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Tell Me What Changed Part 10 A
Banner and lines by the talented @awrkive
Summary: Alex and Jungkook have been best friends since childhood âactual best friends. She is NOT in love with him, for real, and wishes people would stop assuming that. Why does no one question if heâs in love with her? Huh? But it might have to do with his successful fuckboy status, while Alex is very much⊠not that. Which is fine and doesnât matter! Until Jiminâs impending wedding leaves her eager for a date and willing to put herself out there, and Jungkook canât believe what happens next.
Fuckboy Best Friend JK x OC
CW and tags:Â fuckboy behavior, jealousy, pining, heartbreak, angst, bad language, explicit sex, sexy photos, alcohol, f2l, who knows what else
Read on AO3 here or below cut
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This chapter is split into two parts, make sure to read 11B before you go onto chapter 11!
Jungkook had seen the venue that morning. He was wearing a tux. Heâd been along for the ride emotionally for the whole planning over the last year. It wasnât like he didnât know going into it that this wedding was the fanciest thing he would ever be at. But still, there was something overpowering about the event when it was finally time.Â
Or maybe he was nervous about other things.
No. No, it was the wedding, that was all.
He fidgeted with the cuffs of his shirt in his jacket sleeves as he, Jimin, and the other groomsmen waited in a lavishly decorated hallway for Inâam to descend so Jimin could walk her into the ceremony, one of the customs Inâam had wanted to preserve of Egyptian weddings. Â
They had already taken pictures a couple of hours ago, already caught on film when Jimin had seen Inâam in her wedding dress for the first time looking like a goddamn princess, that was the truth. The white and gold, the diamonds, the elegant fit, the graceful way Inâam always had of moving, it left Jungkook wondering not for the first time if heâd been casually chilling with a true princess all this time. Jimin cried. Jungkook almost cried because his friend was crying. Inâam glowed. It was nice to see your friends so happy.
Because of that, Jungkook had expected her appearance this time to be unremarkable. It was not. Jimin teared up again. He accused Inâam of getting more beautiful in the last hour. Inâam smiled and tenderly touched his face.
Jungkook cleared his throat and looked away at the intimate gesture. His whole body felt like a bag of bees. Nerves. He better not fuck up the wedding. That was all he was worried about. Seriously. Nothing else. Thatâs why it felt like he was moving through water with every wedding thing they did today, the ticking echo of a countdown clock in the background making the hairs stand up on the back of his neck. He just didnât want to fuck up their wedding. Honest to god truth.
There was nothing else to be nervous about.
The wedding event had control of two giant ballrooms, one for the ceremony and one for the reception. Jungkook offered his arm to Inaâmâs younger sister âwhom he had not slept with, just to be crystal clearâ and followed along behind Jiminâs brother and Inâamâs older sister down the central aisle. The sea of quiet chatter disappeared as a string quartet played something Jungkook couldnât recognize now. He was focused on not stepping on his partnerâs dress, but also he was scanning the faces.
She was here. Sheâd been at Inâamâs henna night. Heâd checked her instagram feed earlier because she was posting again but it was still just random cats and a fat squirrel terrorizing her dadâs bird feeder âwhich he sympathized with Baba more about now that he and Namjoon had their own squirrel problem. Nothing had been more gratifying than when heâd greased the pole and theyâd watched through the window as the fuckers slid helplessly back down to the ground.
Greased the pole as in he put crisco on the bird feeder hanger, not⊠not that pole⊠that had nothing to do with squirrels obviouslyâŠ
His thoughts were scrambled. He wasnât seeing her but there were so many people. Hundreds of people. And it was hard to see everyone because the lighting was all fancy, shining a spotlight on the wedding party as they paraded down the aisle between the birch branches strung with fairy lights. Yes, he knew they were birch branches because there had been a whole thing about it. There had been a whole thing about every single detail of this wedding. If he ever got married, he did not want it to be this way.
But Jimin and Inâam seemed happy despite all the battles with their family and thatâs what mattered. It was easy to smile at them as they took their positions in front of the officiant. His work was done for now except to stand there and look handsome and happy for them, so he went back to scanning the elaborately decorated room for a single face while trying not to look like he was doing exactly that.Â
She was here. She had to be here.Â
He saw May first actually, next to Minxi who had brought her as her +1, and Rebekah, and then Alex! Wedged in between Rebekah and Sabina, a dip between her two taller friends. She was having to lean this way and that to see in front of the taller people in front of her. She was short! She should have sat close to the front, or on the aisle! He almost didnât recognize her at first because she had a haircut. Bangs. Other than that, he couldnât make out much about her from this distance but she was here and relief settled around him.Â
Now he could relax and enjoy the wedding. The wedding was going on, and Alex was here, so everything was fine. He just hadnât seen her in so long! Not since the arcade, except when he had waved as she she drove away for Thanksgiving with Hoseokâs family.Â
Where, rumor had it, she had broken up with her boyfriend.
A whole ass two and a half weeks ago during which Jungkook hadnât heard from her, and had been too chicken to ask anyone else to confirm what he thought Mayâs texts meant. No one else had said anything, but maybe no one else knew anything yet? Or they just werenât telling him? It was fucked up, people should tell him that kind of thing without him having to embarrass himself by asking!
It wasnât like Jungkook was just sitting around waiting for gossip though, he really had been busy, thank fuck. It kept him from being able to just sit around waiting for her call ânot that he would have! Obviously! Just for her to say what? If he had anything to do with the breakup? Or if the end of that relationship at least meant they could be friends again, even if the breakup had been nothing to do with him, even if she just didnât return his feelings? He felt like being humble about the possibility rather than admitting his hopes might make it more likely to be true. If he was humble about it, maybe that would make the better thing true.
She hadnât dumped another guy for him, had she?
Had she?!
Was he just her go-to excuse for getting out of tough situations? Sheâd used the her grandma dying and her dog dying too many times, so âMy friend is in love with meâ was her backup?
So no, no he had not just been sitting around waiting for her, even if his brain had found plenty of time to wonder and worry and panic in between.
Work had been busy for the holiday shopping season. He and Namjoon had tried to do some late fall house things instead of paying someone else to do it, like cleaning the gutters. There had been lots of last minute wedding things to do, and emotional support to lend Jimin and Inâam, and a bachelor party last weekend that had taken two days to recover from. Plus he was an uncle now! Jinhyungâs baby was small and kinda weird looking but cute too, and heâd gone by a few times to visit or drop things off because his mom asked him to.Â
See! So much going on! He had not just sat around thinking about Alex and if she was okay, and if the breakup had been really upsetting, and who was buying her ice cream, and whether he had anything to do with it. May wouldnât tell him shit except for her cryptic out of the blue text: bye hoseok barely knew ye
Jimin and Inâam shuffled around to sing the contract âa sweet one they had written together and read out now like personal vows, meshing wedding traditions in a way that Jungkook admired partly because they did it despite their families. Families shouldnât have a final say.
Although maybe sometimes families should step the fuck up and say something if they noticed their son was in love with his friend; they could like, give him a nudge or something and help him figure it out soonerâ
Whatever. His smile was sincere as he watched two people he loved take a moment to celebrate this official, legal, spiritual, and familial merging of their lives in front of hundreds of people, many of whom they barely knew. But they were happy. Different people liked different things. Different people took different paths in life.
His gaze drifted out to the audience again. Would Alex cry at something like this? She hadnât cried at Namjoonâs wedding but that was a long time ago and she hadnât liked the bride. He didnât think she looked like she was crying. He couldnât tell from the distance. Was she looking at him?! Or the couple getting married in front of him? He straightened his shoulders and stretched his neck and smoldered, just in case.
His attention returned to Jimin and Inâam as they exchanged the rings, simple gold bands, their eyes shining brighter than any diamonds. Inâam glowed when she looked at Jimin. He couldnât see Jiminâs face but he could feel the same glow emanating from his posture. They loved each other deeply, exactly the kind of love you hoped for your friend. Jimin deserved that, and so did Inâam. They were two of the best people heâd ever met.
Oh fuck he was crying! So much for looking cool. Inâam noticed and smiled, which made him laugh awkwardly and lift a hand to wipe a tear, at which point he heard a sob from Taehyung in front of him.
âAre they crying?â Jimin asked and looked over his shoulder and laughed through his own tears. The bridesmaids were fine, but the groomsmen were crumbling as Inâamâs brother took a deep gasping breath amid a stream of tears. Inâamâs father, a big burly man with a stern face at all times, coughed and then loudly blew his nose. It earned a laugh at least in the near vicinity.Â
âWhy arenât you crying yet?â Jimin jokingly asked his brother.
âIâm in shock she married you,â JIminâs brother answered and Inâam laughed, Jimin laughed. Jungkook thought the laughter in the ceremony was one of the most important parts. The joy made the ceremony even more personal. Who cared that there were hundreds of semi-strangers watching you, if you could embrace laughter even in the height of an emotional moment like this? Thatâs the only way heâd ever make it through something formal like this. Only with someone he could laugh with.
Ahem.
The ceremony continued despite the brief pause. It felt simultaneously an eternity and too short.Â
Jimin and Inâam walked back down the aisle to cheers. Jungkook escorted Inâamâs sister back, trying not to make it obvious he was looking at Alex when he passed but May had a shit-eating smile anyway.Â
Jungkook was glad now that theyâd already taken the wedding party photos and he didnât have to roll right into that, but Jimin and Inâam had some to take with their parents and immediately family so there was still a break before theyâd do their grand entrance to the wedding party.Â
âWant to go sneak and say hello?â Taehyung asked with an elbow in his ribs.Â
âDouble entrance?â
âYou got something against DP?â
Jungkook snorted. How strange to not be in the gutter with Taehyung right now! The event organizer shouted after them not to wander off but Taehyung just kep walking; Jungkook promised her they were just going to get drinks and would be back before Jimin and Inâam. She ran this thing with an iron fist and he was afraid of landing on the wrong side of her.
Jungkook would not have known where to go in the mob of guests moving from ceremony ballroom to the bigger reception room, but Taehyung seemed to know exactly where he was going. So Jungkook stuck close as they wound their way through the crowd, around the gloved waiters circling with hors d'oeuvres on silver platters, past the open bars opening under the judgmental glares of the contingent of Inâamâs family who had lost the bid for a dry wedding. Jimin and Inâam were pretending to pay for it so as not to start a war between the families but secretly it was Jiminâs parents who had insisted wines, beers, and champagnes must be available or it wasnât a proper celebration.
Their group had curled around a standing table in the âminglingâ area of the ballroom, packed in among big vases of more birch trees so that it was a bit dangerous to get anywhere without running face-first into a sharp stick.
Alex had her back to him, the table awkwardly high in front of her, which May seemed to be mocking her about. They all had drinks; Jungkook didnât understand how they had escaped the ceremony hall so fast but his sense of time was all fucked up today. She had something in a martini glass and lifted it delicately from the too-high table but he couldnât see her sip it. Even if sheâd been facing him, he might have been too distracted by the way her burgundy dress clung to her body. Was that fucking velvet?! Her hair was down but curled, an unusual look for her; she always complained it didnât hold curl and he wondered if sheâd had it professionally done. Sheâd clearly dressed up. Damn, the dress was so fitted to her bodyâ
On second thought, he grabbed Taehyungâs arm and said, âHey, Iâm going to get a drink, want anything?â
âNah, line is too long.â
Jungkook didnât care. Velvet, was she really wearing velvet? Had he seen that right? Did he care about velvet? Apparently he did.Â
He turned tail and ran towards the bar in the far corner, but Taehyung was right that the lines were too long and now he didnât want to actually be gone that long. So when a waiter walked by with white wine on a tray, he took one of those and doubled back and this time made himself continue forward towards the cluster of his friends even as he felt his heart start to race.
Maybe joining the table next to Alex was a stupid move, but it was the natural entrypoint to the group, so he tried to keep his attention instead on May and Minxi. They looked fine, casual, but not really close so if you didnât know they were girlfriends you might not guess it. Was that on purpose or were they just not big on PDA? This was the first time Minxi had brought May to something; he hadnât been around to hear her introduce May as her girlfriend. He wondered what had been more surprising, the girlfriend or that the girlfriend was Alexâs sisterâ
Yeah, who cared about them. Alex looked up at him with a little squeak, because of course she did, he was suddenly right beside her, and when he looked down at her he did first notice that she was wearing makeup and looked really pretty nice, he noticed that first. Her eyelashes looked really big. But something else also big caught his eyes, right down the low v of her cleavage; she even had a gold necklace with lots of little dangly things to make sure your eye went right down the front of her dress. As if you wouldnât notice it on your own.Â
âYou look like plum wine,â he blurted out in an attempt to not say something worse. âYour eyelashes are nice.â
Alex stared for an eternity (one second) and then snorted right into a laugh. An Alex laugh. The most familiar laugh to him in the whole world and something inside of him healed just a smidge. She was laughing at him. Fuck, heâd missed her laughing at him. Endeared by the idiot she knew he was. Accepting of it.Â
Was he reading too much into a laugh? Maybe.
âHey, babe, your eyelashes look great too,â May said to Minxi. âBest eyelashes in the room.â
âYours are ok,â Minxi returned, to Mayâs gasp, and Alex explaining to Jungkook, âThe best part of this whole coming out thing is watching someone finally give May the shit she deserves. Boys were always too afraid of her, it was boring.â She sounded so casual that for a second Jungkook could believe the last six months hadnât ever happened. It was just Alex, the same Alex as before except really fucking fancy right now. Fancy Alex. He wanted to pet her. Old Jungkook would definitely have pet her like a dog and sheâd have pushed him away probably and heâd have teased her because why did she wear a dress like that if she didnât want people stroking herâ
Damn, it was going to be really hard not to touch that dress. It was begging to be touched. Right down her back, right over her assâÂ
Alex caught his stair and grinned, âYou like the sleeves?â She raised an arm and flapped it, showing how the fabric fluttered.
âUm⊠yeah, itâs nice.â
That seemed to have been the wrong answer; she glanced at him and looked a little sad, he thought? He couldnât fucking tell. He couldnât pretend to tell. Never in his life had he felt both so eager to understand what she was thinking and so hopelessly disconnected from her. Looks, gestures, words might all mean different things now than they used to. Or maybe theyâd always meant different things than heâd understood because heâd always just been stupid and wrong and believed it was true when she would say for the hundredth time that obviously she was not in love with him.
 A tray of food appeared briefly in front of them and Jungkook grabbed whatever it was without looking and popped it in his mouth. Chewing gave him an obvious excuse to not say something; now he worried he looked weird to be in a conversation with just these three instead of the whole table, like heâd specifically come here for Alexâs attention. He hadnât! (He had.)Â
âFor our wedding, I think weâll give some people a Minus One,â Taehyung said, gesturing to Sabina, to whom he had proposed a week ago. âSo like five people get to choose someone to disinvite from the wedding.â
Sabina covered her face and sighed, âYou stole that joke from Twitter, babeâŠâ
âWhat?! I would never!â
The awkwardness of it made everyone laugh but Taehyung didnât look bothered at getting caught, just sipped the champagne Sabina must have already snagged for him. Namjoon booed Taehyung and then looked at something on Rebekahâs phone, and then nudged Yoongiâs shoulder to get him to look as well.Â
So Alex had been hanging out with Yoongi at the table. Maybe theyâd even been sitting near each other at the ceremony. Jungkook hadnât bothered to look for anyone but her. He glanced at her, curious how that had gone, if she was as bothered as she had expected to be to attend without a date⊠as she seemed to be missing⊠He scanned the room just in case Hoseok actually was here, just getting Alex a drink or something. But she already had a drink, which she lifted and sipped again. And spilled a little on her chest. Jungkook pretended not to notice as she dabbed at it with a cocktail napkin. Heâd do it for freeâŠ.
âUm, howâs work?â she asked. It took him a second to realize she was talking to him, but she had to be because Minxi and May were suddenly whispering about something else and then May dragged Minxi off towards something and it was just the two of them standing there now on this side of the table.Â
âYeah. Uh, yeah, itâs good, itâs busy. Holiday season. Howâs your um, phone plan working for you?â
She snickered, âItâs, you know, a little more expensive than I was paying before.â He smiled too and looked away.Â
âYeah, well⊠itâs uh⊠sixteen full price frappuccinos a month?â
âPlease tell me you arenât drinking sixteen frappuccinos a monthââ
âWithout a discount? Are you insane?â
They shared a smile. Uncomfortable but trying. Namjoon and Taehyung laughed loudly at something and they both glanced over but Jungkook hadnât heard what it was and didnât really care.
âMy brother had his baby,â Jungkook contributed, worried that because she had turned, Alex would say something to pull herself into that other conversation and free herself from him.
âYeah, I know! Heâs so little!â
âOh, you knew?â
âI havenât gone to see him yet but mom did and took a lot of pictures.â
âYeah heâs really little⊠I mean, he doesnât do much yet.â
âHeâs like two weeks old,â Alex pointed out.
âYeah, I know! But you said you hadnât met him yet, so I just thought Iâd uh, tell you.â
Alex was grinning and he felt like she might be laughing at him. Her question felt too polite, âDo you like being an uncle?â
âNo, thatâs what Iâm saying, he doesnât know Iâm cool yet. He kind of just thinks Iâm another person to puke on.â
âI was going to say you have to wait twenty-one years before you can be the cool uncle and puke together but youâll be like fifty so maybe thatâs not really the cool uncle anymoreââ
âI wonât be fifty. Iâll be forty-seven, thanks,â he corrected. âDonât age me up, old lady.â
âListen here, when I was your age I wasâŠâ Her eyes rolled to the high ceiling as she pondered. âI donât know, eating ice cream and ragging on my sister for dating my friend without telling me?â She always did that when he called her old, say whatever sheâd been doing âwhen she was his ageâ two weeks ago. Some things never changed apparently.
It gave him a dose of hope.
âOh yeah. Yeah.â
âHeard you knew about that before me,â she prodded.
âYeah but um⊠we werenât talking and anyway I think thatâs the kind of secret you keep⊠Iâm actually really good at keeping secrets.â
âYeah even from yourself I guess?â
âI⊠guess⊠yeahâŠâ Was she jokingly referencing his feelings? Right here? Before theyâd even drank alcohol?!
But he couldnât be sure, because instead she asked, âHow did you find out? She wouldnât tell me.â
âOh, I ran into her in a gay club.â
âOh, you frequent gay clubs now?â
âUh, not for me,â he quickly assured her. She looked like she wanted to ask more, but Taehyung leaned across the table and said, âJimin called me, we gotta go back.â Which annoyed Jungkook because he was kinda in the middle of somethingâ but obviously he had to go. Obviously his friendâs wedding was more important than him slowly thawing the ice between him and Alex. Obviously.
Maybe it was better. He didnât feel on his game. He was flustered in a way he hadnât expected, even though she was laughing at his jokes, but he wasnât sure he really trusted it. Maybe she was just being polite. Or if she thought he was funny but just in the haha youâre my dopey friend way. Which he would accept, if that was it! If she just was going to ease back to being his friend again, all right! That was better than nothing! Maybe it had to be that because despite seducing a hundred women (ok it was nowhere near a hundred but a guy had a reputation to uphold), he didnât have any real idea about how to seduce Alex.
Not that he was trying to seduce her! Or, well, sorta. If she was single. And into that. Into him. If she wanted to be seduced. By him.Â
Fuck, he felt so awkward because she just looked at him like she was waiting for him to say something âor, worse, waiting for him to fuck off! He couldnât tell! Was he interferingâ
Oh shit, was Alex here cruising to pick someone up?! A not him someone? That could explain the dress! She never wore something that long and form-hugging and tit-attention-grabbing! Ever!
But even if sheâd been wearing a grocery bag, heâd probably be this nervous because A.) a grocery bag could rip and then sheâd just be naked right in front of him and more honestly B.) for the first time in their lives she knew he was into her at the same time she might be single.
A cold ball of dread rotated in his gut as he followed Taehyung back to join the rest of the wedding party in front of the ceremony room again.Â
He didnât appreciate it when Taehyung nudged him, âEh?â
âEh what?â
âYou two looked like dweeby college kids checking each other out at a party.â
âShut up,â Jungkook scoffed and shoved his shoulder but it just made Taehyung laugh and Jungkook wished Taehyung knew something he didnât. Like his friend was comfortable teasing him because he already knew things would work out ok. Jungkook didnât know that. He didnât know fucking anything right now except that Alex looked really pretty and he wanted to pet her dress.
On second thought, he asked, âShe broke up with Hoseok, right?â
âI donât know, I wasnât there, you should ask her.â
Jungkook narrowed his eyes at Taehyungâs smug grin. But still, it made him a little hopeful, because yeah, he didnât think Taehyung would be teasing about that if he knew for sure Jungkook had no chance. Though why Taehyung would know if Jungkook had a chance escaped him, so probably Taehyung was just being a smug shit because his love life was already settled. Lucky him.
âWhy did you call us back so soon?â Jungkook asked as they reached Jimin and Inâam.
âShe wants some more pictures,â Jimin tattled.
âHe wants some more pictures,â Inâam corrected and Jiminâs shit-eating grin made that clearly the truth.
Taehyung joked, âYeah you pulled us away just as Jungkook was starting to twirl his hair and flutter his eyelashes atââ
âFuck off, I was not.â
âLanguage,â Inâam scolded, tossing her head towards her younger sister, who rolled her eyes nearly out of her skull.
âI know how to say âfuckâ, Inâam.â
âYou better not!â
Jimin just backhanded Jungkook playfully in the stomach and suggested, âHey maybe donât wait so long this time? Someone might move in.â
âYeah, I know, she looks really nice tonight.â
âSo tell her thatââ
âHey I donât need anyoneâs help seducing anyone,â he lied. âI donât need the advice of anyone hereââ
âAh, I didnât realize you were just going for quick seduction. I thought you were wanting more longterm, like uhâŠâ Jimin playfully gestured between himself and Taehyung, and Jungkook got the message. The married guy. The engaged guy.
He just scoffed, âFocus on your own wedding, my man, you havenât even made it through the dinner yet.â
âOK but we are legally married so we could just run away if we want to,â Inâam suggested, which made Jimin laugh and wrap his arms around her.
âWeâre not running away.â At her frown, he grew a little more serious and said, âWell, if you need to, signal to me and weâll go.â
âYeah?â
âPromise.â
It was kinda fucking romantic and Jungkook felt like maybe he should be taking notesâŠ
The music started down the hall and even though he knew it was coming, it startled Jungkook out of his fluster about Alex. Various drums and a horn started first, and he could see the saxophonist though not hear it over the pounding of the drums. He wondered if hotel guests could hear this all the way into the main reception area and would wonder what was going on, though it felt obvious to him something joyous was happening.
A womanâs voice ululated, the distinct sound instantly capturing Jungkookâs attention as she beckoned them all to follow her down the center of the musicians towards the reception hall as four belly dancers took up place ahead of her to lead the way. Their costumes were sparse and shiny and tasseled and the way they moved their bodies was mesmerizing. They were working, probably off limits to a scoundrel like him, but maybe in another timeline Jungkook would have tried his luck with one of them. Probably one of the younger ones but hey, the two older ones might be cool too.
But tonight Jungkookâs thoughts were held by one woman in particular, and the suggestion of the same softer, fonder, longer-lasting thing that glowed in Jiminâs and Inâamâs faces. She looked like a queen again as she began to slow dance forward, swaying, moving her arms, flower bouquet raised like a beacon. Beside her, Jimin looked like a fucker in love, eyes all sparkly, what you could see of them above his wide, besotted grin as he held Inâamâs other hand and danced with her along the procession. It helped that Jimin had always been a good dancer with a natural grace. He looked right at home with Inâam in this procession, surrounded by voices singing in a language Jungkook couldnât understand.Â
Taehyung shrugged and grinned at Jungkook as they doubled up with the bridesmaids again to follow, but the movement was slow, and there was nothing so formal as holding hands or dancing in doubles. Everyone roamed this way and that along the slow progress, joining the singing or shouting at times. The music moved through his arms and legs, so Jungkook felt pretty in tune with it âonly for a moment did he feel self conscious when they entered the reception hall with all the music and shouting and dancing and he immediately spotted Alex, right where heâd left her, watching the whole thing.Â
She turned away when she saw him, but it was just to take Rebekahâs hand and dance with her, like most of the guests were doing. In a way it made him feel like they were dancing together. At least they were in the same party, the same celebration. Did she think this was cool? Would she want this much noise and attention made aboutâ
OK, he was not going to think about Alex and weddings before heâd even gotten to really talk to her! Besides, he didnât think she would want that much attention. But maybe she did? Turned out there were a lot of things he didnât know.
Well, heâd know long before they got to that point. If they got to that point! Oh god, marriage?! He just wanted to rub her velvet ass!
Ok, no, he wanted more than that. A lot more than that. Inclusive of that.
Thank god the drums were loud enough to drown out his panic again. He had an image to uphold. Just because he was nervous seeing Alex again for the first time in so long didnât mean he needed to get ahead of himself. Step one was just to convince her to let him back into her life. That was the goal for this evening. Be Alex and JK: Friends Forever again.Â
*
Alex had prepared to feel bad for Jungkook and Taehyung that theyâd be stuck sitting up at tables near the front, but then it turned out they were at the same table as her after all. Not next to her though; her seat had her between Namjoon and Sabina. She wondered if that was reflective of when she and Jungkook had not been talking. Theyâd separated them. And sure they could have just ignored the seating chart but for some reason no one did. They sat at their assigned seats at their round table and fidgeted with the water glasses and silverware and little cardstock nametags. They caused a ruckus at their table as they got situated with their drinks and appetizers, fighting over whose knife was whose, and damn it felt good to be back among her friends, even if her dumb sister was there too. They cheered the loudest at Taehyungâs best man speech, and the additions Jungkook made when he crashed it, that set both of them and Jimin off crying just like they had in the ceremony.
Jungkook looked so cute when he cried. His nose and eyes got so red and his pout gained strength. The contrast of it was just so funny because he obviously looked handsome as shit in his tuxedo but then his little baby eyes were flooding his pout like he hadnât got the color milk cup he wanted.Â
Damn he cleaned up well. So well. So well he looked like he belonged in this kind of high-dollar, elegant, sophisticated world that Jimin and Inâam had invited them into for their wedding. Alex had known Inâam came from money but she did not realize Jimin did as well, and honestly the whole wedding was fucking bonkers. Alex had felt overdressed until she got here and now worried she was underdressed. Her dress was simple, floor-length, a-line, faux-wrap, flutter sleeves, honestly the fanciest fucking thing sheâd ever worn, but not elaborate the way so many of the other women were dressed with their bright colors and sparkling jewels. There was so much gold in this room right now but her only gold was the little necklace her mom had given her for her birthday a few years ago and earrings she had borrowed from May. Her dress wasnât actually an expensive one. Sheâd taken a chance on one of those online websites that seemed too good to be true, but the thing had fucking delivered. She felt pretty.Â
Pretty enough to get noticed? Maybe soâŠ
Maybe it was just the glow carrying over from Inâamâs henna night, which she had danced her face off at, and stayed up all night talking with more of Inâamâs friends and sisters and cousins than she had met before, and just basked in the joy and love and cultural tradition. It made her a little sad her own family wasnât more traditional. Sheâd said as much to her mom, who had threatened to whack her with the newspaper after apparently complaining a little too much growing up about the ways in which they were. But Egyptian traditions were so cool! Her mom had whacked her on the arm.
She just found the wedding magical and overwhelming, way more than she had expected to, since her visibility into the planning of it had been all the stress and drama. She hadnât understood the true scale of it, even after the engagement party. The one where she had asked Jungkook to come as her date and heâd so emphatically turned her down.
And here he was, dateless, just like he had wanted.
And here she was dateless too, but actually it wasnât so bad. It left her free to snicker into her napkin every time Namjoon made a quiet, bitter comment under his breath during the speeches that accompanied dinner. He wasnât serious; clearly he was doing it for laughs, and it was working, earning him lots of laughs from her and Rebekah on his other side and Yoongi on the other side of her. Yoongi who was oddly here without his fiance.
Ok, maybe Alex was exaggerating her laughter a little. Because Jungkook kept glancing over when she laughed, and also she just wanted to be clear to everyone that she didnât have a date because of her own choice. Sheâd had a wonderful boyfriend who had been fully prepared to escort her to this wedding.
And then sheâd dumped him in the airport. Not her best moment. But so it happened, and now she was single at this wedding.
And here was Jungkook too, without a date, not yet latched onto anyone else.
She didnât want to seem as pathetically eager for his attention as she was. She leaned on her friends for strength. It led her to do other stupid things besides laughing too loud and drinking too much champaign too early in the evening and accidentally, in a moment of messing around with Namjoon, flinging a spoonful of rice onto the floor. Not her fault! Namjoonâs! He seemed unusually playful too. It was his fault.
She worried she was being too loud and annoying.
She needed to do something less obvious. Less desperate-seeming. Less Jungkook-attention-seeking.
So in a fit of bold stupidity, after a truly fascinating performance by the quartet of bellydancers who had led the procession in, when they ran through the tables passing out jingly scarves to encourage guests to come dance with them and Sabina grabbed Alexâs arm, she went. Why not? Get away from the table, away from trying not to make eye contact with Jungkook, look bold and brave and single ready to mingle just in case, you know, anyone was watching or something.Â
Alex tied a jingly scarf around her hips and attempted to bellydance in the middle of the dance floor.
âI canât move my hips like this,â Alex giggled to Sabina, clutching her arm as the bellydancers tried to lead them.
âYou can,â Sabina insisted, taking her arms so they danced facing each other, which helped Alex drown out the knowledge she was bellydancing in the middle of a wedding where most people were not. Granted, it was a crowd on the dancefloor doing this, and others were dancing at their tables, and she didnât feel like there was really anyone paying attention to her but still. âWiggle like you are getting fucked!â
The laughter from Alex was nearly a shout as she gave Sabina a playful shove, âThatâs not right! Thatâs what you look like?â Despite Sabinaâs elegance and beauty, these movements didnât come natural to her either; she was sort of cute and stiff with her gyrations. Alex watched one of the bellydancers âwho was actually very close to her own body type! That was cool!-- and tried to move her hips and shoulders the way the professionals did. All sizes could look good belly dancing. Theoretically.
She was sure it wasnât working. But actually it was really fun and playful to try, and the jingle of the scarf did make her feel a little sexy about her attempts. And even if she looked silly, all right, who fucking cared? She didnât have to dance to the beat or impress anyone, it wasnât about that. This was new Alex, Alex 3.0, Alex who did what she wanted and enjoyed herself and celebrated the love of her friends unabashedly and tried new things with limited fear and didnât give a shit what other people thought about her and what she wanted, Alex who went after the things she wanted in life. Alex who surrounded herself with people and things and goals that let her feel like enough.Â
Alex who was actually kind of digging this belly dancing thing. Maybe she should take a class or something? She was kind of feeling this! When the dancers moved through all of them and she found herself surrounded by happy, joyful, beautiful women, she felt that same tidal wave lifting her as she had at the henna night.Â
Yeah. This was going to be a good night. She could feel it through the drumbeat echoing in her bones.Â
Catch me if you can, she thought in Jungkookâs direction, trying not to look over at him. But also she wouldnât make it hard. But also she wanted to feel the effort.
âIâm going to tie this on Namjoon,â Alex said to Sabina. âLetâs get everyone up now?â
âI refuse to give this to Tae, he will keep it!â
Alex wished she felt confident yet to go up to Jungkook and tie the scarf around him. Soon, she thought. I hope. She glanced at her phone as they sauntered back to the table. Barely 6pm. But not yet, she grinned, because the night was just beginning, and Alex had come dressed to party, so party she would.
âNamjoon! Dance!â
âWhaa? No⊠Iâm finishing my food.â
âGet up, you oaf, your turn to shake your hips. Itâs your friendâs wedding, donât be a spoilsport.â
He sighed and stood up as if he didnât have a choice. Most people were done eating now. The dinner music was still going as people finished their meals, but the belly dancing seemed to signal a transition to the dancing part of the evening.
âHey, whenâs the cake?â Taehyung asked. âI want to make Jimin laugh when he cuts it with the sword.â
Rebekah gave him a look and prodded, âShouldnât you know? Arenât you one of the groomsmen running this thing?â
âOh shit, no, they donât tell us anything,â Taehyung laughed. âThey just tell us to stand places, look pretty, and make sure Jimin doesnât break his nose again.â
âIt looks good, though, right? It healed nicely,â Jungkook quickly insisted.Â
âHe feels guilty, it was his fault,â Yoongi explained to all with a snicker.
âIt was not!â
Taehyung wrestled the scarf out of Sabinaâs hands despite her protests and insisted as he shoved it against Jungkookâs scarf, âIt was. Now dance your penance. Letâs see how many fish you catch.â
âNah, man, Iâm not fishing tonight,â Jungkook said with the air of a designated driver. Alexâs head tilted. What⊠did that mean? Was that good or bad? Related to her or not? Was he thinking of a +1 he didnât get to bring or⊠had he sworn off sex or something?! This might complicate thingsâŠ
May leaned around and stole the scarf and turned to Minxi with a gleam in her eyes, despite Minxiâs adamant shake of her head and announcement, âI donât dance.â
âFor me?â
âPrivately.â
âYeah, me too, I only dance privately these days,â Jungkook agreed as if their conversations were connected.
âOh yeah? For who?â Taehyung demanded.
âYou snails are too slow, Iâm going to dance, goodbye!â Alex shouted, and grabbed Rebekahâs hand, and fled to the crowd of the dance floor to escape. Even though sheâd eaten so much at dinner she felt like puking. Better not to do that right in front of Jungkook, yeah?
*
Jungkook had lost sight of Alex. Easy to do since she was so short. He ought to have tied a balloon to her wrist âa joke he had made many times over the years, at concerts and amusement parks. She had reacted about as youâd expected: offended but also demanding he buy her a balloon.
He sighed. After sheâd run off to dance with Rebekah earlier, heâd had a hard time engineering their paths crossing. Heâd try to dance near her and then sheâd be gone for cake. Heâd try to meet up with her for cake but sheâd be getting a new drink. Heâd try to grab wine from a tray to save her the line but then sheâd be back on the dance floor. And then just as heâd get close to her, the damn event planner would be flagging him down for some other groomsman duty: joining a traditional dance, carting the gifts out to Inâamâs brotherâs car so he could take them home before anything got lost, helping Jiminâs grandmother out to her ride because she was ready to go home very early.
He was frustrated. The evening was rushing by and he wasnât getting any time in Alexâs orbit. Everything was in the way. Everything was fucking interferingâ
A hand touched his arm and then quickly pulled back; he stepped to the side, assuming someone was trying to squeeze past him to the dance floor heâd been surveying for any sight of her.
But it was Alex who looked up at him now from beneath the fringe of her hair.
âHey,â he greeted, realizing he sounded more surprised than cool. He sounded like heâd been looking for her. He didnât want to be that obvious.
âHey, um⊠do you⊠want to dance? With me?â She blink at him, owlish in her ask. She shouldnât be owlish. His heart thudded heavily in his chest at the question. No lead up. No prep. Sheâd just asked him outright. So straightforward. He would have fumbled for a while probably.
âOh. Uh yeah, sure.â
âI still suck, just to be clear.â
âOkââ
âI donât want to mess up your game or anythingââ She broke off when he touched her shoulder, nudging her to the dance floor. Her whole posture went rigid, like she was being marched to the principalâs office. Jungkook would have liked to reassure her but was too busy holding himself back from touching her more; he let his hand fall away from her shoulder in an attempt not to just wrap his arms around her and confess: whatever you want, yes, all you have to do is ask, Iâve been looking for you all night, donât wander off again.
The anticipation of touching her again made him jumpy. When she suddenly turned and stopped, he plowed into her and grabbed her shoulders to keep them both from falling, which pulled them close together. Just as quickly they sprang apart.Â
He wasnât prepared for her laugh, âYou arenât nearly as smooth as I always thought.â
âShut up,â he grumbled. âIâm just nervous.â
âBout what?â Her eyebrows lifted up behind her bangs. Teasing him. Taunting him. Fuck he had missed this.
âIt looks like you donât have eyebrows anymore.â
She huffed and swiped at them, brushing them to a slant so he could see a little more forehead and one eyebrow.Â
âThere, better?â She lifted her hands to his shoulders, reaching high, but it felt too middleschool to him, even though he liked that it pulled her close. But shit in looking down at her face it was impossible not to be drawn deep into the line of her cleavage just beneath her chin, like the view was just perfect and he didnât want that to show on his face, so he tugged her hand into his for a more proper dance position. He admired more than her tits, they were just so there tonight! Taunting him too! Everything about her taunted him tonight. Why had she worn this dress, damn!Â
The music was faster but they just swayed at their own pace, shuffling a little with each step. Jungkook focused at first on making sure he didnât step on her toes or the hem of her dress or bump her into anyone else âanything to try and distract him from the reality he was dancing this close with Alex, that her body was very close to pressing against his and her hand was in his, until he could handle that knowledge. Her hand was sweaty but so was his so maybe she couldnât tell about him.Â
âSoâŠâ Her lips pursed into a duck pout. He wanted to kiss her.
âCanât believe you got bangs,â he teased. There. Easy. Simple. Sheâd always said bangs would make her look like a fifth grader.Â
Her smile was immediate, a little bashful as she admitted, âYeah, it wasnât a great decision butââ
â--I think they look niceââ
âBangs are like the thing you do after a break up, I guess? Itâs a rule. Itâs in the handbook. I finally got my copy..â
âAh.â Break up. Break up. She mentioned they broke up. She just put it out there. She just said it. âUm, Iâm sorry to hear you uhââ
âAre you?â
âNo,â he admitted. He was relieved she laughed too. Was it like Yoongi? He wanted to ask but didnât. Just used his fingers on her back to pull her a little closer. âSorry I wasnât there to buy you ice cream this time.â
âItâs ok. Raincheck.â
âFor⊠after your next breakup?â
âI hope not.â
His skin was tingling. He felt like she might be having a different conversation or he might be misunderstanding and reading too much into the things she said so he shut his mouth for a moment and just enjoyed swaying with her. He looked around at the other couples and groups dancing. It felt like they were in a different place, dancing to different music. There were loud groups of people still clustered around tables, some drinking, some just loudly talking. The dimmed overheads and fairy lights actually made everything feel a little like prom. And he was just here, drifting in the middle of it all. With Alex. Perfectly, finally at peace.Â
He realized his fingers were stroking the fabric at her shoulder and, to hide this gaf, said, âYour dress is really nice. Really soft.â
âYou like it? I worried it was a little low cut butââ
âNah, itâs perfectââ
âMight seem too aggressive.â
âAggressive?â
âYou know, like⊠too obvious.â
âToo obviously⊠hot?â
âIs that what you think it is?â she asked him, looking up, bangs hiding her brows again. They did make her look younger but it wasnât a bad thing either way.Â
âYeah, itâs hot as fuck.â Shit, maybe he shouldnât have said that. âI mean, you look really pretty,â he hurried to add, even though that felt nauseatingly vulnerable for some reason. What, he couldnât tell Alex she looked pretty? Yeah, he couldnât. He always felt like a compliment like that to her would say too much. Show too much genuine interest. Or she wouldnât believe him. Or she wouldnât want that kind of attention from him.
âYou clean up pretty nice,â she countered. âI liked your speech.â
âI liked your belly dancingââ
âHey, be nice.â
âIâm serious!â
âYou know I canât dance.â
âI really liked it.â
âAre you being gross?â she demanded, a spark of their old relationship, and he felt great joy in admitting, âYes.â But then worried it was too much, too quick, they hadnât been comfortable in so long and corrected, âNo, but I meanââ
âUh huh.â
âAh, AlexâŠâ he sighed and didnât know what else to say, just looked away and was grateful she was short so it was easy not to look in her face. He wondered if sheâd know if he wiped his sweaty hand off on her dress. He was really sweating. It was going to soak through his shirt.Â
âI guess yourâ Anita hasnât been keeping up with you?âÂ
It was the most awkward and blatant fishing attempt heâd ever seen. Alex didnât have grace for that kind of game, a thing he loved about her.Â
âWell, funny storyââ
âThat starts with a threesome?â
âWhat?â
âOoh, are you starting to squirm?â she giggled, looking actually gleeful. âYouâll look like an asshole if you run away and leave me mid-song.â It was the second song but he didnât point that out because obviously he wasnât going anywhere.
âIâm not running away, I justâ what are youââ His eyes narrowed. âWhoâs been telling you what?â
âJust a little birdââ
âAleeeeex,â he leaned a little closer to sound serious and insisted, âJust ask me what you want to know.â
âYou arenât dating Anita, right?â
He snorted, âNo, Iâm not dating Anita.â Her eyes looked so dark and sparkly when she looked up at him from this angle, and he thought she might be a little serious right now too. âIâm not dating anyone, if anyone wants to know.â
âRight, you donât date.â
âIââ
âYou donât go to a party or a wedding with someone, but you always leave with one. Or two, if itâs your birthday!â
âOk, thatâs not quite what you think.â
âWhat do I think?â she asked, and duck-lip pouted again, and looked up at him with challenge. He started to feel nervous for other reasons now, like this was rocky and whatever this was might be about to break apart. He couldnât tell if she was seriously amused or not because all these years heâd always thought she was amused but maybe she hadnât been if she had secret romantic feelings for him. Actually maybe Alex was really good at hiding things from him.
âAre you mad?â
âNo, youâre a free man to do whatever you want.â
âOur birthday party⊠ah,â he sighed, and looked away again and shuffled her to the side so they could move further from the speakers and hear each other better without having to talk so loudly anyone else could overhear. âI was really sad and got too drunk because you werenât there. Maybe I did um⊠ask Anita and Seychelle to go home with me⊠I was drunk enough to shoot my shot.â He grimaced. âThey took me home and put my drunkass right to bed and then fucked on our couch.â
âWhat?!â Alex gasped and pulled away and let out a cackle of a laugh. âNo!âÂ
âYeahâŠ. I guess I cried and then fell asleep in the car or somethingâŠâ He hated admitting the pathetic truth but felt like maybe it was better that she understood ok, maybe he had tried to have a threesome on his birthday, but it was because heâd wanted something wild to soothe his broken heart, not because his feelings about her werenât true.
âNo, we said no sex on the couch!â she laughed and hit him on the arm as if heâd done the deed.
âWell I didnât have sex on the couch! They did it without me!â
They were too loud and people looked over at them but her laughter was a relief.Â
âOh my god that is so embarrassing for you⊠I was going to tease you about finally getting the threesome of your dreams but this is way better! I mean, not the part about you drunk crying, butâŠâ
âYeah yeah⊠as long as youâre happy about itâŠâ he grumbled.
âBut damn, Seashellâs really moving through our group, huh? What do you think, would she like me in this dress? She didnât seem interested in me when IââÂ
She held her arms up in dance position again, a childish wordless request to resume dancing, and he nearly tripped in his haste, sliding into her space again.Â
âDonât talk to Seashell,â he interrupted.Â
âAhhh, are you jealous because she outfucked you?â
âWhat does that mean?â
âI donât know, are you feeling competitive? Sheâs getting more sex than you from your own friendsââ
âI donât want sex with my friends,â he snorted. âUh⊠most of themâŠâ Shit, was it better to say that or not say that?
âI knew you and Taehyung were a little too closeââ
âAlex,â he whined and laughed and pinched her shoulder. âDonât spread rumors about me.â
âYeah, I know, you hate attention, huh?â He scowled. She returned his stare. He loved her so deeply it made him want to laugh and slap his own face. How had he not understood what this feeling was in moments like this? Because these moments werenât new.Â
She was the one to continue, âWell, I suspected you werenât dating Anita, but I did think you got your threesome. Iâm both relieved and sad for you.â
âRelieved, huh? Why, jealous? You were getting railed plentyââ
âOk, letâs not quite say it like that,â she rolled her eyes.Â
âBut would you be? Jealous?â he pressed, desperate for her to say yes.
She shrugged, âI donât know. I had just turned you down.â
âYeah. Broke my heart,â he joked though it wasnât a joke.
She retaliated, âBesides, if I let myself get jealous every time you fucked a girlâŠâ
âBut did you? Feel that way every time?â The question was too serious. Oops. It had rolled off his tongue without him thinking it through. Before she could answer, he teased, âWhatever, I had a bunch of swings and misses in a row. And yet here you are, alone at the wedding you wanted a date for.â
Her voice had the same wistful, teasing tone to it when she added, âDancing badly with you in front of everyone even though you wanted to be left alone so you could find a bridesmaid to fuck.â
âAh, shit, you really know how to punch a guy in the nuts.â
âI just said the truth!â
âNo,â he insisted. âThe truth is Iâm right where I want to be right now.â
âThatâs not what you said back then,â she sang. She was still trying to keep it light. He appreciated that. He could also appreciate there was some fair muscle behind these jabs as they circled each other and tried to suss out the updates, the truths, the right nows.
âYeah, but I was an asshole back then,â he said. âIâm a changed man now.â
âMm-hm.â
âTurns out I donât like you leaving me alone.â
âYeah,â she snorted. He wasnât actually sure what she meant by that, but she was still in his arms and didnât actually seem mad so heâd take it. Actually, what he didnât want to say was that he was thrilled other people were seeing them dance together for going on a third song now. He was psyched that people passed them or glanced over at them and in their minds saw a more permanent connection between him and Alex, the kind that didnât end with after a single song. Maybe they were thinking oh, theyâre together, thatâs cute. Maybe they were thinking damn thatâs an attractive couple.
âJungkook.â
âYes,â he responded to the summons from his drifting thoughts. Her bangs had fallen down again and without thinking about it, he brushed them back to the side. She caught his hand and twisted the other so she had both hands in her grasp, commanding his attention.
âI broke up with my boyfriend two and a half weeks ago and I still feel kind of shitty about it.â
âOh.â
âWe donât have to talk about it. It just sucks to know I wasnât my best self and I was kind of selfish and shitty in the end and⊠itâs really embarrassing when someone sees the bad parts of you, you know?â
âYeah. I know.â
âI mean, he was a great boyfriend. He did everything right and he was kind and thoughtful andââ
âOk, I know. He was the best guy to ever walk the earth. I got it. I saw itââ
âYeah and I keep breaking up with these great guys and just forâŠâ
For me. Say for me, he pleaded in his mind. But the new song was louder and people started jumping behind her. He tugged her close and spun so she was on the outside of the dance floor, safe from being bumped or nudged. It was harder to hear though over the louder music. He leaned down to hear whatever she might say next but he must have leaned too close because she blinked at him in surprise.
And then she lifted onto her toes and took hold of his shoulders and kissed him. Rushed and clumsy, full of uncertainty, and obvious impulse . Her lips just pressed to his, hurried, without any plan.Â
It was the best kind of kiss Jungkook hadnât even hoped for.Â
A kiss!
She kissed him!
He slid his arms quickly around her to keep her steady as she teetered, maybe trying to pull away too quickly.
Impulse kiss? He wouldnât leave her wondering if it was welcome.
âGet back here,â he murmured and chased her mouth, the only action his brain could handle right now as bright lights and warmth flooded his consciousness. Soft, full, sweet-tasting glossy lips against his and heâd never felt so inexperienced in his life. Her hands pressed to either side of his neck, little electric shocks at every point of contact between their bodies, at the touch of her fingers, of her lips, of her nose squashed against his.Â
She pulled away and he couldnât have said for his life how long the kiss lasted. An hour? A second? Someone jostled against his back but Alex was staring at his face as if searching for something so he remained rooted to the spot in case she was going to kiss him again.Â
No, she was really studying him, and it made him nervous now.
âWhat?â he asked, eyes narrowing to hide how naked that stare made him feel.
âNo regrets? No puking? Did that feel like kissing your sister?â
He was shocked by her bluntness. God, he loved Alexâs bluntness. After so many months of the confusion and disappointment and feeling like a fucking idiot to have realized his own feelings too late and worrying heâd been hurting her all along if she had allegedly loved him for so long, the way she poked at the painful parts just felt so comforting and familiar. It brought the important things right into focus. They joked about things. They could joke. And he knew her well enough to see the serious part of the joke. Because they did know each other, they shared a language and an understanding that went way back, that was true even if they were still learning new things about each other and themselves.
âI donât know, I wasnât thinking about that, let me see again,â he said, and leaned in. There was a laugh in the kiss this time though; he swallowed her giggles as her fingers brushed his cheek, and she sort of curled away but not really. It was like the kiss tickled her but she didnât actually want to escape, thatâs what it was like. Her lips were slower this time, more comfortable against his, he thought. He kept his face near hers even though he had to hunch and admitted lowly, âI donât have a sister but Iâm pretty sure I wouldnât kiss one like this.â
âNo? It seems to work in Game of Thronesââ
âHave you even watched that show?â
âNo! Iâm not paying for HBO!â
Jungkook started laughing and couldnât stop. It was embarrassing but joy and relief just suddenly bubbled over and he couldnât stop it. Kissing her left him giddy. High. He had no choice but to drag her in for a hug, or maybe she stepped closer on her own, and he just molded around her, tucking her into his body. So many months of brokenness and the absence of her and uncertainty about whether heâd ever even get to laugh with her again healed as she stepped right back into the Alex-shaped hole in his heart. He closed his eyes and let the wedding fade even further into the background and just existed in this moment with his cheek pressed to the top of her head.
âI really missed you,â he thought she said against his chest.
He let out a long, slow breath, and then, âI know.â
She laughed and punched him in the back, ââI know?â Ok Han Solo! Thatâs not what you say!â
âNo, I did too! I mean I know because I did too!â
âUh huh.â
He squeezed her so tight and breathed in the scent of her shampoo even though it was different than the one she used before and he wondered if that was permanent or temporary. He didnât know. He still didnât really know anything except that kissing her was a Good Thing. Â
Sometimes it was fun to joke but sometimes they needed to be serious, he was learning that, so he pulled away enough to cradle her face and kiss her forehead through her messy bangs and breathed, âI really missed you, Alex.âÂ
Her hands circled his wrists and he felt the pressure of her leaning into the kiss. Another Good Thing.Â
Then she quickly leaned away and laughed, âOk, well good, Iâm glad you didnât forget me.â All jokes again, her whole demeanor as though they hadnât just shared the kind of kisses that changed everything about a day, a relationship, a life trajectory. Ah, fuck, he wanted to just brush the bangs back from her face and kiss her again and tickle her so sheâd kick him and he could twist her around to protect himself and wrap her up tighter in his arms and whisper things at her ear to make her yell at himâ
âUh, I think we should goâ to our friends overâ umââ She grabbed his wrist and took off, weaving through the crowd of dancers. He didnât even understand where they were going, still too flustered by his own thoughts, by the briefest glimpse of that roaring want for Alex that had cracked open now because sheâd kissed him. On purpose. She had initiated all of that!
Did she regret it now? Was she trying to escape? But she was holding his wrist, dragging him along with her. If she was escaping, she was taking him too. That was cute.Â
Somehow despite the limits of her height, she found her way to the group of their friends dancing on the far side of the dance floor. They didnât seem to think anything was off but Jungkook could feel Alexâs energy even from behind; she squeezed his wrist and released him, walked straight through their group, and made a beeline for the open bar.
Halfway there she stopped and turned and caught his eye âeasily because heâd been watching her still, trying to decide if she was fleeing a mistake or just feeling as overwhelmed as he was right now. She pointed at the bar and at him, a question on her face. He nodded and shrugged to answer that he knew sheâd think next what do you want? Should he go with her? Probably, right? Or he should offer to get the drinks?
But she wanted a breath, he felt like that was true. Sheâd fled, but not completely, just for a moment.Â
Ah, had he kissed her really good? He grinned at the possibility that he was better at it than sheâd expected. Wait, had she doubted him?! That hadnât even been his best. He would kiss her breathless next time, until he felt her wobbling in his arms. Heâd kiss her until she gasped or moaned or whimpered âwhich kind of noise would she make? Heâd find out!
Though in fairness, she was way way way better at kissing than he had expected. Way better. Wow. Damn. He hadnât expected Alex to give the kind of kisses that lingered on your lips for this long; he could still feel the tingles. It all felt a little fake with her gone and it wasnât like he understood all that had just happened but at least it seemed like Alex was back in his life and he was along for whatever that ride was. Apparently it would involve kisses.
Single. Single Alex. Only a couple weeks single so maybe she wasnât wanting to jump right into something. Ok. Ok, but she had kissed him so⊠he was on her mind. That was a good place to be. Hands on her body was good. Lips on hers was goodâ
Fuck, he was grinning too big and his friends were looking at him suspiciously. He knew that look, like they thought heâd wandered off and fucked someone in a closet. This was better!
His dance moves werenât cool, they were mindless and distracted. He couldnât help it. He let the joy run through his body, braided with nerves, anticipation of whatever was to come with Alex. He had no fucking clue! But maybe something! Maybe? Unless heâd scared her off?
She came back with drinks âplum wine for them each. He felt his ego swell when she handed him his glass. She was going to taste so good to kiss againâ he choked on a too-big gulp of his wine as she slid past him, her own wine glass in hand, and leapt into the center of their friends with a shout. All bright, happy, fun Alex. Alex letting loose. Alex who caught his gaze again because he didnât want to look anywhere but her and then covered her face and turned shyly away.
Shit he loved her a lot, and it didnât feel painful anymore. Just warm and eager and hopeful. Was he making her shy? Should he flirt with her and see if he could make her really shy?
He knocked back the rest of his wine, too fast, so heâd have his hands free as he rejoined the circle of his friends to show off his own moves. If their friends noticed anything different about either one of them⊠so what?
***
Well shit. Shit shit shit. Shit fucking shit.
Alexâs plans were derailed almost as soon as sheâd set them into motion.
Because what the fuck was up with that forehead kiss? And the way heâd pulled her into his arms and just held her?
Fuck!
And the way heâd kissed her, all soft lips and gentle hands and this little rushed warm breath that sheâd felt more than heard because of the loud music.
Why was he so earnest suddenly? So different? It was terrifying! What if Jungkook was actually a very sweet, loving, sincere boyfriend?! Obviously that didnât come from experience, what if that was just who he was when it came down to it? Would she actually be surprised? But heâd just been such a fuckboy for so longâŠ
She just hadnât expected the warmth. She hadnât expected him to be so serious. She hadnât expected to get so instantly wrapped up in him and so yeah, she needed some air, and some wine, and then some more air, and then some running around with just Rebekah, avoiding her sister who would probably say something just to set her off, and Jungkook off at a safe distance.Â
She was afraid Jungkook would kiss her again. She was afraid heâd ask her a blunt question she wasnât ready to answer yet. She was afraid he wouldnât ask her anything at all and sheâd be disappointed.Â
She just needed to figure out a few things first. Sheâd had a couple weeks now both to process the sadness about ending her relationship with Hoseok and think honestly about what she needed before attempting anything more with Jungkook: She needed some answers she could be sure werenât lies. She needed to see if the feelings were there and authentic ânot just companionship and comfort and familiarity, but romance, desire. Lust.Â
She just wanted to be lusted after, ok? Specifically by Jungkook.
She wanted a sense of how hard sheâd have to work to shape her previous friendship with Jungkook into something that more resembled the kind of relationship she wanted with a romantic partner.
And yeah she had not expected kisses like that, just right there in front of everyone! Her kiss had been impulsive but heâd pushed it further! Good luck fucking a bridesmaid now! (hehe) And she had not expected him to just hold her like that. Or sweetly kiss her forehead.Â
Fuck, she was melting and they hadnât even talked about whether there was the possibility of something between them. Her plans were wavering âbecause yes, sheâd come with plans. Sheâd dressed for plans. She had really uncomfortable underwear on for plans!
âAh, my handsome sexy man,â Sabina cooed, spotting Taehyung across the ballroom. It was getting late, though the party was still going in full swing. Taehyung, Jungkook, and Jimin had their hands on each other's shoulders, dancing in a little circle, kicking their feet. After a moment, she realized Jimin wasnât actually on the ground; Taehyung and Jungkook were holding him up. It was ridiculous. They were so ridiculous. But hearing Sabina so affectionately claim Taehyung, Alex felt that tug in her chest towards Jungkook. My handsome sexy man?
No. That couldnât be right. It sounded impossible that she could ever claim Jungkook as hers. Well, in a way sheâd always claimed him as hers, while also knowing that possessiveness she felt about him wasnât an actual romantic claim. Sheâd never been an option. When all eyes in the room noticed him, his scanned for the hottest woman around and off he went with her, and that woman was never Alex.
âLetâs go dance again,â Sabina suggested, grabbing Alexâs arm. The woman had eternal stamina. Alexâs own was flagging, and she cast about for Rebekah to hold her back, but her traitor friend had wandered off somewhere else. The roadbump of her own sulky thoughts prickled her skin as she and Sabina drew closer âas she saw a woman lean in close to ask Jungkook something and he laughed and waved her off. Had it been a proposition?! Just out of the blue! Probably, right? Jungkook was that kind of hotâŠ
See, the jealousy was going to be a problem. If Alex didnât have confidence, if she didnât feel like she could trust Jungkookâs attention was sincere, it wasnât going to work, and that was part of the test. She was tired of being jealous.Â
He yawned, and then saw her and covered his mouth, nodding his head as he tried to laugh at himself. She had to yell to be heard over the music as she got close,
âLong day?â
âIâm rallying,â he said, sliding his hand around to her back. It felt⊠assertive? Possessive? Predatory? But in a good way, attentive, likeâ
Like he was putting on moves and she was the target.
She leaned into that same energy, or tried to, and slid her hand up to his chest as she asked, âCare for another dance?â
âYou like dancing with me, huh?â he grinned. She must have seemed as cool as she didnât feel on the inside. She nodded. He didnât even look back at their friends as he tugged her a few steps away and against him, sliding his fingers up her arm to take her hand in his. It was so casually, familiarly done, as if theyâd been dancing together like this for years. He just seemed so cool about it all, much cooler than earlier.
âAre you drunk?â she guessed.
âMe? No. Are you?â
âNope.â
He began to lead her in steps, just small, easy, totally off beat at first but a slower song started and it was easier to move at that pace. She kept looking up at him and then away, embarrassed to make eye contact, afraid heâd read her plan too easily.
Alex was going to see if heâd take her home and have sex with her.
Because sheâd know right away this last part that she wasnât so sure about: can he desire me? Or am I just a challenge, a novelty, and heâll be done with me once heâs gotten what he wants?
Right now, he was single and hot and in a position of visibility at this wedding. There were tons of gorgeous women here. If he didnât want to take her home from a public place where hot women would see them leave together, well that was that then. And sheâd be taking a piece of advice from Jungkookâs own book, right? Have sex early, see if he means it.Â
Was it good advice? Bad? Honestly, that didnât matter. Maybe it was a stupid idea. Could Jungkook be with her even when she did dumb things? Could she be embarrassingly herself with him? Could she feel comfortable admitting this insecurity to him and feel genuinely reassured, if he wanted her to be?Â
But also.
But also: Could Alex be the woman Jungkook Jeon chose to take him with him? Could he want to fuck her?
He was smiling about something, she noticed. She didnât ask but he leaned down closer to her ear and mused,
âYouâre thinking really hard about something.â
âMaybe.â
âWhatâs up? What are you so serious about? It doesnât matter if we get off beatââ
âNo, not that.â
âOk.â
She hesitated. No, it was pathetic. The rejection would be brutal. She shouldnât say anything, she should just enjoy whatever dances she could have with him. Maybe she could steal another kiss later. That was still progress. That was still incredible. This wedding was magical and over the top and exhausting and she could carry away those precious moments they had together earlier as her souvenir and figure out the rest another day. Or maybe heâd ask her later to go home with him? Thatâs what she really would have preferred⊠but what if he didnât? She did realize he might not, just out of kindness or respect, even if he wanted to. He might be trying to keep giving her the space she had asked him for months ago, even though he knew she was single now, even though sheâd kissed him.Â
âAlex, what is it?â he asked, and this time brushed her hair back over her shoulder. The feathery touch and the soft gesture made her shudder.Â
Ok but⊠couldnât she be the girl who got railed after a wedding for once? Couldnât the hottest guy here take her home? This hot guy? Who kept looking at her so closely and smelled so nice and had his hands firm against her back and around her fingers?
Fuck, he was so beautiful to look at. Sheâd kissed him now and she wanted more. She wanted him. She wanted him to want her. She wanted so badly for this specific dream to come true, tonight, and worried she had only set herself up for failure. The want left her breathless. It seemed impossible theyâd already kissed, and even more impossible theyâd ever kiss again.
Could he ever feel this way when he looked at her?
In a poor attempt at self restraint, she avoided blurting out will you take me home and fuck me, substituted instead for the almost worse request,
âWill you kiss me here?â Followed by her hand lifting off his arm and tapping the side of her neck.
Fucking hell, what had gotten into her?!
And worst/best/worst of all, he did it. He didnât even ask what the fuck she was on about. Without any hesitation, he leaned all the way down to press his warm mouth against the skin she had tapped. His lips lingered. In all seriousness, Alex felt like she nearly orgasmed alongside the full body shudder that such a blatantly intimate gesture caused. Thank fuck the music was too loud for him to hear the noise that stuck in her throat. She shivered and shirked her shoulders, squirming at the pure overload of pleasure, too much, too too much, it was so ticklish sheâd scream, but the kind of too much you kind of wanted more of.Â
Instead of pulling away when she scrunched her shoulders, his arms just wrapped tightly around her and he chuckled against that sensitive skin and murmured criminally close to her ear, âYeah, I thought that would be too much, youâre so ticklish.â
Damn he knew her so well.Â
And since his face was right there anyway, she turned hers, seeking his mouth. He seemed to realize immediately what she wanted because she didnât have to ask. He brushed her hair back again, wringing another shiver from her that she tried to hide behind running her hands up his chest.
But shit, they were in public! The kiss had only just started but Alex suddenly felt like they were getting wildly out of control and pulled away. Jungkook looked confused and it embarrassed her, the way she ached. So quickly! Tonight was the first night sheâd seen him in so long, since the arcade really âbut memories of that night at the arcade fed the ache, they didnât soothe it even a little. Â
âYouâre not drunk?â he asked, brushing his hands against her face like he was checking for a fever.
âIâm not,â she huffed and brushed his hand defensively away. âI justâŠâ She stared at him. He stared at her. Celebratory shouts somewhere else startled her and his small smile couldnât be anything but endeared.
But suddenly his face took a serious look again and he leaned close, hand firm but careful on her arm as he insisted, âThereâs nothing to be worried about with me, ok? I know you uh⊠you know how I feel about you. And I donât know if you umâ but I know you just broke up with your boyfriend and maybe you need time before you can think about what you want with meâ if you even want anything! And thatâs ok too, so donât worry, Iâm not going to pressure you for answers orââ
âI want to go home with you.â
âHuh?â His lips didnât even part for the noise of surprise but his eyebrows went up and his eyes got wide.
Well shit that didnât sound cool.
âI wantâŠâ God, it wasnât even a test at this point. She saw what she wanted clearly. âI want to be the girl you take home from the wedding.â
âIâm not taking anyone homeââ
âI want you to choose me,â she said. âI want you to take me home with you tonight.â
âTake you home with me andâŠâ She couldnât tell if he was in disbelief, or horrified, or genuinely not following what she was asking for.Â
âTake me home and fuck me, Jungkook, thatâs what I meanââ
âJesus, Alexââ
The sharp pain she felt in that moment stole her breath. She was so proud of herself for being bold and direct about what she wanted but his response felt like a rejection and she knew she sounded far less cool as she admitted,
âI thought you said you want that with meââ
âOh, I do,â he said with an unexpected chuckle. âI do want to do that but I want more than that with you, Alex, and I donât want to ruin the chance of more just because I got horny and impatientââ
âNo, but I asked you to.â
âI know butââ
âOk,â she said, and made to step back because this was mortifying. He caught hold of her quickly, pulling her close and saying near her ear,
âPlease donât look like that, itâs not that I donâtââ
âItâs ok if you donât wantââ
âAlex I canât say the things I want to do to you because itâll freak you out and I wonât risk my chance with you when Iâm not even sure yet that youâre giving me a chance and weâre at this nice wedding and people will overhear and Iâll get kicked out and Jimin will never forgive me.â She could feel his lips brushing the edge of her ear as he spoke, his warm breath ghosting across the shell of her ear and the side of her neck. She felt completely consumed by him for just a moment, just like she wanted. His hands tightened on her body. She felt the intensity in his words. âTrust me, the way you look tonight is driving me fucking crazy and if you werenât you Iâd already have you overâ but not because I donât want you like thatââ Obvious panic broke through the sexual heat of what he was saying as he overthought his own words. Alex hadnât even been thinking he meant that. She was having a hard time breathing as all the blood rushed down her body and her heartbeat pounded painfully between her legs.
She kissed him, afraid sheâd say something pathetic. She just wanted him to touch her right now. Sheâd take the closet or the backseat of the car or whatever, no wonder Jungkook got any woman he wanted saying things like this in that way, his gaze so dark and sparkly like that. She felt wild with want. And he was looking at her like that, which felt wild too. She felt like they were practically fucking on the dance floor, just right in front of everyone, standing so still and wrapped around and whispering to each other like this, lost in each other. Someone was going to complain about public indecency and kick them out.
âYouâd already have me what? What would you do if I wasnât me?â she prodded, keeping her face hidden by his shoulder so she could try and catch his breath. What had she been thinking, asking a question like that to try and catch her breath to?
âI want more than that with you.â
âMore than what?â
âMore thanâŠâ She felt him lick his lips. âMore than finding some coat closet and dragging that dress of yours up andâ donât ask me these questions, itâs mean.â
âWhy is it mean?!â
âYah, youâre driving me crazy. Weâre at a wedding, in front of everyone, our friends are looking for usââ
âOh, youâre feeling shy?â she teased.
Instead of laughing, he paused before pulling away to look into her face as he admitted, âI want more than a wedding night one night stand with you but is that all you want from me?â
Fuck. What a tragic question. She saw it all written there on his face. He might as well have thrown a bucket of ice water over her head.
âI want both,â she answered as honestly as she could. âI want you to want to take me home for the night and do all those crazy things to me that have the instagram girls lining up to suck your dick and I want to wake up in your shirt the next morning and kick you in the butt until you make me breakfast andââ
âI want that too,â he said and took hold of her arms. âI want all of that too, Alex. I want all of that with you too. Everything we had before but also with the fucking and sucking andââ
âSeriously with your mouth?â she started to laugh. Because Jesus he was such a fuckboy with that mouth of his! He started laughing too and they curled together and she could still feel her heart pounding in various places throughout her body but she could breathe through it now, relieved that he was not actually rejecting her yet. The deepest sigh of relief rushed out but she wasnât actually sure if it came from her body or his.
He was trying to be sweet. And thoughtful. And careful.
And now this confession was out in the open, in the very small space between their bodies.
In that moment, it was impossible not to look at his behavior, how he had been in the last few months, and not see how clearly different he had always treated her compared to other women as a good thing. This wasnât the thought or effort or emotion he put into those women. This wasnât a desperate grab for controlling a co-dependent friendâs time. This was a side of Jungkook he was showing only to her, that she had always seen some element of. Alex was special to him. She felt special to him.Â
Test passed. Even without the fucking.
âOk,â she said. âI wonât sexually harass you anymoreââ
âWait no!â
âI mean I wonât pressure you into taking me home, just because it was my fantasyââ
âWait no,â he said again, grinning at her giggles as he took her hands. âWhat do you mean it was your fantasy?â
âSorry, I canât hear you over the music!â
âAlex!â
She began to walk away and he, as she had predicted, dove after her, and wrapped his arms around her in a burst of old playful closeness. He laughed at her shoulder, forearms digging into her stomach, and while she noticed the softness, she didnât feel self conscious about it at all.Â
Jungkook wanted to fuck her in a coat closet. Her. That was cool. He wasnât doing it but he said he wanted to, and instead he was wrestling with her on the dance floor in the middle of a very expensive wedding, so that still counted for something.
âOk ok ok you two,â Namjoon said, clapping his hands. âYouâre making the grandmas clutch their pearls.â
Alex escaped from Jungkookâs grasp with a victory shout and spun a circle around Namjoon. As if heâd actually read her mind, Jungkook caged Namjoon in on the other side and they both started to grind and booty-bump their much taller friend.
âHey. Guys. Guys! Ok, very funny!â He looked like he was going to flee this embarrassing display, but suddenly Inâam and Jimin ran up to join and it wasnât like Namjoon could flee them, they were the guests of honor!
Alex just felt so happy and free. When she caught Jungkookâs eye as he danced and laughed and rough-housed with his friends, she felt like a connection she had always depended on too much was in fact now real and safe and recognized. It wasnât like they were even a thing yet but they were going to be, right? Thatâs what all this meant? That had just been a confession, right? They both wanted each other and short of giving it a try and realizing they were very wrong or very incompatible or something right awayâ
He wouldnât let her down. Probably theyâd both fuck up a lot but yeah, thatâs how it went, right? If he kept crinkling his nose at her like that though she could forgive a lot of fuck ups.
Rebekah nudged her arm and wiggled her eyebrows. Just that was enough to make Alex cover her face, overwhelmed and embarrassing and giddy. She shirked her shoulders and held her hands out and grimaced.
âGood for you,â Rebekah smiled and flung her arm around Alexâs shoulder. âHe better treat you right.â
âWhat!â
âYou heard me. I may not seem like much but I can fightââ
âRebekahhhh, are you drunk?â Alex giggled.
âA little bit.â
âThanks for telling me things even if you werenât sure if Iâd want to hear them. I appreciate your honesty.â
âOh yes, uh huh. Iâm a pretty good friend.â
âAnd thanks for not trying to fuck my best friend.â
âWell, to be fair, he wouldnât have gone for it anyway,â Rebekah admitted.
âNo, thatâs not true! Youâre a vixen! The only thing that kept him safe was your loyalty to me, I know thatââ
âYes, thatâs it! I barely even noticed he was hot.â
âI think youâre hanging out with May and Minxi too much, you get sassy when you drink now,â Alex laughed, swinging her around. Actually, the past six months had given her the chance to get closer with Rebekah too. There were lots of good things happening in her life. She was very loving and grateful for everything right now.Â
âThanks for reminding me Iâm still single.â
âHey, I am too!â
âFor like fifteen more minutes.â
Alex just laughed because she didnât know what else to say. No, that wasnât it. They werenât talking about that! Yet! Damn, she felt drunk, but the only thing she knew to do to comfort Rebekah was dance until her friend was laughing again. Did she know anyone she could introduce Rebekah to? No, sheâd be a terrible matchmaker. Wait, but Jungkook knew so many people. Ok. A nice little project for them to do togetherâŠ
Alex glanced over and happened to notice Yoongi sitting at the table by himself, gaze trained on his phone. This was notable for several reasons. The first of course being that Alex had initially been so worried about showing up dateless to a wedding Yoongi would be at and now instead she didnât care at all, but Yoongi had also shown up dateless and allegedly fiance-less now. The second being, if he was so bored, why was he still here?
She needed a break from the dancing and the noise and the whirlwind of emotions that wrapped her and Jungkook up everytime they were on the dance floor, so she wove her way through the chairs and collapsed in the seat beside Yoongi.
âHey.â
âOh, hey,â he greeted and lowered his phone. Then jerked his head towards the dancefloor and joked, âGood to see some progress after⊠how many years has it been?â
âAish, come on,â she laughed.
âNever knew you could be so handsy but I guess it just had to be with the right guy,â he added. There was nothing mean or hurt in his voice though, more just relaxed. Teasing. Casual.Â
She nodded and shrugged, âMaybe. Maybe Iâm just affected by the wedding. Whatâs gong on with you lately? Heard youâre around a lot more these days.â
âThat a problem?â
âFor me? No, of course not. Weâre cool. I mean, youâre the one who might still be pining over meââ
âNah, Iâm over it.â
âOk you could act a little more nostalgic for me,â she laughed.
âSorry. Guess Iâm a littleâŠâ He just waved his hand, a meaningless gesture.
Her sympathy was sincere as she offered, âYeah, I heard you went through a recent breakup too but⊠bigger magnitude. Engaged.â
âYeah, Iâm aware.â
âSorry,â she grimaced. Maybe she shouldnât have repeated what Sabina told her.Â
âEh. It was mutual, I guess. You know⊠sometimes other people can put a name on your feelings before you can do it yourself, you know?â
Her eyes narrowed as she said slowly, â.... YesâŠâ She followed his line of sight, easy to trace: to Namjoon. âOh my god,â she gasped and grabbed his arm. âAre you in love with Namjoon?! Does he know?!â
âRaquel sure thought so.â
âAnd was she wrong?â
âYou and Jungkook boyfriend-girlfriend now?â
âHey now.â
Yoongi snickered, âYeah, maybe weâll trade answers someday.â
âMaybe tomorrow morning? See you at breakfast?â Alex giggled. She wasnât even embarrassed by her bawdry joke; she laughed at Yoongiâs surprised face. âCome on, that was objectively funny.â
âEh.âÂ
âIt was! Me? With that kind of an ego? Us, exes, winding up with roommates? Oooh that would be so good, youâre such a good cook, just like Seokjin wasââ
âGoodbye, Alex,â he said bluntly, but he was laughing at his phone as she stood up and looked around, feeling all her energy restored. Ready for another round of wedding. She could go all night at this rate. This was fun! Even unexpected closure and friendliness with Yoongi? What a great fucking night!
*
Where was Alex? Refrain of his night. If she wasnât right against him, Jungkook was looking for her. He wanted to know where she was. He wanted to be able to reach her at any moment. Every kiss, every dance, every touch left him desperate for more.Â
The relief that came from being able to ground himself with her again was shockingly normal. Heâd expected to feel awkward with her longer. A little nervous still, sure. But for all the anticipation heâd felt in the last few months at the thought of interacting with the girl he had a crush on, that girl was still Alex. Who made inappropriate jokes and kicked him when he teased her and scrunched her shoulders up exactly like heâd expected to when he kissed her neck after sheâd asked him to. Alex who he could communicate with in a glance, and who made him laugh with a look, and swung between being the life of the party and then sneaking off for some alone time because it was too much.
Alex who had fucking shocked him to the core asking to go home with him.
And heâd said no!?!??
What the fuck was wrong with him?!
He was just in shock. He had hoped just to be near her tonight and instead theyâd kissed and danced together and kissed more and then she brought up that and it just seemed like asking for too much. It made the evening veer into the unrealistic; this had to just be a dream, right?Â
Fuck, her little gasp when heâd kissed her neck. What had compelled her to ask for that? Of course heâd done it. God he wanted to hold her down and do it again, really make her gasp and squirm and cry out and cumâ
Ok, he had not expected her to be so open and straightforward and just break his brain like this tonight. He was barely handling the dress! Be nicer to me, Alex. When did you get so mean?!
He ought to step back. He kept trying to put space so he could think rationally about the right thing to do. No short term thinking with Alex. He wanted the whole thing, the long term, the big picture with her. No just giving in to what he wanted to do when he had her in his grasp right now. He wanted to show he was mature and serious and respectful. Sheâd just had a breakup. He didnât want to be a rebound.
Was she just on the prowl? Was that why sheâd dressed so good and had so much confidence? She danced without abandon. She joined anything she was called to. She was clearly having a fantastic night and she had admitted she wanted to get taken home by someone andâ
No, but she hadnât said someone, sheâd asked him to take her home andâŠ
And, you know, fuck her. Alex. His best friend. Who heâd been longing to do just that to for months now.Â
Who even needed alcohol when a sexy woman in a velvet dress had you by the balls and you were standing there trying to decide whether to just let her or resist for some higher thinkingâŠ
Both? Could they really have both? She said she wanted bothâŠÂ
Fuck, this woman was driving him crazy!Â
Jiminâs brother and Taehyung had snagged him to get all the bags of eco-friendly confetti ready for people to chuck at Jimin and Inaâm to cap off the night. It was after two in the morning, and Jungkook was shocked at how many of the guests were still here. Even older guests! He overheard talk about moving the party somewhere else. Party to sunrise, apparently! Jungkook was exhausted after the work and emotions and and just everything of the day.
But as he shepherded guests past the table to grab the baggies and out to the circle drive where the limousine waited for Inâam and Jiminâs ceremonial departure (they were staying at this hotel and would circle back after a drive around the city), Jungkook realized the night was coming to an end. Soon the wedding would be wrapped and heâd be free of groomsmen duties, free to go home, time to say goodbye to Alex and what, just hope all this stuck? That the next time they saw each other, she still wanted to kiss him? Was this his one opportunity and if he didnât seize it, sheâd be onto someone new tomorrow? It didnât sound like Alex but neither did kissing him in the middle of the dance floor, neither did asking him to take her home and fuck her, neither didâ this was just uncharted territory here. He didnât know. He didnât know what he was doing here! He just knew he couldnât let her leave without some assurance that this had not all been a dream. He didnât want the night to end ever.
âEveryoneâs ready!â Taehyung called up the line from the circle drive to Jungkook, standing in the center of the path. Jungkook waved a thumbâs up to the hotel entrance to pass along to the newlyweds. Heâd been looking for Alex to stand next to but couldnât find her.Â
The shouting started and people began to throw the heart-shaped white confetti and shout and music played as Inâam and Jimin came out of the hotel, hand in hand. Jungkook had to wedge himself in at the end of the sidewalk. He ripped his own cone of confetti open to toss, and in doing so, glanced directly across the path, where Alex stood with Sabina and Rebekah and Namjoon and Yoongi and maybe more of their friends, all shouting and throwing confetti but Jungkook really only saw Alex. It was like magic, seeing her big smile as confetti floated down between them and camera flashes went off and people shouted. He really thought time slowed down.
Yeah, there was no way he was going to remember Jiminâs wedding as the night he didnât take Alex home. They didnât have to have sex! They could eat junk food and play video games until the sun came up. They could pass out the second they got to his bedroom. He could sleep on the couch if she changed her mind. But he was going to drag tonight out for every second he could.
Alex had a fantasy of being the woman he took home? Heâd be a fucking idiot not to make that come true.
So as soon as Jimin and Inâam were in the limo, Jungkook darted across the path and grabbed her hand and dragged her back from the line of partygoers.
âItâs all in my hair!â she laughed, shaking her head, brushing it off her shoulders.Â
Jungkook brushed it out of her bangs and asked as casually and no-pressure as he could, âHey, want to come home with me?âÂ
Her eyebrows raised and he felt a moment of panic. Hadnât she said thatâs what she wanted earlier?! Shit! Shit shit shit!
âReally?â she asked, and crossed her arms âunder her tits. âThatâs how Jungkook Jeon gets women to go home with him? Thatâs your game? You sound soââ
âHuh? Whaâ well butâ yeah but Iâm not putting moves on you,â he defended.Â
âUm, ouch.â
âYou want me to put moves on youâ butâ but I already told you that youâre more than thatââ
âDamn. How did you ever get laid?â
âIâm just trying to tell you that thereâs no pressure to have sex or anything, you can just come over and we can get fries on the way home or somethingâ stop making that face!â he laughed and covered his.Â
She shook her head and admitted, âMy whole world is changing right now. Your instagram is nothing but lies! This is what your game was like in high school! I thought you turned into some superstar fuckboy since thenââ
âFine!â he huffed and turned away from her. His friends were making a point of not noticing them, he could tell. Other people were heading back into the venue to get their things, or going straight out to their cars.Â
He turned back, ready to say something good heâd think of on the spot.
Alex was gone. She had misunderstood! FUCK. Sheâd started to walk back inside. He ran after her, already laughing at his own stupidity. She must have expected heâd follow though because it was easy once he caught her hand to get her to stop walking, and easy to back her up against one of the columns lining the hotel walkway. She was so short, it was easy to rest his elbow above her head and lean in close and trace his fingers down the side of her face to tilt her jaw up.
âOh,â she said.Â
âItâs time to go, babe,â he said. Her lips twitched. She was trying not to laugh. But that felt ok because she admitted,
âDamn, thatâs pretty goodâŠâ And something about the way she swallowed made it seem more like she was nervous than that she thought he was ridiculous.
But then he started to laugh as he realized, âSo uh, you got wheels we can use, babe?â The laughter erupted from her. She doubled forward, hands to his chest; he dropped his hands to her arms.
âYou donât have your car!â
âJimin picked me up this morning!â
âSo we can ride back with Namjoon!â
âHeâll get pissy if Iâm fingering you in the back of hisâ shit, too much?â
âOh.â Her eyes went very big.Â
âUh⊠sorry, I donât know whatâs too much or what you think is funnyââ
âI donât either,â she admitted and he was so fucking endeared by her in the moment. He loved the glimpse of her honesty and uncertainty. It made him feel better about his own. âJust⊠as long as you arenât like making fun of meââ
âNo no, Iâm not. Shit, I fucked it upââ
âNo,â she said, grabbing his arm. âItâs good then. Um⊠treat me like one of your insta girlsââ
âAbsolutely not, I actually care about seeing you again,â he laughed. âBut I will take you home with me and we can just see what uh, what happens.â
âI donât have my car either though. I was planning to go home with someone.â
âWho?â he asked, obviously thinking she meant like Rebekah or something. She just raised her eyebrows. âWha? Who? You better mean meâŠâ
âHmâŠâ
âAlexâŠâ He slid his arms around her and tried to drop his mouth to her neck but she was too quick lifting her shoulders with a squeal.
âSay it was me,â he demanded.
âActually I was hoping Seychelle would be hereââ
âAbsolutely not.â He couldnât suppress his laughter, âCanât risk her converting you.â
âExactly. Iâm ready and willingââ
âDonât say that in public,â he interrupted. âWait until weâre home.â He winked at her, meaning it playful. But he saw the flicker across her face, where she wasnât sure if he was joking or not.Â
Goddamnit. If Alex really wanted that, was he really going to tell her no? Especially when sheâd just admitted she basically planned this. This wasnât a drunk spur of the moment mistake. Sheâd come here so hopeful of himâ really? This was really all on purpose? So then had she really dumped Hoseok for him? She left her car at home for him? Obviously she wouldnât have been stranded completely if things hadnât gone well but⊠but her hope in him made him bolder.
âSo⊠you wore this dress for me too?â he asked, reaching out to finger the sleeve.
She made a face, âUm, I wore this dress because I look amazing in it.â
âYeah, you do.â
âBut maybe I was hoping someone would notice me in it.â
âJust anybody, huh?â
âYeah, just anybody,â she grinned and giggled. It was the girliest heâd ever heard Alex giggle. If heâd been watching her act like this with anyone else, heâd known instantly she had a crush, it was so obvious. Her flirting was just so cute. âYou know, going to a wedding alone, you never know who might be there, maybe you want to celebrate with someone afterwards.â
âWell then youâre lucky I noticed you before some other guy who uh, doesnât know how to make eggs in the morning⊠or something⊠god, why do you keep laughing at me?!â
âIâm just nervous!â she laughed and hit his arm. âIâm not used to being on the receiving end of your game when youâre being serious about it! Well, I mean, you used to try to pull this kind of shit when you wanted something from me but⊠but it didnât make me feel like this before!â
âOh yeah? What do you think changed then?â He let go of her sleeve but realized she must be cold now, still standing outside without her coat.
âI donât know! I guess⊠just⊠because it could go somewhere um different this time⊠I mean different than you just crying because I beat you in Smash againââ
âDonât get too excited, I have been playing a lot of video games lately,â he warned. And slid his arm around her to pull her into his jacket and herded her towards the door.Â
âYeah but Iâm just innately better at it than you.â
âUh huh. Weâll see⊠hey. You know even before all of this,â he mused, âyou were always my favorite woman to leave with.â
âWow.â
âWhat?â
âI donât know, itâs kind of weird to hear you call me a woman instead of just girl or shrimp. Oh my god, does that mean you really have realized Iâm a woman after all these years?!â She was teasing him, the teasing felt so good, he felt giddy all over again. And apparently when he got giddy he wanted to say raunchy things to get a rise out of her.
So he assured her quietly, âOh I know youâre a woman, and whether itâs tonight or another night, I will be more than happy to wring every single orgasm from your little shrimp bodyââ
âThereâs no way this is how you seduce women.â
âYeah but itâs working with you, huh?âÂ
She glared. He was too giddy to even take the kiss he wanted, just tapped her nose because sheâd hate it and ordered, âGo get your coat, babygirl, Iâll get my things andâ wait, how are we getting home again? Hey, Namjoon!â
He had to walk away quickly because calling Alex babygirl didnât feel jokey, it felt new and exciting and yes still jokey but also heavy and intentional and now there was no reason he couldnât call her baby anymore and he was just really excited and ready to get her home. If Namjoon wouldnât stop for fries, maybe he could doordash some on the wayâŠ
Guess what this chapter is too long to fit in a single post so go here for Part B!
Previous Chapter | Masterlist | Next Chapter
#jungkook x oc#jeon jungkook x oc#jungkook smut#jungkook f2l#jungkook x reader#jeon jungkook x reader#bangtan smut#bts smut#jungkook fanfiction#fuckboy au#jungkook angst#jungkook fluff#jungkook series#jungkook/reader#jungkook/oc#jungkook#tellmewhatchanged#tell me what changed#tmwc#fuckboy jungkook#jeon jungkook ff#jungkook fanfic
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Hey now, Let her cook!
#dungeon meshi#chilchuck tims#senshi#laios touden#marcille donato#izutsumi#oyasumi punpun#<- In case you are wondering what the source for the little bird guy is.#Yeah that's right. I'm back to my extremely obscure crossover BS.#Punpun is one of those series that falls under the category of 'Good! but I cannot responsibly recommend this to anyone."#If Dungeon Meshi is like a friend asking you to go on a quick errand and you accidently go on a life changing roadtrip -#Punpun is your friend asking to go on a quick errand and they pull up to the vet and tell you your dog is being put down.#Then they explode into sludge. Melting your car. You hitchhike back but the person who picked you up is an axe murderer.#I could not finish it. My friends who did say it was good. But agree it was for the best I did not finish it.#Hey speaking of tone twists...We are one episode away from one of my favourite chapters being animated!#WHO'S READY FOR THE SENSHI BACKSTORY! WHO IS READY TO CRY!#ME! I AM! I spooked my flatmate with how energetic I was this morning. I'm vibrating with energy I was not designed to contain.#I should talk about today's episode here: It was very good. I love how they animated the familiars.#And!!! Anime only people now are in the loop on the Chilchuck lore. Part 1 of many. He still contains multitudes.#They all do to be honest! If this episode told us anything it was that we still don't know these characters as well as we think!#See you guys next week. I'll be inconsolable.
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I'll rip in hands and teeth and take a bite
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuji itadori#ryomen sukuna#yuuji#sukuna#sukuita#fanart#jjk fanart#gore tw/#body horror tw/#blood tw/#YUUJIIII BABY BOYYYY BABYYYYYY#hes hungry :/#sukuna seems 2 be having fun gdjhfgsdf . boys when theyre bored.#so happy i wrangled this pose in2 something im happy with i almost abandoned the idea entirely#sometimes front facing is the answer.....who knew :'>#also#can anyone tell me. how far up yuujis fun arms go i had no idea so i just stopped them at the elbow#if im wrong that will b not swaggy :(#listening 2 sena's cover of butchers vanity on repeat btw VIBES#cannibalism motifs my beloved uwu#in other news this is the least amount of shading ive done in a very long time#and its been even longer since i pulled out th white lineart#but overall i like this piece so much yuuji is so cute and it doesnt make sense 2 me at all#edit changed the colour to make it more obvious whats sukunas legs vs whats yuujis back
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Columbo and the Knight (1984)
put me in the universe where Columbo ran through the 1980s and had a crossover episode with Knight Rider. I think they deserved it, and I am not just saying that because they're my two favorite Old Shows. @telebeast wrote a little fanfic blurb about it and I HAD to visualize it into a comic (which is also the longest comic I have finished thus far at five pages...), so writing credit goes to them.
Autism W!
#columbo#knight rider#art#michael knight#kitt#comic#highlight reel#crossover#telebeast#there are two small easter eggs here. can you find them. they were somehow not Entirely lost when i resized these for the public#this is what i mean when i say I Draw And It's Everyone Else's Problem. look at my INCREDIBLY niche crossover comic boy#if the knight rider fandom has like 12 people in it. how many of y'all have seen columbo#this comic is for like 4 people and me and phoenix are already two of them#niche is my specialty lets be real. weird niche obscure shit and ships nobody's paid attention to yet#not to suggest this is ship art. columbo has his wife and michael has his car lmfao#stylizing real people is EXTREMELY hard btw sorry for when they get off model. its partly a 'better imperfect than never finished' situatio#cant tell you how much i redrew some of these panels. weeps#this took me 2 weeks but i think i thumbnailed it all in may and the ideas been rollin around in my head since march#is anybody good at editing. please edit michael and columbo into an image together like its a screenshot. NOT generated. edited.#it would be so cool#ive drawn columbo a lot but i haven't drawn a lot of michaels. i was learning things about his outfit AS I WAS DOING THE DAMN#COLORS ON THIS. all the lines done. it was too late to change anything. i did all the lines and colored page by page#i realized my mistakes on like page 3. 1 and 2 were already done. it was Too Late.#imagine it though. them working a case together. switching between the more serious tone of columbo vs the goofier#action antics of michael and kitt. columbo being so impressed by Modern Technology. there's more i could say but phoenix may write#more of this crossover and i don't want to spoil it :'3#there's opportunity here though i swear. there's gold to be dug.#i like how kitt gets shading but columbo's junker peugeot doesn't. kitt looked wrong without any. columbo's car is matte and dirty#i also applied effects to this to make it look a little film-grainy and VHS like. some CRT TV vibes#the only question left is. did they put knight rider into columbo; or columbo into knight rider đ€
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a happy audience is the key to the academy's heart
shadow milk design by @catxolotlquoise
#fate connected them FAR before pv was chosen to be an ancient hero. change my mind#foils in life and death#by this point sm was obv already sealed away. but i like to think he still had an influence on things within the academy#ESPECIALLY pv. because they were destined to share a soul jam and therefore share personality traits interchangeably.#interpret the sm in these dreams as not really being *him* himself#but rather a projection of his younger self who held great pride towards his students#cookie run kingdom#crk#cookie run#vanilla milkshake#shadowvanilla#shadow milk cookie#pure vanilla cookie#white lily cookie#purelily#tell me why i COULD NOT stop listening to my september while making this.#u know what u did crowmise. u know what u did.
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so a few things
my brother and i have our rooms facing each other he recently got a mood light installed and he can change the color his favorite color is purple
which would normally be. FINE but every time i walk to my room its just been this
#get meout get me out hget me OUT. OF HEREEE.#i cant even tell him to change it cuz like what. im gonna make him stop using his favorite color. because of two dumb gay fuckheads#BUT LIKE FOR REAL EVERY TIME. EVERY TIME. I HAVE TO GO TO MY ROOM#ITS LIKE IM WALKING INTO FUCKING SHADWOPEACH CROSSROADS. FUCK#LIKE THAT MEME? THE ONE WITH THE GUY AT A FORKED PATH BETWEEN THE EVIL CASTLE AND SUNNY MEADOW?#THATS ME RN#my road not taken ass going thru it every fucking evening when i have to. WALK TO MY ROOM AND NOT SAY ANYTHING ABT IT#LOSING MY MIND#yapping#diary#doodles#shadowpeach#lmk#lego monkie kid
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The Riddler: Riddle me thi- Is that a fcking kid.
Dick Grayson, a non-native English speaker: What does fcking mean?
The Riddler: Fck- I mean sht- I mean it's a grown up word, ask your dad about it
[A Few Years Later]
The Riddler: Riddle me th- Is that another fcking kid
Jason Todd, raised in Crime Alley his entire life: Who the hll you calling a fcking kid? I'll beat your *ss motherfcker, you and me right now.
The Riddler: Wow you are. Something.
[A Few Years After That]
The Riddler: Riddle me- Where the fck are you getting these children?
Tim Drake, raised in high society but also not raised at all: That's a naughty word sir.
The Riddler: At least you're polite
[A Few More Years Later]
The Riddler: Riddle m- WHY THE FCK DOES THIS ONE HAVE A SWORD!?
Damian Wayne, above silly things like Vulgar Language: I Was Expecting A Battle Of Wits, But You Appear To Be Unarmed.
The Riddler: WHY DOES HE TALK LIKE THAT???
#there is now Bonus Content in the reblogs#DC#Dick Grayson#Jason Todd#tim drake#Damian Wayne#edward nygma#Batfam#incorrect quotes#incorrect dc quotes#this all started with me and my friends going ''riddle me this- is that a fcking kid''#stop telling me to not censor it's a personal choice I've been here nearly ten years#anyway this is what I think they were like at the very beginning#they changed of course but it's very funny to think this#she speks#she speks originale
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the most difficult thing about growing as a person socially, as in getting out of your shell and noticing that you are, is that there will still be times when it doesnât feel like youâve grown at all! times when you canât really connect with anyone around you, times when you fail to enter into an existing conversation, times when you say the wrong thing (or nothing at all when in hindsight you probably shouldâve). but thatâs also kind of the best thing, because thatâs the thing that helps you realize that sometimes, itâs not you or your lack of skills or any shortcoming. sometimes certain environments just arenât for you and certain people arenât your people, and thatâs okay. thatâs human. itâs okay to not feel the progress you have made all the time.
#and that goes for every type of growth#backstory of this post:#after I came back after a few months of doing my international internship I felt so much more confident#it was easier making friends and walking up to people#i took more chances#and generally just heard it a lot from those around me who kept telling me how much iâd changed#this was further supported by my first office job that went pretty well#but then came my grad internship. and while i love the work and have met some great people I noticed it was difficult again#there was one office lunch where no one spoke to me at all! it was my first week and I didnât know what to say#if i should even say anything#we were all sitting at the same table#not one person even glanced my way#it made me doubt myself; i was doing so well before#was that even real? why canât I just speak up? this is not the way to connect with people#especially in my first week!#but you know what#i was still doing well. i just had to factor in the fact that these were all middle aged people talking about reality shows i didnât watch#and bikes i knew nothing about#as well as people who knew i was the new intern yet didnât speak to me at all even though Iâd introduced myself to them all individually#and even so#people I couldnât really talk to about MY interests outside of work either#my point being:#itâs okay to not feel a connection with everyone you meet#itâs okay to fall back into old habits even though youâve developed new ones#it will never unravel the process youâve made and the connections youâve built#youâre doing fine#after this internship I will surround myself with people who reaffirm that belief#growth in the self#self love#positivity
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so glad Oda wasn't afraid of changing him
#one piece#eiichiro oda#as his fish#gol d. roger#pirate king#seems like changes so miniscule#but also so telling#old format? what are you gonna fight me for it? time police?đ€š
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He grabbed my hair in a way that made me understand the difference between rugby and football. bonus ±
#rwrb#rwrbedit#red white and royal blue#alex x henry#firstprince#userninz#userveronika#chrissiewatts#usersteen#usernuria#usermegsb#userclara#userkhael#mine*#this kind of set has been done to death but it hasnt been done by ME.#it's been on my book/movie list for a while#anyway they changed the game with this idk what to tell you#idk who i'd rather be in this situation.............#alex needed to get his hands in henry's hair so much more like in the book bc he was OBSESSED#and honestly same#the soft one in the paris scene like... thats my shit. turn it up.
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Tell Me What Changed (Part 11 A)
Banner and lines by the talented @awrkive
Summary: Alex and Jungkook have been best friends since childhood âactual best friends. She is NOT in love with him, for real, and wishes people would stop assuming that. Why does no one question if heâs in love with her? Huh? But it might have to do with his successful fuckboy status, while Alex is very much⊠not that. Which is fine and doesnât matter! Until Jiminâs impending wedding leaves her eager for a date and willing to put herself out there, and Jungkook canât believe what happens next.
Fuckboy Best Friend JK x OC
CW and tags:Â fuckboy behavior, jealousy, pining, heartbreak, angst, bad language, explicit sex, sexy photos, alcohol, f2l, who knows what else I'm making it up as we go
Read on AO3 here or below cut
Previous Chapter | Masterlist | Read Epilogue
Note: I did it again, the chapter is too long for tumblr so I have to split it into three parts. Make sure you read A first!!!
Jungkook wasnât nervous for his date with Alex. Why would he be nervous? It was Alex. He knew everything Alex liked. He knew how to have a good time with her. He knew how to make her laugh until sheâd yell she was going to pee herself and go waddling to the bathroom while he shouted things after her to try and make it happen. He knew what food she liked and how long she could tolerate standing in line for an attraction and that she didnât mind the cold but she didnât like to get wet in the rain because she didnât like her hair and clothes sticking to her skin.Â
Once he had wanted to test that, run naked through the rain with her. She had of course refused and punched him in the stomach for the suggestion. He wondered if now he had a better chance of convincing her⊠for science, obviously! Did she still mind the rain if her hair was in a bun and she was totally naked in it? What if he was on top of her, blocking some of it?
But in all seriousness, he might not really date other than an occasional activity preceding a good fuck but if he was ever going to go on a date, Alex was the easiest partner for it. They could have fun âand had!-- anywhere: the grocery store, a furniture store, CVS to get their flu shots, McDonaldâs at 2am, urgent care that time his ears were stopped up so badly and his fever was so high he started to cry and she forced him to go and kept referring to him as âmy sonâ to the nurses and he couldnât stop laughing despite the pain.Â
So yeah, why would he be nervous about a date? He had no doubts about success. He was going to take her to minigolf, school her ass, then tacos from the best truck in town which he had confirmed would be at Hoff Memorial Park; theyâd eat sitting in the cold on a picnic bench and then heâd take her home to his bed before the rain started around nine and heâd, you know. Spaghetti her. Heâd put a lot of thought into what positions heâd use too. A lot. Needed to be sure heâd maximize her pleasure and not bend or twist her in a way that hurt her. Stroke her just right. He wanted to win a scream! Leave her a trembling melted mess in his arms. Ah, itâd be so good⊠sheâd be all fuck, Koo, I finally get it now, youâre really fucking good at this. Make her eat her words alongside his dick, that thing sheâd always said with a laugh, damn, if the insta-girls could see the real you theyâd be heartbroken.
He needed to show her whatâs good.
He had a plan.
And then the comments started.
Nate: âOh damn, you actually have a date with her? Wasnât that last guy really good at dates? Good luck, my man.â
Namjoon: âOh. Thatâs the date you planned? Isnât that just⊠what you guys normally do?â
Taehyung: âYeah this is the time, you can really show her that youâre serious and mature and want to do this, so like, whole nine yards, something big andâ oh. Minigolf? UmâŠâ
Sabina: âDonât take her to minigolf. She deserves more than minigolf.â
Anita: âHm, I think minigolf just seems a little easy and impersonal. But you know her best! If you think thatâs the kind of date she likes, thenâŠâ
Jimin: âYou messaged me on my honeymoon for this? Itâs fine, Alex will think itâs funny.â
Fuck. Fuck! As Jungkook paced his apartment the afternoon before the date, he realized his plan was no good. He didnât want Alex to think their date was funny. He wanted her to think it was romantic. He wanted her to be awed by his charm and suaveness⊠suavityâŠ. State of being suave. He wanted her to be swept off her feet. He wanted her to forget Hobi was ever a guy she dated and it sucked because Nate was right, Hobi was good at dates. He showed up and showed out and Alex was always all flustered and bubbly after their dates. Jungkook wanted Alex to be like that afterwards. Not just like âyep that was an ok time hanging out with my good buddy JK.â He wanted blushes and giggles and then bam, spaghetti!
This called for a fucking re-plan. And fast.Â
He showered so heâd smell fresh and lotioned and not like the mall, slapping on cologne and spot-fixing his acne in between looking things up on his laptop perched precariously on the bathroom counter. A few google searches and phone calls later and heâd completely redone their plans for the night, pulling out all the stops. Was it going to hurt his bank account? Yes. Was she worth it? Also yes.
Much more at ease about the whole thing, Jungkook took one more look at himself in the mirror, snapped a selfie, and posted it to his socials for the pep talk he needed.
[TheJK.1997]: look good feel good treat her good, ready for the surf and turf. Best wine recs for Hollyoak Vineyard go
He checked himself one last time, ran over a spot he missed shaving real quick, and was out the door in plenty of time to pick her up early, just to really surprise her. Definitely not because he was getting a stomachache from nerves and needed to do something other than pace from living room to kitchen and pick at his lips.
She wasnât ready. There he was with a fucking bouquet of flowers even though it made him feel like a fucking idiot because Hoseok gave her flowers so it would look like he was copying but obviously he couldnât not show up with flowers âthere he was with a fucking bouquet of flowers, sitting in a living room heâd been in at least one thousand times since heâd known Alex, while her dad sat in the chair and watched a Planet Earth documentary and her mom made tea in the kitchen even though he had assured her he didnât want any. They had said hello to him and not much else, both like this was any other time that heâd come over and also like it wasnât and they werenât supposed to acknowledge his presence as he just sat there on the couch in slacks and a button up with fucking flowers to give their fucking daughter who was fucking late. It was mortifying. Jungkook wished he could melt into the cracks between the couch cushions. He wished Dilong would come running out and scratch his throat or piss on him or something so he had an excuse to just leave.
âHowâs work?â Baba Song asked him over the sound of flamingos feeding.
âItâs good. Busy at the holidays.â
âHow is your dadâsâ ah, I will just ask him, Iâll see him tomorrow.â
Jungkook nodded. He wasnât actually sure what about his father was unwell right now, so he should ask. He pulled out his phone and saw they were going to have to hurry to make their dinner reservation.Â
âAHh I had better check on herââ Jungkook mumbled, starting to stand. Mama Song was just setting tea in front of him and took it upon herself to shout for Alex followed by Chinese. Alex answered in short Chinese, then came down the hall.
âIâm ready, ok? Whatâs the rush? I was doing my makeupâ oh?â She stopped in front of him and her eyes went right to the flowers. âYou brought me flowers?â
Jungkook was instantly mortified. She was probably comparing them to the ones Hoseok had bought her.
âTheyâre for your mom,â he quickly corrected, thrusting them towards Mama Song.Â
Who let out a cackle of a laugh and said, âI will put them in water for Alex. I have a perfect vase. They are beautiful.â
âWait, I want to see them,â Alex cried, leaping after her mother. She bent down to look close and Jungkook felt like she might as well be examining his limp dick, he was so embarrassed. They were supposed to be nice. Heâd bought really nice ones at the standalone shop next to the Starbucks ânot the one she worked at, not the one Hoseok worked at, a different one! He didnât know what kinds of flowers they were but there was lots of color and some spiky looking ones because they looked fun and he thought spiky flowers made sense for her.Â
âTheyâre really pretty,â she said.
âYouâre really pretty,â he countered automatically, an old way they had of teasing each other except this time heâd accidentally been nice. Baba Song coughed on the couch and Jungkook thought it had to be related. Cool, he already felt like he was dying anyway as Alex grinned wide and looked him up and down and he was sure she was laughing at him. Baba Song laughing at him too was exactly what he didnât need.
âYou look like youâre going on a date,â Alex mused.
âUhâŠâ The panic was instant. âArenât I?â
âKoopa,â she laughed and hit him on the arm. âYouâd better be! Letâs go, werenât you in a rush a minute ago? You know it takes time to do my makeup without you to help.â
âIt looks good,â he said, though the points werenât quite even which he only noticed because sometimes it took her ten tries before sheâd give up and ask him to do it. He started to offer to fix it now but she was already headed towards the door and it didnât matter.Â
âGoodbye Mr. Song. Mrs. Song,â he called. Should he promise to have her home at a certain time? Even addressing them that way felt weird but like, he was taking their daughter out on a date, he had to seem sort of respectful and responsible, right? âThank you for the tea!â He hadnât even touched it.
Alexâs skirt was very short, he noticed as they went to his car. She had fancy green tights on underneath it so he couldnât see skin or anything but it did occur to him that if she bent over, he might not even need to hike it up. Not that he was just thinking about fucking! It really felt more like a nervous impulse to think about it, because he was way more nervous about the not-fucking parts right now as he hurried around and slid into the driverâs seat. He wasnât even trying to fuck her tonight! He just wanted to hit it out of the park, this whole âdate with the goal of earning another dateâ thing.
âSo where are we going?â she asked as he started the car. It was cold and he wished he had thought to run out and start it early so she wouldnât have to sit in it; she was wearing a new coat, not her usual bulky one that made her look like a burnt marshmallow. You know, in a cute way!
âUm⊠you know that steakhouse over onââ
âSteakhouse,â she repeated, eyes going wide. âYou canât afford steak!â
âYou donât know what I canât afford. Iâm taking you to a steakhouse!â
âOk ok geez.â She wiggled in her seat to get comfortable. âI figured youâd just take me for tacos or something. Steak is fine.â
He scoffed, âCome on. Iâm a better date than that.â
âAll right James Bond or whateverâŠâ she mumbled. âDidnât know you had something you were trying to prove or whatever.â
âYeah wellâŠâ He didnât know what to say to that. Yeah, of course he had something to prove. âIs it warm enough for you?â He made it warmer, just in case, even though he was starting to sweat.Â
They lapsed into silence. The roads were icy so he didnât want to be too distracted but it made him nervous for her to just be sitting there staring out the window. Silence was bad on a date, that was something everyone knew. Silence was definitely not going to leave her starry-eyed and weak in the knees.
âSo uh, howâs work?â
âUgh, next question,â she snorted, and reached for the radio dial.
âNo, donât turn music on. Letâs just⊠talk.â
âOâŠkâŠ.â
He started talking just to fill the silence. He told her about his own work, and about Appa thinking he wanted to do Christmas lights and throwing one lit net over a bush and calling it a day, and about his new nephew who was still pretty useless but starting to look cuter now. He realized they had seen each other a few days ago so these life updates werenât necessary but he wanted some sort of connection.
âUh⊠well, thereâs not much going on with me⊠well, Hobi brought a box of my stuff to work today, so that kind of suckedââ
âHe brought it to your work?!â
âWell he waited in the parking lot but yeah⊠I mean we agreed to do that today but still that sucked in the morning and then I got home and Dilong puked on my bed and I stubbed my toe while I was getting ready⊠but you brought me flowers, so thatâs the best part of my day so far,â she smiled.Â
âThey were for your momâŠâ
âOh yeah? For Mrs. Song?â she teased.Â
But he didnât feel like being teased because this was a date and they were supposed to be getting to know each other and charming each other, so instead he suggested, âOk letâs not talk about Hobi or uh, other exes or anything tonight.â
âUm⊠ok⊠Geez, sensitive much?â
âItâs my date with you.â
âYou just asked me how my day was and I told you.â
âOk so now I know and Iâm just saying we can talk about other things now.â
âOk like what?â
âUmâŠâ Jungkook wracked his brain, but everything that came to mind wasnât the kind of thing he wanted to talk about on their first date. Funny but inappropriate memes, friend gossip, political outrage, bemoaning the economy, a really bloody anime heâd started and thought she might like too, none of it was the way he wanted to represent himself right now as a respectable and respectful guy. Boyfriend material.
âWeâre here,â he announced. Saved by the drive time. He pulled into a spot near the waterâs edge âjust a pond, but definitely something the steakhouse capitalized on for atmosphere. Fairy lights hung above the walkway through a little windy garden to reach the front of the restaurant.
âWoah, this place is nice,â Alex murmured, bumping into him as she looked around. âAre you sure about this? Itâs really fancy⊠I didnât dress for something this fancyâŠâ
âIâm sure.â He took her hand and looped it through his arm. âYou deserve something like this. Itâs our first date. Right?â He looked eagerly down at her, needing to hear her agree that it was in fact their first date and that was in fact a big deal to her too.
âI guess but you really didnât have to go to so much trouble. You know me, Iâm easyââ
âI donât know you. This is our chance to get to know each other,â he corrected. âAs âyou know, this new way of seeing each other.â As romantic partners, he couldnât bring himself to say.
He thought her smile looked unconvinced but at least she was smiling. They reached the front door âand now he saw a side ramp they could have taken right to the front door instead of wandering through the garden. Uh well. He opened the door for her and they walked in to easily the nicest restaurant Jungkook had ever been to in his life. The host was wearing a tux.Â
Shit this place was going to be expensive.
âGood evening,â the host greeted them as Jungkook shirked his coat off.
âHi. Um, Jungkook Jeon, table for two. I have reservations for 6:00.âÂ
âAh, yes, Jeon, hmâŠâ The host didnât move as his gaze trailed down Jungkook and then slid to Alex. âMy apologies, Mr. Jeon, but were you aware that there is a dress code for dining here?â
Jungkook glanced down at his slacks and dark blue button up and nodded, âYeah. We dressed nicely.â He glanced at Alex and realized he hadnât told her to dress nicely but yeah, she looked great: short red skirt, dark green legs, a fluffy white sweater with⊠pearls? Had she really worn a sweater with pearls all across the chest to their dateâ ok, but she hadnât meant anything filthy by it, he was sure of that. Just because his mind went there didnât mean hers did.
âIâm sorry, the dress code is formal. That means at least a tie and jacket for the gentleman and formal evening dress or pantsuit for the lady.âÂ
âUhâŠâ Jungkook glanced at their outfits again. âWell this is what we have on soâŠâ
The host looked performatively apologetic as he said, âIâm sorry, I cannot seat you.â
âBut⊠but I made a reservation,â Jungkook argued. âNo oneâs going to die because Iâm not wearing a jacket.â
âNeither of you is dressed appropriately for the restaurant, Iâm afraidââ
It was embarrassing, sure, but he also didnât want Alex to hear someone insinuate she wasnât dressed nicely, so he ignored that she was grabbing his arm and argued, âOk but she looks like a million bucks so I donâtâ you just need me to put on a jacket and a tieââ
âJungkook, letâs just go,â she said, trying to push him back towards the door.
âBut I made reservations. This isnât the â50s. No one under 50 has a jacket and tie for dinner at a shitty suburban steakhouse on the swampââ
âKoo, letâs go,â she grunted, and managed to push him back against the door. He pushed it and stepped back out into the cold and felt the anger flare up freely now.
âWhat the fuck kind of placeâ am I crazy? Who fucking cares whether I have a jacket and a tie on forââ
âWell they care, itâs their rule!â
âItâs discrimination against young people!â
âYeah, did you see the people eating in the restaurant?â she laughed. âI donât think they want young people eating there. They want like rich uppercrust people.â
âThose people donât live here.â
âWell this place is kind of famous, isnât it? Maybe they drive inâŠâ
âIs it?â
âI think it was on a TV show,â Alex admitted, before pointing to a plaque beside the door. Apparently it had, and won a bunch of awards. No wonder they cared about the way they looked or whatever.
âYeah well showing all that by the door is tacky,â Jungkook scowled. Waves of anger and embarrassment rolled over him. âMy money is as good as the next guyâs.â
âOk but who cares, we donât have to eat at a place like this. Letâs just pick somewhere else,â Alex said, nudging him towards the ramp.
Ugh, Hoseok would definitely have worn the suit and tie.
âMaybe we can just run back to my place and I can grab the suit I wore to the weddingââ
âNo, Iâm not dressed like that either and I donât want to change. I spent way longer than I want to admit figuring out what to wear that would be cute and comfy,â she protested.
âBut I want to take you to this nice placeââ
âI donât care about the nice place!â she snapped. He really did think she snapped at him, and it shut him up. They marched in silence down the ramp back towards his car. They got into the car. They buckled their seatbelts.
Bad start to the date.
âWe can go to Taco Bell for all I care,â Alex suggested.
âThatâs a shitty date,â Jungkook sulked. âThatâs the kind of date you think I am?â
âThereïżœïżœs nothing wrong with Taco BellâŠâ
âIâm not taking you to fucking Taco Bell,â he groaned and pulled out his phone and began scrolling again. What was close, and nice, and not a fucking Taco Bell, and not going to turn them away at the door because they werenât dressed in some shitty elitist outdated formal dining attire. Fuck, he was so angry about it! Even if that was a rule, they couldnât bend it? They couldnât seat them somewhere private or something? He was trying to impress a girl here!
âWe could do Italian⊠is that too much wine though? Weâre going to a wine tasting afterwards.â
âA wine tasting?â Alex repeated. âUmâŠâ
âYou donât like a wine tasting?â
âNo no itâs fine!â Alex assured him. âThatâs cute. You really⊠yeah, itâll be great,â she smiled at him. âAnd sure, Italian is fine! Letâs do Italian. What place are you thinking?â
âTomasso Trattoria and Enoteca,â Jungkook read, and handed her the phone as he started to drive so she could look at it.
âWoah⊠this place is still really nice though⊠I was thinking like Olive Gardenââ
âAlex, can you please let me take this date seriously? I realize maybe you donât care butââ
âI care! Care about this being our date? I care!â
âI want it to be a special date!â
âI get it! This place looks very special,â she told him, setting his phone in the cradle with the GPS up.Â
He knew his frustration was a wall between them but she didnât break it down this time. Usually she was good at that. He didnât know what it meant, that she didnât try. He wasnât sure how to do it on his own, because if this was a date with someone else he wouldnât care, heâd just change the subject and move on and vent about it to Alex later, or invent an excuse to take the girl home and go home. To Alex. Obviously she knew how he was, inside and out, but as he drove in the silence he started to feel a deeper embarrassment, like sheâd seen him do something wrong. It wasnât wrong for him to be annoyed with the restaurant for not letting them in! They had told him formal dress when he made the reservation sure but they didnât explain that meant anything other than just looking your best! He looked his best! Alex looked her best! What, were they going to wear their wedding clothes or something?
âYou know I was thinking about how crazy it is that just everything is Christmas this time of year,â Alex mused. âItâs not like I didnât know everything is too Christmas and that there are lots of people who doesnât celebrate who have to deal with it but I guess because we celebrate without being Christian, I didnât really think about how fucking annoying it is for people who really donât celebrate. Rebekah was telling me people always act like theyâre sorry for herâŠâ She continued to talk about it and he took the moment to breathe deeply. Ok. Change in plans. But Alex wasnât demanding he take her home, so it would be ok. Even if he didnât know why the fuck this was what she decided to ramble about, at least it was something.
The Italian place was busier, smaller, not on the water, but still nice and they didnât get turned away at the door. The host took their coats for them. The tables had real candles, which Jungkook didnât realize he cared about until they sat down and he saw the actual flicker from the breeze of their motions. The menus were short, which a Reddit thread had taught him meant it was a sign of a good restaurant. Their waiter had a bowtie and a black vest and offered to call over a sommelier to guide their wine selection.
âWeâre going to a wine tasting after this,â Alex informed the waiter. âSo Iâll wait on the wine.â
âWe can have a glass or something here,â Jungkook argued.
Alex shook her head and tapped the wine menu, maybe trying to show him that the cheapest wine was $15/glass at a glance. But he had brought her to an Italian restaurant! For a fancy dinner! Wine was part of a fancy dinner!
âYou donât have to, but Iâll have a glass of something, send the sommelier over,â Jungkook insisted.Â
Alex decided sheâd have the glass too. They had to show their cards and mused as they always did about how old they would have to be before the stopped getting carded. The waiter brought them bread and promised their calamari appetizer would be out quickly.
âWow, itâs so romantic here,â Alex murmured. Jungkook felt the sigh of relief radiate from his chest. The candle light danced across her skin as she studied the elaborate murals on the walls, partially obscured by heavy red curtains. Elegant music played over the low din of dining. They were towards the edge of a large room, tucked into a little booth by the window with a view of nothing but trees. A grand piano stood in the center of what looked like a dance floor, tables sparse on the wooden floor.
âI feel bad,â she continued. âI didnât realize you wanted to do such fancy things, I would have dressed nicer.â
âI think you dressed nice.â
âI did too until I saw you,â she laughed. âI guess I forgotâŠâ
âForgot what?â he asked, not following.
âWhat you look like.â
âWhaaaat?â he grinned, warmed by the flattery. The compliments from her felt sincere in a way they hadnât before. He was used to teasing, so he almost didnât trust it, but she didnât look like she was teasing him. Now he found himself hungry for more. Did she really think he was hot? Not just aware that other people thought so, but she thought so? She liked the way he looked? She liked the way he dressed?
âOh my god,â she snickered and rolled her eyes. âDo you always take your ego on dates with you?â
âNo, I left it at home tonight with my jacket and tie,â he joked. She smiled and looked so pretty in the candlelight. He draped his hand across the table, palm down, to see if sheâd take the hint and put hers on it. Would they be the kind of couple that held hands at dinner? Obviously not on a first date, but someday would they sit on the same side of the booth? Well, in a more serious way than when they did that at Wendyâs so they could both put their feet up on the other bench, that was different.
âThe mood lighting is so⊠romantic,â she said again. âI feel like I should have worn high heels.â
âYour boots have heels.â
âYeah but you know what I meanâŠâ
âDo you want to dance until our food gets here?â The question was impulsive. No one else was dancing. But that could mean she wouldnât have to feel nervous or pressured about dancing on beat with him. They could just hold onto each other and sway, here by the table or over on the dance floor. Maybe other people could join. He had enjoyed dancing with her so much, it would be a nice thing to add tonight.
But her eyes went wide as she cried, âHey, donât make fun of me!â
âWhatââ
âOh god, donât joke about it,â she laughed and covered her face. âHow fucking humiliatingâŠâ
Jungkook hadnât meant it as a joke. He thought it would be romantic. He certainly hadnât meant to embarrass her just by the suggestion of dancing together. Unsure what else to say, he racked his brain trying to think of topics. The problem was that the lists of things to talk about on your first date were things like ask about where they grew up and ask about their hobbies and ask them what makes them unique? And ask them where their favorite place in the world is. But Jungkook knew all of these things about her! He wanted to learn something new about her. He wanted to seem new to her.
âUh⊠whatâs your favorite place in the world?â he asked as she untangled the little legs of their calamari appetizer.
âMine? I donât know⊠my parentsâ house? I guess it was our old apartment.â
âOh. Really?â he frowned.
âWhy are you frowning?!â
âThatâs just kind of sad.â
âOk. Ouch.â
âNo! I mean because we donât live there anymore.â
âOh. Yeah. How annoying,â she sighed. âSo whatâs Namjoon like as a roommate?â
âHeâs a good roommate,â Jungkook said because he didnât want to gossip or vent or seem complainy. Namjoon was a good roommate! Sure, he had a household aesthetic and a lot of Jungkookâs stuff didnât meet the mark so he was kind of crowded into his room.Â
âThatâs it? Thatâs all you have to say? Come on, you complained about living with me all the time.â
âAh, yeah, sorry about thatâŠâ
âHuh?â
Embarrassed that sheâd bring that up, he sipped his $15/glass wine. Yeah, he was worried about that. Alex was his best friend and heâd always treated her like a best friend but that wasnât the same way you wanted to treat a girlfriend. He had a lot of things to undo. Actually, that was it, their first date wasnât about learning, it was about unlearning all the things he would never have let a girl see about him.Â
âYouâre being so weird,â she laughed, and nudged his foot under the table. âIs something wrong?â
âHm? No, why would something be wrong?â
âDonât let that other place bother you. I like this place a lot better anyway, this calamari is really good! I hope you still like me when Iâm bloated from too much fettuccineâŠâ
Instantly he assured her, âOf course I do. I mean, not that youâll be bloaty orâ I mean, obviously the body naturally looks different after a big dinner but itâs notâ I wonât notice that kind ofâ itâs just normalâŠâ
âIt was a joke,â she said. âIâm wearing a bulky sweater, you wonât be able to tell anyway. Unless you get me naked.â She arched her eyebrow.Â
âWe, umâ tonight itâs um⊠were you thinking that? I thought weâd just have a nice dateââ
âOh. Thatâs not⊠nice? OK, I mean Iâm half joking, I didnât realize you had such a tight schedule for tonight!â
Jungkook had never felt so awkward and weird around Alex in his life. The only thing he knew to do was try and get the conversation back on track to Impressive Date Approved topics:
âHey, so I was watching a really interesting show the other day. It was about the brain and all the changes it goes through from like a baby to a dead personâ an old person.â
âThe brain does very much still change after you die,â she pointed out. Yeah, dead people and rotting brains was definitely not on the approved list. No girl went home from a date and was like oh boy he was so handsome and charming and funny and we talked about decaying brains. Iâm so in love.
She had not said that to him yet. That she loved him. There hadnât been any real confession or labeling and he was obviously fine with that, he didnât need labels, but still, it would be cool to get her to say something he could be sure of.
âNo, donât be like that, it was really cool to seeâ oh thank Christ the food is here.â
âYou in a hurry or something?â she laughed. Which reminded him that they did have a scheduled start time for the wine tasting. He checked his phone as the waiter set their food down.Â
âOur wine tasting is at 7:30.â
âWhat?! Then yeah we donât have much time!â
âYeah.â Hm, he hadnât really done the math rightâ or well he had when heâd made reservations for six at the other place, he just hadnât counted on needing to change restaurants. Actually they have very little time. âUh, well, ok, letâs eat fast thenâŠâ Eating fast was not romantic. âOr we can miss it. Itâs fine.â
But she waved her hand, already twirling pasta around her fork, âNo way, weâll make it. You worked so hard planning all of this! I can eat fast. Damn this is good pastaâŠ. You want to try this?â
He did, but he already envisioned the noodles swinging down and getting on his dark shirt. And then sheâd want to try his, which was spaghetti and meatballs (it was one of the cheapest things on the menu, ok?!) and heâd drop one and it would bounce onto her white sweater. It wasnât worth the risk.
âNah, we can just eat our own food,â he assured her.Â
And promptly knocked his glass of wine to the ground, shattering it.
**
Alex had never seen Jungkook acting so weird in her life. He swung back and forth between distracted and too intense. One moment sheâd think he was bored and the next heâd ignore whatever she just said and start telling her a play by play of some brain documentary he watched! He was clearly pissed about the first restaurant turning them away but then didnât seem to care about the next place even though it was really nice; they had to leave so quickly to get to the wine tasting that they didnât even get dessert.Â
He wasnât acting like himself at all. Honestly, she felt like another day he might have still been able to sweet talk them into that first restaurant âthough she was glad he hadnât because she wasnât really comfortable in a place like that anyway. It was bad enough being at the Italian restaurant where Jungkook insisted on paying and the waiter gave her a menu without prices so she didnât even know how much damage she was doing to Jungkookâs bank account. He didnât want to talk about any of the things they normally talked about. He didnât respond to any of her jokes.Â
She couldnât figure it out. Did he just not want to be here? But that didnât make sense, because if he didnât want to be here, he wouldnât be! Jungkook had no problem peacing out of a situation he didnât want to be in. Heâd bailed on her plenty of times, that wasnât hard for him.
They rushed across town to get to Hollyoak Vineyards for this wine tasting Jungkook had booked them for âand she was confused, because they couldnât do a vineyard tour in the cold and dark or anythingâ and made it just in the nick of time. He kept saying over and over that it was fine if they missed it, which seemed to mean it wasnât fine.Â
And then, checking in, winded by the sprint from the car, Alex made a terrible discovery: she had left her wallet and ID at the Italian restaurant. Which might have been fine if Jungkook wasnât with her, because often she didnât get carded on her own. But Jungkook made her look younger with that charming babyface of his. The woman asked to see their IDs before they could join the tour and tasting.
âI left it at the restaurant,â she admitted quietly, turning to Jungkook.
For a moment he just looked at her.
âYou donât have your ID?â
âItâs at the restaurant.â
âUhâŠâ
He froze. He looked between her and the employee and Alex knew that look: somebody fix this for me because I donât know what to do now. Usually she didnât see that look unless he was drunk or in emotional crisis. Neither was true now, except that he still wasnât saying anything.
âIs there another tasting tonight?â Alex asked the employee.
âNo, Iâm sorry. I can reschedule you for another day?â
âCould he start the tasting now and Iâll go and come backââ
âNo, youâll miss the whole thing,â Jungkook said, reanimated. He pulled his ID off the counter and tucked it back into his wallet. âOk, weâll go. Thanks anyway.â
âIâm sorry, I guess it fell out of my purse under the table,â she explained as they left the place. He didnât say anything. She couldnât tell if he was pissed or disappointed, but she felt bad either way. âIâm really sorry, Jungkook.â
âItâs fine. It doesnât matter,â he sighed. âUhâŠâ They reached the car and he closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. She didnât know what he was thinking about or if he was just trying to control his emotions or what. âYou want me just to take you home? This is all kind of a bust, huh?â
âWha? No, donât take me home yet!â
âYou sure? âCause this a pretty fail date soââ
âOh my god are you serious right now?â she laughed. âItâs fine! Things go wrong sometimes, itâs not that serious. Canât we just find something else to do?â
He let out a deep, heavy sigh.
âHey look, Iâm sorry I fucked up the wine tasting. We can just do that on another date, Iâll book it.â
âYeah butâŠâ
âLetâs just go to minigolf or somethingââ
âIâm not taking you to minigolf,â he huffed, and crossed his arms and leaned against the car, and rolled his eyes.
And frankly, Alex had had enough.
âWhy the fuck not? Whatâs wrong with minigolf? Whatâs wrong with Taco Bell? I donât want to be a bitch because I know you put all this effort into planning all of these things but why are you acting like weâre suddenly too good toâ ok, we tried this fancy stuff and things went wrong so letâs just do something else! It doesnât have to be a big deal!â
âIt does have to be a big deal, Alex! Itâs our first fucking date!â
âSo?!â she shouted, throwing her arms up.
âWhat do you mean âsoâ?! Itâs our first date! The first date we ever go on!â he shouted back.
âYeah I know that! But it doesnât have to be like some bigâŠâ She couldnât think of the right words. Her shouting fizzled a bit as she thought through what heâd just said, and how actually very sweet that was.
âI wanted it to be big,â he insisted. âHoseok always took you on these big fancy dates, right? Yeah, I can do that too!â
âOh, Jungkook,â she sighed. And walked around and grabbed his coat and headbutted his chest and let her head rest there. âYou dummy.â
âWhat?â
âDonât worry about what Hoseok did. Who cares?â
âYou cared.â
âPast tense,â she pointed out, craning her neck to look up at him from so close. âNow Iâm out on a date with you. I donât have this like high expectation ofââ
âOf a good date? You should. Thatâs shitty, I donâtââ
âWe can do anything and itâs a good date. I just wanted to spend time with you. We already know all kinds of things we like doing together.â
âYeah but this isnât just hanging out, Alex. Itâs a date date. I wanted it to be special.â
âIt is special, you idiot.â She hit him on the arm several times to try and make him smile. âItâs us. Obviously itâs special.â
âNo, weâve always been just friends. This needs to be big so you know itâs differentââ
âDo you think Iâm a stupid little baby? Is that why you were telling me about baby brains? I know this is different! You brought me flowers and looked all nervous and awkward on my couch!â It was more fun to tease him than admit her own nerves as sheâd dressed and redressed and then redressed again. But the excitement for her had been a thousand times louder than the nerves. Nervous-excited, not nervous-afraid.
He sounded nervous-afraid.
âYeah butââ
âI put on sexy underwear and eyeliner! The pointy way you said looks good!â
âI know thatâ I mean not about the underwear butââ
âSo why are you being so weird about our date? Thereâs no point if you donât actually enjoy spending time with me.â
âWhat are you talking about?â he demanded, eyebrows furrowing into the little V she had predicted. âOf course I like spending time with you.â
âYeah? What do you like doing with me?â
âI donât know, just⊠stuff. Like⊠but itâs just been friend stuff beforeââ
âIâm no expert, but I think dating is kind of just doing the same things we always did except we say itâs a date now,â she pointed out. âYou donât think so? Or are you worried you donât actually like me or something?â
âI like you, Alex, thatâs why Iâm nervous. Pretty sure I used a word stronger than âlikeâ before too.â
She let that sit for a moment. Hearing Jungkook admit he was nervous was a completely different lens to look at the whole evening. Hearing Jungkook reiterate that he liked her was like, nauseatingly unbelievable.Â
Ok, now she was having a harder time not being nervous-afraid because yeah, this was pretty crazy, being on a date date with Jungkook that he was taking so seriously because he liked her and she liked him too. Oh god.
âAre you⊠are you just cranky because youâre worried about having a bad first date?â she fumbled out.
âYeah! Obviously! Jesus, itâs like youâ are you fucking with me right now?!â
âOh my god, you are so high strung right now,â she sighed and pulled on his jacket. âJungkook! Chill! Are you serious?â
âI justâŠâ
âBaby,â she said, and reached up to grab his face in a burst of confidence fueled by all of his nonsense. âBaby Koo.â
âShut up,â he grumbled.
âNo, donât be grumpy. Look at me.â He begrudgingly did so; he didnât have much of a choice with her holding his head. âThank you for a wonderful dinner and for scheduling the wine tasting I fucked up. This whole evening is really special to me. The fact you worked so hard to make it special makes me feel really special. I donât want to say goodnight yet, so Iâd really like ice cream and minigolf with you.â
âWhy are you so obsessed with minigolf?â he mumbled.
âI donât know, I just think itâs a cute date idea and I like doing dumb things like that with you,â she shrugged, letting her hands fall away. He caught hold of them though and held. His fingers were cold. âIâm still allowed to like it, even when itâs a date date.â
âYeah, wellâŠâ His mouth twisted in thought, so cute. âMy original plan was to do minigolf,â he confessed. âAnd the taco truck. But then everyone acted like that was really lame and low effort so I wanted to do something bigger so you would knowââ
âFuck that!â Alex cried. âAnd fuck them! I like minigolf and tacos!â
âI know you like that but I wanted to like⊠I want you to be all giddy and stuff, you know? No one gets giddy over minigolf.â
âThey do when they win,â she beamed. âYou wouldnât know about that. Since you never win.âÂ
His eyes narrowed. âUh, pretty sure I always beat your ass. I canât let you win, just because itâs a date.â
âWho said anything about let?â
âUgggh but see? I canât beat your ass, thatâll be a bad date.â
âThen let me win.â
âYouâd hate me forever.â
âI wouldnât hate you! Iâd just be shocked you were down that bad for meâ I donât think your ego could let someoneââ
âHey, I let girls win that shit all the time,â he interrupted. âI donât let you win because I respect you so much.â
âYeah or because you arenât trying to get into my pants.â
âNo, but I do want into your pants now.â
âWell⊠sounds like you know what to do thenâŠâ She grinned and wiggled her eyebrows and felt full body relief. Everything made so much more sense now. She should have figured it out sooner that Jungkook was just nervous and frustrated that things werenât going to his plan when he was trying so hard! But how could she have guessed he was this worked up about impressing her? It was just her!
âAlex,â he whined her name. She started to walk around the car but he was still holding her wrist and pulled her back. âWe canât play minigolf. Forty years from now weâll be talking about our first date and Iâm going to say I took you to play fucking minigolf?â
Damn. Damn that sounded serious.Â
âUm, well,â she stammered, distracted at the casual way in which heâd basically just been like yeah weâre going to be together forever. âWell first youâll probably tease me about forgetting my wallet and then youâll probably tease me about being easy or childish because I wanted to play minigolf.â
âAh, thatâs true⊠you asked for it. Iâm just giving you what you wanted.â His voice lowered as he said it, as he pulled her closer, no secret about the innuendo.
âGiving me what I want is always the right move,â she agreed, and lifted her face so he wouldnât have to crouch too far for the kiss she thought he was leading into. There was only a moment of hesitation during which she worried sheâd read him wrong. Maybe this just wasnât normal yet, but they wanted it. He smiled into the kiss, giving too much teeth against hers, but she tilted her face and the kiss softened and Alex forgot to breathe. You know, just Jungkook, kissing her in the parking lot, nose pressed against hers, warm breath and saliva mingling with hers.
She overbalanced on her toes and they fell back against his car but he caught his own weight and towered over her.Â
âMaybe you should go back to being pissy and mean,â she breathed.
âHuh?â
âYouâre making me dizzy,â she admitted with a laugh. âI know we kissed the other night butââÂ
Jungkook cut her off with another kiss that made her toes curl and her heart stutter.
âYeah?â he murmured, sounding a bit breathless himself as his nose gently nudged hers. âAm I giving you butterflies kissing you in the parking lot of the wine tasting we didnât get to do?â
âYeah.â
He sighed, wine-scented breath warm across her face. âCan you please be a little more high maintenance? Iâm giving you permission to be demanding!â
âOh, I will be, without your permission,â she assured him with a cheeky grin. âYou seem to be forgettingâ well, I wonât remind you. You just keep those rose-tinted glasses on for a while. At least until I make you cry at minigolf.â
âOk, are you just forgetting that youâre really bad at minigolf? Because I have not forgotten itââ
âThatâs not true! Iâve won before!â
âYeah, by sabotaging me,â he pointed out.
âMm-hm and now I can sabotage you even more, right? Like⊠oops I dropped my ball!â she joked and slid from his arms to bend over and pick it up. So he had a nice profile of just how high her skirt would go. She was wearing tights, it wasnât going to show anything but look, sheâd learned a few things over the years about what Jungkook liked. He liked the tease. The suggestion. Maybe he liked it more than the real thing.Â
She hoped he didnât like the idea of her more than the real thing.
Also he really liked ass, so at least that was a safe bet.
He grumbled and demanded, âHow many dates do we have to go on before Iâm allowed to spank when you do something like that?â
Oh god be cool she begged herself because, you know, Jungkook had basically just asked to spank her. Jungkook. Spanking her. Just⊠spanking her. Cool. Cool cool.
âUm⊠three.â
He looked unhappy about it but nodded, âOk. So youâre just going to tease me a lot tonight then?â
âYeah, probably. But if you cry when you lose, Iâll comfort you. Iâm not totally mean.â
âYeah, Iâll give you a hug when you lose,â he promised. âIâm a caring date.â
âYouâre a nice guy.â
âYeah, Iâm a nice guy,â he laughed, then tried to tickle and poke her through her coat. âI am. Sorry if I was weird or whatever tonight.â
âHey, why are you talking like the night is over? You are still on a date,â she argued.Â
âRight right, I have to make your dreams come true. Minigolf and ice cream.â
âAnd you,â she added, sort of without meaning to. At least the vulnerability of it hit her after sheâd said the words. She just had meant to specify he was an important part of why she would like those things on a date!
But the thing was, she didnât really feel vulnerable tonight in a bad way. She didnât feel as nervous or impostery as she had feared. This was Jungkook! She didnât think there was anyone in the world she was safer with and all his efforts and overthinking seemed to prove that. Heâd taken on all the nerves for her. What a great guy.
He smiled, that goofy crooked toothy grin of her best friend, and said, âWell call me a dreamboy, baby, because Iâm about to make all your dreams come trueââ
âOk you did not get laid with lines like that,â Alex said with a roll of her eyes.
âYeah, sure I did!â
âNo.â
âI did! Are you saying that did not make you cream your panties? What kind of panties did you say againââ
âOh my god, just get in the car.â
âFine, what date can I ask about your panties? Because I thought that one was ok since we talked about it the other night.â
âMy panties?â
âYeah.â
âYou mean because youâve been hoarding my underwear at yourââ
âWoah woah I did notâ I told you they were just mixed in withââ
âThey?! How many of my underwear do you have?!â
âGet in the car, Song.â
She giggled and continued to taunt him as the car heated up and he looked up places. There was an indoor one at the mall they were familiar with but Alex wanted the outside one which was still open through the end of the month and served ice cream.
âYou sure youâre ok with outside?â
âIâll be fine! I have a coat and sweater tights.â
âOh is that why they look fancy?â
âYeah, theyâre textured. Want to feel them?â she teased as he drove. But he took the advantage, letting his hand slide across her thigh. She got very quiet. His hand just looked so familiar and comfortable there, like that was his thigh.Â
âYeah, I like these,â he nodded. âYour whole outfit.â
She waited, then sighed, âYou noticed I couldnât get my eyeliner straight, didnât you?â
âWell, thatâs why you have me now,â he laughed. âI can help next time.â
âLook you werenât the only one nervous, ok?â
âYeah? What were you nervous about, baby?â he asked, still rubbing her thigh. He might as well have been rubbing somewhere else with that firm grip. The devil part of her wanted to just ask him to let his hand run higher, maybe a sequel to the other nightâŠ
âYeah donât act all cocky now. I know your secret!â she retorted and adjusted her skirt.
âWhatâs my secret?â
âYou like me.â
âYouâre right, that is a very well kept secret,â he laughed. âPlease donât spread that around. There might still be a couple people in town I didnât drunkenly blab that to in the last few months.â
She sighed happily at his expense. Maybe the craziest thing wasnât being on a date with ex-best-turned-best-friend-again Jungkook. Maybe the craziest thing was that being on an actual date with him didnât feel as crazy as sheâd always expected it to. Would that come later? She hadnât felt mismatched on his arm walking into either restaurant like sheâd expected to. Yes, he was the hottest guy in any room. And he wanted to put his face between her legs, so what did that make her?
Ok, that part was still a little wild and crazy. Not only that heâd wanted to but sheâd let him. Maybe sheâd even let him do it for real next time.
âYou ok?â
âHm?â
âIs it too hot in here now?â he asked.
âYeah, way too hot,â she agreed, reaching forward to crank the heat down. Jungkook cracked the windows. She drank the cool air in and pushed back against the warm tingling starting to build up.Â
âSo what did your parents say when you told them I was picking you up for a date tonight?â he asked, throat clearing. It made her suspicious in two directions.
âWhy, what did they say to you?â she asked, the safer question than: why you clearing your throat, boo? Whatcha thinking about?Â
âNothing, they were just acting kind of weirdâŠâ
âI told them we were going on a date date and they were just like âoh really? Thatâs nice.â I donât think they believed me!â
âWell I was dressed up with flowers.â
âPlus you were acting super weird too,â Alex pointed out.
âThanks, babe.â
His hand left her thigh as he took a sharp turn and Alex wished heâd read her mind and put it back, but he did not.
âLetâs get your wallet, dummy.â
Fifteen minutes and one returned wallet later, he pulled into the minigolf parking lot and pressed, âYou sure you want to do this?â
âWhy? You scared?â
âNo, I meant because itâs coldââ
âYouâre scared.â
âIâm not scared, Alex. You golf like a toddler.â
âItâs minigolf, thatâs the point!â
âThatâs not the⊠whatever, ice cream before or after?â
âDuring. Iâm ready to doublefist a cone and a club.â
It really was fucking cold outside, but the course was lit and they werenât the only ones. The snack bar served them the ice cream, the employee giving them a raised eyebrow but handing the cones over. Jungkook hit his first ball straight into a pond and Alex got a scathing look from a mom when she shouted what are you the fucking hulk? Itâs minigolf! While he shouted accusations at her That was your fault! Why are you bending over like that to tie your shoe? Your boots donât even have laces!Â
The truth was they were both pretty bad at minigolf tonight. Their teeth chattered and they huddled together from one hole to the next. They fucked with each other every single turn âdirty jokes, terrible impersonations, quoting memes and movies they knew would get a rise out of each other. Jungkook tried the same move sheâd done in the beginning, even pulling his coat up to make sure she could see his ass, sulked when it didnât work, and pretended like he was going to do a full on striptease âwhich would definitely have led to Alexâs premature death. Later she offered to suck his fingers to warm them up and he fell to the ground claiming heâd sprained his dick.Â
And then it started to rain.
âAre you fucking kidding me?!â Jungkook shouted as Alex grabbed his hand and ran with him into the mountain tunnel in the center of the course. âIt wasnât supposed to rain until 9!â
âThe weather does what it wants.â
âYeah but itâs fucking with my date. You donât like getting rained on! Unless today is the day we try the naked thingââ
She laughed and pulled him down closer to kiss his wet face. His skin was so cold. Their lips and noses were stiff. The sweetness of his mint choco ice cream lingered on his tongue. Alex stood on the railing for height and lost herself in the taste. She thought sheâd be taking this dumb fantasy to her grave and yet here they were, making out in the minigolf mountain like the horny teenages they hadnât gotten to be with each other.Â
After several long, lazy, uncounted minutes had passed, they huddled together at the exit to survey the remaining distance. The rain was not letting up.
âDid you make it rain?â he demanded. âYouâre that upset Iâm beating you?â
âUh⊠you arenât beating me.â
âAlex, Iâm totally beating you.â
âYou totally arenât.â
âThen whatâs the score?â
âI donât know but you donât know either!â
â7-11.â
âYou liar!â she laughed and tried to hit his ass. âFine, weâll count for real now.â
âWait, what for real now? Itâs raining!â
âItâs not raining that hard.â
âItâs hard enough!â he cried, then instantly laughed and wiggled his eyebrows, then groaned, âBut Iâm not, Iâm freezing!â
âAll right, letâs golf fast! Orrrr you could admit defeat.â
âNever,â he glared and grabbed his putter and took off.
The cheating was flagrant and largely futile. Putters were traded for kicking, rolling, and eventually just dropping the ball in the hole. They shouted numbers to make each other lose count. They were laughing so hard, doubled over at times as the rain grew heavier and colder. She really did hate the way her clothes and hair clung to her wet skin, but it was worth it to endure. This was a special night.
âWeâre idiots!â Alex laughed, then shrieked as she slipped on a little bridge. Jungkook dove forward and rammed his elbow on the metal railing, didnât help her, and sank to the ground like heâd been knocked out. âGet up! Get up! Youâll get hypothermia!â
Instead he took her putter and shouted, âGood luck winning now!â and limped forward, clutching his elbow. Alex ran ahead of him and managed to shove her ball into the final return hole just as he tried to kick his in. Instead he kicked her in the shoulder and shouted in horror. She tried to stand, he tried to crouch.
âFuck!â
âUp up we have to get back to the car, weâre going to freeze to death!â Jungkook shouted at her, grabbing her arm. They half-limped, half-ran back to the parking lot, tossing their putters in the return rack without stopping.
âWeâre such idiots, weâre going to get sick and die,â Alex wailed as they stripped their wet coats off and shoved them in the backseat. Jungkook cranked the heat up. âFuck, I hate my bangs!â she laughed, swiping at the hair plastered to her face, poking her in the eyes. âAt least I wore my contacts.â
Jungkookâs hands replaced hers, pushing them back, followed by his cold lips against her forehead, her nose and then her mouth, all one smooth motion that completely overwhelmed her. Her fingers tightened on his shoulders in surprise as he grabbed her arms and pulled her closer, like the laughter and running and cheating had turned into raw energy that he now funneled into a hard, desperate kiss. The joy in that kiss made the world spin around her. The windows were fogging up and she felt that desperation again. Touch me, taste me, take me, do anything to me, let me be the girl you want.
âAlex.â
âKoo.â
His breath warmed her frozen nose and stung her frozen cheeks.Â
âWas this the worst date ever?â
She glared. âNo! It was good because it was with me, right?â
âWeâre both going to get the flu.â
âStop complaining and just kiss me again,â she ordered, pulling him across the console this time. He pressed her into the seat, contorted, mouth getting hotter against hers by the second.Â
âGod I canât believe this was the best date of my life,â he completely contradicted himself.
The giggles burst out of her, âDamn. Really? Thatâs sadââ
He shoved icy fingers under her sweater to tickle and she screamed and kicked the dashboard in her attempts to flee. He just wrapped his arms around her and pressed his frozen nose into her neck, squeezing tighter.
âYou asshole, let me go!â
âNever.â
âJungkook!â
âYou said you wanted outdoor minigolf, you suffer the consequences! Iâm warming my nose up.â
âIâm so uncomfortably wet!â
âYeah babyââ
âNo, in a bad way!â
âLove leaving a girl wet in a bad way on our first dateââ She couldnât hear what else he said, drowned out by her laughter. Someone was going to think they were fucking in here with the way windows had fogged up so quickly and they were shaking the car. She pushed him away and adjusted the heat and wiped at the condensation on her window. Now it was uncomfortably hot, and also her clothing really felt disgusting like this. The fluffy sweater was scratchy and gross. She pulled it away from her skin but it just clung right back.
Jungkook shook his head.
âWhat?â
âI tried so hard to make this date nice,â he laughed.
âOh my god youâre so hung up on this. Iâm having a great time!â
But perfectionist Jungkook. She should have known heâd have some specific idea in mind! He struggled when things didnât go the way he planned, if he wanted them a certain way. Usually heâd insist he didnât care and overcompensate in his frustration, make too much of a joke about things in an effort to be cool that was always obvious and annoying. He hadnât done that! But she knew frustration lingered with him and she didnât want that to be what overshadowed their date!
âSeriously. Please donât remember our first date as a failure. Ok, how about this, what if we decide this was just a trial run.â
âUh huh.â
âOur next date is our first date,â she explained, twisting in the seat. It was gross, her tights and skirt squished. âWeâll just keep having first dates until youâre happy.â
âWait, but Iâm happy. Donât make it sound like Iâm not.â
âUh, you arenât though, youâre the only one in this car whoâs unhappy.â
âIâm happy,â he insisted, eyebrows going up, lips pouting. âItâs just not as good as I wanted to do for you, but Iâm happy. Why wouldnât I be? Iâm on a date with Alex Song!â
âOh pleaseâŠâ
âI meant that seriously.â
âYou said it like a joke.â
âI meant it seriously,â he insisted. âI want to impress you, you know? Youâve seen the worst of me for so long, I want you to see the best of me too. Like that I can take you on a really fun, nice date, not that Iâm just some lazy, sex-obsessed assholeâ.â
âI see the best of you all the time too, or I wouldnât be on a date with you in the first place. I already know we can have a great time even when things go wrong. This date was genuinely great but even if it was actually awful, Iâd still have fun with you, itâs one of the things Iâve always⊠liked about you.â Loved about you.
She didnât say it.
She balked.
She didnât know why she didnât say it. She had expected the words to just roll right off her tongue. Because she did, she knew she loved him, and not too long ago she could have said it without any hesitation.
But it meant something more now, and the words tangled up behind her cold teeth.
She hurried to add, âI know that you can be both a really sweet, thoughtful guy and a lazy, sex-obsessedââ
âOk ok,â he huffed, pouting heâd set her up for a zinger like that. He turned on the headlights and sighed. âIâd better get you home so you can put on your jammies. Iâll feel like an asshole if I really do get you sick right before Christmas.â
âIâm the one who insisted on minigolf.â
âOk, itâs your fault then.â
âJungkook!â
âHey donât hit me, Iâm driving! Thatâs just what we need tonight, a car wreck!â
âFine, youâre safe for nowâŠâ
She curled up in her seat and tried not to make it obvious she was staring at him. The streetlights flickering through the rain on the windshield cast spotted shadows on his wet face but she could tell his nose was still red and sniffly.Â
He was cute. And sweet. It was endearing heâd been so serious and competitive about their date. Sheâd known him for so long but still she had learned something new about him tonight: he was not confident on a date. She had always known he had a gooey soft interior but he was so suave with women, she had assumed he would be all confidence and charm on a date. Instead he was a grumpy sulky baby when things werenât going the way he planned.Â
Her grumpy sulky baby. Just like sheâd always wanted. Hot as shit on the outside, sulky baby on the inside.
âWhy are you looking at me like that?â he asked, glancing nervously her way at a red light.
âNothing.â
âTell me.â
âNothing!â
He reached out and sank his fingers into her thigh like a claw.
âNO! Donât tickle me, youâre driving!â she shrieked and tried to fend him off. Fortunately the light turned green, saving her. âRude!â
âI just want to know what you're thinking. Iâm on pins and needles here.â
She decided to tease him more. âWell⊠Iâm thinking Iâd like to see you again.â
âOh? Yeah?â
âYeah. Maybe at our joint family dinner on Christmas Eve?â
âBooo,â he scowled. âBefore that. Thatâs not a date, thatâs a duty.â
âYou want another date before that?â
âYeah.â
âWow, Iâm a really good date, huh?â she grinned.
âYeah, youâre cute.â
âI was joking!â
âIâm not.â
âFine. How about Iâll plan the next date. When are you free, is it on the calendar?â
âYeah, itâs on the calendar. Any time Iâm not working is yours.â
She didnât comment. She couldnât comment on any of these things. Because this was just mundane, joky conversation, but the fact they casually making more plans together hit her like a bus. Part of her brain was like yeah, making plans with Jungkook, totally normal while the other part reminded youâre dating Jungkook.Â
He pulled to a stop in front of her house and started to get out.
âNo donât walk me to the door, itâs still pouring.â
âYeah, butââ
âNo, seriously. My parents might be watching the door anyway.â
âYeah butâŠâ
âHey,â she said. âSave it for the first date. Iâll walk you to your front door at the end of the night.â
âOh youâre driving?â
âYeah, babygirl, we are equals,â she grinned.
âDid you just⊠just âbabygirlâ me?â
âYesssss,â she started to laugh before his fingers even tried to wedge under her shirt again. He kissed her before she caught her breath; she laughed and squirmed and it made their lips slide, the messiest kiss.Â
âK, get out of my car, I need to get home and shower before I get sick,â he said.
âHold on, Jesus, Iâm dizzy.â
âHuh?â
âYou canât just kiss a girl like that and then kick her out of your car, Iâll trip and dieââ
âOk, Iâm walking you in.â
âNo, stay put.â
âYou said youâre dizzy!â
She squeezed his face so full of concern, and shook her head, âGoodnight. Thanks for the amazing date, I had a lot of fun despite your whining about it.â
âHey!â
His shouted protests were swallowed quickly by the rain as she held her coat over her head and ran into her house. She was right that Baba had been watching the door and swung it open to let her in quickly.
âAlex, youâre wet! Did you get caught in the rain?â
âThanks, Baba, goodnight!â Alex sang as she yanked her boots off, tossed her coat, and floated to her room.Â
There in the privacy of her bedroom, she covered her face and let out a silent scream.
He tried so hard!
He cared so much!
He was so handsome!
He was so awkward about their date and god, she loved him for it. Didnât he understand how perfect it was? It was exactly what she had hoped for. The effort. The attention. All for her.Â
She looked forward to teasing him about it for forty years.Â
Especially the photo he posted to his Snap and Insta story of him with a towel around his shoulders, shirt clinging to his body, hair damp and tousled, giving a thumbs-up with the caption yeah everything went wrong but I got a second date so⊠Followed by a text only post on insta lol she ainât on here fam she deleted insta a while ago
So he wasnât talking about their date on insta as some kind of game or lure or to signal to her that he wasnât still trying to hook up with women? He did it just to⊠share? Brag? Signal to women on instagram he wasnât looking? Was he just excited about his date and used to sharing things on social media and didnât think through the impact on his free sex life because that wasnât a priority to him?
âGrrrr why are you so fucking cute,â she grumbled. âIâm supposed to be the cute one. Stay in your hot lane. â
She DMed him a kissy face emoji in response to the story to give him a heart attack and went to shower. And afterwards had a good laugh when the stories and the pre-date photo were gone.
[AlandPals]: đ
[TheJK.97]: đ
[AlandPals]: take off the sunglasses
[TheJK.97]: đ”đȘŠ
[TheJK.97]:Â so uh when did you dl insta?
[AlandPals]: night bunny
[TheJK.97]:Â that is NOT my petname
[TheJK.97]:Â night earwig
[AlandPals]: night weevil
[TheJK.97]:Â night shrimp cocktail
[AlandPals]: night nutter butter
[TheJK.97]:Â night cheeto finger
[AlandPals]: night kookie crisp
[TheJK.97]:Â night booberry
[TheJK.97]:Â night pistachio
[TheJK.97]: night titmouse (thatâs a bird look it up)
[TheJK.97]: did you fall asleep on me??
[TheJK.97]: I win đ
Alex let him have this one. Heâd earned it.
KEEP READING PARTY B
#jungkook x oc#jeon jungkook x oc#jungkook smut#jungkook f2l#jungkook x reader#jeon jungkook x reader#bangtan smut#bts smut#jungkook fanfiction#fuckboy au#jungkook angst#jungkook fluff#jungkook series#jungkook/reader#jungkook/oc#jungkook#tellmewhatchanged#tell me what changed#tmwc#fuckboy jungkook#jeon jungkook ff#jungkook fanfic
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Sometimes I want to bring Morrigan but then I remember I play as a face-tanking rogue and I bring Wynne. Warden Cousland, Morrigan, Wynne / Dragon Age Origins (c) Bioware
#dragon age#dragon age fan art#comic#morrigan#warden cousland#healer#bioware#dao#dragon age origins#hero of ferelden#cousland#wynne#I'm back. I guess.#I did not notice at first but apparently I took a break from tumblr. I've already had several breakdowns over the dashboard.#(turns out I was on the 'for you' tab rather than the 'following' tab. the theme had changed as well. absolutely insufferable.)#I've felt really unconnected for a while but it actually feels better now? as if my tumblr mutuals was the missing link.#very healthy and hot of me ngl#so. I had a two week holiday this year and they were instantly slurped up. it went so fast!#there was this big football thing the week before my holiday - basically teams of teens come from all around the world to play etc.#I heard a girl tell her teammates that 'I'd love to travel on this bus every morning; happy people all around you; just add some music...'#she was also very excited when the bridge opened. the 'happy people' around her sighed bitterly and leaned back for a ten minute wait.#it is thankfully over now. the bus home is no longer stuffed full of football teams. but it's a fun experience for the players etc etc etc#well. in other thrilling news I went to spy on our sister shops during my time off. to see what they do differently. maybe steal some ideas#one store was like an instagram post with fancy teacups and stylish outfits. who knew a second-hand store could be so boring.#the other was like a man-cave with furniture and a passively-aggressive note by the toys stating that 'if u break it u pay. idiot. tnx<3'.#the man-cave was my favourite :)#rant over now! take care and bye etc!
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tears of the cowdom đ§
#borrowed a bigass tablet to draw this with the prospect of buying it if i like it is there and let me tell you#i am deeply in love#with how little my back / arms / shoulders hurt after a day of work#it's nuts#this took like................an hourish#im excited to see what i can make when i have more time#cow#furry#anthro#tears of the kingdom#totk#the legend of zelda#fursona#oc: cow#truesona#my art#also im going tohave to upgrade my clip studio paint since the last time i used it on pc.......#was Release. like i have the debut version#so yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay#but. more relevant. using the debut version means most of my brushes dont work#so this was made all with brushes ive never used!#it was a rlly fun experiment#edit since i changed the caption something something hehee i lied cow isn't a dom :3c
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"It. Is. Going great, now. Innit."
PAPA EMERITUS IV and SISTER IMPERATOR in RITE HERE RITE NOW (with ASHLEY MCBRIDE and KEVIN "JESUS" KAUFMANN)
#right i am obsessed with this scene and how seestor's wheelchair changes into a chair if we're seeing from copia's point of view#it was too quick for me to confirm when i saw this in cinema and i was shook that this is actually the case#rite here rite now#rite here rite now spoilers#ghovie spoilers#the band ghost#papa emeritus iv#user copia edits#user copia all tag#sister imperator#you'd assume this would be quick to make but No it is not. idk if i'll do any more i just wanted to have this scene on loop <3 16 gifs...#could be a record for me. wasn't fun!#taking suggestions for what he spat on the ground btw because i still can't tell what that was#absolute delinquent
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(nature au) you said that while dale dislikes dev using a cane in the house he doesnât really care too much, but what if dev used a cane in public? i canât imagine dale would be okay with that at all. heâd be pissed, like confiscate the cane kind of pissed
Originally the gag here was just going to be Dev clinging onto his dads arm for dear life while he shivers like a chihuahua but he is just. So small.. I couldnt get it to look reasonable
Bonus:
#The horror of putting Dev in a situation where he would 100% be wearing his sunglasses#Like NOOO the perfectly construction expression of horror I was going to give him#fop nature au#fop#fairly oddparents#fop a new wish#fairly oddparents a new wish#fop dev#dev dimmadome#dale dimmadome#fop dale#fop peri#art#digital art#fanart#I cant tell if I got the tone right with this one#Theres a very careful balance I try to strike with comedy vs horror and Im not sure if I got it#I also try to keep a sort of balance when depicting characters that are just straight up awful#I dont like depicting characters as cartoonishly evil but I also dont want to make him seem overly sympathetic#or like he's 'deep down a good person' because he's straight up not#He's awful and selfish. What he's done to his son makes him deeply uncomfortable with himself#but that discomfort means absolutely nothing when he refuses to change or become a better person#and he does refuse to change. changing is hard#he still keeps hurting Dev at every turn and maybe to tries to justify it to himself as being for Devs own good#but regardless he is still refusing to listen to him and hurting him even more in the process#idk im rambling#I like to keep the abuse balanced out with these nothing little concessions on Dales part#tbh even this concession didnt come from the good of his heart he just wanted to avoid making a scene#also because the visual of Dale deciding CARRYING him everywhere is better than just letting him have his cane is very funny to me
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Posting more of my ouaw fanart here because I think Iâd die if I shared it on the discord and one of the party members saw it.
Some guys
Some husbands
0 impulse control
#this one IS grimmorning thank you for asking#grimmorning#Fellas is it gay to subconsciously cling onto your best mate while you sleep because of your haunting and horrible fear of being alone?#asking for a friend#me if drawing characters with little dot eyes was illegal#legends of avantris#once upon a witchlight#morning frost#gricko grimgrin#gideon coal#kremy lecroux#he changes every time I draw him#coalecroux#ALSO WHO WAS GOING TO TELL ME THAT THEIR OTHER SHIP NAME IS KREMBRULE?? THATS SO CUTE??..?#krembrulĂš#I watched ep 41 last night guys what the freak#this one is a lot less effort than the other ones but something is coming soon đ€«đ€«đ€«#I KEEP EFFING FORGETTING KREMYS MUSTACHE WHATEVER IT SMUDGED OFF NOW
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