole man. RY: I don't know about that…I think either their alarm clock didn't go off, or they're in line at the bank. RM: Take this more seriously! luigi was clearly taken in their sleep! RR: I bet they tucked themselves into the bed too tightly and got stuck. RL: Maybe they fell into another dimension where they're more interesting…? luigi arrives luigi: Sorry I'm late - there was a problem at the bank. RY, clapping their hands in excitement: HOT DAMN!

RM: RL said I was their second favorite person, and I was bummed, but then they said RP is third. They have no favorite person. They’re holding the position open.

peach: What do you do when someone offers you drugs? RP: Take them! RL: Punch them in the neck! luigi: Say thank you! RM: Offer them more drugs to assert dominance! peach: … peach: No.

mario: Are you good? luigi: In what sense? mario: Generally. luigi: Oh, definitely not.

peach:*working in her garden edge: *put money on her lap* how do i say leave me alone midnite in flowers!?

peach: Awww, why don't you like cats, edge? They're just snuggly buddies! They have toe beans! They make a little blep! What's not to love?? edge: I don't know your highness, I just prefer to be conscious instead of dead on the floor. peach: edge: I'm ALLERGIC.

luigi: Why do humans have different blood groups? RY: So mosquitoes can enjoy different flavors.

edge, reading a recipe: Beat three eggs? RM: It means like in hand-to-hand combat. edge: Ohhhh- luigi: Both of you get out of this kitchen.

luigi: Ow! peach: What’s wrong? luigi: I have this weird pain right above my eyebrow. peach: It’s called a stress headache. I got my first one when I was 1ST crowned.

mario: My friends say I'm the most charismatic out of the group. RP: Well, you always have a smile on your face. mario: Thank you. RP: RP: What drugs do you take?

peach: Wow, great work on the Halloween decorations. Where did you get the fake skeletons? RP: Fake?

RY, holding in their laughter: Hey, how do you ask a glass of water what it’s doing? edge: A glass of water is an inanimate object. Therefore, it's incapable of having a thought process or understanding basic human language. RY: RY: Water you doing?

edge:if i die you can have what little i own peach: "if" you die??? edge: my life is fueled by spite, spite against my creator peach: okay time for another therapy session

RL: Truth or dare? RR: Truth. mario: How many hours have you slept this week? RR: RR: Dare. mario: Go to sleep. RR: I don't like this game.

RL: Woah dude, premarital handholding? That’s just not cool or groovy.

edge: You are a spineless twit! RP: You cannot talk to me that way, I am your superior! edge: A six-year-old girl could talk to you that way! RP: Yes, because that would be adorable. edge: No, it's because you are a five-year-old girl and there's a pecking order.

RY: mixing different alcoholic beverages together RL: What are you making? RY: A mistake.

peach, about to leave the house: Don’t spend all day watching YouTube, okay? RL: I FORGE MY OWN PATH!!

the rabbids trying to cook without peaches help RP: How would you like your pancakes? RL: Plain. RM: With sprinkles! luigi: Chocolate chips. RY: Potatoes. RL, RM, and luigi look at RY RY: What? They're good.

RM: bro… I’m bleeding… RL: Oh god… what’s your blood type?! RM: B positive… RL: I’m trying to but you’re bleeding-

game night or atleast how the spark hunters did it edge: I’ve invited you here because I crave the deadliest game… RM, nodding: Knife Monopoly. edge: I was actually going to play Russian roulette, but now I'm really interested in whatever knife Monopoly is. Don't worry shes learning

mario: If you get in trouble, I'm gonna be like… a lawyer to you. Ok? RP: Okay. later peach: RP! Sit down on the chair, you're in trouble. mario, whispering: Deny everything. RP, loudly: That isn't a chair.

RM: I bet you can’t make a sentence without the letter “A”! RR: You thought you just did something there, didn’t you? Well, sorry to burst your bubble, but numerous sentences could be constructed without employing the first letter of the English lexicon. RY: ten buried zero found

[dr-jem-nutcase]

MvA: The M Files, take-a-peek pt. 3

For starters, thanks to all the likes, shares, & comments. I hope you've been enjoying this

Chapter 3

fake foods from Counterfeit Chemicals: a lot of fast food joints & every other generic food product in America. At least it tastes good...a lot of times. Like, Taco Bell is in no way authentic Mexican food but I LUV it 🌮

This place was Old Man Carl's in the movie and the same company that later brought BOB that ill-fated hotdog stand in San Francisco

That chart lol

Root beer flavored spinach. Sounds gross. I'd also be deathly afraid to try it. Reminds me of the late 1990s/early 2000s when Heinz made purple ketchup, which was NOT a success. But nowadays, different flavored snacks & desserts (particularly ice cream) can be hits every now and then. fake foods (or Old Man Carl's) could've been on the brink of creating a new trend! Okay, moving on

In case anyone has a hard time reading some of the text in the second panel, it says, "it doesn't taste any different from a real tomato". Sorry for the kerfuffle

Designed or created?

Btw, there IS actually a limited edition ranch flavored ice cream

Ranch-flavored tomato. Sounds great with a salad or some types of pizzas

Red 7 lol

This would be. mildly. terrifying. Wth was even in either one of those foods?

Runs away & claims BOB is homicidal. So judgmental & assuming! *fake shocked face*

How'd he grow an eye out of all this?

BOB's quite eloquent for being a "newborn"

Ooh! Monger's a sergeant now!

Eating the building isn't too different from both Blob movies but a much lighter tone than eating people alive. I never saw the newer one but I watched the OG one years ago. A guy walks into a doctor's office agonizing in pain and fear because his arm's covered in this goo that's eating up his arm and in a few minutes the guy is gone before the doctor could amputate the arm. Very G rated

Welp, so much for eating a police car (movie) or a city block (video game)

The third soldier's mouth is missing

Evidently they eat lead. Sorry, wrong story!

So BOB's eye is just part of his anatomy? Not some specially made artificial eyeball?

Like Link's chapter, this is a total jump away from the origin story in the movie. It's a good explanation for the genetically altered tomato & chemically altered dessert topping but a slightly censored telling of BOB's origin. That explosion on the two scientists was a bit satisfying. Again, kids' book *sigh*

Monger's hands are black

So...BOB named himself?

Big lips Monger isn't real. Big lips Monger can't scare you

"Lots of people don't have brains...a politician..." DW, is that supposed to be a burn? Hot dang! Let's get out some aloe vera, cold water, and maybe a trip to the burn unit at the nearest hospital

Some day, son. Some day, you will contribute to society. Just not today

I'm kinda surprised that this building hasn't toppled on top of anyone. Istg, Monger isn't afraid of anything

Now where's BOB gonna go? Also, is Link still on dry ice? Will BOB be on dry ice too? At the end of the OG Blob movie, the blob is frozen/encapsulated in ice and dropped off in the artic/antarctic. Did Monger go in this direction? Capture a monster and then freeze it like Han Solo? Hopefully that monster prison will be in the making soon. Like, REALLY soon. You can only freeze and store so many monsters! Btw, can you imagine trying to freeze the Invisible Man?

Again, this piece of work isn't mine. It all belongs to you know who. See you soon!

[edtriestowrite]

Yjh and Kdj as autistic persons (headcanons)

This was inspired from @dontheckinswear post! Btw, sorry if there's any mistake!

Yjh's hyperfixation is swords and interesting ways to kill people, and maybe the way the human mind works

kdjs hyperfixation is obviously twsa

yjh probably comes randomly to lgy (i BELIEVE that they have a good relationship where they infodump about their hyperfixations and talk about kdj), ysa, or kdj and it's like "i will infodump about the most interesting ways to kill people, my current hyperfixation, if that's okay"

yjh, kdj and lgy are the autistic, lgbtq family (yes, i do have the headcanon that lgy is aromantic, for some reason i don't know yet)

kdj would randomly enter into the house and read twsa AGAIN, and then go to yjh to infodump and getting excited about it (kdj to yjh, giggling: "i will infodump about twsa for the next hours" yjh, sighing: "here we go again... Yes, you can infodump about it."

kdj bought sound canceling headphones that match with yjh's

•yjh is constantly telling kdj to do not have his music so loud, even when he's with his headphones on (even though yjh does the same thing. Let him be he's worried about his husband)

kdj randomly asks yjh to just sit on his chest (for pressure therapy)

and then yjh asks for physic contact from kdj all the time. Only with kdj and biyoo.

yjh is more of, like, expressing with images of the autistic creature. He loves that thing.

for yjh, is an obligation to cook kdj's comfort food at least once a week, and even keeps the ketchup, tomato, and anything tomato-related (???) away from kdj and kdj's food as well

they compete in who makes the best thesis on their shared hyperfixations (Yjh, showing his powerpoint and thesis of 40 pages of the studio ghibli's art: "you cannot defeat me." Kdj, with his 55 page thesis, multiple powerpoints and with a GODDAMn WHOLE PODCAST about studio ghibli's metaphors, smirking)

when kdj gets overwhelmed, he just goes away from the world, and yjh helps him by wrapping him into a blanket like a burrito

when yjh gets overwhelmed, he just goes nonverbal (is not too different anyways), and only communicates with kdj via notes

hsy is their adhd bestfriend

[sualne]

Did you know crocs favorite food is crocodile meat and tomatoes[

(His least favorite is ketchup btw)

yea :D

[fieldtomatoes]

here's my lesbian experience with cooking dinner every night this for this week btw:

Tonight - roast chicken, crispy potatoes, peas, homemade cranberry sauce

Monday - pesto asparagus goat cheese pasta with leftover chicken

Tuesday - strawberry avocado goat cheese spring greens salad and garlic bread

Wednesday - frozen individual tourtières with home canned fruit ketchup and caesar salad

Thursday - burritos with citrus spiced chicken, onions and peppers, and tomato refried black beans

Friday - takeout sushi

Saturday - hot dogs

[fastsnax-drive-thru]

I had an idea for a bugsnak while studying for finals (as you do) and now I bestow it to you: a giant bread bowl. I'll leave the bug side up to you, I'm fine with whatever so long as they have a large round bit that can be turned into a hollowed out sourdough loaf and filled with soup. Great job on my rouse request BTW!

Order up!

Name: Panerapede™ (don't sue me)

Bug: millipede

Flavor: Reacts differently to different sauces and is filled with different soups just like sprinklepedes frosting will change. (Had drawn, didnt save)

Ketchup = tomato soup

Ranch = cream chowder

Chocolate = chocolate fondue

Hot sauce = spicy tortilla soup

Cheese = cheddar broccoli soup

Peanut butter = curry

If your soup! So fast it'll cool itself.

[faetaiity]

can you write about the red one eating a burger (lettuce, no tomatoes, there’s also onions and ketchup and mustard and cheese) and fries(ketchup as a sauce) with a coca cola as a drink with no ice he also should have chicken nuggets as a side order with barbecue sauce

I'm fucking shitting myself laughing, Eighth, what the fuck is this monstrocity

Also, wtf dym 'red one' his name is raph since now I know ur talking about him and not red guy from DHMIS, you sad excuse of a drunk new york sewer rat

btw ur days r numbered now that I know ur tumblr

watch ur back, whore. /lh Onto this clusterfuck that my friend wants ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Raph pulls up into the Mcdonalds drive thru in the turtle tank

"Can I get a..... uhhhhhhh....." he trails off, forgetting what he wanted to eat until like two minutes later

"Can I get a Burger, Lettuce, Onions, Ketchup, Mustard and Cheese, no tomatoes, a large fry, Chicken nuggets with BARBECUE SAUCE, and a coca cola with no ice" he says

"Pull up, hoe" a voice eerily similar to Leo says

He pulls up and takes the food, driving away before he paid

He committed thievery of food

He went into an alleyway, ate the food like some starving rat, and a few days later died of food poisoning

Because Meat Sweats wanted revenge ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What was happening while I was writing this horrible clusterfuck

[shadesofnavy]

So any cooking attempts that aren't meat or pancakes are a disaster for Keith, right? May we hear about some of his more memorable disasters?

Well there's a few... long post ahead so beware. We'll start with the one of the sandwich. You'd think they're the easiest to make, right? Meat, cheese, some ketchup, mustard, lettuce, tomato, olives maybe if desired. That's exactly what Keith did. But you know how the ham packages always have the image of a sandwich with an absurd amount of meat in it? Well, when Cherry came home early one afternoon from an early day shift, Keith wanted to make her something to eat. Just a simple sandwich she asked for. Then about five minutes later he comes up to her with this huge sandwich that has about four inches of ham in it with a shitton of cheese between each strip. He used about half the package of ham for only one sandwich (it was a MEGA pack btw). Oh and he used one of those half foot Italian sub rolls too. He said he wanted to make it look like the package. Cherry winced in physical pain at his loving and disastrous gesture. They ended up splitting it in half because she couldn't eat it all by herself. Then he tried to make sunny side up eggs one morning besides some pancakes and sausage (they were the only edible parts of the meal, how is this guy only good at those two things). The top of the eggs ended up cooking completely and the bottom burnt and stuck to the pan. Pico did not have fun cleaning that one up. Another one is he tried to make a beef stew with biscuits over them, and it was all going good... until he poured the batter and it started pouring out of the pot in the oven midway to cooking. Less batter or bake them aside next time buddy. You slept on the couch for that one. Last but not least the disaster that had him prohibited from baking when he was 17: It was 1:45am on a weekday of his mother's birthday. Man was up at that hour baking a Betty Crocker chocolate cake. Why so late you ask? He was on the phone with Cherry all evening and left his homework due the next day for later that night, ended up speed doing it, and realized that he forgot to bake his mom's birthday cake shortly after his parents went to bed at 10pm. So what our beloved idiot does is start making the batter at that hour, all going well, until he puts it in the oven and turns it up higher than the instruction box says so because he needs it to "bake quicker." He ends up burning the cake entirely somehow, calling Cherry in a panic, setting off the fire detector and happy early morning birthday Mrs. Burlington! (He was grounded for a week and wasn't allowed to call Cherry past 8pm)

[tomatoluvr69]

I’m not joking about my condiments thing btw I’ve made ketchup from scratch out of tomatoes I smoked…I’ve grown mustard seeds on my porch and ground them to paste

[dragpinkman]

look at this blooming hawthorn i found on my walk in someones yard, so pretty :3 (the berries are edible on these btw. you can make a tomato free ketchup replacement out of them! doing that this year)