#that movie had me so rapt the first time i watched it

[merakiui]

SLASHERSCARASLASHERSCARASLASHERSCARA

I have a soft spot for slashers, and as I've been rewashing a few of them, mouchey keeps worming his way into my brain.

While most people see him as a Ghostface (it's hot), I can see him filling the roles of a lot of different slashers.

Him as Brahms from The Boy, where you're a babysitter hired to watch over a doll (name can vary given he has too many) who has very specific rules. Meanwhile, the REAL mouchey is living in the walls, watching you, and becoming more and more obsessed. He even has a fake version of you to cuddle with. (The mommy issues will be very strong here)

Or maybe he's more of a Billy Lenz from Black Christmas. Your sorority house keeps getting, disturbing calls. They're erratic, violent, and sexual, but they don't seem to stop. What you don't know is that "The Moaner," as he's been called, is in the house, calling from within. He starts picking off the other people in the house on by one, leaving him with you.

Hannibal from the NBC show can also fit with him and his many names, as before starting his spree in America, he was known in Italy as the Monster of Florence. Mouchey is a well-known man in the area, cultured and has great dinner parties. He's also an investigator on the string of murders going on as of late. Given his composed exterior, nobody suspects that he's the one going around murdering people to serve at his parties, and for his own enjoyment.

I could go on and on abot slashers that mouchey could be, so I'll stop here.

- ⭐️ anon

SLASHER SCARA.......... (⸝⸝๑ ̫ ๑⸝⸝⸝) omg,,,

I feel like Childe would make for such a great Ghostface, but that's a ramble for another time. >:D Ghostface Scara is so yummy omg!!! But you're so right! He can fit as so many slashers!!!!

All of these are so big brain, but the one I love the most would have to be Brahms Scara because it's just so real and true to me. <3 the pretty porcelain doll who you think might be haunted the longer you spend looking after him, tenderly treating him as if he's a real boy, only to later find out the real Scara (the version who is actually a full-grown man) is living in the walls... AAAAAA GROSS, SLIMY SCARA IN THE WALLS WITH HIS RAGING MOMMY KINK. OTL OTL ⭐️ anon, you've given me such a delicious brain worm omg!!!!

He's so attached to you, so obsessed even though you haven't even been there for that long. But he knows you're the one because you're so sweet and affectionate and there's something so motherly about you...... he's never letting you go now. :) omg omg omg maybe the doll is modeled after Kabukimono, but the real version is Scara....... this cute angel of doll versus the gross, obsessed wall-dwelling stalker who loves you more than anything,,, somno with him....... 😵‍💫

[shotmrmiller]

A/N: I simply had to join on writing for John 'just the tip' MacTavish so. Here goes. Unedited, its horny its explicit yall know the deal. It was supposed to be a drabble and i got completely carried away. got me out the writing slump tho. any mistakes please ignore. CBF!Johnny because I say so.

Johnny 'Soap' MacTavish x F!Reader

WC: 1.6K

Flipping through Netflix, you hear a rapt at the door. You turn to look at your dad, who gets up quickly as if expecting someone. 

“Johnny, my boy! I’m glad you could make it! Had me thinking you forgot all about us. Come on in!” Your dad pulls Johnny in for an affectionate embrace that he returns immediately.

“Och, yer aff yer heid! As if I could ever forget my second family!” Giving your dad a final pat on the back, Johnny steps back. “Now where’s my girl?” 

Lifting the hand holding the remote, you call out. “Present!” 

Johnny almost trips over the coffee table, rushing to you. He doesn’t wait for you to stand up, just snatches your wrist and lifts you for a hug— your socked feet dangling by his shins. With his strong arms wrapped around you, he pulls you close, nuzzling his face against your neck. “Missed ye, bonnie,” he murmurs, “missed ye so much.” 

As you exhale a wheezy breath, you tell him, “I love you too, Johnny, but I can’t breathe.” One last squeeze, and a squealed “Johnny!” he finally relents, setting you down. 

Hands resting on your shoulders, his striking blue eyes lock onto your face, flicking across your features, as if he was re-memorizing what you look like. His intense gaze rushes blood to your cheeks, but don’t shrink under it. It wouldn’t be the first time your best friend teases you like this. “Somethin’ on my face, Johnny boy?” and bat your lashes at him, “I know I’m staggering to look at, but now you’re just being shameless.” 

He lets out a huff, a small smirk gracing his lips, and mumbles, “Don’t I know it.” Your taunting smile falls off your face at that. What? Before you can even ask him what he means by that, your dad calls him into the kitchen. 

“Johnny! Come get a beer, it’s about to be movie time!” Without breaking eye contact, he answers him, “Aye! Comin’!’ and with a finger tap to the underside of your chin, walks away. Heart pounding against your chest, you head towards your bedroom to get a blanket, hoping the little walk calms the butterflies in your stomach. 

What?

The movie is playing, and Johnny is curled up behind you on the reclined sofa, roughened palm resting on your thigh, occasionally squeezing it. You’re mortified at the slight arousal you’re feeling just at being caressed by Johnny. Johnny. Your best friend. Who has consistently had girlfriends, who will never look at you that way. You’ve never thought of him that way either, granted, but that’s what makes this so embarrassing. Maybe you’re ovulating, biology simply reacting in the presence of a virile male, or something. 

And then you feel the unmistakable bulge of his stiffening cock, faintly pressing against your arse. Gods. Heat radiating off of your face, you bite your lip and try to discreetly wiggle away, for his sake and yours. However, Johnny seems to disagree with your thoughts because he moves his hand from your thigh to grab your hips in a bruising grip, fingers digging into your hipbones, forcing you to be still.

He leans into your ear, warm breath tickling your cheek and softly whispers, “Dinnae move, hen,” and sluggishly starts to rock his hips, erection now firmly rubbing against your sleeping shorts. Johnny’s movements are imperceptible, nonexistent underneath your blanket. Not that it would matter, because the movie is reaching its climax, and all eyes are glued to the screen.

But your mind is solely focused on Johnny— the heat of his hands scorching against your skin, his prominent length hidden underneath his pajama bottoms grinding on you. 

“Lift yer leg a wee bit, hen.” Keeping a watchful gaze on your parents, you silently plead that they won’t notice as you hide your compliance under the guise of trying to make yourself comfortable. Once settled, you lowered your leg and had to bite your tongue with force, to keep the moan from slithering out of your throat. 

His cock, bare, right in between your thighs. Like warm velvet wrapped around steel, thick, heavy, tip pushing against your core with every minute thrust. Johnny moves even closer, arm tight around your waist, hand sliding into your bottoms, heading straight towards your soaked, swollen clit to rub feather-light delectable circles on it.

“I’m gonna stick just the tip in, a’right? I swear,” he says in a hushed tone, as he pulls back to lower the waistband of your shorts to rest on your upper thighs, “just,” he thrusts once, “the”, again, “tip.” and his leaking head slips into your hole— pushing it in until your walls flutter around it. 

“Ye feel incredible, squeeze that tight pus—” your dripping cunt cuts him off, drawing out a hiss of surprise from him. His subdued voice in your ear is so seductive, so bewitching, that you can’t help but clench around him. 

For most of the movie, Johnny languidly thrusts into you, truly keeping to his word. Just the tip— teasing you, making you drip onto the sofa, muted squishy, gooey noises coming from under your blanket, and you couldn’t be bothered by any of it. Flared, ridged head catching on your slippery lips with every drag of his cock. You’re drooling on your hand that covers your mouth beneath the snug blanket— struggling to hold back the mewls and whimpers threatening to escape. 

All of a sudden, Johnny mutters, “The movie’s about ta end, close yer eyes and keep completely still. Stabilize and deepen yer breathin’, hen.” Without hesitation, you do as he says, body going limp in compliance, the only tell-tale sign of your excitability being the rapid pulsing of your jugular on the delicate skin of your neck. 

The TV is turned off, and the living room goes completely silent, apart from the deafening sound of blood rushing in your ears. Johnny behind you feigns quiet snoring, so believable that if it wasn’t for his throbbing cock still at your entrance, you’d think he actually fell asleep.

Your dad’s poor imitation of a whisper cuts through the quiet. 

“They’re asleep, let’s just leave them here.” Footsteps shuffle as they tip-toe around you both, and as they get farther away, Johnny slowly moves his hand to cover yours, truly weighing down on it. The instant their door clicks shut, he uses his other hand to pick up your leg and throw it over your shoulder, and thrusts hard, deep, until his bollocks are flush against your arse. Your nails claw at the hand over your mouth as you scream, your gummy walls stretching against his assault— a burn so exquisite, pleasure teetering on the edge of pain, achingly delicious, it sends tendrils of ecstasy directly into your veins.

He lets out a guttural moan, one only you could hear, private, intimate. “It’s about time ye let me have this sweet pussy, hen.” One vicious thrust that punches the air from your lungs and rattles the sofa, and then another, when he finally speaks again. “Fuck, we hae ta do this when we are nae restricted, hm?” His hips start a slow rhythm, long, unhurried undulating thrusts, and every time he bottoms out, he grinds his pubic bone on your clit, the tip of his cock giving your cervix a lewd kiss. Every time he reaches the entrance of your womb, it feels like he wants to go in further, to go past the dead end, and your cock drunk mind only thinks about how you want him to do it, too. 

“Yer slobberin’ all over my hand, hen. S’that good, is it? Oooh, I ken it is. Only the best fer my girl, hm?” He hisses through clenched teeth, “I’m fuckin’ close. Come f’me. I’m not comin’ until ye cover my cock with yer cream, leave a white ring at the base.” His hips have been moving at the same exact speed he started at, not a stutter in his pattern. As if him fucking you into a puddle of arousal wasn’t taxing on his part. 

Then he does something different, something that threatens to snap that coil in your lower tummy, and along with it your sanity. He starts giving shallow thrusts, never pulling out more than halfway, and makes sure to rub against your clit, giving you that heavenly friction you need. It has you delirious, fervent, and you start moving your own hips, uncaring of how you must look.

Johnny moves his thumb down to your nub, drawing tight, precise, merciless circles on it, and you are thrown over the edge— more like kicked off by a spartan kick from how gut-wrenching your orgasm is ripped from you. Your pleasure is so acute, so powerful that there are needle-like pricks on the shell of your ears. Your body shakes underneath Johnny, pussy throbbing and pulsing with the aftershocks of your blinding climax. 

Drool escapes under Johnny’s palm, dripping down your cheeks and into your hair as you fall back, going completely limp, utterly spent. Finally getting back some coherency, you realize that Johnny’s gone soft inside of you, also drained, as he catches his breath holding himself over you. He removes his hand, uncaring that it’s sticky with your spit, and noses your cheekbone, nudging you to slant his lips over yours, curling his tongue against yours. He swallows the pathetic mewl you let out and presses one final kiss onto your lips. 

“I’ve missed ye, hen. I’m so happy to be here, with ye. Let’s move to your bedroom, and in 10 minutes, I’ll give ye a proper fuckin’.” 

Your eyes close shut as you let out a resigned but elated sigh. 

“I love you too, Johnny.” 

@rookiesbookies and forgive the tag but i had you in mind too @brewed-pangolin ill never do it again unprompted

part 2

[ataliagold]

you told me once that i'm selfish (and i kissed you hard, in the dark)

For @astrangersummer week 4 prompt 'outside'. Title from Letter to an Old Poet by boygenius.

Pairing: Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson

Rating: General

W/C: 1430

Tags: Established Steddie, minor angst, fluff, hand-holding, Steve just wants to go hiking but Eddie's not keen on the idea, until he is, despite a minor argument these boys are so soft for each other, slightly selfish Eddie but he apologizes, Eddie gets a cool stick

Summary: Steve is used to spending time doing what Eddie wants to do. On a hot summer afternoon, the tables are turned when Steve asks Eddie to go hiking with him and Eddie is...not so thrilled about it.

___

“A hike?”

“Yup.”

“You want to go…hiking?”

“Uh huh.”

“You want me to go hiking with you?”

“Yes, Eddie.”

“…I’m not sure that’s the best idea.”

“Why not?”

“Well, we could do…something else. Go to the arcade! Catch a movie, get drunk by your pool…I can come up with many alternatives to hiking, big boy.”

“I want to go, it’s one I used to do often years ago. It’ll be fun, just try it. It’s summer, we should get outdoors, enjoy the sun.”

“I’m not really an outdoors kinda guy, Steve. I thought you knew that by now.”

Steve’s shoulders had slumped a little at that. He’d watched as Eddie screwed up his nose at Steve’s suggestion, as he shook his head vehemently, as he rolled his eyes a little at Steve’s insistence that it would be a nice way to spend their Sunday.

Eddie didn’t want to go. That was ok; Steve wouldn’t make him. It had been stupid to even ask him in the first place, he supposed – Eddie was right, it really wasn’t his sort of thing.

Except…Steve had spent long evenings watching Eddie and the kids playing their campaigns, had listened as best he could as Eddie rattled off ideas and suggestions to him for the next D&D session, had sat through the frankly terrible horror movies that Eddie was rapt with, always let him play his music in the car, shrugged it off good-naturedly when Eddie complained about his taste in music…

Steve been hoping maybe Eddie would try something that he enjoyed, just for a day.

He knew Eddie hated sport and practically any form of intentional exercise; hell, his boyfriend reminded him of that frequently, grumbling when Steve and Wayne were glued to a game on TV or when Steve was busy shooting hoops with Lucas. Usually, Steve didn’t care – he knew they had different interests, loved Eddie enough that it didn’t matter.

But sometimes, Eddie’s jibes about him being a jock or a philistine or uncultured just…stung a little, especially considering Steve never bit back with his own insults, had left those days long behind him.

“Yeah, ok,” Steve mumbled eventually. “I’ll just…I’ll ask Lucas or something.”

Eddie shook his head. “He’s at Mike’s this weekend.”

“Oh. Well…never mind, then.”

Eddie sat up, grabbing for Steve’s hand. Steve let him take it, but with little enthusiasm.

“We can do something else, though,” Eddie said brightly. “Wanna rent a couple of movies, get high? I’ve still got some of Argyle’s stuff left, we could…Steve?”

Steve’s hand had gone weak in Eddie’s, his gaze drifting downwards. “Hmm?”

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

Eddie shuffled closer, tilted his head to try and catch Steve’s eye. “Steeeeevie,” he hummed.

“What?” Steve said, snapping a little.

Eddie recoiled slightly. “What’s got your panties in a twist?”

Steve snatched his hand back, pushing off Eddie’s couch to stand up. “Nothing, it’s fine. I’m gonna go for this hike, I’ll see you later.”

Eddie frowned, hopping up to block Steve’s path. “On your own?” he questioned.

“Well, you clearly don’t want to go, so…”

Eddie’s face softened. “Steve -”

“No, it’s fine. You hate the outdoors, you hate exercise, you hate…” Steve trailed off.

Eddie reached out, traced a hand across Steve’s cheek. “What, sweetheart?”

Steve sucked in a breath. “You hate everything I like,” he mumbled, not meeting Eddie’s eye.

Eddie’s eyes widened, realization crossing his face. “Stevie…I…I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you wanted to go so badly. Let me just…I’ll get changed, and we’ll go, ok?”

“No, you don’t want to.”

“I do.”

Steve scoffed. “You don’t.”

Eddie nodded slightly, chewed his bottom lip for a moment. “I didn’t want to,” he admitted eventually. “But…you do things you don’t want to do for me all the time, and I know I’m not…as good at doing that as you are. So, the afternoon is yours. You want to hike? We’ll hike. I can’t promise I won’t pass out halfway, but I’ll be there.”

Steve gave him a long look. “You’re sure? And you won’t complain?”

“Well…maybe a little.”

Steve rolled his eyes, waving a hand in frustration.

“Ok!” Eddie back-peddled. “Ok, I won’t. Just…I have one request.”

“What?”

“I want to carry a cool stick.”

*****

Eddie got his stick.

Steve led them on the wooded path that branched off from Lover’s Lake, that looped its way slowly up a hill to a lookout spot over the forest. Eddie traipsed along behind him, swatting at invisible orcs with his stick, occasionally skipping off to one side to pick up and present Steve with various stones and small rocks he found along the way, the ones he deemed pretty enough to gift to him.

Halfway up, despite sweating and breathing a little harder than he should be, (smoker’s lungs, he’d given Steve as an excuse) Eddie seemed to putting in a lot of effort for Steve.

“This is…kinda cool,” he admitted.

“Really?” Steve raised an eyebrow at his boyfriend.

Eddie nodded, whacked at a bush with his stick and grinned. “Yeah. At least it’s shady here too, it’s not so fucking hot.”

Steve smiled. “Told ya. Wait till we get to the top, too. I think you’ll like the view.”

“About that…how much steeper does it get?”

A short time later, and only one little moan from Eddie about the hill, and they broke through the trees and onto a rocky outcrop with a little bench seat. The trees sprawled out below them, shades of brown and burnt orange, Hawkins nestled off to one side.

“Wow,” Eddie breathed, bent over next to Steve with his hands on his knees as he got his breath back.

Steve, not puffed in the least, nodded in agreement. “It’s nice, huh?”

“It’s like…Lothlorien.”

“…sure,” Steve offered, having no idea what his boyfriend was talking about.

Eddie slumped down on the bench seat, fingers tracing over the initials carved everywhere into the old wood.

“You on here, Stevie?” he asked.

Steve nodded, dropping to his knees and searching the edge of the seat for a moment. There, etched permanently into the wood, were the weathered initials S.H.

“Here,” he said.

Eddie smiled, touched his fingers to the marks. Quietly, he scratched his own into the wood with a sharp stick, right next to Steve’s initials.

“Looks good,” Steve observed.

Eddie looked up at him, took his hand. “Steve?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“For…not taking enough interest in the things you like.”

Steve sighed, sat down beside him. “You don’t have to, Eds. I know you don’t like a lot of the things I do, it’s -”

“Don’t say it’s ok,” Eddie interrupted, holding his hand tighter. “I mean, maybe I don’t like sport and stuff. But you don’t like D&D, and I know you hate horror movies, but you don’t complain about it, and you always come along even if you don’t enjoy something.”

“I…I like spending time with you,” Steve said quietly.

“I know, and I love you for it.” Eddie’s free hand gripped the edge of the seat. “And…and I like spending time with you too, and I want to be able to do some things that you enjoy too, it’s only fair.”

“Well…did you enjoy this?” Steve asked, almost shyly.

Eddie nodded. “Yeah, actually. Nearly had a heart attack near the top there, but aside from that…” he grinned as he pulled a small laugh from Steve. “I’d like to go again. Wherever you want to go, I’ll be there.”

“I’d like that, Eds.”

“Good.” Eddie dug around in his pocket for a moment, producing a smooth black stone and plopping it into Steve’s hand. “For you,” he said, smiling when Steve turned it over in his fingers.

“It’s cool, Eds. Thanks.”

Eddie’s smile was wider than the sun.

He leant in, kissed Steve long and slow under the fading July sun.

By the time they reached the car again, Steve’s pockets were laden with little stones that had caught Eddie’s eye along the path. Despite them weighing down his shorts, he couldn’t bear to toss any of them away – he’d find somewhere to put them in their room.

As Steve started the beamer, he was surprised to see Eddie eject the Metallica tape in the player and replace it with Steve’s well-loved Tears for Fears one.

He threw a surprised look at Eddie, who shrugged in return.

“It’s well overdue for your turn, sweetheart,” he murmured softly.

As the familiar notes of Head Over Heels spilled over them, Steve reached for Eddie’s hand.

He didn’t let go the whole way home.

___

[lovexdeepspace]

“life without you.”

summary; months after breaking up with them, they come for reconciliation.

warnings; heartbreak, break-ups

note; wowowow the first part to this blew up and i am so beyond thankful for all the love! after this comes more requests :D

!! divider by @cafekitsune !!

first part | angst ending

“we should probably see other people.”

༊*·˚. xavier

it had been a couple of months since you broke things off with xavier and the way his face had contorted into one of subtle shock made you feel, well, better about things. although it had pained you to say the words, knowing that he was instantly hit with something — be it guilt, regret, sadness, whatever — made you feel better knowing it meant he still cared enough about you.

though the months of silence that followed had you second guessing that notion, no matter how many times you tried to tell yourself it was normal for this to happen and that you should take advantage of this time. you would never admit to anyone the many nights you would spend on your couch, waiting around late at night hoping that knock would come on your door and your sleepy hunter would be on the other side.

perhaps you ended up manifesting it one too many times, however, because now you stand pj-clad in your doorway with one hand on your hip and a raised brow as xavier held out a round, marshmallow-looking stuffed bunny to you.

“what’s this?” you deadpanned, knowing exactly what he was doing — you just wanted to hear him say it.

xavier’s lips pressed into a tight line as he avoided your eyes and muttered, “i really screwed up. i didn’t realize how good things were with you until i lost you.”

you stayed silent, motioning for him to continue when he glanced your way.

“i don’t deserve to ask you for forgiveness, let alone should i expect you to take me back,” he said, holding your gaze, “but i’d be even more of a fool not to try. i’m so, so sorry i put you in such a shitty situation.”

xavier pushed the bunny a little closer to you, brightening a bit as you took it into your arms. it was soft and downright adorable, a stuffed reflection of the man in front of you(though, again, something else on the list of things that wouldn’t be admitted by you).

“i don’t expect you to answer me any time soon,” he added quickly, filling the silence, “so i’ll just —“

“xavier.”

the blonde immediately shut his mouth, giving you his rapt attention. with a sigh you look from the bunny to him before extending a hand to him, albeit hesitantly.

“i was in the middle of watching a movie,” you said, earning a confused look. “do you want to finish it with me?”

if your heart wasn’t racing by that point, the way xavier’s face broke out in a grin before he grabbed your hand excitedly and pulled you into your own apartment had it pounding against your rib cage like a drum.

༊*·˚. rafayel

you recieved a torrent of snarky, snappy texts following your brief break-up with rafayel. he switched between gaslighting you that nothing was happening and that you were overreacting to him acting nonchalant about the whole thing; it was so bad that you had to block his number before you even got back to your apartment, which was a few blocks away.

it was weird to not have your phone blowing up all day long but, at the same time, the silence was a sort of reprieve while you dealt with the emotional repercussions of the whole situation. it allowed you some peace of mind and gave you the space needed to cope and, with the months that followed, grow more comfortable with not being in a relationship anymore.

you had finally found yourself at peace once again, keeping yourself busy with things to do like trying out the new restaurant downtown. as you were getting ready to head out, a knock came from your front door.

“just a minute!” you called, adjusting the collar of your blouse in the mirror before heading to the door and opening it. “oh.”

standing in front of you was rafayel and thomas, the latter giving you a sweet smile and a wave.

“nice to see you!” he chirped before giving rafayel a shove on the shoulder and gesturing to you. “i’ll be in the car.”

“good seeing you, too, thomas,” you called as he walked off, then turned to rafayel. “so. it took your manager forcing you for you to come see me?”

rafayel pouted at you and crossed his arms over his chest. “last i checked, you’re the one who blocked my number.”

you barked out a laugh, unsure as to why you’d be surprised about the audacity of this man. “well, maybe it’s because you tried to downplay my feelings!”

“well i’m sorry, okay?” rafayel retorted, matching your raised volume. “there, happy?”

“happy?” you echoed, running a hand down your face. “rafayel, if you really think —”

“you’re right.”

you froze, biting back the rest of your statement and raising a brow. “i’m right?”

rafayel nodded, dropping his arms to his sides. “i fucked up. like truly, undoubtedly fucked up. and here i am, thinking i can just say sorry and fix it all but that’s not how it works. i’ve got this whole front to keep up to protect my stupid ego but. . .” he sniffles and you realize there are tears in his eyes but he continues before you can speak up.

“fuck my ego,” he spat, clearly more angry at himself with every word he spoke. “my life has been complete and utter shit without you in it. i thought i knew what i was doing but i was wrong and i can’t even begin to express how sorry i am. i don’t deserve forgiveness or anything from you but gods you deserved an apology and i hope this is at least somewhat sufficient.”

rafayel sniffled again, the tip of his nose reddening as he wiped at his eyes. you were shocked to say the least, rooted to the spot as you watched the man you always thought to be so invulnerable breaking down in front of you.

slowly you reached out and your hands pulled his away from his face. he looked at you with wide, teary eyes as your hands cupped his face, your thumbs brushing the few remaining tears away. he whispered your name and you sighed, feeling all the hardened feelings towards the artist and your breakup softening to mush.

“i’ve missed you,” he whispered, leaning into your touch, and everything gets thrown out the window as you press a quick kiss to his forehead, then his cheeks, then the corner of his lips.

“i missed you too,” you said quietly. “come inside — i’ll tell thomas that i’ll drive you home later.”

༊*·˚. zayne

his coldness towards you was to be expected but still stung more than you could’ve expected. what made the break-up even worse was that you had to do it at the hospital and she was present for it all. you had tripped over your words and felt like a fool but knew, deep down, it needed to be done to prevent you from spending another sleepless night.

you had accounted for the way you’d feel when you’d find his clothes in your laundry; you’d accounted for the way your heart would surge whenever the rare occurrence came that you’d see him out and about in linkon city; everything was thought out and prepared for to avoid feeling too harshly.

what you had failed to account for, however, was how you’d feel when you came home one day to find zayne sitting on your couch with at least ten different bouquets of flowers surrounding him.

first it was shock — you quite literally dropped all your belongings. zayne raised an eyebrow at your reaction as if it wasn’t incredibly surprising to see him sitting in your apartment after having months of no contact.

second it was realization — you hadn’t taken your spare key back. as soon as it hit you your shock wore off and you groaned, running a hand down your face. after a long day at work this was the last thing you were expecting and needed.

last came the indifference. you gestured to him, then to the door. zayne stood slowly and walked around the bouquets, heading for the door. you were surprised up until he shut the door and headed back to his original spot on the couch.

“zayne,” you deadpanned. “that was a sign for you to leave.”

“do you really want me to leave?” the doctor asked, his steely gaze sending shivers down your spine.

no. “why are you even here?” you asked, defeated, purposely avoiding the question. “months of not talking and you suddenly appear in my apartment? what gives?”

“i need to apologize,” zayne replied bluntly, gesturing to the plethora of flowers surrounding him. “did the flowers not make that obvious? are they not enough? should i have gotten more?”

he looked somewhat distraught as he looked around him and you shook your head with a sigh to cover up the way the corners of your mouth twitched. you’d hardly seen zayne so stressed let alone stressed over flowers and if they were enough for you.

“zayne, the flowers are lovely,” you assured him. “more than i know what to do with, though.”

zayne nodded slowly, a bit more at ease. he stood once more and walked over to you, stopping right in front of you. he took a deep breath and looked you square in the eye, though you noted the way his eyes flitted down to your lips for a split second.

“what i did, how i treated you, all of it was unacceptable,” he said softly and you couldn’t help but already feel him worming his way through your walls. “i don’t know what i was thinking — or if i was even thinking at all. you are the most caring, respectful, and loving partner anyone could ever ask for. i was so lucky to have you by my side and i foolishly messed everything up.”

you wanted to reach out and wrap your arms around him, truly, but he still looked as if he had more to say so you held yourself back for a moment longer.

“you are everything to me,” he said, “and i will do whatever i need to do to regain your trust, your love, everything. however long it takes — days, months, years, nothing else matters to me more than you.”

you were in awe of the man standing before you, so moved by his words and actions that you couldn’t help but wind your arms around him and pull him close to you. you could feel him relax in your embrace, something that nobody else could do no matter what. with your cheek pressed to his chest, you smiled to yourself as you felt him press a kiss to the crown of your head and his arms wrap tightly around you.

“since i went a little overboard with the flowers,” he mumbled, “do you think we should take them down to the hospital and give them out to the patients?”

there he was. your zayne. sweet, compassionate, loving zayne.

taglist; @chim-i @reialbert @circusclownsam @yegrnn @kreishin @xmikanx @frobin4ever @keitthen <3 & all the anons that requested this!

[woso-dreamzzz]

Homework

Barcelona Femení x Teen!Reader

Summary: You try to get someone else to do your homework

Studying was such a bore for you. You hated sitting in a classroom and studying. Lucy told you that you had a restless soul and that's why you would prefer to be out on the pitch rather than stuck inside.

Playing for Manchester City had been a perfect outlet and the call to play for Barcelona had been a dream come true.

It was just a shame that the schooling system still kept you shackled.

Taking online classes was better than physical school but it just meant that the actual studying and doing homework was left solely on you. Keira sometimes would allocate times for you to do it but Lucy would always stage what she would call a jailbreak and take you to the park or get a snack.

Either way, actually doing the work was something that you struggled with.

Which was, as you glanced around the break room, you had an empty word document and a sheet of questions of Spanish open in another tab.

Most of the team were either in meetings or getting food so it was just you and the younger members of the squad. Your eyes roved over them all, glancing back at your screen.

Esmee and Salma were playing each other on FIFA. Jana and Bruna were watching with rapt attention. But you found your target in Ona, who was throwing grapes into the air and trying to catch them in her mouth.

You slumped into the seat next to her, placing your laptop in her lap.

She raised a brow at you. "What is this?"

You gestured to the screen. "What does it look like?"

"Your homework?"

"Wow," You said sarcastically," Well done. It is my homework. Has anyone ever told you you're a genius?"

She rolled her eyes. "I meant, what is it doing here? On my lap?"

You sent her an award winning smile. "Do it for me?"

"Isn't that cheating?"

"It's not a test," You said," Just homework. Besides," You shrugged," It's been melting my mind. None of it makes sense. You'd just get through this so quickly."

She narrowed her eyes, easily seeing through your mediocre manipulation attempts. She glanced at your questions for a moment before she slapped some money into your hand.

"Get me a chocolate bar from the vending machine," She said," And an energy drink too..." She thought for a moment. "And you've got to be the one to ask Lucy and Keira if I can crash around your place tomorrow."

You almost groaned. You and Ona had been planning a movie marathon for weeks now but the tv at your place with Lucy and Keira was better than the one at her apartment so you had been trying to drop hints to Lucy and Keira about Ona staying over but neither had quite picked up on them.

"Fine," You said begrudgingly, standing up," A chocolate and an energy drink. Got it."

You slipped out of the room with little fanfare. If Ona managed to get your homework done quickly then the rest of your afternoon would be free to snack and muck around until Lucy and Keira came to take you home.

With the staff and the rest of the girls in meetings, the hallways were empty. You got to the vending machine with ease, punching in the code of Ona's favourite chocolate and energy drink. You've just fished them out when a shiver ran down your spine. A shadow fell over you.

You turned around slowly and was met with the face of your captain, dripping in disapproval.

"Nena," She said and your usual nickname struck fear into your heart," Aren't you supposed to be doing your homework?"

While Keira grew bored of making you study and do your homework, Alexia did not. Your very first day in Barcelona consisted of you walking into the locker room to see her standing by your cubby with the school schedule you had given over to the staff.

You were pretty sure that if you didn't already know Keira and Lucy from City then you would have ended up moving in with Alexia, if only so she could keep a close eye on your studies.

"I...er...Went to get some snacks?"

She raised a brow at you. "Really? Ona's favourite snacks? What were you meant to be studying today, your Spanish? If I go into the break room, will I find Ona doing your work for you?"

You didn't answer.

But that was answer enough.

Alexia sighed, one of those long drawn-out sighs that only ever really got used on you - and sometimes Mapi, when she was acting particularly like a kid.

"Sorry?"

"No, you are not." She took you by the shoulders, making you walk in front of her all the way back to where Ona was sitting, dutifully typing away at your homework. She cleared her throat.

Ona turned and immediately went pale. She looked at you. She looked at Alexia.

"She bullied me into it!"

"Liar!"

Alexia fixed you both with a stern look that you wilted under. "So, you're telling me a sixteen-year-old bullied you into doing homework, Ona?"

"Er...yes?"

"Go and do three laps."

"Alexia!"

"Do you want to make it four?"

Ona took off running and you shoved the drink and chocolate bar into her hands as she passed.

With her gone though, Alexia's ire was firmly back on you. She plucked your laptop up from the sofa and placed it on the table. You knew what she wanted so you went without fuss, slumping into the seat.

She made you watch as she deleted all of the work Ona had done for you.

"You're smart, nena," She said as she did it," You just do stupid things. Do I have to take you with me to my meetings now? To make sure you get your work done?"

You fought the urge to roll your eyes, not wanting an even longer lecture. You, however, didn't keep your feet out of your mouth because you replied," You hover enough. I don't need you watching my every move."

Alexia sent you a withering glare and you shrunk in your seat. You hastened to placate her and started typing. It seemed like you did understand what you're homework was telling you, the little break to get Ona's snacks must have given your brain the respite it needed.

Alexia slid into the seat next to you. She didn't do much - barely even checked her phone - but made sure to look over your shoulder as you wrote.

By the time, you've finished, it's time to break for lunch. Esmee and Salma had just left so you tried to catch up with them but the hand at the back of your collar stopped you in your tracks.

"You're coming home with me tonight," Alexia told you succinctly," I've still got clothes left over from when you last visited. You'll sit at the table and do that economics essay you've been putting off and, if you get it done without complaint, I'll check over what you just finished."

You made a face. "Is this your way of saying I completely flunked it?"

Alexia rolled her eyes and you knew by the way she tucked you under her arm, that she was no longer mad. "Focus on the positives, nena. If you're very good, we'll even order dinner to the house."

[sorchathered]

The Willows Never Stopped Weeping for You

Pairing-Tyler Owens x female OC (Olivia Wright)

Warnings- language, drinking, angst, death, injury, smut

Summary- Olivia let Tyler go to carry out his dreams, but broke his heart in the process. What happens when in the wreckage of a little small town he learns the real reason she left him, and how do they repair it?

A/N- we back at it again on the angst train, third week in a row lol!! I really loved this one, twisters was so good and I am excited to start writing for the fandom! As always, like, comment, reblog anything to let me know what you think!

“We’ve gotta get the hell out of dodge, we can’t sit here any longer Ty!” Dani is panicked, sweat dripping from their brow as they tremble, eyes wild and afraid of what will happen if they don’t make it out.

“I can’t- I can’t leave without her goddamnit and you know it, go ahead of me, you gotta trust me! We will make it out of here, get everyone to safety Dan, I’m serious get the hell out of here!” He yells over the roar of the wind, shoving them towards the rv and as much as it pains the crew, they know Tyler would die in this storm before he ever left Olivia behind. She was his everything, he’d loved her his whole life, and even if things were broken between them he would die a thousand times over to make sure she was safe.

——————————————————————

The crew had been up and down the state the past few weeks, working together with Javi and his crew to test out Kate’s theory and it had been one hell of a ride. They’d mostly been able to help keep the damage to a minimum, but as always with storms like these it was always a risk.

The little town on the outskirts of Enid had been ravaged more than once, but this storm seemed to be hell bent on taking whatever was left of the small community and turning it to rubble. So many injured, and so many homes and businesses destroyed, it seemed like a no-brainer that the government would send aid relief workers to help repair the damage, but what Tyler Owens hadn’t foreseen was the bright green eyes and auburn hair of his first love as he helped people in the aftermath.

Olivia Wright had been his everything since he was fourteen years old, occupied every one of his dirty fantasies and dreams of the future. He’d never been more sure of anyone in his life, until they’d crashed and burned so spectacularly shortly after college. He’d fallen in love with storm chasing, his dreams of working for the NWS had turned into something else entirely as he and the crew of misfits he migrated to became more and more obsessed with the beauty and danger these storms brought.

Liv had their whole future planned, finish college, get married. Ty would work for the NWS and she would become a nurse, fulfilling your passion to help people and getting to be by his side while he pursued his passion for meteorology. The two of them were growing apart, everyone could see it but him, and she knew she’d have to be the one to let go, he was always bigger than the whole sky and Liv couldn’t bear to keep him down. So she broke his heart and her own, and in that time she watched him flourish. His channel and all of his friends, the articles written about his discoveries, she watched it all with rapt attention, he was living out his dreams and Liv couldn’t have been more proud. Eventually she had to decide what was best for her, and watching storms ravage communities just like hers in Arkansas became too much to bear, working in disaster relief and helping to save lives became her passion, she kept her head down and let the work take over, but never lost hope that one day she’d run smack dab into that man that was as wild as the western wind.

It had happened less like a rom com and more like a horror movie, he’d seen her first and lost his cool immediately, ducking under an awning and scrambling to find somewhere, anywhere else to be but near her. Lily, who had been both of their friends in college couldn’t quite figure out what the hell was wrong with him, but it didn’t take long to spot her bright hair and the FEMA t-shirt Liv was sporting as she handed out water to a group not far from theirs.

“Oh my God is that my Livvy?!” She shrieked as she ran for her friend, the two of them erupting in giggles and swaying each other in the midst of the debris-covered road.

“Lily bug!! Oh my goodness what are y’all doing here?! I thought from your last video you guys were over near Lawton!” She said, smacking a hand over her mouth as she realized she’d given herself away already.

“Ooh so you have been watching hmm? Come say hi to everyone cutie pie, it’s been too long and we need to catch up.” She pulled her along but Liv tried to dig her heels in, wild green eyes panicked.

“I can’t intrude Lils, and I don’t want to make Tyler uncomfortable, I’m sure he doesn’t want to see me” she says as she puts both hands up in surrender but Lily is having none of it.

“Nope, you don’t get to pussy out Olivia, life is too short and you know it. Now come on! I want to hear all about your life, and Dani makes some bomb ass burritos so you should try to eat something, it’s gonna be a long day babygirl.

————————————————————-

He somehow manages to avoid her like the plague all day, catching glimpses here and there but mostly staying close to Kate and Javi, much to Lily's frustration if the glares she’s cut at him all afternoon are any indication.

Livvy wasn’t quite sure what to make of it; she had been watching them for so long online that she felt like she knew the crew personally, they were some of the kindest people she’d ever met and it wasn’t lost on her that all of them had been brought together by Ty. He’d made himself a family, it was just another thing that she had missed her chance on and she couldn’t help but feel a little emotional over it.

When Kate had come over to introduce herself later in the evening, it had been obvious to Olivia that she and Tyler had something going on. It was hard to dislike her, she was beautiful and kind, and smart as a whip from what Liv could tell. Definitely perfect for him, so after a while of watching them all interact and being all but ignored by her oldest friend, it got to be too much and she found a way to make her escape, using an early morning as an excuse and holing up in her motel room to lick her wounds and cry.

Lily chases after her with another nasty glare in Tyler’s direction, everyone had questions now and he couldn’t give them, waving them off with a middle finger as he stumbled through the parking lot, a little tipsy and feeling an ache in his chest that he’d thought he’d healed from.

“Liv! Stop damnit, I know this shit is hard but just talk to me honey, tell me.” Lily shouts into the crowded lot and watches her friend's shoulders sag as she turns with tears sliding down her cheeks.

“Oh Lily.” She lets out a ragged breath and lets it all wash over her, everything she’s left unsaid and held deep inside. “I could never deny him happiness, if it’s not with me that’s OK, it’s been a long time and I’ve learned to accept it. If Kate makes him happy then of course I want that for him. I never stopped loving him, so of course I would always want what’s best for him. It wasn’t right back then Lily, that kinda love was unpredictable. We were growing together like two gnarled trees, neither of us were helping the other reach our potential and I had to let him go so we didn’t end up hating each other. “ A shudder runs through her at the declaration, tears are threatening to seep from her eyes but she won’t give them the satisfaction.

“That sounds like horseshit and you know it” Lily says she jabs her finger into Liv’s shoulder, her eyes are full of fire. Liv knows she means well, she’s always been a good man in the storm, someone you want in your corner when things get hard which is why she’s so glad that Tyler has her. Liv lets her shoulders sag and look at Lily full of defeat.

“I can’t change it now, even if I wish I could.”

“Do you wish you could?” She says with raised eyebrow and Olivia gives her a little nod.

“Every day. I miss him every day.” Tears well up in her eyes and she shivers as the wind blows through the camp, but she won’t let the pain overtake her, she made her choice and she can only hope that he’ll be happy.

Olivia doesn’t see it but Lily does, Tyler is half hidden behind the RV, he’s heard it all and she watches as his face goes from grief stricken to angry turning on his heel as he walks off into the dark, the weight of her confession breaking his heart all over again.

—————————————————

He paces the concrete hallway of the motel for what feels like hours, letting the weight of what she said run over him. Had he really been so blind? Olivia hadn’t wanted to let him go, and he’d never thought to question it when she pushed him away. He had been hurt and stubborn, shutting down immediately and saying some of the meanest things he could hurl at her to hurt her back. In hindsight he should have known she was just trying to give him the ability to do what he wanted, but just the fact that she had convinced herself that she was what was holding him back made a fire rage in him. Sure it would have been hard to manage, but they could’ve handled it! They could handle anything together, he’d always told her that, why she would have ever thought otherwise was something he couldn’t reconcile with.

He was at her door before he could stop himself, rapping sharply on the peeling metal and praying that she would listen. The sounds of the lock being undone told him she was still awake, the door swinging open to reveal her puffy tear stained face, hair up in a messy knot on her head and an oversized t shirt full of holes, one that had definitely belonged to him.

“Why are you here Ty? You’d had all day to say something to me, and you waited until midnight?” She said with a sniffle, there was no point in trying to hide what she’d been doing, it was all over her face and his heart clenched in his chest knowing he’d hurt her again.

“You didn’t want us to end, did you?” He said gruffly, he wasn’t leaving until he got his answers, he needed to know the truth.

“What does it matter now? You’re with Kate-“ she said as more tears formed, arms wrapped tightly around her waist as though she was trying to hold herself together.

“I’m not. We tried it, but she’s got her own demons to work out, and we agreed it would be better to be friends. Answer my question baby, I need to hear it. Do you still want me?” He was leaning in close to the door frame now, close enough to feel the heat radiating from his body and smell the beer on his breath. Liv let out a ragged breath and nodded, that was all he needed to push the door the rest of the way open and pull her into his arms, kicking the door shut behind him as he pressed kisses to her cheek and neck while she held on for dear life. Sobs wracked her body as he sat down on the creeky mattress, pulling her into his lap as he rocked her side to side.

“My sweet girl” he murmured into her hair, he let her cry it all out until she relaxed in his grip, tipping her chin up to look at him as he stroked her cheek.

“I never stopped hoping for this, I didn’t want to hold you back but- I can’t stay away anymore. I-I love you Ty, I always will.” She stuttered and he let out a groan as he pressed his mouth to hers, flipping them both so she was on her back and spread out for him, she’d been the star of every fantasy he’d ever had, and nothing would ever be as good as the real thing.

“I never stopped either Livvy girl, can I have you? Please baby I- I need it, need to show you how much I missed you.” He looks wrecked, hair a mess and eyes wild, and she can’t stop herself from pulling him down to her, licking into his mouth and running her hands over his broad shoulders, watching him shiver in her embrace as he grinds down into her.

They make up for all the time lost, re-learning each other's bodies until the early morning, finally coming up for air when Tyler’s phone begins to go off with weather alerts and texts from Boone.

“Looks like there’s another cell coming this way, we need to get these people to safety while we can.” He says with a sigh as he rolls his body off of hers, she’s sated and happy as she stretches her limbs like a cat and moans, he feels himself twitch in his boxers as he watches her. She’s like a siren, calling him back to her and he wants nothing more to than to stay right here between the sheets and ravage her again.

“Stop looking at me like that Owens, or we’ll never get out of here in time” she playfully punches his chest and he lets out a hearty laugh, they’d have plenty of time to talk and catch up, he wouldn’t be letting her out of his sight anytime soon.

“Ok, ok sugar, let’s get back out here, storms a comin’ and times a wastin’.”

——————————————————————-

He should have known. He should have known they’d never get that lucky, especially knowing how unpredictable the storms had been this season.

They thought they’d had more time, weather warnings saying the tornado would likely just pass the town, but it had all gone wrong. What had started out as one had turned into two, splitting off and causing maximum damage to what was left of the area. He’d lost Liv and Boone somewhere along the way, Kate and Javi and the rest of the crew were safely out of danger, but somehow the twister had gotten between his truck and yours, and when the dust had settled you and Boone were nowhere to be found.

He was sick, bile crawling up his throat as he trembled, they’d been searching the perimeter when he’d heard Boone screaming for help, tearing through the field of corn to find your upturned truck, mangled and covered in broken glass. Boone had tried his best to pull you from the wreckage, but his shoulder was mangled; most likely dislocated from the crude angle it hung from.

Tyler pulled Olivia’s limp body out and heard a sharp gasp from her, she was alive, that was good. At least that was what he thought until he got her in his arms and saw the jagged shrapnel wedged in her abdomen, blood flowing like a water hose from the wound, way too much to be a minor wound. She kept lolling her head back and forth as she tried to lift her hand to his face, god there was blood everywhere, he couldn’t take the metal out, what if that made it worse? He yelled for Boone to give him his shirt, tears pouring from his eyes as he tried to stop the bleeding, but it just wouldn’t stop coming.

“Livvy, baby look at me ok?” He says with a gentle pat to her cheek, her eyes keep rolling around in her head as she tries to focus on something, anything, but she just can’t seem to get there.

Finally she seems to see him through her unfocused bloodshot eyes, a small victory and he breathes for the first time since he found her.

“Oh god, Ty there’s so much blood! What happened? Are- are you ok? How do we stop it? We need help!” She cries out as her body shakes in his arms, she’s going into shock and bleeding to death but is still selfless to the end, always worried about everyone but herself.

He’s sobbing so hard now he can hardly speak, just kissing whatever skin he can get to as he holds her tightly, still pressing hard into the gaping wound despite knowing it won’t do anything to stop the inevitable. He’s going to lose her, and he just got her back.

A scream comes from somewhere, Tyler jolting awake from the world’s most uncomfortable hospital chair. He’s drenched in sweat, and his neck aches, as he looks around the dimly lit room he realizes the scream came from him. He’s replayed that awful night over and over for the past three days, it ends with Olivia choking on her own blood as she fades away and he can’t seem to make his brain understand that while it definitely happened that way, the end result wasn’t quite so gruesome. She’s alive, unconscious, but alive. How EMS found them in time will consume his thoughts for a good long while. He’d been so sure he’d lost her but the miracles just kept coming because somehow the doctors were able to save her and had assured him that though recovery would be long and hard she would in fact recover.

—————————————————————

Months later he would still be convinced it was all just a dream, the nightmares had ceased but the jagged scar along Olivia’s sternum would always be there to remind him of how close he’d come to losing it all.

He lived for chasing storms, he’d convinced himself it was everything he’d ever need after she’d left, but he’d been so wrong.

She’d never ask him to give it up, but he didn’t know if he could continue to run after something that had nearly taken everything from him. He and Kate took a job consulting with the NWS on her research after Ben’s article got traction, and he left his truck to Boone to continue the legacy and the channel. He wanted to prevent the storms from happening before they started and he knew with Kate’s research and the grants from the government they could really dig in and make a difference.

He asked her to marry him on her birthday, 6 months after the accident and she’d said yes before he could even finish his speech. The future hadn’t been linear like he thought, he didn’t have to accept what he thought he deserved and finally allowed himself to accept what he wanted. Olivia Wright Owens sounded damn good to him, and maybe one day a house full of babies. Yeah he could definitely make that his new dream.

Tagging- @sailor-aviator @goldenseresinretriever @hangmanapologist @roosterforme @trickphotography2 @mynameismckenziemae @seitmai @sebsxphia @im-just-ken @kmc1989 @jessicab1991 @dizzybee03 @nouis-bum @attapullman @bobgasm @floydsglasses @withahappyrefrain

[goldenhickeysandramen]

Evolution of their narrative

I admit it. I also get confused as to what kind of couple Tae& Koo is supposed to be to their shippers.

When I first joined the fandom they were the “hidden couple”, and jikook was “fan service”, cause is what the masses demanded from BH/Bang PD.

It didn't take me long to realise that the "masses" in this fandom are actually the taek00kers (humaluvre is bigger than the majority of the most famous JK's focus accs) … So I've never really understood who the masses-asking-massively-for-"jikook"-content were 🤷‍♀️

Then, I read them that the big proof that taek00k was real was, precisely, that they couldn’t do all the things that jikook could do so well (you know, travel together only the two of them, stare at each other in rapt attention, sucking ears and necks, treat each other as a married couple, support each other to the fullest, holding hands whenever they have the opportunity…). The reason of them not doing all of these things was South Korea, since it is an homophobic country.

That’s why the company edited the content and didn't let them interact. It was all cuts and so on. Everything they did was private, and that's why there was no evidence, other than some witnesses of people with telescopic sight and facial recognition (maybe they were androids?)

I had more or less understood the narrative, until the LOVEGRAM era started, and that's when it all blew over!

Their insta accounts were no longer professional accounts (like twitter or weverse), but personal… and from then on, their selfies were some short of engagement pics or couple confirmation and their funny comments about boxing hooks were actually whipped messages of love.

Btw it seems South Korea was no longer homophobic at that time.

INSTAGRAM WAS THE LAW

When JK closed his Instagram account (forced by the company 😌) we were already in chapter 2. The lovegram didn't matter anymore…because Jungkook hanging out sometimes with Tae and wooga became the confirmation of what Instagram -in reality- failed to confirm. Never mind that their hanging out concentrated during some months when they both had more free time or that they actually just did what good friends do: having fun at the movies, bowling or skiing together with other friends… but hey, those tiny details don't matter in the great love story that is told.

And from there we move on to the part where the CHAOS really started, when the COMPANION SYSTEM news dropped

And guess what? Korea became homophobic again

Some said that they were forced to part ways (the company, the government, themselves because they wouldn't last a second without f?….). Gays dont enlist together they said.

Another line of argument was that Jimin had asked JK to enlist with him… I guess because he was going to be terrible at the military. LOL

But we all can sense that the most extended opinion was "I can't understand this plot twist for shit".

(Maybe the problem is they never understood their favs but that’s for another post)

And in the midst of CHAOS it was no longer possible to think of a new narrative...that's why the strategy became "attack". If they can't prove that their favourites are a couple, they'll go and debunk the rest.

At this point they don’t seem to care if ta3k00k is real or not… they simply choose not to surrender and ignore some facts. If they freaking ignored Jennie during a year, they will do the same with jikook being glued for 18 months.

So in the next months, we'll probably see part of fandom (solos and tkkers) attacking jikookers, and another part trying to ignore us. I fear the chaos will continue… pretty sure some toxic ones will watch the travel show just to diss jikook..

But we shouldn’t care too much because as we have seen, Jimin and Jungkook will never stop taking their decisions and behaving with authenticity

The boys have chosen their own path this year, not to please the majority of their fandom (jikookers are not the mass), but because they wanted to.

At the end of the day, they care about their fans, but we don’t own their lifes and they have shown us. And I applaud 👏 them

And yes, maybe their country and the careers they have chosen dont allow them to be fully free…. but they dont prevent them to stay one next to the other. They know how to choose the battles worth fighting for.

Don't you think it's beautiful and says a lot about the quality of love and respect that Jimin and Jungkook have for each other?

I think so

"standing in the fire next to you"

💜💛

[lipglossanon]

Guess Who?

Puppy!Leon S. Kennedy x fem!reader (Valentine’s One Shot)

Warnings: 18+ MDNI, hybrid au, Leon POV, soft boy Leon 🥺, slight dirty talk, kissing, unprotected sex, creampie, knotting, slight breeding kink

Barely looked over ✌️ lol

title from Guess Who? by BB King

Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone!! 💜 this is me dropping a card in your decorated box to say I think you’re cute 😘

He notices all the sweet smelling candies and flowers on your last trip to the grocery store, but it didn’t really click that it was for the holiday coming up until your friend dropped off a silly card. 

Resting his head over your shoulder, he reads whatever made you laugh hard enough to draw his attention. You hum and reach back to scratch him behind the ears.

“What’s that?” He asks, pressing against you more firmly as his tail wags. 

“Ah, just a silly Valentine from Claire. She’ll be out with Rebecca and Jill later and stopped by to invite me along,” you move your hand to tuck the cardstock back into its envelope. 

“Oh,” he steps away, tail pausing mid-wag as he realizes he didn’t even get you anything and you’re going out!?

Turning, you give him an easy smile, “Don’t worry, I told her I already had plans. We’re going to watch movies tonight, right?”

He grins and wraps you up in a hug, “Uh huh. And you promised popcorn.”

Laughing, you ruffle his ears before cutting yourself off with a swear. 

“Dammit, that’s what I forgot to get,” you sigh and rub the bridge of your nose, “let me run to the store and grab some and when I get back we’ll cuddle on the couch.”

Leon nods quickly and follows on your heels as you walk to the entryway and slip on your shoes. You give him a quick kiss on the cheek before closing the front door and locking it. As soon as the lock clicks, Leon takes off to his room. He digs through his wardrobe and under the bed before completely demolishing his closet. 

Although he may have not gotten you something for Valentine’s per se, he did have something he’d been meaning to give you but always slips his mind. He found a pretty lavender bracelet that reminded him of you during one of the last farmer’s market expedition ( he knows it’s mainly an excursion in socializing him with strangers, but that’s neither here nor there). 

It’s cute and he thinks you’ll like it. Plus, he attached the very first tag you ever gave him onto it as well (just seeing his name engraved in simple cursive makes his tail wag). Spinning in place, he turns back to look over his destroyed room. Ignoring the complete mess he’s made, he roots around until he finds a piece of crumpled paper and a couple of pens. His ear cocks back and he turns his head to listen— the crunch of gravel signals your car pulling back up the house. 

Now on borrowed time, Leon turns the paper longways so he can quickly write out his message and encircle it with a heart. Tossing the pens into the mess on top of his dresser, he grabs the bracelet and beelines it straight to the kitchen. It’ll be the first place you head into after entering the house; making sure to set out the paper where you’ll see it, he sets the bracelet on top. Then, he ducks back around the doorframe on the opposite end so you won’t see him.

“Leon!” You call out as you open the front door. 

He makes himself stay put as you call for him again before shutting the front door. Listening with rapt attention, he holds his breath as you walk into the kitchen, setting the popcorn down as you notice his note. He watches as your fingers graze the paper, a big smile spreading across your face. Picking up the bracelet you slide it on your wrist and twist it back and forth to admire it before turning back to the paper. 

“You like it?” His voice comes out small as you jump and turn to face him. 

“I love it, Leon. You’re such a sweet boy,” you coo, holding out your arms for a hug. 

He chuffs happily and wraps you up into a bear hug, smothering your laugh into his chest. His rough tongue licks across your ear and jaw before he finally finds your smiling lips, kissing you messily while your hands grip onto his shoulders. Before he lets himself get carried away, he pulls back, dropping one last kiss on your cheek. 

“You wanna start the movie while I get the snacks ready?” You murmur, hands lightly petting the nape of his neck and making him shiver.

He stiffens against your thigh, cock filling out as his eyes dilate. 

“Miss owner,” he whines softly and you laugh. 

“Go on, we’ll snuggle up on the couch,” you kiss the vampire bite of freckles on his neck and pull away from his body heat. 

With a dazed pout, he makes his way back into the living room and dramatically collapses onto the couch. Even if you’re not there to see it, it’s the principle of the matter. After a few minutes, he smells a buttery aroma at the same time his ears pick up the sound of kernels popping. It’s not too long before you walk into the living room carrying drinks and a big bowl of popcorn. 

He helps you set the drinks down as you sit next to him. Once settled in, you flip through your watchlist and settle on a romcom you’ve been promising to watch with Leon since last week. He watches you out of the corner of his eye while he picks at the salty snack you’re holding in your lap. Halfway through the movie, you shift the empty bowl onto the coffee table and pause the movie to go wash your hands. 

Leon stretches his legs out until they’re tucked under the table, slumping into the couch cushions lazily as he waits for you. Coming  back into the room, you smile at his relaxed demeanor and sit back down next to him. 

You curl up into his side, head resting against his neck as one hand pets his ears slowly. His tail half wraps around your waist and shifts when you sigh against his skin. Your lips drop soft kisses up to his jaw and he tilts his head to meet the next one with a groan. He loves licking into your mouth; it feels so dirty and good. You moan against the muscle as he runs it across your gums and tongue. 

“Miss owner, please,” he pants out while you kiss back down his neck. 

“C’mon be a good boy and just watch the movie,” you tease, nipping at his jawline, “you’ve been bugging me to put it on for ages.”

He huffs, head lolling against the back of the couch as you press closer into his side, one hand delving under his shirt to tease across his nipples. Leon rocks his hips, cock tenting the joggers obscenely as your fingers feather over his sensitive buds. You pinch one gently and he groans, precum blurting from his tip and wetting his sweats. 

“So cute,” you nuzzle his collar bone, “wanna pull it out for me?”

“Yess,” he hisses under his breath, hands fumbling with the band until he’s able to push the loungewear down to pool at his calves. 

He hears you inhale as his dick bobs, flushed and thick, dripping precum all down his shaft. 

“Please, touch me,” he whispers against your temple, eyes fluttering shut when he feels your hand grip him softly. 

“S’good,” his tail thumps as your hand slowly strokes his dick from tip to base and back up, squeezing the head in your fist. 

Letting go, he whines and paws at your hips as you stand up. You shush him as you shuffle your own sweats and underwear off before straddling him. Sandwiching his cock against your cunt, the fat tip parts your slit until his cock notches against your drippy hole. His hands grip the fat of your ass as you sink down inch by torturous inch until you’re fully seated in his lap, dick being squeezed by your pussy walls.

“Miss owner, s’all wet ‘n soft inside,” Leon bares his teeth before whining as you tug on his ears, “pussy’s so good, so perfect.”

“Leon,” you gasp, knees digging into the couch next to him as you raise up to drop back down, letting gravity drive his cock up into your soaked cunt. 

“Such a good boy,” your voice drips like honey from your lips and his hips rock up, humping your pussy as pleasure shoots through his body. 

“Yeah?” A high reedy moan sticks in his throat, “I’m a good boy?”

“Oh the best, Leon, the best boy,” you gasp, eyes drooping when his cock grinds against the front of your cunt, rubbing across the spongy spot that makes you clamp down on him tighter. 

“So sweet,” you lean forward, arms bracing your body on the back of the couch, “so sweet to me, w’nna show you much I appreciate it.”

He grunts, the new angle letting him thrust up harder into your pussy, the loud wet sounds of his cock pistoning in and out of your cunt echoing in your living room. 

“My sweet pup,” you murmur against his lips and he can’t take anymore. 

Leon yanks you close and stands up to splay you out, back pressed down on the couch, with him buried between your thighs. His hips rabbit against yours, pelvis smacking your clit making you squeal and claw at his chest. With a huff, his rough tongue rasps across your panting mouth, tongue delving between your lips. You moan as spit fills your mouth while Leon fucks your cunt rough and deep. 

“Gonna cum, Leon,” you finally pull your head back enough to moan. 

“Already?” He bites your bottom lip and sucks it into his mouth before letting go with a pop. 

“Want my knot, pretty owner? Want me to give you my pups?”

You thrash underneath him, pussy clenching and pulsing around his cock at his words. 

“Please, Leon,” you wrap your legs around his waist, “knot me, wanna feel my good boy fill me up.”

“Fuck,” he growls, chest rumbling with the sound. 

He reaches between you and thumbs across your clit in slow firm circles. His dick feels like it’s in a vice as you bear down on him, back bowing with pleasure. 

“Leon, oh god,” you choke out a loud cry and press your head into the couch cushions, tears beading your waterline. 

He watches you fall apart while feeling your pussy squeeze and milk his cock, pressing himself deep until his knot sinks inside and locks him into your spasming hole. 

“So good little owner,” he sighs happily, tail wagging behind him while he pumps your tight cunt with load after load of sticky cum. 

You giggle, high on endorphins, and run your hands through his hair, eyes tracking his bracelet, “I love the gift, Leon.”

“Mmm, happy you do,” he kisses you on the cheek, nose snuffling against your skin, “Happy Valentine’s.”

“Happy Valentine’s, Leon.”

divider: saradika

[togrowoldinv]

Booked

Florence Pugh x Reader

You meet Florence at a bookstore event and spend a whirlwind evening with her

Note: I just love Florence and bookstores so here’s this. Enjoy!

Florence Pugh Masterlist, Main Masterlist

You knew it was going to be a good day when you woke up the morning. The sun was shining for the first time in days and you had plans to attend an event at your favorite bookstore.

When you got to the bookstore, you settled in with your favorite fall drink and a wave to the employees that you know well. You listened with rapt attention to the author as she spoke about her new book.

You paid so much attention to her that you didn’t notice the woman sitting two seats from you. She couldn’t keep her eyes off of you. In fact, she was having a hard time doing anything but smiling at the way your face was contorting in thought.

After the discussion, the crowd began mingling and refreshments were served.

You are drinking a glass of champagne when she approaches you. You know who she is, but you feel like pinching yourself to make sure she’s real.

“Hello,” her sweet voice falls from her lips. “I couldn’t help but be absolutely enamored by you.”

You’re sure she can tell you’re flustered by her words. You don’t know what to say.

“What are you drinking there?” She asks.

“Oh, um- champagne?” You phrase it as a question. She chuckles.

“May I?” She gestures to your glass.

You hand her the glass and her fingers brush against yours. The feeling is cosmic. You watch as she drinks a sip of the champagne. You probably spend too long watching her throat as she swallows the liquid.

Looking away when she catches you staring, you grab the nearest book and pretend to look through it.

“I’m Florence,” she finally says.

Her hand goes to shake yours. In an act of politeness, you reach for her hand quickly. But in the process you drop the book.

“Oh, sorry sorry,” you ramble as you bend down to pick up the book.

You look up before you stand back up. Florence looks down at you from her standing position. All you see is her hands gripping the glass and her alluring chest. You stand up again.

“Good choice,” Florence says. She takes the book from your hand.

“So, you’ve read it?”

“Little Women? Do you not know who I am?”

“Oh, I know,” you say quietly. “I just didn’t know you would read a book for the movie.”

“I’m always prepared,” Florence says. “What’s your name, darling?”

The term of affection makes your heart jump. What had she meant earlier when she said she was enamored by you?

“I’m y/n,” you tell her.

“Y/n,” Florence says. You love the way it sounds with her accent. “Tell me, what’s your favorite book?”

You tell Florence your favorite book and walk her around the store to show her more. Her attention is completely on you. You can sense she’s the type of person that makes everyone feel like they are the most important person in the room.

It’s hours later when you realize that at some point you got comfortable with telling Florence pretty much everything. Maybe it is the champagne. Maybe it is the way she looks at you.

“Y/n, we’re closing soon,” the owner addresses you. You and Florence had found a comfortable seat in the children’s reading area.

“Thank you ma’am. We’ll be on our way,” you say.

“Hello,” Florence introduces herself to her. “I’m Florence. I love this place so much. Thank you for keeping books alive in this world.”

The owner smiles at her words and thanks her fervently. Even before she finds out that Florence donated thousands of dollars to the store tonight. She leaves you with Florence.

“So, I guess I better be going,” Florence says. “Thank you for an amazing evening, y/n.”

You stand and walk her to the exit. Outside, you keep pondering how to spend more time with this woman. You are falling for her.

“Hey, do you want to get some ice cream or something?” You ask. Florence chuckles and you rethink your words. “Or something else or nothing, I just don’t want this night to end.”

“I’d love to get ice cream,” Florence replies. “I know just the place.”

You wonder how she knows an ice cream place in this part of town, but you go along with it. She takes you to a sweet little hidden spot where they seem to know her.

Florence refuses to let you pay for the ice cream and you settle into a booth opposite of each other.

“So, what’s it like?” You ask her.

“What’s what like?”

“Being you,” you answer. “Being Florence Pugh.”

Florence thinks for a moment before she answers with a glorious smile.

“I’m just me. I’m the same Florence I’ve always been,” she says. “The media fucking sucks, but I’m still me.”

You nod along, appreciating her candor.

“What’s it like being you?” She challenges. You laugh.

“Some anxiety, some shyness, but mostly I think I’m alright,” you joke.

“I think you’re amazing,” Florence says. She reached across the table and puts her hand over yours.

The ice cream order is ready soon. You walk to the counter to get it before spending another few hours talking to Florence and enjoying the treat.

You still feel the longing to see her for more time. Florence takes your hand as you stand up to leave the ice cream shop. Her hand fits perfectly in yours.

She stops short of getting into her car and turns back to you.

“Y/n, forgive me if I’m being too forward,” Florence begins. “But would you want to go out on a date with me?”

“I would love to,” you say quickly, not even pretending to care you said it too fast.

Florence chuckles her glorious laugh and hands you her phone to put your number in. You do so and she sends you a message with her name and a heart next to it.

“I look forward to seeing you again, y/n,” Florence says. She steps closer to you. You take a deep breath.

“You too, Florence,” you say.

Neither of you know exactly what to do next, but Florence takes the lead. She leans in and hugs you tightly. You feel like you’re at home in her arms.

Florence pulls away just slightly and gazed into your eyes. It’s like every romantic comedy movie. So cheesy but so perfect as she leans in and kisses your lips softly.

“I’m so glad I came to the bookstore today,” you mumble when the kiss is paused for air.

“I’m so grateful you did,” Florence says.

She kisses you again and a few more times before you finally say goodnight. Before you get home, she’s already texted you to ask if she can see you again soon.

Who needs cheesy romance novels when you’ve got the perfect girl in your sights now? It was the perfect day.

[noxemma]

Chapter 6 for my Hot Summer Art challenge fic

It's not a vacation without some relaxation. The group comes back to the house for late night movie night to relax after the case.

Tags, Rating, Word Count, AO3 link, etc. at the bottom

Beside Your Side

Fic Summary: Dean convinces Sam to look into a potential case where people are going missing from a New Jersey beach town. Of course, they have to bring Cas and Eileen along, just in case it's not a monster. Dean is excited to get the case over quickly and enjoy a well-earned vacation with the people he loves the most. Nothing ever seems to go the way Dean plans it though, and this case is no exception.

Chapter 6: Ready for Relaxation

Cas

"Cas, I-"

“Are you guys going to stay out here all night or are you going to come in and join movie night?” Sam demands, cutting off whatever Dean had been about to say.

“Dude, what is wrong with you? I know I raised you better than this,” Dean sighs in defeat leaving Cas like he's been all night, utterly confused. “Yeah, we’re coming.”

Dean holds the door and gestures for him to go in first, but he hesitates, curious as to what Dean had been about to say before Sam had interrupted.

“Don’t worry about it, like you said, we’ll have plenty of time to talk.”

Despite Dean acting normal as he and Sam make popcorn and grab beers for everyone, Cas can’t help but feel like something has changed and he doesn’t know how or why. He tries to shake it off though as everyone else appears to be enjoying the chaos.

“What’re we watchin’?” Dean shouts, mouthful of popcorn, swiping the remote off the side table.

“My vote is for Fellowship,” Eileen declares, claiming a seat on the couch before taking a sip of beer.

“Hell yeah!” Dean enthusiastically agrees before going still with mock seriousness. “Theatrical version or extended edition? Choose carefully, Eileen, this may just make for break our friendship.”

“You’d have to pry the extended edition from my cold, dead hands before you could get me to watch the theatrical version,” Eileen responds with equal solemnity.

They stare at each other, stone-faced for a few more seconds before they both burst out laughing.

“Sam, I want you to know, if you two ever break up, I’m taking Eileen’s side. She’s obviously your better half and she has the correct opinion of the theatrical version."

“Dude, that was one time! And I never said I didn’t like it or that it wasn’t the better version, but we’d been up for thirty plus hours and-“

“Excuses, excuses,” Elieen calls over Sam’s continued attempts to reason with the two of them. He finally gives in and takes his place to watch the movie.

Sam and Eileen end up nestled together on the couch, Cas sits in one of the armchairs, and Dean sits on the floor, propped up on the pillow Sam had eventually thrown down for him.

The movie starts.

Cas watches diligently, enjoying Dean’s comments and easy smiles more than the actual film, at least for the first portion of the movie. While watching parties and wizards talking hadn’t really held his attention, he finds himself watching with rapt attention as the fellowship is formed and the party begins losing members and facing dangers as they travel.

“Whaddya think so far, Cas?” Dean leans down to ask him, handing him another beer.

“I know the general premise, but I wasn’t sure if I liked it at first,” Cas starts, rolling his eyes when Dean places a hand to his ‘wounded’ heart, “but I find myself enjoying it more now it's not just a lot of walking.”

“And who’s your favorite character?” Dean asks, but he’s looking over his shoulder.

“They all have interesting nuances and flaws but I have to say that Aragorn is my favorite,” Cas says after thinking for a moment.

Eileen and Dean share look before bursting out laughing again, bringing themselves to tears.

“What? Dean, I don’t’ understand. What’s so humorous about that?” He looks to Sam for explanation, but he just shakes his head.

“I knew you were going to be an Aragorn fan,” Dean wheezes when he finally stops laughing, “nothing wrong with it. It means you’ve got good taste, Cas. He’s one of my favorites too.”

 “Hey Dean,” Sam barks, suddenly siting up on the couch. “Why is it that you always complain about my hair, but you don’t complain about Aragorn’s or Legolas’s?”

 “Well, first off because it's high fantasy not the real world, Sammy. They don’t need to really worry about a werewolf or a ghoul or something yanking them by the hair or having it get in their eyes while fighting.  Legolas I would complain about more, except that he wears it tied up in a way that kinda makes sense.”

“Ooh! Sam, I could try braiding your hair for a hunt,” Eileen joins in on the ribbing.

“No!”  Sam yelps with a hint of fear, causing Dean to go through another bout of giggling. He waits for them to regain control before challenging Dean, “And what about Aragorn? His hair is usually down.”

Dean crosses his arms defensively before shrugging in a lackluster attempt to remain unflustered. “It’s Viggo Mortensen. I’m not gonna complain about him, just like I’ll never complain about Dr. Sexy. Now can we get back to the movie; We’re missing good stuff.”

“You’re ridiculous,” Sam chortles and Cas gets the feeling he means more than Dean getting upset for an interruption Sam caused.

They continue watching the movie. Cas with great interest as Metatron's information dump could never have quite lived up to the nuanced characters, the moving music, and the breathtaking views.

They’re about three-quarters of the way through the film when, after yawning and nodding off for at least ten minutes, Eileen and Sam excuse themselves to go to bed. Dean pauses while they say their goodnights.

“Goodnight. See you both in the morning,” Eileen murmurs, giving Cas a pat on the shoulder and waving at Dean before heading up the stairs.

“Beach day tomorrow,” Sam says stifling a yawn, excited despite his apparent exhaustion. “Still weird to think we’re actually going to be on vacation.”

“Yeah, it’s long overdue,” Dean agrees.

Sam smiles and heads for the stairs to follow Eileen. He makes it up a few before he steps back down and call softly, “Hey, do you guys mind if Eileen and I go out for breakfast? I think it might be a nice surprise for her.”

“Go for it! She deserves a nice date.”

Sam ducks his head but can’t hide the beaming smile as he continues up to their room.

“Gah, he gives me a toothache when he’s sweet like that,” Dean grins at Cas who smiles in agreement. “You wanna take their spots on the couch?”

Cas takes a moment, not sure if he should trust himself to be in such close proximity to Dean, but the way Dean’s smile falters a hair at the hesitation ultimately makes his decision. He forces himself to move from the armchair to sink into the couch next to Dean who somehow made if from the floor to the couch faster. Cas makes sure to situate himself carefully toward the outside edge of the sofa so as not to crowd Dean and Dean does the same, apparently having a similar idea to Cas.

He hits play and Cas is sucked back into Middle Earth. He’s so absorbed in the craftsmanship of the storytelling that he doesn’t realize how close he’s gotten to Dean. Somehow, they’ve both shifted until their legs and shoulders are pressed together, until Dean is able to turn his head slightly to whisper into his ear.

“So, Viggo Mortensen actually broke his foot when they were filming him kicking the helmet after thinking Merry and Pippin are dead. That’s why his scream sounds so good, they decided to keep that take for the final cut.”

Cas stares at him, once again reminded why he loves the man so much. He loves that Dean wants to share his favorite movies, wants to know which characters Cas likes, wants to whisper pointless trivia because he thinks Cas might appreciate it. He misses the next few scenes just watching Dean happily consume media he’s probably seen several times. 

I wish we could do this all the time. Sit close to each other and watch movies, go to bars and grab drinks, just enjoy each other’s company, Cas thinks, his insides turned back into gooey, molten happiness.

He sighs and leans his head back against the sofa, so content that he nods his agreement when Dean silently asks him if they should start the next one.

Not even twenty minutes in though, he finds himself yawning frequently and his eyes getting heavy and tired, despite having slept most of the day away with Dean.

I’ll be sleeping with Dean again tonight. The thought momentarily distracts him from both the movie and his weariness as the memory of Dean leaning over him breaks loose from the box he’s forced it into. He closes his eyes and tries to keep his breath even against the phantom sensation of Dean’s erection pressing into his leg. It was nothing. Just a normal reaction to sleeping practically on top of another person.

Eyes still closed, Cas vows to keep to his side of the bed tonight. To not give Dean a reason to avoid his gaze or act awkwardly; to not give himself haunting visions of the man he can’t have.

“Cas? You asleep?” Dean whispers in the silence, apparently having paused the movie at some point.

“Yes? I mean no. Sorry, I was just resting my eyes for a minute,” he responds, his body feeling too heavy to move, even with the promise of laying down again with Dean.

“We can stop if you want, finish the rest tomorrow night?”

Dean

Cas takes a long time to respond, and Dean has a moment where he thinks he might have to carry the angel to the bed. The idea is not wholly unappealing, but he’d rather Cas get into the bed of his own volition, just to reassure Dean that he actually wants to be there.

“No, I’m good, really. We can keep watching for a few more minutes.”

Dean’s skeptical but lets the angel have his way, playing the movie again. It only takes a few minutes for him to feel Cas’ head fall to his shoulder for a short while before jerking back up again. He wants to tell Cas that he can leave it there, that he’s more than welcome to rest on him, but he keeps quiet, hoping if he doesn’t bring attention to it that Cas might let himself do it again.

His patience pays off and the comfortable weight of Cas’ head is back, hair tickling his bare neck a little. He lets Cas stay like that for far longer than he should, enjoying the way the man is tucked into his side too much to do anything. Eventually, his conscience gets the better of him and he pauses the movie one final time. He rewinds twenty minutes, so Cas doesn’t feel too bad, then taps his shoulder lightly with his opposite hand until he feels the angel stir.

“Cas? Cas sweetheart, it's time for bed.” The endearment slips out so quickly that all Dean can do is suck in a breath and hope that Cas doesn’t notice.

“’s the movie over?” Cas asks groggily.

“No, but I paused it. We’ll finish it later.”

“But I like it here.” It’s the closest Dean has heard the angel get to a whine, but he doesn’t have time to find amusement in that fact because Cas is nuzzling closer, nose and lips brushing up against his skin.

“I like you here too, Cas,” Dean says bravely, taking a half-step toward telling Cas he loves him, “But take it from me, the sofa might seem comfortable right now, but you’re back will be cursing you tomorrow.”

Like what you read? You can find the whole fic here on AO3

Rating: Explicit

Chapters: 6/? (hopefully 9 😂)

Chapter Word Count: ~4,100

Tags: Creator Chose Not to Use Archive Warnings, Castiel/Dean Winchester, Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester, Case Fic, Established Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester, Beach Case, Cannon when convenient, Mutual Pining, Idiots in Love, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con (Dean and background characters), Non-Consensual Touching (Not between Dean and Cas), Hurt/Comfort, I promise it's not as dark as it sounds, Fluff, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Smut, clueless Sam Winchester, Chick-Flick Moments, Cannon typical misunderstandings, Angst?, One day I'll learn how to tag, WIP, JackieDeeArt's Hot Summer Art 2024 (Supernatural), Hot Summer Art, Greek Mythology if you Squint, No Beta, Everyone is bad with words, Except Eileen who is the only emotionally stable person for miles, Dean Winchester Loves Castiel, Castiel Loves Dean Winchester, Angel Grace Dysfunction, Poor Coping Mechanisms, There was only one bed

[novamariestark]

Hi there you ❤️

I went through your prompt list and I was wondering if you'd take a request? 🫣 33. Are you jealous? + 34. She/He's not you, with our sweet Alden Parker? I'm a s*cker for some angst and comfort 🥹

If you don't feel like it, or are not taking request, you can't just ignore this 🥰

Love your work!!!

I'm scared about this 😂 you're a better writer than me.

You and Alden walked side by side towards the building. The crisp morning air held a touch of chill, but you didn’t feel it. All you felt was Alden’s fingers that were lightly entwined with yours. Nick was the first to greet you, a teasing grin on his face. "Well, well, look who's here," he remarked, his voice playful, "The dynamic duo."

“Shut up, Nicky,” you said rolling your eyes as you let go of Alden’s hand to sit at your desk.

Director Vance stepped into the bullpen, drawing the attention of you all. "We've received a request from the FBI for our assistance on a case they're working on. The details are classified, but they believe our expertise can be invaluable in solving it."

As Vance wrapped up the briefing, he paused for a moment and looked toward the elevator. You noticed a familiar figure walking in from the elevator.

The newcomer approached their group, and your smirk grew as you locked eyes with the FBI agent. "Hello, trouble," he said with a sly grin.

"Hello yourself," You shot back, a playful glint in your eyes.

The team watched the exchange, a mix of curiosity and amusement. Alden, however, couldn’t help but feel a pang of jealously as you smiled at him.

Vance raised an eyebrow at the playful banter. "I see you two are acquainted."

You nodded, and decided to introduce him, "This is Ethan Blackwood, my childhood partner in crime."

Ethan extended his hand to Vance and the other team members. "Pleasure to meet all of you. [Y/N] and I go way back."

The team exchanged greetings with Ethan, but Alden kept his short and not sweet. You looked at Alden as if to ask what was wrong, but he walked away to sit at his desk.

Ethan stood beside the plasma screen and began to lay out the case. As he spoke, the team members paid rapt attention, scribbling notes. Except Alden.

After Ethan had provided an overview of the case, he walked over to your desk. With a hint of nostalgia in his voice, he said, "You remember the times we used to camp outside?"

You chuckled, "And our backyard movie nights."

Ethan pulled over a chair and took a seat next to you. "We were an absolute nightmare for our parents,”

“And the neighbours,” you added with a grin.

“Yeah, fascinating,” Alden spoke up, snapping you both out of your nostalgia, “Can we get on with the case?”

“What is your problem, Alden?” you asked with a furrowed brow, a hint of frustration in laced in your voice.

“I just want to do my job, so can we stop messing around now?” he replied.

Messing around? Why is he talking to you like that? His sour mood was really starting to piss you off.

As the day continues, Alden’s mood worsens. He’s now completely ignoring you, not even looking you or smiling at you like he usually does. As the hours passed his continued silence and avoidance, you couldn't help but feel a deep sense of hurt. You found yourself replaying your moments together, the smiles, the shared laughter. The stark contrast of his current behavior left you wounded and questioning what had gone wrong. The emotional distance between them felt like a growing chasm, and the pain of his cold shoulder gnawed at you, leaving you longing for the return of the connection that had defined your relationship.

Soon, insecurity sets in. You began to question whether you had done something wrong or if you were somehow responsible for his behaviour. Self-doubt crept through your mind, eroding your confidence. Were you not enough for him anymore?

After you all solve the case, the team says goodbye to Ethan and head home, except Alden. He’s still sitting at his desk, ignoring everything and everyone around him. You were getting really annoyed with him now. Apart from this morning, he’d barely spoken to you. He spoke to Tim, Jess and Nick but not you.

“So, what you up to now, trouble?” Ethan asked you. You shot a glance at Alden but since he was acting the way he was, you assumed your plans were cancelled.

“Nothing,” you replied, Alden, even though were didn’t seem like it, listened in, “What have you got in mind?”

“What about a drink? At our old hang out spot?”

“Is that place still there?” you laughed, snorting a little, you covered your mouth, embarrassed a little of the sound that just came out.

“Yeah, it’s still there,” Ethan replied.

“Do they still have our pictures up?” you asked as you picked up your coat and bag.

“Yours probably, mine no, I think they knew I was influenced by you,”

“That is so not true, I was an angel. You dragged me into it,”

“I didn’t start that bar fight now did I?”

Your banter continued all the way to the elevator. Your laughter and the hum of the computers the only sounds in the big orange room until the ding of the elevator echoed of the walls.

When you got to the bar, Ethan immediately started bombarding you with questions. Questions about Alden.

“Come on, how long?”

“How did you know?”

“The man has been glaring daggers at me all day,”

“Yeah, and he’s been ignoring me all day,” you scoffed, shaking your head, “A grown fucking man acting like a child. Can you believe it?”

You didn’t get an answer, instead, Ethan doubled over in hysterics.

“The fuck you laughing at?”

“You don’t see what’s happening here?” Ethan managed to say between laughs.

“No!” you yelled, but that just made him laugh even more, you rolled your eyes, your anger rising by the second, “Oh my god! What?!”

“Go talk to him. We’ll catch up another time,” he said taking your drink away from you. You went to protest but he pulled the drink further from your reach, “Go. You’ll thank me for it later,”

You rolled your eyes but left anyway, heading out the bar and to your “boyfriend’s” apartment. If you can still call him that.

When you arrived at the door, you paced, backwards and forwards until you gathered the strength to knock. You were nervous. But when he opened the door and you saw his face, your anger immediately returned. You crossed your arms and raised your eyebrows. He moved to let you in and closed the door behind you.

“What the hell was your attitude today?” you asked immediately after the door settled in it’s frame, “Why did you ignore me? What did I do to upset you?”

“[Y/N], I’m tired, can we talk about this tomorrow?” he deflected, which only spurred you on.

“No. You either tell me why you suddenly can’t look at me or I walk out that door and we’re done,” you told him, trying to keep your voice firm but it wavered slightly. You were suddenly afraid. Afraid of losing the man you loved.

He shrugged his shoulders, his tired eyes finding yours, “Probably for the best right?” you scoffed and went to the door, your hand resting on the handle. You turned back to look at him.

“8 months, Alden. 8 months,” you started, “They meant a lot to me, but obviously not to you,” you finished, opening the door and intending to end things with him, there and then.

“I can’t compete with that,”

You closed the door and turned back to him, “With what?”

“Ethan. Other men your age,” he answered, running a hand down his face.

Wait a minute was he…? No. He can’t be. Surely, he knows how gorgeous he is.

A small smile rested itself on your lips, “Wait, are you… are you jealous?”

Alden sighed deeply, his shoulders slumping a bit on the couch. He looked at you and finally admitted, "Yes, I'm jealous. I can't help it, [Y/N]. It's just that when I saw you and Ethan today, it got to me. Those 8 months meant the world to me too. But sometimes, I can't help but wonder if I'm enough for you."

You walked over to him, kneeling in front of him and taking his face in your hands, "Ethan has never been anything more than a best friend, except maybe a brother," you whispered softly, your gaze locked with Alden's. You placed a tender kiss on his lips, your thumbs stroking his cheeks. "But Alden, even if he was an ex, he's not you. No one will ever come close to you, baby."

“But I’m…” you cut him off with your lips. Your legs straddling his hips.

“You’re sexy,” you kissed him again, this time under his ear, “Handsome,” you said, your lips moving further down. “Gorgeous,” another kiss, “And the only man allowed to touch me,” you finished, sitting back to look at him. You placed another kiss on his lips, “Now is my man going to take me to bed?”

His beautiful eyes darkened and he stood, taking you with him and he carried you to bed. You didn’t care how long it takes, you were going to show this man that he was the only one allowed to touch like he did, the only one allowed to taste your skin on his tongue and the only one allowed to hear your moans.

[rainiishowers]

Hi, I have a request! Could you do the brothers' reaction to mc saying their favorite TSL character is the one based off of them without even knowing TSL was based on the brothers in the first place?

Like, someone asks MC who is it and they just go "___ is definitely my favorite", maybe even start going on a rant about how cool the character is or something lol

Lucifer

He knew that Levi had shown MC TSL and it's world, and he knew about the fact that Simeon had inspired the Seven Lords off of the brothers

Lucifer also knew that Levi had gotten Diavolo interested in such things

So here he was, at the castle with MC, watching with Barbatos as the crowned prince and the human exchange student rambled on about TSL

"Who's your favourite character, MC?"

"I can say without a doubt, the Lord of Corruption! He's such an interesting character, his schemes that he plots are so well thought out!"

Of course, Lucifer heard this and remembered that the Lord of Corruption was based on him

He got a bit red, but soon interjected with a whole load of other questions for MC

What they like most about him, what they like least about him, etc

Barbatos and Diavolo knew what he was doing, but Lucifer was sure that MC didn't know that their favourite lord was based on the Avatar of Pride himself

Mammon

A TSL marathon in MC's room is what got him into this situation

Mammon, MC and Solomon were watching some of the featured films, with the second eldest making sure the wizard didn't get too close to MC

While MC was putting on the last film, Solomon asked a question

"Out of random curiosity, MC. Out of all the characters, who is your favourite?"

"Definitely the Lord of Fools!"

Mammon knew that The Lord of Fools was based on him, but wanted to play it cool

"Well of course he's yer favourite! He's the best one out of all of 'em!"

"He acts all tough, but I personally think he cares for his brothers"

MC looks at Mammon

"That sounds kinda like you, Mams"

"W-What-- Pfft!- Nooo..."

MC's eyes narrow at him, the look causing Mammon to feel very very hot all the sudden

Eventually, MC shrugs and puts on the last movie

"Whatever, I hope we get to see him in this."

Maybe at some point, Mammon will let MC know

Leviathan

MC and Levi were watching TSL in the otaku’s room

Now, it took a while for Levi to understand that the brothers were the inspiration behind the seven lords

So he sort of… assumed that MC knew about this..

However, in one scene, the Lord of Shadows was doing a monologue in front of Henry, and MC was listening with rapt attention

“The Lord of Shadows is so cool, he has to be my favourite character!”

“Yea! He’s mine too!“ Levi replied

Realizing only seconds later that the Lord of Shadows was based on him

Was that a sign?! Could he actually have a chance with MC?!

His mind started to overeagerly jump to conclusions

But as he thought more and more about how the Lord of Shadows is so much cooler than him, and how he’s just a disgusting otaku, his self confidence went down the drain

Levi would love to be with MC, but will he ever have that chance?

Satan

He would often invite MC to read with him in his room

The book MC had chosen this time was the newest edition of TSL

He knew from conversations with Simeon that the characters of the title were based on the seven brothers

Satan had finished reading a chapter, and before he could start again, MC huffs

“The Lord of Masks is so handsome it’s almost infuriating!”

Satan, clearly amused and curious at this, gestures them to continue

“Like, I want to glide across a ballroom with him, but I also want to slap him in his stupidly handsome face!”

“I understand that feeling.”

Satan uses his magic to clear the floor of any books before getting up and turning on some music before offering a hand to MC

“Since slapping him nor ballroom dancing with him is a possibility, why don’t you ballroom dance with me instead?”

Maybe one day, he’ll tell them

Asmodeus

He knew the basic things from Solomon talking about to Levi’s rambles

Obviously, he was flattered when Simeon based the Lord of Lechery off him

When Asmo discovered MC was a fan, he was prepared for the conversations that Levi and MC would have in front of the brothers

During one of these times, specifically during dinner, Satan had asked out of pure curiousity who MC’s favourite character was

“Oh, that has to be the Lord of Lechery. He’s a bit… eccentric, but I think that makes him stand out.. I don’t think the author did him justice though…”

Asmo was touched, truly. Although he started to wonder if MC knew the character inspiration

“Hon.. Do you know who the lords are based off of?”

“Hm? No?”

“Doesn’t the Lord of Lechery remind you of someone…?”

MC squints, and Asmo could see the math being done in their head.

“He kinda reminds me of you, Asmo.”

MC gasped, slamming their hands on the table.

“Wait, did the author take inspiration from you guys to make the seven lords?!”

“Ding ding ding! You got it right!” Asmo grins.

Asmo couldn’t help but snicker at the shocked face of MC as they sat back down and started blanking out, presumably retracing all the signs that the inspo was there

Beelzbub

Honestly, he was probably one of the least knowledgeable brothers when it came to TSL. He only remembers that the brothers are the inspiration when it comes up (mostly from Levi’s rambles)

It was movie night, and MC, having been the movie picker, decided to pick the second film of TSL, having picked the first movie the previous week

Before the movie started, Belphie was on MC’s lap, using them as a pillow, as he usually does

“Hey MC, who’s your favourite lord in TSL?”

“Oh, I like The Lord of Flies! He’s a bit dumb, but that’s what is endearing about him. I honestly don’t think he gets enough screentime”

Wait MC likes the Lord of Flies? Beel wasn’t expecting that

But he did get a warm feeling inside as he munched on his popcorn

Belphegor

The brothers had gotten tickets for a TSL play because MC was having a tough week, and Lucifer wanted to do something special

The only reason his brothers and himself wanted to come is presumably so they can see MC happy

At the seats before the play started, Beel asked MC something

“Who’s your favourite character, MC?”

“Definitely the Lord of Emptiness! I think he’s an interesting guy because you never know what he’s thinking! Sometimes I wish I knew, but it would take away half of the mystery surrounding him.”

Belphie gave a shit eating grin to the rest of his brothers before laying his head on MC’s lap

“The youngest is always favoured.”

[mulderscully]

henlex ficrecs? i don't know where to start

i was like who tf is that til i realized some of u are calling firstprince that lol i'm sorry but i bring you porn only so i hope that's what you want 🫣

some of these are bookverse and some are movieverse and tbh i see no great difference bc it's the same relationship to me but i added a * to the ones that are specifically movieverse, the others are either an au or bookverse or a mix of movie and book

familiar gravity

"Yeah,” Alex breathes, and he pulls back to look Henry in the eyes. “I’ve been fantasizing about you fucking me in this chair for, like, weeks. Every time you sit down here with your stupid book.”

Henry likes it when Alex speaks Spanish and Alex has a request.

in the teeth of strong opposition

"You know what?" Henry says loudly, annoyed beyond belief that he has to hear for the millionth time how fucking cool Alex is with Henry's sexuality. "If you're such a good ally, why don't you suck me off? Since you're so insistent, why not get on your knees, Alex?"

He regrets the words as soon as he says them, but it's not like he can shove them back into his mouth; he can't take them back. He closes his eyes so he doesn't have to see the shocked expression on Alex's face and takes a few deep breaths.

"Sorry," he says tightly a moment later, eyes still closed. "That was uncalled for."

"Do you want me to?"

the red side goes up

Henry brings home a little something new to try in the bedroom. Or: The One Where Alex Gets Jealous of a Butt Plug.

bedroom warfare (3 part series)

Looking back at it, it's all Nora's fault.

Or, the time Henry and Alex bet on who can last the longest without sex.

voted most likely to run away with you*

Alex drifts into consciousness in a bed full of tangled limbs and warm, sleep-rumpled skin. He’s lying half on his stomach and half on his side, the shoulder smushed against the bed protesting in a way that tells him he’s going to have a crick in his neck for the rest of the day.

But fuck if he cares, with Henry stirring next to him, one of his long legs draped over the back of Alex’s thigh. Alex doesn’t need to open his eyes to know the room is hazy with filtered sunlight, spilling pale yellow through the carelessly drawn curtains.

who knew polo was such a turn on?*

Henry had no idea the horseback riding lessons he started as a child would lead to this.

save a horse, ride a cowboy

“Forget about walking,” Henry tells him boldly, giving him a hard kiss before he pushes himself back up vertical. “Just wait until you see me ride.”

baby*

Henry has plenty of pet names for Alex, but how did Henry end up with the pet name "Baby"?

i dream your name backwards

Three times Alex wakes up from a dream and can’t help but tell Henry about it, although they're apart and an ocean is between them.

And one time, Henry wakes up from a dream and Alex is there.

isn't it amazing how every line of our hands align

Alex knew it was going to be one of those days the moment he realized his third coffee of the day had absolutely zero effect on the turmoil of his thoughts. It was not even nearing ten in the morning when he had to face defeat, annoyed and broken down to a single thought: Henry was right. Not that he never was, far from it, but Alex had this kind of constant competitive streak with his boyfriend — and he hated admitting when Henry was right.

Or Alex is having a bit of a day, and Henry knows exactly how to help him out.

it's a scene (and we're out here in plain sight)

"I don’t want us to be in the press for anything other than how good I am at polo, and how charming you look in that shirt.”

Henry just wants the Fifth Annual Okonjo Foundation Polo Match to run smoothly, but that's harder than it seems.

i like that thing you do

Ever since the first polo match Alex attended, his obsession with Henry on a horse has only grew. Years into their relationship, Alex is still hanging onto the pitch's fence, watching with rapt fascination. Read to find out what happens when Phillip asks a question that creates a lust monster Alex can't control. No one ever said those white pants Henry wears aren't meant to be destroyed.

alright that's all 4 now i can do a non smut one later too but say hey if u see urself on her @ authors!

[whatisreggieshortfor]

Passions

Lewie x MC

Lewie’s favorite thing in the world is to see his best mate talk. So he doesn’t take well to the person that takes it away.

TW: references to sexual harassment

If he had any passion in the world, it would be wrapped in his favorite thing to do.

Because Lewie’s favorite thing to do in the world was listen to his best mate talk about something she loved, something she was zealous about, invested in. From the time they met in a Mum & Me class as children he could sit and listen to her for hours about her interests, even as they changed as they got older.

He would sit in awe as Brylin talked about dinosaurs. Watched mesmerized as she went on tangents about Greek gods and goddesses. Paid every bit of rapt attention as she gushed in detail about whatever stuck her fancy at any given time as they grew older.

The only thing that had ever compared was when he was on the pitch playing the game he loved, but if he had to decide between the two he always knew he’d hang up his footie boots without a second thought.

Brylin spent hours, days, memorizing statistics and strategy as she dived headfirst into the sport he was passionate about, sharing in his enthusiasm like he always shared in hers.

So it killed him when he needed to leave her, his platonic best mate, to go to training.

The longest they had ever spent apart before was one of them had a family trip growing up, and now he was going to be leaving for three months.

But the whole time he was gone, he would think about anything he could remember from her diverse rants and it would bring a smile to his face.

Lewie wasn’t stupid though, as much as his teammates ragged on him about it, he knew why her happiness brought his own to the surface.

His nan and his mum had been on him to just admit his feelings for years.

He was a go the distance guy, pursuing someone only when he felt it would become something with years down the line ahead of them.

So when training ended, he vowed he would finally tell her. He didn’t want to leave for away games without her wearing his jersey number, or have to see her sitting in the regular stands at home games instead of the family section where significant others got to be. He wanted to spend every success and every failure, every win and every loss with her.

Brylin was Lewie’s grand prize win, and she always had been.

But when he came home, he was shocked at what he saw.

Brylin- bright, zealous, beautiful, independent Brylin wasn’t what he remembered.

A coworker she’d been working with in the months he was gone trailed around her at the pub she met him at, never leaving them to have a chat and catch up, like a perpetual shadow.

At first, Lewie thought she found someone while he was gone, but then he actually watched them interact. The man had mentioned something about a movie he’d seen, and Lewie felt his chest swell with affection and anticipation as Brylin geared up to add her own input.

Until the man shut her down.

“Brylin, can’t ya stop gobbing for one bloody minute?”

And in that moment, Lewie saw the flicker die in her eyes. She stopped talking, losing the passion in her voice as she apologized for saying too much. And his heart shattered, wishing she could see the beauty in her eyes when she was raving about what she loved. It was a beauty unmatched by any other he’d ever seen, and this nobody had bullied that out of her.

Lewie gaped, unsure where the confident take-no-shit woman he had grown up with disappeared to be replaced with the one that awkwardly smiled and gestured for the man to continue.

So Lewie cut in, “Sorry, mate, what do you do again?”

He groaned, “I’m stuck interning in the company for now, but won’t be long before I become the new VP.”

“Dad run the place or something?” It’s the only thing he could think to explain how this guy could shut her down. She loved her job, she wouldn’t risk it by talking back to the wrong guy.

“Uncle,” the man smirked, his overly friendly hand reaching out and tugging Lewie’s best mate into his side by her hip- not noticing the way she tensed up.

Oh, bloody hell. From the look on her face, Lewie could tell this was something she’d been dealing with for the months he’d been gone. He remembered her saying she’d be stuck acting as a tour guide for the new person joining the company.

So Lewie ‘spilled’ his drink, sending the beer covering the man’s clothes, “Oh bloody- I am so sorry, mate!”

Brylin but back a smile, he could see it, not caring for the splashes of beer that would no doubt stain her clothes as her coworker glared and stomped his way to the loo. “Thank you so much.” She practically sagged in relief, and he was finally able to give her the hug he’s been itching to give her since he saw her again.

“Bloke needs to keep his hands to himself and his mouth shut.”

Brylin giggled, finally looking like the girl he knew, “I’ve tried to tell him I wasn’t interested, but I don’t actually know how much pull he has.”

“Lucky for you,” Lewie grinned, “I have a solution. My team needs a new PR manager.”

She looked at him incredulously, “Lew, I’m just an assistant.”

He shrugged, “I already gave them your résumé. Planned to tell you that your interview is in two days, but our trainer says it’s a formality.”

Her coworker came back a second later, scowl still present on his face as he grabbed her arm, “Come on, we need to go so I can change.”

Her brow furrowed as she pulled her arm back, “Why do I need to leave?”

“My girl isn’t staying out without me.”

“I’m not your girl!” She snapped back, trusting Lewie, as she always had about everything, that she wouldn’t be screwed out of her career.

“She’s mine.” The footballer offered confidently, but if you knew him as well as she did, you could hear the anxious underpinning of his tone.

The man scoffed, but before he could open his mouth Brylin was jumping into the leap of faith her best mate gave her, “I am. I only agreed to let you meet him so that you’d finally leave me the bloody hell alone!”

Due her raised voice, patrons all over the pub were looking their way, leaving her coworker trying to grasp at how to control the conversation, before he finally smirked, “Hope you enjoyed your job then, cause I’ll make sure you don’t have one.”

“I don’t want to work for a company that would employ someone like you.” She answered defiantly, letting herself lean into Lewie’s side as the man angrily turned and shoved his way out the door. “Ah!” She cheered, looking at her best mate, “I could kiss you!”

Lewie knew a lot of things, but something he knew the most was how to read Brylin. He knew her expressions, her personality, it was like he could read her thoughts at times.

So he mustered up every ounce of courage he ever had in his body, taking hold of her hips and spinning her around to face him.

And then he kissed her.

His fingers shook slightly, a tremor he couldn’t shake from the fear that he made the wrong move.

But then she was pressing back.

Not to push him away like he half expected, but pushing into him. Embracing him, returning the kiss.

As she pulled back, a smile broke out across her face, highlighting the joy and zeal he had always loved to bring out in her eyes, “It’s about time.”

Lewie laughed, holding her tighter, “What can I say? I gotta follow my passions.”

[fly-underground]

six hundred and eighty: 2023

so the weekend i saw yuan and had so much fun in SF, was the last weekend cory was alive. that’s when i wore this outfit, which i remember thinking i’d capture in a picture and post here. but then everything changed. that was the weekend of october 7th. so when cory died peacefully in his home, thousands of palestinians were being killed in theirs. they still are. what a bizarre, sick time. a time not to celebrate, but to grieve and lament and witness.

2023 has been a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad year—and i mean that sincerely, but i also don’t. there were good things too. not just the shiny, post-to-the-gram things like promotions and vacations, but ordinary good things we learn to take for granted.

i saw the sun rise again and again. i ate good food, some of which i cooked. i got to see a lot of the people i love in person. i talked to some of them on the phone. i read more books this year than i read in the previous two years combined. i listened to great music and watched great (and terrible) movies.

there were some moments where i felt, surprisingly, like it would all be okay. this incredible lightness that must be love, god, whatever. i want to bottle that feeling and drink it like water, like my entire life depends on it. i think it does.

in january, i went on a handful of first dates with men and women. that's when i met E, and at first it was great. by march, when i got my first wisdom tooth extracted, i noticed her distance. but it was fleeting, only when she had guests from out of town, or when she went out of town, when work piled up, when life was happening, so i ignored it. by may, we were exclusive, which i largely orchestrated and i thought i'd feel better by then. i didn't. i flinched when my phone would buzz. i wanted to hear from her and also never hear from her. by july, i had everyone i love telling me to end things. so i did. baby's first initiated break up. it was a clean break. i felt good and strong and also foolish. i remember my hands shook the day after and i was so out of it, that i had a small accident.

i turned 31 this year, but i was 30 when this all happened and i hated it. i hated how small i felt, lonely, like i needed to ask for less. here were the things i asked for: to text me more than every 3 or 5 or 8 days. that was it. if you have to ask for that, it's probably not going to work anyway.

also in february, i got covid for the second time and got glass in my eye and had to go to the ER and then it was all okay. but that's how delicate the body is. i did a reading for valentine's day, my first of the year!

in march, i went home for amit's birthday. and also in march, i saw VIRAHA at the harvard bookstore. people were buying the books, what a joy!

in april, i wrote more and also not enough.

in may, my mom came to boston for mother's day and then i went to austin for a work trip. at this point, there was something wrong with my hearing and i got it resolved in October.

in june, i did my first in-person reading in YEARS at the cantab poetry lounge via the boston poetry slam. my mom was there and tanner was there and disha and annie and it was such an incredible feeling, i wish i could share it with you all. i felt so present and grateful for my life. to read my poems and have people listen with rapt attention. that's magic.

in july, yes that break up but also i went outside a lot and had long talks with the people i love.

in august, tanner and i went to utah and that was such a strange joy, to see that part of the country. right after, i went home to see my people who i hadn't seen since march. liz and vivian and max.

in september i turned 31, a magical day that i made possible that tanner attended without complaint. and then right after, the death of a friend's parent, i was back in new york. that was the last time i saw cory. i started therapy a few weeks later, for my OCD and depression and generalized anxiety.

in october, yes i saw yuan in SF and then i saw her again when i went home when cory died. and we all sat in the living room that was once his.

in november, my mom turned 69 and we had a great time celebrating despite all our grief. and then michael came over to build some ikea furniture, which i'm sharing here because it's so nice! who does that? we had thanksgiving and it felt both good and empty. when i came back to boston, tanner and i had to stay in a hotel because of carbon monoxide issues at our place. and then—

december, where i went to mexico with my team for our retreat and then i came home and the carbon monoxide was resolved. and tanner and i had some fun there, before we came down to new york for christmas with my family and he met vivian, liz, max. we did all the new york city things and it seemed to lighten everyone's spirits—which were down, because man this year! then he went back home and before i could join him, there was a mystery not covid, apparently the flu illness that took over my family. so now i'm writing this on the acela back to boston. i'll get in before 2023 bows out.

i have no idea who is still reading this, but if you are: thank you. if you're future me, hello from the past. i hope 2024 is full of joy, love, light, easy wins. less death, less aching, less pain. it feels like a good year, like the moment before something wonderful happens in a movie and everyone, even the characters on screen, is holding their breath—with hope

[wolves-etc]

thoughts on The Last Of Us episode one, largely in the order I had them:

[thoughts on: 1.2 | 1.3 | 1.4 | 1.5 | 1.6 | 1.7 | 1.8 | 1.9]

(I have some spoilers from tumblr, a vague awareness of the older gays & younger gays situations, and a friend's recommendation that I'd really like this show. I didn't realise how evocative this would be in a mid-pandemic world. the show quickly set me right.)

— all kudos and respect to mr "I have an opportunity to infodump to a crowd about disturbing fungal diseases and I am going to make the most of it." loses points for warning people about hypothetical future dangers while actively smoking at them.

— the views we get of the crowd and the host during the second half of his speech are interesting - they're so still, all rapt attention, while he's talking about humans made puppets. it's unsettling.

— and the visuals during the theme music? gross. the guy who recommended this to me is squicked out by fungus. I may have used the words "wetly unfurling" while confronting him about this.

— I'm struck by the apparent ritual of joel setting his alarm, sleeping through it or ignoring it, and having to be alerted by his daughter anyway. he's a mess. (<3)

— there's something very real and unsanitised about their home environment. sarah's presumably not the worst cook in the house, but still they're eating eggshell. there's takeaway in the fridge that tommy sniffs before having any (though I wish he didn't decide against it then put it back.)

— and joel's shirt is on inside-out. bless him.

— sarah and joel passive-aggressively siccing the neighbours on each other is bitchy and great

— the first glimpse of the unrest of the pandemic being someone visibly panicking, closing the shop, herding sarah out, telling her to go straight home? I'm trying not to do too much real-life comparing. but that's ouch.

— we have a dog!! a border collie!! mercy I love you I am giving you up for dead given the genre we're in but I very much hope to be proven wrong <3

— "three nails plus one cross equals four-given." please, please tell me people don't speak like that. lie if you must

— the mental shift from "that blurry old lady in the background needs medical attention" to "oh. oh this is a horror show, the characters just don't know that yet, oh no" was a fun one

— "and you were never gonna [get the watch fixed] for yourself" OH BOY

— it's functional depression vibes in joel and it's intense. he won't get the watch fixed for himself, and he probably wouldn't celebrate his birthday for himself either - I'd buy that the pancakes could have been more for sarah than him, but then she insists on cake, and he doesn't suggest anything he'd enjoy better. still, he seems willing to make an effort because she wants to, and that's nice.

— that moment, sitting down to watch a movie together, sarah falling asleep against him? joel's a mess, but he has a good relationship with his daughter, and that's refreshing to see. there's real love there.

— mercy is a very good dog and sarah COULD DO WITH MORE ANXIETY SLASH SURVIVAL INSTINCT, FRANKLY,

— and we get the first glimpse of joel being brutal and unhesitating when it's called for. the sense that he's already made a shift in thinking that sarah's slower to - she's scared, crying, not yet really believing that it was necessary.

— sarah in the back of the car being smart enough to put together - given what she knows - that any one of them could be infected. it's awful.

— "[they've] got a kid, joel." "so have we. keep driving." fuck

— (how must that feel for sarah? if she's the thing to be protected, it must be her fault.)

— okay the infected's too-quick movements and bird-like head tilts? very "inhuman software on human hardware." it's cool.

— this scene here, though. there's a lot here. they're saved, in the nick of time, by a soldier. the soldier receives orders that he has to double-check. joel calls him sir, says please don't, has to know what's coming. it's unfair and it's horrible and there's nothing he can do.

— and I had a lot of thoughts about that. about how the US military - quite aside from the huge wrongs it does to other countries - promises people to chance to do some good, and to be a part of a family, and betrays them on both counts. leaves its soldiers with trauma and no way to manage it. leaves them, perhaps, with chronic depression, in a job I don't even want to speculate about because neither the military nor construction work are kind to the body. it's betrayal on top of betrayal as standard. and it's cruel, very cruel, that the military betrays joel again here. (edit for reasons and for at least one "article" possibly lying to me)

— and it's a fucking needless way for sarah to die. fuck.

— okay. okay.

— we get this little reminder that the birds, the trees, the sunlight, they all keep going. no matter what goes on with humans. and I, for one, find that comforting.

— and that comfort is VERY NEEDED because holy shit it's twenty years later and joel barely even hesitates to throw a bound child's body onto the fire. (practical and brutal, when it's needed. I don't even want to wonder whether he's done it before.)

— he's still wearing his broken watch and he is very much not okay.

— tess is all steel. I'm a little scared of her as a person and I love her as a character. what the fuck are they both up to that they can handle criminal dealings like this.

— "I promised him you wouldn't hurt him, but I would very much like for you to hurt him." CLEAR AND TO THE POINT.

— no but that's a lot of fun though. clear communication, what seems like no real lies when she's negotiating with her captor, just a forthright attitude that's so easy to believe and a comfortable willingness to mislead him.

— "you don't have a fucking ear on your fucking head" would be a fun way to accuse someone of not listening

— "y'all talk it through, but please remember that I'm bleeding out." I LIKE MARLENE

— and here we see joel's fight response to trauma, which will, I hope, serve him well. that flashback was evil though.

— what the FUCK is the expression on ellie's face. is that awe. is that delight. miss, you're very fucked up, do you know that

things I expected: ellie being a murder child; joel being a traumatised badass with a soft spot for her. did NOT expect ellie to be THAT much of a murder child, or joel's soft spot to be that well-armoured. this is gonna be interesting to see.

and I didn't expect tess, who's interesting, and scary in her own right, and rugged in a way women aren't generally allowed to be in the zombie genre. this was a really pleasant surprise.