#stats stats stats

[isdalinarhot]

I posted 2,348 times in 2022

That's 2,050 more posts than 2021!

485 posts created (21%)

1,863 posts reblogged (79%)

I tagged 1,540 of my posts in 2022

Only 34% of my posts had no tags

#luke.txt - 433 posts

#purple dragon jungle juice - 164 posts

#mr sexy - 95 posts

#hey look an ask - 44 posts

#ssp - 36 posts

#greatest hits - 26 posts

#tlm spoilers - 23 posts

#renarinposting - 23 posts

#dalinar - 22 posts

#kowt spoilers - 21 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#man it’s weird having enough interaction with my mutuals to have to give a heads up when i’m gonna be gone. haven’t had to do that in years

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

I love the absolute zero positive emotions anyone in the fandom has towards Gavilar. Like there are people who really fucking hate Moash but there are a ton of people who love him too (especially on tumblr). All the wlw on my dash wanna get with Raboniel. There are characters that have never done anything positive ever like Sadeas, but at least he’s fun to hate. Gavilar though? Nobody gives a shit about him. The people who have even a smidgeon of opinion about him are like god damn i hate the way he treated Navani and then move on. He is just the boringest guy in the cosmere and what little personality he does have is him being a dickhead

354 notes - Posted March 5, 2022

#4

I hope in a modern au Navani’s relationship to technology is like. everyone in the whole extended Kholin family goes to Navani when they have computer or phone questions and sometimes it’s like Renarin having a very specific bug in his laptop that he wants Navani to look at and sometimes it’s Dalinar going gemheart how do I use email

432 notes - Posted July 21, 2022

#3

Kholins ranked by their willingness and ability to carry my groceries on the long walk from the bus stop to my apartment

Gavilar: would carry my groceries but only because he views me as weak and beneath him. He is doing this to exert power and to flex. 6/10

Navani: would take half of my groceries because “it’s fair that way” but my half would be the half with a gallon of milk in it. Fuck off. 4/10.

Dalinar: depends on the era. Blackthorn era Dalinar would carry my groceries to show off his sick muscles. Bondsmith era Dalinar would carry my groceries because the way of kings probably has a parable about Nohadon carrying groceries to Urithiru or some shit. At any rate, he’s carrying my groceries. 10/10

Evi: would carry my groceries in a heartbeat. Would also fall over from the weight in a heartbeat. She’s trying her best though. Love you Evi. 10/10

Adolin: Adolin has the kind helpful attitude of his mother and the giant strong muscles of his father. He is perfectly engineered to carry groceries and I’ll even let him try a banana afterwards. 12/10

Renarin: Renarin would not actively carry my groceries let’s be real but he would take the bags from me for a handful of seconds while I stop to catch my breath. 5/10

Jasnah: Jasnah would give me a lecture on self reliance and not help and I would be like yes ma’am right away ma’am. 1/10

Elhokar: Elhokar would not be any help at all I would be like hey can you carry my milk and he would be like I Must Become A Better King…,, For My People…… For The Windrunner…… and I’d be like ok! It would be very funny though. 2/10

Aesudan: Aesudan would steal my groceries. 0/10

Gavinor is 5. 0/10

465 notes - Posted May 22, 2022

#2

what is the zellion sweep. i have no clue what it is. help

lets set the scene. its october 2022. tensions are high in the fandom due to a maelstrom of events. we are all at our wits end. i, personally, am going through one of the worst periods of my whole life for non cosmere reasons. we're all tired. we're fucking exausted

and then. i get an email. from the kickstarter. theres one more stretch goal left to reveal. i wonder who it is? kelsier? evi? elhokar? then i read the email. "brandon said "let's add zellion." we are proud to announce our final miniature will be zellion!"

who. the fresh fuck. is zellion.

i am at my wits end, and so is alanamy the-tumblr-user-formerly-known-as-moash, currently tumblr user zellionsweep. they make some silly posts about who the fuck is zellion. i also make some posts like who the fuck is zellion. alanamy zellionsweep tags these posts #ZELLIONSWEEP as a reference to the #MORBIUSSWEEP meme from a few months back.

from there, the lore begins. i make silly posts about zellion's unrequited love for szeth. i make a post claiming that he and dalinar were once lovers. others assert that he has no bitches, he gets no pussy, he receives no cock. he is bisexual. he is biphobic. he is a menace. he's dating moash now. he's secretly kelsier, no, evi, no, aesudan, no, fused dalinar. he's like the wind, he's everywhere and nowhere. nonsensical headcanons are posted under the hashtag #zellionsweep. tumblr user kaladins-simp-list begins compiling a list of all the zellion lore. it is very inconsistent. we all have our own unique interpretations of the character.

zellionsweep escapes containment and ends up on r/cremposting. i find out how many of my tumblr mutuals have reddit accounts. people start flying dangerously close to post limit. we are fucking insane. we needed this. after weeks and weeks of moashcourse and syladin and mistborn era 2 discussion and the ever looming threat of cosmere adaptations and stress and frustration, we finally get to let loose and clown on brand sand for the stupidest decision he has ever made, which is entrusting us with a brand new guy and not telling us anything about him and expecting everyone to be normal about it.

they still shouldve given elhokar a figurine though.

519 notes - Posted October 12, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

I just know that in a modern au Dalinar sends Kaladin inspirational quote graphics from Facebook because he knows Kaladin has depression and he always sends them with a caption like “Thought of you………… made me smile. 🙂 Life Before Death Soldier………….” and Kaladin thinks it’s genuinely sweet even if the corny quotes do not offer him any solace but the SECOND Adolin finds out about it he’s like. Kaladin you HAVE to send me all of these this is the funniest shit ever

527 notes - Posted April 3, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[smashorpass50plus]

For those curious:

Our lowest 3 smash are

2.4 for the Elon Musk poll

2.7 for the charles III

4.6 dor Ellen Degeneres

Our highest 3 smash are

95.5 for the second Sigourney Weaver poll

93 for the Appalachian Moutains

92 for the type 30 rotary phone

[flawlessflesh]

demon king laios, who made the world his enemy

[neproxrezi]

harry dubois would end death note in one episode. he'd be unkillable bc he has no fucking idea what his name is and then he'd go drink driving and accidentally run light over and the killings would mysteriously stop

[thewrittenpodcast]

THANK YOU AO3 VOLUNTEERS WE SAY IN UNISON

[allskywalkerswhine]

in fics where luke gets plopped into the prequels i want every jedi within ten metres of him to think hes the weirdest jedi theyve ever seen. he has negative lightsaber form. he doesnt know what a kata is. he handstands when he meditates. his solution to sith is to try and have a chat. hes a political radical who keeps suggesting revolution. you ask him what the jedi code is and he says "kindness and compassion and helping those in need :) ". you ask how he used the force like that and he says some shit about how you are a luminous being limited only by your mind. the councils authority is just a suggestion. he is somehow the new favourite of both qui gon and yoda

[notherpuppet]

Sloppy comic based on me and my friends conversation on my bday last week 😝🥳 this is pretty much verbatim hahaha

[wanderingcas]

people are really looking at stats to determine if a fic is worth reading? no wonder fics that never got popular at the first drop never had a chance 💀

[to-be-a-dreamer]

So I already made a full post about the Wild Life spreadsheet but it was more of a user manual than anything and I just needed to be sure everyone gets to see just how bonkers insane this session was because I-

Insanity. Chaos. I need an entire SMP based on this premise

[xsdepresso]

[egophiliac]

(looks at upcoming card releases)

I'm in danger :)

[noughticalcrossings]

Put thee not on Silent

[ID: A 4 panel comic made of digital paintings of a zoom meeting between the knights of the Round Table.

Sir Galahad, Queen Guinevere, Sir Gawain, Sir Lancelot, Sir Bedivere, have their own individual screens, and one screen shows a conference room with King Arthur, Sir Mordred, and others who are not named.

Both Sir Lancelot and Queen Guinevere have their cameras turned off, and microphones muted, the entire time.

Panel 1 shows King Arthur with a few of his knights, with Sir Mordred brooding beside him in shadows, and a hand reaching from offscreen to steal snacks from a bowl.

Sir Galahad has his microphone muted, and is in a forest, looking up and to the side. He has brown hair up above his head and very pale skin.

King Arthur asks, "Sir Gawain, canst thou see the PowerPoint slides?"

Panel 2 shows Sir Gawain, who has brown skin, black hair, green clothes, and heterochromia, with one green eye and one dark, replies, "Verily I cannot, I think it be a miasma of the sight."

Behind him for the background is a section from the Green Knight manuscript, showing faded lettering and a green knight on a green horse standing in front of someone with a large axe while a crowd of spectators watch from the sides.

Sir Galahad's screen is now slightly motion-blurred, showing a reddragon's open mouth in front of Sir Galahad's face.

Panel 3 shows Sir Bedivere, labeled Tech Support, who wears a blue shirt and a plumed knight's helm, looking exhaustedly into the camera, pushing his helmet visor up with one hand. He is lit by blue light and has bags under his eyes, asking: "Hast thou sharest the screen?"

His background is of a library. Sir Galahad's screen is now taken up by the motion-blurred side of the dragon that is attacking him.

Panel 4 shows Sir Gawain turned slightly to the side, looking derisively at the camera, saying: "Yea, but I cannot hear Sir Galahad."

The only thing left in Sir Galahad's screen is the motion-blurred, spade shaped tail tip of the dragon chasing him.

End ID.]

Description very kindly added by @describe-things

[crowley1990]

Let’s take some tumblr population sample statistics

I just want to know the age breakdown of this website so reblog please

[draculings]

an incredibly sensitive instrument.