#so much angst to explore

[bookdragon-shenanigans]

btw if i ever do write fourth wing fanfic you best believe i will be writing in all of my military kid trauma into violet

[jewelielie-art]

Happy ISATmas to my victim @worstplayr ! Surprise! I was your Santa! ✧⁠◝⁠(⁠⁰⁠▿⁠⁰⁠)⁠◜⁠✧ You asked for Loop tears, I really hope this suffices!!

Go check out @isat-secretsanta-2024 to see all the amazing art and fics this wonderful community are gifting each other! I was so happy to be a part of this and got to make so many friends in the process!

Still images of the GIF under the cut (also higher quality. I had to compress that GIF pretty hard for Tumblr to accept it.)

[ctrlzxoo]

even if your eyes are open, i will help you close them.

Afterword: Ivan’s thoughts

[kat1nkulta]

I can’t stop thinking about Loop. Imagine doing everything, anything, to get out of a traumatic situation but the price is you. Your body is gone, your name is gone, your family doesn’t recognize you, you feel like most of your memories of them are gone too anyway. Suddenly you’re denied your identity. It’s like YOU never existed… and someone else took your place. You, whose biggest fears are forgetting and being forgotten in turn. You, who’s hesitant to change and now you’re forced to. You can’t even really blame anyone else because you did get your wish, right?

It’s explained clearly in the game, but the implications of it just hit me extra hard sometimes. Siffrin is as much of a study of Loop as Loop is of Siffrin. They share(d) their fears too so mal du pays words essentially becoming the truth to Loop is just… 🪨🪨🪨🙁🙁🙁💥💥💥💥

What do you do when all you have is ripped from you, all your worst fears come true, and youre forced to just… come to terms with it?

[unclewaynemunson]

I definitely think it takes Eddie a while to accept that Steve changed. He remembers what he was like in high school.

When Steve asks him out, for whatever reason, Eddie says yes. But he’s determined not to fall in love, because deep down Harrington’s still a dick. But he’s cute, and Eddie can smile and play pretend.

But then! Steve goes full happy relationship mode, he tells Robin (obv), introduces Eddie to the other adults as his bf, and is just generally being sweet.

MY SWEET ANON I HOPE YOU'LL STILL SEE THIS!!!

I'm so sorry it took me ages to answer this one! But I really loved the idea of this (the good ol' steddie + misunderstanding about what they mean to each other with a dash of terrible communication skills my beloved) so i wanted to give it my proper attention, which i didn't have enough time for over the past few months. Buuut the words have finally found their way to my keyboard so here is the first part of what probably will turn into a 3-part ficlet, I hope it's something like what you had in mind when you sent this ask to me <3

---

Eddie has been acting weird all day. Maybe Steve is too much of a romantic, but he can't help it: he wanted to celebrate this day. Exactly a month ago, he asked Eddie out. And it's been good. They've spent a lot of time together. They've been on lots of dates, spent plenty of nights together... But today, things are different, somehow. Eddie is different. He turned Steve down for a dinner date, he didn't stop by Family Video during lunchtime, and when Steve shows up at the trailer to surprise him with flowers, he merely frowns and pulls back from their kiss before it can even properly get started.

'Everything alright?' Steve asks, trying to catch his boyfriend's gaze – which isn't exactly easy with how Eddie is turning away from him to not-so-gently put the flowers down in a corner of the trailer's living room.

'Yeah, sure,' Eddie mumbles, not really looking at him. 'It's just – I didn't really expect to see you today. We didn't have plans.'

Steve chuckles, trying to get the tension out of his chest. 'Didn't know I was expected to schedule an appointment before coming here.' He tries to play it off as a joke, but the tone of his voice doesn't really want to cooperate.

Eddie finally turns back towards him and Steve catches the end of an eye-roll.

'I'm just not feeling too great today, alright?' It sounds a bit stiff and Steve pauses. He wonders if he did something wrong, if he somehow invaded Eddie's space – even though he has showed up at the trailer on countless evenings in the past month.

'What's wrong?'

'Nothing,' Eddie answers, a little bit too fast. 'I told you, I'm not feeling so well.'

And now that he can see his face properly, Steve notices that Eddie is indeed looking paler than usual.

'Hey, don't worry about it,' he says. 'I can stay to take care of you, if you want to. We don't have to do anything. You can go to bed early and I'll keep you company. I can make you some soup, read to you... You could've just told me you're not feeling good, you know. I would've picked up some fruit on my way over here and stopped by the library for you.'

'You don't have to do any of that, Steve.'

Steve tries to ignore the fact that it's been ages since Eddie has last called him by his official first name. He doesn't like the sound of it.

'But I want to,' he says instead. He takes a step towards Eddie, lifts his arms to wrap them around him – but Eddie swats his arms away before he can properly embrace him.

'Don't.' He sounds cold and detached, so different from how he usually sounds. 'Don't act like this is something it isn't.'

'Like this is something –' Steve echoes, completely caught off-guard by this turn of events. 'Like what?'

'Jesus Christ, you really don't know when to stop, do you?'

'What?' He takes a stumbling step backwards, driven away by the force in Eddie's words.

'We're not – like that,' Eddie stutters out. 'We're just fucking around, aren't we? So you don't need to pretend. You don't need to bring me flowers. You don't need to take care of me when I'm sick. You don't owe me anything, alright? You can go home.'

Steve takes another step backwards, until his back collides with the door of the trailer. He blindly grabs the door handle behind him.

'Alright,' he says, trying desperately not to let his voice tremble audibly. 'I hear you, loud and clear. I'll – I'll leave you alone, then.'

Read pt2 here (Edit: it's actually 5 parts now. You can read the whole thing on ao3 here)

[dryya-doesnt]

Brothers: born from the same roots yet branching out so differently

Trying to get consistent portraits for the brothers I hope they look related… I mean compared to how I draw Laurance. Same face syndrome begone… I have an inconsistent art style.

[shoot-i-messed-up]

Was always worried about the angst of unrequited love, had never realized the sheer amount of comedic potential that it has.

Imagine one-sided Superbat where Clark is fully aware that Bruce has a crush on him but is being his repressed self about it, and Clark is just like, “I’m not gonna touch that :) you’re going to figure that out for yourself, buddy, and in the meantime, I’m just going to have a good time and be best friends with you as you inevitably pull yourself together enough to either fall out of love or to confess :) and I’ll just let you down gently because I care about you :)” but he absolutely 100% is using it to his advantage in the meantime. His puppy dog eyes had never been so effective before. He’s gotten out of Monitor Duty three times in the past month.

[oneluckydragon]

"Suddenly the world was gray and dull and my heart was so heavy I felt like I couldn’t move, let alone make it back to Treasure Town. But because of Echo’s last wish… I was able to keep living.”

--- --- --- --- ---

SORA : (Partner)

Abilities: Justified / Inner Focus

Nature: Gentle / Hardy

Moveset: Aura Sphere / Metal Claw / Poison Jab / Dragon Pulse

[aster-draws]

so... very important question. In Better Halves, are Danny and Tim kisses going to become a lot more common now that they've had their first real one? Please, for the love of god, don't make them wait 10 more chapters.

lovingly, an anon that needs to see them fuck nasty

Okay fair question! Yes, kisses will be (relatively) more common now, but I don't count this as their first 'real' kiss- although arguably it should be- the first real kiss is somewhere in chapter 34? Ish. More or less around there.

Look. I said slow burn and I goddamn MEANT it. it's gonna be nearly 200k before they Approach the idea of it not being fake anymore (despite the fact that it never really was to begin with). they're. complete unmitigated disasters.

and as for them fucking nasty (with understanding that was likely meant to be somewhat sarcastic). Currently the plan is to keep it at a teen rating. But. obviously aspects of this have gotten away from me in the past. Keep an eye on the rating because. Idk there are gonna be moments and that's all I'll say. (if i write them, i'll change the rating as I do, so hopefully with a good few chapters before hand. or maybe I'll post an alt version with the ma content? idk we shall cross the bridge when we arrive to it)

For your reference though, here's how many kisses are in each chapter i have completely written (this may depress you) (also below a read more for the spoilers aspect of it all.)

chapter 20- 1 kiss (on cheek)

21- 0 kisses

22- 0 kisses

23- 0 kisses

24- 0 kisses (somehow oh my GOD)

25- 1 kiss (on lips)

26- 1 kiss (on lips) (also the first Proper kiss since chapter 19. imo)

27- 2 kisses (1 on forehead, 1 on lips)

28- 0 kisses

29- 0 kisses

30- 0 kisses

do not let the amount of 0's grieve you, for most of those the boys aren't even in the same state (or country) so. not chapter 24 tho that's fucking miserable yearning i won't lie

[inamindfarfaraway]

It’s so messed up that King Candy could just remove his subjects’ memories whenever he wanted. I find it hard to believe that in fifteen years, not one single person in all of Sugar Rush felt sympathy for the homeless, persecuted, abused nine-year-old kid whose only crime was existing. The palette swap racers were never shown bullying her. The other racers in general could have been subject to Taffyta’s bullying if they didn’t fall in line with her or when Vanellope wasn’t around to take all the fire. I bet they had some moments of compassion. They’re kids, not monsters. A decade and a half is a long time to stay bullies with no basic decency whatsoever at any point. Especially when you remember that Vanellope’s stolen code still left her with the sense that she was a racer and subconscious driving skills, and her fellow racers were similarly programmed to like and be loyal to her. They could have been nice to her without allowing her to race. But it wouldn’t have mattered. Not with King Candy’s hands in the code.

Imagine having an arc of personal growth and forming a bond with Vanellope, who treasures it immensely, only to have all those memories and thoughts and feelings forcibly ripped out of your consciousness. By an authority figure you trusted and admired, no less. Would he always lock up Vanellope’s memories too, so that she wouldn’t expect anyone to give her a chance? Or do you think he’d let her feel betrayed and abandoned every now and then?

[trash-gremlin]

could you imagine how good spirit animals would be if it wasn't written as a children's series

[valewritessss]

I hate it when people want the actual books to have some non-middle grade appropriate things in them.

Like, yes, I get wanting some dark Percy or whatever but realistically, Rick would never make Percy do some vile shit because it’s a middle grade book. And I’m talking about the really vile things people have written in fanfics that would make the book 10x darker.

I understand that most of us are past middle-grade ages but that age category is still the main target.

“Rick’s a coward for not doing this” or maybe he’s writing age appropriate stuff for the age range he specializes in. Don’t get me wrong some things would actually be cool if they happened but others, are actually too much.

This especially goes to people who want Rick to actually write ~things~ happening with percabeth and other popular ships. THEY ARE MINORS. RICK IS AN ADULT. THE BOOKS ARE FOR MIDDLE-GRADE.

Rick didn’t write “they had sex to have babies” when he was writing a book about how Greek gods came to be, what makes you think he would write something even more descriptive for his usual stories.

Yes, there are some mature topics in different stories, but they are topics that are addressed in a way that doesn’t surpass the middle-grade line.

Write fanfics about it all you want but complaining because Percy murdering his whole family in a fit of rage(I’ve seen this before okay) is not actually canon is crazy.

[cessmaga]

when you think about it ben's life is kinda sad and fucked up, and probably overworked

i mean unlike other teen heroes, they still hide their identity, they still have much time for their personal life and a privacy

and ben however, literally got his identity outed and he can't even have a day off without some bad guy bursting out of your door, probably because the villain knows what you are and knows where you live, and I think I read somewhere that he's considering moving to plumbers because how much trouble he's bringing to his hometown

and the fact that you are really well known, not just the people won't stop bothering you because you are popular, some people are not gonna treat you like a normal person because of how powerful you are, and not to mention how it will affect your school life and social life, you are basically not one with your classmates anymore because how different you are now, and you can't keep up with your grades because of your hero life (the fact that they confirms that ben still goes to school, it's just always away, and the fact that's he's considering going to college)

also he's really overworked, the show confirms that he works a part time job i think, and idk if he's paid at the plumber at all, and nah how's this dude not break down and collapse yet cuz all the school, a job and a hero life pack all to you and still be fine 😭😭

ben's case is kinda different from the other teen heroes cause man, he's isolated and alone from his hero life from the other people

[mistmarigold]

What if Sunjae doesn’t die the night he meets Sol? (lovely runner au)

Sunjae didn’t care about the cold or the falling snow as he stands outside Sol’s building, seeing the lights open and close as she makes her way to her apartment. There was a deep hollowness inside him, a void that has been there since past 15 years, a festering wound that never really had an opportunity to heal because he would never let it heal.

Seeing Sol again after all those years - as his fan, no less - he wasn’t sure what to feel. It was almost as if his heart and mind were numb yet he could hear and feel the screeches of his own internal screams, demanding to be let out.

The door to Sol’s apartment closes. A moment later, the light shuts down too. But he remains frozen, standing there, unable to move.

“Ryu Sunjae?”

It wasn’t until Sol’s mother, Park Bok-soon, came in to his view that he realised she called out to him.

He bowed his head in greeting, “hello.”

“Oh, it’s so nice to see you! Have you been well?”

He was so, so tempted to just nod and smile and be on his way. But it felt as if his limbs had given up on him; drained from keeping up the charade for all these years and at last gave up.

“Why don’t you come in? I’ll make you some hot tea - it’s snowing already. Nobody will see you at this time so don’t worry about anything,” she offered and gestured him to follow her.

Oh, how he wanted to follow her and see Sol again. Maybe talk to her as Sunjae - the boy who loved her for all these years.

He took a step forward and then held himself back, “I… should go. Thank you for your consideration.”

Bok-soon took a good look at him this time around then back up at their home and then she said, “if you have time, can we talk for a moment? Right ahead, there is a small playground there, we can sit there.”

Sunjae wasn’t sure what she wanted to say but it was an excuse to linger and so he did.

They walked to the playground and then sat on the opposite ends of a bench there.

Bok-soon wriggled her hands in her lap and then began, “I know it’s been years to this and perhaps you don’t even remember it anymore but I realised I never properly thanked you.”

Sunjae’s hand clenches the edge of his coat.

She continued, “if it wasn’t for you that day, I would’ve lost Sol back then. I know that day must’ve been hard for you too, I don’t wish to bring up bad memories.”

She looked at him then, his gaze seemingly empty but harbouring years worth of feelings.

“I just wanted to apologise for everything Sol said then - things haven’t been easy for her. It took her a long time to make peace with what happened. And you weren’t to blame for it, you were just a boy back then and you saved her life. Recently, she even asked about you-“

“She did?” He interrupted.

Bok-soon nodded, “she asked who saved her and how she wishes she knew so she could thank them.”

The small bloom of hope in Sunjae’s heart wilted but still retained some of its life.

“She doesn’t remember anything about those days either. She doesn’t remember the curses or the screaming. From her point of view, she doesn’t even know she yelled at you,” she chuckles. “I couldn’t tell her that it was her favourite Idol, could I now? She would think I was messing with her. A part of me was scared too because I didn’t know anything about you.”

She took a deep breath.

“Sunjae, I don’t know what you were doing here. But I’m seeing it as a sign to tie loose ends - to make apologies and express gratitude. You saved Sol, but with her, you also saved me and my family. And so, I want to do the least bit I can: invite you over for a meal. Whenever you have time, if you would like to come, I don’t want to pressurise you but I would be so delighted if you come.” Bok-soon gave him an encouraging, wide smile.

She rummaged through her bag to tear out a paper from a tiny notebook and wrote down her address and number on it.

“We live in that building right there, on 3rd floor. I’ve listed down the apartment number and my phone too, just in case. Here, take it. I know it’s too late but let me treat you for what you did back then - knowing that it won’t be enough.”

She enclosed the small piece of paper in his hand before getting up to leave, “take care of yourself, Sunjae. If you’re well, Sol is well. That girl adores you far too much, alongside the entire country! It’s all the good karma you’ve been accumulating.”

She started walking back towards the building, when Sunjae abruptly stood up, “what about Sol? Wouldn’t she be startled to see me?”

Bok-soon nodded, “I’m sure she’ll be but she can get over it. As long as you don’t mind, I think she should know you’re the reason she is alive and well today. It’s only fair. But even if you don’t want her to know, you’re always welcome to come as an old neighbour. Then, I’ll see you someday soon, goodbye!”

The snow fell heavily and Sunjae kept standing there, clutching a piece of paper with a thousand thoughts and feelings assaulting him - as if they never left. He didn’t know what life had in store for him but he had been given a reason to wait for another day.

Back in his car, his manager asks him, “it’s quite late and snowing a lot too, should I drop you off at your place instead of the hotel? It’ll be more comfortable.”

In a daze, Sunjae nodded at him, not really registering his words while holding on to Sol’s bright smile - same as the first day they met - to, at last, anchor himself.

—

Part 2 here.

Note: No taxi driver in this (hopefully) multi-part fic bec there’s already enough for me to lose my mind over aka plot builders

[noturlondonboy]

You Would Never Hurt Me

Bishova angst-shot

Pairing: Kate Bishop x Yelena Belova

Warnings: angst angst angst, nightmare, gun, choking

A/N: the girls are having a hard time and I’m so sorry, i just needed to write something short about them struggling

——

Kate isn’t a complete stranger to being woken up with a gun pointed to her head, but she’s definitely not used to it being Yelena itching to pull the trigger.

The cold metal of the muzzle of the gun is pressed harshly into her forehead, biting into her skin. She lays frozen, not even daring to breathe, her body pinned to the bed by Yelena’s weight. Her girlfriend is breathing hard, her teeth bared as soft snarls echo from her throat. There’s a wild look in her eye, the same hollow, glassy sheen that overtakes her in the throes of bloodlust and sorrow.

A strike of fear tries to shoot up Kate’s spine, but she clamps it down and refuses to humor it. Yelena is stuck in her head. Yelena had a nightmare. Yelena doesn’t know it’s her.

Yelena would never hurt her, she tells herself. Yelena would never hurt me.

“Yelena,” Kate dares to whisper, her lips barely moving. The blonde’s hand is pressed firmly to her chest, the flesh of her palm molded by Kate’s sternum. It’s started to move, inching to Kate’s neck, fingertips hooking over her collarbones. Kate doesn’t dare to swallow the saliva that’s building under her tongue.

There’s no response, no change to the way Yelena’s brows are furrowed, no twitch to her lips as they curl over her teeth. Her incisors practically gleam in the darkness.

“Yelena, baby.”

Yelena’s hand lands on Kate’s throat, fingers trembling as they brush over her windpipe, tracing her Adam’s apple and squeezing ever so slightly into the muscle of the sides of her neck. Kate’s breath catches, her eyes wide. Yelena is looking right through her. The gun presses harder into her forehead, the pinch a dull echo through the haze of panic that’s starting to build.

Her girl is speaking now, the Russian thick and slurred, too fast for Kate to pick through and decipher. She’s begun to tremble, chest heaving and gun rattling in her grasp.

“Yelena.” Kate can feel something cold and horrible building in her stomach, underneath her skin. She slowly raises her hands so that Yelena can see them, and hazel eyes snap around, her lips pulling back further as the low snarl that hasn’t ceased for a moment in her throat only seems to grow. “Yelena. It’s me. It’s Kate.”

“Kate is dead.”

Kate feels her blood run cold, and she can’t stop her body from trembling. “What-”

“She’s dead.” Yelena has leaned closer, her hand tightening on Kate’s throat. She’s breathing hard, panting through her nose and between her teeth, and the look in her eyes has only deepened, shattering over her face. “She is dead.”

Her finger is twitching over the trigger, and Kate’s eyes dart over the firearm. The safety is off. The cold metal has cut through her skin, and she’s distantly aware of a thin trickle of blood seeping down her forehead.

The fear overpowers her will, and Kate reacts before she can think. Her hands dart for the gun, trying to push it up and away, her head pressing down into the pillow to get out of its aim.

Kate’s ears are ringing. Tears sting her eyes. The gun went off. The gun went off. Yelena shot it. Yelena shot her-

No, not her, she can still think. Her brain is still inside her skull. Her eyes are functioning in their sockets. There’s a throbbing in the side of her head, and the ringing has turned into a scream, but she’s mostly sure she’s not dead.

The shot seems to have woken Yelena fully, her mouth hanging open and eyes staring directly down at Kate. She seems to take it in all at once- her girlfriend, laying underneath her, pinned down by her weight. Her hand, wrapped much too tightly around Kate’s throat. The pistol that she keeps in her nightstand, pointed only inches away from Kate’s ear, and the bullet hole in the headboard, splintered wood jagged as it pokes out.

There’s a moment where the world completely stops, and for a moment, there’s nothing but Yelena and Kate, one breathing and one not, one scared and one horrified, both with tears on their cheeks and uncertainty on how to move forward in their chests.

Yelena is scrambling off of Kate and out of bed half a second later, the gun dropping to the blankets silently as she yanks the window open and disappears into the cold night. She has to get out. She has to get away. Far away, where she won’t almost kill the one thing she has left to love.

Kate doesn’t move to follow her. She lays there on her back, throat aching and head spinning as she sobs, and the fear only tightens its grip on her shaking body.

[just-a-repa]

This was their dynamic, me thinks

There is a lack of Dooku and Qui-Gon content, so I'll take it upon myself to try to fill that emptiness a lil bit