#so we were all feeling very satisfied with the outcomes

[doomspaniels]

~Outtakes from Slipper Hunting~

Tristan, Tris, you're looking for The Other. Not taking this one. Right, go on, thank you.

Gwyn! You found o--Gwyn? Honey, what are you doing? Are you okay?

[kingconia]

Listen listen listen, housewarden's giving you their jacket bc your cold's reactions to you holding onto their arm like a koala after receiving the jacket

(P.s. the way you write is just so awesome it's like if you were born in ancient Greece you'd be writing mythological classics)

A/N: Ah! That is the most flattering, heartwarming words about my writing style I had ever heard... I can't thank you enough for this, dear.

I also hope that I understood your request correctly.

HOUSEWARDENS GIVING YOU THEIR JACKET BECAUSE YOU WERE COLD

Riddle Rosehearts. ❤️

— Riddle is, indeed, a very observing boyfriend. He notices the slightest discomfort in your actions, and so, it doesn't really take a lot of time from him to realise that you are getting cold;

— A gentleman he is, Riddle will instantly offer his own jacket. I think, he would be a very careful type of person, who takes it off, and actually extends it to you, instead of wrapping it around you freely;

— Once you accept, he feels very proud of himself! He is shining from the inside, and it means a lot for him that you accepted his help so easily! He is a good boyfriend, right?

— But he is a little surprised, when you cling into him all of the sudden... What is the meaning of it?

•

”Are you still cold?” Riddle frowns slightly, freezing on his place much like a statue. ”We can go back, in our dorm, and—”

”You are just so sweet,” you sigh out with a short smile on your face, pressing cheek to his arm. ”I can't help myself.”

His cheeks flare up instantly after hearing this. Whatever he planned to say doesn't matter now; Riddle can only awkwardly continue your walk, secretly satisfied by this sudden, yet pleasant outcome.

Leona Kingscholar. 💛

— Alright, I am sorry, but Leona doesn't really have warm clothes on himself on the daily basis? His body temperature is so high... And his only leather jacket is... Sleeveless;

— Nevertheless, he notices shifts in your body temperature even quicker than you do. He is a beastman, which means he can say a lot about your body, just by listening to your heartbeat and focusing on your smell;

— Since he doesn't have anything for you to offer, Leona suggests you the only warm thing he has. Himself. And by suggesting, I mean... He just hugs you from the behind, both of his arms hanging loosely around your neck;

— Leona doesn't expect you to cling on him and be so smug about it, though...

•

”...You are clingy,” he informs you as you rub your cheek against his smooth skin. ”And I am not your blanket, herbivore.”

Yet, as you can't see his face, Leona smirks. He knows that his body is hot—in many way than just one—and he is aware how welcoming his hugs must be in this cold. He originally expected more stammering and blushes, but you know what...

”Sure, Leona.”

...This is much better.

Azul Ashengrotto. 🩵

— Just as Riddle, he is very observing boyfriend. But I also think his care is more restless? He is overthinking everything, and overworrying about the smallest things, when it comes to you;

— As soon as you confirm his worst assumptions—yes, that you are a little bit cold; yes he is a drama queen—Azul becomes even more worried then before. You are his too fragile, but nevertheless, too valuable treasure in the world!

— Of course, he firstly offers you his jacket. Azul holds it out for you, so you could slip in it easily, and then carefully fixes the collar, and fasten the buttons, so you feel more comfortable in it;

— He is about to go and find something warm to drink or eat for you, when you surprise him by wrapping arms around him so suddenly...

•

”Angelfish?” He blinks, confusion painted on his face as he looks at you in a mild surprise. ”Is something wrong?”

With his free hand that you still didn't manage to capture, Azul leans to touch your forehead, trying to understand if you are suffering from a fever or anything else.

”No. Everything is perfect. And I have a perfect boyfriend,” you murmur softly against the fabric of his shirt. ”Thank you for taking care of me, Zul-Zul.”

His face softens instantly, and Azul can't help himself but to kiss you on the forehead. Ah, of course... That's it, you are just being soft.

”Sure, darling.”

Kalim Al-Asim. 🧡

— I like to think that Kalim himself always feels slightly feverish? He doesn't really feel cold, even if his body does. I am not sure how to explain this one;

— Nevertheless, Kalim is oblivious to his own understanding of the temperature. How can you expect him to understand yours? But don't worry, he makes it up for being a fussy boyfriend, who starts asking a thousand of questions as soon as he realises that you are cold;

— If it is your lucky day and Kalim has something warm to offer to you, he will!

— But if he accidentally forgets his uniform jacket... That could mean only one thing: you have to wait for Jamil.

•

”Ah, I am sorry... I keep forgetting things in dorm...” Kalim sighs quietly, trying to keep both of his arms up, in a imitation of the roof, as the sudden rain starts.

Instead of being saddened, you use the opportunity: you throw yourself on Kalim, wrapping arms around his stomach.

”Nothing can warm better than the hugs of true love,” you hum.

”Ah!” He instantly hugs you back, smiling widely. "Of course!”

(Jamil squints from the afar, noticing two familiar figure under the rain. Hissing, he grips umbrella even tighter.

”...Idiots,” he only murmurs, before fastening his steps.

He hates his work.)

Vil Schoenheit. 💜

— Vil is a very doting boyfriend. Sometimes it stays unnoticed by you, but he always looks out for you silently. He takes some pride in that, too;

— So, this time is not an exception: you don't even have time to confess about being cold, when Vil already helps you to put a very beautiful spring coat that he carried around all evening! Just for you;

— He instantly asks if you want scarf, or maybe, gloves, because he has them ready too! If anything, Vil also checked out the nearest cafe, so...

— You cut him through by merely clinging in his arm. Vil is not surprised, but he is slightly flustered. This is too straightforward for him, potato...

•

”Careful, would you?” He sighs, looking around, trying to see if you are alone. As he reassures himself that it is a safe zone, Vil instantly allows himself to smile more openly. ”Are you comfortable like this, potato? Or should I call you coala from now?”

Yet, Vil himself can't resist the urge to press cheek to the top of your head. As your soft hair tickle his sensitive skin, he chuckles softly.

”Call me whatever you want,” your voice comes out muffled as you bring yourself even closer to him. ”But I am going to be the lover of the best boyfriend in the world...”

Well, you are not wrong, but he still blushes slightly... How shameless.

Idia Shroud. 💙

— To your surprise, Idia is an observant boyfriend as well? Unless, he is a little bit too invested in rumbling about something, but all other time he checks on you constantly;

— Of course, he offers you his own hoodie. Though, Idia doesn't really like sharing clothes or anything at all, for you—and in such special occasions—he could do that;

— Idia helps you to put hoodie on, and jokingly pushes the hood on your face, snickering when you huff;

— But when he attempts to step away, and gets caught instead, Idia is... Speechless.

•

”H-hey?”

Idia saw that a countless times in anime and movies, but a mass-media is one thing, and a real life is a completely another!? He is not sure how to react, so he wouldn't look as a complete idiot!

”Are you comfortable?” You ask suddenly, in a very serious tone.

Idia nods enthusiastically. He is very normal about this.

”Cool.”

And with that, you nuzzle closer, closing your eyes. Oh, he tries to relax too, but... From the sound of his heart beating fastly, you could say it didn't end well...

Malleus Draconia. 💚

— Malleus always forgets about humans feeling weather differently, to be honest. He tries to look after you more thoroughly, but he can't find a golden line between an ”proper care” and ”too-worried pestering”;

— When you admit, after hours of night walking around statues of gargoyles, that you are a little cold, Malleus feels guilty for not noticing it earlier;

— Of course, he instantly offers you his jacket, in the most delicate and gentle way possible. Also asks if you want him to put in the fire your surroundings, so you could feel warmer;

— Instead, you wrap both of your arms around his right one. And he, honestly, is very confused...

•

”I believe, the temperature of my body is not that warm to help you here, the child of man...”

Yet, you look so peaceful, that Malleus unconsciously puts his free hand atop of your head, stroking your hair gently.

”Ah, but what about this warm heart of yours, Malleus?” You smirk, winking at him with the unhidden amusement as you say it.

Malleus can say that the tip of his ears are getting red. A soft sigh escapes his lips, and despite everything, he can't resist the urge to smile back at you.

”...If it keeps you warm, my dear.”

[just-a-ghost00]

Crush series : What would happen if you confessed your feelings?

This reading is to be used with caution. Tarot is a tool to highlight possibilities. As energies are constantly in movement, no outcome is ever set in stone. Thus, always use your discernment when consuming such content.

Group 1 - Why do you still love me? Temperance, Ace of pentacles, 2 of wands, the Wheel of fortune

I get that for many of you, the person you’re thinking about has no idea about your feelings for them. You may have tried to give them signals but it seems like either this person ignored them or were not able to read them. So you confessing your feelings would definitely surprise them and throw them off. At first, they would be intimidated. They would possibly doubt the sincerity of your words. But quickly, they would try to see the brighter side of things and would feel curious about what this heralds for both of you. Eventually, they would want to give this connection a try. I feel like this person would tip toe around the matter for fear that it could stop at any moment and be taken away from them. I feel like this person is not used to things going in their favor so every time something good happens to them they automatically raise their guards up and doubt it is real. I feel like they would be giddy about it and when they’d be alone, they’d definitely feel excited but they wouldn’t show it in front of you. It would take time for this person to fully open up and trust you. But overall the outcome feels rather positive for this group.

Signs : Sagittarius, Taurus, Scorpio, Aquarius, Leo

Group 2 - Long as we keep this low key

Lovers, ace of wands, king of swords, Judgment

This person wouldn’t hesitate compared to group 1. I feel like this is a long time coming. This person was possibly waiting for you to make a move because they were unable to. I feel like they would give in to the connection right away, but only on a physical level. Emotionally, they would still feel distant because this person fears intimacy oddly enough. Being close physically isn’t a problem to them but having someone deeply understanding them and caring for them scares the shit out of them. This person isn’t fond of grand gestures and being vulnerable in front of others. They are the type of person that would keep a relationship private, even to their family. It could be that this person is already committed to someone else, for some of you. If not that, maybe it is a matter of reputation or acceptance among peers. Either way, I feel like the connection with them might not be as fulfilling as you’d hope. But they’d answer somewhat positively to it.

Signs : Gemini, Scorpio, Aquarius, Aries

Group 3 - Amazing grace

2 of wands, 3 of pentacles, 6 of pentacles, 7 of wands

I feel like right from the get go this person would be very happy about your confession. Out of the 3 groups this feels like the most sane and healthy reaction. They would be cautious about it but they wouldn’t feel ashamed or fearful of what you feel for them. They seem very open minded and accepting of your point of view. This person would quickly think of ways to make this work for both of you. They would want to get to know you better, to find a balance between your expectations and theirs. They would be planning every step of the relationship because it matters to them and they feel like they have to protect what you share at all costs. This is a person that doesn’t want you to regret choosing them. They want to feel worthy of your attention and care. They want to honor your feelings. They could feel a bit stressed sometimes because of the pressure they put on themselves to impress and satisfy you. Their intentions would be very good and pure. I get a very lovely energy from this group.

Signs: Taurus, Virgo, Leo

[honeygrahambitch]

"You're quiet." Will observed while pretending to be busy with smelling the flavour of the wine in his glass.

"Does that bother you?" Hannibal asked, not lifting his eyes from his Ipad. The answer felt slightly confrontational but overall genuine.

"It's just, unlike you."

"If I started speaking, you wouldn't be fond of what's on my mind. Let's not dwell on this anymore, shall we?"

Will's not-yet-husband senses screamed that he was in danger and that he should walk carefully.

"Avoiding the elephant in the room is even more unlike you. The fact that you are not looking at me as well. You usually look at me, Hannibal." Will said, leaning over the table.

Hannibal put his Ipad on the table and obeyed Will's request. He looked at him.

"Wh- What...have you been crying?"

"I often do when I feel powerless. Even more if I feel powerless and left out at the same time." Hannibal confessed.

"May I know what happened?" Will asked and realized his own voice didn't sound as brave as it did in the beginning. Of course the only reason Hannibal would cry for would be frustration.

He is used to things going his way.

Hannibal turned on the Ipad again, did some scrolling and then pushed the Ipad to Will on the table.

Will grabbed it and started reading but stopped after the first few lines of the news article.

"So this has to do with the case I worked on yesterday?"

"It has to do with the way you started negotiating with someone holding a gun to your head after telling the snipers and SWAT teams to drop their weapons."

"I knew he wouldn't press the trigger, he was just a scared boy. I wanted to avoid his death."

"You wanted to avoid his death by having him cause yours? Very smart, Will." Hannibal remarked. Will wanted to say something but Hannibal went on. "Do you remember what he told you when his gun was pressed against your temple? Many articles cited his exact words."

"That he wouldn't cause any harm if he killed me because the Bureau would replace me in a second."

Hannibal nodded. "See, Will, he was right. Jack has lost ponies before, it would take him only a few months before he would find someone smart enough to do his dirty work."

Will decided to say nothing and keep listening.

"And do you remember what you said yesterday after you survived this incident? You came here, you were really satisfied with how it went. You didn't give me any details and I really believed it was just an ordinary day at work. And the reason you didn't give me any detail is because you don't actually care about how close you were to losing your life."

"I had it under control."

"You did not. It was not even your job to negotiate. You told the official negotiator to let you take care of it. While you had a pipe pressed to your temple."

"I am confused. Are you mad because I didn't tell you about this or because I risked my life?"

"I am mad because you made me worry. I have huge faith in you and your resourcefulness and strength. I have hardly ever been worried about you. However this situation...caused me great distress."

"Did you spend the whole night reading all the articles on that?"

"Not the whole night. Half of it. I was busy during the second half."

Will frowned. Then it made sense.

"The guy who almost blew my brains... he was in the kidney pie." He phrased it as a statement and not as a question because he knew he was right.

Hannibal sighed. "I needed some sort of control. After I killed him I realized that I would have done exactly the same thing if he had killed you. Which made me realize I still had zero control over the outcome."

"If he had killed me, the FBI would have killed him before you got a chance to do so."

The thought made Hannibal spiral even more.

"I can't change what happened. But, I am sorry you were worried." Will said as he was observing the dark bags under Hannibal's eyes. A rare sight. "I take it the the articles didn't cite what I told him while he was deciding whether to shoot or not? I wasn't loud enough for anyone else to hear."

"No." Hannibal replied thoughtfully. "What did you tell him?"

"I said that while the Bureau would indeed replace me in a second, I have someone at home who is waiting for me." Will answered. "I told him I mean so much to you that you wouldn't be able to replace me. I told him that I am stupidly in love. I told him that by killing me, he is ruining us both."

Hannibal remained petrified.

Will was in fact aware of how much he meant to him. His confession did not make what he did less stupid but it changed something.

"Is that so?" Hannibal whispered as he reached for the bottle of Cabernet.

"It obviously is. I'm wondering if what you did was in fact more stupid than what I did."

"How so?"

"You read a few articles, you threw a little tantrum because you could not play God, you cried then you went to murder the guy. Then you didn't feel better so you started crying again."

"Rough night." Hannibal commented, a bit amused by the fact that Will had accurately described his night.

"I'm staying here tonight."

"You don't have to, darling." Hannibal said, still reflecting on the lovely things Will had said about him.

"No, I will stay. You might discover what happened today at work and I'm not letting you spiral again."

"What hap-"

"Were you saying you made Tiramisu?"

[teal-fiend]

Mistakes Happen

Content: vore, accidental digestion, unwilling prey,

Summary: A pred who has bad coping skills

–

The dim light of your living room flickers against the recently cleaned, dark wood floors. It’s late, and you’d intended for tonight to be a bit of fun—for you. Not for your guest. 

You didn’t mean anything malicious by it, you just wanted to prove a point. You look down at your stomach, still flat, knowing that’s about to change. 

Your guest sits nervously on the couch, shifting under your gaze. Your stomach growls in anticipation, as if it could read your thoughts. 

You had lured them into your home under the pretense of dinner. You suspected that they wanted more, and they would get more. But probably not the ‘more’ that they wanted. 

This prey was someone who you didn’t get along with (you didn’t get along with them. They seemed very… attached to you). But for the sake of other people, you need to get over it. And you had your methods. Tonight you were going to give them a good scare. They'd back off after learning what you are.

You had no intention of making this permanent, so to speak. You didn’t like digesting prey anyway. You preferred to trap them in your belly for a little while, feel them struggle for their life, and then let them out. All’s well. 

“Are you hungry?” Your soon-to-be-prey jokes. They heard your stomach too.

“No,” you say, with a grin. And it’s true; you don’t do this out of hunger.

They have a nervous laugh, glancing up at you. "You sure?"

They also notice the look in your eyes, how you’re inching closer, and how your stomach is still growling. Not adept at subtlety. Do they know what’s about to happen? It doesn’t matter-

"Promise." You stretch your mouth, testing. Feeling the familiar sensation as your jaw loosens, preparing for what comes next. 

The whole process is smooth—you’ve done this a lot. Your guest doesn’t put up much resistance, either or you’ve gotten too good at this. You swallow them down, bit by bit, enjoying the slight struggle. You welcome the familiar feeling of satisfaction that surges through you as your belly starts to swell, expanding with their form. When you finally gulp down the last of them, you pat your now round, firm gut. Your skin stretches tight, and you feel every slight movement from inside.

"There we go," you sigh, running your hand over your belly. Your prey squirm and push against the confines of your body. They’re in there, safe—not that they know it.

You settle back into your chair, resting a hand on your full belly, letting out a small, satisfied burp. A part of you feels giddy about it all. You showed them you could do it, that they were nothing but prey if you wanted them to be. But now… now you have to let them back out. You give your stomach a firm rub, feeling it churn beneath your fingers.

"See? Not so bad," you mutter, as your prey seems to realise the environment isn’t so hostile - Their predator has the stomach on a tight leash. There are no acids out and about right now.

Although you can feel your stomach’s eagerness. It wants to digest. Very badly. You feel it sizing up the prey, squeezing it gently, savouring it. You don’t want to tease it for much longer. 

"… guess I’ll let you out now." You say this out loud, but you sit for a moment longer. Basking in the post-meal afterglow. Observing your stomach as it cradles the prey, gentle because it is obedient. Like a dog balancing a treat on its nose. You smile, and give it a good pat. Enough fun for one night- 

Except, as you sit there, the weight of your belly presses down on you. Warmth pooling through you from the meal, your eyelids start to droop. It wasn’t meant to feel this cozy. The way your gut rests on your lap, heavy and comforting, it tugs at your fatigue.

You yawn. Your brain briefly registers that this is a mistake, but your body pulls you toward sleep like the tide. Inevitable, nothing can be done to stop what is about to happen. This outcome may have been sealed the moment you came up with the idea. You lean back, letting your hands come to rest on your stomach, and before you know it, you’re out.

unbeknownst to the unconscious you, your stomach continues to ungulate as the prey squirms. They become increasingly concerned about your unresponsiveness. As your heart rate and breathing slows, the noises from your belly grow louder, and the squirming intensifies. You don’t have as much control over your stomach while you’re asleep.

---

When you wake up, it’s dark. The house is silent, except for soft gurgling noises coming from your midsection. You blink, groggy, the weight of your belly immediately plain to you.

Reflexively, you let out a thick, rumbling belch. That didn’t sound… good. You get the sense that you may have fucked up.

You swallow hard, a slight twinge of dread settling inside your chest as you rub your eyes and look down. 

Your stomach has changed. No longer tight and firm with clear contours of your prey’s figure. It’s soft and heavy, resting against your lap like a large, overstuffed pillow. You blink, pressing a hand to it. It doesn’t push back. There’s no movement. Only softness, warmth, and the unmistakable sound of digestion; deep, slow, and languid, resonating from within.

"God damn it…" you mutter through gritted teeth, pressing both hands to your rounded stomach. You shake it, hoping for a sign, a twitch—anything. But your stomach is eerily calm. Content.

They’re gone.

“Fuck,” you hiss to yourself. You’re a predator; this is what your body does. You know you’re playing with fire when you put your preferred prey inside your predatory stomach.

But you should have control - if only you hadn’t fallen asleep, this wouldn’t have happened. But now… your guest has processed inside of you, and you’re left with the aftermath: a swollen, satisfied gut and a persistent weight of guilt. Condemning the prey to such a fate. And some disappointment in yourself too.

You groan, pushing yourself up to your feet. The weight of your stomach pulls you forward, making each step a little more laboured than usual. This is why you don’t like to let your stomach go all the way. And you don’t like knowing that it got the better of you.

You hate this—feeling heavy, burdened, unable to hide what’s happened. You dread the questions and comments that will be coming your way in the following days.

Padding into the kitchen, you put the kettle on. Tea, to clear your head, and help settle your rebellious stomach. It churns, hard at work, the digestion well underway, but you feel heavy, slow. You grumble under your breath, hands trailing over your large gut with annoyance.

"This wasn’t supposed to happen," you mutter. "I wasn’t hungry."

The kettle whistles, and you pour the hot water into a mug, steeping the tea as you stand there, absently rubbing the swell of your belly. You take a deep breath, calming your nerves, but the weight of what you’ve done (and what you now carry) lingers.

"Great," you mutter, sarcastic, taking a sip of the tea. "Now what?

You can’t exactly reverse what happened. Your body’s already claimed the meal, leaving you with the consequences. The mass in your belly hangs there, undeniable evidence of your mistake. You scowl, irritated that your stomach exploited your nap.

"Not like I can explain this to anyone," you grumble, leaning back against the counter. You take a curious, calculated glance at your jutted out stomach, wondering how you can make this bulge look less suspicious. 

This could land you in serious trouble. You weren’t supposed to digest them—only spook them a little. But this was too far, and you’ll be dragging around this heavy belly for the next few days. It will be comically obvious; You invited this person over for ‘dinner’. You ate them - you digested them. Everyone’s going to think you did it on purpose. That you were so petty that instead of being an adult and getting along, you ate them. Classic move. 

Next time you show your face, you'll be asked if you’ve seen the prey, because didn’t you invite them over? No-one’s seen them since. Concerning, don't you think? - They’ll see your gut, and know exactly what happened. You won’t be able to argue it was an accident. You grimace in embarrassment at the thought. 

“I hope you’re happy, you bastard,” you say, looking down at your stomach. It offers a noisy grumble, perhaps in reply. You feel a flare of affection towards it, which you are quick to squash. You’re still annoyed.

You can get ahead of this. Send a few texts, apologise. Beg them to understand it was an accident - you fell asleep - but you take full responsibility for your actions. It won’t be a perfect fix, but you can do damage control.

There is a lingering smidge of relief in knowing that you won’t have to deal with your prey's antics anymore. They were deep in your gut now, stored away, gone forever. That was a nice thought. But this wasn’t the way to deal with your problems. You cannot let it happen again.

[gem-de-lune]

Daily Vibe Check 11/07

Seunghan

Hanged Man + 10 of Swords + Ace of Swords (Strongest Emotion)

Again, he is facing similar energy these days. A waiting for the signal. There is some fear bubbling up though, some anxiety around the situation. But that fear is kind of extinguished with a certain excitement for the whole ordeal tdealtover and dealt with very soon. With his strongest emotion here being thebAce of Swords, he is experiencing something like an emotional breakthrough. Internally he is developing himself and rebuilding a lot of lost confidence. His mind his clear and he knows what he must do.

What is he expecting to happen within the next few days?

King of Pentacles + Chariot + 9 of Pentacles (his reaction)

He is anticipating a deal of sorts, perhaps a contract for investment of his time and future. This, along with the Chariot does indicate some positive omens in regards to his potentially rejoining the group. (Again, the 7 card Chariot pops out) and with the 9 of Pentacles being his reaction to this ordeal, it does indicate he is satisfied with the outcome and the work it took to get there both internal within himself and externally as a lot of people supported him.

What is SMs current stance on the Seunghan issue?

3 of Chalices + Queen of Swords

They are meticulously planning, still. There are indicators that it is a small team that is managing whatever plans are being made, and they all have a very collaborative energy, and there is a positive and celebratory vibe around what they are planning.

When will SM reveal their intentions regarding Seunghan?

The Moon + 8 of Wands + Queen of Wands (Clarification)

These were very contradictory and I was very very confused at first. The Moon would indicate "IDK would they even ever though?" and the 8 of Wands would indicate "very soon" LMAO. So then I was like hollon....what if they do not announce it? We have already spoken about this theory, but I have never necessarily pulled that theory so explicitly before. So I used a clarifyer (Queen of Wands) to ask if Seunghan would come back suddenly and unannounced. This would indicate that yes, and that SM is likely being very careful about what they are doing and trying to protect Seunghan from the situation that happened last time. So they will probably not give any heads up or if they do, it will simply not be far ahead of D-Day.

However I also want to acknowledge that I said something like 2 last time, and i also said i did not feel like it would be 2 weeks. But i change my mind. I think it could be two weeks before we SEE something in the flesh. But i think we may still HEAR whispers starting tmw into the weekend and next week.

Final Notes:

I want to remind you all that again- these need to be taken with a grain of salt and that the future is STILL up for grabs. I hope no one becomes complacent and overly reliant on Tarot. While we can see a path here, we cannot guarantee* it and that is important. I am here to show you the path so we do NOT lose hope, not to play God. Please remember that and still do everything you can for Seunghan until he comes back. Again- he isn't back until we see him on that stage. It isn't over until we see him on that mf stage. Okay?!

[smth-intheway]

I haven't seen anyone talk about it, or maybe someone noticed but didn't said anything...

Neil and Charlie are connected, not only by the bonds of friendship but also by their shared symbolism of “death”, which is shown at the very end of the movie/book when their seats were empty. They are both key characters and as those who, despite their differences, are very similar.

Let's start with Neil. We all know that Neil is the one who started the dead poets society in 1959, he is the speaker and the leader of the group, as if leading the boys. He is the first to find the album with Keating's photo in it, the first to learn what the society is (yeah boys were near him), the first to read the official opening speech and assign roles to everyone. Who will read and who won’t. He acts as a confident person, his actions are based on a new feeling and finding freedom from the grip of his father. Everyone noticed how he looked at Keating when he gave his famous speech that every person in this fandom knows?

Yes, you can't help but notice how his eyes shine with hope, that he like a prisoner, will free himself from the shackles and escape from the clutches of his father. By the way, about his dad.

This man plays a very important role in Neil's life, as he does in his, albeit in the most disgusting way. His father sees himself in him only in his youth, he wants to achieve what he could not in the past. He uses Neil to turn back the time and become an ideal version of himself without caring what Neil thinks. Most likely, Mr. Perry was an unsuccessful person and perhaps he did not succeed in many things, proving this with the following phrases: "I sacrificed so much for you to be here" and "you have opportunities that I don’t had” He kind of puts pressure on Neil shoulders to give him false motivation to do things as he said, setting himself as an example, like... if you don’t do as I say, then the worst will happen to you, because I know better than you and I have lived longer than you. His father makes his son a submissive and obedient boy who is obliged to do and act as he is told, simply because he has no choice, because he is inexperienced and "impressionable" in the opinion of his father and he must definitely listen to the one who knows better in order to avoid the worst outcome. Just lower your head and show obedience like everyone else.

By the way, it is interesting that in the book the first description of Neil, and the first words about his appearance sound like this: "The breast pocket of his Welton blazer was covered with a huge cluster of achievement pins." (page 5, ch.1) Ironic, right? Now try to close your eyes and imagine the same student, without imagining Neil. What impression will you have of him? Right.. smart, successful with a brilliant future. This is what people who don’t know Neil see. He has become someone who is held up as an example. A diligent student and an example of behavior. Even the fact that in the book he wears a pillar with the inscription "excellence" as if hanging a label of idealism and perfection on himself. That is why they gave him this sign, so that he would carry it, introducing himself as the personification of that very perfection that teachers want to have in their students. But is that what he needs? Neil did not know what he wanted, he did not allow himself to go beyond what was permitted, always silently and following the rules. Afraid of getting burned like a moth over a fire. He was suppressed by his father, all the time his desires and dreams were rejected and not accepted, because there is a coordinate system and you cannot move against it. I can even assume that his father pressured him if his academic results did not satisfy him, from which Neil tried to prove that he could do better, because he wants his father to be proud of him and love him for being a good son, perhaps Mr. Perry could punish Neil for disobedience, from which the boy began to fear his father like a nightmare. Remember the scene when his father entered the room at the very beginning of the movie after the ceremony? Neil's behavior changed from before to after. With his friends he was happy, self-confident and the life of the party, but when his father showed up on the doorstep all of these traits were washed away and Neil showed his fear and insecurity.

So he hid himself, his dreams, ambitions and desires including emotions in front of his father. Several times in the book, (the movie didn’t showed it) Neil had the outbursts and slightly hysterical release of his emotions he was holding when his father was around. “Neil held the achievement pin in his hand as he spoke. “The bastard!” he shouted suddenly, jabbing his thumb with the metal point of the pin and drawing blood. Todd winced, but Neil just stared at the blood intently. He pulled the pin out and hurled it against the wall.” (Page 19, Chap3)

“Mr. Perry turned and stalked out. Neil stood still for a long time, then, walking to his desk, he started pounding on it, harder and harder until his fists went numb and tears began rolling down his cheeks.” (Page 119, chap11) Neil isn’t an emotionally stable person because his emotions only show when his father is not around. He is mentally weak because he is afraid to speak his mind around someone who will not listen to him. This is important and worth remembering because Neil has no voice around his father, so he did not tell him what he wanted, so he kept silent because he understood and built a mental reflex that his father's stubborn nature would still make him do what Neil does not want. He already knows what his father will say. Rejection. This is his weak point. He is afraid of rejection and does not want to hear it again, because he has heard it so many times ... over and over again. This Neil is very different from the confident guy he shows himself to be in society.

he did not share his feelings/thoughts with anyone, because he most likely not had close friends except Charlie. Because His entire life was planned and controlled by his authoritarian father, from A to Z. His dad would’ve probably not be happy about his son being friends with the “who the hell knows”.

That's why when he heard Keating's words about enjoying the moment, living here and now while this moment is here because one day it won't be. Carpe diem my friend. You need to look at things in the different way and not be afraid of what others think because what matters is what you think. These words entered Neil's thoughts as a basis for changing his situation, to free himself from the shackles and become who he always wanted. Because if not, this moment will never come. He began to think differently and began to go towards his dream that he wanted to acquire so much. Neil was slowly drowning in his ideal world, living freely and hopelessly, but he misunderstood Keating's words, because he had to change his idea of ​​the world and not himself. Neil did not understand that you cannot change the situation you are in, you can only change your idea and vision of it. He wanted to take control, but he forgot that sucking out the bone marrow, you need to do it so as not to choke on the bone. It is interesting that he was the first to come and recreate the Dead poets society and the first to leave, thus killing this society.

His death has a huge influence on the plot as well as on the symbolism itself, because if you look closely, in the book he dies with his crown of flowers as if killing his personality "Puck" through which he embodied the archetype of the deceiver (his father’s deceiver), challenging the established standards of behaviour. The second one is a reference to Jesus that many talk about. So, if you think about it, the crown of branches that he wore is very similar to the one that Jesus had. At first, he looks up, supposedly into the sky, in search of the meaning of life and pondering his decision. He puts on the crown, proclaiming himself his own liberator, just as Jesus was in Christian culture.

He didn't want to depend on his father or the rotten system anymore, Neil thought he would make his own decision outside of his father's wishes. After all, if there is no freedom in life itself, then why should he live?

Then, he lowers his head as if accepting his fate and knowing that he has chosen the right path for himself.

Neil showed obedience to himself and not to someone else which made him one step freer before he got freedom completely. He, like Jesus, accepted himself as a sacrifice in the face of freedom intending to be free even if not for others then for himself. Therefore, it was his own "crucifixion".

It is interesting that he lowers his head just like the boy from that very wall painting.

Okay, but then how does he relate to Charlie? It's simple, Charlie isn't always himself either, and unlike Neil's hidden symbolism, he directly proclaims himself to be another person, namely "Nuwanda". He abandons his boring, past self by forgetting who he was through self-destruction. "I have an announcement. In keeping with the spirit of passionate experimentation of the Dead Poets, I'm giving up the name Charles Dalton. From now on, call me 'Nuwanda.'" (page 89, chap9) In the same way, he added more nuances to his personality, such as his famous phrase "getting red" and when he painted the Indian symbol of virility on his torso supposedly giving himself confidence through the symbol's underlying meaning, which is anchored in the Indian goddess Shiva-Lingam which signifies masculinity, virility and association with fertility due to its sexual significance.

The same goes for the symbols he drew on his cheek, what's interesting is that in the movie he drew it with lipstick using red again, which usually symbolizes power, passion and life, this colour is used to attract attention. But in the book... he literally scrapes dirt off the wall to draw this symbol on his cheek. (What a cheerful boy fr)

Charlie is a time bomb. He constantly has ideas in his head, at first it may seem empty but there really is a lot of things, plus this “dish” is also seasoned with the guy's self-confidence and huge ego. This is proven by the fact that Charlie literally claimed the cave when he entered it and then used it to bring girls, without worrying about the opinions of others. He kind of stands as an example of the opposite of the Welton school value system, and encourages boys not to be afraid to be more confident. In the film, he was the first to support Neil in the idea of ​​creating a club, standing on his side, and also defending him after Cameron's betrayal at the very end, knowing that he is risking his education in Welton, but he is not afraid to take on such responsibility ... well, because why should he be afraid? He already has a future full of money, knowing that his father will force him to work with his business. By the way, about his father.

Unlike Neil, his relationship with his father is controversial and he can fight back with the confidence that he will be forgiven. In the film, his parents are shown in the background.

And in the book we only know his mother. I can assume that Charlie is a child from a rich family who lives as an accessory in the hands of his parents. He, like Neil, is the "pride" of his parents and should be an example, only Charlie does not want to follow the coordinate system and enter it instead he moves against it. Like Neil at the end of his path.

We know that Rebellion is already embedded in any ideology at the time of its creation, and rebels only personify rebellion and do not bring it to the established system of values. After all, there will always be those who are against the established system, moving in the opposite direction and trying to find other conclusions, other ideas that will definitely suit a certain type.

Charlie could become a rebel for two reasons, the first: the search for attention. Unlike the hyper-care of Neil's father over his son, his father could be so bogged down in work that he forgot about his own son, perhaps not even his beloved, because then the marriage would be of convenience. His parents did not give him enough attention, pushing him away, rejecting him. He wanted to be noticed by them so that they would give him love, so he tried to achieve it in every possible way and it became a habit. Or the second option: He was tired of living a pretense. Straightforwardness is always a way out when it’s difficult to explain. Just be simple and do not bother to be complex, so the fear of making a mistake disappears. So Charlie did, because as far back as he could remember, he hated being told how he should behave, how he should talk to guests, how he should smile, how he should take utensils for food, and so on. Charlie was tired of seeing people from high society smiling at each other with such hypocrisy, as if a second ago they had not been in deep judgmental discussion. The world of big business disgusted Charlie, because those people were too worried about how they looked in front of others and they ran after status. Charlie was a prisoner of this every day and he didn't want to be like the others, he wanted to create something of his own in his personality, something that the others didn't have and something that would distinguish them from him, or him from them. So he chose the easy way - rebellion. So Keating's words meant something to him in the sense that he would enjoy the moment of rebelling against the school's rules and building his own system. Charlie could relate to his own approaching "death" if life at Welton was not symbolic but real. That is, his expulsion is an actual death. It could be similar to the phrase that Carpe diem oppose - Memento Mori. Carpe diem, in simple terms, says that death is inevitable, but it is unknown when it will come, and therefore it should not be feared, but instead enjoy the moment, which is what Keating taught his students, but there is also memento mori, which says that death is inevitable, but the moment of its onset can be delayed by behaving, so to speak, you should live “correctly” and act rationally for the benefit of your own life. In other words, memento mori means that everything is in your hands and when you die is determined by how you live. And Carpe diem is about the opposite, that nothing depends on you. And therefore you can and should take everything from life here and now. These two terms are closely related to the understanding of Keating's lessons, so each DPS boy had his own end. Tragic or partly happy. Knox and Todd understood that you can't change this system, but you can change your attitude towards it by finding beauty in things and avoiding death, but Neil and Charlie didn't understand him, wanting to change system and putting their lives on the line, so both of their seats are empty at the end.

If you think about it... Charlie is Neil's desire for suicide. After all, he too is moving towards self-destruction by excluding himself from the system directly through death, while Charlie does it indirectly by going through exclusion.

[hail-brod]

The Days To Remember [1/2]

Jack Sparrow x FReader

MASTERLIST || Part 2

Summary: What if Will had survived Davy Jone’s attack? And in return, the captain of the Black Pearl got what he wanted—to sail the seas for eternity. But as much as he desired the thrill of that curse, he was torn between a longing sentiment and his greed for exploration. It was either that or honor his chances. Well, he is a mad pirate. Why not settle for both?

WC: 3.1k

Warning/s: Mentions of gore, battle, and consummation, light cursing, light angst, suggestive themes, kissing, madman Jack, sexual tension, smut (next part).

The battle with Cutler Beckett has met its end. The Black Pearl still stands as your fellow crewmates rejoiced with each other’s cry, voices rumbling out of their chests. Even in your previous state of panic over Jack’s actions to carve his heart out, and ramming it shut into the good ol’ dead man’s chest, your lungs cried out in victory. It was a battle that no man could have ever imagined to happen right before their eyes.

Well, at least maybe just in your case. But you’re damn well sure your mates had the same thought.

This is history.

And as much as you wanted to cling in this moment’s joyous reverie, a single look at the other ship floating right next to yours reminded you of what else your party had gained.

The Flying Dutchman carried itself with a new light, and at the helm stood its new captain, all with his sloppily grandeur demeanor and a wildly pleasant grin. He looked satisfied, and you can’t blame him. This is what he had his eyes on the moment he learned what the ship had to offer; immortality with his beloved sea.

You’re glad that he’s alive and will be around for a very long time and that he got what he desired. That he’s there standing in the presence of his new crewmates who will definitely treat him as a revered captain, heeding his command for it is he who sails it. But as he crossed the deck and towards the plank to bid his farewells on the trusty Black Pearl, his long time darling ship, as well as his loyal crew, you start to feel how much it pained you to see him go as your earlier mirth wisped away into shards of yearning.

You already knew what he planned to do. You were made aware so. And yet, why does it seem like you aren’t prepared yet for this outcome?

There was a falter in your emotions. You have half the mind to not let your bitter smile turn upside down. This is not how you wanted your dear captain to see you one last time.

“No point in hiding it, can ya?” a murmured-like voice speaks next to you. The one-eyed pirate, Ragetti, looks upfront at the sight you were looking at, and points a finger at Jack who’s making the most of his banter with Mr. Gibbs. “If you don’t say it now, ‘tis but a moment you’ll look back on with only regret to accompany it. Well, personally I think you’d regret it more if you’re looking to be with the captain. The Dutchman ain’t worth o’ it all, I tell ya.”

Next to him, his bald-headed companion added. “What the bloody hell do you know? We could take on the ocean and be immortal beings. I’m sure the captain wouldn’t mind us boardin’ in.”

“Go on then! See how it feels to be alive for centuries. It’s just more work ferrying souls—endlessly,” the man bites back with a wisdom you never thought he’d have.

The two bickered on, but you went back to Ragetti’s words. No point in hiding it, can ya? Exactly. At this very moment, you and him are now on a very different footing, on vastly separate worlds. Even if you meet each other at sea whilst he carries on his duty as captain of the Flying Dutchman, it’d be but a fleeting memory that will only tear you away from him before you could even touch the man. So it’s now or never.

It’s either you pursue him or not at all. You have to do it. With only regret to accompany it.

But a line has been drawn, so what in the hells could change once you did so? Wouldn’t that leave you with a broken heart that could easily shatter more into bits?

Jack got what he wanted. What else could he want from you? The helpless woman he saved once from the ocean’s wrath. The torn woman who became a part of his crew even when she had a family waiting for her at shore. The awed crewmate who was only grateful to be a part of his adventure. The teary eyed crewmate who tended to his fatal wound, thinking he would die at her hands.

The appalled crewmate who questioned his choices for choosing her over a hill of wealth—which was very unlike him.

And those were just that. A bond that you will never forget, much less something that you’ll regret. This is what he clearly chose, and you don’t plan to disrupt it. Just like you thought earlier; he’s satisfied.

Yet you see him almost drop his smile from across the deck, a passing gloom that felt so wrong to see on him. It worried you. Nevertheless, his loose smile still hung on as he ran his eyes around the crew, before landing it on you. There was only one thing you could give him, a lopsided smile that you know he’d always return. But this time, it didn’t reach the creases of your eyes and for a moment there, Jack’s expression was that of a relieved one. As if being able to navigate your presence amongst all of the other people onboard was a shining starlight in a vast dark sky. Though, it wasn’t long before he was back at his countenance of flaccidity, elbows at his sides as he sauntered over to you.

“And my darling partner in crime. How could I forget about you?” he teased.

“I’m honestly thinking you did,” you quipped. You then gestured to the docked ship beside the Black Pearl. “With that marvelous thing waiting for you? I’d be over the moon. Well…it could use a bit of color if you ask me.”

“Oh, I don’t know about that,” he replied, eyes seemingly not leaving you. There was something about his gaze that felt intense, and you couldn’t help but meet it, engraving those gleaming dark brown irises into your memory.

As if he was examining you the same, a slight tilt of his head made you aware of the seconds passing by.

“The sea is yours to sail, captain. There’s a lot waiting for you out there,” you said. Your tongue felt bitter.

“Well, yes.” He nodded nonchalantly. “Dead souls precisely.”

“And an endless round of treasures I suppose,” you added as you smiled. And he returned it all the same as the corners of his mouth stretched up into a genuine grin, his golden tooth peeking through. The way he looked at you—it was heartfelt. Not the usual mischief he'd wear. Not a prickle of anything unserious. But it didn't last long as his grin slowly dropped to a melancholic one, his eyes never leaving your own.

Some swell of pride resided in you, seeing that this separation also bothered him. But you won’t assume the extent of such sentiments. You were a team, and that’s where it lies just as it ends.

“Yes…” he hesitantly says. “I believe so.”

For a second there, the world stopped. It was only him that you could see. And in the process, something cracked within you, but you held yourself up with a tilted and pathetic attempt at an amicable smile.

It was time.

“Fair winds, captain," you bade.

His eyes fell from yours, taking him a moment to respond. “Farewell, love.”

And the next thing you saw was his back turned as he strutted far out of your reach.

This was it. This is your choice, and his. No matter how much it hurts, you know that he cherished you as a crewmate just as much as you cherished him as your captain—the savior who made you see light again into this world.

Jack Sparrow was your beginning, and now it’s time to venture forth where that will take you. You owe it all to him.

But, as the said pirate headed towards the plank ‘proudly’, then catching a glimpse of both Elizabeth and Will, that demeanor of his quickly changed with a tilt of his head, annoyance settling through himself like the many times he had to change his course of action. He was one step up the plank when he stopped, seemingly contemplating on the choices he just made.

You had no clue what irked him so. And as you wondered, he turned to you.

What? 

The next thing you know he was already striding towards your way, and soon smashed his lips into yours.

At first you didn’t know how to react, but by then it was instinct to shut your eyes close as you felt him deepen the kiss with his hand cradling your head from behind. There was no room for rejection, so you melted into it as his other arm banished all distance between your bodies. He held you closer like nothing before. As if this particular split bothered him just as much as you did.

Out of all the women he wouldn’t be seeing for a long time, it’s you he chose to cherish. And you dreadfully feel lucky right now.

Somehow, the kiss felt like flying as you feel yourself slightly tilt back with his support, his lips a passionate maneuver. Not even his beard could hinder anything as it only served a far more thrilling sensation.

Who would’ve thought your dear captain felt the same?

For that single moment, the pirates around you didn’t matter. Although, you didn’t miss the comment given by one of them, pride dripping in their tone. “Aye, the captain must’ve heard me advice.”

Honestly, you’re fortuitously thankful if Jack actually did hear. And even if not, you’re not really complaining. Perhaps you should start listening to Ragetti’s words of wisdom more from now on—if you ever see each other again, that is.

But you didn't dwell on that further; you’re far too busy at the moment. 

When he slowly pulled back, the hand behind your head trickled down to your neck as you met his blazing dark brown ones, and you simply couldn't tear yourself away from them. Your poor heart rammed in your chest wildly.

Gods, your thoughts ran. Mum never forbade me to fall in love with a pirate, didn’t she?

And as if he could read your thoughts, that charming smirk of his surfaced.

Which is actually a sign that he's about to do something mad.

You frown. "Jack, what—"

Before you could complete the question, the pirate beat you to it as he diverted his attention right past you, his voice booming across the ship. "Hector!"

"Oh, mercy," the said man sounded displeased as he replied, seemingly knowing what Jack had in mind. "No."

From a second's moment of confusion, you eventually realized what Jack was trying to ask the feathered hat pirate. And if your memory serves you right, this almost feels like the one you’ve witnessed during the battle in the maelstrom. With the look Jack chanced at the two newly wedded couple earlier, you started to register where this was leading.

And you can’t believe it yourself. He is Captain Jack Sparrow for a reason, and he's as mad as ever.

The said man simply stretched out an accommodating smile at Barbossa, and with his arms still holding you close, you tried to look behind you only to see that the latter was staring down his nose at your captain.

“Come on, mate. Do it for an old friend, will ya?” pleaded Jack.

You immediately turned back to Jack. “Please confirm it to me that you’re asking him what I think you’re asking him.”

Jack averts his attention back on yours, his smile turning soft. “I think it’s perfectly obvious now, love.” His hands held you closer from behind just like before, thrill stirring in his dark-pooled irises. Though, it quickly changed as his brows folded. “Unless you don’t fancy the idea.”

You almost wanted to laugh at that, but you refrained. “With me? Now?”

“Aye.” He courtly nodded, as if he was telling you the obvious. “And I doubt your village would want you to join the Dutchman’s crew, so there’s no other day, is there?”

You chuckled at that. “Yes. Yes, I suppose they wouldn’t.”

There’s a part in you that’s begging to digress—that this is your choice. But you also know that they are waiting for you; the rapport of kinship to your homeland is what you also held dear. Besides, piracy was not your first option into livelihood. You already had your fill of adventure, even though it was only a matter of debt. To you, the soils of a land and the buzz of a lively village is where you belong.

Yet you stall here, thinking of bounding yourself to someone who’s now forbidden to step on land. Even so, you believe marriage has more to it than just living together.

“Marry me?” Your words came out quite impulsively than you let on.

Jack’s brows deepened a frown as he tried to process your question on whether you were asking him about his point—or that you’re actually asking him to marry you. But it wasn’t long before he eventually caught on, the corners of his lips upturning.

“Yes,” he answered, a compulsion he can’t turn away. “Marry you.”

You hear Barbossa mutter something as all the other heads turn to his annoyed form, who’s now stepping down from the quarter deck. Stance as intimidating as ever, the feathered hat captain sneered at Jack. But when he landed his attention on you, it at least subsided.

If you blink, you could’ve missed the somewhat compassionate expression he almost fully wore.

“Are we doing this or ya lot already regretting it?” he plainly asked, standing a few feet away from you and Jack, looking like he’s already regretting it himself.

“Oh, no,” Jack started. He pulls away from you, but his palm met yours, and bends down to place a kiss on your backhand without breaking an eye on yours. “No regrets here…nor will I ever.”

You should’ve been shrinking in embarrassment by then, knowing that you were surrounded by a crowd of all kinds of pirates, or melting on the wooden floor from the way Jack ravaged you with his gaze. But none of that prevailed in overwhelming you when Barbossa started his officiation of this middle-of-nowhere marriage.

Jack gave you all of his attention, and it was clear that whatever Barbossa was saying didn’t matter to him any more than you were. You hadn’t even realized how quiet everyone was—maybe just out of respect. But you thought wrong when you glimpsed both Ragetti and Pintel leaning at each other in a heartfelt manner as they eyed the occasion. It was sweet of them. Even Elizabeth herself regarded you with a wide smile as she rested her head on her newly wedded husband’s shoulder.

“Just get to it, mate,” Jack called out to Barbossa. “Skip it to the ‘I do’ part?”

You swear your officiant looked like he was one word away from shooting Jack. You couldn’t help but lightly shake your head, smiling. Jack didn’t even spare his first mate a look.

“Jack Sparrow,” Barbossa mentions the name venomously, and soon after, actually heeds Jack’s request.

When he was finally asked the question, he answered it in less than a heartbeat. “I do.”

There was no teasing at play, nor the walls he puts up as a captain. This time, he sounded as serious as he could have ever been. The smile he hung wasn’t the same ol’ frisky one he’d give you when he’s wrought with excitement. It was different, and you know where you'd seen it before.

A time where he decided the fate of something he couldn’t bear to lose.

And at that moment, he took your breath away.

You had not even heard what or how Barbossa asked you the question, nor the words you unleashed from your mouth. But you know it’s what your heart desires.

“I do.”

Your officiant didn’t even have to say anything else when Jack himself leaned in, catching your lips on his.

I could get used to this, you said in your head. For whatever time we’ve got at least. You couldn’t think of anything else, aside from realizing that Jack had such softer lips than you would have thought of.

“Somehow I’m surprised I haven’t gone and tried to kiss you before all this,” he says as soon as he breaks away, his forehead leaning closely to yours as his hat casts shadows over your faces.

“Did I actually leave you wanting, Captain?” you replied, reminiscing the ghost of his lips on yours.

“No captain, no,” he folded a brow. “Darling would be rather appropriate, wouldn’t it? And yes. Should I demonstrate my love for you again? Because I’m willing to take me single day at shore with just you.”

His gaze didn’t waver as he said that. Sure, you could identify the lingering sexual desire in the door of his soul, but there was also vulnerability. If this was anything like the ways of his seduction to other women, it was not. Because he isn’t trying to seduce you—you’re already his.

Though, with the weight of what the future holds, along with the fact that he’s bound with his new cursed ship with ten years worth of service, there is only one day of respite given to him from the harshness of the seas.

And to be with you.

Well, you mildly think he’d view the seas as harsh when for all his life he loved it. But only a day on land is just as harsh. A longing desire even.

And it certainly doesn’t change the fact that this is the last day you’ll ever hold each other again like this. Not for the next year, nor five. But for a decade. And just until that single day comes again, will you two be able to burn your hearts out.

Your hold on him tightened without you noticing. Getting eloped so suddenly without thinking it through first was certainly not on your list for today. It was all about surviving Davy Jone’s Locker and the battle with the pirate lords. But by the time Jack incited his desire of marriage, it was pretty much clear you both wanted no regrets. For even how too mad it was for you, it is a decision that you will look back on with gratitude for yourself.

Whatever may come, you know that you love and will love this madman.

So as you brushed past the flutter his words had given you, shamelessly suggesting the idea of consummation, your toes pushed you up as you tasted his lips once again. “Shall we make it worthwhile for the next ten years then?” you softly muttered to him after.

Recovering from the kiss, he fluttered his eyes open, grinning. “As worthwhile as can ever be, love.”

>> Part 2

A/N: Thank you so much for reading! As what I've typed above, this will have a pt. 2 which I've already written and been moving onwards to finishing it with a wee bit of editing (jk not wee actually). Here's to hoping I'll be able to settle that next week. I'm just excited because it's been fun writing this >.< Especially the next spicy part— Do don't expect too high on my smut prowess. It has been awhile since I wrote one but it isn't for naught. Because even I shocked myself with what I've just written (´。＿。｀) And lastly, if anyone wants to be tagged for the next one, feel free to comment about it or anything!

Ko-fi?

[dr-spectre]

Hey guys! I wanna share something REALLYYYYYY important with you all!!!

So, I was having a nice conversation with an editor from Inkipedia. Really friendly individual, we had a nice civil discussion and it was great to hear out their points and wiki related things. I learnt some cool things and how Nintendo operates in certain areas.

I asked them about some stuff relating to Callie and localisations, and they told me that the "Hypnoshades" are actually just called "sunglasses," in the original Japanese version of Splatoon 2 and theres no mention of brainwashing OR hypnosis. All of the events in the original japanese version of Splatoon 2 seemed to be a lot more vague and up for interpretation which i found to be very interesting!!

However.... the editor told me that the English localisation line from DJ Octavio, "I remixed Callie's brain!" is actually different in the original japanese version.

GUESS WHAT DJ OCTAVIO SAID...

"Aori-Chan is so simple minded! I was able to brainwash her with ease."

Nintendo JP.... WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?!?! I WAS YOUR BIGGEST DEFENDER!! WHAT IS THIS?!?!?! YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THAT IN THE ORIGINAL JAPANESE VERSION... CALLIE WAS STILL BRAINWASHED?!?!

Oh I'm gonna be sick....

You know, this ultimately just proves something to me.

Splatoon 2's writing... just fucking sucks. Straight up, it's ass. And not the good kind. It's poorly written and you wanna know why? It's set up is REALLY GOOD!!!! but it's pay off is the most uninteresting, vile, disrespectful, childish, lazy, DISGUSTING THING THEY COULD HAVE POSSIBLY DONE!!!

All this interesting set up with Callie and having this arc where she's so lonely and busy that she ultimately runs away to the Octarians, joins them willingly and ends up getting hypnotised, resulting in her becoming more emotional and seeping into the darkness in her heart... Marie, having to come and remind her of the good times they had together... to reignite the positivity in Callie's heart... to repair what they have broken... to have a fresh start...

But did this setup get paid off in a satisfying and emotionally deep way? No.... they choose to TREAT CALLIE LIKE A FUCKING MORON AND FOR WHAT REASON?!?!?! ARE NINTENDO JUST SCARED OF DEPTH?!?! WHATS THEIR FUCKING ISSUE?!?!?!

ITS SO DISRESPECTFUL!!! SHE LOST THE FINAL SPLATFEST AND YOU CONTINUE TO BEAT HER DOWN?!?!?! WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?! WHAT WERE THE WRITERS COOKING?!?!?! GET THEM OUT OF THE KITCHEN DAMN IT!!!!

They literally picked the most uninteresting and disgusting fucking outcome possible and I genuinely don't know why. There's SOOOO much concept art and multiple sunken scroll entries that showcase this depth for Callie, AND THEY THREW IT AWAY!!!

But you know what? Im gonna continue to hold my stance about the events of splatoon 2 because I would rather like to look at the story in a more interesting and narratively fulfilling way than what Nintendo is trying to push. Sure, it might not be what Nintendo said happened, but I would rather look at the events in a different, more character rich way for my own fucking sanity and enjoyment. I am going to continue to say fuck you to the notion that "Callie was brainwashed and kidnapped" because I like stories where characters go through character arcs and growth!!!! I hate it when that depth and agency for my favourite character in this franchise IS TAKEN AWAY!!!!

I would rather live in a world where Fresh Start ACTAULLY MAKES SENSE AS A SONG!! I would rather live in a world where OCTAVIO ISNT A FUCKING UNREDEEMABLE EVIL MONSTER THAT CUTTLEFISH WOULD NEVER WANNA SEE AGAIN AFTER HEARING WHAT HE DID TO CALLIE!!!!

I would rather live in a world where Splatoon 3 feels more satisfying to me and the Squid Sisters get proper send offs and pay offs to their arcs from the start of Splatoon 1.

I would rather live in a world where Tidal Rush is more emotional and personal, THAN SOME BULLSHIT "oh we gotta save callie because she's a dumb idiot and she's an object to grab because it's a video game!!! Ha ha!!!"

I would rather live in a world where Callie is given a proper character arc, INSTEAD OF GETTING KIDNAPPED AND THESE AWFUL AND DISGUSTING THINGS DONE TO HER! ONLY FOR IT TO GET REVERSED SO EASILY WITH NO MENTION OF THESE EVENTS EVER AGAIN!!!!!

UGH.... I'm actually so angry. I hate this so much.

When Splatoon 4 comes out, I'm not gonna hold back on my criticisms. I want change out of these writers because the current format we have for Splatoon stories is actual dogshit and I'm so tired of it. Everyone in the community is tired of the cool and interesting character details being pushed to the side and hidden away because Nintendo fucking hates narratives and only saves it for RPGS for some ungodly reason.

Im tired of important character details giving shoved off in optional and hard to find content. I'm tired of these awful implications and events being spread like wildfire in the community because daddy Nintendo said so.

Im done.

[scorpioriesling]

Too Hot To Handle - Episode 1

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *

Characters featured: Reader, Feyre, Morrigan, Gwyn, Elain, Emerie, Amren, Cassian, Lucien, Eris, Tarquin, Rhysand, Helion, & Tamlin

Warning(s): None

SR's Note: Okay, so I know this show was runner up for the most votes on the poll. However! I liked this idea so much that I am writing series for both Too Hot To Handle and Love Island if this one does well. So... please like, comment, reblog, and don't forget to vote! You literally control the outcome of this story -- every vote counts. xo

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *

The summer sun cast a warm glow across the chrystalline water in the bay, the reflections like little silver fractures along the surface. The smell of salt in the air only surges you forward, the clicking of your wedges against the wood of the dock a contrast to the swishing of the boats in the water.

The large, white, pristine yacht comes into view, tied directly at the end of the dock, practically calling your name louder and louder with every step closer you take. You raise a hand to shade the sun from your vision, and can make out a few figures on the deck. Your heart rate picks up, a small smile spreading across your face as another adrenaline wave courses through you again.

This was it -- you'd finally made it to the retreat you'd been so anxious to attend. This could finally be your chance at finding not just another partner for the evening, but a real, true partner for life.

All you had to do was step onto the Love Boat.

"Y/N?" The captain greets you politely as you step up to the ramp leading to the boat's main deck. You meet his eyes, and he extends his hand. You take it, and he shakes as though you're equals, his gaze never leaving your eyes as he nods politely. You smile appreciatively, knowing in that moment, under his direction, you would be in good hands.

"It seems you're the last to board, dear. Please -- step aboard whenever you are ready." He nods once more.

"Thank you!" You say with a little too much enthusiasm. He only smiles politely, his face turning to peer out at the ocean beyond once more. You take a hesitant step onto the path toward the main deck, the soles of your shoes clicking differently on the metal than they did the wood. You continue your stride, up and up and up the path...

When you can see the opening onto the main deck, you halt, ruffling your fingers through your blown-out hair and adjusting the strings of your bikini. If you're really about to walk onto a deck full of males (and females, for that matter) who were all here for the same reason you were, you had to make sure what needed to be covered -- and what needed not to -- was or wasn't... right?

With a satisfied sigh, you took one calming breath before taking the final step past the interior walls of the boat, and heading toward the crowd of other bikinied females and half-naked males before you. You could have sworn your mouth dropped open at the sheer amount of options you had -- and not one of them was a bad one! Everywhere your eyes darted, all you could see was muscle, toned abs, defined legs, and amid the whistles and cheers, a very loud:

"Oooh! Who have we got here?"

✧･ﾟ:

All you can do is laugh nervously as every eye on the boat seems to be on you. You haven't felt self-conscious in ages, but with everyone staring at you like this you feel so... exposed. Nonetheless, you're grateful when a pretty girl walks right up to you and holds out a flute of champagne to you with a smile.

"A glass of champagne for you?" She asks. You graciously take it from her, and your eyes meet her caramel brown ones.

"Thank you, yes, absolutely," you chuckle. "God, I'm so nervous, I feel like everyone's-"

"Drinking you up?" She says, her brow raising. You shrug, chuckling as she looks around at the guys waiting to come over and talk to you. "It's because everyone is. You're the freshest glass of water on this boat, and every guy wants a taste." She winks, and your cheeks heat at her words. She laughs and tosses her hair over her shoulder, the sun shining on the radiant golden locks as though they are made of the metal itself. "My name is Morrigan -- uh, Mor, I mean. Everyone just calls me Mor." She sips her bubbly champagne, and you take note. The bubbly one is Mor -- like the champagne on the boat.

"Well, I'm happy to meet you Mor," you say. "I'm Y/N." She glances over her shoulder, her eyes only briefly meeting yours once more before she leans in close.

"Between you and me," she says lowly. "I have my eyes set on that one over there," she glances toward a very tall, dark-skinned male with short black locks. He is laughing at something the brunette beside him says, his smile adding to the glowing aura around him.

"You should move in now then," you suggest, and Mor shoulder bumps you.

"Heyyy you're just saying what I was already thinking," she smiles. Her aura shines just as brightly as she wades through the crowd, making her way toward the joyous male. It's only a matter of minutes before you're approached once more, this time by a much taller, much more handsome person.

"Well hello there darling," the raven-haired male's deep tone sends a flutter about in your stomach. You smile up at him, your eyes dragging across the sculpted panes of his tanned skin.

"Hello," you politely greet. He smiles coyly, taking your free hand in his.

"And who do I have the pleasure of meeting today?" He drawls. You shyly introduce yourself, and he nods as if your name is quite suitable.

"Y/N," he affirms. He places a featherlight kiss to the top of your hand and you blush, noticing his subtle glance toward your bikini top as he does so. "You're quite beautiful, Y/N," he says.

"And you're quite charming...?" You raise your eyebrows in question.

"Rhysand," he finished. Ahh, Rhysand. "However, "Charming" would do just fine, if it is a Prince you are looking for." He chuckles, a small dimple forming in his cheek. You giggle along with him, and he raises his whiskey glass to you.

"Cheers to finding your Prince Charming, hmm?" He winks, and heads off toward where a few other ladies have congregated near the railing. It isn't long before he says something and they all laugh, surely all fawning over him already.

Rhysand the Charmer. Got it. Boy, whoever goes for that one will have quite a few ladies in waiting to battle it out with to get to him-

The loud blaring of the ship's horn has everyone flinching in suprise, so much so that you almost spill your champagne. You manage to keep it all in your glass, that is until the ship disembarks from the dock, the sudden motion causing you to sway a bit in your wedges and loose your balance.

"Woah-"

Two hands brace your arms, catching you mid-wobble before you could topple over. Your upper back brushes across warm, hard skin and you shudder at the contact, feeling alight with energy and embarassment at your sudden sea legs.

"Are you alright, miss?"

You turn, peering over your shoulder as your helped upright onto your platforms once more. Only a bit of champagne has slipped from your glass, but not enough to warrant a scene. Nonetheless, you can't help but feel ashamed in front of yet another beautiful man before you.

"Oh, I'm alright -- just quite embarassed really. I can't believe... I mean I'm usually not so clum...s...y..." You trail off, your eyes meeting a pair of the most beautiful ones you'd ever seen. The heterochromia was instantly attractive, the deep amber on the left such a contrast to the burnt golden on the right; Gods you couldn't stop staring.

"Well, it seems your slight misstep has maybe affected your ability to talk then?" He jokes, his red hair flowing behind his shoulderblades with the slight breeze off of the ocean. Your cheeks flare, and you chuckle nervously.

"No! No not at all, I... maybe my wit just isn't quite as good as yours?" You arch an eyebrow at him, earning you a delighted laugh in return. You quickly scan him when he tosses his head back -- all the way down to his burnt orange swim trunks-

"Lucien," he says, holding out his hand. You take it, and immediately cringe when you remember the champagne you'd sloshed over it moments ago. He lets out a breathy laugh.

"What is it, now you don't like the way my hand feels either? Moments ago you didn't mind..." He teases. You let go, and playfully shove his shoulder, which earns you another grin.

"Nooo, I just spilled some of my drink when I slipped earlier and I realized it got on you too," you explain.

"Ohhh, I see I see," He says, inspecting his hand palm up. He shrugs.

"Well, now I'll just remember that you've put something sticky all over my fingers," he wiggles his brows, and you gasp.

"Lucien!" You can't help but laugh. He only smiles at you, glancing around before taking a step past you toward the stairs.

"You didn't tell me your name yet, love," he says looking back.

"Y/N," You say. He nods, glancing at his palm once more.

"Got it... Y/N, the pretty girl who got my hand sticky and wet. I'll remember you for sure," he says with a wink.

Add Lucien sticky fingers to the list.

✧･ﾟ: *

Over the next hour or so, you'd walked around the boat, admiring the views of the ocean, exploring what wasn't locked off from retreat attendees, and meeting a few more guests. You hadn't had any other males approach you yet, but you did meet another girl while watching the waves.

"What's brought you to the retreat?" She asked kindly. You smiles softly, thinking about the few males you'd already met today.

"Honestly, I haven't had much luck in relationships in my past," you explained, looking over at the freckled female beside you. Feyre was her name, she'd said. Feyre with freckles.

"Oh, I can understand that. Honestly, I've been through some shit myself." She says, peering out at the vast expanse solemnly.

"I just feel like maybe this is a way to finally meet someone looking for the same thing I am, you know?" You continue. She nods, her long golden braid swaying behind her and ending just above the waistband of her midnight blue bikini.

"Oh, absolutely." She agrees, her eyes meeting yours. "Let's just hope these guys we're forced to share this yacht with for a month aren't total dogs, hm?" Her crystalline blue eyes crinkle at the sides as she cracks a smile, and you chuckle in agreement. Just a few moments later, Mor approaches once more from across the deck, her ruby red bikini unmissible from a mile away.

"Ladies!" She exclaims. You and Feyre both turn, taking her in fully as she approaches happily with two margaritas in her hands.

"I see you've found the bar?" Feyre muses. Mor hands her a margarita, and then thrusts one into your hands.

"Oh I've found something better than the bar girls -- I found the hot tub!" She squeals in delight, hopping from foot to foot and somehow maintaining her balance in her very high heels. You and Feyre exchange a glance, but ultimately shrug as Mor links arms with you and pulls you toward the main stairs to the top deck.

"...Oh! And after I talked to Helion, there was this other guy Eris who was like, mega hot but I don't really know if he's my type? Oh, and I almost forgot about Gwyn too, she is such a sweetheart, oh gosh..." Mor keeps rambling on as you and Feyre follow her to the hot tub, your eyes trained on yet two more delicious males already seated inside, engaged in conversation. You and Feyre quietly remove your shoes, and as you bend over to undo the straps, you can feel the blonde one staring directly at you, as though peering right through the thin fabric of your bikini. When you stand again, Mor has already gotten in, the bubbles swirling around her and Feyre's ankles as she wades in as well, banalcing her margarita in her hand. You nervously step in, the slipery stair below only providing deja vu from your earlier embarassment.

"I can hold that, if you'd like," the very muscular, tan, tattoed male with the short brown hair offers a kind smile and a hand to you. You smile back, and hand him your drink.

"Aww, how sweet of you!" You chirp. His smile only grows as you slowly sink deeper into the water, the bubbles foaming just below the strings of your bikini top. You sit next to him, getting a better look at him. He hands you back your drink, and his perfect teeth grin down at you before he says;

"I meant your hand, but I'll help however I can I suppose." You blush, and he only chuckles at you.

"Oh gosh," Mor loudly exclaims. "I forgot! These are my new friends too." She hiccups, clearly intoxicated, and gestures around the hot tub to each individual. You pull your eyes from the handsome male beside you to the blonde, mysterious one across the way who's been staring at you since he'd first seen you. You only meet his piercing emerald eyes for a moment before looking away shyly.

"Feyre... then me, obviously," Mor gestures to herself. "Then we have Y/N, and then Cassian..." Cassian. Hmm... the cutie, you supposed. He glances to you again, a small smirk on his lips as hishand under the water slightly brushes against your thigh. It's enough to cause your breath to hitch.

"...then lastly is Tamlin!" You're immediately pulled from your daze upon hearing the quiet stranger's name. You'd need to be sure to get him alone later, something in his gaze was quite... hungry. It was almost like a need, perhaps one he came to satiate just as you had. It was like you were his prey, he was a hunter out for you in the forest...

Tamlin's target. That'd do.

Conversation buzzed around you as more people joined, left, rejoined, and drank in the hot tub while the sun began to set in the distance. Another kind male, (Tarquin with the Tequila, you'd deemed fit as he kept grabbing you fresh margaritas) a strikingly dark one with white locks offerred to refill your drink -- a few times, actually -- but with each passing hour, you only felt as though you wanted to at least talk to Tamlin. Alone.

"Yeah, there are only half the beds on board, so we have to share," your fuzzy attention clears as you re-engage in the conversation before you. Rhysand furrows his brows, taking in what Cassian had just said. You can't help but do the same.

"Wait, what do you mean half the beds?" Feyre asks. Cassian shrugs, looking around the tub at each person, his eyes drifting over you for only a moment.

"That's what I heard before I got on -- the rules of the Love Boat is that we have to couple up every night to sleep," he explains, then his face contorts in confusion. "Wait, were you guys not told this before you boarded? Or..."

"If it was in the contract, then I probably just skimmed over it," a pretty, fair skinned brunette girl admits. You nod in agreement, you definately didn't read every single word in that thing. But if that's the case...

"Well, if that's the case," Feyre says, rising from the bubbling water and making her way toward the stairs. "I've got some decision making to do then." She says in finality, descending upon them one by one. You sigh, your head fuzzy from the drinks and judgement clouded on what to do. You'd already met so many fine men today, sure, but you hadn't met them all -- but, even so, the sun was setting, and you needed someone to share a bed with tonight.

You rise as well, your hunter tracking your every move. Sure, did you pull your bikini up a little higher for the viewing pleasure? Maybe. Did you sway your hips when getting out of the hot tub? Also... maybe. You knew he was looking, and you quite liked it as such.

As you descended the stairs, you found most of the girls lounging on the beach beds on the main dock, all chatting away. You slipped in, sitting on a corner between Feyre and another gorgeous female with stunning chocolate skin and a long brown fishtail braid.

"Well, I'm planning to bed with Helion," Mor says confidently. She looks to a pale girl with stunning blue eyes that match the ocean's surface, her wispy red hair blowing beautifully behind her. "Gwyn, who are you thinking?"

Gwyn -- the mermaid, with those oceanic eyes -- perks up, her hand rubbing over the skin of her arm. "I haven't really met many males today, so I'm not really sure... Tarquin was nice, but I met Tamlin too and he was very interesting." Her lilting voice is so sweet, you didn't doubt any male in here would find that endearing about her.

"Personally, I'm feeling Rhysand a little bit," Feyre admits. You raise your eyebrows at her, and a few other ladies in the bunch nod in agreement.

"I met him today too -- he was really sweet," the girl with the fishtail nods. Mor giggles at her.

"Emerie, I feel like you've always liked tan guys," she says. Emerie chuckles.

"I mean, I have a type anddd... he fits the bill," she admits. Emerie who likes tans.

You glance to Feyre, who only sits quietly beside you, seeming to be thinking a million things at once in her head before her focus lands on the fair-skinned brunette from earlier.

"Elain? Have anyone in mind?" She asks. Elain's cheeks turn as red as a rose, but she smiles and covers her cheeks with her hands. She reminds you of a flower in a garden.

"I... oh, I just don't know yet, Fey." She admits. The smaller female next to her only shakes her head, her pin-straight short black hair swishing as she does.

"Better figure it out soon... these men will be pouncing like cats soon enough." Her blood red lipstick gleams in the evening sun, and Feyre glances to you again.

"Were you thinking of anyone yet?" She asks quietly. You slowly shake your head.

"No... I mean, yes... I mean, maybe? I don't know, I've only met a few guys, and I don't know... making the first move usually isn't my style." You bite the inside of your cheek. Feyre rests a hand on yours and her blue eyes peer at you.

"Y/N, you don't have to worry... I'm sure you'll have a few males asking for you tonight." She says, a soft smile curving her lips. You only chuckle, giving her hand a light squeeze.

"Oh please -- you're a total catch! Rhysand is yours if you go for him first." You glance quickly at Emerie, who is still listening in on whatever Mor is drawling on about now. Feyre takes a deep breath, and nods in agreement.

"You're right -- I should make my move first." She rises quickly, her sudden motion drawing all eyes to her.

"Okay... ladies uh... nice chat... um..." She stutters. You rise next to her, swinging your arm over her shoulders.

"Let's move in on these silly boys before they mess any of our plans up, shall we?" You declare. A chorus of cheers in agreement ring out as the group disbands, making their way about the yacht as the guys seem to be doing the same.

You take your time, slowly walking the floors and trying to avoid contact with the other males before you're able to at least converse with Tamlin. You ascend the stairs, hoping he'll be in the hot tub still...

Sure enough, he is.

He turns as you walk up to him and you say a silent prayer in thanks that you're the only two up here. His swirling green eyes meet yours, and you sensually make your way into the hot tub once more, the steam a warm greeting against the ever approaching evening air.

"I see you've made your way back." He says, his deep voice sending a thrill down your spine. You sit a few feet from him, leaning against the edge of the tub and gazing into his eyes. His stare that seems to eat you alive.

"I wanted to at least talk before..." you trail off. He raises an eyebrow slightly, and you chew on your bottom lip.

"Before..." he repeats your words.

"Before... we had to... you know-"

"Choose someone to sleep with tonight?" He finishes. You nod silently, and he sighs, his arms dipping below the water's surface. His gaze flickers toward the evening sunset for a moment, and you study his face before his eyes settle back on you once more.

"And you... only came up here... to talk?" He rasps, and you stare wide-eyed as his long fingers gently find purchase on your thigh, running up and down softly. You'd be lying if you said it didn't set your core on fire; your sex drive was already high as-is.

"I... uh, well I mean..." You suck in a sharp breath when his hands find your knees, lightly tugging you closer to him. The water swirls around you, the steam adding to your flushed complexion as he pulls you mere inches from him. He leans in close, practically hovering over you as a small smile spreads across his deliciously kiss-able lips.

"What was that you were saying, Y/N?" He whispers. The way your name rolls off of his tongue is mouth-watering... as though he's the freshest glass of water in the room, and you simply...

Wanted a taste.

You push off the hot tub bench, the water lapping at your waist as you smush your lips onto his. You were right -- they are quite kiss-able. The instant attraction is very apparently two-sided as his hands rest on the esposed skin of your waist, your hands caressing his sharp jawline and lightly threading through his bleach-blonde locks. He parts his lips, allowing you in and you take it, your tongue dancing with his in a tango of passion and instant attraction.

He guides you onto his lap, pulling you to sit atop him and continue to makeout. Every soft groan from him sends wave after wave of arousal to your core, and you couldn't help but feel excited to share a bed later. Oh, the things you had planned...

He pulls back, his half-lidded eyes searching yours as his puffy pink lips curve into a small smile, revealing his (of course) perfect smile.

"This means we're sharing a bed tonight, hm?"

✧･ﾟ: *

When the announcement came over the speakers that the passengers would be disembarking for a luxury dinner, everyone was quite thrilled! You'd found Mor again, who was happy to report that Helion confirmed he'd share her bed for the night (you hadn't yet told her about Tamlin) and a few of the other males you'd met that day fell in line beside you as you filed off the yacht, one by one toward a very expansive, very theatrical scene.

Fire dancers, bongo players, hula skirts all around -- this was a party! Everyone whooped and cheered as the group made their way toward the building, the festivities only creating more excitement as we ventured on.

"Love Boat passengers!" The Captain called from the back of the group. Everyone halted, turning to look to him as he removed his hat and gazed over the crowd.

"I have been asked to inform you that... unfortunately, you will not be re-entering the yacht," he explains. A wave of confused mutterings overtakes the group, but the Captain continues.

"Nevertheless -- you'll ride out the remainder of your retreat in a luxury villa!" The confused murmurs switch to excited chants, suprise overtaking the group.

"Lastly, I will not be in charge of you any longer. You'll be monitored via cameras, and by Lana." He announces, and begins retreating toward the yacht.

Many people call after him, asking who Lana is and looking around for another host among the entertainers on the beach. Instead, a robotic box emerges from the end of the path with a white cone-shaped device atop it, glowing with light as sound eminates from it.

"Greetings guests. I am Lana, and I am your host."

Many people look around, groaning in confusion over your new cone-shaped hostess. Lights flicker on behind the cone, illuminating the vast expanse of the luxury villa the Captain had mentioned earlier. Cue another round of excited whoops and hollers.

"Welcome to my retreat, Too Hot To Handle. The villa behind me is where you'll reside for the next four weeks while you explore the meanings behind forming deeper connections with others, bonding with people on a personal level, and forming connections that go beyond the physical standpoint." The cheering dies down, and many of the entertainers lessen their movements as Lana's spiel draws to a close.

"I hope you're ready for the journey -- because you'll be completing this retreat adhearing to my rules. And my biggest rule is that you'll complete this retreat... without the use of any physical intimacy."

✧･ﾟ: *

[a-sketchy]

persona misogyny is so fucking wild. ignoring literally everything else about the entire rest of the games, every single s.link with a female character is like “entirely for having been born a woman i have had to work twice as hard for a fraction of the benefit. even now, i am stripped of my agency in a position i never wanted in the first place” and/or “i’m put on a pedestal by the people in my life because of my looks. men see me as an object to be conquered, women hate me for ‘stealing’ ‘their’ men. if i’m withdrawn i’m a bitch, if i’m friendly i’m easy. because of this, i’m alone” and/or “because of my personality or hobby or lack of cooking skills, i feel like i’m failing at femininity. if being a woman is something i can fail at, then where does that leave me? i’m scared at the loss of my identity and place in society”

like very consistently they present female characters with complex thoughts towards their place in society as women, femininity as a whole, and facing issues stemming from misogyny, and then the payoff is always “my problems were entirely my own fault. i wasn’t strong enough, i was a coward. but now, i’m gonna work hard to be exactly what society expects me to be (which is what i want to be)! i’m gonna do better at femininity (which is still something tangible i can fail at)! i’m going to try hard at making friends (which was my fault for not doing)! all my problems are solved through personal responsibility (that im totally culpable for), effort (which i previously was not putting in), or you, a man! i am Happy and Satisfied with this outcome, can i be Your woman?”

and like hello? why are we here. what the fuck are we doing. why do we keep doing this every single time. can we not do the constant lukewarm attempts at criticizing misogyny so you can jerk off to your own thoughtfulness, while ultimately reinforcing patriarchal systems and brushing off any deeper misogyny-bred issues as a lack of deference to one’s rightful place in society? like maybe don’t do that? for fucking once? just an idea

[firegirl888101]

Insatiable Madness (7)

|Sagau Yandere Fatui Harbingers x Reader|

It seems you'll have to restock some food soon... But is that really your biggest concern?

Reader is Gender Neutral!

You couldn't get the words you wanted to say out of your mouth. How could you be so blind? So naive? It should have been obvious, the way their voices sounded the exact same, the way their characters acted a little too accurate for a fan...

What the fuck could they possibly want with you? You're not the leader of the country, or a famous figure, or.. or...!

"Stop squirming." Capitano ordered you, letting a brief and satisfying hum leave his lips when feeling you move less.

This is really happening. You thought it couldn't possibly get worse after seeing your family massacred in the restaurant. The clear pain and agony on the corpses faces, their screams being silenced by sharp weapons out of this world.

Perhaps if you never felt the need to play that stupid game you'd have been killed along with them, maybe that would have prevented your now never-ending grief.

Let's calm down, rethink things and gather what I already know. There's no use wishing for a different outcome when I can't change what's already been done. You thought to yourself, taking a deep breath.

These... Fatui Harbingers are after someone called The Decider. They used that... compass thing Dottore supposedly made to locate them, and as it pointed to me, they think I'm the person they're looking for. They killed everyone in the restaurant for some unknown reason and now they're trying to take me back to their world...

Arlecchino said 'The Tsaritsa has been searching for someone who can control what can't be seen for awhile now'... What could that possibly mean? As far as I'm aware, I have no special abilities or anything like that.

"You know, this is the quietest I've seen you since first finding you hiding in the toilets. It was very amusing..." Scaramouche taunted you, knocking your head.

You pretended to continue being stuck in your thoughts, and ignored him.

"Well, apart from when I beat you senseless." He corrected himself with a laugh. "How are those mortal bones you have? I should have hit you harder, that way you wouldn't be able to move..."

What a monster. I can't believe the harbingers were my favourite characters.

"Your taunting will break them if you continue." Signora rolled her eyes.

"Rosalyne is correct. Heartless puppet..." Arlecchino cursed under her breath.

"And your arrogance will lead to your demise, witch." Scaramouche snarled at Signora, turning his head to give a warning glare to both women.

"Enough." Pierro warned the two, seperating them with a push. He looked at you staring at the drama for a moment, then continued walking next to Dottore.

Capitano then placed you gently on the ground, keeping a firm grip on your shoulders to stop you from moving.

"Do not think this is a regular occurence," He sighed to himself, grumbling like an old man. "We're all a little unsettled in this world, we're usually more calm and collected in the presencse of prisoners."

Oh, no, I know very well from the game that this is a regular occurence.

"Stupid gadget..." Dottore cursed to himself, taking a screwdriver and tinkering with it.

"Dottore, you've been tinkering with that compass like a mad man since we first arrived in this world." Sandrone eyed the doctor suspiciously.

"Assuring it'll function correctly is all I'm doing."

"Deary me doctor, I'm beginning to doubt your intentions." Columbina smiled at him whilst using her body to block his path.

"You're mistaken in your intrusive comment."

"Miss Columbina is correct," Pulcinella frowned at his coworker. "It's becoming suspicious how you're delaying our departure of this world.

"Do you really think I want to stay here without my lab? Without my clones? Without my life's work?"

You could feel the tension rising as each harbinger began to question the doctor. You knew they didn't really get along in game... but it was frightening to actually view it in real life.

I'm starting to feel sorry for the fatui underlings who have to pretend they don't hear anything...

As they continued to argue, you began to notice where exactly they had taken you.

The park? It's practically deserted, nothing like how you saw it earlier in your aunt's car. The bird's which once flew for their children hid in their nests, the squirrels hiding in their little burrows for comfort.... It truly was something new.

"Hey comrade! We're talking to you." Childe tapped your forehead.

"You definitely weren't talking to me. You were talking to him." You pointed at Dottore, who's arms were crossed.

Although, now that you're paying attention, somethings noticeably wrong. The Harbingers all don't look as confident as they once did, they were all looking at you, some had hopeful expressions whilst some glared at you.

"We definitely were." Sandrone scoffed.

Next to Dottore's feet was a crushed compass... wait, did he destroy his gadget?? How the hell were they going to leave Teyvat without it?

Hold on, isn't that a good thing? That means they can't take me to Teyvat... but it also doesn't change me being held hostage...

Also what happened to the police? They left as fast as they came!

"Stop leaving us." A harbinger clicked their fingers in front of your face. "The Director asked you a question."

"..." You stared at him in confusion, due to you not hearing the question and being too scared to ask him to repeat.

He simply sighed, and realised the context of your conflicted response. "Do you happen to have a house near this area?"

what.

"Of course..." You replied quietly. You had a feeling you knew where this was going, and it wasn't going somewhere you found favourable.

"Guide us to your home, any tricks will not be tolerated."

Are you kidding me? I'm not taking them to my house!

"Do I have the right to refuse due to privacy?" You asked after pretending to think about it.

"No." All the harbingers replied at the same time.

Great.

... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...

You unlocked the front door of your parent's house with frantic thoughts. Good thing you were gifted an extra set of keys for your 16th birthday a couple years ago...

Fortunately, you hadn't encountered anyone who recognised the harbingers. Unfortunately, however, the police still hadn't found your new location. You thought they would have thought to track your phone by now, but it seems they haven't...

Is there something stopping them? Or maybe, they're trying to think of a plan to save you?

Let's not think about that right now, right now you have unwanted guests in your house.

"I'm setting some rules." You spoke loudly, causing the whispering schoolgirls to hush.

"Who said you could set rules? Have you forgotten you're not in control once more of your situation?"

"That's where your wrong!" You smiled. "This is my house. Which means I am in control here. That's just how it works, sorry!"

"What sort of bullshi--"

"We understand." Pierro nodded. "What rules do you plan to set? As long as they are equal I will not stop you."

"First of all, my bedroom is off limits." You glared. "This is because it's a special place for me, and I don't want it to be ruined by Fatui Harbingers whose manners are that of a barbarian."

Of course, you weren't going to tell them the real reason was because of the embarrassing merchandise and a certain Childe pillow and whale plush on your bed.

"Understandable." Dottore glared at Pantalone, who simply shrugged with a playful smile.

"What? I routinely check your lab for good reasons you know."

"Secondly," You shushed the millionare. "Don't fucking break anything or take apart a piece of technology in this house. Any questions must go to me."

"Who do you take me for?" Sandrone crossed her arms.

"Weren't you the one talking about taking apart the giant machinery in the restaurant earlier?"

She stayed quiet.

"Where's the fun in that Decider? How do you suppose I understand this world if you won't let me investigate?" Dottore whined, picking up the TV remote he found next to him.

"You ask, like a normal person."

"How normal do you think I am?" He argued back pressing buttons on the remote with confusion.

"This can't possibly control a weapon, there's too many buttons..." He muttered to himself.

"That's a remote control for the TV. Well, since you'll probably want the full name: the television." You said, snatching the remote out of Dottore's hands and pressing the power button.

The TV lit up, and showed a woman introducing the news of the previous day.

"Woah! That's so cool!" Childe swooned, walking directly in front of it.

"Don't stand so close!... Oh my god, I sound like my mother." You shuddered at the end.

"What exactly does it do?" Pantalone questioned, slightly smiling whilst taking a seat on the sofa.

"One, I didn't say you could make yourself at home. Two, it displays what you want it to display. It's a type of monitor, meaning it's programmed to be connected to whatever you want it to connect it to."

"I don't follow..."

"Alright," You sighed. "This Television screen displays the programming in this little box." You guided the harbingers.

"This remote control guides the programming to show what you want to see at a point in time. For example, if I didn't want to see this woman talking, I go to the menu where I can see all the channels and choose what I want to see! Or, if you know the specific number for that channel you want to watch, you input it using these buttons."

"Like a performance on a stage!" Columbina giggled, her hands clapping with glee.

"Not exactly, but if that helps you understand I suppose the idea works."

"This is genius." Dottore hummed in delight. "But you're absolutely terrible at explaining. Let me try."

Dottore then scrolled down the list you demonstrated, he squinted his eyes at the words... almost as if he couldn't understand them. He then pressed on a random channel which almost seemed coincidental.

"Oh please don't click on that one, I'm squeamish." You sighed, covering your eyes when watching him click on it anyway.

"Dottore get that disgusting surgery off of the... the... thing!"

"The screen." You reminded Sandrone.

"That's right! The screen!"

Finally done! Updates will begin to slow down once again as school holiday's are almost over and stress begins... No need to fear, I won't stop working on this.

Little unrelated note: I HATE THE DESERT. I wanted to finish it before I move to Fontaine but it's taking me forever 😭😭

Please don't expect too many happy, nice and generally fluffy scenes.

This is Yandere, a genre which should never, under any circumstance be considered normal. It's abusive, unhealthy and leads to a lot of victims facing awful conditions which they never should or ever have to endure no matter who they are.

This is fiction that I'm writing, meaning it's all taken light-heartedly IN A FICTIONAL SENSE.

If anyone, by chance, is currently in conditions where a loved-one or yourself has suddenly become distant and/or being hurt when away from eyes please get help. Talk to them, or if it's you, talk to someone you know you can trust.

If you can't talk to anyone, find authorities who can help you. Call 999, as it is in the U.K, or your local emergency service. They will always help you, and will never deny your rights or freedom.

Thanks for reading this, I hope all who's reading knows this information already, but I thought I'd include it since who knows when it comes to where you are in the world and whether your education programs taught critical information like this.

✨Elusive✨ Taglist!:

@valeriele3 @pale-value @pix-stuff @yumi-genshin-writer @yuii-v @itz-luna @annoying-mary @etherisy @khalhaimdad @haikyuusboringassmanager @magica-ren @sweatyexpertdeputyduck @booksandteaplusart @9140 @whatamidoing89 @raesleepyhead @nasidibakar @shikanosn @purpleamethystsblog @chihawari @esthelily @stuffyfrenchflowers @conspicuous-mayonnaise @sielt @katsumikumo @greyhoundwires707 @carminerin @raidendeeznuts123 @angelofdarkness2 @conspicuous-mayonnaise @ginnxy-galaxy @clara-maddenlin

Quick Reminder Here! If you no longer want to be on the taglist that's completely fine; I take no offence whatsoever so please don't hesitate to tell me. ^^

[whenlostinthedarkness]

Afterglow: Chapter 4 - After

Lead Singer!Reader x Lead Guitarist!Ellie Williams

Summary: Confronted with the realization of what you and Ellie have done brings on conversations, unexpected outcomes, and flashbacks from the past.

Warnings: Angst, Infidelity, and super SUPER small amount of sexual content.

WC: 3.9k

A/N: This chapter goes hand in hand with the song 'After' my MUNA. Listen Here. ALSO, I made a playlist for this series that I will be linking below.

✮ Ways that you can help Palestine

✮ taglist: @diddiqueen

✮ Series Masterlist

✮ Playlist

Ellie POV

I could feel my bones shaking underneath my skin like a bird with a broken wing left to fend for itself in the dead of winter. 

The door was mere moments away, yet every move was agonizing as I relished in the feeling of my own stupidity and carelessness.

I always thought I was a selfish person. If things weren’t to my liking, I wasn’t afraid to change it regardless if that meant someone else was dealt a losing hand. I would often boil this down to me simply knowing what I wanted and not being afraid to set boundaries, which, I suppose in a way that’s what I was doing, but that didn’t dismiss the level of egotistical thinking that also came along with it. 

It’s funny. My selfishness got the better of me years ago when I broke the heart of the girl I was now ushering into the hotel suite where our infidelity took place. That very same selfishness was what drew me back to being entangled with her body last night with very little thought to who I was hurting in those moments..all I cared about was what I wanted.

As I closed the heavy door that spoke a moderate screech as it latched to the door frame, she began to sob. I didn’t know what to do.

I rarely cried because I didn’t know how to deal with my own emotions, and here, in front of me, was someone who I fucked everything up with- who was crying because of something that I initiated and something that I promised was going to be okay. I knew they were empty words, yet I wanted it so badly. I wanted her so badly.

I wanted all of it, I wanted the sex, the lack of clothing, the closeness..but specifically, I wanted it to all be with her. 

She was like an addiction that I couldn’t control when it was within reach which is why the distance we both silently agreed upon was working so well, until it wasn’t. Until it was dangled above my head within reach and I had no other choice than to grab it and devour every inch of her.

My mind exited it’s blur as I came into focus of her and the surroundings. On the very bed where I fucked this person, she was now sat down & desperately pulling manual breath after breath through her pursed lips as she tried to calm the tears that were running out of control.

All I could think to do was stand over her with a palm laid flat on her shoulder. It was the only comfort my mind could muster up enough courage to allow my body to display with another person.

Her hand was dampened slightly from her tears, yet I didn’t mind the way she grasped onto my arm that was connecting the both of us together.

“Please Ellie”, She choked out between sniffles and the clearing of mucus out of her throat. What was she pleading for?

“Please what?”

“Please just make it stop.”

The realization was now pelting me as the guilt and the emotions and the shame were building and building and building until I too felt a single drop of water trickle out from my eyelids. Of course, I was quick to wipe it away.

“I want to- I really wish I could.”

That didn’t seem satisfying to her, and hell, I would’ve rolled my eyes as well if someone who was a large factor in a mess like this was saying the obvious.

Still, her grip on my arm got more severe as her tears started coming back down with force and speed. My inability to handle emotions didn’t make me a monster, I promise. I knew when I needed to set my own discomfort down, even if I only did it for a select few.

She was my select few.

It was like a switch flipped as I sat down next to her with each arm wrapped around her sobbing body as she let her emotions drip down the front of my shirt. 

We rocked back and forth as I gave her the time to let out what she was forced to hold in all throughout the morning.

Envy was a word to describe how I felt as my eyes watched her empty out all of her harbored feelings, yet a single tear from my own eye made me feel like a fucking coward. I was pathetic.

“It’s okay,” I cooed against the side of her head as my hand came to cradle the side of her face against my chest- Something that made me feel safe and I hoped it did the same for her as well.

After several minutes, her eyes became dry and her sobs turned into sniffles.

I allowed my hand to relax against the top of my thigh as she blew her nose into a tissue that was in a box nearby. Her cheeks were as red as a mistletoe - I wanted to kiss it and make it all better.

But that’s foolish, right?

That’s incredibly stupid to think about engaging in that sort of intimacy with the very person who I caused fresh harm to and yet…the selfishness ensued. 

“Thank you”, she spoke with puffy eyes that avoided mine as she clasped her hands in the center of her lap.

I nodded in what felt like slow motion as I observed her like some sort of experiment that was teetering on the edge of explosion. Why didn’t I feel like she did? Why wasn’t I the one sobbing? I’m the one who's hurt not one, but two people who are very close to my heart and yet I couldn't feel what a person who did what I did should be feeling. 

All I could feel was remorse due to the pain I was causing to the beautiful daisy in front of me - I was plucking away the petals that she’d clearly worked hard to grow during our time broken up. 

“Sorry I uh..I lost it i guess.” She ended her sentence with a laugh that was so masked, even a stranger would’ve known she was lying through the pain.

“You’re fine. It’s uh-understandable.”

She nodded reassuringly as she slowly moved her body a centimeter away from mine. She didn’t think I'd notice, but she was all that was on my mind. 

She was pulling away from me physically and mentally.

“Sorry for how I was acting earlier-” She interrupted with a slow hand being waved, which made me pause my words.

“You have every right to act that way Ellie. What we did was..” she trailed off, obviously not wanting to say the sin out loud and I couldn’t blame her for it.

However, one thing I wasn’t going to allow her to do was take the blame.

“It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have come on to you like that and put you in that sort of position.”

She shook her head fervently, “I wanted it to. I wanted it just as much as you did…I could’ve pulled back at any time, but I chose not to. This is something we both did Ellie.”

Now it was time for me to shake my head as both of my hands instinctively went to clutch around her still folded ones. “No..no. I won’t let you take the blame for this! I was stupi-”

“We were both stupid El!” Her voice rang out in contrast to how small and weak she looked.

I found myself chewing on my lip as I tried to think of what to say next. What could I possibly say that could make this thing magically disappear or feel like nothing…even though it meant everything.

“How about we just forget about it, alright?”

This clearly wasn't the solution she was looking for.

“Forget about it huh? Just like that?”

“That’s not what I meant and you know it.” I grimaced as I shook my head. A surge of energy brought me up to my feet as I began to aimlessly pace the floor in an attempt to release everything that I was feeling inside. Except none of it worked. None of the pacing or chewing or mental swearing at myself was working and I began to convince myself that this was going to be my new normal.

“Do you think we should tell..”her voice trailed off as our eyes met. I could see the answer all over her face.

“Kat? You think we should tell Kat?!”

She joined me as she rose to her feet while her body visibly shook. “I don’t know! I don’t know what else to do and she deserves to know!”

Our bodies were parallel as we stood in front of the other.

I knew she was right, yet I didn’t want to say a word to Kat. I didn’t even want to think about her. “That’s my decision if I want to tell her or not.”

She groaned as her hands met her hips that were hugged nicely with a medium wash denim. My eyes couldn’t help but travel and remember the lust that my eyes got to take in last night.

“You’re kidding me right?”

I shrugged my heavy shoulders as my hands rubbed themselves together. “She’s my girlfriend.”

Ouch. The word made her flinch as if she had forgotten or was convincing herself of my life being different than it actually was.

I could tell she was furious as she tried to gather the words she wanted to say. “How could you not say anything to her about this?”

The way her mouth enunciated every harsh word- The way her chest moved as her hands spoke alongside her words- I found myself enamored again, just as I had felt last night.

“Because..” I felt the urge getting the best of me and I didn't want to give in. Instead, I allowed my body to move closer to hers; too close for the occasion between two people who’d engaged in immoral things the night before.

This made her eyes move up to mine as she held our gaze with a slightly gaping mouth. Her lips were taunting me.

I continued moving forward until we were almost touching which made her begin to move backwards until eventually her back was against the wall and my palm was moving past her shoulders to rest against the same wall.

Surely she could feel the warmth of my breath and the smell of the green tea coming off of my tongue. That’s how close we were as we watched the other in silence.

I could tell that she wanted to give in just as much as I did; The real question was who would have the guts to do it first?

She gave me a shock as she quickly moved towards me so our lips ran into each other. Without skipping a beat, I latched onto her mouth as her hand grabbed onto my bicep and mine on her waist.

This kiss was strong, yet so slow. Too slow for someone to consider it to be simple quick lust. 

However, I had already convinced myself that I just wanted a good fuck with someone who was familiar and close and she happened to be closer than ever and so fucking familiar. No matter how much I wanted to deny it, I could tell that there was something else there-some other feeling.

Our kisses turned hot as her mouth followed along with me. My tongue was buried deep down her throat as she shamelessly allowed herself to break the barrier of the hem of my shirt and rest her hand on my bare stomach.

Everything felt familiar and close, just like I had wanted, yet there was something missing and I wasn’t sure what. I figured continuing to practically fuck with our clothes on would suffice for now.

My hands were wandering every inch of the clothes that were set on her body as I pulled the fabric around her waist closer...until there was a knock on the door.

Our lips broke apart with loud breathing and all I could bother to care about was the way her lips were turned up in a smile I would allow to shoot me in the head had it held me at gunpoint. 

I smirked at her while my hands went to smooth down my hair and adjust my clothing that her hands had bunched up before opening the door to find the same person I had seen this morning at this very door.

“Sup D?”

Dina's eyes looked worried and they should’ve been.

“Me and Jesse are about to head out and I wanted to check if you guys wanted to go with us.” She spoke slowly as her eyes searched behind me while she, what I assumed, was trying to decipher what was happening.

“Yeah, yeah sure. I think I'm basically packed.” I spoke so casually, yet instantly my mind began figuring out how I could pack up my belongings that I hadn’t touched as quickly as possible.

“Okay”, Dina nodded, now searching my face for any evidence, but i’d never let her see through me that easily.

We both stood there with my hand silently still holding the door open and Dina continuing to look around the room. That is, until the girl behind me gave Dina the clarification that would put her mind at ease. 

I turned around to find her with a hand on the handle of her suitcase as she wore a warm smile. “I can head down now with you guys. Ellie, can meet us.”

My mouth parted as I nodded and licked my lips. “Sounds good.”

“Great!” she said with a voice so damn cheery, it was whiplash from how she had been an hour or so ago at breakfast when we were both acting as if the other didn’t exist and that what we did didn’t exist as well. 

Dina eyed her suspiciously, then glanced back at me as I moved myself to the side to allow her to exit down the hallway with our fellow bandmate.

“Don’t take forever El,” she said with a smirk that felt like an inside joke that was only between me and her. In some way, it was. 

I shook my head and flashed her a smile as I watched the way her ass moved with every step she made. No doubt she was teasing me by the over-exaggerated movements and I was buying into everything she was selling.

After the both of them disappeared down the hall I let the door shut behind me as I took in the silence for the very first time.

I should’ve felt guilty. I shouldn’t feel like a school girl with a little crush that no one knew about besides me and her, but I did.

I didn’t care that I was cheating on my girlfriend and entwining her in this mess and I certainly didn’t entertain the thought of this ending any time soon. Not as long as she was a willing participant.

. . . . . . . . .

The ride to the record store was nothing short of normal. You and Dina sat in the middle two seats & Ellie and Jesse took the very back ones just as usual.

The conversation between Jesse and Ellie was flowing as the noise of whatever video they were amused by played gently in the background. It was as if everything was right and neither of you had done anything wrong.

Usually car rides were your time to chat with Dina, except this time she was silent with her head resting against the frosted glass and her eyes gently closed. It felt odd.

The wave of paranoia was inevitable, but you tried to assure yourself that it was nothing to worry about. Maybe she was something as simple as tired or not wanting to do this signing. That’s what you told yourself in order for your face not to feel warm and your stomach not to feel a drop of dread.

“Are you ready for this?” You said in an attempt to clear the air and your anxieties, which seemed to work in some way.

Dina opened her eyes, “I guess? Not sure what to really expect honestly.”

“I assume it’ll be chill.”

Dina nodded, her hair getting smothered against the window that still held the weight of her dark hair that was laying in its naturally wavy state.

“We’ll see..do you think they’ll let us shop?”

You giggled, “Maybe if we beg.”

There was that smile that you were needing. That expression that Dina normally wore when something was humorous was much more to your liking than that indecipherable other one that was leaving you a mess.

The conversation between you and Dina began to go on as it normally would. The both of you discussing the latest albums you would want to pick up if you did in fact get some time to browse the store you would be signing at along with other current event topics. 

It felt normal. It felt like you could breathe.

Eventually the SUV came to a halt and you and the rest of your bandmates were piling out of the car and onto the sidewalk that was directly in front of the record store.

A long line greeted you with squeals and smiles as the people in single file wrapped around the brick building. Wide eyes looked at you and the rest of the band with an awe that you never got tired of seeing.

With a small welcoming wave, the band started walking their way to the front door which seemed to intensify the reactions of the crowd.

One person held their phone out to try to get a photo with any of the beloved members, another shouted out Ellie's name and how much they loved her..along with some other obscenities that you would be lying if you said you didn’t feel a tinge of jealousy from.

The group finally made it through the threshold of the front door that was unlocked by an employee that was waiting inside the empty record store.

The space was massive, something resemblant of an old warehouse, which it very well could’ve been considering the square footage and the large ceilings.

You looked around the rows and rows of thin cardboard that was contained in a shelf customized to hold the size of the covered records. The smell was comparable to a bookstore; you only wished you could bottle up the scent and turn it into an immortal candle.

Once the initial fixation of the place wore off, your eyes moved to Ellie. She was standing next to you with the biggest, brightest eyes and the most gleeful smile as she took in the space. It was like a kid in a giant toy store.

. . . . 

4 years ago

“God damn it Ellie”, you let out a deep breath as you set the heavy duty box on the ground a little too harshly for Ellie’s liking.

“Careful,” Ellie winced as she walked over to the box and set her hand on top of it as if she were giving it comfort.

You almost busted out laughing, but decided to hold it in as best as you could. However, Ellie instinctively knew you were masking the urge to chuckle at the amount of love she had for her vinyl records. You were always one to playfully taunt and she loved that about you.

With soft eyes, Ellie looked up to find your massive grin, one that she knew too well.

Her arms went around your waist as she lifted you a couple inches off of the ground and spun you 180 degrees. Both of your eyes held one another as the love you felt for this girl was throbbing red and raw and all the insanely wonderful feelings that came with being young and in love for the very first time. 

“Be nice.”

“I didn’t say anything!”

Ellie rolled her eyes, but still kept a friendly disposition. “I know you’re thinking about it.”

You shrugged your shoulders as your hip bumped the side of Ellie’s body. “You’re just cute is all.”

Ellie gazed at you with the same raw love as her arm wrapped around your body from the side as the both of you stood in silence.

The two of you stood in a bare apartment with nothing but a welcome mat set at the main door. People said that you both were moving too fast, that being together for a year was too short of a time to move in with each other, yet you both decided against everyone's opinions and scrutiny. Because you were in love for the very first time and being in love feels like the sting of a tattoo gun. You anticipate the needle punching ink into your skin, yet when you sit in the chair and the needle is buzzing in your ear you feel a sort of hesitation and fear, but at the end of it all you see the art decorating your skin and somehow the pain of it all was worth it. 

That’s how your love with Ellie felt. Regardless of the arguments and petty mumblings of words that both of you would regret, it was always worth it. 

“How about we christen this place.”

Ellie made her way over to sit in front of her beloved record player that sat in the corner on the wooden floor. She began thumbing through the box of her records, but she couldn’t quite find a record that would be fitting to this occasion-that’s when she got a better idea.

“Hey,” Ellie looked at you over her shoulder, “Come pick one.”

You smiled and set the plate back into the box you had began emptying as you exchanged unpacking for entertaining your girlfriend's little ritual.

“What genre are you thinking?”

“Whatever you feel drawn to. I want you to pick babe,” Ellie said as she plugged the turntable into the nearest outlet, meanwhile you couldn’t help but feel honored, not just to pick a record when you knew Ellie had stern music taste, but also because you were getting the opportunity to live with someone you wanted to spend your life with. 

“How about this one?” You pulled the record, that had become a favorite of yours, out of the box and held it up in front of your chest.

Ellie’s mouth turned up into a bright closed lip smile as she nodded. “It’s perfect.”

Soon the music began to flow through yours and Ellie’s new home as you both busied yourself with unpacking various belongings, not that either of you had very much to begin with. 

It felt like a home and that’s what mattered. It’s a shame neither of you knew what would become of your relationship in such a short time.

[absurdthirst]

Kinktober 2023: October 31st

Day 31: Free For All

Mando x F!Reader

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 2.5k

Warnings: Fight Club style sex, anal sex, mlm, voyeurism, exhibitionism, fucking and fighting, face riding, oral sex (female receiving), helmet riding, vaginal sex, unprotected sex

|| Kinktober List || MasterList ||

Click Keep Reading only if you have read the Rating and Warnings and understand the warnings may not be complete to avoid listing spoilers. As AO3 says 'creator chooses not to use warnings'. You also agree that you're the right age to be consuming anything here.

The loud squeal brings your eyes back to the center of the floor, stopping the conversation between you and another armored warrior as you watch Paz Vizsla take his prize. The the ruby red back armor of his opponent bows, the body lurching forward while a cock that you swear is as thick as your wrist sinks into the man to the hilt, the blue heavy- armored warrior pawing at the black flightsuit of the man under him so he can wrap his beefy, leather cladded paw around the smaller man’s cock while he fucks into him ruthlessly. 

The sight is one that is common now, occurring every week after he challenges Dorin Fatuk and wins.“I don’t know why Vizsla just doesn’t enter into a Riduurok with Fatuk.” Magda grumbles underneath her helmet. Scoffing and turning back towards you while dismissing the very public coupling that is occurring as other Mando’s talk and watch. 

You snort indelicately, watching Paz’s frantic thrusts while Dorin moans and writhes under him like he does every week. Giving in and accepting the defeat with a certain frantic relief. You don’t miss the way Dorin starts to rock back against the cock hammering into his ass. It just further proves your theory that maybe the smaller Mandalorian wasn’t fighting as hard as he could when Challenged. “Because then the Armorer wouldn’t let them fight.” You hum knowingly, sending a smirk back to the purple and gold helmet of your friend, watching your reflection in the T of her visor. 

Mandalorians love to fight, you think they goad one another on purpose, to have them pull their blades and clash. It was why the Armorer had decreed that all fighting be done here, in the Pit. 

The Pit was a portion of the covert that is far from the large passageways that house foundlings and younglings. Wanting to keep the noises away from their tender ears and the sights from their young eyes. The Pit’s rules had evolved along the way until it was known as the Fuck Club. 

You had the opportunity to deny a challenge, no one would look down on you if you did. Beyond the usual shit talking that seems to be second nature to Mandalorians when one or more gathers together. You wouldn’t be forced to fight. 

If you did fight, there were two outcomes if defeated. You would have your helmet removed, disgracing you and breaking your Creed, or you would be fucked. Anyway that the winner wants, right in front of the entire crowd that had gathered in the Pits that night. It was public, dirty and often violently satisfying. Nothing was better than fighting and fucking to a Mandalorian. You don’t remember the last time someone actually had their helmet removed. 

“Vizsla’s always been a showoff.” Magda huffs, making you grin at the annoyance in her tone. “Guess we can add exhibitionist to the list of traits.” 

You hum, turning back and watching the scene unfold. Paz pulls Dorin upright, nearly lifting him off his knees as he continues to thrust into him. The other man’s cock dribbling pre-cum and looking like it’s about to explode. You can’t even imagine how it feels to have the fucking hulk of a man batter against a prostate. Although you swear you had seen Paz and Dorin huddled off in a corner of the tunnels before the fights started. Hopefully it was so that Dorin’s poor little hole could be prepped to take that fucking python. 

“Are you going to fight?” You roll your eyes at the question, hearing it every time you decide to come down to the Pits to watch. 

“I wear no armor.” You remind your friend, motioning to your uncovered face and the noticeable lack of beskar that covers your body. You aren’t a Mandalorian, you have not sworn the Creed, although you are allowed to live among them. Their protection and acceptance among their covert in exchange for going out and securing supplies and bartering for necessities so that they can remain relatively hidden. 

“And?” The indelicate snort coming from your friend makes you grin and shake your head. “You could still beat half of them, armor or not.” Just because you did not wear their armor did not mean the Mandalorians had not trained you to fight. You enjoyed the time you spent training. They had wanted you to be able to protect yourself when you went to the surface. 

“Still-” You break off when you hear another cry, watching as Dorin’s cock starts spurting ropes of cum and hearing the roar of the heavy armored warrior behind him as he thrusts deep one last time, obviously cumming himself. The cheering among the covert was loud, raucous as they thump their fists on the plates over their breasts, covering the sounds of the two men as they ride out their pleasure. 

The noise turns into a mixture of conversation, the attention no longer on the men in the center of the ring but on the figure that has moved away from the wall. 

Din Djarin. He rarely comes to the Pit. The shiny, silvery beskar reflects every light in the place. Drawing more than a few visors his way. 

He’s a bounty hunter, often away from the covert. Traveling the galaxy and traveling to places that you can only dream of. The most you see is the rough market in Navarro, going above ground for the covert so they don’t draw more attention to themselves than necessary. Often wishing that he would take you with him, but you know that Din Djarin doesn’t even know you exist. 

His steps are slow, almost a saunter as he walks into the center of the Pit. The almost lazy perusal over the crowd, as if he is searching for his quarry makes a shiver run down your spine. He looks imposing, even among the Mandalorians here. There’s a moment when his helmet stops on you it seems and your heart skips a beat when he lifts his hand and points at you, loudly announcing your name to the spectators. 

You, he challenges you. Your eyes widen and you can feel the hundreds of eyes suddenly on your helmetless face. Making you wish that you had their armor to hide your surprise and embarrassment. To have that shield from the world and make them interpret your silence or the tilt of your head. 

Everyone is waiting for your refusal, you can hear the whispers starting to rise through the crowd. Djarin’s visor is still fixed on your face, body completely still as he silently demands an answer to his challenge. 

Why you? There are others to challenge. Plenty of available women in the covert who would gladly fight or fuck him. Is it some sort of test?

When you stand, the crowd roars, their leather clad hands pounding together in a muted, yet impressive thunder of applause. Making you a little more sure of yourself as you make your way down to the center. 

The rules are simple. No bombs, no blasters, no blood. Anything else is on the table, although you don’t wear hundreds of weapons strapped to your body at all times. Your flight suit is plain. A blaster on your hip, discarded onto a table to be retrieved later, a vibroblade that you have tucked under your sleeve, and a throwing knife in your boot. 

Standing in front of him, you weigh your options. Wondering what kind of strategy to take. There are weapons available. Sticks and practice swords. Something that you imagine the younglings using when they are training, but these weapons never leave this room. 

He’s quick. Moving before you can even blink and making you feel like you are behind the curve as he jumps towards the table to grab one of the weapons. Knocking into his shoulder harshly and groaning at the solid weight of the man. He’s like trying to move a giant wall of beskar. 

The noise of the crows fades as your vision narrows. All you see is Djarin, watching his core, his footwork as you start to pummel each other. You have a longer staff, a spear that you are using to your advantage. Pushing him back and knocking him off balance in a feverish melee attack. 

He’s good, you have to give him that. He’s quick thinking and his skills are impressive. Taking hits equally as well as dodging them and your attack is quick if you do say so yourself. Despite not being a Mandalorian, you helped train the younglings at times. 

‘Crack!’ The sound of your spear snapping over his chest plate makes you hiss, rolling off to the left when he attacks, bringing the sword down where you had once been standing. Giving you time to leap to your feet and sucker punch him right behind the ribs. A weak spot between his chestplate and backplates. He groans and stumbles forward, clutching his side and you use his bend over frame to climb up his back, wrapping your thighs around his helmet and starting to squeeze.

Din is trying to throw you off, but you hang on. Making sure that his helmet was firmly in place but you apply pressure to the cowl wrapped around his neck, effectively using it against him. Making it where he is struggling to draw breath and you both fall down when he collapses. Tapping your thigh and effectively tapping out of the fight and yielding to you. Making you the winner of the skirmish. 

The crowd roars over the victory, and you reach down to grip the edge of his helmet to begin to lift it. He grunts, panting under his helmet and he grabs your hand, squeezing the back of it, although he can’t stop you. If you want to pull his helmet off, it is your right as a victor. 

You don’t. You expose just the lower half of his jaw as your other fingers drag the lower zipper of your flight suit down. Exposing your cunt to his mouth. 

You’re going to ride his mouth. Using him to get you wet enough and then you are going to fuck him. Once again, the roar of the crowd fades as you hold Din Djarin’s helmet and grind your cunt down onto his mouth. 

He licks through your folds, groaning at your taste, or in relief that you did not pull his helmet off. You aren’t quite sure, but all thoughts but pleasure flee your mind when his tongue starts to move. Caressing and flicking over your clit eagerly, and you know that everyone is watching you ride his face, even Magda, from her spot in the stands. 

The edge of his helmet grinds against your clit as your rock your cunt over his face, riding his mouth and his helmet at the same time. Smearing your juices over both.

Quickly working you up with the quick, harsh licks, you reach behind you and squeeze his cock through his own flight suit. He doesn’t wear a codpiece, but he’s as hard as steel when you grip him. Obviously turned on. 

When you pull away, his lower jaw is covered in your juices, the wetness of your arousal glistening through his stubbled hair. He apparently shaves under his helmet, but not everyday. It is sexy to see, because you’ve never really wondered and now all you will think about will be that patchy brown hair. 

The crowd is still cheering, some of them shouting what you should do with Din, others just wanting to see you fuck. Your hands slap his own leather covered ones away to reach down to the zipper yourself. You want to pull his cock out. This is your show, your right as the victor to touch him as you wish. To decide how you are going to fuck him. 

Din groans again when you reach inside and wrap your fingers around him. Like most in the Pit, most Mandalorians in general, he’s not wearing underwear. Letting you pull the thick, uncut cock free and moaning yourself over the sight of it. 

He might not be as big as Paz, but he’s thick. He’s long enough that you know you will feel him in your guts when you sink down on him. Quickly pumping him a few times as you straddle his waist again. 

“I’m going to ride you, Djarin.” You accounce, knowing that the second your mouth opened, every Mando in the place would go dead silent, straining to hear what you are saying. Especially since this is the first time Din’s fought. It’s also the first time you’ve ever accepted. 

“Your victory.” He pants back, yielding to you and it’s strange to see his mouth move since his helmet is still halfway off. It also prevents him from seeing clearly, his head tipping down slightly to get a better look. 

It stretches you, your walls parting at the intrusion of his thick cock when you start to sink down on him. The slow beating of fists on armor starts to echo around the room as you take him. All visors on you as you start to ride Din. 

Your eyes slip closed and you don’t push his hands away when they move up to grip your hips, tossing your head back as you move. Feeling him twitch and pulse inside you. “Mesh’la.” He moans, making you whimper at the term. 

You can’t believe you won, that you are riding him in for all to see. Hands slide up to your breasts, squeezing them as you bounce on his cock and then you gasp when he pulls your zipper down, exposing your tits to grope them. 

The pace turns frantic, harsh. Galloping on your prizes' hard cock as you chase pleasure. Feeling him completely fill you up and press against that spongy spot deep inside you. Every roll of your hips pushes you closer to cumming. 

“Fuck.” You choke out, feeling your pace falter for a moment and you look down at his still exposed lower jaw. Reaching down to stroke a finger down the edge of it. Feeling him pulse and jerk inside you at the contact. 

He squeezes your tits, bucking his hips up hard enough to make you squeal. “More!” You cry, knowing that even if he takes over, it’s still your victory. 

That order is all it takes, Din holds onto your tits as he starts to drive up into you from underneath. Pistoning his hips up at a nearly unhinged pace. Feeling just as desperate as you are as the crowd continues to thunder around you. 

The second you start to cum, your entire world goes white, the wild cries from the crowd nearly unheard as all you can hear is your own blood rushing through your system. Even your own scream sounds muted. 

You don’t even realize Din is cumming as well. That he’s still inside you, lifting you both off the ground as he paints your walls with his cum. All you can feel is the pleasure. The tight squeeze of your cunt around him as your entire body shakes in pleasure. 

Collapsing down onto the hard armor of his chest plate, you pant, trying to catch your breath. Feeling him relax under you as well as you try to come down from the bliss that had blown you into the atmosphere. 

Fuck, you love the Pit.

[torchstelechos]

Hi! I was looking at your blog and I was thinking about my own emotions during the game and...

My memory is not the best, but I remember that during the first conversation with my friends at the end of Act 2, I... Could really sympathize with Siffrin. Understand what drove him to do this

I mean, when all these characters started talking about how they would all go their separate ways, how they would "abandon" Siffrin (and us as a player by proxy), how they would all go home and just... Leave us aside, just asking to "drop by" sometimes?..

I felt like I couldn't let them go so soon.

And I should clarify, at that point I didn't know that Siffrin was the one causing the time loops, but something deep inside me already knew, so I looked at Mirabelle's game sprite and said "no, you're not going to be let go that easily, that's not going to happen" with tears in my eyes, because I hate saying goodbye, and I felt some... Strange resentment that they wanted to leave so soon, from Siffrin, from me

For me, that ending was unacceptable, unsatisfactory, and I was actually glad that the loops continued, even if it meant that Siffrin and I'd failed our "defeat the king, break the loops" mission, because it meant that I would be stuck with these characters for a while longer

And maybe Siffrin was also happy about it on some level, and I was actually on Siffrin's side here

It's just interesting how Siffrin and the player are so deeply connected on some level that you can feel a similar spectrum emotions that made Siffrin create this loop in the first place

It's interesting how the game pushes you to feel like you're in Siffrin's shoes when the characters talk so much about "going home and asking to visit sometimes" which felt like "leaving you behind"

So when the game told you that Siffrin is the reason the loops continue... I understood it. And even supported it

Hahaha... I hope it didn't sound like a crazy person xd

Good mood!

Howdy!! Happy you liked the stuff in my blog, i have a lot of emotions about the game and the character interactions. Which is why!!! I loved the very in depth description of your emotions about the games character stuffs!! I think its fascinating how well the game can connect the player to Siffrin, especially since the game holds no reservations in telling you that "No. You are not Siffrin. Siffrin is part of this world and you are not" which might sound harsh but it actually makes it very satisfying when you as the player can help Siffrin get his wish in the end. We aren't Siffrin, but we are helping them, and sometimes that means getting really emotionally invested in the same goal.

When I first started the ISAT experince, it was strange how much I felt connected to Siffrin because at first it is very much Oh! I did not feel this with SASASA! So,, its strange how much the different circumstances of the two games can change the outcome of the player's feelings. Going further into this, I did start with SASASA and then went into ISAT which informs an experience that I had not anticipated. With Loop, we were not there from the start and we as the player are only helping right at the end which makes it hard to connect to the same degree as Siffrin but we still care very deeply because of what we have seen. Loop is already knee deep into Act 4 mental anguish, we have no lead up, no build up, just that they are there and we have to help them. And then we fail. But we only find out in ISAT that we fail!! So, at first you can brush that aside as, We can do better! We can help them more than we did before! Then we get into ISAT and its,, different. Because now we know Siffrin from the start instead of right at the tail end of their spiral, we know how important everyone is to them, we know that its going to hurt when Siffrin gets to the end and loops back. We already know.

We have these preconceived conceptions of how this is going to go, but at every step we are wrongfooted because the game cares. Siffrin forgets the parties names, but Loop instantly goes to fix this and we the players can relax. We have someone to talk to! Who knows whats important and helps us get more into what Siffrin thinks because now we have a variable! The others stay the same for countless loops but then we see more of them and suddenly we're right there with Siffrin, we didn't know this about them. We couldn't know this about them until now! But then it grows stale, because now we know. We know, because we are learning with Siffrin. Then we have to focus outwards instead of inwards, because we love them all so much! We care about them! ...and then it doesnt work and suddenly we have to figure out why we're stuck. And it hurts because it starts getting obvious WHY its happening and,, we dont want the characters to leave just like that! There isnt any release of emotions! We didn't help Siffrin like we wanted to! We can't help Siffrin! Only the party can, and from the previous loops we know they'll leave us.

We're stuck forever, and thats horrible. Because Siffrin is losing things he can not lose without it becoming SASASA, and we know that. So when Siffrin starts to lose it, it hurts but at the same time its amazing! Something new! Something changed! Maybe this time, we can help Siffrin! Even if Siffrin is wrong, maybe this time. Except the house is changed, the ending is changed, the party has changed, and Siffrin has changed. And suddenly the thought of explaining hurts, because its the end. The real end!! And we have to be the ones to press the dialogue! We have to be the ones to press attack! We have to help guide Siffrin to their ending! And we do! and its amazing! The party is going to stay with Siffrin, even for a while longer! ... We wont get to see it, but thats okay because we're just here to help Siffrin.

And then we go to the favor tree to let Loop know.

And suddenly it becomes clear we failed someone.

But without them, how could we have saved this Siffrin? How could we have led them to where they needed to go? How could we have broken the loops without them?

We failed the Star, but we saved the time traveler who can help the Star in our stead.

I HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS ABOUT HOW THE GAME PROGRESSES AND HOW WE THE PLAYERS ARE PART OF THE ROYAL WE UNTIL WE NO LONGER CAN BE WITH SIFFRIN OR THE PARTY AAAAAAHHHHH.

Anyway thanks for sending this ask it made me go crazy with how I see the player in relations to Siffrin and Loop <3

[leezlelatch]

There seems to be some discourse lately about content, the kind of content, and the community as a whole. Now, the last thing I want to do is stir up anything, but I had some thoughts that I'd like to type out, and I appreciate whomever decides to read it.

The purpose of this band is to make us happy. You've heard it time and time again, as long as we go home at the end of that show feeling just a little better, then TF is satisfied. And it seems like lately that happiness is hard to achieve here, on twitter, or wherever else one is active.

On Headcanon

Were you sitting at work today? Home? And suddenly that thought popped into your head, a little scene playing out about Copia, or Terzo, or Secondo, or Primo. A thought that filled you with excitement, butterflies dancing in your belly, which had you smiling because yes, in the world that makes you happy, that is what they are like. That is what they do. That is what they say. It's an amazing thing and it's good and okay, and you should be excited about it. Because you just added another chapter to the amazing story in your head. And you decide to post about it, but...someone left you an anon. Someone left you a comment. Someone vague posted. And it hurt.

This is happening far too often across tumblr, and it needs to come to a close. I understand that we all have vastly different ideas of who the Papas are and how the Ministry works, but that does not give a single one of you an excuse to say anything untoward or foul to anyone else on this platform. And this isn't talking about any particular group because more often than not, posts like this are used to justify the actions of others. You do not have permission to use this to further your agenda. Be kind. Choose to ignore that fic. Choose to stay off that person's blog. Stop making posts at the expense of others just because you don't like a particular aspect of their world.

I promise you'll still be able to sleep at night.

On F! Reader and x Reader Fic

I have seen many posts since I joined tumblr to write for the Ghost fandom that express a dislike toward reader fics, and in particular f! reader fics. I can't speak for anyone else, but I'd like to just reflect on my own thoughts on the matter, and once again, I appreciate the time taken to read and perhaps understand where I'm coming from, and know that it is a place of care.

I am a woman. When I write fic, I am writing it to satisfy my own little world in my head. So naturally, I am going to make the reader female, because the universal you is not only the friends I share it with or those kind enough to read, but the you is me. Every sweet word whispered, or gentle touch from a Papa is something I wish would happen to me.

I do not have the right to invade someone else's perspective. I do not understand what it is to be a gay man. I do not understand what a trans person experiences every day, and therefore, I do not feel like it is my place to write these perspectives in an x reader fic, or more so than that, in smut. And otherwise, I'm just not comfortable in doing so. I know my experience, and isn't the first step of writing, writing what you know?

I want there to be inclusivity in writing, but that doesn't start with attacking other authors for writing from their own perspective. It doesn't start with making hostile posts about reader fics, because what's the outcome? You just end up with some people very hurt and unwilling to post their stories because they think it's unwanted.

If you feel comfortable exploring these topics, talk to your mutuals. Say hey, what can I do to gain a better understanding of the content that I'm writing? What can I do to ensure that I'm not fetishizing due to my lack of knowledge? Be a community, and help each other out.

On Notes and Reblogs

A note is not the value of your writing. Whether you receive just a few or hundreds, you have impacted someone. Someone loved your story. Someone is thinking about your story all day. Someone was able to make it through because that one thing line you wrote spoke volumes to them.

We put so much of our energy into worrying about notes that the reason we started writing in the first place is lost. It becomes a chore. There are a hundred WIPs sitting in our folders because it becomes so goddamn painful just to work on one.

No one owes you a reblog. No one owes you a like. And even though it's nice, and it's gratifying to see nice comments on something you worked hard on, notes cannot be used as a currency between followers or mutuals. It just becomes a poison. Your entire tumblr experience is going to be marred by the constant worry that you aren't good enough just based on a number.

Learn to appreciate the ones who do read. Allow your story to make you feel good because there it is! That thing you've been thinking about. It's written down. You brought it to life. That is far more valuable than a tumblr note.

If you've reached this point, thank you. Everything you're feeling is good, and okay, and we're gonna get through. Because even now? When it feels like things are more hostile than happy? You still have Ghost. And you still have everything.