#tf billy

[sweetpeaches666]

I find the kids' reactions to Starscream's death in the original Japanese dub to be more impactful than in the English dub. There are no words, but just the incredible music playing while the kids all silently grieve for Starscream.

Sometimes, it's better to show than tell.

[rose-of-the-grave]

Reader: breaks up with any of my fictional crushes

Me: u dumb bitch😡 how could you do this to me???

[moonlightcycle571]

Marvel making familiars for his loved ones

So I was thinking about Tawky Tawny (again). The thing about him is that he got so many different backstories or explanations on what he might be, but a common enough theme that we see is that he is a stuffed toy when he wants to be.

So here me out.

Tawky Tawny is Billy’s familiar and helps him adjust to his magic when he wants to use it in his small form. He was originally a toy given to Billy by his parents and later given life by The Wizard.

It came with more benefits. Tawny would eat his nightmares, be able to teleport to Billy’s location so that he could never get stolen or lost, protect Billy by going into his tiger form and all around be a constant warmth on his life.

So imagine Billy doing the same as The Wizard.

A lot of his friends aren’t magic users and don’t have the same magical protection he does, so maybe he gives them some enchanted clothing or pendants. A semi familiar (because without magic you can’t make a magical familiar pact with a living animal) where he just makes them familiars.

He would create stuffed animals, and weave in some magic to make them sentient. Maybe it would start with younger heroes, but when he realises his coworkers in the JL need the help as well, he absolutely would make some for them. They, like Tawny prefer to stay in stuffed toy mode, but will sometimes would want to stretch their paws and go into animal form once they feel like they are in a suitable environment.

Just picture it.

It all started with Raven, and the constant stress she might feel with having to constantly guard over Trigon. She can’t have a familiar because most creatures would suffer if give a link to her because her magic is not compatible like that. Captain Marvel decided to make her a companion. He makes her a little leopard wearing an elegant pink suit with a little top hat.

Raven: Is that a plush?

Cap: I heard you have trouble sleeping, so I got you a friend. I haven’t given them a name or pronouns, so that’s up to you.

Raven: … why

Cap: Trust me, they are for nightmares! Tawny *holds up his tiger plush* tells me they are fun to hunt and makes quite the sweet treat.

Raven: *holding the handmade gift* thank you 🥺

Cue shenanigans where she thinks he’s just trying to be a great den mother, and is a tad naive thinking stuffed animals actually work. Not that she isn’t holding little Ebony Darkness every night and is getting the best sleep she has in years.

Another thing to add is that insomnia and PTSD is a common sight within the caped community. And of course Billy notices that. So, after seeing more and more positive results of his plushies, he makes more and more. It becomes a trend. Younger heroes receive a small teddy of an animal and proceed to get attached to it almost immediately.

Nightwing almost cried when he got an elephant wearing a bow tie . Cap said that he seemed like the type to like them. Now Dick has given Zitka a little sibling to sleep at night with. But then that plush becomes fond of Zitka and gave the og elephant plush sentience.

Starfire absolutely adores her shrimp plush. Said something about being able to see colours together. Wally doesn’t know what to think about getting a turtle, but quickly gets attached, even putting little designs in the shell.

Jason also likes to put in patterns in his sting-ray, which Roy doesn’t get cause he thinks his jelly fish is perfect just the way she is. Lian gets a smaller jellyfish, which makes her happy because all the Outlaws get a sea animal.

All the members of YJ, even the retired ones, get a reindeer. They suspect he knows.

It gets back to the JL that Caps giving stuffed toys to their protoges.

Flash: Hey, Cap, how come we don’t get any stuffed animals?

Captain, exited his work is wanted: You want one!!!

Flash, can’t say no to that face: … yes I do

He gets all exited and makes plushies for all of his coworkers, that he pours a bit of extra magic in his work.

CM, fidgeting infringe if the door:

Batman: what is it Captain

CM: I made you something but then I realised that you wouldn’t really want it but then it could be cool if you did and I didn’t want to overthink-

Batman, stopping Billy’s rant: go ahead

CM, hands him a plush snake wearing spectacles: I thought you would like them. I haven’t named them so that’s up to you

Batman, not knowing where to go from here: … is the name important

CM, offended: It’s the MOST important

Batman sighs and keeps the snake. Naturally he does a billion different tests but finds it’s a snake plush. One that’s handmade. That must have taken a lot of time and effort. Batman keeps George Snaking. No he will not admit that having the snake wrapped around his shoulders is soothing.

And it just spirals from there. Hal gets a Sparrow in a poncho, Plastic man gets a kangaroo wearing the nicest boots, Wonder Woman gets a duck in a fancy dress, Aquaman gets a penguin in swim shorts, J’onn gets a lion in a toga … Guy gets a clown fish.

It has no rhyme or reason. The only common thread is that it’s an animal with some sort of clothing. Cap just says that of course they have clothing, they are distinguished and perfectly civilised individuals.

It all come to a head when the League faces some threat, and they are weakened, only for their plushies to fucking teleport and turn into massive version of their respective animals and saves the day.

Hawkwoman, starring at her bear: I- Mrs Snuggles?

Mrs Snuggles: *shrugs*

Shayera: … I could have been getting bear hugs this whole time

Guy: *looks down* Flippers?

Flippers: *flops on the floor*

Guy: ….

Guy: how come the others get bigger version of their animals

The League of Superpets aren’t that worried about competition. They tried to recruit the plush’s, but turns out they are just lazy. Like, they will beat a butch if necessary, but won’t actively go looking for crime to solve. They act more of a home défense.

The only ones who knew about the sentient plushies where Ma and Pa Kent (their Octopus is extent helpful around the farm), Alfred Pennyworth (he’s the one who actually requested hamsters to help keep the manor clean and keep an eye on his family) and Damian who’s instinct immediacy told him his fennec fox is alive.

Oracle got a capybara. The Capybara is the most powerful one Billy has made, second to Tawny. I don’t make the rules.

Constantine is the only one who never got one. Billy is still salty about him trying to steal his powers. Plus he would prolly sell it.

[harveylikestoart]

Don’t let your friends cut your hair unless they’re professionals

[demonparamour]

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6

Tags: @sucker-for-emily-prentiss

[harringroveera]

*5 minutes later* Steve: …is typing…

Billy: Oh hell

[neoymm]

mirror

man in the mirror :o

[square-with-a-mouth]

Going to a chiropractor rq ✌️😘

Im so danny core rn⤴️

[k-wame]

The Kissing Booth Press

[incorrect-agatha]

The Coven Gift Exchange

Agatha (from Lilia) - a pack of batteries, one of those hand crank flashlights, and a generator (a joke gift because of Agatha’s quest for “power”)

Alice (from Billy) - some cozy Animal Crossing style games to chill out with when life gets too hectic and/or when she can’t go out to do the activities she wants for whatever reason (Alice and Billy sometimes play together on such games too, such as having a multiplayer Stardew Valley save, visiting each other’s towns/islands in Animal Crossing, and hanging out together in Disney Dreamlight Valley)

Billy (from Agatha) - Tommy’s green jacket that somehow ended up in her house during the events of the Hex (no one knows why it didn’t disappear with everything else and Agatha claims she only gave it to Billy because she’s trying to clean up her house)

Jen (from Rio) - some rare potions ingredients Jen wanted that she’s randomly mentioned in conversations (Rio, being the Green Witch, was easily able to find such plants, herbs, and other sorts of things that few mortals would be able to acquire)

Lilia (from Jen) - a watch that not only tells the hour and minutes, but the day, month, and year so when Lilia gets stuck in the future she can get her bearings faster by knowing when she is (while it doesn’t help when she gets stuck in the past since she didn’t have the watch then, it still gives Lilia some peace of mind that she can navigate the future a little easier now and is very touched that Jen found such a thoughtful gift)

Rio (from Alice) - a DVD of Grumpy Cat’s Worst Christmas Ever since the actress who voices Grumpy Cat in the movie looks and sounds an awful lot like Rio and the rest of The Coven teases her about it to no end (Rio pretends to be annoyed, but actually loves being associated with Grumpy Cat as she finds the meme hilarious)

Bonus:

Rio finally gets Alice that pack of Advil she asked for on the Road.

[windybluebelles]

Trans Billy Batson getting his first period while on the streets and not knowing who to call.

Fic WIP:

He can’t call Mary,

No way- Nu Uh- Not a single chance

Firstly, Mary might not have even gotten hers yet and even if she has how could she help him? They’re both just kids, she can’t rush out at the ass crack of dawn to bring him some-IDK! Pads or something! She might as-well be wearing a massive sigh that tells her parents -“BILLY IS A GIRL”- and then the Bromfields will hate him and he’ll never see his sister again and their basically the only family he has and-

Yeah not telling Mary.

Wonder Woman says their family, could he ask her? Oh how would that go-

“Hey, yeah Yknow your Co worker? Yeah, the full grown man- hmmm well he’s actually a teenage girl whos bleeding out in an abandoned apartment. Yeahhhh help?”

No, that’s how he loses his job. Diana doesn’t want to be friends with a homeless kid. Much less one who lied about basically everything about himself.

Freddie is a boy

Mr Morris is a man and his boss

He doesn’t know Dinah that well

Anyone on Young Justice will have to tell their guardian

Zatanna-

Well, Zatanna could work.

They’ve talked quite a bit and Billy would say they’re quite close.

AND,

She should already know his age, surely she’d be able to recognise how new his magic is, how inexperienced he is at using it. Right?

Yeahhhh, she’s also able to be contacted by his league communicator so he won’t have to dig out his shitty old phone.

He scrolls down till he finds her number,

He dials,

“Hey Z-“ His high pitched voice echo’s down the line, too late to go back now

What could go wrong?

[sweetpeaches666]

(Sandstorm/Cyclonus getting ready to throw the kids over a cliff.)

Sandstorm/Cyclonus: All righty, kids. Here's the end to your short, little lives.

Carlos: Wait! Wait, wait! Is this really what you wanna be doing with your life? Tossing kids off cliffs?

Sandstorm/Cyclouns: Actually, yes. It's been my dream since I was a little mech.

The kids: ...

Sandstorm/Cyclouns: I was a strange sparkling.

[spidermans-l-o-v-e-r]

Ketchup Bottle

Pairing: Charlie Swan x agegap!Reader

Word count: 4.8k

Notes: Bruh where tf did this come from??? Like?? What do EYE mean Charlie Swan x Reader??

P.S this title is so funny

1

Charlie stares at the menu in front of him, his fingers pursing his lips. If he’s gonna be stood up, he might as well treat himself. 

Bella had been nagging him to “get back out there” recently.

“Mom is happy… I am… I just want you to be too.” 

She knew he didn’t really need anything, but she wasn’t stupid, she knew that he was definitely not doing great on his own. So she set him up on a blind date, one of Alice’s friends that Alice promised was exactly what Charlie needed.

He should have known better than to trust her…. Alright, that wasn’t nice, if he was going to trust any Cullen it was her. 

And maybe like, Emmett. 

He orders himself a nice steak and is just about to hand over the menu when a girl walks in absolutely drenched from head to toe. She looks like she’d fallen into the freaking ocean. He’s about to stand up and figure out what’s going on when the hostess starts walking toward him. 

“I can handle it from here” He sighs, getting up now and putting his hands on his hips. 

“You wanna talk in back? Maybe get you into something dry?” 

“T-that would be nice” 

He leads her back to where they busy to find her something warm. A chair is brought over next to the giant ovens and she sits gingerly on it, trying not to lean too close to them, the owner promises to come back with something dry. 

“You wanna tell me your name? And maybe about what happened?” He’s in cop mode as he puts his coat around her shoulders and she snuggles down into it. He removes a little leaf from her hair and flicks it away. 

She’s pretty, he notices. A young thing compared to him, dressed nicely, must have had a date.

“I’m Y/N” Your teeth chatter with each word and he has you scoot a little closer to the oven while rubbing your arms. He crouches down to get a good look at you, you’re not in too bad of shape… a few bruises here and there, little scrapes but you seem to be intact. 

“Alright Y/N, you able to tell me what happened?” 

“Nothing that would involve the Sheriff” you sigh “It was just an accident” 

“That would be something to involve a Sheriff with” He raises an eyebrow and you shift uneasily. He reaches out, taking your hand a bit awkwardly, and rubs the back of it, trying to warm you up, and hopefully soften you a bit in the process.

“My phone died” You mumble and he nods understandingly. 

“Alright, I got a phone you can borrow… and?” 

“I got rear-ended-“ you tug at the roots of your hair nervously and he holds your hand tighter, trying to calm you down “And- and they literally sped off?? It wouldn’t start after that and I had to leave my car on the side of the road and start walking and then it freakin’ started raining-“

“Were you able to get a plate number?” He asks it calmly, hoping to soothe you a bit and it seems to work as you sigh and let your head fall back 

“Man you bet I did… and I had a date tonight!! He probably thinks I stood him up!!!” 

He reaches into his pocket for his phone and unlocks it before handing it over. “How late are you? Maybe I can get you a police escort”

You giggle a little at his joke and start dialing the number you’d learned by heart from the little piece of paper your friend had given you. 

“We were supposed to meet here at around 7? And it’s literally 8:30 now… I’m sure he’s gone.” The number goes straight to busy and you pout.

“Do you know what he looks like?” 

“No…blind date. I’m not from around here” You try dialing again, but it goes right to busy. “But I know his name!” 

“What is it? Maybe I can help ya find him.” 

“Charlie Swan?” 

Charlie stares at the floor as you change into some clean pajama pants and pull a shirt over your head. He didn’t say anything about the fact that you were his date apparently… he just took you home with him because honestly he didn’t really know where else to take you. He bought you dinner there, had it boxed up so you could leave together-

Seriously? You?

He couldn’t deny you were pretty, your hair was so soft and bouncy now that it was somewhat dry, and you so weren’t lying when you said you weren’t from around here, your skin was too sun-kissed to have been from around here. 

Still… 

What the hell were those two thinking? And okay a better question, one he wasn’t even sure he wanted the answer to. 

You were friends with Alice? 

Did that mean…? 

“Thanks again” You sigh as you come out of the bedroom, Bella’s old room, while using a towel to scrunch your hair. He’d all but shoved you into the bathroom for a hot shower while he picked out a few things of Bella’s for you to wear. He called her to make sure it was cool and he heard Emmett screaming some less than great ideas for clothing. 

“Yeah it’s no problem…kinda my job” He watches you plop down at the kitchen table and rub your hands together while laughing evilly before opening the takeout container in front of you. He smirks a little at that while grabbing a couple beers from the fridge.

“Figure maybe we can get your car tomorrow? Tow it in… I know a guy who can fix it for ya” 

He sits next to you, watching you eat. You’re eating human food, but didn’t he hear that they did that anyway? To fit in? 

“Penny for your thoughts?” You pop a fry in your mouth and he shrugs, slouching in his chair a little and tilting his head back.

“It’s nothin'” He shrugs and sits up again, grabbing the mail from the table and perusing distractedly. “What about you huh? You doin any better?” 

“Yeah” You shrug back “I guess” 

“You guess?” He sets the paper down and waits for you to chew your burger before grabbing your beer

“It’s stupid”

“Oh, I doubt that” he crosses his arms over his chest, giving you his full attention and you look down at your box for a second.

“He didn’t call… to see if I was okay” you smile a little sadly “I know I accidentally stood him up… but he never asked if everything was okay” 

Charlie is… definitely starting to grow a bit of a soft spot for you. He sighs and melts into his chair miserably before slapping his hands over his face. 

“He knows you’re fine” 

“And just how does he know? The jerk never checked in. Can you believe that?? He never even asked where I was! What if I was in a ditch!!” 

“Were you?” He interrupts and you huff

“Luckily no…”

He snorts and you roll your eyes “He could have called”

“He knows you’re fine” he repeats himself and now you cross your arms over your chest.

“That’s not helpful” 

“Have you tried calling him again?”

“Why? It all goes straight to busy… I think- I think he blocked my number.” 

He can hear the sadness in your voice and it just about breaks his heart. He reaches over and gently moves a curl from your face.

“I didn’t-“ he has to take a breath before he continues “I didn’t block your number, Y/N. We’ve been so go-go-go I didn’t really get the chance to introduce myself, you just sort of fell in my lap”

You narrow your eyes and purse your lips “Hmmmm yeah you know I’m startin’ to realize “Mr. Sheriff guy” isn’t exactly a name…” 

“You literally went home with me” He runs his hands through his hair

“You’re a sheriff-“

“Chief”

“Now you wanna correct me? And anyway, everyone you know… seemed to let it happen!! so!!”

“Is- is this really how you live??” 

“Says the guy who never told me his name.” You scoff and cross your arms and it’s his time to narrow his eyes at you. 

Maybe you were friends with Emmett. 

“Okay. First, you never asked. Second, again you know it’s been kind of a busy night and-“

“Shouldn’t the first thing you do be to introduce yourself?” 

“Okay we- we are not turning this around on me-“

“You brought a stranger home!!!”

“Did you want to stay in the jail??” 

“I’m a stranger! What if I murder you!!” 

“How did we get here?” Charlie looks at his hands as his phone starts ringing, he pinches the bridge of his nose and gives you a sassy look before answering it.

“Hey… yeah she’s here, I’ve got her” 

“Oh, so you are gonna murder me!” You point accusatorially and his mouth drops. 

“I’m not gonna murder you!! Jesus- here just, just take the damn thing.” He hands over the phone and gets up to give you some privacy.  

How in the hell Bella ever thought this was a good idea is completely lost on him. 

You creep into the living room, your head down as you shyly pass him his phone back. 

“Some first date huh?” 

Alice had… a good laugh at your expense when she realized you didn’t know who Charlie was or where you were. You wanted to slam your head into the table over and over when she slowly walked you through the entire thing.

You’d been hanging out with Emmett entirely too much. 

“I’ll say” He pats the couch and you sit next to him, leaning back into the cushions.

“I didn’t stand you up” You mumble and he grins, putting his arm over the back of the seat.

“Yeah, I know” 

“I wanted to be on time, I- I took so long to get ready” You sigh, letting your head fall against his arm and he looks at you.

“For a drowned rat, I think you looked pretty nice for what it’s worth.” 

You swat his chest and roll your eyes playfully as he chuckles. He runs his hand over your hair, before pulling you a little closer to him.

Is he… really putting the moves on you? And why does it feel natural? You lean into him easily, coming closer to him. He can’t tell if it’s because you want to be next to him, or because you’re cold. He grabs the throw blanket from the back of the couch and tosses it over you. He lets out a surprised grunt when you pull your legs up on the couch and snuggle into his side, putting some of the blanket over him too. 

“So what are we watching?” 

He hands you the remote and you put on some reruns of Murder She Wrote.

“Gonna have it all figured out before she does? Chief Swan”

He knows you’re messing around and he thinks it’s funny, but it’s the way you said his name like that, the title that literally everyone calls him that just feels… different coming from you. He shifts a little but flicks your arm as a distraction.

“Shut up” 

You both start to nod off after a while, his head falls on yours and he swears his dreams get sweeter, his body feels lighter, and the usual anxious ache in his shoulders is gone… it’s kind of odd, but welcoming.

You wake up a bit, and readjust yourself, prodding at him lightly to lay down. He finds himself easily doing whatever you want, as he puts his legs up on the couch and you nuzzle into him, your body slotting in between him and the couch. He’s never been the cuddling type, but when your head lays on his chest he can’t help but wrap his arms around you and softly rub your side, soothing you back to sleep. 

The next morning is…Awkward. His eyes flutter open and you’re still there, sleeping soundly on his chest. You’ve got his shirt gripped tightly in your fingers, your thigh over his torso. He’s not sure how he’s going to get out from under you without waking you but he needs to do it, and he needs to do it fast. He knows the second you wake up you’ll feel it… and he’s not sure whether it just happened or if it had something to do with you but god has he never hated being a man more than in this moment.

You shift a little with his movements and he freezes, taking time to make sure you settle back in before moving your arm off him, he sits up a bit and starts to slide out from under you when you startle and push away from him some.

“Charlie?” You mutter and he freezes again 

“Uh…yeah?” 

“Where are you going?” Your voice is so small and feminine, and there’s that sleepy little rasp and it’s- it’s been too long since he heard that specific sound. He gulps and stays where he is, hovering in a weird position. 

“Just… just to the bathroom?” 

“Oh… come back fast okay?” You turn away and curl up under the blanket and he sighs in relief before rushing off to the bathroom. 

“So I thought after breakfast we could go out to where you left your car… you remember where that is?” 

He looks down at the steaming cup of coffee in his hands, you’d insisted on making breakfast as a thank you and after much protest, you shoved him down into a chair and he let you do what you wanted. 

He’d nearly choked on said coffee when you came into the kitchen, wearing one of his t-shirts. The band logo stretched across your chest and it hugged your curves better than anything he’d ever seen. 

“Sorry I kinda went through your laundry, your daughter’s clothes are nice! Honestly!! They’re just…. A bit small?” You gesture awkwardly to your chest. He hadn’t even noticed that you might be having a problem with the clothes, you were both so tired. 

He nodded dumbly as you set the cup down in front of him with a little wink and turned toward the fridge to find the eggs. He kept his cup to his mouth suspiciously long as you bent down to grab a few from the carton on the bottom shelf. 

“I think I remember, sure works for me” 

“Alright, we just gotta pick up a friend on the way” 

Charlie grips the wheel tightly as he drives down the road you’d directed him to. Billy had spent the last 20 minutes cheerfully learning all about you, the second he got in the car, Charlie knew this was the biggest mistake he’d ever made. 

“So what happened to your hot date last night” Billy snickers as Charlie helps him into the car.

“Hot date huh?” You pop out from between the seats and Billy smiles, shaking your hand as you introduce yourself. 

“Yeah, big man over here finally got himself a date. Between you and me, I’ve been telling him he needed to get la-“ 

“Okay! Okay, this was fun! But you know Y/N why don’t you just buckle up okay? Thank you.” 

“He’s just being shy” Billy completely ignores Charlie trying to signal him to shut the fuck up and continues. “I bet she went home with a smile on her face and a wobble in her step” 

You burst out laughing and Charlie steps out of the car, he legitimately pulls over and steps out for a minute. You and Billy cackle at his blush, pointing and laughing when he smacks his head against the cool metal of the hood of the truck. 

“I apologize for the… vulgarity” He chuckles, wiping his tears. “Nothin’ gives me more joy than harassing him” 

“Oh trust me, this was great” 

Charlie gets back into the truck, flexing his fingers on the steering wheel as you and Billy giggle to yourselves. He’s silent as he pulls up alongside your car and you hop out. Billy lets out a low whistle and Charlie sets his forehead on the steering wheel. 

“Is that one of your shirts?”

“Yes.” 

“Did she find that herself or did you give it to her”

“She found it.” He takes off his seatbelt and reaches for the door handle.

“What did you tell your date? Did she see you with her?” 

“She was my date.” 

Charlie leaves Billy in the car to stew as he comes over to yours, he opens the passenger side and gets in, watching you rifle through some papers. 

“Is he dying inside” 

“Oh yeah definitely” He shuts the door and you look at him, grinning. 

“Yeah I thought you’d really like your sweet revenge when it came”

“You wanna point at him now and laugh” 

“Oh a hundred percent” 

He watches you gather up a few things before you sigh, your travel makeup box in your lap. 

“What’s wrong?” 

“I’m just… disappointed my hard work went to waste” You smile sadly and he reaches over, his hand cupping your face.

“I already told you, you looked pretty.” 

“You really think so?” You lean into his hand “I mean Alice told me all about how cool and impressive you were” 

He’d have to thank her for that.

“I just… kinda wanted to impress you too you know? I had on my best heels and everything!” You reach in back and pull them upfront. 

He shifts a little, his jeans tightening. They are nice shoes, they’re black and shiny, he’s sure he could see his reflection in them. 

“I had to change my shoes to start walking” You frown and he takes one from you, looking it over.

“Would you have asked for a second date?” 

You look over at him, he’s got a lopsided smile and you can’t help but smile back at him. 

“Would you like? A second date… I’ll admit this wasn’t much of a first” 

“I dunno” he shrugs “I had a nice time with you, breakfast was good” you giggle and lean your head against the headrest. He likes you, he realizes and that’s kind of weird for him, a grown-ass man having a crush. But here he is, feeling like kicking his feet every time you smile at him like that smile is meant just for him maybe.

“Let me make dinner for you tonight” 

He’s inviting you on a second date, ever since Bella had moved away she constantly told him he nodded a hobby, and in an effort to get his nagging loving daughter off his back, he decided to enroll in a cooking class. 

“Okay, I’d like that. And Charlie?” 

You open the car door and then lean over the center console, kissing him softly. It’s such a surprise it takes him a second before he kisses you back, his finger hooks under your chin and he holds you in place, knowing you want to run away from him. 

He’s… well versed you realize, as you melt under his warmth. And truly he doesn’t want to admit.. it’s been a while since he’d done something like this, you make him feel like a teenager again as he cups your cheek, pulling you closer to him. You’re just reaching to put your arms around his neck when suddenly the truck horn blows and you scream. Charlie groans and reaches into his pocket for his phone that’s ringing. 

“What. Do you want?!” 

“If you guys are gonna have sex can you like… turn me in the opposite direction” 

Billy has apparently recovered from making an accidental ass out of himself as you climb into the front seat of the truck while Charlie handles the tow truck and paperwork.

“You like him?” Billy asks as you watch Charlie, his hands on his hips.

“A lot, he’s really nice, kinda sarcastic, kinda funny, and he smells- soooooo good” 

“Okay. Didn’t need to know that part” 

“Are you gonna tell me I’m wrong??” 

“I don’t smell my best friend? Like. Ever?” 

“Inhale”

“What no I’m not gon-“

“In. Hale!!!” 

Billy is a full-grown man. He’s been through more than anyone ever should in their lifetime. 

And he inhales when this little girl tells him to.

He inhales slowly while you’re nodding your head up and down.

“Oh yeahhhh”

“….. Well shit” 

Charlie opens the door as you’re shaking Billy by the lapels of his shirt and you’re both screaming about how good he smells.

“Uhhhh do you guys want me to go?” He points backward and you smooth out Billy’s shirt and hop from the truck. Charlie opens the back door for you and you give him a little salute as you climb back in. 

“We’re cool… we’re good, we’re cool” 

“We’re normal” Billy shrugs. 

Once you’re back at his place, you decide to go take a little nap. You leave him and Billy downstairs chattering away like they did in high school and slip into his room. To be honest you’re not all together sure it’s okay that you’re in there… but the large neatly made bed is calling your name. 

You remove the ill fitting pants you’d borrowed from Bella and crawl under the covers, curling up into his pillow and inhaling slowly. Yup, still smelled delicious. 

“She’s really into you” 

Billy stares at the TV while Charlie grabs a couple beers. He rolls his eyes and hands him one before plopping down on the couch. He sighs as he leans back, resting his head along the back.

“Is this what we’ve come to? Gossiping about my love life?” 

“Sarah would be eating it up and you know it” 

Charlie grins a little at the memory of her and nods. 

“S’pose so” 

“So… what about you?”

“I barely know the girl… she’s, nice. She’s fun… but I barely know her” 

“Are you actually going to take the time to get to know her? Or are you going to let her walk away? She’s a real catch, Charlie”

“You’ve spent an hour with her!” 

“And that’s all it took for me to see that… maybe Bella was right, I think she is good for you, I think she’s what you need to brighten this place up. The sun has finally come back to Forks.” 

You wander out of the bedroom around 3 and head back downstairs, you rub at your eyes sleepily as you stumble down the stairs.

“Hey sleepy head, how was your-“

You stand in front of him, doing a little stretching. The shirt rides up around your hips and he blinks slowly, taking in the soft buttery skin of your thighs. He can just see a hint of your pink panties before putting your arms back down. 

“You okay?” You move to stand between his legs and he looks up at you, slightly in awe

“Yeah” 

“You sure?”

He takes a breath before taking your hand and pulling you closer. You straddle his lap and he takes a second to smooth his hands over your thighs, feeling them in his grip. He seemed so into the softness of your body, your plush curves. 

“I’m sure”

“What’s this all about huh?” You giggle quietly and wrap your arms around his neck, he leans you closer into him and you feel his hands grip your ass. Your mouth falls open and he smirks. 

“I think it’s time I finally start thinkin’ about myself again.” 

So maybe he’s going a little overboard with Billy’s advice right now, to just relax and have fun with you. But he can’t find it in him to care when you nuzzle your nose against his. Is he going way too fast with this? Yes. Had he just met you? Also yes. 

But he’d be damned if he didn’t get at least a little sun while it was shining. 

“Sounds like a plan to me” You smile against his lips  and he rubs your sides slowly, feeling you up. You blush and scoot closer, settling down in his lap, and he can’t help but think about how the only thing separating him from feeling you is a pair of jeans and a thin pair of panties.

His hands slide up under your shirt, feeling your bare skin against his fingertips and you tilt your head, deepening the kiss with him at the same time your hips move forward a bit more. His hands freeze in place as you start to roll your hips against his clothed cock, they stutter slightly as you feel just how large he is.

“O-oh my god” You whisper and he pulls away to look at you

“What’s wrong?”

“Y-your really um-“ You pause for a moment, completely flustered when the front door suddenly opens.

“Charlie? dad thinks he left his-“

Charlie practically launches you off his lap as Jacob comes through the front door. You fall to the floor with a squeak and he stands up quickly, throwing the blanket over your bare legs while you’re still floundering to get up.

“He-uh he left his what??” His voice is high-pitched as he tries to step in front of you but it does little to stop Jacob from staring.

“Is she okay?”

“She’s fine”

“I think I broke my spleen”

“So your dad left something??” Charlie clears his throat and Jacob looks up at him

“Uhhh yeah… he thinks he might have left his meds in the couch or maybe the truck or something… do you uh-“ He’s trying not to snicker “You want me to check the truck first?”

Charlie pats his pants pockets and fishes out his keys, tossing them over to him.

“That would be nice, thank you.”

“I’m Jacob by the way” He tells the bundle of blanket on the floor and your little hand sticks out, waving in the wrong direction

“Y/N”

“She’s cute” Jacob mouths with a double thumbs up and Charlie has to refrain from going to grab his shotgun.

As soon as the front door closes again he turns to you, pushing the blanket back. You’re glaring up at him, your arms crossed.

“Are you ashamed of me?”

“Of course I’m not” He pulls you up from the floor and you flop down on the couch, sniffling a little.

“You shoved me off of you”

“You’re barely wearing any clothes”

“And?!” You huff and he rolls his eyes

“And… that’s Billy’s son”

You think about it for a moment, still pouting and looking away from him and he sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose before looking at you again

“Will a kiss make you feel better?”

Your head turns so fast he thinks you’ve got whiplash from it, he himself can’t even believe he said it.

“Maybe…”

He holds your chin in his fingers before kissing you again, it sends a jolt of electricity down your spine when you feel his other hand on your torso, pushing you down onto the couch again.

“I’m so sorry honeybee’” He whispers, his hand sliding between your thighs, your heart flutters as he rubs higher and higher, you can feel his hand brush against the front of your panties when there’s a loud knock at the front door again.

“Is it safe??” Jacob cracks the door and Charlie closes his eyes, letting out a long sigh before getting up and tossing the blanket back over you.

“Yeah, it’s safe”

You snicker as he comes in, shaking the bottle of meds and tossing Charlie back his key.

“Got em, thanks”

You sit up, swinging your legs off the couch and getting up, the blanket falls from your form and Jacob’s eyes widen.

“I’m feeling kind of cold… I’m gonna go take a shower okay?” You lay your hand on his chest, purposely putting your body against his and his cheeks redden.

“Uh…okay sure. Yeah”

Your hand slides down his torso and you let it settle on his hip.

“Come up soon?” You whisper, but there’s no point, because Jacob can hear it anyway

“Okay” He kisses your forehead before you finally pull away, holding his hand until you can’t anymore

“It was nice meeting you Jacob” You give him a little wave and he smiles, tipping his head as you walk up the stairs.

“It was nice to meet you too. Maybe we can have you two over for dinner soon.”

As soon as he’s sure you’re out of earshot he comes over to Charlie, holding his hand up for a high five

“My man” He laughs and Charlie slaps his hands over his face and falls onto the couch.

What was he going to do with you?

[lambdysphoria]

ORGANIC (possibly toxic) MENACE HAS BEEN CONTAINED

Been getting into transformers again recently. I wuv Red Alert.

[normystical]

ATTENTION ALL ALASTOR SHIPPERS: 

uniromantic 

THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME. PROCEED

[slashermadness]

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