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im-robins-bitch · 1 year ago

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A Somewhat SFW Alphabet with Robin Buckley

18+ only please.

A - Activities (what does she like to do with you?)

Anything. Robin Buckley will do anything with you and have the time of her life.

She does have a special place in her heart for fall/winter activities. You’ll go to the pumpkin patch to pick out the perfect pumpkins and then carve them to put on the porch.

I honestly think you would be the kind of couple where you compete against each other to make the best gingerbread house and it gets more and more out of hand each year until the store-bought kits aren’t enough anymore and you’re baking gingerbread at home and have pre-planned floor plans. There may be a ceasefire one year where you both collaborate to make your dream home out of gingerbread.

She will do anything you want, but come the colder months, she already has your calendar marked up with must-do activities.

B - Beauty ( What does she love most about herself?)

Besides her brain (which she sometimes thinks works against her) Robin thinks one of her best features is her eyes. Since dating you she’s come to think of her fingers as the second best.

You love, love, love her freckles. You like to count them and kiss them until she’s giggling and pushing you away. Her hands are top-tier as well, she always has them on you. If she’s trying to learn the fingering for a new song on trumpet you can bet your ass she’s pressing them down on your thigh to get some practice in.

C - Comfort (How does she comfort you, what kind of comfort does she seek from you?)

When Robin is overwhelmed, the only thing she wants is to feel you lying on top of her. She likes feeling your weight press down on her. She’ll curl her fingers around your wrist so she can feel your pulse. If it’s really bad you’ll lay in silence until she’s asleep, snoring in your ear. If it’s just a minor upset, you’ll encourage her to talk about what’s bothering her and play some bowie softly in the background.

If you’re feeling down she will do anything you need, anything you ask.

She’ll hold you all night, stroking your back and kissing your head. She’ll try her best to be quiet, but she’ll usually start talking by accident and that is usually what ends up working the best. You’re also a big believer in naked cuddling, Robin’s boobs are the best stress reliever.

“You know cats have been known to stroke their owners because they think it will make them feel better” Robin has been staring unabashedly at your hands the entire time you’ve been doing your night-time routine.

“Really?”

“According to a study, it also promotes bonding- Wh- why are you taking your shirt off?”

“I’m gonna come lie on you, c’mon Buckley get your shirt off we have a bond to improve”

D - Date (What is Robin’s favourite kind of date)

Her favourite special dates are the days when you’ll go drive over to Indianapolis and spend the whole day there.

Sometimes you’ll have tickets to a show, you’re favourite being Rocky Horror Picture Show, other times you just see where the day takes you. There's a family dinner that you go to every trip and a bar hidden down an alleyway that makes the best strawberry mojitos you’ve ever tasted. There's a thrift store you love, it always has something perfect for Robin and you always pull things out for each other and have a fashion show when you get back home.

Otherwise, she likes going to the drive-in. It took some getting used to, she once insisted going to The Hawk was the only way to truly enjoy a movie, until she realised that at the drive-in she was free to talk all she wanted.

E - Everything (You are ….)

You are my dearest secret.

F - Feelings (When did she know she was in love)

You were at a party, just a small get-together at Steve’s house with your friends.

You’re stood with Robin, as you usually are, holding tightly onto her hand as she rambled about the movie you went to at the weekend to you and the group of friends surrounding you.

“It was such a bad twist because it’s like they just pulled rules out their ass so we wouldn’t see it coming, like vampires just don’t-”

“I thought it was great, the soundtrack was fucking metal” Eddie interrupts, not letting Robin finish her sentence as he squeezed Steve further into his side, “What did you think Nance?”

Robin frows, eyebrows wrinkling in annoyance at being talked over. The conversation seemingly continues without her as every time she tries to butt back in someone talks over her.

You squeeze her hand and it’s then she remembers you’re there because you had been even quieter than she was rendered. She turns to you, finding you pressing a kiss to her neck and then whispering into her ear, “Keep going,” You whisper, breath hitting her neck and making her hair stand on edge, “I’m listening,”

G - Guilty Pleasure

Robin loves it when you give her hand massages.

Whether it's a full-on massage with lotions and nail oil or just the pressure of your thumb rubbing back and forth when you holding hands, she adores it. It relaxes her like nothing else and eases all the tension from her fingers.

She used to be self-conscious of how rough her hands were from work and the trumpet. They weren't the soft hands of all the girls in the romance books. You only saw it as an excuse to love on her even more. You’ll kiss all of her hard-earned calluses and insist she use your hand cream instead of her own because it’s better. It also makes her smell like you.

H - Honesty (What secrets does she hide from you)

Robin is awful at hiding things from you, she’s learnt the hard way not to lie to your face because you catch it immediately. She tends to lie by omission instead.

She’s a talker though and she’s accidentally ruined many birthday gifts because she’s gotten so caught up in her stories that she’s told you exactly what she bought without thinking. She doesn’t mean to, but when you ask her about her day you always insist on her telling you everything and it just slips out.

When she does lie it’s never anything cruel, just small things. At the start of your relationship, she kept quiet about a lot of your questionable fashionable choices, smiling and nodding when you would show her the ugliest pair of shoes she’d ever seen with a beaming smile. Now she’s like Michael Kors on Project Runway, she will not hold back.

After you had found out she had kept the whole, international monsters thing from you in your final year of high school you had been livid that she had gone through it all alone. When it happened again you joined her without question and the two of you very rarely kept anything from each other again.

I - Injury (how would they react if you got hurt)

She’s a huge worrier, a paper cut has her brain whirling. She’ll insist that you disinfect it because she saw something about a boy who got a paper cut and then lost his finger. Tries out home remedies if you have any aches and pains, rubbing certain oils into your aching body.

Surprisingly she’s the type to believe that rubbing tiger balm on your feet and leaving it overnight will alleviate a cold.

If she ever hurts herself you kiss her injury better. Smooching her bruises every night until they go away.

J - Jealousy (who gets more jealous, what are they like when jealous)

At the start of your relationship, she got jealous quite often, especially because you had to hide that you were together. She becomes a lot more withdrawn when she gets seriously jealous about something, so you can always tell because she barely speaks to you. She’s quick to break though, especially when you start pestering her about it with kisses.

As she becomes more secure in the relationship she rarely gets jealous anymore. Then the shoe is on the other foot because now she isn’t getting jealous, she notices just how often you do. You’re just way better at hiding it than she was. You act the opposite of Robin, rubbing your closeness in the face of whoever it is that you’re jealous of.

Sometimes it’s giving Robin back the chapstick you borrowed when a customer is flirting with her. If any boys at parties approach her you look them up and down with a death stare until they back down. Occasionally you even get jealous of Steve, sitting yourself on her lap and wrapping yourself around her like a cobra. Robin can’t deny how good it feels to have her two favourite people both wanting her company.

K - Kiss (Their favourite kind of kisses)

Robin loves all your kisses, just the fact that she gets to kiss you sometimes blows her mind. At first, she was really shy about it and didn’t know how to ask for it, her cheeks would be stained pink in embarrassment because she would be trying not to be obvious about it. It was always very obvious.

Her favourite kind of kisses are of an overzealous kind. When you lick your lips beforehand so you can plant a big fat one on her cheek. Even better if you have lip gloss on and she can feel the sticky residue afterwards. You always make a big smoochy noise as well and follow it with a million more little pecks.

She likes it when you’ve had a long day and stomp into her arms, face tucked into her neck and she kisses the top of your head. She can feel the difference, your tense posture from before the kiss, to how you melt into her a little more afterwards. It’s like her kiss washed away the stress from the day. Her little way of saying ‘I love you’ and ‘I’ve got you, it’s ok’. You get the message every time.

L - Love (Who said it first)

Look, Robin ‘motormouth’ Buckley told you at the worst time possible. I’m sorry, she just did. As soon as she realised she loved you it was so hard to keep it from you.

The same day when you asked her what she had done for the day she almost responded ‘I realised that I loved you today’. In retrospect, it’s what she wished she had done. She wanted it to be romantic though. Had spent hours at work watching romance films for inspiration.

So when she had accidentally spilt the beans in-between whines when she was been sitting on your face, she was mortified.

M - Marriage

Gay marriage is not legal for a long time, by the time it’s actually on the cards you two will have been together for so long you’d already been calling her your wife for years.

I think maybe four years into your relationship, both of you know that you’re in it for life, and you’d have a little ceremony of your own in your garden. It means so much more than a typical wedding because you get to do your own thing instead of following shitty traditions.

You’d go shopping together to buy engagement rings and matching wedding bands, which you found much more fun than the stress of trying to pick something the other person would like and secretly trying to figure out each other's ring sizes.

Steve will ‘officiate’ the ceremony and not many people will probably be invited to the actual wedding bit, but everyone will be invited to the party afterwards. Eddie's speech would be one of the highlights of the night. Along with the tally chart keeping count every time Steve burst into tears.

When marriage does become legal you would have been ‘married’ so long and your wedding in the backyard would have felt more meaningful so i feel like you would have just gone to the courthouse or something. Your friends would insist on coming though, some of them probably even bringing little flags and getting a picture of you kissing on the steps.

N- No (something that caused an argument)

Robin once thought about getting a parrot, just to teach it how to say dingus, that she would then give to Steve.

Now she just really wanted a bird.

You had to put your foot down, you rented your apartment and both worked too much to give the bird the company it needed. You were willing to compromise, but every pet she picked out was just ridiculous.

Her idea of a compromise was a lizard, but she said you would need to be the one to feed it because she couldn’t deal with the bugs. When you told her if she wanted to get a pet she would have to be the one to feed it, she changed her mind to a snake. Until you both watched a documentary and she realised what that would need to be fed.

You end up with a pair of goldfish named Tangerine and Lady Stardust. With your aloe vera plant named Robert, you think that’s enough responsibility for now. Robin is still checking out books about budgies and cockatiels, just in case.

O - Origin (who developed a crush first, who made the first move)

Robin fell first, but you fell harder.

You most certainly had to be the one to make the first move though because she keeps brushing off your flirting as you being friendly and that it’s ‘just how girls are’

P - PDA

PDA is limited, at least until being gay is more socially acceptable. Around your friends, you like to sit on her lap, kiss her cheek, and hold her hand. I don’t think Robin is likely to be comfortable doing much else in front of her friends, because she’s so easily flustered by you. Behind closed doors though, it’s another story.

Q - Quirk (what’s a quirk of hers)

Robin is a klepto, she will steal all of your stuff, at first accidentally, but then more and more often. You think it’s cute, she only steals little trinkets that you don’t need or lip balms. Sometimes she ‘forgets’ to bring back the jumpers she borrowed or the socks you lend her because her feet always get cold. She acts like she’s already given them back, but then opens the door with them on. A bit of a gaslighter, but she’s our gaslighter. When you move in together and suggest you should just combine your wardrobes she’s in heaven.

R - Rainday (What’s a typical rainy day like)

When you’re still in your twenties you love a typical girly sleepover day. Robin didn’t get a lot of those and even if she isn’t the girliest of girls, she still enjoys them.

You’ll do each other's makeup and practise new hairstyles, following tutorials in magazines. Her highlight is painting each other's nails, she likes holding your hands and how concentrated you get trying to make her look perfect.

Sometimes Nancy, Max and El will join you and you’ll all eat snacks and gossip. Offering Max and El dating advice, reading those awful teen magazines and taking all the quizzes. It’s just a fun time all around.

S - Sad (What would make her sad and how does her s/o help)

Robin often feels like an outcast and that her brain just doesn’t shut up. She doesn’t feel like she fits in with everyone else and that she’s just a bit too weird. She feels like everyone else has an instruction manual on how to be normal and hers is missing.

Becoming friends with Steve helps. Finding out she isn’t the only girl who likes girls in Hawkins helps. When you don’t lessen her feelings, but instead just tell her that you like her for exactly who she is, weird or not, that makes her feel better. When you offer to reject society with her and go live in the Alps she perks up. She finds the biggest comfort in the weight of you resting against her and the reassurance that she’s found her people now and that they all love her because of her Robinisms not despite them.

T - Talking (What do they like to talk about)

Everything. This girl does not stop talking. She can talk about anything for an impressive amount of time. She thinks it’s annoying, you think it’s a talent.

U - Understanding (How understanding are they of their partner's needs)

Robin is extremely understanding when it comes to boundaries and will actively encourage you to tell her if things make you uncomfortable. You don’t like the way the candy at Family Video sticks to your teeth? She swaps out the candy.

You don’t like loud noises at parties and like to wear earplugs? She carries a spare pair in her bag.

Her pyjama top is too scratchy against your skin? She’s throwing it off and letting you rest skin-to-skin instead.

If you don’t like to wear socks to bed she will put up with your icicle feet leeching heat from her own. She gets her own back with her cold hands when she comes back from work.

V - Vanity (How much does she care about her looks)

Robin has perfected the art of looking casually cool. She even looked good in her Scoops uniform, which should have been impossible. She still doesn’t believe that you used to drool over her in that outfit. She isn’t exactly a perfectionist when it comes to how she looks, but she does want to look nice.

W - Wildcard (Random headcanon)

I said earlier she loves fall and winter activities. I think she would collect vintage Christmas decorations, the weirder the better. It gets worse and worse as you get older until you have multiple boxes of super old Christmas decorations.

She also loves learning about traditions from different religions and places. If you celebrate something else she’s going to be all ears about what it entails and want to celebrate it with you. She’ll even try to find some vintage decorations for your holiday too.

X - X-ray (relationship headcanon)

If you’re having a petty argument or trying to convince her to do something, you like to flash her your tits. It works pretty much every time and was your secret weapon. Then she started to do it to you and you’ve been losing every argument since.

Y - Yearning (How much does she miss you)

So much! You two talk for hours every day. You’re the only person who encourages her to speak more when she rambles on a tangent and you like to have catch-ups where she tells you everything about her day. You’re also each other's safe space, you can be completely yourselves around each other and even if you’re not doing something together you like just being in the same room.

If you’re away for more than a day, when you come back she will have written down things she wanted to tell you about but didn’t want to forget. Not before she listens to you tell her everything about your time away, whether it’s an irritated rant or a gleeful story about how much fun you had.

When texting becomes an option, Robin’s phone bill grows astronomical.

Z - zzz (How do they sleep)

You on top of her, if it’s just your thigh over her own or your arm across her waist, she will take it. She needs to feel your weight on her like she needs to breathe. You like to sleep without a shirt on and you like it when she does the same, even in winter. Only on the coldest nights do you relent.

She likes to shove her hand into your underwear, it began one winter to keep them warm and now she can’t sleep without it. She also wears thick socks to bed, she’s one of the few people who’ll get wool socks for Christmas and be happy about it.

Masterlist

#robin buckley fanfic #robin buckley fluff #robin buckley blurb #robin buckley x you #robin buckley x reader #robin buckley #robin buckley drabble

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ymaohoh · 6 months ago

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'Dating Chrissy' - Hellcheer Fic - Oneshot

'It seemed that word had traveled to all the bachelors of Hawkins High that the Queen Bee herself was open to dating (and her bonehead ex was safely out of the picture). So it fell to the brave and brightest knights to try for her hand.' Chrissy's single and Nancy encourages her to try dating. Eddie's not so thrilled. Eventual happy ending and post-Vecna. Also on Archive.

Eddie cupped his hands together and yelled… “Cunningham! C’mere. You’re a goddamn genius!”

The entire hallway seemed to freeze and then turn as one to peer at the head cheerleader who was trying (and failing) not to giggle. She was scooping out books from her locker with a very bemused looking Robin Buckley waiting beside her. Both of them were well used to Eddie’s dramatics.

Chrissy grinned. “Yeah? No duh, Munson. Tell me something I don’t know.”

Eddie was beaming from ear to ear as he strode towards her, weaving round the surprised students like he didn’t even notice or care about the stares. That Eddie Munson and Chrissy Cunningham were friends was old news by now and so were the rumors about devil worship and black magic and so forth. No, for some explicable reason Chrissy seemed to enjoy The Freak’s company and their peers moved onto the next boiling pot of hot gossip.

They didn’t know that the perfect and angelic looking Chrissy was a glorified freak at heart too.

(and boy how she’d squealed when Eddie first pointed it out, after stumbling across her trying to headbang - adorably - to his mix tape. She’d swatted his arm and said ‘Eddie!’ in such a breathy happy voice that it became a badge of honor now. Big bad scary Eddie had softened like cookie dough at the mere sight).

More importantly perhaps, the other students at Hawkins High didn’t know about spring break or how the pair teamed up with other loveable misfits (‘The Party,’ Henderson dubbed them) to save the world like freakin’ superheroes.

Chrissy had nearly died that evening in Eddie’s trailer and that was a decent enough ice breaker, all things considered. Ever since then they’d sort of been thrown together - the loser junkie and Queen Bee - and it turned out they made an excellent duo. Chrissy brought the brains and the brawn, and Eddie had a smart mouth and wheels.

That kind of thing formed friendships, you know? As did carrying around the secret of Vecna all these weeks later because it was supposed to be kept totally hush hush.

Annoyingly the government suits thanked them all most profusely and patched up their wounds - but their thanks didn’t extend to canceling finals or handing out honorary diplomas. Which meant the older kids still had to knuckle down and study.

So all in all, things were looking pretty swell for Eddie right now.

He presented his latest Math test like it was the holy grail itself, spun from solid gold.

“B plus, baby, which means…drumroll please, Buckley…” he grinned as Robin dutifully taped her knuckles against the locker. “...I’ve passed O'Donnell’s class! The school’s gonna have no choice but let me graduate in green this summer, so long as I keep my head down and play nice. This dumbass you see before you is going to finally graduate. I fucking knew 1986 was going to be my year!”

Chrissy gave a loud whoop and bounced on the tips of her sneakers. She looked like she wanted to launch into a whole new cheer routine just for him.

“Eddie! That’s amazing news! I’m so proud of you!”

Eddie laughed and swung his arms around her waist before picking her up and spinning them around in circles. Chrissy giggled against his chest and didn’t seem to mind even though they were causing a small spectacle (Eddie didn’t give a shit but Chrissy could sometimes get blushy and pink if people paid her too much attention). In the distance, somewhere, Eddie heard Robin offer her own congratulations and pat him on the back.

“Knew you could do it, Eddie!” Chrissy was saying. "I just knew it."

He set her down and jammed the test safely into his backpack. He couldn’t wait to show it to Wayne. Though his uncle never scolded him for his piss poor efforts with school before, he held out hope Eddie might someday find the motivation to straighten up and apply himself.

(the government did fork out a tidy sum of cash in exchange for their silence and Wayne right away set up a college fund for Eddie (while he lay unconscious, being sewn back together like Frankenstein's monster). There was enough left over for Eddie to buy a brand new van and amp for his guitar which cheered him up).

Maybe Eddie would actually get to use that fund now.

“Nah, it’s all down to you, sweetness. Couldn’t have done it without your expert tutorage. Gonna buy you some candy or a big bunch of flowers to say thanks. What’s your poison? Roses? Want some wildflowers, Chriss? Or what about…what are they called? Chrysanthemums, like your name. I’ll fill your bedroom with them.”

When she first offered her help, he’d not been optimistic honestly. A dumbass is a dumbass, right? But hell, Chrissy was a wonderful study buddy and again they proved they made an excellent team. He thought about all those late nights together studying old test papers, the cute revision cards she made with her pink and purple gel pens, the study timetable she decorated with stickers. Turns out Eddie’s a sucker for a gold shiny star sticker...especially when Chrissy herself pressed it to the tip of his nose.

O'Donnell should seriously take notes.

Chrissy swiped her hand against his arm playfully and gave it a squeeze. “Eddie, you’re sweet, but you don’t need to do that. You worked really hard and earned this fair and square. We talked about it... the answers were already there in your brain - just whizzing around like bats. You just needed help focusing and writing it all down.”

“We should celebrate!” Robin suddenly interjected. Eddie and Chrissy both seemed to jump, as though they’d forgotten she was a part of the conversation. “This definitely feels like something we should celebrate with cliche party hats and balloons. How about Saturday night at Steve’s place? We’ve got the night off work and I know his calendar... he’s got like zero plans.”

The bell rang so Chrissy shouldered her heavy backpack and they began to walk towards the lunch hall.

Feeling a bit guilty for leaving her out, Eddie flashed Robin a huge grin and said that sounded great. They began to talk about logistics, invites, playlists, and Robin promised to bring along a pack of her dad's fancy imported beers if Eddie swore not to play any Black Sabbath.

“As long as you don’t force me in the pool again, I’m sweet, ‘cause these glorious curls can’t handle it. And I’m not playing strip poker with you again because you clearly cheated last time and Steve nearly had a stroke,” Eddie chuckled. He noticed Chrissy was a bit quiet and gently bumped her shoulder. “How about it, Cunningham? Party this weekend at Harrington’s mansion? It’s time I finally showed you how to hangbang like a true rockstar.”

Chrissy bit her lower lip.

On hindsight Eddie should’ve known that things were going just too well for him. He was due a cosmic kick between the legs.

Chrissy began to speak and three things happened to Eddie all at once. His legs forgot how to function so he missed a step, his stomach heaved like he was going to seriously throw up, and it felt like some devilish spirit had just tipped an ice cold bucket of water over his head. It wasn't pretty.

“I…I’ll be there, Eddie, of course…but I might be a little late,” she said slowly. “I’ve got a…well… a date. You know Andrew from English class, Robin? Well he asked me if I wanted to see that new horror film this Saturday and I kinda' said yes. It’ll be rude to rearrange last minute, but it’s an early showing so maybe I can ask him to drop me off at Steve’s place after? You think he’ll mind?”

Eddie was vaguely aware of Robin saying something like oh wow. That’ll be fun, Chrissy. I’m sure Andrew won’t mind dropping you off afterwards. I thought you hated horror films or did he suggest it so he could play the ‘oh she’s scared so I’ll hold her hand’ move? Guys are seriously stupid. Is this your first date since…you know…?

Chrissy nodded.

“Since Jason? Yeah. I know it’s only been a month... but Nancy knows Andrew from the school newspaper and says he’s a real great guy. She thinks I should…what did she call it? ‘Put myself out there’…and try dating again. I got with Jason when we were freshman, you know, and it all happened so fast. He gave me his letterman jacket and we went out for milkshakes …and then we were suddenly boyfriend and girlfriend. He’s the only guy I’ve seriously dated…which I guess sets a pretty low bar,” she added with a blush.

It hardly needed saying but none of Chrissy’s new friends liked her stick-up-the-ass ex-boyfriend Jason Carver. Since the first day he’d been an absolute boor about Chrissy helping the party fight Vecna and threw his weight around when he felt ignored or sidelined (which he usually was).

Chrissy admitted they’d been on the rocks for ages and his speech at the pep rally was when she knew for certain it was truly over. She’d just…outgrown him.

And now she was talking about dating again.

Eddie noticed that her hand closest to him was twitching and she was gnawing at her lip so hard it was in danger of being chewed right off. He suddenly felt like the world’s biggest jackass when she clearly needed a friend right now.

Sighing inwardly, he took a deep breath. He tried to look supportive just like Robin. “You know what? I think that sounds great.”

Chrissy and Robin both looked up at him.

Chrissy’s baby blue eyes seemed to widen. “Oh Eddie, I’m being so selfish. If you want me to cancel, of course I will. It’s amazing news and I do want to celebrate with you. Honestly…do you want me to take a rain check?”

“No no, it’s fine. I’ll see you afterwards anyway, right? We can hang out then. You should go on the date, Chriss. Honestly.”

“...Really?”

“Abso-fucking-lutely. It’ll be good for you to…put yourself out there. Nancy's right.”

“Oh. Okay…if you’re sure."

“Totally sure. Fly your freaky flag, Cunningham.”

He even pumped his fist into the air for good measure.

Chrissy smiled and then excused herself to go to the bathroom.

Eddie and Robin waited outside and Robin peered across at him. She was wearing such a painfully exasperated expression that Eddie couldn’t ignore it…though it would serve her right if he did. He sighed and ran a hand through his messy hair before speaking, knowing full well where this conversation was heading.

He’d had similar awkward chats with Nancy and Steve and Dustin which usually resulted in a lot of eye rolling (and name calling).

“You look like an owl.”

“I’m just flabbergasted, Munson. Truly flabbergasted.”

“Right…go ahead and spit it out before you explode.”

“The wonderfully beautiful and amazing Chrissy Cunningham, who is honestly too good for the likes of any of us really, just asked if you were sure she should date…and you responded with…and I quote… let your ‘freaky flag fly’. You know that was the exact moment in chick flicks where the romantic hero finally admits their true feelings, and they both swoon and kiss face. It was the perfect setup…”

“Buckley…I swear to god...”

“You’ve been making gooey eyes at Chrissy since day one, Munson, and now she’s ditched dickhead Carver and ready to move on…and you give her your blessing? Really? You’re seriously okay with the idea of her dating Andrew and holding hands and smooching and…”

“Okay…okay…hush!”

The hallway was pretty busy and although Robin was using her inside voice, Eddie was still nervous about being overheard especially with her throwing around words like swoon and smooch. And also yeah…he wasn’t totally over the moon with picturing Chrissy doing any of that stuff with whoever the hell this Andrew was.

“What exactly am I supposed to say?” he shrugged. He crossed his arms like a shield.

"You could start with being honest."

“Fine...here's the shitty truth. Did I think that maybe there was something between me and Chriss when everything went down with Vecna? Sure, yeah. I’d freak out when she flirted back or hugged me…but clearly I was wrong or misread things, and she only sees me as a friend. Which is fine, by the way, being her friend is a fucking honor.”

Robin was shaking her head. “Dude, it wasn’t nothing. We all noticed it.”

“Yeah? Look, it doesn’t matter either way. Deep down I knew how this fantasy would play out and I’ve got no expectations. This is reality. She’s going to a good college after summer and she’s so smart she’ll ace it and have this amazing perfect life…and my dumbass will only hold her back. I know how goddamn beautiful and amazing Chrissy is, okay? She’s a fucking angel. But I’m…me… and like you just said, she’s so far out of my league it’s like we’re a different species; she’s some lovely elf and I’m this cave goblin. I get it. In the real world…me and her just don’t make sense. I know it. She knows it. You know it.”

Shit. He hadn't meant to let it all come pouring out at once. Clearly he'd been bottling up more teenage angst than he knew.

Robin was looking at him now with something akin to surprise and sympathy. She was evidently not expecting this outpour of brutal honesty from him. Sarcasm and jokes maybe, or him telling her to go to hell, but not whatever this was. For all her wise cracks and joking, Robin was annoyingly perceptive.

“Big words for a fantasy nerd. She’s your fairy muse, the princess at the end of the quest. You think you can really let her go?” she asked after a pause.

“If this really was a dumb movie and I admitted all this stuff…you know what would happen? A big fat nothing. She’d blush and say ‘sorry, Eddie’ and be so crazy kind when she let me down. No swooning or…riding off into the sunset or whatever. Sorry to disappoint.”

“So what if she has a good time with Andrew? What if they hit it off and sparks fly. You’d be fine seeing that?”

“Fuck no but I’m still not going to say anything.”

“But…”

Eddie cleared his throat. “Look...I wasn’t lying to her. It would be good for her to date someone other than that prick Jason. After everything we’ve been through…she fucking deserves to be happy, you know? Let her be a kid and have some damn fun.”

He’d been so proud when she mustered the confidence to finally dump Jason, and when she stood up to her crappy asshole parents too. She was grabbing life by the horns and who was he to throw a spanner in the works because of feelings?

Robin sighed. She looked like a deflated balloon.

“You’re a good guy, Eddie,” she said. “But this is going to end in heartbreak.”

“I’ll handle it. Just stitch me right back up again, right? What’s a few more scars…”

‘Let her have some damn fun.’

He didn’t feel so benevolent when Saturday finally rolled around.

Eddie arrived at Steve’s that afternoon trying to keep upbeat (the freshmen were coming so they decided to start the celebrations early so they could make their curfews and still have time to par-tay). He found plenty of other things to think about... and Robin came through with the promise of fancy booze as a well done gift.

Steve started up the BBQ and bought some beers and wine coolers with strict instructions to the younger party members they were only allowed one (though Lucas definitely swiped more). He was wearing a jazzy orange apron and still somehow managed to look effortlessly cool flipping burgers. He’d clapped Eddie on the back when he arrived and murmured something about third time’s the charm but he sounded genuinely pleased for him. He seemed fine with them commandeering his home for the evening (or was just used to it by now).

Nancy had brought along party hats and balloons and streamers (again as promised. They looked like something from a kid’s birthday party and Eddie beamed - especially when she strong-armed Jonathan into wearing a pointy hat).

They decorated everything tastefully at first, but after some wine coolers Nancy and Robin became more confident with their artistic abilities and the garden soon turned into a mess of white and red streamers and balloons.

Chuckling, Eddie settled back onto one of the pool loungers and cracked open the lid of his fancy beer feeling pretty good. Steve passed him a burger with all the trimmings and Max put Kate Bush on the stereo.

(Dustin had heard about the gold stickers from Chrissy and brought along a sheet as a gag gift. Eddie was now sporting a star on either cheek. Jeff had them stuck all over his face. They were currently paying a silent game of who could pin the most on Steve without him noticing.)

It was chaos and Eddie loved it. They were all such weirdos.

They talked about everything and nothing for a while when he noticed Lucas and Max holding hands. They were dating again and it seemed to be going well.

But seeing that made him think about Chrissy who was at that exact moment in time (he checked Nancy’s watch to be sure) sitting in a dark movie theater with her date, watching a scary film. Chrissy was terrible with horror films - she’d had to hide behind his hands when Will put on Friday the 13th - so it was a cunning move on Andrew’s part if he wanted an excuse to get close to her. Plenty of chances to hold her hand, tuck her close to his side, maybe even wrap his arm around her shoulders if he was feeling brave.

Was she holding his hand right now? Were they sharing a soda with just one straw?

He didn’t know Andrew nor did he want to give Robin the satisfaction of asking. Was he another Carver with big shoulders and perfect smooth blond hair?

Eddie seriously needed a joint and Jonathan joined him down the street to smoke. It helped a bit.

It was nearly 8pm when he finally heard a car pull up and the passenger door slam shut. They all looked round as Chrissy opened the side gate and stepped through to the garden. It was getting dark (though Steve had rigged up some electric lights), and they were still hanging out in the garden drinking and playing silly games.

Chrissy gave them all a big wave and smiled brightly. She was thankfully alone.

They beckoned her over (Nancy rushed up to give her a hug) and Eddie noticed no one asked where she’d been which meant they all knew about the date. He noticed Dustin and Steve glancing at him to gauge his reaction.

Chrissy snagged a wine cooler from the icebox and plopped down in the spare spot beside Eddie. She wasn’t dressed up exactly but she’d made a noticeable effort to style her hair and put on a blue sundress that Eddie had once said was pretty. She was wearing a new perfume too.

“Hey guys. What’s with all the streamers? Steve, why do you have stickers all over your ass?” She giggled.

“Goddamn it.”

“We like to party in style, Cunningham,” Eddie smiled in greeting. Jonathan had two party hats on his head now and was putting on some Dio. Finally. Jeff and Gareth let out a cheer. “Drink up, you’ve got some catching up to do. Wheeler was just explaining why there’s no bouncy castle.”

Nancy spluttered something about not being kids anymore which was Robin’s cue to then suggest strip poker which everyone shut down. Steve offered to play normal poker and she accepted it grudgingly.

The freshmen were ready to head off anyway and Robin went to the kitchen for more beers.

“I still don’t know how to play,” Chrissy whispered to him.

“Stick with me kid, you can be on my team,” he said conspiringly. “Only don’t blurt out what cards we have like last time, ‘kay?”

Chrissy grinned and she nudged her leg against his. “Sorry I’m late. I’m really proud of you for today, Eddie. Now we can graduate together!”

Eddie nudged her back.

He very deliberately didn’t ask about her evening nor did she bring it up either, though Nancy apparently cornered her later on for a full breakdown. Eddie had just decided that he was at peace with things and didn’t need to know any details (the date was over, right? And she seemed happy to be here with him) when he walked in on Nancy and Robin discussing it in the kitchen while fetching ice.

Nancy noticed him right away and raised her voice so that he could hear too.

“...she said Andrew took himself way too seriously. Said it was like being with Jason all over again. Apparently he kept going on about all the writing awards he’d won and it came off as serious bragging, and he’s got his whole life planned out where he’s going to be this famous writer. You know Chrissy, she’s way too polite to shut that shit down, but she’s after fun, right? Who needs all that heavy stuff on a first date? She said it was like being interviewed for a job.”

“Ugh. Way too much male ego,” Robin cringed. “Guess there’s not gonna be a date two for Andrew?”

“I doubt it, but she said it’s not put her off dating. Let’s hope the next guy shows her a better time.”

Nancy was very pointedly looking at him now.

He rolled his eyes and went back through to the other room where they were still playing poker. Robin was winning but Eddie and Chrissy were coming a close second (all Eddie’s doing - Chrissy, bless her, couldn’t bluff at all). Jonathan was staring at his cards as though he could magically change them with mere force of will...though maybe he was too stoned to see clearly.

Eddie sat down on his seat and took a very large gulp of his fancy beer.

Chrissy was leaning across the table to look at their cards and kept whispering questions in his ear, so he wrapped an arm around her waist and tugged her over so she could perch on his lap instead. Her perfume smelled like strawberries and vanilla and he took a deep breath.

“Sit tight and buckle in, sweetness. We’re gonna win.”

(they didn’t, but they were having too much fun to care)

Though poor Andrew didn’t get another date, Chrissy soon found herself another one. It seemed that word had traveled to all the bachelors of Hawkins High that the Queen Bee herself was open to dating (and her bonehead ex was safely out of the picture). So it fell to the brave and brightest knights to try for her hand.

This time it was a guy from the Photography club. Jonathan gave him the all clear when Chrissy probed.

“He’s called James,” Chrissy revealed at lunch. She was picking at her sandwich. “He was very sweet actually - he wrote me a little note saying how he’d always had a soft spot for me from afar. We’re going to park up by the lake and go for a hike this weekend.”

Lover’s Lake.

“A hike on a first date?” Nancy raised an eyebrow. “It’s not exactly traditional…”

Jonathan shrugged beside her. “I think it’s nice. Plenty of time and space to talk in private and get to know each other. He’s a quiet guy.”

He promised to take Nancy on a hike and she softened like melted butter.

“I think he’s going to bring his camera actually - he said he would show me how it works and then maybe we could develop the photos together too.”

“All alone in the darkroom,” Robin sniggered. “This James seems to have it all figured out, I’m half impressed. What are you gonna wear, Chriss?”

“Oh! I guess my workout gear? Or would that be too casual? Maybe I should wear some shorts? I can’t exactly wear a dress if we’re hiking.”

“Wear those tiny black shorts you’ve got. That’ll give him something to photograph.”

Chrissy blushed to the very roots of her hair but Eddie noticed she didn’t say no.

Eddie kept silent throughout and focused on his own lunch.

Unlike Andrew, Eddie actually knew James and had even sold him weed before. James was very different from Jason's all-American vibe; tall, dark hair (that always looked perfectly tousled), and a serious (but sensitive) expression on his face. He could often be found with a camera slung around his neck wearing the kind of shabby clothes girls seemed to feel were cool and artistic.

Eddie sat behind him in class Friday afternoon and tried hard not to glare daggers into his back. Was he thinking about the weekend instead of whatever war the teacher was droning on about? He would be.

To Eddie’s utter dismay James actually turned around when the bell went and gave Eddie a tight smile.

“Hey Munson, you know Chrissy Cunningham, right? You’re friends?”

“Sure.”

“Well I’m taking her out this weekend, maybe she told you? But I’m kind of freaking out a bit…I mean…it’s her, you know? I thought maybe I should buy some flowers and surprise her? Do you know what she likes?”

A diabolical part of Eddie wanted to mess with him but he managed to keep his cool. This was for Chrissy, after all, and he wanted her to have a nice time.

“Get her Chrysanthemums,” he said, getting to his feet. “And make her laugh, alright?”

That whole weekend Eddie tried to keep busy. He cleaned his entire bedroom, gave the kitchen a scrub, even mowed the patch of grass out front. Wayne didn’t say a word though he pressed a hand to Eddie’s forehead to make sure he wasn’t feeling sick. Eddie tried to practice his guitar but found his concentration was all over the place.

He thought seriously about taking a long drive (maybe towards Reefer Rick’s and a certain lake nearby) but tossed the idea aside.

When he got to school Monday, he wanted to just head to class and forget all about the weekend - though at the same time he desperately wanted to hear every detail too. It had been a gloriously sunny weekend (perfect for stomping around nature) and the lake had probably looked picture perfect. Did they have fun? Joke? Did Chrissy wear those tiny black shorts that cupped her ass so perfectly? Most importantly… did Chrissy have a nice time?

It was Jonathan who finally took pity on him. They were sharing a smoke out in the woods before lunch period.

“Go on…hit me with it,” Eddie breathed out long and hard.

Best to get a heads up now before lunch with everyone’s curious eyes flickering to him to assess his reaction.

Jonathan watched him carefully as he spoke.

“...Chrissy called Nance up last night on the phone. Said the hike was nice but really awkward. Apparently James turned up with roses which she hates and barely said a word the whole time. She figured it was just nerves and tried hard to fill in the blanks - you know how nice she can be - but he wouldn’t take the hint.”

“Ah…”

That Jonathan was saying that, when he was a pretty awkward guy himself, must have meant it was truly bad.

“I guess you and Nancy won’t have to share the darkroom.”

Jonathan coughed and blushed but rather tellingly didn’t say a word.

Eddie couldn’t help but feel pleased that it was a dud even though Chrissy looked pretty disappointed when she spoke about it at lunch. She told them how beautiful the lake was but no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t coax much out of James which was frankly bizarre because even Mr Wheeler had warmed up to Chrissy. If she was a D&D character she would have critically high charisma stats.

Eddie noticed that after Chrissy finished talking she didn’t touch her lunch. Her fingers tore up the sandwich into little scraps while their friends tore into James, oblivious.

He could almost see the cogs of her brain turning. Hear the anxious little thoughts gnawing away at her confidence.

Screw that.

So of course Eddie interrupted and started talking about the time Jeff got so high at Rick’s place that he jumped into the lake fully clothed, forgetting that he couldn’t in fact swim. It had taken both Grant and Eddie to fish him out because he wanted to stay in and make friends with the ‘fishes’. He mimed it out at the lunch table, hamming it up to the max, and making Jeff’s blazed expression even more cartoonish. Jeff himself sat at the table and laughed along with the others at the performance, taking it in his stride.

Eddie watched as Chrissy picked up her lunch and began to eat. She sniggered along with everyone else when Eddie pretended to be Jeff falling asleep in the bathtub (when they finally dragged him back to the house to hose down).

She even munched on the chocolate muffin he threw at her.

He felt his chest relax.

Chrissy was a popular girl and so the date offers naturally kept coming, and Chrissy bravely didn’t let the last attempts put her off. She wanted to try dating and reasoned surely the next one would be better?

And it was.

This time it was with another jock from the basketball team who Lucas was friendly with. He was called Christopher and apparently didn’t care about stepping on Jason’s toes one bit if it meant landing a date with Chrissy. Even Eddie had to admire the bold move.

(and yes Chrissy laughed when Dustin pointed out the inevitable dilemma should someone call out ‘Chris/Chriss!')

Christopher was a jock but Lucas promised Chrissy he was one of the good ones and she accepted his offer to go to the town fair that weekend. Christopher had the typical athletes frame and swagger, but the smile he gave Chrissy by her locker seemed sincere.

Eddie didn’t even need to get the lowdown from Lucas that Monday because he went to the fair himself along with the others. He was having a pretty good evening eating cotton candy and scaring Steve in the Haunted House, when he spied Chrissy and Christopher lining up for the ferris wheel.

Keen to be a gent, Christopher was maintaining a decent amount of distance between them but when it was their turn to step on the ride, Christopher placed a hand on her lower back to help her up and they sat snuggly together in the small car. There was something intimate about the way their bodies were pushed together and they whispered back and forth.

He saw Chrissy tip her head back in laughter and felt a knot in his stomach. Eddie really fucking tried not to stare. He truly did.

That Monday Chrissy told them the date went well and Christopher had walked her home after, even impressing the dragon that was her mother when she spotted his letterman jacket. That bothered Eddie more than anything else, honestly, especially when he glanced down at his ripped jeans and scuffed boots. Her mom was such a damn cliche.

Eddie had to resist the urge to roll his eyes.

“...But I’m not sure there’s going to be a date two,” Chrissy said, nonchalantly sipping her water. “We both like sports but we don’t have much else in common, and I don’t know how I feel about dating another athlete…no offense Lucas...but it’s a lot of pressure. Plus the smug look on my mom’s face kinda turned me off. The last thing I want is for her to think I’m trying to crawl back into her good books by dating someone like Jason.”

“But it went well?” Nancy pressed. “You had fun?”

Chrissy smiled. “Yeah I did…I think we can chalk that up to one successful date so far.”

Then came David from the swim team. He had a BMW but was more interested in looking at his reflection than looking at her.

Then came Joshua from band. Chrissy called him sweet but way too handsy.

(Eddie felt his jaw clench, what did she mean by handsy? He was saved by Nancy who offered to find her guns…hard to say if she was serious or not)

Annnnnnd then along came John.

John picked up weekend shifts at Family Video and asked her if she wanted to grab a milkshake after school. He seemed confident and cool and Steve told her he was saving up to take a year off before college and do some enlightened soul searching. Chrissy and Nancy made impressed ‘oooo’ noises when Steve explained that meant backpacking around Asia.

“I’ve never thought about traveling,” Chrissy said. “I think I’d like to, you know. California, Paris, maybe Rome? Wouldn’t that be so romantic? Or maybe go to England and see all the castles and lakes. I don’t wanna’ be stuck in the midwest forever.”

So they went out and had milkshakes. It was all so cute and twee. He knew Chrissy would probably pick strawberry, her favorite.

The next morning Robin pounced on him as soon as he parked up his van.

“So Chrissy rang me last night after John dropped her home on his motorcycle,” she greeted.

“Be still my beating heart. How punk rock.”

“The date went seriously well, Eddie. Chrissy’s made up. She was gushing about how interesting he was and how dreamy his eyes were. She reckons they’re the same colour as the sky...”

“Don’t you think it’s a bit early in the day for kicking a man when he’s down?” he grumbled, slamming the car door with more force than was strictly necessary.

“They kissed.”

Honestly, that alone felt like a fucking bullet to Eddie’s chest and his face might’ve betrayed this for a fraction of a second before he pulled on his best DM mask. Instead he pulled out a cigarette and lit it. He tried to look as cool as a cucumber though his thoughts were racing. Maybe it was only a polite peck on the cheek and Robin was just winding him up? Goddamn, had she worn her bubblegum lipgloss? Were tongues involved?

“And you’re telling me that delightful piece of gossip because…?”

“Because she had a nice time! For all we know there could be a date two,” Robin explained, exasperated. “This is getting out of hand now, Munson.”

“Who Chrissy dates or… kisses…is none of my business, Buckley. I told you, there’s nothing between me and Chrissy. We’re just friends.”

“Look, I saw you at the fair looking fucking devastated when you saw her cuddling with that Christopher guy. What if she sees John again and this time they do more than kiss…what if they have sex?”

“Buckley!”

“What? You gunna’ be fine hearing all about that?”

“...it’s not…” he groaned. “I can’t have this conversation. Seriously.”

He tried walking away but she clung onto his arm.

“Eddie.”

Eddie looked back and was struck by how serious Robin looked.

His voice cracked a little as he said, “...they really kissed? She said that?”

“Yeah.”

Eddie groaned and rubbed a hand over his eyes. The idea of Chrissy doing that did bother him. It bothered him more than he could’ve ever imagined. He knew he had no right to feel jealous but it crept over him like a wave. Everything he’d said to Robin before all this dating mess was still true - he still believed Chrissy was out of his league, that she deserved better - but hell, he hadn’t even tried. He’d given up at the first hurdle and she was slipping away. He was such a damn coward.

He thought about the last few weeks, about how desperately he wanted to be the one to take her out for milkshakes and hold her hand on the carnival rides. More than that…he wanted to be the guy to make her giggle and smile and feel happy.

But...didn't he do that?

Something twisted in his chest and he suddenly realized he was that guy. Had been all along. Didn’t she light up like a star whenever he hugged her or clowned around just to cheer her up?

She always looked at him like he was the only other person in the world. They were the perfect team, totally in sync.

Chrissy was his goddamn dream girl.

What the fuck was he doing?

“I don’t believe for one minute you’ve given up on her…” Robin said.

Eddie sighed. “I’m such an idiot.”

“Yep.”

“Is it too late, d’you think? Is she into John?”

“She’s into you more. Always has been.”

“What if…”

What if she didn’t feel that way anymore? What if she wanted to date John and go traveling? He had a motorbike and all Eddie had was a beat up van. What if? What if? What if?

Robin picked up on his panic and she offered him a shaky smile.

“Let me give you a piece of advice, loser to loser. If you want a chance with Chrissy Cunningham you’d better step the fuck up and ask her out now, because honestly? I think you’d be really perfect together. She’s been looking for you all this time, bonehead.”

Eddie huffed a laugh into the collar of his jacket and knew he was blushing.

He clapped Robin on the shoulder. She was a pretty good friend, even if she was annoying as shit.

“Now go get your princess!”

Eddie didn’t go to Chrissy right away. If he was going to do this, he was going to do it right. He didn’t want to be one of the other guys who casually held her back after class or slipped a note in her locker asking if she wanted a date. He was Eddie. Her Eddie.

And Eddie’s pesky brain had a tendency to go into overdrive.

So that weekend he drove like a wildcat to the ‘nice side’ of Hawkins. He didn’t dare knock at her front door wearing a suit and tie as he was pretty certain her mom would call the cops. Instead he parked his shitty van down the street and approached by foot. Her home looked exactly like a showhouse from the cover of Better Homes and Gardens magazine; pristine, tidy, unnerving. Even the grass was mowed in perfect lines.

It was a reflection of Chrissy from before. Like ivy, it threatened to strangle her.

Eddie would rather take his crappy trailer anyday.

(so would Chrissy. She said she felt more at home in the Munson homestead than she ever had at her childhood home. It kind of sucked that she felt that way…even though it made Eddie’s stomach twist into knots).

It started to rain (obviously) as he approached the house and carefully climbed the trellis.

The rain made the wood slippery. It wasn’t the first time he'd scaled the side of her house, but it was the first time he’d done so carrying a heavy rucksack over his shoulder. He hoped the trellis would hold the weight okay. It would be just his luck to come crashing down into Mr Cunningham’s award winning rose bushes and alert the entire neighborhood.

He knocked smartly at her window.

“Eddie!” Chrissy hurriedly opened the window. Her expression was one of total shock. “What are you doing, you weirdo? You’re totally soaked!”

She was wearing a fluffy pink bathrobe and slippers. She looked as sweet as cotton candy.

She was tugging him inside and he landed on the carpet with a soft thump. They waited for a second to see if the noise would summon her demon of a mother, but all remained quiet. She grinned at him like they were co-conspirators of a jewel heist.

“What are you doing here?” she asked again.

She’d clearly just stepped out the shower. A neatly ironed outfit was spread out on the bed behind her and she had the radio on. He vaguely recognised the preppy tones of Cyndi Lauper.

“Clearly just dropping by to see you, Cunningham. Thought that was obvious.”

Chrissy wrinkled her perfect nose and he had the irresistible urge to bite it. “And you didn’t want to use the door because…?”

She offered him a towel to dry off with and he took it gratefully. His teeth were chattering…from the cold and nerves. Eddie didn’t get nervous often but Chrissy always had this effect on him.

“I’m making a grand gesture.”

“Okay…”

Only then did he open the rucksack. Chrissy watched him silently as he brought out a (crumpled) bouquet of orange and yellow flowers. Then a checked blanket. Then some cutlery and a Tupperware box. Then a few other items to really set the scene. He'd always had a good eye for detail.

He sank to his knees and spread it all out on her bedroom floor. "You're gonna' have to imagine the carpet is grass and there's a babbling brook somewhere."

"It's a picnic. Why are we having a picnic, Eddie?" she knelt down beside him on the blanket. "You made peanut butter and jelly!"

Her favorite snack. She used to have it as a kid before her mom got so fussy and it reminded her of her grandma. He used his lighter to light a candle and placed it carefully between them.

He took a deep breath. It was now or never…

“Are you going to see John again?”

She was clearly not expecting that. She blinked. “I…He mentioned something about meeting up again, yes.”

“Chriss. Do me a favor?”

“Yeah?”

“Don’t.”

He watched as her lovely blue eyes widened in surprise.

“What do you…”

“Go out with me.”

His heart missed a beat.

“Eddie…?”

“Go on a date with me. We can do whatever you want… a hike or a dinner or movie. Whatever. Just as long as it’s with me. I’ll be real honest… I meant it before when I said you deserve some fun…but it’s been crazy watching you go off on these dates and come back each time goddamn bored or disappointed. You deserve fun, Cunningham… and I’m it. I’m the fun. Come out with me and let me show you a hella' good time.”

He wanted so badly to hide behind the curtain of his hair, but held steady. He’d been practicing that speech for hours - trying so hard to make it sound light and funny - instead of spilling all the lovey dovey stuff that he truly felt. Maybe one day he’d get a chance to say all of that...but... baby steps.

“What do you say, Chriss?”

And then Chrissy was grinning from ear to ear. She began to giggle which turned into a laugh which turned into happy tears. If he could bottle that fucking amazing smile he would. He found himself grinning back.

“What took you so long, Munson?” she beamed. “I’ve been waiting forever for you.”

They should engrave that on his headstone. No words would ever sound sweeter.

She slipped her hand into his.

“So that’s a yes? You gonna date me?”

“I’m gonna date you,” Chrissy agreed. “I’m gonna date you so hard.”

41 notes · View notes

goodgriefnd · 2 years ago

Text

How Common is Neurodivergence?

[image id: poster of "How Common is Neurodivergence?.” There are 12 circles and five small images: an image of a brain, speech bubbles, an infinity sign, a person reading, and a person surrounded by arrows and balls. Each of the 12 circles has a percentage representing how common a particular form of neurodivergence is written in Open Dyslexic font. Full transcript, more information, and references under the cut.]

More Information

Forms of neurodivergence represented here are focused on neurodevelopmental disorders.

These percentages are representative of percentage in general population and do not reflect percentages within neurotypes which are often higher due to co-occurrence being the norm, rather than the exception, within neurodevelopmental disorders; for example, 33-45% of people with ADHD will also have dyslexia (Butterworth & Kovas, 2013), whereas only 10% of the general population are dyslexic (British Dyslexia Association [BDA], 2023).

Certain neurodivergencies are often underrepresented and under-reported, so the percentages are likely to be higher; for example, one study suggests that rates for FASD in the UK may be as high as 17% (McQuire et al., 2019).

Some of the neurodivergencies represented here are umbrella terms and percentages given are representative of all forms of neurodiversity belonging to that term; for example, SpLds include dyslexia which is at a rate of 10% (BDA, 2023) and dyscalculia which is at 3-7% (Haberstroh & Schulte-Körne., 2019). Tic Disorders at 1% are another example here, as this is inclusive of Tourette Syndrome which is at 0.6%, and around 1 in 5 individuals exhibit tics at some point during childhood (Cavanna et al., 2017).

______________

Transcript in Full

1% Intellectual Disability

10% Language Disorder

4% Speech Sound Disorder

5% Stuttering

7.5% Social (Pragmatic) Communication Disorder

1.7% Autism

5% ADHD

10% Specific Learning Disorder (SpLD)

5% Developmental Co-Ordination Disorder (DCD)

3-4% Stereotypic Movement Disorder

1% Tic Disorders

3.6% Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorders (FASD)

______________

Sources

American Psychiatric Association. (2022). Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (5th Ed., Text Rev.).

Arvidsson, O., Gillberg, C., Lichtenstein, P., & Lundström, S. (2018). Secular changes in the symptom level of clinically diagnosed autism. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 59(7), 744–751.

Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). PsychDB. (2022, November 29).

Autism spectrum disorder (ASD). PsychDB. (2022, May 19).

Butterworth, B., & Kovas, Y. (2013). Understanding neurocognitive developmental disorders can improve education for all. Science, 340(6130), 300–305.

Cavanna, A. E., Coffman, K.A., Cowley, H., Fahn, S., Franklin, M. E., Gilbert, D.L., Hershey, T.G., Jankovic, J., Jones, M., Leckman, J.F., Lehman, R., Mathews, C.A., Malaty, I., McNaught, K., Mink, J.W., Okun, M.S., Rowe, J.A., Scahill, L.D., Scharf, J.M., Schlaggar, B.L., Stewart, E., Walkup, J.T., Woods, D.W.. (2017). The spectrum of Tourette Syndrome and TIC disorders: A consensus by Scientific Advisors of the Tourette Association of America. Tourette Association of America.

British Dyslexia Association. (2023). Dyslexia. British Dyslexia Association.

Dyspraxia at a glance. Dyspraxia Foundation. (2023).

Haberstroh, S., & Schulte-Körne, G. (2019). The Diagnosis and Treatment of Dyscalculia. Deutsches Arzteblatt International, 116(7), 107–114.

Ketelaars, M. P., Cuperus, J. M., van Daal, J., Jansonius, K., & Verhoeven, L. (2009). Screening for pragmatic language impairment: The potential of the Children’s Communication Checklist. Research in Developmental Disabilities, 30(5), 952–960.

May, P. A., Baete, A., Russo, J., Elliott, A. J., Blankenship, J., Kalberg, W. O., Buckley, D., Brooks, M., Hasken, J., Abdul-Rahman, O., Adam, M. P., Robinson, L. K., Manning, M., & Hoyme, H. E. (2014). Prevalence and characteristics of fetal alcohol spectrum disorders. Pediatrics, 134(5), 855–866.

McQuire, C., Mukherjee, R., Hurt, L., Higgins, A., Greene, G., Farewell, D., Kemp, A., & Paranjothy, S. (2019). Screening prevalence of fetal alcohol spectrum disorders in a region of the United Kingdom: A population-based birth-cohort study. Preventive Medicine, 118, 344–351.

Norbury, C. F., Gooch, D., Wray, C., Baird, G., Charman, T., Simonoff, E., Vamvakas, G., & Pickles, A. (2016). The impact of nonverbal ability on prevalence and clinical presentation of language disorder: Evidence from a population study. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 57(11), 1247–1257.

Polanczyk, G. V., Willcutt, E. G., Salum, G. A., Kieling, C., & Rohde, L. A. (2014). ADHD prevalence estimates across three decades: an updated systematic review and meta-regression analysis. International Journal of Epidemiology, 43(2), 434–442.

Polanczyk, G., de Lima, M. S., Horta, B. L., Biederman, J., & Rohde, L. A. (2007). The worldwide prevalence of ADHD: A systematic review and metaregression analysis. American Journal of Psychiatry, 164(6), 942–948.

Prevalence and Therapy Rates for Stuttering, Cluttering, and Developmental Disorders of Speech and Language: Evaluation of German Health Insurance Data. (2021). Frontiers in Human Neuroscience, 15(645292), 1–13.

Social (pragmatic) communication disorder. PsychDB. (2021, March 29).

Stereotypic movement disorder. United Brain Association. (2022, August 8).

Wren, Y., Miller, L. L., Peters, T. J., Emond, A., & Roulstone, S. (2016). Prevalence and predictors of persistent speech sound disorder at eight years old: Findings from a population cohort study. Journal of Speech, Language, and Hearing Research, 59(4), 647–673.

UCL. (2013, April 19). Learning disabilities affect up to 10 per cent of children. UCL News.

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cherrylng · 3 months ago

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Headline - Bright Eyes+Muse interviews [ROCKIN'ON (March 2000)]

The year 2000 starts here! Is the impatience that can only be tolerated by a dazzling youth the birth of the Year Zero generation? Rockin'On fully supports Bright Eyes and Muse, the two passions that run around while showing off the physique of young boys, and offers tickets to support their visit to Japan!

Interview: Mariko SAKAMOTO Photography: JIM NEWBERRY (Bright Eyes) Interpretation: Erika YAMASHITA (Muse)

The noisy days of Y2K! and the bubble era have returned to normal, and the onslaught of millennium visits to Japan has come to an end, but is it time to breathe a sigh of relief? Has anything started to happen? Year 2000 = Year Zero. It's only a matter of time, but we'd like to introduce two newcomers who make you feel that the year 2000 is just around the corner. Bright Eyes is a band centred on Conor Oberst, a home recording poet from Omaha, Nebraska, USA. Their interactions with the Athens scene are also a hot topic, but technically they can't be called newcomers, having released a compilation even before their debut full-length album was released last year. However, the self-denial and (literally) exploding shouts heard on their latest EP 'Every Day and Every Night' show an awakening of the core of expression in a style that has tended to veer towards experimental pop. Already waiting for their second release, it is a unique singing voice that cradles bottomless sadness in their clear eyes. In contrast, Muse are a three-piece from Devon, UK. They first attracted the attention of an American record company and were signed to Maverick. Although there was a feeling that the band was ahead of its time, their single ‘Muscle Museum’ broke through on the UK indie charts last year. The drama is sharply played by a blue, straightforward guitar sound that has been compared to early Radiohead. I'm sure I'm not the only one who is reminded of Jeff Buckley, with vocalist Matt Bellamy's rich expressiveness underpinning the high level of perfection of their debut. Both have very different sounds, but their straightforward voices are tugging at your heartstrings. The voice that started it all was always so vivid. With that voice, the clock starts ticking again.

"Writing songs was like smashing a windowpane."

(BRIGHT EYES/Conor Oberst) ● You started writing songs when you were about 11 years old, what was it like when you ‘discovered’ guitars and four-track recording equipment? 「Yeah, it was like, “I'm glad I found something to do”. It's like keeping a diary. It's a way of expressing your feelings in a more proper way. …… Compared to when I was a smaller kid. It's like writing a song on a four-track or throwing something at a window and smashing it, they're both the same thing.」

● Were there other kids around your age when you started writing songs who were making songs with four-tracks and guitars? 「Not quite the same age, but I had older friends who were writing songs. They were about five or six years older than me. They all encouraged me to write songs too. I'm still hanging out with them and making music with them.」

● I see. So you prefer sitting alone in a dark basement and recording than going out and playing with friends or skateboarding or anything like that? 「Haha (laughs). No, there are two sides to me, I guess. I like having fun too. I like to have fun, I like to throw parties, but…… But I always end up going home and spending time alone (laughs).」

● Yes, yes (laughs)…… Well, I believe you're 19 (20 this year), you're attending university, aren't you? 「Yeah…… Um, I'm actually going to take a leave of absence from next semester. I'm thinking of doing a lot of touring and stuff.」

● So you're planning to concentrate on your music? 「Yeah, hopefully. I'm going to take this semester off, and if it goes well, then I can continue with music. So I'm putting off my studies for a while (bursts out laughing). No, it's not that I don't like university, but I don't know exactly what I want to do……」

● That's unreliable. I have the impression that you write and record songs almost every day, but when do you feel the strongest urge to write songs? 「Well…… It's a bit of a strange feeling. Sometimes songs come out of a depressed mood. In that case, I just run to the guitar and play it straight away. But if I try to force myself to sit down and say, "Come on, I've got to write", I feel like it's never going to work. So I guess you have to wait for the ‘moment’ to come. And those moments are when I don't feel very good, like when I'm sad. That's why my songs sound like that. But I'm thinking that I need to get out of that. I want to write happier songs. Because …… I don't want to just make the listener sad all the time.」

● I see. And your debut album as an original, "Letting Off the Happiness", seemed a bit scattered. It was more like a collection of songs rather than an album. 「No, it was meant to be a single album. But because of the way we recorded it, the result was kind of…… It's a bit of a jagged, cut-and-paste, patched-together kind of sound. Because the album was recorded partly in my parents' basement, partly at a friend's house, and partly at Ascend in a completely different environment, so it's got that kind of disjointed sound. It ended up being a kind of collage of different sound qualities. In terms of the songs, I think thematically it's like an album, but maybe in terms of the way it sounds, there's a lot of ebb and flow to it.」

● Are you satisfied with the results? I got the impression that you weren't really interested in the cohesion of an album. 「No, not at all. I've just finished a new album, and it's more…… smooth and unified. I'm trying to work in that direction now, but when I was making ‘Letting~’…… I wasn't so concerned about cohesion (laughs). What can I say, I just…… I wanted it to sound intuitive, like I was reacting to something. I didn't want it to be a nice, well-proportioned piece of work.」

● Is that so? So, when I listen to your EP ‘Everyday and Every Night’, I feel that your songwriting is becoming more straightforward. 「Yeah, I think that's right. I always hope I'm growing as a writer (laughs). But you can't tell if you're growing or not, can you? But I feel like I'm more in control of what I'm doing than I used to be. It's not like I'm just waiting for something to happen. I'm starting to understand what I'm doing. I used to be, how should I put it…… I was trying to feel something in the darkness, or rather, I was searching for what to do in the darkness. I think cool sounds and cool songs came out of that. But now…… Everything is much more direct and well intentioned.」

● I love the song ‘Perfect Sonnet’ on that EP. Especially the part where your voice shakes and turns inside out and explodes into a shout - I've never heard such an intense expression of emotion. 「Oh…… I try not to rely too much on that kind of singing…… No, I think that a tiny whisper, for example, can convey just as much emotion as a loud, broken shout can. There are definitely some shouting on this album, but I think emotions are a very broad thing, and I think that up until now I've only been able to capture very, very extreme emotions. I've been able to shake off a lot of extreme emotions, such as despair, burnout, joy, and so on. But there are a lot of emotions in between. You can be perfectly depressed or insanely happy, and there are days when you don't feel either. People's emotions are more subtle, and that's what we're aiming for with the new songs we're writing. Of course, I like the feeling of being able to scream and let all the emotions out. But I want to be able to do more than that. I don't want to be able to express only one emotion. …… I want to be able to convey all sorts of grey emotions, not simply black and white.」

● Yeah, yeah. I think your songs express a strong longing for perfect love, happiness and joy, but at the same time, I feel like there is a fear of losing such joy and happiness. 「Ah…… You know, you're exactly right! That's the problem I have with myself, or…… That's a great description of the problems that come from my depression. I see things. I notice that there's something beautiful, and already at that moment I'm like, that beauty is going away, it's gone, it's turned into something ugly! That's how I feel. When I see something wonderful, the moment I see it, I think about the end. Everything seems like that…… I can't help thinking that, all my favourite friends, they're all lovely, but one day they're going to get old. I know that's the fate of all things, but everything changes…… But that's a great insight to realise that!」

● No…… (chuckles). 「Even though I've never met them (laughs).」

● Certainly (laughs). The words ‘Bright Eyes’ appear several times in your songs. What do these words symbolise? 「Yeah. Well, I can't remember the name…… Um, I used to watch an old film channel at my parents' house. It was a very long time ago, way before the first CD came out. Yeah, I really don't even remember the title of the film, but it was an old film with, like, Humphrey Bogart in it or something. And the main character calls out to a pretty girl, ‘Bright Eyes’. "Don't worry, pretty girl. You'll be on time for the train" or something like that. And I thought that was a nice way of expressing my fondness for the girl. So I wrote a song about it. I think it was the second song on an early compilation…… I wrote a couple of other songs using the words ‘Bright Eyes’ before I decided on the band name. I think that word has everything I love in it, like beauty, youth and…… When you look into someone's eyes, they are full of life…… I think that's the image. I think it's the most wonderful thing in the world. I think that's where it comes from.」

"I think everyone is thinking, I want to leave my mark on something."

(MUSE/Matt Bellamy)

● What impact did your first encounter with music have on your life? 「I started playing piano when I was 8 or 9. I liked Ray Charles and that kind of boogie-woogie piano. I didn't learn at first, I just listened to records and imitated what I heard. Then, when I was 12 or 13, I started playing guitar. I was influenced by British indie bands like Sonic Youth and stuff like that. But until I was 16 or 17, I couldn't make up my mind whether I was going to be serious about being in a band or going to university. So I spent four or five months travelling around Europe with my acoustic guitar and I learnt a lot of different guitar playing techniques. Flamenco, traditional Italian, and Greek guitar. It was totally different from what I had been playing. So when I came back from the trip, I had a lot of new ideas. So I think that was probably my biggest musical encounter.」

● I see. This is reflected in the variety of songs on this album. You say that Nirvana's 'Nevermind' and Radiohead's 'The Bends' are your favourite albums, but you must have been 13 or 14 when you listened to those two albums. 「Yeah, that one. Well, I just wanted to say that those two albums are two classics of the 90s. And we're an extension of the succession of bands like that. They were the successors of bands like the [Sex] Pistols and the Smiths and Echo Bunny [aka Echo & the Bunnymen], and even further back, the Beatles and [Elvis] Presley. In R&R [rock n' roll], everything is inherited and evolves, and we are the new generation in that. We're just ten years younger than Nirvana and Radiohead.」

● You can feel the change in the generation. The album was produced by John Leckie. Did working with him bring new inspiration to Muse's music? 「He helped us a lot with setting up the environment and where to record. It's about creating the right atmosphere for each song. He didn't have any input into the songwriting. I think the biggest thing he's given me is the Radiohead comparisons (laughs).」

● (laughs) It's an unavoidable part of the process. What do you yourself think about that comparison? 「Um…… It's fine, isn't it? Hahaha. Because, as I said before, everything originates from somewhere and can be traced all the way back. In the end, I think it all starts from the moment a musician wants to communicate their feelings and their situation. In that sense, we have something in common with Radiohead and the other bands I mentioned earlier. We want to express what we feel as people born and raised in this era.」

● I see. So, the town you grew up in, Teignmouth, seems to be a beautiful seaside town that attracts people in the summer as a resort. Was it ‘dead’ so to speak? 「No, it's not that bad, but it's just a bit boring. There's not much to do. But I'm sure there are many, many, many other towns like that. I'm sure lots of people live a similar life. But when we moved to that town, we were 13 or 14, and of course we looked around for something interesting to do, but there was nothing, except watching TV. That's when we started playing music, and we formed a band and started rehearsing and so on. We're a bit fed up with the town because every time we go into town we get into fights. There were people who didn't like us. All I remember is violence, and I don't like it. At first glance, it looks like a peaceful town, but whenever I go out at night, I get the stink eye.」

● Is it because you're a young guy who thinks he's an artist playing in a band? 「Hahahaha! That's exactly right.」

● (laughs) Muse's music has an excessive amount of emotion and passion. What is it that drives you to create such intense music? 「I think everyone wants to express what they feel, to be understood or misunderstood by others, and in any case to leave some kind of mark. That we are here, and that we are feeling this way. I think it's part of human evolution. Whether it's art, science, or contributing to the maintenance of the system by raising children. So I think what we are doing is talking about the system and how it affects us, for better or for worse. There is a significant element of the absence of religion. Our generation is one that has grown up without a specific religion, and everyone implicitly accepts the media and television as a way of connecting with others. Part of the album is about whether that's a good thing or a bad thing, and whether technological advances are destroying us or liberating us. It's something I myself don't know the answer to.」

● I see. And you have a beautiful falsetto voice— 「Uhuhuhuhu……….」

● You don't have to be so shy (laughs). Despite this, the words you sing are harsh and sometimes even challenging. 「Yeah, yeah.」

● By releasing the darker, self-destructive side of yourself into your music— 「Eheheheheh.」

● (laughs) Do you feel like you're sort of redeemed by letting go? 「Yeah, I think the first album was definitely like that. You go deep into yourself and look at the dark side and the good side and express that. But if you succeed by expressing yourself openly like that, there's a danger. You think that if you don't do that all the time, you won't be able to go on. And then the next work goes deeper and darker. But I don't want to do that. I think it's important to know other people's emotions, not just your own, and sometimes you need to become someone else's character and express yourself from their point of view. It's dangerous to be too focused on yourself, I think it's important to look outside the cocoon that is you.」

● Yes, that's very perceptive. I'm really looking forward to the gig in March, as the live show is highly acclaimed. So, do you have a message for Japanese listeners? 「What message? Oh, hahaha… Well, the album alone is only half of us. The other half is our live shows. So if you see us live, you'll get the whole picture. I would also like to say that the message itself is all in the music.」

☆ The weeping acolytes Bright Eyes and the rising star Muse, who twist and turn on the opposite emotions. The magazine's acclaimed Hope are all coming to Japan! Bright Eyes is an in-store gig. It's a free event, so please feel free to attend. Muse's Japan show is a ticket-purchase event! We will be inviting 10 groups of 20 people, so please apply using the enclosed postcard (must arrive no later than Wednesday 16 February). This is your chance to experience first-hand their sound, which marks a moment in time that will never come again. Don't miss it!!!

Translator's Note: Was it necessary for me to translate the Bright Eyes interview? Not really. But since the article was covering both bands and I've already scanned and extracted the texts, I thought I might as well just do it anyways. It gives a nice compare and contrast about Conor and Matt.

#Conor Oberst #Bright Eyes #Every Day and Every Night era #Matt Bellamy #Muse #Muse band #Showbiz era #smol meerkat #my scan #translation #interview #ROCKIN'ON #ROCKIN'ON March 2000

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localshe · 1 month ago

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𖥔 ࣪˖ um, who’s this?

ANALIA! — fifteen. she/her. infp. polyglot af (🇲🇽 🇫🇷🇺🇸) big enthusiast/adoration for the wbb community, especially kate martin :D

haaaai guys! i’m analia, a new writer. some small facts about me—i speak three different languages: spanish, english and french. i love taking pics of anything i find aesthetically pleasing and i write smut / headcannons more :]

this is my only account . . inspo from vegas! here are more things about me (basically a bio just extended version)

LIKES! sunsets, music, rings, jarritos, sugar cookies, memes, cliffhangers, early noon showers, butterflies, dogs, sleep, my speakerrrrr, the moon, winter/fall/xmas, and of course women.

DISLIKES! summer, cold showers, wet socks, migraines, procrastination, writer’s block.

HOBBIES! writing, dance, quality time with my fam, volleyball, read poems, cook, shopping, babysitting…, and study art because i dabble in it yk

SERIES I <3! gilmore girls, shameless, grey’s anatomy, you, suits, bridgerton, good girls, lucifer, blue state mountain, sex ed, love is blind, elite, 13 reasons why, g&g, baby, surviving summer, spinning out, the queen’s gambit, tiny pretty things.

MUSIC TASTE! the beatles, $b, sufjan stevens, partynextdoor, the nbhd, mac demarco, 070 shake, jeff buckley, j. cole, genshin, young miko, isaiah rashad, sza, lorde, charli xcx, the marías, billie eilish, boygenius, hotel ugly, clairo, etc.

FAV MOVIES! the notebook, after (+2/3/4), the mortal instruments, through my windows, the conjuring, call me by your name, gran turismo, the tearsmith, mean girls, etc.

SELFSHIPS! analia & kate = #kanalia . . caitlin & analia = #caitlia kk arnold & analia = #liaarnold ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏~♡

𓍯

#about me.#caitlin clark #new writer #wbb #fan fiction #kate martin fic #wnba basketball #kate martin

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theupsidedownsrealestateagent · 1 year ago

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Robin lying on the carpeted floor of her bedroom playing with one of the fraying ends of her comforter. Steve sat next to her trying to catch her eye, which she has been expertly avoiding for the past forty five minutes. It wasn’t until Steve grabbed her hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze, that Robin finally looked at her friend.

“I’m scared Steve. This could go absolutely horrible.”

Steve gives a small hum indicating he was thinking hard, one of those Steve noises Robin has perfected as if it was another language she was studying. In a way it is she thinks to herself. “It’s okay to be scared,” he says after a beat. “I’m scared and it’s not even my parents. And if you don’t want to do this right now or ever, we don’t have to. We can back out right now, and enact Plan B.”

Robin gives a sarcastic snort, “Plan B is grabbing Nancy and Eddie, fleeing to Chicago and living out of your boyfriend’s van until we freeze to death.”

“I’d make it work, I’d do anything to keep you safe you know this babe.”

She sighs and rolls her eyes affectionately, “Yeah yeah ditto dingus.” She playfully shoves his shoulder and squirms as he turns the shove into an aggressive hug.

“No matter what we’ll be okay.” He smacks a kiss on her head.

“Let's do this,” Robin breathes out.

Robin had been sitting in this same seat for the past fourteen years give or take, eating dinner, agonizing over math homework, and having a million pointless conversations with her parents. Tonight the familiarity of a family dinner table was shriveled up and dead. From today on their family would never be the same. There would be the extra unsaid barrier between them. And that was best case scenario. Worst case scenario this would be the last dinner she’d ever have in this house, hell probably in the whole town. The thought made her stomach sink, she pushed her peas around her plate. Every bite she took tasted like flavorless mush. She chanced a glance at Steve, if she didn’t know him she would think he was acting perfectly normal, but she did know him. Better than anyone. She could tell how he was almost as nervous as she was. His shoulders tense, smile tight, and his hands had the slightest tremor, Robin gave his knee a squeeze in solidarity.

“Mom, dad, I– we. We have something to tell you.” Robin shakily revelas. In an instant she can feel her parents eyes, going back and forth between her and Steve, small smiles tugging at their lips. She’s going to be sick.

“Oh?” Her mom asks, wiggling her eyebrows and bringing the glass of cheap red wine to her lips. “I think we have an inclination, don’t we Rich?”

“Mom no, it’s not like that, actually I mean it is but not in the way you guys think– Okay, so– Oh my god okay I’m just going to say this. And please wait until we’re done to ask or say anything. Please don’t hate me.” Fuck why are there tears falling from her face? Robin had promised herself she wasn’t going to cry through this.

“Oh sweetheart, there’s nothing you could say that would make us hate you. You’re our little bird.” Her dad softly said, reaching across the table to give her a reassuring touch, until he saw her flinch away. Hurt flashed in his own eyes, before tucking his hands back by his side.

Her mom looks nervous now, and nearly breathlessly asks, “Robin Buckley you aren’t pregnant are you?”

Steve nearly chokes, Robin’s eyes are wide and now as big as plates, her mouth gapes open looking to Steve, wondering what the hell she was going to say to that accusation. She settles on the articulate, “Jesus Christ, Mom unless God themself has chosen me to be the bearer of their next miracle child or whatever that’s not even in the realm of possibilities. Maybe it's a possibility you guys would prefer to the actual truth but alas I am not with child. I’m just. I’m– Fuck! I’m gay okay? Just gay. That’s my big terrible secret, and why Steve and I aren’t dating, well except we are but we aren’t.” Tears are flowing down her face now, she can hardly even make out the shape of her parents, she’s just realizing how tight Steve is squeezing her hand now. That grounding pressure is enough for her to be able to clear her watery eyes, and get a good look at her parents’ facial reactions.

And huh, that wasn’t what she expected. They were…calm? Small, almost shy smiles. What the hell? Where was the yelling, the hatred, anything? Robin had expected nearly every reaction but this one. If it wasn’t for Steve’s continuous pressure in her hand, she’d be sure she was hallucinating.

It was her mom who broke the silence first, “Oh Robby.” She says with a sad sort of pity. “It’s okay baby. Dad and I would never, ever, hate you for who you love. Robin Lynn Buckley, I mean what kind of parents are we that you didn’t trust us to tell us this?”

“It’s not like that mom. It’s not you I guess, it’s like society. Society tells us we’re broken, and disgusting, I couldn’t mom, I couldn’t tell you guys and be completely one hundred and ten percent sure I’d still have a roof over my head if things went wrong.” Robin lets out an exhausted sigh. Her mother does this, makes everything about herself even when she means well. And the fact that she does mean well about her only daughter being a dyke, then she certainly isn’t going to point that out to her mom in this moment. It’s too monumental for a potentially petty argument. Which leads her to her next question, “So what? You and dad are just fine with it? No questions? Completely parent approved?”

It was her dad who piped up next. Good ole Richard Buckley known for his poise and tact, “Well actually I do have some questions. What does that mean, you and Steve are dating but also aren’t? That doesn’t seem conducive to your lifestyle.” Of course he’d say lifestyle, it's those tiny phrases like that, where Robin knows deep in her soul her dad knows it isn’t a choice, but lacks the verbiage to fully get it. She smiles at that a little, her parents are cool, but at the end of the day, they’re still her straight, old, lame parents they’ve always been.

Wait, her dad definitely asked her a question that she absolutely does not remember. Right as she started floundering a half assed non answer, Steve was talking. Oh she could kiss him, but she’s pretty sure she’d be sending her parents even more mixed signals. “Robin and I are not dating, and obviously we never would. We love each other though, more than anything, and I hope you know by now I’d do anything to keep her safe– ‘

“And I’d do anything to keep Steve safe,” Robin interjects. Not necessarily for her parents’ benefit, but because she knows that Steve should hear that this dynamic goes both ways as often as possible. And she’s glad she said something, because the bright, adoring look on his face is enough to calm her twisted guts, just a smidge.

Steve continues, “So no we aren’t dating, but to the general public we will be. Just to make it look like we are deemed acceptable to society. My partner is doing the same thing with one of our other friends.”

One of our other friends. That phrase sits in Robin like a giant slab of cement. Nancy Wheeler is so much more than another one of their friends. Steve had just been so brave then admitting he had a partner first, and she’s eternally grateful he didn’t up and say she has a girlfriend it has to be her to say it. “My partner actually, Steve’s boyfriend is pretending to date my girlfriend.

“Jesus, how many queer kids are there in Hawkins?”

Steve laughed earnestly, “I think Hawkins might be the most gay town in America. That’s why Reagan won’t visit.” Which in turn makes Richard Buckley laugh. Robin thinks not for the first time in their friendship, having their dad’s be so completely different with the same name, only adds to her and Steve’s soulmatism.

“Nancy?” Her mom asks apropos fucking nothing! “Is that the girl you’re going steady with?”

“H– How did you know that?” Robin sputters.

“Honey I mean now that, that I know it’s kinda. Not obvious! But the subtle signs are there. You look at Nancy the same way Aunt Anita looks at Aunt Rachel.” She says simply, as if that means anything.

“Why would Aunt Anita’s roommate–” The realization hits Robin like a Russian soldier with a mean slap. “Oh my god! I’m the most oblivious person on the planet, and I know Michael Wheeler!” Steve barks out a surprised laugh at that.

“You really didn’t know?” Her father asks with amusements written all over his stupid face. “I’ve known about my sister since we were in elementary school Birdie and I never loved her any less. Just like I’ll never love you any less and Steve for that matter. You kids are safe with us always, although you and Miss Wheeler are no longer permitted to sleepovers, unless one of you takes the couch.”

Well that was an unexpected side effect she hadn’t considered before, but she’ll take it, and just shrugs in agreement.

“Now son,” And Rich turns to Steve. “I know your folks aren’t the” he pauses and Robin knows he’s looking for the right words not to scare Steve off, “aren’t the most open minded, so I’ll say two things that I hope you listen to. First, please know that you always, always have a home here in case you need it, and honestly if I had it my way you��d already be sharing Robin’s room.” Steve nods his head at her dad, and she can tell if he were to say anything it would probably come out a little wobbly, then her dad continues and the mood sombers, “And secondly.” He takes a deep breath, “It’s a scary time for you boys right now, I know you know that, but Steve we love you like you’re our own little Buckley, just be safe and smart. Okay?”

Steve nods again more firmly this time, and lets out a quiet, “Okay.”

So that’s it. Robin and Steve are both out to her parents. They know about Nancy. This isn’t some Upside Down science/magic? Now that she thinks about it she never got the rundown on how all of that works, and frankly as long as it stays gone, she’d rather not think about it.

***

After their emotional conversation, the dinner went back to being business as usual. As if nothing changed, and in so many ways it didn’t, but it felt a little off, there was a little less pressure sitting tight in her chest. She felt loose in a way she hadn’t in years with her parents. And to top it off they were able to convince her parents to skip out on their weekly movie night, so they could be with Nancy and Eddie.

Nancy and Eddie had decided to wait for them at Steve’s house, either to relax, or to better be prepared if they had to ditch town. They were both crowding the door right as Steve pushed it open. Eddie was bouncing his feet, and twisting his hair, while Nancy was putting on a brave face, but Robin caught her tapping her foot with pent up anxiety. So they told them everything.

Eddie sags with relief, and before she can even look at Nancy to gauge her reaction, she’s being enveloped in a tight and somehow tender hug. Nancy starts whispering praise into her ear. Robin’s legs go nearly weak at them. She lets Nancy take hold of her face, they are both beaming at each other, and then they’re kissing. Like really kissing. Nancy has her pushed back up against the closed front door, and Robin gets lost in it. Lost in the way Nancy perfume smells, in the way her lips are a little bit chapped from nervously chewing on them tonight, lost in the way she was completely, head over heels in love with Nancy Edith Wheeler.

They break apart, and Robin notices thankfully they’re alone. Doesn’t matter much when Eddie yells from the kitchen, “If you two degenerates are done fornicating in the foyer you’re more than welcome to some cheesecake and wine.” Robin hears a dull oof come from the kitchen and she knows Steve smacked him in the chest.

Nancy scoff’s and starts walking to the kitchen, “You’re one to talk Munson, hands where I can see them, and not stuck to Steve’s ass all night.”

Robin sees Steve’s eyebrow shoot up knowing that this now is a competition they all need to destroy each other in, and that’s when Robin knows that they’re going to be okay.

#platonic stobin #robin buckly #my writing #stranger things #background steddie #background ronance #cross posted on ao3

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compneuropapers · 2 months ago

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Interesting Papers for Week 40, 2024

Impact of Extracellular Current Flow on Action Potential Propagation in Myelinated Axons. Abdollahi, N., & Prescott, S. A. (2024). Journal of Neuroscience, 44(26), e0569242024.

Prefrontal coding of learned and inferred knowledge during REM and NREM sleep. Abdou, K., Nomoto, M., Aly, M. H., Ibrahim, A. Z., Choko, K., Okubo-Suzuki, R., … Inokuchi, K. (2024). Nature Communications, 15, 4566.

Distinct basal ganglia contributions to learning from implicit and explicit value signals in perceptual decision-making. Balsdon, T., Pisauro, M. A., & Philiastides, M. G. (2024). Nature Communications, 15, 5317.

Hebbian priming of human motor learning. Bjørndal, J. R., Beck, M. M., Jespersen, L., Christiansen, L., & Lundbye-Jensen, J. (2024). Nature Communications, 15, 5126.

The well‐worn route revisited: Striatal and hippocampal system contributions to familiar route navigation. Buckley, M., McGregor, A., Ihssen, N., Austen, J., Thurlbeck, S., Smith, S. P., … Lew, A. R. (2024). Hippocampus, 34(7), 310–326.

Ouvrai opens access to remote virtual reality studies of human behavioural neuroscience. Cesanek, E., Shivkumar, S., Ingram, J. N., & Wolpert, D. M. (2024). Nature Human Behaviour, 8(6), 1209–1224.

Two distinct networks for encoding goals and forms of action: An effective connectivity study. Di Cesare, G., Lombardi, G., Zeidman, P., Urgen, B. A., Sciutti, A., Friston, K. J., & Rizzolatti, G. (2024). Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 121(26), e2402282121.

Conductance-based dendrites perform Bayes-optimal cue integration. Jordan, J., Sacramento, J., Wybo, W. A. M., Petrovici, M. A., & Senn, W. (2024). PLOS Computational Biology, 20(6), e1012047.

Subpopulations of neurons in the perirhinal cortex enable both modality-specific and modality-invariant recognition of objects. Lim, H.-Y., & Lee, I. (2024). PLOS Biology, 22(6), e3002713.

Hippocampal and orbitofrontal neurons contribute to complementary aspects of associative structure. Lin, H., & Zhou, J. (2024). Nature Communications, 15, 5283.

A vast space of compact strategies for effective decisions. Ma, T., & Hermundstad, A. M. (2024). Science Advances, 10(25).

The direction of theta and alpha travelling waves modulates human memory processing. Mohan, U. R., Zhang, H., Ermentrout, B., & Jacobs, J. (2024). Nature Human Behaviour, 8(6), 1124–1135.

Mental navigation in the primate entorhinal cortex. Neupane, S., Fiete, I., & Jazayeri, M. (2024). Nature, 630(8017), 704–711.

Low and high beta rhythms have different motor cortical sources and distinct roles in movement control and spatiotemporal attention. Nougaret, S., López-Galdo, L., Caytan, E., Poitreau, J., Barthélemy, F. V., & Kilavik, B. E. (2024). PLOS Biology, 22(6), e3002670.

Striatal Dopamine Contributions to Skilled Motor Learning. Phillips, C. D., Hodge, A. T., Myers, C. C., Leventhal, D. K., & Burgess, C. R. (2024). Journal of Neuroscience, 44(26), e0240242024.

Visuo-motor updating in individuals with heightened autistic traits. Pomè, A., & Zimmermann, E. (2024). eLife, 13, e94946.3.

Spindle-locked ripples mediate memory reactivation during human NREM sleep. Schreiner, T., Griffiths, B. J., Kutlu, M., Vollmar, C., Kaufmann, E., Quach, S., … Staudigl, T. (2024). Nature Communications, 15, 5249.

Disruption of dopamine D2/D3 system function impairs the human ability to understand the mental states of other people. Schuster, B. A., Sowden, S., Rybicki, A. J., Fraser, D. S., Press, C., Hickman, L., … Cook, J. L. (2024). PLOS Biology, 22(6), e3002652.

A prefrontal motor circuit initiates persistent movement. Wang, Y., & Sun, Q.-Q. (2024). Nature Communications, 15, 5264.

Decomposition of an odorant in olfactory perception and neural representation. Ye, Y., Wang, Y., Zhuang, Y., Tan, H., Zuo, Z., Yun, H., … Zhou, W. (2024). Nature Human Behaviour, 8(6), 1150–1162.

#neuroscience #science #research #brain science #scientific publications #cognitive science #neurobiology #cognition #psychophysics #neurons #neural computation #neural networks #computational neuroscience

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surviveds · 7 months ago

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buck adopts a fifteen year old named ivy just a few months before the lightning strike. their father dies on a call and the only other family they have is a transphobic grandmother who isn't even in a position to take care of a child because of her health, so bobby and hen help buck arrange for them to stay with him, temporarily at first... but they bond, of course, and buck ends up becoming their official foster parent.

#immediately dies for 3 minutes after this. great parenting #(i have to bully him. sorry)#anyway. he's getting another kid too. but i'm still working out those details #ivy's gonna exist in all universes because i love them and so does buck. he's shifting into dad mode #ch: b. buckley.#study: b. buckley.

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ofgods · 3 months ago

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𝐀𝐔𝐑𝐄𝐀 𝐒𝐎𝐔𝐙𝐀, a character study.

b-rabbit, 8 mile ( movie ) ― hard-working, ambitious, loyal.

❝ i'm gonna do it on my own. ❞

heloise, portrait of a lady on fire ( movie ) ― tortured, but loving. breaking, but ultimately hopeful.

❝ not everything is fleeting, some feelings are deep. ❞

maeve wiley, sex education ( tv show ) ― intelligent, bold, sarcastic, & generally keeps to herself. has a harsh & mean exterior, but is a kind soul who likes to help others in need.

❝ i'm shit at asking for help and i push people away. ❞

tiffany maxwell, silver linings playbook ( movie ) ― strong, quirky, crazy with a rough exterior due to her past.

❝ there will always be a part of me that is sloppy and dirty, but i like that, just like all the other parts of myself. ❞

wanda maximoff, marvel universe ( comics/movies ) ― introverted, caring, & fights for what she thinks is right. very passionate about her beliefs, but is also prone to impulsiveness. feels the burden and guilt of her actions, which has led to times of inaction.

❝ i don't need you to tell me who i am. ❞

sirius black, harry potter ( books/movies ) ― true-hearted, brave, loyal, arrogant, mischievous, and is capable of an explosive temper when angered.

❝ personally, i would've welcomed a dementor attack. a deadly struggle for my soul would've broken the monotony nicely. ❞

fox mulder, x-files ( tv show ) ― enthusiastic & interested in the paranormal. overprotective of loved ones, even to the point of violence.

❝ i want to believe. ❞

jughead jones, riverdale ( tv show ) ― darkly humourous, apathetic, a quick temper. is loyal, nice, and caring when friends are involved. protective over passions.

❝ just in case you didn't know, i'm a weirdo. i don't fit in, and i don't want to fit in. ❞

noah calhoun, the notebook ( book/movie ) ― sophisticated, sensitive, perceptive, passionate, & doesn't give up easily.

❝ if you're a bird, i'm a bird. ❞

robin buckley, stranger things ( tv show ) ― sarcastic, realistic, speaks her truth, cynical but wants to be accepted for who she is, compassionate, & hyper ( once she's grown comfortable ).

❝ we all die, my strange little child friend. ❞

#📚． 𝖲𝖮𝖴𝖹𝖠 ， 𝒂𝒖𝒓𝒆𝒂 ↺ tasks.#bhqtask003 #death mention tw #if i have a chance to do a graphic yall know i will 😔#template in source; but pls know it's a paid one <3

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taytrashmouth · 1 year ago

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Prompts and requests!!!

Okay so requests are open so keep sending them in!!! Here are some prompts, and characters I write for, let me know what you want to see next.

you can send in original ideas too!

Send requests with the prompt and the character you want to see it with.

Prompts:

1. “You’re being all cute and sweet and it’s making me want to kiss you.”

2. “You said you liked _____, like a month ago so I bought it for you.”

3. “Can I braid your hair!?” “Absolutely not.” “Pleeeeeassse” ends up braiding their hair.

4. “Who did this to you?”

5. “You don’t deserve someone like that.”

6. “Are you jealous?”

7. Reunited after a war

8. Taking care of each other when they’re sick

9. “Please don’t cry.”

10. “Did you just lick me?”

11. “Say the words and I’m yours.”

12. “Do you ever miss us?”

13. “Just….please, h-hold my hand for a bit. I’m scared.”

14. Slow dancing by a fire.

15. “If even half that blood is yours, you need to sit down.”

16. Trying to study but they keep distracting you

17. Cuddling on the couch for the first time, every touch is electric, it’s awkward it’s new, etc.

18. Person B discovering person A has been abused in the past.

19. Person B is insecure about their scars, person A makes them feel better about this.

20. Sunshine x black cat

21. “I trust you.”

22. “You’re staring!”

23. “I like seeing you happy.”

24. They kiss “I’ve been waiting to do that for ____ years.”

25. “Are you nervous?”

26. “Are you cold?” “No.” Gives them their jacket anyway.

27. “You are everything to me! Don’t you see that!?”

28. “You told me you were okay! You promised!”

29. “Where did you get those bruises?”

30. “You should’ve been here! With me!”

31. “I love you!��

32. “Wait!…..stay.”

33. “I want to stop loving you but I can’t! I close my eyes and all I dream about is you!”

34. “As you wish.”

35. “Goodbye.” They whisper with tears in their eyes and a cracking voice.

36. “Are you up?”

38. Watches their lover die

39. “You’re more than a one night stand….you know that.”

40. “Why can’t you just love me back?!”

41. “Letting you go was the hardest thing I have ever had to do.”

42. “Can’t you see that I’m trying?”

43. “How long?”

44. “Look me in the eye and tell me you never loved me…say it!”

45. “You still have sleepy stuff in your eyes.”

46. “Okay sleeping beauty it’s bedtime, I’ve got you.”

47. “You smell nice.”

48. Tickling each other

49. “If I could hold you in public I don’t think I’d ever let go.”

50. “God here- just hold my hand.”

51. Person A “Well you could-“

Person B “if you suggest I sit in your lap I’ll hit you.”

Franchises I write for:

Stranger things

Game of thrones

Friends

The summer I turned pretty

Harry Potter

The last of us

Marvel

I am not okay with this

Outer banks

Kingsman

Heartstopper

That 70s show

The hunger games

Buffy the vampire slayer

(I will write for any character from the above franchises)

Characters I love to write:

(To give you some ideas)

Steve Harrington

Eddie Munson

Max mayfield

Robin Buckley

Robb stark

Jon snow

Chandler Bing

Jeremiah fisher

Harry Potter

Hermione granger

The Weasley twins

Richie Tozier

Beverly marsh

Joel miller

Ellie Williams

Thor

Captain America

Peter Parker/ Spider-Man

Peter quill

Stanley barber

JJ Maybank

Eggsy

Nick Nelson

Eric foreman

Micheal kelso

Steven Hyde

Peeta Mellark

Spike

Angel

Feel free to send in requests without prompts too!

I am open to writing for ships within those franchises too!!

Can’t wait to write!!!!! Send in those requests!!!!

Love to anyone who reads my work❤️

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johanna-swann · 7 months ago

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Did anybody else find this episode a little... Idk, underwhelming? Too simple? Because of course there were parts I liked and enjoyed very much, but I also felt like a lot of it fell flat. Maybe it's just that we already new a lot going in and that it was veeeery predictable, but still. In parts, it felt almost like a character study.

The first couple of minutes were pretty fun. With the bachelor party, Chim not wanting a bachelor party and Buck and Eddie going "well screw what he wants, we're having a party!". I didn't mind that this part was relatively short either, it just served as a little fun moment and as an introduction to the main conflict of the episode.

[On a side note: I feel like they're leaning heavily into Buck being an awkward mess this season. He has always been impulsive and doesn't always think before he speaks, but the second-hand embarrassment levels are off the charts this season. Might be just a me thing though, idk.]

Anyway. Once they realise that Chimney is missing, the reason behind his disappearance is cleared up quickly. It's not particularly mysterious or dramatic or complicated (he has a fever and got disoriented) and then nothing much happens anymore?

We see the other characters looking for him, but aside from a very small scene were Maddie worries she put to much pressure on this wedding there's not much emotion here? They're all very pragmatic about it, it feels like just another day on the job.

Meanwhile Chimney has some more hallucinations while wandering about. Tbh, I hate that they brought Doug back. What was the purpose behind this? He's been dead for five years, Maddie has been in therapy about it and Chimney dealt with his feelings about Maddie's first marriage last season before he proposed. Just. Why?

The actual wedding at the end also only takes up about 6 minutes. This part, again, is kinda sweet. Very much predictable though.

In general, not a single surprising thing happened in this episode (aside from Doug). We knew Chim would disappear. We knew the wedding wouldn't go down as planned and that it was probably gonna end in a smaller impromptu ceremony. We knew Buck would come out to the rest of the team, but that it wouldn't be a big deal. We knew that Madney still would get married this episode. We knew there was going to be a happy ending.

So yeah. There is an entire half hour in the middle of the episode where barely anything happens. We don't see the other main characters' feelings about their missing friend. There's not B- or C-plot drama with the Buckley parents or Chimney's father or anything. It's really just Chimney stumbling about and the others looking for him.

Which, as I mentioned, made this episode feel like a character study on Chimney. Even Maddie didn't have much to do this episode. I think maybe a lot of the emotional impact got lost in editing, they had to cut like 30 minutes of screentime off of 7x06?

TL;DR: Despite some rather heartwarming scenes, the plot felt very thin for an episode that was promoted as this huge mid-season event, the wedding we've been waiting for, especially because we waited 3 weeks for it instead of just 1.

Now, before I just send out all these sceptical, negative thoughts, here some things I really liked:

The Lees were such an important part of this episode. They are Chimney's family, he grew up with them, they're home. The importance of found family has been dying down a little bit during the recent seasons (Eddie trying to be better with his parents, the Buckley parents showing up more, even Chim's father is somewhat forgiven his shortcomings). But the Lees rightfully got their screentime here.

I do like that they establish how Chim's little adventure had nothing to do with the bachelor party. It's not that Buck and Eddie irresponsibly lost the groom, it's completely unrelated.

The coming out was also a little underwhelming, but then again this was Madney's episode and who knows, maybe they'll follow up on this at a later point.

Bobby officiating the wedding with their entire family huddled into that one hospital room was really sweet.

Chimney triaging that emergency was so cool. That's just who Chimney is at his core, even when he's hallucinating and thinks it's 2004.

#911 spoilers #911 abc #911 7x06 #long post

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panickinganakin · 1 year ago

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stepping stones to hell ch.2 (ronance fic)

a/n: hello! this is chapter two of the fic. you can find chapter one here!

word count: 2,709

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

The venue they were playing tonight was actually the venue they had played the most. Chicago was a pretty close drive from Hawkins so this was practically a hometown show for them. The crowds here were always rowdy, just how the band liked them.

She took the familiar back entrance following Steve. “They should be set up in dressing room B, I’ll walk you there but I’ll leave you. I don’t want to invade the space.”

Robin scratched at her arm nervously then pulled her hand away quickly. Eddie had put a fishnet top on her underneath her shirt. The material stretched all the way down her arms with a hole in the fabric that her thumbs slipped through. He had also put her in baggy charcoal cargo shorts and a crop top that he had cut himself from a Ozzy shirt.

For accessories he had loaned her a large black belt full of silver ringlet holes and a long chain necklace. She had chosen to stick with her red converse but did let Eddie put eyeliner on her and curl her hair.

Though it wasn’t her typical look she felt good. She had starred in the mirror for a long time and she knew she looked great but she still felt nervous.

“You’re gonna do great. This is a good thing. You’re always saying that feminism is important to you. This is your job and you have a platform. They are your conduit to the public. Just be yourself.” Steve offered kindly before knocking on the door.

He waved her off as a woman with curly dark hair smiled. “Robin! Hello, my name is Lyla. Come in.”

Robin followed behind her and looked around the room. There was a table filled with different snacks and drinks. On the far left of the room there was a large beige backdrop with lights facing it. Okay, so, there would be photos.

“Help yourself to snacks, you can meet us right over there at the table. We are gonna do questions first then end with photos. Any questions?”

Robin shook her head nervously, “No I think I’m okay, thanks.”

Robin skimmed over the table, taking a small paper plate and placing a few grapes on top. There were also small pinwheels that, though she was unsure of what deli meat was on it, she took a few of. Grabbing a can of soda at the end of the table, she headed for the back of the room.

As Robin approached the table there was a woman facing the opposite direction reading over what looked to be a notepad. Her curly hair was cut a little past her ear and the woman almost seemed familiar.

She rounded the table, “Hello,” she said, trying to not sound awkward. “I’m Robin Buckley.”

The woman looked up and a grin cracked across her face. Robin was surprised to see that the woman was Nancy Wheeler. Eddie’s comments on the bus earlier now made sense. “Nancy?”

She nodded excitedly, “Hey! How’ve you been?”

“Uhm, I’ve been good. Busy. But good, actually. How’ve you been?” Robin sipped at the can of coke. Nancy nearly looked the same as she did when they were younger with the exception of a few blonde highlights through her hair. She was wearing a deep plum lipstick and a light pink eyeshadow. Robin couldn’t see what her whole outfit was but she thought the cream colored blouse looked good on her. She looked good. Extremely good.

Nancy smiled and nodded, “Me too. I, uh, well. I finished school at Emory and worked for a paper for a long while. I was really sick of the lack of women around me, ya know? It was the same thing when I interned at Hawkins. It’s like the men are so big headed and rude. Even with a degree they were sending me around like an errand girl.”

“Men are the worst,” Robin said cooley. “How did you end up working with the magazine?”

Her eyes lit up like she was happy to talk about her job. “Well, I did my studying. I started reading all types of different papers and magazines that were local. I would pick out articles by women or the photographers and I started sending out letters. We had a big dinner party and well-'' she paused to motion her hands around the room. “We all decided to work together. Thus, we were born.”

Robin was impressed by Nancy. Proud, even. She could vaguely remember Nancy making comments when they had done research on Victor about how horrible the Hawkins Post was. Not only that Robin knew first hand what she meant. Though Robin was content in staying silent in interviews by choice didn’t mean she hadn’t been silenced before. When the band first signed the lawyers hadn’t even given her a packet to read over like they did for the men. Not only that but her pay was not even close to what the others were being signed on for.

Luckily she was in a group of guys who would never stand for that shit and Robin received her fair share. But, not all women had that. And that had to change.

“Nancy Wheeler, you have become a total badass.” Robin nudged her hand with her knuckle. It felt silly to say considering Robin had always been a badass.

Nancy’s cheeks turned rosy before she grinned, “I’m glad you agreed to this! The magazine is making it into a lot of hands these days but I think having an issue with you is really gonna make things take off. You guys have tons of fans and I’m really excited for women to see how much we matter.”

Robin nodded, “I'm glad you thought of me.”

“Oh, I think of you all the time.” She paused then shook her head, “I don’t think that came out right. I think of all of you a lot. You’re just so successful and are really out achieving dreams and-“ she stopped, her face now fully red. “Sorry.”

“It’s a nice thought, knowing what we’ve been through and that we still made it out. I always knew you’d become a writer and be successful too. I’m glad we made it, Wheeler.”

Nancy gave a big smile then grabbed her pen. “Right. Should we start? I have a couple different questions. All of these things may not make it to the article but I want to get enough to get in a good bit of stuff. When we’re done Lyla is gonna have you do some different poses and get some photos.”

“Sounds g-great,” Robin stumbled over her words. “I’ve never done an interview alone. So, hopefully this will go okay. I’m hoping I’m not absolutely miserable.”

“Just be yourself,” she took a sip from the red mug sitting in front of her.

“That’s exactly what Steve told me.”

“On the rare occasion, Steve is right,” she gave a joking wink then cleared her throat. “Right, let’s get to it then. So I think the easiest question would be; Corroded Coffin has risen to fame fairly quickly. Media shows a lot of the l rockstar life but not about the challenges of it. How do you feel working in this industry is? Do you feel you face other challenges your male counterparts do not?”

Robin blew out a breath, they were starting strong. “Well, I do think my job is very fun. I’m very lucky to get to play music and make a living out of it. I think every industry has its ups and downs but as a woman I do think things can be more difficult. Wages are a big issue. Obviously not just in music but everywhere. I’m very lucky to have a group of guys who constantly advocate for me. Though I do speak for myself, men are taken more seriously. When Corroded was signed I was offered a significant amount less to sign on. The guys wouldn’t accept it. We stayed at the meeting for over two hours negotiating my pay. I know this isn’t uncommon. Women are constantly being undermined. I’m glad that we are working for change.”

Robin knew her cheeks were red. She hardly ever spoke this much and when she did it was never serious. But, she had to admit it felt good to say these things. The way she had been treated was unfair.

Nancy had a small smile as she scribbled notes down with her pen quickly. She had a look about her that looked as if she were proud in the same way Robin was of her.

“How about the media itself? How does it treat you? Do you receive questions in interviews that the men do not?”

Robin let out a snort, “I have been asked many many things. I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve been asked who the most fuckable in the band is. Or who I have fucked or if I’ve fucked everyone. I’ve also had one guy tell the guys ‘how nice it was to have at least one woman on the road’.”

Nancy dropped her jaw in shock and paused on her writing, “See, this is exactly what I’m talking about!” Red patches formed on her neck and she ran her pen on the page angrily.

Those questions had always made Robin angry. It was bullshit for them to assume she was just the band's plaything. Not to mention she didn’t even like men. She wasn’t out publicly but…

Nancy pulled Robin out of her thoughts, and the two fell into a comfortable rhythm.

Talking to Nancy wasn’t hard; not like the other interviews were. It was easy and she was actually enjoying herself. Her and Nancy were never super close but she realized now how much she had missed the other woman. They had spent some time together while working on clearing Eddie’s name.

Truthfully, convincing everyone of Eddie’s innocence would have been a lot harder if it weren’t for Nancy. Nancy had compiled proof, evidence and testimonies of the kind of person he was and wrote a beautiful plea. Nancy had bypassed Hawkins Post completely and had sent it straight to the Indiana Times. The first week the article was page three but the following week it was reprinted as front page news.

Nancy was talented.

They went back and forth for what seemed at least an hour before Nancy bit the end of her pen. “Okay, I have one last question before photos can have you. Do you have any advice for your fans who dream of a future in music? Or just advice to anyone in general?”

Robin tilted her head, trying to think of something good to say. This article was going to be important. She needed to be honest and be real. If one person picked up the magazine and read her story and it inspired them, just one single person, that would be everything she could hope for. “Yes, I think I do. This is a man’s world. This industry, everything about it, is run by men. A lot of men don’t want to see you be successful. However, you have to stay true to yourself. Never stop fighting for what you believe is right, for what you know you deserve. It doesn’t matter if it’s your teacher, boss or some washed up Hollywood elite; never give up. Be you and be proud. Fuck, literally just be loud. They can’t hold us back forever. We are the backbone of entertainment and our time is now.”

Nancy looked up at Robin with the small smile she normally wore. “Perfect.”

“You think so? I worry I never say the right things,” Robin rubbed the back of her neck nervously. She was quickly feeling guilty, almost like an imposter. How could she tell readers to be themselves and be proud and she wouldn’t even come out to anyone outside of the band? She didn’t care what people thought about her or what they would say. She got over that before high school even finished. She didn’t care what her parents thought, they hardly ever talked. The people she cared about most knew. She knew her fans would still support her and the band no matter what. Eddie was gay for gods sake. There was just a fear that resided in Robin.

Maybe the article could be her being her actual true self. Maybe she could come out. “Ready?” Lyla stepped up to the table. Robin wanted to tell Nancy. It was important to her and she knew what representation could do. She hadn’t had it when she was young and she wished did.

She looked up and nodded quickly, “As I’ll ever be, I suppose.”

Nancy smiled at Robin before going back to focus on her notepad.

“I know you aren’t new to photo shoots. I’ll try to make this quick, they said you have about thirty minutes until soundcheck.”

Damn. Had her and Nancy really spent an hour and half talking?

“Okay, I love your outfit. Everything is perfect which means we’ll save time dressing. However, I really would love it if we could put a dark lip on you. Not because it’s necessary but because I think it’ll look so fucking good,” another woman said approaching her.

She had short red hair, chopped in a pixie cut. “Sure, do whatever,” Robin shrugged. The woman ushered her to a wooden stool before pulling a tube of lipstick from a rolling cart with various cosmetics and tools on it. “What’s your name?” She was trying to be friendly but also she didn’t like sitting in complete silence. Someone needed to be talking, even if it wasn’t her.

“Deliliah. And let me say, I’m a big fan. I was so excited when Nancy said she could get you in. This is probably the coolest feature we’ve ever done.”

Robin laughed quietly and shook her head, “I’m glad you guys are doing what you’re doing. A company fully owned and operated by women? That’s incredible. I was shocked Nancy even asked.”

Delilah used a brush to pick up the product before stepping close to Robin. She parted her lips slightly, hoping her breath didn’t smell like the mysterious pinwheels she had eaten. “Nancy said you guys are like childhood friends or something?”

Robin waited for her to finish applying the lipstick before she spoke. “Yeah, something like that. We went to school together and had mutual friends. I mean, we were friends just not like best best friends I guess you could say. Not because Nancy wasn’t great. She was great- is great,” Robin started to twist her rings nervously, she really hated how she rambled. It was a trait she detested most and had tried for years to stop.

“Nancy is great. She’s the best boss I’ve ever had. Stand up for me, I think I want to start with some pictures of you looking down at the camera. I’m going to bring it down here,” she pointed to a spot on the floor where there was a large ‘X’ in blue tape. After that I may have you sit down for a few and possibly lay down. We’ll just get a fair amount of options.

Robin took a deep breath, wishing she was doing this with the whole band and not alone. She had never been the photogenic type. Delilah squatted over the blue x then Lyla handed her the camera. “Alright. So why don’t bend over slightly as if you are going to look right into the lens. That way it’s a close up but we can still get a large view of your outfit. “Perfect!” she encouraged her before the flash went off.

“Now, use your hands to make a square like you’re looking through a lens now. Good, now take a step back and lean back down towards the camera. Great!” another flash of light.

Robin looked up and noticed Nancy standing a few steps behind Delilah. She had a huge smile on her face and held two thumbs up when she noticed Robin looking at her. Robin’s nerves relaxed finally; at least someone she knew was here.

#ronance #writing #fanfic #fanfiction #robin buckley #robin and nancy #robin buckley and nancy wheeler #the fruity four #fruity four #steddie #steddie confirmed #corroded coffin #nancy wheeler is a feminist badass #ronance fanfiction #ronance fic #stranger things #stranger things fanfiction

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cherrylng · 5 months ago

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Muse Archive [CROSSBEAT (November 2009)]

The definitive edition! The Muse Archive

Everything about Muse in keywords, columns and a timeline. Text by Sumi Imai

01 - Muse's musical background Muse was formed in Teignmouth, Devon, South West England. All three moved to the area when they were around ten years old and attended the same secondary school. Matthew first joined Dom's band around 1992, when he was in his mid-teens. Following its break-up, the two approached Chris and the prototype of Muse was born.

Teignmouth, on the south coast, is a holiday resort town, crowded with tourists in the summer months, but usually "a boring town with nothing going on" (Matthew). Physically separated from the big city scene, the three were baptised in grunge, but the Britpop wave never reached their hometown, and this environment worked to their advantage as they forged ahead on their independent rock path.

Their first show was in 1994. The sound at the time was Nirvana with a little bit of Rush-style progressive metal, and the melodies and harmonies were UK pop-punk (both Dom and Chris had done cover songs by Mega City Four and Senseless Things in their previous bands). Matthew's diverse tastes played a big part in the unique evolution that followed.

His roots are very varied: Jimi Hendrix and alternative metal (Primus, Rage) for guitar, folk (Jeff Buckley, Simon & Garfunkel) for melodies and singing, and experimental Anglo-American and European alternative (Deus, Sonic Youth) for a hunger for innovation. His roots in electronic music are diverse, including Aphex Twin.

The biggest factor that makes their musicality unique is the classical influence. Matthew returned to the piano at the end of his teenage years and gravitated towards Rachmaninoff, Chopin, and Liszt. He also studied Spanish guitar for a while, and his flexible attitude and rich background in folk music and folk songs form the basis of Muse's diverse and brilliant sound.

Pic: 'Rachmaninoff: Piano Concerto No. 3/Rhapsody on a Theme of Paganini, Op. 43' Vladimir Ashkenazy, Universal UCCD-3493. "The piano solo in the introduction to Rachmaninoff's Piano Concerto No 3 was a great influence on Butterflies and Hurricanes" (Matthew).

02 - The backgrounds and characters of the three members Matthew Bellamy was born in Cambridge, UK, in 1978. His father was the rhythm guitarist for The Tornados, who had an international hit (in 1962) with their mysterious space sounding single "Telstar", and became the first UK band to reach number one in the US and UK. Although he grew up in a musically privileged environment, his main instrument as a child was the piano. As well as classical music, he mainly preferred to play boogie-woogie/R&B, and only started playing guitar seriously when he was 14, when his parents divorced.

His mother, on the other hand, is a medium by blood and used to hold family séances when he was a child. Such experiences are the source of his interest in spirituality and science. He is also a thinker and reader, but he is not a liberal arts student and likes to exercise and fish. He is also surprisingly physical, having worked part-time as a painter, interior decorator, demolition worker and campsite cleaner.

He is usually a gentleman, a bit shy and quite mischievous. On stage, he gives it his all without fear, with the question of "what would I want to see if I were the audience?" in mind, and gives a performance so extreme that it is almost theatrical: "I want people to forget everything and just have fun".

Dom was born in Stockport, just outside Manchester. He is the same age as Matthew. He originally came to drumming from jazz. He likes to be organised and is somewhat stubborn when it comes to music. Loves Queen. During interviews, he follows up on Matthew's stories, who talks too fast, and they are on good terms with each other.

Chris is from Rotherham, near Sheffield. He is a year younger than the other two. He used to be a drummer, but took up bass when he was invited to join the band. He has a mild-mannered personality and is somewhat of a tosser. He is the only married man in the band or has four children and still lives in Devon.

Pic : These are the Tornados!! Matthew's dad, George Bellamy, far left.

03 - Sources of inspiration for lyrics A look at Matthew's lyrics from his early days to the present day reveals themes of body (matter) and spirit, death, religious beliefs, apocalypticism, conspiracy theories and the universe …… These themes appear repeatedly alongside pure love songs.

First, conspiracy theories. This was influenced by the shooting death of his uncle, a British Army officer, when he was four years old. The authorities told the family that it was an IRA terrorist attack, but the truth is still in the dark, and Matthew has since come to believe that some force or organisation (political, economic, religious, etc.) may be working in the dark to brainwash people and influence society through the media, etc. for their own benefit.

Space and science fiction are his romantic interests, but they are also linked to his religious views (Matthew is an atheist or agnostic). Scientific (or science fiction) explanations of the origins of mankind and the nature of all things seem to arouse his interest more than the "fantasy" of the Bible. For example, NASA's cover-up of the connection between pyramid-like debris in the "Cydonia" region of Mars and Egyptian ruins? Or the curiosity of the hypothesis that humans were created by alien genetic manipulation of apes? Matthew's favourite book by Zecharia Sitchin (The Mysterious Twelfth Planet and others) is a good source of information on this subject.

For Matthew, who has been aware of death and the soul since he was a child, death means returning to nothingness. But the feelings of the creator expressed in music remain forever. He sees music as a spiritual act in that it brings people together in a way that transcends the material.

He is also interested in survival techniques and recently bought a week's worth of emergency food and an axe in case the Earth is threatened with extinction.

Pic: 'The Mysterious Twelfth Planet' by Zecharia Sitchin, edited and translated by Ken Kashiwabara, published by Goma Books (out of print).

04 - A taste or two! Muse gossip Muse is hardly ever in the tabloids for their celebrity antics or scandals in the social world. However, they often surprise the public with their outlandish behaviour and fearless actions, which are extreme, exaggerated, and sometimes even laughable.

A famous incident occurred in 2006, when Matthew cancelled a whole day of interviews in the US because he had to evacuate out of the country due to the threat of an asteroid hitting New York. The truth is that he was mentally and physically unwell that day, but this incident added fuel to Matthew's 'eccentric and weird' legend.

The band also had a reputation for giving an all-out stage performance, but when Matthew threw his guitar in excitement, it hit Dom between the eyes, sending him to hospital. Conversely, Matthew hit himself in the face with the guitar in the heat of the moment, bleeding profusely and causing the show to be abruptly cancelled.

While they like to do big things, they are also willing to make enemies of big names and big business, which is typical of them. In 2002, when they found out that Celine Dion was going to use the name 'Muse' for her show, they demanded an injunction, saying they didn't want their music to be confused with that kind of music. They successfully won, as the band's name was already registered and trademarked. In the same year, when Nestlé used a Muse song in a coffee commercial without permission, the band, distrustful of the company's policies, were outraged and filed a lawsuit. They won this too, and the settlement was donated to charity.

Their eccentric fashion is also an "incident" in a sense? Matthew has dyed his hair crimson, blue, and bright yellow before. His "blue hair and red shirt" is legendary. Dom likes to wear loud coloured bottoms such as pink, yellow-green and yellow, as well as cosplay.

Pic by Teppei: Intense stage performances can sometimes lead to injury…….

1970s 7th December 1977 - Birth of Dominic James Howard. 9th June 1978 - Birth of Matthew James Bellamy. 2nd December 1978 - Birth of Christopher Tony Wolstenholme.

1980s Mid-1980s - The Bellamy family moves to Devon. All three of the members of Muse meet there.

1994 The band that would later become Muse is formed by the three of them

1998 24th December - Gigs in NY and LA lead to signing to Madonna's Maverick label.

1999 4th October - Debut album "Showbiz" released.

2000 1st March - First Japan tour (Shibuya On Air West) 5th-6th August - Performs at the first Summer Sonic Festival 10th-15th October - First Japan tour in Tokyo, Nagoya and Osaka (Shibuya Quattro, etc.).

2001 17th June - Second ablum "Origin of Symmetry" released. 11th-15th July - Unusual invitation-only gigs in Tokyo and Osaka (Zepp Tokyo, etc.) 28th November - 2nd December - Second Japan tour in Tokyo, Nagoya and Osaka (Zepp Tokyo, etc.).

2002 26th June - Pre-release of "Hullabaloo Soundtrack" in Japan (1st July in the UK) 26th July - Appearance at Fuji Rock Festival

2003 22nd September - Third album "Absolution" released.

2004 7th-14th February - Third Japan tour (Tokyo Bay NK Hall and others) June - Grand finale at Glastonbury Festival. The show is a huge success, but shortly afterwards Dom's father dies suddenly of a heart attack.

2005 2nd July - Live 8 charity event in Paris. 12th December - DVD 'Live From Absolution Tour' released.

2006 28th June - "Black Holes and Revelations" released in Japan first (3rd July in UK). 12th-13th August - Appearance at Summer Sonic. August Headliners at Reading/Leeds Festivals

2007 10th-19th March - Fourth Japan tour (Tokyo International Forum Hall A etc.) 16th-17th June - Sold-out shows at the newly refurbished Wembley Stadium for two consecutive days. Attracted around 160,000 people. The performance is recorded on 'HAARP'. 27th July - Live performance at Fuji Rock Festival. 28th October - Popular game series Guitar Hero III, with the song "Knights of Cydonia" included, was released.

2008 17th March - Live DVD release of "HAARP". 12th April - Appearance at the Teenage Cancer Trust charity event at the Royal Albert Hall. 17th August - Headliner at the V Festival.

2009 14th September - Release of fifth album "The Resistance".

Translator's Note: I've basically nearly covered all the known Muse articles in this magazine. The only one left is... the Top 100 Guitarists article. [shudders] God, that has so many parts to sift through...

#Matt Bellamy #Dom Howard #Chris Wolstenholme #Muse #The Resistance era #Muse band #my scan #translation #CROSSBEAT #CROSSBEAT November 2009

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