#that they had no intention of joining
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cookinguptales Ā· 3 months ago
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every time I remember that the most popular version of the haunting of hill house is the version that makes theo and eleanor sisters I'm just like
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bajaja-blast Ā· 5 months ago
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you dislike Luke Castellan because he disagreed with an oppressive government system and actually took action to change the abusive ways him and his peers have been forced to follow for millennia.
I dislike Luke Castellan because in the Titans Curse he manipulated Annabeth, who he raised as his little sister, into holding up the sky, the FUCKING sky, for over 20 hours and had the audacity to walk away as though he was completely apathetic towards it while she begged and pleaded with him to help her.
we are not the same.
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cent-scratchnsniff Ā· 11 days ago
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something bad did indeed happen to that man. spent abt 25 minutes trying to find a better picture of that one (1) offical piece with his eyes open that wasnt compressed or tiny
#library of ruina#yan library of ruina#getting comfortable doodling some objects and mannequin shapes for very obvious reasons. i read the keypage story and now it has a grip on#my brain. wanting to go ahead and plan it out and then draw the mangled memory and nightmare that replays behind the eyelids in the darknes#it was cool to see the reason confirmed from my speculation. twas indeed another reason of blocking out present pain with closing of eyes#considering they made angela have a plot important reason for doing so it would only make sense for another to have a reason for it as well#well. after having a prominent part inside the thumb/index story line. its just going to be yapping about yan now i think#let me add a spoiler tag i suppose? vauge but just incase i dont want to be an asshole. even if most already have played rhe game#library of ruina spoilers#lor spoilers#i really liked the typewritter effect over the voice after distortion. especially so when the effect finishes before the actual garbled voi#does. it makes it feel as if it were being read out after it being written down rather than of own words or volition. along with the text#upon the screen during the fight being just prescripts rather than anything relating to the man himself like the other instances with such#text had been. paired w the name of distorted yan being untranslated to keep the intent of the name being unreadable or not understandable#more into the idea of stripping away of the self or any sense of a self. not personal and not even him anymore. the following of a goal for#the goal for it is given and there isnt any hope of having the ability to not do such a thing. people yearn for a reason and something to d#and for it to be given to them to not hold responsibility nor have to do their own choices anymore. once a crushing weight weighs down#inside the face of an absolute cruelty that is perpetuated and that crushed the dreams or even desires having them be but nothing how can#one move on? it was really nice to see at the end of the fight. its easier to just say such things than to actually do them. even if the ac#ions dont even feel as if they are ones own or that there isnt any say in the matter having to endure all the pain for seemingly nothing it#still is pain. that feeling inside is still real. it still happened. regardless of the circumstances that brought them about#the thumb/index or just fingers seem to be an exaggerated to the extreme showcase of how the colletivist mindset in an unhealthy manner#could be exhibited. the thumb with its hierarchy and absoluteness and the demand for respect along with its strict layers of showing who is#below and who is above. the ability to have power over those underneath . the participation inside of it and the already brought up yearnin#to be apart of a group and to have a title and position inside of a group and of power and even a desire like from pete to join one iirc#the index being of the cruel perpetuating cycle of pain people inflict upon one another a behavior beaten and upkept by the systems as they#drift and desire to live. which causes them to partcipate in that cycle out of necessity. cruel acts upon another in order to live and seei#a need to go ahead and do such things for if they dont they die and another will just do the same to them. social sciences talk and rolands#talks abt how the city opperates reinforce that fact. the index and prescripts are really just a show inside that extreme manner and in a#more literal sense of that. it was really cool to read it..
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clfixationstation Ā· 2 months ago
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okay, it is kind of pissing me off when people insist Vi went with the Enforcers because she wanted to join them and side with Piltover and move up in society, and not because it was the only vehicle available for her to go after Jinx and solve the problem she created
(also, Vi does not want to kill her sister: she is driven by guilt. Vi feels she has a duty to stop further destruction and death from the monster she thinks she created. Jinx told Vi that her sister is gone and only Jinx, the monster, remains, and Vi believed her. After s2ep3, I don't think either of them believe that anymore)
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Vi still detests the Enforcers. You can plainly see on her face (and through her words!) that she does not want to be there. She just wants to get this over with.
if anything, Vi was trying to support Caitlyn, who is one of the only familiar things she has in her life at this moment. Her family is dead, she thinks her sister is gone, and the Undercity is barely recognizable to her - but Caitlyn was there. So, Vi took a gamble on sticking with Caitlyn, the seemingly sweet girl from Piltover who has sympathy for the Undercity, sees Vi's good heart, and helped Vi when she didn't need to.
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Vi resigned herself to join Cait's enforcers, compromising her morals, hoping to be a positive influence. But the second she made a decision for herself, the second she stopped Cait from shooting a child, Caitlyn discarded her
she's lost, trying to find her footing wherever she can. Vi has been scrambling to attach herself to any scrap of familiarity since escaping Stillwater, and now she's left alone, in the dark, again
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candiedcatnip Ā· 3 months ago
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This is honestly one of the most insightful things anyone's yet to say about Solas in-game, and not entirely for the reason they seem to be implying. "Sentimental" I guess works, but it more demonstrates how Solas struggles to see others as actual people he should care about. When Varric said people were dying as a result of his ritual Solas' rebuttal was that dying is what people do. It's inevitable and not his problem. What's the lives of others in comparison to his personal ideals of what the world should be?
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tarisilmarwen Ā· 1 year ago
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"Thrawn only joined the Empire to help the Chiss!"
Okay sure but have any of you bothered to self-examine why Thrawn chose to join the Empire instead of, say, the Republic, when that was still around? Or why he didn't chose to throw in with the Rebellion, put his tactical mind to use helping them overthrow the Empire quicker?
Could it be... perhaps... that maybe he values the Empire's military strength... more than he cares about the authoritarian tyranny with which it oppresses its own people?
Is it possible that he thinks the Empire's main problem is that it isn't effective enough, too much politicking getting in the way of sound strategy, but if he's around (and in charge) he can guide things so that those annoying little wrinkles (AKA the pockets of discontent and rebellion and fully justified anger at their rights and freedoms being trampled on) are all smoothed out and the overall Imperial machine is better, more in control of its assets, a stronger more unified bulwark against the outergalactic threat of the Grysk or the Vong or whatever.
Is it perhaps just a bit self-centered of him to only care about the Empire's ability to service his own goals and desires and be apathetic (at best) to the way it makes people suffer daily under its inherent systems? The Twi'leks and Wookies being constantly kidnapped and sold into slavery? The careless industrialization of arboreal worlds? The socialization and absorption of all private industry, forcing everyone to work through and with the Empire if they want to work at all? The systematic persecution of anyone remotely Force Sensitive? Is it not the mark of some kind of soul rot to be aware of all of that and go, "Yeah, but I don't care, they have the bigger guns, which is what I need."?
Maybe... just maybe... Thrawn has some Machiavellian tendencies and opinions and maybe this just might... make him not entirely a good person?
And maybe y'all should think about that before you come back and whine about his portrayal as a villain, as if all he has to do is explain to people that he did everything for a good reason and he gets an automatic narrative pardon for all of the shit he did while Grand Admiral that still needs to be addressed and answered for.
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fobnsfwdoodlesbackup Ā· 3 months ago
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Hi y'all, I just wanted to talk a little about the behind the scenes of what I've been up to, to give y'all a little transparency and to open myself up for any tips or input! šŸ™ Thank you for your continued support and for taking the time to look at my art šŸ«¶
First and foremost I wanted to give some transparency about my art capacity.
As og followers may remember, I started this blog when I was doing art full time. Eventually my living expenses grew and I had to go back to work. I find myself in a cycle of "I'll make more art soon, once I get a job!" And "I'll make more art soon, once I am done with this job!" I lost my most recent job suddenly, having had an extension waved over my head until the last day(October 7th). Now I'm excited to have more time for art, but I am also feeling a rush to get a new job ASAP as I've been living paycheck to paycheck. I dream of doing this work full time, I'm just scared it's not quite there yet and I worry that I come off as scammy or dishonest when I anticipate more stability around the corner.
Second, I've been struggling with the Patreon. It's taken me a while to come to terms with this, but from what I've seen Patreon is not intuitive at all from the creator end. It doesn't do a good job of organizing addresses, emails, showing who or who isn't subscribed to me, or organizing and displaying the work I put on there. I've been really shocked by this experience, since lots of big names use Patreon. It's been a great way to streamline support, but it's been unhelpful in every other regard. I would like to continue using it, but I will most likely post more wips or process videos there in the future.
Which brings me to my third point, zines. I love making zines so much, it feels personal and fulfilling and fun! However the Patreon issues make it harder to keep information in order about where to send zines, or even where to message folks about them. In addition to this, the post office has been a big barrier to me, oftentimes only being open at the same time as my dayjob. Making zines can take days, then sending them out is a whole other monster.
This work is so important to me. Drawing peoples fantasies, representing body types, creating work around sexuality and the human experience feels like what I'm meant to do. I've made comics since I was a kid. This is the dream to me. The friends I've been able to make through this work are so important to me, and the conversations have been invaluable. Not to mention fun! I wanna doodle, I wanna draw hot stuff, I wanna thirst over these dudes! I want to play!
But I also just want to be transparent about the barriers I'm working around to share that experience. I'm completely self taught, both in art AND in running shops, building websites, running 8 accounts, etc. I take a lot of time to learn the logistics of these things, and try to make them make sense for my relationship with y'all (I do not want to paywall my art!! I don't want to!!!). This year my desktop broke down (the main one I use for all paintings and digital art). I've paused my Etsy shops and my Patreon to try to catch up with things. Trying to learn to paint in a completely different program. Then lost my job with no savings.
At the end of the day I don't want anything to come between me sharing my art with you. I wish I could doodle a thing, take a picture, and post it here. No third party site, no shop, no subscription. Just sharing my art with you. I promise I'm trying to figure out how to stay as close to that as possible, and I want to thank y'all for sticking with me as I untangle all of that.
So, what can you expect in the near future?
I'm working on a couple of painting commissions right now, which you should be able to see in the next couple of days! I want to catch up on kinktober and get those posted as well. There's a comic commission in progress which I'm very eager to work on, and which I think y'all will be excited for! To ease the weight of the Patreon I think I may do less zines/polls there and more wips and process videos! If possible, I want to do more full colored work too.
Thank you again for enjoying my work, and if you have any input or tips my inbox is always open šŸ™šŸ«¶šŸ’•
#long post#info#marco lore#i wish i had time to edit this and make it nice#i just wanted to be open with yall about how much work this takes and that im trying to make it more doable#i don't want to overpromise stuff with patreon or shops and if im late sending stuff i never ever want it to come off as intentional or mali#malicious or as a scam#im just trying very hard to like ...survive. financially. and then trying to make all the logistics of thos big machine work. and then keep#up with commissions and shops and printing and mailing#god i wish i had employees but jts just me#i hand draw everything and then post it here to the word press to the ig and crop and caption and tag#then to the Patreon if it makes sense to or to the tiktok back in the day#and the formatting is all different#and i get messages across all of these platforms and I'm trying to learn a new way of painting on the fly#on top of that im supposed to be running my two Etsy shops too which im not right now because..broadly gestures#my nervous system can only take losing a job so often. the rug was really pulled feom under me in this one. i thought id have more time#i don't want to sound like I'm whining and i don't want to give up on all of this#i want to be very very very clear that art is what i love and who i am and what i want to do#i want to be posting on the daily again#i just need to evaluate what that looks like everytime life changes#I'm seriously so grateful for those of y'all that have joined the Patreon or bought stuff from the shop i really don't mean to drop the ball#so many times#y'all have literally been the difference between me making rent or not and I'm so worried that i don't make enough art to give back to that#relationship#im trying my best#okay anyways im posting this
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kirisclangen Ā· 9 months ago
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Canarydrop and their two adopted kits, Ospreykit and Palekit
Canarydrop: Any pronouns, 73 moons, genderfluid
Ospreykit: he/him, 1 moon, cis tom
Palekit: he/him, 1 moon, cis tom
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dapperrokyuu Ā· 9 months ago
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Needing a Sua perspective from the ALNST auditions to Round 1. I never put much thought into what happens to the cast post-Anakt Garden graduation (do they immediately go to the auditions? Is there a period of time where they dont see each other until they recognize each other at the audition? Theres a considerable amount of time between the auditions and their Alien Stage season, did they see each other often between then or...? etc.), but regardless, imagine being her and having to choose between sabotaging your own audition so you dont have to go the the Sing, Win, or Die Show or putting your in your all in hopes of winning and spending just a bit more time with this girl you love because you know itll likely be the last time you see her. Imagine...
#dee p thoughts#alien stage#alnst#vivinos#like. not as if life wouldve been sunshine and rainbows if sua failed the audition and never went on alien stage hashtag Im a Pet to Aliens#but like. sua was definitely more in the know. Im not the type to believe mizi was completely naive but I think mizi may have bought into#the idea that dying Wasnt That Bad due to what she was taught and her trust in her owners...until round 1- maybe mizi was confident she'd#truly win and/or her owners praised and made her feel so. sua: ''My dream is Mizi's dream. (paraphrased)'' etc etc#maybe it was the dream of mizi's owners that mizi wanted to fulfill or mizi just wanted to impress her owners in return for their care...#but sua knew. she knew it would either be she never sees mizi again whether she dies or achieve such fame that sua could never reach her...#or sua can spend a little time with her. whatever they have left. whether it was her or mizi the likelihood of them ever seeing each other#again... because mizi is intent on this. she is going to join alien stage. she is going to pass the auditions because she is so dazzling.#...I need to be with her.#I think considering the ivan and sua comic anakt garden may be a pipeline to alien stage? its functionally a music school iirc so I think i#at least gives them a leg up and humans are put into anakt garden with at least some intention of having them try out for alien stage-#but nonetheless I imagine there was a liminal space where none of the cast really knew where their lives were going post-anakt garden.#not that they have much choice in the matter but still dalkjdalkbn- that liminal space mustve been a dark time for majority of them#because well. their owners. and they couldnt meet each other and may never meet again...#regarding the time between the auditions and their alien stage season I imagine its funnily a lot of. training. pr vocals visuals...#they have autographs despite them all potentially dying quickly they had them draft and practice and perfect autographs guys adjlkbnadlfkjf#the look mizi and sua shared in sweet dream when they both passed the auditions together...AUGH.....
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waspgrave Ā· 2 months ago
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Working on my Rook backstory again and Iā€™m very open to accepting the canon backstory for Mercar but mine is going to address how strange it is that this human soldier from Tevinter saw a random elf baby in Ventus, near the Arlathan forest which is šŸ¤Ø, and decided ā€˜my baby nowā€™. Sir, donā€™t you think the baby bird probably belongs to the bird nest itā€™s right beside?? You canā€™t just adopt that bc the nest is empty right now
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princess-of-the-corner Ā· 10 months ago
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Amnesia!Dabi: "So, did I get on okay with my dad?" / Everyone else: *sweats nervously* "UHHHHHH-"
YEAH ABOUT THAT
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forzafinally Ā· 3 months ago
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I don't even know what to say
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sailorsleepymoon Ā· 4 months ago
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Whole squad is in the discord vc except the one transfem friend before dnd starts and one of them refers to her using they asking if anyone knows when sheā€™s coming. and you go. She said sheā€™d probably be here but someone should message her :) also I noticed that weā€™ve all been using they/them for her but I checked her pronoun roles in a different server weā€™re all in and the only ones she has are she/her :) so we should proba
And you get cut off by the person who said it and one of the other people going ā€œOH well I use they/them for everyoneā€ and ā€œyeah I just kinda always default to they/themā€ and ā€œyeah same I just always use themā€ talking over each other and
And the impulse to bring out your academic essay from sjw university hits. There is the sharp impulse to go šŸ¤Ø you guys using they/them for her when we know her pronouns is degendering her and ultimately feeding into the larger structure of transmisogyny and
you ignore it and say ok well I think :) we should try anyway šŸ’• to use her right pronouns
And thereā€™s the quiet consensus of like yeah ok thatā€™s fair thatā€™s true. and she joins the vc three seconds later
#ven.txt#the one other nb person in the group did go like oh youā€™re right thatā€™s fair when I said it#so shoutout them theyā€™re a real one#but I really did not expect the jump to defensiveness from the two friends !!! one of whom was not even the one who said it then!!!#and like the whole group has done it to the point where I once started using they for her because I thought I must be wrong#but I checked her roles and no it was she her. weeeee#but the immediate defensiveness really gets me!!! I had to be like noooo itā€™s not just you doing it ok haha everyone has#and the one who hadnā€™t even said it that time was the other who jumped to defensiveness is my boyfriend šŸ˜­#so I do need to talk to him about that but I donā€™t know when thatā€™s gonna happen#since heā€™s been really struggling and feeling like shit recently#and somehow I donā€™t think going hey honey can we talk about how some of your actions are influenced and reinforce#the societal structure of transmisogyny? while heā€™s already doing poorly will go well#and like. oooooo I wanted to be the Soldier Ally who Explains Their Transmisogyny so bad in that moment I wanted to be the white knight#and there is a world where I confronted them and did that#but in this one I went. I donā€™t want to start a fight before dnd#and I donā€™t want her to join vc to hear us arguing about her pronouns and about transmisogyny when sheā€™s the only tma person#and so I did not start a fight.#anyway. hope my boyfriend does not see this lmao#but he usually only looks at the posts I send him#uh if he does see this. I know neither of you had malicious intentions or wanted to be hurtful or anything#and Iā€™m not trying to say that you are anything I just think that like#growing up in a transmisogynist world makes you absorb some stuff and some habits without realizing it#and that you should maybe be a little more careful and aware of your actions and thoughts and like how they could be influenced by that#anyway. weirder to experience the situations when you can put a name and systematic influence to the things happening when b4 you couldnā€™t
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swordsonnet Ā· 8 days ago
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#today a good friend of mine told me they want to stop seeing me because they were interested in a romantic relationship and i'm not#we met on a dating app but i thought we had more of a platonic relationship#at least that's what it felt like. i honestly didn't think they were interested in me like that#i can't really imagine anyone having romantic feelings for me. hell i can barely wrap my head around people liking me platonically#i definitely should've communicated my intentions better but at the same time i was kind of confused about what i even wanted#i'm 24 and i've never been in a relationship. i've never fallen in love. i've had crushes but they've all been on a more superficial level#and none of them led anywhere#i think i just joined the dating app because i felt like it was expected of me. because other people my age are in relationships#and i'm falling behind just like in everything else#i think i might be aromantic but i also don't want to be. i want to fall in love and find someone to spend my life with.#but i don't seem to have the capacity for it. and i can't help but feel like i'm broken. like i've failed at being human#and to top it all off i lost a good friend. actually the only friend i had in this city#i have two other close friends but one lives in a different city and the other lives on a different continent#i also have a cold and my period started yesterday so. uhhh. not a good day overall lmao#will probably delete this later but i just needed to scream into the void#looks like i've got something to discuss with my therapist on wednesday
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sskk-manifesto Ā· 6 months ago
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#Fifteen episode 2. Mmmmmmhhhhhh#The animation quality DOES get worse. This episode shows it lol#So many static frames stretching for so long... I feel so sorry for the animators.#I still stand by the fact that if studios can't provide enough budget or time to their animators seasons simply shouldn't be released.#But after all who am I to talk...#The scene of Dazai shooting at the soldier makes my blood freeze. Rimbaud throwing books in the fire is equally upsetting#Like I /know/ it's an anime about literature with constant metafiction referencesā€“#and that this too has a symbolic meaning and is *supposed* to be upsetting but that said.#Seeing whole books being thrown in the fire is such a disturbing sight that calls for such a visceral response in me šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­#The amv opening is nice! Makes me even more bitter about season 5 one lmao. Of the kind#ā€œnot only we had to get a amv opening (((while we deserved a wholly ss/kk focused opening)))ā€š we even got a bad amv ending at thatā€#Mmmmhhhh I hateeeeeee how they handled the Sheep šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­ Seriously this is just another bug instance of#ā€œme and the author have WHOLLY different views of what human nature is likeā€#I just... Don't think... Children joining together in an hostile environment would act like that. I'm so much more of a t/pn kind of guy.#Children who come together to survive would protect each other and especially would trust each other. Why is there such a big lack of trust#Why doesn't Shirase trust Chuuya? Why doesn't Chuuya trust Shirase (with handling more information)? It's just dumb#It's dumb. It sounds stupid from the very plot aspect that Chuuya would act so shady and suspicious with the Sheep instead of being openā€“#about what his course of action is. It's like he was trying to have them turn on him. It's stupid of Shirase to mistrust Chuuyaā€“#when in eight years he never gave them any reason to doubt of him.#And I know right as I'm writing this that someone is going to read it and think ā€œyou're completely missing on the unbalance of power thatā€“#creates these dynamics of lack of trustā€ but the thing is exactly that I don't see why that unbalance of power would ever come to be!#They're all just kids. They're aware of that. If Chuuya never had malicious intentions towards Shiraseā€š I don't see why he would ever fearā€“#his betrayal. Likewiseā€š I don't see why Shirase and the other Sheep members would ever be so manipulative and disrespectful towardsā€“#Chuuya if he's been nothing but kind to them (and we have no reason to think otherwise)?#It all comes down to: I think people are inherently good and willing to help each other. The author thinks not lmao. It is what it is#But I wish you could see t/pn. Where kids are constantly trying to outwit each other in order to OUT-SACRIFICE THEMSELVES for the others lo#I love t/pn it's my life... I miss it#random rambles#And if anyone would like to argue that Dazai specifically set them off to betray each other... Yes I DO understand that's what the storyā€“#is suggesting. I just don't think Dazai - for how good. and infallible he is - is enough to scrape long-term relationships of trust.
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moon-lv3r Ā· 8 months ago
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idk if this is an unpopular opinion but iā€™m sick of people excusing bad behaviours with excuses like ā€œbut xx just wanted to protect xx!!!ā€ ā€œtheyā€™re a complex character!!! youā€™re just mischaracterising them!!! theyā€™re a good brother/sister/parent!!!ā€ and say stuff like how you donā€™t get their character if you hate them for their actions even if you know why they do it and still donā€™t like them
neglect is still neglect
abuse is still abuse
right intentions but wrong executions are still bad šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­
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