#so posting on this blog while i can lol
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“Eh,” Roman says, “She’ll realize one of the prerequisites for being a soapbox lefty is not having a trust fund, and she’ll cool off into a two-faced Corporate Dem, like a good rich kid. Don’t you worry.”
Shiv scoffs. “Where’s your sense of possibility, Rome?”
“Dad ate it when I was, like, five.”
Roman character study, 9k words, rated M
#succession fic#roman roy fic#realized that when i originally shared this on tumblr it was from my main blog which ive just realized has been shadowbanned for a while#so posting on this blog while i can lol#mainly i wanna promote my Latest Drop#ao3 crosspost#m: fic
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Thinking about Elizabeth Woodville as a gothic heroine is making me go insane. She entered the story by overturning existing social structures, provoking both ire and fascination. She married into a dynasty doomed to eat itself alive. She was repeatedly associated with the supernatural, both in terms of love and death. Her life was shaped entirely by uncanny repetitions - two marriages, two widowhoods, two depositions, two flights to sanctuary, two ultimate reclamations, all paralleling and ricocheting off each other. Her plight after 1483 exposed the true rot at the heart of the monarchy - the trappings of royalty pulled away to reveal nothing, a never-ending cycle of betrayal and war, the price of power being the (literal) blood of children. She lived past the end of her family name, she lived past the end of her myth. She ended her life in a deeply anomalous position, half-in and half-out of royal society. She was both a haunting tragedy and the ultimate survivor who was finally free.
#elizabeth woodville#nobody was doing it like her#I wanted to add more things (eg: propaganda casting her as a transgressive figure and a threat to established orders; the way we'll never#truly Know her as she's been constantly rewritten across history) but ofc neither are unique to her or any other historical woman#my post#wars of the roses#don't reblog these tags but - the thing about Elizabeth is that she kept winning and losing at the same time#She rose higher and fell harder (in 1483-85) than anyone else in the late 15th century#From 1461 she was never ever at lasting peace - her widowhood and the crisis of 1469-71 and the actual terrible nightmare of 1483-85 and#Simnel's rebellion against her family and the fact that her birth family kept dying with her#and then she herself died right around the time yet another Pretender was stirring and threatening her children. That's...A Lot.#Imho Elizabeth was THE adaptor of the Wars of the Roses - she repeatedly found herself in highly anomalous and#unprecedented situations and just had to survive and adjust every single time#But that's just...never talked about when it comes to her#There are so many aspects of her life that are potentially fascinating yet completely unexplored in scholarship or media:#Her official appointment in royal councils; her position as the first Englishwoman post the Norman Conquest to be crowned queen#and what that actually MEANT for her; an actual examination of the propaganda against her; how she both foreshadowed and set a precedent#for Henry VIII's english queens; etc#There hasn't even been a proper reassessment of her role in 1483-85 TILL DATE despite it being one of the most wildly contested#periods in medieval England#lol I guess that's what drew me to Elizabeth in the first place - there's a fundamental lack of interest or acknowledgement in what was#actually happening with her and how it may have affected her. There's SO MUCH we can talk about but historians have repeatedly#stuck to the basics - and even then not well#I guess I have more things to write about on this blog then ((assuming I ever ever find the energy)#also to be clear while the Yorkists did 'eat themselves alive' they also Won - the crisis of 1483-85 was an internal conflict within#the dynasty that was not related to the events that ended in 1471 (which resulted in Edward IV's victory)#Henry Tudor was a figurehead for Edwardian Yorkists who specifically raised him as a claimant and were the ones who supported him#specifically as the husband of Elizabeth of York (swearing him as king only after he publicly swore to marry her)#Richard's defeat at Bosworth had *nothing* to do with 'York VS Lancaster' - it was the victory of one Yorkist faction against another#But yes the traditional line of succession was broken by Richard's betrayal and the male dynastic line was ultimately extinguished.
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in which family is complicated
#persona 3#p3#p3mc#femc#my art#makoto yuki#kotone shiomi#<- not my preferred names but. sure i guess#once again disclaimer that this is still mostly a p5 blog. i just wanted to draw smth simple and i had this sketched out lol#and i was tired of the april fools comic being the last thing i posted lmao#therell be more 5 stuff once i figure out which one i want to draw next <3#(theres only so many jokergender comics i can post in a row before i think its probably a little much.heh.)#ok while im here. no more what ifs 'someone once said burn my dread babe' isnt that crazy. do you think theyd be friends#comics
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What do you think would happen if Atom could somehow visit the Atom: The Beginning universe?
different outcomes!
#astro boy#umataro tenma#Hiroshi Ochanomizu#gif#alright this is where the art quality will drop#this is my first post back#i dont feel like drawing anymore these days but i still love ab stuff so i can do this blog at the very least#also to let ppl know im not dead while my other accounts rot lol
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went back and edited this painting as i always knew something was off about it but i couldn't figure out what until recently! here's to improvement over time
amity version here!
(repost)
#the owl house#luz noceda#the owl house fanart#lumity#artists on tumblr#toh fanart#procreate#stormarts#my art#apologies to anyone who already saw this#im reposting all the stuff i posted while my blog was blacklisted#so hopefully people can actually find it this time lol
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werewolf steve, werebat eddie (ch2)
🦇🧥🦇
Eddie’s knee bounces in the stationary van parked outside the Harrington house; he stares down at the open Dungeons and Dragons Monster Manual clutched between his arms, flipping between the werewolf and the dire wolf. A drawing of the former has it standing upright, muscled and snarling with outstretched claws; his eyes are drawn to chaotic evil.
He knows that Steve isn’t evil. He does. The man who had spent hours next to Eddie at his hospital bedside showed an honour and trustworthiness that had drawn Eddie in even before he’d recognised it.
No, the caring guy he’s come to know is about as far from an alignment that lacks compassion and kills for sport as someone could get. That Steve is capable of wielding a nail-bat against the monsters of the Upside Down only lends an appealingly chaotic feel to the man Eddie had begun to think of as a rogue knight.
Sighing, he flips to the other page held open by his spare hand: dire wolf. Unaligned and a beast advantaged by its pack, this seems like Steve’s speed. Resembling his transformed self more acutely with its simple, albeit large wolf appearance. His finger stops on the bloodied maw, but the idea of it is still terrifying.
Reluctantly, he turns to the page he’s now memorised by heart. Man-shaped, this monster growls with open fangs too; sharp tapered ears are fixed on a figure draped in an aristocratic overcoat and cape. Finger trembling, he traces undead and lawful evil before pausing over bat polymorph as one of the vampire’s characteristics.
A loud bang smacks against the side of the van and Eddie jumps high enough to hit his head on the Chevrolet’s roof. “Ow, Christ!” He hisses, rubbing the sore spot and glaring at Dustin grinning at him through the closed window.
“Come on,” he shouts, “Everyone’s here!”
Eddie scowls, leaving behind the manual to tumble out of the van. Dustin immediately starts pushing him from behind and Eddie whacks at him with his hands, “Lay off, man. I’m coming, okay.”
Dustin hums doubtfully, “Yeah, but I watched you sit in the van for the last ten minutes and that was only after I noticed you’d arrived. Who knows how long it was going to take you?”
He quickly opens the front door before Dustin pushes him right smack into it, but the younger boy continues shoving at Eddie until he stumbles into Steve’s living room. In a similar configuration to yesterday’s intervention, the party sits, lounges, or stands about the room, quietly talking.
On the couch, Robin sits cross-legged with Steve who’s flipping through a magazine. Eddie’s relieved to see that all four limbs are human-shaped, and mouth only curved into a soft pout as he contemplates the article in front of him.
Everyone pauses to look over at their loud entrance. Steve glances up and, meeting his calm expression, Eddie almost blushes at how uncoordinated he must have looked falling through the door. He averts his gaze to El who approaches him with an outstretched palm, “Are you ready?”
Eddie sighs but takes her hand; she leads him to the open floor and they sit across from each other, “Yeah, we might as well do this. So, you’re going to force the bat out or something?”
“There’s no guarantee that you can shift,” Lucas leans back against the wall next to Will with casually folded arms. “You could be a normal human with bat scars and that’s it.”
“Or I could be a vampire of the night,” Eddie counters darkly. “I’ve been craving meat lately.”
Max rolls her eyes, “You have not, you big liar. I saw you scoffing down Honey Crunch on your front porch only two days ago.”
“Yeah, well, I was high. Maybe weed mellows out the beast.”
Eddie’s gaze flies to Steve when he snorts, but Steve looks away, concentrating on the magazine that Eddie suddenly suspects he’s not actually reading.
The thought that he’s avoiding Eddie stirs a familiar sense of guilt, giving rise to the niggle that he’d tried to forget after the wolf left yesterday, further punctuated by Robin’s distinct stink-eye. Even amidst the fear that had gripped him, he’d been able to see a sad, dejected version of Steve in the down-turned tail and slow trudge away.
“I'm going to take you into the void,” El says, holding out both her hands over her knees and Eddie takes them at her urging. “When I visit Steve there, he is able to feel the wolf and communicate with him.”
“I sort of see him next to me, if it helps,” Steve finally pipes up, watching Eddie warily like he’s expecting him to reject the advice, but Eddie only nods grimly. He’s going to need all the tips he can get he suspects. “Do I let it possess me or something?”
Steve frowns, a hint of reproach about him, “My wolf doesn’t posses me, he is me. Just like I’m him.” He shakes his head at Eddie’s confusion, “If you have a bat or a vampire or, I don’t know, maybe you’ll have a wolf too, then just reach out to him. He wants to be a part of you and you’ll both figure it out from there.”
Eddie looks into the steady gaze of Steve’s hazel eyes and feels it like a hand over his own: Steve has done this before, and successfully. He just needs to trust in the rogue knight one more time. “Okay,” he says, closing his eyes and following El’s lead.
🐺🐺🐺
Steve throws his Fine Gardening magazine onto the coffee table and leans against Robin’s shoulder, she presses back. “Does it usually take this long with me,” he murmurs, trying to keep quiet for the two sitting silently in the middle of the room. Both El and Eddie have their eyes closed and hands clasped with the other. Max had turned the television to a snowy channel to help channel El’s concentration with the static sound.
She hums a negative, “But then, you two only did it to play around and see if there was more you could learn about yourself. This is Eddie trying to find out whether he even has another version to turn into.”
She grabs his arm suddenly, “Wait.” Steve blinks, unsure of what he’d seen other than to describe it as a pulse around Eddie. A long beat passes before the trick of the eye flickers again, so quickly that Steve can’t be sure of what he’s seeing.
In one rapid swoop, the air around Eddie contracts, pulling abruptly inwards until Eddie the human disappears to be replaced with a bat standing unsteadily in front of El. He blinks wide eyes, faltering on tiny feet before stumbling over to land on his back.
Eddie squawks in what Steve thinks is shock before frantically flapping his extended wings and tossing over to push up into the air, erratically darting around the suddenly panicking humans.
With one wing beating harder than the other, he drunkenly tilts and rolls into Mike’s long hair. Shrieking, Mike pulls Eddie out and flings him away even while crying out, “Shit! Sorry, Eddie! Sorry!”
Eddie cries out himself and flutters, gaining his momentum only to slam into the wall with a thump next to Dustin who leaps forward trying to catch him, but Eddie desperately twists before leaping higher, aiming for the peak of the ceiling.
“Catch him,” Will yells as Lucas runs out of the room.
“I’m trying,” Dustin shrieks in a tone that matches the high screeches of Eddie above them.
Robin shrugs off her boxy jacket, “Wait, I’ve got this.” She advances on Eddie as he zig zags against the wall again, but he must see her as a large threatening animal because he chitters wildly before smacking his wings at her face. Robin yelps and falls, only narrowly avoiding hitting her head on the ground by Max urgently jumping underneath to stop her rapid descent.
Lucas skids into the living room, triumphantly holding aloft the large pool skimmer usually stored in the garden shed. “Steve,” he yells before throwing it across the room.
Steve deftly catches the long handle in the air and, with a twist of his wrist, scoops Eddie mid-flight. Quickly flipping the pole, he entangles his small body in the net.
Panting or, in Mike’s case, holding down his hair, the group silently gather around the squirming bat version of Eddie as he shrieks and tries to bite his way out of the thin rope.
Steve thinks of his first fumbling and panicked steps: the distinct difference between having two legs extended to four, not even at the right height, let alone the terror of suddenly having a completely different way of looking and feeling the world had been indescribable. There are still scratches in the wooden floorboards from how hard he had dug his claws in to stop his legs from skidding in all directions.
“Back up, guys,” he says softly, keeping his tone low and soothing. “Hey, Eddie, hey,” he shushes, positioning the net against his torso so he can roll Eddie out of the mesh without letting him escape. Everyone steps back or sits in a chair, and Steve brings Eddie higher up to his chest so he can meet the eyes of the little guy.
Although his thinking or way of interpreting his surroundings may be a little different, Steve is always aware of the world as he would be as a human, and he can see that it’s the same for Eddie. The big wet eyes of his bat form aren’t that different from his human ones, Steve thinks, a little amused even while worried at how hard Eddie is panting.
“It’s okay,” Steve says, “You’re okay, you’re with friends, and this isn’t permanent. You’re just a bat for a little bit, Eddie, and you’ll be human in no time. Okay? You’re okay.” He keeps repeating reassuring nonsense, keeping his fingers firmly wrapped around squirming wings and resting Eddie against his heart.
As a wolf, Steve likes to lay his head over Robin’s heart, likes the proof that she is alive and well under him, and often finds himself calming under her steady thump, thump, thump.
Under his fingers, he can feel the frantic thrumming of Eddie’s heart start to calm too.
“That’s good,” he croons softly, stroking his thumb over the soft down of Eddie’s head. He takes stock of the little body in front of him: over Eddie’s nose the bridge is one long stripe of white, the rest of him covered in a deep brown while the ruff of his neck is almost golden, his ears are tapered as is the long tip of his pink tongue.
They all watch while Steve successfully calms Eddie as if he is a baby cradled to him. “Do you think that’s a were thing?” Asks Lucas, peering at Eddie as his breathing slows down, he blinks back up at him.
“I don’t know,” Will says thoughtfully, “Steve is pretty soothing to have around.” El nods while Mike shoots his friend a look of betrayal.
Steve rolls his eyes, “He was just scared. Look, now he’s had a moment to chill he’s with us again.” And, sure enough, little Eddie’s eyes are drooping as Steve continues to lightly pat him, clearly relaxing into the comforting gesture. He loosens his hold, still keeping a firm grip but not so tightly in fear of Eddie struggling again.
Max snorts as she peers down, “Oh yeah, there’s the big bad metalhead everyone fears.”
Eddie’s closing eyes snap open with a glare and he squeaks at her. Unfortunately, Steve thinks, the cuteness of it all only supports Max’s teasing. Robin meets his eyes over the kids’ heads and silently laughs in agreement.
“Okay,” Steve orders, “I think the lot of us in the same room may be too much for him right now. You guys skedaddle and we’ll let you know when he’s back to rights.”
Dustin looks doubtful, “What can you do that we can’t?”
Robin snorts, “Uh, Dusty-bun, Steve is literally the expert in this room when it comes to were-changes. You can’t research your way out of this one.”
Dustin grumps, “I could. If we didn’t have Steve, I could absolutely be the one to help him get back to normal.” He turns to the backpack shoved against the table. “Here,” he says, pulling out two books with photos of bats across the covers. Steve peers further into the bag and can see back-ups that apparently didn’t pass muster. “These are the books I brought on bats. If he starts craving blood, let me know — I have more on vampires when he needs them.”
Max takes them from his hands while Lucas steers Dustin towards the front door, where they’d left their bikes outside. Mike mutters a mocking noise that sounds like skedaddle and, with that, the room falls silent once more.
Robin and Steve look over at Max as she falls back onto the couch with El quickly following behind. She stares back belligerently, “What? Mom dropped me off and Eddie was our ride back.” El crosses her arms with a serene smile.
Steve sighs, “Okay, but we’re not doing anything exciting and you guys are making dinner.” The girls readily agree, heating leftovers from Steve’s fridge and serving the four of them as they sit in the living room, eating while watching a Bewitched marathon. At Steve’s instruction, Robin had brought down his blue hoodie with its tunnel-like pocket over his belly.
Little Eddie had curled up inside of it and Steve keeps one hand over him to provide what he hopes feels like shelter and comfort; under it, he can feel the heat of his small body and the steady rhythm of his breathing.
“You look like you’re pregnant,” Robin acerbically observes from the other end of the couch, feet crossed into her lap for the lotus position.
“Does that mean that I can finally eat butterscotch ice cream without you making that face?” He counters with a bitchy expression back.
“What face?” She protests even as she makes The Face. Max rises her brow to Steve, “Why does she look like that?”
“That summer at Scoops maybe put her off some flavours for life,” he shares. El ignores them all in favour of watching Samantha wiggling her nose to float Darrin out of a tree.
“If I have to smell USS Butterscotch one more time, I’m going to puke — lack of pregnancy be damned,” Robin warns.
The commercials blares once Samantha finishes rescuing her husband, and El moves to peek inside the hoodie, tentatively extending a finger and gasping when Eddie’s little bat foot comes out to grip it. “He feels so soft.”
Steve snickers at Robin and he thinks he feels what’s supposed to be a bat bite through the cotton in retaliation, but it’s hard to tell with the lack of sharp fangs behind it. He sobers for the younger members of the room, “Yeah, but he can’t stay this way forever. Can you sense anything from him, El?”
She closes her eyes while continuing to hold Eddie’s foot, “He is not upset like earlier, but I don’t think he is ready to come back to being human-Eddie yet either.”
Steve looks worriedly down at the bump over his stomach, “Is he okay? I ran around a lot at first too, but once I figured out what was happening I tried to turn human again as soon as possible.”
“Yeah, but you also didn’t know that it was possible to turn back to human,” Robin points out. “He could be chilling ‘cause he knows that everything is going to be okay.”
El hums, “No, I do not think that’s it.” She shrugs, gently untangling Eddie’s clawed toes to lean back into Max who shifts an arm and drapes it over El’s shoulders comfortingly. “But he is not willing to share either. I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your fault,” Robin reassures her as she peeks into the other end of the pocket, smirking as she waggles a playful finger at him. Steve can see the wide, wet eyes of Eddie peeking out at her in curiosity. “Maybe he knows that he’s cuter as a bat than as a stinky human boy.”
Eddie glares and snaps his small teeth in the air before sullenly turning, curling up and facing the other way. Once again, a small hidden lump in the hoodie. Steve sighs, “We’ll give him the night and, if he’s not back tomorrow, maybe you can look for him in the void, El? Ask him what’s going on or guide him back to being human again. Whatever it is that he needs since it’s not working for him right now.”
He glances at the stairs, “Do you guys want to stay over? You can sleep in one of the spare rooms?”
“I call third bedroom,” Robin calls, standing up decisively, “Second bedroom has a weird smell.” She points her finger at Steve’s opening mouth, “I don’t care if you can’t smell anything, which, weird. Since you’re the one with the super nose these days.”
She grimaces and says more quietly, “I don’t think I can bunk up tonight, all the screaming got me…” She waggles her hand around her ears and Steve nods, knowing that she needs some quiet time after a lot of stimulation.
Max smirks and takes El by the hand, “That’s cool, we can’t smell whatever weirdo smell your nose is picking up. Night guys.” The girls wave before heading upstairs and Steve shuts off the television.
Picking his way through the house he double checks that the windows and doors are locked before turning off the lights and heading to bed. Lying down, he snuggles little Eddie to him, the small body already curled on top of his chest and asleep.
If you enjoyed anything of this I hope you'll consider leaving a comment over on Ao3 - it would make my day! 💖🦇🐺💖
#steddie#swift wings and a brave heart#this is just a fun fic while I edit Copper Boy so I'm not being too formal with blogging. as you can see lol#for any newbies - I always post on ao3 first before blogging if you're wondering why you're seeing this chapter#werewolf steve harrington#bat eddie munson#eddie munson#steve harrington#stranger things
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horizon forbidden west | sheerside mountains 15/?
#horizon forbidden west#hfw#hfw landscapes#hfw sheerside mountains#uhhhhhh so the blog's been running on scheduled posts for a while (well. it always is but usually i'm around lol)#i just got back from an unexpected extended trip away from home with crappy internet#(not an emergency or anything. but i basically only had mobile data which i didn't want to use too much of)#and can i just say: pls stop this timeline i want to get off#sorry if i missed stuff from people! i'll be attempting to catch up#but. anyway. here's a pretty shot of the yosemite valley! i love how the river catches the light through the fog
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hello everyone i made a quick summary of main route ottosuba. hope this helps.
#rezero#otto suwen#natsuki subaru#YES THIS IS YET ANOTHER POST ABOUT HOW OTTO IS A LITTLE OBSESSED WITH SUBARU. people forget this fact sometimes while shipping him with peo#le other than subaru and its like. if he gets involved with other people now THEYRE gonna deal with his subaru obsession too and the image#of this happening is HILARIOUS to me. why must we ignore ottos subaru obsession when we can include it always for comedic effect.#ottosuba at arc 3-5 is mostly like “awww theyre kinda cute and funny together lol” and then ottosuba at arc 7-8 is like.#subaru beating up vincent and fondly thinking of it as pulling an otto while also being sad at the idea of otto dying while otto is going#feral bc “natsuki san i would let your terrorist daughter and 50 million other people die to save you <3 why wont you let me do that."#i. yeah this is an otto blog now im so sorry arc 8 has destroyed all my brain cells#arc 8 spoilers#gotta give props to main route ottosuba for still being insane IN MAIN ROUTE while kind of going under the radar about it
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hello there! it's me, Tortilla, known mostly as Mod by the people who have been following this blog for a While!
if you've ever scrolled for a bit here, you've probably Seen that I've tried a few times to get back into posting more often and failed comically as i grappled with the dreaded Mental Eel Nesses and Executive Dysfunction, among other things. especially since ask blogs aren't as popular as they were back in the day when i made this blog (2015! turned 9 years last aug 15th! that's an entire child. jin owes me a lot of child support,)
(before anyone gets scared, no I'm not deleting anything lol gimme a sec to word this thought)
okay so like. cutting straight to the point not gonna get sentimental right now I'll save that for later: i want to keep this blog active REALLY bad, but as much as I'd like to, for multiple reasons i cannot draw as much as i did back in the day, which is like... the main thing i usually post here. so I've been pondering for the past year or so What to Do about it
my one idea is to turn this into a general kgpr blog and reblog other people's art and official stuff and the alike here, instead of keeping it Just My Stuff
but the thing is, if i DO that i would want to change my url, because reblogging art to a place that's named "badly drawn--" whatever is. i Don't Want That y'know? it's disrespectful lol
the thing is that that's soooo many links that would Break. among other things. (+ i have nooo clue what id change the name to but that's a different issue)
so like, my question here is,
#...ngl i could swear i had more to say in this post but i forgot so uh. jazz hands#mod post#ive been going back and forth on this for a While lol..drafting posts and deleting them and rewording#life's been rough but kp's been there for me always and recently ive been back in the pit again#(managed to drag some of my friends in! they're having fun)#and ive been doing a doodle or two here and there but they're not in the badly drawn™ style#and after nearly a decade i STILL dont know if im allowed to post my normal style art here#(yes i know it's my blog i can do whatever. my brain works in mysterious ways. not even my therapist knows how it works)#if i do repurpose this id definitely go back and make the organization system better too lol which may take a bit#since there's like. over 2k posts or smth here? last i checked anyway#maybe more#might be over 3k but id rather lowball it#anyways im rambling uhhhhh#feel free to give more options/ideas if what i said doesnt feel Quite like the solution ig?#i just know ive been getting new followers still even when i havent been posting and it makes me feel bad like OH NO.... I HAVENT POSTED....
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examining a seemingly normal image only to slowly realize the clear signs of AI generated art.... i know what you are... you cannot hide your true nature from me... go back where you came from... out of my sight with haste, wretched and vile husk
#BEGONE!!! *wizard beam blast leaving a black smoking crater in the middle of the tumblr dashboard*#I think another downside to everyone doing everything on phone apps on shitty tiny screens nowadays is the inability to really see details#of an image and thus its easier to share BLATANTLY fake things like.. even 'good' ai art has pretty obvious tells at this point#but especially MOST of it is not even 'good' and will have details that are clearly off or lines that dont make sense/uneven (like the imag#of a house interior and in the corner there's a cabinet and it has handles as if it has doors that open but there#are no actual doors visible. or both handles are slightly different shapes. So much stuff that looks 'normal' at first glance#but then you can clearly tell it's just added details with no intention or thought behind it. a pattern that starts and then just abruptly#doesn't go anywhere. etc. etc. )#the same thing with how YEARS ago when I followed more fashion type blogs on tumblr and 'colored hair' was a cool ''''New Thing''' instead#of being the norm now basically. and people would share photos of like ombre hair designs and stuff that were CLEARLY photoshop like#you could LITERally see the coloring outside of the lines. blurs of color that extend past the hair line to the rest of the image#or etc. But people would just share them regardless and comment like 'omg i wish I could do this to my hair!' or 'hair goallzzzz!! i#wonder what salon they went to !!' which would make me want to scream and correct them everytime ( i did not lol)#hhhhhhggh... literally view the image on anything close to a full sized screen and You Will SEe#I don't know why it's such a pet peeve of mine. I think just as always I'm obsessed with the reality and truth of things. most of the thing#that annoy me most about people are situations in which people are misinterpreting/misunderstanding how something works or having a misconc#eption about somehting thats easily provable as false or etc. etc. Even if it's harmless for some random woman on facebook to believe that#this AI generated image of a cat shaped coffee machine is actually a real product she could buy somewhere ... I still urgently#wish I could be like 'IT IS ALL AN ILLUSION. YOU SEE???? ITS NOT REALL!!!!! AAAAA' hjhjnj#Like those AI shoes that went around for a while with 1000000s of comments like 'omg LOVE these where can i get them!?' and it's like YOU#CANT!!! YOU CANT GET THEM!!! THEY DONT EXIST!!! THE EYELETS DONT EVEN LINE UP THE SHOES DONT EVEN#MATCH THE PATTERNS ARE GIBBERISH!! HOW CAN YOU NOT SEE THEY ARE NOT REAL!??!!' *sobbing in the rain like in some drama movie*#Sorry I'm a pedantic hater who loves truth and accuracy of interpretation and collecting information lol#I think moreso the lacking of context? Like for example I find the enneagram interesting but I nearly ALWAYS preface any talking about it#with ''and I know this is not scientifically accurate it's just an interesting system humans invented to classify ourselve and our traits#and I find it sociologically fascinating the same way I find religion fascinating'. If someone presented personality typing information wit#out that sort of context or was purporting that enneagram types are like 100% solid scientific truth and people should be classified by the#unquestionaingly in daily life or something then.. yeah fuck that. If these images had like disclaimers BIG in the image description somewh#re like 'this is not a real thing it's just an AI generated image I made up' then fine. I still largely disagree with the ethics behind AI#art but at least it's informed. It's the fact that people just post images w/o context or beleive a falsehood about it.. then its aAAAAAA
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Just wanted to post a quick note saying today is the 5th anniversary of when I finally went to my first 5SOS show. Every year I think about how wildly different my fandom experience would've been if I'd been able to attend previous tours, how everything aligned just right for me to finally go to MYT, how I almost talked myself out of attending the night before, how completely unrecognizable my life would be today if I hadn't gone. I probably wouldn't have a blog to post this to. You wouldn't know me, I wouldn't know you. I never would've met so many of my friends. I wouldn't have ever met my best friend, the best friend I've ever known. I never would've rediscovered my love for writing. I genuinely don't know how I would be spending my days and I wonder if they would still be filled with the kind of joy I have found here in this community.
It feels fitting that this reflective day coincides with the last show of this tour, a tour that has been powered by appreciation for the bond we share and celebration of the time we've all spent together. Keeping up with this tour has been impossibly fun (and sometimes just plain impossible) and I can't think of a better way to have spent the past three months. I'm happy to have experienced it - and the past 5 years - with this band and with all of you. Thank you to this band, to my friends, to anyone who's ever interacted with me here and most of all, to Past Me for buying those tickets all those years ago. I wouldn't have a place to call home without you. 💙
#emo hours 🤪✌🏻#annnnd that's enough sincerity for the year soz about all that 😌#I didn't start my blog until a few weeks later in 2018 but that concert was the turning point#still to this date possibly the most magical night of my life#so that's the date i celebrate#and i find it lovely that it's today with this last show#i purposely didn't mention 'The Break' bc I have... i think a different take on that than most lol#which will be addressed in the coming days for sure#(i have a few asks pertaining to it that I've been holding bc I haven't yet had time to give them the kind of attention I'd like#and also bc I'm interested to see what is and isn't said at the show tonight so I can respond with the fullest picture possible)#today is for celebrating#this tour has been an amazing experience and I'm so happy to have immersed myself in it the way i did here and in the dms with my people#and the party surely will not be ending for a while bc i have hundreds of IG posts to sort thru and make backlogged posts about 😁😁😁#all this to say I love this band and I've loved having this blog#thank you for indulging me#both in this post and on this site in general 😌🫶🏻#personal#the 5sos show tour prague#kh4f post
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good news for all my haters: im not coming back. not properly. i think social media and being around ppl in general is destroying me so im gonna just focus my energy on other stuff
ill probably still be a little bit active occassionally but for now i think il just stick to posting art etc. im moving to sheezy.art (which is down for maintenance rn but opens for registration again on fridays!) bc the energy there is much nicer for me.. but ill still post on here and insta. im also gonna be working on building my own website again!! so bookmark it and maybe some day itll have cool stuff on it.... :]
#idk ill see how this goes but ive been like lurking here for a couple days and every time without fail it makes me feel shitty#may not be a permanent thing but i have a couple safeguards in place now to stop me from getting sooooo bad. i think#i deleted all the apps off my phone. which has helped a lot esp deleting insta for reels#and i actually made another blog for like if i ever go Cazy again. for like vents and stuff . altho if im not on social media at all it#shldnt be a prblem#i wont share that but u can ask for it if u want. tho unlikely ill post for a while idk#for the record my neocities has like nothing on it rn. its essentially a series of tests from when i started last yr#and got nowhere lollll.. but im hoping to have a lot of fun with it soon#lol this whole thing is a little stupid. and i feel bad but just know its all my own fault. my own issues etc#its happened b4 itll happen time and time again i think. so im just gonna part ways w it#from now on if im gonna overshare it has to be in a lengthy edited well written blog post !!!!!!!!!!!#oke. bye#i do actually have smth to post later on my rnm blog but whatevaaa#oh ill start up my queues again too
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Hawkeye has virtually no shame about public displays of emotional vulnerability and mental instability, imo.
I’ve seen a lot of people who place a lot of importance on Hawkeye’s “If this keeps up, people are gonna realize I'm as crazy as I think I am,” line in Hawk’s Nightmare but honestly I just see it as mainly a wry acknowledgement that he’s acting less than sane in public and weirding out his childhood friends back home by detailing his nightmares to them, with a side of alluding to his actual fear, which is being crazy, as he tells Sidney over and over during that conversation. The key word there is “think” not “realize” imo.
Sidney reassures him by telling him his nightmares mean he’s sane, not by telling him that they’ll go away and he’ll stop publically sleepwalking. In fact he implies it’s something that will continue until the war’s over, and Hawkeye doesn’t seem to have a problem with that as long as it doesn’t mean he’s actually going insane.
And Hawkeye never really demonstrates any concern over people witnessing his breakdowns, and in fact seems to go out of his way to make them public half the time. I mean you got your most blatant example in Bananas Crackers and Nuts where he’s happy to exaggerate his feelings to make people think he’s insane to get a break. But even when it’s genuinely serious (and less cartoony, tonally), he’s also got no issues making public scenes.
He doesn’t quietly seek out Potter or BJ alone when he decides yes he is in fact seriously ill in Bless You Hawkeye, he walks right into everyone having a meeting and announces that he’s gonna die. He’s not only perfectly fine with Sidney visting him for a consultation in Hawk’s Nightmare, he’s the first to acknowledge why he’s there during the poker game while Sidney’s trying to be politely subtle (”Mind if I come along?” “Fine with me Doc, as long as your couch has wheels on it.”) He also ofc calls his childhood friends and tells them he’s having fucked up nightmares about them, tells everyone else about them to ask for their opinions, and tries to have a heart to heart with Frank about being afraid to go to sleep.
He makes a joke about cracking up at the farewell party in GFA, and tells some random patient he just had his “head in a cast,” apropros of nothing. He throws a tantrum in Adam’s Ribs, he publically screams out his feelings at the end of For Want of a Boot, he loudly narrates his impending panic attack in CAVE (and says that the reason he kept quiet about it for a while is specifically because he didn’t want Potter to choose a less safe place to retreat to on his account), he casually describes his emotional state as “mania” to Potter in Depressing News while, yk, building a big tower for 2 days without breaks in the middle of the camp, he breaks down in front of BJ - a guy he’d only recently met - in The Late Captain Pierce, he angrily confronts everyone about feeling betrayed and abandoned by them in the phone scene in GFA. We don’t see what he does after Dr. Pierce and Mr. Hyde but he casually mentions the insomnia to Winchester in Dr. Winchester and Mr. Hyde so he’s fine talking about it. He has two public breakdowns in the O.R. that I can remember off-hand.
And he never demonstrates any shame or regret about the public nature of any of this.
He never tries to hide his feelings - I think the closest he gets is in Sons and Bowlers, and he proceeds to tell Charles how he’s feeling for the entire rest of the night in that one - and while nearly everyone else gets plotlines where something’s troubling them that they don’t want to talk about, Hawkeye never ever does. He’s usually the one prying these feelings out of other characters and chiding them for not talking about them. Even in GFA what’s stopping him from talking about it is the amnesia - he’s reluctant and upset about having the conversations about the bus because he’s subconsciously afraid of remembering, but he still does, and after he has his breakthrough he willingly talks it through with Sidney multiple times afterwards as well, both offscreen in Sidney’s mention of follow-up sessions (including Hawkeye explicitly wanting more of them), and on screen when Sidney visits the 4077.
And in Bless You Hawkeye, the other trauma amnesia episode, he’s perfectly willing to a) accept it could be psychosomatic, b) talk about it with Sidney to find the root cause, and c) joke about it afterwards during a poker game.
And then you got a bunch of moments and jokes where he shamelessly reveals personal information about himself, sometimes likely exaggerations that he’s still fine with people believing, sometimes clearly accurate. I sucked my thumb until my twenties, I can’t get hard, here’s the kind of niche sex I like, I’m a coward and proud, I’m fucking my married ex, I was jealous of my dad’s girlfriend, monologue about how much I miss my dad to a stranger, monologue about how miserable I am to a stranger, monologue about how terrified I am to a stranger, etc etc.
There’s also overt commentary on this - in Check-Up for example, Hawkeye suggests that Trapper got an ulcer because he’s the strong silent type who keeps his feelings in, in contrast to himself. In Bless You Hawkeye Sidney points out that Hawkeye never holds back when it comes to his feelings about the war, which is why he’s assuming the root cause is something Hawkeye isn’t even consciously aware of and goes back to Hawkeye’s childhood.
When it comes to Hawkeye it’s very difficult for me to imagine a scenario where he would try to hide anything about himself, whether that’s his feelings or something about his life, and I have a feeling it was the same for the writers of the show most of the time too lol, hence relying on amnesia twice for the mystery and reveal structure.
#mash#hawkeye mash#marley on mash#another from the drafts that was missing like 2 sentences to turn into a relatively complete post#rambly as hell but yk with an intro and outro#i have a feeling i wrote this after seeing some take about hawkeye fearing people knowing he's mentally ill based on the first bit#and probably didn't post it because i prefer to post positive takes rather than one sided arguments when i can#but this doesn't really read that argumentative to me and it's been so long idr what post i was reacting to lol so i might as well put#this list of shameless hawkeye moments on my actual blog#(not related to emotions or mi but also shout out to hawkeye walking into the mess tent naked to win a bet that he proposed#and going to morning assembly in nothing but a jockstrap while iirc some general was visiting lol as further moments of shamelessness)
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this is your reminder that if I don’t follow you on tumblr I still love you.
#I hate that tumblr did the freaking mutual thing because now everyone can see#dash curation is such a personal thing and it’s also a brain thing#If you are intellectually stimulating it’s better if I just check your blog now and then#(which doesn’t mean if I do follow you you are intellectually not stimulating)#it’s just. a delicate balance and vibe#and it’s one of those things where the more you say it and draw attention to it the more awkward it becomes#But also I’ve been wanting to make this post for a while!#idk. it’s something I’ve wrestled with for so long and then eventually I was just like. I need the vibe of the dash to be a certain way#just for my own sanity and that involves not following a lot of people tbh#anyway I just. Yeah. It’s a public space so the necessity of boundaries being established is normal and everyone’s gotta#but it’s also a community and I know how hurtful it can be to suddenly realize someone is not following you who once was#idk. I strongly encourage everyone to unfollow me#and check in when you want if you want lol#who would WANT these things on their dash#just all interspersed#No one cares Maria it’s not important etc.#but yeah it’s just very. when my depression works the graveyard shift all of the people#I’ve ghosted stand there in the room#like. It can FEEL like that
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wow somehow got to 100 follows here...hi..... hi guys..... i think asks r open if anyone has little drawing reqs.... or actual asks idk u_u
#i wanted to run a poll a while ago actually abt thoughts on how to describe jimmys hair colour#amongst other things...#like i personally subscribe to the copper hair thing. but apparently some people think blonde#strawberry blonde maybe but blonde? no way.... that santa guy calls him orange at one point doesnt he#it is strange that with different hairstyles like. copper is the closest u get to ginger...like... why....#anyway. hope u enjoy my dumb doodle blog... i have wips im working on so ill post them at some point i guess...#i also tried to do more of that thing i posted with the bullies recently but erm i will probably not do every clique like that LOL#so if u wanted to see specific charas u can ask. there are only a few charas i dont like enough to draw and theyre the usual suspects#LOL. bye
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ack sorry I was rude about the bathroom problem script I misunderstood what you meant </3 thank you for being a great resource for the sunny stans
No worries lmfao I was being crypto maybe unnecessarily but more for fun… trying to lure people to my blog… lol
But I promise my main goal here is to make sure fans have access to as much Sunny content and resources as possible!
That’s my whole motivation for this blog, after years of searching the depths of the internet for old stuff and running into dozens of dead links (why!! @alwayssunnyfxx !? why did you privatise/delete so many videos!?) and watching almost every social media site fall apart to bad AI search and bots, I want a place where that’s not going to happen (as long as Blogger stays in existence, I guess)
It’s definitely a work in progress, and there’s still a lot to come, to be added and collected, scripts included, but hopefully we will soon have a great resource and fun and interesting site for the community, and a place for great future content and, of course, Season 17+ updates :)
#iasip#ask#ppb#woring on a formative post#not rn lol i’m tipsy#but yo publish monday probs?#i need 5 peer reviews on this thing#anyway i am trying to pander this blog to everyone#so you can read the posts and get it#no matter if you’ve seen the show once through while under the influence or 100 times#you can see these things and go yeah! or go ohhh#that’s the goal :)#on top of all the FUN STUFF!#anyway if anyone wants to join… again. i have a discord and what not#:$#also like#s16 tracking everything on my own was fun#but i hated literally HATED how isolated my stuff was lol#like it was just a personal spreadsheet i could figure out how to format here#this blog is more freedom :)
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