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internal-bleating · 2 years ago

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Monsters Vs Aliens isn't that bad and people should give it more of a chance and Susan Murphy is one of the best female protagonists ever actually

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!!Long Post Warning!!

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People seem to collectively hate Monsters Vs Aliens and idk why. My fam and I have always loved it and me and my dad used to always quote it all the time.

Now, is it better than Megamind? No way. Megamind is a masterpeice of cinema and is very much obviously the superior movie. But is Monsters Vs Aliens THAT horrible? I really don't think so.

I watched it again recently for old times sake and sentimental nostalgia and I really do think it's kind of underated. Is the animation style kind of ugly? First off, ugly and pretty are very subjective, second, yeah I can see why some might find the character design kinda ugly with their weird porportions and Susan's huge fucking eyes. But I really don't think it's THAT bad.

Also people seem to rag on the plot a fair amount as well but the plot and message are both actually pretty awesome if you ask me.

Susan is SUCH a good protagonist ok???

Gonna share my appreciation with ya'll for her.

I know there's probably people out there that view her as annoying and whinny but like??? Give her a fucking break! The girl literally starts off as the most basic average young adult white girl you've ever seen. Like fr she was probably on the more populer side at school, was definitly on the richer side when it comes to the middle class, seemed to live in a very cookie cut suburd neighborhood, and was going to marry one of the most painfully boring and typical white dudes ever. Like this girl was DEFINITELY one of those white girls you always see youtubers do impressions of n shit.

And by PURE CHANCE and coincidence, she gets hit by a meteor on her wedding day (Also can we talk about that hysterically anticlimactic "Oof!" she lets out when she got hit and her mom just brushing off her words when she says she got hit my a meteorite like "yep, everyone feels like that" as if her daughter wasn't fucking COVERED in dirt and ash) and it completely derails her very normal life.

Can we talk about Derek for a sec tho? Like what a fucking selfish jackass! The guy KNEW how excited Susan was about Paris and yet he only cares about himself and continuesly proves he doesn't give a shit about her enough to inconveiniance himself for her AT ALLLLL. Unlike Susan who was completely ready to forget about her Paris honeymoon for him. Like I bet you if Susan hadn't had this whole thing happen to her she'd have the most miserable loveless mariage with this dude and would be in denial of it for YEARS and keep trying to tell herself he cares but probably won't realize he doesn't until way way later. This guy was going to definitly waste a good chunk of her life and leave her feeling so so incredibly lost...

She's confused and scared(seriously her hair turned white in miliseconds becuase of how distressed she was) as everyone runs away screaming and she tries in vain to calm everyone down and things only get more disorienting as helicopters and fucking military men start attacking her and she doesn't understand what she's done wrong. And we also get some foreshadowing of how strong and how much potential she has with her newfound strength yet she doesn't know that yet. A few soldiers attempt to pull her down with ropes around her arm and at first she struggles against it but as SOON as she sees Derek is in danger she's like "Hey leave him alone! Don't hurt him!" and pulls herself free with incredible ease!

So then, Susan is very understandably freaking out and panicking when she wakes up in Area 51, yelling and screaming that she doesn't belong here as she's up until now most likely never experienced such and confusing and stressful situation. And honestly I feel SO SORRY for her that whole thing must've been so overwhelming and scary. We kind of get a timeskip after she sits in the corner of her cell but I bet you she was having a breakdown for the whole first week.

Small note, the government changed her name to Ginormica. Like bruh...

Then villain introduction yada yada skipping ahead a little bit.

Quick mention of the BANGER scene where the President plays Axel F for an alien robot. One of my fave scenes in the whole movie fr.

Also mentioning how Susan is SO SO determined to get out of monster prison.

So Susan and the other monsters are tasked with fighting an alien robot in exchange for their freedom. Susan is like "Oh yes! I'm gonna see my family again!" and I don't think the thought of fighting a robot has fully sunk in yet becuase she's way more focused on the prospect of seeing her lover again.

And THEN she sees this MOUNTAIN of a fucking robot that actually kind of scared me as a kid, and it finally sinks in. They want her to fight THAT. She was not expecting it to be so fucking big. Do these people actually expect her to fight this thing?? She starts freaking out again because like?? HOW??? How is she supposed to fight that thing?? She's never fought before!

Then big action scene, comedic moments with the trio, Susan runs away from the robot scared out of her fucking mind as this huge hulking metal monster aggressively persues her. And we get an actually really funny joke where she's clinging onto the edge of a roof, scared she's gonna fall only to fall like, two inches onto her feet when her grip slips and she's like "Oh. Right. Haha.".

Monster shenanigans again, She's on the bridge and continuing to get as far away from the robot as she can when she sees a car crash happen and reflexively stops in her tracks. She can clearly see the robot just a short distance away, but instead of continuing to run, she risks closing the gap of distance she's created for herself from the robot and chooses to instead help the people who might possibly be hurt and injured. She tries to warn them even as they run away becuase they are scared of her to get off the bridge before the robot gets to all of them.

Yeah, ok, maybe it's kinda ridiculous how fast the robot closes that distance between it and her but movie logic™ ok???

The robot has her cornered, it opens up a panel with a bunch of rotating teeth, intending to GRIND HER INTO A BLOODY PASTE like can we talk about how horrifying of a situation that is?? You're literal inches from a killer meatgrinder that's angling the bridge you're on so that you slide right into a waiting painful hole of death!

Insectisaurous, another big monster she was at first terrified of, shows up just in time. You see that look of incredible relief on Susan's face as he comes to her rescue, incopasitating the robot and pulling the bridge back to it's correct angle in order to help her get away.

Susan starts frantically asking why this robot is so hellbent on killing her specifically. It's not like she's been trying to attack it this whole time! Like why??? Robot seemingly crushes her in its robot hand but then, she pries its hand back open, the gang watching in awe.

In the struggle, the robot creates a huge hole in the bridge and a couple's car starts to fall into it but Susan stop it! "You're doing great!" "I'm doing EVERYTHING!!!" - ASFDJKLHFSDLAJKHSFDJKFASD

Susan, still thinking about the wellbeing of others, prioritizes getting all these people off the bridge and away from danger. When Bob clears the way somewhat, she yells at the people in their cars to go while still wresting with the robot hand to prevent it from harming any of them.

She's obviously tiring from holding his hand at bay for so so long and knows she can't keep it up forever and that's a scary thought to have cuz she's unsure how she's going to get away from this thing. But then she takes in her suroundings and a plan forms in her head.

Once again, Susan has never had to do this before. She's just winging this and is fighting for her god damn life! She speaks to herself to hype herself up for what she's about to attempt, hoping it will work.

Then BAM! With a determined burst of strength she jumps into action, pushing the robot hand wide open before grabbing the other and pulling the robot towards her, using its weight and topheaviness to make it lose balance and fall forwards. She grabs Link whose out cold btw rn, and carries him to safety, jumping out of the way JUST in time before the robot completely destroyes the bridge where she just was as it falls over.

A peice of the bridge comes down with it and severes its head from the rest of its body, effectively damaging it enough to power it off, permanently. Susan peers over the edge of the collapsed bridge, a smile of relief that the danger has passed and she's still alive spreading across her face. She actually did it!

Villain scene and monolouge, impending doom approaching, time skip,

Susan is excitedly talking to the others as they ride in the plane's cargohold about how "Wow! I can't believe I actually did that!" and she's so so proud of herself and you see Dr. Cockroach and Bob smiling back at her becuase from their POV she's probably glowing so so brightly and looks the happiest they've seen her ever. Her confidence is at skyrocket height right now! And yet, she can't help but long for her old life. She tells them how she's going to find a way to become normal again and that Derek will help her because he loves and cares about her and won't rest until they've fixed this(poor thing doesn't realize how much of a shitstain Derek is yet).

Bob (yeah he's the comic relief but i feel like people greatly underate how honest and genuine he can be like come onnnnnn(also yes I added him to my kinlist idgaf)) is like "Wait but you were just talking about how you're so strong now and how there's not a jar in this world you can't open" and yeah the whole line is played in a comedic light cuz Bob seems to only care about whatever food is in the jar she can't open but I feel like it's a little deeper than that.

After hearing about how great Derek seemingly is, the gang wants to meet him and Susan is like "Yeah sure I'll gladly introduce you guys!" and they all arrive at her home and she looks so happy to be back!!

Her family is kinda wary of the gang but she reassures them they're all chill and introduces them as her new friends, showcasing how far she's come relationshipwise with the three of them(since she was scared of them and found both Bob and Dr. Cockroach gross when they all first met. She legit tried to kill Dr. Cockroach when they first met like wow.)

Another example of Derek not caring, he doesn't show up to welcome her home from prison. Susan runs off to go get him so they can all celebrate together.

The monster gang tries to adjust to society and does their best to be friendly and nice but everyone is still super scared of them and it doesn't go very well...

Susan is SO SO HAPPY to see Derek again! She forgets how big she is and how strong she is in her excitement and Derek is kinda... understandably distressed when she picks him up, swings him around, almost suffocates him and almost crushes him. When Susan realizes this she immediatly apoligizes to him and puts him down.

Derek proceeds to show just how much of a fucking dickwad he is. When he asks her if he expects him to put his whole career on hold to help her, she's like "YES???" like bro this girl was ready to make the sacrifice of her PARIS HONEYMOON that she was VERY VISIBELY LOOKING FORWARD TO for your benifit!! Derek breaks Susan's heart and she's completely at a loss now. Everything feels like a lie. She leaves her home to go off to where she does not know.

Once again, yes, I KNOW it's kind of an impossible reach for the monster trio to show up right then. And ONCE AGAIN, I'm claiming movie logic™.

Bob once again being incredibly blunt and honest. Makes the whole gang face the fact that everyone hates them and doesn't want to be around them.

Heard somone bring up and praise the "We could save every city on the planet and they'd still treat us the way they've always treated us. Like monsters..." and honestly, fucking correct and valid.

They all have that quiet sad moment together.

Link tries to lighten the mood by asking how things went with Derek, the seemingly perfect and accepting loving guy Susan has sung the praises of for her entirety of her time with them in prison(seriously Link's whole response to her talking about him in that one scene way earlier implies she talked about Derek NONSTOP). He and the others do not yet know he's a prick as Susan had just discovered.

Susan finally accepts the fact that he's a selfish jerk as she tells the gang so.

"There was never and us! There was only Derek! Why did I have to get hit by a meteorite do realize that??" - Girl go OFF!!!!

She gets a good old rant out and in the process realizes that she doesn't have to feel lost. She's gonna be just fine without him because she's fucking amazing and has four new awesome friends now. She tells them just how awesome they all are and that none of them have to be accepted by society. They all have a character turning moment where Susan has learned she loves this new her and things are looking real up for the five of them! But then, of course, something has to go wrong.

Galaxar's ship shows up and abducts Susan. Insectosaurus tries to help her again but is hit by a ball of energy from the spaceship's cannon. He lets out the most heartwrenching shriek and we get an actually really sad scene as Susan is pulled into the ship and Link, knowing there's really nothing they can do for her in that moment, rushes over to his friend.

"Don't close those eyes. Don't you DARE close those eyes!" *Insectosaurus's eyes slide shut* "You can't..." - LIKE COME ON THAT WAS FUCKING SADDDDD AAAAAAAAAA

Susan has a confrontation with Galaxar, the villain of this movie. They have a very "You have gotten in my way for the last time" "I don't know who tf you are!" moment.

Susan has a moment of clarity where she's like "Wait, all of this is YOUR fault??" and she realizes that he's the reason her whole life was derailed and why she suffered all this trauma of her wedding day, being taken away from everything she's ever known with no hope of ever seeing her family again, and almost dying in a fight with a robot. He's why her fiance wants nothing to do with her(not defending Galaxar or anything for this cuz he did a lot of horrible shit but he really did her a solid by derailing her life cuz as i've stated before, Derek would have ruined her life in the long term if all this never happened to her).

Galaxar is all smug during this.

"You destroyed San Fransisco, you terrified millions of people, you killed my friend, just to get to me??" - My poor girl really out here still putting other people before her and caring more about them than herself...

Galaxar is so sure he's got the upperhand, so sure he's safe from her becuase of that forcefeild. But nah, Susan is fucking LIVID now and breaks through that forcefeild.

She proceeds to break through every barrier Galaxar puts between himself and her becuase she's learned just how imposing her power is now. She's chases after him through the ship like "I'M GOING TO FUCKING KICK YOUR ASS!!!" and Galaxar is actually genuinly scared of her as he's fleeing.

LIKE YES QUEEN!!!! GET HIS ASS!!! KILL THE BLUE FUCK!!!!

And because we still got a fair amount of run time to go, and because we still need our protagonist to struggle a bit, Galaxar manages to trap Susan in the extraction chamber just as she's about to get him. She's still glaring absolute daggers at him through the glass though. He looks back at her, smug expression returning. She then slams her hands into the glass and it STARTS TO CRACK!!! Galaxar is getting scared again and jumps back but he also commands the computer to begin the extraction process.

Susan is determined to break out and get to the person responsible for everything that has happened to her in the past month, but as the Quantonium is removed from her body, her pounds on the glass get weaker and weaker and soon she's no longer cracking the glass. Her now much smaller hand weakly presses against the glass one last time before the chamber retracts and she's left lying there back at her original size.

And even after all that, and even though Galaxar now towers over in instead of the other way around, she still meets his gaze with her own determined glare.

Side note, I know it's supposed to be a joke and all but im really curious about why exactly Galaxar came to the conclusion of destorying his whole fucking planet.

Also,

"There were innocent people on my home planet before it was destroyed!"

"Well I'm sorry your planet was destroyed..." "Oh don't be. I was the one who destoryed it" - Idk this whole exchange is just really clever to me. Like talk about speedrunning the whole trying to sympathsize with the villain and then discovering they really are just a bad person trope LMAO.

Another big skip,

Link is still mourning Insectosaurus, and both Bob and Dr. Cockroach are unsure what to do. Link takes the intiative right then and there.

"We're not gonna let Insecto die in vain. We're gonna get up there, find Susan, and we're gonna take that alien down!" - HELL YEAH BRO!!!

Skip skip, they get onto the ship, they find Susan(Galaxar was going to throw her into the incenerator. As a pyrophobe, WHAT a horrible way to go out wow), Bob fucking murders somone,

"I can't believe you guys actually came for me ;-;" "Us monsters gotta stick together" - Like holy shit that's so adorable.

Poor Susan isn't sure if she can even call herself one of them anymore becuase she's small again :( (Only thing different is that her hair is still white)

Dr. Cockroach assures her she's still awesome.

Skip again,

Big epic fight scene. Link actually gets to do shit this time and isn't unconscious.

They set the ship to self destruct and the doors to the chamber begin to shut. The gang rushes to reach the doors before they close all the way. They manage to get Susan through the doors right before they shut but the trio isn't so lucky.

The trio urges Susan to leave without them but she doesn't want to.

"You can finally get your old life back..."

"But I don't want me old life back!" - SHE DOESN'T WANNA ABANDON HER FOUND FAM FR!!! She finds a way up to the control chamber where Galaxar is priming the escape pod and intending to leave with the Quantonium.

"Are you crazy?? You could've killed me!" "Then we understand eachother." - fuckin baller line.

Susan demands for him to open up the doors and release her friends but he's like "lmao make me" and then when he goes to climb into the escape pod, she stops him and they have a scuffle that ends with her holding him at gun point like "You better fuckin do it right fucking now buddy!"

"Even if I wanted to I couldn't! That's what happens when you set the ship to selfdestruct!! Now we're all going to die! And there's nothing you can do about it! Sooooooooosan." <- says her name in a very mocking tone.

And Susan is like "Actually I can do something about it" "And the name is Ginormica" *points the gun up and shoots it at the thing holding the Quantonium so it falls on her* - FUCKING BAD ASS!!!!

So Susan is big again, she saves her friends just in time, She jumps off the small platform they were huddled on just as a peice of the ship comes down on top of it, smashing through the floor of the ship. The four of them grab onto eachother and dangle thousands of feet above the ground, Susan clinging on for dear life to the bottom of the ship.

She loses her grip and they all start to fall but they're caught by somone.

Turns out Insectosaurus isn't dead!! He's a butterfly now!!!!!

They all fly away to safety just as the ship's automated computer voice counts down.

Galaxar is frantically pushing buttons on the control panel since the escape pod doesn't work without the Quantonium. He covers his ears and squeezes his eyes shut as the countdown ends.

"Three, two, one."

.................

*distant bird call*

"Hmm, nothing happened, maybe my count wa-" *ship explodes* - This part had me DYINGGGG the first time I saw this movie.

Butterflyosaurus lands before a crowd of cheering people.

Susan's parents are all proud of her.

"Oh Susan, ever since you were a maybe, your dad and I knew that you'd... you know, save the planet from an invasion from outterspace" - Can we talk about how fucking weird this must've been for them??? Like yeah it was scary for Susan, but imagine how her parents must be feeling; like their only child started growing into a giant at her wedding and then she was taken away from them to some place unknown and they didn't hear anything from her after that(bet you the government deleted her birth info and denied she ever existed and was straight up gaslighting them into believing they never had a daughter.) until suddenly their duaghter is on the news becuase she fought a giant alien robot and I wonder if they knew she almost DIED doing it.

Derek shows up then, makes a shitty attempt at apologizing to her- no wait he DOESN'T say he's sorry, nah he doesn't hold himself in the wrong. This fucker.

"Baby I thought long and hard about what I said, and I wanted you to know, I forgive you." "... You forgive... me?" Susan is visibily perplexed at this.

"Yes it's not your fault you got hit by a meteor and ruined everything. In fact you didn't ruin everything. I just got a call from New York. They offered me network! All I gotta do is get an exclusive interview from you!" - Yes, he's only "forgiving her" cuz it benifits him. I cannot believe I saw people in the comments of a video about MvA saying she should've forgave him like ya'll are fucking stupid.

So Susan is like "Oh wow reallY?!?!?! Cool! Hey is the camera still rolling?" And Derek, unaware he's fucked up, says "Of course lol!" So Susan proceeds to break up with him on live television and then flick him up into the air. She also tells Bob to catch him so he doesn't splat onto the pavement.

Bob then tells him off for being a selfish asshole and Derek, now humiliated, tells them to shut the camera off.

and honestly??? FUCKING DESERVED!!! Hope that clip becomes immortalized as a meme and you are forever branded as the idiot who icon monster celebrity Susan Murphy broke up with on live television. also 100% convinced that the group of people on the internet who have a huge thing for giant women hate Derek for turning down having a supersized wife like all of them would KILL for that COME ON BRO!!!!

A slug apparently got turned into a Kaiju in Paris so the gang all fly off into the sunset to go deal with that and the movie ends~ LIKE HELL YEAH SUSAN YOU FINALLY GET TO GO TO PARIS YEAH!!! After all the shit she's been through she deserves at least that.

There's a fair amount of things I didn't mention but I think that if anyone reading this hasn't seen Monsters vs Aliens before, or hasn't seen it in a while, you should give it a watch again/for the first time. You don't HAVE to, but I recommend.

Maybe some of the jokes aged poorly, maybe some of the humor is kind of childish and unfunny, maybe its full of outdated "HEY LOOK THIS MOVIE WAS IN 3D!!!" bits, but I fucking love this movie ok???!?!?!?!?!

It's in no way perfect and in no way one of Dreamworks best films ever but I feel like it isn't necessarily one of their worst ones either.

#monsters vs aliens #dreamworks #susan murphy #the missing link #dr cockroach #bob #insectosaurus #galaxar #this isn't my new hyperfixation i just had some thoughts I wanted to get out #a LOT of thoughts I wanted to get out ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#might reblog some MvA art later tho #little me kind of hyperfixated on it ngl #went through a phase where I obsessed over all the main characters #kept switching faves and all #Link was def by far young me's all time fave #and fr he's so gender

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