#sorry for my soap box

[paperclipninja]

I'm gonna sound very old person yells at cloud but I don't care, I feel like I need to say this. We all (well most of us) know that messaging Neil with any headcanons/theories/wishes/hopes/dreams to do with the show is a no-go because it could potentially compromise the story he wants to tell or ends up telling. And yes, he is a grown up who chooses what to respond to etc and I think it's wonderful he engages with fans and answers a lot of lovely and interesting questions about his process, writing and journey etc.

However, there is another reason not to send theories and ideas about how the show should go to the show creator in the hope of a response: it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter whether a theory is correct, or a speculation may or may not play out. That is why fandom exists.

Online fandom is where we all come together to yell and cry and throw around weird-ass ideas and theories and look at art and read fanfic and unite in our love of characters and a show. A huge part of being in fandom, is the way fandom theories become like an understood little bit of fanon lore that some people attach to, others disregard. But it doesn't matter. And part of the fun of fandom, is when a new season or a new episode of the show comes out, you have this collective catalogue of ideas and theories and headcanons and you get to yell and scream, "omg it happened1" or "lol that that thing was ever talked about" or "thank god that theory didn't come to pass".

Wanting to know now (not that we ever will) and not wanting to wait until the next season to find out the answers diminishes the fandom experience. I cannot stress enough how much we are in the absolute peak of the fandom experience right now. The between seasons time is the ultimate time to be a part of a fandom (as I'm sure many people are well aware), knowing there's another season coming energises everyone to create and connect and speculate and it's glorious! I know it feels like it'll be like this forever, but it won't. Next season is the last and yes, there will be a flurry and uptick of all the energy and excitement once again, and I absolutely believe Good Omens fandom will live on and remain active and thrumming. But there won't be theories and what ifs and hunting for clues for the next season, and over time it will dwindle a little and plateau and some people will fall into other fandoms, and while it will probably bubble away, there won't be the anticipation that sits with us now.

My point is, fandom is where we get to throw around ideas and flail and be ridiculous and also serious sometimes, but it's all for us. For the fans. Showing Neil theories or getting in a flap about a particular speculation and asking if x, y, or z might happen isn't just about putting the creator in an awkward spot, it takes away what fandom is about. Just let this time be ours. If you haven't been in fandom before, enjoy it! Don't be in a hurry to seek definitive answers or know things either way.

It doesn't matter if any or none or all of the things that float around end up being correct or incorrect. Fandom isn't about being right. It's about being a part of a community and being able to share ideas and it's about it being FUN.

So TL;DR Stop sending Neil fan ideas because that is for fandom, not for the creator.

[hausofmamadas]

ngl, I normally side eye tf out of personality tests esp MBTI ㋛ bc there’s massive body of evidence revealing PTs are ethnocentrically biased, ineffective at doing what they’re designed to do, and p much a dystopian way of measuring someone’s value based on traditional standards of capitalist productivity much like IQ tests, thereby marginalizing people who already face marginalization like ppl who are socioeconomically disadvantaged, non-white, without a standard education, and ppl with diff mental health profiles and/or neurodivergence ㋛

HOWMEVER I’m powerless to resist a tag game from my dearest of dfs, @drabbles-mc. Plus this is cute and uncharacteristically on the money, like # of times I’ve prob said, ‘might be wrong tho’ this week alone. And yea, the irony not lost on me, ‘walking encyclopedia’ n I just pulled that☝️shit

No pressure tags: @narcolini @ashlingiswriting @cositapreciosa @rerorero-my-cherry @ladygoatee @purplesong1028 @salt-is-a-terrible-currency @slowthunders @when-did-this-become-difficult

TYSM for the tag Ari! @thepetitemandalorian

This is FUN! Take the quiz here!

NP tags: @acrossthesestars @massivecolorspygiant @middimidoris @bellaxgiornata @moongirldreamer @souliebird @loveroftoomanyfandoms @mattmurdocksscars

[atopvisenyashill]

people will be like “elia isn’t central to the narrative it’s crazy she’s so popular” and meanwhile not only is ned stressing out about her murder and what it means for jon snow every three to four business days, but her daughter’s angry black cat is quite literally haunting the red keep and someone claiming to be her son is about to land on westeros. it’s almost like the ghosts of elia and her children are in fact central to the narrative and she’s popular for a reason.

[dustteller]

Honestly, the most shocking part of the plagiarism accusations is not even the plagiarism itself. I knew people plagiarized stuff, even if I didn't know who. The most shocking part is sheer lack of opinions.

I don't understand. You are interested enough by a subject that you read so much material to plagiarize, but for some reason, during this entire process, you do not form A Thought? Not a single one? I have opinions about the shit the people in front of me in the plane are talking about! I can not imagine actively consuming a significant amount of content and not having three times as many opinions!!! What is your brain! Are you a lizard??? What the heck is going on up there?? Do you lack the joy of Pondering and Considering and Creating????? I kinda just thought those were inherent human traits!

[leverage-ot3]

time for the obligatory post about what episodes I want to see in the upcoming leverage season(s)

(for reference, I made this similar post in 2020 after the reboot was announced. I'm pasting some from that post bc I still want them to happen lol)

new ideas:

I mentioned a date night episode in the last post (apollo really did bless me with foresight for the date night job on that one) but for considerment: ot3 date night. possibly their first date night after they all get together. breanna and sophie know it's happening (harry is, like, peripherally aware) and some crime hijinks are going down and the three of them are frantically trying to stop bad things from happening that are going to interfere with the date. I want to see them going through it behind the metaphorical curtain. I want to see breanna fighting for her life trying to out-hack the hacker that is going to ruin their ten-part itineraried date. harry has to get in a fistfight and eliot is so proud about it when he finds out after everything is over

tree law episode. harry has been frothing at the mouth about it since it was made. his life has been moving him towards this penultimate moment. breanna thinks it's HILARIOUS and cheers him on 100% of the way. she is VERY enthusiastic about this con

I'm not going to mention certain things because I've seen jrogers posting on bluesky social and I know he might be already writing some of those plots

con that the food trucks have plot-relevance. like, one of his food truck stations is being harassed /victimized by, like, a local gang or something that takes advantage of food truck/cart workers and the team steps in. the actual (veteran) food truck workers get involved in the con. leverage international might just have gained a few retainer members

quinn should come back for an episode. I know the actor is friends with ckane. they should make it happen because it would be iconic and I said so

on a similar note, ckane is friends with jensen ackles and. guys. wouldn't it- wouldn't it be extremely funny if a flame from eliot's past named sean sylvester who is a rugged drifter with a questionable past

episode where tara or maggie (or BOTH, can you imagine how powerful that would be???) come back and there is slight flirting with sophie possibly??? that or very obvious chemistry from a past tryst. sophie has slept with both of them, I know it in my heart of hearts. bonus points if tara and maggie fall in love (I think it would be funny. maggie's taste in men is canonically atrocious, I think she deserves someone like tara at this point)

I just want a lot of side characters to come back, okay? sue me I miss them

gonna put the rest under the cut since this post has become obscenely long

not episode-specific, but I want more mentions of the korean leverage team. and all the other teams too! we know that in canon there is the south korean one, the nigerian one, and one in london (I think that's it for mentions so far, but correct me if I'm wrong!)

episodes addressing issues with american imperialism and its effects on minorities and marginalized communities, specifically within this country (there aren't a lot of episodes where they are actively out of country)

dear fucking god take a more abolitionist stance on policing I'm begging. would it KILL you to not be weird about cops? pls just punch some more cops. take down white supremacist cops, I'm sure you can scrounge something up bffrrn

women's rights episodes. I know it's kind of recent, but episodes about accessibility of stuff like birth control, abortion access, etc. y'all are capable of making excellent episodes on that I know it

more climate crisis-related episodes. god knows you're feeling it in the deep south

taking down a corrupt megachurch pastor (although lbr, there is no ethical megachurch anything and you can fight me on this)

something to do with ace rights bc I think it would be really cool to see the team advocate for that stuff, especially since breanna is canon ace

helping a polycule that is being victimized by X organization/entity (maybe a housing association or medical or something???). breanna is bombastic side-eyeing the ot3 the entire time. it is making hardison sweat. sophie thinks it's hilarious

taking down 'writers' that use ai and self-publish AND/OR people that take original/fan works off of like ao3 and wattpad and publish them for personal profits without the author's consent. breanna would have a field day with this (god herself could try to convince me that girl does not read/write fanfic and I wouldn't believe it)

episode about underfunded public schools. we saw corrupt private schools in the fairy godparents job but I want an episode that would make abbot elementary writers proud

episode addressing native/indigenous. eliot is from oklahoma, I'm sure he is well aware of the health/job/economic/etc disparities on reservations. I will email jrogers about it myself if I have to- it anyone can get people going about native rights through a tv show it would be leverage.

I sent an ask to wil wheaton once asking if he was open to returning to leverage and I think he said he would be down for it. but chaos either has to be a reluctant ally to leverage international and is being handled by quinn as a hitter OR he is just. in jail. bc he sucks.

bpas and/or pfas episode. breanna has mentioned microplastics before but I want more

the team tears the shit out of conversion therapy camp owners and plants the seeds for legislation that will punish parents that try to send their kids to those hellscapes

while we're at it, I'd love to see an ep where they tackle the trans bathroom issue. god knows the news doesn't talk about it nearly enough

something to do with foster care. they end up starting some sort of foster care network that past clients/allies can take part in. maybe a mentorship program for kids that want to do what they do one day (they are very reluctant to encourage kids to participate in crime BUT if that is the avenue that they are going to inevitably go towards, they guide them in the right direction). nana makes an appearance (*insert 'everybody liked that' meme*)

prison industrial complex episode. I KNOW we had the jailhouse job BUT we really need this in our year of 2024

another episode on corrupt influencers. maybe influencer parents? dear god pls take them down a notch

ep where there is an underlying message that tells you how to avoid becoming victim to scams or something, or like is a tutorial for how to identify scams you might fall victim to (sorry, I just have to say this after two separate people tried to pig butcher me in less than two (2) weeks))

not to say I want them to do an ep calling out cop city, but it would feel really good to watch the leverage team rip that concept to SHREDS

the minimum wage job. need I say more? we deserve the catharsis

pls go after goodwill execs, esp the ones in the pnw that have their sector as for-profit and have become millionaires+ because of it while paying their staff (especially disabled staff) fucking pennies

while we're on the topic, pls call out salvation army (the corporation)

I can probably go on for like five hours so I'll stop here

ep that we get to see harry and his daughter bond :)

job where they get to lower the price of insulin (and other drugs)

actually, you know what? an episode where the crew annihilates big pharma and terrible insurance companies

I think that breanna should be able to go off about mass/over consumption as a treat. I 100% believe she has Thoughts about it. like, she will absolutely call out the corporations that are responsible for these trends, but also she should be allowed to mention our tendency for overconsumption as a society. obviously there are a few corporations that are doing most of the world's pollution/ecological damage, but we should be doing our part too and I KNOW it would be in-character for her to go off on it

I bet she has a LOT to say about influencers, tbh. obviously not all influencers are bad, but there are sooooo many problematic ones and problems within the influencer industry

sizing discrimination in the modeling/clothing industry. let eliot talk about how there are no perfect bodies. also while I'm on the subject, can we PLS have more body-diverse background actors on the show? I know this is nitpicky but I'd really love to see some more people that look like me, even if they are just in the background

a thinly veiled writers' rights episode (I'm looking at you media execs and the stupid amount of time it took for you to comply to the WGA demands)

something to do with media companies making entire movies/tv shows and then fucking cancelling them/not releasing them and using them as tax write-offs. every time it happens it baffles me. that is cartoonishly stupid villain shit. I can't imagine lovingly working on a project for a year plus and then the company just going, nah, we aren't going to release it because you suck and it's a good business move

ai art and ai in general. please. let it BURN

okay now I'm done

ideas from the previous post that I still want:

comicon job. I said it before and I will say it again- we deserve it!!! come on, it's the age of the geek after all!!! (in the last post I also said a ren faire ep, but I will let the card game job count for that)

summer camp ep? I saw a tumblr fic about it and I think it could be cute. it could kinda be like the fairy godparents job- eliot in charge of some type of sports (archery, fencing, etc), hardison would be in charge of arts and crafts (this boy might be a genius with tech and in general tbh, but the show did such a good job of showing that he’s also very talented with the arts- sculpting the statue for the miracle job, forging the old diary in the king george job, etc), parker would LOVE to be in charge of a high ropes course. breanna would totally be down for some sort of nerdy kid robotics or simple, traditional camp games (can't go wrong with the classics. everyone loves making bracelets!) I feel like it's too stereotypical to have sophie have kids put on a play but we all know that's exactly what she would do. idk for harry? I think he has the same traditional camp activities vibe as breanna. he's in it for the nostalgia. OR something to do with videogames

please, please, please, please, please make an episode where they take down a cult, im begging. that would be such a good episode. definitely a mindfuck episode like the experimental job (4x11). I’ve seen a few posts about a job dealing with a cult (here’s one) and I think it would be really interesting 

MORE STERLING being DONE with leverage shenanigans!!! give me feral!sterling like in the frame-up job (5x10)!!! give me sterling that protests every step of the way but conveniently looks away and “whoops, the team just disappeared, I have no idea how that happened!!! diddly dang darn it, they got away again!!! sorry guys!!!” bonus points if mcsweeten is there too and also participates in intervening hijinks

the team takes down a circus that is still using and abusing wild animals!!! because first I’d LOVE to see acrobat!parker swinging up in the air like a pro and being in her element, but also because those places are the fucking worst and need to Go Down. give me eliot having to pose as an animal trainer with deep sympathy for the animals being abused, quietly talking soothing words to them when he thinks no one is around (correction: hardison is, in fact, around, and filming his boyfriend’s softness to save for later). give me charismatic hardison playing the role of ringmaster, running and flaunting about and being passive-aggressive to the circus master. give me eliot freeing the animals from their chains when they are finally able to shut the place down and relocate the animals to sanctuaries (his hands shaking just a little as twists the key in the lock, because he too was once an abused, caged animal in his own right and he knows how liberating it is to finally be free). 

[stupidlittlespirit]

Cutie patootie again 🥺🥺

Lmao I'm sorry I'm always bringing Ford discourse but like !!!!! You're one of the only people online who like sees the bad in every character!! So many fans have been saying how Stanley has never done wrong and fuck Ford but like it's only cause Stanley is a guy who shows very obviously he loves his family and we got 2 whole seasons with the guy

This is probably why I really am hoping Alex gets the go ahead with a sequel! Stan and Ford show to flesh out their relationship more. Like I know Stanford really shows his feelings in the journal but I swear most of people's literacy is fucking dead 😭😭😭 showing will probably be a lot better than telling

I guess I feel really bad for Ford cause he's a victim who isn't uwu I am traumatized. Like there's NOTHING wrong with traumatized people being very teary eyed and soft spoken individuals. Fuck it honestly that's me to a fucking t. But other victims are rude and they do get angry easily. Ford reminds me a lot of Steven from the Haunting of Hill House. They just express their grief and trauma in a much more anger and sarcastic emotional response than others. And like it pretty much confirms in the Book of Bill that Stanford was gonna keep the book a secret also!! He says at first it's to protect his family but later admits it's because he still feels shame in having Bill trick him. In believing all of his lies. He still feels shame for almost causing the apocalypse and letting his pride separate from his brother for 40 years at this point!! Idk idk I'm rambling again but I honestly really love characters like Ford that show that victims don't always act the same but they deserve just as much respect and love all the same. They deserve a second chance and they deserve to be happy. 💜

No it's okay anon! I love having these conversations! I'm sorry it took me so long to answer, I've been really busy.

I have no idea if any of this makes sense but I hope it does because it's taken me like 2 and a half hours to write....

TL;DR - In my opinion, the entire show is about cycles of abuse. Ford and Stan are both imperfect victims for different reasons. They suffered abuse differently. Don't look at and judge them from the place that they start at: Do it from where they end up.

TW: Abuse, suicide, discussion of personal irl abuse.

All below the cut:

You're right about us having more information to work with with Stan v. Ford, but I also think people have a tendency to put Stan on a pedestal because he is, ultimately, the more relatable twin. Not many people are on Ford's wavelength in the sense of intelligence (I'm certainly not) and I would venture to say not many people fell through a portal and spent 30 thirty years in different dimensions running from/trying to defeat their arch enemy....

Alongside that, the twins experienced abuse and reacted to it very differently, and it can be hard to examine those differences fairly, and to see why both types are as bad as the other, especially because one is more obvious and likeable than the other.

They remind me a LOT of my familial situation in interchangeable ways.

My life ran parallel to Stan's for a long time (ironically enough Gravity Falls came out when I'd just been kicked out of home) and I had a sibling who was the 'golden child' for my family. I was the screw up black sheep and they were the one with potential.

That designation is neither mine nor my sibling's fault. It's the fault of my family for putting those labels on two kids who really had no chance, right from the day we were born, but who were forced to adopt them regardless. I think Stan and Ford are the same.

Where I suffered more direct abuse (physical, psychological etc) because I was reactive and was left in the firing line as the scapegoat (Stan), my sibling was held close by my parents and 'protected' because they were seen as well behaved and offered my parents what they wanted: Someone to control and push for success (Ford). They were still abusing my sibling, just in a different way.

I spiralled and went on to live a life where I was only ever in danger and at risk. I made my peace very early on in life (I think maybe before I was about 10?) that the people who were supposed to love me unconditionally, couldn't stand me, valued me as lesser than my sibling, and didn't want me. But I wanted to Be Somebody and prove my value and worth to everyone else to make up for that, which meant I fell into the wrong hands and did all I could to try and be that ideal for others in the hopes they wouldn't see me as my parents did.

I separated from my family early and went off alone, despite really always being alone, and was 'okay' with that (spoiler, I was not!). I also suffered abuse in the way Ford did and my sibling in the way Stan did to varying degrees too. We're all rarely aligned with one specific character because abuse is, unfortunately, incredible versatile.

My sibling, however, stayed with my mother (our whole family abused us, but I'll stick with parents now because it's most relevant. Our parents divorced when we were young and my dad was our 'primary abuser', but only because he was more blatant with it) and my sibling went to an excellent school because my family saw their potential and submissiveness as an opportunity. A meal ticket.

Their career and life was facilitated because I suppose my family also wanted them to 'make up for me' and get the kid they'd always wanted out of my sibling, which is a lot of pressure to put on a child. They went on to be successful (still are, I'm very proud of them) whereas I couldn't/can't keep a stable job and turned to sex work to survive (there is nothing wrong with sex work blah blah but being forced into it at a young age does have negative consequences, no matter what anyone says).

My sibling was emotionally and psychologically manipulated but also treated in a way that could be misconstrued as being loved. I would think that for them, that was hard to understand that that wasn't truly the case. I think Ford was the same in that respect, especially when he craves acceptance so much.

Those are both types of abuse but in different ways. My sibling lives with the guilt and shame of being 'the one who didn't get it as bad', and can't quite accept that they were never really loved (which is embarrassing to admit and I think/hope they will come to terms with that one for their own sake), and I live with the childish resentment of them being 'the one my parents never wanted' and with the absolute hatred of how unfairly I was treated by people who were supposed to love me unconditionally.

You can see where this is going, right?

Stan and Ford suffered equally in that same way, all throughout their lives in varying ways, and in my other response to you we talked more in depth about how Ford specifically was manipulated his entire life. I think Ford was made to be responsible at a young age and forced to carry this weight on his shoulders, and then as an adult had that insecurity worsened and coaxed by Bill.

Stan deep down knew his father hated him, and despite still wanting his love, eventually knew he wasn't going to get it. I mean, no one even came to his fake funeral for god's sake. Image how that must feel?

Stan grew to spot the signs of abuse and avoid it to the best of his ability. He was still vulnerable of course, but he was more street smart and clued up after a while. He didn't fall for Bill's flattery because he looked at Bill and saw his father. He recognised abuse.

Me and my sibling are the same.

Now, because of the differences in our abuse, my sibling and I turned out to be very different people. They still interact with my family (although they don't enjoy it but do so out of a sense of guilt and duty, and that they have to take care of them). I have nothing to do with any of them because fuck 'em.

I'm very emotional and can be unstable or rude (I have BPD), but love deeply and am sometimes overtly considerate of other people's feelings to my detriment because no cared about mine. I struggle with needing to be loved and being a chameleon who adapts their personality to those around them in order to be most liked and maximise that. I don't have a real identity, just the one I craft in the moment. I even worked/work in sales because having that ability makes it easy to pick up on people's emotional state and manipulate it, for better or worse. I have also done bad things and been cruel to others, I've also had an inflated ego and sometimes still do. I'm the Stan, for the most part, but I've experienced Bill-like abuse too and been the Ford.

My sibling can be spiteful and often acts like the things that happened me didn't actually happen the way I think they did and they minimise my feelings. They struggle to apologise and also behave in a way that is similar to my abusers, but I don't believe they do that maliciously. I think they don't know any better and haven't had the space to mature and come to terms with that. They have a bit of an ego, too. They're the Ford, mostly.

(This isn't to say I'm none of those things, because I can be and my sibling can be all the things I am at times)

I have to remember that they're still in contact with our abusers and were heavily manipulated against me growing up. They still get the Wormtongue treatment, as we said about Ford. They're still affected. They are also the only person I still see because we're in this together and they genuinely love me (as I do them). They're funny and cool and they love as deeply as I do.

My sibling and I, and Stan and Ford, were both raised in the same barn and we're from the same stock; of course we have the traits of our parents. It would be impossible not to. My sibling and I just learn to smother those parts as best we can as we mature and the process of doing so never really ends. I would say I'm a little better at it than my sibling is, but I'm also older and realised my abuse far sooner than they did. I've had longer to come to terms with it, like Stan did.

Stan was aware of his father's abuse much earlier and although I think he struggled to accept it, he eventually realised much sooner than his brother that he was being abused.

Ford wasn't able to mature because he was so busy working and then surviving. He eventually was forced to come to terms with his abuse by both Bill and by others, and it must have sucked to have that realisation so late in life. I have another family member that that exact thing happened to, and the shame we all feel at being taken advantage like that is immense. That's why post-portal Ford is so different in my mind. It breaks or makes you and it is very embarrassing to accept.

But both of them exacted their resentment and sadness and insecurities out on others: Stan literally scammed people out of their money because he wanted to be rich and committed other crimes That's a really bad thing to do!

Yes, Ford was manipulative and tough on others because he'd been taught to be, and I think he truly believed in his youth that he "turned out fine!" (a favourite one-liner of mine from people who are in denial about their abuse) because he couldn't accept it.

It was wrong of both of them to do the things they did, and there is no excuse for it, but we can understand where that behaviour came from if we examine them both fairly.

What matters is that eventually both Stan and Ford matured into people who recognised why they were in the wrong. They stopped that cycle of abuse by finding love and forgiving one another, and by finding their their family.

Stan and Ford were able to redeem themselves. They both have a plethora of faults but an absolute encyclopedia of positives, too. It just took them a long time to unlearn and they have to continue to unlearn those until they die.

All victims are imperfect victims because there's no such thing as a perfect one. Victims carry shame, victims can be aggressive, victims can repeat the mistakes of their abusers no matter how much they think they don't. Maybe they don't respond to their trauma 'the way that they should' (which is bullshit, by the way. There is no right or wrong way to be a victim).

When I suffered (a different, non family related) major trauma, I wasn't believed (by that same friend I talked about in the other ask) because I hadn't, in their opinion, reacted in the way I supposed to react. I wasn't sad enough or traumatised enough, when in actual fact I was all of those things but was too ashamed and afraid to show it to others until it got so bad that I couldn't hold it in anymore. I protected myself through jokes and being blasé about it.

Ford is a great example of a more obvious imperfect victim. He is a product of his environment and he protects his vulnerabilities with egoism. The most egotistical of us are the most insecure.

Stan is also an imperfect victim, just more obviously so. He was portrayed from the start as likeable and funny, but he is the same as his brother.

Initially Stan was as cantankerous and mean as he was silly, remember. But he changed over time. We get to see the toll his abuse took on him because he learned to come to terms with that shame and told the audience about it through his actions and behaviours. We actually saw his backstory in detail and saw how he learned to love the kids. We saw his vulnerability whereas Ford refuses to and struggles to lower that guard and show his soft spots.

Ford is portrayed in a very specific light that I think does him an injustice at times and contributes to the misunderstanding of his personality.

Ford's vulnerability is hard for him to reveal (to those around him and the audience) because he couldn't afford to be vulnerable during his time in the portal or with Bill. Vulnerability kills when you're not showing it to the right people and when he did show his vulnerable side to Bill (he didn't have the answers he thought he was so capable of having and had to swallow that bitter pill and ask for help), he was betrayed and hurt really awfully.

Ford then went on the exact same journey Stan did when Stan was kicked out of home, except Ford was 30 plus and in an interdimensional nightmare instead of the USA. They both suffered. (And also, the US might as well have been a different dimension for Stan at his young age because it was just a foreign to him as space was to Ford. Earth is cruel no matter where you are).

Anyway.... All of that is to say, nobody comes out of abuse clean.

Some of us become unlikeable and unfriendly, and sometimes even abusive ourselves. A lot of us learn to survive in any way we can and sometimes that is at the detriment of others.

But what really matters is how we unlearn those behaviours and how we grow.

Don't look at and judge Ford or Stan from the place that they start: Do it from where they end up.

I'd also like to add that just because you might be a dick, it doesn't mean you deserve to be abused and I see a lot of people say that Ford deserved what he got, and that pisses me off so fucking badly.

Again: disclaimer these are just my own feelings do not come for me thank u

[sequesteredbhaalspawn]

Still just thinking about how it makes no sense for Bhaal to want there to be more Bhaalspawn. The existence of Bhaalspwan literally weakens him because they carry paces of his divinity, like in a way that that divinity is now separate from him, he cannot personally use or tap into it for power for himself. That's why all of Bhaalspawn born out of The Time of Troubles had to die (this includes the offspring of Bhaalspawn like Abazigal's son Draconis. Which Abazigal is literally a dragon not a Dragonborn. It would have been funny of Larian to make a Blue Dragon be a merchant. Or at least give him a human form resembling his portrait in Throne of Bhaal- dragons would never take the form of Dragonborns. Dragonborns where their slaves at one point after all. They don't respect them and would not take their form (this is also why it's very fucked up for Lae'zel to imply Dragonborns are inferior to dragons). I digress. That's an issue for another day.)

The last thing he would want, in his weakened state of not being a fully deity, would be more Bhaalspawn living in the world. He wouldn't want Bhaalspawn siring more. Because the children of Bhaalspawn are also Bhaalspawn.

The idea that Bhaal would want Durge to sire an army of Bhaalsapwn is just so wrong. Like why is it written like this? It just makes zero sense. I can only guess that they want to make Bhaal look sexually predatory? 🙄 (the only time it was implied he acted as such was with Gorion Ward's mother, it was not implied to be of SA for any of the other mothers either- from what I remember, but that was proven to be a lie implied by Gorion himself because Gorion's Ward's mother was actually a Bhaalist priestess who had his child willingly. I could go one forever by how none of the weird sex stuff surrounding Bhaal and the Bhaalists in bg3 is not supported by any sources outside of bg3. It's just really weird choices that I can't see as being made as innocent mistakes and not born out a place of ignorance or bigotry. That's just how I feel though.)

I seriously think that Larian doesn't know any lore.

[molinaskies]

Some people playing the DLC rn have never played Eggmanland from Sonic Unleashed and it shows.

To be fair, I ALSO think the DLC is holistically too hard (it’s unforgiving on hard mode and, at some points, even on easy). I was stuck on master king for 9 hours. But I’ve seen people say that the DLC is unrealistic for a child as if Sonic has never been this hard before.

Sonic Unleashed is difficult. Sonic 06 (for a number of reasons) is difficult. Hell, Sonic Adventure 2 is difficult. All of the classic games, to a degree, are difficult. This is also an optional, free story. It can be entirely bypassed, if needed.

Sonic is a franchise that challenges you. It dares you to push past your limits because that’s the whole entire thesis of these stories (quite LITERALLY for Sonic Frontiers).

The beautiful thing about being a child is that you have resilience. You will get up and try again. Something we can learn from children (and this franchise) is that it’s okay to fail. Pace yourself.

It’s okay to struggle and complain about your struggle. That’s a good thing, in fact. But this isn’t new.

[boxwinebaddie]

miss ninaaa why did u delete the kyley b origin story jewelery ask, i was IN LOVE with ittt

Anonymous asked:

wha happened to the kyley b post i miss iy already nina :(

AAAAAAAAH. :'( </3

so when i went to bed last night, i saw this first anon and already felt bad, but now that this second one has come in, i just want to say...

...that i am so, SO sorry, my loves.

and to quote every bad movie breakup scene ever:

it's not you, it's me.

( and specifically my very fucked up brain. )

HERE is the link to the kyley b (jew)elery origin post.

i plucked it out of the lost and pound just for you.

i'm...sorry, i deleted it.

**and heavily edited it; it was bugging me.

the short version of my answer is that i developed a very poor coping mechanism for stress/perceived inferiority where even though i love my ncu content, i convince myself that it's bad and i hate it, to the point where i 'make it disappear' so that it's no longer an eyesore.

the very long, personal mental health uncle nina psychological eval with a lowk frightening beginning and hopeful ( i think? ) end is below. tw for depressing thoughts and mentally-ill framing.

I Hope You Heal. <3

because, unfortunately, as a bipolar two girlie, i am extremely prone to spells and spirals of depression ( especially in the summertime ), which, when combined with my already self-confidence cannibalizing anxiety disorder creates a very toxic, negative, medieval torture chamber of a headspace which makes makes my brain…

Very Unwell.

in essence, because of how frighteningly fragile i become, even tiniest inkling of doubt in my mind can poison the entire inkwell...and when that happens, even though i know, deep down, in a healthy, reasonable place, that the content i curate is well-composed, well-received writing that i am passionate about and should be proud of...the cracks and fissures that form in my heart and pysche from the broiler room of pressure i put on myself to preform create several vulnerable visceral openings for My Imposter Syndrome to worm into.

but instead of whispering sweet, sweet nothings, it's doomsay screaming awful, awful Everythings! that this thing you wrote that you love? not good enough. Everyone Is Going To Hate That. the people who liked that post? they just feel sorry for you and if you had any remorse, you would feel sorry for subjecting them to something so underwhelming, stupid, embarrassing and beneath them.

You Should Delete It.

[ DELETE. ] IT.

...aaaaand because the sirens are going off in my head, i feel like the walls are closing in, i frantically press the panic button ( delete post ) and think that i am doing everyone a favor bc not only are you no longer having to read what my extremely overloaded and anxiety corroded brain has classified as "EMBARRASSINGLY BAD" work, but i no longer have to feel ashamed bc it's

Gone.

or well...Privated. ( in this case. )

because i DO work so hard on everything i post that even when i think that it is extremely underwhelming no matter what i do, it is Hard for me to delete it because of the brain-power, intensive-typing and heart that went into making them...so like...it's a strange thing because i know that it's just an echo-chamber of evil lies and untruths, but when i'm rocking back and forth, with my chest eating my knees, and my entire education degree goes out the window when i can't teach myself how to breathe because of how bad i feel...

it's hard.

but...like i tell my kindergarteners everyday.

You Can Do HARD Things.

life is not easy, but it is worth it.

loving yourself is not easy...

But YOU Are Worth It.

unfortunately, i am a better at preaching than practicing. but a large part of my irl job is modelling good behavior and on here, i was deeply moved and touched to find that so many of you think so highly of me, so i also want to model good behavior on here.

which hinges on honesty...and hope.

so, basically, i did delete my post, which is made me feel good in the moment, but overall is not kind to myself ( or to the people who enjoyed reading the thing i randomly killed with knives and hammers because it wasn't 'Perfect' ) and i do not like modelling avoidant behavior, but it is also important to show you that i struggle, that it is okay to feel strange and sad, but that i am working on...not deleting my posts because i am a perfectionist/scared of letting you all down.

which...was clearly not the case? Wowza.

i really did not realize so many people cared about that, aha! but please feel free to ask me anything about kyley b kyle ( i have been trying to generate my thoughts and form some hcs actually! i love him being a sardonic, smart alecky delinquent boy in giant ed hardy jeans and a million different street fighter gta rings on his fingers )

also feel free to ask me anything, flashback related, random hc related, personal or otherwise! i know i've got a ton in the box, but i promise that just because i'm going through a lot and posting sporadically, doesn't mean you have be a stranger...

Just Be Gentle.

with me and as always,

with yourselves.

-uncle nina, doing her best <3

[peridyke]

I will also say that a lot of the standards people are held to online are TERRIBLE for autistic people because a lot of it depends on picking up on an inherent understanding of what is right or wrong with very severe reprocussions if you mess up or misspeak. a lot of the callouts i see will be screenshots of someone saying something that the author and audience are supposed to know is wrong while also being the first time the subject had even heard that they did something wrong. or like people in discord servers absolutely flipping their shit going full aggro mode over someone saying the wrong thing because "they should have known better". and I guess whether you agree with that sentiment or not its a stressful thing to witness as an autistic person where often times trying to say the right thing in social situations feels like defusing a bomb. I think a lot of the time in the context of callouts people are already going in with the thesis of "this person is irredeemable" and so giving someone any kind of grace is antithetical to that point. so like anything someone says thats wrong or socially inappropriate is damning evidence of their dark soul. anyways I guess what I'm saying is I'm always sweating bullets whenever I'm trying to articulate myself online because I'm imagining every possible scenario where my words could get misinterpreted as an admission of guilt. so if I ever seem really unsure of myself to an exaggerated extent now you know why LOL

[atopvisenyashill]

i get to a certain extent when people push back at some anti targ stuff with “that’s a feudal system that’s how every house works” the problem here is that the incest and the dragons makes it worse.

i think you can draw a lot of parallels between baelon & ned and the way they fail their younger sisters, but crucially, lyanna does not show up in ned’s bed naked when asking for help the way viserra does. there’s a level of horror there that is much more severe when it comes to “women being nothing but wombs” when you are acting as a womb for your brother and when the only way you know how to ask for help is by attempting to seduce your older brother, instead of simply asking. yes plenty of husbands feel entitled to their wive’s loyalties, bodies, and wombs and plenty of old dudes marry much younger women but i Do in fact think there is something much more sinister about lysa realizing she’s been done wrong by hoster & jon and raging against them while miserably trapped in marriage and daemon spending literal decades grooming his infant niece into believing she will only be safe from harm if she turns from all others and relies solely on him for protection.

yes, stannis and renly react with extreme violence when faced with insecurity over being the younger brother in someone else’s shadow and stannis does a fair amount of damage to king’s landing…and yet what he does pales in comparison to aemond’s campaign of mass slaughter in the riverlands atop vhagar. yes, robb makes his grief over losing ned the problem of every lowborn person in the riverlands but aegon & visenya committ what i would argue is an indiscriminate and genocidal campaign of destruction (think ancient civilization genocides like rome against carthage) during the dragon’s wroth over their grief from losing rhaenys.

like, i keep seeing this “the only difference between the rest of the houses is the dragons and incest” but those are huge differences that impact the way their family works on a fundamental level. i think there is a level of horror to naerys desperately begging for a normal relationship with aegon only for him to continue raping children into her until she dies that is not present in similar marriages on the basis of “this is her fucking brother.” the entire system is feudal but the way the feudal system works in this specific family, because of their dragons and incest, brings the entire system to this natural, horrific endpoint and that’s the entire point of this whole family!

[nolanhattrick]

when 20 year old kids have to retire because of head injuries, you need to reevaluate the safety of your sport and the equipment you're putting them in.

[sentient-cloud]

Adding onto my frustrations at difficultly modes being bungled so badly by the devs. I am using the hall of heroes again as an example. They drop some pieces of merciless gear, a nice good gear set awesome! Except standard mode doesn’t drop. Anything. And challenge mode is the original cheats + extra rules such as PvP spell limitations. It’s noticeably harder than it was at first. And you just. Can’t play it like that anymore! So… who was this helping? You made grinding for gear significantly more frustrating.

To repeat from the tags my ideal way for these to be implemented is to have 3 difficulty settings, Easy (or idk some other term if they don’t want to use that term) which is what standard is now , Standard (what the fight used to be / for other fights going forward yeah. You know. Something more fair without added spell limitations and deck editing limitations ) and then Challenge.

And this is key. One, you should be able to choose whatever difficulty you want from the get go, no having to play through any which one first, if you know you like playing on hard mode you should be allowed to just do that without sacrificing story beats.

And two, idk. Maybe easy only drops the lower/mid tier of gear. Standard drops like normal. And shit, maybe challenge only drops the top tier? Because if the easier game mode is to help people who find fights like that frustrating, don’t lock them out of decent gear! (And then lock the gear behind dick smasher mode.)

Also while doing this add it for more fights. Ok that’s all 🚶‍♂️

[aeviare]

{like? are we also not gonna talk about traveler having the ability to purify abyssal energies *points at dvalin's tears and then aggressively pointing at xiao canonically stating he feels lighter when he's around traveler* helloOOO? we ain't gonna talk about that!?}

[sequesteredbhaalspawn]

I really want to make an all encompassing post at some point on how Larian fails at writing evil (in bg3) and two other all encompassing posts about how they failed at writing Viconia and Sarevok in particular. That isn't what this post is going to be, but I just need to air some things out for myself.

LIKE if you take all of the trauma that the bg3 companions have and combined them into one character, you have Viconia. And if you put in the effort to help her become a better person- becoming true neutral in alignment (the same alignment as Jeheira btw), you really get to see all of that. And yes it takes until the end of Throne of Bhaal to do, and it is actual work. You have to try, and keep at it, and it;s hard. It's not "just say nice things and then good things happen" there are a lot of ups and downs and unlearning of toxic behaviors that Viconia goes through. It takes time. It it's so rewarding to see her reach that.

I've said my piece on Seravok before. BUT I think it's extremely fucked they took such a nuanced antagonist, someone who killed a person your player characters is suppose to love (if you think they see that person as family) and you can still reach out to him, help him. make see how he was wrong and how it hurt him and the people he loved. get his alignment to change from chaotic evil all the way to chaotic good. But then Larian makes a black man who is incestuous and very abusive to his extremely white looking daughter/granddaughter. It's just so awful. I hated seeing it so much. Like seriously- why the fuck did they do that? It makes no sense. And I do think it's important to point out Sarevok being black. Larian treat the black characters in bg3 rather poorly. It's racist. Doesn't matter if they did it intentionally or not. If anyone is a black fan I would love to read any addition you'd want to add to this post.

They also just get so much wrong about this character? He was never a Bhaal worshiper. He wanted to use his situation of being a Bhaalspawn to obtain godhood. And this self distributive path is what causes Tamako to leave him. Because she knew she was going to loose him anyways if he didn't stop. And then he got into a new relationship where his new parent encourage his self destruction and benefited from it. Post series, in the end game slides, regardless if you helped Sarevok change his alignment or not, he personally escorts Tamoko's body back to her homeland, Kara-Tur (if you're interested there is a mod that let's Tamoko live and become a companion of Gorion's Ward. I haven't played with it yet, but I plan on checking it out. There are so many mods that let poc companions with scripted deaths live, it nice to see- even if those deaths could have been not written or at the very least have the abilities to save them should have been there from the beginning.)

Both of these characters are about the cycle of abuse, on rather it gets broken or not. Just like the companions from bg3 are. But Larian says "no they failed and in fact are irredeemable"

It's shocking that games from 1998 and 2001 had a better discussion on restorative justice. And yes it's a fantasy setting where you care suppose to fight people, you're not going to be able to do that with every character. But doing this better than a game in 2024? When we have so much more resources and knowledge about this? It's just disheartening.

That isn't to say that the original games didn't have their flaws, they very much did. The stuff from bg3 is just more raw right now.

[guccigarantine]

im not trying to start beef with anyone especially a post from two and a half years ago but for me there is no way to interpret cassander being an eidolon of war as anything other than a tragedy. his name is only ever spoken of to say he was a good leader during war times. no one remembers they were the youngest of three sibling never intended for the throne, no one remembers how long it took him to martyr himself, or that they made squid ink pasta for their friends, or that he was a doctor first. all of that is lost and the violence is all that’s left.