#stephanie brown could do it
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The batfamily must be fucking scary. Imagine being alone in the middle of the night picking a lock from some bank you want rob, you hear nothing but you can feel someone watching you. You look around, a bit suspicious but see nothing, however, the feeling doesn’t go away. You hear a light footstep, it sounds just distant enough to be threatening. You wait for someone to appear and try to arrest you but nothing happens. No one comes. You go back to the lock, but the nervousness isn’t letting you do the job right, with that amount of paranoia just before you’re about to give up you can see a dark bat-like figure jumping out of the nearest building, flying down with an inhuman speed and knocking you out. You don’t have time to think, or run, just scream hoping that you won’t die tonight.
#i wouldnt walk in gotham at night#seeing any bats around must be the scariest experience someone will live to tell you about#like#idc that their friendly w good ppl or save kids from buildings on fire#when they jump from the darkness with threatening sentences (or worst; complete silence) ill forget any good theyve ever done#dc comics#batman#batfamily#dc#batfam#robin#batgirl#especially batgirl#helf yhe robins would be cracking jokes and never build up this amount of tension#this is some batman or batgirl shit right there#nightwing could probably pull it off tho#tim drake could also#red hood is not that time of guy but he could be if he wanted to#stephanie brown could do it#not saying she would but she definitely could#cassandra cains whole vibe as a crime fighter is just that#batmans too obvi#my dc posts
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POV: You're on Gothamtwt
just gothamite things
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#a person could literally explode in broad daylight & gothamites would just b like: wow crazy. anyways#ppl from other cities shit talk gothamites all the time but lets be real theyre probably the most durable kind of ppl#fucking brainiac could come down and threaten gotham & the citizens would just be like 'ok lol do ur worst'#every week u'll see a different piece of bat paraphernalia get auctioned off on twitter & the entirety of gotham treats it like a sport#social media au#dc comics#nightwing#dick grayson#barbara gordon#oracle#jason todd#red hood#stephanie brown#spoiler#damian wayne#robin#black bat#cassandra cain#batfam#batfamily#batkids#batman#bruce wayne#incorrect quotes#texts#tweets#twitter#crack#fanatical posting
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It's a Deal.
So! Steph is in a bit of a Bind. Literally.
Her Father had just discovered that she was the Vigilante who kept ruining his Plans, and decided to Deal with her. So he tied her up at a Bomb Site for one of his Plans and left her to die there.
No matter how much she struggled, she couldn't escape the Ropes, and time was running out. If only she had managed to get that last message out to Batman in time, maybe he would have come to rescue her.
The Timer had nearly reached Zero, when all of a sudden Time Stopped. The Ropes around her fell away, and a guy walked up to her as if it was the most normal thing in the world.
"Hey, you seem to be in a bit of a bind."
"Not so much anymore, was that you?"
"Yeah, bit of a Free Sample. See, I'm in a bit of a bind as well. I made a Deal with these floating Eyeballs, and long story short in order to keep my town safe I need to take the Soul of an Innocent person."
"And is that where I come in?"
"Yup, Basically I save your life, help you out with whatever you want, and you give me the rights to your Soul."
"What if I just walk away while time is stopped?"
"The building is Locked down tight, and I can't actually hold Time stopped for too long either way, it's sort of a new power to me. Without my help you wouldn't get out in time."
"So it's sell my soul or die?"
"Trust me,I don't like it either, but it's what I have to do."
"You know what, sure. You help me escape, help me take down The Cluemaster, and I'll give you my Soul."
"Then it's a Deal."
"I think this is the start of a beautiful friendship."
#Dpxdc#Dp x dc#Dcxdp#Dc x dp#Danny Phantom#Dc#Dcu#Stephanie Brown#Spoiler#Danny made a deal with the Observants to protect Amity Park from Ghosts and the GIW in exchange for completing a task for them#They want to be dicks so they Send him to steal the Soul of an innocent person#Danny doesn't like it so he goes to a Vigilante who could probably find a way out of it#Spoiler is smart enough to escape the deal and she is currently in need of help so he goes to her#Steph is just happy she made a new friend#Also she realizes the deal never said Danny had to keep the Soul#Or that he had to do anything with it in particular
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Tim: So, and for what reason was I 17 years old for the last 15 years?
Damian: That's what you're complaining about? They couldn't even bother to give me a proper characterization until much later on. And then it is one that does not align with my upbringing!
Stephanie: At least you weren't killed just because of misogyny
Dick: Yeah, I wonder how anyone let that through. But then again, I shouldn't expect anything else from writers who made me stuck as Ric for two years and all the, you know, Tarantula stuff
Jason: It's honestly like they just spin a wheel every day to figure out if I'm a villain, hero or anti-hero
Duke: Forget about the writers, the fans also have some... wild assumptions
Stephanie: Yeah, like that you're the normal one!
Cass: Or that I'm mute. Just there to give emotional support
Barbara: Or that the most traumatic thing to ever happen to me is framed as something good just because I became Oracle. I barely had one page of dialogue in that entire story!
Tim: At least they get one thing right.
Dick: And that is?
Tim: Bruce.
Jason: Yeah, what is up with that?! It feels like I've become his punching bag! Why is he considered a hero again when he is just plain abusive at this point?
Duke: Patriarchy
Barbara: And male power fantasy
#meta#dc#dc comics#batman#batman comics#metafiction#tim drake#jason todd#dick grayson#damian wayne#damian al ghul#I could have talked more about other issues but if I'd do that I'd be sitting here until tomorrow#cassandra cain#stephanie brown#duke thomas#barbara gordon#robin#red robin#nightwing#dc signal#dc orphan#batgirl#dc spoiler#dc oracle#red hood#bruce wayne#batkids#batsiblings#batfam#batfamily
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3am Prompt/Au Idea
What if, like love evil Dick in DC Vampires, more power to him, but like, imagine for a second...
Bruce, after finding out one of his kids is the self-proclaimed Vampire King, just holds up his hand, gathers up said kids into a room and just-
"I am not mad-" Several exchange looks that are half alarmed and half guilty, seeing as they're unsure why they've been gathered up at this moment. "-nor am I disappointed."
Bruce, fully channeling dad mode, "But what did we agree on for world domination plans?" (Somewhere a snooping hero chokes)
"Not to do it when you're on world so you don't have to at least attempt to stop us?"
"Exactly. Now, which one of you broke the rule and now has new medical information you didn't inform Alfred of...?"
#batman au#prompts#batman#dc#dcu#batfamily#dc vs vampires#vampire dick grayson#batfam prompts#batfam#alfred pennyworth#dick grayson#bruce wayne#jason todd#tim drake#damian wayne#duke thomas#cassandra cain#stephanie brown#the entire batfam#he gathered All of Them into the room#Batfam all know Dick is a vampire but no one else has any clue what happened#Bruce (straight faced to the JL): False alarm meant to breed distrust I tested all of them#Bruce about his kids: Look if you can't beat em join em#“I couldn't stop them from vigilantism when they were children do you think I could stop them taking over the world NOW that they're older?
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Why does he look like that
#i could do this with pretty much any of the bats and it would work but i wanted to bully tim so <3#tim drake#robin#red robin#Stephanie brown#shes tiny but shes there#dc#dc comics#1k
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hot take the only bat who both could and WOULD do the red hood thing better than jason is steph, partially because he thinks it's hilarious and secretly bails her out of whatever trouble she gets in that she can't handle solo. tim hates it, tries to out-hood them for a week, and immediately cringefails himself straight to jail. or the hospital. or both.
Ngl thought we were still talking about this in a reverse robin setting to begin with and it just sounded so cute like
#ask#anon#dc#jason todd#stephanie brown#dc comics#batman#oifaaadoodles#should say jason and steph are still only like 1 to 2 years apart in age here#its just that steph is toll and jason is smol#but yeah I've said before that steph is the only other person who could do the red hood thing#but it would also looking vastly different to how jason does it#and would have to begin vastly differently
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"We're asking for a railing on the staircase!" Duke shouted (Batfamily Chronicles Flash Fiction)
Duke's scream is heard as he slipped while running down the stairs to the bat cave and landed on soft pad Bruce set up for this scenario and that was all he added.
Duke: Bruce, you can cut my wages, lower my insurance premiums or whatever, but I'm asking for a railing around those cursed stairs!
Bruce (focusing on typing at the bat computer): I put a crash pad and nine times out of ten you all land there.
Duke: Nine times out- Who's missed the pad?
Bruce: Dick, Stephanie... Damian one time. I have insurance that can cover those injuries though.
Duke (disbelief): Bruce, how old is Dick?
Bruce (deadpan): 28.
Duke (standing up and shocked): In 28 damn years all you added was a crash pad?
Bruce: A cushioned one... eventually. Yeah Tim's frail body at the time led to that. You're lucky I eventually added one, Alfred had a few slip ups when I first started out.
Duke (louder): Bruce!
Bruce (blase): Walk better.
Tim: Hey, B what's- SHIT!
Tim slipped on the stairs and landed on the crash pad that Duke thankfully stepped off of. Tim groaned, not hurt, but dazed from the landing. Which was better than last time.
Bruce: Good thing he didn't land on you... Not pretty when that happened with Jason and Dick.
Duke: Tsk, man.
#flash fiction#batfamily comedy#batfamily#batman#batfamily chronicles#batfamily shenanigans#headcanon batfamily#batfamily headcanons#batfamily microseries#batfamily fanfiction#microfiction#part of my batfamily microseries#batfamily fic#batfamily funny#batfamily fluff#script fic#batfamily microfiction#Batfamily Chronicles Microseries#DC fanfic#dc fanfiction#batfamily wholesome#part of my fanfiction#bruce wayne#duke thomas#I mean... he added the crash pad at least that's the least the billionaire could do right?#jason todd#batman and robin#tim drake#stephanie brown#damian wayne
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So I know Cass gave Steph Batgirl and bounced right before the reboot due to editorial interference trying to push her out of the family. But it made me think of what an actual passing of the mantle would look like on Cass's terms. Because if she's actually ready to give Batgirl to Steph it's because she's either got the Batman mantle or her ideal next step on the road to being Batman.
So Cass is ready, but she also knows Steph. And she wants Steph to feel confident in taking it. And because she's Cass she's not going to use her words and give Steph an uplifting speech about all the ways she knows Steph will make her legacy proud.
No, she's diving into her deep catalogue of reality trashy TV knowledge and creating The Ultimate Batgirl Trial. Survivor meets Ninja Warrior meets Total Wipeout meets the Chase but if the Chaser catches you due to you messing up questions she punches you in the face. With a splash of Love Island thrown in there because it's important to know how to read people and play them if needed.
Barbara is in charge of monitoring everything to make sure Steph doesn't die. Cass has complete faith in her best friend because she designed this all knowing Steph's abilities. Steph looks at the swinging axes with razor sharp edges and wonders if perhaps she accidentally exaggerated her CV to Cass somehow.
(She passes of course. And only throws up twice. Tim, Damian and Duke all attempt it once they hear about it and none of them make it past the fire breathing dragon statues. Tim gives up at the hologram of Lady Shiva, Damian fails the height requirement to swing on the lava rope and not fall in, Duke actually makes it a respectable amount but again those fire breathing dragon statues are just too vast and uh. Flamey.)
#dc#cassandra cain#batfam#stephanie brown#dc rambles#In canon the passing of the mantle is a complicated mixed bag of emotions for cass.#She's lying with her words during their final conversation and yet she's trying to fit so much#Into the gesture and symbol of giving Steph Batgirl#Meanwhile if Cass could do this entirely on her terms... Well who needs to think about emotions#When you can simply throw flamethrowers at Steph until she looks happier. Simple.
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Jason: You have a problem.
Tim, updating his how-to-take-down-Superman version 14.3 file: No I don’t.
Jason, pointing to step 17c: Uh, yeah, you do.
Tim: Fuuuuuuuuuuuu-
Steph: You two have a problem.
Jason & Tim: No we don’t.
#what do you mean dc doesn’t stand for disregard canon#Jason would be invested in Tim’s little take down everybody files just so he could point out problems#jason todd#tim drake#stephanie brown#batkids
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Please please please do a Duke chart
The Feelings About Duke Thomas Alignment Chart
Jason, Tim, Cass, and Dick versions. Duke unfortunately suffers both from a lack of comics and a lack of interesting interactions - I am extrapolating a lot for everyone on the right side, and some placements are due to personal preference. All I know is that everyone loves him <3. Open to change!
#duke thomas#jason todd#tim drake#cassandra cain#bruce wayne#dick grayson#stephanie brown#damian wayne#barbara gordon#ask#look at the end of the day i do have to push my dick and duke agenda which is why dick is on the right side#their striking similarities (which dick himself has acknowledged) would push dick to the right i think (added to duke's dislike of him)#also jason could be higher but i didn't want him to cover cass and bruce (who have more interactions with him and therefore higher place)#damian cass bruce are DEF the biggest duke fans with jason close runner up#also the time tim and duke were winning a poll over dick and duke like don't make me MAD they haven't had a single good interaction EVER#dc if you're listening pls i need dick duke and dami duke interactions#the poc robin trio could be so good if they wrote it#anyway live laugh love duke thomas
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I feel like steph and Jason have inside jokes.
Steph: God, why the hell do you give more leniency to Damian than anyone else. He's an asshole.
Jason: ... You promise not to tell anyone.
Steph, leaning in: Tell me everything you know right now
Jason: Everytime he gets a little too annoying, a little too up his own ass, I just think - "I fucked your mom", it does wonders to the psyche.
Steph losing her mind : What The fuck
Jason: It also works for Dick, you know how broken up he was about Kori.
Steph: WHAT
later
Steph: damn my moms being really annoying about studying, saying I should get my head down and focus.
Jason : Hey, you should introduce me to her, I'm sure I could find a way to distract her.
Steph : STAY AWAY FROM MY MOM
#stephanie brown#jason todd#batfam#batman#damian wayne#Literally anyone brings up their mom/ex and Jasons looks at Steph and is like- guess if i have#Tim mentions how intense his mom could be and Jason says he would have loved to meet her - Steph starts laughing- Tims confused#Selina breaks up with Bruce - “I know what i must do but i dont know if i have the strength to do it”#dick grayson
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Tim: Oh no! There's TWO Casses! Steph, excited: Wow! Tim: Steph, this is a bad thing. One of them is an imposter. Steph: Oh yeah. Duke with a gun: How do we know which one is the fake? One Cass, pointing at the other Cass: Shoot her! She's the imposter! *everyone immediately shoots the Cass who spoke* Damian: You idiot, giving yourself away like that. Cassandra would NEVER pass up the opportunity to die! Cass: Cass: Is that really how you guys see me? Everyone else: Yes.
#batfam#batfamily#cassandra cain#tim drake#stephanie brown#duke thomas#damian wayne#to be honest since cass can dodge bullets they could shoot at both of them#and the one who gets hit is the imposter (probably)#now to be fair she's not literally so eager to die she would jump at any chance to do so#but cass having a death wish is an integral part of her character#like it was straight up part of her character pitch. her wanting to die for her sins is baked into her very being#...if anyone cares this is not inspired by my earlier post about cass being in three places at once#this has been sitting in my drafts for a month
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theres so many problems with wayne family adventures but honestly the worst crime is making new characters when there are perfectly good ones already existing in canon that they could use and just. don't.
#batfam#batman#wayne family adventures#dick grayson#jason todd#tim drake#cassandra cain#stephanie brown#duke thomas#damian wayne#im really just speaking in the void here but i could probably do a one to one for a lot of them#off the top of my head im only struggling with the goons and margie#and honestly the goons are perfect theyre just Goons
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I like to think that when the batfamily inevitably runs out of money and jobless Bruce, Tim, and Dick* find themselves in financial need, Steph reveals that she's made thousands of dollars taking odd jobs around Gotham City that we just never saw bc Steph hasn't been in a comic for months. Nobody checked in on her and while they weren't looking she made 6 grand babysitting and playing piano at a local theatre. Bruce has to grovel for enough money to buff out a scratch on the batmobile and Steph is revelling in it. This is the closest she's ever going to get to being a supervillain
*(Cass and Jason don't need money to survive on account of being homeless as kids + Babs funds Cass' basic needs and Damian is on his mom's payroll, same w/ duke even if it's obvs not al ghul money)
#ramblings of a lunatic#dc comics#dc#stephanie brown#bruce wayne#tim drake#dick grayson#batfamily#...#wayne family adventures#that seems like something that could happen over there lmao#i already said babysitting and playing piano at a local theatre (NEVER FORGET STEPH CANONICALLY TOOK UP PIANO AGAIN. BATGIRLS 18)#but i can also picture her doing other odd jobs#harper teaches her some basic electrical engineering tips and Steph takes a couple jobs with her for some extra cash#in batgirl 2009 she was working off her tuition by working at her school library so maybe she can do something like that too as well#i like to imagine that off screen steph will work a job for a week then get paid then get fired bc she lets her vigilante life take over#meanwhile Tim's been a dilettant on his houseboat and dick has the leftovers of what alfred gave to him which he gave to charity(?)#and bruce has just been funnelling his last remaining dollars into batman until one day his bat bank account hits negative $50#bruce has been begrudgingly letting Talia pay his rent and groceries for the past few months (damian had to cooerce him into it)#anyway i wish they did more w broke Batman. not that bruce cant survive w/o money but hes usually like. in the wilderness in those scenarios#not a city that i just KNOW has an incredibly fucked up economic situation. i bet it costs $1.95 for bottled water in gotham#anyway. bad headcanons <3
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If you think incest is an inherently lgbt dynamic,there's a good chance you're a white gay who hasn't actually experienced incestous abuse
#i'm thankfully not a victim but my heart goes out to everyone who is especially baby transmascs-i love you and i wish i could've saved you#whoever tells you the first of this unironically wants you to get hurt and if they do it as a joke they don't care if someone else does#please believe me-p.roship is literally propaganda and i got caught up in it too and got lucky to outgrow it before something could happen#incest cw#antiproship#bruce wayne#dick grayson#jason todd#tim drake#cassandra cain#duke thomas#damian wayne#stephanie brown#hiro hamada#tadashi hamada#miles morales#miles g morales#aaron davis#rwby ruby rose#yang xiao long#weiss schnee#winter schnee#percy jackson#nico di angelo#poseidon pjo#hades pjo#ares pjo#stephcass is not batcest y'all cause bruce isn't stephanie's dad but most of the batkids including jason see her as a sister#trans#summerposting
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