#terrifying in that we change. so much.

[computer-boy]

wonder if ill ever look back at these posts like 'woww i was so cringe lol' i can't even say anything because im gonna get made fun of by myself down the line

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Council of lovefools.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[hplonesomeart]

Hey!! So turns out a video I made between a certain “well beloved but highly sensitive/emotionally reactive T.V” and an “orange haired inkling-turned-human” has managed to sweep my YouTube channel and accumulate 100k VIEWS!! THAT’S A LOT OF PEOPLE ACTUALLY?? My most widely viewed video EVER to exist in this moment in time?? AAAAA?? Not even mentioning the various comments and staggering increase in subs! It’s so much more then what I expected or even prepared for—might even be the most impactful thing to happen for me this year <3

…aside from graduating high school + the social connections I’ve been fortunate to make lol

BUT THE POINT IS I’d been closely monitoring the YouTube growth through the entirety of October. It’s make me smile like a dork, gawk in astonishment, dance frantically in my room from the energy boosts, and grow courage to stop being so selective/self-conscious with what I wish to share with the world! It’s kept my ambitions going!

I needed to find some way to celebrate the occasion and express my thanks—because I can’t NOT acknowledge this milestone jksjskp. Typically I try to avoid getting tunnel visioned focusing on the metrics/numbers. Mr. Puzzles had already demonstrated how much those things can mess with the minds of creatives. Caring too much about chasing views or placing your artistic value in attention seeking gets damaging. But at same time…it’s hard to deny the sense of pride the 100k achievement has filled me with. I understand that reaching 100k views doesn’t immediately make me any “better” or “worse” then I was before. I’m still just me! It only helps me feel seen by others—and that’s all I really needed. To hear some nice words & receive reminders that my ideas are cared about. So thank you SMG4 fandom for that, seriously thank you.

Please accept this Mr. Puzzle drawing as a way of sharing the happiness around. He’s so entertaining. Love him for simply existing. So glad we can all collectively be super attached to him (and the rest of the SMG4 cast of course). Can’t wait to see more incredible artworks from the fandom :)

Just incase anyone is confused by my vague description over which “animated video” I’m referring to here—hopefully this photo will help clarify lol. It’s this one!! Sorry about not outright stating the title at the start, I got carried away with writing!!

I’ve been in an odd place mentally when thinking about it. Wondering to myself if any of the attention is deserved considering it’s not even fully colored and could be dismissed as “low effort” content (despite taking several days making it). It’s easy to get into a trap of comparing yourself to others and questioning how much of the videos success is based on your skills, sheer algorithm luck, or only because you used popular characters and catered to a specific fandom. And then judging yourself by looking at other peoples videos. I’ve seen several artists post higher quality works then my own but it somehow gets less views. So why did mine succeed when others (who should have gotten just as much attention if not more) didn’t? Sometimes you feel like you’ve unfairly robbed them of that chance to be seen. However I’ve realized that I can’t ever expect views to be consistent—and comparing is pointless. So why worry about it or feel inadequate? I mean it’s pretty common for funny cat videos to go viral, so who am I to question the system lol. “Popular” YouTube videos can range from a passion project which took 7+ artists…to a clip of Toad singing Chandelier or a nonsensical Vine sketch. Anything can happen when it’s the internet! And just-so-happened my video was chosen. I should stay glad about that and get rid of all the overanalyzing. So that’s what I’ve chosen to do :)

[goldkirk]

I'm so proud of myself about finances in the past couple months. I still struggle with money but I did enough meditation and journaling and practicing about it to make myself able to actually face my loans and credit cards and savings and bills and start really truly organizing and addressing them for the first time in years instead of just flying by the seat of my pants.

Like. This is a huge deal for me. I've felt like I'm in deadly danger every time I've tried to think about money for years and years. I'm finally able to look it in the face and stare it down and start to organize and plan on purpose instead of just keeping up with the minimum to stay afloat. I'm so proud of myself.

It's still a refrain of "GUILT (funny link)" every time I think about money but I'm able to actually make spreadsheets and face the numbers and monthly tracking again, and even make a new full budget which I haven't been able to do in ages.

still feel guilt, overwhelm, and helplessness, but no longer feel as much deep elemental shame and terror. that's progress baby

[doctorbrown]

MCFLY JULY ‘24 ⸺ 「 5 / 31 * DON'T NEED MONEY, DON'T TAKE FAME 」

“Clara?”

“Hm?”

He swallows, struck by a sudden bout of self-consciousness that he’d never known before, certainly not to such an extent. It ties his tongue in knots and makes a lead weight of his stomach and Emmett kicks himself for such a childish reaction when even in his youth, he’d never been so uncertain.

But never before had he fallen so completely and utterly in love with somebody that he can almost find sense in those silly romance novels—the lightning strike when their eyes met, the speechlessness, the feeling of being struck by a speeding vehicle…

He would have dismissed all that as romantic nonsense, once. Now, despite its entirely unscientific basis, Emmett can’t deny it when he feels it firsthand, struck dumb every time he so much glances at her.

This is love and he can’t—no, he doesn’t want to spend another day without her.

“Will you marry me?”

“Of course I will—yes.”

“I—wait, what?”

“I’ll marry you, Emmett.”

Of all the things he’d been expecting, he’d not expected her to answer without even a moment’s hesitation or the slightest hint of uncertainty to her voice. His heart leaps then very nearly stops and Emmett doesn’t dare wonder if this is all a dream, if he'll wake up at the slightest provocation alone in his bed.

“I don’t mean this lightly, Clara—”

“—And neither do I. I’m absolutely serious.”

“You know I’m nothing like Edward Allgood, I won’t be able to—”

“And I should say that’s a good thing!” Emmett blinks, stunned into uncharacteristic silence. “Edward is a fine man—he has everything any woman could want: impeccable social standing, a well-respected job, a sizeable estate. Any woman would be lucky to be his wife.”

Emmett quirks a brow, trying and failing to follow her potential train of thought. As far as eligible bachelors went, there were far more suitable candidates and sometimes he can’t help but wonder if he’s dreaming when Clara looks at him too long with those deep brown eyes of her. Each and every time, fear kept him from pinching himself to find out the truth. “Exactly. I’m twice your age, Clara, I don’t have a home to give you that you deserve, I’m only a blacksmith earning a modest living with a questionable reputation around town, so—”

“So, Emmett,” Clara cuts in emphatically, refusing to hear even one more word on the matter, “that’s precisely the point,” When it’s clear that he is still lost as to her reasoning, as evidenced by the puzzled look that has his brows scrunched together and his head cocked to the side like a confused puppy, Clara continues, but not without a smile.

“I’m sure for many young women, that kind of life is a dream. And I don’t see anything wrong with any of those things you’ve just said. As far as I’m concerned, those are all positives. However, the idea of living the ordinary life of a simple housewife is absolutely maddening. I think I would lose my mind from boredom to be nothing but a pretty wife to an equally handsome young man with a predictable lifestyle.

“If money or a reputable name or a comfortable, easy life was all I was after, I would have been married long ago and probably still be living in New Jersey. I wouldn’t have taken the job across the country to be teaching in this small town in California, thousands of miles from everything I’ve ever known.” She pauses only a moment to let the implications sink in.

“But men like Edward Allgood and his sort have no interest in Jules Verne or the sciences, they find little joy in the wonders of life that have nothing to do with preserving their public image or adding to their fortune, we would have so very little in common, and, frankly, they’re not you, Emmett. I think I knew it from the moment we met that you would be the one for me and before you convince yourself of some ridiculous notion that I’m only saying this because you saved my life that day, I’m telling you to put that out of your head right now, because that couldn’t be farther from the truth.”

Emmett smiles, his face saying it all. That had been an irrational concern in the back of his mind, one that had eased up over the months of Clara’s affections never wavering the more she’d gotten to know him yet never truly faded, tormenting him on the occasional late nights when he couldn’t sleep, plagued by dreams of the space-time continuum unravelling due to his continued paradoxical presence in the past.

“I had worried about that, but—”

“But nothing. I love you, Emmett, and whatever that means, wherever we end up, I want to be with you.”

[mewkwota]

...I see... That is your desire... An endless thirst for glory... For blood... There is a way... So the battle can last... for eternity...

Earlier today I shared some sketches while tying back to a comic I made a long time ago. It's one that I'm still fond of, but as it's old I wanted to try redrawing one shot that I particularly liked.

That's always really hard to do, but the plus side here is that you now have a better look at what Richter was experiencing (spoiler: it's pain).

[mishkakagehishka]

"We're old moms, we can't wait to stop breastfeeding so we can get [very excited, shrill even] botooooox!!!"

We are never making it out of the patriarchy.

[rabbithaver]

every so often i will see a post from a leftist on this website that is so egregiously ableist that i remember that like. oh yeah the userbase of leftists on this website is violently anti-disabled people and will jump at any chance to demonize any of us for any reason. i just forget that fact because i'm extremely dedicated to curating my space

i'm paraphrasing here but i saw a post that said, "every time i see an American [disabled person] mention being scared about the election because they're afraid of losing their benefits i have to laugh. anybody who wants blood-soaked money from the US government deserves to starve" which. like. goodness that's a lot to unpack. i think we should burn the whole suitcase instead !

[wildsidejazz]

Seriously Kopi Luwak could have been such an interesting antagonist for Legoshi, there was so much potential. I feel like that organisation would have been far better at exploring the hardships of mixed species than solely just relying on Melon. Sure, Melon was the product of what can happen in extreme cases if someone is pushed to the margins but I feel like Kopi Luwak was set up to be a way darker foe than Melon just killing to feel alive.

Our introduction to then is that they targeted children in a kindergarden of mixed species animals and according to Free their goal is to eliminate all mixed species animals and the leader wanted to assess Melon's "worth". Gosha was there to defend the kids but based on his reaction this gang may have genuinely killed literal children.

It would have been super interesting to have Gosha more entangled with them, perhaps getting critical damage or barging in when Legoshi was there and thus expose Legoshi as a mixed species animal and turn him into the Kopi Luwak's target. Especially if they learn Legoshi's love is not only not of his own species, but an herbivore to the boot. Like what if they tried to capture him to turn him into a test/study subject.

Then the composition of the Kopi Luwak could be a dangerous combo as well. Deshico himself looks harmless but the bats he employs are a different case. Bats can carry around diseases like rabies (that is a certain miserable death to other mammals) for their entire life. Being a reptile descendant Legoshi may have a survival chance but if they used that for their means that would be terrifying.

Another interesting question would be how would Yahya come into this. We know he has a deep grudge towards mixed species relations as a whole since in his eyes that took Gosha away from him and he is prone to excessive force when it comes to carnivore criminals but I don't want to think he'd be on board with full-on genocide.

It cannot be denied though that the government shows favoritism for same species couples and will subsidize bringing forth children, while mixed species families are just barely tolerated and usually are massively frowned upon to the degree that kids are not accepted into regular daycare. With an environment like that I don't find it impossible that aithorities would willingly turn a blind eye to or outright support the vile conduct of the Kopi Luwak, just as the Mayor wanted to keep Haru's kidnapping a secret to preserve the fragile facade of peace.

Further complicating factor could be if on top of all this Legoshi wanted to keep Melon from this group's grasp because even his murderous ass doesn't deserve whatever the Kopi Luwak wanted of him and Melon slowly finding that he actually does enjoy being around Legoshi and not in his usual mocking way

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

me from last week had no business writing a line this good:

God makes men in his image and those men know violence like an oath, a birthright.

PARDON

[oldtestleper]

big spoilers for new info as of tonight's episode but eye am soooooooo curious about the extent to which galicaea is still opposed to cassandra in some way. obviously in her high elven form she was trying to get kristen as a follower rather than have her continue to investigate the nightmare king and find cassandra, like she was NOT trying to put her thumb on the scale in that way. and from the sound of it she and sol basically respectively absorbed/dissolved the domains that once belonged to cassandra and ankarna through numerous calculated efforts of their clerics and evangelists, with sol and helio acquiring exclusive association with the sun and summer, and galicaea acquiring exclusive worship of the wood elves and becoming a goddess defined by certainty and eternity, driving away doubt. so is galicaea still playing the game even after being "restored" by wolfsong, trying to keep rage and doubt out of the world that is so well set up for her. was she ever really restored or was it doomed to be a cosmetic overhaul after the high elves got behind it again. like how christian fundamentalists dress like hipsters and open really trendy and successful coffee shops

[neverendingford]

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[coffeesforclosers13]

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[bunnyb34r]

It's WILD to me that we're experiencing the effects of Helene up in Ohio

Like it's like a fraction of a fraction of what's going on in the south, but still the same system. The arms or whatever of the hurricane system are slapping US with wind and rain rn like that's WILD

[thenerdofthegroup]

Halloooooo

Another theory brewing…

So I’m writing my document and have done analysis of a lot of what we’ve been given. The posters today, brilliant, trailers and teasers and clips, brilliant, Agatha pretending she doesn’t care when she actively needs these people, a mood.

But I came across a fun little easter egg that may help understand later parts of the show AKA what I am calling ‘The Wicked Scene’ AKA Lilia’s trial.

(I have spent an hour looking at pixels and it spells out the most basic plot but I'm sharing it because I'm proud of myself so be nice)

In this scene in the Coven Roundup teaser, we see a new second of her trial:

So clearly this is a card reading. I will show my thoughts of what each card are and a short explanation (that I copied from the internet so I’m sorry if they are slightly wrong):

Top Right: Page of Swords. Upright: Caution and Weariness. Reversed: acting hastily, deep mistrust based on the past

Top Left: The World. Upright: Success, achievement. Reversed: close to completion but are stuck

Middle: Ten of Swords. Upright: Extreme situation, violence, destruction that comes with an ending. Reversed: denial, going down a painful and wrong road but leading to no definite ending

Bottom Right: The Hanged Man. Upright: rite of passage through mediation and sacrifice. Reversed: not letting go, getting stuck

Bottom left: Wheel of Fortune. Upright: Changes ahead, good luck, advancing. Reversed: luck turns for the worst

So we know that this scene is already deadly. And I swear to fucking god if Lilia dies-

Now it’s important to note some are upside down. But this depends on who’s seeing them. If it’s the chair with the sword in or the opposite. And there is one out of frame and one below the Ten of Swords. But it is clearly describing that this is most likely the 6th or 7th episode. I’m under the belief that each episode is dedicated to a big trial that is dedicated to a person so surely the last three will go Rio, Billy then Agatha? But this does seem to be an end one. Maybe they are going more on story. Or maybe it isn’t one trial per episode. But this is spelling out:

This situation is one of the most dangerous, they will need luck and critical thinking to get out of it, good luck is either there or not, and in the end they will need a lot of caution and care to get what they want. And I think this is mainly directed at Lilia (since it’s her trial) but also Agatha because I think there will be a lot of twists in the end… don't know what haha but I feel there will be!

And I am such a nerd I ended it with ‘And that’s just a theory……. A FILM THEO-’ I need psychological help my god. Or a girlfriend to rant about this too. Both help

Can you tell I’m writing this at 00:37 at night!

Anyway, like I said… pretty normal stuff for a show but I spent an hour doing this and looking up the meanings so I wanted to share! Have a good evening

Ps my document is at 74 pages... This is getting insane. I also may make a post adding onto trickofthelights tarot card deck because you helped me a lot in my analysis so thank you 🙏 and that took me 4 hours and I don't want it to go to waste. Took me 30 minutes to find what a Quatrefoil was called…

[monty-glasses-roxy]

For some reason, this round of meds (same dose and everything as last time) is making me have very violent Realisations and Remembering Things moments. And by that I mean the Thing I Forgot and/or the Realisations show up with a bat and see how hard they can make my brain hit the wall. So anyway.

YOU GUYS REMEMBER SPIKE THE WETFLOOR BOT??? YOU GUYS REMEMBER HER??? THE FIRST FAZBEAR ANIMATRONIC TO BE BORN FROM LOVE INSTEAD OF PAIN??? YOU REMEMBER HER???

CAUSE I JUST DID