#spilled milk reviews

[that-weird-girl-everyone-ignores]

The Black Phone: 4/5 ⭐️

Did they say “mint” in the ‘70s?

[bojackhorsemanobviously]

[last-of-the-jaded]

My sense of humor is literally just Spilling the Milk, Scamboli Reviews and Michael Reeves, combined.

[goodoldfashionedengineer]

The Batfam and the Cursed Furby

It all started when Bruce allowed the kids to choose a tie for him to wear on the next gala.

So they rummage through his closet, trying to find the ugliest one.

And then they find it: A bright pink Furby with blue ears and feet, seemingly asleep.

Cass picks it up and asks what it is.

The others explain it to her, some even complaining about how these things never seem to shut up and that they're lucky that it looks like the battery had run out.

No one knows whose it is.

Bruce doesn't know either.

So they put it back where they had found it.

Two days later, Tim goes up to the kitchen while he's working on a case. He opens the fridge, until he hears from behind him

"FURBY WANTS TO PLAAAAYYY"

Spilling the milk all over the floor. Tim sighs, walks over to the Furby and removes the batteries.

A week later Damian goes into the bathroom and over to the bathroom cabinet. When he opens it, he sighs, the pink monstrosity, dancing and screaming "FURBY IS HUNGRYYYY".

He takes it, searches for the off switch, can't find one, so instead tries to remove the batteries.

There aren't any.

He confronts Bruce, asking how these toys can run on no energy. Bruce doesn't know and tells him to put it back where he found it.

Another two week later, Bruce is racing home in the Batmobile. He has to take a sharp turn- and press on the brakes full force. Something flies over the passenger seat.

"WUHUUU. AGAIN. AGAIN"

The robotic voice thrills.

At home he confronts his children.

Everyone denies having put it in the Batmobile. They share how they have all found it in various places. Some have kicked it, some have thrown it against the wall, everyone has put it in the garbage can at least once by now.

It keeps coming back.

Bruce sighs, being absolutely done with this and says when no one wants to stand up for it, then they'll just have a look at the cameras.

No one comes forward, so they all go to review the footage.

They skip and skip and skip- until-

The Furby just suddenly appeared in the Batmobile.

Nobody was there, just from one second to the next, it just appeared, staring right back at the camera.

Bruce immediately contacts a lot of his superhero friends, magicans, telepaths, mediums, aliens, all of them.

Every single one of them tell him that it is a normal Furby and there is absolutely nothing cursed about it.

The Pink Plague still haunts them to this day

[becquerel]

Announcing our drinks for the upcoming Homestuck x Requiem Cafe collaboration! First off is the Batterwitch Latte - A cake flavored latte using actual Betty Crocker ingredients (don't tell John) / Next drink at the Homestuck x Requiem Cafe celebration is the Strawberry Lalonde: Strawberry and Rose Lemonade topped with Sprite (Tastes like therapeutic gnostalgia) / Drink the rich with the High Blood: a Blackberry Butterfly Tea topped with Lavender Lemonade

Gamebro gives this drink 1.5 hats: Enjoy an exclusive soda built for gaming (Green Apple Mtn Dew) / Gamebro couldn't review this one because they spilled a Sburb Soda Beta all over their keyboard, but this one is a Dragonfruit Mtn Dew Code Red

It's Apple Juice. There's also a Candy Apple Cold foam. But it's Apple Juice. Don't be sus. / Only for the cryptically clever, we have a Rose Milk Tea with a Sweet Matcha Cold Foam

From Requiem Cafe's official Twitter! (Link in replies)

[arcsin27]

theres a super cool niche channel called Arcsin (i think arcsin27 should help pull it up instead of math tutorials), he mostly does lets plays or whatever shitpost pops into his head

Need to source some new YouTubers. Anyone know of any free range, GMO friendly ones?

[baenyth]

Bethany's Bizarre Miraculous Reviews Episode 4-20: Qilin

Ah yes, the episode where Sabine gets harassed by a racist guy. Also funny numbers!

It just dawned on me how much Sabine lore we're getting here. I feel like we know more about Tom than we do her. And I love it! I love being given lore for side characters, even if it's just how they start their day!

She knew Marinette would fall! Swag!

Chocolate turbine drama!

She knew Marinette would spill the milk! Double swag!

Oh, and it's Mother's Day as well. That fits the timeline I have.

Sabine's painting class being in the school fits the local vibe once more. More evidence for my "Amusement Park and small town Paris" theory.

So people know Ladybug and Chat Noir are kids. Oh gravy.

Asshole

No way! Sabine has Ladybug vision as well!

Oh. The animation has gotten worse.

Oh god it's him

Why is he such an asshole? What the fuck is his deal?

A lot of Adrien signs...

Lawful stupid

That's all it took for her to give in? I mean if I were Poopmoth I'd put it on the house.

In hindsight, with how Roger's acting it's easy to see where Sabrina gets her amorality from.

Nah, don't give him anything. He's a jackass. Don't punish yourself for giving your mother a gift on mother's day.

Honestly, even if Truman Show theory is true and Hawkmoth was never redeemed and is going to suffer, this racist adult was treated as more redeemable than the teenaged Chloe. Grumblegrumblegrumble. This is poorly-done ACAB. At least have him get hit by some stuff or thrown in the sewers when Chat Noir accidentally picks the wrong person or something.

Edit: Almost forgot: Is that Lila cameo the most we're going to see of her in this season? Where the hell did all the fuss of "Alya thinking Marinette is just jealous of Lila when she knows Marinette is Ladybug" come from? Season 5? How many lines was it?

[sterekchub]

Jock Derek decides to get into the competitive eating game. Starts a YouTube channel. Gets some fans, who suggest crazy eating challenges. Derek keeps pushing himself to fulfill all the ridiculous challenges, but his stomach is so stretched out that he’s hungry all the time. Starts gaining weight. Slowly, his eating challenges videos just become mukbangs as Derek goes from jock to exjock to chub…and eventually Derek starts showing off his growing belly as he goes from chub to just huge fatty.

"W-Welcome ...*BBBRRRpp*... to Eatin' ...*blurrrRPPP*... w-with ...*BRRRPPpp*... Derek

10 Viewers "Hey...I'm Derek. I twisted my ankle during practice so the Coach benched me for the semester and if I don't play, I don't get money towards my tuition. So umm....I'm not sure how this works but my friend makes money gaming on his channel so I thought maybe....I'd start reviewing local restaurants or campus food or something."

You turn off the chat, disinterested. There's enough bad food ASMR and mukbangers online, he's attractive, but nothing special. You have better things to do than watch him fumble his way to unwrapping a Chipotle takeout bag like it was something special.

50 Viewers You find yourself back on Derek's channel a week later. He still looks uncomfortable in front of a camera. His room isn't even set up to stream, a bunch of random lights behind him and his dinner clearly on the desk next to him, 2 liter of soda and some Pop-Tart boxes. You're about to click away when the otherwise dead-chat pings:

Try the 2L soda challenge!

Derek nods and brings the soda bottle up to his lips. "Easy," he brags, suddenly much more confident and you get the aura of a cocky, self-assured jock. He chugs the entire bottle down within 2 minutes, waving the empty bottle in front of the screen and letting out a long burp. "Done. Damn, I need some pizza after that..."

He goes back to sitting there in mostly awkward silence as he scrolls on his phone, clearly ordering food. You leave the stream again. 200 Viewers You can't help it - you check back into Derek's stream. He's gained more followers in the last few weeks since you saw him and you see the last few videos he's posted all see to have a theme - Eating Challenges with Derek.

Looks like he's been eating well. There's more softness to his jaw and cheeks and the sports T-shirt he's wearing looks stretched a little tight.

"Tonight I'm trying the milk chugging challenge - one gallon in one hour."

The chat is more active than usual.

Got Oreos to go with that?

Derek holds up 3 boxes "not going to get through all that milk without them."

Gotta love jocks who eat like they're still training

if he pukes, I'm leaving

Bet he's done this before

Derek finishes 2 boxes of oreos and the entire gallon of milk, ending the stream reclining in his chair looking satisfied, hands rubbing his milk-swollen gut.

500 Viewers Derek has become your new favorite streamer. You're not sure if he knows the chat is entirely full of feeders egging him on, but he clearly loves the attention and is willing to do almost anything for donations.

"Thank you to *feedemup72* for the donation, tonight's challenge is $100 at Taco Bell." He points at several bags sitting next to him. "Actually $108 because I got 3 sodas, hope you don't mind."

Only his top half is visible as his streams, but in the last few months he's developed a curve to his belly that presses into his computer desk.

damn he's gotten fat in a few months

ii hope he does the donut challenge next

Derek slows down when he's three quarters of the way through. He shoves the last bite of a burrito into his mouth and groans. "Don't think I can do this one." He's got rice spilled onto the front of his shirt, and a few inches of bare, furry belly are visible where his bloated stomach is pushing his shirt upwards.

You're feeling reckless and type into the chat '$20 if you can finish 3 more burritos." You can see the determination as he leans forward to grab another from the pile, like it's the winning point his team needs. "Uggh I might burst..."

1000 Viewers "I'm getting a little chunky," Derek laughs, standing up in front of his computer with both hands lifting up his pudgy middle. It's not only his middle that has gotten thicker. His jeans look painted on and his shirt is so tight you can see the lovehandles just starting to poke out over his jeans. "Hope the coach doesn't mind. Got my clear bill of health for my leg so practice starts again tomorrow." are you still going to stream? Sure the coach won't mind you waddling on the field? forget sports, fatboy, you were made to eat! "This might be my last one in a while, practice keeps me busy. But for my last challenge- I got a cake to celebrate!" It's just a plain cheesecake, but Derek looks at it like it's better than sex. The little groans of pleasure he makes when he takes a bite somehow feel dirtier than watching him devour the entire thing in under 45 minutes. 3,000 Viewers It's been almost 6 months since Derek's last stream and you've almost forgotten about his channel entirely when you see he's gone live again. His follower count has almost triple and the chat is swarming with excitement at his return. OMG finally he's got to be 300 by now has he said anything no he's been eating for almost an hour! Think he knows he's live? Are you okay? You can't take your eyes off the screen. Derek has Chinese takeout containers in front of the screen and is digging into them like he hasn't eaten for months. The arms on his gamer chair are no longer visible under hefty love handles and his belly is fully resting into his lap by several inches. Derek keeps eating, double chin wobbling with each fast-paced bite, until he finally stops to reach for a can of soda. He drains it in one go and then looks at the chat, still shoveling food in his mouth as he talks "c-coach ...*mnfgghhhulp*... kicked ...*mmnnch*... me ...*chew... o-off ...*nibble*... de ...*gnaw*... team." I'm sorry too fat for the team? Look at him- he's not running anywhere! He hasn't stop eating What a fucking pig You have to know, typing in the chat. "$50 if you tell us what you're weighing in at." You watch as Derek scans the chat and reads your message. He finally puts down the food and stands up to show himself off to he chat. "Three-twenty-seven." From the size of his hips and ass as he turns, you would have guessed closer to 350. He looks upset, pinching and grabbing at the excess blubber that's thickened him up everywhere, but when he sits back down and grabs another soda, he almost looks relieved. "So.. guess I'm back to streaming. Any suggestions for another *gulp* *swallow* food challenge? 5,000 Viewers Doesn't look like a jock anymore he's a fucking blimp any ideas how to blow him up more bet he'd eat straight lard if we paid him fuck look at that gut Did he really just fall asleep? bet he wakes up and starts eating again You're $500 poorer- but looking at the size of Derek, it seems like money well spent. In the last three months, you've paid Derek to do the ice cream gallon challenge, the milkshake challenge, the donuts-burger challenge, and the carbo-load challenge. And you were also to blame for the current stream. Tonight had proven too much even for his monstrous appetite and he had needed a break, too full to even speak, just sitting in front of the computer groaning and grunting and burping, rubbing his boulder of a belly until his overstuffed moans had turned into tree-splitting levels of snoring. The last quarter of his fifth footlong cheesesteak (With extra cheese and meat of course), fell out of a pudgy hand and onto the floor. Derek had weighed in at 398 last night, and you impatiently wait for him to wake up rounding out the scales at over 400lbs of blubber. 10,000 Viewers

This stream was a special one. Derek had tipped the scales at a whopping 500lbs, reluctantly heaving himself out of his bench-sized seat to show off for the chat just where all of those pounds had piled on to. Face swollen with fat, his jawline completely obscured by chins and a tire-sized neck. Thighs wider than his former waist, and of course, the unmistakable belly which was not so round and lard-filled it rested on his knees when he was sitting. "Finally hit a follower milestone," Derek wheezed proudly, wiping sweat off his forehead from the exertion of just standing for several minutes and then collapsing back down into his seat. It creaked ominously. On instinct, you check his Amazon wishlist. Candy, funnel, XXXXXXXXL shorts, more candy, bariatric scale...huh. No bench. Guess he thought the one hw as currently straining was going to last longer than it sounded like. "So someone sponsored to me to eat a hundred-thousand calories, one for each follower!" You thought you misheard. 100,000? That can't possible be right. And Derek was popular sure, but with a niche group. You double-check and his follower count was sitting at 10,002. Confused, you check the chat. did he say 100,000!!? looking and thinking like a pig no one said jocks were smart That's going to take days think he'll realize? too late to back out, he took the money That's like 30 pounds of calories. No way is he going to do it! Derek was reading the chat and checking his phone in confusion. "I did...misread a bit there." Do it eat it 100,000 blimp he's gonna pop come on fatty, EAT EAT EAT! Derek still looks confused, but puts his phone away and smacks a hand to his belly. "I can handle it. Better start now..." You can't watch the entire stream, having to pull yourself away at some point to go to bed and go to work. You haven't missed much - Derek sits at his computer, struggling to his feet every few hours to get his latest food delivery he doesn't bother to turn off the livestream and everyone gets' a perfect view of Derek's swinging, wobbling obese frame as he slowly shuffles in and out of view. Even at night, he waddles out of view to go to bed but leaves the stream running, his snores rattling around the empty room and the only view the staggering amount of fast food containers thrown haphazardly everywhere. Think he'll reach 600? he's too fat to stop now he should eat like this all the time It takes Derek 2 days to eat it all. Even for someone used to all the eating challenges, Derek was eating with a frenzy and a determination you'd never seen. The chat kept his calorie counter for him, and he was absolutely struggling to keep on pace, looking like every bite was a Herculean effort. You tune back in, the afternoon when Derek is down to his last 2,000 calories in a bag of greasy burgers and fries and milkshakes. He looks bloated and fat in a way you've never seen, like at any minute he was going to just start expanding and become a fat filled-balloon the size of the room. His body was clearly protesting, Derek had to keep taking longer and longer breaks inbetween to massage his belly, although he couldn't fully reach around it. Gurgling farts and thunderous belches that chat kept telling him meant he had room for more. 100,000 calories. Almost done. Just a few more... Derek guzzled down the rest of his milkshake and looked triumphantly at his camera, eyes glazed over and face smeared with food.

T-Told ...*puff*... ...*BRRPFFBLTTT*... you ...*uhhnngh*... ...*thbbbt*... I ...*hmphhh*... ...*Brrbllpfft*... c-could ...*blurrRRPPP*... ...*Splrrpffrtbtlt*... do ...*BRRRPPphh*... ...*Frrrpffltbtt*... it.

[olderthannetfic]

https://olderthannetfic.tumblr.com/post/736909077202993152/damn-that-goodreads-discourse-though-short-wo#notes

Actually gotta agree with one of the commenters here. It's good that the review bomber got called out and dropped from publishing, but if the victims involved were clearly like "We wanna deal with this on our own" even if by the end it was just one of them, it's still kinda shitty to make an entire video about it using all the victims names, and their books to shame and callout the review bomber. Putting yourself as the saviour to spread all the names because you decided you didn't wanna stay silent any longer, even if you weren't actually one of the affected is just kinda overstepping.

Since the person who did it is a REAL BIG NAME on social media, the victims are pushed into the limelight regardless of how they wanted to deal with this. Even if they didn't want that attention at all, and just wanted it to quietly get it worked out somehow. The social media person had, tbh, no right to drop a vid with all the victims names and works, if they didn't get the go ahead by everyone involved, if they already made it clear they wanna deal with it on their own. It's also a bit too much to use these people, their names, and their works as a step to argue about poc in the writing industry, to point even more fingers about how pitiful victims they are. Not sure how to explain it, but it's another talk I feel the victims themselves should have if they want to, not have someone else start for them. Social media person could use themselves as an example, or people who've been open about this if that's a thing they want to talk about, not drag the review-bomber victims further into this.

Even if one of the victims is now super uncomfortable with the attention, and the new influx of people who're leaving reviews just to be nice, they can't say something because it'll be taken by people as being "ungrateful" and other shit. Now they're in a spot where they gotta be all nice, where they get a constantly influx of pity ratings and followers.

They're now the helpless victims who needed a big name to do the work for them, and deal with it for them because they just couldn't handle it themselves.

Maybe just me, but I feel like the social media person should have asked if the victims wanted to be featured and let them do the talking, or at least show they got consent from them to do what they did. Social media person could also have done this without extra highlighting the victims too, leave them alone so they can heal from this and just go back to normal.

Heck, maybe do an extra social media video just "incidentally" talking and featuring the books, to not tie their names and works completely to that drama.

Victims often are expected to be grateful to their saviours even if they didn't ask for it, nor wanted it. Society is weird like that, and now getting an actual honest answer as to if it was ok is gonna be impossible. Yes, I'm saying it's impossible because now the cats out the bag, so is there a point crying over spilled milk? Gotta grin and bear it now even if you didn't want to.

Victim is also a title that follows you for the rest of your known career. Someone finds out you were a victim? They'll never forget it, it'll always be an association with your name.

(With those lasts parts I'm from some experience in my private/career life.)

I don't have a twitter, so Idk if maybe there was a tweet where they got all the consent for it, but until then I'll just be kinda critical of how this was done.

--

That's not really how I read this video, to be honest.

[cocogrrrl]

kamusta :)) could I req what it would be like to be besties w Tweek and work at his parents’ coffeeshop together? Platonic pls (omg a craig cameo would be chef’s kiss too) and thank u!!!!! <333

coffee

(headcanons and drabbles!) what it's like working with tweek at the coffeehouse :D special creek part in the end

tweek x co-worker + gn!reader (platonic), craig x tweek no cws wc: 1140

an: ayos lang anon! i thoroughly enjoyed myself while writing this :3

The first day you started working there, Tweek was extremely nervous about you finding out about the bag of meth they have in the back.

You didn’t find out, though—at least not yet. You just assumed it was flavoring or sugar or something since they put it in all their drinks.

Anyways, Tweek was rather distant and cold to you during your first few weeks working there, only conversing with you when you needed help.

It’s not like he was avoiding you, though. He just didn’t know how to approach you at all. Like, zero clue. If he was being honest, he thought you didn’t want anything to do with him anyway. That’s why he never really bothered to be friends with you, just acquaintances at most.

That all changed when one of the customers had a big order for you two.

“So, three cappuccinos, one Americano, four flat whites, two lattes, and three black coffees?” You asked, looking at the list of orders in front of you. A few customers were waiting in line as well, so not only did you have to make them perfectly, but you had to do it as quick as you can as well. “That’s correct. I’ll need them to go in 15 minutes.” They said, handing you the money. “Alright,” you worriedly hummed, putting on the best calm face you could. Couldn’t they just have called in advance? Whatever. You looked at Tweek, who was just across the station. He had just served someone their drink. “Tweek! Can you help me out here?” You called, giving the person back their change. In his usual nervous matter, he nodded and rushed by you. “U-Uh, sure! What is it?” “We have a big order.” You said, waving the list of drinks the customer had ordered. He took a short glance at it, eyes quickly scanning the list. “Let’s split it. I’ll handle the lattes and flat whites while you do the rest?” You said, already rushing to steam the milk. “Okay! I’ll get right to it—ack!” He nodded, readying the cups.

Luckily for the customer, you two were efficient and quick and got it all done in time—although with some minor accidents (Tweek spilled some coffee on you because he jittered a tad bit too much).

Your service was rewarded, and they gave you a gracious tip—about 20 dollars, almost half of the price of their order.

“Phew,” you smiled at the blonde, wiping the sweat that fell to your forehead with your forearm. “Glad that’s over with.” “Yeah,” he nodded, returning the smile to you. “I’m so sorry for s-spilling coffee on you, dude.” You shook your head, giving him a pat on the back. “No worries. It’s nothing that vinegar can’t fix.” You said, taking a quick glance once more at your coffee-stained shirt. Good thing it wasn’t a personal favorite of yours, so you didn’t totally mind if it got wrecked.

After all that, you and Tweek slowly became a lot closer!!

You came to learn that he actually hated his job LMAO

He didn’t like it since it was more of a chore from his parents, than an actual job. He worked there even long after the coffeehouse closed for the day.

You felt bad for him, which was why you offered to work overtime whenever he did. Of course, he quickly shut that idea down, not wanting to be a hassle to you—even if you made it clear that you didn’t mind.

Whenever you two aren’t doing anything, Tweek would help you out with schoolwork. He was incredibly smart, on the same level as your other classmates Kyle and Wendy.

“Tweek, you amaze me.” You pouted as you watch him answer his math assignment with no difficulty. “Ack—it’s nothing…” He mumbled, not looking up from his work. “I just review our material early.” “Well, on the topic of homework,” you chuckled, some sort of specific intent behind it as you pulled out your physics textbook. “Can you help me out on this? It’s on vectors…” You nervously laughed as you flipped to the page with the topic. “Oh, uh, sure!” He nodded. “L-Let me finish my math first.” Needless to say, it didn’t too long to wait for him.

Craig would often go there to spend time with Tweek, especially during busier weeks when his parents made him work there over time.

You’d watch their little interactions together as you were making your respective customer’s order.

As you tended to someone’s drink, you spotted a certain someone approaching the register. You already know who it was. “Hi, honey.” Craig smiled at his boyfriend, his arm resting on the counter. “Hello, Craig!” Tweek chirped. “Are you ordering the—gah!—usual?”  “Mhm,” he nodded, sliding the cash to Tweek. “Alright,” Tweek sang-song, quickly making Craig’s typical three-shot, added sweetener latte. From the corner of your eye, you saw him expertly make latte art, the milk forming a little guinea pig as he swiveled around the cup. For a brief moment, Tweek headed to the back, saying that he needed to get something. In that short time, Craig nonchalantly greeted you. “Hey, YN.” He said as you rested by the edge of the counter, idly waiting for a customer to come in. You shared a few classes with him, but you didn’t really know much about him other than the fact he was the president of the astronomy club and that he had been dating Tweek for years now. “Hi, Craig.” You hummed, sliding the drink Tweek had prepared for him. He got the drink and nodded to you. “Thanks.” “No problem.” You gave him a polite grin. Tweek aptly came back—thank god. It’s not that you didn’t like Craig, you just didn’t know how to handle idle conversation. “I have something for you.” Tweek giggled, hands behind his back as he hid something from Craig. “Hmm? What is it, babe?” He peered in, leaning on the counter to see what he had for him. “Close your eyes.” Craig had his eyes shut, palms out open as he waited for whatever surprise his boyfriend prepared.  You saw Tweek place a small pouch in his hand. Your interest was piqued now as well. What was in the bag? You watched them leisurely though, seemingly like you didn’t care. Craig opened his eyes and gently lifted the bag with the tips of his fingertips, pulling it open as he reached for what was in it—a bracelet with the constellation Andromeda lying in the middle. Tweek mentioned that it was a personal favorite of his once. His eyes shone, a smile cracking at his lips as he put the jewelry on. “Tweek…” “D-Do you like it?” He asked, shifting his weight between his feet. “I love it, dear.” He hummed, collecting Tweek’s hands in his. “Thank you.”

[ask-alsius-vafer]

*Three feet away from Alsius as he worked, was Andrew. He was currently holding his tongue, though the excitement was evident on his face. As soon as Als was less preoccupied with his healing duties, Andrew immediately launched back into his introduction of what the conjured picnic basket on his arm contained.

The basket, wicker with two wooden flapped lids, was well made. It was a speciality spell Andrew had seen his sisters perform many times over in the years since he was a child. Those baskets were always filled to the brim with farm-fresh goods from their modest patch of land. This one, however, comprised of items plucked from the Ravenclaw table—slices of toast, baguette, and waffles tucked in together with small jars of compote in flavours of raspberry, strawberry, cherry, blackcurrant, and apricot. He had also carefully wrapped several streaks of bacon in brown parchment paper, leaving just enough space for a large glass of milk with an anti-spilling charm cast over it.*

…if I were to choose Als, I’d go for the blackcurrant. But let me know if this isn’t to your liking, I can bring some eggs, mushrooms, sausages, and beans next time! And cheese! Although, I’ve heard rumours to stay away from cheese these days…

*Andrew trailed off but then held out the basket with both hands, his eager face lit up by expectant round eyes.*

Finishing the last of his duties, Alsius quietly deposited the completed charts into the appropriate trays to be reviewed. When he turned, he stopped short, brows raising in surprise at Andrew’s unexpected presence. With his roommate’s healthy appetite and sensible exercise habits (and rather impressive skill at evasion), he rarely visited the infirmary. In fact, the only time Alsius remembered healing him was when…

Well.

Alsius cleared his throat and returned Andrew’s warm smile, his expression placidly friendly in the face of such irrepressible eagerness. It was no surprise. From Alsius’s observations — minus a bit of skittishness — Andrew’s personality was firmly entrenched in pure joie de vivre. Not to mention his love of food was particularly renowned. In fact, if Andrew displayed any less enthusiasm when explaining the basketful of offerings, then Alsius could only assume he was truly unwell.

“It all looks delicious, but is this…this isn't all for me, is it?” A slight flush warmed the hollow of his throat as he stepped closer and peeked into the proffered basket. “I couldn’t possibly eat it all before it goes off...”

It wasn’t a comment made out of modesty. It was the truth, though he didn’t want Andrew to think he was rebuffing his generosity.

“Would you perhaps want to share? I’m just finishing my shift and I have time before my next class,” he asked as he lowered the wooden lid. Despite his calm demeanour, the warmth crept further up the column of his neck. He still didn’t understand why being on the receiving end of acts of kindness and simple social interactions brought such internal fluster. “It would be a shame for any of it to go to waste.”

[that-weird-girl-everyone-ignores]

Causeway Review: Stop Burying Your Gays

*SPOILERS*

I want to start by saying the review has nothing to do with the performance of the actors; they all did a phenomenal job. 

All in all, it was a good film with great acting and a very bad decision that ultimately lead to its downfall. 

I’ll explain:

When Lynsey and James go out for the first time together for burgers, later on in the evening Lynsey says to James,

“I don’t have boyfriends. I have girlfriends. I mean, not right now, but when I do, that’s what I have.”

She quite literally told him she was gay and he said “okay cool” and the movie continued. No problems. If anything, at that moment the plot became immensely better- not because the character was gay, but because the movie became about a budding platonic friendship between a man and a woman. Something we don’t see much of- especially not with beautiful actors like Jennifer Lawrence.

However, later when they were hanging out together at a pool she had cleaned during the day, it all changed.

The scene started off really sweet and vulnerable; we saw James take off his prosthetic leg to go swimming and Lynsey hug James in the pool after him opening up to her further about his accident. Then she kissed him and it ruined the entire scene. And when he asked her why she bluntly stated, “I felt bad for you.” Which- even if that was true and that was why Lynsey kissed him- it still completely disregarded the fact she had previously come out as gay earlier on in the film. Yes, sexuality is obviously fluid, but in this film they made it a point for her to say “I don’t have boyfriends, I have girlfriends.” Which made it clear she was not interested in a relationship with James. If they would have vetoed that conversation between James and Lynsey, there would be absolutely no confusion and the audience would have been none the wiser. But they didn’t and it seemed as if someone forgot to cut that scene out or that it was forced to be kept in because of how the character was written. Regardless, somebody couldn’t figure out any other way to drive a conflict between Lynsey and James other than to ruin a beautiful and vulnerable moment between two friends by having the lesbian kiss the guy. Not to mention at the end Lynsey brings back James’ idea of her moving in with him because she’s “trying to make a friend.” If she would have never kissed James, the ending would have been a lot more innocent.

To make matters even worse, it was revealed by the film’s casting director, Ellen Chenoweth, that there was originally a flashback scene of Lynsey in Afghanistan. They shot the entire thing with several characters cast, including Samira Wiley, whose character was romantically involved with Lynsey. Ellen stated in an interview

“So there was a romance in this film, and then the woman was killed, which was a huge loss for Jennifer’s character. It was a large part of the movie and a big thing we worked on.”

Essentially, what would have been a pivotal and amazing scene to help portray more of Jennifer Lawrence’s character, the entire thing was cut, and instead, the still image we see when we pull the movie up on Apple+ is of Lynsey and James in the pool together.

It really takes “Bury Your Gays” to an extreme by cutting them out of the plot before they even have a chance to die in the movie.

[malleablemusic]

in the spirit of remaining genuine and honest in this article, i will be fully transparent and say i have heard the titular song of this album and am obsessed and in love with it, but i've never cared to listen to the rest because i no longer have a good relationship with the boy who introduced me to neutral milk hotel. because of our falling out i now have (perhaps misguided) negative notions of the people i picture to be fans of neutral milk hotel. i am now braving a listen through of this album due to my passion for using this blog to expand my mind/break down barriers of preconceived notions i have, but also because my boyfriend's best friend highly praised it, and he is a good man :) anyways, heres my review of in the aeroplane over the sea by neutral milk hotel:

king of carrot flowers pt. 1: 4.2/5 stars

the second it started with "when you were young" i knew i would be emotional

the imagination of childhood... and how it naturally disappears for us all as we grow up..but specifically this song insinuating it happening because of the domestic/family abuse the "king of carrot flowers" experienced...ouch

love how tender is sounds. how he sings is so raw and makes the awful story he's telling sound sweet

king of carrot flowers pt. 2: 3.9/5 stars

oh. where did jesus christ come from

"mouths open wide and spilling snow/ i will spit until i learn how to speak" and "i will shout until they know what i mean" perfectly encapsulates the feeling of not being able to communicate your anger

in the aeroplane over the sea: 5/5 stars

when i first heard this song, i sobbed and wasnt sure why. after hearing it a thousand times since, i know why the song feels so tragic. i heard it when i was 19 and in my freshman year of college. i think that was truly when i understood how important of a time my teens to early twenties were, and felt afraid that it was slipping away or i would blink and miss it.

"but for now we are young/ let us lay in the sun/ and count every beautiful thing we can see" i vowed to remain curious and appreciative of my youth. never discount the small joys in life !

"cant believe how strange it is to be anything at all" i wish i could scream this off a rooftop

two-headed boy: 4.4/5 stars

was immediately reminded of the two-headed calf poem, and my chest caved in

i am really in love with the way he shout sings, and especially how they do not seem to fix the clipping that happens when he does

i like the way he pronounces the "k" sounds so sharply

the fool: 4.2/5 stars

obsessed with the imperial sounding trumpets, feels like a king is marching in but instead im picturing a jester walking down towards the throne

feels like it belongs to the soundtrack of a movie

holland, 1945: 3.8/5 stars

i kind of wish i didnt google the song title first, because it made me more confused.

i do love how the song paints the picture of an profound story

communist daughter: 2/5 stars

did he. did he just say what i think he did. i had to pause and collect myself. "semen stains the mountaintop" HUHhhh?

no i wont lie i dont know what the song is about and tbh i dont care to?

oh comely: 3.2/5 stars

i would love to know what this man' sounds like when h's speaking voice sounds like. i wonder if he always rounds out his syllabus soo much (if so, love that) and also where his accent originates from

just as i was typing that i felt there wasnt enough modulation and i was bored, he did that high noooote (or his attempt at one) and i kind of love that it sounded so hard for him and his voice barely went up in register HAH. sounds like its really coming from the depths of his soul

ok. no actually what is this man's obsession with mentioning semen. "smelling of semen all under the garden" dude what actually is your problem that is a CRAZY line

ghost: 3.3/5 stars

i like the drums that come in at "and she was born in a bottle-rocket in 1929" and how its a delayed drum entrance

doesnt sound different enough from the rest of the songs it followed to be specially noted in any way tbh

[untitled]: 4.5/5 stars

i genuinely love pipes (apparently this song uses a uillean pipe) and think modern music needs to utilize its fantastic sound more, loving this so much

two-headed boy pt.2: 4/5

i really enjoy the two part songs, the narrative this album weaves is very well thought out

i love the motifs of the album and how he finds different ways to tie back to them (especially the flowers in her eyes)

i really enjoyed the album overall, and will definitely be taking the time soon to delve deeper into the album's lore. i;m glad i went in blind and without any preconcieved notions of the narrative, and look forward to learning more about the tale (or ideas/opinions of what it could be about!). im glad i gave the album a try, and would rate it overall 3.8/5 stars

[eggluttony]

Hi love ur stuff <3 what's ur fave fat fantasy w eggman

Thank you so much, I'm really happy you do 💜 Oh man hard to answer as I have thousands, I cycle through ones to fixate most. guess I'll share my current favorite fat/wg concept as the one I've been thinking about most lately

The thought of being with Eggman and always encouraging him to eat to his maximum capacity as often as possible. he always eats loads and such is obvious by the size of his belly, his intake is already huge. But prior to meeting him, it'd be much more occasional for him to really overeat even by his standards, to the point of being unable to eat another bite and having a tummy ache.

But now he's ending up laying back on the bed with a huge stuffed bulging full tummy nightly, panting for breaths and groaning as he cutely pleads for belly rubs, a deep blush in his cheeks for letting true greed take over again. He keeps accepting all food he's given between meals and his belly ends up two times bigger and more swollen going to sleep then when he wakes up.

Sometimes even when groaning about how much he overate in bed, I manage to feed him one last plate of cookies and milk, rubbing his poor gurgling overstuffed belly as we get the rest down there. he grumbles and I say "if you think it's too much, why are you still accepting and chewing hm?" and he gets so embarrassed for being so uncontrollably gluttonous that he steal keeps eating.

After that, he's huffing and breathlessly whimpering "If I keep eating like this, I'm going to get huge..." and with the way I look at him he's like "Ugh but you'd like that, wouldn't you, you bad influence..." and I just give him a sly smirk. I know I'm not the only one of the two of us. I just tell him it's time for his belly rubs and to get him to bed because he has another big day of eating to do tomorrow!

Fast forward to him being emperor of the world and he's absolutely enormous. like 600 lbs and counting, maybe more if we wanna go super extreme. He overate like that far too many times and once he'd succeeded in his goals and became ruler of everything, nobody could stop him and he went off the deep end and really let himself go and become the gluttonous blob he was meant to be.

Now that he no longer has to work to stop Sonic and take over the world, the only thing that was holding him back, he can just lounge around in luxury, be well pampered and just eat everything he wants, to his heart's content. All the food in the world belongs to him now and he absolutely engorges himself with huge feasts everyday and keeps growing and growing with no signs of stopping.

What looks like a huge swollen bulging tummy back when we first met looks so small compared to what he is now. A huge giant flabby doughy belly with tons of thick soft rolls, which spills out so wide and hangs low as much as it proceeds him. He has a pudgy round fattened face of multiple chins and pillowy arms and legs to match. He's so big and cozy, this is the bliss that an emperor should feel.

By now he's become very used to being overstuffed. If his stomach isn't bulging full to the limit, he doesn't consider himself full enough. A daily requirement met with huge feasts fit for the emperor he is. it's rare that he isn't seen eating, even when he does bring himself to come out and assess how things are in the empire and review new work and developments, he's eating all the while.

Though on some days he does manage to overdo it, even by his incredibly high standards now. And it takes a serious amount by now, considering how long it takes just to fill him up a normal amount daily now. But sometimes on an especially gluttonous, greedy, celebratory day, he may go even bigger with it. and he ends up lay back in his much bigger bed than back in the day

But he's still groaning about the immense overfullness, just like back then. It's cute thinking of how much smaller his belly was when he was complaining of an overstuffed stomach then. He's like five times bigger and more stuffed today. He doesn't often take conscious note of it but sometimes it does finally hit him and he says "Man, I got so fucking huge, what have I done to myself?"

Despite the way he words it, he clearly isn't very upset about it. Not with the way he moans and sighs with a big smile on his face and hidden under the piles of fat is his hard leaking cock when I rub his belly or grab the doughy rolls and shake them to jiggle his huge belly. He loves being a big pampered fattened up emperor, so cozy, spoiled, worshipped, and overfed well fed.

"See? We both love how huge you've gotten." I say, thinking back to what he said back then as he giggles while having his huge belly played with. He remembers and admits "Yeah, you're right, this is how it's meant to be." And I say "That's right, you were supposed to give in and become the greedy gluttonous fatty emperor you were born to be, it's the luxury you deserve~"

I always love feeding him in every way, giving him everything he wants. Helping him get as much as those huge feasts into his enormous belly as possible. It almost becomes my new main job as member of the empire and I'm certainly not complaining, I love helping to maintain or rather increase his perfect big fat emperor image. He can't fit on his throne anymore but he's still important!

I also like to try to push him to eat even more than he can handle even in this huge fattened state with his near limitless seeming capacity. But I find it and he's gasping and panting and groaning and how much of a fatty he's become really sets in with the big tummy ache deep under the rolls and layers of fat. He's whining "Ohh I'm so massive, how did I let myself get so huge?"

I love the sound of his moans when giving it rubs to soothe and comfort him and the way that even his massive soft jiggly belly feels firmer because he's so stuffed. He says "Do you think I went too far? Do you think I let myself get a little bit too fat? I mean you remember how I looked, an active strong egg shaped man. Now I'm just like... a massive pile of lard." He blushes so hard admitting it.

But looking at him with his cute fattened face of big round pudgy cheeks, fat heavy jiggly tits, a massive soft belly spilling out all around him, and his thick wobbly ass and knowing I helped too, I just think he's so cute and sexy. I say "No of course not, silly! You look so gorgeous and exactly how the big pampered emperor of the world should look! You're the best and most important so you need to eat and look like it too!"

"In fact, I think you need to look bigger to really help send the message." A robot rolls in a huge table of yet another huge feast, one for him to eat in bed like a real lazy spoiled fatty. I sent the secret order for a whole other meal as him saying that just made me want to feed him more. "Now stop worrying and eat up, you know you want to~" I say as I give him his next dish of many more that night.

At first he's alarmed and doesn't think he can handle another whole feast in this state! But it all smells so good and looks so tasty and if he doesn't eat up now, it will all be cold and they'll be too many leftovers and he can have his precious yummy food go to waste... So he opens his greedy mouth for more and allows himself to be fed even more despite moaning and feeling he might burst.

He allows himself to be stuffed with as much of a whole new huge feast as he can despite being so stuffed already, until he's so full it all weighs heavy in his firm swollen gut and he has to lay there and relax, waiting for digestion. He's the biggest fattest, and fullest he's felt in his life now, belching and moaning as I help him cum as a reward before he slips into a very content food coma 💕

And then of course everything else about what the life that living as a big fat emperor entails adds even more fun to the huge fat emperor fantasy, that I wrote about more in depth in this post. It keeps making me feel so weak thinking about it 💘

[evoblue]

@prideraiised's Gold asked: Bites.

Despite the early morning hour, Blue is already in the university's library, reviewing some of her seminar notes and triple-checking her presentation. She pauses only to take a sip of her oat milk chai latte and then resumes her furious typing on her laptop, taking the opportunity to make a few minor adjustments to her slides. While she sits pin-straight at her workstation, one of the sleeves of her off-shoulder cream knit sweater slides lower, exposing smooth skin. She's so focused on her work that she doesn't even realize anyone's behind her until—

BITE.

A startled cry spills out of her lips and she slaps a hand over her mouth to muffle it. Flustered and glowing red, she whirls around to face the offending party — a much too smug-looking Gold flashing her a cheeky little grin, pointed canines and all. Her pulse skyrockets immediately.

"What're you doing?? You can't just... BITE me out of the blue like that!" She casts a worried glance around her, then continues in a far more hushed tone. "How did you find me? Shouldn't you be sleeping still?"

Not only had she not told Gold where she would be, but she also hadn't expected to see him up this early, especially considering how jetlagged he should be. Meanwhile, the bite mark Gold left behind on her shoulder is still throbbing. Her lips press into a thin line as she tries not to think of the last time—

[thedreamingmoth]

So there's one thing that's annoying the hell out of me. I scroll through Tumblr and then see people posting their reviews on Avatar the way of water. All good and great but WHY ARE THEY FOCUSING ON SOMETHING THAT'S CLEARLY NOT THE MESSAGE IN THE MOVIE!!!

So what if portrayal of colonialism isn't good enough in Avatar! Nothing, this movie is meant to bring wonder, to show the beauty of the world both in the movie and the real world.

Many aspect of Pandora's biology is easy to observe in our daily life. I love how Eywa's root net is similar to mycelium. How they created the underwater paradise, all this marine life. Also Na'vi diversity, how Metkayina were colored and their bodies adapted to aquatic conditions.

We should be discussing how to save what we have now rather than crying over spilled milk!

Now, to stop all comments like:

"You're a racist, you discriminate people or everything else along these lines."

Colonialism was bad yes but nothing can be changed now. At some point we'll have to let it all go to start again. Holding on to hate and past wrongdoings is not healthy. Instead of pointing fingers at each other let's calm down and say:

"I don't like what was done to me and my people but now as it is in the past, we can work together so our children will have a better future."

Cameron put much work into this movie, to create a realistic yet alien environment takes a lot of knowledge, skill and time. So let's focus on what Cameron was focusing, on the beauty of the world. Because at the end of the day we all live in it, and it's worthy to fight for.