#still sort of gets 2 me
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Personally I think the little phenomenon w/ Johnny Whitney writing a just genuinely sort of devastating song once per every record or so (or twice! take, well, Take Me to the Sea 4 example. actually three times maybe. talking about specifically georgia + my organ sounds like… here and also bonetrees and a broken heart a little. also also As Brass And Satin just feels utterly melancholic in its near entirety) is that he just wakes up face down covered in blood in the studio, his own or someone else’s he can’t tell, shaking and grasping some shoddily scrawled out lyrics on a rlly very old piece of paper. The rest of the band might be like “johnny what the fuck happened” and he just springs 2 his feet like “oh haha nothing :> im fine don’t worry. nothing happened!!!!!!! anyways i have this cool new idea 4 a song wanna hear” and any time anyone tries 2 ask about it he immediately dodges the question and moves on2 a diff topic. He can explain what it’s about, but any time someone asks about the inspiration he gets nervous and is like “ohhh ummm. I 4got! Any other song though lol” and doesn’t wait 4 an answer. that’s just a theory though a Seattle theory
#evil neighing compilation#only exceptions I can think of r like… March on electric children and the rlly early bbs stuff. not vade though that stuffs filled w/#inexplicable sadness#I can’t say much regarding hologram jams or soiled life since I haven’t lsitened 2 them in full#‘r you 4 real saying that this adultery has a devastating song on there’ yes I am in fact! im singling out time for tenderness here. what#the hell happened 2 them when they were like 17-19 (that’s my guess 4 the age range anywho) 2 write that. is it just me who feels like that#about time for tenderness or#crimes. doesn’t make me feel sad per se. but the title track and beautiful horses I just. understand So Much it gets 2 me rlly bad#bpib should be obvious. the shame. but also every breath is a bomb once you know the context of who it was partially written about#especially Jordan’s part :-(#young machetes… actually not giant swan or street wars/exotic foxholes 4 me though I suppose I get the sense that I’m supposed 2 feel sad#about them#it’s camouflage camouflage 4 me!#what else what else. oh yeah Johnnys solo stuff. that entire little acoustic mixtape thingy is very sad feeling 2 me in some way#but esepcially at the end of the road there’s a sapphire pit. genuinely made me bawl my eyes out the other night. jfc it’s gr8 but it makes#me feel a little sick 2 my stomach sad#OH MY GOD I 4GOT. NEON BLONDE LOL#that’s also a p obvious choice. chandeliers and vines#it’s a sort of sarcastic song one could suppose. that’s true 4 a lot of Whitney’s work (especially in tbb though Tbf)#still sort of gets 2 me#ya know#done tags rambling my bad
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Captain Francis Crozier, at Furthest North.
#the terror amc#francis crozier#my art#can't believe it took me 2 rewatches AND getting refs for this to realize it's the hungarian state opera house. girl i was there last month#anyway yeah i was looking at gifsets of the last shot of the show and feeling nauseous with emptiness etc etc when#the thought struck me that it looks an awful lot like the tableau vivants from the ep1 flashbacks in its stillness#i have no idea whether that was an intentional reference (a sort of twisted mockery of how that scrubbed and polished portrayal of history#contrasted with the deeply sad and inglorious reality#or some sort of meta about storytelling itself. i'm not really smart enough to say lol) but i made this anyways. enjoy#pattern recognition go brrrrrrrrrrrrrr#i bent over backwards trying to make this symmetric and harmonious. it isn't but if i don't post it now i never will
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One of my first digital pieces (2010) versus one of my recent ones (2024)
We all start somewhere!
#picked these cause they're in a similar pose lol. i mean not at all. but sort of... more than my other art at least...#oh fuck im so tired im saving this to drafts and coming back later#my anxiety meds wipe me the fuck out so im trying not to take them in the day#and they're like legit borderline a sleeping med for me. i take one and in 30 mins im OUT.#so I'm. i mean i was already only taking 1-2 in the day and then 2-3 at night#anyways it makes me sad when people say they dont have an artistic bone in their body#and especially when they say they could never draw like me :(#dont put yourself down to lift me up! i don't want my art to be used for you to be mean to yourself!!!#lots of experiences of people comparing themselves to me and being mean to themself...#feels bad. it's okay if you're slow it's okay to be learning it's okay!!!#I'm me and you're you and we're here to learn from each other. i just wanna hang out..#y'know what I'm just gonna post without saying anything i WILL forget I made a draft#i have so many things i intend to post and then forget#it's a wonder I post anything#i only do it when i get bored. and run out of stuff to scroll through#like whelp. guess if i want a post I have to make one myself.#also the second one is really good idc that it's a study i still drew it#art growth#this was in 2010 btw#i started highschool in 2011#I've grown a lot and you can too.#also I've never really been one to dislike my old art. like idk I was trying... if it's bad I just won't look at it whatever#like i wouldn't be mean to someone else who made that so i don't get a free pass to be mean just cause it's to me#man my thoughts are bungled. okay sleep time#if my phone made typos you didn't see it
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gnawing on my arm because i think there's something to be said about how stede not only dreams about himself with a beard, but ed with his full beard back too. like, the dream seems to be riddled with imagery that he thinks ed would want.
and i say this especially because of how stede reacted when ed had to shave his beard. he freaked out on his behalf. he shrieked in horror whereas ed was entirely unbothered. he feared he had ruined him, had dragged him down to some despicable level, when in actuality, ed was completely content to shed that part of his persona.
and then there he is dreaming about ed with that part right on back.
so there's very clearly still a part of his mind that's convinced that's what ed wants. because why wouldn't he? everyone else seems to. and why would he want the softness and femininity stede had been bullied for his entire life?
which in turn plays into his own imagery too. bearded, masculine, fiercesome, rugged...
because how could someone love what everyone has hated him for? how could someone want what everyone has tried to quite literally beat out of him?
#OFMD#OFMD Season 2#OFMD S2 Spoilers#Gentlebeard#Blackbonnet#Edward Teach#Stede Bonnet#Revenge Rambles#ALSO#I SAY ALL OF THIS TO SAY#I really REALLY hope they have a conversation about it#Because Stede clearly has some issues going on with his self-worth still#He's getting BETTER#But he's definitely still having issues#And I really hope I'm on the money when it comes to that one shot where Ed seems to be looking at him drinking/partying in Spanish Jackie'z#And is looking TROUBLED#I keep envisioning an exchange where Ed is like 'Well this is...different'#And Stede cheerily goes 'Ah yes. Trying something new! Do you like it?'#And Ed looks him dead in the eye and goes 'Do YOU?'#Also it kills me how they're both sort of having the same issues just in different fonts#Ie Ed worrying that he's unlovable how he is#And Stede ALSO worrying that he's unlovable how he is#They both want to change parts of themselves/shy away from parts of themselves#When in reality both of them love each other for who they really are#AND I HOPE THEY HAVE A CONVERSATION CENTERED AROUND JUST THAT#I HOPE THAT'S WHAT AAAALLL OF THIS IS BUILDING TO
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It was a girl. She was a little girl. ↳ Carla Connor + Being the mother she could have been
#thinking about how the people around carla- the people who have known her for almost 2 decades- still dont really know her#they see her as this cold uncaring bitch with more divorces than sense#but god... this woman just. she has so so so so much love to give and how lucky are the few the get to know what that feels like?#she has built herself the family she always wanted but never had- not as a kid not after liam not after losing her baby#and she has this uncanny ability to sort of Know who needs her love the most she just keeps collecting these people#who are weird and lonely and misunderstood and she just opens her arms and makes the belong y'know?#roy cropper said she would have been a great mother but i mean... she has been a great mother All Along.#mygifs#swarla#carla connor#*#dont even touch me rn i had to watch all the miscarriage scenes and i am not well.
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Honestly the best way I can describe the 2nd season of Arcane is written by extremely competend writers who bit off way more than they could chew. Especially in that short of a timeframe.
It's possible that it was a higher up decision for future League shows, but the focus on the Black Rose & magic worldbuilding took away focus from the core cast and the narrative of 2 cities/sisters opposed to one another. They desperately needed at least 3 more episodes
The writers are competent, but they made some deliberate choices I don't like and pulled focus from things I believe they should've left in focus. It feels like the entire narrative of the show got changed between seasons, and maybe it was always the intention and I should rewatch the entire show front-to-back without a massive hiatus in-between them for me to get it, but from my current standing... It could've been more, and the things that they did focus on and give time to were really good. It's just that the show lost its priorities and primary narrative along the way
#why yes i am still upset about vi but there is other stuff to be found here too#sevika isha and jinx being established in act 1 and not being focused on for the rest of the show. specifically sevika just vanishing#i love mel but the black rose plotline came out of left-field and needed more time that this show could nooot afford.#if it deserved it at all. honestly the plot was just unsatisfying to me in general#the end product is banging but the way we got there was sort of tedious#i changed my mind. they should've SHORTENED the black rose storyline#i think vi's and powder's dad getting less than 0 acknowledgement was hilarious. go dude give us nothiiiing#dont get me started on vi.#dont get me started on caitlyn and vi.#they were one of those relationships playing into the piltover vs zaun narrative and just like that narrative their relationship was wooshe#or at least its built up. they are so unstable and needed more focus before becoming endgame in my humble opinion#but i also cant say where to fit that amongst everything else#actually scratch that. jayvik was the endgame of the show and it was a BIG surprise. but a welcome one#arcane#arcane s2#arcane season 2#arcane spoilers#arcane s2 spoilers#arcane season 2 spoilers#bear rambles
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number #1 tactic that people use to not sound as racist as they are when they talk to black people: 'uhh so you AMERICANS need to stop pretending everything is about YOU. why should i know this im not from the us :/' (= is talking about like. a phenomenally internationally well-known black artist)
#myposts#kendrick lamar#drake#i updated it from 'white europeans' to 'people' because some people pointed out that 'gringo' is probably more south american lingo#but the point i wanted to make is like. there is this subset of european people (quite a lot of them)#who try to deflect by saying them not knowing these things isn't because of an active lack of disinterest in black culture and influences#and like. them not knowing who a certain black person is is never an educational failing on their side of any sorts#but instead are pretending that like. they are by virtue of being european always correctly educated on What History And Art Is Important#like. 2 months back that one post pretending that 'us europeans dont need to know all your AMERICAN writers 🙄' talking about james baldwin?#like just because that person didnt know who james baldwin was#they immediately were mad at the implication that They Didn't Know Someone Of Cultural Significance#and twisted it into 'well he cant be that important by virtue of me not knowing him'#like completely ignoring that the european school system also has. race problems and also ignoring that he lived and wrote in France too#but like. its this really racist defence mechanism of like. 'well you stupid americans always make everything about yourselves'#i hope i make sense i didnt think this would blow up lol#and like some people in the notes of that post were so smug about not knowing who Kendrick Lamar is#bc to them thats like 'oh im too cultured to be listening to rap of any sorts' like completely dismissing his music as kind of second class#by virtue of it being rap and black music and him not being in the White Mainstream as much as other musicians#(i mean hes still like 24th most listened artist worldwide but you get what i mean)
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"Light Spinner" was honestly the most heartbreaking She Ra episode I've seen so far
Catra constantly insists she is nothing like Shadow Weaver in any way, but the parallels between her journey and Shadow Weaver's as Light Spinner are not even subtle. Shadow Weaver even says they are similar, that she reminds her of herself. And as much as Catra insists she doesn't want that, of course she wants that. She wants them to be similar because she thinks that Shadow Weaver will finally love her and appreciate her if she's another version of her, only better, if she doesn't make the same mistakes, if she comes out on top. She hates her so much but she also wants to BE her, but the thing preventing her from following in Shadow Weaver's footsteps is the best part about her. It's her capacity for love and kindness. It's her lack of selfishness and greed. She never wanted to rule the hoard or be second in command, but she feels like she has to be even as her own nature rebels against it.
#it astounds me when people say Catra wasn't well written#look at this#its right in front of you#she wants love but the only way she knows to get it is power#I am going to cry#I already have but I'll do it again#and shadow weaver can go die in a hole with no one to love her for doing this to catra#catra#shadow weaver#spop#she ra and the princesses of power#catra meta#spop meta#I'm still only on season 2 but I feel like I sort of know where this is going#DIE shadow weaver DIE#why shadow weaver deserves death: a saga
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fairest of the fair
#hi! im alive and back and etc.#six the musical#six the musical fanart#katherine howard#thinking of that post going 'i think eventually you become the person you needed most' and like maybe that's the thing with my art#this started out as a redraw and <improvement meme> i think i've finally reached the stage where i'm making the things that my younger self#aspired to create. like i can do this now! i've reached That level of technical skill! tiny me would be so proud. it's very gratifying#redraw from august this year actually. i've made a surprising amount of improvement HAHA maybe it was the adamandi stuff getting me#back into digital rendering. i think that obsession has quietly slipped away but yknow. one never truly leaves a fandom. just less intensit#also speaking of old fandoms! we're back with the six stuff haha. as of writing i'm in the midst of blog revamp- figuring out how to chill#multifandom status doesn't mean ditch all the old stuff ! but i do feel much freer and less stressed. i think hiatus has been good for me#notes on this piece particularly: redraw about cutting hair and thinking of the lyric above. also lowkey &j ref + pinterest poem excerpts#of female suffering. and maybe a dash of amanda heng let's walk inspo. this work is really just full of contradictions..#1. the mirror and cutting hair as an act of self liberation 2. the & is part of the lyric but also a nod to &j (in another iteration it was#pink but the white looked better) and like. &j is really all !!! girl power!!! etc. and i was like hmmmm. also matching pink shiny aes#3. the frame as a cage; the mirror as a self reflection idea (ie. saville's propped insp) but also as a sign of vanity. 4. sparkly costume#and pretty pose- read one too many poems about women feeling like they have to be pretty even in their suffering. something i wanted to#explore. and also in 5. the show itself... all you wanna do is. despite all the dancing and pink and sparkly the content of the song is#darker. and even though it's a story of her suffering it's still presented as a shiny fun pop song and ajshdhfhfh ok... 6. the lyrics fall#outside the frame. sort of a caught inbetween. sort of a trapped in the narrative and yet#within the frame it's all. vaguely handwavy breaking free vibes. like i said contradictions?#7. cutting off the long ponytail vs the pull my hair lyric at the end. yeah#8. the blocked off & looks a bit like scissors. positioned to cut right at the neck#anyways yeah irl remains hectic! but if i get around to more doodles they'll appear here :)
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#BRUHHHHHH I NEED ANOTHER TEASER I BEG YOU RIOT#ITS BEEN THREE YEARS I CANT WAIT TO USE NEW CONTENT FOR GIFS LMAO#personal tag#dont look at me im just here to complain about content drought lmao its really not good in fostering a healthy fandom ngl#because ppl will just hyperfixate and consume media for like a month and then the fandom goes poof right after lol#i miss all the people scrutinizing media every week i miss all the essays pumping out when content arrives#these days its just.... nothing lmao i only really still have arcane in my mind because of fanfiction and a lot of fics have been inactive#ik we're getting new stuff in a few months#and ik we're not in canceled shows hell but like#i really hope that if theres season 3 we're gonna get it a bit more regularly#i really miss it when content was like weekly or every 2 weeks because ppl and the fandom are wayyyy more active during those times#binge culture and netflix sort of changed it lol#i miss it when fandoms were huge!!! i miss it when it was so CHAOTIC lmaooooooooo#I MISS WAITING FOR LONG ASS HOURS WAITING FOR CONTENT TO RELEASE EVERY WEEK!!!! I MISS IT!!!! that was like what 12 years ago LOL#I KNOW arcane is special with their 3 year drought because it takes time to make arcane#but like..... idk man i miss content lmao#iirc they took too long to make s2 bc they have no idea if s1 would be even renewed#so i hope s3 will be a bit more regular now#anyways im gonna go bye bye
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Hey long time no post! :D It's been a hot minute for sure lol but I'm back in full swing this weekend for grand festival 🩷💚 I decided to take on the ever so ambitious (for me lol) project of drawing all the idols over the next few days omg.. Am I ever gonna get to playing turf wars?? 。゚(゚´Д`゚)゚。 anw the squid sisters are up first YAYY!! And hopefully Pearl and Marina tomorrow, fingers crossed I can keep this going!!
#I'm team present btw hehe#also life update I went through a breakup a week ago yippie..#but I'm finally at some sort of normal right now so I'll be okay!!#it's been rough lol#But hey on the plus side its really motivated me to draw a lot!! :D#that's something!#artists on tumblr#art#cute art#digital art#digital illustration#teacolouredart#splatoon 3#squid sisters#splatoon#grand festival#splatoon splatfest#splatoon fanart#splatoon callie#splatoon marie#callie and marie#it's past 2 am for me btw I'M STILL GONNA GET ONE GAME IN TRY AND STOP ME#procreate#splatfest
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The Twin Boys; One in Black, One in White
#meek’s art#meek’s headcanons#micah bell#amos bell#Bells family#rdr2#red dead redemption 2#Rdr2#My hc for Amos mostly come from Amras’s headcanons#Wip lore so bare with me#Amos wasn’t inherently a better person than Micah#amos was just more capable of change#And lucked out on not being the person to carry the family’s legacy#Amos got a working girl pregnant and sort of had to hide it from their dad#This could be a fan fic idea i swear#Amos was around the working girl to make sure she didn’t peep about the secret#She saw something in him. I guess Amos too saw something in her beside his soon-to-be child#She ended up getting him out of his abusive home life. He got her out of a life of working on the street corner#They are a bit like romantic run away lovers except they ran away before they truly fell in love#I really would love to write about Amos more#I wanna give his wife a name and apperance too#Amos is still working through being an not-good person even while dating his wife#Amos and Micah are of the same blood. One could fight his demons. The other succumbed.
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from this concept:
I now have a very cool, very soft, and entirely hand-made 2017 Louie plush !!!!!!
Very silly tail ⬇️
He has a completely functional pull-apart jacket zipper !!!
Also completely functional: the pockets 😼
And here is also a closeup on the little phone
He is made up almost entirely of fleece, all hand-sewn. His shirt and some of his eyes are felt (also the scar on his foot). He's stuffed with polyfill . He's weighed down with lentils 😭 His pattern is made custom by me :) I'm not sure exactly how long he took, but I'd guess some amount of months. Maybe 2, but maybe only a few weeks of collective actual work days
He does also have a dog toy type squeaker in him
#DuckTales#DuckTales 2017#Dt17#Does this count as fanart#DuckTales fanart#Dt17 fanart#Louie duck#Dt17 Louie#Errrrrmmm#Sewing#Hand sewing#Plushies#Guys idk how to tag sewing projects#His beak was genuinely a NIGHTMARE to pattern. It took like 4 collective days of trying#It is also sewn on like. Crooked. So so sorry#Scar on his foot (as mentioned in the concept) is a reference to glomtales#Specifically the scene where he's trying to climb out of the window and dt87 bot shoots him w a laser#Absurd decision. Anyway I just think it's sort of fun to include things like that#I would've given him little freckles but I don't have a thread that'd make them subtle enough and I hate drawing details on#Btw I originally had a cute golden zipper w green fabric around it. It was closed-bottomed but I still wanted to use it bc it was all I had#Then I sewed it on and cut it too short. Had to make a surprise trip to joann's to get a new one#I love fabric stores they're so interesting 2 me#He's like 10 inches tall btw. Give or take a little#I DO PLAN TO MAKE DEWEY AND HUEY probably soon if I don't have any more fun projects to get to
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I'm rewatching Alex Rider for like the 7th time but with my boyfriend and guys season 2 is so fucking good SEASON 2 IS SOOO GOOD
Alex being such a cheeky brat with the department and Alan Blunt losing his mind because Alex is being so clever and annoying
The slowly building mystery with all the pieces that gradually come together
Alex and Kyra being so cute with the washer and "survivors club" and "keeping score" of who has saved each other's life the most (and the end scene where he's looking up at her from the stage🥹😭)
Jack having her own storyline that actually serves the story and gives her character a purpose
Tom and Kyra both helping to progress the plot in ways that are genuinely required from them and makes sense for their characters
The subtle hints that Yassen is going to wind up helping Alex in the end, the way his character gradually becomes more complex with each episode
Alex just generally being so smart, so resourceful, so capable and just really encompassing his character, not to mention the genuine depth that comes from his trauma + him accidentally getting people killed over the course of the season (Blunt telling him he has blood on his hands)
The tension that builds within The Department as Smithers and Mrs. Jones start keeping secrets from Blunt about Alex
Damian Cray just getting absolutely dogpiled by Alex and the gang who just keep screwing over his plan again and again
Alex and Yassen FINALLY having a full conversation and it holds so much weight and hits so good
The part where Sabina cracks Anders over the head with her own laptop (honorable mention)
All the cheeky light hearted bits where the kids are just being shitheads with too much power, like cutting off the electricity to the whole postal code just to use the computer lab
And then on the flip the angst that comes from literally no one believing Alex about anything for like 60% of the season
It's just scene after scene of "oH THIS PARTS SO GOOD" and it doesn't stop until the very end
has it been long enough that I can say that season 3 just doesn't hit the same😭
#alex rider#season 3 is okay but the characters do so much shit just to serve the plot and it doesn't make any sense sometimes and idk what happened#Julia Rothman (and Nile) is like caricature evil villain and it's too obvious and Alex would NOT trust her he's way too smart#They should have made her way more charming and likeable to the point where even the audience is wondering if she's good#Alex and Kyra's relationship gets weird and forced and it makes no sense that Kyra instantly turns on him and decides he's a killer#Jack does nothing Tom's brother does nothing Tom and Kyra barely do anything#Yassen does a bunch of stuff that makes no sense to me absolutely hate that they made him lie to Alex#The Department gets painted way too much as “the good guys” by the end#Alex becomes very emotional and it clouds his judgement but we haven't seen him slowly get there over the course of the show#He sort of just sees that video then gets there all at once right off the bat and then makes dumb decisions the entire season#anyways blah blah I'll shut up now it's still my favorite show in the entire world forever and ever#season 3 was still the event of the year for me and one of the most fun weeks of my life#but season 2 u will always be famous..
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i am still sulking about no aster. (give me a few days and a couple watermelons and i'll be back to normal)
#i was one of the people who (after the reveal) fell to their knees in the burger king parking lot. maybe even wailed skyward for a smidge#my petty side says the silhouette tease and tagline HAD to have been intentional to get us to think of aster#my rational side says that they probably did not think that hard about it#and NO they are NOT intentionally bullying familiar fans and feeding off their betrayed tears /... i hope 😂#no ears and tail.... twink who gets burnt.... WHAT WE COULD HAVE HAD....#me 1: don't you like garu? what's the problem?#me 2: i'm CONFLICTED ok. i can like the char but still feel BITTERLY DESTROYED ABOUT LOST POTENTIAL#I NEEEED THE TRANSGRESSIOnS. THE BREAKS IN THE PATTERNS!!!!#oh if we had a familiar treated as a clan member. an aster dante quincy banner. unbelievable. the comedy of it all#i mean. at least this trio is a new combo. AND they haven't been in summer banners before...?#er. summer banners likE THIS. with the beachwear and stuff.#gaAAAHHH but tthe fact that they made it garu#MEANS THAT WIPES OUT ANY IMMINENT DREAMS OF MY TRIPLE YOKAI EVENT#aaaaaahhh. i see. THAT's what this is about#what? like they're gonna suddenly break the pattern and have an event that's JUST yakumo and kuya?#please. we have seen by now that no molds shall be broken. *pathetic sniff*#i guess we'll just keep doing the same top-bottom pairs forever...#and certain characters will never get to mingle with others because they've been SORTED#into HOLE FILLER and HOLE FILLED-EE#*rolls around on the floor in a melodramatic whiny flopfest*#LET THEM ALL ROAM FREE RAAAAAAAAAAANGE
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Not me brainstorming ideas for my post op tattoo (context) like I'd contact the tattoo artist tomorrow and not in a 1,5 year or more
This was where my inspiration took me today I guess :'D
#bold of me going for colour in most of these since none of my other things have colour x'D#after all this is only what ideas I have rn :'D#as mentioned I don't think I'll be able to get a chest tattoo for at least one year and a half#in half a year I've been promised to start appointments with a therapist again about the surgery#then if I'm lucky I'll get approved#and then there's a waitlist on at least a year last I heard#and then I need to heal a bit first#so when we arrive at that point in time who knows if I've better ideas#or if I've changed my mind#I hope to have käärijä in my life for years to come still#or at least feel the same sort of gratitude for him showing me how to love my body and/or feel neutral about it when dysphoria hits#look at me being chatty in the tags yet again#also - these are of course only concepts#I will probably have send the reference picture as well to the tattoo artist if I actually went to find one to do these tomorrow x'D#I hope you like them :3#I really enjoy number 2 (top left) and 3 (mid)#jere pöyhönen#käärijä#cha cha cha#mine#my own art
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