#space camp week
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idle-compy · 5 months ago
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little doodle dump of wips and ideas i keep forgetting to do smth with
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savrenim · 4 months ago
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cannot relate to people who get Annoyed or Embarrassed when your entire friend group starts saying a typo you made in the groupchat are you KIDDING the HONOR the POWER there in an IN-JOKE that is YOUR WORD YOU ARE ONLY HELD BACK BY YOUR SHAME
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pixelatedquarter · 1 year ago
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Sorry to Pete Wentz but today's scheduled Saturday saturday's celebrations have been cancelled, we're celebrating Spotlight saturday and Soul Punk sunday tomorrow. I'm sure he's fine with it.
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hoodieimp · 5 months ago
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GUESS WHO'S GOT A NEW PHONE FOLKS
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kerosene-saint · 5 months ago
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so many things happening in my life in the next couple months and it feels like my life is turning around compared to how I felt this time last year which was complete and utter dread and burn out in every sense of the word
#ME WHEN I GIVE MYSELF MORE SPACE AND TIME TO HEAL AND BE OKAY AFTER A SCHOOL YEAR#there are several factors as to why i don't feel like the human-ish equivalent of the swamp monster#mostly though it's because I'm going into homeschooling so the overwhelming fear of the next school year and all the expectations and#running around and will i get a good teacher and do i have to change my schedule and oh god am i gonna be able to get my 504 in check and#are my teachers even going to follow it and all of that isn't present#I'm gonna meet my teacher here soon and i she's a special ed teacher and i won't have to run between classes#or worry about my principal suddenly making a rule that we can't go to the bathrooms during class hours#and everything else that comes with going to school i did#and also the reason i don't feel like shit is i haven't done much this summer!!! literally everything was fighting for my time and attention#last summer and i felt like i barely had a moment to breathe#one moment I'm in Tennessee with my aunt and the next I'm back in Oklahoma running a convention#and then less than a week later I'm at counselor in training camp for two weeks (would've been three but i got sick due to overworking#myself while at the camp)#and then as soon as all of that was done i had only about a week before school started again#this year i only went to one convention instead of working at one and I'm going to two camps#one was at the start which was a day camp that i work at#and the second one is like next weekend (not this one but the next) and it's an overnight but again only a weekend instead of two weeks#and I'm a camper at that second camp since it's meant for lgbtq+ teens :3#and that's it!!!!#then i have school and in October i have the dan and phil terrible influence tour in Colorado#which means i get to visit my aunt and uncle and my cousin#and i have my nurse gerard costume for halloween#and then at the end of January i have my first furry convention which I'm making a fursuit for currently!!!!!
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nerdie-faerie · 6 months ago
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Sitting on a balcony rocking chair looking at the trees and lake after an anxiety attack, might be the only way I get through this summer tbh
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cappurrccino · 11 months ago
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would I enjoy a drill sergeant barking me out of bed at 5am to go run a mile and whatnot? absolutely not
do I think that would actually get me into shape? if it didn't kill me first, yeah, absolutely
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beta-adjacent · 2 years ago
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You know shit’s going down when all you want to do is nest.
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forkpigeon3146 · 7 months ago
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chat i have seventeen thousand photos in my gallery and they only take up HALF of what spotify does
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tt-squid · 8 months ago
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its really really mean for them to make us have a 9 am class the day after an assignment is due at midnight like this is gonna suck lol
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writersdrug · 3 months ago
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I fully believe that Simon "Ghost" Riley wouldn't want an expensive, lavish honeymoon after your wedding. Of course, if that's what you dream of, he'll do it for you. He'd do anything for the person who loved him enough to marry him, scars and all. You want a beach-front, warm getaway in Costa Rica, filled with sunsets and quiet time by the waves? Say no more, he's looking for first class tickets already. You like the sound of a ski resort, surrounded by snowy alpines and hot chocolates, holding hands on the ski lifts and racing down the hills (you'd beat him every time, he's not one for winter sports)? He's asking if you'd prefer Smuggler's Notch in Vermont, or Vail Ski in Colorado. He'll do it if it's with you. He'll do anything for you.
But ask Simon what he wants, and he'll give you such a domestic answer: two or three weeks, somewhere in the United Kingdom, in a cottage backed up against the woods - preferably in autumn, when the leaves will be orange, the air will be misty, and the soft rain will be just enough to drown out his anxieties. Sure, he'd love to go hiking with you in Lake District, finding a good spot under the cover of the dense trees, listening to the sound of the babbling river and showing off his camping skills - harmlessly bickering with you about how it's not considered camping if you're in a cabin with electricity and running water. He rents an SUV and folds the seats down, throwing a mattress, blankets, and pillows in the back so the both of you can cuddle together while watching the stars.
But really, he just wants to exist with you for a while - as a married couple. He wants to wake up next to you without having anywhere to be at the ass crack of dawn, taking his time to watch the way you breathe so softly, the way you're always holding onto some part of him while you sleep, whether that's your arm wrapped around his bicep, your hand fisting his shirt, or your being wrapped tightly around his soul. He wants to cook meals with you, watch as you sway to whatever music you put on the telly, butt-bumping him as you chop vegetables and he stirs the pot on the stove. He wants to be next to you as you drag him around the rainy streets of Manchester, stepping into every bookstore or plant nursery you pass, eventually landing in a coffee shop and sitting close to each other, talking over a vanilla latte and a black coffee about how wainscoting is a gorgeous addition to homes, and how it's a crime that people tend to tear it down in modern decor. He promises to install some himself just for you, wherever you want it.
He wants to spend quiet nights at home, curled under the blanket on the couch, some random movie playing on the telly and the space heater blowing warm air on the both of you - he's too mesmerized at the way you're twirling the golden wedding band around your ring finger, biting back a smile every time you glance down at it (he has a wedding band too - but he'd never take it on missions. Instead, he has a simple line tattooed around his ring finger for when he has to leave the ring behind). He wants to make love to you, leaving soft kisses and nips along your skin, rolling his hips into you slowly and sensually, losing himself in the quiet moans, whispered I love you's, and the feeling of your nails carving the memory into the skin of his back. He wants to rest with himself inside of you, cradling you to his chest as he mumbles sleepily, "I love you, want to marry you every day of my life..." his rough hand tracing your skin, committing every bump, every curve, every vein to his memory. He wants to fall asleep there, letting go of his anxieties, any thoughts of doubt rolling off of his shoulders when he presses kisses to the back of your neck, his fingers slowly fiddling with the ring on your finger.
You're his quiet. His peace. You're soft sweaters, the sugar cube he drops into a warm mug of tea in his hands, the raindrops gently landing on his face, the smell of earth and pine at the edge of the woods, the sound of wood crackling in a warm fire. You're gentle, even when you're excited and bouncy, smothering him in kisses or forcing him to dance with you on the back patio. He knows you'll both have to leave this solace soon, returning to work like the wedding had never happened, forced to be cogs in the machine of society. But to Simon, each day after this will be a day he's married to you - each day will be a blessing, a reason to thank the universe, a reason to smile as he crosses the threshold of your shared home, a reason to crack his dad jokes outside of missions, a reason to join you on your weekly grocery runs, a reason to buy flowers once a week to replace the previous ones.
You're his peace.
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syb-rooks · 11 months ago
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The bad kids are an incredibly healthy and supportive friend group BUT OH MY GOD THEY SUCK AT COMMUNICATING!
Half of their problems would be solved if they talked to each other.
Fabian would GLADLY pay for Adaine's components and for Riz's tuition if they asked. He would even get his papa to change his trust fund conditions to include them. Or he would declare Riz and Adaine his nemesis.
They would figure out the reason for Fig's misfortune in a week max. They would march into hell, probably accompanied by both Gorthalax and Sandra Lynn, and demand to break whatever deal she made with whichever demon involved.
If Fabian even suggested he was lonely, the bad kids would organise sleepovers every night. He would circle between the Thistlesprings, the Gukgaks and the Mordred Manor. Lydia would pack him his own lunch.
Fig would immediately start promoting Cassandra's religion on all social media, and get her to thousand followers in a week. The rest of the bad kids would join without hesitation.
If Riz would finally admit the HUGE stress he is under, everyone, even Fig, would stop piling all the work on him and happily write their 10 page essays. They would convince him to see Jawbone, and enjoy his last years in high school. They would band together to find the rogue teacher within a day. They would make sure that Riz's resume is the most impressive CV that the universities have ever received.
They would all gather together to come up with music for Fig and Gorgug's new album. Fabian would choreograph their music videos, Adaine would come up with rhymes, Riz would bring a list of all their adventures, including motifs and connections made, to give her inspiration, Kristen would suggest to make parodies of classic camp songs from her old church.
Adaine would contact Aelwyn immediately to get dirt on Porter, to blackmail him. Gorgug would get permission for his MCAT exams by the end of the week.
And if she would stay on the phone a little longer and admitted how much she is struggling, Aelwyn would immediately return home along with her cats. Then she would drag her sister to Jawbone's door, and force her to give him the components list.
The problem is that even after all those years, after all those adventures, even after the forest of the nightmare king, they still each think of themselves as the weak link. As the person in the group that isn't allowed, doesnt deserve to take space, ask for help. Because they should be able to handle it on their own. Isn't that what adulthood is like?
They would abandon anything and everything to help someone else, as long as that person isn't themselves. As long as they dont have to show their amazing, incredible, powerful, and oh so compassionate friends how weak and imperfect they are in comparison.
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Sometimes...
self-care
is sitting alone, in silence
zoning out & disassociating
#fun times teaching children's art summer camp#i was teaching a ceramics sampler camp#with wheel throwing & hand building#our studio has eight electric pottery wheels#it's also divided into two rooms#one with the wheels & slab roller & clay sink & all the tools for hand building#one room has more table space & the glazes#i had FIFTEEN rising third to fifth graders in my morning camp#and FOURTEEN rising sixth to ninth graders in my afternoon camp#& kids start getting sent down to camp about 15 minutes before they start#& during the “hour” for lunch/recess- it's actually 45 minutes & you have to clean up from the morning & get ready for the afternoon#and go to the bathroom & perhaps talk to an adult & eat#it was a really great week last week#but my kids had fun & they made cute stuff & I had a rockstar intern helping me out#it was such a small room for 17 people#it's a “specialty camp” with a materials fee so it should have a cap of 12 kids- NOT 15#but also...there shouldn't be more students than wheels if you include wheel throwing in the description#i didn't even get paid extra for having too many kids#BUT- i will get paid for staying late to load/unload the kiln#& the program director will make sure they don't do me dirty like this next year#they can't afford to lose me lol#i'm the only instructor who teaches wheel throwing & works with kids#all i wanted to do on my lunch breaks was to sit at the table I claimed for myself- all alone- in silence- zoning out#doctorwormandtheelectricmayhem
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pellucid-constellations · 1 month ago
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Fable - During
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Pairing: Azriel x Reader
Summary: Azriel was too late, and something was brewing. The fate of your wings rested in the balance and there was nothing left of him to reconcile with.
Word count: 2.2k
Warnings: Angst, injury, violence
a/n: This is part of a mini-series but each part can be read on its own/out of order. The next part is going to be long guys <3 Thank you for reading all of this angst!!!
Series Masterlist (all parts ♡)
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The ground beneath Azriel’s feet must have disappeared. 
He was unstable, falling, plummeting into an unknown abyss. 
When he looked down, Azriel saw the plush carpet at his feet, but as he replayed Rhysand’s words—four words, echoing—the blur behind his eyes made the physical obsolete. We can’t find her, Rhysand had said, followed by a multitude of questions from Cassian that Azriel could not hear. Everything was buzzing and the carpet was gone. 
Where was Lucien? Azriel remembered that Lucien was to go with you. Where was he? 
He had to be dead because if he were alive and you were missing, Azriel would kill him himself. 
“Lucien,” Azriel spoke, his voice rough, interrupting the conversation he had not been part of. 
“What?” Rhysand asked. 
But Cassian ignored his High Lord’s confusion. “She was never bringing Lucien,” he growled, throwing his brother a sneer. “She only said that to make sure you went on your date. I told her I should’ve come. I told her—” 
Azriel had lost his breath. He was grappling for it, trying to make sense of Cassian’s words as his lungs began to burn, but you wouldn’t do that, would you? Why would you lie to him? Over something like this? 
“Cassian, enough,” Azriel gasped, the buzzing of his brother’s voice a constant barrier in the losing battle within his head. “Who’s looking for her? Where should we go?” 
Azriel was dressed in a ridiculous button-up shirt with slacks that now felt too tight on his legs. His sleeves were rolled up to his forearms and his shadows took advantage of the open space, trailing up to protect him from nothing. Because nothing was here—he wasn’t in danger. 
You were. 
Azriel had only gotten through drinks with Elain before the call from his High Lord sent him into the sky. He couldn’t remember if he apologized. Azriel’s shoes were pinching his feet. 
“I had just lost connection with her when I called you. I sent her to the northeast camp. There’s a possibility that—” 
Azriel was traveling through the shadows, darkness consuming him before Rhysand could finish his sentence. He should have grabbed Cassian for backup, but that was a thought Azriel would only have much, much later. 
His mind was on you—only on you. 
That wasn’t unnatural for Azriel; you were one of the most important people in his life and you had been in trouble before. Life-threatening, war-induced trouble, but somehow, this felt different. 
You had been distant lately. 
Azriel had noticed, but Azriel had also been so zeroed in on getting Elain’s attention that he figured he would have time to check on you in a few weeks. 
When he landed in the camp, the foreboding quiet made him consider that he might never get to check on you again. Illyrian camps were never quiet. There was always shouting or fighting or nagging mothers getting after their young. But the insects in the bushes could be heard in this camp, and Azriel paused amid his racing heart to make sense of the noise. 
And then he heard the scream. 
Your scream.
And he was running. 
His shoes groaned as they pounded into soft dirt and you screamed again. Azriel had never heard that sound come from you. The way it erupted into the air—it was as if it was ripped from your throat, evoked from nothing but agony. 
He pushed himself harder, faster, until the screams became closer and a small hut materialized on the horizon. The image of the quaint house brought Azriel relief, but that relief was short-lived because your screams had become tired in his journey. With each step, your voice broke more and more and Azriel didn’t even feel angry. 
The rage he expected to feel was consumed by the terror that gripped him. 
He ripped open the door and that terror only increased tenfold. 
Azriel was usually focused during battle, his mind razor-sharp. He was known for calculating every step, for remembering each life he took, and being able to recount each slice of his blade when asked for a report days later. Azriel was a warrior and a spy. 
But Azriel could not remember his actions. 
From the moment he opened the door and found you on the ground, surrounded by enemies and so broken, he lost the ability to calculate anything other than death. 
He figured a few must have gotten away because he vaguely registered that the door made a sound. But over the screams, that sound was inconsequential, and with the image of you before him, lying in your blood, chest only minutely rising and falling, everything else was inconsequential. 
He only remembered that the rage finally found him. 
Only when bodies littered the floor did the anger make way for the visceral fear that came with reaching for you—grabbing you as you let out small, weak sounds and took labored breaths. 
“Y/n?” Azriel stressed, eyes roving over your figure with haste that his hands couldn't match. He had to be careful; so much of you was broken. “Y/n,” he spoke again, as if the echo of your name would somehow fix you, snap you out of the hurt. 
Azriel’s breath quivered. His scarred hands hovered over your skin now, afraid to touch you more than to bring you into his arms. His fingers shook. Your wings—it was your wings. 
“You’re okay,” Azriel affirmed, whispering only to himself. “You’re okay. You’re okay.” 
Salt tainted the surface of his tongue, and Azriel then recognized that he was crying. Fat, heavy tears blurred his vision and fell into his mouth as he repeated his mantra into the stagnant air. 
Your wings looked beyond repair. When Hybern destroyed Cassian’s, the roots remained. The delicate flesh was burned and torn, but regrowth was still feasible.
Only small pieces of the membrane along your back remained. 
Azriel’s soul wept. 
You groaned, and Azriel stopped his inspection of your back, his hands brushing your hair off from where it stuck to your skin. 
“Y/n?” he tried again. “Can you hear me? I’m—I’m going to bring you home, okay? You’re going to be fine, I promise.” 
He shouldn’t have promised that. His voice broke as he spoke the words and Azriel knew he shouldn’t have promised that because you only let out a broken rendition of ‘my wings?’ that Azriel had no response to. He only squeezed his eyes shut and pressed his forehead to your temple before shadows consumed him once more. They had been rampaging around the pair, whispering worried, angry words in Azriel’s ear, but they remained faithful. 
They brought you home. 
Mor screamed first. 
He assumed everyone would be out looking for you, but Azriel hadn’t broken the connection to Rhysand’s mind, and they had been expecting him. His family stood before him as your blood stained the rug of his High Lord’s favorite sitting room. Rhysand was missing, gone to retrieve Madja, but Azriel was only looking for those he knew could help you. 
His throat caught on air as he frantically searched for Feyre in the room. When he saw her wide eyes, he let out a desperate, “Help her,” that sounded nothing like him. His High Lady’s shoulders rose and fell with hurried panic as she came forward and then hesitated. 
Azriel heard someone vomit in the corner of the room—Cassian, he thought—and Mor came to kneel beside him. 
“Feyre,” he sobbed. “Please. Please, try.” 
Mor was crying. Cassian had wiped his mouth and come to stand beside Feyre, but everyone was too afraid to touch you. You rested in Azriel’s arms, but even his palms remained face up and did not connect with your skin. He would break you more, he was sure of it. Your wings bent at odd angles and hung from your body by only tethered threads and no one knew what to do. 
Azriel thought that dying would be better than this. 
His button-up was stained red. 
“Fuck.” Rhysand’s voice rattled the air in the House. At some point, Feyre had broken her hesitancy and kneeled before you, a gentle glow emitting from her hands as she tried to stitch together the broken remains of your skin. When her mate appeared with the elder healer, she turned wild eyes towards him. Rhysand stood frozen, mimicking each person in the room, but he was the High Lord—a composed leader—so his reverie lasted only seconds before he was sent into action. 
“The table,” Rhysand demanded. “Lay her on the table.” 
No one moved. 
Azriel couldn’t stop looking at you. 
Madja then spoke, no, demanded, “Now.” 
The table was cleared, everything swiped to the floor with abandon. As gently as he could, Azriel rose from the floor on shaking legs and heaved you up with him, offering soft apologies as you cried out. He wished you would pass out from the pain, be free of it all, but the agonizing reality that you might not wake up struck him harder. 
“I’m so sorry, y/n,” he whispered against your hair. His body ached. Azriel leaned you against the table as the other members of his family turned you on your stomach. He kneeled to meet your lidded gaze, your face pressed against the wood. “Madja’s going to fix it, okay?” 
The healer was giving orders—Cassian to get water, Mor to support your head, Feyre for support. It was all a buzz in Azriel’s ears. He licked his lips and tried to meet your eyes, but they were trailing off, unfocused. 
“Y/n?” he tried. “Angel?” A name he had dropped once Elain came into the picture. Your lashes fluttered. His attention peaked. “It’s okay, angel. I’m so, so sorry. I’m sorry—” 
Azriel was torn from his position on the ground, a heavy hand shoving him up and against the wall. His shadows remained caressing your skin, but a fist met Azriel's face and he lost sight of you. 
“This is your fault.” 
“Cassian!” Mor called, desperately pleading with no one. 
“It is,” Cassian seethed, his arm pressed to the Shadowsinger’s throat. “If he hadn’t been searching for something with a woman not even meant to be his, he would have been there. She would have said anything to ensure your happiness. Anything, Azriel.” 
Azriel blinked and Cassian’s face was inches from his own. “I didn’t—” 
“You have been blinded, brother. You’ve been blind for years and now this is the price.” 
“I don’t—what are you saying?” Azriel pleaded, trying and failing to look over Cassian’s broad wings to catch a glimpse of you. 
“Cassian, this is not the time,” Mor scolded, but the anguish burned so deeply in Cassian’s eyes that Azriel could tell he wasn’t hearing her. 
“She gave you everything,” his brother continued. “She—” 
Your scream punctuated the building tension in the room. Cassian whipped around and Azriel used the opportunity to shove him away, the Shadowsinger racing to your side once again. But, once again, he was pushed away. Rhysand held his shoulder back this time, shaking his head with a furrowed brow. 
The screams echoed in the room and they hurt. 
They hurt everyone. 
Feyre and Mor stood beside Madja, the three of them set to the fruitless task of saving your wings. A small part of Azriel spoke the truth that they were also just trying to save you. You had lost so much blood and he still knew nothing of your other injuries. 
“Rhys,” Azriel begged, beseeching him with his gaze. 
But Rhysand only shook his head once more. “They need the space.” 
“She needs me.” 
Cassian scoffed and ground his jaw, but a glance in the general’s direction found only tears and the quivering of his lips as he pressed them together. 
“You need to let them work.” 
“This is my fault,” Azriel spoke, his tone dead, lost within the echo of your screams. “I was seeing Elain,” he admitted. He met Rhysand’s eyes. “You told me not to. She lied so I could go.” 
Rhysand didn’t even look disappointed. He didn’t look surprised. He only ticked his jaw to the side and breathed deeply through his nose as your screams filled the room once more. 
Azriel flinched. The soles of his shoes were caked with blood and cracked along the stitches. 
Rhysand would have the right to be angry. He had the right to send Azriel away and force him to sit in uncertainty and the consequences of the night, but Rhysand found something familiar in the Shadowsinger’s eyes—something different. Something that Rhysand could find in himself if he were to search his mind from the night he thought Feyre to be dead. 
Impossible, the High Lord assumed, but you were still screaming and there was no time to inspect the intricacies of Azriel’s reaction. 
So Rhysand only held back the maelstrom of his own emotions, his sister broken on the table just feet from him, and kept his response to that of a leader. 
“Let them work, Azriel.”
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northgazaupdates · 5 months ago
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URGENT!! EMERGENCY SUPPORT NEEDED!!
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This is Lina Zeyad, an attorney from north Gaza. She and her family have been displaced from their home by occupation bombing, and were forced to flee various shelters under threat of lOF assault numerous times before finding space in Nuseirat refugee camp. Sadly, she was displaced AGAIN about a week ago. Every displacement costs money for transport, accommodations, and basic necessities. Lina’s family is running out of money. If they are forced to flee again, they will have no way to travel and nowhere to go!
In addition to the danger, exhaustion, and expense of repeated displacement, Lina has another problem: **her youngest son has contracted Hepatitis C after having to drink contaminated water**. His illness is worsened by malnutrition, and he is very sick. He needs clean water, nutritious food, medical care, and stable shelter in order to recover, all of which are extremely expensive and difficult to find in Gaza right now.
Please support Lina so she has a chance to find accommodations, food, and medicine for her family! Reblog this post and repost the link (https://gofund.me/de10f8c6) below to share her campaign. Donations have all but stopped, and Lina is extremely desperate! Please help her family survive!
Vetted by nabulsi
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elysianightsss · 11 days ago
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No because girl you NEEDDDDDD to elaborate on this -> Soulmate AU. Poly!141 x neurodivergent!reader <- I will die happily
Elaboratingggggggg🤭🫠
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You didn’t think that you’d get this far in life, many reasons spring to mind but the main one is you’re a little different than most people. You can’t cope with certain things and struggle with change. You remember growing up your family would brush off your ‘issues’ and say to just deal with it. How little they understood you.
Moving out was the best decision you ever made, the only change you have ever been happy about. It was necessary and would make your life so much easier on a level only you could understand. You could set up your space the way you like it, the way you need it. And with just you, no one would mess with your stuff just to see you loose it as it was ‘funny’ or move things to suit them better.
This way, you could live in peace.
Task force 141 had just finished a successful mission, camping out in one of the many secret safe houses as they waited for further instructions when they had sent Johnny to the shop for supplies. That’s where he saw you, in a Sainsbury’s supermarket of all places, headphones tight over your ears to block out the world while you tried to decide if the extra two, ninety-nine was worth it or not for the soothing lavender face mask you wanted.
Johnny was quick to subtly snap a picture of you and even go as far as to follow you home before bolting it back to the guys to tell them he’d finally found you. Their last soulmate.
As soon as Johnny showed them the image of you, that was it for them. They had to have you. A burning need coursing through their veins, pumping around their bodies. Nothing would ever be enough until they had you in their arms.
But as said and as they observed themselves, you don’t cope with change.
So they had to situate themselves into your life slowly, one by one.
Johnny and Simon moved in next door to you, and lived there for seven months slowly getting to know you and obviously spying on you. They gradually began to understand you and your cute quirks. They know that you eat the same thing for dinner every night, you use the same plate or bowl and wash it straight after use to make sure it is ready for next time.
You have one set of cutlery, one glass and one mug. Two pillows though you only sleep on one and use the other to hug to sleep. And to top it all off you have one recliner chair and one massive beanbag chair that makes you feel like you’re being hugged tight each time you sit on it. It gives you the deep pressure therapy you desperately need at times.
The guys found your habits strange at first but the more time they spent with you, the more they began to understand you. Understand your need for order, for repetition. And they had experienced first hand what happens when change was forced into your safe space.
Johnny had the bright idea to gift you a set of cutlery a few weeks ago so when he and Simon came round for dinner as they did every Thursday for the past four months, they didn’t have to bring cutlery and plates from their own place, it would already be there.
Simon said it was a bad idea but he couldn’t say no to Johnny, not with how happy he looked while he picked out some pretty baby blue plates and silver cutlery with little mushrooms painted at the end. He boasted to Simon about how much you’d love them while they stood in the queue to pay.
He was wrong.
After dinner was cooked you plated up the food no problem thinking the pretty plates were from their house. Then you opened the kitchen drawer only to hear the clutter and smash of cutlery rubbing together. The sound made a ringing pierce your ears, your hands reaching up to cover them. It was like nails on a chalkboard to you. The sound you heard making you panic beyond measure, your breathing out of control as you slid to your knees.
Johnny’s smile dropped and he sprung into action using the deep pressure therapy you had told him about with your beanbag chair. Simon was quick to removed the extra plates and cutlery from where Johnny had put them and take them back to their place before returning ready to help. He knew he’d need to call John and let him know you had had an episode, but helping you came first.
So you liked constant repetition. If it made you happy, that was absolutely fine with them.
Kyle got himself hired as a barista at your favourite cafe, he learned your usual and practiced at home to make sure every morning when you stopped by on the way to work to drink your coffee and sit with your laptop for twenty minutes, you’d have the perfect drink. He made absolutely sure that it tasted the same every single time. No change.
After a couple of months of smiles and waves here and there he finally got you to open up. Baby steps. A little at a time and now Kyle was taking his twenty minute break at your table while you typed up something for work. You always worked so hard. But he managed to get a few sentences out of you each time and it made his heart sing.
And last but not least, John became your new boss after your last one mysteriously got caught for money laundering. Mr Price was an amazing boss, he didn’t ask for much and was always giving you big opportunities that you’d only ever dreamed of. You had been promoted twice since he became the CEO.
You were now executive editor under him as the chief editor at one of the best publishers in the country. Pirons Classics, number two in the UK and number four in the World. To say the guys were proud that you worked there in the first place was an understatement. Their smart girl.
He called you sweet nicknames and brought you lunch everyday. The same thing, a pesto and cheese sandwich and a snack of your choosing from the vending machines. You don’t remember when it started but you were always too shy to say anything so it became a regular thing.
If you were to sit and think real hard about the situation you would realise how changes had been introduced into your life ever since the four of them appeared. But they were subtle changes and you genuinely couldn’t remember a time when these changes weren’t normal. On top of that, these four men were the only people besides yourself, that you felt comfortable, relaxed and content around.
So for the first time you don’t sit and think, for the first time you just let it happen and you don’t notice the difference.
Johnny and Simon were more involved with you than the other two. They were the closest to you currently with the status of your best friends which Johnny most certainly bragged to the other two about. You had known them for almost a year now and they didn’t exactly hide their romantic relationship but didn’t exactly flaunt it either.
You had found it kinda hot when you saw them kiss and even though it was unusual for you, you luckily managed to keep your mouth shut about it.
You had no idea they had noticed.
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