#that’s just how the cookie crumbles-
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wanton-votaress · 11 months ago
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I may be a nerd but I wasn’t the one who baked cookies based on my current interests
That was all @existing-is-bothersome
(Even if was a attempt to prove they are superior to me in the kitchen)
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puppyeared · 4 months ago
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horrible truth bomb dropped on my head 20 min ago
#I DIDNT KNOW I DIDNT KNOWWWWW#when i say damn thats crazy its bc i DO think its crazy i think a lot of things are crazy. like how birds have cloacas#or the way ppl draw a five pointed star in different ways and everyone assumes their way of doing it is how everyone does it#my brother is not letting me live this down btw he literally shouted at me like HOW DID YOU LIVE THIS LONG AND NOT PICK UP ON THAT#IDK!!! IDK I THOUGHT SOMETIMES IT COULD BE USED TO EXPRESS GENUINE SHOCK??????#he says its my delivery that makes it sound insincere bc i say it in a monotonous voice which when i think abt it YEAH....#THAT DOES MAKE IT LOOK KINDA BAD IN HINDSIGHT.....#and then i told him i keep a list of phrases that tickle my brain so i can remember to use them in conversation and apparently#most ppl dont do that bc he was like ???? stop doing that??? just let the conversation flow naturally it sounds fake>????#idk man i feel like if i did that and blurted out 'i forgot people find stuff like underwear arousing for some reason' instead of#smth like 'i wonder what kind of ppl find this kind of stuff the bees knees' like i normally do. it would. not go so well.#ALSO THE FLOW CHARTS ARENT NORMAL? i make flow charts before i call the bank or smth so i know what to say#its not just to blend in its also so i dont waste ppls time going uhhhhh as i think of how i put smth into words#its called stalling for time and i dont care if i have to say smth like thats just how the cookie crumbles if it gives me#5 more seconds to process whatever the fuck someone said without letting them think im not paying attention#doodles#diary#sona#puppysona#comics
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cheese-water · 2 years ago
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he is the only funny person on the damn app
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lokh · 1 year ago
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its basket!
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screwpinecaprice · 29 days ago
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I was trying to eat noodles neatly and for some reason I got sad midway. So I drew them messy eating a biscuit and a strawberry to combat sad noodle blues.
#Ugh I could've made it messier though.#I tried looking at how the strawberry juice look as it's getting bitten. But looking at a closeup of a mouth eating is kinda uncomfortable#I would need to be paid to look at that again. I dropped it and just winged it. Lol#Hm. I should've at least looked up how goopy it should look. But eh. Drawings finished.#I heard wild strawberries are sour? But these ARE giant strawberries. So this might be a special special kind of strawberry.#I'm not like other strawberries. 😤🍓 Lol#I can't remember what an actual strawberry taste. People made it look pretty good though.#Then again people also made dragon fruit look tasty and it turned out it just tastes like a very very desaturated pear. Lol#Hmmmm but also then again. They also make cherries look good and I LOVE cherries. 🤷‍♀️#That ain't the giant Crumbl cookie if anyone's wondering. Connie would probably never spend money on a Crumbl. That's a home made biscuit.#Bruh I can't spell biscuit#I watched someone biting on what I think is a Crumbl and they spit it out. And the pieces sounded like concrete as it hit the table 😆😆😆#connverse#connie maheswaran#steven quartz universe#Lion SU#su#steven universe#skedoobles#Ah. Also scribbling this because I needed a break after burning out 3 hours of a commission's allotted time just figuring out what pose#to settle on. So like I only have five hours left to work on their piece. 😬#my shiz#Waitaminuteee in case I unintentionally relayed it wrong. I'm not going to actually just make that allotted commission time just 5 hours no#I recognize not being able to settle a pose for THAT long in a commission is skill issue on my part so I'm not going to carve out 3 hours#Plus at least now I have poses that I *could* make a YCH out of. The body measures are going to be limited however 🤔
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asfodeltide · 2 years ago
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lionheartedmusings · 1 year ago
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"the egg event is going to end" "the egg event went on too long" THERE IS NO EGG EVENT ANYMORE, THIS IS JUST LIFE. THIS IS JUST THE QSMP. THE EGGS ARE AN INTRINSIC PART OF THE SERVER AND TO KILL THEM OFF WOULD BE TO BLOW UP A FUNDAMENTAL PART OF THE WORLDBUILDING OUT OF STUBBORNNESS. AAAAA.
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kafus · 1 year ago
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how to transfer your old pokemon to pokemon home before it's too late!!!
the wi-fi services for the nintendo 3DS and WiiU are shutting down in early april 2024, and while it specifically lists pokemon bank and poke transporter as being available post-shutdown, there is no guarantee of how long that may be for. there will likely come a time when these services shut down, and it could be in the relatively near future.
it is also pretty much impossible now to transfer pokemon to the switch's Home service with alternative methods such as PKHeX (popular pokemon save editor for the uninformed) due to the implementation of server-side Home IDs tracking pokemon at all times - the details of that aren't super important for this post, but point is, whenever bank shuts down, unless nintendo makes an offline way to transfer to home, it will be impossible to move pokemon from the old gens to the new, even with alternative/hack-y methods.
i write this guide with the intention of making this process easier for people since transferring pokemon has changed so much over the past two decades that it's a bit of a mess, and in a timely manner to give people time to finish the process. i'll be organizing by generation so feel free to skip to any part of the guide you need. (keep in mind that transferring is permanent, your pokemon cannot go back afterwards!!)
(by the way it would mean a lot to me if you weren't overwhelmingly negative of pokemon in the tags/reblogs. i get that pokemon transferring being an online service sucks but reading that stuff in my notifications constantly is really tiring </3 make ur own post to talk about that)
to walk you through, i'll be transferring this random shiny spinda i hatched in emerald version all the way up to pokemon home. her name is Moss :]
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below the cut since this is long as fuck sorry LOL
GEN 1/2 -> 3 (aka RBY/GSC -> RSE/FRLG)
this is impossible! as for the Virtual Console releases of the gen 1/2 games on 3DS, more on that later in the gen 5 -> 6/7 section.
GEN 3 -> 4 (aka RSE/FRLG -> DPPT/HGSS)
what you need:
a copy of RSE or FRLG
a copy of DPPT or HGSS in the same language as the RSE/FRLG copy that has beaten the champion and has access to post-game areas, preferably HGSS because it lets you transfer unlimited times as opposed to DPPT's once-per-24-hours limit (unless you happen to have korean DPPT/HGSS, which is not language locked in terms of transferring)
either an original DS or a DS lite, the old ones with the GBA slot at the bottom
the steps:
#1. you can only transfer 6 pokemon at a time, so get whatever 6 pokemon you want to transfer up together in gen 3. if you're intending to transfer less than 6 pokemon, you'll need to catch some extras since you have to transfer the full 6 every time (i usually just catch a bunch of extra mons on the first route, which is what i've done here with the poochyenas/wurmples)
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#2. put the gen 3 game into the GBA slot of the DS, and the gen 4 game into the DS slot. both games should appear on the home menu after turning on the DS.
#3. load the DS game and spam A past the title screen. before loading your save, scroll down. you should see a "MIGRATE FROM (GAME NAME HERE)" option. if you don't, either the GBA game isn't reading properly, or you have not visited Pal Park in your gen 4 game of choice. in HGSS, the Pal Park is located in Fuchsia City, and in DPPT, the Pal Park is located at the end of Route 221 below Sandgem Town.
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#4. select the aforementioned migration option and pick the pokemon you want to transfer.
#5. navigate to the Pal Park and complete the Catching Show, where you re-catch your transferred pokemon in the wild. this does not overwrite what pokeballs they were originally caught in! you will need to bring a pokemon with Surf if you have any Pokemon that spawn in the water areas. you can check what location the pokemon you transferred will be in on bulbapedia.
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#6. say yes to storing the caught pokemon in your PC boxes and they'll be there!
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important things to note:
pokemon with HM moves will be blocked from transfer, so make sure to use the Move Deleter to remove HM moves from any pokemon you're transferring in gen 3 before trying to transfer. in RSE, the Move Deleter is in Lilycove City, and in FRLG they are in Fuchsia City.
gen 3 -> 4 is the only step in the transfer process where held items transfer up as well, meaning that if you attach a valuable item such as a rare candy, master ball, or TM to a transferred pokemon, you can take it off that pokemon and put it in your bag in the gen 4 game.
an aside about colosseum/XD gale of darkness on gamecube:
you can transfer pokemon from colo/XD as well! unfortunately you'll need to have beaten colo/XD, and then you will also need to beat the gen 3 game... in FRLG, you even have to complete the postgame ruby/sapphire quest on the sevii islands to unlock trading with the gamecube games. once you do all that though, you can navigate to the pokemon center basement in Phenac City to trade with your gen 3 GBA title. to do this, you'll need a gamecube or wii with gamecube compatibility, a GBA (or GBA SP), and a GCN -> GBA link cable to connect the two consoles.
GEN 4 -> 5 (aka DPPT/HGSS -> BW/BW2)
what you need:
a copy of DPPT/HGSS
a copy of BW or BW2 in the same language as DPPT/HGSS copy that has beaten the champion (or N in the original BW) and has access to post-game areas.
two DS consoles of any kind (3DS is also fine!)
the steps:
#1. get the pokemon you want to transfer together in your gen 4 game's PC boxes. you can only transfer 6 pokemon at a time. if you have less than 6, catch some extra pokemon, since you need to transfer the full 6 every time. save it and turn off the DS with the gen 4 game.
#2. turn on your gen 5 game and navigate to the Poke Transfer Lab. personally i just fly to Black City/White Forest and head west.
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#3. talk to the NPC in the lab to start the transfer process. you will be prompted to turn on your other DS again and open DS Download Play with your gen 4 game inserted. do that and download the Poke Transfer app that comes up.
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#4. select the 6 Pokemon you want to transfer when prompted.
#5. play the transfer minigame! just drag the... bow? (lol) on the bottom screen to aim your pokeballs. there's technically a time limit, but it's very generous, and your final score doesn't matter.
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#6. say yes to transferring the pokemon once you're done and they'll be placed in your PC boxes!
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important things to note:
pokemon with HM moves will be blocked from transfer, so make sure to use the Move Deleter to remove HM moves from any pokemon you're transferring in gen 4 before trying to transfer. in DPPT they're in Canalave City, and in HGSS they're in Blackthorn City.
the level the pokemon was obtained at and the date it was obtained is changed upon transfer to gen 5 - it will have the met date of your DS clock and the met level of the level it was at the time of transfer. if you'd like to preserve a pokemon's met date, make sure to change the DS clock to the proper date.
GEN 5 -> 6/7 (aka BW/BW2 -> 3DS TITLES/BANK)
what you need:
a copy of BW/BW2
a copy of any 3DS pokemon game (XY/ORAS/SUMO/USUM)
a 3DS (or 2DS, i'll just be referring to them all as 3DSes here) with the poke transporter and pokemon bank apps installed. these were free apps that were once downloadable from the 3DS eShop, but the 3DS eShop is no longer available, so if you don't already have them installed you will need to explore alternate methods, AKA hacking your 3DS and injecting them in. that's outside the scope of this guide but you can find more information here on 3ds.hacks.guide. (do not attempt to follow any 3DS hacking guide not on this website, they could be outdated and harm your 3DS!)
a nintendo network ID that your 3DS is logged into (also outside the scope of this guide but if you don't already have one, it will prompt you during the process to make one)
internet connection
the steps:
#1. poke transporter defaults to trying to transfer every pokemon located in Box 1 of your PC, so go into your gen 5 game and put every pokemon you want to transfer into Box 1, and take anything you don't want to transfer out. if you want to transfer more pokemon than you can fit in one box, you'll have to transfer multiple times.
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#2. open poke transporter with your gen 5 game inserted into the 3DS' cartridge slot. after pressing A through some menus and selecting the gen 5 game when prompted, it should ask if you want to transfer the pokemon in Box 1, with a preview of the pokemon inside. confirm and let it do its thing. after poke transporter is finished, the pokemon you transferred will be in the special Transport Box in bank.
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#3. make sure you either have a 3DS pokemon title downloaded onto your 3DS, or swap out your gen 5 cart for one, it doesn't matter which.
#4. close out of poke transporter and navigate to pokemon bank. at the time of writing this guide, bank is still online and is free for everyone without a subscription - the main menu has an infinite "free trial" period number.
#5. select "use pokemon bank" and pick a 3DS game to connect with when prompted. it doesn't matter which one, but if you're looking to see your pokemon in a gen 6/7 game right now, pick the one you want to move it into. viewing a pokemon in a gen 6/7 game isn't required to move to home later, though!
#6. the Transport Box is located one box to the left of Box 1 - navigate to it and drag your pokemon out into a normal bank box. now you can move them to any gen 6/7 pokemon game you want, or home later!
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important things to note:
even though bank connects with both gen 6 and gen 7 games, once you place a pokemon into a gen 7 game (SUMO/USUM), you cannot transfer that pokemon back to a gen 6 game (XY/ORAS), so be careful!
an aside about the VC releases of RBY/GSC:
poke transporter can also be used to transfer pokemon out of the VC releases of RBY/GSC. these pokemon are changed pretty heavily, converting all their old gen data into pokemon's modern data structure. you can find more information about all the changes/conversions made on bulbapedia. these pokemon are considered gen 7 pokemon afterwards, and cannot be moved into XY/ORAS. pokemon with held items also cannot be transferred from VC titles and will fail to transfer.
if you want to transfer pokemon from cartridge RBY/GSC and have a save dumping device, it is possible to inject the cartridge's save file into the VC versions with Checkpoint on a hacked 3DS and then transfer that way. for GSC specifically, you'll need to edit your save slightly to make it compatible with VC GSC's save format. i personally made a converter for that here that you're free to use in-browser.
GEN 6/7 -> GEN 8+ (aka BANK -> HOME)
what you need:
a 3DS (or 2DS, i'll just be referring to them all as 3DSes here) with the pokemon bank app installed. this was a free app that was once downloadable from the 3DS eShop, but the 3DS eShop is no longer available, so if you don't already have it installed you will need to explore alternate methods, AKA hacking your 3DS and injecting it in. that's outside the scope of this guide but you can find more information here on 3ds.hacks.guide. (do not attempt to follow any 3DS hacking guide not on this website, they could be outdated and harm your 3DS!)
a nintendo network ID that your 3DS is logged into (also outside the scope of this guide but if you don't already have one, it will prompt you during the process to make one)
a switch with Pokemon Home installed, which can be downloaded for free from the switch's eShop. a nintendo switch online subscription is not required.
unfortunately, you WILL need a subscription to home's premium plan to do bank -> home transfers.
internet connection
the steps:
#1. open pokemon bank and make sure all the pokemon you want to transfer are in their own boxes, and any you don't want to transfer are not in the same boxes as the to-be-transferred pokemon.
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#2. go back to the bank home menu and select the "move pokemon to pokemon home" option. when you get the notice about the transfer being one-way, you'll need to scroll down to hit "Begin".
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#3. you will be prompted to select what boxes of pokemon you'd like to transfer, so pick all the applicable ones.
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#4. you will then be prompted to put in the moving key from home, so turn on your switch, open pokemon home, and select the icon that looks like a 3DS on the main menu. when prompted, choose "Ready!" to get the moving key.
#5. input the moving key on the 3DS, submit it, and wait for both apps to do their thing. once bank goes back to its title screen, you can turn off the 3DS.
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#6. home will go back to its title screen as well, and depending on how many pokemon you moved, you may have to wait a few minutes to get back into the app. once it's done, the next time you open home, it'll prompt you to choose how to organize your transferred pokemon into home. pick whatever you see fit.
#7. congratulations, your pokemon are safe in home!!
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important things to note:
unlike all pokemon games before the switch, pokemon can actually go backwards in generation on switch, so don't worry about transferring a pokemon into scarlet/violet locking you out of moving it to sword/shield, for example. (the exception to this is LGPE - nothing can be moved into LGPE and once a pokemon is moved out of LGPE, it can't go back.)
pokemon home actually has decent hack checks, so be careful when transferring hacked/glitched/otherwise illegitimate pokemon around.
pokemon from a gen 3/4 game will have their met location set to "Poke Shifter" - this is an alternative translation of the japanese name for the Poke Transporter.
pokemon on switch can only transfer into games that contain that pokemon in its dex, so not everything transferred can go into scarlet/violet, for example.
and that's it!!
there's a lot of other quirks to the pokemon transferring process at pretty much all steps, so if you run into an unusual issue or have specific questions about how pokemon data is changed in minute ways across the franchise, i would encourage you to do your own research, all of this stuff is pretty heavily documented by the fanbase. this is just meant to be a guide for casual users, and a quick reference.
this guide of course does not cover options for transferring in alternative ways, but it's worth mentioning that if you have a hacked 3DS and the ability to back up save files at any point from gens 3 -> 5, you can use PKHeX to transfer pokemon into the 3DS titles, then move them to bank and transfer to home normally from there. that's outside the scope of this guide and i'd also encourage you to do your own research for that.
happy transferring!
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sparklecarehospital · 4 months ago
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Hoping I can do some more site stuff soon. The last feature I implemented a few weeks ago was just a cosmetic loading icon in the page search bar in-comic. It's a small detail and probably not necessary but I felt like it was a cute thing to add.
I took a bit of a break from site development to work on other stuff. I hope I can keep working on the site some more soon.
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lady-hibiscus · 28 days ago
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seaster doodles because i said so
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enemies with benefits you get it
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lilacthebooklover · 10 months ago
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mmhmm. yes. i'm absolutely in love with shadow milk's design, but can we please take a moment to just,,
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just look at her hdhkjf
the harp? the tiny lil devil tail?? the halo and wings??? the lil headress?? the cute front parting and pink aesthetic and hair twirlies and sparkles and sbhgbhgfj why is she so pretty
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wayrok · 28 days ago
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headcanon for EPICs Odysseus
ok so imagine like
he has like an owl symbol on his forehead because of Athena, after Polites dies, he puts his headband over the owl symbol thus symbolising rejecting Athena and trying to be better and more like Polites
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fauvester · 2 years ago
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welcoming cardassia’s newest alien doctor at the docking port!
au where they kept in contact via subspace letters and struck up an epistolary long distance relationship until julian took a position on cardassia prime to be with his bf..
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sadquickchristmassnowman · 1 year ago
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had to say this to a community blog, but abed is literally me, i watched that episode where a gay guy hits on him in a bar while he info dumps to him about his own special interest and i am just here like the soyjack pointing guy at this man like he is literally me (accurate recreation of what is going on in my brain rn below)
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first off, great image & the sentiment is shared by many of us on community tumblr I’m sure. ALSO that’s so awesome, something that continues to blow my mind is how accurate some of abed’s little quirks and behaviors are??? they’re so incredibly niche and seemingly random yet somehow hit the nail right on the head???
like in pillows and blankets when they say that bit about “he’s a mastermind capable of incredible manipulation, but also can’t tell his left from his right without singing the star-spangled banner” (that’s not the exact quote verbatim but you get it) I was like ???;?;?$;$;$;$;(! BECAUSE I DID THAT EXACT THING FOR THE LONGEST TIME? (you put your right hand over your heart when doing the pledge.) how did they peg that specific behavior so accurately??? so casually??? futhers my hypothesis that autism representation is almost never accurate unless accidental. but GOLLY gee was it accurate!!! holy shit dude.
anyway I’m assuming you’re on the spectrum too from this ask and thanks for giving me an excuse to rant about these because What The Fuck. glad we’ve all been able to see at least some of ourselves in abed he’s so special to me
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slytherwrites · 1 year ago
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Hello, I hope I am not disturbing you. Your writings are great. If you are getting requests, can you write for yandere husband Pollux Black, Crygnus Black, Orion Black, Alphard Black, Severus Snape, Gellert Grindelwald, Aberfort Dumbledore, Albus Dumbledore? Please
You're not bothering me at all! I love requests! Here are your husbands lol
Characters: Pollux Black, Cygnus Black, Orion Black, Alphard Black, Severus Snape, Gellert Grindelwald, Aberforth Dumbledore, and Albus Dumbledore
TWs: Yandere Content, implications of forced sex, implications of forced pregnancy
Pollux Black
There was no denying it. Pollux was drunk out of his mind.
He'd always carried himself with guilt. A twin who's brother died in the womb. The firstborn son of his father, thus complicit in whatever he wanted, in order to keep his place in the family. He was man who's back was so spineless that it should've curled in on himself already. A disappointment, not proving himself better than Arcturus and not securing the switch in power between his branch of the family and Arcturus'.
But he was you husband, and you had to stick by his side.
"Baby," He crooned in you ear, "You know I love you. You know your the only one for me."
"I am aware."
"Oh, darling I need you, there's no one else for me." He continues, "Love is just what keeps me going. And love is just you in that dress."
"Is that some song?"
"Loving you is just what I do best..."
You take the cup from his hand and slip him out of his formal robes. The reception is over. Cassiopeia got out of this family and is married to someone who loves her. You wish you could say the same.
"It's how I feel, darling." Pollux continues, "I can't stand to see people around you."
"I'm all yours, Pollux." You tell him, "I'm all yours."
"When are you going to act like it then." He whines as more layers get removed between the two of you. You've holed up in the main manor, in one of the side rooms. Pollux is too drunk to apparate or use the floo network. And nobody in the Black Family would dare be seen riding the Knight Bus.
"I do act like it." You tell yourself, "I'm yours, Pollux."
"You don't say I love you. You recoil from my touch. You refuse to call me anything other than my first name." Pollux's tone gets serious, "You don't act like you love me."
"I love you." You tell him.
He grabs your shoulders and throws you onto the bed with him, "Then start acting like it."
"Pollux—" You tried to put some distance between the two of you, "Pollux, wait."
"No." His tone was much more sober, even if he was still slurring his words, "No. You are mine. Quit acting like you're not."
"Please—" You start but he interrupts you, "No! No. You are my wife. You shall act like it."
"I do!" You try to get back onto your feet, "I do!"
"I am your husband and you are my wife." He says, "We shall be one. We shall grow ourselves—our family."
What he means dawns on you and you know that this was always a part of your marriage contract, but you believed that by the time it happened, you'd be in love with him.
You tried and your tried but the light are off and the curtain is closing. This performance is over and act two's about to begin. This time, with a proper pureblood family from the two of you.
Cygnus Black
Cygnus was raised as a righteous man. He has a duty to the family—to live long and prosper. And he wanted to do that with you. Second-born son of the second-born line, he wasn't close to leading the family, even in his wildest dreams.
But he could lead his own family. And he wanted to create that family and that legacy with you and you alone.
"Spin." Your dress robes shimmered with the brightness of the stars themselves, the glimmer bouncing off of them in the waves of your turns, shining as bright as you do.
You don't say anything to him as he takes in your figure. You need to be perfect for him. It is your wedding day, after all.
"Muggles wait to see what they're partner is wearing until they are right in front of them." Cygnus notes, "What fools they are."
"How do you know what muggles do at weddings?" You try to laugh, tease him so that this moment isn't as daunting for you.
"Because I do." Cygnus growls, "Don't question your husband."
"You're not my husband yet." You laugh weakly for your own sake. Cygnus has always been quick to anger, quick to contempt. Hopefully you're quicker—especially than he is at action.
"Look at me." He grabs your arm and squeezes until all of the blood rushes from the hold, "You do not question me. I am your husband. It would behoove you to learn that quickly."
"Alright." You rub your wrist, comforting yourself, "I understand."
"I'll train you up. Don't worry." He says, "You'll learn before our children are born. You'll be an optimal parent. You'll be the perfect spouse. I'll make sure of it."
Somehow, you silently note, that you know that you'll never be as perfect as he needs, no matter how much he teaches and you endure.
Orion Black
Orion Black looked at you with a gaze so sharp it could pierce your body and soul. His straight black hair was combed neatly. His eyes were concrete grey and he kept his face just with the hints of what his beard could be if he didn't shave it regularly. His suit was crisp and clean and his shoes shined like motor oil.
He was well dressed and angry at something. And he was looking at you to fix it.
You took the initiative, silently accio-ing a bottle and a glass, pouring him a drink and then handing it to him. "Rough day?"
He takes the glass you offer, "News you won't like."
"What is it?" You ask, "I can handle it."
"I know, darling. You're so strong for me." Orion takes a sip of the drink and bridges the gap between the two of you, taking your hands into his, "They know the gender of Druella's baby."
The realization dawns on you, "Another girl."
"Yes," He offers you a sympathetic smile, "You've always been bright."
"I don't think coming to that conclusion took much brain power."
"I talked with my grandfather. He's expecting us to pick up the slack."
"Have the heir." You fill in.
Orion nods.
"No." You put your foot down, "That was the deal. I was to stay with you, play the perfect Black Family Wife and I would remain financed, protected, and untouched."
"That was if Cygnus was able to have a male heir." Orion says, "Do you think that I want to go back on that arrangement?"
"Then don't!"
"And have Bellatrix be the next Head of the Black Family?" Orion asks, "I'm already set up to be heir. It was always expected of me."
"It's not going to be expected of me."
"Yes it was." Orion's grip tightens, "We are already wed. You are mine. You cannot leave. Now you can do this the easy way, or I'll imperio you."
"You wouldn't."
He looks you in the eye and reaches for his wand. He doesn't say the words outright, but you made a deal with the devil so he wouldn't hurt you further. And maybe you will have to slide back on that deal a bit. But if you didn't, he'd take it painfully. And he would feel as if he could take more and more out of you.
You can keep some semblance of control this way. And what's one kid in the grand scheme of things?
Alphard Black
Alphard Black loved you to the moon and back. He was Hephaestus and you were Aphrodite, but like the mythical husband and wife, you were not loyal.
No, you'd found your Ares.
A muggleborn, in fact. Some man in the French Ministry of Magic who's been in Britain working on a project. Alphard didn't care who he was or what he done, except for when it was with you.
He used muggle means of subduing him. He's always been fascinated in the magicless. After all, he took you as his wife, even after his family threatened him.
It took all of his convincing to prove that you'd be a good partner, despite being a squib. You can still produce magical children after all. And he's not of the main line anyways.
But you had to go and fuck it up, didn't you?
He has your man tied up in a chair in the parlor, stripped of his wand and his clothing. He was still out cold and you came running when your darling husband told you oh, so sweetly that he had a surprise for you.
He stands over and behind your passed out lover. He's able to see your face when you notice what's gone on. And he can see the horror on your face as you see his manic smile.
"Alphie... what did you do?" You take a step closer, kneeling in front of your lover, "Alphie! What are you doing!"
"Don't Alphie me, sweetheart." He replies, "I saved you from a horrid life in the muggle world and this is how you repay me? By fucking some muggleborn swine!"
"Alphie, it's not what you think..."
"No, baby, it is what I think." He says, "I've been working and you've had a bit too much free time. So you took a man who would give you that attention. I'm sorry, darling. But I'll give you the attention you deserve."
"Alphie, please!" You try to reason with him, but he grabs a knife, "You can't do this!"
"Oh but I can. Knife to the head, incendio for the corpse, and aguamenti to put out the flames. It's simple, really."
You try to run to your lover, standing with him so that if Alphard was to light him ablaze, he'd have to do so to you as well. But Alphard casts a spell you don't recognize and you fall to the floor as you loose consiousness.
You come too as the fire dies down. Your lover no more than ashes. Alphard has himself pressed against your back, arms around your waist. He's singing the song at your wedding and it dawns on you:
You can never escape. You will never escape. The world that you admired so much and was desperate to be a part of you had a chokehold on you so strong that you were unable to leave it, even if you wanted to.
Severus Snape
You were in this marriage for your own personal protection.
The Snape name wasn't known as a Wizarding name just yet, but Severus was a halfblood. He could trace his lineage.
You could not, on account of being a muggleborn.
Honestly, with how Severus acted, you'd wished a death eater would take you out already. It wasn't nearly as torturous as being the wife to such an insufferable man.
"Darling," His slow manner of speaking irritated you, as if you couldn't handle him speaking any faster than this, "You mustn't linger about like that. You seem unhappy."
"And what if I am unhappy?"
"With the favor I have provided you?" He asks, "It would be foolish of you."
"Then call me a fool."
In all honesty, he was right. Staring out the window in the muggle home the two of you shared wasn't healthy for you. It only served to remind you of the home and happiness that you have since lost.
You change the subject, "How is your lord faring?"
"Better, now that he's decided on whomst his biggest threat is."
"Not Albus Dumbledore?"
"No, not Albus Dumbledore." Severus won't tell you more than that and you do not push the matter.
"Anything interesting in the potions you've been making?"
"No." He replies, "It is all the basics for getting a potions mastery. I will have to show it to the Potions Mastery Committee, down at the Ministry."
"You're heading into London?"
"I was planning on flooing, actually."
"Pick me up a new book." You turn to look at him, seeing him flip through the pages of his own book, "I've finished the last in that series and I want something of a similar author."
"Alright." He replies, not looking up at you. You look at his face, still ever-present in his book.
You suppose that he could be worse. He could be active in this situation, not just complacent in your slow torment under this roof. He could lay an unjust hand on you. He could treat you like the other wives of Death Eaters.
There is a mercy in how he acts. There is love in his distance.
You could reciprocate it, you could let it grow and blossom. But for now, you let the waves splash softly against the sand that is the foundation of your relationship with the man.
Gellert Grindelwald
Gellert Grindelwald doesn't love you.
The truth of the matter is that he's never loved anyone, only having obsessions. And, for all of his life, he's only been obsessed with two individuals: Albus Dumbledore—and you.
The fact that you have something in common with Albus Dumbledore makes you laugh. Him, one of the greatest wizards of all time, and you, a witch with so much self-loathing you almost formed an obscurus.
Almost, being the key word. For Gellert Grindelwald made it certain that you would not succumb to this deadly affliction, that you would find love within yourself and the world and its magic, so that you would keep on living.
And, it was all so he can keep you funneled away, hidden from the rest of the world in a small flat near Godric's Hollow.
It's embarrassing really, how quickly you fell for him. And yet, he does not love you, even after all that he did to make you love him.
You just stare off into the fireplace, awaiting his arrival. Because he's the only thing that keeps you from slipping into that state again. He's the only thing that brings you joy.
Aberforth Dumbledore
Aberforth wasn't the gloriest of husbands you could of had.
In all honesty, you befriended him to get closer to Albus. That was the real catch, your mother told you. Handsome, intelligent, hardworking—the world was falling at his feet and you could've been the woman smiling by his side, perfectly cared for and content while he tool the Wizarding World by storm.
But Aberforth had to actually take a liking to you, one he took violently, one that tarnished your reputation afterwards.
One thing lead to another and there was a child between the two of you. Aberforth made you an honest woman and you got yourself stuck with a child you didn't want, a job you hated, and a husband you hated even more.
At least nobody cares about what you did, out of wedlock. It's been decades now. You and Aberforth are over a century old. So is Albus.
And even if you can't call Albus Dumbledore yours, you still get to be near him and bask in his intellect. You two are friends, even if you always wanted to be something more.
Albus Dumbledore
He was an odd man. Never violent, even if you wished he would be.
He was kind, wise, put love as the forefront of everything, even though you didn't love him.
You didn't even like him. No, you were filled with pure, unadulterated hatred for your husband.
He's a gentle man. Smart, intelligent, caring. He keeps to himself on most occasions and lets you roam the walls of Hogwarts freely, just like you did, when the two of you were students.
You remember him well, you suppose. Back then, he wasn't like this. Back then, he was easier to endure. Back then, your dislike of him was validated.
Now, he's the war hero and headmaster of the greatest wizarding school in the world. He's saved countless of lives and mentored everyone who's walked through the walls of Hogwarts for the past century or so.
And it's exhausting, staying by his side. You're expected to be a proud person, prideful in your husband's work and all he has done, joyful in how the Dumbledore name has flourished and grateful for the man you've married.
But you are not here willingly. You would not have joined his side by choice.
You honestly hope Minister Fudge finds a way to oust him. Maybe his crimes in the wars will be released. Maybe he'll keel over and die already.
Because being the partner to such a perfect man is exhausting. Especially when you're the only one who sees all of his flaws.
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time8582 · 5 months ago
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@saline-coelacanth It’s only right I post this on Father’s Day
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