#that was all i remember before i woke up

[baphofemme]

ok my dreams are starting to get ridiculous now (ToT)

[doux-amer]

[cent-scratchnsniff]

tie tying doodles w ramblings on it in tags

[liebelesbe]

I feel like I've seen multiple posts about tomboy, slightly masculine or even just strong women characters where the OP was soo glad she's also allowed to be feminine!! And I'm always like. As opposed to what? Being completely and totally masc? Please, show me the forbidden totally 100% no femininity to be found girl characters that there seem to be so many of that you're glad this character isn't one of them. I would like to see them.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Late Night Talking

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[pthalomars]

hhhhhghgg... jason grace thoughts... [my telekinetic powers make every wall in my house explode]

[tamymew]

character that unironically came to me in a dream??

[trashcreatyre]

I think the main thing that pisses me off about like 90% of mephiles ships is that people will be like "how old is he??" Look that fanwiki says that he's ten and they RUN with it. Like they don't read further. I'm so convinced that most people don't even know the plot of 06 bc the shit I've seen people draw and write with the characters is just mind boggling.

[hell0mega]

guy wakes up in a place he recognizes but doesn't know why or how he got there. he's a bit confused but he lives out the next few hours just like he normally would, just a bit dazed. but once he goes to sleep, it immediately restarts back to where he woke up.

he realizes this is a time loop... but something is different about it.

he realizes pretty quickly that this is some sort of dreamscape. it's a time loop, but for some reason, things around him do change, and he can pretty easily change things too just by thinking of them, like a lucid dream. but he always wakes up in media res once it gets to some sort of end point, and no one else around him remembers previous loops.

as he's trying to figure out what the goal is to end the loop, he's suddenly thrown for a loop when he's attacked and killed by someone he's never seen before. he wakes back up, shaken, but at least it was something new and out of his control.

he starts to go about as he had been but is killed again. faster and faster, sooner and sooner after he wakes up, he's killed by increasingly horrifying ways, all because of this other dude. finally, it stops when he manages to get a word in to the other guy before he's killed. turns out this guy is also in the time loop, and our guy was the first thing he saw that was different. thinking he was the test, or had something to do with it, he attacked him. his time was reset, so he knew he was onto something, hence the repeat killings. he was obviously taking this a lot harder than the first guy.

they decided to work together and figure out a way to stop the loop. they could both affect things with their lucidity and they tested what they could do. they could do a lot, though none of it seemed to matter. if one of them died, or got to some sort of "end point," they'd both reset. they slowly stopped really trying to get out and started just enjoying their time. they imagined things they'd always wanted to experience or see, and it would happen. it was fun.

eventually, they started noticing a certain girl was around more than any other person. she didn't seem to also be in a time loop, but she wouldnt completely forget who they were with each reset, either. they decided to befriend her and bring her along because it was nice to have company after all this time. she enjoyed the experiences they were conjuring but didn't find it incredibly impossible like a real life person would at seeing what was essentially magic. typical dream-based character acceptance behavior.

at one point, they're sitting on the pavement of a parking lot watching the sunset they thought up of, just talking casually. guy one notices that the sunset starts moving backward and forward in time, rhythmically, preventing the sun from setting. things would "escape" their control sometimes, but he realized the sun was going up and down at the same rhythm that the girl was rocking back and forth. she simply looked upon it in calm awe, not acknowledging that she may be influencing it. before guy one could say anything, guy two reached past him and shot her in the head.

time did not reset.

things went on, as much as it does in a dreamscape time loop, and they had settled into some kind of pattern of normalcy. most days they didn't even talk about trying to get out of there. they were able to carve some comfort out of their situation.

eventually, guy two runs up to guy one with the girl. he's excited and says he's thought of another thing to try to get them out. he says they just need to get into a truck and drive backwards really fast. confused, guy one asks why he thinks this would work at all. guy two says he has no idea. he just knows it'll work. he has a feeling.

so they go to an open nature area with a long road and conjure up a pickup truck. guy two is driving, with guy one in the passenger seat and the girl in the small backseat. guy two revs up and barrels backwards, whooping and celebrating the stunt, saying they're getting out of here.

guy one sees the trees whip by. they go over a bridge crossing a lake. the sky is bright with sun. he looks at guy two. his eyes are wild, his mouth in a gruesome open smile as he hollers. the girl in the backseat simply looked on in ignorant bliss.

guy one knew then.

he opened his door and jumped out, tucking and rolling. as he did, he thought about the truck barreling backwards off a cliff. when he stopped and got up, he saw just that. time slowed as the truck lost traction with the road and started to soar. guy two's face fell as he saw guy one standing there, looking down at them from the edge, face solemn. a look of shocked realization spread across his face as he descended towards the ground below.

then i woke up with a splitting headache. so. i guess i escaped the time loop???

[dykedvonte]

Danse has to get homesick In Sanctuary. Like despite being uncertain of how much his past is real including times with the Brotherhood, those memories were home. The Brotherhood was home especially the Prydwen.

No matter all the comfort and the luxuries SoSu could put to make him feel more relaxed or like it’s his space it’s still not home. It’s so unique to him cause everyone else has a home in a sense. A thing or place they can come and go to as they please while Danse doesn’t. He can never go back to the people he considered family and they can never go to him without serious consequences. It doesn’t help that (due to his own faults and beliefs) a good majority of the new people in his life do not exactly like him.

It’s so isolating for him as the wasteland is also a different culture in general. Theres so much he’s not used to vs what he is. But all in all I think that’s a good thing. I feel as if Danse had a better arc in game it would 100% have him learning or developing a sense of home before a sense of self. I think it gets overlooked that Danse is a person that likes or feels like he needs to belong to something. A cause, a philosophy, a mission. He needs a goal. He must learn to live for himself and his purpose but it’s clear he wants to find that through something which is why he latches onto the Sole Survivor after rather than just wander the wastes. He needs something, anything to base a sense of self on at this point in time and who better than the person that opened their home to him in the first place.

He’s a dude that needs a foundation or home to ground himself on or else he doesn’t know what to do with himself or even start.

[hercarisntyours]

I MISS INSIDE JOBBBBBBB

[chiimeramanticore]

waow

[shatterthefragments]

And she fucking needs to reschedule her appt. She always wants to do it together with someone. But no. Of course you wouldn’t be able to sleep if you never sleep at those hours anyway. Of course not.

And fine. We’ll reschedule bc what other choice is there. But. Yeah. “I’m sorry”

I gave up my weekend to cater to this bc otherwise I could’ve gone another day to get my new Covid vaccine. I could’ve booked for another time. I could’ve used this day to go in and borrow dad’s car so I could’ve gone to a waterfall or beach even though it’s freezing.

And now I’m probably going to have to give up next weekend - ASSUMING there’s appointments left for then. My last two day weekend before my semester starts and I split my days off. Which is fine. It’s my choice. But I was hoping to do some stuff on my own :(.

And she probably doesn’t. Fuck. I still need to take her for bloodwork (overdue) and picking up an updated will since the sis and I are adults now and it might be A Thing that it needed to be updated. And not to be like especially given their health and that they’ve both had Covid now. But. I worry. I’m not really in a position to be able to support the household even if we inherited and there aren’t taxes. But I’d have to hold it together. I’m older.

She won’t drive herself to go do these things.

(But I have to drive myself now if I can’t bus there).

And I get having anxiety. I am anxious too.

But for it to get so bad years and years ago that it severely affects your family AND your family has asked you to get help several times (on a regular basis too. Bc we’re not professionals and can’t really help you. Especially when you don’t even agree to come along and just sit in the car as I drive around) it’s frustrating. (How would we have turned out if you had actually sought help for your mental illness? And why do I just KNOW that you’ll blame yourself for our mental illness. That we have to hide any attempts to better our own so that you don’t blame yourself?)

Who could we have been if any of us had been diagnosed?

I shouldn’t have had to deal with that as a child. In elementary school. Especially when I was already suicidal on my own anyway.

And yes. I resent you.

“I bet you wish for a different mother”

Yeah. One that fucking tried a little bit harder to get help before it got this bad. Before having us preferably. One that when asked to get help - agrees. Even if we’d have to arrange and just get you in the car and escort you there.

One that even occasionally stuck to anything you say you’ll do.

When I couldn’t even rely on you as a child. An older child.

“At least I raised you to not do drugs or lie. Or drink soda.”

I never felt safe to tell the truth of course I lie to you sometimes. I’ve craved nothing more than the sweet release of oblivion sometimes. Painful violence with flavour isn’t fun.

And then now. You’re. Even now. You’re so judgemental. “You’re such a rebel now”

For what?! Getting tattoos?! That I’ve always wanted!!

I am frustrated.

You wonder why I try to go out of the house and do things?

I hate staying here. But where else am I going to have so much space? And not have to pay a formal rent?

Urges are there. But. Can’t. It never helped to hurt myself anywhere near as much I needed. And I have healing tattoo and touch up’s right now. Im ok though. I don’t. I don’t do it like that.

I need food is what I need but fuck I’m annoyed.

[highlifeboat]

Aboslutely wild dream about Resident Evil Ethan and Mia where they were in a huge mall and all the zombies were underneath it in all these abandonded lower levels and Ethan and Mi were shapparoning a school feild trip and they ended up in the abandoded underground following/looking for Garrette from the FNAF movie cause he was separated from the group that had gone to explore the upper level of the abandoded area that they were allowed to see, and for some resson Ethan fucking snapped and it hard cut to Mia running deeper into the underground, screaming about how Ethan was "painting himself"(?? With the kids' blood I guess idk) where all the zombies were but they didnt really pay attention to her and she didnt seem to norice them until one hooked her shirt by accent and then she suddenly had a gun and was really chill and just no look shot it in the fucking head while looking straight into the camera and then I woke up and I cannot comprehend what the fuck that was.

[chaosinstigator]

I’m on my knees begging now, please stop

[chaotic-average-child]

getting back on my drawing slowly but surely ^^ here's an aleena