#teddy fic

[weathertheraine]

keep me intact - chapter 12

Chapter summary:

Tonight, the night before the second training camp, Tadashi is sleeping over. While Kei sits with his laptop, dreading being flattened all over again - for six days straight, this time, instead of just two - Tadashi is buzzing. He paces the room as he chatters, half to himself, and draws out the shapes of the new attacks with his hands as if he can see Coach Ukai’s diagrams in the air. As if he’s going to be in the matches for more than a few seconds. As if the practice matches matter at all.

Fic Tags:

Tsukkiyama / Slow Burn / Childhood friends / Canon compliant (mostly) / t4t (trans boy Tsukishima and trans boy Yamaguchi) / Kei POV

Read chapter 12

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[thebearer]

making the bed |carmen berzatto x reader| part one

prompt: carmen's stressed. food critics, a newborn baby, balancing work life and married life and now dad life; he's bound to break, everyone knows it. but no one ever thought he'd lash out on you.

or, part one of the devastation fic. based off this ask from the other day. two more parts to come.

contains: mega angst. mega angst, with no resolution in this part. hurt, no comfort (in this chapter, will be later in part 3). mean!carmen, very mean. mom!reader x dad!carmen with newborn teddy. fighting, language, carmen says mean stuff he doesn't mean. past mentions of trauma, family trauma, mikey mentioned. very angsty and a little heavy, please read at your own discretion. word count- 3.5k+.

"Are you ok?"

Carmen now understood why that phrase used to send Donna into such a blind rage, lips pursing and jaw clenching more and more every time he heard it. First at work, then with you, it felt never ending.

It was beginning to feel like critic season with how many were coming in, snooty and demanding to be impressed. It couldn't have come at a worst time, right in the middle of busy season with the start of the holidays. Days at The Bear were filled with frantic panic, running around, making sure everything was perfect, accounted for, and Carmen always had the sinking feeling it wasn't- that he'd forgotten something, messed something up. 

It wasn't rare for him to work himself up like this, a normal that you always warned him about, but he'd always had a solitude. As long as he'd known you, he'd had a place to go, to unwind, to let himself rest and reset with you. And he still did, it was just shared now with a newborn.

Dorothea Michelle. Teddy, for short. The light of his life, yours too. Nearly two months old with a set of lungs that sounded much louder, much more developed than that. Nights were long, sleepless, spent trying to lull Teddy back to sleep, awake even if he wasn't up with her. Carmen couldn't allow himself the selfishness to relax, to rewind, to "take it easy" like everyone told him to. At work, he was the boss; at home, he was a dad.

"Fuck, fuck," Carmen's sleepy stare was broken by a lick of bubbling heat, the lamb's roux popping with the high heat, splashing all over Carmen's chef whites.

"Jeff, c'mon," Tina clicked, shaking her head, moving the pan to lower heat. "What're you doin'?"

Carmen grit his teeth, snatching a rag off the stainless steel counter tops, scrubbing the burgundy stain, huffing when it only spread the stain.

"What happened?" Sydney turned, looking from the burnt sauce to Carmen's stained chef shirt. "Oh,"

"Do we have a spare coat?" Carmen huffed, throwing the rag down with a firm smack against the counter.

"I don't think so, Carm." Sydney shook her head. "You took the last ones home with you two days ago. The wine-"

"-I know, Chef, I know." Carmen snapped, running a hand through his hair. "Fuck, I-I can't fuckin' serve the critics lookin' like this. With shit all over me- fuck."

"Hey, easy, easy," Richie turned the corner, his hands held up. "What's goin' on?"

"Jeff got sauce over him. He doesn't have any clean clothes." Tina muttered, irritated that she had to fix his mess, more irritated that he wasn't taking care of himself. You have a baby, Jeff, you need to rest and take some time, she'd told him. Carmen only waved her off.

"Okay, okay, hey, that's no problem." Richie's voice raised, lifting over Carmen's. "You go home and change, get your spare, check on my beautiful goddaughter, and then come back with your A game. Yes?"

Carmen didn't even humor him with a snarky remark, yanking his coat off and stomping towards the office to grab his things. Richie and Tina looked at each other, shaking their head gently.

"Kids runnin' thin, T." Richie muttered with a sigh. "He's gonna break. It's gonna be bad."

"Yeah, he is. Gonna wear himself out before then." Tina shook her head. "Jeff needs a vacation." They both jumped at the slamming of the backdoor, Carmen's angry exit shaking the foundation.

"Needs to be fuckin' medicated. Fuckin' lunatic." Richie scoffed, rolling his eyes at Carmen's dramatics.

The drive home was filled with silence, Carmen's iron grip on the wheel, tearing through the traffic towards the house- his house, his home. 

Home, but it didn't provide the same comfort that it usually did. Carmen's shoulders still stayed tense, buzzing with rage, not dissipating when he thought of you, or of Teddy, knowing you'd both be there, excited to see him. 

You jumped at the sound of the car door slamming, peeking out the window to see Carmen's parked next to yours, furiously stomping up the front steps. You frowned, grabbing the baby monitor, walking towards the front door.

Carmen nearly hit you with how fiercely he flung the door open. "Woah," You reached for the door, stopping it before he could flick it shut. "Carm, don't slam it. Teddy's asleep. I just got her down." You frowned at him, shutting it slowly.

Carmen looked at you but didn't speak, looking through you with a rage that had your spine tingling before he finally broke his gaze, stomping towards the laundry room. "Carm? What’re you doing home? Don’t you have dinner soon?" You hesitated slightly, lingering in the doorway with an uncertainty you hadn’t felt with Carmen before. 

Carmen didn’t answer, his jaw still ground tight while he rummaged through the clean clothes, carelessly unfolding and shifting the folded clothes.

"Carmen," You said more firmly, caching his gaze. He didn't speak still, just stared at you- through you. "Are you ok?" You lifted a brow, features softening in worry.

Carmen paused, eyes closing, shoulders tensing in agitation. Are you ok? His ears rang, a familiar rage that he hadn't felt in years bubbling up deep in his chest. Frustrated and blinding and rampant, heat rushing through his veins, pulling himself further and further from reality into someplace different- someplace darker in his mind. 

"What's wrong?" You pressed, he could barely hear it, ears ringing at your question. "Did something happen? Did the critic come-"

"-Where's my chef whites?" Carmen barked, cutting you off, his chest tightening more and more with every heavy heave of his chest. You flinched at his tone.

"Uh, I-I haven't seen the whites. I washed your white tee-"

“-You what? Y-You what?” Carmen spat, eye widening with a wild, raged glint in his eye. Your stomach flipped and fell with fear, stepping back instinctively. 

“I-I washed your tee, Carm, that’s all that you left in the laundry basket-” 

"-Are you fucking kidding me?" Carmen boomed, his head spinning, body buzzing with rage. Your breath hitched, frozen in fear at the anger in his tone, the roar of his voice bouncing off the walls, echoing through your ears in a painful drum. 

Carmen moved, snatching the dirty clothes basket, dumping it into the ground with a shake until the dirty chef coat fell on top. He gripped the basket, flinging it across the room with a hard throw. The final push to his bad mood that sent him right over the edge, crashing into a pit of blinding fury, aggravation, breaking him from the inside out.

"Fuck!" Carmen roared, his voice shaking the walls, your breath leaving your lungs in a trembling exhale of fear. “Fuck, fuck, fuck! This is- This is- Are you fuckin’ kiddin’ me?” 

You tensed in shock, gripping the baby monitor in fear, maybe surprise, as it started to buzz to life with Teddy's startled whimpers. Her small cries pulled you out of your frozen state, something deeper than fear replacing the ache in your stomach. 

"Carmen-" You gaped, voice wobbling with uncertainty, taking slow shuffled steps towards the stairs. “Carmen, calm-calm down. Ok? Calm down.” 

“Calm down? You want me to fuckin’ calm down?” Carmen sneered, an angry red flush blossoming in splotchy deep hues up his neck, towards his cheeks. “You don’t do shit, nothin’ that I fuckin’ ask for! Just sit around all fuckin’ day an-and I’m supposed to calm down?” 

“Carmen,” Your voice wobbled, throat tight with tears, hurt and fear strangling your words. “I-You didn’t ask me to wash them. I-I didn’t know. They weren’t in the hamper-” 

“-I shouldn’t have to ask you to wash them!” Carmen roared, eyes so wide you thought they might pop right out of his head, neck vein protruding on exemplifying his rage. “You know what I’m going through! You know how much fuckin’ stress I’m under! I go to that-that shit hole, an-and work my fuckin’ ass off so you don’t have to! Then I come home, and I-I can’t even get a second of peace!” 

“Stop,” You hiss, finally regaining your composure, his words fully sinking into you  now, feeling the full effect of them. “I-I just had a baby. I’m still on maternity leave taking care of a baby- our baby, and I’m tired too. But I’m not yelling at you-” 

“-Oh, right. Right.” Carmen laughs sarcastically, humorless as he runs his hand down his face. It felt mocking, left you feeling small and too vulnerable for your liking. “Because in between your napping an-and feeding, you couldn’t stick a fucking jacket in the wash, right? You’re so busy.”  

“What is wrong with you?” You snap, hoping he can’t hear the tears in your voice, the way your voice shakes with emotion. 

“What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with me?” Carmen scoffs, throwing his hands out. “I get no fuckin' sleep, go work my fuckin' ass off, a-and then I come home so I can go back and work my ass off some more, and-and you can’t do one simple fuckin’ thing? You can’t help me out? And then you wanna know what’s wrong with me? When you sit on your ass all fuckin’ day-” 

Teddy’s piercing wail pulls you out of your shocked trance, nose and throat burning with hurt filled tears you refuse to shed. Instead, you turn, climbing the stairs on shaky legs, the sound of Teddy’s cries growing louder and louder. Anchovy watches you from the top of the stairs, sensing the tension, your upset, sliding against your leg as if to comfort you. 

Carmen scoffs, hands buzzing and trembling with rage, the ringing in his ears growing louder and louder with each of your footsteps on the stairs and down the hall. He can barely hear Teddy’s sobs, hands threading through his hair, pulling at his scalp. He sees you walk towards the bedroom, quickly, hugging Teddy to your chest. 

“Oh, don’t go fuckin’ do it now!” Carmen roared, your ignoring him only infuriating him further. “It won’t be ready in time now. I’ll just look like a fuckin’ idiot for the critic tonight! Not that you care! Why would you, huh? I-I mean just our livelihood, just our fuckin’ income!” 

You swallowed back your tears, head tilting towards the ceiling, hands shaking with every shove of your things into the overnight bag. Just enough to get you through the night, the next day. A few essentials, Teddy’s spare onesies, a charger, your wallet- you stopped mid-shove of your items into the weekender bag, the sun’s rays catching in your wedding ring. Your heart fell, more and more, you weren’t sure how that was even possible. 

Carmen’s furious voice was still booming from downstairs, ringing and shaking in his furious fit. Richie and Sugar both warned you about Carmen’s tantrums, brought them up to embarrass him, tease him about it until he was red faced and hissing hushed threats at them. You never, never in your wildest dreams thought you’d be on the receiving end of one. 

You jumped, another slam of something Carmen had thrown, maybe hit in a fit of rage, causing Teddy to wail louder, Anchovy skittering nervously away. Tears leaked out of your eyes, twisting the ring off your finger, setting it on Carmen’s bedside table. Pulling the carrier out of the closet, Anchovy got in much easier than usual, which you were thankful for. 

Carmen was gripping the marble of the countertop when he heard you again, walking from the bottom of the stairs, quick steps towards the door to the garage, Teddy’s voice nearly hoarse from her crying. You kept your head high, tunnel-visioned towards your car, ignoring his heavy breathing and frantic pacing. 

“Wha-What are you doin’?” Carmen’s voice was softer now, still with a jagged edge that was cutting and harsh. The car door opened, the baby carrier hooked into the car seat. 

“Hey, wha- what are you- where’re you goin’? What’re you doin’?” Carmen’s heart dropped in a damning rush of hour, stumbling on heavy legs towards the garage. You ignored him, shushing Teddy gently, running a calming hand over her wet cheek, trying to coax her paci into her mouth. 

“Baby, no-no, no. Hey, no, I-I- What-” Carmen’s chest felt tight, mind numbing and racing, stuttering nervously. You reached for your bag, his hand reaching to grab the strap. “Whe-Where’re you-”

“-Don’t touch me.” You hissed, teeth bared, eyes shining with tears. Carmen flinched, pulling his hand back like he’d touched a hot stove. “Don’t you dare fucking touch me.” You sneered, pinning him with a watery glare that had his stomach turning in sickening fear. 

“Baby, hey, w-wait-C’mon, d-don’t-You don’t, you don’t need to do this, ok? I-I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Carmen choked out the words, frantic and unsure, his hands shaking when they ghosted over you back just for a moment. Wanting to touch you, to hold you, to grab you and keep you from leaving, but too scared to. Instead, he grabbed the car door you flung open, holding it when you tried to yank it closed. 

“Let go.” You hissed, sniffling back wet, snotty tears of fury and hurt. 

“Please, don’t-do-don’t do this. Please, baby, I-I’m sorry.” Carmen begged, blue eyes deepening with the burning red hues of tears, bloodshot and lashes wet. “Don’t-Don’t do this-” 

“-I didn’t do this.” You sneered, leaving Carmen flinching at your words. “Don’t you dare try to say this was me. After how you just talked to me? The shit you said to me in there? You think I’m going to stay?” Your voice cracked with emotion, lips pressing together to keep a cry in. 

“No, no, no, no, no, baby, please. Please, ju-just come inside. Come inside, please? Please, don’t-” 

“You don’t get to talk to me like that. To say that kinda stuff to me. That hurt, Carmen. That was mean.” You glared at him, tears leaking out of the corner of his eyes. “I don’t care if you’re stressed. I don’t care what’s going on- nothing, and I mean nothing, warrants you talking to me like that. Just because you fucked up, because you forgot to ask me to do it, because you’re stressed out- I don’t care what it is. You don’t talk to me like that, say those things when I’ve been home all day taking care of my ch- our child.” You nod back towards the sniffling baby, whimpering and crying half heartedly, her little eyelids drooping with sleep that was interrupted. 

Carmen felt sick, his knees tightening in fear, he was sure they might give out, that he might fall to the ground right there. Looking at the tiny baby, lip jutted and shaking in the mirror hooked on the back of the seat, then back at you, eyes red-rimmed and glaring at him with a hurt filled anger. 

“Don’t-” Carmen’s chest shook, a white-knuckled grip on the door. 

Your own hand curled around the door’s inner handle, yanking it away from him. “Move,” You hissed, pulling again. 

Carmen wasn’t sure why he let it go, why he let you shut it, locking the door in case he tried to open it again. Why he let you pull out of the driveway, why he didn’t stop you, why he didn’t run after you, only taking soft shuffles down the drive like a zombie as you drove away. Standing in the drive, Carmen swallowed down the spit that pooled in his mouth, stomach churning, sure he was going to be sick. 

He managed to trudge back to the garage, mind racing and far away, the ringing in his ears dulling but still deafening. It felt like he was in a dream- a nightmare, a hallucinating trance that felt like a sick, sick dream- Carmen was hoping it was. That he’d wake up and find you next to him asleep. That he could hug you, pull you into him, nose buried in your neck, still warm from your slumber. 

As the sun began to sink low into the sky, minutes turning into hours that Carmen sat motionless in the garage, staring in a trancelike state, he realized that this wasn’t a dream or a nightmare. No this was his reality, a horrific reality that he’d made into his own. Carmen sat, eyes trained on the concrete of the garage, voice racing and blending in his mind- his words, yours, Teddy’s cries, Natalie and Richie’s, flashbacks of his mother screaming fits. 

He didn’t move, frozen in chilling, eerie fear. What ifs and terrifying possible scenarios, consequences to his own actions that left him feeling sick, hands trembling. A spiraling of fears that only drug him deeper and deeper with every haunting replay of his outburst. Even the flashing of headlights turning into the driveway, filling the garage with light, didn’t pull him from his trance. 

“The fuck is he- Cousin!” Richie roared, laying on the horn. Carmen didn’t move, didn’t acknowledge that he heard it, only stared. Richie frowned, turning the car off, throwing the door open. 

“Cousin? Carm? What-What are you doin’? Dinner service started an hour ago. Syd is freakin’ the fuck out.” Richie threw his hands up, walking towards the man who still didn’t move. Richie’s heart skipped, flashbacks of Mikey flooding into his vision, parallels of the two brothers blurring before him. 

“Yo, Carm, you-you good?” Richie stepped into the garage, his spine tingling with icy fear. It was quiet, an eerie, unsettling quiet. “Cousin, hey, what-what’s wrong?” 

Carmen's chest rose and fell, tighter and tighter. He was suffocating, head spinning and mind racing so fast he felt light headed. He could barely hear Richie’s voice over the noise in his head, Richie’s hand shaking his shoulder finally breaking his trance enough to meet his eyes, rounded in fear filled question. 

“Carmen, what’s wrong? Is it- Don’t fuckin’ tell me it’s the baby. What the fuck is goin’ on-” 

“-She left.” Carmen’s voice shook, raspy and scared. His tongue still felt too thick, head still spinning. He wasn’t even sure he said it, Richie’s widening eyes the only thing confirming that he had said it. 

“What? Who-Who left? Who?” Richie looked around, like the clues might be there, sure that Carmen wasn’t talking about you. No, he wouldn’t- he couldn’t. Not you. 

Carmen’s breath hitched, a strangling of a sob caught in his throat, running his hand over his face. Richie didn’t miss the way it trembled, shaking even as it rested over his eyes. Your car was gone, the house too quiet, no baby Teddy crying, nothing but silence was left. 

Richie’s heartbeat crawled into a rapid, scared pace. “Why? Wh-Why would she-” Richie looked at Carmen, eyes wide but still, reading his expression. “No. No, Cousin, no. What-What did you do? Carmen,” Richie grabbed both his shoulders, shaking him lightly until he met his gaze. “What did you do?” 

Carmen’s face began to crack, behind his eyes, Richie could see flashbacks of something- something he didn’t know what, but whatever it was, it was painful. That was evident by the fear that glossed over Carmen’s eyes, realization and horror. Carmen’s shoulders shook, frame rocking with a sob he tried to swallow, but couldn’t. Deep cries, guttural sobs breaking out of his frame, heels of his hands pressed to his eyes, fingers curled and clenched around his greasy curls in agony. 

The damning realization flooded over him, that you’d left. 

You’d left, you’d taken Teddy, taken Anchovy- you’d left because he’d driven you away. His angry outburst, petulant, mean, hurtful- he’d been so cruel to you. You. His wife, the love of his life, mother of his child, the one person who loved him endlessly without stipulations or boundaries, the one person who truly understood him. 

And he’d driven you away. 

He wished he could blame his mom, his dad, his family for fucking him up so severely, maybe Mikey, even, for leaving him the shit show that was the restaurant, making his anxieties worse and fuse shorter. But sitting in the empty garage, Richie standing above him in silent shock, his sobs and angry sniffles echoing off the cement floor, Carmen knew he had no one to blame but himself. 

He’d fucked up. Really fucked up. Fucked up in a way that made all the other times look obsolete. 

Carmen had fucked up, and for once, he didn’t know what to do. He couldn’t avoid it, ignore it, deflect it like other times. Half hearted apologies and promises of change wouldn’t work, you weren’t here for him to even try to give them to you, and he didn’t know where you went. 

Carmen wasn’t sure where you went, how to fix this, why he’d done what he did, and a million other things that raced through his mind. What he did know, sitting in the too quiet garage, chest stuttering with heaving cries, was that he’d do anything. 

Anything, to get you back home. To make it right. To fix this and make it up to you. 

He wasn’t sure how, but he’d give up everything. Anything. His restaurant, his dreams, his hopes, his life, at this point, to make it up to you. 

[hoe4hotchner]

Can't Sleep Without You | [A.H]

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x gn!Reader

CW: Insomnia, emotional distress, frustration, hurt/comfort, brief mention of crying

WC: 0.7k

Summary: It's the middle of the night, and you can't sleep. With Aaron away on a case, the loneliness and exhaustion become overwhelming. Feeling desperate, you call him.

This is part of #Teddy-ber hosted by @angellsell

The clock on the nightstand glared at you - 3:24 a.m. The room felt unbearably quiet, the emptiness next to you was a cruel reminder that Aaron was gone, hundreds of miles away on the opposite side of the country. You’d been tossing and turning for hours, exhaustion weighing down your body but keeping sleep just out of reach. No matter how hard you tried, your mind wouldn’t stop racing. Every thought seemed louder, more overwhelming without him there to calm you.

You sat up, running a hand through your hair in frustration, a tear slipping down your cheek before you could stop it. You were exhausted - beyond exhausted - and the frustration was boiling over into something you couldn’t quite control. It wasn’t fair. Why couldn’t you just sleep?

Your hand hovered over your phone. You didn’t want to bother him, not while he was on a case. But the loneliness was too much, and the ache of missing him only deepened the longer you lay there. With a shaky breath, you pressed his number, hoping you weren’t interrupting him.

The phone rang twice before Aaron picked up, his voice quiet but instantly concerned. “Sweetheart? What’s wrong?”

Just hearing his voice cracked something inside you. All the frustration, all the sleepless hours, everything you had been trying to hold in came crashing down. “I can’t do this, Aaron,” you said, your voice tight and trembling. “I can’t sleep. I’ve been trying for hours, and nothing’s working. I just… I just want to sleep, and I can’t.”

You could hear him sit down on the other end, the rustle of sheets of paper as he adjusted. “Hey, hey,” he soothed, his voice instantly gentle, “Take a breath for me, okay?”

But it wasn’t. The frustration was too much, and now you felt embarrassed on top of everything else. "It’s not okay,” you snapped, a sob catching in your throat. “I’m exhausted, Aaron. I’ve tried everything. I’m so… tired.”

Hot tears streamed down your face as the exhaustion crashed over you, leaving you feeling helpless. “I just want to sleep,” you repeated, your voice breaking. “I hate this. I hate that you’re not here. I feel so… alone.”

The line was silent for a moment, but when Aaron spoke again, his voice was tender. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. I wish I could be there with you right now. I hate being apart.”

His words only made the ache grow, but there was something calming about his presence, even through the phone. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” you whispered, feeling small and defeated. “I’m just so tired.”

“Nothing’s wrong with you,” he reassured softly. “You’re overwhelmed, and it’s okay to feel like that. I’m right here. Even if I can’t hold you, I’m still with you.”

Your breath hitched as you tried to calm down, but the tears kept coming. It felt like you were unraveling. “I miss you so much,” you admitted, your voice raw. “I can’t sleep without you.”

“I know,” he whispered. “I miss you, too. Try to focus on my voice.” You closed your eyes, curling into yourself on the bed, clutching the phone like a lifeline. “I’m going to help you through it. Just breathe with me. Can you do that?”

You nodded, trying to match your breathing to his calm, steady voice. “Yeah… I can try.”

“That’s all I need you to do,” he murmured. “Take a deep breath, sweetheart. You’re safe. I’m with you.”

Slowly, the tightness in your chest began to ease. The exhaustion still clung to you, but the sharp edges of your frustration started to soften. Aaron stayed on the line, his voice a quiet hum as he guided you through each breath.

“You’re doing so well,” he whispered. “You’re okay. I’m proud of you for holding on.”

You sniffled, wiping at your eyes. “I don’t feel okay.”

“I know,” he said softly. “I’m going to stay on the phone as long as you need.”

The comfort in his words, in his unwavering presence, soothed the storm inside you just enough that your body finally started to relax. The heaviness in your eyelids returned, and this time, it wasn’t suffocating - it was an invitation to finally rest.

“I love you,” you mumbled, your voice thick with sleep.

“I love you, too,” Aaron whispered back, his voice the last thing you heard as sleep finally began to take over. “Sleep, sweetheart.”

Slowly, you drifted off into a deep, peaceful sleep, his voice and the promise of his love still lingering in the darkness.

[bunny-1111]

Doctor Nott - Theo Nott x reader

Description: Theo takes care of the reader while she's sick

Short Fluff <3 - word count 500 words

reblogs and comments are appreciated Xx

...

Theodore waited in the great hall. And waited, and waited. 'She's probably just slept in', he thought until more time passed, and breakfast was nearing finished.

Thats when his mind drove him mad, he snapped his head at Pansy. "Pans, where the hell is she" he asked, worry written all over his face

"Oh, she didn't tell you? She's sick Theo, probably didn't want you worrying" Pansy explained biting into her toast

"Fuck sake" Theo muttered, leaving his seat immediately, heading straight for your dorm

"See, Theo, this is why she didn't tell you!" Pansy called out

he shook his head as he walked towards your dorm; why the fuck didn't you tell him? Why wouldn't you want his help? When he had explained to you so many times, that's all he wanted to do. Take care of you, in every way.

Turning the doorknob, Theodore wasted no time letting himself in.

He was met with the sight of sickness in the human form.

"Fuck, baby you look like shit" he called out, quickly sitting by your side, hand on your forehead, feeling your temperature.

"I'm Ok, Theo, really, I'm much better than last night, even Pansy agreed this morning" you say trying to smile.

"You were worse than THIS last night and neither of you called me?!" he exclaimed eyes widening

"Teddy, I didn't want to stress you out, look at you!" you explained

"No this, this is what stressing me out, you not telling me, pushed me over the edge, what about when we get married one day, huh, through sickness and health, alright that doesn't start in the future, it's starts now" he ranted on

before you could even reply he was huffing, crawling into your bed, you tried to push him away

"No Theo, I'll get you sick!"

He stopped for a moment scoffed his face at you, and said

"Baby, does it really look or sound like I care about getting sick, let me take care of you".

How could you say no to that.

So, for the rest of the day, he nursed you better, and by two passing days, you were back to perfect health.

Walking to the great hall, arm around Theos, you express your gratitude

"Thank you, doctor Nott. I wouldn't have at all survived without you" you laugh, giving him a kiss

He laughed back and returned the kiss deeper.

As you sat side-by-side in the great hall, you noticed Theodore's body start to heat up beside you. Looking over, Theodore let out a sneeze,

"Oh no," you said "I'm fine", he quickly retorted, followed by another sneeze.

"you're sick, I got you sick" you frowned

"I'm not." Theodore insisted, voice straining by the second

"Let's go. Your turn to get healthy," You say, forcing his body off his seat

"Please, really, I'm-" he started

"Like you said, baby, in sickness and health," he smiled at the fact that you were able to use his own words against him so soon, dragging him towards his dorm. Theodore secretly wanted to smile; a couple of days of you taking care of him couldn't hurt; actually, it was just the remedy.

Requests now open x

reblogs appreciated my loves Xx

Oh to have Theodore take care of your whole being sick, fml

[brandileigh2003]

Raising Harry and/or teddy recs. I know I'm missing some so send me your faves or self rec ❤️❤️

-orange juice (i've been ready for you to come home for so long) by raggedypond get back together ft Chronic Illness

-my love, take care of yourself by @littleoldrachel ft mental health and chronic

-Anything that msalexwp writes that includes the trope is fantastic

Let's Play Pretend muggle fake dating real feelings

Second Generation get back together

-the sea is a good place to think of the future by peachyybabe get back together ft Chronic Illness @lavenderhaze

-Like Real People Do by thirdcrow: coffee shop, great disability rep

-An Infinte Ocean by orphan_account muggle get together

-We’ll Make It Out Alive by wolfstar_addict417: muggle texting kidfic

-Blue Moon Café by @lazuli-moon raising teddy coffee shop

-Forever Is a State of Mind -orphaned account ft deaf remus

-Of Bookshelves and Baby Carriers by @poppunkpadfoot

-the mayors of simpleton by @fruityindividual older wolfstar get back together ft blind remus

-Till We Have Arrived Home Again by prouvairing divergent

-Of Quiet Hearts And Thundering Dreams by @tracingpatternswrites

-Spare! by B1ackCatChatsBack muggle get together

-I didn’t sign up for this by Moonystoastandmarsbars get back together

-Of Protein Powders and PTAs by @squintclover and TracingPatterns magical divergent

-A Wolf, A Bear, A Dungeon Master, and Boy Wonder by @ratmom819 ft chronic illness

-Puppy Magic by @demonbanisher thefifthmarauder17 magical divergent

-what a wonder (what a waste) by peachyybabe mcd magical divergent ft trans remus, mental illness and

-Aging Gracelessly by orphan_account older wolfstar texting

-So I'll Take My) Good Fortune by orphan_account muggle uni

-The Molinete & the Media Luna by punkwolfstar ft disability

-beautiful boy (darling boy) by @impishtubist and roaming_the_greenwood1: magical divergent ft trans remus

-Multiplying Parents by @heartofspells harry wants to find Sirius a bf

-ten reasons (to go to michigan) by @greyeyedmonster-18 muggle au get together

-The Things I Did by Lolo_row divergent

-Of Memories and Milk Thievery by moonymoment older wolfstar get back together @mayescapade

-Basilisks, Boggarts and Boyfriends (oh my) by OptimisticDinosaur

-Of Caffeine Addictions and Nail Polish by BlueAzalea au pining and fluff

Check out my fandom wife lucigoo she has some wonderful ones

Common Woodbrown by @imochan

that’s the art of getting by sarewolf

----Self rec: parks and playdates ft disability plus trans and asexual remus

~~Others' recs ~~

-Wherever I am/ you will always be - BrigidFaye

(anon): Under Foot, Under Moon by sometimeswelose

-An unexpected reunion- r33sesPieces

Rhythm & Blues by lez_writes13

stealing harry by @copperbadge

-Blanket Fort by @samynnad102687 : Regulus, James, and Harry build a blanket fort.

-Trick-or-Treating by Samynnad102687: The Marauders, Regulus, and Lily take Harry Trick-or-Treating.

-Unbound by you by friendlyneighborhoodtrickster, TracingPatterns

-Moonless Nights by @sliebman10 Sirius is trying to rebuild his life after the fateful Halloween of 1981. He's struggling to come to terms with Remus's betrayal and his new role as Harry's guardian.

-Family Vacation by sliebman10: Sirius is skeptical that a family resort is where he wants to spend his first summer vacation with Harry there, but he comes to see its merits when he meets Remus and his family.

-All the soul and body scars by 1point21

-To build a family - secondsister

-Forever live and die - wolfpants

--feel free to check it my main rec list

Also - the wolfstar librarian has awesome collections for raising harry

[meameagirl]

Injury! -- Joe Burrow

Summary: Joe was away for a game and you couldn't go as he was gone you got hurt. You was freaking out but also worry to tell Joe as he at a game.

Word Count: 744

Slightly injury you, head injury, little blood , just Joe worry and fluffy

----------

Joe was at an away game and You had gone to a store to buy some decorations for their apartment. You just came back and set the bags on the table. You knew it was smart to wait for Joe to come home but You didn't want to wait another whole day for him to return. You start taking all the things you got and lay it out on the table. It was a little early to start putting Christmas things out but You couldn't help yourself.

You went to the garage to look for some nails and Joe’s hammer he kept here. Soon You find the hammer and nails and go back to the kitchen. You grab the Christmas Gnome and walk to the living room to put the nail in the wall and hang them up. Soon you walk back in the kitchen and grab the christmas garland and you glaze at the cabinet. “I should wait for him.” You told yourself but you being stubborn You don't listen.

You take your shoes off and only have socks on and climb on the counter and stand up on it. You look down. “Not too high I should be fine.” You said to yourself. You start putting the nail in the wall and grab the garland. You get on your tiptoes to hook the garland on the nail. When your foot slips off and you crash onto the floor head hitting the edge of the counter. You lightly groan, touch your head feeling wetness on your hand.

You start looking around feeling dizzy, slowly grab the counter to help you stand up. You grabbed a rag and got it wet with cold water. Press it on your head. You stay leaning on the counter with the rag on your head when your phone rings. You slowly dig it out your pocket seeing it was Jeo who was calling. “I swear he has super power and calls at the wrong time.” You softled said as you answered it.

You hear his voice didn't sound cheerful, must have had a bad game. “After that game I need your voice.” You swallow. He started to explain what happened but it was making your head hurt more so  you cut him off. “I did something stupid.” It got quiet on his end. Soon he says “What you did Y/N” You look up at the half hanging garland. “Might try to hang some garland in the kitchen and slip and hit my head.” You talk slowly. 

It got quiet again but you can hear he was getting up from the hotel bed. You hear him picking things up. Maybe his bag. “Joe?” Joe signs. “Didn't I tell you if you wanna hang something make sure I was home. So I can help so we can skip the whole injury park Y/N. Look, I'm on my way home. Clearly your stubborn ass doesn't understand when I talk. You're gonna listen now. Forget the damn garland and lay down just not flat.i be there in an hour or so.” You nodded even if he can’t see it. He hung up after.

This is why you hated that he called right after you fell. Were you gonna tell him no, maybe tomorrow when he was home. But that was so out of the bag. You knew it was better to listen to him and go lay down. You slowly walk to the couch and lay down on it. The rag lay on your head.

About an hour or two you hear the front getting unlocked and open. You hear his footsteps walk in. He puts his bag down and he walks over kneeling by the couch. He moved the rag. “Hey there, stubborn girl that I love.” You just groan and sit up. He helps you sit up, putting his hand on your back. “How your head darling” He asks as you lean your head on his shoulder. “Dizzy stops and the pain is not too bad.” Joe kisses your head lightly. “Maybe you learn your lesson and let me do the hanging when it comes to Christmas. Rather not have my girlfriend hurt over Christmas crap.” His arm wraps around you as you mumbles “good idea.” you snuggle against his body. And he gives you another kiss on your head. Getting hurt might have been a good thing, one Joe came home early and second the cuddles.

[tvseries-writings]

We care about you

Maya x Carina x reader (Amelia is reader’s bff)

Prompt: Reader has a car crash with Carina’s car and she feels so guilty that she refuses to go to the hospital and it’s not the best choice.

TW: car crash, seizure

When you open your eyes, your first thought does not go to the probable concussion you gave yourself, nor to the poor light pole you knocked down. No, your concern becomes the car: the Carina's very expensive and beautiful Porsche that you have just crumpled against a stupid pole that you could very well have avoided, had the road not been wet. Your thoughts are interrupted by the sound of the driver's door, yours, suddenly opening.

"Miss, miss can you hear me? Y/n?"

Vic's face appears in front of you, and as soon as he notices it's you, her gaze changes from a calm and placid one to one quite panicked.

"Are you okay? Do you want me to call Maya and Carina?"

Vic unbuckles your belt, intimating you to stay still while she checks you over. She feels your legs, asking if you can feel them. You nod. By the feel of the pain in your ribs, you probably have one or two cracked if not broken ribs, blood is pouring out of your nose since the airbag exploded in your face, and most likely the deep cut on your forehead indicates a more serious concussion than you would have liked but you don't care. The only thing you care about is the car, and right now you really have no other concerns besides.

"Were other people involved?"

"No, just a poor pole. But I don't think it will complain. We need to get you to Grey's Sloan. Montgomery, Warren! Give me a hand, we-"

"No."

Relief floods you as soon as Vic confirms that no one else besides you was involved in the accident. You know full well that it could have been worse, yet you refuse to go to the hospital, you won't let anyone waste time because of your stupid mistake. Carina's car...you destroyed it, the Italian loves that car and you literally crumpled it for her.

"Y/n, you know you have to go to the hospital. Maya and Carina would kill me if they knew I didn't take you to the hospital...please don't make me carry you or call them."

You shake your head, immediately regretting it as soon as you do when a twinge in your head makes you squint in pain.

"No, Carina is going to kill me as soon as she sees what I've done to her car..Vic, you don't understand. She loves this car more than anything, she went to pick it out with Andrew as soon as she got to Seattle-" a sob involuntarily escapes your mouth as your body is shaken as more follow. Tears line your cheeks and though you want to stop them, you really don't have the strength.

"Y/n, Carina loves you more than a stupid car...she won't care if-"

"No Vic, you don't understand, I don't want to go to the hospital, please, please, I can't look at Carina and tell her that I destroyed one of the things that reminded her of her brother. Please Vic, take me home, don't take me to Grey's Sloan. Please."

You plead with her and see her struggling internally with herself, even turning a glance over her shoulder where Ben and Travis, having heard it all, are struggling in the same dilemma as she is. Then, Vic shakes his head and you decide that you have just chosen which battle to fight, at least for the next few minutes.

"I'm sorry y/n but we need to get you checked out and Grey's Sloan is the closest. I'm really sorry."

You shake your head, tears continue copiously to line your face, and the adrenaline slowly begins to fade, making your head feel lighter and your chest feel heavier.

"No Vic, this is not your choice. I am conscious and aware of my actions, legally you have no right to transport me anywhere unless I have harmed other people."

You use your best lawyerly tone, the same tone you use in the courtroom and see them exchange a look and then nod.

"You're right, legally we can't force you but we can call Maya and Carina, y/n."

You grit your teeth; this was an option you had not calculated but, instead, you come up with an idea that is better than the others and will probably save you from going to the hospital. As they say, if Muhammad does not go to the mountain then the mountain will go to Muhammad.

....................................................................................................................

"Thank you for coming."

Amelia shakes her head, a look of disapproval quite legible on her face.

"Well, when your best friend as well as roommate for a good six years of college calls you and tells you she's been in an accident, it's hard not to check in on her."

You smile at her, and before you can try to speak, she's asking you rapid-fire questions.

"Have you lost consciousness? Have you had any dizziness? Altered vision?"

Amelia pulls a small light from the breast pocket of the lab coat she is still wearing before pointing it in your eyes.

"I'm fine," you close your eyes, instinctively turning away from that blinding light.

"Mm yeah, no. You're not all right. Now be still and stop saying you're fine."

Amelia holds your head still, probing multiple places for some kind of bump and glancing at the gash on your forehead.

"This cut needs stitches and you need a CT scan. Oh and you still haven't answered my questions, don't think I forgot."

When Vic notices that you don't answer, she does it for you.

"When we arrived she was unconscious and was unconscious for about three minutes while we were there and soon after she recovered she had trouble recognizing me so I wouldn't rule out visual changes."

Ladies and gentlemen, the traitorous bastard Victoria Hughes.

"Hospital, now. No discussion. I remind you that between the two of us, I am the doctor and also one of the best."

You sigh, shaking your head a few times or at least trying to, as Amelia holds you firmly in place.

"I don't even think about it Amelia, not-"

You stop suddenly, a high-pitched ringing in your ears not allowing you to hear whatever Amelia is saying and then, your pupils rotate back and your body is suddenly shaken by convulsions and everything goes dark.

....................................................................................................................

It is Amelia who takes you to the hospital, with Warren by your side as they check your vitals all the way to Grey's Sloan while Vic and Travis brush all speed limits in order to get their captain's girlfriend and great friend to the hospital as quickly as possible.

After administering Diazepam, fortunately the seizures have stopped and Amelia is squeezing your hand, as if to let you know she is with you.

"Everything will be fine, stay with me y/n. It's all right okay? It's all right. I'm here, I'm here with you."

In less than five minutes, your unconscious body is quickly brought through the doors of the emergency room at Grey's Sloan.

"Female, 25 years old, car accident. Unconscious for three minutes, probable head injury. She had a seizure episode before entering the ambulance; diazepam was administered. She has been stable ever since."

Vic says, before leaving you in the hands of Dr. Teddy Altman, who rolls her eyes as soon as she recognizes the woman lying on the stretcher.

"Y/n? Do Amelia, Maya, and Carina know?"

The neurosurgeon sighs, shaking her head and slipping on gloves and a sterile gown to carefully examine how severe your head injury is.

"Damn it, Schmitt, call Dr. DeLuca. Warren, alert your captain. I can't believe you guys didn't say anything, those two will kill you."

Warren swallows before nodding and pulling out his phone.

"What was I supposed to do? This idiot didn't want to and I remind you she's a lawyer, she knows her rights very well. We need to do a CT scan on her, Schmitt did you reserve the room?"

"Y-yes Dr. Shepard and Dr. DeLuca is coming. I told her that her partner had been in a car accident but I didn't have time to tell her that she was okay that she had already shut me down."

Teddy pinches her nose between her index finger and thumb, sighing in exasperation.

"Schmitt, did you even check that she wasn't operating?"

The resident looks at her embarrassed before shaking his head.

"No ma'am, I-"

The boy doesn't have time to finish the sentence that a worried Italian doctor enters the emergency room, nearly bursting through the doors.

"Where is she? Is she okay? Teddy tell me she is fine-"

The Italian woman suddenly stops, noticing only then your pale, unconscious body on the crib in front of the two doctors and the resident.

Caria quickly approaches you, stroking your forehead and being careful not to graze the cut before turning to Amelia as they move to the exam room to have you scanned. "What happened?"

Although she is addressing the neurosurgeon, her eyes do not leave your figure, and her hand does not detach from yours.

"She lost control of the car and drove into a light pole, the airbags deployed, which caused her to have a massive nosebleed, and a head injury. She had a seizure episode before we brought her in."

Carina gasps as she hears the last sentence.

"Has she woken up since then?"

"No."

The Italian closes her eyes, aware that this is not a good sign and praying that you have not suffered more damage than she initially expected.

As they prepare you for the CT scan, Amelia and Carina being the only ones in the room, Carina decides to ask Amelia one of the questions that came to her mind as soon as she noticed the neurosurgeon standing next to you, slightly sweaty in the face and aware of all the information from your journey from the accident site to the hospital.

"Why were you with her in the ambulance?"

"She called me; she was afraid you would be upset about the car and didn't even want to go to the hospital. She said she would report us if we took her, I doubt she would have done that and I would have done it anyway but you know, Vic and Warren weren't too keen on taking the risk. And then he called me so that they wouldn't take her to the hospital and they wouldn't call you or Maya."

Carina shakes her head as she and Amelia tuck you inside the machine, before exiting the room.

"You idiot, I don't care about the car. All I care about is that she's okay."

"I know Carina, I tried to reason with her and then...well, she had the fit. It will be fine Carina, she is a fighter. She will come back to you. She loves you too much to leave you."

Carina nods, chasing back tears as she looks at the monitors in front of her, waiting for the results of your CT scan.

The Italian gasps as she feels two powerful arms embrace her and hold her close.

"It will be okay love, Warren told me what happened. She will be fine, otherwise how could we give her a good telling off for how much she was considered?"

Maya kisses her wife's shoulder, also looking at the monitors despite not understanding anything written on them. They both sigh, looking at Amelia waiting for good news.

...........................................................................................

When you open your eyes, for the second time that day, you realize you've fucked up again. The cold white walls of the hospital room you are in are proof of that. You try to move your head to the side, to look around, but a twinge in your neck puts you off. You recognize Maya's warm grip in your right hand and the Italian's wavy hair caressing your stomach as the latter sleeps peacefully.

You give the fireman's hand a squeeze and a gentle caress to the Italian's face. Carina wakes up, crinkling her eyes and looking at you surprised, happy and worried at the same time.

"Bella, how are you feeling? Are you okay? I'll call Amelia..."

Carina speaks frantically, not even realizing she is speaking in Italian, and as she reaches toward the button to call the nurses, to the right of your bed, you fuss her wrist, turning a smile to her.

"I'm fine and before you call anyone else I...I have to tell you how sorry I am Carina. I'm so fucking sorry. I know how much you cared about that car and I'm so sorry, I wanted to try to fix it before you knew it...although I don't know if it can be fixed and-"

Carina hears the beeping sound getting louder and louder; she turns to the monitors and when she sees how fast you are breathing and your heart rate, she knows you are having a panic attack.

"Bella, love, it's okay. It's okay love, I'm not mad. I don't care about a stupid car, Andrea will always stay in my heart; I care about you, Bella. The car will buy back but you worth more than anything, do you understand?"

You keep breathing fast; the throbbing pain in your head does not allow you to think clearly, and unfortunately, Carina's words come to you so muffled that they have no effect on you.

The chaos around you makes Maya suddenly wake up; it takes the blond firefighter a few seconds to figure out what is going on and to join his wife in trying to drag you out of the panic attack.

The blond climbs onto the bed, sitting right behind you and holding you in her arms despite you trying with all your might to free yourself. Carina, on the other hand, kneels in front of you, taking your hands in her own.

"It's okay love, it's okay. Breathe, listen to my heartbeat" Maya whispers in your ear, leaving a kiss on your cheek.

"Follow my breath Bella; that's it, good, keep it up."

In less than ten minutes, the incessant sound that resonated in the hospital room is replaced by a soft, steady BIP. Your chest hurts and you rub it hard, to ease your pain, before a hand forces you to stop.

"Hey, hey, you're going to hurt yourself if you keep this up. Do you want me to call a nurse to give you something?"

You nod, closing your eyes and waiting for the nurse to arrive. Carina reaches out to press the button before immediately returning to hold your hands. Maya continues to leave kisses on your neck and face as you continue to keep your eyes closed.

Contrary to what you expected, it is not a nurse who enters the room but Amelia.

"Hey rock star, you're awake. What's wrong? Do you have a headache? Dizziness?"

You nod, opening your eyes and looking into her eyes. A small smile ripples your lips as your best friend walks over to your bed and hugs you.

"You had me worried idiot."

The neurosurgeon pulls away from the hug before giving you a weak punch on your right arm.

"I'm sorry."

Amelia shakes her head as she sticks something into your IV.

"This is a painkiller, not too strong but it should ease your pain. Call me if there is any problem. I'll be back later to check how your head is; I know you have a hard head but it's always best to be cautious."

Before you can even insult her for the joke she just made, Amelia sneers her way out of the room.

"What an idiot," you shake your head, rolling your eyes. Your body begins to relax as the medication kicks in.

"So will you tell us why you didn't go to the hospital right away? You know how dangerous a head injury can be and you still decided to not go to the hospital right away. It was stupid and reckless and you can't, you CANNOT do that with your health. Ever again."

Maya looks at you sternly, with her ‘’Captain's look’’, as you and Carina call it.

"I'm sorry Maya, I know you are angry and I understand why but my only thought was only the car and the fact that I had destroyed one of the things Andrew had given Carina."

Maya holds you close and Carina joins your embrace.

"No physical thing or not, none, will ever be worth as much as your life y/n. And don't ever have a seizure over it again, am I clear? A car will never be worth as much as you are to you and me, ever. I don't care if I have to throw it away, I don't care if I have to buy another one. I care about you and your health so don't ever pull that crap again because if you had the crisis while you were alone, at home, after getting dropped off there, then it could have ended really badly and I, we, need you to understand that Bella."

Carina strokes your face gently; some tears line her face and you promptly wipe them away. Maya leaves a kiss on your cheek, holding you close.

"Car is right love, you really scared us today and when I think about the fact that we could have lost you I..." Maya shakes her head, her voice breaking and you turn to her, pulling her into a kiss.

"I'm sorry Maya, I'm so sorry I...I won't do it again."

You hug and hold each other tightly, you know you fucked up but now that Carina has calmed you down the relief you feel is priceless; therefore, you enjoy the embrace and that warmth you love so much as the medication slips you back into sleep.

Thank you so much for reading! Sorry, I know it is not the best so excuse me… I will try to improve. Have a great day!

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Taglist: @mmmmokdok @blackhill2245 @melatonindaydreamz @foggytidalwavefun @sevnheaven @budoxinha @gayshyandreadytocry @lighthousekiller @m456300 @blitzar-3 @in-love-with-heda @idontknownemore @lesbianbabe @speedup500 @differentranchempathfestival @mebeingthatbitch @jemilyswife @yuleni18 @darkstar225 @whyamihere2673 @your-my-mission @finca-lotr @coollemonsaresour @nuianced-tck-enby @fishlikestuff @ktstwice @idontknowhowtogay @liladoesfanfics @maria-403 @kawaiitoga @razorscooteer

[weathertheraine]

keep me intact - chapter 13

Chapter summary:

In pieces, it comes back to him. His aching legs remember sprinting up and down that awful grassy hill with his lungs burning. His palms smart, recalling the slap of countless blocks; his head pounds as if it’s stored up all the heat from the past week and locked it away, building a miniature sun in the space where his brain ought to be. The skin of his shoulders and neckline feels clammy and hot - burned, no doubt, and still mockingly oily with residual sunblock.

He remembers Tadashi.

Fic Tags:

Tsukkiyama / Slow Burn / Childhood Friends / Canon compliant (mostly) / t4t (trans boy Tsukishima and trans boy Yamaguchi) / Kei POV

Read chapter 13

Read full fic

[thebearer]

love me tomorrow |carmen berzatto x reader| part three

prompt: after time apart, you and carmen meet up for the first time since the fight.

or part three and the final part of the devastation fic (spoiler- the resolution haha). part one and part two can be found here :)

contains: angst. hurt with comfort (finally lol). mentions of mean!carmen, past fighting. past trauma, family trauma. carmen's been to therapy (yay). language. mom!reader x dad!carmen. fluff at the end, i had to make it a little funny and end on a light note bc it felt so heavy lol. word count- 4.7k+

“He’s here,” Sugar announced, the chime of a doorbell following nearly cinematically. 

Your shoulders tightened, stomach twisting with an ache of nerves you tried to swallow. You were so nervous- why were you so nervous? He’d fucked up, not you. He was here to grovel and beg for forgiveness, not you. Still, you felt your hairline prick with heat, hands clammy when you heard the door opening downstairs. 

“Okay,” You tried to steady your voice, exhaling slowly out of your nose. “I’m almost done.” 

Sugar nodded, not leaving, keeping her post behind you. “You know you don’t have to do this.” Sugar looked at you through the mirror, arms folded over her chest, watching you carefully for a sign- anything that would give her a red flag, make her call this off. 

“I know,” You swallowed your buzzing nerves, jittery in the pit of your belly. 

“I’ll tell him to go away. You give me the word, and I’ll kick him out.” Sugar stood, pushing off the door frame and walking towards you. “Seriously. One wrong word, wrong look, anything, he’s gone. Say the word.” 

You gave a small smile. “I think I’ll be alright, but thank you.” You muttered, looking down at your bare ring finger. You still found yourself reaching for your ring, heart spiking in a panic when you’d see it was gone, only to sink when you remembered why- why you left it. 

“I feel like it’s time.” You admitted, trying to convince yourself more than Natalie. You were still unsure, so jarred and hurt by the last time you’d spoken to Carmen. The things he’d said, how he’d hurt you. “I think we have to figure something out.”

“You don’t have to do anything.” Sugar gave you a pointed look. “Trust me, if this was me, Pete would never live that down- never. He’d be at my mercy for the rest of his life, if I even let him back into it.” 

You knew Natalie wasn’t joking, that she would do just as she said, but that was also easy for her to say; when Pete could not fathom ever thinking those things about her, let alone saying them to her. Sometimes you wished Carmen could be softer, a little more like Pete in that way. 

“He’s been going to therapy,” Richie’s voice played in your mind. “He’s, uh, he’s doin’ good. Tryna get better for you, for both of you. He loves you, you know that, sweetheart. He’s just… He’s fucked up, y’know? We all are a little, but he’s workin’ on it.” 

You hoped that was true. For your marriage, for your baby. Sugar and Pete had been taking Teddy to see Carmen. You couldn't bring yourself to see him yet, but depriving him of Teddy felt cruel and inhumane. 

Downstairs, you could hear her gurgling, Carmen’s soft tone greeting her in hushed excitement. It soothed you, even for just a moment, it felt familiar- felt like home. What you’d missed so badly, what you longed for to have again. 

“Uncle Carm, why haven’t you been staying here too?” MJ’s tiny squeak of a voice rang up the stairs, greeting you as you quietly crept down them. 

“MJ,” Pete muttered, shaking his head gently. “C’mon, bud, you know Uncle Carm’s been on a business trip.” 

“Right, yeah.” Carmen nodded, his hand patting Teddy’s back gently, soothing her and him. Just feeling the weight of her back on his chest, it put him at ease. She was bigger now, longer than he remembered, but he tried not to think about that, nose pressing into her soft tufts of hair. 

MJ saw you first, his face falling into a pout. “Aw, does that mean you’re going home?” He whined, looking at you then back at Carmen. “Are you takin’ Anchovy and Teddy?” 

Anchovy skittered towards you, running up the stairs at the mention of his name. He’d been a trooper with MJ and Maggie, both kids enamored with the cat who was less than impressed with them. 

Carmen stiffened at the sight of you, spine rigid, heart skipping and falling in his chest. There was a pause of awkward uncertainty, neither of you sure what to say. “If you’re good,” Sugar stepped in. “Maybe your aunt and uncle will let you play with them a little longer while they go out.” She looked at you, shrugging gently at the suggestion. 

You looked at Carmen, eyes meeting him in a brief, unsure gaze, before nodding. “Yeah, that would be- that would be great, MJ.” You gave a soft smile to the boy. 

Carmen stood, passing Teddy off to Sugar with a quiet muttering of thanks. He met you in the doorway, hand reaching for yours, but stopping himself, pulling back hesitantly. Instead, he held the door open, letting you pass by him first. 

The car smelled like a mix of cleaning supply, masked with car fresheners he’d stuck in the vents. He’d been smoking, more than usual, you were sure of it. He’d gotten down to one a day after Teddy was born, paranoid that he’d give her asthma or a rash or something worse. 

“Um,” Carmen hesitated, his voice shaking in a way that he hadn’t since your first date. “I was… I was thinkin’ we could go somewhere t-to talk?” Carmen’s gaze met yours, lips pressing together, swallowing around the lump in his throat. 

You nodded, your hands clasped in your lap, both of you too rigid, too uncomfortable. “Yeah, that’s a good idea.” You looked down at your nails. “We could go get coffee? Go to the one by the restaurant.” 

Carmen’s heart burned with a dull ache. The coffee shop a block from The Bear had been a staple in your relationship. When you’d first moved in together, to the shitty downtown apartment to be closer to the restaurant, Carmen would go every Sunday. Sometimes he’d pick up, other times you’d come with him, sit in the corner seat side by side in a booth- like the couples you used to roll your eyes at, lovesick. 

Someone was already sitting in that booth when you got there, so you settled for a small two seater in the back, secluded and empty. Carmen brought you your coffee without asking, he knew the order by heart now, etched into his mind permanently. 

“Thank you,” You muttered, accepting the paper cup, your eyes not meeting his, but your hands brushing. You didn’t pull away this time. 

Carmen sat across from you, a dread filled silence falling thick between the two of you. His knee bouncing under the table. “I, uh, I wanna talk first if-if that’s good with you.” Carmen’s eyes lifted under his ball cap, pulled low on his head, curls peaking out. 

You nodded, twisting the paper cup around on the table, too nervous to drink it. Carmen took a breath, trying to calm his racing mind. “Take a deep breath before you start. It’s ok to take a second to get your words in order, Carmen. Collect your thoughts.” Dr. Mullins’ words rang through his head. 

“I wanna start by saying that I’m sorry.” Carmen looked at you when he said it, eyes rounding in a pathetically sweet way. “I-I’m sorry and I…I didn’t mean anything I said. I would never- It wasn’t you.” 

You looked down at the table, the familiar heat burning in your nose and throat, a threat of tears already. “Hey,” Carmen said firmly, leaning forward. “C’mon, look at me. Please?” You look at him hesitantly, jaw clenching, trying to keep yourself from crying. 

Carmen held your gaze, his lips pressing together in a tight line to keep his own emotions in. “It wasn’t you.” His gaze was intense but soft all at once, holding yours. “It… It was all me. All of it. I-I was overwhelmed, I was stressed, I fucked up, a-and-” Carmen’s voice cracked, breaking at the end, his hand running over his face to try and calm himself. 

You felt your own eyes well with tears, chin ducking closer into yourself, leaning towards him. You wanted to reach out, to grab his hand that rested on the table, squeeze it in comfort like you always did. Instead, you looked at him, waiting for him to continue. 

“And I shouldn’t have said any of that shit because-because none of it was true.” Carmen continued, his voice strained. 

“So why’d you say it then?” You surprised yourself with the firmness in your tone, edging on a snap. 

Carmen blinked, surprised but not entirely shocked. His knee bounced faster and faster under the table. He took a second, holding his breath before exhaling, trying to keep the growing tightness in his chest to a minimum. 

“I was stressed. I was tired. I-I was overwhelmed, and… and I was an asshole.” Carmen admitted, but you still didn’t seem convinced. You knew him better than anyone, better than Dr. Mullins, better than even Fak or Richie or Sugar. 

“I… I was hurting. I was hurting an-and I was so fuckin’ angry. I don’t-I don’t even know why I was so angry.” Carmen admitted, nodding slowly, eyes flickering from your gaze to his hands nervously. “I just… I think I wanted someone to hurt like I was hurting. I just, I don’t know, I wanted someone else to feel like I was, an-and I should have- it was fuckin’ stupid, an-and selfish, and…” 

Your eyes were glassy with tears you tried to hide, blinking a tear that fell down your cheek, wiping it quickly. Carmen’s chest ached, burned with hurt at the sight of you. 

“And I’ve never regretted anything more in my life.” He looked at you sincerely. “I-I-I never said anything more untrue and fuckin’ stupid in my life.” 

“You…” You took a breath, your voice shaking with emotions. “You really hurt my feelings, Carmen.” You admitted looking at him. He nodded, jaw flexing, neck blossoming with splotches of emotion. 

“I just don’t really understand how-how you didn’t mean to say those things. I mean, clearly you-you’ve thought that before.” Your voice lifted higher and higher, climbing with a cry that threatened to break. “I know you’re saying you didn’t mean those things, and I get that, but my problem is you’ve thought them before-” 

“-No, no, I swear-” 

“-You have, Carmen. Clearly you have. You wouldn’t- You didn’t just come up with that shit out of nowhere.” Your voice was beginning to climb, trying to level it out in the cafe, keeping your composure. You took a breath, pinching the bridge of your nose, pad of your thumb swiping the corner of your eye to catch a stray tear. “Just… Just don’t lie to me.” 

Carmen pressed his hands together, trying hard to remember his breathing while his mind was racing. Sugar was right, it was uncomfortable, worse than he could have imagined. 

“You’re right,” Carmen admitted with a nod. There was no point in lying, not to you, you always knew better, knew him better. “I-I did, but not-not like that. Not,” Carmen’s breath hitched, chest tight with a wave of anxiety. 

“You know wh-when I was at the restaurant, and I… I would be ready to rip my fuckin’ hair out. Everything was just goin’ to shit, o-or we’d realize there was a critic on the books, or I’d forgot to order some shit, I’d be going fuckin’ crazy, ya know?” Carmen rambled, words spilling out in tumbles of jumbled truth.

 “I’d go to my office for a second, just to-just to take a fuckin’ breath, and… and I’d check my phone and I’d see a text from you.” His heart swelled at the memory. You’d text him updates through the day, knowing he’d seen him when he could. Baby Teddy in her crib, Anchovy in the bassinet, her outfit for the day, nap time- all the moments he missed at work because you wanted him to see. You had considered him. Carmen missed it more than words could describe the past days, checking his phone out of habit, hoping to see a little OOTD with a smiley face and a wrinkly baby Teddy attached- instead, he saw nothing. 

“I’d just… I don’t know. I was sittin’ there, just fuckin’ stressed o-or angry, and then I’d see that and I-I’d feel,” Carmen paused. Gather your thoughts, gather your thoughts. 

“I felt… I just felt weird about it?” Carmen’s brows pinched together, looking at you for help, unsure. Your face fell, his heart lurching with fear. 

“No, no, no, no. Not-Not like that. I- fuck, that’s not what- I love the pictures. Love them. I-I- They’re the only things that get me through the day, it-it’s not that-” Carmen stuttered out, head dropping into his hands in defeat. Way to go, Berzatto. 

“Felt weird?” You repeated, calm, your way of soothing him. Keeping your voice even, steady without any tones he could read into and spiral. It was second nature at this point. “Weird how?” 

“It made me feel like… like I was, I was missin’ out.” Carmen admitted, eyes shining bright and a little wide like they always did when he’d finally admit something. Wide eyed, scared, almost, like he shouldn’t have told the truth. 

“I felt like, I’m at work, an-and you were at home with Teddy, and…and I felt like I was bein’ a shitty dad. Like I was there too much, an-and I’d miss out on her, and then I’d miss you, I’d just…” Carmen threw his hands out lightly, cheeks puffing with a slow, shaky exhale. 

“I was jealous, maybe? Ma-Maybe that’s the word, but I just… I didn’t want to be there, and I know,” He lifted his voice before you could begin to speak. “I know I’m th-the boss, and-and I get that. And it’s not- it’s not your fault. It’s not your fault you’re home- I’m glad you’re home, I am, because you’re doin’ so much. You are, an-and I know that, I know. You’re-You’re doin’ the most important job in the fuckin’ world, I mean, you’re keepin’ ou-our baby alive.” 

Carmen laughed humorlessly, a scoff that turned into a sniffle, shaking his head. You sat quietly, listening to his words, taking them in with a slow nod. Carmen looked at you, trying to read you, taking in your expressions. Your shoulders less tense, tired, face neutral but he saw the way your lips twitched, holding back a cry. 

“Just sometimes when-when I’d be in the shit, I’d just want to be home.” Carmen admitted. “I’d want to be home, but… but I knew I couldn’t be. I knew I had to-to take care of things, take care of you an-and Teddy, and I don’t- fuck, I don’t mean it like a bad thing. I like doing it, I mean obviously I fuckin’ do, it’s just- it-it’s a lot sometimes and I get-” 

“-Carm,” You cut off his ramblings, reaching across the table, your hand sliding over the top of his, squeezing it gently. 

Carmen thought his lungs might have given out, his heart too, looking down at your hand in awe. Bolts of electricity shot through his body, tingling at his skin that touched yours with excitement. He’d missed this, missed your touch, missed you. It felt surreal, sitting here, feeling you, seeing you. 

“I’m sorry.” Carmen whispered, turning his hand to hold yours. Hands clammy, fingernails bitten to the quick. His fingers intertwined in yours, holding your hand so tightly your fingers tingles. He held your hand like he was scared to let go, like if he did he might never get to hold your hand again. 

“I’m sorry. It-It wasn’t fair. It..It’s not fair.” Carmen squeezed your hand, shaking his head lightly. “You didn’t… I don’t know how to say how much you mean to me.” Carmen looked at you, eyes glassy, red rimmed with tears that gathered at his water line. 

“I, uh, I-I tried to- Well, Richie’s thera- my therapist told me to, uh, to try an-and write out what I wanted to say to you. Take time and reflect and give it to you, but I, uh, I was up all night because I kept starting over.” Carmen rambled on. 

“Everything I was tryna write it just… it didn’t feel like enough. It didn’t do you justice.” Carmen looked up at you, thumb brushing over your knuckle gently. “I felt like it just wasn’t enough. They’re aren’t any words to describe you. To…To describe what you mean to me, an-and how much I love you.” 

You swallowed back a sob, looking into his eyes. An intensity you hadn’t seen since he said his vows, maybe more now. “I-I love you so much, and… and I don’t deserve you. I don’t fucking deserve you.” Carmen choked out, a sob slipping out between his confessions. 

“I-I’m a fuckin’ loser, an-and a psycho, and I-I’m a shitty dad and husband…And I-I’m fucked up, and you-you chose to love me anyways. An-And to marry me, and have a kid with me- start a family with me. And what do I do? I fuck it up, and I don’t deserve you. I never have, an-and I never will.” Carmen rambled, tears sliding down his cheeks freely, leaning towards you, shoulders stuttering with a choking of tears.

“Don’t say that.” You sniffle, shaking your head. “Don’t say that-” 

“-No, it’s true, it’s fuckin’ true-” 

“-No, it isn’t. Carmen, don’t say that.” You reach your free hand out, cupping his cheek across the table, thumb swiping over his cheek, wiping away a stray tear. You held him, feeling the heat in his cheeks, he turned into your touch, breath slowing. 

“You’re not a loser. You’re not a psycho. You’re not a bad dad, or-or a bad husband either.” You leaned forwards, closing in the gap between the two of you, the edge of the table digging into your stomach. “You made a mistake-” 

“-No, that’s-that’s- it’s worse than that. It’s so much fuckin’ worse than that. Don’t-” 

“-You made a mistake.” You said, firmer this time, cradling his cheek in your hand. 

Carmen took a breath, squeezing your hand in his, sniffing deep to keep his tears in. “I don’t… I don’t want to be like my parents.” He whispered, eyes rounding in a scared way. “I-I don’t want to fuck up you o-or Teddy or… I just don’t wanna end up like them. I wanna be different.” 

“You’re not gonna end up like them.” You shook your head softly. 

“No, I-I was actin’ just like them.” Carmen muttered. “Yellin’ at you a-and actin’ like a complete fuckin’ lunatic. Just like them, an-and I don’t wanna live like that.” 

“You won’t.” You reassured him gently, whispering across the table. He shook his head in protest. “Carm, listen to me. You’re… You’re not like them, ok?” 

You could feel Carmen start to shake, a trembling through his system that was a tell-tale sign of a panic attack. Your eyes scanned over the restaurant, filling up with the mid-afternoon rush. “Come on,” You nodded towards the door, pushing your chair back, hand still in his. “Let’s get some air.” 

Carmen didn’t argue, he wouldn’t- couldn’t even if he wanted to. Your hand in his, squeezing his gently, pulling him towards the car. Carmen pulled the keys out with shaky hands, unlocking the door. He reached for the passenger door, but you pulled the back door open instead, surprising him when you slipped in the backseat, nodding at him to follow you. You squeezed into the middle, Teddy’s car seat pressed to your back, Carmen pressed into your side, shutting the door.

“You’re not like them.” You broke the silence, turning yourself towards him. “You’re not.” 

Carmen leaned his head back against the seat, tears leaking out of his eyes. “You-You don’t have to do this, say that.” He shook his head. “I don’t deserve it.” 

“Carmen, you’re not like your parents.” You reached for his hand again. “The fact that you’re scared to be like them, scared and trying to stop it, that shows me you’re not like them.” 

Carmen’s chest stuttered, a hissing of a cry leaving his lungs. “You made a mistake.” You swallowed, your own heart aching. “But… But that doesn’t mean you’re as a whole a bad person. It just means you made a mistake, and if you learn from it and become better, then it’s ok. It’s a lesson learned.” 

Carmen nodded, eyes squeezing shut, tight like he was trying to keep everything in. “I just…I really fucking miss you.” Carmen admitted through a wobbly voice, eyes still closed. “I-I really miss you, and… and I want you to come home.” 

You shook your head, tears sliding down your cheeks. “I miss you too.” You whispered, squeezing his hand. “I missed you so much.” 

Carmen turned, arms wrapping around your body, pulling you tightly into him. His nose pressed into the top of your head, breathing in detergent that didn’t smell like what you used at home, shampoo, too. You held onto him, fingers digging into his shoulders, pushing him further and further into you until it felt like your bodies were meshing together, fusing into one. 

Whispered apologies shared through teary, wet sniffles filled the space. Carmen’s nose rubbing against yours, hesitating before he kissed you. You pulled him into you, finally soothing the aching longing that had built in your chest, your lips catching his, the two of you staying unmoving, wanting to feel the other. Clinging to each other, hands grabbing, lips parting, Carmen pressing you against the car seat, hand cradled on the back of your head. 

“I-I understand if you still don’t wanna come home.” Carmen muttered, breath hot over your cheek, nose rubbing against your skin. “But I really fuckin’ miss you.” 

“I miss you too.” You muttered, lips buzzing against his neck, tears hot and trickling onto the collar of his t-shirt. “I-I want to come home.” 

“A-Are you sure?” Carmen’s eyes lit up with hope, though he tried to hide it, the way he always did; too scared to let him get too excited, too hopeful because he always feared it would end. 

“Yeah,” You whispered, nodding gently, balling the back of his shirt between your fingers. 

“Yeah?” Carmen repeated, lips pressing together to keep his cry in, a different one this time. One of relief. For the first time in days, he felt like he could breathe, like his lungs weren’t constricting and on the brink of collapse. His mind didn’t race and cloud with delirious confusion. No, here and now, holding you, Carmen had clarity. 

The both of you stayed in the back of the car, holding the other, chest to chest until your heartbeat became the same, steady rhythm, matching the others. 

Carmen held your hand on the drive back, pressing wet kisses to your knuckles, trying to wipe his eyes of any tears. “Can’t let Pete see me cryin’ again.” He muttered. “That was a new fuckin’ low.” You had giggled softly, enough to have his heart fluttering. He’d never admit it out loud, not now, anyways, that he was thankful for Pete. How he’d taken care of you, of Teddy, of Anchovy. He’d stuck up for you, even if it was against Carmen, and that meant the world to Carmen. 

Pulling into Sugar and Pete’s house, Carmen shoved the gear shift into park, his hand still in yours, both of you sitting in each other's company for a minute longer. Just a little bit longer the two of you, before you had to face the others. 

“Oh, uh, one more thing.” Carmen’s thumb ran over your knuckles before he let go of your hand for a moment, raising up in the seat to dig into the front pocket of his jeans. 

“I, uh, I brought your rings back.” Carmen’s voice dropped, a shake in his words that matched the shake in his hands, pinching your wedding band and ring in between his fingers. 

You swallowed at the sight, Carmen holding the ring between his fingers, it took you back to years before when he’d proposed. Nearly as nervous as he was now, just as shaky, but for a different reason. 

“You don’t have to put them on or anything. I don’t- I’m not tryna make you do that, it’s your choice, obviously. I just,” Carmen took a breath, looking at you. “I thought you might want them back.” 

You paused for a moment, looking at the rings, the sting of the last time you saw them still burning and aching in your chest, but this time, it wasn’t as crushing. It was more of a dull ache, a tiredness that came with it instead of devastation. 

Reaching out, your fingertips tickled his palms, gathering the two rings in your hand. You looked at them, turning them over in your hands. “Thank you,” You mumbled, looking up at Carmen. He swallowed, giving a nod, trying to mask the hurt that you hadn’t put them back on- you didn’t miss it. 

“Do-” Your voice caught in your throat. “Will you put them back on?” You blinked at him, wide eyed, asking so sweet, Carmen thought his heart might give out entirely. 

You held the rings out towards him. “Will you put them back on for me? Please?” 

Carmen didn’t deserve you. The notion rang loud over and over in his head again, throat burning, welling up with tears. He didn’t deserve you. You were too good, too fuckin’ good for him. 

His hands trembled, holding yours and slipping the rings back onto your ring finger, back to their rightful place. Carmen twisted them, a deep breath of a sob that was threatening to break filling the space. His fingers intertwined with yours, free hand cupping your jaw, pulling you into a kiss over the console. 

Sugar looked out the window, peeking through the blinds. “What’re they doin’ out there?” Pete whispered behind her, like the two of you might hear them. “Do they look happy? Sad? You don’t think it went bad, do you? I mean, Carmen can be-” 

“-Pete,” Sugar snapped with a soft huff. “Look for yourself.” She moved, biting back a small grin. 

Pete slid in her place, pushing the blinds apart, sneakily looking out the side of them. He could see the two of you in the car, Carmen’s hands on the back of your head, holding you while you leaned across the console in a deep, passionate kiss. 

“Well, lookie there.” Pete grinned, letting the blinds fall. “I guess there was a happy ending after all.” 

Sugar rolled her eyes, lips twitching in a small smile. “He still has a lot to make up for. I hope she didn’t let him off the hook too easily.” She grumbled, crossing her arms. “But I am glad they made up. I would kill Carmen if he fucked things up with my favorite sister-in-law.” 

Pete let out a small laugh, looking out the window again. “The kids are gonna miss Teddy and Anchovy when they go back. MJ’s gonna be devastated they’re taking them.” Pete muttered, Sugar nodded. 

Pete paused for a moment, looking behind him with a soft frown. “Y’know, this is gonna sound crazy, Nat, but I’ll be kinda glad when Anchovy is gone.” Pete admitted in a hushed tone, like Anchovy might hear him. 

Sugar snorted lightly. “Yeah. Except MJ and Maggie will be begging for a cat of their own. They’ve already started and I told them-” 

“-No, I mean,” Pete turned, watching the orange cat slink around at the top of the stairs, Anchovy glaring down at Pete before disappearing to the guest room. “I don’t think that cat likes me.”

[hoe4hotchner]

Clung to you | [A.H]

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x gn!Reader CW: Hurt/comfort, mentions of injuries, emotional vulnerability WC: 1.4k

This is part of #Teddy-ber hosted by @angellsell

           The world was chaos, a blur of flashing lights, shouting voices, and gunshots ringing in the distance, but all Hotch could focus on was getting to you. His heart pounded as he sprinted through the darkened warehouse, barking orders into his radio. Still, his thoughts were singular: Find you. Get to you.

           You had gone in alone - forced to act when the unsub took a hostage and disappeared into the depths of the abandoned building. The team had split up, and Hotch had ordered backup to sweep the perimeter, but when the radio went silent for too long, that icy feeling of dread crept up his spine.

           He turned a corner and froze at the sight in front of him. There you were, slumped against the cold concrete wall, your hands bound and blood staining your shirt. His stomach twisted violently at the sight of you, but he couldn’t let the panic take over. You were still alive - he could see the shallow rise and fall of your chest - and that was all that mattered.

           His voice was urgent as he called out your name, he dropped to his knees beside you. His hands were shaking, but he forced himself to stay calm, to focus on freeing you from the restraints.

           Your eyes fluttered open at the sound of his voice, and a weak breath escaped your lips as you registered his presence. “Hotch…” Your voice was barely a whisper, strained with pain, but the relief in your eyes was unmistakable.

           Hotch’s heart broke at the sight of you - so fragile, so vulnerable - but he kept his focus on the task at hand. He pulled out his pocketknife, carefully cutting through the ropes that bound your wrists before gently lowering you into his arms.

           “It’s okay,” he murmured, his voice low and soothing. “I’ve got you. You’re safe now.”

           The words felt hollow in the face of what you’d just endured, but Hotch needed you to hear them, to believe them. You were trembling in his arms, your body shaking from shock and pain, but you clung to him like he was your lifeline.

           You could feel his hands, gentle but firm, as he pulled you closer to him. The warmth of his body was a stark contrast to the cold concrete floor you had been lying on for what felt like hours. You were barely aware of the team arriving, their worries being voiced, of the shouting in the background, because all you could focus on was the way Hotch held you. His strong arms around you, his heartbeat against your ear - it was the only thing that felt real in the haze of fear and pain that clouded your mind.

           “I thought-” You couldn’t finish the sentence, your voice cracking as tears welled up in your eyes. You thought you wouldn’t make it, that you’d never see him again, never feel the safety of his presence. But he was here. He found you. He always did.

           “Shh,” Hotch hushed you softly, pressing his lips to your forehead. “Don’t talk. You’re going to be okay.”

           You buried your face into his chest, clinging to him as though letting go would mean reliving the nightmare all over again. Hotch could feel your hands fisting the fabric of his shirt, and his heart ached for you. He wished he could take all the pain away, and erase every terrible memory of what had happened, but all he could do was hold you.

           The paramedics arrived moments later, trying to assess your injuries, but every time they attempted to move you from Hotch’s arms, your grip tightened. You couldn’t let go - not yet, not until the terror had fully passed.

           “Let me take her,” Hotch said quietly to the paramedics, and though they hesitated, they nodded. He knew how much you needed him right now, how the fear still clung to you like a shadow, and he wasn’t going to leave your side.

           He carried you out of the warehouse, cradling you close to his chest, and you leaned into him, your body weak but your mind still racing with the remnants of fear and adrenaline. He murmured reassurances into your ear, telling you that you were safe, that it was over. You were alive.

           When you finally made it to the ambulance, Hotch gently lowered you onto the stretcher. But as soon as your body touched the cold metal surface, panic surged through you, and your hand shot out to grab his wrist.

           “Don’t leave me,” you whispered, your voice barely audible, but the desperation in your eyes was enough to make Hotch’s chest tighten.

           “I’m not going anywhere,” he said firmly, his hand closing over yours. He climbed into the ambulance with you, settling beside you as the paramedics began working. You never let go of his hand, not even for a second.

           Back at his apartment, after hours of hospital checks and team debriefs, Hotch finally got you settled onto his couch, wrapped in a blanket, you were too scared to stay at your own place. Your injuries weren’t severe - bruises, a few cuts, and a concussion - but the emotional scars ran far deeper than anything physical.

           You hadn’t said much since leaving the hospital, but Hotch could see the fear in your eyes, the way your body still trembled when you thought no one was looking. You were trying to be strong, but Hotch knew you too well. He could see right through the brave face you were putting on.

           You sat quietly on the couch, your eyes fixed on the floor as Hotch brought over a cup of tea. He sat down beside you, close enough that your shoulders were touching, and you immediately leaned into him, seeking out the comfort of his presence.

           For a few minutes, there was nothing but silence. You sipped the tea slowly, but your grip on the mug was tense, and Hotch could feel the weight of everything you weren’t saying, everything you were trying to keep hidden.

           “I’m sorry,” you finally whispered, your voice small, fragile. “I know I should be stronger than this.”

           Hotch frowned, turning to look at you. “You don’t have to apologize,” he said softly. “You went through something traumatic. You’re allowed to feel whatever you’re feeling.”

           You bit your lip, blinking back the tears that threatened to spill. “I just - I can’t stop thinking about it. I can’t shake the fear.”

           Hotch’s heart ached as he watched you struggle with your emotions. He reached out, gently taking the mug from your hands and setting it aside before pulling you into his arms.

           “You don’t have to go through this alone,” he murmured, his hand stroking your hair softly. “I’m here. I’ll always be here. Everyone on the team is there too.”

           You clung to him, burying your face into his chest as the tears finally broke free. The sobs wracked your body, and Hotch held you tighter, letting you cry, letting you release all the fear and pain you had been holding inside. His fingers traced soothing patterns along your back, and he whispered words of comfort, his voice low and steady.

           When the sobs finally subsided, you stayed in his arms, your face still pressed against his chest as you breathed in his familiar scent. The warmth of his embrace, the sound of his heartbeat - it was the only thing that made you feel safe, the only thing that kept the fear at bay.

           “I’m sorry,” you said again, your voice barely above a whisper.

           “Stop apologizing,” Hotch said gently, his fingers brushing a strand of hair from your face. “You’re allowed to need someone.”

           You nodded, but the guilt still gnawed at you. You had always prided yourself on being strong, on handling things on your own, but now you couldn’t even let go of him long enough to breathe without the fear creeping back in.

           “I’m here for as long as you need me,” Hotch said quietly, sensing the turmoil in your mind. “You don’t have to do this alone, but you should try and get some sleep.”

           You looked up at him, your eyes red from crying. You nodded, your hand still gripping his shirt, and Hotch smiled softly, gently helping you down in a laying position before pulling the blanket tighter around you.

[ecstarry]

snippet wednesday - full fic here

“Why do you look so displeased? Crushes are supposed to be fun, Harry.”

“He’s insufferable,” Harry muttered, burying his face in his hands.

Regulus chuckled softly. “I know the type,” he said, remembering all the words that once described his now-beloved husband.

“He’s a smart ass.”

“I believe I was that type,” Regulus quipped, his tone light.

“You actually have something more than that in common with him,” Harry confessed, fidgeting again. “You’re actually kinda... related to him.” His voice grew higher as he finished, cringing at his own words.

“Teddy?”

“Ew! No! He’s like my cousin.”

“Well, the Blacks have a complicated history with—” Regulus cut himself off. “Never mind that… Who is it?”

“Ugh. Please don’t make me say it."

thank you for the lovely tags @honeybcj & @bloodbruise im hugging u <3 i'll keep this as an open tag babes!

[starswhisperwritershear]

Listen...

Rarely ever have I found a ship where there are at least three different main dynamics between the characters and I love all of them. Like, depending on the order of events that people put Danny and Dash through there are many ways they interact.

Situation 1: Dash apologizes and Danny being a good person accepts it and they become friends and then whoopsies, a crush. Love it.

Situation 2: Dash doesn't apologize but tries to be friends anyway and Danny has a lot of anger about that that ends up in a huge angst chapter where they talk it out. Adore it.

Situation 3: Dash gets close to Danny as Phantom first and in turn starts being kinder to Danny and then whoopsies now there are complicated crushes. Give me more of it.

I have read so many fics that follow one of these three patterns (And a few others that don't but I've read so many I can't remember the others rn) and I eat that shit up every time. They're all so good for so many reasons and I think people are really sleeping on these dynamics.

[kentocalls]

laios touden | seven modern!au, established relationship. swf. you're doing your nails and laios is being laios. please get this man out of my head. (pet name : baby)

he stops in his footsteps as he realizes he's been incessantly speaking on the topic of why a highspeed rail would enable real solutions to transit problems without your usual hum or uh huh. you are the most patient listener and he feels tremendously alone in the hallway.

where have you drifted off to?

laios finds himself poking his head through every available doorway. kitchen? spotless, he gets lost in reimagined the meal held hours prior before being reminded, once again, he isn't close to you.

the bathroom is empty, smells vaguely of a grape handwash (purple you claim) he's come to associate with you.

he pads, room to room, so laser focused on finding your bright beaming smile he almost crashes into you, sitting on the ground, concentrating.

nail clippings lay a napkin, he's careful not to accidentally kick it as he ensnares you in a hug. legs caging your form as he stuffs his nose into your collarbone. "careful" you huff, nail paint bottle and brush barely escaping your skin. "baby, ten minutes please."

he groans, squeezes you tighter. mumbling nothings into your neck, his nose tickling, a giggle escapes. "not a baby."

"ooh, okay, my big strong baby." he pulls back to quip about nicknames and what how would you feel about being called his baby. his. baby. he catches himself blushing. oh, he gets it now.

you turn back to your task at hand. painting the delicate color on your finger tips slowly. going slowly means you'll stay inside your nail lines and won't need to shower to wash off the excess nail paint. laios, precious thing, continues to make himself known. "whatcha doing?"

"being fancy." a smile on your lips, laios tries to hold the nail paint bottle for you, ever so ready to help. "nu uh, i still need this." he pouts, arms encasing your waist, making your task infinitely harder.

he watches the gentle strokes of the brush as it lays a pretty color on your nails. admittingly, he hasn't considered the effort it takes, how delicately your hands move. laios wonders if you'd let him paint one, he thinks he would do a good job. but you're too efficient and quick. poking at his hand to hand him the bottle, "can you put this back in the rack please?"

you have a small collection of nail paints, all organized in a neat tray. laios eyes the open spot for the bottle before asking, "can you paint mine too?"

the palm of your hand feels cold as you attempt a comforting gesture, turning as much as you can, fingers still wide, trying to keep them protected from accidental touch. "of course, i just need to dry these a bit more." your lips form an o and you blow so gently, hand moving in opposite direction of your lips and laios feels hot all over.

you're murmuring about this being the time you won't bite your nails. the color is pretty, isn't it? you'll be good and not get nervous and chew on it. but laios is is still looping how close you are, how tenderly you're treating your hands, his hands. how careful your body is draped over him.

you're pouting as you examine his hands. he's not careful, you've known this, but his hands are pretty. strong, calloused in odd places. your touch is so tender, laios feels his ears burn at the close examination. your thumb runs over each of his nails, feeling for a jagged edge, filer ready in your other hand.

he watches your face with a soft smile, you're being so attentive. he twitches not expecting the coolness of the nail pain, you coo at him, aslk "too cold, baby?" in a manner too sweet, trails after the hand that was on his cheek. and you're back to finish his other fingers.

explaining he has to sit still for ten minutes. he only chuckles in response, he can sit like, with you so close, forever. you undermine how content he feels right now. you bring a hand up to inspect the color, blowing lightly at the wet color.

"you have such nice nail beds." you sigh, voice soft and dreamy. laios is wants to kiss you so badly, you wouldn't be upset right? he doesn't need his hands to kiss you. he shuffles closer but a hand to his chest stops him. "be good for me, sit still."

he's frowning. what's a kiss? but you lean in close, so close and all do that voice he's so weak to, honey laced and serious "laios? be good yeah? sit still."

right right right, he can be good. he can be absolutely good. the best. the bestest damn good ever! sits up straighter, determined, you giggle and shuffle out of the cocoon of his body. surprised how easily he gave in.

his eyes rake over you. he's going to kiss you so hard after these ten minutes. he waves his hands in the hair, blows on them to dry faster. gosh! he feels so helpless as he sits on the ground, hands up as if he's done something wrong, robbed a bank or pushed a child but when he's the victim here! how dare you leave without kissing him, steal all the warmth!

he tries to count the seconds in his head, converts them to minutes and is all but near five hundred and fifty five seconds before he hears a clash from the kitchen. oh no, oh no did he leave the jam jar on the top shelf again? you know better than to tip-toe to grab at it. he's on his feet and moving, breath held tight when he's greeted with a "laios touden!"

he forgets how to speak, you look so pretty. standing in the green kitchen, wooden spatula in one hand, the other on your hip, brows furrowed at the tall man. oh, you're mad-mad at him, and it's probably his fault he's sure, but all of your attention is on him, finally.

greedily he gets closer, stupidly he reaches out as you swat a hand away. the spatula points to the right, perfectly timed meow and your fingers look so pretty gripping that spatula. laios will kiss each one happily--

"we aren't allowed to take another one in." the black cat now brushes against laios leg, supporting the blond as he pulls you close to him. your resolve to stay mad faltering. "my baby," he emphasis, lips getting pouty "winter was waiting for me on a train boxset. it was a sign from the universe, i couldn't say no."

but you can, after you escape the warmth of his hold, why is he so tall and strong. his hold is firm and resolute, "no, no, no i'm not listening this time. we already have three, laios!"

"you know how i feel about odd numbers." you do, of course you do.

"and you prefer prime numbers, three is good laios. including us that's five inhabitants, another perfect prime number. winter would make six. it's an even number but not a prime number. we already have the per- " the black cat brushes against you, you look down at the beautiful abyss of darkness "no."

you jump at another clash, laios' arms instantly tighten around you but he doesn't seem perplexed. he's trying to distract you with kisses and warm touches. that noise? that came from the bathroom this time didn't it?

your eyes scan the room, melon, cantaloupe and honey look back at you with lazy ease. only winter seems adamant about staying near you and invading your space, meowing, begging for pets and kisses.

if that accounts for all the cats you can see…laios starts to pepper you with kisses. "baby, my baby, listen, you know what my favorite number is? and what's also prime? seven is--" a tortoise cat zips into the kitchen and immediacy back out to the bathroom.

is it bad he finds the way you yell his full name kinda hot?

[soaps-mohawk]

Building off of the anon who said Simon has beef with Omega's bear; I saw that and immediately imagined those TikToks where the boyfriends wait for their partners to leave the room so they can punch their Squishmallows and other stuffed animals. Imagine Simon just *throttling* the bear for the hell of it and Omega catches him and bans him from her nest for a week for bullying her bear 😭

Definitely happens when he's just chilling in her nest and the bear is just sitting there staring at him with those beady eyes wearing his shirt.

Gets up to berate it and things get heated and the reader walks out of the bathroom and sees him throttling it. Gets all upset about her precious ghost bear and how it didn't do anything to him and boots him out of the nest 🤣

Goes pouting to Johnny and Johnny's just like..."You beat up an innocent teddy bear? You deserve it." 😂

[princessfbi]

“What was that noise?” + polyfire

You should know in true us fashion I had a smutty idea and a whumpy idea for this one. Today smutty wins.

“What was that noise?”

Heat burned into Buck’s cheeks as he stared up at them. The humiliation started slow, spreading down his throat into his chest and up to the top of his head as he clamped his teeth down onto his lip. His body was slick with sweat and spit and blazing from the inside out but Tommy and Eddie were staring down at him like he was a wonder.

Their twinned stunned expressions morphed through a kaleidoscope of emotions and Buck could only hold his breath and wait. Wait for them to decide if they would spare him some dignity and pretend they hadn’t heard it. Or—

Tommy pinned down Buck’s wrists and Buck keened beneath the pressure. His back bowed off the bed as the inferno inside his veins surged and Buck keened. A mewling, pathetic sound that was the definition of desperate and not at all sexy but god he couldn’t help it.

Tommy eased his grip but didn’t let go. He got it first because of course he did. They’d been dating long enough to know each other’s in and outs but they hadn’t had a chance to explore… this. Not before they realized that every night they spent with Eddie just added more fuel for their desire to have him too. Even then, Tommy had always been gentle. A tender, world shattering mind blowing gentleness that made Buck nearly sob with how cared for he felt. No one had ever held him the way Tommy did. Like he was something to be cared for. Like he was something that could shatter and that was the last thing in the world Tommy wanted. Like he was to be treasured and loved.

It was a gentleness that swept into their new dynamic with Eddie. It started as carefulness, a considerate but curious hand that traveled along Buck’s body as Eddie explored. There had been a wonder too. Like Eddie didn’t think he’d ever get the chance to run his fingertips along Buck’s ribcage, taste his lips, feel the way Buck unraveled beneath his attention. Gentleness was at the very heart of Eddie’s nature and Buck didn’t know how he’d been so lucky to somehow be wanted by the two most gentle people in all the world.

Most days he felt unworthy of them. Those same days, however, they spent hours trying to change his mind.

“Oh,” Tommy said, his brow furrowed in concentration and Buck tried hide his face in his bicep before he imploded with embarrassment. Tommy squeezed his wrists again and Buck squeaked as he blinked up at them. “There it is.”

Eddie looked back down at him with an almost frown marring his expression before his eyes drifted to Tommy’s hands and then Tommy.

When he looked back down at Buck again, his eyes were smoldering.

“You like that?” Eddie asked, so very much the opposite of gentle hands grabbing onto his hips and forcing his legs even wider.

Buck stuttered out as gasp as he slid across the mattress, a pressure building in his shoulders as Tommy kept him pinned in place by his hands. The barest hint of Eddie’s nails scraped up the soft parts of his thighs and Buck trembled all over as he tried to close his legs. But Eddie was fitted in between them, holding them open and leaving Buck exposed.

“Is there something you’ve been wanting to ask us for, sweetheart?” Eddie asked, his voice dark and teasing as those nails dragged up his stomach and chest before sliding up to his throat.

He didn’t squeeze. But the weight was there. A promise.

Buck shivered.

“You want us to be a little mean to you?” Tommy asked.

Yes. Yes yes yesyesyesyes!

Buck didn’t know how much he wanted that until that very moment but he wanted. He wanted it so badly he thought he would die without it.

It wasn’t his first time being adventurous in the bed. But it was the first time it was with two partners that could throw him around like he weighed nothing at all. Buck wanted it. Wanted to be like a rag doll between the two people who made him feel nothing but safe for his every breath.

Tommy yanked Buck’s hands further above his head as Eddie dragged his nails over the pebbling nubs of his nipples. White hot pain laced with the burning pleasure churning deep in his belly. It stole his vision away as Buck squirmed. He whined high and thin as he tried to get some more.

“Use your words, baby boy.”

That. That wasn’t something Buck knew would alight the already burning inferno inside him.

“Oh,” Eddie practically purred as he swept his thumb over Buck’s lips. “He liked that one.”

The heat in Buck’s face soared down his throat into his chest as he squeezed his eyes shut. Sparked dashed across his eyelids as he tried to will the racing of his heart down but it was no use. Not when the gentle fingertips from before were slowly but surely turning deliciously bruising.

“P-Please…” He breathed.

“Listen how pretty he begs.” Eddie praised and it washed through Buck like a wave that stole all the air from his lungs.

“I bet we could find some more noises,” Tommy said, his smile wicked and beautiful.

“If we work together,” Eddie said and Buck only barely opened his eyes to see Eddie surge forward to capture Tommy’s lips with his own.

[kiddbegins]

Couch - A. Hotchner

Aaron hotchner x fem!reader

You weren’t always comfortable around Aaron hotchner. It was impossible to be right away. Stoic new boss that never looked at anyone in anyway other than with daggers for eyes.

He intimidated you from day 1. It took a good handful of cases before you were used to the gore of the job and he seemed to notice when it got to you.

That led to him making sure you were okay, which opened up that line of communication. You knew you could go to him. That he was there.

Not that you never thought that. He was your boss of course. A well respected and known fbi agent. You’d seen him in the news plenty of times before you’d met him face to face.

Regardless of how things started, now, a handful of years later, you were close. Things were shaky for his home life and you were a shining star in the sky that kept him sane.

Though he’d never admit that to you.

In the same sense, he was that for you. This last case back in Connecticut was hard. Hit home. You’d almost lost the team all at once. It wasn’t easy.

And since then, sleeping wasn’t either. The few hours of sleep were met with reliving that exact moment, waking up right after your eyes fell to the fact nobody had gotten out.

So you just stayed awake. It wasn’t necessarily on purpose but if you could, you’d find an excuse to do it. Even if it meant that the following morning you’d be leaning on your palm on your desk fighting to keep your eyes open.

It wasn’t unnoticed. By anyone. Though nobody wanted to bring it up. Just like former problems, they figured it was something you’d work through on your own. It worked for Reid, it should work for you too. Should.

Except it didn’t, and not even a week later and a good deal of hours under-slept, Hotch was calling you into his office. How could you possibly do your job if the bags under your eyes were dark enough to match his suit?

He didn’t accept the usual argument of you being fine, he never did. “Seriously, Hotch, I’ll get over it-“ he held his hand up, standing.

“You’re taking a nap.” His voice firm, not allowing an argument. Sure it was unprofessional, but he knew you wouldn’t go home and even if you would, that didn’t mean you’d sleep.

The only way he could be sure you at least tried, was in the same room as him. And since they weren’t out on a case, looking to share a hotel room, his office’s couch would do.

“What?”

He gestured to the couch, moving the small red pillow from the middle of the cushions to the end and patted it, “lay down.”

Once again, no argument allowed. When you did, he shrugged his jacket off, putting it over you like a blanket.

“Hotch-“

“Sh,” a finger held up to his lips. “Try and sleep. I’m going back to do work.” And he did. As if you weren’t laying there, confused and staring at the front of his desk.

It took awhile, his pen scribbling across paper and those papers then turning the only sound aside from both of your breathing that you could hear.

Eventually though, you did fall asleep. Surprising to you, nothing woke you up until you nearly rolled off the couch and scared yourself awake.

Hotch was still at his desk but the lights were out, his lamp shining some of it onto his face.

Slowly you stretched, looking over, catching his eye as he did the same. “Morning.” He said, checking the time with a slight chuckle, one you’d hardly heard.

It was actually almost 8 and he was reading over a report for the third time in an attempt to let you rest the best you could.

“Mhm,” you were too tired to make words come out of your mouth as you stood, his jacket slipping before you caught it. “You shoulda w’ke me up before.” Your words muttered together.

“You needed rest.”

“On your couch specifically?”

“Would you have got it at home?”

“…no.”

Hotch gave you a slight smile, “there’s your answer.” He held his hand out for his jacket, placing it on his desk when you reached and handed it over.

“Thank you.” You muttered quietly, fiddling with your fingernails nervously.

“Don’t thank me.” He softly spoke, an aura entrapping the two of you.

That became a bit of a thing between you. The naps weren’t terribly frequent, but enough that you could pin the connection between them. He made you feel safe. A reminder that he was there.

At home, it was silent, too many things could run through your mind. But in his office, he was right there. Writing, typing, quietly talking on the phone, existing right in your face.

You’d woken the other day to him softly telling Jack goodnight and it made your heart just about burst right then and there. You waited a decent while before actually sitting up and alerting him of your actual presence.

There was even a point he left you to sleep in the office and nothing. No dice. You couldn’t sleep a wink. He came back in and you were out in the next five minutes.

Something about Aaron hotchner was just so simply comforting and your body craved his presence.

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tags: @luvonstyles @doctorreid187 @its-just-me-chey @oliviabbb @lillisummers @zzagataa @alexxavicry @felix-fan @thestarrynightslover @hiireadstuff