#sorry for the rant probably gonna delete this

[jellyshark-jester]

I’m so sad

When I was younger and look Thai and is literally a walking roast chicken I used to draw myself wHITE and now that I don’t go outside like ever aside from work and idk hangouts witch is like once a week I am pastier than my wHITE friends but i just wanna draw myself tan cuz I was fucking tan but no I’m out here Casper, the fucking ghost, literally out whiting my white friends.

My point is that I wanna draw my self inserts tan but because I’m not it feels weird cuz I did that with my HI3 oc :/

[numberonepartyboy]

'kai raised nya alone' is such bs. oh yeah those other village people wouldn't fucking help two babies who's parents are missing. they totally wouldn't provide them food and help them to get enrolled in school or help with their home.

(( i do hc that kai and nya grew up very fast, being too mature for their age and having no close friends with others bc of their more adult behavior. both of them are school dropouts (kai dropped out in middle school and nya in highschool.) ))

[proshipconfessions]

Responding to your last post about proshippers complaining about other proshippers. You didn't provide this option, but I really think it should depend on the content of the ask... And yes, this is a confession blog for proshippers/profic, etc. aligned people. Telling us to go to antiship confession blogs is horrifically stupid and is only going to put us in dangerous positions.

The proship community is not immune from being shitty. There are proshippers who act just like antis. People who think they can change their race and give themselves disabilities are straight up infecting the community as well. There are proshippers who are horrifically ableist against pwOSDDID, schizospec disorders, etc. There are proshippers who straight up use slurs they can not reclaim. There are proshippers who call people the r slur. I especially think proshippers with these disorders (including myself) should have a safe outlet to talk about the toxicity and abuse within our own community without telling us to basically become an anti. Because what the hell???

Of course, I can't read every single anon that you get, but if they are anything along the lines of what I'm talking about here, consider not deleting them. Especially don't tell people to "just become antis" or "just go to antiship confession blogs." That's harmful as fuck.

If anything, these confessions should serve as a reality check that our community isn't perfect. Or serve to remind people that this behavior shouldn't or won't be tolerated in the proship community. Not every self-proclaimed "proshipper" is actually a proshipper, especially if they act abusive, ableist, or harass people like antis do. I will die on this hill.

If you don't want to house confessions about these topics, that's fine. Just say so, and I'll make my own confessional blog where these topics are allowed.

You’re right that there are plenty of people who are proship and also shitty af. It’s something that I’ve both posted plenty of confessions about and have actually even—in case you haven’t been familiar with my blog for a while—made my own post about! It’s like one of just a few posts that I have made speaking directly from my mouth and not a confession. It’s just a post that I wrote about behavior that I hate seeing pop up far too commonly in this community. I literally can’t count how many people I have blocked, which includes not only antis, but also shitty proshippers and pricks who claim to be them while supporting harm caused to others in real life.

You’re also right that you can’t read every anon that I get. I would have much preferred that you even just ask what kind of thing I’m talking about instead of acting like you’re some secret second mod and I’m just some asshole who refuses to hold anyone or any behavior accountable as long as I agree with them on some level.

I really do wonder what you would think about one of the (many with a similar tone) asks that inspired this post.

Do you know how many anons I get with the same fucking attitude and the same fucking insistence that they’re right and I’m wrong and evil, and yet I’m somehow the perfect mouthpiece for their beliefs? What reality check is this supposed to be giving me? Please either stop assuming that everything I say is in bad faith or genuinely try to explain to me what the good content for my followers is in this ask. This is the behavior that I mocked in my post. I also have an old one that I think is somewhere in my drafts(?) where the evil behavior that they’ve seen among a bunch of proshippers that has made them hate all proshippers is venting about harassment from antis. The fake post I made mocking them is an amalgamation of those two, but you only get this one since I’m way too tired to go find the other one rn lol. If someone reminds me, I can reblog it with it later.

Also, I really can’t tell where I said in my post that I would tell these people to go to antiship blogs (other than my reference to a comment where I said that if all that people send to my inbox is how much they hate proshippers and basic proship ideology, then they should probably take that to an anti blog) instead of just deleting the ask, like I actually said in the post. The post that was really more of a way to let off some steam while getting some use out of the Tumblr polls that I practically never get to do anything with. Do you think that the person in those screenshots that I put above is more at home here than they’d be sending this to some anti’s blog?

But like to try to put myself in your shoes, you could’ve been having a shitty day when you sent this, you could be young, or hell, you could’ve seen someone say something similar to my statement recently while meaning this shitty completely different thing. Or maybe you’ve never seen my blog in your life and have no clue what kind of stuff I do/don’t post. My response might sound super defensive, and I hope that it doesn’t, and that I’m not jumping to conclusions, too. I’d hate to blow this out of proportion over what could easily be just a misunderstanding. If I’m being too harsh, sorry. I aim any coldness towards all of these bigoted ideas and the idea that I hold them, and not at you as a person, as I’m willing to believe that you’re an entirely rational person who just misunderstood me and lashed out at me bc of it. But if there is a next time, please try to give me the benefit of the doubt. I don’t ever intend to do anything harmful, and what I said wasn’t intended to imply anything like what you’re saying here at all. I’m not talking about proshippers venting. I’m talking about actual antis coming into my inbox with the “I’m like TECHNICALLY a proshipper, I guess, but I just despise proshippers and think that people who engage with certain types of fiction are inherently bad!!!” So unless you’re one of these people coming into my inbox, then I am NOT telling YOU to go to antiship confession blogs. And if you are… well, then you’re probably not gonna see this, since I’m going through and blocking all of these dickheads soon.

[button-drop]

Mini Rant

Maybe a hot take? Idk how other people feel about it but I absolutely despise those skits online where people act like the ‘pick me’s or the ‘weird kid’s in high school, or work, or wherever. I absolutely hate all of it, but especially in the context of high school.

At the end of the day, the kinds of behaviors being made fun of are almost always the result of insecurity and self loathing, or someone just trying to live their best life. And as annoying as it can be, I can’t see any good in making fun of a hormonally imbalanced teenager trying their best to fit into a world that tells them they aren’t enough when they’re not putting on a show.

And that’s not even mentioning the millions of other teenagers who have access to the internet, who see these videos and see themselves. They might not be anything like the caricatures being displayed, but the idea that they might be perceived like that is terrifying.

I understand that these videos don’t call out anyone specific, and are just generalizations, and public criticism is one of the most powerful tools of free speech. It’s just that when that’s used to make fun of and is targeted towards insecure teenagers, I can’t see any good coming out of it, especially when the internet has such a wide scope.

TLDR: Don’t make fun of high schoolers, they’re insecure enough

[pkmn-smashorpass]

Respect to those making clear that the baby pokemon aren't actual babies, but even as someone who's been assuming that all of these pokemon pass the harkness test, I still don't want to fuck anything that looks like a baby. I'm not trying to claim any moral superiority, but the looking like a baby part is still a deal breaker here

Completely valid

[tantei-armin]

Man, it's so sad (and kinda pathetic, sorry), that so many of the bad reviews for Trigun Stampede on MAL, are basically "it's different from the OG yadda yadda".

Why is it so hard for people to separate both shows? I mean, Im ok with people not liking Stampede, or not liking the new designs or missing Millie, but if your only argument to shit on the show is because you are a nostalgia baby that cant deal with change, then Im sorry, but I consider your opinion invalid.

Don't like stampede, then just go rewatch the OG anime. At least be real and admit that the OG had its faults too (have u seen the static fight scenes?), but dont come at me saying Im stupid for enjoying Stampede and claiming the OG anime was "perfect".

Dont like the show? Dont watch it. I didnt like the OG anime, but you dont see me going around calling it trash or insulting people who enjoyed the show. I like Stampede's designs more, I like the darker tone of the show and I find Orange's CG style stunning. But I understand why people enjoy the OG too even if I didnt, its just a matter of personal preferences.

So really guys. If you dont like Stampede, thats fine, no one is forcing you to watch it. But let the people who do enjoy it have their fun and bebhappy instead of going around trashing the show and insulting people.

[ganondoodle]

something thats been driving me crazy is the constant worry that i am somehow using harmful stereotypes for the characters i write

like i am unfortunately white tm and me also being autistic and queer does not erase that obviously, im always trying to educate myself as best as i can, yet i feel like im always doing something wrong

its less of a problem when im working with the normal forms of hylia and demise since they are not really human, and though their humanoid disguises technically are still not human they do represent what they might have looked like if they grew up as one; i didnt want to make demises form too dark since i felt like it would perpetuate that stereotype of dark skin = evil which is already not great about ganondorfs character design, but didnt want to make him too light since i felt it would erase that part of his connection to ganondorf altogether and make it all the worse, but then again my demise isnt actually that evil, hes good at heart, so making him too light then would be even worse bc it would imply that light = good thing again

for hylia im even more anxious about it bc i intentionally gave her very dark skin to kinda subvert that light = good thing with zelda (tho in my AU the gods are not good and hylia isnt actually as loyal to them as it may seem bc she knows that.. which i feel complicates things just further; and also light an dark is just a very good contrast aesthetically?) but then i also like to intentionally make characters rather ?gender? but then i worry her being somewhat masculine would also be sth harmful bc i know black women are often treated as inherently less feminine .. which isnt my intention at all (tho my hylia .. doesnt rly have a gender? idk many characters i like to write/design dont have anything specific, like what more do you need than knwoing the right pronouns to call them?? qnq) her being rather cold and ruthless also feels like im doing something bad somehow

then theres the whole sexualization worry, i dont know if im doing that in a bad way bc honestly i just like .. drawing ...bodies? aesthetically? like yes they are very sexy but also wheres the line, am i somehow overstepping it without knowing?? how can i recognize what is normal 'finding certain things pretty or sexy' and what isnt??

so far i dont remeber anyone pointing anythign out as bad which im taking as a sign that i cant be doing that badly .. hopefully, maybe all this is a very stupid thing to worry about and its obvious to everyone else but i am so god damn afraid of doing something even slightly questionable and being hunted down for it (probably bc similar happened to me when i was a teen and it was about an absolut non issue, literally, so even the thought of doing something actually bad is mind boggling to me bc that other thing nearly cost me my life and i literally dont know how i survived and i would 100% not if it happened again..)

this is probably a very chronically online thing too but hoenstly i needed to get it out of my head for once

[itslottiehere]

—

[diagonal-queen]

i really am like...the worst, huh? like i sometimes get sad that people hate me but i also get it cus same girlie me too! like fuck me!! i suck!! every time i think about myself, my identity or character or whatever, i'm always so wowed by how much i fucking suck!! i'm not even doing anything with my life- i'm not making any kind of impact or helping anybody. i'm doing the opposite, in fact. i'm also just...a really terrible friend, and i think about that every single time i talk to anybody i care about. it makes me feel so sad. i am just the worst!!

[that-angry-noldo]

we have a saying in ukrainian, "горить сарай - гори і хата", which basically translates to "if the stalls are burning, let the house burn too", and if it doesn't describe my attitude towards school perfectly.

[backslashdelta]

.

[tinytveit]

im normal

i like my text messages where im telling someone why im upset, getting ignored. very cool. i reach my limit and then shes like oh why are you mad what why yelling . and then ignores the reasoning!!!!!!!!!

im expecting a ‘you just dont want me to have friends’ which is the go to when i express very normal feelings

i dont care if she has friends, great if so. if she wants to yap to said friend, thats cool. what i want, reasonably, is said friend to Not be Here for 12 hours a day. knocking at the door at 12pm, when my mother is not even out of bed. just to yap. phones exist. why is she here 5+ hours a day, almost every day. i personally would Love to walk around my house, through the living room and not choke to death bc the two of them are chain smoking cigs with the doors and windows closed. nothing fucking happened between the hour she left our house to midday the next morning for her to be around every day. phone calls, exist.

im really trying to not be snarky because genuinely i dont want this to seem like im joke mad or overreacting because its seriously fucking annoying.

absolutely will get confronted later because i did yell, and she was in the room uh, and i can only Imagine the guilt tripping i will receive, but i just want boundaries man.

we might as well ask for rent at this point

[drrobobitch]

Sometimes I feel like I’m actually going to blow my brains out because I’m literally so done with everything (again suprise suprise)

I literally work so hard and get nothing in return.

If I see someone complaining about getting less than 100 notes I may crash tf out like actually I may hurt someone 💀💀😭

I CANT DO THIS SHIT ANYMORE I LITERALLY WORKED ON A FIC FOR LIKE WEEKS AND GOT NOTHING I DONT GET IT I JUST WANT SOMEONE TO BE AT LEAST A LITTLE IMPRESSED WITH THE WORK I PUT IN BECAUSE I ONLY HAVE ONE PERSON WHO WILL ACTUALLY TELL ME AND THE OTHERS JUST LOOK AT ME FUNNY OR LIE STRAIGHT TO MY FACE I WANT TO KILL MYSELF I DONT UNDERSTAND I WORKED SO HARD AND GOT NOTHING AT ALL LIKE WHAT

IM SICK OF LYING TO MYSELF I FUCKING LOVE VALIDATION I NEED IT I NEED SOMEONE TO TELL ME WHY THE HELL I DESERVE TO EVEN BREATHE WHEN I GET UP I DONT GET IT I CANT MAKE IT STOP EVEN IF I TRY I JUST CANT IT WONT

I work my ass off for nothing. I just want people to talk to about the things I like and enjoy I’ve never gotten that before and idk how to talk to people I don’t get it I’m doing all this to impress you because if you like my work = you like me I need everyone to like me I NEED EVERYONE TO FUCKING LIKE ME

[liesmultixxx]

.

[mrsdickey]

shitty sketch and a yap sesh

feel free to skip. i usually dont rant abt things, but when i do, i get kind of uppity about it. it is long, i just wanna get my feelings out yk. im probably gonna b taking a small break, as a result of my uncomfort on the internet right now and i just. dont know what to draw lol.

ok cracks knuckles loudly ahemmmm

im feeling uncomfortable,

sorry if i seem irrational in this. i just want to be heard.

i dont really know how to word this properly, but sometimes i feel like the love for these characters is a fucking competition.

i hate the idea that people will be like "**I** am bill/pete/jerry/josh's #1 fan!!!!!! nobody else!!!!" im sorry, it just pushes me away from the fandom. and to see people worrying about having to be shit on for having female OC's in the club really pisses me off. gatekeeping isn't it.

i know every fandom is like this. its annoying as hell and i know better to just not post my feelings like this, and to just ignore them, but it makes me hellllllla uncomfortable. it makes me wanna hide.

im genuinely so attached to bill that it's really fucking with me. he's my main comfort, as ridiculous as it sounds. im very mentally ill and lonely, and bill is kind of my "escape" from my stressful life. sometimes it makes me cry, to see myself implode like the fucking titan sub all for a goddamn fictional character. all i think about is him, it's like a fucking parasite eating at my already fucking rotten brain. work? bill. home? bill. hanging with my family? bill. literally everything else? bill. and seeing people wanting to assert themselves as the MAIN fan of that character just gives me the fucking ick. as much as i looooove bill to the point of literal crying fits, im never gonna call myself his biggest fan. (sometimes i call myself his fave but that's more of an in-universe headcanon thing rather than a "he loves ME more!!" thing shhhhb)

anyways, i dont want the love and appreciation for these characters to be a competition. but i have the feeling that it is. and it makes me really sad. this isn't what dorkin wanted.

i know i always stress "no doubles" when it comes to my selfshipping with bill. and i still do...but its kinda ridiculous to assert yourself as THEE #1 fan of a character, and then shoving it into peoples' faces. it feels gross.

i hate hate hate hate hateeee posting about this kind of shit, i wanna keep my account positive, but i genuinely feel like i needed to air out my negative feelings for once in my fucking life.

i am sorry if this is problematic and aggressive. i have strong feelings about these sorts of things. i know none of this matters in real life to some people. but in my boring, lonely ass life, it does matter to me. a whole fucking lot.

i really, REALLY love the eltingville club. but sometimes i feel like its own fandom is what it's criticizing. that's not to say **everyone** in this fandom is like this, i KNOW not all of us are like this. and i really appreciate the people calling this shit out.

with that, i hope i can still continue to post about the eltingville club and not worry about being unworthy.

and to my small circle regulars, who like even my yumeship posts, thank you. i really appreciate you guys. and im sorry if i dont interact with you guys as much as i should.

anyways erm!! i might delete this, but for now, im probably gonna hide for a bit gaahaha you can find me on discord sob

""i aint reading allat sorry that happened or congratulations"" headass lmao

[callmecammie]

Not a horny post but a rant ab something im so mad at I wanna delete the app

This shit is getting toxic

90% of findoms are the LAZIEST and most cringe on this app. They just expect money for no reason. Like damn, how dumb and lazy do you gotta be? I have to send you money just because you’re unreasonably hot and I get nothing out of it? I also have in my bio I don’t do tributes?? I think the other 10% of findoms on this app will agree with this next statement: If you’re a sex worker, or you sell nudes, or content, whatever your deal is. You still treat your people like they’re idk, fucking people?!? And you give them what they paid for(tasks, nudes, sessions,etc) and that’s respectable. I’ve had some decent interactions with findoms, where they’re like “hey, how are you? I’m a findom by the way” and then I’m like “ah that’s not my thing sorry” and then we both go on about our day. But these findoms that are just raging cunts make me wanna delete this fucking app so bad. I’ve met so many cool people on this app and have found some fun people to play with but this shit is getting toxic. I get at least 1 a day with that shitty fucking attitude and this morning I woke up to 4 of them. And btw, if you’ve felt like you’ve been attacked in this message, then I probably called your ass out and you’re part of the 90% of findom that gives not just legitimate findom, but also femdom in general a bad name. Stop being so fucking toxic Jesus fuck. I’m a nice guy, I love talking to people, and I am submissive, but do not go past my boundaries or I’m really gonna hurt your feelings.