So one thing I’ve noticed is that people’s DnD characters may vary but there is usually an underlying thread that they all have in common. This thread is typically related to what that person struggles with the most.
For instance, my betrotheds DnD characters: a bitchy warlock we had to bust out of two different pacts, a sassy barbarian, a reformed drow cultist, and a sunshine fighter cleric.
All these characters were wildly different but at their very core struggle was them grappling with their self worth. My betrothed struggles with their worth a great deal and even with different facets showing their characters all have that too.
Mine all tend to contend with different themes of loneliness and acceptance. Surprise, surprise, the little autistic gremlin yearns to have been met with more love and lasting friendships.
So we’re at breakfast. I am meeting a new friend of my betrotheds for the first time. It’s been twenty minutes since I’ve met this man. I say my theory. He laughs. He starts to describe a few of his characters but specifies that he often has healing aspects. He gives a very broad overview of their character arcs.
I ponder for a moment then said, “Would you like to have my assessment?”
He laughed, “Sure!”
“We’ve just met. It’s gonna get real.”
“Bring it on.”
“I think your struggle is that you feel you must offer something of value or service to people to be worthy of their love.”
His jaw dropped. His fork froze midway to his mouth. A potato fell. He stared into space as this sank in. Quietly he said, “Oh.”
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parents of disabled kids will be like “we know our kid is disabled but we just won’t tell them about it. we don’t want them to think they’re less valuable than other kids. we don’t want them to feel limited by their disability, we want them to know they’re capable of anything.”
meanwhile those kids are growing up thinking “why is everything so much harder for me than it is for everyone else? there’s no reason i shouldn’t be able to just do this. i guess i’m just a failed, broken person.”
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Me in pain and exhausted and only thinking of characters being in the same situation
Rolan with joint issues because of bug joints and bones so his body just hurts and things easily dislocate where he’ll have to pop them back in place and try to continue on and deal with the dull aches everywhere
Rand with migraines, always wearing his sunglasses to try and block any of the light coming in, struggling to write dnd notes because while his head may be slowly trying to kill him he finally figured out where to go in the story and he’ll be damned if he forgets it
Kian just exhausted all the time even if he hasn’t done anything but is just tired down to his bones and struggles to get out of bed, lays awake wishing he could just sleep but racing thoughts fill his mind instead and he just stares at the ceiling as the sun slowly starts to rise
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AGENTS BLAST!!!! this is the closest thing to a group photo for now, the whole gang and their updated hairstyles!
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how much self-loathing and self-reproach does Joel really grapple with. we already know that he’s vividly relived the fulcrum point of his daughter dying within his arms for the past 20 years on rerun, but given the new context of the series… how much regret does he truly possess in bulk. beyond the deeply imbedded covet of saving Sarah, does he still wish he remembered to pick up that pancake mix. does he still wish he brought back that birthday cake for the two of them to enjoy. does he still wish he arrived home from work at the intended time he promised just to have one more normal hour to spend time with her. superficially, at least from the game’s standpoint, the grief and dejection primarily stemmed from failing as a guardian… but what if that was exacerbated by Joel thinking he also fundamentally failed as a father. and he never got the chance to rectify that. and he never will
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Btw the boys is a great example of the state of sensuality in USAmerican culture. There is a very fine line of what kind of pleasure is acceptable to enjoy/crave/need, and it depends on who you are whether you’re crossing the line or not. Firstly, “deviant” sexual interests (kinks, fetishes, etc) are treated as both a freak show and something to be made fun of. Creepy, funny, weird, disgusting. But more importantly, sexual violence against men is treated as a joke, while male submission (or NEED in any way, sexual or not) is a sign of weakness and leads to ridicule. It’s so telling and so bleak. Sexual assault of course is one thing, but also just the fact that men are only allowed to express sensuality in very limited terms (passionate/rough sex where they play the dominant/active role) and that the very human need for affection is reduced to sexual need and/or ridiculed — it’s so narrow and tight a box and everything else is mocked. Not that I expect that much from that show but it’s REALLY interesting to see. They really live like this.
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