#sorry it would be so funny
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
BREAKING NEWS: sukuna and yuuji parent trap!au
#sorry it would be so funny#yuuji goes to live with mom (kenjaku) and kenny is like son you've barely touched your (malevolent evil energy) are you alright :/#sukuna goes to live with dad/grandpa and unlocks his inner old person while also raising hell#picturing sukuna in a wife beater slouching on the couch with grandpa watching a sengoku era period drama that's def not for kids#Jin comes home from his little salary man job and is like ummmmMMMMM ???#jjk hcs
80 notes
·
View notes
Text
spock’s room decor is actually fucking bonkers. The weapons??? the big red velvet curtain??? like ok phantom of the opera go crazy.
for reference jim’s room has some photos and a plant so we can surmise this is uniquely a spock being a dramatic weirdo thing
#spock baby im sorry but it looks like the backdrop of one of those alpha male podcasts#nurse chapel is stronger then me because if i saw this frat boy ass decor i would have immediately gotten the ick and left#the lack of coherent design is so funny#ALSO CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW TO CURTAIN IS COVERING THE SHELVES WHICH IS SUCH A SMALL THING BUT IT MAKES ME SO MAD WHY SPOCK WHY#i hope bones never saw this room because he would have a fucking field day#star trek#star trek tos#spirk#jim kirk#spock#tos
45K notes
·
View notes
Text
he’s begging kuni to let them eat pancakes for dinner
#i’m sorry to everyone who followed me for skk they haven’t crossed my mind in weeks#it’s just been knkdz and kunikida brainrot 😔#when your brat of a boyfriend asks for a kiss and u tell him no and he hits you w this face#i would slap him tbh#honestly i think it’s a good thing kuni is dead bc he’s finally been released from the eternal punishment of being dazai’s babysitter#i miss them so badly it’s not even funny anymore#bungo stray dogs#bungou stray dogs#bsd#dazai osamu#osamu dazai#kunikida doppo#doppo kunikida#kunikidazai#knkdz#kunizai#lotus draws#also i deadass forgot how to shade so ignore how i basically just pillow shaded this entire drawing
4K notes
·
View notes
Text
This could be a kart if FLAF wasn't fucking around..
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf fanart#fnaf vanny#fnaf vanessa#michael afton#ennard#flaf#five laps at freddy's#sister location#security breach#I DIDNT mean to take this long to draw some FLAF content#lots of ideas are currently competing to be drawn next BAHAH#CAN I just say quickly too I tried to FLAF demo and I really like it!#can’t wait to play it once it’s finished and all issues are smoothed over 💜#ANYWAY Vanny and Michael are surprised Michael got in the game…#though it isn’t a flattering depiction#COULD YOU imagine if Michael could be Ennard’s kart#IT WOULD BE SO funny#I know it’s a logistical nightmare for theorists but I wish so bad for it to be real 💀#I HAD WAY TOO MUCH FUN drawing the Michael mobile here#IM SO SORRY to Michael Afton once again
6K notes
·
View notes
Text
@staff if you [change] the [design] of the fucking [dashboard] i will kill you
edit. i want it on the actual post that i am not actually making a de-th threat against the staff. that's shitty. the caption quotes the fucking costco hot dog meme, which i originally said in the tags. if any staff member sees this please do Not take it personally
#dashboard#staff#tumblr update#comic#art#doodles#costco ceo about the price of a hot dog.png#i refuse to believe this is a real problem that site owners think people have#frankly i refuse to believe people had this issue with deviantart before eclipse#i am sorry you have to put about 15 minutes of effort into understanding a new website. feel better soon#my main blog doesn't have it yet but i logged into here to make this post and. i have it#this is fucking terrible. it would ahve been really really funny for april fools day but not as a permanent change#i hate it a Lot. i hate it so fucking much. oh . my god.#edit - guys i amnot actually sending de*th threats to staff it's the costco hot dog meme
28K notes
·
View notes
Text
kabru and mithrun's fun succubus adventure
#dunmeshi#really cool art i thought up#kabru of utaya#mithrun#dunmeshi spoilers#<- idk. anime watchers dont know who mithrun is or what he does so i think it needs a spoiler warning#labru#<- I GUESS..................#I'M SORRY For adding that stupid fucking figure i think it's really funny and i never want to see it again in my life#i don't think his succubus would show up as that thing i think hes more Complex than that it would just be funny#also mithrun's succubus might actually shapeshift who knows?? Thats not what this comic is about though. just My Funny Joke.
4K notes
·
View notes
Text
Live Mel reaction
#no one in this damn city can last two seconds without her smh#I can’t believe this is my first ever arcane fanart lmao#look the finale airs tomorrow and this joke won’t make sense anymore after that point so it’s gotta be done now#I don’t have TIME a to study the the art style and create a meaningful homage to one of the greatest animiated series ever made#this is what you get instead#it’s funny cause her canon response will be ‘’:( I’m sorry jayce. he was a good friend and a great man’’ at BEST#cause even tho she canonically likes him they’ve had like no direct interactions so nothing more would make sense#but an enby can dream#arcane#arcane spoilers#arcane season 2#arcane season 2 spoilers#mel medarda#jayce talis#viktor arcane#art#my art#digital art#fanart#doodle#drawing#sketch#shitpost#meljay#jayvik#meljayvik
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
Family Dinners - dpxdc
"Holy shit, you're Bruce Wayne!" Danny gaped, jabbing a finger at the man sitting at the head of the table.
The bustling dining room goes silent as everyone turns to look at him.
"Danny, who did you think was going to be here?" Tim asks, disbelief plain in his voice and Danny feels his face flush red.
"Sorry, I, uh, I guess I just never put it together. Tim Drake-Wayne. Wayne Manor. It, uh, makes sense now." He laughs sheepishly and scrubs at his neck before slumping back down into his chair.
"Well," Tim says with an indulgent sigh, "at least I know you're not just friends with me for my connections."
"Yeah, I'm really sorry, I just never thought about it, I guess."
Danny sinks lower as everyone around him laughs. Come to dinner, he said, the food is the best, he said, ignore the family, he said. Danny really wishes he'd listened to Tim and just ignored them—almost as much as he's regretting accepting the offer in the first place—but... he's having dinner with Batman.
Ancients, that's so weird!
The last time he saw Batman was in the future and, suffice it to say, it was not going well. There hadn't really been time for family dinners there.
Wait. Family dinners?
He peers around the table, openly gawking at everyone as it all clicks into place.
"Everything alright, Danny? Now realising who everyone else is?" Tim asks with a roll of his eyes.
"Uh... something like that..." Danny mumbles as everyone laughs again.
From further down the table, the smallest Wayne scoffs and clicks his tongue.
"I thought you said he was smart, Drake?"
"So, you all do it, too, then?" he asks, ignoring the jibe. Danny's only a little bit jealous as he thinks of how much easier they must have it, how much easier it'd be if his family had been on his side, too. "You all work together?"
"Nah," Dick says from across the table with a brilliant grin. "Tim's the only one that works with Bruce, we all have different jobs. I'm a police officer in Bludhaven."
"Disgusting." Danny blurts out without thinking—because seriously, what kind of self-respecting vigilante would also be a police officer?—before clapping a hand over his mouth. "Sorry."
The whole table laughs again, the loudest being the blonde girl a few spaces down from Dick. Look, Danny wasn't really paying attention to names when they were all paraded in front of him. Dick only gets remembered because his name is a joke.
Come on, Danny, recover!
"That's, uh, not what I meant, though."
"Oh?" Dick asks, cocking his head slightly to the side. Is it Danny's imagination or does his smile tense slightly?
"Yeah, I mean like, you know, in costume. It must make it so much easier to have everyone together like this."
"Costume? What do you mean?"
Yeah, Danny's not imagining it, everyone tenses up at that. It's really only now that he's realising that this probably isn't how he should bring up that he knows about their... night time activities. In fact, he probably shouldn't be bringing it up at all.
"Uuhhh..." Danny looks wildly around the table as he continues making his stupid noise. Think, think, think! There must be a way out of this!
"Danny?" Tim asks, looking concerned.
"Oh, Ancients, this isn't how I wanted it to go at all," he mutters, slipping even further into his chair. He's almost on the floor now and he so, so wishes it could just swallow him up.
His real first meeting with Batman was meant to be cool! He had planned to be Phantom, maybe save them from a tight spot, prove his worth as a mysterious and powerful ally as thanks for the help Batman gave him in the future.
"Danny, what are you talking about?" Tim starts tugging on his sleeve in an attempt to pull him back up from his pit of despair.
Eventually, Danny relents and sits up straighter, hiding his face in his hands and whining all the while.
"I'm sorry, I just didn't expect him to be here and it threw me off so now I look stupid and it's so embarrassing!" he wails, flailing his arms wide. "Why wouldn't you warn me that Batman was your adopted dad, Tim? Couldn't you have let me know?"
"I'm sorry, what? Danny are you alright? There's no way Bruce can be Batman, look at him!"
"Yeah," the blonde girl laughs from the bottom of the table, "look at him! That's a wet noodle of a man! Batman can actually do things, B is incapable of pretty much everything."
"Thank you, Stephanie," Bruce sighs, massaging his forehead.
It's... Those are the first words Danny's heard Batman say since everything went down and it's enough to knock him out of his embarrassment.
It's really good to hear his voice again. Especially now, when it's strong and healthy and full of personality—even if that personality is little more than a tired father right now—far better than how it had been, at the end.
Danny sits up, back straight, and grins. He's got this. He remembers it perfectly. Some people count sheep to fall asleep, Danny repeats his mantra to be certain that he'll never forget it.
"Gamma alpha upsilon tau iota mu epsilon, 42, 63, 28, 1 colon 65 dash 9."
Once again, the whole table falls into silence.
"Holy shit..." breathes the other D name (Duke? Danny's pretty sure he's Signal) from opposite Stephanie. "Isn't that...?"
"The time travelling code." The littlest Wayne says stiffly. "We have met in the future?"
"That's not just the time travelling code, Dami." Dick says, looking between Danny and Bruce. "That's the family time travelling code."
Danny's grin freezes in place.
"I'm sorry, what?"
"1 colon 65 dash 9." Dick explains, still flicking between him and Bruce. "It means you've been adopted into the family and we should all treat you as such, no questions asked."
"Tell you what, I'm about to ask a question." Danny says, dumbstruck. "You just told me it was a code to identify time travellers, not anything about being adopted! What the hell, B?"
Bruce looks about as shellshocked as Danny feels.
"We must have been close," he says finally, after opening and closing his mouth like a fish out of water a few times.
"No! Not that close!" Danny reels back, taking a deep breath ready to refute it all, but... "Well, I mean, you found me when I first got stuck, and you helped me get better despite being... And then we fought together against the, uh, bad guy, before he, um, he... before you couldn't."
An uncomfortable beat passes while they all pick up on what Danny tried so hard not to say.
"So, you're not from the future, then, you travelled there and came back?" Tim asks, breaking the tension and leaning forward with a glint in his eye.
"Yeah, it was a whole end of the world thing, but don't worry about it," Danny says with a hand wave, "It's all kosher now, won't ever happen."
"What did happen?"
"Seriously, don't worry about it, we cool."
"How long in the future was it?"
"About ten years? You were pretty spry for an old man, B," Danny laughs, wishing they'd get off the topic of what happened and get back to the adoption bit.
Everyone shares degrees of a cautious smile as they relax out of the shock, and Dick—whose grin is the biggest—says, "No wonder you got the family code, you're already riffing on him like one of us. How long were you there for?"
"A week, before I managed to get back to my present and stop him then."
"A week? Jeez, B, that has to set some kind of record, seriously."
"Oh!" Danny says, sitting bolt upright and blinking in surprise before pointing at Dick and bouncing in his seat. "You're Nightwing!"
"What?"
"That's exactly what Nightwing said when Batman told me the code! Makes so much more sense now."
Dick laughs and claps his hands, delighted.
"You were not formally adopted?" The grumpy small one—Dami?—asks, his face pinched.
"I didn't even know I was informally adopted."
"And your parents? Are they alive or dead?"
"Damian, stop—"
"They were dead in the future, but they're alive now." Danny says, looking down. He fiddles with the tablecloth, twisting the fabric around his fingers as he fights down the pang of sadness that he always feels when he thinks of them now. He forces a bright smile on his face and hopes it doesn’t look too strained. "I just, uh, can't talk to them much, anymore."
"Damian," Dick warns, "1 colon 65 dash 9. Treat them as family, no questions asked."
"This is Damian treating him as family, the little turd has no manners." Tim scoffs, rolling his eyes, but he gently bumps shoulders with Danny to knock him out of his funk. Danny can't help but send him a watery smile.
"I have the most exemplary manners, Drake, unlike some people." Damian spits, crossing his arms with a pout. "I was merely ascertaining his status to see how he could possibly fit into the family."
"I know this is all a bit sudden, Danny," Bruce smiles, ignoring Damian and reaching out to lay a warm hand on his arm, "for all of us. But if I felt strongly enough to give you that code after spending a week with you in the future, then you are more than welcome in this family, if you so choose it. I think I can speak for all of us when I say we'd like to get to know you a bit more."
"I know a threat when I hear it, Bruce." Danny snorts. "But, yeah, I get it. I'm sorry this is all so weird, it really wasn't how I wanted to find you again, but... I'm glad I did."
"So are we, Danny." Dick says, with a warm smile. "And formally or not, 1 colon 65 dash 9 means you're family. Welcome to the fun house! No take backs or refunds, sorry. You're stuck with us."
#dpxdc#dcxdp#dc x dp#dp x dc crossover#batpham#hailsatanacrab🦀🦀writes#look. this has been in my mind for so long guys so long - and idk if its canon that the batfam have codes for time travel situations or what#but i feel like ive seen it before and if its not canon it should be#so here - how i think that would be funny to go down#i have so many thoughts about TUE and its place in a dpxdc crossover like holy shit there's so many ways it can go!!#i have another wip in the works thats kinda similar to this but with superman and i cannot wait to work on it again#there are so many ways i wanted this to go but i just couldnt get there - i wanted to keep it on the shorter side but like#perhaps ill have to expand#i just love the idea that like. theres a stranger at your table who knows you and knows you well. who knows the secret that youd die to keep#there's a stranger at your table and he says something and you know he's family. you know you're strangers but now...#now you have to be something more#oh man theres so many juicy ways it can go and I KNOW I DID NONE OF THEM#i want to write this whole plot again and make it angstier#(me with everything)#anyway! sorry love you all hope you enjoy it!!
7K notes
·
View notes
Note
PLEASREE PLEASE SHOW MORE EQUIGAM ART PLEASE!!!!!!
When in doubt — post yaoi art. Or however the saying goes. Perchance.
#doodle#homestuck#gamzee makara#equius zahhak#equigam#thanks for the ask!#and sorry it took so long lol#why the fuck did i decide to ship the two bitches with the akwardest to mash together names possible#and i cant come up with something cute cus people wouldn't know wtf I'm talking about#also i have basically zero imagination#i saw the twitter hs ship pole and that equigam was in it BUT FOR MY OWN GOOD#i decided not to follow it cus i would get insanely tilted lol#apparently it already caused some funny drama so I'm not missing out lmao#anyway I've been preoccupied with Halloween prepping and planing my costume#so wish me luck in making hs horns for the first time lol
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
#polls#bullying#tumblr polls#poll#idk what the fuck to tags things as ever shrug#basically i was super super suspicious of anyone who ever asked me out by the time i got into high school#simply because it had happened so many times before#i just assumed no one would ever want to date me for real and that i was so comically disgusting that it was funny to pretend#anyways if this happened to you i'm sorry!! i hope things are better now
15K notes
·
View notes
Text
you think YOU had a bad day at work?
bonus: sid shrieking "no!!!! NO!!!!!" loud enough to be heard in the stands and on camera
#this is now my FAVOURITE game i've watched in real life knocking the game misconduct one off the number one rank#he was so annoyed the entire game and so annoying about it :')#he kept shrieking away on the bench and i couldn't hear a word from where i was seated#but you could just hear this constant yipping away dhfsgfkjshgfsjf PLEASE it was so funny your 36-year-old babygirl was BARKING#drew kept sitting there like... is mom okay... i don't think mom's okay...#also extremely good for me (since he wasn't really hurt) was the whumpfest of it all oh my god what ancient gods did he anger.........#geno kept Hovering in concern#po kept giving him little shoulder pats the way a sweet brave babyboy would try his best to soothe a rabid little dog#ek of course kept trying to slide right inside him and also kept skating up to him and STARING him in the face in concern/lust/both#also guys this is my first time in canada ever!!!!!!!! i'm excited#anyway. very good game for me sorry for this post but you know i love a#long post#sidney crosby#evgeni malkin#pittsburgh penguins#also!!! to all who celebrate#ramadan kareem/eid mubarak#<333 staying with a friend here through the eid celebration and they've been cooking and everything smells so good
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
really specific hangups
[ids in alt]
#in stars and time#isat#poorly drawn isat#isat siffrin#isat mirabelle#isat bonnie#isat isabeau#isat odile#isat loop#odile saying 'sorry siffrin you showed vulnerability so we have to kill you now' arose in my mind unbidden#and this comic was the result.#ended up losing the third panel and had to redraw the whole damn thing.#i think the possibility of one of the characters just laying out a perfectly timed f-bomb is hilarious to me.#it doesnt matter which one. literally any of them would be funny.
3K notes
·
View notes
Text
peanut butter and jellyfish
contents ౨ৎ ⋆ h. shinsou x fem reader. 5k words — fluff. cursing. comforting insecurities. friends to secret lovers.
⭑ shenanigans with your not-so-secret boyfriend ft. sleepovers with eri, a cat eating pizza on you at 3am, your classmates being nosy, and an aquarium date.
note: your quirk is forensic sight! so ur gc name is the way it is bc ur eyes lol get it
You choke back a laugh as a very focused Eri puts yet another sticker on Hitoshi’s face.
Snacks and pillows are strewn around the inside of the blanket fort the three of you finished building moments before. Stiller than a rock, your calm best friend sits there cross-legged so that Eri can give him a makeover of unicorns, stars, and rainbows.
“Do you think he looks pretty yet?” Eri tilts her head at you.
“Like a real-life princess.” You giggle. “Good job, Eri!”
“Yay!” She happily high fives the hand you hold up for her. “Do you feel pretty yet, Hito-nii?”
“I feel so bonita.” Hitoshi deadpans, sending you two into another fit of giggles.
“You were pretty already, Toshi,” you coo, rubbing a thumb over the sticker of a cat making sushi on his cheekbone. Mr. Aizawa must have bought that one for her.
Hitoshi pretends to shyly gaze at you from under his long lashes. “Aw, really?”
His lips curve into a lazy smile, and a heat that you’re all too familiar with rises up your neck, you turn away–a little too quickly, to Hitoshi’s amusement.
“Nevermind you’re ugly.”
He laughs and the heat creeps up to your cheeks.
Such a simple sound, yet that soft, husky voice of his always manages to make your insides a mushy mess, even when you had painfully tripped over his cat, Celery, when he transferred and first moved into the dorms with your class.
The normally stoic, reserved purple-haired boy had doubled over with an uncontrollable wheeze, supporting himself on the sofa as your groaning self was sprawled across the floor.
God, they were lucky they were both cute.
Yet, you couldn’t help but smile as he reached a hand out to help you up, the other still covering his mouth.
That was the first time you made him laugh, and now, you’ve heard it so many times that you could finally stop counting on both your hands’ fingers but you still wanted more.
“Want me to paint your nails, Eri?” You ask, scooting over to your bedroom’s drawer.
You open it, your own light blue nails painted a color that reminds you of the sea against the pastel pink of the treasure box you take out. It had a heart-shaped diamond on the latch.
The heavy box was filled with a collection of nail polish the girls in your class usually used for their sleepovers as well, and new bottles, mostly varying shades of apple red, started mysteriously appearing the day after Eri said she had never gotten painted her nails before.
“Yes!” Eri’s eyes sparkle. “Can I please have matchy nails with Hito-nii?”
“Of course, sweetie.” You smile. She was adorable.
Hitoshi rubs the back of his neck. “You sure you want yours black this time, Eri?”
“Yes!” She huffs stubbornly. “Like dad’s clothes and those things under your eyes!”
“Hey!” He protests. She shares a mischievous look with you and you both giggle, catching the pillow Hitoshi gently throws at you.
“Oreo wouldn’t treat me like this.” Hitoshi reaches out to ruffle Eri’s hair and she squeals in protest, batting his hand away.
Eri holds up the oversized panda plushie he was talking about. It was comically bigger than her, and you had to bite back a laugh.
The moment you two spotted it in the claw machine outside Shinsou’s favorite cat cafe near campus, you knew you had to win it to add to her ever growing collection of stuffed animals.
With a grin, you remember the huge sigh of relief Shinsou let out when it finally fell into the chute.
“Duh he wouldn’t ‘cause you’re his twin!”
Hitoshi mock gasps. “Take that back.” And tickles her neck, barely dodging as you throw the pillow he threw earlier back at him.
“Woah!”
Except much, much harder.
“Don’t worry Eri, I'll protect you!” You grab another nearby pillow and throw it at him, which he easily catches in mid-air with one hand like it was a frisbee.
“Aw.” You pout. Mr. Aizawa was training him a little too good now.
Eri pats your arm to console you. “It’s okay I appre-shee—apree-shee—“
“Appreciate?” You offer, and her face brightens as she nods.
“Appree-shee-ate. You. For trying.” She finishes shyly.
“Aw, thank you Eri. I appreciate you too.”
Hitoshi’s eyes soften at the sight of you two.
“What about me?”
You scowl. “You can go duck yourself, Toshi.”
“Love you too.”
Eri suddenly gasps.
“Dad says that to Uncle Zashi too!”
Despite already knowing the answer, Hitoshi and you turn to look at her suspiciously.
“…Which one?”
As if he knows you’re talking about him, Aizawa yells down the hallway.
“Eri, brats, pizza’s here!”
─────────
“Can I have another hug?” Hitoshi asks coyly after class one day.
The bell had just rung, and you roll your eyes at his leaning form on the wall of the almost empty hallway.
Everyone was leaving for lunch.
Except you two, but that was Hitoshi’s fault.
“I just gave you one!”
“Oh no.” He places a dramatic palm to his forehead. “I think I’m going to pass out because of someone if I don’t get a hug in the next five seconds.”
“Greedy ass.” You sigh, wrapping your arms around his waist.
He hides a grin, shuffling closer to close the gap between your bodies.
Hitoshi smells like fresh linen with hints of sunshine, probably from his daily bike ride he took around campus before class started, and the coffee he brewed this morning.
A sense of comfort settles into your bones as the familiar scent envelopes you, and you breathe it in.
He softly tucks your head under his chin as you nuzzle your face deeper into his chest, your headache from taking the quiz in Ectoplasm’s class earlier now long gone.
“Did you know that when cats see that it's raining outside a window, they go to another window in the same room to check if it's still raining outside?” Hitoshi randomly whispers.
“I did not know that.” You giggle. His lips feel ticklish on your hair. “Does Celery do that too?”
“All the time.” Hitoshi grins. “I have a video from yesterday’s storm, I’ll show you in the cafeteria.”
“Ooh okay!”
He straightens, and takes your hand, your fingers easily lacing through his as you both start to head in the direction of the dining hall.
When you trip over nothing, he snorts, already expecting it, and catches your waist before you take a fall that will be difficult for your ego and your knees to recover from.
“Careful,” he says as you clutch onto his school uniform in relief, and you swear that already deep, smooth voice of his drops an octave on purpose, almost sending you to the ground again.
Hitoshi’s thumb is still tracing small circles on the back of your hand as the both of you join the line for the traditional school lunch. You could try a different cuisine tomorrow. On today’s menu was miso seaweed soup with a side of grilled fish and a milk bread roll along with, of course, rice.
You feel a vibration on the side of your leg, and for the umpteenth time this school year you thank UA for adding pockets to the school uniform’s skirts as you slip your phone out. The jellyfish charm Hitoshi got for your birthday last year dangles from your case.
Surprise, surprise, it’s the class group chat.
-forklift uncertified -
it’s barbie bitch
guysss guess what i sawwww
invisi-girl
IS IT TODOROKI IN A PINK TUTU
pikachew
girl what
invisi-girl
u guys don’t get the vision
i saw it in a dream last night
the rock
nah i get it dude
that would be so manly
ice spice
I would not be completely opposed to the idea
invisi-girl
SEE
it’s barbie bitch
it’s even better >_<
it’s barbie bitch
hitoshituckingyourhair
behindearwithasoftsmile.png
mochi cheeks
OHMYGOD!?1?2?2
SOCUTEEEEETES
airpods with wires
i saw that
airpods with wires
can yall not flirt before lunch
next time i’m gonna throw
up before i get to eat
sue you
AWWWW OUR LITTLE BABYS ALL GROWN UP
forensic balls [you]
FUCK U GUYS IM 17
yaomomo
exactly
a Baby :)
forensic balls [you]
yaoyao ur supposed
to be on my side </3
yaomomo
sorry my love i cannot
deny the facts </3
pikachew
Nahhh only shinsou can call her that guys ;))))
airpods with wires
wah wah wah
forensic balls [you]
one more word and i’m gonna change the gc name to fornite jiggle physics
sue you
NO
yaomomo
No thank you
my chemical romance
what a mad banquet of darkness
it’s barbie bitch
babe look me in the
eyes this isn’t like you
forensic balls [you]
try me.
pikachew
DO ITTTTTTT
forensic balls [you]
ok just bc u told me to
i won’t now
scotch tape
dayum rip denks
forensic balls [you]
also not my fault u guys
have early ass birthdays smh
shirt guy
Senior citizen core fr
forensic balls [you]
ily midoriya
shirt guy
ilyt pookie xx
kazoo-ki
Girl u aint slick
shirt guy
You’re so late omg
pikachew
bro has us on mute
kazoo-ki
shut up dunce face
kazoo-ki
How tf do I change my name
mochi cheeks
LMFAO
wiki-how
Bakugo it is fairly simple.
wiki-how
First you click on your profile, then your personal settings.
wiki-how
From there you press “Change Display Name” and you should be able to enter your name of preference.
kazoo-ki
K
better than you
Thanks glasses ig
wiki-how
You are very welcome.
kiri the rock
nice one dude!
sue you
wow egotistical much
better than you
You wish yours was as big as mine
pikachew
that’s what he said
it’s barbie bitch
omg it just hit me
it’s barbie bitch
the first person to
finally get bitches in our class
it’s barbie bitch
i’m so happy i could cry
pikachew
I GET BITCHES
sue you
yeah over the screen
we're talking irl
pikachew
leave me and my otome games alone
forensic balls [you]
real
forensic balls [you]
AND IM NOT DATING HITOSHI
it’s barbie bitch
HITOSHI????????
airpods with wires
first name basis is crazy
forensic balls [you]
fuck i mean *shinsou
scotch tape
y’all smell that
the rock
peeeyew
pikachew
smells like sum bullshiiii
kazoo-ki
Could’ve fooled me
yaomomo
You aren’t??? :(
yaomomo
But I wrote a reminder to wish
you two happy anniversary and
even bought tea to celebrate!
forensic balls [you]
….for what date
yaomomo
April 1st :(
forensic balls [you]
………………
airpods with wires
@ it’s barbie bitch we can see u
across the cafeteria u are BAWLING
eyebags
what the fuck
Hitoshi bites back a laugh as your widened eyes meet his, glancing up from your phone.
“Not dating, huh?” He grins.
You groan and pinch his arm. “I panicked okay! I didn’t know what to tell them.”
“Hmm, do you want me to?”
“I mean, only if you want to.” You shyly play with his fingers.
“I kind of like us being a secret from them for a little longer. It feels… nice.”
Hitoshi smiles. “I know what you mean.” He wrinkles his nose. “Though they’re so nosy it looks like they figured it out already.”
“Pffft, yeah.” Mina could definitely sniff out a relationship from miles away, no matter how much PDA you tried to sneakily do in empty hallways.
Hitoshi squeezes your hand in reassurance.
“I like it too.” He leans over, and your eyes are forced to meet the dark violet of his.
The side of Hitoshi’s soft-looking lips, courtesy of the strawberry chapstick he stole from you before class this morning, quirk up as he looks down at you with soft eyes, the ones he reserves for you and random cats he sees on the road.
“Chapstick thief,” you mutter.
“Oh, you want it back?” Hitoshi grins. “Kiss it off me then.”
Your cheeks grown warm. “Not here!”
“Good,” He smirks.
“I prefer keeping you all to myself, anyway.”
─────────
“What’s wrong?”
He’s crouching down so that your eyes have no choice but to meet his from your spot on the bean bag.
He gently pushes the switch in your hands down to your lap and pokes your thigh. You squirm away ticklishly.
“Tell me.”
“No.” You huff, picking your switch back up. “I just wanna play Stardew, leave me alone.”
“Darling.”
Your face flushes at the pet name, and he smirks. His secret weapon still works without fail. Hitoshi didn’t even need to activate his quirk to have you under his thumb.
“You’re not going to feel better if you keep it in. Tell me what’s wrong.”
His nails are still pink, you faintly notice, trying to distract yourself from your very attractive, very insistent boyfriend in front of you with his comforting hands placed on your thighs.
You painted his left hand, and Eri painted his right at the last sleepover you had together. She had insisted that he should match nails with her this time, since she matched with him last week.
It was already terrible and impressive that Hitoshi was a people-reader, even worse that he knew what to do to make you fold so easily and open up.
Curse you Hitoshi, you and your disposition for healthy communication.
You should have never recommended that therapist to him.
“I don’t know,” you finally mumble. He tilts his head, showing you that he’s listening.
“I just feel like I don’t deserve it.”
“Deserve what, sweetheart?” He asks. The softness in his voice is unbearable and what you've been bottling up for weeks finally spills out.
“I feel like I don’t deserve it when good things happen to me.”
Hitoshi blinks, then lets out a snort. Which turns into a full blown laugh coming from his chest.
You shove his face away and he falls on his butt, still chuckling.
“You’re making fun of me!” You say indignantly.
“Sorry, sorry, I just–” He coughs, and takes a breath to recollect himself.
“You say a lot of dumb shit and I think that's the worst thing I’ve heard you say.”
You pout. “I’m feeling very invalidated right now.” Hitoshi rolls his eyes, and his hands reclaim their spot on your skin, except this time he’s gently cupping your face in his hands.
He’s not used to comforting people, but you can see that he’s trying.
“You’re beautiful,” he whispers, and you inhale sharply. “You’re kind, you’re intelligent, and I see you try so hard everyday. You always do a good job when you set your sights on something. Why don’t you deserve good things?”
“I don’t know.” Your gaze is numbly pinned to the silver chain around his neck, the one with a little crescent moon on it that he wears everyday, not even taking it off when he goes to sleep. The one you gave to him.
“That’s okay.”
His thumbs caress your cheeks, and you think you can breathe a little easier.
“Let's think of it this way,” Hitoshi says, still cupping your cheeks, grounding you. “It’s not about whether you deserve it or not. Do you want it?”
You finally meet his eyes, and answer with a voice shakier than you’d like it to be.
“I do. I want good things for myself.”
“Atta girl,” Hitoshi says with a proud quirk of his lips.
You stare at him, your heart suspended in your chest, feeling better but still looking a bit unsure.
Hitoshi notices this from the way you start biting the inside of your cheek, and he leans his forehead against yours. You freeze.
He smells like fruit, like freshly washed blueberries and those ripe strawberries in the kitchen in the dorm’s fridge. “That’s more than enough. We can work from there.”
There’s still a worried furrow between your eyebrows.
“Come on, sweetheart. We can go to the aquarium you love this weekend.”
He smirks as you perk up at that, drinking up the rare, shy expression suddenly on your face again, and leans down to your ear.
“You’re so easy,” Hitoshi whispers.
You grumble, you could hear that stupid grin in his voice.
“Sorry, I can't hear you with your face in my chest.”
You raise your head to glare at him and his heart soars. There was his girl.
God, his smug face was starting to irritate you more and more. "I said that if you were my husband I'd poison your tea!"
“If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
─────────
-thot pockets -
it's barbie bitch
omg guess who i just saw
cuddling in front of the tv
it's barbie bitch
youwrappedlikeaburritoinhitoshisarms.png
dating allegation #1
MINA WTF DELETE THAT
dating allegation #1
WHY R U STALKING US
[dating allegation #2 saved an image]
dating allegation #1
BRO WHOS SIDE ARE YOU ON
dating allegation #1
PURPLE MINION LOOKING BITCH
dating allegation #2
ok forensic penis
dating allegation #2
who changed my user
pikachew
me
cuz u guys are NOT beating
them :laughcry::laughcry:
ice spice
I am just confused as to why
you two are sitting on each other
ice spice
When the rest of the couch
appears to be unoccupied
ice spice
Perhaps this is a new
procreation method?
mochi cheeks
TODORKIWHATHAHVDHSHA
pikachew
LMDFAOOOOOOOOO
ice spice
?
dating allegation #1
WHATTHEFUKC
the rock
never change bro
sue you
IACTAULKYLCANT BREATHE HELP
it’s barbie bitch
ME NEITEHHR
dating allegation #2
Whenever my eyebags get darker
dating allegation #2
Just know I blame it on all of you
─────────
“Celery?” You mutter, rubbing your bleary eyes. “What are you doing?”
“Mrow.” The cat continues eating the slice of… pizza? On your chest.
It looks like the one that you and Hitoshi ordered earlier after quizzing each other for Present Mic’s exam.
“I love you so much but I am so confused.”
You reach for your phone to text Hitoshi, your still-asleep hands fumbling a bit on the nightstand.
toshi <3 [12 hrs ago]
us
you [12 hrs ago]
literally us <3
toshi <3 [12 hrs ago]
want to order takeout and
watch ouran highschool after
we study for tmrws exam
you [12 hrs ago]
yes please omg
you [now – 03:24]
hey
can u explain why ur daughter
is eating pizza on my boobs
at 3am
toshi [03:30]
whar
?
toshi [03:31]
OHfMGOD
CELERU
Not even five minutes later, he’s knocking on the door to your room. You open it, and the sight of a very sleepy looking Hitoshi greets you. His already unruly bedhead is even messier than usual and you’re pretty sure he’s wearing his shirt backwards. Did he put it on before coming over?
Wait.
You blink, long and hard, banishing the thoughts of a groggy, very shirtless Hitoshi lying in his bed, with the light of his phone screen illuminating his handsome features as he replies to your text. Those four hours of sleep must finally be hitting you.
Hitoshi sees you blinking, and takes it as a sign you’re still in shock at the pizza monster in your lap.
He gives an awkward pat to your shoulder in reassurance.
“I think this is just how she shows affection.” Hitoshi stares down at Celery fondly.
The way you stroke her fur so softly makes his chest feel warm and tingly.
“Does she eat leftover pizza off your chest at three in the morning?”
“...No.”
“Hah. She said she likes me better. ” You smirk victoriously. “Isn’t that right sweetie?”
The calico cat purrs as you scratch her ears, a bit of tomato sauce under her chin. Hitoshi exaggeratedly puts his hand over his heart at this scene of betrayal.
“Seriously? Celery, I took you off those streets and raised you like I was the one pregnant with you for nine months.”
“Mrow.” She bumps her head against your hand.
“Pfft, give it up Toshi. It’s time for you to hand over the adoption papers.”
Hitoshi rubs the back of his neck. “Or we could just share custody.”
“What?” Your cheeks grow warm. “You want me to be her mom?”
“I mean you kind of already are. Look at her,” he says, eyes softening as he looks at the two of you.
Celery has her paw on your arm. After eating until her little tummy was full, she was already starting to doze off.
“She takes after me.”
You let out a derisive snort.
“Yeah you looked just like that after our binge marathon today too."
“Not in that way.”
He smirks at your confused reaction.
“Then what do you mean–”
At that moment, Celery decides it’s the perfect time to snuggle into your tank top, smearing what’s left of the pizza on her face all over it.
Hitoshi’s eyes widen. He laughs, covering his mouth.
You’ve never been so glad you chose to wear black to sleep.
─────────
“Trouble child, you’re here.”
“Hi Mr. Aizawa.” You roll your eyes. “When are you going to stop calling me that, it’s getting old.”
“When you stop getting into trouble.”
“Okay, that’s fair.”
“The kid’s almost ready.” He snorts. “About damn time. Been up since six.”
“He has?” Your eyes widen. “For what?”
Your teacher smirks. “Nerves. Isn’t this his, what, tenth time taking you out though?”
A flustered Hitoshi suddenly appears from behind him with a light pink dusting his cheeks and steers Aizawa back to the door. “O-okay dad that’s enough.”
He’s cutely dressed in a soft-looking grey cardigan over a white shirt and black wide-legged pants.
This had to be the most boyfriend he’s looked, ever, and he looked very boyfriend all of the time.
“Hitoshi?” You do a little twirl for him in your own outfit. “Fire or nah?”
He looks up from his phone, where he’s googling the bus route to the aquarium, except his eyes linger. Without skipping a beat, he responds.
“Fire.”
“Toshi, you’re staring.”
“Of course I’m staring.” He says it with a tone like 'what else would I be doing?'
You shyly fidget with the edge of your shorts. “Why?”
“Because you’re beautiful.”
Hitoshi reaches out a hand, like he hasn't just casually left you breathless, and his own eyes soften as he notices your starry-eyed look.
“Let’s go, you crybaby.”
“Damn. I was going to say you look handsome too, but I don’t remember being the one who sobbed my eyes out watching Your Name last night.”
The tips of his ears turn red.
“Shut up.”
“Was like our fifth rewatch too.”
“Shut up before I kiss you.”
"Is that a threat or a promise?"
"Both."
‧₊˚ 🐚 ✩ ₊˚ 🌊 ⊹ 𓇼
Hitoshi’s lips twitch as he sees your eyes light up at the sight of the sign pointing in the jellyfish exhibit’s direction. “You’re adorable.”
“Thanks.” You grin. “You’re slow.”
You take him by the arm, your brain faintly registering how muscular his bicep is despite holding it so many times, and drag him along.
In their tanks, the glow of the moon jellies fills the darkness in front of them as other visitors murmur around you two in awe. Blue light reflects off the water and through the glass, illuminating your boyfriend’s dreamy features and you can’t help but admire how pretty he looks.
Hitoshi turns from watching the jellyfish to face you, fingers now lacing through yours. You don’t look away.
A soft smile flickers across his face when he catches you staring at him.
“This reminds me of when we first met.”
You smile. You remember. He was the one Mina relentlessly teased you for staring at, which you completely denied at the time.
“Why’re you so thirsty?” You remember her whispering into your ear at the Sports Festival in your first year. The both of you were sitting in your class’s designated spots in the stands.
Your eyes had widened, scandalized.
“I am not!”
“Please. You’re totally staring at him.”
“Who?”
“Shinsou Hitoshi.” She grinned. “Cute, right?”
Of course she paid attention when they announced his name specifically.
You could never remember anyone’s, and she probably saw you looking at his picture for a little too long when it appeared on the Jumbotron’s screen, announcing that his match with Oijiro was about to begin.
“Not really,” you lied, a bad attempt at feigning disinterest.
Like your eyes hadn’t been trailing down his lean figure the moment his next match started.
Or noticing how attractive it was the way he casually folded his arms when he taunted Midoriya, or wondering in your mind if his perpetual bed-head was as soft as it looks.
Mina turned to you, smirking at your slightly dazed expression.
“Really? Then you wouldn’t mind if I told him you had some questions about his quirk and wanted to talk about it after this, riiight?”
“What?” You shake your head furiously. “I mean his quirk is really interesting but–ugh Mina, no!”
“For the plot!” She waggled her eyebrows.
You nudged her knee with a huff. “I’m breaking up with you.”
“Nooo, I’m kidding, I’m kidding.” Mina eyed you cheekily. “I won’t call him over.”
“Oh thank god.”
“But only if you admit he’s your type.”
You groan. “Okay fine. I think he’s hot, happy?”
“Very.” Your best friend laughs, pure happiness indeed written all over her face. You can see the matchmaking gears already turning in her head. “I just know you too well, babe.”
You roll your eyes. “Sometimes I really wish you didn’t.”
“Come on, you guys would be so cute together though.” She sighs dreamily. “Forensic sight and mind-control? Plus you’re both hot as fuck? Talk about a power couple.”
“....I think I’m going to go sit with Yaomomo instead.”
Recalling the memory, you laugh. “I know, we kept accidentally making eye contact after your second match because our seats were right across from each other.”
“That awkward prolonged eye contact in the stands might’ve been how I started crushing on you.”
You smirk. “You had a crush on me? That's so embarrassing.”
“I know.” He rolls his eyes, softly tucking a stray hair behind your ear. “Worst decision of my life.”
You hold Hitoshi’s hand tighter as you step closer to his side to get a better view of the tank.
“Glad the feeling is mutual.”
You spot it before he does.
“Oh my god Toshi. We need to get this for Eri.”
He spins around from the collection of the aquarium’s official shirts for sale, a shirt with a print of a whale shark in his hands.
“Wha–oh my god.”
Hitoshi stares at the giant penguin plushie you’re holding in front of you.
It was bigger than you–no, bigger than him even.
“Not sure if it’s going to fit on the train home, but we’ll make it work.”
─────────
"Can you teach me how to draw a unicorn too, Eri?" Hitoshi asks.
You had already asked Eri before him seconds ago so you stick your tongue out at Hitoshi, mouthing ‘copycat,’ and he tilts his head down to quickly kiss your neck, making you giggle.
He still has a pink bow wrapped around his bicep from when you three played dress up an hour ago, and you fight the urge to laugh again at how silly he looks.
Eri is too focused on her drawings to care about either of you, and after she scribbles around a little more, she turns to face her older brother.
“Yeah!” She hands him a red crayon. “Okay, so first you draw half of a circle.”
Hitoshi follows Eri’s instructions.
He lifts his hand, which nearly covers the paper, to reveal a red ‘C’ that looks like it got run over by a truck.
“No, no not like that! Erase it.” She frowns disapprovingly, hands on her hips. “You’re really bad at this Hito-nii.”
“Please Eri-sensei. I'm trying my best.”
“Try harder!” She turns away with a huff, then peers over at your paper.
“Ooh yours looks so good!” Eri claps, and you smile proudly.
“It’s all thanks to you, Eri.” You reach out to fix her pigtail that was starting to slip out of the cat-patterned scrunchie, and she giggles, holding still for you.
Hitoshi grumbles. “This smells like favoritism.”
“That’s ‘cause your unicorn looks Celery’s poop!” Eri chirps. Then she runs away to the kitchen right before you double over in laughter at Hitoshi’s extremely offended face, clutching onto his broad shoulders for support.
“She said your drawing looks like shit!” You snort, and he groans.
Celery’s ears perk up in Hitoshi’s lap and she meows, looking in your direction. You hold out your arms. “Celery, you want uppies?”
She ignores them and decides to sit in your lap instead, purring softly.
“Mrow.”
“Yeah? And then what?” You coo, gently rubbing her fuzzy forehead, and her eyes close in contentment.
She mewls again, pawing at your sock and you laugh.
“Okay, okay I’ll tell him.”
Looking up at Hitoshi, he tilts his head the same way Celery does when you talk to her.
You bite back a laugh, you’re not sure who’s the cat in the room at this point.
“What did she say?” He asks you curiously.
All you do is blink slowly at him in response.
Hitoshi’s brows knit in confusion.
Then his eyes widen, a soft pink starting to color his cheeks.
Shyly, he slowly blinks back.
Suddenly, the gray-haired girl comes back from the kitchen, apples Aizawa sliced like rabbits for her on a plate in her hands.
You’re still slowly blinking at each other as she walks through the door.
Eri looks at the both of you weirdly.
“What are you two doing?”
“Mrow.”
teehee hitoshi’s the pb to ur jelly(fish) get it
#shinsou lovers pls find my acc i love u ur so sexy#i think it’s funny bc u like fish and hitoshi likes cats so he jokes abt eating u LOL#i wanted to give it like a shoujo-y skip and loafer kinda title :3#fellow shinsou enjoyers i hope u like it#hitoshi shinsou x reader#shinsou x reader#hitoshi shinso x reader#mha x reader#mha oneshot#shinsou fluff#mha fluff#bnha x reader#ALSO ik it's a very common hc but shinsou would not use lavender scented products bc they're toxic to cats!!! HE WOULDNT RISK IT#would also not use a diffuser for his sleep sorry bc the oils from it can harm cats and their fur :/#he just thugs it out and drinks chamomile tea or smth#takes a melatonin every night#stop the shinsou smells like lavender allegations#bffr he would hate lavender purely for the fact that it’s poisonous to cats#I think shinsou would enjoy bath and body works scents#tho
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
For decades, the blank vision that Iudex Neuvillette wears near his heart has been subject to much discussion in Fontaine. Nobody remembers who it had once belonged to or why the ancient dragon protected it so jealously. It is said that if the Chief Justice would to stare at it for a long while, it would be sure to rain right after. Oh, how beloved that person must've been.
#genshin impact#genshin fanart#neuvillette#visions#wriolette#wriollette#neuvithesley#myart#sorry for the short drabble?#kasndkansd i have emotions over a simple thought i had#the tragedy for someone eternal to fall for someone who's here for only a brief moment eats away at me hhhh#it started with a funny thought of IF neuvillette needs to carry a fake vision for some reason after laughing at the archons for it#and then i remembered how people like kazuha would hold onto their loved one's masterless vision after they died#one thing led to another and now we have some wriolette angst with neuvillette cherishing wrio's masterless vision#after his inevitable passing#and idk if its just the traveller or if its even canon#but i like to think that neuv being a sovereign he would be able to hear the ambition of one's vision and maybe just maybe#he can use wrio's masterless vision to listen to his voice albeit ever so softly
4K notes
·
View notes
Text
Baby weirded out the others in FNAF sister location..
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#circus baby#ballora#funtime freddy#funtime foxy#bonbon#elizabeth afton#william afton#sister location#fnaf fanart#it’s so funny that baby gets kicked out of the ennard group#my impression has been that baby started to think like Elizabeth#so her goals etc started to skew away from the group and more what she wanted#BUT BABY herself seems confused in sister location about Elizabeth#how she ‘sometimes still hears her’#so her blurting out she’s actually cool with William is so funny#THE OTHER funtimes would get so ?? over that#baby fumbles her way out of the group#sorry to circus baby you weirded out the locals too much 💔
6K notes
·
View notes
Text
one of my favourite things about AO3 tags is their dedication to canon accuracy, even when that means it devolves into complete mayhem like
Percy was not named with a fan following in mind, this was clearly a running gag but it's his name so they have to use all of it
#adding the 'percy' in there is just adding insult to injury tho#i'm sorry this is so funny to look at#and yes i do think the joke is hilarious actually. aristocracy names are the funniest thing in the world#ao3#(on that note tho dear anglophones please stop capitalising the 'von' in titles)#(taliesin gets a pass because he couldn't have known how much this would blow up it was a home game but. psa i guess)#(today seems to be my 'be pissy about ways to get (pseudo-) german names wrong' day idk)#vox machina#critical role#percival de rolo#(the joke is funny but i will not bother i'm sorry)
2K notes
·
View notes