#so maybe that's why i want bangs
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I kinda want to get bangs
#should i do it?#am i nuts?#fyi i've been emotional and a bit depressed#so maybe that's why i want bangs#heh#moonstrider speaks#personal
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Flashback, warm nights.
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#Poorly Drawn MDZS#MDZS#Season 1#wei wuxian#lan wanji#jiang cheng#should I have a teen tag? for all the flashbacks? Maybe I'll add it later#Linking the song for its 80's vibes + flashback melancholy + I think its fun#We have finally arrived at the cloud recess flashback! Dramatic first meetings under the moonlight! A sword fight! acknowledgement of skill#Its like everything you see in a 'No Homo' martial arts story that makes you go 'hold on that's a little...'#except we rejoice; for these bitches do be nurturing plot relevant homoromantic tension#I have to give a shout out to 15 year old wwx for in all honesty he had no way of knowing who he was facing#on day *one* of cultivation Christian summer camp! talk about bad luck#ok some other notes: I wanted to give non mxy!wwx distinct features while still looking somewhat consistant#and i think im happy with it! Softer bangs + mole + different hair tie ain't much but it works for me#they'll soon all be in white with small accents so I gotta do what I can#What im not happy about is my paneling B*/ theres no excuse for why I went back to the bad 3 square format other than I was lazy#Sadly I do these in batches so my bad habits stick around for a little longer
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everyone hates crunch and everyone wants the new dragon age to have 4x the scope with 8x the quantum content
#I'm sorry this isn't fair. I know we lost half a decade to two reboots making cool concept art ideas too unfeasible to consider#it is more than fair to mourn it. it's just so entropic. trying to keep containing the unraveling worldstate of thedas over and over again#such a uniquely weird predicament. I think I am starting to feel antagonistic to this type of storytelling#like not fully but to a certain degree I can sense its catastrophic toxicity in the long run#but then again I am the stories-matter-over-lore guy so maybe I am simply blind to the value of it all#this ties back into my musing yesterday about authored vignettes being defanged by player choice even without this context#so like I am starting to lose the plot here for why do this at all. they either have to bethesda it now#and start telling local stories or whatever#or keep banging their heads against this geometrically progressing wall while losing larger and larger sizes of their audience#like with the mass effect trilogy it's kinda like. a double funnel. gets wider then narrows back down by the end#cause it's a finite context those quantum states serve and exist in. but then you want to tell more stories in that universe#and the lorebrained gymnastics inevitably kick in. and like what is this all for#I think I'm growing away from this a little haha I hate that realization lmao
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I am really tired of a situation rn.
#fe three houses#felix hugo fraldarius#me using felix on my angy days because he is my angersona? you bet!#anyway if you want to try to get someones money or something bc you hurt your own car banging into mine#can you try to be a bit more timely with it buddy come on you hit me on feb29 !#why am i getting your insurance company calling me today !#also i would like to point out i didnt do it and neither of us were hurt and i filed a claim with my own insurance comp#and also filed a police report bc he didnt even suggest calling the cops to the scene#so like yeah hey man maybe you and your insurance company can move a lil faster or smth#literally everything that happened the day of is - according to my dad - an intimidation tactic#i look like im 15 and he probably thinks he can take advantage of a new driver but ya know! tough luck!#im just really tired and stressed over multiple things not negative so getting this on top of it was like#bro .................... anyway my phone didnt pick up for some reason so i called back and then nothing got resolved#cause the person who actually called me wasnt around to connect the line to from the guy who answered#idk man just its a lot despite my v minimal energy#got a job interview on monday tho ! and then also next week is an eye exam#and you might be thinking isnt that a good thing to get your eyes checked? you are correct but i am horrified#there are two body parts that give me absolute anxiety and eyes are one of them#and i know my eye sight is declining and im just v anxious#its fine im going to be fine i just have to be anxious about it
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Half assed screens, but some of the glamours I might will use for Ieeha throughout the journey of Dawntrail!
#its funny cause im actually super nervous#in a way thats really similar to how i felt when heavenward dropped#im as prepared as i possibly can be i think for the way ieeha will look with the new graphics#while trying to remind myself to cling onto the hope of being able to mod him#maybe ill be positively surprised of how he looks but tbh i kinda doubt it with his key features being changed#but ill try to stay positive as much as possible at least#im sad that burnout + lack of PC made me miss out on so much of endwalker#i think thats why i dont feel ready for dawntrail yet... because i dont feel done with endwalker#but ill just do all the things im behind on after!!!!!!#ieeha de verral#ieeha#my screenshot#ffxiv glamour#also someone once pointed out i use the maid tights a lot#and they were right. but its still nowhere near how much i use the midan horn of healing#im serious its been the key feature of ALL of ieehas healer glams since...... when did midas drop? early 2016? since then#the field commanders gloves are my second most glamoured item most likely#especially since is for all classes.......#i want to use other headpieces but they either clip or arent visible under ieehas bangs#or they just look off#who knows what will happen in DT... maybe he'll find a new hairstyle or smth. he's had the same since like 2018#TIME SHALL TELL HEHE
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i cannot stand the aot fandom this is not a new take at all they are universally intolerable but oh my dayssss u are FORBIDDEN from making ANY take about the show it's actually insane to watch. 'aot is perfect' no show is perfect. 'tell me you didnt get the show 😂🫵' people have different opinions/interpretations about things. 'eren is a good guy they could never make me hate him' i think there's actually 4 seasons and two movies explicitely using him as a tool to show that no one is 'good' or 'evil' they are only trying to survive. hello. the fandom r all so far up aot's ass that they actually discredit its writing in the process and it would be laughable if it wasn't so frustrating
#bc aot IS insanely well written but no one talks about it???#like all they do is SAY how well written it is but no one is brave enough to give examples or meta bc SOMEONE will jump on it#declaring they've misinterpreted the Single Correct Way of watching the show and are dumb and a hater for saying such a thing#i remember posting about my initial aot watch on here and i did NOT like eren i thought he was whiney and annoying (he is <3)#and i thought aot was overhyped but ive since finished it at long last and omg. it is so fucking good#one of those shows that you need to watch ALL of it to truly get what's going on#and the conclusion of eren's character i am genuinely so obsessed with ill probs make a separate post just about him#bc i have really 180'd on eren and i can see now he IS well written. but not for any reason i can see anyone else talking about???#people are just banging on about he was right and justified and a saviour and tragic etc etc and while those things are important#and should be considered that also like. was not the point imo#the irony and tragedy of eren jaeger was that after all the 'i am special simply bc i was born into this world'#concluded with the revelation that actually he was not special. the rumbling happened because a normal boy got a hold of a great power#and he mishandled it. he was immature. he acted his age. he was just some teenage boy and he responded in kind#there was selfishness and silly whims and a quick temper. he was never this godlike figure he gets painted as#and i ADORE THAT TAKE. THAT IS SUCH AN ICE COLD CONCLUSION. EREN WAS NEVER SPECIAL - THAT'S THE POINT#and like countless times through history one selfish person with their hands on an insane amount of power and a conviction#that they are doing the right thing goes on to lead to a continuation of the cycle of war#like the end credits with the tree is genuinely HAUNTING. it never ended. eren KNEW the rumbling would be unnsuccessful#and would leave enough of their enemies alive that they'd eventually retaliate HE KNEW THAT and did it anyway#why? bc he just /wanted/ it. desperately and immaturely. and so the war turned over for another generation and another and#LIKE THAT IS SUCH A POIGNANT HAUNTING TAKE. I FR STARED AT THE BLACK SCREEN ONCE I FINISHED IT FOR 5 MINS IN HORRIFIED SILENCE#yes it's not his sole motivation but ultimately the crux of his character boils down to the fact he's just some kid#to the point even when he's explaining it to armin at the very end they SHOW HIM AS A KID. THAT IS THE REAL EREN#THAT ANGRY SCRAPPY CHILD WHO THOUGHT HE COULD BEAT THE WORLD INTO SUBMISSION#NOT A HERO NOT A GOD NOT A DEVIL - JUST A KID GIVEN A POWER HE NEVER SHOULD HAVE GOT HIS HANDS ON#but if u say all that some chucklefuck tells u to kys and that u just Didnt Get The Masterpiece Of Attack On Titan#but do u know what? maybe people disagree w me! maybe this is just my interpretation! guess who's NOT gonna have a hissy fit about it?#fandom is about DISCUSSION and i have never seen a fandom as fucking allergic to it than the aot fandom#like omdddddddddd have a day off man isayama isnt gonna suck you off#aot
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i wrote a ridiculously long post trying to explain my confusion in a clear way so that ppl wouldnt mistake my words for smth else but i'm sure nobody wants to read all that so. here's something of a summary (lol me when i can't write a summary bc i get too scared and end up rambling in a desperate attempt to be clear and not sound like im excusing despicable behaviour !!!)
i haven't rly encountered it except for a couple times so far and both those were nasties that i blocked, but i do feel like there might be an okay way to go about shipping w a character who is under 18 (i'm thinking... 15 at the lowest. 16-17 is more likely) if ur a new adult (18/19, maybe 20) and it's just OC-ifying the character a lot and having them grow up with you ? am i crazy bonkers and giving ppl too much benefit of the doubt or is there smth to be said for that. because i feel like there's a way to do it in a decent way but maybe i'm just oc-brained. i feel like someone who has their f/o grow up w them wouldn't look at their f/o's source and go "i'm dating that kid :)" i feel like it'd be more like "aww thats my f/o as a kid :')" in the same way u would think that if u looked at a family childhood photo album of your partner fdsjkl
"dandy thats awful suspicious, why do u care sm if u aren't secretly doing this yourself?" says my o.cd and paranoia. well, dear brain, the reason i care is bc i am insane and for some reason constantly come up with ways to worry about ppl who don't even necessarily exist. but i can't help but think "what if theres some teen out there who feels like they need to abandon their f/o as soon as they reach age of majority lest they be labelled the same thing as goddamn pedos and incest-lovers". like. idk. maybe im just making up a guy to be worried about. but i also do not rly love how quick to pull the trigger some ppl are. i understand why that happens bc there is... a nauseatingly large number of absolute freaks (derogatory) on the internet esp on this awful website but like... idk. i worry that if i think the thoughts i've written here then i'm basically as bad as the pedos.
also i do think 99.99% of the time normal ppl (ppl who aren't goddamn freaks about kids) are going to outgrow their teen f/o by the time they're 19 (18 is iffy bc thats a weird transitory age where ur not rly an adult but also not rly a teen anymore) unless (this is the 0.01%) they REALLY oc-ify them and i mean like... mould them into basically something else entirely. barely even recognizable as the source character anymore. that sort of thing.
i'm going to go eat something and then probably come back in 30ish minutes in a blind panic to delete this because i'll worry i've done smth horrible and have ruined any chance at connection with others here fdsjkl
#banging my head against a wall WHY DO YOU CAREEE DANDY WHY DO YOU CARE SO MUCH#BUT I WORRYYYY I WORRY I WORRY ABOUT PPL WHO MAY NOT EVEN EXIST#i don't think i've ever seen anyone do this in good-faith thus far so WHYYY DO I CARE. maybe everyone who does this are all creeps#but i just cannot stop thinking abt it. for that one person who might not even exist. i dont want them to get ex-communicated.#but also maybe theres no way to go about it in an okay way and i'm just making up like. random shit in my head that doesnt make sense.#I DONT KNOW. sorry i think i'm actually being insane rn and just bumbling around worrying over complete nonsense#dandy.cmd
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i can’t believe twitter is trying to convince me that jopper stans are “bad” bc they want to see their ship rawdog nasty in a shed in the middle of an apocalypse…
#mind you jopper is ship with 40 year olds in it#yeah i want to see this hags bang it out#and so do the actors of the ship#david has been hinting at a steamy scene in s5#and him and winona improvised their kiss so…#stranger things twt is a bunch of prude 13 year olds like maybe this show isn’t for you#AND the reason why everyone watchrd stranger things in the first place was bc of winona so#you will not make me feel nasty for wanting to see jopper FINALLY bang#also st5 is gonna be rated r so…tune out now middle schoolers!#stranger things#jopper#jim hopper#joyce byers
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Listen if you're gonna send me an ask about why I shouldn't interact with a person, can you at least do it off anon so I can request actual proof privately? I'm not replying to these since the only way to respond to them is publicly and I don't want to contribute to an unsubstantiated rumor about someone. That's not fair.
#Also I checked and I don't even follow them! So don't worry about me not interacting I've been doing a bang up job already#Maybe I did in the past because there were only like 4 of us in the Tr/ig/un tags at any given time#But I don't now so I have no clue how or why you dmed me about this random person I don't even follow#The only mention of them I can find on my blog via search (granted it's a gamble cuz search sucks but) is a tag on a gifset from 2014#I mean if you're browsing posts from 2014 on my blog all the more power to you I had good taste#But also I don't really know this person. I vaguely recognize the username but again. Only 4 of us at any given time for years#It just feels Weird.#If ur going thru the trouble of sending asks abt this person then put your own reputation on the line since you're trying to tank theirs#Like if you believe these accusations enough that ur willing to send asks to randos then u should be comfy putting your name behind them#I'm giving u the benefit of the doubt here anon#I want to believe ur heart is in the right place and u think ur helping#But being on anon with 0 proof is not helping your case at all#Cruddy rambles#Ask
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thinking about gentaro’s hat. rip to it for getting lost in hypmic’s early production hell lol
#this is vee speaking#still like the funniest gentaro trivia to me lmao that he was originally supposed to have a hat lmao#i wonder why they got rid of it lol#like that chuuya nui makes rounds occasionally and i see hypsters very incorrectly calling him ‘mabonui’#(⬅️ is wrong lmao and being salty)#chuuya and gentaro are nothing alike save for their crossing bangs#but surely some slight appearance similarities wouldn’t have influenced gentaro losing his hat along the way lmao#i kinda wanna say it was rei’s fault gentaro lost his hat lol like maybe gentaro had it first#and then once rei was conceptualised better they took gencha’s hat away to avoid drawing links to each other lmao#i am once again asking for a 2nd guidebook with concept art lmao#the little things that changed even after debut is so interesting like the way jakurai’s personal pronoun changed by the 1st battle season#probably because they wanted to have otome use it only and didn’t want early connections between them drawn lol#and like it’s still so funny kuukou existed by 2018 based on his bootleg appearance in rhyme anima lol who else existed by then?????#we know nemu yotsutsuji and rei did ofc but like????? what about sasara rosho jyushi and hitoya what was their existence status?????#i just wanna know what changed between early development to now lol maybe after everything is over (🤢) we’ll get to see the beginning lol#c: gencha
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****
Motherfucker, y'all got me writing again, what the fuck?
#nah it's cool#i just banged out 1200 words one night then made myself cry with my own writing the next night#good. great. awesome. love that for me.#i haven't written fic in 10 years#what the actual fucking fuck#also#i'm just out here trying to get to the one scene i wanted to write that started this whole mess but now there's fucking PLOT?#i'm 2900 words in and it's gonna take at least twice that long to get where i wanna go#maybe#if i'm lucky#and why does a bitch need to understand fake science from a fictional world?#fucking hell#i refuse to deal with reya and the holy war#i am not taking it that far#that entire prospect is fucking exhausting and many better writers than me have already gone there#i mean fuck i'm already worried that i've read so much WN fic that i'm subconsciously cribbing story elements#y'all do this for fun? on the regular?#props to the fic writers#i was already a fan but damn i had forgotten how hard this shit is#warrior nun#fanfic
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we dont talk enough about how close kaisoo’s birthdays are
theyre quite literally the fated pair 🥺
theres only a single day separating both of them on January 13th which means all kaisoo supporters have a set day to celebrate their cute relationship :’)
the only thing that would make it better is if they were born in the same year! but i will pretend its like that because kai is kyungsoo’s gift 😌
if i was an astrology nerd i swear i would have so much to say but im not into that so.. well ITS FATE OK. the universe said so!
ok im done but really it’s brushed over too much, what other kpop ship has the perfect middle date 🥺
#im feeling emotional because i went to a kai birthday cafe event today and they also had ksoo birthday things out#they gave out free photocards for both of them and the photocards matched each other#it was kai with flowers and ksoo with flowers#I WANTED TO CRY ... WHO WAS THE KAISOOISTS IN MY CITY WHO BLESSED ME#idk kaisoo day just makes me so happy#i love drawing art for both of them all week to celebrate their bdays#the other members i lowkey forget until the day comes lol#i actually have 2 friends whos birthdays surround mine so im the middle date lol#also my mom and cousins bdays are next to mine#maybe thats why i feel like this lol#just a little mini rant about birthdays im sorry if youre reading this#lol i wanted to end kaisoo week with a bang but im kind of not sure what more to say#i haev a bunch of pictures and vids of them but its not worth posting lol#i cant wait until ksoos bday party. a crumb is all i need#kaisoo#kaisoo day#kaisoo week#kyungsoo#kai#jongin#d.o#d.o.#kai day#kyungsoo day
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Very generic “”gothy” character in a children’s cartoon” type look just out of curiosity, seeing if I had enough stuff to put together a full outfit from a box of old clothes lol. I didn’t have an actual main shirt though, so it’s just a plain tank top with cat shape cut out of paper and safety pinned onto the front
#Though not calling anyone generic if this is your style or something. I don't mean it in a bad way. I just mean like.. all of the steretypic#al elements are there. The choker thing. the 'fishnet shirt under a tank top' . the 'carefully placed slightly askew studded belt' etc.#the skirt + some form of patterned specially striped tights + platform boots combo. etc. Like from a character design standpoint#These are the elements usually present in a show when they want to portray 'this caracter is slightly edgy and alternative'#just missing like.. hair with straight across bangs in pigtails that's black with a few colored streaks in it. OR just like shoulder length#shaggy hair that's also streaky and has a sidebang. and like.. one lip piercing or something ghhjbjh.. dark eyeliner#black nailpolish. I'm not painting my nails just for one uoutfit though. I actually used to wear nailpolish more but I just hate the smell#so much now. I can't see how I ever was able to bear it. I think maybe because usually I had some bigger spaces with ventalation. I guess#I could paint them outside maybe. Still#It's still hard to beleive some poeple will like. full on#get their nails done on a constant basis. get hair done. etc.etc. Not even just becuase of the money but like. the sensory experience seems#ovwerhelming. I only have been to a hair salon like twice in my life and both times I HATED a person touching me. and having to like lay my#head back and get it rinsed. etc. I went to a nail slon literally once because someone else wanted to go and I happened to be with them#and the smell was bad to me and also I did not like them touching me even if it was just my hands. Also I've never had fake nails#and didn't want them so when I went in I just got them plainly painted a plain color with nothing special andit's just like.. I could have#done that myself for free lol.. I get going to a place with special tools and equipment if you want something complicated but like..#why pay to have your plain nails plainly painted in a plain way#Hair thing if more bothersome though like. Maybe strangers can touch my hands i guess but like. letting someone near my head and face.#automatic bad reflex. Like an animal protecting it's belly or something. I think amplified by the fact that not only is a stranger touching#you but also there's like. so much. stuff. wet feeling on hair and then the feeling of hands and then so many smells and then other poeple#being there too. etc. etc. Though since my hair is so long now I have been curious every once in a while to like.. go into a place and get#an estimate. Not to go through with it actually but just like. hey if I theoretically wanted you to bleach my very dark extremely thick hai#r that is all the way to my fingertips. and make it like white.how much would that cost and how long would it take. I feel like it would tak#e froever and be very expensive since it'd probably use up a lot of product. I barely even keep up with coloring my own hair at home anymore#because it's always such a process. Instead of one thing of dye I need literally like 4 lol. etc.#Or maybe it'd be cheaper because they'd have bulk items instead of buying single package. But still. the man hours probably. cost of labor.#ANYWAY khjk... Another fun look just to be silly. Not really my style but it's all just playing dress up
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i need to stop forgetting things exist the fucking second they leave my field of vision. why is is impossible for two things to occupy my mind at once especially when im tired. like. i feel like a sim. i feel like actions are being canceled and i just. move on. and completely forget what i was doing moments before. i fucking hate it
#i feel like it’s getting worse too#like its always hasn’t been great but the past few weeks have been especially bad#why can’t i remember things!! why is my short term memory sucking ass!!!!!!#like if i don’t write/type things down i loose it#making me wanna rip my hair out what the fuck is going on!!!!!#gonna start playing those phone games that improve memory or whatever#it’s either that or going to my mom for an essential oil recommendation#i know it’s probably some undiagnosed shit but im also like. i can’t keep blaming whatever is wrong with my brain because its a problem with#/me/. ya know?? like. yeah it is something with my brain. obviously. but i need to take some sort of action to fix it. and i dont know what#that action is#besides the two options i said before#or carrying a fucking notebook around and writing down everything. which is stupid also and i know won’t last a week#problem is im gonna forget about any rule i come up with since as soon as im preoccupied with something else. i’ll forget the rule#i would need a hat with the reminder on paper tapped to the hat#so it’s always dangling in front of my eyes#i don’t know what else to do at this point!!!!#it’s making me so worried about going away for college. cause yeah i did really well at community. but if i have the deteriorating memory#of a goldfish who’s constantly banging its head against the glass. how am i gonna make it through university.#i love writing essays in the tags that no one will read <3#having a ball rn. a great time. not feeling like a waste of resources at all rn. feeling great.#if my mom doesn’t let me wear my earbuds tomorrow i think ill scream#anyways. gonna bake some blueberry lemon sweet rolls tomorrow#me rambling#i love being undiagnosed#but let’s be real#being diagnosed won’t give me anything other than more of an excuse#because i can’t go on meds with my current living situation#and i also don’t really want to go on meds because i don’t trust them#feeling silly i think ill actually post this one maybe someone has a suggestion for what to do#vent
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Heyyy just read through CETBWA and loved it all over again! No rush but any word on when there might be a chapter 21? 👀
hey!! thanks, i'm very glad you enjoyed it and continue to enjoy it, that makes me really happy ☺️
chap 21 is happening, just very slowly. i'm trying to focus on getting a fic out for the @/dpxdcbigbang before i get back into cetbwa properly, but i've been dabbling here and there. honestly probably won't happen until september tho lol sorry
#idk we might get it in august#i should have the month of july to work on it and it's already halfway done so maybe#idk we'll see#it might not happen - the big black dog has bit me hard and i have the biggest case of the morbs#i'm only still writing because of the lovely extension for the bang fic otherwise i would be screwed#we'll see we'll see idk#cetbwa#feel so guilty everytime i get an 'update? soon please now?' comment and like.... fuck#i'm so tired haha#it's happening i promise#i just need some time to screw my head on straight and get back in the groove#i have plans for the rest of the fic so it's definitely not abandoned - not many chapters left ahhh!!!!#scary thoughts#that might be another reason why it's taking a bit longer... i want to do the ending justice#but that's at least four or five chapters down the line#there's time... there's time#thank you for the ask and again i'm really glad you're enjoying it still#really did uplift me#thank you#did also cry a bit after getting this but that's just me rn lol#thanks again#i'm gonna try and write ig haha
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Bato/Sokka has been festering in my brain since I read it on your blog. I'm currently on "Bato doesn't even recognise Sokka first time they sleep together" brain. (Do you reckon Bato's the "can't believe you got me into this mess" hate sex type? lol)
Ohhh tell me more anon. Like Bato and Sokka end up in the same Earth Kingdom bar, and Sokka’s changed so much that Bato doesn't realize who he's hooked up with until morning?
Like Sokka goes away to study and train after the war and comes back home finally for some festival and there's no words exchanged, just dancing and flirtatious glances and touches and dragging each other to somewhere private?
Like Bato is so hung up on Hakoda that he sees Hakoda in everyone he sleeps with anyway, and it's not until the next morning that he truly gets a look at Sokka and realizes it wasn't just wishful thinking?
My question is -- does Sokka know? Or does he think Bato's a stranger too?
(I confess its hard for me to see Bato being the hate sex type when he was the one to fuck up. Too self-flagellating lol. Now riled up, frustrated sex becauae I'm not supposed to want you but I do and you're flirting all through this meeting isn't *helping* sex on the other hand...)
#asks and answers#Bato/Sokka#I am thinking Sokka knows its Bato the whole time purely because the whole realization the next morning gets even funnier#If Sokka is realizing nothing and wondering why Bato is suddenly acting so weird maybe he wants to bang again but is shy about it
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