#so ive heard type shit
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eepiest little man in the building
#HIS EARS ARE SO BIG HELP#so ive heard type shit#he has a habit of tilting his head back when he’s being petted like he fucking CONKS it back its so funny#we visited a cat cafe today I wanna go back again… there are so many of them#the room was really well maintained like we wore shoe covers and everything. and there’s a back room for the cats to go if they wanna#tap out so thats nice. BUT THIS LIL GUY. OHHHHH LIL MAN#he looks almost completely black but he seems to have these slightly darker stripes which are hard to see..??#THERES ALSO AN ENORMOUS MAINE COON NICKNAMED THE KING OF THE ROOM? HES HUGE JESUS CHRIST#made friends with a curious white and orange one who looked like he was thinking of pouncing down on me#and a very VERY pretty white and silver point with blue eyes who was happy to greet everyone#my brother was stuck on the floor bc a Persian that snubbed everyone else looked at him like ‘you. your lap is MINE’#and kept him there for 20 minutes. another cat wanted a turn but the Persian claimed him ;w;#my brother was popular with the cats bc they could probably sense he’s the calmest person in the room LOL#diary#yapping#cats#I wanna go back again sometime…
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an entire doodle page worth of content of just these two waow
art commissions
full page for you nerds
#🚬.dei.art#i can link my art comms on this on because i spent all day on this#just dance#just dance 4#jd4#rock lobster#rock lobster p1#rock lobster p2#art#fanart#digital art#procreate#doodle page#me changing up how i draw humans ONCE AGAIN#but tbh this time think its really cuties from how i stylized the eyes#anyways im unhealthy obsessed with this one map#if youre in kin palace you know what i mean#okay to explain why im calling p1 a ''fucking freak'' its because 1) she just fucking bites p2 2) come on have you heard the female vocals#on this song 3) yeah you gotta be a little weird to date a lobster#eerrmm small little headcannon time#i like to think while p2 is very flirtatious and cocky and all that stuff that comes with being a greaser and shit#when flirted back with hes a never mess and gets all flustered when shown affection :dandylien:#ALSO also i like to think the map was their first meeting it just like gives me that vibes at the first couple seconds of the map#and the first drawing in all of this is after that and p2 is a little shy bc oooohh fuck he really likes this chick and also she bit him#and then p1 kinda like bombards him with love or whatever and then the rest is history (they went missing since 2012)#i sound insane i just love these two a lot#oh also its hard to tell ingame but p1's bracelets match of colors of p2 and THATS SO CUTE 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 UUUUWWWWWWAAAAAA#i almost typed ''how come no one talks about this!!!1!'' like giiirrrl no one gaf about rock lobster#i should go to bed ive been on this draft for too long#morning edit: i thought i was cooking what am i talking about
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okay lol mini rant in the tags sorry i just HAD to get this off my chest 😭 sorry if this is very incoherent and poorly worded or structured or whatever i'm just. pretty out of it and i cannot really think to write this properly. well, that or i am probably just illiterate actually. Yeah that's it lol
#why are friendships so complicated#in my last year of senior high school at an all girls school#i transferred last year#and it's just cliques left and right#they all hate each other#i'm the type of person who can vibe with all of them even if their personalities are very very different#i am kind of friends with everyone in the sense that i can find common ground and have interact comfortably and enjoyably#my friend group from grade 11 (theyve been friends w each other for so long and i was the newcomer) dissolved this year bc things went down#i dont know the full extent of what happened#but those five friends split and three have merged with another group#the group that isolate my other two friends and seem to not like them#at least the “leader” of the group anyway. Not so sure about the rest#and now i am stuck in the middle lol. I have other friends from other groups but they have their own groups#the three girls already have each other and the new group (it's kind of a mix of me excluding myself on purpose and them not including me#in things presumably bc i am still “close” with my other two friends they don't like#it is a weird dynamic because me and the other group the three other girls merged with can vibe with each other#we can laugh with each other and enjoy each others company when theyre not talking shit (they rarely do it in front of ppl so i havent rlly#seen the full extent of it)#and also my two other friends are obviously closer to each other than with me since theyve been friends for way longer#i remember i had a conversation with one of my friends from the three girls that split away#it was something like i have to tell the class this and that etc since im the president#and i am not a very assertive person i am also very scared of being disliked. I told her i didn't want the class to hate me and she said#“everybody likes you you are friends with everyone”#it really doesn't feel that way. why do i feel like secretly they are talking shit#again i dont even know why we split up#but now i am just. Stuck in the middle#the thing is ive never even heard my other three friends talk shit and do nasty stuff with the new group/the main clique of the class#i havent seen the bad side to anything that i hear whispers about because ive never seen it#i havent been subjected to it either#i feel like i am wrong about a lot of things but i am just. blind or too deep into my people pleasing tendencies to not realize shit
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guess whos not going in at all this week, actually
#MY MANAGER EMAILED LIKE 2 HOURS B4 I HAD TO GO IN#she finally changed my schedule (1 day) to the night shift today#(i emailed her to be safe just kinda casually reaffirming im going in at the new time & then asking if any other shifts wanted 2 be changed#bcs that sounds great to me whstever option she goes with#she ignored that question & i get a new email from her asking if i completed a training. lets called it DOC#basically a long time ago she said 'i will send you DOC instructions soon' .. a few days pass and i get three 50 paged packets#one is called NAVIGATING DOC#im like oh ok cool that must be the DOC training shes talking abt bcs the other 2 packets were abt various trainings#NAH BRUH. APPARENTLY THE DAY IM SUPPOSED TO GO IN. SHE MESSAGES ME SOME ENTIRELY ALIEN PROGRAM#and is like 'u completed this right? cus if u didnt u cant come in today.'#LIKE?? MAYBE I WOULDA IF U SENT THE SHIT#but it's also like. dam i shouldve emailed prompting her to send what she said she would n clarifying BUT FUCK#WHY DO I GOTTA?? IM NOT THE MANAGER#she literally told me the name of the program rn thru email so i type it in and see like four hour long modules to complete#mind u i aint never even been informed a WHISPER abt this new program. nothings even labeled DOC TRAINING#but my struggle is. was i notified this?? and i just didnt see??? was i supposed to clarify with her what the DOC training was exactly??#the only thing ive heard abt doc training b4 this is 'i need to send u DOC training soon' in EMAIL. so i expected an alert#abt THE DOC TRAINING... in an EMAIL notification. WHAT THE HELL IS THIS#idk man#i dont even care bro like im busy as hell & the work is just to build clinic hours so i dont care abt the money factor#it's just like. can we get this first day jitters thing over with already?? im so over this bro#yaddayadda i emailed her an apology n ill be on that ASAP shit. but i did let her know i am basically justnnow seeing this site#n if there was any email or notif that couldve/tried to inform me of its existence 2 pls let me know / figure out how to find it#so the issue doesnt occur again & i dont have to keep botherinher which im so srry of bcs med is stress n shes just trying to get by#but still bro im a lil miffed bcs she probably thinks im stupid now and now im wondering if i AM#bcs WDYM ONLINE MODULES. AINT NOBODY SAID SH IT EVEN ABT THE EXISTENCE OF THEM!!! i wouldve pressed harder 4 clarification#if i knew it was an ONLINE MODULE i had to look out for on some randomass site i didnt even know the name of until now#instead of the EMAIL UVE BEEN 'COMMUNICATING' WITH ME ON#ARREGHHHHHHHH IM NOT STUPID. I SWEAR IM NOT STUPID FUCCK MY BAKA LIFE
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god why do all the playlists on spotify fucking suck when it comes to looking for something thats gonna trigger my fear response. i need to envision keisser jump scaring asher the second before they break out into the worlds most simultainiously complicated yet obvious metaphor for self hatred and struggle to break viscious cycles/struggle to remain in control of oneself while i sort through garbage
#everybodys is so quirky and like ehehee upbeat innapropriate songs for fight scenes ^_^ aha#or the lamest mainstream twenty one pilots type shit ive ever heard. where is the shit they put in horror movies#im not listening to a complete horror movie playlist either bc its got other songs in it that dont fit what im GOING FOR . pouts freakishly
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Oh yeah the band at the pride thing last night did Good Luck Babe which continues to baffle me like all these cool gay people are just dancing having fun to "you'd have to stop the world just to stop the feeling" a lyric which almost makes me cry whenever I hear it. Not clear what vibes I'm missing here
#id say the missing vibes was several more shots but andie was totally sober and still vibing hard#actually probably the missing vibe is not having the very specific type of dumbass emotional problems i do#wtv. obviously ive enjoyed ever chappell roan song ive heard so far and i think shes fun but also whats going on here#my shit
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it is always a little funny to me when people try to make psychologists and psychiatrists out to be the only people ever capable of being able to accurately diagnose mental illnesses and disorders and that their word is law as a way to criticize self diagnosis when like. once i was hospitalized and the psychiatrist there who i had not even known for more than a day tried to diagnose me as bipolar despite me having No history of mania because he.. couldn't really understand why i acted the way i did i guess???
#milgran't#tw hospital#tw psych ward#i just randomly remembered this (i say randomly as if i dont know exactly why im thinking about this stuff). dont mind me#tbh i should make a tag for like. more personal posts. but. idk what to make the tag name..#oh well#apologies for not being cool and collected and expressing things that show that im a human with emotions and needs recently#The Holidays are probably. one of the worst times of the year for me </3#its not even seasonal depression or whatever its just Oh Jesus Oh Fuck Oh God (gets hit by 99999 trauma bullets)#that psychiatrist sucked SOOOO fucking bad btw#trying to prematurely diagnose me as bipolar was one of the tamest things he did during my stay#i hate him i genuinely hope he dies <3#tbh i think he actually did. Break The Law with me. he probably couldve argued it was for the safety of others bc im crazy :3. but.#sometimes i just Remember That and im like. huh. hey what the fuck actually#but seriously. so many mental health professionals just make you sit there and go. .. how the FUCK did you get your license??????#ive heard some of The Most ''oh only people who are completely ignorant about mental health say this!'' type of shit from professionals#idk why im the one being labelled as insane when they think saying some of that shit is okay and professional MFKDLSFMDSf
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this is fine im not hyperfixating on fnaf...and its totally not turning into a special interest...anyways everybodys opinion on the timeline of fnaf is dumb and im the only right one/hj
#like im sorry but sweet baby evan is not the boy who snuck out in the midnight motorist#at this point hes like 5#hes not sneaking out and breaking windows and shit#the timeline is so fucking confusingggggggg#because in the books it says that charlie died in 1982 before the bite but why would william kill her back then he has no motive#unless he had a rivalry with henry or something#but the books are a different canon but they also arent?#i have been trying to figure this out like with how i piece together things and what i know but holy shit this is hard#like why in the world would you make a timeline this complicatedddddddddd#also when the fuck did elizabeth die?!#and where does sister location take place? ive heard theories that its under the afton house but that doesnt fully make sense to me#like its heavily implied that william hid in some sort of basement/room a lot to work on his shit but the entire thing of sister location?#im in so many fandoms that have the self proclaimed title of “most complex lore” but fnaf honestly takes the cake#anyways im very autistic about shit and i realize i have been typing for a while now and anyways#if you are also autism about fnaf i would love to hear your theories
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weighing the pros and cons in a fraction of a second of telling my new uni friend about my dead bat story bc best case scenario our friendship grows stronger with anecdotes and stuff but worst case he thinks im a weirdo :/
#the secret to making friends ive heard is to treat them like they're already your friend. a sorta fake it till you make it type of situation#the thing is all the irl ppl i consider my friend have been for at least 10 years so perspectives might be skewed#tani's personal shit#i did tell him w/o much detail but its alright 👍 a win for friendship!
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i feel equally fascinated by older people and homes that arent like hoarders level but covered in a layer of dust and grime that feels like its existed since the dawn of time and also by brand new sparkling clean well maintained homes, though the latter with more of an air of confusion and alienation. like thats what the conceptual "normal world" thinks every house should look like but theres so much of the former going on that just isn't like ... acknowledged
#its also interesting bc when youre online all the time and feel like youve seen and know about every Type Of Guy out there#you remember theres so much going on in the world that isnt connected to whatever web of influence youre tapped into#and i wouldnt even say 'not online' or whatever like theres 70 yr olds still writing diatribes on fb about their life!#fuck even my irl friends who are also extremely online trans leftists around my age will be in on like#memes and shit that ive never heard of in my life#but that info is still potentially accessible!!! its not hidden or secret from me at the same time!!!#the irony poisoned and the sincere live in different worlds but walk the same earth....#life is so big and crazy#idk im just having Many Thoughts rn
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linebeck’s type is men who could easily snap him in half like a toothpick but choose not to
#salty talks#bonus headcanon cuz im thinking abt linebeck being gay#tbh the bar for ‘men who can snap him in half’ is low bc i dont imagine thats too hard to pull off#its not even ‘scary guys’ tho that easily works for him too he just really has a thing for strong men#he happens to meet zuaz while link is chilling on the island and is immediately down bad for this blacksmith hes never heard of before#linebeck#yeah sure ill tag this normally.#bro im just saying shit. but also the three romantic interests ive given him in aus are all v physically strong men#its generally fun to ship linebeck with men but that is my hc for his general type so. idk bye
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Thinking abt Him again (Wendy Carter)
#rat rambles#missing my favoritest carter atm. and also wendy ig#I am sad that wendy skill tree drop isnt by webber's side but at least abby gets to be skill tree bros with Her bestie 😌#I still haven't looked at wendy's skilltree because god I am afraid why has it been taking this long wendy abby what did you two do#I will keep procrastinating tho because even tho my standards aren't technically all that high I still feel like they're too high#wendy has like 4 game mechanics and I ideally would want his skill tree to stay focused more on those things#Ive heard that wendy's skill tree lets him do some stuff as a ghost and thats. neat I guess. but its not what Im looking for.#I Really don't think Wendy needs whole new types of mechanics I just want stuff to make sisterns both good and interesting some stuff for#abby to make her more fun to fight stronger enemies with and some new elixers#and tbh. I dont like the idea of wendy himself doing cool ghost stuff. if anything Id rather he be able to buff other dead players#I just think a vital part of wendy's kit to me is that without abby hes just a less shitty wes#but the problem with that is that it means that for like 90% of the bosses (it Im being generous) you are fighting as a less shitty wes#and could fuck around with the idea of wendy expanding from being an abby specific support unit to a more general support unit#now ofc this would have drawbacks and be hard to implement well but y'know.#I also just dont like the idea of too many non abby ghost perks in general as I think it would just add needless bloat#which tbf is like what half of every skill tree is so idk what I expected#some characters rly do need the extra mechanics due to very nothing burger base kits but I really don't think wendy needs that much#again the tools for giving wendy and abby cool flashy shit or more practical stuff are already present#so yeah idk if Ill like his skill tree much. which is why Ive been avoiding looking at it like the plague ever since it was announced#I try not to be too bitchy abt skill trees even tho I've basically never liked them since most of the time they're inoffensive#but this is my boy so I will be a big baby about his skill tree being mid no matter what they put on it lol#I hope walter and wortox mains are having fun at least they both need the reworks badly#now for walter I dont trust that a skill tree will be what he needs but wortox can work with this I think#just above all else god I hope webber's skilltree is good whenever klei decides to release webber from their basement#poor boy needs the buffs so bad he has been painfully outclassed in every regard for years
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I am the master of the brown jacket (i own two)
(soon to be 3 plus a brown linen shirt) (the first two were supposed to be for sewing patches onto but I suffer from liking them too much as is and also fear of commitment)
#i PROMISE the new one will get patches. eventually#also i have a transfusion exam tomorrkw that i have been nervous about since i first heard about it a YEAR AGO#i have to get 100% on the practical part otherwise i fail the whole subject#(its blood typing. if we get it wrong people die so its understandable)#but funnily enough its now the theory thats stressing me#bc i thought it would be basic shit#but ive now found study questions that she didnt tell us about#and theyre Very theoretical and in depth#and its unclear if we need it for tomorrows exam or if its for the final#so now i have to get up early to revise THAT shit as well#and i havent even finished my original revision i HATE IT HERE#lauratexts2024
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How was the meal Shadow
#ngl this post madw my imagination spiral so hard that ive unlocked the horror concept of#sonic repeadively murdering shadow with no reprocussion after the event sof kidnapping him and forcing him to literally eat the entire#script of his words starting from that exact line- from every media- frpm every game that Sonic wouldve heard him talk#and then was like “lets escelate” and eventually it becomes rei akemi type shit where its just like his subconciois is linked to every#murdered version of him but he represses it so badly/memory is so fuzzy that he just has no idea whu he absolutely HATES/wants to avoid#sonic like the plauge. and its like sonic has escaped the boundraies of the limited mindscape of fiction and has mentally ascended beyond#the fourth wall. and now he is just like “well hes the least likely for people to question what im doing with him or why i keep fighting#this guy so might as well see how far i can take this cause even of he dies hell jusy come back. same way i do. everytime.“#and like sonic is like “this is wjat happens to us when the people from the othee aide of the screen make us popular” and does that one#scene in neon evangellion where its just a bunch of float rei akemis copies#and its like kind of a horror concept considering sonic was brealing the 4th wall since his original debut#with the whole “killing hself causs he got bored of waiting for you to come back to the screen” thing#but im guessing since he dont do that no mo hes gotta have someone else to play with#and thats why shadow hates sonic
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if i do the last push of soldering today the hardware of my keyboard is gonna be done and THEN you all can see a really weird keyboard
#it still has a numrow. im not an animal. im making it with my flares of really bad hand and wrist pain in mind and thats why its weird#my right hand is completelt fucked at trying to use a normal keyboard ive literally adopted a like 60° typing stance and i spacebar with my#pointer finger. so it was like. AT MINIMUM i want to be having a better time than this#actually recently like one of the singular reasons ive been motivated to keep working is because i can have a numpad layer with a backspace#next to it i fucking hate using the numpad and even having an enter key and not a backspace. its almost patronizing#anyway. its kind of ergodoxy. like not really but anything closer is weird indie shit nobodys heard of
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