#thank you though anon you've always been very respectful

[asteria7fics]

yeah, no offence to you of anything, but i wouldn’t want to talk to you privately. i’ve never had a good experience when talking with an adult privately (or even publicly) online. ‘cause i’ve been on vr chat and discord since i was abt 8 or 9, and now as a freshman i can tell you i was in fact not mature for my age despite how much i was told that💀💀 and i wouldn’t want to break your boundary either😿 (but the long sigh was in reference to the tags in the one response to tsob art😋😋😋)

-😨

No offense taken at all! I'm actually very happy to hear you have that mentality, though I'm sorry to hear that adults have not handled their interactions with you responsibly in the past.

Again, I won't get into a full trauma dump (especially to you dear anon haha) but I was groomed by an adult that I thought would be 'safe' in my early teens, and it really fucked me up for a long time. I've dealt with a lot of it now, thanks to a lot of therapy and accepting that I was actually a victim in the situation, but it will never fully leave me.

Also, yeah life lesson don't fucking trust any adult that says you're "mature for your age" that shit can be so insidious and gross. Oof.

But yes, thank you for the respect towards my boundaries! I'm happy to do what I can to keep this fandom a safe place for everyone to enjoy, yah know?

P.S. Haha I hoped as much!

[hughiecampbelle]

The Boys Preference: Being Becca and Butchers Child

Requested: Firstly HAPPY BIRTHDAY GIRL!!!!!! ﾟ+.ヽ(≧▽≦)ﾉ.+ﾟ. Secondly, could u write like some headcanon about being Butcher's child (like who is two years older than Ryan) and how other members from the boys (+ maybe Soldier boy, cause of season 3 and how he would interact with them :3) - anon

A/N: Thank you my love!!! In the headcanon I made reader 10+ years older so they'd be at least 18 by the time they found out about Becca and Ryan, I hope you don't mind!! That way they can be part of The Boys and grow up with them, if that makes sense? I also had a very similar request of a headcanon so I'm basing it off that so there's some background :) I love this request!!! Feedback is always appreciated 💜💜💜

Headcanon Pt. 1 / Headcanon Pt. 2

Butcher knew he couldn't take care of you. He was getting drunk every night, picking fights at bars, searching the city for your mom. Your perfect grades were slipping, you were getting into fights at school, you were emulating him. He knew how dangerous that was. First with your Aunt, then your Great Aunt, until you tracked him down all these years later. He still has a picture of you in his wallet, a baby picture that's creased and faded. You and Becca. You've grown up since then, though. And you're angry. He insist you go back to Judy, pretend you never saw or heard what you did, but you refuse. You want to pick a fight with him. You want to yell and scream and get out eight years worth of grief. He understands where you're coming from, he does. He never wanted to be like his father and yet, in so many ways, that's exactly who he was. Your relationship will never be what it is. That's not possible anymore. You have to learn to deal with one another now, in the present, instead of the happy kid you used to be, instead of the dad he used to be. It hurts you both to think about the past, who you could have been instead of who you are.

Hughie isn't really sure what to do with you. There's no doubt you're Butcher's kid. He's still relatively new to the team, so he just assumed this was something else Butcher hadn't shared with him. When he realizes no one knew about your existence, he's shocked. You, like your father, gravitate towards Hughie for reasons you can't put into words. You'll let him sit next to you when you're watching TV and maybe even talk to him if you're in the right mood. You don't shoot daggers at him like you try with everyone else. Similar to a cat, he's someone you can stand to be around. He comes to your defense a lot, especially when you stumble in drunk and pass out for the day. He's sure if any of them had been raised by Butcher, or at least the outside relatives, they would have turned out exactly like you. He can't blame you for being angry, or pissed, or hurt. He can see the hurt better than anyone else no matter how much you try to hide it. He thinks you just need some time and empathy to get straightened out. The least they can do is offer that, right?

Annie has no idea what to do with you. She tried smiling and talking to you, but you didn't want anything to do with her. She reminds you too much of your Aunt. She always said you should be happier, bubblier, that you were so smiley as a kid. You couldn't live in the past like her, with her. Too much had changed. Hughie assures her it's nothing against her, you're just getting used to things. She thinks it's sweet how you're attracted to Hughie. He's the only one you mildly respect and even, once in a blue moon, listens to. She doesn't take it too personally considering you're ready to rip your fathers head off. It could be a lot worse. Over time you see that Annie and Hughie are together and that definitely earns her some points. Annie can't imagine what your life must have looked like, all those years mourning your mother and father, all those years spent with relatives just doing their best. She understood why you were so angry all the time, so cagey and spiky. She doesn't hold it against you.

M.M. feels conflicted. Betrayed isn't the right word, but it's the closest thing he can come up with. He never 100% trusted Butcher. He was always going behind everyone's backs, doing what he wanted despite the good of the team, etc. He was destructive, combative, and spiteful. But, he thought they knew each other better than that. When he met you he couldn't deny you were Butcher's. Your mannerisms, the crazed look in your eye when you were upset, it all matched your father. He can't help but see you like how he sees Janine, even if you're much older: a victim of Vought. A generational curse. You're stubborn, and angry, and distant all because of what's been done to you, all because of Homelander. If your mom had been around, if Homelander had never done what he'd done, you'd still have your perfect family. He feels this need to protect you the same way he does with your father, even if you both fight him on it, even if you don't want or deserve it. He can't help it.

Frenchie doesn't trust you the same way he doesn't trust your father. He especially doesn't like that you and Kimiko are so close. She doesn't tell him anything about your conversations, knowing it would completely break your trust if she did. He believes Butcher would hide something as big and important as a child. He knows what your family can be like. Lying, drunken, selfish, vengeful. You're only a few of those things, not that he can tell the difference. You know Frenchie isn't your biggest fan, so you love messing with him, teasing him, rubbing it in his face that you and Kimiko are close. Similar to your father, Frenchie thinks this isn't the kind of place for you. You have no idea what you're getting yourself into. M.M. might feel fatherly towards you, but Frenchie sees you as a Mini Butcher, just another handful no one on the team can deal with. You yell and scream and fight and drink. That proves to him you're still a child despite it all.

Kimiko adores you. Despite the difference in circumstances, she sees a lot of herself in you. Ripped from your family, angry and hostile and doing everything in your power not to get hurt again. Besides Hughie, you'd warm up to her second. You're actually incredibly smart despite never applying yourself and pick up the signs pretty quickly. Whatever you can't sign, you write to her, wanting your conversations to stay secret. You show her the pictures of your mom that you kept all these years, telling her all about the good times you had before she disappeared. When you see Butcher you instantly grow hostile, angry all over again, and the person she saw, the person she was just talking to who was kind, and thoughtful, and smart totally disappears. When you blast your angry music she never minds. In fact, she quite likes it, adding it to her own playlist. She doesn't look at you like you need fixing or, worse, need to get out of here.

Bonus! Homelander always knew about you. Becca was more than willing to talk about you and Billy to co-workers. He even remembers taking that picture with you that one Christmas. He's kept an eye on you through the years, but you never seemed like the vengeful type. You never knew what happened after your father abandoned you. He does, however, use it as leverage against Becca. Remember the kid you left behind? Seems like she's got favorites. Becca agonizes over leaving you, but she was caught between a rock and a hard place. He uses you to keep her there, in her place. He gives her updates, usually to make her feel bad. You're kid drinks way too much, did you know that? Of course you didn't. He loves to tell her that Butcher abandoned you all those years ago. He loves to see that it absolutely kills her. He's not worried about you coming after him. You've got to work through your issues before you get to him and therapy for a lifetime couldn't get you an Butcher on the same page.

Bonus! Soldier Boy would actually get along with you. I think you'd have a Worst Dad Competition and though you're close, you definitely think you win. You two share a drink and you tell him all about your dear old dad. "No wonder you turned out like this." Ben says, pouring you more. Hughie urges you to slow down, but you have a high tolerance. Ben, to piss of Butcher, will always take your side in arguments and uses what you told him against him. "You dumped them off and never looked back. Now you're parenting?" Butcher absolutely hates it. You tell him about your mom, how much she loved you, how she was killed. You don't mention Ryan though, knowing Ben's go to answer would be to seek revenge. You have a lot of complicated feelings around your brother, but you still have a burning Hatred for Homelander. You make Ben promise he'll kill him. He does, even if it means killing his son. You two bond really fast. Neither Hughie nor Butcher trusts it or him, but you do.

[sanemistar]

Hey lovely! Is there any chance you’d do a Sanemi x female!reader (she’s a hashria) one shot?

She’s been dating him for ages but all of a sudden she breaks up with him and gets with some other guy straight away, so sanemi is super hurt/angry about it (he was about to about to propose). Anyway, fast forward to the hashria training arc and she’s there with the new guy (he’s a demon slayer), he can see that reader is super uncomfortable around this guy so he’s super suss about the whole thing. Sanemi ends up overhearing the guy she’s now dating that he was actually threatening reader to hurt everyone she loves (especially Sanemi) if she didn’t dump him and date her. But fight insures and blah blah blah, happy ending with them getting back together!

I hope that makes sense, but you have creative freedom to whatever you think is best! Also if you don’t want to write it I fully respect your decision, but if you do write it thank you so much ❤️

never let you go — sanemi shinazugawa

pairing: sanemi x hashira fem!reader

genre: angst, fluff, lovers to exes then back to lovers

wc: 2.2k+

warnings: usage of threats, slight swearing, not proofread oops

a/n: i hope you enjoy reading <33 this was so fun to write thank you for requesting lovely anon !!

you and sanemi have been dating for ages, everyone knows how madly in love you two are with each other. you two are basically inseparable, wherever you are you’re always seen with him, to the point where other people start whispering 'that's the wind hashira's girl' when they see you. you two are the epitome of love basically. so it’s to be expected that you two will end up married at some point, and that’s been your longtime boyfriend’s plan all along. he has been planning to propose to you for so long and today he’s about to finally take that next big step in your relationship.

on a lovely spring day, sanemi leaves you a message with his crow, asking you to come by his estate later because he wants to tell you something very important, so you prepare yourself and excitedly leave your estate to see him, wondering about what is that important thing that made your boyfriend so eager to see you. your train of thought is forced to cut short, though, when someone grabs your hand which stops you from going any further. you take a moment to inspect the person standing in front of you, he seems to be a demon slayer but one of a lower ranking based on his attire. but something about him feels odd and you feel slightly uncomfortable around him.

"going somewhere, y/n?" his way of addressing and talking informally to you as if you two are very familiar with each other pisses you off, can't he see your haori, does he not know you're a hashira and that he should speak to you respectfully?

"and why i should explain myself to you?" you push him out of your way and keep on walking, you don't want to be late for sanemi's meetup. but he grabs your hand and stops you once again, this time his grip is harder than the last time to ensure that you stay still.

"i can't let you go, y/n. i love you. please go out with me." you're taken aback by the sudden, uncalled for love confession. does this guy not know that you already have a boyfriend? and he's not just any boyfriend, he's the infamous wind hashira.

"don't you think you're too bold to ask me such nonsense? i have a boyfriend, you know?" you inform him, eyes looking sharp. he's clearly pissing you off, you should be in sanemi's arms right now, but instead, some random guy is wasting your time.

"i don't care, i'm not leaving until i make you mine." the guy is still persistently pestering you. no matter how many times you reject him, he still begs and pleas. you've had enough of his constant begging and finally reach your limit, so you quickly grab you katana and point it against his throat.

"if you don't stop what you're doing, you're going to regret what i'm about to do next." you speak sternly. but he doesn't seem to be fazed in the slightest. to your surprise, his entire demeanor changes and he pulls away your katana as it drops on the ground. and before you even get a chance to react, he quickly turns around points his own katana very close to the crook of your neck.

"i think you're the one who's going to regret what i'm about to do if you don't go out with me, someone might get hurt, like your boyfriend for example." he whispers into your ear, with a voice full of threat. you know sanemi is a very strong man, but you simply don't want to put the love of your life in danger because of you, you'll never forgive yourself if anything happens to him. so you choose to give up and surrender yourself to the man's demands, all for the sake of sanemi. you always put his safety and wellbeing before everything else, even before your own desires.

"i'll let you go for now, you know what to do, right?" he warns you. you grit your teeth, trying to suppress the tears eager to fall down your cheeks. it pains you to leave the one man you love the most in the world and the only one for you, after you had promised each other to never be apart until death do you part. you can't believe you're about to break your promise in the worst way possible.

with now a heavy heart, you walk towards your boyfriend's estate and sanemi instantly greets you with a tight embrace. you bury your face deep in his warm, bare chest. you wish you could stay there forever, but the words from earlier ring vividly in your ears, causing you to jolt, startling both you and sanemi.

"you 'kay, y/n?" sanemi asks in both confusion and worry, he's sensing there's something unusual about you today, but he can't seem to know exactly what it is.

"i'm... fine." you try your best to assure him. though he's still convinced you're acting strange, he decides to drop his suspicions for now. he has something much more important to tell you, his long awaited proposal.

"i have something to tell you." you both say in unison, but sanemi insists that you should go first. you take a deep breath, your heart weighs heavy. you feel tongue tied, as if your body refuses to let you say what you're about to say next, but you force yourself to.

"i... i want to break up, sanemi." your words drop on him like a bomb, he's surely never seen this one coming. he's hurt and angry, he knows you love him so much, so why are you suddenly asking for a breakup.

"shit, tell me what is it that i did wrong? i promise i'll fix it, just please don't leave me, y/n." you've never seen sanemi this vulnerable before, you can clearly hear the pain and desperation in his tone. it breaks your heart knowing that you're causing him to be in this state, but you're left with no choice. you have to protect him, even if it costs you to earn his hatred for the rest of your life.

"there's no point. it can't be fixed. thank you for everything and goodbye, sanemi." you kiss him goodbye one last time before you quickly run away as the tears you've been holding for so long finally get released, forcing yourself to never look back. because you know that you'll get weak and throw yourself in his arms once again if you do. he watches as you slowly disappear from his line of sight before he breaks down, he's feeling utterly bitter at you for leaving him behind just like that without telling him why.

fast forward a while later, amane-sama summons all the hashiras and announces that there will be a hashira training to prepare for the final fight against muzan, and everyone must participate, which means that you’ll meet up with sanemi more frequently. if it were any normal occasion, you’d be very happy to spend time with him. but with everything that has happened, you’re not looking forward to it.

after the meeting is done you immediately prepare yourself to leave, unable to stay a minute longer knowing that sanemi is right there but you can't hold him in your arms. obviously the rest of them notice how awkward you behave around each other now, wondering why you broke up with sanemi and left him for some random guy who seems to be much less than what you deserve, especially when you and sanemi were so perfect for each other. but they decide not to pry into the matter further in respect of your private life.

the minute you step into the training grounds, you're met with your 'new boyfriend' waiting for you at the entrance as he wraps his arm around you. the sight of him brings immense pain in your heart, you can't stand seeing his face.

"how was it, baby?" your stomach turns upset upon hearing his voice and you feel sick to your core the moment he lays finger on your skin.

"good." you reply nonchalantly. you always keep your replies to a bare minimum, usually reply with a short sentence, sometimes even with just one word. you'd rather not talk to him at all, but you force yourself to.

sanemi notices that you're feeling very uncomfortable around the guy, it’s very clear to his eyes despite him standing at a distance. which makes him instantly feel something is wrong about the whole thing. like why would you date someone you're not comfortable with? he knows this is unlikely of you, so he starts to investigate further.

even after the breakup, sanemi still has feelings for you. he's never moved on from you, he’s only ever loved you, no matter how many times he tries to. he has no interest in any other girl, you're so exceptional he can't seem to find a girl that's as amazing as yourself, you're the only one in his eyes. so he promises himself to do everything he can to bring you back to him once more.

then one day while he's cooling off after a long training session, sanemi sees a bunch of low-ranking demon slayers gathered around a guy and he immediately recognizes his face, it's the guy that stole you away from him. he tightly clenches his fists until his knuckles turn white, furious is an understatement to describe how he’s feeling right now.

he accidentally overhears them asking him how he got you to break up with one of the strongest hashiras and date him instead, and he tells everyone how he threatened you to hurt your loved ones, especially sanemi himself, if you refuse to break up with sanemi and date him.

everything makes sense now, why you broke your promise to him by suddenly asking to breakup without giving any justifications whatsoever. sanemi is incredibly enraged by his statement, his blood is boiling and his veins are popping up, his vision is blinded by all the pent up anger. his body moves automatically towards where the guy is and delivers a strong punch onto his face, completely destroying that cocky look smeared on it.

"you fuckin' asshole!" sanemi shouts angrily as he continues to ruthlessly punch that jerk multiple times to a point where his knuckles start bleeding, no one is daring to intervene in any way. they just let sanemi beat him to his heart's desire. after quite some time, sanemi finally stops and grabs him by the collar.

"you better fucking never show your face to y/n or bother her ever again, ya hear me? try being near her again and i'll fuckin' kill you." the guy only nods in fear, not even being able to speak. sanemi lets go of him and drops his now passed out body on the floor.

desperately searching for you, sanemi keeps running and running asking everyone around for you. until he finds you as you're about to enter your estate. he rushes to you like crazy and embraces you from behind, startling you.

"why did you handle this all by yourself, y/n? why didn't ya tell me?" sanemi asks you in between his crying, and your whole body flinches upon hearing his cries. you know how sanemi hardly ever cries in front of anyone, especially you. because he doesn't want you to worry about him, so he only shows you his strong side.

"i had no choice, i wanted to protect you. i wouldn't have forgiven myself if you had been put in danger because of me." you join him in sobbing as you turn around and bury yourself in his chest once again. you cry your heart out in his arms as he pats your head softly until you slowly begin to calm down. he cups your delicate face in his hands as his calloused thumbs wipe away your tears gently.

"i love you, y/n." he speaks softly, as if he's whispering. you feel butterflies all over your stomach the moment you hear your name slipping out of his lips, you've missed his voice so much.

"i love you too, nemi." you reply back, looking at him ever so endearingly. you lean closer and capture his lips in a loving, passionate kiss. you feel his hands move from your face and rest onto the sides of your waist, pulling you closer to him and you smile into the kiss.

after some time, the two of you break the kiss. yet your eyes are locked on his big, lilac ones.

"i'll never let you go, not now, not ever." sanemi kneels down on one knee, grabbing out a small box with a beautiful ring in it. you feel tears slowly forming into your eyes yet again, this time they're happy tears.

"will you marry me, y/n?" he finally proposes to you, sure the proposal isn't the most grand or extravagant. but you don't mind it in the slightest, this is more than enough to you, the fact that you're finally back together with the man you adore the most is what's important to you.

"yes, of course. my nemi." no hint of hesitation is to be found in your tone, it's the easiest and quickest yes you've ever said. you can't believe you're about to spend the rest of your life with your one and only love. you have no idea what life has in store for the two of you, but one thing for sure is that no matter what happens, you'll always be by sanemi’s side and never leave.

[parvulous-writings]

Could I request dating headcanons for Simon 'Ghost' Riley, Johnny 'Soap' MacTavish, and poly Ghoap with gn s/o please? - Fluff anon

Warnings: Oh boy... This be sweet...

Notes: Did I get carried away? Absolutely. I love my boys!! Thank you, Fluff, for indulging me!!

𝔖𝔦𝔪𝔬𝔫 ℜ𝔦𝔩𝔢𝔶

Simon likes to keep his civilian life very firmly separate from his work-life. You know that he's fairly high up in the military, that he often has to be very brutal, and the names of his closest companions. This took years to get out of him, though, and he flat out refuses to tell you anything else, or expand on the information you've already pried from him. "You don't need t'know any of that, love... Don't you worry your pretty little head about it, 'kay?" And that's that. You don't know about 'Ghost', and he'd very much like to keep it that way. He wants to stay your Simon, the sweet, if not awkward, young man you fell for years ago.

He's gone a lot - active service unfortunately demands it. He sends messages when he can, but rarely calls when he's away - you assume it's because he either doesn't want to risk, or can't risk, you overhearing anything in the background. He tries his best to make it up to you when he's on leave, though. Little date nights here and there, spending quality time together - he'll even acquiesce and let you watch your favourite schlocky movies or tv shows, no matter how much he normally pretends to hate them. In truth, they do hold a special place in his heart. They remind him of you, and for that, he'll always appreciate them, in a strange way. Sometimes he'll play half an episode on his phone, when he's away and has a chance - just to keep that piece of you with him.

Physical affection has two facets, with Simon. The public, and the private. In public, he stays almost unnervingly close to you, especially in crowds, but doesn't usually hold your hand or even touch you. Unless he needs to pull you away from something for your own safety, he isn't really a massive fan with expressing his love through public displays of affection; but he doesn't mind if you hug his arm whilst walking, or want to lean into him whilst sitting in a restaurant booth. In private, he isn't quite 'all over you', but he is very close. He doesn't like being in a different room to you most of the time, and if you're in the living room, you're not just going to be sitting around - he will be cuddling you, in some way. Whether he's perched you on his lap, or pulled you into his side - or even, on the rare occasion, when he lets you be the bigger spoon.

𝒥𝑜𝒽𝓃𝓃𝓎 𝑀𝒶𝒸𝒯𝒶𝓋𝒾𝓈𝒽

Johnny does talk a little bit about his time with the task force - unless, of course, he is legally required to not disclose some information (which is a fair amount, but he tries to find workarounds if something is genuinely bothering him). You know his friendships with Simon, Kyle, and Price are all strong - forged in the fires of conflict, and durable enough to withstand it all and more. You know that Price acts a bit like a father, Kyle is the 'funny guy' ("'Sides me, o'course, hen,"), and Simon is Johnny's stoic lieutenant, who he admires, respects, and holds very dearly. Though Johnny has never said the words exactly, you get the impression that Simon is something of a best friend figure to the Scot. Johnny doesn't go in depth or in detail about his missions, he only really speaks about it if there's something that's been bothering him.

He's gone often, but he keeps in contact as much as he can; calls, texts, and video calls whenever he gets the chance. He's often in the rec room when you're on call, and you can hear a faint 'hello' from Gaz whenever he catches Soap on the phone. When he's at home, his favourite thing to do is stay at home with you, and watch movies. Particularly old, or schlocky ones. Sharknado, Attack of the Lederhosen Zombies, and all other manner of B, or even C-rated movies come out. They're usually meant to be horror, but they're often so tacky they don't come across as it. Throw in that night's take out of choice, and boom! Johnny's perfect date night with you.

His main love language is physical touch, so public displays of affection with Johnny are a must, whether it's hand-holding, an arm around your shoulders, or him playfully putting you in a headlock when you're out and about with your friends. The headlock also appears in your private life as well - it's his own, special, silent 'I love you'. It's uniquely him, too. That playful, rough edge that he has, put into his affection. He likes to fall asleep on you a lot, too. Snuggling in bed, or on the sofa, draped over you like a muscled blanket. Something about being close to you soothes his soul, and allows him to sleep with little issue.

Simon and Johnny

There's a small clash with how Simon and Johnny communicate whilst away from you, but they manage to find a slight compromise. Johnny will call you, and drag Simon into view or onto the line if he gets too close to the Scot whilst he's talking to you. He isn't begrudging when he talks to you, but he's very aware of what sounds or sights can be picked up by the phone. He takes privacy and secrecy very seriously, does Simon.

When they're home, you always have practically glued to your hip, no matter the time of day - except the first day home. That first day and night they spend in the guest room together, adjusting themselves back into civilian life. It was a ritual that was started by Simon, that he almost insisted Soap follow with; and the Scot didn't argue. After their day of unwinding, one of them is with you always. Johnny trails after you in the kitchen, or when you're doing chores, and Simon will do the same when you're out and about, getting the weekly shop. It's endearing, in it's own way.

When it comes to night time, and sleeping arrangements, the first couple of nights after they integrate are the best, in your opinion. They both cling to you, one on each side, nuzzling their faces into your arm, or your stomach - or your back, if you're spooning one of them. Sometimes Simon will haul you to sleep on his chest in the middle of the night, and Johnny drapes his arm over the both of you, snuggling into Simon's bulky arm, already half asleep. Other times, Johnny will hug you right up against his front, as Simon hugs him from behind. Occasionally Si will mix things up, and hug you from the front, his large arms reaching over you to grab at the small of Johnny's back, and sometimes his rear.

[schoenpepper]

Chivalry Should Die!

Intro: Or, how to kill chivalry in five steps, featuring Idia Shroud!

Warnings: bad writing, awful grammar, not proofread I got lazyyyy, mentions of hentai lmao, reader is not yuu, idia highkey being a loser

A/N: This is a request from an anon. Not sure if this is actually what they wanted, but if you're reading this I hope you like it. Kinda short idk I was really busy with that Jade songfic.

Masterlist

Opening the door

As the heir of a kingdom, you've long since been trained to be respectful, etiquette and decorum seared into your flesh and carved into your bones. Perhaps with such an upbringing, Royal Sword Academy would have been for you.

But the invitation is black.

Your first day in Night Raven College is nothing too interesting. You're sorted into Ignihyde (ha!), your housewarden is a floating tablet, and some magicless folk with a rabid cat crashed orientation, starting off the year with a literal bang! You're unphased, a polite smile on your lips as you gather your things and your wits and line up to head to the dorm. You go through the mirror and up the stone stairs that led to the building in its weird mishmash of ancient architecture and blue triangles and holograms.

You, being the very kind person you are, open the door for the tablet.

It stops in mid-air.

"What...? Did you just open the door for a tablet? Lolz! Wtf you're such a weird freshie lmao. Imagine being that person, idk couldn't be me ig."

You keep on smiling.

(But the urge to punt the tablet all the way back to the hall of mirrors is strong.)

Carrying items

"Oh, let me help you, senpai."

"Huh? No, I'm okay..."

You glance at the large box, clearly heavy and stuffed to the brim by whatever was inside it and your senior slash housewarden who was doing his best to lug it up the stairs as he panted. "Are you sure? You look like you're having trouble." You watch him carry it to the second step.

"Totally fine, yep, nothing weird here, nope, nuh uh, I don't need help."

Idia avoids your eyes. The tips of his hair are turning a faint pink, and the fact that Ortho wasn't the one doing the heavy lifting was really the very first giveaway that something was wrong.

You narrow your eyes and step back.

"If you say so, Idia senpai. But why don't you just use—" he accidentally drops the box back onto the ground, watching, horrified, as its contents spilled out, "—magic to...carry it..."

"No, Y/N, don't look!"

You pick up a thick book from the pile on the ground to help him gather it all. Manga, was it? Upon accidentally reading the title, you give him the most disgusted look you could ever muster.

Idia screams until Ortho comes by to help him put his hentai manga back into the box.

Always be on time

You and Idia had agreed; 4 p.m. Not too early, not too late to work on that essay you needed to pass by tomorrow. He's a good friend and upperclassman if nothing else, so he offered to help you with the topic, which was included in his wide range of expertise. The catch is that you had to do it in his room.

You knock on the door at exactly 4.

No answer.

You take out your phone and send him a quick message. When he doesn't immediately answer, you call Ortho instead.

"Hello, Y/N!"

"Hey Ortho, do you know where Idia is? He promised to help me with an essay and he's not in his room."

"Older brother and I are in the Shaftlands!"

You smile (instead of cracking your phone into pieces). "Really? And when did you leave?"

"We left this morning because there's a comic convention that brother wanted to go to."

"I see. Thank you, Ortho."

Help getting down from a carriage

You hop down the carriage and hold out a hand to Idia. He looks at your hand weirdly, hair pink as he murmurs something you couldn't quite understand (you just know it's something annoying though). He gingerly puts his hand on yours and carefully descends from the carriage.

And by carefully, you mean, of course, that he lets go of your hand halfway and trips on the stairs before faceplanting into the dirt.

You sigh and carry him in your arms.

"Eek! Is this a limited edition SSR CG?!"

"What?"

"I mean, where are you taking me?"

You look at him dead in the eye and press on his left ankle.

"Ouch! Oh...okay..."

Paying for a date

First date! You don't know how, but you managed to convince Idia to eat out in a fancy restaurant with you (if only because you know that he will never agree to anything like this ever again). The food is nice and the ambience is tolerable even though the two of you are in a public space (you chose a private room but to Idia it's still a public space apparently). At the end of the night, the waiter puts the bill on the table and leaves.

"I'll take the—" When your hand reaches for the check, Idia grasps onto your wrist.

"No."

"No?"

He shakes his head.

"I'll pay for it because...you asked me out so...it's only fair..."

"No, it's unbecoming of a royal to not even pay for their partner's food."

He is weirdly competitive about this.

Anyway, at the end of the night, the check accidentally rips in half (the waiter wonders why) and you successfully pay for the full meal.

[sgiandubh]

In fact I have the impression that most fans in this fandom are never satisfied no matter how SC acts, they'll always find something to say. I remember how they behaved towards each other in the early days, and a lot of fans criticized SC for acting like kids and being unprofessional when they appeared at different events and I sometimes felt the same way about certain salacious things that were said to journalists and which they were also criticized for. When SC were very demonstrative with each other, fans criticized them for selling the show, and I even read comments from angry fans on their SM at the time asking them to stop behaving like that and that S wasn't respecting his co-star. Some people tend to forget that today they're no longer in their thirties, 11 years have passed, they've evolved, they've mellowed. S no longer acts like the young boy who fell under his co-star's spell, they've both moved on in their careers and in their private lives. Their goal, I think, is to go on in Hollywood and at least get some good job opportunities, and you don't need to have done advanced math to know that if you act like a kid on the red carpet, it doesn't look serious nor professional. In addition, many fans continue to say that if SC managed to represent Jamie and Claire so well it's because it's real. I'm sorry but SC and JC are two different couples. When S says he's not Jamie and when C says she's not Claire, it's true. Is C a doctor? Is S a fighter? Is S as traditional as Jamie? Are SC as co-dependent? I don't know if you've noticed, but SC have repeatedly pigeonholed this saying that JC are so fused that Claire would even tell Jamie when she went to the bathroom because he'd be worried. S, of course said recently that it's good to play scenes with other protagonists and not necessarily Claire, to which S joked and added : I need some space ok? For me JC's spotless love doesn't represent reality and unless I'm mistaken I don't think SC's daily life is all about living on love and fresh air. I agree with you, though, that there's been a certain distance between Jamie and Claire for a few seasons now so I don't know if it's because they've grown older and wiser, so they're not going to jump on each other like they did when they were young or if it's because the distance SC set up between them for the public is unconsciously transposed to JC . In any case, I think that SC, and maybe S more than C now, have set limits and that when they take part in promotions they remain professional and it's no longer Sam and Caitriona as a couple but Sam and Caitriona as co-stars. For me, fans need to stop mixing the two, also out of respect for the actors. I don't think it does them any favors to dissect their slightest behavior, and they're perfectly aware that every move they make will be observed and commented on, hence the distance S has put up with C publicly. Sorry for my long speech but when I read certain things, I think that some fans and mostly Anons need to stop throwing their own expectations and dreams of the ideal couple onto these two people (SC). On the other hand, SC have allowed some fans to find comfort in JC's love, and we can thank them for that.

Dear Long Speech Anon,

This is, indeed, very long and given my current circumstances, I had to read it twice in a row, in order to make sense of it.

I have to 1500% agree with you when you say two very important things:

'For me JC's spotless love doesn't represent reality and unless I'm mistaken I don't think SC's daily life is all about living on love and fresh air.'

With the amendment that JC's love is not exactly spotless, either. But that is Gabaldon's narrative choice, and as much as I detest her public persona (with a passion, can you tell?) she is queen on her page and of her own creatures. When she created them out of thin air, she assumed complete mastery over their destiny, even if any good writer will tell you that characters do have a life of their own - one of the most exciting mysteries of writing, indeed. Yet, it is ultimately up to the scribe to choose the words and to weave the story as they see fit. But yeah, SC not being a postcard couple is what makes them so damn endearing to me, in the first place, too.

'I think that some fans and mostly Anons need to stop throwing their own expectations and dreams of the ideal couple onto these two people (SC).'

You know, I really try to understand why this happens. There is so much tension and ugliness in this world, that you sometimes need a secret garden of sorts, don't you agree? It is harmless, it brings you solace & comfort, it's just that kind of daydreaming torpor your brain sometimes automatically switches on, in order to cope with hardship. Where I do see a problem, however, is going very vocal and public about it. And even more so, when people start to demand or believe they are owed at least an explanation (if not vindication), when These Two do not fit what definitely is to me a terrible, syrupy scenario.

[buriedpair]

Your ocs are so interesting, I found you through a repost of another yandere blog I love but now I also love yours so get ready for my weird asks.

So what if MC is a god, not a good one nor a bad one, not popular but neither unknown. That doesn't matter to them, they have unlimited power and are immortal. So what best way to use that power than go to gamble for the fun of it? They are cunning and extremely confident (for obvious reasons) and treat others with basic respect but it is apparent that they view them as ants compared to them.

You can choose which OCs find out they are a god and wich don't. How would they react? How will they act around them?

Specifically for DD, MC decides to gamble their life and loose just to fuck with them as they try to pierce their skin and it's simply impossible (or maybe not and they love too much and spare them, I still don't know what he would do if their beloved lost their life)

-🦊 anon

OOOH THIS IS COOL!!! THANK YOU !!!!

Yandere!OCs x GN God!Reader

(Pssst, TW for a mention of suicide)

Amias

Amias has always known there was something off about you. Your mannerisms are strange and he constantly feels like you're looking down on him.

When you decide to gamble your life, he's appalled. How dare you? As far as he's concerned, your life is his too. This is too much for him.

He feels his heart melt out of his chest when you lose. Time stops as he falls on his hands and knees in front of you, eyes wide and unfocused. He's not ready to have a dead darling.

But you seem confident. Was this your plan? To get rid of him, you want to die? He can't stand to watch as you make your way confidently to the execution arena.

Did he go too far? Did you really need to do this? He can be better. Please don't leave.

But the blade doesn't make even a dent as it rests against your skin. You laugh mockingly toward the crowd before announcing your immortality with a confident smile.

Amias is shattered. You did this all... just to mess with him? Oh, dear. Such a pretty little bird doesn't need to be making a big fuss. You'll be safer from yourself in his arms.

Edge

Edge always knew. He could see right through you. It just makes you even more interesting, in his eyes. The way you look down on him... He's so untouchable, usually. So for you to treat him like an insect?

It's intoxicating.

Degrade him more! Tell him how useless and disgusting he is! Fuck, you've unlocked something in him. He's never been treated so poorly before, and he's entranced.

He's under your thumb, this time. You seem to be enjoying it too, so what's the harm? There's no way you're ever losing a game, by the way. You've unlocked simp Edge.

Double Down

He has no clue. He doesn't care much about your degrading comments. He's been rejected before, and he'll still go after you no matter how many times you tell him to die.

DD absolutely REFUSES to kill you, even when you gamble your life. You'd have to get him real mad before he even considers it, which is very difficult to do. When Edge tells him he HAS to, he says he's quitting his job then. He doesn't care. He'll walk out with you on his arm (you looking less than amused) whether you like it or not.

So, now he's unemployed and attached at your hip. You're annoyed. This weird mortal is clinging to you like a weird dog with separation anxiety. He looks happy, though.

Jackpot

He's already prepared to worship you, so don't worry about being a god. Nothing will change, he adores you either way.

If you gamble your life and lose, he's broken. Forever. Doesn't matter if you don't actually die, he's shattered. You did it on purpose? Even worse. He's never going to forgive himself.

He's hardly what he used to be. He won't eat or sleep. By this point, Gambit probably hates you. Jackpot's by your side, weakly clinging to your hand whenever he can be. He doesn't show up to work, either.

You've ruined him.

Gambit

Gambit isn't sure how to feel once he finds out. He ends up with the information on accident when Edge tells him, but he doesn't know how to react. He doesn't change much, maybe gets a bit more shy around you.

He loves you regardless, don't get him wrong. He just doesn't feel worthy of being around you.

If you gamble your life and lose, he'll calmly escort you out of the casino to give you a stern lecture on the value of life. You're half asleep by the time he finishes.

He'll keep you tied up if it means he can keep you safe, no matter how immortal you are.

[aihoshiino]

Hi there! This is from an ask from quite a while ago. I sent it before but I think Tumblr ate it once again.

"Honestly Ai's relationship with like, sex and intimacy and sex in the context of a loving relationship being healing and reclaiming for her is one of those things I have so much fun writing in the context of RP and stuff but if I continued rambling about it here I would go on all day lol and this post is already so long. IN ANOTHER ASK, PERHAPS ……."

I would like to hear your thoughts and ramblings about this please 人´∀｀)

THANK YOU FOR YOUR PATIENCE ANON… I've been sitting on this ask for so long and I've had so many half finished responses to it written up kgjhhsfkg This is just one of those topics where I have so much to say every time I tried to start I got overwhelmed and didn't know where to start… BUT WE'RE SO BACK…!!!

(Also, this is basically part 2/a follow up to this post if anyone wants/needs some extra context)

Honestly Ai's relationship to sex and the role it plays in her character arc is one of the most fascinating parts of Oshi no Ko to me and I'm always really surprised that it basically never comes up in fandom discussions surrounding her? Part of that is just folks wanting to talk about/speculate more on the characters who are alive and present in the series (or have ship wars about them) but even when people DO go back and talk about her it tends to be kind of surface level or just, the worst takes you've ever seen in your life (if I never have to see another Secretly Evil Ai theory it will be too soon) but like… the sex stuff is also pretty surface level! That friction between Ai of B-Komachi's assumed obligate virginal purity and the reality of Ai Hoshino as a person who has had and desires sex basically IS the entire premise of the series. It's the core conflict around which so much of everything else revolves - it's the reason the twins have to keep quiet on their connection to her and moreover, it's the reason she dies. But honestly given how this fandom gets about sex sometimes maybe that's a blessing in disguise lol

It is SO refreshing to have a lead heroine like Ai, though - like I said, the reality of her as a person who has had Probably A Lot Of Sex is pretty much the premise of the series and at no point does the narrative ever take on a shaming tone towards her. Hell, the explicitly stated thesis of the story is that it's everyone who has a problem with this who should be ashamed. Gotanda literally says it himself - Ai's tragedy is the fault of the people who refused to accept her as the hurting, broken, dirty and impure person that the real her was.

In fact, the series is shockingly respectful of Ai and her body in general. This is very much a "the bar is in hell" moment but I'm so used to anime taking every opportunity it can get for lowbrow cumbrained fanservice that the series just being, like, normal about Ai was a breath of fresh fucking air. It's so easy to imagine an infinitely worse version of the series that uses Aqua's access to her body (as both Gorou and Aqua) to frame and leer at her in some really repulsive ways, but it literally never happens. It's one of those things the first chapter/episode does that earns it a lot of goodwill in the long run which it does honestly need lol. The initial premise of the series asks a lot of the viewer, especially given that Mushoku Tensei exists and very much does use the protagonist's plausibly deniable access to the bodies of women and girls around him for some truly putrid and degrading shit. BUT BACK TO MY ACTUAL POINT…

That pointed absence of shaming in the narrative is why it stands out to me so strongly when Ai does direct this kind of shaming language towards herself. Ai engages in a lot of negative self-talk in general because of how utterly pants her self-esteem is, but it's never quite as pointed as in these circumstances. Her death scene is honestly the best and most heartbreaking example of it - the anime trims a few slivers from it to the benefit of the scene as a whole imo, but it does retain the most important line:

But there's another part from slightly earlier on that didn't make it into the anime that equally breaks my heart:

All that Ai refutes of Ryosuke's words is his conclusion that she never cared about her fans. In other words, when Ryosuke slings slutshaming misogyny at her, Ai agrees with him.

And like… why wouldn't she? Society at large already has very strong opinions about women who have and enjoy sex and Ai is an idol - that's purity culture on Berserk Eclipse Difficulty. To make matters worse, Ai's entire life has been defined by her being denied the right to control her own body or being blamed for the way other people respond to it. Not only was Ayumi physically and emotionally abusive towards her for basically her whole life, but she also victim blamed her when her stepfather turned out to have a inappropriate interest in her. Even when she was literally a child, she was not allowed to simply exist without being subjected to other people's gaze and objectification.

It's also worth noting that the abuse Ai grew up experiencing - Ayumi's violence and neglect and living with the possibility of sexual assault at her stepfather's hands - are all things that can contribute to hypersexuality in puberty or at the very least, being prematurely sexually active and/or partaking in risky sexual behaviour and I think all of these are true for Ai as well, to varying degrees. My read has always been that the twins' father was not her first or only sexual partner (though he was her last) and I think this is something the work itself supports as well - Akane identifies Ai as having behavioral issues typical of someone who began having sex during puberty (and she does specifically say 'puberty' in Japanese, not just 'as a teen') but that this behaviour mostly tapered off by the time she was 15 and credits it by inference to Kamiki. So obviously, if the 'unbalanced behaviour' as the result of sex predates her meeting Kamiki… you know?

I also just personally find that a more compelling read of Ai for a variety of reasons - and it just sort of makes sense to me, to imagine her as this girl desperately trying to figure out how to love people, wanting to connect with people but not knowing how to do it, someone defined by the ways she contorts herself to respond to the dirty desires of the people around her… idk, it just feels Correct to me in light of everything to assume that she went through a few boyfriends before Kamiki, all relationships that went very fast, escalated to intimacy at light speed then just sort of fell apart after. And we know from what Ayumi admitted - and from some of the things Ai has said - that Ayumi absolutely was slutshaming and victim blaming Ai when she was in her care. So much of what Ayumi did to her forms the foundation of the present day Ai's self-loathing and self-image issues, so I imagine she felt a lot of prebaked guilt and shame when she did actually start having sex, especially at a young age and outside the bounds of a what society regards as an acceptable circumstance for a girl to be having sex. So add idol culture on top of all that, and…

I don't think Ai's relationship with sex is necessarily the main issue she struggles with but it does feed off and into a lot of the other things that cause her pain and being able to untangle that would represent an earthshattering breakthrough for her. This is why it's so important that Oshi no Ko never ones tries to debunk or disprove Ai's assertion that she is 'impure' or 'dirty' and why I do not think a positive character arc for her could never come from someone trying to convince her that she isn't. Because that doesn't actually disprove anything - it still frames purity and virginity as a state of grace that can be fallen from and reinforces Ai's view of herself that she only has value, that she only deserves to be treated with respect so long as she's still 'pure'. Even if you could convince her that she's 'pure', she would inevitably be stained again and hate herself all the more for it. The only way out is to break out of this method of thinking altogether, to realize that 'purity' and 'impurity' don't mean anything - and more importantly, that even though she is dirty, impure and all the rest of it, she is still capable and deserving of loving others and being loved in return.

To quote something I've said before on this topic: "Love, for Ai, is a person seeing her most wretched and unacceptable self, her self hate and avoidance and everything about her she thinks is filthy and wrong, and actively choosing to accept her as she is, warts and all. […] There's this very strong underlying current in Ai's arc of self-directed shame and self-hate in relation to her sexuality that fuels perception of herself as 'dirty' and 'impure' - all because she is a person who wants and enjoys sex. I really enjoy getting to have Ai work through that specific hangup with a partner who loves her - not from the angle of 'of course you're not dirty' but 'even if you are, I want you anyway'."

So much of what hurts Ai is other people refusing to accept 'Ai Hoshino' and even being actively repelled and repulsed by her, choosing instead to believe so fervently in the inhumanly perfect 'Ai of B-Komachi' that they convince themselves the real Ai is just a trick of the light. Sex is basically the ultimate refutation to that - it's someone saying they actively choose the dirty, broken real thing which is what Ai has desperately been searching for her entire life. It's also the inverse of the plastic. sanitized intimacy Ai sells as an idol - rather that pretty lies of love, it's dirty, physical intimacy, something she can do as much for herself as the person with her, something that can only ever be hers as Ai Hoshino because it's antithetical to everything Ai of B-Komachi is.

what i'm saying is: can this girl PLEASE get some good dick. i don't know how much of anything it would fix but it would make her calm down at least a little.

ALL JOKING ASIDE……. thank you again for your patience anon and i'm sorry this was so rambly lKNDKSCXSNDS. like i said up top, this is a topic i have a lot of thoughts on and i wanted to get them all out into this post. i hope this was interesting to read…!

[lightofraye]

Hi there!

First, thank you for being understanding that these replies may take time! I appreciate a follower/fan that is kind and respectful!

Second, to respond! Doing it in pieces to respond to each section you've said.

I wanted to weigh in on this anon's ask. But, I will preface this by saying I don’t know Jared or Gen, or Danneel or Jensen personally at all, so it’s pure speculation based off of observation.

Understood. Honestly that's all any of us can really say, unless we did know them. I speculate, you speculate, everyone speculates.

There are some guys (and gals or whoever, but I especially notice with guys), who meet someone and that’s it. They are in, hook, line and sinker. The are head over heels for their partner. Jared strikes me as one of those guys. He’s said himself that he’s not necessarily big on mushy words and things like that, which I think accounts for some of the coupley pics that Gen posts of them coming off a tad awkward. But he’s seemed settled ever since he got married, talking up being married and always mentioning Gen showing up as the best time on SPN for him (I also understsnd that this is any easy answer to give, so why not stick with it).

Oh yes. There are some people who are done, as it were, once they're married. That's it, that's their person, and no need to look elsewhere. They're loyal to a fault, loving, and dedicated. You're right, Jared strikes me as the type.

Also, I heard a rumor once that some people he worked with (I wanna say SPN cast or crew, or handlers) called Jared "very loyal," and almost kind of insinuated that he, unlike others, doesn’t mess around on his partner. In almost a condescending way. But, certainly don’t take my word on that because I can’t remember where I heard it. He also vibes as super uninterested in person (sexually, not indifferent as a person), almost like he views all fans as nice, momentary friends and that’s it. He gives no vibe of … availability. And granted, he’d be dumb to project interest on fans of all people, but it’s just a feeling I get from him (I’ve had some photo ops and meet & greets with him).

Oh how interesting! I think you're right. He may be friendly with fans, funny if the shares on Twitter are any indication, but I've never heard of him going beyond that. He maintains those boundaries, even if fans don't (I'm reminded of an op, I believe, being canceled because a fan had the audacity to grab his ass!).

I won’t belabor this point, but in contrast, Jensen vibes totally different than Jared. First, even early into his marriage, he’s made "jokes" about not liking being married. And there was that blind item about he and Danneel swinging or something. Danneel also has more cuddly chemistry with his friend Steve than Jensen. I would bet on it that Jensen and Danneel aren’t "loyal" to each other, but I think it’s more likely they have an open marriage than it being cut-and-dried cheating.

Unfortunately, yes... Jensen's never come across as someone madly in love with Danneel. In the early interviews, pre-marriage, he'd just gloss over "Yeah, we're together, been a year" and change the subject. Or one interview... hang on, let me get it.

Where when he's asked about marriage, he looked nervous and uninterested. Even though he'd been with Danneel for two and a half years by then. Most men will know they're going to marry someone within months of dating. Two and a half years and he still isn't sure? Oh boy.

As for the swinging... wow. I never heard of that one. I do remember that guy who tweeted about an orgy, got hit by Danneel to shut up or be sued, and he hastily removed the tweet. (Way to validate the claim, Danneel!)

As for Danneel and Steve, yep. They're far more like a couple than Danneel ever appeared to be with Jensen. Though I hear (from my industry expert) that it may be over between Steve and Danneel, which may be why she wanted to move far, far away. Steve probably got fed up with being the side piece instead of the main interest. But since we know Danneel won't give up Jensen's fortune without a fight....

Jensen also has a certain vibe of availability, again not to fangirls, but he seems more open on an attraction level. I don’t know how better to explain it, and again it’s just the vibes I get, so I’m not trying to say I "know" anything but just a feeling. Like, I find both J2 very attractive, and I find them funny, I even like Jared slightly more, but they literally feel different to me in person.

I think I get what you mean by vibes. I do hope, if he is having flings and one night stands, that Jensen isn't aiming for the easily available fans who are probably more than willing to have that opportunity. Is he actually having affairs? I heard of one rumor during one Bacchus event that he possibly had a one night stand with a girl there.

If he is... I can't judge him. As I mentioned, finding comfort in the quicksilver rush of an affair... sometimes that's all anyone can get in Hollywood. (And we know what kind of wife Danneel is--I doubt Jensen even seeks comfort in her arms.)

I’m going to stop now because I've veered off course and and starting to sound silly. I also get that these people are actors, so the vibe they give off could be manufactured, anyway. Anyway, thanks for taking the time to respond (if you do).

Hey, rambling is okay! That's the title of my blog! I ramble too!

Truth. We can only speculate on vibes. I had a mutual who attended a con recently and she said Jensen came across as very reserved, shy even, and uncomfortable with being in the spotlight. That was one con. Other cons, we heard of him being warm and friendly with fans, even going as far as to joking with them.

We're all very different day to day. There may be an underlying true pattern, but even shy people have times when they're comfortable in their skin to talk to others openly. Even flirty.

I appreciate your insight very much!

Thanks for the ask!

(Note to followers/fans: I do have asks on. Not anon asks. If you want your identity kept secret, ask and it's done. I only share names of those who are rude as they violated the right to respect and secrecy.

I also hope to get around to all the other asks! Life is busy!)

[stromuprisahat]

Hey,

Could you do a meta on the similarities between Labyrinth (1986) and the Shadow and Bone Trilogy? I read through that one scene (Alina and Darkling Interactions on your blog) between Alina and the Darkling after her and Mal get captured and Alina has to bargain for his life and they speak about fairness and the way the public views them both (Chapter 21 of the first book, I believe). I vaguely remembered this type of conversation from another piece of media, and saw in your tags that you attributed it to Labyrinth. Honestly wondering how much the movie influenced the trilogy, as I feel like Alina was supposed to be a Sarah Williams type of character but got her character development strangled by the narrative. Honestly wondering if this makes Mal Toby (romance aside), because Alina fought hard for this man and chose him over the ‘glamorous’ life she could have lived with the guy with powers (Darkling/Jareth). Genya might be Hoggle (works for the bad guy before becoming loyal to the protagonist). Maybe this is all a stretch?

Sorry if this is weirdly formatted. Thank you so much!

No anon! Why?!

I've watched Labyrinth once, and didn't enjoy it, so I was considering passing this on someone else, but since you've delved into details, I just HAD TO rewatch it, because I can't stand not knowing what's going on! So, I'll type as a watch and this will get veeeeeery long.

First of all- I hate those ugly-ass puppets and scenes. I find them creepy, and not in the good way. I totally don't get the ?US? obsession with them, and yes- I've hated Sesame Street, when it got imported here, and I've always hated Czech attempts at copying such production (Táhni, Františku z Fanfárie a Jůheláci taky, když už jsme u toho.).

I feel like Labyrinth is one of those movies, where fanon became widely-accepted canon, because I just can't see plenty of stuff allegedly present.

Alina and Sarah certainly have two things in common- they live in their own version of the world, and they're unbearably immature spoiled brats, even though you'd expect more from them their age considered. Yet somehow, Sarah's so unreasonably whiny, she almost makes me love Alina. Perhaps if we'd age her up a little and gave her potentially world-saving powers, she could've taken the S02show!psycho's place. They seem more alike than the book girl.

I mean... I don't like children, and I wouldn't be such a bitch to a ?one? year old...

The baby was a spoiled child and wanted everything for himself…

The baby can barely stand and certainly doesn't seem able to talk. It doesn't have mental capacity to imagine "everything", sure as hell not want it.

…and the young girl was practically a slave.

Sorry, but a scene earlier I saw her room. I watch her father respect her privacy. Her evil step mother being nothing but polite and non-threatening. I come from a loving family, and I've been keeping eye on my eight-years-younger brother since he was born. To an extent- yes, but they just want her to make sure he doesn't burn down the house on accident or something. He's even fed for fuck's sake! That's hardly slavery. And no, she doesn't get a pass as a moody teenager. This is a spoiled brat behaviour.

Sarah's straight up lying to make herself the victim. That's very Alina. Or more precisely- it's very Alina's new mommy Ol' Bags, but then again it's been said before Alina would grow into Baghra in time.

Goblin King, Goblin King, wherever you may be… …take this child of mine far away from me!

We have a better Czech ballad about children-stealing demon punishing short-tempered mother:

"Pojď si proň, ty Polednice, pojď, vem si ho, zlostníka!“ – A hle, tu kdos u světnice dvéře zlehka odmyká.

Kytice- Polednice (Karel Jaromír Erben)

“Come and get him, noon witch, come take him! I can bear no more!” And look, someone’s outside – a thumb is stealthily working the lock at the door.

A Bouquet: of Czech Folktales (transl. by Marcela Malek Sulak)

I went through it quickly, and the translation doesn't look bad, so it's available on libgen if you're interested.

Alina had her immortality and complementary powers, but what does Jareth see in Sarah is beyond me.

Sarah says she wants her brother back, but honestly- it sounds more like she doesn't want to get in trouble because of him. I don't know if it's only the acting, or if it's intentionally portrayed so, but she doesn't look like someone, who just realized they care about someone else.

It might be the whiny undertone in her voice. Irritating, if anything.

Yeah, a pissing puppet is exactly what I needed to see...

Genya is certainly prettier than Hoggle.

And doesn't piss in public.

The walls of the Labyrinth look like Terezín before reconstruction.

Sarah gets an advice and doesn't bother to delve into it. Another tiny similarity with Alina. Except Alina had her half-a-thought of doubt, and her advisor is a malevolent cunt with her own interests. The freaky worm seemed genuine in its desire to help.

Obligatory song and dancing. *shoot me, please*

The only way out of here is to try one of these doors. One of them leads to the castle at the centre of the labyrinth. And the other one leads to… …certain death.

Please, pick the death one...

"Helping hands"... every creep's wet dream...

Yeah, the evil hot accent isn't enough to make me like this villain. Fucking 80s...

Those depressive warning faces are probably the only thing I might even ~like~.

Okay, NOW he was hot.

Jareth and Sarah have the fairness conversation, when he shortens her time to punish her for her defiance. Aleksander and Alina's take place, when he wants her to face consequences of her own actions and accept responsibility. He's the wronged one there, because she didn't consider anyone or anything, when she chose to trust Baghra and ran off.

Sarah gets Hoggle to follow her by stealing his stuff. She gets the doorknockers to let her in by tricking the mumbling one into taking the unpleasant ring back into his mouth and doesn't even try to pull it out again, or knock without it attached. She's rather cruel in her thoughtlessness, isn't she?

Aleksander never shames Genya for wanting to be Alina's friend. He never blackmails her to help him. She's the one, who provokes his rightful wrath for no good reason.

I think Jareth might be what LB (sometimes) wants us to see in Aleksander. Except it's hardly what she shows by his actions, only what her characters describe.

Another difference- Aleksander doesn't only want Alina, he needs her for his plan to save his people. Jareth merely has the worst possible taste in women.

Okay, the dog making hoof-clopping noises also isn't the worst idea.

I'm kinda sorry Aleksander never tried to poison/drug Alina. That might be fun. Even the collaring couldn't really make her compliant, so he's technically nicer even in this aspect. I can see antis claiming he tried to woo her by showing her the splendor of Little Palace and giving her the centre role in Winter Fete, but the former wasn't different from Grisha in officer training, the later was the Crown's doing. He's even said to despise such events.

Sarah is a modern teenager. Alina's considered adult in her world. I got to the ball scene, where it's painfully obvious Sarah is a child in adult's clothes and make-up. I'm a bit surprised she was played by an actual teenager.

Alina starts off willing to do anything for Malyen, and ends up becoming just what he wants. Sarah starts off selfishly bullying a baby, only to turn 180° as soon as he's stolen, so excuse I'm not persuaded she means it. She doesn't manage it in next hour and half.

~ I have to face him alone. - But why? ~ Because that's the way it's done.

The logic is very Alina, but she never insists on facing the Darkling alone, except that one time she attempts murder/suicide.

Oh no, Aleksander would never wear something this teAsticleless

And no, I truly don't mean the colour.

I ask for so little. Just let me rule you… …and you can have everything that you want. Just fear me, love me, do as I say… …and I will be your slave.

Again, that's no Aleksander at all. He didn't want to rule Alina, he wanted to rule alongside her. He only tried to force her once she endangered his plans for his country and people.

He never promised her everything she's want, because the only thing she seems to want is to be left alone to live in obscurity with no expectations placed on her.

He doesn't want her to fear him and she never does. He doesn't even crave people's fear. He uses it as a tool, when there's no better option.

He doesn't mind Alina defying him, finds it attractive actually, as long as it doesn't ruin- once again- his plans for Ravka and Grisha protection.

The slave line actually reminds me of much better representation of book!Aleksander- I Wanna Be Your Slave by Måneskin.

I was pretty sure I've seen Cinema Therapy episode on Labyrinth I deeply agreed with, but can't find it, so... :(

[pommunist]

Hello!

I've been nervously hovering around your blog as you've always been a level source of info.

As of late it seems as though many people don't seem to quite grasp how different US laws can be for POC. The laws weren't made with us in mind, in fact its extremely common for laws to be thrown at us or twisted against us at all fronts when the other effected party is Anglo.

It's very easy to look at laws and assume the country they preside over would respect them entirely. But for POC that's not the case. This place isn't safe for us. It's corrupt In many ways so it's extremely important for us to be extremely careful with every step. Or we are killed. There is no other way to express the type of danger we face simply for being POC.

I am Mexican, I know that it looks bad that Q has been very silent on many fronts. But speaking even an apology could lead to the entirety of this case being blamed on him. All of it. When the people who caused the damages were on the team and not Q himself. What's worse is that if the people who did cause the damage in the first place are Anglo and have gotten their own Lawyers... they can also be let off the hook from their crimes if Q makes apology statements.

I know its awful.

But even if he contacts those effected personally and apologized personally, there is nothing stopping those individuals from speaking online about his apologies and that being used against him. It would make everyone feel better if he genuinely could apologize without risk of letting those bad actors off the hook. But here in the states it's stacked against those who bend at the knee first. Kindness will get you killed. We as POC cannot exist here safely. We just can't.

Its very easy to look at this whole case from an outside view, especially if you've never faced the American legal system. It's even harder to fathom how a country could have laws so clearly lined and yet disregard them simply based on your race. But it's very common here. I've had relatives lose homes, land, businesses, livelihoods, and lives over the laws out here not being kind to us. All it takes is for one Anglo voice and we are once again reminded how we are nothing. Our hands built these buildings, our sweat is in nearly every structures walls and floors. We clean, we cook, we are still regarded as rabble. Our native tongue isn't even seen as something respectable. It's dirty. It recieves glares and snide remarks.

I digress.

I know you can't quite understand how strong your voice is alone in this. Even now I must hide under this anonymous guise because I can't be Mexican in public. I can't speak my truth... so I am reaching out to you, to perhaps held shed some light on all of this.

Your voice is worth more than mine.

Thank you for all the work that you do. Truly.

Hello anon ! First of all I wanna say I’m sorry that I’ll going to write such a short answer when your ask was long and heartfelt. But as I’m neither Mexican nor from the US I don’t have much to add to what you just said. Though I am aware, at least to a certain extent how bad the xenophobia against mexicans can be over there, and I don’t wish for Quackity or anyone else to suffers the consequences of it.

Also don’t even worry about coming here as an anon, I don’t mind and your safety comes first anyway. My voice isn’t worth any more than yours is, I’m just glad if I can help share your thoughts on this situation.

[lokeanwelcomingcommittee]

hi! This is sort of a weird ask, and I get it if you can’t/don’t want to answer, but:

ive been drawn towards Norse polytheism for a while now, but up until recently I just read the eddas and called myself a fan. But a little bit ago something? Clicked? And now I’m having this mini internal battle of wanting to become lokean and also the problem that because of past religious trauma (thank you, Catholic Church!) I am unable to fully believe in the presence/existence of any deity. It’s hard for me to, if I get past that, trust them, as well. And so I ask you this: in your opinion, can I still practice Norse paganism even though a part of myself doesn’t believe? I know that it’s a personal thing, and that it’s really up to me, but do you think it’s still valid, even though I’m still in doubt of the gods’ existence?

I do feel a connection with Loki, and part of me wants to believe. But I don’t know it I can.

-a conflicted anon

Hi Nonny,

The only active mod has been on hiatus for personal reasons, but since you've sent this a couple times now and apparently haven't been able to find other community in the interim, I'll throw out a quick response. Again, I would urge you to find other folks to bounce this stuff off of, both because there are people out there with way more spoons than me atm and because lots of varied perspectives are good. Pagans are, for the most part, very anti-proselytization and would not try to pressure you into a path you weren't sure about, and Norse paganism doesn't have the equivalent of Christian hell in the sense that you don't get eternally punished for believing the wrong thing.

So, on that note, Norse paganism focuses way more on action than belief. I know multiple Heathens who identify as atheistic, and I deeply respect them and their contributions. I see myself as agnostic, personally. I worship regularly, even though the blog is quiet, but I can't know and don't much care if these gods exist outside of human imagination.

For me, it's not about being right about metaphysical things that can never be empirically proven. It's a framework for finding meaning. It's a framework to establish personal ethics for interacting with others and stewarding the planet we live on. It's an outlet to express joy and awe at what life has to offer. It's a way to find like-minded people. Maybe the gods are out there, maybe they're just an extension of us, but regardless, all of the above has a real, material impact on the world in the way we live our lives.

If you can believe in that, then that's justification enough to explore it. If it's not for you, you can always stop. I hope you find contentment on your journey, wherever it may lead.

-Mod E

[pomplalamoose]

Can I request what canon rotj Luke and your Dilf!AU Luke would do if you were stressed to the point of tears? Like how he would comfort you if it finally all snapped and you just broke down in front of him?

YES YOU CAN ANON you're always welcome here! I adore every single person sending in asks, so as always, thank you so much🩵🩵

(and especially for requesting something Dilf!Luke related, I love thinking about my unstable mess of a man)

• as the one affected, it has become hard to ignore your body's signs of stress and yet you choose to suppress most of it in order to keep going

• possibly even yourself are unaware of how badly you're really doing and how closely you've been teetering on the edge for quite a while now

• after all, as you keep telling yourself, you'll always have enough time to regain strengths later; it worked before and has to now

• maybe you don't want the Luke Skywalker to think of you as weak or unable to keep up

• maybe you are afraid to divert attention from any, in your mind, more important issues at hand

• maybe you want to be there for him as a friend and/or partner, want to be the strong shoulder to lean on instead of breaking down when he could need you the most

• maybe you're ashamed of your problems, think of them as too small, too unworthy to bother someone else with them

• maybe this is how you were raised and, despite being an adult now, the old beliefs remain

Return of the Jedi!Luke

• Luke, caring and attentive, always senses when and how much you're set on edge though, no matter the state of your current relationship

• so it's likely he'll take notice of how bad you're doing no matter how much effort you put into hiding

• that man reads you like a book and there isn't much you can do about it

• still he wonders, worries, about what it is that troubles you so; he wants to help but isn't sure what to do, if you'd even want him or anyone else to interfere

• he could easily read your mind, listen in on your thoughts, but refuses to do so

• there is a reason for your withdrawn behavior and he respects that

• he wants to be worthy of your trust

• so he'd decide to keep an eye on you nevertheless, somehow always present to "coincidentally" swoop in to improve your situation

• your favorite tea has run out? - oooh look how funny, he found one last little bag in his drawer and was just about to drink it; would you like to have it instead?

• you're desperately searching for your set of keys/your communicator/an accessory/basically anything? - look what he found lying around!

• if he knows or suspects you have a crush on him prior to your relationship he'd smile or acknowledge you with a kind nod whenever your paths cross, deeply enjoying the way it makes your eyes shine and cause your whole demeanor to lighten up, no matter how briefly

• when you finally break down in front of him, he'd be somewhat caught off guard despite having sensed it coming

• and though he manages to remain calm to not upset you any further he's somewhat distraught himself

• similarly to you he didn't expect it to be THAT bad

• he'd approach you carefully, ask if you'd rather be left alone, secretly being very relieved when you shake your head no

• he'd hate to leave you behind without anyone to look out for you

• depending on where the two of you are he'd either make sure no one will walk in or carefully steer you somewhere quiet, all the while talking to you in a soothing tone

• he'd sit you down and stay close, waiting, taking his time to calmly assess the situation and your needs

• if you're unable to speak in full sentences and/or have trouble breathing he'd gently walk you through a row of calming exercises until you're able to answer some simple yes-or-no-questions

• are you comfortable with being touched right now?

• is his hand resting on your back okay?

• would being held help?

• do you want him to continue talking?

• or do you wish to talk?

• would you like to lay down?

• or maybe go for a walk?

• do you want to try his favorite warm beverage?

• in the end it's Luke's goal to make you feel as safe and secure with him as possible and thus would adjust his behavior and your surroundings according to your reactions

• to him it doesn't matter what's going on either; cry, rant or be silent as long as you need to be if only it serves to make you feel better

• despite his burning curiosity he'd never pry or put any kind of pressure on you

• he's patient and understands that some things are better left unspoken until the time is right

• still he makes sure you know you'll always have someone to talk to as long as he's around

Modern day AU Dilf!Luke

• very much to his dismay, this version of Luke doesn't have a connection to the Force and, even worse, lacks the ability to communicate properly

• still he'd sense something is wrong as soon as your behavior changes, no matter how minimal, no matter how good you are at hiding your struggles

• because despite everything he's a very sensitive man, and not as easily fooled as others, especially not when it comes to you

• he sees the faintest hint of dark circles under your eyes, or the way you slouch over dinner just a little more than usual and knows

• at first he'd tell himself not to read too much into it; no need to overreact because you possibly had one bad night of sleep

• but when your constitution doesn't better, in fact, only seems to worsen over time, his forced calm vanishes

• he'd be so worried but then, slowly but surely, he'd wonder why you didn't confide in him

• is he not approachable enough?

• does he not give you enough sense of security?

• did he fail to be convincing when he promised to take care of anything that might stress you out?

• don't you trust him?

• his mind would be racing; there has to be a reason, a good reason, for your silence

• otherwise you would tell him, wouldn't you?

• in his panic he quickly jumps to the worst possible conclusion he's able to come up with:

• you don't love him anymore, are unhappy with how things are and only haven't told him so because you didn't yet figure out how to

• oh if only he were given the opportunity to take a look inside that pretty head of yours, he would do so immediately

• to make things worse he might unconsciously start to distance himself from you in order to protect his feelings

• because what else is he supposed to do?

• how could he ever change your mind when he clearly seems to have messed up?

• once you can't take the stress anymore, when everything just gets too much and you break down in front of him, he'd act on instinct

• you don't cry around him often, not like this, so accordingly all of his alarm bells are going off like crazy, his fear of loosing you at an all-time high as he sees it basically confirmed

• he'd be by your side as fast as the first tear appears, wiping it away as he tightly wraps his arms around you

• he can't be sure if it it's the last time he gets to hold you, so he'd try to make the most of it, try to put all of his devotion and love for you in every single one of his touches as he'd pick you up and sit the both of you down on the sofa

• either with you in his lap or him above you he'd ignore his own urge to cry as he covers you in kisses from head to toe, positively smothering you, stopping only to whisper ragged, breathless pleas into your ear

• while not exactly doing anything to calm you down, the confusion definitely serves to distract you enough to clear your head

• at least for the amount of time you need to get Luke to look at you and to ask what the hell he's even talking about

• "You're not leaving me?" he'd ask, eyeing you like a kicked puppy

• you're absolutely not and he's so relieved, so overjoyed, barely able to contain himself, that he nearly forgets you were crying in the first place

• he'd remember it quickly enough though and forbid you from getting up for the rest of the day

• work? Called off

• your appointments? Cancelled

• don't you dare to start any chores around the house

• be good and do as he tells you: sit there and look pretty and let him take care of you

• but first, tell him what bothers you so

• please

• he'll get you anything, do anything, you need to make you feel better

[sorcerous-caress]

Don't worry I'm definitely not rushing!! There's so much content and I'm still learning- stuff like wizards and warlocks scare me since they seem so complicated so I've been using Karlach and Lazael since they seem more straight forward for now. Astarion is definitely my favorite playstyle though- I've always loved Ninjas so being able to do 2 bonus actions is...*so* nice! Yeah- I can't say I'm surprised at the fixation 😅

Admittedly, I do absolutely adore him and am looking forward to writing for him; already have a fic in progress in fact- but I've seen a very similar thing happen to another character where he's either made entirely negative and insane or entirely positive and has to be "protected" when it's really a mix of both. Some parts of fandom I think are just like that 😅 Glad I found here and other more indie blogs who focus on npcs and niches though too so I get a wider variety!!

I'm so weak to being patronized and being talked to all condescending like and I just imagine this mean, bully male drow just targeting this crybaby Human in camp. They try to act all tough, but the drow just knows they're being a brat so he'll put them in their place. He's so damn *mean*- and he only gets worse when they run to their camp mates for help, or to hide. He steals your diary, telling you to "come get it" in a note he leaves them and they have no choice but to reluctantly leave their camp mates tent to go into the forest. It's dark- and even with their weapons, the Human's hypervigilant- but they still get taken off guard. Pulled back against a tree by their fragile little throat. Reading their most personal thoughts to blackmail them- ugh. Their crush in camp- how desperate they are, maybe even their secret kinks and desires? Gods, I'm so weak.

Oh God- or imagine a Human who's *scared* of the dark? Or a Drow who makes them scared of the dark by constantly frightening them during it? The predator/prey dynamic? *Please*. Also, self-indulgent(like all this *isn't* lmao-) because I'm sick atm and can't take large pills but Drow watching a Human work themself up to taking the medicine and just- taking it himself and then kissing them to force it in their mouth, not breaking it till they swallow, purple fingers dragging down their throat to make them shiver and raise thier shoulders. You've ruined me author. I can't do this. 😭 When I transfer my side blog to my new main blog I may have to write something for this dynamic because of you. So glad I could make your day a little brighter like you do ours lovely! Thank you for all that you do, as always! Sorry this is so long- the writer inspiration hit out of nowhere lol ❤️ -S

Fuck yeah ninja Astarion, let's fucking go!

That sounds wonderful anon, feel free to share your fic whenever you're finished <3 I'm sure it will be amazing.

And god yes, you get it, the whole human kink thing. Especially how condcending the elves would be with it, fuck especially the drows who already think they're above other elves.

Like maybe the other species keep their restraints a bit while in the party with the human, as much as their mind runs wild, they attempt to show some decorum and dignity. Only act like the perverts they are when the human isn't watching.

But once the male drow joins them? He's picking on the pathetic little human on his first day. Pulling and picking at your clothes, asking if humans really just walk around wearing slutty clothes all day?

He probably gets off on tormenting you, reminding you how he's hundreds of years older than you so you should shush your pretty little mouth and let him do what he wants, afterall aren't you humans so obsessed with showing respect for age? Then show him the respect he deserves whenever he pulls you on his lap, out of the blue and without a care to whoever is watching.

It's like second nature to him how casually he demeans your entire being, everything you ever hoped to achieved he probably has already, every place you wanted to see or travel to he has already seen, most historical events you read about he has lived through himself.

So in every way, he tells you that he clearly better than you. So don't go whining whenever he steals your diary and taunts you with all of your embarrassing secrets, or whenever he takes something precious from you and make you beg for him to give it back.

He teaches you some words in drow elvish, excepts they're completely not what he told you they meant. Watching you confidently call yourself his personal slut when you thought you were saying something else. Refuses to give you his name, makes you use all of these titles that are so humiliating to yell outloud midbattle, but he won't help you if you don't use them so poor you.

[starlightiing]

Hi again! Thank you for your in depth answer about Esteban yesterday, I appreciate it! I've fallen down a rabbit hole of watching videos and interviews, thank you for also linking a few! It has definitely been an interesting ride so far!

What I've seen and comes shining through from your answer as well, in regards of his relationship with his parents, is a very determined but also humble appearing man as a character. From the public point of view that we have, it's very fascinating to see how Esteban seems to genuinely care about fans, workers and those that even dislike him. I have seen that clip you talk about with the person meeting him, telling him they didn't like him before and him going to question it in this "but why??" way of rooting us back in reality of some sort, like he's aware of how he's perceived, accepted it (or not necessarily accepted it - I have read his instagram statement about the recent hate, which is also led me to questioning stuff again) and just tries to make the best of his shot at the game that is f1.

I've never did as much of a deep dive on him, just always accepting he's kind of there ... you know.

I guess it's also an indication his character as a whole that he continued being friends with Stroll after being replaced by him, I had never really thought about that but it does make me think Esteban is holding people dear to his heart in a somewhat unconditional way. I think (atp I've seen a whole lot, my word) I've seen him say something along the lines of "there is the racing and there is our friendship" which is interesting because he is often portrayed, imo, as someone that just stubbornly and uncaringly pushes ahead, fuelled by his background that surprisingly often gets told in a negative tone. But this is another example of him actually being able to emotionally separate his career low from his friendship.

Oh god I feel like I'm writing a whole essay in your inbox, I better wrap this up...

Thank you again, you really started a deep dive evening for me yesterday! There's much to consider still but he's made himself more likeable to me with the gentle help of your words too.

Oh, anon, this message really warms my heart! I am so happy to hear that you've been able to find some positives about him and some reasons to potentially like him in the future. Again, if you don't end up liking him, that's okay. At least you gave him a chance instead of just following the pack. Huge kudos to you for that!

Yes, his friendship with Lance is a huge deal considering he lost his seat to him simply because of money and Lance's dad buying the team, therefore the spot. He's made his comments about it but he never held it against Lance which is pretty incredible. I think he's a big boy who realizes what the world of F1 really is: cold, heartless, strictly business. And he's always respected that even though he has worked through so much to get here and stay here.

There was a quote from him I saw recently where he talked about crying when he lost that seat and it being the lowest point in his career, but now that he's been back in F1 he is "always happy" because he is just grateful to be here. That's why he is always smiling, so he says 😊

He also very frequently talks about all drivers deserving respect because of what they go through to be doing this. The training, the pleasures they give up, the privacy they give up, the pressure, everything they deal with in the car, ect. Regardless of how he feels about any of them personally, he begs everyone to respect them all at the very least for what they do.

People do see his style of racing and label him as aggressive, stubborn, an asshole, ect. Some people even take it as far as ripping apart his personal character and then even getting quite racist which is just disgusting. It's not surprising, but it's very disappointing. The sort of attacks he gets are incredibly unwarranted and disgusting and not a single person in this world ever stands up for him. He hardly ever stands up for himself. Like, almost never. The statement post Monaco was more than I thought we would get from him to defend himself which means he got worse shit than even I saw. He usually just let's people think what they think and keep on going, but it was bad enough that it struck his heart and he couldn't, and it really broke my heart and made me so sick for him.

Esteban is very lovely to his fans. One of the best on the whole grid imo. He's also a fucking nerd. He has yapping disease, he bounces on his feet when he's excited or in anticipation. He loves Spiderman and Marvel (and killed it on a grill the grid sort of challenge recently that asked him all Marvel questions). Hes very different in the car vs out of the car. But in so many ways he is also the same. I think his heart is very prominent in everything he does.

Again, he is definitely not perfect, but nobody is. I'm glad you've been enjoying your deep dive and I would love to hear from you again in the future as you continue down! It's lovely to hear your insight and always feel free to share videos and such with me as well. I personally love the video of him and Pierre eating the British snacks, I think it puts both of them in a really silly, sweet light and it makes my heart happy. I would highly recommend that one as well.

Actually, here you go! I hope you enjoy and hope to hear from you soon. Thank you so much for following up!!! 🩷 🩷

https://youtu.be/MraYxamdByM?si=Io9UScgBeWeiNEw1

[k-s-morgan]

I heard news about a snowstorm in Ukraine that caused several deaths, and I was so worried for you. Are you okay, Morgan? Is your family safe? Are things calming down there? I keep checking for news that announces the end of this war, and it's disheartening to see that it never arrives. I can't imagine what it must be like to live through this. Is there anything we can do for you? Do you need somewhere to take refuge outside the country? Is the money you receive from your job sufficient for you and your family to live comfortably? I always check the updates you post, and it's admirable that these horrible events haven't changed the golden heart you have, you are a wonderful person and you don't deserve any of what is happening, I hate that I can't do anything to stop it this war, but whatever I can do for you I will.

please be safe, please keep fighting.

Another ask: Hey, I hope you're just busy but please give us some sign that you're okay, please. I'm worried

Another ask: Katrin, you are okay??

Another ask: You okay??

Another ask: How are you going?? Is everything already? Please asnwer 😭

----------------------------

Hi! Thank you all, you wonderful anons (and my lovely first anon, I'll respond to your questions further down in this reply). I'm so touched that you've been thinking about me! There was indeed a serious snowstorm that caused some deaths, but I'm fine: honestly, I'm such a hopeless stay-at-home introvert that I usually leave only for short trips to the shop and to feed pigeons & stray cats. So I meet most storms safely tucked in my bed))

It's all right now, though everything is still covered in snow. If there is snow where you are, too, and you see miserable pigeons or other birds around, please feed them if possible! They rely on us entirely during winters. Some grain would be ideal.

I was hoping to make a monthly post, but my tight work schedule + migraines ruined these plans, so I decided to give up on it. Russians haven't attacked my city again yet after that the most massive attack by drones. I'm pretty sure it is coming, though, especially on holidays. They tried to tun our last New Year into hell on purpose by sending missiles during the day, killing people, and then sending drones at night. I worry that this year might be even worse, but I've been teaching myself to live in the present and enjoy peace while I still have it, so I manage to keep my fears at bay.

First anon, thank you so much for your kindness! I have places where I could go and stay beyond Ukraine, but for the next year at the least, I intend to keep holding on because I can't leave without my family (and the bigger half of my family is not allowed to leave legally yet). If Russian attacks get completely unbearable, I might go to Poland to my relatives for a month or two just to unwind and to repair my sanity a bit.

As for the money, I'm doing more or less okay, and people who keep supporting me on Patreon help me to stay afloat. I have some debts, but they are under control - I owe the bank $300, which is 1/3 of my monthly salary, so I'm capable of paying it back little by little. The situation is not ideal, but nothing to worry about.

Like many Ukrainians at the moment, I feel burned out regarding the war. There are many amazing, kind people in this world, and our soldiers are absolute heroes who deserve all respect in the world, but those with power to make decisions like money way too much. It's an unfortunate fact that has been making people all over the world suffer generations after generations. Many US, European, and Chinese companies continue to help Russia manufacture its missiles and other things they use to kill us. The help Ukraine gets is enough to let us survive but not enough to let us win. Those who can make money on it eagerly grab the chance, including some members of our own government. I'd like to be optimistic, but I really don't see a scenario that would end with justice. It's very difficult to accept the fact that terrorists and murderers won't be punished - on the contrary, many of them will continue to live in luxury, unable to imagine what an explosion even sounds like, until the day they die. But like I said before, it is what it is. The world is full of bitter examples like this.

Thank you for being with me and supporting me, reading my stories and sending your asks. I hope to end this month with posting two chapters for my two stories. My second job comes to an end December 15, and hopefully, I'll get a chance to really dive into writing after this!