#sorry guys again if it's working for you have at it it's just for tag blocking purposes

[mommyownsmee]

100 WAYS TO GET BACK AT AN UNWANTED DICKPIC — HAVE FUN! x

1. That’s adorable. Does it come in a size for adults?

2. I’ve seen worms on the sidewalk after it rains that look more impressive.

3. Wow, I didn’t realize you were doing charity work for guys with disappointing anatomy.

4. Ah, a dick pic. Here we go again. The male equivalent of a participation trophy. Completely unnecessary and nobody here asked for it.

5. Bold of you to assume I was desperate enough to be impressed by that.

6. I was having a good day before you sent me that, and now I have to cleanse my phone with fire. Thanks.

7. Is this supposed to be a threat or a cry for help?

8. Sorry, I do not accept unsolicited junk mail :)

9. I hope you didn’t mean for this to be sexy because it just made me laugh out loud😂

10. This looks like something I’d have to scrape off my shoe.

11. Bless your heart, I really didn’t know they made them in travel sizes👀

12. I’ve seen bigger clits.

13. You sent me this like it was supposed to be a treat, but it’s giving medical anomaly.

14. I’d be more impressed if you sent me a credit score over 700

15. Imagine thinking this was the move. Tragic.

16. This is why women fake orgasms.

17. Bro, fr, this is the digital equivalent of flashing someone on a subway—except no one gasped, they just laughed!

18. That’s crazy! Thanks! Anyway, what’s it like living life as a disappointment?

19. Your dick looks like it’s about to deliver bad news in a Disney movie😂

20. You sent this expecting what? Me to be turned on? Sweetie, I’ve seen sexier things in biology textbooks👀

21. You should try OnlyFans. Not for money; just to learn what a decent dick actually looks like!

22. I’d roast it, but it looks like life already did😂

23. Is this a dick pic or a cry for help? Blink twice if you need a hug, bro… (not help because they could say we should help get them off)

24. Your poor mother carried you for nine months for this?

25. Sorry, I don’t accept coupons for disappointment😂

26. Why are you holding a lima bean?

27. If I wanted to see something this pathetic, I’d look at your bank account❤️‍🩹

28. Do you have health insurance? Because that looks concerning😭

29. I’ve seen bachelorette party straws that were more impressive :)

30. Sweetie, I’m gonna need binoculars…

31. Your dick looks like it has performance anxiety😂

32. My vibrator is laughing at you right now.

33. Are you the guy that got the mouse dick transplant? I can tell!

34. Your dick has the same energy as an unseasoned chicken breast.

35. It looks like it’s trying to apologize for existing!😭

36. Bro, did you crop out the ruler because it was too humiliating?😂

37. No wonder you’re single. Even your dick looks like it doesn’t want to be with you.

38. If I had a nickel for every time I saw an unimpressive dick, I’d be richer than you🤑

39. Your dick looks like it’s on probation!?

40. Did you scare it before taking the picture?

41: You‘re just proving my point by showing me how disappointing your dick is!

42: You should frame this as a warning to other men about the dangers of inbreeding!

43. This belongs in a museum exhibit called „Why She Faked It.“

44: Your dick looks like it gives out WiFi signals in the 1800s☹️

45: Do you have to jack off with tweezers?

46: Sir, that’s not a dick, that’s an overconfident skin tag.

47: I zoomed in as much as I can but I still can’t see anything?

48: This should come with a disclaimer: „Objects in picture are even smaller than they appear.“

49: I’d tell you to go fuck yourself, but based on this, I don’t think you’d even feel it????

50. If I wanted to see something this pathetic and underwhelming, I’d watch a nature documentary on endangered worms.

51: Deep throating isn’t even option for you is it? The best you got is teeth tapping and even that’s just a maybe…

52: Your dick looks like it apologizes before it even gets hard😂

53: It looks like it came with a participation ribbon.

54. Your dick should come with a warning label „Caution: May cause depression“.

55: Your dick has the same energy as a flat soda—sad, disappointing, and nobody wants it.♥️

56: You should get that checked, like—medically…

57: Did you take this picture with a microscope, or is that actually it?????

58: Soooo… Where is it? 👀

59: This looks like something an archaeologist would dig up and struggle to identify👀

60: I’d offer constructive criticism, but I don’t think there’s enough material to work with🤷🏻

61: This looks like it would give up after 30 seconds and need a nap😭

62: This is you

63: Are you sure you sent me a dick pic? Because this looks more like an unfortunate birth defect?!😵‍💫

64: You know I have your moms number, right?

65: That thing has the same energy as a man who says „nice guys finish last.“

66: I’d call it ‘cute,’ but I don’t want to insult babies and small animals.🥺

67: Who ever told you your dick is „amazing“ is a liar and probably faked their orgasm🥰

68: This looks like something that legally shouldn’t be exposed to direct sunlight☹️

69: That’s practically an innie at this point.

70: I would file a report but its really not even worth doing the paperwork.

71: Your dick looks like it’s in a permanent state of stage fright.

72: Does it only come out when it rains?

73: Your dick looks like it would ghost me before I even had the chance to block you.

74: It looks like it suffers from low self-esteem, and honestly, it should.

75: Oh wow, I love puzzles! This one is called „find the dick“, right??

76: What ever rock your dick crawled out from under, it needs to go back.

77: Are you sure this isn’t a „spot the difference“ challenge? Because I’m struggling to see one between this and a raw baby carrot?!

78: I’ve seen crayons in kindergarten classrooms with more length and stamina.

79: I think I found your lookalike! looked up tardigrade. The resemblance is uncanny.

80: This looks like a rejected emoji😒

81: Did you have a circumcision or a castration?♥️

82: You should consider doing drag, you wouldn’t even have to tuck with that.

83: Wow, you must have really low standards if that’s your best shot. Good luck with that.

84: Your dick looks like it would ask me to „lower my standards“ in a dating app bio.

85: Is this your way of saying 'I'm compensating for something,' or are you just really into abstract art?

86: Sending this is like offering someone a burnt slice of toast and expecting a „thank you“.

87: You really saw that in your camera roll and thought, „Yes, this is the one“??

88: I’d tell you to grow up, but I see you’re struggling to grow anything at all.

89: Your dick looks like it’s been buffering since birth.

90: Dial up moved faster than your dick.

91: You sent this like it was a gift. Babe, I’d rather receive a parking ticket.

92: If I wanted to see something this sad and underwhelming, I’d watch a sloth try to use an escalator.

93: Is this a „before“ photo for a shrinkage study, or did you just forget to send the „after“ one?

94: Why did you send this to me? Your dick is so tiny I can’t even roast it.

95: Ah, I see you’re auditioning for „Small Parts: The Movie.“ Best of luck with the casting!

96: I’m not into feet, so I can’t figure out for the life of me why you sent me a photo of a pinky toe.

97: Does your mom make you pay rent to stay in the basement or does she keep you there for free so the rest of us don’t have to see you?

98: You should probably go try catching fish and not women with that little bait worm you got there.

99: If i show this to a straight woman she’ll probably become a lesbian.

100: Naked mole rats carry a lot of diseases. You should probably go wash your hands.

A BIG THANK YOU GOES OUT TO ALL OF MY MEMBERS OF MY SAPPHIC GROUP CHAT WHO HELPED AND PUSHED ME TO DO THIS! I LOVE YOU GUYS!!♥️

[crowsofdarkness]

Vas Prizrak: Chapter Five

-gif not mine. credit to owner-

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Female Agent! Reader.

Content Warnings: language, 18 + implied smut, angst, fluff, violence, mentions of losing a pregnancy, thoughts of taking one's life, an attempt to take one's life. I will give another warning when that chapter is posted.

Summary: Bucky and Reader have been in their own solace while in Wakanda for years. They were finally happy to create the life they wanted and deserved. That was until a new foe came along to dust it all away.

Authors Note: This takes place during Infinity War and Endgame! If you haven't yet, please read Soldat and Dorogaya beforehand.

Tags: @globetrotter28 @sakuracyberhex @chinggay85-blog @bookofriverr @misatxox @that-blonde-girl @cats-chaotic-mind @wintrsoldrluvr @sebastians-love @pumpkin-babydoll @ordelixx @starfly-nicole @j23r23 @baw1066 @capswife

Soldat Masterlist | Dorogaya Masterlist | Vaz Prizrak Masterlist

A flirtatious giggle fell from my lips as I pulled the body closer to me, drinking in the warmth. His fingers raked through my hair, plump lips meshing with my own, and his voice caused my heart to skip. 

“I love you,” he breathed across my face. 

The soft tune of music wrapped around us like a ribbon as our body’s danced slowly to the music. One hand linked with my own and the other, vibranium fingers were placed gently on my lower back. 

“I love you too,” I replied. 

“I don’t ever want to forget this moment,” Bucky said. 

Lips curled upward in a soft smile, feeling the love radiate through his body into my own. I stood on my toes to reach his lips, wanting to feel them on mine again, however as I was so close to close the distance Bucky vanished through my fingers. 

He fell to dust in my grasp. 

“Y/N?” 

My eyes snapped open from the dream and Bucky’s ghost was gone, my gaze staring at Steve. 

“Did you say something?” I asked. 

He was standing in front of my seat on the jet, staring down at me with worried eyes. 

“Are you okay?” Steve asked, kneeling in front of me now. “We’ve been on board for a few hours and you haven’t said one word.” 

I shrugged. “There’s not much to say. I’m going to kill Thanos.” 

“Y/N-,” Steve sighed. 

“Are we done here?” I questioned, interrupting him with a hard gaze.

I went to stand, wanting to end this conversation, however Steve’s hand gripped my thigh to stop me. 

“I understand that you’re angry at everything and everyone right now but to take it out on me is bullshit,” he said. 

The anger in his eyes made the anger in my body dissipate, guilt pulling at my heart. Steve had been by my side ever since the snap and I knew it was wrong of me to take my pain out on him. 

“I’m sorry,” I muttered. 

Steve lifted my chin. “This is going to work, Y/N. We’re going to get him back.” 

I let out a shaky breath, trying to hold back the tears. 

“It has too because I don’t know what I would do if it doesn't,” I admitted. 

With a soft sigh, Steve stood to his feet and placed a kiss on the top of my head, and walked over to Nat. They conversed, something unreadable from my spot a few meters away. For a quick moment, the thought of Bucky left my mind and was replaced with the thought of Steve. 

Our relationship was confusing to a lot, me included. We shared a bed every night, some nights we would find ourselves entangled together when I would have nightmares of the snap. Steve was there, pulling me into his arms to soothe me. 

I knew that deep down Steve still felt the same way towards me as he did years ago but I couldn’t give him the same feelings. My heart will always be with Bucky. 

“Guys, it’s just him.” 

My eyes snapped to the front of the ship where Carol flew in place in space. She had flown down to the planet to scope out, seeing what we were up against. 

“Perfect,” I muttered as we all got ready for the descent below. 

The lone cabin in the middle of an open field meant nothing to any of us as I blasted a large flame towards the door, it falling to ash in seconds. Carol, Bruce, and Rhodey were inside in seconds, holding Thanos in place. 

Thor, who held the same rage as I, busted inside and with a swift movement of Stormbreaker, Thanos’ hand with the gauntlet fell to the ground with a thud. His cries were nothing to me, as the fire still burned at my fingertips. 

Steve, Nat, and I stepped inside, all side by side just like how we used to be back in the day. 

Rocket went to pick up the fallen gauntlet but when he turned it over,  a gasp fell from his lips. 

“Oh no,” Rocket muttered. 

The stones were gone. 

“Where are they?” Steve asked. 

“The stone served no purpose besides temptations,” Thanos said. 

“YOU MURDERED TRILLIONS!” I bellowed, my banshee scream caused him to fly back to the other end of the cabin. 

His broken body lay at my feet and Thor had to hold me back from setting him a blaze right there. 

“Where are the stones?” Nat asked, tears in her eyes. 

“Gone. Reduced to atoms,” Thanos choked. 

“You used them two days ago!” Banner screamed. 

“I used the stones to destroy the stones, it nearly killed me in the process,” Thanos admitted. “I am inevitable.” 

Blackness took over my vision and the heat burned low in my stomach. Whatever hope we had about bringing everyone back was gone, along with the stones. 

Thanos and Gamora exchanged words but it meant nothing to me, white noise in the background. Without a second thought, I shot a fire ball into his face, his cries being short lived as Thor went for the head, rolling below to our feet. 

“Y/N,” Steve spoke while he reached for my hand. 

I smacked him away, tears welling in my eyes. “You promised.” 

His heart sank at my broken words. 

“We’ll find a way,” he tried to reassure me. 

“No! It’s done, Steve. Bucky’s never coming back!” I yelled. 

I turned on my feet to walk away from him, away from all of them, but he stood in front of me to stop me. 

“Where are you going?” Steve asked. 

“Leave me alone,” I snapped trying to get away from him. 

His hands were firm on my shoulders. “I’m not letting you leave.” 

I raised my hands at him, the fire burning to life while my eyes went black again. The flames danced along on my hands. 

“Don’t make me hurt you, Steve,” I hissed. 

Steve reluctantly stepped to the side, letting me leave. He knew that this was a fight that he wouldn’t be able to win. My whole world was gone, never coming back all because Thanos blew the stones to hell. I couldn’t find it in my heart to live anymore. I was tired of fighting for nothing. 

Without giving a second glance back to my friends, my family, I left them all behind. Nothing mattered to me anymore, not even Steve. 

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Look what we've become.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[ruubesz-draws]

Update...

Sorry for being inactive for a while. Life has been hectic to the point where I just haven't had the energy and time to draw things. But I have a few WIPs that I want to finish and hopefully show you guys soon.

Yes, the last two are gijinkas (and I have more)

[bumfuzzled-bee]

Pat pat.

[pixlatedvampire]

I havent finished anything in a bit so please enjoy my favorite Grima doodles lmao 💗🥰

[morelikesin]

🐶 Y'know, I fall in love with you all over again when we go on dates like this, Max.

🐰 You're getting a pass for that awful pun because you're the prettiest thing this side a' the world, Sam.

🐶 What can I say? I'm as corny as Kansas in August.

🐰 And as normal as blueberry pie.

[forcebookish]

the way that phoom is crying and how bittersweet this moment is for him but the look on vicha's face is just pure happiness

SOMEHOW THAT HURTS MORE??

forced to dance and re-experience his death every night for 23 years in a place that only reminds him of who he lost and yet he's just so happy to be reunited, in the most uncomplicated way, knowing that he's where they're meant to be for the remainder of eternity

because phoom thinks it has to end, but vicha knows it won't

[taruruchi]

Keeping promises? (Part 2 of this post)

Notes under the cut!

YES I FINALLY FINISHED IT RAHHHHHHH 19 DAYS AFTER MY BIRTHDAYSJNDJDKD Anyway. The whole necklace thing is a reference to Azul's chat from the lessons!

Shading gave me an aneurysm but at least it's done. My favorite part is the chibis tho so I hope everyone enjoys that <3 Even made Azul go :3 as a treat

Edit: @jewelulu I forgot u wanted me to tag u when I post art, so sorry 😔😔 But yeah new art :D

[eyes-of-nine]

he lived, he served cunt, he got put in a psych ward and probably some other shit but I've been too busy looking at all the domestic fluff to figure out the lore

[xxplastic-cubexx]

snap's uber cringe vampire cherik rambling !!!!!! read at your own risk of charles/erik origins But If They Were Vampires and more !!!!

very simple makeshift vampire age map for the sake of understanding this vague timeline i have (hint: just multiply by ten) this is all subject to change because time is mean and im indecisive

infancy - 0 - 40

childhood - 50 - 120 years

adolescence - 130 - 170 years

emerging adulthood - 180 - 240 years

older adulthood - +250 years

elderly - +700 years

about dhampirs: they're not immortal like vampires, they just have a (much) longer life expectancy than humans (they really are just like 'weaker' vampires in this, only possessing half of their strengths and weaknesses)

'what's our time period' EXCELLENT question brother.

jk i think the main events will be set victorian-edwardian period (1850's-1910's) but charles and erik are at least a couple centuries old- probably born amidst the late 1500's (1580's-90's more specifically), maybe meet during the 1800's

charles' profile

charles heralds from a wealthy vampire family whos had their influence in england for centuries (maybe established roots during the 5th century), the general public none the wiser to their vampirism. at most there's rumors, but the family's charismatic enough to keep the murmurs at bay

brian is like. a little less evil to charles in this timeline. most of their time together being brian teaching charles how to run the family's business and whatever else vampires do to balance the life of a vampire and a human. at most, brian emotionally neglects charles as he stays vigilant in ensuring the xavier family can prosper for centuries. sharon xavier would be the one to instill all that is good and human in charles despite her own vampirism (most likely turned by brian before they had charles)

brian xavier is murdered by human kurt marko once the latter figures out his vampirism right before europe's widespread vampire hysteria (so maybe late 1600's)- not for any heroic purposes but so he can steal the xavier family's wealth of course.

he holds the xavier's vampiric origins over them until his eventual death (maybe early 1700's).

considering the idea charles' accidentally summons a pack of wolves to the house during a heated moment and they tear him apart- maybe kurt tries to protect cain and charles idk. charles wouldn't realize he caused this until much later while learning about his vampirism, BUT im still chewing on this so don't take this as 100% canon to this au.....

kurt never discloses the true nature of the xaviers to cain while he's alive, but as the boys grow older cain figures it out for himself and decides to dedicate his life to hunting down charles- how much of it is to rid the world of one less vampire or to vent the unhappiness he experienced growing up in the xavier household onto his brother is unclear

while kurt was alive, he experiments on charles in an attempt to understand his vampirism in an attempt to achieve eternal life without the drawbacks of vampirism. but i mean how good can your science be: evidently he fails vjELKJALKJ

as an adult, charles is curious about his own vampirism as he attempts to live amongst humans and perhaps help them (maybe not give them eternal life but at least how to extend life). he doesn't seek to 'cure' himself, only figure out how his biology works to live comfortably and safely: after all, there must be a reason as to why he was born this way, he reasons

he pursues a life of medicine to do this and along the way meets moira mctaggart (around late 1700's/early-1800's), a scientist working closely with the occult and isolated from general society. after some time, he reveals he's a vampire to her and they effectively become partners to further understand vampirism (but not romantic partners)

most of their work concerns why vampires 'need blood' and how to find a suitable substitute ('surely it's not blood itself that satiates vampires but a property within it?'), but they also look to find out why vampires can be weak in the sunlight and why they appear immortal (aka: they're purely scientific in their approach to the vampire phenomena instead of thinking it's magical, charles reasoning that vampires are just humans with a type of evolved biology. time will tell if he's right or wrong in this approach, and brother he has plenty of time)

erik's/max's profile

compared to the house of xavier, the house of eisenhardt- while not as wealthy- still maintained some sort of reputation in east prussia. however, the news of their vampirism easier leaks amidst the mid-1700's heightened paranoia of vampires (probably a domino affect of the rumor of Renowned Xaiver Family being one of vampires expanding after kurt's death), and he finds himself to be the only survivor amidst the violence against his family

fleeing further east and with the benefit of his youthful visage despite his real years, max has no problem using his intelligence and experience to find work to support himself and manages life alone until he eventually meets magda (maybe around the same time charles meets moira, 1790's). with her being human, it isn't long until she and max introduce little dhampir anya into the world

he tells magda of his vampiric origins (after all, if they were going to have a baby it'd prob be best to let her know the baby's gonna be part vampire right..), but whether it's disbelief or not fully grasping the implications of such, magda accepts and loves him. max vows never to feed off his wife, mostly feeding off hunted animals to satisfy himself

for a while, max was content to live in relative solitude with his family: he wouldn't bother the humans, and in turn they shouldn't bother him. but soon enough (talking Ten Years Later soon enough), the true nature of max and his family is uncovered in the quaint town they lived in, and history threatens to repeat itself as a growing mob attempts to torch their home. they can't succeed before max makes a bloody example of the mob- a display that frightens magda and has her flee with anya in her arms. that would be the last time max sees his wife and child. he effectively repurposes the site of where he lost his family as a quaint memorial to them and the grounds remain relatively untouched bar his annual visits (the common people more often rumoring it to be cursed as a result)

max would change his name to 'erik lehnsherr' as a way to bury his past and move on with his new, less-human-sympathetic life. uttering his real name weakens his power if not strips them away for some time entirely, so he's greatly secretive to who he tells it to (spoilers: he never tells anyone). he spends most of his time alone in his castle, going out at night to feed off late-night wanderers in nearby cities

as for wanda and pietro, debating on exactly what to do with them and if they're blood related to erik or not. considering having pietro be a dhampir that maintained his superspeed while wanda's still just a witch. not sure what to do about lorna either. at the very least, if they do live with erik, he's greatly protective and overbearing about them (a possible blend of keeping them close to use their might against humans, and not wanting to lose any more of his family)

The Part People Are Here For charles and erik interacting

How Do They Meet wow great questions today !!!

around 1810's, probably during one of erik's Feeding Nights he bumps into charles and attempts to make dinner of him, charles at this point passing far too easily as a regular human. the ensuing encounter/fight eventually leads to charles having to reveal himself also to be a vampire (probably as a result of having to resort to using telepathy to keep erik at bay and thereafter explaining himself)

despite the rocky start, neither can hide the fact they're ecstatic about meeting another vampire and become fast friends. Yknow. After overlooking the Sorry I Tried To Eat You part

so now charles spends his mornings with moira and his humanly duties and at night he sometimes spends time at erik's abode and with his children (if i decide they live with him of course).

moira can't ignore the way charles lights up when talking about erik (and how could she: even if he was candid with her about his experiences, it was an entirely different feeling talking to another vampire who already understood- and perhaps understood better). as such, she doesn't let charles forget erik could potentially be a danger- something charles can't forget if he wanted to (see again: them meeting the first time. still, he chooses to believe in the better parts of erik)

of course charles tries to dissuade erik from seeing humans as purely food or menaces and encourages him to work alongside himself to find more 'ethical' ways to be a vampire, but of course erik is resistant to the idea and at times admonishes charles for his thinking.

Everyone's Favorite Part: The Divorce

for a while- maybe five years- erik isn't aware of moira's existence. but on a night charles neglects to visit him he spots the pair walking to moira's home. following them, he's quick to discover moira's lab and realizes charles has been cooperating with a human this whole time (how much had he told her about erik? how much of their weaknesses did he expose to her? why wouldn't he tell erik about moira sooner if she wouldn't be an issue?)

enraged, erik doesn't wait for an explanation as he barges into the small shack and barks accusations of betrayal at charles. it only gets worse when moira is puzzled that charles didn't tell erik about her when he was more than happy to tell her about erik, only reaffirming erik's suspicions charles was attempting to doom vampires as a whole

what happens next im still up in the air about, but it'll be how charles loses the use of his legs in this universe

scenario a is while erik and charles brawl in moira's shack, she hurls holy water onto erik and disfigures his face. while he's down, she attempts to throw more holy water on him to at least give her and charles more time to escape only for charles to shield him at the final moment. while he's mostly unharmed, his legs get burnt as he pushes erik out of the way and finds he isn't able to regenerate the damaged limbs

scenario b is moira still gets erik with the holy water, however charles drags them out of the shack and tries to break for the nearest town. unfortunately, during their escape erik finds one of moira's silver-tipped crossbows (or something to that affect: still deciding if he should have control over magnetism in this but Details Details) and shoots charles in the spine ultimate style. going off the myth silver is Not Good for all 'unholy' and dead creatures of course, charles' nervous system isn't properly able to regenerate for Above Mentioned Reasons (his body's so 'dead' the antibacterial properties of silver eat away at him). the cruel irony of it all really (or silvery... heh.. metal...)

as a result of being burned by the holy water, erik would wear his helmet more often- at least until he feeds off enough humans to regenerate the damaged tissue (note: only human blood can restore holy-artifact-induced wounds, which means charles won't regain the use of his legs because of his refusal to consume human blood)

either way, once she and charles escape erik and relocate, moira stays with him for some time- at least long enough for charles to get used to his new way of life without his legs and figure out what they should do next, maybe two-three years. eventually, charles and moira agree it might be safer to work apart from each other and effectively split. probably leads to charles moving to america to keep an eye on vampires on the other side of the globe while moira keeps an eye on europe

after the encounter with moira and charles, erik becomes more active and now seeks out other vampires (or humans to turn into vampires), fully intending on converting the world to become a vampire's (and hell why not monsters in general) paradise

Things to iron out

the difference between animal and human blood

Whats the benefit to drinking human blood: is it tastier? More nutritious? Evidently its restorative properties are more potent for vampires than animal blood

Maybe more animal blood is needed to supplement human blood (i.e. one human may need the blood of- say- five pigs or something yk what i mean)

Maybe its possible for a vampire to live off animals only, it’d just be more difficult and they might not be as physically strong as vampires who feed off humans

Would they eventually cave into craving human blood? Is it a conscious effort to Not feed off humans? Curious….

Perhaps moira tests the effects of human vs animal blood on charles, offering blood from her arm both directly from her and extracted first to then drink. He cant argue its wrong if she’s offering for science no…. Its For Science Charles its ok…

Another thing i want to solidify is time period: on one hand i wanna do this modern-ish period but im also thinkin bout the 14th century…. Shrug i still have a lot of finer details In General ill work out with myself. For now it’ll prob remain around 1700’s-1900’s

A final minor thing i wanna work on is erik’s ‘real’ name and his name situation in general, mostly how magda knew him. Maybe changes his name to ‘erik lehnsherr’ after the eisenhardt incident, and goes by ‘magnus’ after magda, her knowing him as ‘erik’ while charles mostly knows him as ‘magnus’. ‘Count magnus’…. Hm…. Dunno if i wanna reintroduce ‘magneto’ into this or not …… ill figure it out at some point …

Perhaps other vampires and dhampirs saying his real name doesn’t negatively affect him and it’s strictly only if humans/non-vampires say it

[lunarharp]

revamped looong mermaid orufrey au :')

[corviiids]

THANKS @kimdokjafan you are so kind and generous. ok im cashing in the first of three blank checks to talk about faith trust and pixie dust (most recent chatfic) because the last two directors commentaries were too serious so let's do a silly one.

some p5r spoilers, and this is mostly about sumire, and it's long again. do i need to keep disclaiming that these are long? you should know me by now.

i had this written for a while before i started formatting it because i wasn't really sure if i should post it? i feel like silly chatfic is something people go to for predominantly lighthearted nonsense so i was like, maybe there's too much plot and dramatic misunderstanding and i should just keep this one for myself. but then i was like well nothing matters and maybe someone will have fun with it. it's kind of terrible how much fully or mostly completed fic there is my docs that just doesn't see the light of day lol. write for yourself etc but i like sharing! too bad it comes with the mortifying ordeal etc. anyway that was a tangent

potato counter is a neopets game. there's no deep lore i just like neopets. i guess in this universe ryuji doesn't play neopets? or maybe he's just never played potato counter specifically. i also have a different fic where ryuji DOES play neopets. it's about neopets and ryuji and goro talking on neopets.

i think this might literally be the first time ive written sumi in a fic because i haven't actually written that much fic for royal, like, now that im looking, literally almost none? and none that had a group dynamic. so it was kind of fun to find her voice for the first time in a silly groupchat like this. i was worried people would find her exclamation marks annoying but i personally thought it was endearing so i added it in there.

every time i do a gag where a character corrects their own typo i have to code more stupid little bubbles to make it happen but i think it's worth it. all the effort that goes into making tgis look as much like a real chat as possible

this obviously doesnt take place in the canon p5/r universe, but im imagining sort of a postcanon sumi personality where she's more comfortable being herself and isn't borrowing kasumi's brand of confidence, but she's visibly a really anxious person without that kasumi veneer. i also think in this universe sumire is a fairly recent addition to the friend group, and while everyone likes her a lot and she really likes them, i kind of wanted to emphasise that feeling of being in a friend group where everyone's established and you're sort of a plus-one? you don't really fit yet. part of that is her being new, part of it is her anxiety, part of it is just the kind of person sumi is where she's so polite and self-conscious she ends up taking herself out of things with her own good intentions. stuff like her interrupting the flow of an existing conversation by greeting everyone instead of jumping straight in because she doesn't feel comfortable inserting herself, which means everyone else stops to greet her even though that doesn't normally happen in a friend group, or making a point of thanking everyone for being invited to events while the others take it as a given.

idk i love that she feels a bit out of place with the phantom thieves in p5r. and part of that is a natural consequence of being a new addition in royal who can't be naturally integrated with an existing dynamic but i honestly feel like the writing team realised that and acknowledged it, and really leaned into it, and that made it work incredibly well for me. like, it's part of her character that she's sort of an outsider. it's not like p4g's incredibly clumsy integration of marie and subsequent attempt to shove her down everyone's throat as the canon love interest in p4ga (knife). sumi has that outsider vibe on purpose and it makes me really like her dynamic with the thieves as an individual

goro also feels slightly out of place in these chats, but his conversational style blends more naturally with the other thieves at this point and he even uses their codenames sometimes. i keep saying my chatfic series isn't a real Series because the lore keeps changing, but if we accept that they're all kind of following a General Continuity, assume this takes place some time after the last fic in which ren added goro to the groupchat and they made an effort to integrate him into their friend group. he's kind of there now and has settled into being the weird boyfriend. that's his role.

every time goro says something like "ren and i" assume it's the text equivalent of him talking to the group with his arm around ren's waist.

ok i got really fond of this silly running joke where sumi brings up the weather when she's feeling uncomfortable. she's so polite. i like this thread because setting it up meant i got to tie it off like this:

this just made me happy lol i liked writing this. i tried to use it to demonstrate that despite goro's abrasiveness he obviously knows sumire pretty well, he's attuned to her quirks and knows how to tell when she's having a bad time with her anxiety, so he uses her little weather habit to ground her.

i honestly dont think goro and sumire could be considered close in p5r and as much as i like the "royal trio" in canon they're not really... like... friends? with each other? they're both attached to ren, so it' more a V shape than anything else. but that said, i really LIKE goro and sumi's canon dynamic. he takes a really grouchy but politely attentive supervisory role to her during their few forays into the palace as a trio where he doesn't really know her well but clearly identifies her as a harmless little tryhard who needs some guidance and steps into that role grudgingly, and she immediately looks up to him despite being very wrong footed by his ruthlessness, which i find incredibly charming. i think given time they could be good friends, they just didn't get much chance to know each other very well in canon. so i tried to kinda do that here.

once goro stops being evil and joins the group they all kind of tiredly accept that his role is to occasionally push a cup off a bench while smirking and refuse to clean it up. emotionally, i mean.

wait i need to backtrack chronologically to talk about akeshu.

in this scene they're in the same room lol talking and snickering while typing. im trying to get at that vibe of the annoying couple who is flirting with each other, via you. you know? like ostensibly they're talking to you (sumire) but everything they say to you is part of their stupid game. sumi is incidental to goro and ren teasing each other about flirting with someone else, goro is reporting everything ren says because his boyfriend is so eye-rollingly foolish in a cute way. they're very tickled by how amusing and charming they are. gross. disgusting. sumire im so sorry for putting you through this

anyway here are too many of my favourite jokes from the fic

[necrotic-nephilim]

Any ships you don’t like in the batfam fandom that is popular?

OOOH this is such a fun question because I have quite a few

StephCass - i'll be honest this is one of those ships where the fandom ruined it for me. because 2000s StephCass is an elite dynamic, they care for each other so deeply. but the fandom has been intent on defanging and purifying this ship. i don't know *why* but StephCass seems most popular with the anti-Batcest crowd who get very mad if you compare it to ships they deem Batcest. i have an entire meta commentary on this in my drafts I'll likely never post discussing why the only reason StephCass gets the pass for not being Batcest ties directly into misogyny (because the women of the Batfam need to exist as love interests first, not family members so Steph was never going to truly get to exist as a "full" Batfam member so long as she could remain a viable love interest for Tim, and the same can apply to Babs, Helena, and even Cass in some cases) and that just sours me to it. like if i want yuri in Batfam i think there are far more interesting/fucked up ships for Steph like Babs/Steph or Helena/Steph. and when it comes to what i'd actually like to see in canon, i don't want to see Steph relegated to love interest of a Batfamily member, even if it's queer. let her date and exist outside of Gotham the way every other Batfam member gets to, DC *please*.

Bruce/Selina - i can't fully articulate why this ship isn't my thing, it just isn't. i think i just can't conceivably agree with Selina letting go of so many of her fundamental morals and beliefs for the sake of a man, even one she loves such as Bruce. ironically, i think that's one of the few things Gotham War got right about these two. the only canon love interest i like for Bruce is Zatanna and i mourn we'll never get much of that.

JayRoy - i will admit when i was newer to DC the first comics i picked up for Jason were all New-52 and i shipped this. but now that i'm a pre-Flashpoint truther and i've actually read well-written Roy Harper comics, i only see the flaws in this ship. ngl if ppl were actually fun and interesting with it, playing with the idea of Roy knowing Jason as Robin and still seeing him as just Dick's little brother who's gone a little mental, it *could* be fun. but this Red Hood & the Outlaws (2011) and Red Hood/Arsenal (2015) dynamic *butchers* the fuck out of Roy and strips him of everything interesting. and even as a Batfamily stan, my number one pet peeve is when other DC characters get *butchered* in a Batfamily character's book just for the sake of propping up the Bat as some kind of savior. free Roy Harper from this mans.

Bruce/Oliver - we could be here all day if i listed all the Bruce ships i don't like, but i figure this one has to be included. because oh my god either the people shipping this *really* don't understand Oliver Queen or they just hate his ass because why would you subject Oliver to this man. he can't *stand* Bruce. i really hate the popular BruOliie shipping dynamic of like "oh they were boarding school besties" because if you want that, you *should* like Bruce/Zatanna, not these two. Oliver just always gets butchered in these fics and i won't stand for it.

Tim/Bernard - the ESSAYS i could write on this ship and why i dislike it. the fucking *fear* DC (and most popular media tbh) has with depicting queer relationships as anything other than totally perfect and cute for fear of accusations of homophobia has stripped this ship of *any* real grit. Bernard is a non-character in Tim Drake: Robin, he exists to cheer Tim on and prop him up and just be The Boyfriend. we occasionally get glimpses of an interesting character with really interesting trauma and nothing is *done* with it bc at the end of the day, Tim and Bernard must be perfect and cute. what's fun about Tim is he is the *worst* boyfriend alive. that boy is *ass* at dating. all of his relationships are rich with conflict and yet the moment he dates a guy suddenly all of his flaws vanish? i hate it. i mourn what this could've been if we kept messy Tim Drake and had a Bernard who was actually informed by his trauma. DC please let gays be messy again. also of all of Tim's 90s/00s friends to bring back as a love interest, Bernard Dowd was just a *bizarre* fucking choice. Sebastian Ives was *right* there come on now.

Any Crossover Ship - look if crossovers are your cup of tea i'm happy for you but oh my god if i have to see that little green ghost boy or that ladybug girl in the Batfam one more time i think i may explode. i have a lot of thoughts on *why* i think specifically Danny Phantom and Miraculous Ladybug get crossed over as often as they do with the Batfam, but i don't think anyone wants to year that. my only exception to this is Jason/Bucky Barnes, but it *has* to be comics!Bucky. like. Judd Winick's Jason and Ed Brubaker's Bucky would hatefuck and that i wish to see it. any other crossover ship (especially the Peter Parker ones that seem to be rising in popularity) just do *not* do it for me.

honestly besides that i don't think i dislike many ships. (aside from being super opinionated on Bruce ships, but that's mostly bc ppl will use him to butcher the character they ship him with) there are some ships i'm neutral to because i simply do not know enough to have an opinion (like Dick/Wally). i guess the only Batcest ship i'm not particular to is Bruce/Damian, but I wouldn't say that one is popular nor would i say i dislike it, just that it's not my cup of tea. most Batcest ships click for me in one way or another because i like their Weird dnyamics. i guess i could also say i dislike most ships that have come out of Young Justice (tv) because. oh my *god* why were those group of characters put together on a team. it's baffling. but even then it's not disliking those ships, it's moreso disliking that show's depiction of those characters so. everything is really dependant on the canon context for me!

[bereft-of-frogs]

I also don't know what to do with the Collider interview

I definitely get relating to that but I just...I don't get why this character and this context and why in the same interview she admits they were aiming for horror movie villain for that episode?

docile???? I really don't get it

cool....victim blaming a scared teenager for being vulnerable to a power he'd never encountered and not being able to resist getting his mind invaded I guess? because of his 'lack of strength'? but power of (romantic) love saves the day. I feel weird about this.

I'm so sorry I do NOT get this relationship and I'm hoping with a little distance I can make it a narrative that works for me because I really liked a lot of this show it's just getting undercut for me by how much I do not get this romance.

F- reading comprehension on the part of the interviewer because that's factually not what's said in the scene. Vernestra says, "We don't control the Force," they are demonstrably a religion and she does not argue him on that point at all, even though she probably should have. The interviewer says they watched it THREE times and apparently did not pick that up???

???? earned ????????? by doing what??? also confirmed it was supposed to be triumphant I don't get it

While I think with some distance I'll definitely rewatch because I liked a lot of it, and even that final episode and the duel...but I probably won't be watching a second season. Would love more of a bridge between the books and show for Vernestra, but like I said before I'd only really trust Justina Ireland and Tessa Gratton with that story, so I think I'm tapping out of the official narrative here, hope the remaining final three books stick the landing a bit better...

[boxwinebaddie]

uncle neen!!! welcome back omg i was so sad to see u disappear </3 hyh !!! i had a question i asked last time but i was wondering since ur rewriting ur fics, are u planning on posting them on tumblr? or on ao3? pls be kind to urself too<33

good MORNING, lovie!!!!~ <3 c':

( or whatever time it is, where you are at the moment! )

i'm very excited to announce that you are my very FIRST new ask message on my brand new blog!

( teri is my first follower; ly ter. <33 o//3//o )

***long overdue UN ramble-bramble under the cut. xx

i /do/ miss my six hundred bajillion ask memes and am mourning the loss of all my online creations and great joys as a deranged southpark fanfiction author and the legacy i built with my tiny, gay weird hands

( i will go into it another time, but i had a very, very frightening bipolar episode surrounding my blog and my role on here as a writer, friend and mentor to you all, deleted all my things in a horrible panic, was able to recover them...but in the -- what i hope is the *very last* -- after shock of my episode...i got very scared, very sad and deleted both my dearly treasured and beloved, beautifully cult followed by many of you and other ghosts of sp style fanatics past ao3 account**

**( with peppermint on it at 13k likes which...oh my god, please be gentle with me, that was a very, very hard blow and rough realization for me and i am sorry to everyone who loved that fanfiction and wanted to go back and read it for posperity and personal comfort...i miss her too; rest in peace, pep, my first born. my sweet girl. </3 )

...and most tragically of all, i deleted my tumblr blog, with over one hundred pages of carefully curated content surrounding my sp aus, your lovely, insightful and thoughtful questions and inquiries, also typed with your tiny, weird gay hands answered, in turn, with mine, torched the ev. of those memories in the final blast and lost my window into your world through that medium...

...which is literally heartbreaking to me, because more than even my silly fanfictions or my blog, what i loved to do, was talk to all of you and read your wonderful messages each day and remind myself of why i should be here and continue to do what i do. </333 :'''c

BUT! my darlings, as ravenstan would say, 'it's always darkest before crimson dawn', for the very first time in several weeks ( which, i fear, and i was, full of fear and horrible self loathing/dread every waking and nightmarish moment ), last night, i cried for a very, very, very, long time, held myself together in the broken places -- told myself and the girl i was that i loved her and i was going to take care of us and be brave -- and broke the fever ( a little off key like jersey kyle, but very lovely nonetheless; love you tone deaf king. x my sboyf. )

today, i woke up this morning and slept...PEACEFULLY and woke up PERFECTLY HAPPY AND RESTED...

AND SMILED. QUITE. WIDE!!!!~ :D

and that is a baby step, but it is a step in the right direction and also almost wanted to make me weep like a baby again because i literally have not felt happy or like i do not hate myself for like, i shit you not, over like 15-20 days...it was frightening and fucking horrible! SLAY!

nevertheless ( or the most, finally ) i am excited to welcome in a new era/year of change on my blog and within myself; which is an era of peppermint flavored 'hope i'm healing' in a delicious rem(ember) font.

unfortunately, because i nuked my ao3 account, i do not currently one atm, but am in the process of recovering it.

( i'm not condoning any kind of rude/uncivilized behavior bc people are allowed to do anything they want -- but i'd really like to get my user back and would appreciate it a lot if no one used it to create another ao3 account just because it would be confusing for my readers and disheartening to me to not be boxwinebaddie anymore. )

until then, i will be writing/drafting rem(ember) in my messy google docs, am storyboarding everything to the best of my ability ( which is not perfect, but nothing is -- except stan and kyle to each other -- but god loves a trier, which is why he hates me: i prefer hell where it's drier -- that way my girlfail guylinea will not run. xx )

KALE SEITAN! ;)

posting little snippets of it on here for all of you, probably put it here on my tumblr and post it up to ao3 if i can regain my account/one in general ( i am a little worried that because of how long it's been, the loss of all my followers and, what i assume, is a decreased public or tiktok generated interest in sp, it will do poorly; rip </3 )

-- but the point is...that i want to start doing stuff for myself now. and not because i think i should or create unnecessary stress/sadness surrounding my strength or weakness as a writer or person ( or like, beat the living shit out of myself every single day anymore )...

...so i am writing it slowly, carefully, synthesizing all the info i gathered from over a year of answering your questions ( which helped me develop my sp au styles and their worlds into the lovely, seemingly breathing paper machslayed things they are now ), am going to write the fanfiction i always/wanted/ to write ( i’ve always wanted to rewrite RM, but was so busy and overwhelmed with my blog/my irl stuff that i couldn't )

and i'm calling it...

<3

p.s. ( i love you ): i am going to give my grandmother a copy of the first chapter of peppermint for christmas because i wanted to do something special/sentimental for her and secretly push the gay middle school style agenda ( she is actually very woke and thought my uncle might be gay for a while when he was younger, haha xx ), but i want to give them different names, so that on the off chance it gets passed off to my mom, my dad or manages to travel by world of mouth ( my grandma has a tendency to gab, but i love her a lot ) that it can't specifically be traced back to my dead ao3 or my blog.

so if any one has any ideas for silly interesting names i could give my sons, names for other characters or south park in gen. hit me up! <33

thank you for your interest in my work -- and in me, in general. i love you all dearly, i hope you heal ( i know you will ) and smile, pendejos because got a lot coming up on that crimson dawn and a lot of crazy shit coming down on that *jersey i won't say i'm in luh megara vc*

~SCHARLET sLUt~

cheers! mazel! ;) xx

-uncle nina, in her healing era <3