#sorry! not fic related just. me thinking related

[ellieslittleslutt]

Late Nights

cw: fluff?? vi calls reader cupcake and princess once but that expected. some vague mentions of insomnia i guess.

a/n: uhm so first vi fic that’s wild, defo going to write more roommate vi bc im yearning and i need her so bad it’s not even funny.

wc- 0.5k

🐛°‧🍂⋆.ೃ࿔*:･───────────────

you had problems with sleeping sometimes. wether it was going to bed at a reasonable time or even just getting a deep sleep it was always a problem with you.

tonight was no exception. you were lounging on the couch of your guys’ apartment, doom scrolling on tiktok mindlessly liking whatever you found the slightest bit relatable. it’s was around 1 am which wasn’t too bad but still not ideal. on the coffee table sat a your favorite mug full of sleepytime tea in hopes that it would coax you back to sleep, but like every other time it never worked and didn’t even taste that good.

you were huddled up in the blankets when you saw your pink haired roommate coming out of her room, hair messed up wearing sleep shorts and a sports bra. she didn’t notice you at first in the dark, but then she accidentally sat down on you causing you to yelp smacking her arm “vi get off of me” you groaned.

“shit sorry princess” she mumbled half asleep scooting over. that god damn nickname always got you. you huffed going back to your phone “why’re you up?” you mumbled glancing at her. “i could ask you the same thing hm?” she hums sipping your tea “eugh fuck, this taste like dirty cardboard water” her face in a tight frown putting the mug down. “why do you think it’s half full idiot”

she leaned back against the couch sighing “so wait why’re you up?” she asked glancing over at you. “couldn’t sleep” you hummed resting your head against your elbow looking at her “and you?”“fucking jayce kept calling me” she mumbled with a yawn “asking about how to get bitches.” you chuckled softly shaking your head “viktor?” you asked “you know it.”

you hummed looking over at her kind of star struck by how she looked. you swear you had cartoon heart eyes beating out of your eye sockets. she looked at you with a soft smile patting your shin “wanna watch a movie?” she asks snapping you out of your trance and you just nodded clearing your throat “oh yeah” you said awkwardly pushing yourself up reaching for the remote.

you two both agreed on mean girls because why the fuck not. you sat closer to her your head slowly lolling itself onto her shoulder, vi looked down at you wrapping an arm around you so that you don’t slump down “you’re gonna hurt your neck if you fall asleep like that” she whispered rubbing your arm.

you hummed sleepily in response your lashes resting against your cheeks. vi made the connection that you weren’t going to get back to bed on your own so she paused the movie, and got up slowly lifting you into her arms to carry you back to your room lying you back down onto your blankets tucking you into how you liked.

you don’t know why but just for some reason you felt comfortable around vi, more relaxed and like your self. this is one of the few nights you fell asleep before 3 am and without a melatonin.

vi walked to the door turning off the lamp “night cupcake” she said softly before shutting the door walking off to her room.

from that night on vi would meet you in the couch just so you could yes fall asleep in her arms, totally platonic though… right?

🐛°‧🍂⋆.ೃ࿔*:･───────────────

@autisticintr0vert wifey: @bugbit3ss

[deqdlyowl]

I actually have some old doodles TPtR au related... This one portrays an event from the second chapter.

I have a few more things, but they're kinda spoilers and I'm not really into spoiling... Though one of them is just a spoiler of one interesting detail I want to add (the event my sketch shows most likely won't appear in the fic), while the other one is a WHOLE AHH SPOILER of the shit happening in, maybe like 10+ chapter, I'm still not sure how big I want to make the fic, ahaha.

Also rambling and venting out my feelings under the cut because I forgot to take my meds yesterday. You don't have to read but I would be happy if you do.

.

Every time I start something I like, it begins to feel like a small obligation after some time, no matter how I feel about the thing I create. I love my fic and I really want to finish it, because it's also a huge emotional boost for me when I understand that I passed my word count goal in the chapter and I finally can write down my 24/7 daydreaming about CotL (even if not all of them, I often think about selfship, sorry, ahaha),AND I have a nice feedback. BUT. My ability is to abandon things. I have many unfinished drawings, unfinished crafts, like, a crocheted Spycrab or a full-sized HHH tf2 weapon, even though I really want to finish it all, but since I took a really long break, I just abandoned it all. That's usually the reason why I don't make comics. (The only comic I've ever made is that one silly meme about bees). And a month ago I started writing TPtR.

I'm scared of this happening to my fic, that's why I force myself to write if I'm not doing so for more than two days. Somehow it boosts my motivation, but at the same time, the thought of having to force myself to do something, even if I love it, makes me anxious. Why am I not doing anything if I love it? Perhaps it's just my depression with AuDHD kicking in, and sometimes I forget to take my ADs (I don't have ADHD meds yet) that makes me suddenly apathetic about everything. And then anxiety. And then I get sad when I can't come up with words.

Today I was describing the thing I have no experience in. I made tonnes of research, watched many videos of how people do it, tried to find words, but it looks... Meh. And I'm sad. And when I'm sad about something I do, I abandon it. BUT I WON'T. I will force myself to not, because I still want to write! I try to reassure myself that it looks shitty because it's still a draft and written in my native language. However, if looking at my current word count, the chapter won't be short, and it makes me happy. I'm sad and happy. I'm confused about my feelings about what I do!! I can just abandon doing ANYTHING and be lazy for years as it happened in middle school! But I have to force myself. To do anything at all. I already bed rot when I'm not studying, and if I'm studying at home, I still do it in bed. I'm losing weight (I'm severely underweight), my dogs feel bad (they're almost 12), it's my final year in school so I also study hard for my finals, my dreams say weird things (I believe in dream-telling or whatever, and I kinda can decipher them) and it all devours me from inside. But I can't give myself a rest. Or. I'll. Abandon. The thing. I love!

I'm repeating, but my head repeats everything most of the time as well, it's either loud and messy (adhd) or quiet and agonizing (autism), my ADs make my body parts twitch, I don't think that I need my therapist anymore, because it feels like there's no different between me before and me after talking to her.

I love my friends though. Their cheerful reaction to my fic or sketch updates is something that also boosts my motivation of doing something. I love art because of the feeling of creating something, but after finishing, I get the desire to see someone's reaction to what I did.

That's all, I think. I mean, not all, but I don't want to repeat again and again, my memory is getting worse as well, I feel like I kin Shamura ahahahha. I want to take an MRI. What if I have a tumor.

[hcdragonwrites]

When I get home today I think I will also translate what I’ve written over to Ao3- ONCE I ASK FOR PERMISSION

I saw a post a few days ago of a very good author on here who’s blog got reported and they almost lost all their writing — like that terrifies me not because of the ban but because all those beautiful words would be lost and no one could read them anymore. I i just have to ask all the people I’ve wrote for so far if it’s ok to post their gifts on my ao3 that’s so dusty and old. I would rather have it be available if anything terrible like that occurred for the public but I have to ask because. Well. It’s for them- and for the people that enjoy the artwork and AUs all these artists lovingly craft. But it’s time for me to get to work so I’ll see what and when I get off

[oleryn]

dan and phil have proven themselves to be fans of freakish gay arthaus horror movie stuff with their dnpc universe and whatever the hell dan was on when he wrote The Urge so in my head ive created this fake short horror film starring them wherein phil dies and his body is possessed by this creature that retains all of phil’s memories and simply wants to live as him normally but dan knows he’s a fake and HE knows he’s a fake and so dan is stuck in this emotional saw trap incapable of telling anyone without sounding insane and forced to grapple with the grief of phil’s death while 99% of phil is standing right in front of him BUT his only other option is to force the creature out of phil’s body and thereby live the rest of his life alone with none of phil at all so eventually he just gives in and lives with this fake phil and no one knows but him. a soul is small dan. very very small.

[odo-apologist]

Me enjoying a rewatch of a Red Dwarf episode, having a good time: 🙂

My traitorous brain: Hey, this scene takes place away from Red Dwarf and Starbug, Lister probably doesn't remember it after M-Corp

Me: 😧

[crownedwille]

.

[my-thoughts-and-junk]

the father [solar lunacy] the son [you move to dayshift but aren't paid any more, go figure] and the holy spirit [i see you, sundrop!]

[luc1ferian]

Hi I'm thinking about writing a h2g2 and gravity falls crossover fic. I saw your post awhile ago and I was wondering if you had any idea on how the two fords would interact.

Oooh this is a really good idea!

Hm, I haven't properly watched Gravity Falls in a while (I KNOW IM SORRY), but comparing their personalities from what i know they have a couple similarities and differences.

For first interactions I'm not entirely sure how or where, neither of them are naturally social but if someone were to start a conversation it would be Prefect, and once they realize they're both named Ford P. they'd hit off perfectly.

I think they'd love to go out for a small drink and talk about their outlooks on life, about space, their own traumas and relationships, about their research and studies with their respective books (Pines to the Journals, and Prefect to the Guide), and about their plans for future. This interaction could also be a lot funnier depending on the tone you wanted to take.

Ooooh they could also rant about their annoying family members (Zaphod and Stan)

They would also engage in an epic game of Dungeons & More Dungeons no doubt

[thegrantwater]

new fic alert!!! new fic alert!!!

finally posting something after almost another year long hiatus from writing. i got a little more in depth about where i've been and what it's been like to write this in the end notes of the fic, so if you're curious go there, but i'll definitely be posting about it on here soon. so in the meantime....

we fill the gaps (you and me make three) chapter 1 is posted on my ao3! i've been dropping little hints about it for months, and my story for last years sqsn was the main driving point behind this fic (and yes the title for both fics comes from the same song, in my mind strange birds is a predecessor or sort of outline to this). the intro of strange birds was actually ripped straight from the draft for this, because i started rewriting season 1 almost two years ago and at the time had written some pre-henry-curse regina analysis to tie into it. this first chapter covers the events of s1e1 to about s1e19, and the rest of s1 up to the curse breaking will be chapter 2. consider its length both a treat and a warning that this is going to take a while.

love you guys <3

[pynkhues]

just came out if loustat ao3 tag... maaaaan it does look bleak for bottom lestat enjoyers. my feed is literally just "bottom louis bottom louis feminization mpreg abo bottom louis"... and so on ad nauseam

sophie you are my only hope :')

It's certainly a fandom with preferences, haha

[amnestyliketaz]

never not fucked up thinking about normal and henry.

because GOD henry was so full of love and compassion and understanding for his family and the people he loved and he should be there to tell norm that it’s ok that he’s proud of him that he loves him that he thinks teeny is cool that he likes his cheers and his weird theatre friend and.

just. henry should be there. normal deserves to be unconditionally loved and henry would make sure he felt it

[houliburns]

[fitzrove]

Nothing like lying in bed sick w a bad cold and having gender thoughts 😂😭

[tankgotstuckinthecircusgate]

my biggest dissonance is how robert de niro in once upon a time in america actually looks like young carlo (but more handsome than carlo) but noodles character is nothing like him like max is a certifed carlo core. he would do everything max did

[charlottedabookworm]

Reveal because Noctis and Phe both have an allergy to this one very specific, weirdly uncommon thing. In fact, most LC have this allergy.

His best friend isn’t always smiling or anything, but it’s still weird to walk into class and see him scowling down at a sheet of paper. Phe is the most laidback guy Noctis knows - though maybe that isn’t hard, when his competition is Gladio and Iggy who are intense on a good day - and to see him visibly frustrated rather than just shrugging it off because things happen has him pausing for a heartbeat.

Then, because this is his best friend, Noct slips into the seat beside him with a nudge of their shoulders and a: “You alright?”

“I lost my medic alert tag.”

He blinks. “Your what?” He asks stupidly, even though he knows what a medic alert tag is. Why did Phe need a medic alert tag? Why didn’t he know? Fuck he’s a bad friend what if Phe had had an accident or there had been an emergency and-

“It’s my own fault; I probably should have checked the bracelet before I went swimming in that lake with Aunt Lena but I forgot and it broke. Now I have to get a new one.”

“Makes sense,” Noct says slowly, glancing between Phe and the sheet of paper in front of him. “Is the form complicated or something?” His own tags are Citadel issued, after all, and have been for as long as he can remember. He has no idea how other people even get them.

“Nah, the thing I’m allergic to is just- complicated as anything to spell and it doesn’t even look like a real word. look at this thing, Noct!”

A piece of paper is shoved under his nose.

Noct bites back the urge to sneeze, the edge tickling at his skin, and grabs it to pull it away from his face and-

He freezes.

“Are you sure that’s what you’re allergic to?” The words taste like mud on his tongue as he stares at the complicated string of letters printed carefully on the page.

The very familiar string of letters.

Phe rolls his eyes, a grin flashing across his lips. “I know, right! It doesn’t even sound like a real thing, but apparently it’s a sedative of some kind? My dad’s allergic real bad to it so they tested me when I was a baby and ta-da!”

Huh, he thinks.

“Meds always have annoying names like that,” he says, still staring at the string of letters on the page.

If he pulled his own alert tag out from underneath his shirt, he’d see the same word, etched into the metal. It’s not that weird. It can’t be. Loads of people share allergies.

It doesn’t mean anything.

Just- Noct remembers his doctors talking about how rare being allergic to this specific medication is. So rare there’s not even any numbers on it.

He’s never even heard of anyone being allergic to it outside him and his dad, and even with them the doctors don’t think it’s a true allergy. More… their magic reacting badly to it.

“Noct?”

What are the odds of Phe and his father both being allergic to that one specific medication?

“Noct, you alright?”

A hand lands on his arm.

He blinks.

Phe stares at him, a frown on his lips, blue eyes dark with concern and-

Oh.

I need to speak to dad.

[catboydan]

fiance got me a kindle for my birthday <3