#sorry I’m gonna be insane about this for a while bear with me

[the-l-spacer]

Them: Mule Cookie isn’t real and cannot hurt you

Mule Cookie:

[pyramid-of-starrs]

Very Demure

Jongho x Fem reader

Genre: Fluff, optional smut

Summary: TikTok trends are so corny sometimes, still fun to fuck with your boyfriend with though

A/N: have 2 more stories I’m hopefully posting this week 🙂‍↕️ enjoy this cute little story with a bonus spicy scene

“Notice how my boyfriend wears brown because he’s a bear. Very cutesy, very mindful, very demure.”

“What…?” Jongho said as he looked at you recording him.

“Nothing.” You put your phone down and walked back to the kitchen of your apartment, leaving Jongho in the living room with a puzzled face.

A little later while you two were eating you pulled your phone out again.

“See how my boyfriend eats slowly but still enjoys every bite his hardworking girlfriend made for him? See how he gets a full plate because he works while I stay home and make TikTok’s ? He’s very mindful, very manly, very demure.”

Jongho watched you as he squinted in confusion once again, his button nose wrinkling.

“Y/N… why wouldn’t I enjoy my food- what are you doing ?” He questioned again, you quickly put your phone away again.

“Nothing, don’t worry about it. Enjoy your food baby sorry.”

Later you two were in the bathroom mirror getting ready for bed. Jongho wore a cute bear make up hair band you got him as he brushed his teeth with his face mask on and you just couldn’t resist. You pulled out your phone and propped it up, facing the camera towards both you.

“See how my boyfriend does his skin care while being cute and not gendering it? Very cutesy, very demure.” This time Jongho just slowly side eyed you. He knew questioning you would be pointless.

Finally you two were in bed, you sat with half your back against the headboard on your phone while Jongho was laying on your stomach with his strong arms wrapped around your waist. You looked down at how insanely adorable your boyfriend looked as he laid peacefully.

You tried to record slyly because you knew Jongho would not want to be recorded while he’s in his squishy teddy bear state but alas, you were determined to show your baby off on TikTok.

“See how my baby is the little spoon? Very modest, very mindful, very dem-“ before you could finish you looked into your camera to see Jongho giving you the strongest face of disapproval, you knew it was over from there.

“… put the phone down y/n…” he said in a stern voice.

“N-no I’d rather not.” You said knowing you were for sure in trouble.

“Y/n…” Jongho released your waist.

“Fine! Sorry Jjongie you’re just so cute, I have to show you off.”

“…okay but no more annoying trends… and ask before you record!” He said pinching your nose and returning to his comfortable position on you.

“Well I’m obviously not gonna do that but I’ll say okay for now!” You said going back to your phone, he sighed but didn’t even try to fight it.

“And don’t post that, you probably got all my bad angles.”

There was a moment of silence as you stopped typing then a swoosh could be heard.

“….what was that ?” He questioned.

“…nothing, sending last minute messages.” You said quickly.

About 15 minutes passes and Jongho’s phone buzzes. You, too busy on your phone to notice Jongho pick his phone up from the nightstand to check it.

ATZ GC:

Mingi: Jongho your girl has you all on tiktok looking crazy lol

San: I thought he looked very cute 🥺

Hongjoong: what the hell does demure mean????

Bonus scene:

Disclaimer:

Smut tags: unprotected sex, oral sex (f receiving), a bit of manhandling, teasing, fingering, fingers in mouth, drool, a little degrading ?? Dom Jongho, sub reader

You once again felt the cold stare of Jonghos eyes on you, you peeked over your phone to be met with his stone face.

“What?”

“You posted it.”

Your face immediately gave it away that you indeed did post that TikTok.

“Nooo…” you tried to look back at your phone to hide the guilt on your face.

“So why is my group chat telling me you did?” Jongho said.

“So you’re gonna believe them over me?” You said trying to escape this somehow.

“They sent me the link.” He pressed the hyperlink and your TikTok started to play.

“… you gonna believe your eyes over me-“

Jongho swiftly got up and off the bed. Before you could speak he was already pulling you towards him.

“Ah- wait Jongho okay I’m sorry I’ll delete it I promise.”

“Too late.” Jongho lifted your gown, revealing your bare pussy, before you could plead more he spread your legs, got on his knees and delivered a few licks to your cunt. He licked slow stripes up and down just drive you a bit crazy, he knew you would want him to go faster but you knew if you asked he would deny you. You bit down on your lip and used your hand to grab at his thick dark locks.

“Fuck- baby please, don’t tease me like this.”

Jongho began to lick slow circles around your clit. “Mmm tease you like what?” The vibration of his words shooting through your body. All you could do is try to ride his face as your hips began to move up and down while helpless moans left your lips.

He stuffed one of his thick fingers into your hole while he began to suck your clit, earning a louder whimpering moan from you. He slowly slid his finger in and out of your needy pussy, he knew you were going crazy and that one finger was never enough to make you feel full.

“Please, I want more.”

Finally Jongho released your ringing clit, keeping his finger pumping inside of you.

“More? Like what baby?”

“Your dick… please jjongie, want you to fuck me.”

“Oh my, that’s not very modest, or demure.”

Yeah, you deserved this.

“Please Jongho please.”

He finally added another finger to your neglected pussy and began working them faster inside of you, your moans getting louder.

“Begging for dick like a little slut, is that demure baby?”

He continued fucking his fingers into you, his eyes watched you as you slowly came undone on them.

“Please, please fuck me.”

“Aww you’re asking so nicely, how could I say no.” He abruptly stopped and removed his fingers. You groaned to complain but he positioned himself between your legs to replace his fingers. He pulled down his boxers, his thick, hard cock springing up. He aligned himself perfectly with your eager pussy and slid into you.

“Fuuuck Jjongie it’s so fucking thick.” You moaned out. Jongho didn’t reply, he instead began to slowly pick up speed inside of you. Your eyes rolled back as he pounded into you with no remorse. “Oh my fucking god” and other swears was all you could say.

“Such a dirty little mouth. That’s not very cutesy” you have to say the teasing made the whole experience a bit better for some reason. Your mouth hung open as Jongho effortlessly rearranged your guts. He took the opportunity to put his two wet fingers onto your tongue, your lips immediately closing around them. “Sucking your cum off my fingers like a good toy, so mindful, so demure”

Again, you deserve all of this.

“Now be a good little slut and cum on my dick for me okay?” He shoved his fingers deeper into your throat, causing saliva to fall from the sides of your mouth. He slowed his pace only a bit just so he could pound into you deeper, his heavy cock hitting you in the stomach. Your pussy began to squeeze around him as you felt him cumming deep into your cunt. His hot cum covered your walls as you followed behind him, covering his dick in your juices in return. His removed both his fingers and dick and went to the bathroom to get a towel to clean up the mess you to made.

He began cleaning you as you two enjoyed the silence in the room. The silence was short lived as you picked your phone back up and started to record.

“See how my boyfriend cleans up after himself? Very mo-“

“Y/N!”

“ don’t worry this is just for me.”

[darkbluekies]

AHHH JUST GOT ANOTHER REQUEST! silas with a crackhead gen z s/o.This guy would be so fking confused.😭😭

Silas:walk out of that front door and I'll break your legs👿👿.

s/o:*uses the open window besides the door instead and casually walks away*

Silas texting:WHY ARE YOU NOT HOME YOUR GONNA GO THROUGH HELL IF YOU DON'T COME BACK.

S/o: You're* dumbass and proceeds to ignore the calls from this dumb af guy.

first anon (im sorry but i thought this was funny 😭😭)

[Do you want to break him??? Congrats, you succeeded 😭]

Not a joking matter

Mafia!yandere OC x reader

Summary: you decide to pull a stunt on Silas while you are fighting, which causes him to go insane with fury. He promises himself to make sure you never dare to do it again.

Warnings: yandere content, mentions of killing, guns, threats, isolation punishment, Stockholm syndrome, Silas who can't take a joke, manipulation

Word count: 1.5k

Normally, you wouldn’t dare fight with Silas. It only gave you consequences you couldn’t bear. Besides, just giving in and listening to him makes your world turn easier. But some days, things get too much and your anger bubbles out. This has led you and Silas to argue down by the front door about his jealousy.

“I’m literally done!” you scoff out. “You’re insane, this is insane! I’m leaving!”

“If you walk out through that door, I’m breaking your legs”, Silas warns you with his arms over his chest. “Don’t test me, little thing.”

You give him a long stare before opening the window next to the door and jumping out. Silas gaze darkens as he watches you walk away. How dare you?

“What are you doing, boss?” one of his men asks with a shaking voice. “Are you just going to let them leave?!”

“They will be back soon”, Silas says through gritted teeth. “They can’t survive without me. And when they return, they’ll go back into the basement until they apologize sincerely.”

“And if they don’t come back, boss?”

“Then they’ll regret it.”

You walk along the road, cursing Silas for living out in the middle of the fucking forest. You’re not even wearing shoes! Why did you walk out like that? Well, at least you’re free. Right? This has to be worth it. You have to show Silas that you mean business … he can't treat you like that.

You reach the nearest city after an hour of walking. You're sure you've destroyed one skinlevel by now. No blood has been drawn yet, but your skin is ripped and dirty. You sink down by the side of the road, next to a coffee shop. Now what? You don't have any money … only your cell phone. Silas IT master has blocked the phone from calling any other number than Silas.

It buzzes. You look down and see a message from him.

"WHY ARE YOU NOT HOME?? YOUR GOING TO GO THROUGH HELL IF YOU DON'T COME BACK, DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?"

You shouldn't do it — it's childish — yet you do it. Your fingers tremble as you type the message back, but you can't help but snicker for yourself.

"You're*"

If only you could see his face once he receives the message. Silas, on the other hand, throws his phone at the wall once he gets your little fun text. He calls you, but you don't answer. He calls again … and again … and again. Same automatic voice telling him to try again later.

"This little shit, I swear to God-" he growls before grabbing his car keys. "I'm going to get them, I don't fucking care. They'll be sorry. Who the fuck do they think they are? Seriously? Fucking brat.”

“What are you going to do, boss?” the same man as before asks.

“If Y/N wants to act like a shitty, little brat, then I’ll treat them like one.”

He rips open the door and walks out to his black sports car. You might be his darling, but this car is his baby. Although he doesn’t know where you are, he has an idea. There's not a lot of places you could have gone to. You're not stupid enough to run into the forest, you'll have followed the road. You can't have gotten too far. He'll find you.

He notices that you're not on the road.

"These little legs were faster than I thought", he mumbles. "Just wait til I get my hands on you."

He drives into the small city, looking around. A smirk creeps up on his face once he sees you sitting on the sidewalk. He parks the car right in front of you and jumps out. His anger turns into some weird adrenaline kick once he sees your terrified eyes. He will punish you, don't you worry … but first he wants to play.

"Either you get in the car now or I'll make you", he says with one hand resting inside of his jacket, on his gun. "I'll blow this place up."

You know Silas, and you know what he keeps in his pocket. You know he's not lying. Suddenly, incapable of moving, paralyzed in fear, you shake your head desperately. Silas smiles.

"Boom", he says, forming his mouth to an 'O'.

"No, please", you whisper.

"Yes? If you say so …"

He's about to pull put the gun. You finally manage to move your limbs and shoot up from the sidewalk, stopping his hand.

"Silas, don't", you beg.

"But you wanted to be bratty and not do what I said", he pouts and gives you puppy dog eyes. "It's not more than fair that I get to play too?"

"Silas, people will get hurt if you do that."

"People could have gotten hurt by your stunt too. If I wouldn't have found you …" He moves closer until you can feel his breath against your face. "... I'd killed all of my men."

You shiver and give him a horrified glance.

"Y/N, get in the car now", Silas tells you seriously, no longer in the mood to play games.

And you do.

"Y/N, I want you to know something", Silas says as he starts driving away. "You only 'escaped' today because I let you. The only reason you're still alive is because I went to get you. You should be happy that I love you because what would you have done without me? You have no money, your phone — which you should be grateful I gave you — only works for my number … you aren't even wearing shoes!"

Your head slumps. You shouldn't feel so guilty, you shouldn't start to cry … but you do.

"I could have left you", Silas continues. He won't stop until you've broken down completely. "I could have forgotten about you and moved on, find somebody that actually appreciates what I do for them and is grateful for my love. But I went back for you because I love you."

He has noticed that you've started crying in the seat next to him, but he isn't done.

"People could have died today and it'd be all your fault", Silas says.

"Stop!" you shout and cover your ears with your hands. "I get it! I'm sorry!"

"I'm not sure you do, baby. That's why you'll spend a little while down in the basement once we get home. Just to make sure this won't happen again."

You want to protest, but his gaze makes you shrink to the size of an ant. Yu're already six feet down, no need to do yourself any further.

When you get back to his house, he pulls you with him down to the basement and chains you before saying a word.

"Silas, I'm really sorry", you sob. "I'll never do it again. Please don't leave me here.'

"You've acted like a complete brat, baby. My partner is an adult, not a damn child, do you get that?"

"Yes!"

"Good. I will see you in a while."

"No, Silas, please!" you shout. "Don't leave me here!"

You hear the door to the ground floor, leaving you in pitch black darkness. You sob out into the emptiness and hug your legs, burying your face into your knees.

You don't know how much time passes by. You have no idea how long time you've been down here, all you know is that your growling stomach stopped making sounds a long time ago. It doesn't hurt anymore … although it should. Your body must have gone numb because you can't feel anything. Or you've died. That's at least what you tell yourself. You no longer live and will never feel anything else ever again. This basement works wonders on the brain.

The door from the ground floor creaks. You look up, seeing how Silas come walking down. Your body fills with electricity. He came back!

"Hey, baby", he says and squats down in front of you.

"Silas …", you say quietly, tasting the name, seeing if he can hear you. Seeing if you're alive.

"Yes?"

A wave of relief flows through you. Your hands start reaching out for him, needing to hold onto something to fully convince you that you're still real.

"Careful, baby", Silas says softly and stops your hands. "I have to remove the chains first."

Impatiently, you wait for him to unlock the heavy metal keeping you to the ground. As soon as you feel the weight lifting, you throw yourself at him, locking your arms around his neck and hiding your face into his warm shoulder. He chuckles and wraps his strong arms around you in return.

"Eager to see me?" he smiles right by your ear.

You don't answer. You're happy to see someone. It just happens that this someone is Silas.

"Do you want to come upstairs now?" he asks.

You nod against his shoulder.

"You're not going to be a bratty little shit anymore?" he asks.

You shake your head.

"And you won't pull a childish stunt?" he asks.

You shake your head. Your humor doesn't work on him and you learned that the hard way.

"Very well then, let's go", Silas says and stands up, pulling you up with him.

You wrap your legs around his torso and keep your arms in place. You can hear him purr like a cat. Silas always gets what he wants. He always wins.

[keefitz-fan-blog]

Keefitz Incorrect Quotes

Keefe: We have a problem. Fitz: No, YOU have a problem. I have an idiot who keeps making them.

Keefe: Relationships should be 50/50. Fitz cooks us dinner while I sit on the kitchen counter looking pretty.

Keefe: Fitz and I are no longer friends. Fitz: KEEFE THAT IS THE WORST WAY TO TELL PEOPLE THAT WE’RE DATING!

Keefe: You got a date yet Fitz? Fitz: No… Keefe: Well you do now! Get your ass up and hold my hand!

Fitz: You are the love of my life and I would do anything within reason to make you happy. Keefe: I would be happy if you ate, stayed hydrated and got a reasonable amount of sleep. Fitz: I said within reason, Keefe. How about I murder that guy? Keefe: So murder is in reason but proper self care isn't? Fitz: Well, duh. What kind of question is that?

Keefe: Crushes are the worst. Whenever I’m near mine, I start acting stupid. Fitz: You always act stupid. Fitz: Fitz: Wait…

Computer: Please enter a password. Keefe: types in Fitz Computer: Your password is too weak. Keefe: How fucking DARE YOU-

Fitz: Okay, I’m going to get the wedding cake. Keefe: Perfect, while you do that I’ll check on the ring bear. Fitz: … Fitz: You mean ring bearER, right? Keefe: … Fitz: Look me in the eyes and tell me you are not going to bring a dangerous wild animal to our wedding.

Fitz: I'm bored, any suggestions? Keefe: Sleeping is nice. Fitz: I acknowledge your suggestion, and I’m deciding to ignore it.

Keefe: angrily presses Fitz against a wall WHERE'S THE MONEY?! Fitz: … Fitz: Are we about to kiss-

Keefe: BE A BETTER PERSON! Fitz: WHY?! Keefe: BECAUSE SOMEONE NEEDS TO HAVE MORALS IN THIS RELATIONSHIP, AND IT SURE AS FUCK AIN'T GONNA BE ME, SWEETHEART!

Keefe: Can I have 2 straws with that milkshake? Fitz: Aww- Keefe: With 2 straws, I can drink it double as fast!

Keefe: Fitz is restricted to decaf for the rest of this adventure.

Fitz, talking about Keefe: WHAT THE FUCK I WAS ARGUING WITH THEM AND I SAID “OOH YOU WANNA KISS ME SO BAD” AND GUESS WHAT? THEY DID. THEY KISSED ME. WHAT THE FUCK WHAT DO I DO.

Keefe: I’ve been dropping them the most insanely obvious hints for like a year now. No response. Fitz: Wow. They sound stupid. Keefe: But they’re not. They’re really smart actually. Just dense. Fitz: Maybe you need to be more obvious? Like, I don’t know… “Hey! I love you!” Keefe: I guess you’re right. Hey Fitz, I love you. Fitz: See! Just say that! Keefe: Holy fucking shit. Fitz: If that flies over their head then, sorry Keefe, but they're too dumb for you. Keefe: Fitz.

Fitz: My future partner must be brave, strong, intelligent, successful and organized. Keefe: steps on a caterpillar and proceeds to drop to their knees and sob while apologizing profusely Fitz: That one. I want that one.

Keefe: Fitz is playing hard to get. Keefe: Little do they know, I'm a master at playing hard to get rid of.

[mothmanssweetsucculentass]

Jason The Toymaker Headcanons

The grind never stops fr fr. Sorry for disappearing I had summer classes and then a certain triangle demon from a kid’s show is took up most of my attention and creativity, and now I’m in regular classes and silly goofy video games have taken up my attention and creativity when I’m not slaving over my art projects for school. Teehee. Oops!

Jason has been another underrated character in this fandom imo, and I especially love love love LOVE characters who just get so obsessed with shit. I can’t remember if it was canon or fanon about him, but I love the fact he gets so possessive of his friends to the point where he kills the competition. And also the friend. Because the best friend to have is one you have complete control over, right?

Anyways.

Cis man? WRONG.

Like you’re gonna look at Jason and tell me that motherfucker has only ever used he/him pronouns? Bro is an eccentric Toymaker ffs

Jason uses any pronouns. Even the ones that don’t exist. Bro collects that shit like Pokemon cards

Hey remember LJ? Yeah Jason made him

I mean hello??? Sentient toy clown? That’s right up Jason’s alley

Jason has also made other clown characters, like Candy Pop

Jason is also one of the few inhabitants that straight up doesn’t need to eat food. Ever

Much like Nina, no one’s really sure what he is, they just know its immortal like everyone else and insanely hard to kill

Most people also avoid them or go out of their way to not get emotionally close to him for super obvious reasons

Like. They’ve all seen her workshop. Every week he comes back with a new human he’s lied to and whisked off their feet with some bullshit fantasy and within the next few days they’ve made a doll of the poor guy

Jason technically isn’t even allowed to do that, humans aren’t allowed to know of the existence of the manor or Slenderman or literally anything that goes on there, but does Jason care? Absolutely not

Slenderman tried getting on her ass about it once, and by some miracle Jason was able to talk themselves out of punishment

Besides making morbid people dolls, Jason of course also makes random other toys. Almost all of them are sentient or are able to think and comprehend speech

Jason uses Mr. Glutton (the snake) as not only a chair, but a garbage disposal as well. Need to get rid of body parts? Give to the snake. It’s like a black hole in there

So y’know how Anne and Eyeless Jack are the go-to doctors of the residency? Jason is the fix it guy for anything that’s not biological

Torn clothing? Jason can sew it up for ya

Gun/chainsaw/mechanical weapon is jammed? Jason has a fix for it

Broken trinket from your room? Jason somehow has already made an exact copy of it for this specific occasion

You could count on one hand the things Jason doesn’t know how to fix

And still despite being the repairperson no one usually sticks around long enough to chat

You’d think with how delusionally clingy this mf is that it would be a problem but surprisingly no

There’s a reason why xe specifically only targets humans

Like? Humans as a species are so easy to manipulate? And are leagues more fun to torture and scare than her fellow serial killer roommates

Similarly to how the others make bets on what weird item Helen can use as a murder weapon, they also make bets on how fast Jason’s next victim gets dollified

So far the record is a single day because somehow one girl had the balls to pull an 80s horror protagonist and stabbed Jason with their own fabric shears

She didn’t get far. Obviously. What’d you expect from an entire mansion crawling with murderous entities. LJ accidentally clotheslined the girl while reaching between doorways for something

Everyone on the third floor then got to bear witness to Jason dragging her back to his workshop by her ankles. Using the same fabric shears. The carpet is still stained from how much she bled. I’m pretty sure one of her fingernails is still lodged in the wall, too

While they don’t share a studio/workshop, Jason and Helen often use a lot of the same crafting materials. They have a mutual relationship where if one of them goes out, they return with something both of them ran out of recently

Beyond that they literally never speak to each other, and they both like it that way

Jason is way too eccentric for Helen to be able to stomach for longer than an hour, and Helen is too particular with so many different things that it gets on Jason’s nerves

One of the few people that does stick around Jason often is Ann

Obviously there’s the underlying factor that Ann literally owes her current life to Jason, but even outside of that stipulation, Ann finds them pleasant to hang around

Unlike Jason’s other doll experiments and creations, Ann is the only one that came with sentience already attached. Saved Jason the hassle of having to create an entire consciousness network from scratch

Like damn, vengeance is one hell of a powerful force, enough so that once Ann was put back together by Jason, she was up and functioning practically immediately

The two aren’t inseparable per se, and definitely don’t see each other as anything more than friends (Ann moreso than Jason), but you can often find them in the same room interacting

Jason, like many of the others, adore Sally to an unnerving degree. It seems as if everyone, no matter how much they dislike kids or ghosts or humans or whatever else Sally counts as, feels a supernaturally strong urge to protect the kid. Jason is one of the few seen with her constantly

Yeah go figure the Toymaker likes to appease the child

But seriously it’s a little freaky how Sally has this effect on so many people. Someone should look into that

While it’s one of the most recent additions to the household, Jason is one of the oldest entities within the group.

Like hello bro was around in the late 1800s, Jason has peepaw bragging rights

With that comes the stipulation that Jason hates modern technology. The newest thing they own is a sewing machine from the 70s

I think it’s pretty obvious that because of his peepaw status, + the fact Jason thrives off unhealthy obsessive friendships, a lot of the younger residents hate her, and vice versa

Is friends/close with: Sally, Ann, Nina, and LJ

Is neutral about: Jane, EJ, Kagekao, Helen, and Slenderman

Doesn’t get along with/hates: BEN/Ben, Jeff, Clockwork, Puppeteer, Liu, Masky, and Hoody

Ben is practically the antithesis of Jason. Modern tech manipulator vs old fashioned old timey manipulator

If those two somehow end up in the same room it’s ON SIGHT

Nina and Jason are constantly bitching and gossiping about anything and everything under the sun. Somehow someone who’s besties with Jason’s rival is also besties with Jason. Nina is just that talented, apparently

Ofc they also bond over fashion. Who do you think makes most of Nina’s batshit insane wardrobe pieces?

Puppeteer annoys the hell out of Jason. That, and he keeps trying to steal and manipulate all the dolls Jason makes. Rude.

Jason is the only one allowed to destroy xer own work. If it catches you fucking with any of the dolls, thrown away or otherwise, you can kiss your existence goodbye because Jason will make it her life’s mission to see to it you never have peace again

Tries not to be in their true/corrupted form too often considering how rotted his arms get in that state. The skin flakes off and everything, and it’s really inconvenient when you’re trying to work on fine craftsmanship and your own rotten black flesh keeps falling into your paint or some shit

Not exactly the easiest thing to control though. The more emotionally volatile Jason is, the more likely you’re gonna see him at his worst

[thecapricunt1616]

The Bear S3 Capri Live React

WARNING! Spoilers for each episode below the cut!

EP 1 - “Tomorrow”

ASSHFBEJNSNDNEJWNENE AND WHEN IM BACK IN CHICAGO I FEEL ITTT!!!!!! WOOOOOO

CARMY HRJEJWJW YOU'RE OUT OF FREEZER JAIL MY LOVE!!

Oh your poor hand I wanna kiss it, my sweet baby :((

Omg it’s filmed so differenttttt AAAAAA!!!!

Zaddy walked in meaning business lets gOOO

Like I said in TB&HH and many of my one shots this is a STUNNING restaurant - like FUCK!!! Carmy is BRILLIANT !!

Carmen RELAX!! Jesus! With punting the chair!

Omg his notebook from The French Laundry!!! Cute

BRBEBSHSBSNSBSBSBSBSEBVELHCAA LUCAAAAAAA

COPENHAGEN OH MY GO FJEJWBDBD WERE BACK

OHRBE WE ARE SO BACK

New Yorks got everything :( OH this seeaaason is gonna rip my heart to shreeeeeds New York destroyed him.

Oh I think we are getting loads of baby chef Carmy FUCK 

Oh god oh god 'subtract'??? Fuuuuck

I would hate how perfect he always is HAHAHAHA I would haaaate working with him!!!!

Cousin Steve took care of him, I'm glad someone did 🥺

Oh fucking for Carmy to kiss me like that 

The kiss on the nose is everything I want to do in life 

SORRY. THE WORDS OMG GOOD BOY GOOD BOY

OMG SYDCARMY KISS KISSKISSKISSIIISSS

“It’s never gonna happen again” he will die before it happens 

Good apologize to Richie you FUCKING IDIOT and good for saying I’m sorry good for saying I love you. Good boy. Good boy. 

He is about to make everyone miserable.  

“I know you are, honey” that is his real mother figure. 

While Mikey was dying Richie was destroying his marriage trying to save him and Carmy was getting verbally abused in New York. I am…gutted! 

I have thought about Carmy finding out about Mike. I never. Fucking. Thought. They. Would. Show it.

ARE WE SEEING MIKES 

WE ARE OH NY FJEBE WE ARE SEEING MICHAELS FUCKING OH HIS FUNERAL HE SAT. OUTSIDE. OH I AM COOKED THIS SEASON I AM C O O K E D !!!!!

“LET IT RIP BEAR” OH FHEJWBDBDB 

Like a mother Nat snuck the money in his pocket. I’m fuckin CRYYYING BRO THIS SEASON IS GONNA GUT ME 

The best meal Syd has ever had 🥹

The fennel makes him think of Syd because she has an allergy I’m gonna stroke out. 

EP1 ; Final Thoughts - SydCarmy is SO happening if it doesn’t what the fuck are they doing. Baby Carmy is gutting me. I hope Luca doesn’t go away after this episode. Mikey. Oh, Mikey :(((. Natalie? The cinematography - oh I’m about to EAT w these fics. Oh my god.I am fucking GUUTTTEEDDD THIS SEASON IS GOING TO DESTROY ME

EP2 - “Next”

SYD! MY GORL THERE YOU ARE BBY!!!

the AirPod falling out is so real

Lmaoooo her dad !! She is absolutely moving out as soon as she can 

Awww the ‘love you chef’ <3

See this music like shut up SydCarmy or bust!!! lmaooooo

Why is the fourth wall being broken???

His anxiety is so insane he is acting cracked out LMAO

CICERO OH NO - this is gonna be INSANE

Carmy needs to step off Syds dick and give her some control lmfaooo - like ? you don’t even own this place little man.

“Technique is spelt wrong but OK” BYE THIS IDIOTTTTTTTTTTTTTT 

“You know buddy, I tried to call in and get you an order but they says you was back in the fridge yelling at yourself” LMFOAAOAOAO VJKFDNVLAKNLKVN I AM CRYING HE IS I LOVE UNC SO MUCH

everyone is asking him why the fuck he’s doing this and he cant say “because i cant stick my dick in syd” so he doesn’t know what to say.

He’s quitting smoking not for his health but to save … time. Alright then.

“The computer drafted the agreement so make sure you have a lawyer look at it” CAAAACKLING 

DAAAAADDDYYYY RICHIEEEE

Carmen shut the fuck up you are in no position for fuck yous.

“I commend your bravery from inside a locked vault” IM DRFNDJSNENN HAHAHAHA GET HIM RICH

“Oh my god am I finally having a stroke?” “Am I having a stroke?” These POOR WOMEN SOMEONE PUT CARMEN ON A FUCKING LEASH

“I insist that you get fucked my good man” BYEEEEE HAHAHAHAHAHA RICHIE IS TOO FUNNY 

They are bickering like BITCHES 

his ego needs to be stroked lmaoooo he’s asking Syd to stroke his ego 

“I know sweetheart, don’t be scared” NATALIEEEE HAHAHAH It's ok Fak I'M scared of Carmy rn lmao.

holy fucking shit Carmen you are driving me CRRAAAAZYY SHUT UP 

“This is scary” FAK, HONEY I KNOW CARMY IS CRACKED OUT

“Every day Jeffery-Ballet?” TINA HAHAHAHA I LOVE THAT 

This IS banana town sweetheart Fak

“Sup PIMP” PLEEEASE HAHAHA

“He was gonna tell us what he said to Claire”- Richie: “classic behavior dysregulation” PLLLEEASE

“Then I actually take it back, fuck you” i love Richie down

“What’s nunya” “nunya fuckin business” THE WAY IM CRRRY LAUGHINGGGGG LMFAAAAOOOOO THIS IS A GLIMPSE OF HIS CHILDHOOD

The gum chewing is sexy 

“Is that what you did” “no i’m just here if you need anything” oh, Carmy :(

Oh, Marcus :((((((. “Take us there bear” “yes chef” oh my god I’m crying again 

EP2 ; Final Thoughts - Carmen needs to fucking relax and I’m gonna say this probably a lot. Omg the fighting with Richie in this episode was pissing me off they are fighting like catty brothers!!! The moment with Marcus at the end really got to me. This was overall though a hilarious episode

EP3 - “Doors”

Marcus mom funeral!! Awww I’m glad they all are there for him. Thiiis is the moms funeral, ok, so they did it all in one day the shooting for both funerals so we wouldn’t know!!!

I wonder how Carm feels he’s there for Marcus’ mom but wasn’t for his brother 

Wow this speech must be so impactful for Carmy to get a glimpse into someone else’s life like this 

Look alive lizards we are OPENN

Richie is so goooodddd at his job 🥹🫶

For the bear and his honey fans princess cake is 100% going in there hahahah

Hmm things are going a bit too well 

Carmy throwing so much good decent edible food away makes me twitch. 

Carmy and his little edible flowers hahaha I love it

“The rare Transylvanian 5 titted goat?!” CICEROOO HAHAHAH

“Joy” “this is a waste of time, give it to sugar” HAHAHAHA

LMAOOO SINGING HAPPY BDAY IN SPANISH HAHAHA LOVE IT

Fak not putting it ON THE TABLE and Richie being like “keep my mans name out of your mouth “ PLLLELEEEASEE

Something abt Carmy cleaning is so hot

GRAAAHHH THAT PIECE OF BACK SKIN POKING OUT OF HIS SHIRT WHEN HE BENDS OVER

They’re being so too hard on tina :((

Richie is bringing patrons to the kitchen and Carmy is just violently bitching Syd out I am dead also, someone get the belt i’m gonna beat him.

This goes out to everyone who said there’s no chance the bear could fail and that it was a stupid idea it could? (cough- ex moots, cough) ; please tell me why they don’t even have a star and they’re already doing poorly with funds

I can’t- Carmen and Richie are fully going at each others throats and physically fighting.

Please Fak just grilling customers for info.

Carmy is SO little brother and I wanna choke him “we’ll figure it out” “ME?” “I’m trying to use less shiiittt >:(“ like a winey bitch - YOU ARE AN ADULT SHE IS THERE TO HELP YOU YOU LITTLE COCKSUCKER DO YOUR GOD DAMN JOB EFFICIENTLY

Carmy is losing it he needs to be medicated ASAP

Thank GOD Syd is putting her foot down and telling him to shut up

Syd looks fed the fuck up, rightfully

EP3 ; Final Thoughts - Holy shit Carmen is going nuts. Sydcarmy is going so hard rn he needs to finish shit with Claire so he can admit his feelings to himself about Syd. He needs to stop being so mean to her, he is going to cause her to panic. Whats so funny is I drafted Carmy bitching Syd out in my OC fic in the most recent chapter before this even came out (but in my world (in girl world) winnie is behind him chewing his ass out and literally told him he’s acting like his old boss) But it’s funny because hes literally telling her abusive ass shit his boss told him.

EP4 - “Violet”

Ohhhhh to kiss Carmy that way. A dream

The nose kiss oh my god oh my god 

He’s such a good listener 

He is so fucking - oh my god this man. This man. I need him astronomically 

Marcus :(((

I love Syd’s scarf but also lmao the stress of that docu - I get you girl hahah

Yaaaay she’s moving! 

This apartment is stunning!!!

DAD RICHIEEEE AHSHDJSHSHJ EVA OMG CUTIE PATTOOOTIEEE

Him laying with her is so cute. 

“He’s not my uncle like Carmy” 🥹PLS SO CUTE

This is so good such kid convo omgggg kids are just like thissss!! He’s such a good dad omfg playing her handdddd fuckFUCKCJCKCJC expect more Richie content soon

DONNAS GOING TO TIFFS WEDDING OMG!!!!!

Yes daddy TAKE THAT RING OFF YOURE A NEW MAN PAPA 

LMFAOAOAOA THEM SCREAMING HELP

“Maybe you’ve reached as far as your talent can go” makes MY stomach hurt, dawg 

“I feel like Bear is starting to respect me” please the way they look up to him I cantttt lmao

YAY MORE DAD RICHIE 

TAYLOR SWIFT!!!!!!!!!!

This Frank guy is weird- they made a great job at making this feel awkward as fuck.

HE DID INVITE HIM TO THE WEDDING OH GOD

that’s my girl! 

Oh is she about to get poached

Oooo like not Carmy??? Oooooo hes trying to poach her

Marcus has such nicely manicured hands

The way they just stuff snacks in faks mouth to make him go away hahaha love it

Mmhmm this season will make me fall more in love with Richie then ever before

Richie. Richie. Richie. Richie. Richie. Oh my god. My heart is being ripped out 

Wait they’re being reviewed for a star?! Already? They JUST opened! 

EP4 ; Final Thoughts - This was SUCH a Richie episode! I loved it alot :))) <3!!! So many Dad!Richie moments that made me smile. He also almost made me cry with his whole being alone thing. I will remedy my sadness with writing Richie fics literally probably tomorrow because holy holy holy this man I need to give him kissesssssss

EP5 - “Children”

So do the Bears all have the same alarm clocks?

Marcus speech really touched Natalie :((

Carmen doing the boxes by himself HAHAHA its what he deserves!! BAD BOY! 

Syd the ultimate good friend helping Marcus with his moms stuff 

Syd looks so cute her outfit is adorable 

Lmaooo Syd with her dead mom club jokes she’s too funny I see why Carmy is so whipped 

The Bear and His Honey is going to fucking SLAP with this new Carmy content WOW

Him throwing away more food that is perfect literally perfect. *sarcasm*

I wanna leave hickeys on Richie’s neck so bad - it’s so pretty 

Omg Carmys mentor closing the restaurant- he’s spiraling and looking at the every second counts she instilled in him- oh god.. Oh god-

Richie has grown so much im so so proud of him! 

He is crushing on this girl from Ever so hard

IS THAT JOHN CENA?!

JOHN CENA IS A FAK I AM DBHSJABDBEBE HAHAHAHAH

Carmy is gonna get his legs broken if he doesn’t cut it out hahahaha

Fak drinking a Capri-sun LOL

Omgggg him saying to fire Marcus you are CRAZY 

Lmaooo Jimmy venting to syd and saying that carmy has a tree up his ass

Carmy finding baby pics I’m SICK

EP5 ; Final Thoughts - WOWOWOWOW This is the last ep. I am watching tonight I need to digest. This was such a cute Richie ep. I am so in love with Dad!Richie. He is such a good, good dad. I also am dead- John Cena as a Fak? And having a mikey esc. Haircut???? And smoking in the restaurant- and then them saying it smells like smoke I am dead as fuck. Richie really really wants this review to go well, I hope it does:((

EP6 - “Napkins”

Good morning! time for e6 It is Directed by Ayo so i fear it is gonna kill me :) !

Well at least Tina has a normal clock 

Oooo get down on it!!!! Let’s go Tina!!! Get in that groove mama! 

Tina is so Puerto Rican mom I love it so so much 

Tina’s married?! I love it!! how sweet 

If Mikey’s in here- I’m gonna fucking die 

Baker tina!! Oh- customer service Tina? No! Books Tina!!! Smart girl!! that’s my lady :))

NOOOO - WHAT ?! THEY’RE LETTING HER GO?!

THIS IS WHAT LANDED HER AT THE BEEF??? THIS???

Oh Tina I’ve been there mama you’ll land on your feet :((( That’s right baby everything will be ok 

One thing about this show is all of the characters need routine 

The degree thing pisses me off to no end because of how real it is. Like shes been doing this 15 years and knows it better then someone right out of school with a stupid degree.

Awww Tina and hubs been together so long!! So sweet I love it her husband is good to her. 

I sooo love Tina is getting her moment the actress is so kind and amazing 

Woah I thought the big interview would be at the beef LOLLLL like not that it’s big but that they really need her lolll 

Oh my god. They hired someone ??? What the fuck and didnt tell her?!! RUDEEEE 

This little fucking prick oh my god yes Tina fuck him

Aw baby I wanna hug her it’ll be fine mama I know it doesn’t feel like it

Bus is delayed SO SHE COULD APPLY AT THE BEEF HAHAHAHAHA

THERES MY MANNNN RICHIEEE!! HES SO HOT AAAA

“Maam you can’t smoke in here anymore” I can’t hahaha

Everyone calling him handsome I can’t hahah he is! But still hahaha

Omggg richieeee I love him he’s always been so sociallll!! Get ready to eat with the beef Richie oh. Wow. This whole scene is so chef kiss i cant wait to write more the beef!richie

FAKS FAKS FAKS ok where’s Mikey HDBDHAHSHEBDNEBSBD. THERE HE IS IN SHFJENSNSJEJEJENDNEJWKA

MIKEY OH MY GOD JEJSNANQ

RICHIE LMAO STOP THEY ACT HOW IN KNOW THEY WOULDDD

“She can’t be crying in here” I am done LMAO

I fear I’m seeing the Mikey crush AAA “sandwich really that bad??” Stop being funny !! I also see how he got Carmy out of his panic attacks what a brother stop Mikey!! Why would you do that Mikey everyone loved you so muchhh 🥺💔

Gosh Mikey IS so handsome

THE HAUNTED EXPLODING TOILET THAT CARM IS STILL DEALING WITH HAHAHAHA

oh my god Carmy takes after him SO SO SO MUCH oh my god Carmy takes after him so much 

Oh my gosh I didn’t realize she was older then Richie!! 46 means something in this show- did Mikey…at 46? If he did I will fucking sue 

OMG SHOWING HER THE PIC OH ANS TELLING ABOUT CARMY SHUT UP HE “hes the shit” he wasn’t allowed to work at the beef because mikey knew that he’s better then the beef. He sees so much in him I knew that was the case!!! I’m sick 

My god !! Carmy!! Takes!!! After Mikey so fucking MUCH!!! 

Oh Mikey- oh. Mikey. Oh Mikey. Oh Mikey. Oh Michael Berzatto. Hit me while I’m down PAL kick me why don’t you?! “I knew I was gonna get skipped because I had people to take care of” I knew this episode would make me sick. 

oh my god when Tina said she loved Mikey she loved Mikey like a good friend and I am so gutted when Carmy says everyone loved Mikey and he just lit a room up and could make anyone comfortable oh my god I’m so gutted!!!!!!!!!!! 

EP6 ; Final Thoughts - This episode let us truly meet Michael & oh my god it’s almost painful to watch these back to back like- this is a lot to digest holy fuck. When Carmen talked about a temp in a room and how Mikey could feel it then lean into it and manipulate it however he wanted. He did such a good job portraying that. I’d give anything for him to have just called Carmy when he was on that bridge and for him to have answered and for Carmy to change his mind. Oh my god I’m so- like oh my god? This show. I can’t.

EP7 - “Legacy”

Carmy so pretty :)

Oh Richie. Thinking about :((( everything. 

Syd thinking of Carmy 

SHE IS GETTING POACHED BY EVER MAN OH NO

good Carmy is back at AI-ANON 

so much fucking family hahahah god I love Italians hey uncle Gary! 

*sighs* good morning, Syd. 

Oh. Ok he’s opening his own place ok…and he’s asking her I KNEW IT POACHER!! POACHER!!!!!

oh my god he’s offering her a real CDC job - with a real good salary,  it would be healthier for her sadly!!!!!!

How’d I headcanon Carmy knew French PUUUURRIODD 😌

“You look nice” ha. Ha. Ha.  Shoot me in the FUCKING FACE

The gum chewing HNNNNG IM CHEWING ON MY CAGE

“That sounds legendary pal” I WANT TO KISS HIM ON HIS STUPID MOUTH 

ARE THEY PART TIME THE BEEF NOW?!! OH MY GOD- THEY ARE!!! EBRA IS LIVINGGGG HAHAH OMG THIS IS SO COOL???

“Matter of fak supply” LOL

Richie is taking this so seriously which makes me more mad how Carmy treats him like he really is so good at the job and loves it.

Aw he really misses Tiff. :( he’s so different now and wishes he could go back so bad but he’s gonna find someone that I’ll be very jealous of bc I need this man SO BAD

Oh him crying abt Mikey- no stop I can’t 

SYDS TURN IN THE BOXESS HAHAHAH

“Hey grandpa” “hey grandma” I love Ebra and Tina sm lol and her mimicking his accent they’re adorable 

“Maybe you can go fuck, Ted” hahahaha I love telling people to go fuck now 

Eva’s drawing in Richie’s host book 🥹🫶

Carmen I wanna choke you out so bad!  Can you take a single suggestion ???

THE BABY IS COMING :D!!!!

EP7 ; Final Thoughts - Another good episode!! Very balanced which I like, the character centered episodes feel very heavy but I still love them. I'm just happy that we got a little bit of a second to breathe!! I think it’s cool how they’re doing the beef on the side, like so cool! I never thought of that as an option. Because it’s true the neighborhood would probably miss their local sandwich spot! I liked this episode a lot :) Carmy can go fuck this episode, though he’s in the dog house and I hope Syd leaves to teach him a lesson! (& it makes him realize he loves her!!!)

EP8 - “Ice Chips”

I’m guessing before we start Nat is gonna find comfort not in her brother, but in Syd! 

Oh poor Nat all alone :( PETE ANSWER THE PHONE- SYD ANSWER -CARMY ANSWER !!! SOMEONE ANSWERRRRR

CLAIRE SHES FINDING COMFORT IN CLAIRE. NO HER MOM!!! OH MY GOD OH DONNAAAAAA WHAT 

oh my god Donna SUGAR oh my god sugar snapping on Donna I can’t 

COACHING. SHES BEING A MOM HAHAHAH PLEASEE 

someone get someone here other then Donna 

My Scorpio sissy Natalie !!! 11/10/88 (this confirms to me carmy is still in his 20s theres no way hes 33 when nat is 34)

Donna needs to leave this is the worst she’s the worst birth partner ever 

At least Donna is being nice 

She never told her mom she was pregnant??? Wow!

Donna’s labor with Carmy being so incredibly hard is honestly canon! That is so funny actually. Yeah that kid makes everything hard for himself! 

lol you get that epidural queen!!!

I’m glad Donna is hearing that she scared them as children. 

Donna is an alcoholic because her mother had problems

Ok I’m feeling Donna sympathy 

Oh a mothers love. Please STOP THIS I DONT WANN A FEEL BAD FOR DONNA 

EP8 ; Final Thoughts - wow. Wowowowowowowowow 0 Carmy and 0 Richie basically but this was nats episode and Donna’s! I am happy we were able to see the sweet side of Donna, I think (and hope !!) she is on the right path to sobriety!!! This episode was very tender , I loved hearing about their childhoods more <3 Nat is gonna be a good mommy!!!

EP9 - “Apologies”

Magic? Ok sick, ok Marcus!! That’s who was watching this ok then wonder what thats about?

“Claire is peace” please- the thought of her gives you a panic attack. 

He’s gonna apologize this episode Jesus we wasted a whole season still no sydcarmykiss. It’s ok guys stay strong we’ll be there next season 

Yes Syd leave him 

Carmen you are nuts!!! 

Richie and Carmy staring at eachother through the window like bears about to kill eachother is freaking me out.

Syd say it -

Oh wait it’s the funeral for ever lol! I forgot that’s the funeral. Ok not worried 

He goes to the walk in to try to make it in his mind like he hasn’t waited all this time to apologize hahahaha 

AND RIGHT TO SYD AND THE AGREEMENNT I DJSJEBDJSJEHSHWHSBD SYDCARMY TILL I dIEEEE

“Missing one, that wouldn’t the the thing happened to be wedged up your ass the last few weeks is it?” JIMMYYYYY HAHAHAHAHAHA

Jesus this man’s eyes literally glow blue 

He owes him sooo much money wow 

Tina and Marcus are so cute

Carmy and his drawings are adorable 

Ten minutes left and Carmy hasn’t said sorry lol 

His little smile at the farm AAAA

Syd ls bringing them food before Carmy 

No she’s right Carmy I’m sorry why wouldn’t it be immediate insurance what is … wrong with you?

Oh my god fak going to see Claire Fak leave now no no no no no no no no oh my god this is so bad 

Mommy Nat 🥹💖

Aw Carmy looking at mikes funeral card 😭💔

EP9 ; Final Thoughts - Why does this season not feel done?! Well prob because they’re gonna do a season 4. But still there’s no way they can finish all of this in one episode. Holy moly the Faks need to stop interfering this is so bad!!!! Too many Faks!! Ok I can’t last episode time AAA

E10 - “Forever” !!!!!!

This mentor I like very much 

He took the popes nose thing from this mentor hahaha

This man who mentored Carmy it’s understandable why he was so driven or like, inspired to keep going

LUCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA LUCAAA LUCA LUCA LUCA LUCA

LUCA LUCA HES SO CUTE HRJJEJSJEJDNDJSNSNS “is that injected? Or is it…oh..ok” CUTE SHY EMBARASSED LUCAAAAAA

OMG CARMY MINGLING GOOD BOY!!!

Richie is crushing on Jess hard 

Luca oh baby I wanna kiss himmm oh him 

SYDYFBDNANA. SYD SYD SYD SYD CARMY IS GONNA EXPLODE 

oh my fid oh my god oh my god oh my god his boss his his oh my god 

Oh my god oh m y god “working for a bad boss is the worst because the culture you’re a part of is the culture you create” Carmen is spiraling rn (the next chapter of my oc fic is gonna go crazy)

Syd being more sociable then Carmy bc Carmy is panicking 

This smug bastard loves that he makes Carmen squirm I wanna punch him

“This is why you’re alone you can’t handle this” I’m going to fucking stab something

Carmy finds 0 joy in cooking anymore. 

Richie is so lovable the boss loves him and knew him for less then a week hahahahah

Carmy OH CARMY CARMY CARMY OH CARMY  “generally being you” my jaw is my jaw my jaw my jaw my jaw my jaw on THE FLOOOOORRRRRRRRRR. Oh my god. He’s such this asshole boss I hope he dies holy fuck HOW DARE HE HOW DARE HE HOW DARE HE HOW DARE HE. I WANT TO PEEL OFF HIS SKIN

Luca and Syd??? Ok- I say go for it queen

My mind is blown so far this is so amazing but also how the fuck hasn’t he sorted with Claire and S3 is closing???

Omg after party at SYDS?! Where is Carmy??? literally Marcus and Tina are there and the Faks?? He has to be seeing Claire there’s no way why would he miss out on this!!!!

If only Carmy got to be apart of something fun. Of course he’d deprive himself. OF COURSE

He is… giving Syd ptsd like his boss did to him. She is having done to her what was done to him.

Oh Syd. Oh Syd. Oh you need to get out of there baby it’s killing you. I hate seeing her upset its hurting me.

Their review was bad…. :((((((((((((

YES I KNEW ITTTTTT!! TO BE CONTINUED !!!!! ASDFGHJKLASDFGHJKL

EP10/S3 ; Overall Final Thoughts -

IM CRYING omggggg omg omg omg omg omg omg the whole thing with the boss had me in actual tears. TB&HH is about to eat so hard so so hard oh I have so many ideas AAAA and I’m so in love w Richie even more then last season he is totally crushing on Jess. Oh my god syd needs to get out of the bear Carmy is actually killing her. He is doing to her what his boss did to him and that’s evil!!! Evil evil. Oh my god so many thoughts I have but wow just wow. I can’t most of all wait to read the rest of the fandoms thoughts WOW my fics are about to eat I’m so inspired ALSO SydCarmy fics are about to be so angsty and eeeeeaaaatttttt!! He is slowly killing his girl, also - him being able to say sorry to syd but not claire??? I’m mad that the Faks had so much screentime like they were funny sometimes sure, but waywaaay too much faks. Not enough Nat, not enough MARCUS!! The most powerful touching scene or at least most inspiring of the season for me was the one with carmy & his old boss the sack of shit, that scene is gonna propel tb&hh so farrrr also this whole season is going to! Im so excited to keep writing that. I see people are not liking this season in my peeks on my home page (i didnt want to taint my thoughts) but im kinda surprised - like yes we didn’t wrap everything up & there were too many faks and not enough syd BUT the cinematography was stunning, and we got to see in carmys head which is what i predicted - this season was to get in his head to see 2 main things 1) how he does what he does 2) why he is how he is - and we got both of those answers, I think everyone was expecting this to be the last season and it was never going to be! In order to wrap this up we had to fully understand why carmen is how he is, are you all catching my drift here? I cant wait for S4!!! I feel it that SydCarmy will happen, I know that chefkids will put it in to words because their brain is much bigger then mine - but wow wow and wow. I’m gonna have to watch each episode 10 more times to digest it but wow. Loved it! MOST OF ALL I CANT WAIT FOR S4!!!!!! AAAAA

[hana-bobo-finch]

It is time for the rambling I have been ominously foreshadowing!! Hyperfixation yapping under the cut, you have been warned!!! I’m really sorry for all this, once the floodgates are opened I’m never gonna be able to shut up

Yeah that’s right it’s time to expose everything. Let us begin with an exposition-filled history lesson! September 29th, 2017. Around 7 years ago now. On this day, the first pages of a pokemon fan comic were posted to tumblr, and to deviantart—keep this tucked away in the back of your mind, this will be somewhat important later on.

This comic followed not the canon of the games, but of the anime. And I hate the anime with a burning passion—well, pre-season 26 anyway, but that’s besides the point. This comic, however, focused much more heavily on team rocket and their backstories, sort of as a way to fill in the gaps and such that the show never explained, which is something I don’t hate thaaaat much (in fact such things are a huge inside joke between me and my friends) sooooo yea

Now DO NOT WORRY!! you have to know absolutely nothing about pokemon to understand what I’m about to start yapping about! In fact, I myself tend to actually forget it’s a pokemon fan comic, it’s become so much more to me. But we will get to that later on. Point is, it’s not important to know the ins and outs of the context behind the comic itself. All you need to do is bear with me as I attempt to explain everything and why I am so insane

Back to the comic though!!! It’s title is Roots!!! Hence the weird-ass bug fables dialogue I posted to foreshadow all this. heehehehee yeeeees roots my beloved. It was all posted on a now-deactivated tumblr account (again, keep this tucked away in the back of your head) and was posted from, as I said previously, September 29th, 2017, to December 15th, 2018, spanning 167 pages. It was relatively popular at the time I think? It’s bit hard to say but it peaked at around 400-500 notes at the highest and averaged around 75 notes per update—at least on tumblr, I can’t speak to how popular it was on deviantart

ANYWAY the actual story or quality of the comic isn’t really important to this rambling. I mean yeah I have some VERY strong opinions on it, both good and bad (THERE IS ONE CHARACTER WHO I WOULD KILL. I WOULD CURB STOMP HER SHE MAKES ME SO ANGRY SHE MAKES ME SO FUCKING ANGRY AND SHE’S WRITTEN SO TERRIBLY. SHE’S NOT THAT BAD IN CANON I THINK BUT IN ROOTS I WOULD SLAP HER. I WOULD SLAP HER SO MUCH. I LIKE CHARACTERS WHO WERE MEANT TO BE TOTAL ASSHOLES MORE THAN HER), and if I could make a 100 page essay digging into every last detail of it, down to the most minuscule details that do not matter in the slightest, I would, but that’s not really what this is about. It’s not necessary to explain the plot, and. Um. Admittedly, despite roots being my number one top hyperfixation for almost a year now I doooooonnnn’tttt really know how well I understand the plot. THERE IS A REASONABLE EXPLANATION THERE IS A REASONABLE EXPLANATION, I READ A LOT OF IT OUT OF ORDER AND WAS MISSING A LOTTA IMPORTANT CONTEXT WITHOUT REALIZING IT!! I AM NOT A FAKE FAN IM JUST STUPID BUT UH point is it’s not really important. What is important, above all else, are the characters!!!

Being a fan-comic, a vast majority of the characters are preexisting characters from canon. And therefore a lotta the characters I’m not all too attached to. There are, however, a couple of original characters thrown into the mix to either fill in gaps or to move the story along. And I love them. Like actually love them so much. Frankly they’re my favorite part of it they are SO funny and perfect and yeah. I will immediately forgive any shortcomings in the story itself when I remember that THE CHARACTERS EXIST, OOOOOOO I LOVE THEM ALL SO MUUUUUCHHHUHhh. I want to yap about them all so much but I don’t have the time actually no screw it I am unable to stop talking, I swear I’ll make this quick tho

ok ok ok comin in at number 3 is my girl belle. she does nothing. seriously she is just there as a plot device and then she immediately disappears but I love her. she is constantly apathetic and pissed off at everyone and is just there for easy money. she is a mood. She’s also a horrible fucking person, so that’s an automatic plus in my eyes. what a queen (SHE’S NOT A QUEEN SHE IS ACTUALLY SO HORRIBLE) (ACTUALLY NO I’M DOUBLING DOWN. WHAT A QUEEN)

comin in at number 2 is KURT!!! uhhhhhhhhhh dude I dunno lmao I just think he’s neat he’s a pathetic creature and everyone is so mean to him for no reason. he was the target of ABLEIST HARASSMENT from the WORST CHARACTER. kurt deserves the world. he wears suspenders! And, surprisingly, he is Not A Horrible Person. most of my favorite characters are (yall should know this by now, my pfp is Louie) so he is unique in that regard

comin in at number one is of course the man the myth the legend pumpkin daddy. That is not his real name but that leads us to the next point. I will GET TO HIM LATER even if just briefly, he deserves his own paragraph because pumpkin daddy was the start of this all as you will now see:

Fast forward in time to July 15th, 2022. At the time had no idea that this comic existed, which makes sense. I’ve never been a huge fanfic reader nor did I have a tumblr account then, so really I had no way of knowing of its existence. But that would soon change!!! It was the last day of vacation, and instead of taking full advantage and enjoying the last remaining day I had, I was instead doing who knows what. Nah really I dunno what I was doing. Clearly I was doing…something, probably falling down some rabbit hole of random content, because I ended up stumbling across, you guessed it, Roots. Now, as I mentioned before, the original poster’s account was deactivated—same with their deviantart. Buuuuut thankfully with the way tumblr works, reblogs of posts still exist even when the original poster deactivates. So even though it was almost completely wiped, the reblogs remained. And so on that fateful day, I stumbled upon a reblog of this comic. One specific page to be exact. Just one very out of context page. And admittedly I thought nothing of it. Yeah I didn’t have some grand fascination or anything when I first stumbled across it I just saw it and thought “huh ok” and moved on. There was however one small detail that caught my attention. It only caught my attention for like a second but it was long enough to be ingrained into my memory. And for my little peanut sized monkey brain to manage to find it funny

As you will remember from what I wrote previously, while most of the characters were preexisting characters from canon, ones I could recognize easily, there was one character in this specific page I was looking at that I did Not Recognize because he was one of the original characters made to fill gaps in the plot! More specifically it was the back of his head! And nothing else! So I had no clue who this fella was! But what I DID know his that he looked like a DAMN PUMPKIN!!!!!

AHAHAHAH SEE!!!! HE LOOKS LIKE A PUMPKIN !!! SORTA!!! and I found that funny so I dubbed this mysterious figure “pumpkin daddy.” And then I stopped caring about it all immediately after. I mean sure I would occasionally remember pumpkin daddy and giggle a bit at the weird-ass pumpkin lookin’ guy, in fact I developed some lore in my head for the guy, but I couldn’t care less about the actual context behind all of it.

Fast forward once again to August of last year, 2023. By that point I’d read some fanfic, mostly to try to find the weirdest and most obscure i could, as I found those sort of fics incredibly fun (hell, me and my brother still reference some of them sometimes). looking back it’s unsurprising im such a sucker for writing crack/joke fics but anYWAY that’s useless exposition, what I’m getting at is that I absolutely adore obscure fanfics. they’re so awesome SO back to what I was saying, in August last year, I remembered pumpkin daddy’s existence. And I had the sudden thought, what the hell is up with pumpkin daddy anyway? So I figured, eh, what the heck, I’ll read the full tale of pumpkin daddy, sounds fun. Maybe I can find out the actual context behind that weird-ass pumpkin guy.

At the time I didn’t know the actual name of Roots, again I saw only a second of it and the only thing that stuck was the, as I called it verbatim, “weird pumpkin daddy” so I nicknamed it “pumpkin daddy’s book club.” I decided I would read it in October because eh, you know, pumpkins, spooky, Halloween, whatever. And so it was settled, I would find the actual comic behind this weird pumpkin daddy, and come October, I would read it. I thought nothing of it. I thought it’d take me what, a week tops, to read it all?

I was incredibly wrong in that assessment! Spoiler alert, it has been almost a full year since I started reading Roots, and I’m still not fully finished with it! You will understand why it has taken so long shortly.

So!!! I eventually combed through old tumblr blogs for hours so I could scrape up all of the pages through reblogs. It was torturous but I did manage to get all the pages of it. At least I thought so!!! I must interrupt this riveting story to mention that I was, unfortunately, mistaken in the assumption that the pages were all there. I was positive I had gotten all the pages, but what I didn’t realize at the time was that I DID NOT!!! I most definitely did not, and it took me an embarrassingly long time to realize I was wrong. If you’ll think back, I mentioned before that Roots wasn’t just posted on tumblr, but also on deviantart. A completely dead deviantart account, no archives that I could find, nothing. That comes into play because I didn’t realize at the time that, in reality, not all of the pages were posted to tumblr. There were quite a few pages that were only on deviantart for whatever reason. The deviantart was linked in the tumblr posts, but it all lead to a dead end. I didn’t realize this for, like I said, an awfully long time, especially considering just how much of an expert I touted myself (and still tout myself but perhaps this time with more merit) to be on Roots. The thing is I was desperate not to spoil anything while finding the pages initially, I was spending hours copying and pasting them into a document, I wasn’t paying attention to see if any of the posts said “the rest of this chapter is on deviantart.” How I never realized there were gaps in the story…? Chalk it up to naivety, or more accurately stupidity, I just thought it was bad writing. Oh, this plot point was never explained? How weird. Yeah it was explained actually genius!! Looking back my logic makes zero sense but eh you live and you learn. But essentially, there were quite a few pages that were, thanks to only being posted to the now-dead deviantart, completely lost media!!! Yippee!!! I will get back to this point later, but for now:

October 3rd 2023, I started reading Roots, and I’ll be honest I expected it to be absolutely horrible!! I was NOT optimistic because from the little I knew about it, it did NOT seem like my kind of story!!! Spoiler alert though, I was wrong!!! Very wrong!!! I immediately had a grand old time reading it and I spent like the next hour or two reading and analyzing the first couple pages. Like REALLY analyzing them down to the smallest of details.

And this is where an important cutoff happens, probably the most important part of all of this in fact, so pay attention!!! Aaaaa the difference between pumpkin daddy’s book club—or as I’d begun to abbreviate it, PDBC—and Roots.

What’s the difference, you may be wondering, they both refer to the same comic, don’t they? Technically that’s true but to try to explain it the best I can, PDBC was “my version,” while roots was the “actual version.” So what the hell does that mean? The prime example of that concept is pumpkin daddy himself—obviously that’s not his real name. He’s not a pumpkin. Nothing of what I assigned to “pumpkin daddy” was true of the actual character. But he was technically still that original character, just twisted beyond belief until he’s something totally different. So, essentially, pumpkin daddy was “my version” of the actual character. Get it? Probably not, but pretend you do and now picture that on a much wider scale. Everything in roots I had my own version of, the “PDBC version.” Every place, character, every slightest detail I would take and change until it was something completely different. Yall remember the briar zome? I was talking about it the other day. You probably will not be surprised the learn that there is nothing of the sort, no weird eyeball creatures, in roots. That is a pumpkin daddy thing.

I. Uh. tried to make a visual example but I think I just made it more confusing

So like. PDBC is just a horribly misshapen version of roots. technically they’re the same thing but at the same time they’re so different by a certain point that they’re not, you know? I’m not making sense lmao UH BUT YEAH it’s like. That. Tldr:

Roots and PDBC are NOT the same thing, Roots is the actual comic while PDBC is my goofy nonsense loosely based on it. When I say roots I am strictly talking about the actual comic, when I say PDBC I am strictly talking about. Well. PDBC.

Understood? Probably not!!! But screw it yall think I came here to make sense?? I’m here to just talk about things NOBODY cares about!!! YAYYYYY

So, this lasted for months. I’d read a page or two when I got the chance (you must understand I was not just READING it I was STUDYING it. Every last word and brush stroke. This is not a hobby this is a LIFESTYLE) and whilst doing so I’d use that time to develop my own version—which eventually became so different and so fun to write that I genuinely considered changing some aspects and working it into my own story. Which I probably could’ve, really—by the second month, my version was so vastly different that I sometimes forgot that things that happened in my version Did Not Happen in the actual story. Buuuut the problem was, the characters. While everything else could be, and had been, changed in my version, those original characters created for the fic were so integral to my version that even just changing their name would ruin it. And if there’s one thing I cannot do for the life of me, it’s take something that’s not mine as my own. Even if it’s just random-ass characters from a fic from 7 years ago. So I dropped the idea. Pumpkin daddy’s book club would never really come to fruition.

And I will INTERRUPT before we get to the next part of this in order to go on a tirade how much this damn comic means to me ok??? ok!!! I do not think simply going over the basic timeline of how I stumbled across Roots does it justice, I really gotta get into how much it truly means to me. This is not just a random thing I did a deep dive into this is a HYPERFIXATION. It means the WORLD to me yall have no idea. Spending the day outside reading it while simultaneously making my own story was (and still is) my favorite thing to do, like ever. And tbh at a certain point just how much happiness it brings me overrides any sense of embarrassment that this obscure comic of all things is my number one favorite thing ever. I love roots so much ok ok I mean ok listen first of all it got me out of the constant loop of being afraid of being perceived as “cringe.” At a certain point I was having too much fun writing fanfic of a fanfic and I just totally let go of any kind of internalized judgement for doing what I find fun and that was SO FREEING!!! I won’t even say that I am cringe but I am free because I’m NOT CRINGE, I’m just free!!! There is no such thing as cringe and this comic helped me realize this, because I avoided any fanfic like the plague for the longest time but then there I was having the time of my life reading one with zero regrets. Is it always perfect? no. are there parts I don’t like? yeah (COUGH COUGH THE ROMANTIC SUBPLOTS BUT THATS JUST BC I’M AROMANTIC (ALSO THAT ONE CHARACTER BUT SHE MIGHT BE REDEEMABLE I DONT KNOW BUT I ALREADY AM TOO PISSED AT HER TO EVER CARE IF I WAS MISSING IMPORTANT CONTEXT BEFOREHAND). But is it my favorite thing ever and I love it with all my heart and I always will? YEAH!!! I LOVE ROOTS/PDBC YIPPEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! it also got me back into making comics because I actually stopped genuinely working on any for a long time because I was so caught up in perfectionism and fear of being genuine in my work. But roots cured that fear of mine too!!! And now I love making comics again!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Insanity over back to what I was saying. This lasted until March of this year. Why it took so long, I ended up spending more time developing my own story than reading the actual one. Yeah uh. My version, PDBC, is a heck of a lot longer and more complicated than Roots itself at this point (theres this one whole-ass time/interdimensional theory I had to come up with just so I could make a canon explanation for a joke that I wanted to make that wouldn’t otherwise make logical sense, it is safe to say that PDBC has strayed very far from its, pardon my pun, roots) Anywaayyyyys going back to December, that’s when I realized I was missing pages—about 25 (ermm actually I found out the last 7 were missing in December, I realized a whole bunch of others were missing in early May) Obviously I was pissed off that I had spent so much time trying to gather all of it up only to realize I was missing so much of it but I gave up even attempting to find them pretty quickly.

A couple months later though, in March, I thought back to those pages. I realized just how much of roots was still a total mystery to me. The author disappeared from the internet, it seemed nobody cared to ever find those pages that were lost media—there was one Reddit thread acknowledging their existence but I don’t believe anyone ever took the time to actually find the missing pages, and if they did they didn’t archive them, at least not that I’m aware of. Could be wrong on that—and in general it was just…fascinating to me. So, with no more pages to read, I set out to uncover what the hell was up with roots, and above all else, perhaps find the missing pages (though I wasn’t very optimistic about that. like. At all. I was convinced it completely impossible)

Thankfully I had a couple of ideas on where to start. There were a couple tumblr accounts tagged in the final chapter of roots credited as helping in some way. A lot either inactive or completely deactivated, but it was a start.. I was determined above all else to get those final pages, if not just any sort of information on roots as a whole. I wasn’t particularly interested in finding the author—I mean, I think digging that deep into someone who I knew nothing about was creepy at best, so I didn’t bother looking into that.

I started with someone who would definitely be my best help. They had all the pages, at least did at a time. I knew that for a fact. But alas my luck was already out, as they were completely inactive, and had been for years. I sent a message nonetheless but I of course never got a response.

My next attempt was a bit more successful. The next person I asked responded, but they didn’t know anything. I stopped trying for a few weeks due to just general life stuff going on, I really didn’t have the energy to worry about all that. And frankly I had just given up, it all seemed pretty impossible. But I eventually pulled myself together and vowed to keep trying.

So I sent off three more messages to people who might have information. One of them never responded (once again, that account was mostly inactive), two of them did. The first to respond didn’t have the pages—they echoed my sentiment of the pages being seemingly lost to time. They did, however, point me towards the original author’s instagram.

I will not pretend that I was normal about this at all!!! I was freaking tf out, I’ll be honest. Half out of excitement that I could actually figure something out, half out of OH FUCK OH FUCK I DONT WANT TO BOTHER THIS PERSON TO ASK ABOUT SOME COMIC FROM 7 YEARS AGO OH NO NO

I did eventually calm down enough to think rationally and despite my crushing anxiety I decided that I’d worked too hard to give up the second I had an actual lead. I spent the next couple days preparing myself mentally—and reading the author’s current work, which is actually REALLY really good like dang I immediately became invested in it—and I eventually sent off a message. A message filled with barely disguised fangirling and incessant apologizing for being annoying but uh. It was a message! And wouldn’t you know it by some miracle I got a response back

NOOOW aside from the basic art and writing advice they gave me and other such words of wisdom that I will forever cherish, the most important things that happened during that correspondence was that, for whatever reason, the original creator gave me full permission to do whatever I wanted with the characters they made for roots. This came totally out of left field, I didn’t think I implied in the slightest that I desperately wanted full ownership of their characters (though deep down I did) and yet when I mentioned how much I liked the characters they were just like “oh yeah you can use them, do whatever you want with them theyre all yours.” I was BEYOND ecstatic (putting it mildly, I nearly broke my headphones when I read the message because I tripped and dropped them into a deep mud puddle out of shock lmao). The only thing that was stopping me from writing my version in full was that I couldn’t change the characters, and in an instant, without even asking, I got full permission to do whatever I wanted. With their full support, too, they were glad that someone was giving their old characters a fresh start. Which is completely insane to me??? But I’m not complaining I am incredibly happy about it to this day and I am the proud “owner” of these silly little characters and I can do whatever I want with them heehehehoohoo I have infinite power

But back to the main point, they did send me all of the missing pages. There were 25 I believe. And so finally, after months of trying, I had gotten all of the pages. They all are in one file so now I don’t have to scroll for hours through defunct tumblr blogs to scrounge them all up. And look I know it’s such a small thing and really nobody cares about it but I am SO PROUD of myself for finding the lost pages, I love lost media stories so much and it is SO cool to me that I managed to find some lost media, even if it was only partially lost and nobody else was looking for it. It’s cool to ME and that’s all that matters, this is my crowning achievement in life. At least I think I’m the only one who ever cared enough to find them, you never know. I don’t actually know if anyone is looking for the lost pages actually, I feel like it’s all been pretty forgotten about which is a shame. But nevertheless if somehow someone out there is ever looking for the entirety of Roots, then I will be hailed as a lost media HERO and I will be expecting a 5 hour youtube documentary with spooky music in the background in my honor. The whole process of finding the lost pages was a lot more complicated than that, but I’m talking enough already, you do noooot need to hear about the real big steaks, shrek 2, the pikmin 2 boss intro theme, all that good stuff.

So! Pikmin!!! yup this actually ties into pikmin stuff. During the time I was trying to get the missing pages, I passed the time by playing pikmin!!! That’s actually how I got into pikmin, I probably wouldn’t have played it otherwise. So without roots I would not be the pikmin-obsessed fool I am today. And therefore I wouldn’t even have this blog. Which, fun fact, I also started solely to pass the time while waiting to find the pages! There’s some more lore behind this blog heehehehehehe. Pumpkin daddy. His name is not actually pumpkin daddy. Obviously. His actual name is Finch!!! Woah!!! sounds familiar doesn’t it??? Wonder where you’ve heard that before!!!

This blogs mere existence, not just my posts to it, is actually thanks to roots as well. Yeeees it’s Hana bobo finch lore time!! I believe I’ve mentioned in the past that this blog’s name is based on a dream I had—and if I didn’t well, yeah, this blog’s name is based on a dream I had. To be more specific, this blog’s grand origin story is that back in December I dreamt that there was a conspiracy theory called the “Hana bobo finch” conspiracy. I remember nothing more about it except for the name and that, in my dream, there was a huge online discussion on this conspiracy. And so, finding the dream to be funny, I recreated what one of the conspiracy pages in my dream looked like to the best of my abilities. And I actually

I have a screenshot of it from the time so here it is

yyyup this was this here blog right after its creation. Don’t ask about the spider monkey pfp that’s a long story and this is long enough already. I still haven’t remembered what the Hana bobo finch conspiracy actually meant in my dream. Maybe the real conspiracy was the friends we made along the way

Also as I said before pumpkin daddy is my favorite character and holy crap could I go into a whole new rant about pumpkin daddy aka finch but I will spare you. You will be thankful that I am sparing you he is SO funny like he’s my favorite character ever he’s such an asshole LMAO he sucks so bad and he’s so funny for no reason I just oughhh yall got no idea you all have no idea ooooooo he is such a terrible person but he does it in the funniest way possible and I truly just can not explain any of it. I believe the best way I can summarize him without making this more confusing than it already is, is that while talking with the author I made them a comic where ol’ pumpkin daddy aka finch gets so fucking mad that nobody wants to come to his cookouts because his cooking sucks that he plans to (assumedly) kill everyone, and the author themself said it was remarkably in character. so. do with that what you will FINCH MY BELOVED OOOUGHHHH. FFINCG UUGHH LOVE HIM

So what’s the point in this entire rant? It is quite simple:

1: I really want to yap

2: I will moooooost likely be yapping abt PDBC soon cause I love it w aaaaall my heart, but it’s real hard to explain it without thousands of words of the backstory to it. soooo yup, here is the backstory. You may or may not be bombarded with PDBC stuff soon. We will see if I have the guts to do so but I’ve already posted abt some of my ocs so…why not post about everything? (OMINOUS) (THIS IS A WARNING) (IT WAS A BAD IDEA TO ENCOURAGE ME I’M ABOUT TO NEVER STOP TALKING)

n e wayz here’s the FUNNIEST FUCKING PANEL from all 167 pages of Roots (and fun fact, one of the ones that was almost lost media! Can’t believe this masterpiece almost was lost to time smh

HE’S SIZZLING SOMEONE GET HIM DOWN‼️

AHAHAHA YEAHhhhhHHHH THAT RIGHT THERE IS PUMPKIN DADDY UP THERE EHEHEHEHEH don’t let him down he’s a menace to society

I love this comic so fuckin much I have so much fun reading it and it inspired me to make my own goofy little comics and stuff (UNSURPRISINGLY IT INSPIRED ME TO MAKE HORN STROBE) and it is so funny I quote it so much you have no idea (UNSURPRISINGLY I HAVE QUOTED IT ONCE IN HORN STROBE) and ooooughh guys. Guys this is what you are signing up for when you are my mutual. This is what you have to put up with. I have so much more I could say but I am actively restraining myself because I realize that nobody wants to read 4.5k+ words of this nonsense (tho if you have reached this point you already have, congratulations). though I will still in the future yap about PDBC because I have not spent the past almost full year now making some stupid little story just for me to not yap about it in any way, alright? I can do whatever I want with the characters I’m not gonna squander this opportunity oooooooooouyghhn guys please ask me about this stuff I need to talk I need to talk I need to talk guys at least pretend to care so I can talk just a little bit I need to be insane on main guys please. GUYS PLEASE. roots my beloved roots my beloved roots my beloved I’m probably not making sense roots my beloved I love roots so much

[genuine-wrestleboy]

freeze or fawn (2/2)

words: 4,110

hey, god! if ao3 going down right as i finished this was meant to be you trying to tell me something, i am simply not listening <3

(on ao3)

You watch your mug spin in the microwave, the day-old coffee inside steaming to gelatinous perfection. There’s a sort of ridiculous camaraderie to it; you watch the coffee, and in the reflection in the glass door, Springtrap watches you. You can feel the cold intensity of his gaze, gooseflesh on the back of your neck.

The microwave whirs on, and you pick nervously at your cuticles.

“Thirty years is a long time,” you say, mostly just to fill the silence.

“It's a very long time,” he confirms dryly.

“And what is remnant, exactly?”

He sighs. “That explanation would also be very long, and I doubt you would even understand most of what I could tell you.”

“Try me,” you offer.

“Later,” he says firmly. “Are you quite done yet?”

“Almost,” you tell him, “I just, hold on—”

You cancel the rest of the time and grab for the mug, burning your fingers a little and half-dropping it onto the countertop with a quiet “ow, fuck". You don't even want to consider what the reaction would be if you started pulling out pans to cook a proper breakfast, so you fish a box of cereal out of the cupboard and resign yourself to eating it dry.

Something occurs to you, and you turn to Springtrap, tucking the box under your arm.

“Do you want anything? Can you, like, eat? Other than, uh—” You clear your throat. “—you know.”

You watch the change in his posture as the implication of your words sinks in. He pinches two fingers against the bridge of his muzzle, like he’s staving off a headache.

“I liked it better when you were afraid of me.”

You laugh a little deliriously, because you can’t not. Does he really think you're not still afraid of him? You’re terrified, but, well. He’d just eaten you out on your aunt’s kitchen floor, you thought maybe you could establish a rapport.

It’s just impossible to get a read on him, is the thing, to know where your bearings lie. All that threatening anger and violence, and then he’ll catch you off-guard with these stunning little moments of gentleness, of kindness or comfort or affection. Brief little pops of warmth that pass as quickly as they come and leave you stumbling after him for more, your adrenaline on a wildly oscillating loop. No safe place to land, to rest long enough to recalibrate.

“Sorry, I’m still a little—” You make a vague, waving gesture near your head. “I thought you were gonna kill me, so. Taking a while to adjust.”

“I may well still kill you,” he tells you without heat.

“I—okay." How are you supposed to respond to that? “I’d rather you didn’t, for what it’s worth.”

He makes a sort of shrugging gesture. “As for your question, I don't believe I am capable of digestion in my current state, no.”

That doesn’t surprise you, you guess. From your cursory, stolen glimpses you’d be surprised if there was enough left of his digestive tract left intact to begin with, never mind how any of it would still be functional. Honestly now that you’re thinking about it you could probably say the same of anything under that suit—only, you’ve definitely heard him breathe, haven’t you? Did his lungs somehow miraculously escape the damage that befell the rest of him? Does he need to breathe? He’s not constantly bleeding out, so you assume whatever blood might be left in there isn’t actively circulating, but you can’t do it with any real confidence.

On that note, though, does it even matter? You don't understand how he's still upright at all, you can't even begin to guess the rules his body might follow now. If it’s—whether it’s all still connected, or if it should work, does that count for anything one way or the other? And if it doesn't, or if it is, could he—

Oh, no, no, are you insane? You're absolutely not thinking about that right now, you are shutting that line of speculation down immediately.

“You’re ready now, I take it?”

You startle, feeling caught, grab your coffee and nod. Just gonna…let all of that go, for now, then.

 "Yep. What are we looking for?"

"Tools." He's entrusted your superior knowledge of the house's layout with tracking down what he cagily referred to as 'necessary supplies'. "A toolkit, if there's one to be had, but I can make do with a screwdriver and my wits, if needs must."

Your mood soars; you've got good news for him.

"I don’t think they’ll must,” you say. "I’m pretty sure I remember seeing all my uncle's old tools in the garage when I parked yesterday. Not that I doubt your wits,” you add, and the absurdity of attempting to flirt with someone who has expressed a passing interest in your death isn’t lost on you.

Springtrap stills like you’ve surprised him, looks you up and down.

“Well, then. In that case it seems like the least I can do not to doubt your memory, hm?"

That's a risk at the best of times, but thankfully, this time, your memory does comes through for you; you flick on the yellowy garage lights to reveal a sturdy black workbench pushed into the far corner, collecting dust beneath neatly organized rows of hammers, wrenches, pliers, and a few very specific-looking tools you don't recognize that hang from a pegboard bolted to the wall. Excitement and relief fizz through your veins, and you turn to Springtrap with a grin.

“Will this work?” You’re angling for a sign of approval, and it’s probably painfully obvious.

He scans the room and laughs, not entirely kindly. You flinch a little when he reaches out, but it's almost reverent when he takes your face in one huge hand, strokes a thumb along your cheek.

“Well done,” he says with feeling.

You had absolutely no hand in acquiring any of the tools in question, and even less in making sure that they stayed around for him to find, but fuck if the praise doesn’t get under your skin and flood straight down.

“Happy to help,” you reply weakly.

He taps you slyly under the chin. “That’s the spirit. Come along.”

You follow him down into the garage, edging around the nose of your car. Leave, comes the thought, sudden and unbidden, get in the car and get the fuck out of there, but how would you even do that? Even if you wanted to leave, your keys are in the house, and anyway Springtrap needs you—he told you that he does, sort of.

Maybe he’d find you again, your brain suggests, and you think about that hand on your face, that glow of praise, pressing your own palm against your cheek as you feel heat rising into it. This is not the time, you tell yourself firmly, to say nothing of whether or not there should ever be a time at all, but it doesn’t do much to relieve the nebulous desire reforming in your belly.

By the bench, Springtrap fiddles with the latch of a dented red toolbox. You’ve noticed before, but he seems to have trouble with movements that require any higher degree of fine motor control in his hands. He is also very clearly irritated by this fact, so you keep this observation to yourself. Eventually he lets out a snarl and rips the latch off the box altogether, chucking it over his shoulder to vanish into the nooks and crannies of the garage.

“May as well make yourself comfortable,” he tells you, leaning in to examine the newly revealed contents, “I imagine we’ll be here for quite a while.”

“Aye aye.” Carefully balancing your mug by the wipers, you hoist yourself up onto the hood of your car, pressing your legs together self-consciously. For a while you just sit there, sipping the now-lukewarm coffee and picking at your cereal, watching Springtrap work. He peels back a section of matted fur to expose the joint of his wrist, measures out an inch of a clear liquid, and dips the corner of a rag into it. The cloth turns black with the grime of years, blood and rust and who knows what else as he rubs it into the protesting metal. When he’s satisfied, he sets it aside and positions the head of a screwdriver against a screw you can’t quite see, and then adjusts the whole limb under the lamp clamped to the bench, out of your view completely.

Fascinating though the process promises to be, you’re pretty sure you’d only be in the way if you ask him to move so you can watch what he’s doing. You lean back against the windshield instead, and exhaustion crashes into you the instant you’re in something resembling a reclined position. It’s been a long morning, and the caffeine you just ingested hasn’t begun to work its magic quite yet. Plus, your night on the sofa hadn’t exactly been a restful one. You’ve been running on nothing but adrenaline for hours now; sleep, when it comes, hits you fast and hard.

You wake with your neck at an angle that barely feels survivable, flooded with impotent panic from a nightmare you barely remember. The back of your head smacks against the glass of the windshield as you jolt back into consciousness, and you cradle it gingerly in one hand, pulling yourself upright.

Springtrap looks over from where he’s leaning against the workbench, fighting something at his hip with a pair of needle-nose pliers.

“You fell asleep.” It isn’t anger, but there’s something odd in his voice that prickles along your skin like being too close to a fire.

“Sorry.” You have no idea why you’re apologizing. “I didn’t realize I was so tired.”

He tilts his head to one side, eyes flat and sharp in a way that sparks a cold, guttering fear in your chest.

“I could’ve done anything to you,” he informs you, still with that strange, keen edge to it.

“Sorry,” you say again, because you’re not sure what else to say. “Did—can I help at all?”

Backlit by the bench lamp, his unchanging smile seems to grow in shadow, longer, hungrier.

“If you’re offering.” He twists his wrist, and a section of suit paneling by his pelvis comes loose and swings open. “Come here, give me your hand.”

You maneuver your way back to the floor, careful to avoid upsetting the remnants of your makeshift breakfast. You do want to help, to be useful to him, but placing your hand in his feels like putting it in the mouth of a lion and trusting it not to bite.

Laughing softly, Springtrap reels you closer, muzzle butting your face as he takes several hot, gulping breaths against your skin. His other hand abandons the pliers to press at the small of your back, fingertips biting through the fabric of your shirt.

“You smell afraid.” He says it like an endearment.

“I—” you stammer, “I'm—oh, oh.”

Your line of thinking stalls hard, that rising tide of fear dissolving in the wake of the long, low groan that all but pours out of him as he guides your hand to his cock. Shock, bitten-back and swallowed, the simmering desire in you rising like a white-water tide. Your knees tremble traitorously beneath you.

"Is something wrong?” he purrs. “I thought you wanted to help."

“I do,” you say breathlessly. His hand at your back feels like the only thing that’s holding you upright.

Springtrap’s fingers fold over yours, inhuman and irresistible, and he growls into the crook of your neck as he pumps himself lazily with your fist.

“So help.”

Well, you suppose, there's that question answered, at least. 

He feels huge in your hand, only half-hard and already too thick for you to get your fingers all the way around. Your pulse pounds in your ears, between your legs, in the palm of your hand. Springtrap shifts forward as you move experimentally, twisting your wrist to cover as much of his shaft as you can.

“Harder,” he hisses encouragingly. “My nerve endings aren’t what they used to be, you know.”

It shouldn't be sexy, that reminder, but he runs a claw up your spine as he says it, little sparks along a willing fuse, and you shiver and tighten your grip until his hips stutter forward and he lets out a loose, throaty moan.

"There you are, darling. Just like that."

The endearment makes a molten mess of your insides, all the blood in your body rushing downwards so quickly that it makes you dizzy. You're still wet from earlier, and between that headstart and the way Springtrap's cock twitches in your hand, you're mortifyingly close to leaking down your own leg like you're in heat.

As if noticing, Springtrap presses a merciful knee between yours, chuckling when you immediately begin to grind against his thigh. The suit catches and pinches at your shorts, your skin, but that matters far less than the welcome pressure against your clit.

"You want my cock that badly?" He catches your chin in his hand, pressing his fingers into your cheeks until your mouth drops open. It's all you can do to nod in response, bearing down against his thigh as you work him with long, sloppy strokes. You imagine that girth on your tongue, heavy and hot, and you feel your mouth start to water, drool pooling hungrily in its stead. 

"Filthy," Springtrap murmurs against your hair, his tone warm with dark approval that throbs between your legs.

"Please," you try to say, or "yes" or "god", but it comes out a needy, open-mouthed mishmash of sound, wordless and hoarse. Pleasure builds like syrup, thick and slow, hips and hand rocking at the same mindless, driving rhythm. You can feel the wet spot you’re leaving on his fur, clutching at his arm to keep your balance as your legs start to shake. You feel—god, you feel empty.

Metal screeches and smashes to the floor as Springtrap clears the workbench with one swift swipe of his arm. You jump back, startled, swallowing a frustrated whine at the interruption.

Reaching out, he drags a claw slowly, slowly along the line of your throat, and when he speaks, his voice is calm, but brittle, fast-flowing water under very thin ice.

“Normally, I would take my time with this, but I’m understandably a bit pent up, so if you wouldn’t mind.” He pats the surface of the bench expectantly.

Heat floods your face when you realize what he’s asking, eager anticipation buzzing in your blood. You move to obey; he catches you by the waistband of your shorts.

"Take these off," he says. "Quickly, before I tear them off you."

Oh, you are not opposed to that idea, at all,  actually. Your eyes flick up to his, breath catching, and your expression must give you away, because his grip on you tightens, and he laughs, low and amused.

"I might’ve guessed."

 The fabric of your shorts pulls apart like paper. Even though you know it’s coming, it still startles a cry out of you. Springtrap crowds you back against the workbench, hands bracketing your hips and moving upwards. Your shirt rucks up around his wrists, and he dips his head to nuzzle against your temple with a pleased hum.

“This too,” he says, which is all the warning you get before your shirt goes the same way. Your skin, newly bare, fever hot, prickles in the cool air of the garage, and for a moment you feel like you should cover yourself with your hands.

Then Springtrap hitches you up and drops you onto the bench, fingers divoting your thighs as he pulls your hips flush together. Your head falls back, and you bite out a soft moan as the full length of him slides against you, slick with your arousal. He feels even bigger between your legs than he had in your hand.

“Look at me.” It’s clear from his voice that he’s trying very, very hard to hold himself together.

You look. His eyes burn at you, at this angle almost mirrored. The visible muscles of his neck tense, shoulders taut as he draws himself over you and stills. Beneath that gaze, the broad shadow of his body, you feel cracked open and bare, something soft and helpless shucked from a shell. He rolls his hips forward once, twice, and a shudder goes through you.

“Tell me you want this.”

Without meaning to, your eyes fall, pulled to where his cock parts your folds. His skin is the same mottled purple here as everywhere else, blotchy and dark, and the fluid that leaks from the tip is cloudy and pungent and thick. You imagine it pressing into you, and the ache of desire is almost matched by a sudden, urgent fear. Your words stick in your throat, and he tilts his head to the side, sneering.

"Don't play coy with me now, you were gagging for it a moment ago."

That does something twisting and strange to your stomach. You don’t want him to stop, but you realize you don't entirely believe that he would if you asked him to.

"I want it," you say weakly, then surer, "I want it."

He leans even closer, forcing your legs apart until it edges on painful, lowering his face as if he's about to kiss you.

"What do you want?" Sweet as spun sugar in his terrible wreck of a voice.

You whimper, rocking your hips upwards desperately. “I want—hn!—I want your cock, I want—please, I want it so badly.”

Springtrap touches your cheek with his fingertips, feather-light and fond. He shifts back, and you feel the blunt, solid pressure of him at your entrance, barely enough to tease, and it's already so much and nowhere near enough, you need, you need—

“Go on, then. Beg for it."

You think you could come like this, untouched, to nothing but the sound of his voice.

You would really, really prefer to be touched, though.

"Please," you sob breathlessly. Your cunt clenches on empty air. “Please, god, please fuck me, I’ll do any—anything, please, I need you inside me, please, please.”

Springtrap’s teeth glint behind the mask.

“Now what man could resist, when you ask like that?”

A brief burst of pain, and then gutted, boneless pleasure; you clutch at his shoulders as he fucks you open, needy, gasping moans shallowing your lungs. The slow stretch floods you with warmth until you're drunk with it, liquid and loose. Heavy, hazy heat, the contents of your skull bleeding soupily together, your whole world nothing but that hungry, spreading fullness. Your body, reshaping itself to fit him.

"Fuck, you're so big." The thought tumbles out as it occurs to you, and Springtrap snarls and hilts himself in one harsh, sudden motion, muzzle pressed so tightly to your neck that it bites into your skin.

You suck in a breath through clenched teeth. It's just the wrong side of too much, too fast, but he gives you no time to recover before he starts moving again. Both paws dig a constellation of bruises into your hips as he pins you to the bench, skin slapping yours as he bottoms out on every thrust. You feel shattered, cracked apart, bleeding light into his palms. He sets a brutal pace, driving into your eager cunt with untiring speed until you’re mewling beneath him, overwhelmed with sensation as discomfort cedes again to building sweetness.

"That's right,” he coos. “You'll take it for me, won't you?"

You gasp, nodding through shocks of pleasure. “Yes, yes, please.”

“Yes, yes,” he mimics, teasing—then lower, as you arch up to meet him, “yes.”

That rough syllable echoes in the cage of your ribs. Springtrap rolls his hips forward, deliberate and slow, rutting blissful friction against your neglected clit. A thin, keening sound falls from your lips, and you hook your ankles around his back, closer closer closer like the twin of your rabbiting heartbeat.

Breath rumbling low in his throat, Springtrap curves forward, pulling your hips off the bench entirely. The new angle draws him in impossibly deep, and his cock brushes something that sings bone-deep through you, your whole body fizzling like a live spark. You grasp for purchase around his neck, and his even rhythm falters and fails.

“Please don’t stop,” you beg, canting your hips desperately upwards.

Springtrap bites down hard against your shoulder, pulling out nearly all the way before slamming hungrily back into you. The force of it wrings a hoarse moan from your lungs and shoves the whole workbench back a screeching inch. You wonder distantly if you’ll be able to walk after this. 

“Oh, darling,” he chuckles. “That was never an option.”

You feel yourself clench around him, and Springtrap groans, hips stuttering. He moves against you, picking up speed, breath ragged and hot against the crook of your neck. Higher and higher, rushing pleasure climbs your spine like the swell of a wave as he fucks you full of helium and heat, of him and him and him, until it feels like there’s no room in you for anything else.

“So tight for me,” he growls, voice rough. “Only for me.”

“God,” you whimper. Maybe part of you wants to protest the possessive words, but most of you is busy feeling like you're about to burst out of your own skin.

“You like that thought, do you?” he asks, and you nod frantically. 

"I—ah!—yes." You're close, you're so fucking close—

Springtrap grinds into you, steady, unrelenting pressure, building and building without relief. He lets out a harsh breath by your ear, but his voice is soft and confiding when he speaks, like he's sharing a secret.

"I'm going to ruin you for anyone else."

He doesn't even slow as you come, howling, around him, fucking you through the aftershocks at that same merciless pace until you’re trembling and spent. You feel like you’ve been split apart and thrown in a thousand different directions, like it’s only his hands on your skin keeping you together. Weakly, you take his face in your hands and kiss the ruined nose, the corner of his grinning mouth; he turns to butt his muzzle against you with a sound somewhere between a snarl and a sob.

“Take it,” he hisses, and understanding hits you a beat too late.

“Wait—” you manage limply; Springtrap laughs like nearing thunder.

"Shhhh. Whatever I want, remember?"

You sob a feeble “fuck” as his hips hit yours, and your cunt fills with spurts of warmth. It's a foreign, electric feeling, and you rock against him mindlessly, the last of your breath escaping you in a weak, panting moan. His cock twitches and throbs, emptying into you as you shudder in his arms, held up easy as a doll. The sound you make would be mortifying, if you had a single brain cell to spare for it.

Springtrap pulls out just as pleasure edges into overstimulation. You wince at the strangeness of the feeling as he sets you down, the soreness already blooming, the sticky wetness that seeps out to pool on the bench beneath you. A huge hand palms high up on your thigh, the gaze behind it lazy and appraising. Then two fingers stroke a line from your ass to your entrance, and you let out a hiss of discomfort as they press a generous amount of come back inside you.

“What a mess,” tsks Springtrap, presenting the fingers to you. You open your mouth dutifully, but he seems to change his mind, instead wiping his soiled hand ineffectually against your leg. “You really ought to get yourself cleaned up. There’s still work to do, after all.”

You don’t know why you’re surprised, it’s the same one-eighty he pulled on you last time, already back to business while your brain is still leaking out of your ears. You let out a frustrated huff, and he tilts his head to the side, eyes glittering curiously.

“I—would you, just, like, come here a second? Please.”

He pauses at your request, then hovers closer, and you have to close your eyes against the bright scalpel-blade of his gaze. The new smells of hot metal and grease sit thick over the smoke and decay, stinging your nose as you bury your face against his shoulder and take a deep breath. You wet your lips; they taste like blood.

After a moment, you feel Springtrap wrap an arm around your waist, then your shoulders. If you lean into it just so, it even feels like an embrace.

[danvillecheese]

why do u think act ur age is fucked

[cracks knuckles] alright. essay time. you asked for it.

I’ve done a similar response to this before here and mentioned something else about it here but I’ll go over it again since those posts are both from a while ago. also bear in mind I haven’t seen aya recently bc I don’t like it. okay let’s get into it

[also im gonna preface this saying maybe i sound very pessimistic but im ranting and its just gonna sound like im complaining because i am. i mean no real malice by the way. im simply a person with a blog.]

first off. they don’t use the show don’t tell as well as they could. in the what might have been montage, sure, they showed potential scenarios and how phineas felt (very briefly) when isa stopped visiting his backyard but it just feels so rushed. I get that they only had like 11 minutes to show it but idk there has to be another way to write it. or just not have it at all idk its just from a writing point of view the whole episode feels rushed and out of place from everything else continuity-wise. why not use little easter eggs planted in the show beforehand? operation crumbcake? pharmacists? meapless in seattle? god theres so many episodes with evidence that phineas liked her back even if he didnt know. just. continuity!!!!

second. why did their friends not try something sooner. it’s not like they didn’t know. like phineas seems to be okay with saying “i wish! i am so in the friend zone there” in front of his friends (that quote alone makes me lose my shit but that’s a whole other point) so clearly they knew about phineas. and isabella also wasn’t quiet about it (source: pnf s1-4). they had like four years of high school to do something and they planned it the day isa left for college? nah its just the least realistic thing ever for me. also them being 18 is like yeah okay maybe the slow burn was worth it and theyre way more grown up (i love a good slowburn) but ohhhhhh my god SURELY their friends were getting sick of them dancing around each other. just me?

third. and I’m sorry to ash simpson but oh my god I hate the character designs like They Would Not Fucking Look Like That. it almost feels like it completely disregards their arcs during the original summer. like yeah child chub disappears over ur teen years but sometimes it stays a little longer! make phineas less twiggy!! make isa look more like her mother! (am i about to redesign them again? whoops)

four. and i know this is no fault of dan and swampy but the show was about to end anyways and yet the entire friend group was paired off into hetero ships?? get fucking real. none of those kids are straight. realistically, i know it was a different time and gay marriage wasnt even legal in the us yet so it wasnt all that common to have queer romance on screen let alone on disney channel but like i said, the show was about to end. what were the disney channel execs gonna do? cancel it? lmao

five. "I am so in the friend zone there." "we are guys. we do not talk about our feelings." WHAT!!! i cant believe this shit is real. these lines of dialogue are canon. what the hell. what kind of message does that even send to younger, impressionable viewers? if ur a 10 year old boy watching that (ok fine maybe that isnt gonna stick with you forever but listen) and you go 'oh its okay to just bottle everything up and not tell my friends about my feelings about anything ever' that is insane! thats not how things should go!! like i get the whole "im so in the friend zone" and yes, this also has to do with the era but like if they wanted to be a more progressive cartoon that kids look up to and enjoy maybe they just. shouldn't have put that whole conversation in.

i barely have any problems with the b plot. in fact id watch the episode just for the kazoo solo. because that plot lines up with the continuity. i can totally see heinz having bowling night with perry and carl and monogram every week! i can totally see perry and monogram retired! and carl running owca and getting payed for it! that all checks out! that one makes sense and works with the canon! if they got that plot so right how did they get the a plot so wrong?

i can answer this question: fanservice. its an awful word, i know. act your age is a fanservicey episode which is why i think it crashed and burned. mml season 2 is rooted in the same issue: doof is very present and takes away from the original plot of the show. like, the one he wasnt even in until the last episode of s1. slightly getting off topic but it is the crux of the issue. fanservice doesnt make for good storytelling. even if it brings in the big bucks. at its core, telling the story the way it should be told is the best one. even if it pisses people off. a good portion of the viewers will still appreciate whatever ending the creators come up with. and no, im not saying phinbella shouldn't have become canon, in fact i really like the ship and all their dynamics, i just think they went about it the wrong way.

as someone who's written and published fic about them getting together in different universes (granted, they were from when i was younger so its mildly terrible. take them with a grain of salt) there are a lot of other ways to tell that story canonically. honestly, i think the best way of doing it was to keep it ambiguous. dont tell that story. let the viewers pick their own ending for phineas and isabella. maybe they dont get together after all. who knows!

thanks for the ask! hope you had fun getting lectured <3

[demi-rxndxm-stxff]

Some DigitalTime Incorrect Quotes

Colin: Since we're in a relationship now, your clothes are my clothes too. Don't ask me why I have your shirt on, this is our shirt. Tony: Fine, but when I come strutting in with your fuzzy socks I don't want to hear shit.

Tony: My future partner must be brave, strong, intelligent, successful and organized. Colin: steps on a caterpillar and proceeds to drop to their knees and sob while apologizing profusely Tony: That one. I want that one.

Tony: BE A BETTER PERSON! Colin: WHY?! Tony: BECAUSE SOMEONE NEEDS TO HAVE MORALS IN THIS RELATIONSHIP, AND IT SURE AS FUCK AIN'T GONNA BE ME, SWEETHEART! (Only added this one cause it was too damn funny)

Colin: We both look very handsome tonight. Tony: You know, if you'd just said that I looked handsome, I would have said, "So do you." Colin: I couldn't take that chance.

Tony: Okay, I’m going to get the wedding cake. Colin: Perfect, while you do that I’ll check on the ring bear. Tony: … Tony: You mean ring bearER, right? Colin: … Tony: Look me in the eyes and tell me you are not going to bring a dangerous wild animal to our wedding.

Colin: Two bros! Colin: Chillin' in a hot tub! Colin: Zero feet apart 'cause we're GAY AS FUCK!

Colin: Hey, about that love letter you sent me- Tony: blushes What are your thoughts? Colin: The fourth sentence- Tony: Yeah, that’s where I got really emotional and I- Colin: It’s “you’re” not “your”.

Colin: I don't need to go to bed. I'm not tired, I'll be fine. Tony: But, darling, I'll be so lonely without you. Come curl up in my arms so I can feel whole again. Colin: O-oh. Well. Are you trying to seduce me into healthy sleeping patterns?? Tony: Is it working?

Tony: Do you want to explain the text you sent me last night? Colin: It was autocorrect. Tony: Autocorrect wrote "You're so hot. Please step on me."? Colin: Yes.

Tony: I’ve been dropping them the most insanely obvious hints for like a year now. No response. Colin: Wow. They sound stupid. Tony: But they’re not. They’re really smart actually. Just dense. Colin: Maybe you need to be more obvious? Like, I don’t know… “Hey! I love you!” Tony: I guess you’re right. Hey Colin, I love you. Colin: See! Just say that! Tony: Holy fucking shit. Colin: If that flies over their head then, sorry Tony, but they're too dumb for you. Tony: Colin.

Colin: Okay, but if your not gay then why are you always holding my hand and kissing me and telling me I’m your boyfriend? Tony: Colin- Its satire! Colin: THAT'S NOT WHAT SATIRE MEANS!

Tony: I still have no idea how I’m attracted to you… Colin: Yeah, well, you’re stuck with me, and no take backs, honey.

Tony: You have to apologize to them Colin. Colin: Fine! But I must warn you that this might make me a better, nicer person and that is NOT the person you fell in love with!

Colin: Tony and I are no longer dating. Tony: Colin, that’s a horrible way of telling people we’re married.

Tony: I’m in love with you. Colin: We called off the prank war last night at midnight, dork. Tony: I know. Colin: Ah. Okay. Um. Cool. Neat. Very cool. Cool. Cool. Coolcoolcool-

Colin: I'm trash. Tony: As someone who's environmentally conscious, it's my duty to pick you up. Does 7 work for you? Colin: Colin: You smooth motherfucker. Colin: And yes it does.

Colin: Relationships should be 50/50. Tony cooks us dinner while I sit on the kitchen counter looking pretty.

Tony: Are we fighting or flirting? Colin: I'm pinning you against a wall with my hand around your neck- Tony: Your point?

Colin: So you like cats? Tony: Yeah. Colin: tries to impress them by slowly pushing a glass off the table

Colin: seductively takes off glasses Colin: Wow… Tony: blushes Haha… what? Colin: You're really fucking blurry.

Tony: I think I just figured something out. I got to go. Colin: Aren't you forgetting something? Tony: Uuh…hesitantly kisses Colin's forehead before running out. Colin: No, pay your bill! Damn, who raised you?

Colin: The stars are so beautiful… Tony: They're just giant balls of gas. Colin: You know what, if you're just going to ruin this, then- Tony: And yet none of them are as huge as my love for you. Colin: Oh…

Colin: I want to wake up with you every day for the rest of our lives. Tony: I wake up at 4:30 AM every day to train. Colin: I want to see you at some point every day for the rest of our lives.

[gamerwoo]

hansol/mingyu: the lovers playlist

characters: mingyu x female reader (mentions of hansol x female reader)

genre/warnings: idol au, friends to ????, one-sided pining, a smidge of angst but mostly fluff, mingyu is so stupidly in love it’s insane, a lot of time skips with no mention of how much time has skipped lmao i’m so sorry

word count: 3,248

summary: so i’ll just tell my telephone all of the above when i’m alone

a/n: things in bold italics are song lyrics

previous song | next song | back to playlist

“Do you ever hear a song that you forgot existed and you just know it’ll be on repeat for the next two weeks?”

Mingyu gave you a strange look, sitting across from you at a table at some burger joint the two of you pulled into. Actually, it was your idea. You reached out to him, and he was kind of shocked.

i’m keeping the promise 😋, was what your text read when you asked him to grab lunch.

Honestly, he wasn’t confused by your question -- he saw the way you sat up straighter when the beat kicked in, like you were trying to get closer to the speakers in the ceiling to listen to the music -- but more so confused by why you would listen to only one song for so long.

“You have no idea what I’m talking about,” you realized with a laugh as you saw his eyebrows knit together, looking like a confused puppy.

“I’m trying to,” he promised with a chuckle.

Despite not getting your need to play one song over and over again even after you tried to explain, like the lovesick simp he was, he found that exact song and played it on repeat for you whenever he saw you.

-

I’d like to know your middle name; Let’s talk about your parents and your future dreams.

“You did this on purpose.”

Your playful glare was on Mingyu, who merely grinned proudly and announced, “Yup!”

“You said you didn’t get it,” you reminded him.

He shrugged, “That’s okay. I don’t need to get it to listen to it.”

“You’re gonna keep it on replay?” you scoffed.

“Why not?”

As if he didn’t listen to it alone at home until he knew what the lyrics were.

“So, _____,” he continued as he stretched out comfortably on your bed, arms going behind his head as he laid back on the headboard, “why don’t you tell me about your middle name and your parents?”

You gave him a look that was something along the lines of an annoyed ‘are you serious?’ or a ‘shut the fuck up’ with a small eye roll, but you shifted at the other end of your bed and replied nonetheless.

“When did you become an English major?”

“If I’m gonna listen to this song a billion times with you, I may as well know what it’s about,” he stated in a ‘duh’ tone.

Very good save, he told himself, It’s not because I’m in love with you or anything.

After another, more dramatic eye roll, you replied, “You don’t need to know my full name, and my parents are a teacher and a vet tech who live in some tiny town and own a tiny yappy dog to replace me while I’m gone.”

“Yeah, you’re basically the same thing,” he deadpanned.

You grabbed your stuffed bear that had ended up on the floor when you and Mingyu climbed onto the bed, and threw it at him. He let out a loud laugh as he held up his hands so he didn’t have to take it to the face.

“Do I at least get to know the dog’s name?” he asked, still laughing.

“Molly.”

“So you’ll tell me your dog’s name but not your middle name?” he sighed, feigning sadness.

“You don’t actually care,” you scoffed, “you’re just trying to be a smartass.”

“I do care!” he insisted, looking straight at you so you would know he wasn’t joking or lying.

You didn’t know that Mingyu actually did want to know everything about you.

After a few seconds of just studying him, you sighed and relented.

Mingyu’s smile slowly grew when you told him, testing your first and middle names on his tongue. He liked how it flowed. He liked saying it. There was something kind of intimate to him knowing your second name.

“You’re so annoying,” you giggled. “Are you not gonna ask me about my future dreams?”

“Your dream wasn’t to become an idol?” he asked, cocking his head slightly to one side.

“Originally it was to be a cowboy,” you explained, earning a belly laugh from him. “But I still have other dreams. Do you not have, like, dreams for your future? Getting married and having a family and stuff?”

“Ohhhh,” he nodded, finally understanding what you meant. “Yeah, I think about that stuff. I’ll get married and maybe have a few kids.”

“Would you travel or are you sick of it now?”

“I’d want them to experience the world, too, I think,” he mused. “There’s too many beautiful places and things to experience, and I want to provide them the opportunity to do all that.”

“I still haven’t been a lot of places,” you said. You realized that Mingyu had kind of been everywhere and you hadn’t really been many places compared to him. “I still have to discover all that, which is kind of exciting.”

‘I’m interested but distant to a fault, and I’d never want to complicate your heart.’

His immediate thought was to show you those places. Replace the faceless wife in his head with you, bringing you and your two kids to all the amazing places he’s seen thus far in his career. 

Relax, he reminded himself with a deep breath that you didn’t catch as you rambled about how traveling was scary but exciting.

This was only the fourth time you’d hung out together since that night after the ball, and the third time since the wound re-opened when Hansol and Ivory went public. Of course you wouldn’t be ready for any sort of romantic thing. And yet, here Mingyu was, becoming delusional for absolutely no reason.

He should be thankful you even reached out. At least, that’s what he told himself. He knew how you felt about wanting absolutely nothing to do with Hansol or what happened, so it was a miracle you invited him over, especially after already asking him out for burgers to “keep the promise.”

"Gyu?” you saying his name brought him out of his thoughts. “You good?”

“Um...” he hesitated, wondering if he should even say anything, but now he was feeling guilty. “Can I actually ask you something?”

“Sure.”

“You’re not...forcing yourself to hang out with me because of our conversation on the car, right?” he wondered slowly and quietly. “I don’t want you to do anything you’re uncomfortable with. If you really don’t want to be friends, I can handle it.”

It would hurt, but he would stay away if you really wanted. He’d get over it eventually.

...Probably.

You let out a sigh and looked down at your lap, picking at your nails, “It’s... Okay, so, yeah, it kind of sucks because of, like...everything. But I also do have fun with you, so... I dunno, I guess I just have to get over the Hansol thing eventually.”

“But I don’t wanna rush you or force you or--”

“Mingyu?”

He stopped talking, just watching you with his mouth half-open. The look you gave him was one that told him you didn’t want to talk about the matter anymore.

“I’m fine. It’s fine,” you promised. “Can we drop it?”

-

I talk a lot but we could fill your frames with pictures of our faces 'til we share a name.

“I’m begging you to shut that song off,” Soonyoung whined.

“And to shut the fuck up for a second,” Minghao sighed in annoyance, kneeling a few feet away from where you, Mingyu, and Soonyoung were leaning back against the pier railing while he snapped some photos. “Your mouth is open is literally all of these. You don’t need to hear your own voice all the time.”

You learned quickly that Mingyu was constantly talking. Currently, he was on a rant about which place on the pier was the best place to get pizza, and that stemmed from a story about going to the beach with Seokmin, which stemmed from wind blowing sand into Minghao’s face. He really knew how to get sidetracked over and over and over.

“If he closes it, he’ll die,” you told him.

Mingyu frowned and glared at you, “I’m not a mouthbreather.”

“And I’m not your journal but you talk like I am,” you shot back with a shit-eating grin.

Mingyu mimicked you with a sneer so you did it back.

Honestly, Mingyu was nervous inviting you out with some of the other members. He kept reminding you that you could say no, but you figured you’d been fine with Mingyu thus far so what was the worst that could happen? He knew better than to invite Hansol, and you figured his friends were smart enough to not bring him or what happened up.

Well, except maybe Soonyoung, but he was doing good so far.

“Okay, I’m over this,” Soonyoung reached around you to Mingyu, ripping away the small bluetooth speaker that was clipped to his jeans and powering it off. “Five times is enough for one song.”

To be fair, you were the one who was playing it this time.

“Can you guys please look less like you hate each other?” Minghao asked.

“We’re fine,” you shrugged, gesturing between you and Mingyu. Then you shot your thumb toward Soonyoung to your left. “It’s this one who’s being a party pooper.”

“Then leave, Soonyoung.”

Both you and Mingyu burst into laughter, causing Minghao to smile at his own statement. Soonyoung looked appalled as he slowly started stepping out of the frame, looking at the younger boy with a mix of confusion, offense, and anger.

“Are you kidding me?” he demanded. 

Before he got up to run away, he snapped a photo of you and Mingyu laughing together.

You didn’t get to see the photos until later when Mingyu was dropping you off. Minghao texted them to you and in the middle of yet another Mingyu tangent, you cut him off to coo at the photos.

It was perfect timing because he just pulled up outside your building, so he leaned over to look.

All of them were kind of a mess. Mingyu’s mouth was open in most of them, or Soonyoung was blinking, or your hair was blown in your own face or one of theirs -- actually, there was a photo where it was both.

It wasn’t until you scrolled to the last one that you let out a laugh from how cute it was. You and Mingyu stood beside each other, you half-bent over and Mingyu holding the railing behind you to stay up as you both laughed toward the camera but not directly at it.

“Shut the fuck up,” you squealed as you immediately went to make it your new lockscreen.

And for once, as Mingyu watched you change a photo of the two of you to your lockscreen, he was at a loss for words, his heart thumping in his chest the only sound that came from him.

“Honestly, I was getting kinda tired looking at my group,” you said absentmindedly as you looked at your new lockscreen. “It was us for a loooong time.”

“What was it before?” he wondered in a murmur.

You looked over at him with a ‘you know who’ look.

“Oh...”

“Yeah...” you sighed.

“Do you think you’re still in love with him?”

Mingyu blurted the question. In classic Mingyu fashion, he just spoke without a filter. He never stopped speaking. You didn’t really expect anything less.

“Wait, that was--”

“No, it’s fine,” you interrupted. “I think...yeah.”

“Yeah...” he mumbled, his mouth going to one side of his face. “I mean, love takes a while to get over.”

You looked over at him, “Have you ever been in love?”

He gulped but hoped you didn’t notice.

“Yeah.”

“You’re single, right?”

“Yeah.”

“How long did it take you to get over it, then?” you wondered, hoping for some advice.

“Honestly? Um...” Mingyu took in a deep breath and let it out slowly, trying to come up with an answer that wasn’t too suspicious. “Honestly, I’m not. I’m just...trying.”

“To be with her?”

“Sort of. I just want to be her friend right now.”

You nodded slowly, “So you’re not friends now?”

“We kind of are. I think.”

You laughed softly and shook your head, “Okay, well, let me know how that goes.”

“Yeah, I will.”

-

I’m living on a target and you shot it with an arrow; Now I lost my self-control, I can’t stop thinking and I’m thinking that I’ve lost it.

Mingyu watched you move around your bedroom as you mumbled the words to yourself mindlessly. You were supposed to be putting away the few pieces of laundry scattered across your floor that you were too lazy to put away, but you were clearly getting distracted.

To be fair, it was his fault. He randomly asked if you wanted to hang out since he finished his schedules early, and you still had a couple hours before your own so you didn’t plan on cleaning until you got home.

Instead of planning accordingly and spending time to get ready, you decided to hang out with Mingyu. But that was okay because Mingyu was supposed to be getting an early night’s sleep since he had to wake up early for recording the next morning.

“Can I ask you something?” he asked suddenly.

You paused what you were doing, looking at him to silently let him know he could ask whatever he wanted.

“Why didn’t you just say no if you were busy?” he chuckled even though he was getting butterflies just knowing you let him come over when you had things to do. It made him feel important; like you wanted to see him that badly.

You shrugged and countered with, “Why didn’t you go home to sleep?”

“I will always readily admit I have back self-control issues,” he stated.

“And who said I don’t?” you scoffed.

The butterflies only got worse. You couldn’t say no to him?

Was he getting delusional again? Absolutely.

Was there any coming back from it? Probably not, but at least he was self-aware.

All these aisles feel like miles; Where you go, I'll follow.

Finally, you grabbed your Switch controllers and went over to your bed, sitting beside him against the headboard and handing him one. 

“So why do you have nighttime schedules?” he asked as you started up Mario Kart.

“Soey insists we sound better at night, so we’re recording at night instead,” you explained. “Since she’s the one with the music degree, we all just kind of listen to whatever she says, I guess.”

“Won’t she ream you for not, like, warming up and stuff?” he chuckled, recalling you talk about how Soey could be when it came to music.

“I can drink tea and play Mario Kart at the same time,” you decided as you got back up from the bed. “I could probably also get Taehyung to distract her or something. You want anything?”

“I’ll just come with you,” he said as he put down the controller and climb out of bed with you.

Mingyu shuffled behind you like a puppy as you led him to the kitchen. Along the way, a few of your members that were hanging around the dorm were greeting him like normal. It had become common for you and Mingyu to hang out, and while it took some warming up for some of the girls, they liked having Mingyu around. Plus, he sometimes made them food.

When you first started hanging out with him, you got the third degree hard. You knew it was just because your friends cared about you and didn’t want you falling back into your awful depression, but it was also kind of annoying that they suddenly wanted to be protective when it felt like they wanted you to get over the whole Hansol thing already. 

But now, it was almost like Mingyu was the thirteenth resident of the dorms. Half the time, if you were somewhere, Mingyu was bound to be there, too.

“Your shadow’s gotten taller,” Mori joked as the two of you passed her in the kitchen.

“If he’s my shadow, you think Soey will be pissed if he ends up at the studio later?” you asked jokingly.

“Wouldn’t put it passed the two of you for him to end up there.”

Mori looked up at Mingyu with a knowing look, and Mingyu just shrugged, cheeks turning pink, “At least I’d be there on time for our session tomorrow.”

-

I know we only just met so why do I feel invested? And do you feel it too? Do you feel it too?

Mingyu finally understood what it was like to want to listen to the same song on repeat. Because that was how he felt about this song. It was the perfect song for his situation. How he fell for you instantly. How he was trying to be respectful while you healed your heart. How he had gotten so attached to you and had begun wondering if you could or would ever feel the same for him. Whenever he heard it, he thought of you, and he never wanted to get you out of his head to he just kept it on.

I could be your best yet; Future favorite regret; Do you feel it too? Do you feel it too?

He watched you, drunk and borderline unhinged, as you passionately sang along to the song in his bedroom. Most of the members had gone out for a night of drinking, and while he invited you, you decided you wanted to stay home so he offered to stay in and drink.

And boy, was he glad he did, or he wouldn’t witness you using his hair mousse as a microphone so you could sing his newest favorite song at the top of your lungs while you jumped on his bed.

I've gotta let you know that I think that I love you so.

It was so hard to not be hopelessly in love with you, especially in moments like this. Moments where you were goofy and unapologetically weird. Moments where you did whatever you wanted and just acted so you. Moments that were rare for the rest of the world to see. Moments that were just for him.

You could be my only one; I've gotta let you know.

You’d come so far from when your heart was first broken, and the more time he spent with you, the harder it became for him to not say anything. Even if you denied him, he wanted to tell you. This must’ve been how you felt when you wanted to confess to Hansol. He wanted to do it so badly that he thought he’d throw up.

But now wasn’t the right time. Not while both of you were drunk. Not while he was still even a little bit unsure if you were over Hansol.

So I'll just tell my telephone all of the above when I'm alone.

In the middle of him laughing loudly and shouting along with you, his phone buzzed on his lap. He picked it up to see it was Minghao texting to see how things were going. Wanting to know if his alone time with you was going well or not.

At least he had his friends to talk to in the mean time so the word vomit wouldn’t make him explode.

So I'll just tell my telephone all of the above when I'm alone.

── « ⋅ʚ ♫ ɞ⋅ » ───

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[silverwings22]

Song of the Sea: Chapter 27: Speed Demon

Chapter warning: gambling, reference to injury, explicit smut Series Warning: explicit smut, alien anatomy (it's a monsterfucker fic, guys), major character injury, grief, canon typical violence, autistic meltdowns, and my terrible attempts at Mando'a

Previous Chapter:

Next chapter:

“If you don’t stop wiggling, I’m gonna have Wrecker hold you down.” Shiani was sitting on the floor of Cid’s bar, holding an electric drill and halfway through disassembling the brace on Tech’s leg to free him.

“I am sorry, but the vibrations from the saw are making the itching worse.” Tech groaned. He hated wearing the brace, because no matter what he did it inevitably started to itch under the bandages wrapped around his actual skin. After the third time he’d tried to stick a screwdriver between the metal and gauze to scratch,  Shiani had finally taken his toolkit. The boredom had driven him half insane until she got him to teach her to play dejarik. 

“You gotta sit still, Tech. If I hit the femoral artery, you’ll die.” She waved the drill at him delicately, tentacle pushing him still in the bar stool while she worked. 

“I appreciate your study into human anatomy, this is still uncomfortable..” He drummed his fingers against the bar top, frustration in his voice. 

She hummed. “So grouchy.” 

“I have been uncomfortable for weeks, and have been unable to do anything constructive since my injury.” He grumbled. He’d been stuck on the ship or bar, requiring help to get in and out of his bunk. He could sort of wobble around with a crutch, though Shiani had been helping him with everything she could, including keeping him upright in the shower. It was far less fun than his brothers made it out to be, since Shiani was outright refusing to risk any additional injury by fooling around. She was right and he knew it, but that didn’t mean he didn’t miss the intimacy. 

Shiani chuckled as she pulled back down the safety glasses he made her wear whenever she touched tools. “Well, hold still a little longer. Once I get this off, you’ll feel better.” 

He scrunched his nose but did his best to sit still. She at least tried to work quickly, and once she’d gotten the last bolt off she pulled the metal framing apart with her claws. “Finally.” Tech groaned, pulling his leg out and immediately scratching furiously. 

Shiani snickered, setting the brace aside. “Bend your knee, then stand slowly. Make sure it can bear weight.” 

Tech nodded, flexing the leg and standing slowly. “There is no pain, though some weakness from disuse.” 

“That’s easy to recover.” She nodded, standing up and squeaking when he pulled her into an embrace. “Tech.”

The brilliant clone kissed her with a faint smirk. “Yes, my dear?”

“Nowhere to go with all your flirting.” She looked a little unhappy about it as well. “Hunter and Echo left for their mission, we’re supposed to keep Wrecker and Omega out of trouble. They already started making bets over at the dejarik table in the back.”

Tech groaned again. “This is an inopportune time for us to have no privacy.”

“She nuzzled her relatively flat nose against his gently. “Tonight we can make sure that leg is fully functional.” 

He smiled. “You are incorrigible.”

“Me?” She laughed. “Tell that to the look you were giving me every time you had to have help in the fresher.” She winked, walking over to Omega and Wrecker. As she did she picked up the metal cage that had been the brace and examined how the metal had held up through the weeks. If she ever had to build something like this again, she could learn from it. 

Omega was happily beating Wrecker when the siren joined them at the dejarik table. “How much Mantell Mix have you two wagered?” She smiled. 

“Wrecker owes me two boxes.” Omega grinned. 

Shiani looked at Wrecker. “Where are you gonna get two boxes? Hunter said no more snacks on tab.”

Wrecker rubbed the back of his neck. “Can I borrow some credits?”

“You think I have credits? Everything I make from fixing things for Cid I give to Hunter.” She laughed. “We’re going to have to sell Wrecker to the circus to pay for snacks, Baby Mega.”

“Nooo!” Omega squeaked. “We can’t sell him!”

“Hunter sold Echo.” Shiani ruffled Omega’s hair. 

“I’ll forget about the snacks.” Omega promised, looking at her pleadingly. “Don’t sell Wrecker to the circus.” 

“I won’t. I love Wrecker too.” Shiani smiled, patting his shoulder as well. 

“Is that Tech’s leg brace?” Omega pointed at the dented metal in the siren’s hands. 

“Yeah. He’s so happy to have it off. He hated it so much!” She wrapped Omega in a hug.

Omega laughed as the siren playfully squished her, and they were still laughing when Tech walked over from the bar. “There he is.” Wrecker beamed. “Back on his feet again.”

Shiani gave her mate a bright smile. “Feel better?”

“Much.” Tech smiled. “How many credits have they lost?”

“None.” Omega shook her head. “Shiani said she’d sell Wrecker to the circus to pay for the Mantell Mix, so I let it go.” 

“There are no circuses on Ord Mantell, as far as I am aware.” Tech raised an eyebrow at her. 

Shiani gestured at Wrecker. “Are you going to pay him for snacks to give to Baby Mega? You do the budget.” 

“... I can find a circus.” Tech looked at Wrecker. “Stop gambling.” 

“I’m already teaching Omega to play sabacc.” Wrecker looked at Shiani, who draped a tentacle over his face dramatically.

“That’s worse than dejarik!” She laughed. 

“Hey, you four. Quit running up the power bill.” Cid’s voice cut into their conversation. “I got a job for you.” 

“Hunter and Echo aren’t back.” Omega frowned. 

“And they have the ship.” Shiani crossed her arms, cocking a hip and looking Cid firmly in the eye. She wasn’t scared of much, the trandoshan gave her that. 

“We won’t need them, or the ship. C’mon. You’re going to be my security.” Cid waved for them to follow her. 

“Where are we going?” Omega frowned. 

“Safa Toma.” Cid kept waving, looking annoyed. “The shuttle’s here. C’mon.”

“We will need more of a debriefing than that.” Tech frowned, but followed Shiani as she picked up her chest plate and bag from the corner booth.

“Too bad. You’ll learn on the job.” Cid huffed. 

Shiani rolled her eyes for the millionth time. “Rude!”

“I am beginning to understand why you needed security.” Tech frowned as they followed Cid through a crowded arena on Safa Toma. “But why are we here to begin with?”

“Placing bets. Stay close, Goggles.” Cid muttered, waving them towards a booky counter. Shiani was looking around with wide eyed fascination at all the different people pressed together. There was a racetrack everyone was gathered around, unusual looking speeders flying by at incredible speed. 

Tech had to grab her when she started to wander towards the railing for a better view. “What is this?” She pointed. “I’ve never seen speeders like this.”

“It’s Riot Racing, Suckers. Live weapons, high stakes, and lots of money to win.” Cid grinned. A speeder went whizzing by at the front of the pack and Shiani dragged Tech to the railing anyway. “That’s my ringer, Tay-O.” 

“Ringer? What’s a ringer?” Shiani watched the speeder, leaning out to try to get a better look. It was massively modified, and her mind was racing with possibilities. She loved this kind of thing, where the only limit of what you could make was your own skill and creativity. 

“Careful. I did say live weapons.” Cid nudged her back as another speeder wrecked out into the wall. “Ringer means winner. C’mon, he’s landing.” 

They followed her to the service pit, watching a droid climbing out of the speeder. “Your ringer is a droid?” Tech sounded skeptical, looking Tay-O up and down. 

The droid had a level of sass that felt more personal than programming. “Could you calculate split second micro-adjustments at that speed? I don't think so.”

“I could.” Tech just eyed the droid with annoyance.

“Unlikely.” 

Shiani walked right past Tay-O and started examining the speeder curiously, sticking her head inside. “12 series.” She said out loud. 

“Those were not designed for high speed.” Tech frowned. 

“Heavily modified.” Shiani called back. “Engine looks like an industrial skiff with a pod racer’s drive core. And the chassis is so thin it's essentially flimsi.” She poked the metal with a claw lightly. “Light, but ineffective if you're facing live weapons.”

“Who are you? Who is she, Spectacled Spectator?” Tay-O demanded, looking from the siren to the clone. 

“That would be my wife. She is a very talented mechanic.” Tech smirked. Shiani loved mechanic work more than anything else they did together, while he preferred the software over hardware. He made sure she was versed in everything he was doing, but this was where she could shine.

 Shiani waved her claw at the droid. “Rude. It's not Tech's fault you sacrificed hull integrity to save weight instead of optimizing engine output. There's not even any protection on the stabilizers!” 

Cid clapped Shiani on the shoulder. “Why don't you look at the specs and see what you could tune up for me, huh?”

“Thought you needed security.” Shiani frowned. 

“That's what I got the guys for. And Tiny's here for luck.”

The siren's eyes flicked to a large dowutin approaching with a group of followers. There was an uncomfortable feeling Shiani couldn't quite identify coming from them. “I think you're gonna need luck, Cid.”

The trandoshan turned around. “Grini Millegi.”

“Ciddarin Scaleback. You've got a lot of nerve turning up on my turf.”

“Business is business.” Cid shrugged. “I've got business here.”

Wrecker and Tech, in the spirit of being security, got between the two of them. Millegi chuckled. “Your little misfit crew has guts, but you'll need more than that to beat Jet Venim.” He gestured to his little pinched-face lizard racer.

“Tay-O won last time. He'll do it again.” Omega said firmly. 

“Then Cid won't be opposed to our usual side wager.” Millegi smirked.

“You're on.” Cid nodded. 

“See you on the track.” Millegi turned to walk away, Venim snarling something in a language Shiani didn't recognize. 

“What's he saying, Tech?” Wrecker frowned. 

“You do not want to know.” The genius put his arm around Shiani and walked her away. “This Millegi seems very familiar and antagonistic with you, Cid.”

Shiani cocked her head to the side. “What's the ‘side wager’?”

“More credits than I've got.” Cid huffed. 

“Then why did you make the bet?!” Shiani squawked. “See, Baby Mega, this is why gambling is bad!”

“It's just business.” Cid grumbled. 

“That felt personal.” Shiani gave her a look as Tay-O got back in the screaming metal death trap speeder and they followed Cid back to the stands. “What happens if you lose?”

“They'll take me for collateral until the debt is paid. I'd have to give them everything I made until then.” Cid looked sheepish.

“Oh, like how you blackmail the Batch?” Shiani gave Cid an unimpressed look. “Can't be so bad a deal if it's what you give us…”

“Shut it, Suckers.”

Shiani huffed and pulled Omega back from the railings edge. “Not so close. Live weapons.” She said gently, making sure the girl was safe. 

Omega watched a racer overshoot and strike a bystander two boxes over in the chest. “Oh…”

Cid was yelling at the droid on her comm about avoiding the left tunnel, so Shiani pulled the course map up on her datapad to look at. She showed it to Tech after a minute, who shook his head. “There are two many variables for me to accurately predict a winner.”

“Better hope it's Tay-O. The droid is a jerk, but if Cid has to go somewhere it could be trouble for us.” Shiani nodded. “...and cheating is another variable. Look, Tech.”

Cid paled and Tech watched curiously as Venim engaged a circular saw on the front of his speeder, cutting into the exposed stabilizers Shiani had pointed out earlier. Tay-O lost control and careened into the wall, skidding into scrap. 

Omega looked between Tech and Cid. “What do we do now?”

“Go down to recover the droid and speeder.” Tech sighed. 

“If there's anything left.” Wrecker nodded. 

They got down to the dirt and started picking up pieces. “I do not believe the speeder is salvageable, but I can repair the droid if we locate enough parts.” Tech sighed.

Shiani peeked out from behind the crumpled sheet of speeder scrap. “I can fix this… probably. Or at least make a new one out of the parts.”

“We've got bigger problems.” Omega whispered, pointing at Millegi approaching.

“Time to pay up, Cid.” He was grinning widely. 

“You'll get your credits. I'm good for it, I just need a little time.” Cid took a step back as he approached her threateningly. “You two want to step in here? I didn't bring you for company.”

Before a particularly ugly fight could break out, Omega piped up. “One more race! Double or nothing!”

“With your speeder and droid as scrap?” Millegi eyed the girl, and Shiani when she stepped up beside her. 

“I can fix the speeder. Tech can fix the droid. Give us till tomorrow, then we race.” She squared her shoulders and met the massive man’s eyes, blinking up at him.

He considered her for a minute. “You got guts, I'll give you that. Fine. But when you lose, you better pay up for your own sake. And we'll take Cid for collateral overnight.”

He let a now slightly terrified Cid away, and Tech looked at Shiani. “Are you sure about this, cyar'ika?”

“Yes. We can win.” She said firmly, with all the confidence he admired so much in her. “We will win!”

While Tech worked on a loudly complaining Tay-O, Shiani worked on the speeder. Wrecker was moving big parts for her while Omega handed her tools. “Are you sure you can fix it, Shiani?” The girl asked as her friend slid underneath the wreckage on a creeper.

“I am no longer repairing the speeder. I’m building an entirely new one with broken parts.” The siren stuck a tentacle out. “Spanner please.”

“So it is in equally bad shape as the droid.” Tech sighed. 

“I can still race. Where are my arms?” The obnoxious Tay-O grumbled. 

“We found them ten meters from your butt.” Omega huffed. “Be nice to Tech.”

“Why don't we just scrap this and rescue Cid? We could rush Millegi’s penthouse with the four of us.” Wrecker offered. 

“Millegi is a powerful criminal with significant resources. Our standard military approach is more likely to get us killed than successfully rescue her.” Tech pointed out. 

Shiani rolled out from under the speeder. “Tech is right. And even if we got away, he'd come after us. He's got to know about her Parlor on Ord Mantell. Our only option is to win.”

“I will. And lucky for you all, because the last people who couldn't pay up to Millegi are facing permanent retirement in the Eastern dunes.”

“Permanent retirement… dead?” Shiani frowned.

“I do not understand how you are intelligent enough to rebuild a speeder but can't understand Basic.” Tay-O sneered. “Then again, your husband is putting my arms on wrong. Have you ever wired a servo before, human?”

Tech poked him with a soldering iron. “I have. Watch how you speak to her.”

Shiani flapped her hand and went back under the chassis. “I built a functional starship out of garbage. Would have worked too, if I'd had time to test it. What can you build except scrap piles out of your own body?”

Omega giggled. “I wish I could have seen your ship, Shiani. Did you name it?”

“It was ugly, but it was all mine.” Shiani chuckled. “The name was Yellow Horizon.”

Omega let herself get swept up in the imagination of the moment, picturing Shiani as a captain of her own vessel zooming around the stars. 

Wrecker sighed, bringing her moment down. “What happens if we don’t win?”

Shiani sighed. “Either they kill us, or they get the credits out of us another way. I don’t think it would be far off what the Zygyrrians were going to do to us.”

Tech’s fingers twitched on the soldering iron his hands at the memory of being trapped in a collar while a slaver hauled off and slapped Shiani, or the way his skin had crawled when they’d threatened to yank her teeth out. “That will not be allowed to happen.” He said firmly. 

He had no doubt Shiani would fetch a price for some eccentric, rich, and unethical collector. But he wasn’t ever going to let anyone take her away from him. She was the one thing in this galaxy he could afford to be selfish about.

“Of course not.” Shiani smiled. “We’re going to win. I don’t have any doubts.”

Morning light found both Tech and Shiani's projects complete and the two of them asleep on the pit workroom floor back to back. It was far from the romance she'd promised him, but Wrecker and Omega were nice enough to bring them both cups of caf when it was time to wake them up. Shiani fumbled her way through two cups before she was awake enough to follow Tech outside. “Morning.”

“Good morning, cyar'ika.” He was engrossed in his datapad, though he opened an arm for her to cuddle under it. 

“What are you looking at?” She yawned.

“The track schematics based on your new speeder modifications. I believe it would be beneficial to divert power from the weapons system to the rear deflector shield.”

Shiani nodded, waking up. “The weapons array is entirely detachable now. Fixed position didn't account for melee weapons like the saw yesterday.”

Behind them, Tay-O scoffed. “Racing is about speed and skill, which you both lack. Offense is the best strategy.”

Shiani gave him a baleful look. “There’s till time for me to remove your vocal components before the race.”

“I will win-” Tay-O started. Before he could finish whatever self-important babbling he had, Shiani's head jerked to the side and her ears pinned back.

“Look out!” She grabbed Tech and jumped backwards as an out-of-control speeder came veering off the track. They ducked as it slammed into Tay-O, breaking him back into scrap. 

“I… regret nothing…” The droid mumbled before shorting out. 

“Accidents happen all the time on racetracks.” Millegi's voice held a bite of laughter. “But you're down a racer. Looks like you forfeit.”

“That was no acci-” Shiani hissed, but Tech put a hand on top of her head. 

“I will race. We are still on.” He said firmly, looking at Shiani. 

She squirmed but nodded as the realization they had no other choice dawned on her. Wrecker was too big, Omega was too young, and Shiani wasn’t as skillful a pilot as he was. “Be careful.” She finally mumbled. 

“I will. I promise.” He squeezed her hand, then headed for the speeder and loaded in to drive around to the starting position. 

Shiani pointed into the pit for Omega and Wrecker, putting a headset on. “Ears on, Tech.”

Omega sat beside her with the track schematics pulled up as the announcer called out each competitor one by one. The crowd cheered for each known one, but went silent when the announcer made fun of Tech's name. “Tech? That’s it? That’s his name?”

Omega looked over at Shiani's resolute face. She was always protective of Tech… “You okay?”

“Everyone here will see today.” The siren said solemnly. “They’ll see Tech the way I do. You watch.”

“How do you know?” Wrecker frowned. 

“I feel it in the Song. Harmony and Melody won't let us down.” She made a self assured noise. 

When the starting gun went off, Tech was solidly in the middle of the pack and dodging weapons coming his way. Wrecker looked somewhat unimpressed. “Uh, Tech. The point is to be in the front!”

“It's called strategy.”

“It's called losing!”

Shiani gently bopped Wrecker with a tentacle. “Venim coming up right side rear, Tech.”

“Thank you. Approaching Gambler's Gulch.”

Shiani glanced at the track schematics and frowned. “The left track is shorter but incomplete.”

“You said the weapons array was detachable?”

“It’s only the first lap, Tech. No time for a pit stop yet.”

“I will not be stopping. But I need more speed.”

Shiani blinked and pushed the other two back. “Clear!”

Tech diverted into the pit without stopping and jettisoned his weapons before taking off again. “Transmit the left tunnel schematics, cyar'ika.”

Omega frowned. “You'll never make it with the track in that condition.”

“I will if I am going fast enough.”

“What's he doing?” Wrecker looked at Shiani. 

She reached into her bag and pulled out a ball bearing, making a loop with her tentacle and flicking the ball hard enough to make it do a loop-de-loop on her skin without falling. 

“He's going to drive on the tunnel ceiling?” Omega gasped.

“And run Venim right into the broken part.” Shiani smirked. “He’s so smart.”

When Tech came flying out of the tunnel, it was with a cloud of smoke from someone else's crash behind him, and he careened over the finish line. Shiani jumped up, cheering and bouncing, as he came to a stop. It took him a minute to get out of the speeder, looking around in awe at the cheering, delighted crowd.

They were chanting his name, so he gave a 2-finger salute before turning to look for his wife and siblings. Shiani was already climbing the safety rail with a bouncy little squeal of delight, landing on the track and running to him. “You won! I knew you could do it!”

He chuckled. “Your speeder design was most helpful.”

She took both his hands in hers and looked up at the cheering crowd, eyes bright. They kept chanting his name, and she could only grin. “Took them a long time, but see? Everyone sees you how I do now. Like you can do anything.” 

Wrecker walked over with Omega on his shoulder. “You did it!” She giggled. 

“Was there ever any doubt?” Tech put his arm around Shiani. 

“A little.” Wrecker smiled weakly. 

“Let’s go get Cid and go home.” Shiani said firmly. “This place is sketchy to begin with.”

“Good idea.” Wrecker agreed, and they headed in the direction they spotted Venim limping. “Think he'll give us any trouble?”

“Cid always brings trouble. Selfish.” Shiani huffed.

“I do have reservations about how little we truly know of her.” Tech nodded. 

“She's our friend. That's enough, right?” Omega looked between the three adults, but none of them seemed too convinced. 

Cid was waiting for them to walk into the suite. “I knew you could do it! I owe you one, Goggles.”

“You do.” He agreed.

“Let's get out of here.” She beckoned them to follow. “I'll make it up to you.”

Shiani was staring Venim down when he reached for a blaster on the bar, showing her fangs with a hiss until Millegi took the gun. “You four. A word.” He murmured. 

The clones and siren all turned to him. “Yes?” Shiani frowned. 

“Your loyalty is impressive. But with Cid it doesn't always go both ways. Watch your backs.” He said quietly. 

They exchanged glances, before nodding and walking out. Omega was already disregarding the warning, chattering to Cid about their night in the pit while Wrecker snagged a snack for the road.

Shiani just kept her eyes on Cid's back. 

Selfish hearts.

Hunter and Echo were back by the time they got home, so Wrecker and Omega opted to hang out in the bar and tell them the story of the Riot Race. Shiani was listening with a drink Cid had given her ‘on the house’ for saving her ass, when the siren realized Tech was absent. 

Without attracting too much attention, she slipped out of the bar to the Marauder, hearing the telltale sounds of a genius at work. “Tech?” She called. 

“Behind the work table.” He called. 

She chuckled, stepping into the ship to spot him, laying on the floor with his head in a panel. Repairing his ship, finally free of the constricting leg brace. “Bored of Baby Mega bragging on you?”

“I was simply bored in general. The race was so adrenaline-inducing that this seems dead in comparison.”

Shiani leaned over the work table from the opposite side, draping her body across the durasteel. There was a playful look in those big eyes that Tech noticed immediately. “You won the race. Don't winners get rewards?”

“It is likely Cid took any profit for herself.” He blinked, his cheeks reddening when Shiani reached out and caught a claw in the hem of his flak vest, then traced her way down to his belt. 

“She's selfish.” Shiani nodded. “But so am I. Everyone on Safa Toma was cheering your name, and you know what I was thinking?” The tip of the viciously sharp nail dipped below his belt and skimmed the front seam of his jeans. 

“And what was that?” He swallowed hard, flustered immediately. It had been too long since he'd gotten to touch her; just this light teasing had him about to combust. 

“No matter how many pretty girls scream your name, I can make you scream mine.” She cooed. “I didn’t get you all to myself last night on Safa Toma, but the invitation still stands for the ship fresher so I can reward my champion?”

Tech sat up immediately, catching her wrist and pushing her arm outward so he could kiss her. It was haphazard and crooked, but carried all the needy desire Shiani could get drunk on.  Sometimes Tech could take over her senses and give orders that made her knees shake. Other times she could pin him to the wall and make him forget anything but her name. There was no telling how tonight would go, but all that mattered was getting to love him. 

She giggled, climbing over the table gracefully and settled into his lap, kisses turned hungry as she ground her hips into his. Without his armor, his desire was painfully apparent. 

“If you keep teasing, this will end sooner than you want it to.” He groaned softly when her lips moved to his neck.

“Probably should go to the fresher. Don't want your brothers to catch us.” She whispered, breath hitched and needy. “I might just cry if something else interrupts us after so long.”

Tech was up and on his feet in an instant, walking her to the fresher and setting her on the small counter. He locked the door behind them and unlatched her chestplate in the same motion. They'd all updated their armor in the months since Kamino, with her wearing the matching stripe of orange paint to his, decorated with three blue hearts. Underneath she wore a pair of overalls with the hips cut out, a belt with her holster and thigh bag, and a crop top. She carried her mechanic tools in her gear bag, though, instead of his preferred many external pockets.

He was grateful he wouldn't have to deal with all those straps though, and kissed her hard as she kicked off her boots and went for his belt with her hands. Her tentacles were fiddling with the water, getting it on and to the correct temperature. Steam filled the room as their clothes hit the floor, faster and faster. He’d been chasing adrenaline on Safa Toma, but now he was chasing an even more intoxicating kind of high. 

Once both of them were bare, Tech took a step back and pulled her by the hand into the warm water. Shiani pounced the minute the shower door shut, dropping to her knees and taking his length in her hand. “You were brilliant. Best pilot in the race, smartest in the galaxy.” She cooed, watching him melt at the praise before swallowing him whole. 

Tech groaned and bucked, fingers tracing through the water-slick tentacles of her head into they felt the skull underneath. Squeeze squeeze squeeze. “You were ex-exceptional. Rebuilding that sp-speeder… oh fuck… overnight. I could never have w-won without you, Shiani…”

She loved how his voice sounded when he moaned her name and doubled her efforts on his cock. She wanted to make him come apart on her tongue, her own body alive and on fire at the sounds he was making. Her hands skimmed appreciatively up his thighs and down his stomach, those pretty and lethal nails delicate over his skin as they drew reddened, raised lines. His abs tensed and his breath was ragged, so close to coming undone she could feel it herself, so she didn't expect him to wrap his hand in her ponytail and yank her off him. 

She looked up, wide eyed, as he panted above her. “On your feet, cyar'ika. I know exactly what I want as a reward. Talented as you have become with that lovely mouth of yours, I want to come inside of you.”

His bluntness was always appreciated, Shiani with no time or patience to sort through flowered phrases in search of meaning. He was the closest thing to as direct as siren emotion-sharing could be, and that transparency was the reason she fell for him. She got to her feet with a nod at his words, offering herself to his waiting arms. Tech gifted her a tender kiss on the forehead before he turned her around and pushed her into the wall, nudging her feet apart with his own. She shivered as her bare chest and cheek pressed into the still cool durasteel, the steam having not had time to warm it. The stark contrast to it and Tech’s warm hands on her hips electrified her skin. 

When he calculated his angle and sank into her, she arched her back onto a pretty little semi-circle that brought her head to his shoulder. Tech's cheek pressed against her own, the edge of his goggles hard against her face. He held completely still, buried inside his siren with one hand splayed across her sternum and the other braced against the wall. “You are- fuck-...” He mumbled. Hearing him forget what he was talking about halfway through the sentence turned her on even more, and he groaned when her body clenched around him. 

“Missed you like this.” Shiani answered, trailing into desperate whimpers when he started moving. One of his hands moved down to circle her clit, bringing her hurriedly ahead to join him as his own orgasm came hurtling towards him. 

Tech could only nod in agreement and snap his hips into hers. His breath hitched, feeling her clench again when the band of tension that wound through her snapped and pulled him along too. 

He squished her into the wall, jelly-limbed, catching his breath until he could stand upright. Shiani just turned around and drew him back down, now kissing him languidly and running her fingers over his chest and shoulders. He'd gotten his winners reward, now she was taking hers as she basked in his presence and affection. 

“I love you.” She mumbled, picking up the soap to actually clean him up now.

Tech kissed her again. “I love you too, cyar'ika.”

They were still kissing, taking turns taking care of the other by washing hair or skin between presses of their lips,  when they both heard a voice outside the fresher door.

Omega’s voice. 

“Tech! Shiani! The fresher isn't big enough for two people! You're never gonna get clean!”

Wrecker and Echo's voices were howling with laughter.  Hunter was making uncomfortable noises. “Omega, just give them a minute-”

 Shiani looked up at Tech, eyes wide. He looked just as startled as she was. “... we will be out momentarily, Omega.” He finally managed to say. 

“But why'd you both go in there at the same time!?”

“Saving water.” Shiani offered. “Give us five minutes!”

“Okay. But hurry, I gotta brush my teeth before bed.” The girl called back,  footsteps disappearing. 

They were turning off the water when Hunter banged on the door with his knuckles. “I swear to Manda you better clean everything you two fuck on.” He grumbled before disappearing.  

Shiani looked at Tech and signed instead of speaking, knowing Hunter could hear them almost anywhere on the ship. 

“Good thing he can't see in blacklight filter. I'm pretty sure there's still an imprint on the cockpit ceiling.”

[allthefakepeople]

11 and/or 12 (actually all of the above, but I’m not gonna make you do that bestie lmao) for Wilmon

hi hi meg bestie

i'm sorry this took a little longer to get to you than i originally thought however it is still over 1K.

and just for you i combined both prompts into one post

also i saw THIS post and @daylightsimon tag and those helped to inspire the final scene.

without further ado, i hope you like it

-miels 💜✨

Kissing Prompts (pls send me more)

Prompt(s):

11. Morning kisses that are exchanged before either person opens their eyes, kissing blindly until their lips meet in a blissful encounter

12. Sneaking away to a hidden corner to share a secretive kiss

After the insanity that was the month following Wilhelm’s coming out, Wille and Simon had made an unspoken promise to never take the simple moments for granted again. This included spending afternoons by the lake together, taking in the scene as much as they take in each other, having dinners with Linda (the tension between Simon and Sara was still too fraught and neither could bear explaining the situation to Linda yet) followed by reacquainting Wille with Simon’s room, and exchanging casual “i love yous” that still managed to leave both of them breathless. Every moment they spent together just solidified what they already knew, that this was it. That if they could have this for the rest of their lives, they would be happy. 

Of course there were still moments sprinkled throughout their paradise where reality would settle in. Where they would snap at each other or where they realized that the other needed something that they just couldn’t provide at that moment. Wille was still working on understanding what the entire winter and semester had been like for Simon, while also learning how to be there for Simon. Wille had never felt more lucky than, ironically, when Simon had a breakdown in his arms. Simon had run into Micke at the store; it had sent him into a spiral that led to finally opening up to Wille about Simon’s relationship with his father. All Wille could think about while Simon cried softly in his arms was how lucky he was that Simon trusted him again, trusted him at all actually. On the other hand, Simon had started to understand the pressure Wille was under and realized how little Wille had been allowed to mourn the death of Erik. Simon also finally witnessed what it was like when Wille had a panic attack. Not everything was perfect.

But despite the harder times, Wille and Simon always came out of it stronger and, most importantly, together. Simon had never felt happier and Wille, never more at peace. The smiles came freely and the laughter was endless. The past few months were washed away with every light-hearted giggle that passed between them. 

Another thing they would never take for granted again was waking up next to each other. 

Wille could feel his body coming back into consciousness. The early morning sounds of Hillerska filled his ears. He could feel a warm body pressed up against him and felt his mouth spread into a smile at the feeling. Sometimes he felt tears prick his eyes at the filling of Simon being in his arms again. But today he just felt content. At peace. His eyes slowly opened and he turned his head to gaze at where Simon rested against him. Wille’s eyes tracked Simon from the top of his head all the way down to where Simon’s torso disappeared beneath the covers. He felt a warm glow rush through him, filling him up and rushing out of him again. His hand that had been wrapped around Simon’s waist started to lightly stroke along Simon’s side, encouraging him to wake up. 

Once the light didn’t work, Wille leaned forward and started leaving light kisses along Simon’s neck. This seemed to do the trick because Wille felt Simon let out a sigh, the most pure sigh he had ever heard, before he shifted onto his back. Simon’s eyes were still closed but Wille knew he was waking up. Wille watched, charmed, as Simon’s head turned towards him and his lips pursed as if asking for a kiss. Wille would never deny Simon but he also enjoyed teasing his boyfriend just a little too much. 

Instead of immediately pressing his lips to Simon’s, as what his boyfriend was requesting, Wille lightly pressed his lips to Simon’s cheek instead. He felt the subtle way Simon’s mouth twitched upward before it settled back into a pout. 

“Wille.” Wille felt a slight shiver flow through him hearing his name fall from Simon’s lips in his morning voice. However he wasn’t about to give in just yet. He leaned over and pressed his lips to Simon’s other cheek instead, feeling the way Simon had started to tense up. A sure sign he was about to laugh. Wille settled completely over Simon and felt a hint of something possessive flow through him over how perfectly he fit between Simon’s legs. Wille then brought his lips up to Simon’s forehead and pressed his lips gentle to the smooth skin there. Simon still refused to open his gorgeous, dark eyes so Wille moved down to his nose. He then moved to the corner of Simon’s mouth. 

Wille knew what was coming next. Simon quickly turned his head so that their mouths would connect. Wille smiled against Simon’s mouth over being able to predict his moves so accurately. Their lips moved slowly but softly together. Neither moving to deepen it quite yet. Wille felt Simon’s hands trail up and into his hair, as they usually do, and he melted completely into Simon. Wille pulled away briefly, smirking lightly over Simon’s mouth following his. 

“What happened to complaining over my disgusting morning breath?” Wille jokes, their lips brushing together. He feels Simon’s mouth spread into a smile at this.

“It’s still disgusting…” Simon reconnects their lips quickly before continuing. “but I don’t really care.” This time it’s Wille’s turn for his mouth to spread into a smile. Finally he pulls his mouth away and opens his eyes, wanting to feel the weight of Simon’s love on him. As his own eyes open, they connect to Simon’s and he feels a rightness settle inside him over finally having Simon’s eyes on him this morning. 

“Good morning.” Wille greets, watching as affection fills Simon’s expression.

“Morning.” Simon brings his hand up to brush Wille’s hair out of his eyes, it’s continued to grow longer in the past two months and he hasn’t cut it yet, and settles his hand on the back of Wille’s neck. Wille brings his own hand up to Simon’s jaw and lightly strokes the edge, preening internally over the way Simon pushes into his touch. 

“We should probably start getting ready for today.” Wille admits, though he really doesn’t want to leave this moment yet. Simon clearly agrees because he whines lightly.

“Not yet. Please, a few more minutes.” And who is Wille to argue? He brings his lips back down to Simon’s and settles back into his arms. 

* * *

Later that day, after a long day, Wille and Simon are cuddled together at the back of the main room at Manor House. The usual film night in full swing. It felt so nice to be able to be wrapped up in each other and have no one bat an eye. Wille had his arm wrapped around Simon’s shoulder while Simon’s head rested on Wille’s shoulder. They had a blanket across their lap and their hands were intertwined underneath, Wille’s thumb stroking along Simon’s. They had taken a little bit to feel comfortable showing this much affection in front of the Hillerska students after everything that had happened, but eventually they realized that they didn’t want to waste even more time not in each other’s arms after everything. 

Simon’s eyes were on the projector screen, attention completely captured by whatever film was being shown, however Wille had never been good at tearing his eyes away from Simon. Anytime they watched something together Wille always preferred taking in Simon’s expressions rather than whatever was on the screen. He knew that Simon could tell that Wille was staring at him, but Simon never gave any indication that he cared, other than to tease him of course. 

Eventually, having felt Wille’s eyes on him for long enough, Simon turned and caught Wille’s gaze. Delight filled Simon over Wille’s cheeks clearly darkening, even after all this time still getting flustered. Despite being caught, however, Wille didn’t tear his eyes away from Simon. Instead Wille leaned over and whispered in Simon’s ear.

“I love you, Simon.” Wille then pulled back and Simon felt flutters in his chest over those four words. Their eyes connected and tension slowly built between them. As much as they got used to holding hands and cuddling in front of people, they still refrained from anything other than simple pecks on the lips when around other people. This meant, more often than not, they usually snuck away to be alone. They knew people were definitely aware of what was going on when they left together but, for the most part, people were respectful of their boundaries and only those they trusted, life Felice or Maddie, joked with them about it.

Wille gestured his head towards the door and Simon nodded in response to the unspoken question. They quietly unraveled from each other and snuck out the door closest to them, one of the benefits of getting a seat near the back. Once they were in  the hall they both sped up knowing exactly where they were headed. They reached the window seat from their first kiss and immediately turned towards each other, giggling at the obvious anticipation between them. Wille sat down on the seat and opened his legs for Simon to slide between, Simon’s arms crossing behind Willes head while Wille’s hands snuck around Simon’s waist, pulling him in. 

“I love you, too. I realize I didn’t say it back there.” Wille’s expression at these words leaves Simon breathless. Their lips come together naturally, softly at first but quickly deepening. Simon’s hands move from behind Wille’s neck into his hair and Wille’s hands travel under Simon’s shirt to rest directly on the skin above his waistband. Simon inhales at feeling Wille’s hands directly on his skin, sparks still filling him at Wille’s touch. At the sound of Simon’s gasp, Wille quickly stands from the window seat and slides his hands down Simon’s legs before picking him up, Simon’s legs instinctively wrapping around Wille. 

“God, it’s still so hot that you can do that so easily.” Simon’s voice is filled with desire and Wille feels it throughout his whole body.

“Well you’re just hot in general.” Wille retorts, slowly walking them back until Simon’s back is pressed against the wall next to the doorway.

“God, you’re so cheesy.” Simon teases, although Wille can tell he’s pleased by the compliment anyways.

“Maybe you should shut me up then.” Simon’s eyes turn even darker somehow at Wille’s words and any other thought that either of them has is quickly lost to the night as their lips connect again.

[secretsofthestorymakers]

Wish Analysis Pt. 1/3

I just saw Wish and 😍😍✨🤩!!!!!! I love it SO MUCH!!!! I have a rule for myself: watch first, analyze later, so I only really have surface level analysis right now, but I figured I’d write and post it anyway! Sorry this is gonna be super long, I typed a whole essay! Obviously spoilers ahead:

First of all, let me just say that I was absolutely dazzled! The animation, the songs, the story, AHHH so good! And STAR 🤩🤩!! YES! The songs felt very Disney, but in a new way that I absolutely loved. I was crying, stifling screams (because movie theater), and I nearly fell off my chair a few times. I’m legit thinking about going to see it again tomorrow.

Ok, enough of me just fangirling haha. There were so many references to other Disney movies in Wish. I know I missed some while watching and I’ve forgotten some since then, but I’ll try to summarize what I saw. Beginning with a storybook was a beautiful choice as a nod to old Disney movies. So many Snow White references, it was insane. Dahlia and the other kitchen workers were the seven dwarves, the wishing well (that was also a hidden Mickey), Magnifico’s whole hidden lair (especially the poison apple and listing ingredients). There was a bear named John (Little John from Robin Hood), a bunny did Thumper’s foot tapping thing, a deer named Bambi, the mushrooms and flowers dancing could be Alice in Wonderland all in the You’re a Star sequence. There were lanterns and the boats as a reference to Tangled. The vines of magic across the castle at the end looked very much like Maleficent’s magic. The swirling clouds above the castle looked like Night on Bald Mountain. When Magnifico got trapped in the staff at the end was very Jafar in the lamp. At one moment in the forest Magnifico directly mirrored a shot of the Headless Horsemen from The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr Toad. Asha riding on a deer surrounded by other deer could have been a reference to Lost in the Woods. And all the wishes briefly mentioned/shown were references to other Disney movies; one directly used footage from Peter Pan (and then showed Peter and Wendy in the very end), a wish for true love could be any number of movies, the wish to sail a ship could be Peter Pan, but I think was probably Moana, the wish for a perfect nanny for their children must have been Mary Poppins (which is slightly odd, since every other reference I caught was to an animated movie, but whatever), and the one to climb a mountain was about Strange World. I know I’ve missed dozens of references, but that’s all I can think of right now!

[glowstick909]

Chapter 3: Here’s the sugar on the cream

“No, we can’t send any more spies.” Vox said, exasperated. He reached for his coffee mug, feeling a small pang of satisfaction at the “Fuck Alastor” written on it. It was petty, sure, but he deserved.

“Why not?” Valentino pouted. Vox groaned inwardly. Val was good for sex, but that was pretty much where his skills ended. He couldn’t see shit, didn’t know how to fight, and was incredibly stupid at times. “Because, Val,” Vox said through gritted teeth. “We already tried that and it didn’t work.”

Vox stood up and started pacing the room, while Val stared at him foggily, taking a swig from his cigarette. His eyes fell on the knife wedged through a picture of Alastor. He grabbed it and pulled it out of the photo, examining it. The knife had little bumps and scratches on it from all the times Val had thrown temper tantrums and massacred his employees. They were all immortal, but Vox knew Valentino got some sort of sick pleasure from inflicting pain. 

“Uh, hey, boo-boo bear?” Val called, jolting him out of his thoughts. “Are you gonna just stare at that knife like a dominatrix, or are we gonna figure out how to kill Alastor?”

Vox’s eyebrows furrowed as he turned around slowly. He chuckled softly to himself, a dangerous sign. His voice dripped with bitterness. “I don’t want to K̴̳̿I̶̠͘L̸͎̕L̷̪͝ ̸͎̏h̷͇͋i̶̢͝m̶͔̑.” His face glitched with an unhinged expression. The anger that he tried so hard to suppress was surfacing. “I want R̵̻̈́E̷̠̚V̷̳̀Ë̵̹́N̷̳̏Ǵ̶͜Ë̶͕ for what he did to me.” Vox’s voice glitched again and started to echo. “He deserves much worse than death.”

Val blinked, looking confused. Vox had only ever told him that Alastor rejected his business deal. Everything else about their relationship had been a secret, locked away under Vox’s picture-perfect, smiling facade. But now, Vox was looming over him, fists clenched, face manic, and the truth was slowly slipping out. “That fucking b̴̡̿ḯ̶͈ṫ̷̟c̵̘͑h̴̛̜ deserves to be ripped apart by sharks. He deserves to burn in a place much worse than H̴̛͖e̴̙͝l̴̘͗l̶̪̿.” Vox walked over to Valentino, clutching the knife.

Val scrambled up off the couch, panicking slightly. It was rare to see Vox lose his temper, and there was no telling what he would do. “Mi amor…” Val tried to reason with him. “Put down the knife please, baby.”

Vox laughed wildly, his eyes glowing with insanity. “YOU DON’T GET IT, DO YOU?” He threw the knife, missing Valentino by less than an inch. It flew across the room and stuck in the wall on one of Val’s sexy posters. “NOBODY GETS IT!”  Vox yelled, electricity buzzing through him as his screen overheated. He always overheated when he experienced a too-strong emotion. Another reason why he made sure to keep his feelings in check. “NOBODY UNDERSTANDS, BECAUSE ALL THEY SEE IS THE Ṛ̴̑Ả̷̼D̷̬̃Ï̶̱O̶̞͝ ̶̅͜D̸̙̿E̶̥͠M̵̩̚O̸̼̓N̵̙̉!” He pointed at Alastor’s picture on the wall. Val was backed up against the door, looking frightened. “THEY DON’T SEE THE SCARED LITTLE FRENCH BOY, ALONE AND SCARED IN HELL! THE ONE WHO HAD NOTHING, AND I GAVE HIM EVERYTHING! HE WAS MY FRIEND! THAT LOUSY Ṕ̴̺I̷͚̎E̴̘̊C̴͓͝E̸̟̽ ̸͍̆Ơ̸̬F̸̩͋-”

“Sir?” Baxter’s voice made him stop.

Vox froze, and for the first time, he realized that he was practically on top of Valentino, who was cowering on the floor. He stepped back, and was aware of the whirring in his head. He was seriously overheated. He turned to Baxter, who was clutching a clipboard nervously. “What the fuck do you want?” he snarled. 

“I’m sorry to bother you, Sir.” Baxter seemed to shrink under Vox’s glare. “But there’s something you need to see.”

Vox exhaled loudly and put a hand in his face is exasperation. “Yeah. Okay. Just- gimme a minute, please.”

“Of course, Sir.” Baxter closed the door, looking eager to escape. 

Ignoring Val, Vox sat down on the couch and closed his eyes, taking deep breaths. He tried to cool himself down. He couldn’t afford a power shortage, not now. His mind was still racing. He was trying not to fall apart, but it was so hard. Alastor returned and all of the pent up feelings that he had tried so hard to hide were spilling out. And now…he just felt like a kid again. A scared, young man who was dropped into hell after being crushed by a flat-screen TV in New York. 

He felt so…helpless. Like the world was just tossing him around like a beach ball, and he couldn’t do anything about it. Like Alastor could hurt him over and over again and never have to pay for it. Like he would never be more than a lying businessman who capitalized off of the suffering of others.

But that’s Hell, isn’t it? Eat or be eaten, kill or be killed. Alastor had taught him that. Vox took a deep breath, trying not to think about the Radio Demon. Fuck, he thought. I’m still overheated. God, I’m a fucking mess. 

He felt something cool on his forehead. He opened his eyes. Valentino was there, pressing a damp rag to Vox’s screen, a soft look on his face. It wasn’t sympathetic, exactly. But it was something. Vox sighed with relief as Val wiped his head slowly, feeling himself cool down. Subconsciously, he leaned into his partner’s hand like a moth to a light.

They sat there in silence for a few minutes, and Vox relaxed under the rhythm of Valentino’s hand. Val knew his body like the back of his hand. They had had sex more times than he could count. But Vox couldn’t ever remember being touched by Valentino like this, in a way that was caring, gentle, and almost loving. It had always been dirty or vulgar, rushed and forced. Vox never had much interest in sex, but he did it to make Val happy. 

Vox looked over at the moth demon, who was still wiping him gently. He knew they were nothing more than sex partners. If things ever got intense, Val would choose himself over Vox. And Vox would do the same. Wouldn’t I? 

At the end of the day, Val stuck with him. Out of loyalty, or not. And Vox couldn’t call it love, exactly, but he had some sort of connection with him. They understood each other, at the very least. They both knew what it was like to start at the bottom of the food chain, and work their way up. And they both knew what it was like to be afraid of losing what they had built.

Val took the rag off of Vox’s screen and set it down. “Better?” he asked. His voice was much quieter than usual. Vox nodded. “Much.” Val smiled, and all of a sudden, his momentary softness evaporated. “Good. Now you can’t make fun of me for being hotheaded, you little cunt.”

Vox rolled his eyes and shoved Val away. “Shut the fuck up.” He stood up and walked away briskly, calling over his shoulder. “I’m gonna go see what Baxter wanted to show me.”

“Okay, bye Daddy!” Valentino called out obnoxiously.

Vox opened the door to the security camera room, where Baxter was sitting, hunched over a computer and looking stressed. “Let’s get this over with.” Vox flopped down in his bright blue chair in front of a large television. 

“Of course, Sir.” Baxter pushed his glasses up his nose and frantically typed something out on his keyboard. A moment later, the security footage from camera #19 was up on the big screen. It showed the view of the Hazbin Hotel, newly rebuilt. Vox bounced his leg, annoyed. “Baxter, why are you showing me this fuck-ass hotel?” Impressive they built it so fast.

“Sir, look.” Baxter pointed at the screen. There, walking up to the hotel with no apparent concern for his surroundings, was- “Holy shit. Is that-” Vox leaned forward as the demon shifted, just enough to reveal the front of his robe. There, emblazoned across his chest, was a giant “A”.

Vox chuckled with disbelief and sat back in his chair. The first man was in Hell.

Previous Masterpost

[ocd--culture-is]

questioning ocd culture but I don’t have or undiagnosed ocd but this is just ruining me + bothering me too much so I really hope u don’t mind me asking

Tw : s/h 

so these few months I’ve been having really violent + extreme intrusive thoughts that usually make me have a breakdown or panic attack. also I would constantly do self harm in a way to cope and to convince myself that those thoughts aren’t real at all and that I’m just faking it for attention. and then I usually feel like I’m going insane and that everything is going wrong because of me. I don’t know anymore. I think I may have ocd, but I’m scared of getting diagnosed cause I don’t want my parents to find out. Not asking for a diagnosis here but what do you think these things sound like? 

 feel like I’m overreacting. sorry. if u ever feel offended or uncomfortable, just delete this ask 

Don't worry, you're not "overreacting" in any way, these thoughts and behaviours really are frustating and hard to deal with! Neither is this offensive, you're just trying to figure out why you feel the way you do, or think or behave, ect. I don't mind things like these! So feel free to ask and or dm me on here or my main, I'll try my best to help in any way I can. Butttt I'm not a psychiatrist or anything of that sort, so don't rely too much on me

I'm really bad with long texts, so bear with me; I'm sorry if I skip over something ALSO I'M REALLY SORRY THIS IS SO LONG. I don't know how to shorten it, I'm sorry. (Hopefully you aren't like me and don't have trouble with paragraphs)

Intrusive thoughts, let's start with that, while they are very common in OCD, many disorders have it as a symptom. Also to not forget that people w/o disorders may also get them once in a while. It seems to me, you're reacting heavily to these thoughts, which means there is most definitely something more to it. I can't tell you what it might be, it could be OCD if compulsions are present as well as some of the other symptoms/criteria, but it could also be something else.

As for the sh part, it might be a temporary coping mechanism but it's not gonna help or change your thoughts in any way There's safer mechanisms out there to help, that could maybe also help with the intrusive thoughts in a way, my dms are always open to help come up with alternatives. I won't get further about that cause it's not something you really asked and I can get how frustating it sometimes is if someone goes "stop sh'ing!!! it bad" as if you do it for fun, and you probably know it's not a healthy way to cope.

Also, I've said this before in a post (?) but feeling like you're faking it for attention or for any reason does not immediately mean you are actually faking it. Your mind is just convincing you otherwise. You can't struggle with something that does not exist; if these thoughts weren't real or if you were faking them, you would not struggle with them in any way or go crazy cause of them.