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Helluva Boss is Hella Sexist To Both Men and Women - Part 2
In my last post about HB, I was discussing how the main female characters of HB get shunted to the sidelines/used as a vehicle for the men's character development. And its about time we started talking about the male characters as well. Cos despite how female characters being mistreated is the more pressing issues (cos female characters always have trouble being written properly for hundreds of years because the writers were incels or misogynistic women) male characters have their own stereotypes or objectification that writers fall into. Especially in regards to mlm relationships (OH, WE'LL FUCKING GET TO THAT)
But for now, lets talk about the main guys in HB:
Blitzo
I might as well go into full character analysis here cos Blitz is ultimately the protagonist of the show. Blitz is a interesting character by concept. A foul-mouthed demon with a literal devil-may-care attitude, completely unprofessional, loves his job as an assassin but also craves love and intimacy with others but struggles to due to a history of failed relationships in the past so he hides behind a mask. Hes an absolute mess of a character and I love that. Blitz is not only a good vessel for comedy but drama as well as his self-sabotaging of his relationships with his friends/co-workers can be a great character arc of him learning to trust others again and start to love himself...
HOWEVER Vivziepop just LOVES throwing angst upon angst onto this guy cos it seems that every past relationship he's had from an ex-girlfriend Verosika to his former partner/childhood friend Fizzarolli to even HIS OWN SISTER ends bitterly and it seems no one from Blitz's past even likes him or is on some amiable ground. Verosika is portrayed like an antagonistic ex, Fizzarolli condescends and humiliates him and from what we see of Barbie's view from that animatic, she comments on how he fucked up her life. So we have two women who are scorned at him (one for justifiable reasons since Blitz was an inconsiderate jerk and the other for reasons we dont know yet) and a guy who broke ties with him to be his rival. And its not like Blitz isnt remorseful because whenever Verosika talks about their relationship, you can see the look of regret on Blitz's face and he was shown to be scared whenever he encounters Fizz, like a kid scared of a bully.
Even Blitz's relationship with his adoptive daughter is fucked up, Loona constantly abuses her father when hes done ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to warrant it outside of him being protective at a few moments or babying her (and by babying her I mean calling her Loonypoo or showering her with gifts and hugs). Aka what a typical parent is like. And yet he constantly bends over backwards for her and Loona hasn't even learned her lesson to stop being a bitch cos apparently the writers think women hitting men is funny. There are a few moments of them getting along, but its only for comedy. I would say the only good relationships Blitz has is with Millie and Moxxie. But even that's pushing it cos Blitz barely interacts with Millie in any meaningful way outside of co-worker banter and with Moxxie, the only meaningful scenes they share is in the Truth Seekers episode or that little scene in Seeing Stars.
Ultimately Blitz' relationships with others is why he's such a fucked up mess of a person to begin with. While he has a more stable relationship with his current friends/co-workers, the people of his past keep coming back into his life to mess with him and while he clearly regrets how he treated some, like Verosika, others like Fizz, are okay with hurting him for the evulz and thus set them up to be villainous foils. With all this baggage plus his traumatic childhood regarding his father and presumably dead mother, Blitz sounds like a great character to explore, especially with two characters who both have history with Blitz in different ways. And they barely show up.
You see, Verosika and Fizz ONLY appear in a couple episodes. Fizz appears properly (not his robot double) in the season 1 FINALE and his past with Blitzo is only expanded upon in season 2 premiere whereas Verosika had her own episode in season 1 earlier and her only other significant appearance is in the finale. Apart from that, we only get snippets of info about their relationships from Blitzo's viewpoint. WE HAVENT EVEN SEEN A FLASHBACK WITH BLITZ' BREAK UP WITH FIZZ OR VEROSIKA.
And then we come to his relationship with Stolas...and its fucking awful. That image at the top of this post? Thats what Blitz thinks of Stolas. Doesn't look like a wholesome relationship, does it? I can talk about Stolitz enough to fill a bible but to summarise: Blitz' relationship with Stolas is incredibly fucked up and whats worst, its shown so far to be one-sided. What started as a transactional sex relationship in order for Blitz to use Stolas' grimoire to enter the human world to do his job. (the ONLY METHOD HE HAS, mind you) And from what we see of Blitz' view of this relationship, he's tolerant of him at best to annoyed and angry at worst. The one scene at the end of the season 1 finale cements this when Stolas wants to comfort Blitz after the scene at Ozzies and Blitz refused to have sex with Stolas cos hes deeply hurt and embarassed after everything thats happened that night.
youtube
(btw love this video is titled Blitzo hurts stolas feelings. Like the scene of Blitz being publicly humiliated by both his ex and his rival didnt happen not 1 minute ago with Stolas just standing there not even saying anything so Blitz is clearly hurt by that but nooooo sad gay owl uwu)
Throughout the first season, Blitz treats Stolas like an abhorrent admirer with how Stolas constantly coddles or flirts with him to the nth degree and the argument shown above thats supposed to be the climax of this relationship's problems isnt even RESOLVED when the second season rolls around, the show just treats Blitzo like a tsundere slowly becoming more chill with someone whom he's force-shipped with. The writers really REALLY want you to root for Blitz to be with Stolas yet Blitz has been nothing but uncomfortable or annoyed in his presence. Look at Blitz' face on these photos on Stolas' phone. He looks bored as fuck. oH buT ItS OKAy cos BLitzo hAS a PHOTo of HIm slightly smiling AFter the two had secks so its all good.
That's not the gotcha card you think, guys. Still doesnt excuse how fucked up the relationship is
The main problem I have with Blitzo is that Vivziepop LOVES to torture this imp for drama with scorned lovers, estranged siblings, an abusive father, a presumably dead mother, an ex-best friend who's now his bully, a one-sided relationship with a powerful prince thats built on coercion and pity sex. And yet the show flits back on forth on making him this lol screw you memelord who doesnt give a fuck to a tragic, broken man who doesnt know how to love anyone and himself anymore and the show doesnt dwell hard enough into the latter. I want Blitz to get therapy already or have him actually learn from his mistakes and the show doesnt punish him for it or treat his abuse like a joke. Ive got nothing wrong with a protagonist who's an asshole but dumping all this trauma and angst onto this character who's already got issues to deal with in his current life (like stalking, his lack of respect for boundaries, saying the r slur or making fatphobic jokes) is just depressing.
Moxxie
Moxxie is by far my fave character for how level-headed and kind he is but cos the writers are so indulgent with their tropes, they've flanderised him into a soft boi malewife, infantilising him to the point he literally cant do anything without his wife picking up the slack.
My three main problems with him are: his status as a butt-monkey, his lack of agency and his co-dependency on Millie.
To start with: he's the most morally upright imp on the team so its only natural he would be the butt monkey of the team, but despite how Blitz respects him enough as an assassin, Moxxie is still ridiculed, assaulted and attacked by Blitz, Loona, Verosika, practically everyone except his wife. And while having a butt monkey for comedy is fine, the show goes out of its way to mock Moxxie for things that are so nonsensical it feels more like degradation than snarky banter. For some reason, theres a running gag where Loona and Blitz mock how fat Moxxie is...Look at him! He's thin as a pencil! WHO THE FUCK CONSIDERS THAT FAT?! And whats worse, Moxxie has internalised this by saying to Loona in the most recent episode that he lost weight, to which Loona looks up at him and ignores him. Why is this a running gag? What is the reason? It feels so cruel and pointless.
Secondly, his lack of agency. Despite Moxxie being the most intelligent of the team and his name LITERALLY MEANS "fighting spirit." he's still delegated to a damsel in distress or be given the idiot ball so other characters can have more spotlight. In the Spring Broken episode, while Blitz is distracted with Loona and Verosika, Millie and Moxxie put up the slack and carry on the mission, but Moxxie accidentally gets drunk and spends the rest of the episode being an inebriated doofus. Little moments like this are funny but there was and entire subplot in Seeing Stars where Moxxie gets roped into buying demo CDs and merchandise from every hack artist he bumps into in Hollywood and its up to Millie to take charge.
In the Exes and O's episode where we finally meet Moxxie's father and the uncomfortable reunion plus Moxxie's traumatic childhood flashback perfectly builds up to a scene where he stands up to Crimson for forcing him into marrying a dickhead shark and yet Moxxie gets struck down in one shot and wakes up being tied up at the altar. So the one chance Moxxie gets to take down his monstrous father is completely negated. Thats fucking weak.
Isnt Moxxie supposed to be a professional assassin? Have him do more badass stuff. Let him take control of a mission or a rescue. Have another scene like the Harvest Moon festival where he intimidates a villain with a DEMON-KILLING GUN. Or that scene where Blitzo and Moxxie take down a bunch of human agents in Truth Seekers. He has incredibly knowledge of weaponry and technology which are excellent skills for an assassin to have, so USE THEM. Where's this Moxxie?
This issue also ties into his relationship with his wife Millie. Even though M&M have the most stable wholesome relationship in the whole show, half the time it feels like Millie is doing the most physical work out of their relationship. Whenever Moxxie is in trouble, kidnapped, put in danger or held hostage, Millie always bursts in to save the day and that would be fine except it makes Moxxie look like some baby who cant even tie his bow without Millie there. That whole wedding crash scene in Exes and O's was all set up so Millie can burst in doing cool badass fighting and save her husband. Why couldnt Crimson lock up Millie and Blitzo too? Well, we wont be able to have our cool Millie fight scene where she murders a bunch of thugs and do a Shrek reference. It feels imbalanced calling these two a "power couple" where only ONE of them is powerful and the other is just the emotional support noodle boy. And its even worse how Millie so far hasn't been in a situation where she needs support from her husband so we dont see that much of Moxxie being a good husband outside of cute couple banter.
Basically less this and more of this
Lastly, it seems he gets hit with the angst stick too, cos the most recent episode was about his traumatic childhood with his abusive mob boss father and it turns out he isnt even dealt with or killed by Moxxie, the imps just rescue Moxxie and fuck off so Crimson can continue to be more of a problem. Yeah, that's exactly what this show needed. More traumatised men having their abuse being completely glossed over/treated as a joke so we can have our precious status quo. Except the rich white guy, he gets his happy ending.
SPEAKING OF WHICH...
Stolas
Oh god, its time we talked about this fucker.
My issue with Stolas mostly stems from two things: his treatment of the people he's supposed to care about like Blitz or Octavia and his flanderisation from a clingy rich asshole from the pilot who is in a transactional sexual relationship with a low class imp to a precious soft uwu nice guy who tries WEALLY HARWD
Vivzie clearly likes Stolas and she's been pushing for him to be a main character since the beginning, but the problem was Vivzie wants Stolas to be a well-intentioned person WHILST being a barely trying father to his teenager daughter and still being in a borderline SA relationship with a commoner.
Now I like the idea of Stolas being a complex character, theres nothing wrong with a flawed but sympathetic character (which Vivziepop is clearly trying to do). Stolas has made mistakes, he's neglected his daughter, cheated on his wife and put the only person he claims to love in his life in a transactional sexual relationship with a commoner imp, whilst treating other imps with apathy or disdain. These are all great things to unpack with Stolas, giving him the reality check he desperately needs (lets not forget he's a privleged prince of Hell and hes always been rather ignorant) so he can improve and be a better person, not just for himself, but to his daughter and to Blitz, whom he's grown to care about beyond sexual attraction.
BUT NOPE! Lets give Stolas a tragic backstory in the season 2 opener (JUST AFTER THE PREVIOUS EP TALKING ABOUT HOW STOLAS CLEARLY REALISING BLITZ DOESNT RECIPROCATE HIS FEELINGS AND THAT STOLAS MISINTERPRETED THEIR RELATIONSHIP). Lets give him an unhappy childhood, a father who doesnt care about him (yes Vivzie slap on another abusive dad to your characters as a shortcut for the audience to sympathise with them, that'll work), an unhappy marriage to an abusive woman, his relationship of Blitz is now established as a childhood friends trope (although I use the term VERY loosely as the two aren't even friends for more than a day) and instead lets depict Stolas' affair from a messy, complicated dilemma Stolas has to deal with the consequences to a triumphant act of defiance over an abusive wife. And dont get me wrong, Im totally fine with Stolas divorcing Stella, it was clear their marriage even in Stella's first appearance wasnt happy. BUT considering how that whole Circus episode was used to make the audience sympathise with Stolas EVEN MORE than the show was already doing, its overcompensating at this point.
When a show is shoving so many sad tragic scenarios into a character's backstory so the audience can buy merch feel sorry for him, thats a sign the character himself isn't very well written.
Lets also talk about Octavia, his teenager daughter who's bared witnessed to her parents declining marriage careening into divorce and while this is happening, we see Stolas making bare minimum attempts to fix his relationship with her. In Loo Land, we see Stolas taking her to a park she's clearly not interested in going to cos he's too stupid to ask about his daughter's interests and spends half the episode flirting with Blitz. After a talk with Octavia and comforts her afterwards, taking her out of the park and suggests they do something she enjoys. Now, I loved that. It really showed how Stolas can put his horniness aside to help his daughter. BUT in the next episode about them, Stolas dismisses Octavia AGAIN cos hes too focused on arguing with his ex-wife, causing Octavia to run away to the human realm. And sure Stolas is worried sick once he finds out Octavia's gone but when we get into the human realm and both him and Blitz get shoved into a sitcom studio, STOLAS JUST GOES ALONG WITH THIS WHOLE SITCOM SUBPLOT AND AGAIN FLIRTS WITH BLITZ LIKE THE PREVIOUS EPISODE OF THEM INTERACTING DIDNT HAPPEN.
With how anxious Stolas was acting throughout the first act of the episode, you would think that he wouldnt have time to deal with Blitz' sitcom shit and spend the day but NO FOR SOME REASON LOONA'S THE ONLY ONE WHO IS ACTIVELY SEARCHING FOR OCTAVIA. OCTAVIA'S OWN FUCKING FATHER IS TOO INCOMPETENT TO SEARCH FOR HER HIMSELF ALL BECAUSE OF SOME WACKY COMEDIC MISUNDERSTANDING WITH BLITZ. Oh sure, your teenage daughter's missing in the human realm but nah l'll just carry on simping for my imp bf cos HEY AT SHE'S NOT IN DANGER.
Loo Land: Stolas wants to spend a day with Octavia but ends up distracted with Blitz and learns to pay attention to his daughter and support her.
Seeing Stars: Octavia wants to spend a day with her father but Stolas dismisses her because he'd distracted with arguing with his ex-wife, causing Octavia to run off to the human realm, Stolas goes there but spends half the episode watching Blitz in a live sitcom instead of finding his daughter and yet is forgiven for being a neglectful dad.
But its okay cos Stolas and Octavia have a big hug at the end (they dont even get a chance to talk about the divorce btw since this is the first episode featuring Stolas and his family after the divorce) and despite how hurt and neglected Octavia felt by her dad, she's like "ah its no big deal the furry here told me dads fuck up but they mean well so im good now". So Stolas makes the bare minimum amount of parenting and he's forgiven for it cos he TWIES. Not trying hard enough, just trying at all. "Cos hey, at least its better than nothing!"
Vivzie, this plus the amount of abusive fathers youve already got in this show, I think you have daddy issues. You might wanna get that checked out.
So, much like with its female characters: Helluva Boss has serious problems with how it portrays men. The man with shitloads of emotional trauma and abuse is glossed over/never resolved for the sake of drama and protecting the status quo. (Blitz, Moxxie) The soft-spoken male being infantilised to the point he cant even fight his way of a paper bag with his badass hypercompetent wife to help him (Moxxie), the father who does the bare minimum amount of effort for his daughter and is forgiven for it because HE MEANS WELL (Stolas), the utterly RANCID fetishisation of mlm relationships with the endgame couple going from a toxic sexual manipulation/transactional relationship into a forbidden lovers romance (Stolitz) and the rest of the men in the show are either sex-obsessed (Chaz, Fizzarolli) or abusive (Paimon, Blitz' dad, Crimson) cos MEN AMIRIGHT?
Yeah there are a lot of perverts, coomers and abusive dads irl. Im not saying Helluva Boss isnt accurate to that fact. But these are negative stereotypes about men that shouldnt be shoved in our faces all the time. I think the only recurring male demon character so far who ISNT a chauvinistic dick, cruel or abusive is Wally Wackford. I know people pull the "oh theyre from Hell, of course they're jerks" to excuse all of this but thats fine when theyre characters youre not supposed to sympathise with like Crimson or Blitz' dad but its another thing when your supposed to sympathise with characters like Stolas but they're fucking horrible and yet the show constantly treats them like precious babus who did nothing wrong, while the characters who ARE legit sympathetic (Moxxie, Blitz) are dumped pain after pain onto them cos that makes good dramatic scenes for Youtube, not a story.
Part 1: https://www.tumblr.com/lolotheparagon/712718858369286144/helluva-boss-is-hella-sexist-to-both-men-and-women
#Youtube#helluva boss#helluva boss critical#hb stolas#stolitz sucks#stolas#hb blitzo#hb moxxie#vivziepop critical#mlm fetishization#cw fetishization
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Me, who can’t go two rough drafts without making the main characters gay
Me a girl who enjoys, reads and writes Boys Love:
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i decided i needed one i could make my lockscreen because they make me ill and at this point i'm just embracing it
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Blitz's book is real!!!
😆😆
https://www.amazon.co.uk/But-Youre-Horse-David-Bussell/dp/1291742751
The artists doing the helluva instagram are just awesome
#helluva boss#blitzo x stolas#stolitz#helluva boss instagram#Link for proof#Please don't buy from Amazon they suck
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StrikerXBlitzø but make it Loser,Baby once the gunslinger finds out our imp is feeling horrible after Apology Tour and sings to cheer him up while sneakily convincing Blitz that he should just break it off and stick with him cause fuck Stolas
#anti stolas#striker#blitzstrike#blitzø#loser baby#new canon and Viv can suck it#anti stolitz#Striker is Husk and Blitz is Angel#imagine it#helluva boss#helluva boss criticism#helluva boss critique#helluva blitzo#helluva striker
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Has anyone ever done the "showing my pet things it's never seen before" meme with Stolas and Blitz? "Showing my boyfriend things he's never seen before" and it's a picture of Stolas holding Blitz up to see on top of the fridge?
#helluva boss#stolitz#im sure someone has but i havent seen it#and the search function on this website sucks
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It happened. I've been indoctrinated. Sketch at work
#stolitz#stolas#blitzø#stolas x blitz#these two idiots#helluva boss#helluva fanart#fanart#they both suck (affectionate) and i love them#blitzo
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“one day im going to have to make like a three hour long video essay that's just called In Defense of Helluva Boss” Please do. I see more anti videos than I do with defense ones. Like the ones that say season 2 is terrible even though it’s barely completed and the ones that say Stolitz is a bad despite them barely having a relationship.
no literally i am sick of seeing more anti content than actual appreciation videos but the anti talking point i see most that drives me up the fucking walls is that it's "bAd RePrEsEnTaTiOn," as if that is all that queer people are allowed to have; just the vague nebulous concept of "Rep(TM)." the fact that if a straight character is a bad person then it's just that This Character is a bad person, but if a queer character is a bad person then This Is Bad Representation Of The Community And Is Homophobic. can we not just HAVE characters?? vehicles to tell a story??? tools to craft a compelling narrative??? this is part of why Helluva/Hazbin being adult shows is such a THING because i see this get shut down a lot under the guise of "uhh well just because it's an adult show doesn't mean that it can handle whatever topic it wants however it wants" and like. yeah buddy! that's true! and that's not what this is fucking about!! when people say "it's an adult show" what they mean is that it's made to be engaged with under the assumption that you would know better than to take information to shape your worldview and perception of other real life people from a fucking cartoon! the show doesn't NEED to tell you that Um Hey Guys Just So You Know This Isn't Actually Meant To Reflect How All Real Life Gay Relationships Are because you are an adult who should already be able to discern this.
"bad rep" doesn't mean "characters that are nuanced, morally gray, or just bad people." "bad rep" would be if helluva boss was a show that said "the REASON these characters are in toxic relationships / are bad people is BECAUSE they are queer, or at least directly correlated to that fact." which is. you know. very fucking different than "these characters are in toxic relationships / are bad people because they 1) live in a classist society that actively encourages them to be their worst selves and 2) are extremely traumatized."
#btw when i say toxic i DO mean stolitz but not in like. a 'this is romanticizing abuse !!!!1!!!!1!1!!' kind of way#which is. the second stupidest criticism of this show#like babe did you really watch blitz break down sobbing on his couch and see stolas drowning in his depression cereal and absinthe#and some how come to the conclusion that the lesson you are meant to take away from this is that This Is A Good Thing To Aspire To ??????#their dynamic IS toxic rn!! neither of them are communicating properly and neither of them are getting what they TRULY want#and the whole point of watching this situation (this shituation; if you will) play out#is to be entertained first of all BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY#because you are supposed to go Man This Relationship Status Sucks For Them Right Now I Sure Hope They Can Make It Better#you are supposed to recognize that it is Bad for them right now. because you are a fucking adult who should have a CRUMB of media literacy#god. sorry this is so long#video essay is gonna be four hours at this rate istfg#mine#ask#helluva boss#stolitz#analysis#long post#fandom
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GUYS, LADS AND LASSES, DEAR HB COMMUNITY
Can I just thank you for saving my ass yesterday?
Viv killed me, delivering the final blow, and you resuscitated me-- with all your observations, analysis, memes, and support, and me not being capable of producing anything for you in return, and least not that quickly, I owe you eternally.
I love this fandom.
#helluva boss#Blitzø needs a fucking hug#Not a crash course on how to do a good head game#BECAUSE HE IS NOT BAD AT IT#Even in the silly penguin short Viv manage to shove Stolitz drama#not even mentioning Stolas once#the audacity of this woman#I can't#(affectionate but bleeding and sad and fucking ANGRY)#and mind you we had to suck it up and keep writing the smut scene in fic pretending we didn't see Blitzø self-deprecating about sex skills#well I just read what our fic co-author wrote#but still#shitpost kinda?
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Random thought: every Stolitz shipping moment/raunchy scene but with the most unsexy music ever: the Mr Benn theme song
Just to piss off all the Stolitz shippers :)
youtube
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Oh wait i just realized @lee1504 did the same thing lol
#helluva stolas#helluva blitzo#helluva boss#artists on tumblr#artblr#hazbin hotel#helluva stella#helluva moxxie#helluva millie#millie bobby brown#moxxie#blitzø#stolitz is dead 🙃#stolas x blitz#m and m#moxxie x millie#stella x striker#stolas#ars goetia#stolas goetia#helluva boss blitz#blitzo#blitzy#stols#fandom ships#ships#helluva ships#relationship#relationships#relationships suck
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Me everytime I see someone victim blaming Blitzo:
#anti stolas#anti helluva boss#anti stolitz#helluva boss critical#meme#blitzo deserves better#some shippers suck
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I am never recovering from the newest helluva boss episode.
#helluva boss#blitzø#stolas#stolitz#wtf guys#viziepop wtf#viziepop#helluva stolas#they’re both so stupid#and they’re in love#but they both suck at communicating#so bad#i can’t keep doing this
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stolas is such a disney princess in that new helluva sneakpeak cuz the bubble thing is so the little mermaid AND THEN blitz just being avoidant to stop thinking of the relationship stuff and just singing about fucking stolas 😴
#blitz j talking ab stolas sucking him off and then my silly gay owl having a meltdown over their meet up#maki.talks#helluva boss#stolas x blitz#blitzo#blitzø#stolas#stolas goetia#stolitz
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☆Fixing the biggest problem with Stolitz so it's not creepy☆
Ahoy Matey's, I'm gonna keep this short and sweet so I can get back to working on tiktok art, personal art, and other random stuff. (When I say random stuff I mean working on my Blitzø Redesign because hes so skrunkly and I love him.)
As you all know, (Actually as I'm writing this I don't think I've said this on here. Um, I'm rewriting Helluva Boss. Lol 🫶), I'm rewriting Helluva Boss. I've seen alot of people, me included, hating Stolitz because it's unhealthy and toxic and Stolas abuses Blitzø. I've seen one main issue that is so easily fixed. DON'T MAKE STOLAS SEXUALLY ABUSE BLITZØ. Seriously it's that easy. Wanna know how I'm gonna fix this I'm my rewrite?
Stolas doesn't use sex as the deal.
How I'm fixing this is Stolas has Blitzø kill people for him instead of Stolas wanting to bang him. That would fix it. Instead of Stolas sexually abusing Blitzø he has him kill people, like in the pilot. If they wanna sleep with each other than they can because they are two consensual adults but it would be less creepy.
See how easy that is. C'mon Viv step up.
(Will post Blitzø soon!! Then the Hazbin Hotel human designs and redesigns. I have so much work to do-)
- ⭐️StarClown⭐️
#vivziepop critical#rant#stolitz hate#Blitzø deserves better#Stolas sucks#helluva boss criticism#helluva boss critical
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GUESS WHAT DAY IT IS
For today let's have some angst about Blitzø and his mom!
Stolas looked up at the willow tree; he wrapped his hands around his opposite arms, hugging himself tight. “Are you close with your mother?” Blitzo looked away. “My mom’s dead.” Inhaling hard, Stolas said, “I- I’m sorry. I mean- my condolences.” The silence stretched out under the willow tree like a lazy animal, thick and sprawling. When Blitzo glanced up, Stolas was staring up at a high, thick branch; Blitzo wondered if that was the one his mom hanged herself from. “I’m- I didn’t mean-” Stolas stammered, and turned away. “Shall we go back?” Something turned over in Blitzo’s stomach, an unpleasant flop. Not that he liked to think about Mom, but the thought of just moving on and forgetting about her, now that he’d been asked about her, made him want to throw up. He stayed right where he was, looking at the trunk of the willow tree like the pattern in the bark was a book he was struggling to read. “She was cool,” Blitzo said, too loud and too harsh in the still summer air. He heard Stolas come up behind him, steps soft in the carpet of underbrush, fallen sticks and leaves. “Mom. She was- like, she was funny.” Stolas stood next to him, looking carefully away, like Blitzo was a bird that would take off if startled. “And not- not the bullshit people say about a dead girl,” the words kept waterfalling out of his mouth, “like, wow, she lit up a room, she was so.... all that shit. Like, she was actually funny, mean funny. She could get my dad so mad, ‘cause he could yell, but she could make us laugh. He was the boss, but she never let anybody get away with shit. Like, she’d never give you a pity laugh. If your joke wasn’t funny, she’d just look at you and you’d feel.... But when she did laugh, it was the fucking best. ‘Cause you knew it was real.” The wind rustled through the willow branches. Blitzo’s eyes burned. “She thought I was funny,” he said, and stopped. “I’m sure she did,” Stolas replied, quite gently, and that didn’t help the growing lump in Blitzo’s throat at fucking all. “I used to get up early to drink coffee with her. I hated coffee, but it was the only time I got to just, like. Be with her, without anybody else. She told me I was responsible,” he forced out; he had to, he should shut the fuck up but he had to get this out or he'd choke on it. “She trusted me.” “I’m sure sh-” Stolas started to say a second time, and Blitzo couldn’t stand it. “Don’t,” he interrupted, clenching his eyes shut and trying not to cry. She trusted me, and I killed her. “Just- don’t.”
Tagging @nyxofdemons, @goddessofcoloredpencils, @cringefailvox and @stolitzsings !!!
#helluva boss#stolitz#tilla buckzo#hb#fingersmith au#i'm sure this will all get jossed by ghostfuckers BUT#anyone else obsessed with fictional moms that aren't perfect paragons#who are kind of mean and harsh bc their lives suck but try really hard for their kids#just me? ok cool#my writing
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