#so itll come around later
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Juno was mad, he knew he'd been had So he shot at the Sun with a gun
The Heartless Juno Incident! The first in a string of incidents that starts off this AU! I was planning to release a fic with the artwork buuuuuuuuuut its not mentally working so have the art first :3
Heart painted the gun to look like a nerf gun before he used it, with the idea of "if you think I'm childish, I will use a childish weapon to defeat you". He missed, thankfully, although not by much, and broke their fragile balance. (and hush about the poor gun handling that's the point)
Mind is fine btw, just incredibly angry that he had been shot at by his sibling.
#cccc#cccc au#chonnys charming chaos compendium#Heartless AU#Heartless timeline#Heartless story#THE INCITING INCIDENT OF THIS AU#sorta#more like the first in a line of them#BUT it is one of the last cccc canon event in this au before everything swerves off the tracks#Heartless stuff#rand.art#rip the accompanying fic but its actually pretty difficult to write whoops#so itll come around later
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was gonna say smth else but this turned into a vent sorry everyone just ignore. typical weekend post on this blog u know how it is here we go👍
#wild ik so many ppl getting married meanwhile im over here struggling to convince myself my friends even care abt me or want me around#pathetic to admit but i cant even fantasise abt someone loving me bc im too insecure n emotionally unstable#my mind just shoots the idea down like whoa. unrealistic. ur incapable of expressing or receiving affection in any way that matters#no matter how badly u want to... and even if someone did well u wouldnt believe them most of the time#gotta get out of the fucking labyrinth first i couldnt inflict this shit on anyone i cared abt#but it makes me so desperately sad sometimes i dont know how im ever going to get out of this ive been trying for years and years#and im a little better at it snd i dont feel like this all of the time i know it just comes around and itll pass again#but im tired of being in so much emotional pain so frequently. and shouldering it so alone. theres such a disconnect between myself and#others and i dont know how to bridge that i don't know how to stop feeling so isolated and unwanted !!!!!! im trying so hard#it doesnt even bother me w relative strangers in my life like i dont get insecure at all around them i like meeting new ppl#bc theres like. no expectations i guess. like ik they dont care abt me personally and idk them well enough to do that either#and its fun but it doesnt satisfy needs that i have like i need to feel close + connected to ppl i need to care abt them + feel cared for#but as soon as i do start to care abt ppl it gets all tangled and i end up getting rly badly hurt over and over. thru no fault but my own#bc im constantly alienating myself and bc i struggle so much w shit like physical affection which is frustratingly rly critical for me!!!!#it wouldnt fucking matter if i didnt like or want affection ik some ppl are fine without i wish it worked like that for me#but nope instead i have to be constantly messed up over my complete fucking inability to express myself in any form#and ik it makes everyone around me so uncomfortable so it just becomes self reinforcing and eventually they drift and leave me behind#and i just do that over and over and over and every time ill tell myself ill do better ill try harder and itll get easier and someone will#and it happens again and right now im at the stage where the abandonment fear is starting to kick in which is awful n paralysing#and usually a precursor to actually being abandoned ehich is always my own fault bc i start behaving so erratically out of fear or defense#its self fulfilling and im trying. im trying so hard not to let it overwhelm me again and not to start acting out and freaking ppl out#and im coping with it okay i think but just hurts me a lot its all internal my rejection sensitivity is gradually ticking up and up#and argh!!!!!!!!! and some days im okay and some days its like this and i dont know what todo when its like this im so tired and in pain#its not even that bad today tbf. once im done typing this to get it out ill be able to do smth else and distract mysrlf for a bit#and then calling friends later too so exposure therapy innit. but itll be fun and i love them but i will probably also feel very bad after#or even possibly during but thats okay ill still manage fine im not going to let it interfere i dont want it controlling my fucking life#i am going to have a nice time and be okay despite it all. even if i do have to fucking battle this every day forever#and even if it stops me living my life to the extent i want and feeling as ok as i want i just have to come to terms with and be ok w it#and im not going to be!!! a fucking asshole abt it!!! i dont want to hurt anyone else thats the most important thing no matter how i feel#thr rest is all secondary and ik i cant help a few little bumps here and there but trying hardest to keep it separate its not negotiable
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ok i survived yom kippur. but it took every single scrap of strength in my body and i’m not completely better yet
#purrs#food#ask to tag#got my period thursday… bad cramps friday and saturday to the point where i had to go home early saturday (we were working lol 🤪)…. woke up#sunday with a. headache that got worse and worse throughout the day… 5-6 hours into the fast was in agony and felt like i was going to ****#so i… broke the fast and ate something at like 1am. then woke up in agony at 5am and then again at 9am and had a breakdown / fight with my#mom and then spend the whole rest of the fast deathly nauseous and my head hurting worse than ever. broke the fast an hour before everyone#else did (only ate a tiny bit) and then during the fast breaking dinner i started freaking out bc eating wasn’t making my head hurt less so#my grandpa told me to go lie down with a heating pad on my head and i did and slept for like 2 hours and it helped. finally feel better but#my head still hurts faintly and im scared it’ll come back. also i didn’t do my homework and missed class today to fast so im fucked#ive had headaches like this before but this is the worst one in a LONG time. it wasn’t a migraine bc those are in one specific spot iirc but#this was like… my ENTIRE face and the source of the pain migrated from my jaw to my temple to the bridge of my nose to the back of my head#etc etc and it kept moving around and was so sharp i didn’t even have the strength to open my eyes or walk around. and i think it was making#me interpret hunger as nausea. also i took my temperature bc i was flashing hot and cold and was like 2 degrees under normal body temp and#felt so weak and shaky and had body aches too. lol 😍 hpefully the worst of it is over but my head still hurts a little and im so scared itll#happen again. that was by far my worst fasting experience ever#delete later
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after a break i finally got back to drawing oc batches :) i have 2/8 for my next set done... yaaaaayyy
#i hope i can finish them all by this time next week but id be being generous!#still i managed to get 2 done in 2 days....!#but i have plans this weekend so i wont get to the third one until later#and then the kids on weekdays so. we will seeeee#its the owl feather batch btw. they won the last poll LOL#cobalt heart will have to come after#then ill probably do the two royals? i need to get around to them. andy's parents#followed by the scouts!#then some misc characters probably posted on their own#and for the last big batch itll be the tartarus crew#then a smaller batch for some parents and stuff#then probably arion#aaaaaaaand atlas will be the last one. just him. because hes sooo special#saving the most fucked up guy for last lol#overall progress 93/134. it will be 99 when this set is done!#ohhh maybe i should move up one of the characters to post as a single. for the 100th#maybe#anyway im rambling but this helps me plan stuff out. tumblr dot com is my rubber duck
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mmmm
i wanna go to the church next to my house but theres three people there and im scared of having to talk to anyone
#mystuff#inside smells so good tho#and its so chill#autism haven ngl#ill come around later maybe itll be alone#I dont believe either its just nice to be there
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me when im normal
#yes this is upside down. not to ummm overshare but im going through and analyzing all my actions and behavior this past year#to point out periods of hypomania. of which i have a few in mind. but anyway. going through various accounts i post on + related stuff#and my shitty memory to piece it all togeyher.#cause i got back from the doctors an she is p sure im bipolar. def depressed. but needs to see a psychiatrist for a proper diagnosis#cause if i get put on antidepressants and not mood stablizers and i AM bipolar then itll b very bad#but i struggle identifying mania periods. cause i only really get hypomania. the depression is worse. so im jogging my memory and gonna show#this later. to help them idk#SORRY this is probably tmi but also mourning the amount of spur of the moment vent posts ive deleyed bc this is essentially my diary and one#true tracker for my moods…this and a few other accounts lol#i just hope when i get put on meds ill finally be normal. i still have to go to therapy for various things but the mood swings are the only#thing rlly fucking up my life for the worst and i really truly want it OVER !!!!!#and if it comes around and im still not normal im killing myself <- dead serious. if it doesnt get better whats the point.#i truly cannot live like this.#anywayyyyy ^_^ going to listen to music and then sleep nowwww
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Laying in bed feeling depressed
#maybe I'm wrong but i think ive been more depressed since i started as floral specialist at work than i had been before. idk.#like my memory doesnt function right so idk for sure- anything older than x but newer than y is like *poof*#but uh i feel like ive been more stressed#well ok actually its been since i started trying to go for supervisor. that was the move that started the increased stress and that led to#floral specialist and now I'm here#struggling with depression. i dont want to go to the botanical garden w ma later but i also dont Not want to#bc the idea of going doesnt fill me w excitement/joy. like theres nothing but depression going 'but youve been there 100 times. nothing new#but the idea of not going does make me Unhappy. bc itll be 5pm and I'll be sitting around doing nothing and regretting not going#and making that bad mood everyone else's problem#but like i want to do all these other things today#i also wish i hadnt broken my bike and then insisted it was not worth fixing bc i would Love to go for a bikeride and I don't have a#working bike to use#I'm stressed abt this wk at work bc mday biggest floral holiday and im anxious its going to be a mess#and also I'm most likely gonna get my period during this coming wk. which is Fantastic /s#my parents have been talking abt maybe as early as next year or a couple years my dad retiring and them moving somewhere warmer#but i meant to be in a better position mentally and like. I'm terms of being able to take care of myself and do things on my own or at all!#I'm not ready and I'll be 30 next feb and I dont feel it. i feel like i did 5 years ago it doesnt feel like 5 yrs have passed at all#well 4 yrs rn#I'm anxious and depressed and i need to learn to drive and make doctors appointments and pay my bills#my dad still gives me my humira shot half the time and i dont entirely trust myself w it on my own without him or someone else around#at least. i can do it but i don't want to have to#i think they dont see how much support i actually need. like everyone thinks I'm low-support-needs autist and thats very clearly not true!#but since i live w my parents no one notices#i need some support. not a ton. but i need someone i can rely on to remember important things. someone i can rely on to help me w my humira#someone who will make meals when i cant. and remind me of when stuff is due. and someone to support me when I'm sick.#and someone to talk to. someone else to feed my pet half of their meals. so i can have a pet at all.#i need someone to interact with who lives w me or is around frequently at least#and its not going to happen#and im just. i either have to follow them wherever they go - which is not a good idea#i refuse to go to certain states bc of fascistic leadership and queerphobic and misogynistic laws
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Has anyone else ever thought about curses and kink? Not just someone being cursed and then discovering a new kink, but someone having a kink and purposely trying to get cursed in a way that fulfills that kink?
Like for example, witch gf has to leave on a business trip for a weekend, but she knows her bf will be so lonely without her. Knowing her bf has a pregnancy kink, as a kinky little parting gift, she curses him so that every time he masturbates the more pregnant he gets (with what? Guess itll be a surprise). She leaves with a wink and tells him she expects to see a sweet little baby bump by the time she gets back. When she gets back 3 days later, he's already cummed himself senseless, all the way to laboring and crowning around the head of a big demon spawn. Overstimulated and whining, he's still doing his best to touch himself. Because the spawn is partially born already, the curse doesn't just grow the spawn spreading his legs, it instead creates a sibling for his leaving occupant. As she walks into their bedroom, he cums again, and she can see his belly visibly start to swell again. The witch puts down her suitcase and wonders if she can get her slutty bf to cum enough that the 2nd spawn gets big enough to be born once her bf is done cumming out it's sibling.
Or you're single, and happy that way, but still looking to get a good spanking and its so hard to find someone to do it right. Too impatient to go through the human interaction and negotiation, you go to a witch and get a custom curse. Anytime you do some inane, mildly bad habit, you get a solid SMACK! across your backside. Let's say it's something you're more likely to do at home than out in public, or a certain phrase or gesture you tell the witch you're trying not to say or do. The more you do it the more the curse evolves, changing up the position and force of each slap. Sometimes you swear you can feel the metaphysical hand lingering, as if admiring it's own work. Instead of dissuading you from doing this 'habit' the activation thing genuinely becomes a habit of yours. Once it happens accidentally in public, you realize you might have a new, but still related, kink.
A man has always secretly dreamed of becoming a hucow, and after getting tired of his draining soulless business career, he finally decided to make it a reality. They make fake social media accounts and reach out to a curse creator. He pretends he's someone else who hates him, who wants to see him suffer and be humiliated. He DMs them a whole rant about how he needs to be taken down a few pegs, how he's awful and absolutely deserves this horrible curse to change him for the rest of his life. The curse creator absolutely agrees to help, even providing him a discount out of sympathy for his fake story. Since he knows it's coming, he feels when the curse hits. It's not long until people around him start to comment on how ditsy he's been lately, how much weight he's gaining, how his voice sounds 'different.'
Eventually, he tearfully admits to his friends and family that he thinks someone's cursed him! How could he possibly know who? And no one's come forward to gloat, who could possibly hate him so much to curse him like this? His loved ones look on in sad, if slightly condescending, empathy. It's not his fault he can't keep a thought straight in his stupid little cow brain, or that he keeps getting distracted by the growing teats bouncing on his chest, or that half the time he tries to form a complete sentence he can't help but moo a little! Eventually, when he's almost unrecognizable from the person he was, a family member suggests maybe joining a farm? They have a friend who's just bought one, and they're trying to get started, besides wouldn't it be so much better to be able to roam around a farm, rather than be cramped in his city apartment?
The moment he arrives at the farm and catches sight of the big minotaur running the place, he can't help but bat his long beautiful eyelashes and let out a visceral, lowing heated moo. When the curse creator reaches out to ask them to leave a review, he rates them 5 stars. Then immediately forgets what he was doing as he rubs his hyper-sensitive gravid belly, full to bursting with the minotaur's babies already, which is miraculously dwarfed by his massive udders, hooked up to the strongest milk pump his beloved farmer could find.
#i guess technically these could all be considered just 'spells' but because they're things general society might think is a bad consequence#they would be considered to be curses instead of just classified as a spell or magical effect#mpreg#my ramblings#nbpreg
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- dissappeared -
- summary: y/n gets her first tattoo ever and shes lucky enough to have nicolas sturniolo as her tattooist, she comes in for a bunch more over the next week and they become best friends, what happens when y/n drops off the face of the earth 2 weeks later?
warnings: angst, tattoos, abusive dad, hospital, suicide, swearing, idk lmk if i missed anything
nick sturniolo x platonic! reader based in: LA, California
y/n 19 madi 19
chris 20 matt 20 nick 20
delilah "del" (22) cassidy "cass" (21) veronica "vee" (20)
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=Y/N POV= -saturday-
im going out with my friends later for a well-needed girls night, we haven't gone out in so long due to us all being busy with work and our personal lives. i turn to my phone switching it on to see the time is 5:17pm and we are meeting at in n out at 7 to eat before we go to the club. i jump from my bed heading to the bathroom. i quickly undress, hopping into shower. once ive finished i step out and head to my closet to choose my outfit, picking through my hung up clothes i remember i bought a cute new outfit the other day when i went shopping with my sister, Nicola, i bend down picking up the shopping bag, turning placing it on my bed laying it out. i smile looking at it before putting it on. i step back facing the mirror, examining how it looks on me happily. i pick up my phone again to check the time and its 6:14 "oh shit" i mumble, swiftly sitting down at my desk grabbing my hair dryer out my drawer plugging it in. it takes around 25 minutes to fully dry my hair, messily section my hair and straighten it, leaving me 20ish minutes to do my makeup and leave.
-7:19pm-
since we're all drinking tonight we all had to walk or uber to the in n out, me living a 10 minutes away i walked there, leaving me to be a little late but when am i not so its fine. walking through the doors i see Delilah and Cassidy on one side of the booth and veronica on the other facing me, i run over to them "heyyyy" i smile sliding in next to vee, she side hugs me as del greets "hey baby", "took your time girl" cass laughs "you cant rush all this" i say as i push the hair from on of my shoulders. the waitress walks over and speaks as she looks up from her notepad "hi what can i get y'all?"
we all order and while we wait for our food to arrive we catch up on our lives. "so i have big news" vee starts, we all look to her "ur not preggo are you?" del jokes, vee shakes her head "no god no, not that i know of anyways" she laughs, "im moving to new York for fashion school" vee reveals, "OHMYGOD VEE THAT SO COOL" i squeal bringing her into a tight hug "im so proud of you vee" cass says as she and del reach over the table to join the hug "that's huge vee" del says in the hug". as we sit down vee carefully wipes her teary ears cautious to not ruin her makeup, "aw vee dont cry lovely" del rubs the back of her hand, "i just didn't expect you guys to be so happy about it, im moving so far" she sniffles, "of course we'd be happy for you vee" cass smiles "we're obviously gonna miss you so fucking much but we want you to be able to follow your dreams and if that means moving a mission away, we'll support you the whole way through it" i reassure her. "thank you guys, i love you so much" "we love you more girl".
-8:30pm-
we all finished our food and were walking to the new nightclub that had opened last month, we would've gone closer to opening but we couldn't get a date where we were all free. as we walk up the street we see a line leading out "oh my fuck look how long that line is" cass points in the direction we're walking, "youre joking" del shakes her head, "what the fuckkk" i drag out bringing my palm to each side of my head, vee just laughs "cmon guys im sure itll go down quick it opens at quarter to so we should be waiting like 5 minutes" she says.
vee was right, we waited for around 7 minutes before getting in. as we walked in we looked around in shock the place looked so cool, we all quickly made our way to the bar ordering our first drink of the night, i obviously ordered my favourite drink to ever exist, tequila sunrise, i worship the person who made these cause oh my god they are so good.
-12:49am-
i walk over to the bar to order another drink, no clue how many ive had already, we lost count a while ago. i reach the bar leaning my arms on the surface as the brunette women walks over to me, "hiya gorgeous, what can i get for ya?" she smiles i think for a minute, "urmmm i want to try something new, have you got anything sweet?" i ask looking at her big brown eyes "how about a margarita?" she tilts her head slightly to the side, "sounds great" i smile sliding my card towards her, "dont worry about it lovely, its on the house" she says turning around to start making the drink, "wow thank you so much" i smile looking down putting the card back in my purse.
-1:03am-
we left the club now, as we were all so drunk we were stumbling over each other as we walk, planning to go back to my apartment as its the closest. laughing loudly walking down the street cass notices something "guys guys omg" she speaks loudly over our laughs tapping our arms, "look we so should get matching tattoos" she points towards a lit building down the street, "FUCK YES LETS GO" i yell holding onto dels arms almost tripping us both over, "fuck it why not" del says, we all look to vee who is nodding "one thousand percent yes, cmon lets go" she says. we run down to the shop, i look in the window to see if theres anyone in there and theres a brunette boy sat at the front desk with his feet up scrolling on his phone, i open the door peeking my head through, "hey are you guys open?" i ask, he looks up in surprise "hi yes we are" he says with a smile, i walk in waving in del, vee and cass. "my names chris, how can i help?" he asks, "im y/n, that's vee, that's cass and that's del" i say pointing to each of us, i hope he doesn't notice how drunk we are and doesn't kick us out, "nice to meet you" he looks between me and the girls giggling behind me, "we want to get matching tattoos" i stated, "sounds great, i dont want to be rude but you guys seem quite drunk are you sure you want to do this?" he looks down to his computer before looking up again "tattoos are permanent" he adds, "we've been best friends since high school so im sure we'll be fine" del replied from behind me, he chuckles looking down grabbing paper on clipboards "here fill these in and once you bring them back we can get started" he said sitting back down, we thank him and go sit down on the couches by the window opposite him.
we fill out the forms and decide on getting four stars along the side of our wrists, we all walk back over to chris handing over our clipboards, "looks great, follow me and we can get started" he says walking out from the desk through the door next to it. "okay first clipboard is cassidy, cassidy this is madi, shes great, here you go mads" he passes Cass's clipboard to her, "good luck cass" me, vee, and del says as we continue to follow chris through a curtain separating the stations, "second clipboard is veronica, this is matt, hes quiet but one of our best, here" he passes vee's clipboard over and continues walking, "alright this is my station" he looks down at the clipboard "Delilah looks like youre with me" he looks back up, "make yourself comfy ill be right back" he places her clipboard on the table behind his chair, turning to me "okay y/n youre with nick, he is our best, trust me, i haven't got any yet but when i do im 100% going to him" he chuckles a little, i smile and nod following him, almost tripping over my feet.
"yo nick" he says turning to see the blonde boy asleep "oh my god wake up duffus" he says gently hitting the clipboard on his head "dude what" nick grumbles, opening his eyes a little then they immediately widen seeing me stood there "oh hey sorry" "its all good" i giggle slightly, "nick this is y/n shes getting matching tattoos with her friends, heres her clipboard" "thanks" nick nods taking the clipboard from chris's hands, he then walks through the curtain back to his station. "hey im nick" he smiles putting out his hand, i reach to take it forgetting to move my feet resulting in my stumbling over, hands pressed against the chair inbetween us "omg are you okay" he asks standing to help me up, "im okay just a bit drunk" i laugh covering my face in embarrassment. he chuckles sitting back in his chair after helping me carefully sit in my seat. "so it says here you want four stars along your wrist" he asks looking at the clipboard to his side, i nod "yea, one star for each of us" i confirm, "that's so cute, me and matt have matching tattoos on our arm" he says lifting his sleeve to reveal a cowgirl on his upper arm "i have this cowgirl, and he has a cowboy skeleton" he explains lowering his sleeve "i love that" i say looking back to his face from his arm, "have you gotten a tattoo done before?" nick asks sorting out everything he needs, "uh no, no i havent" i shake my head laughing a little looking down at my hands in my lap, "woah no shit? well its my pleasure to be your first" he jokes, i laugh looking back at him, "what about your friends, is it their firsts too" he questions, "no they all started getting them as soon as they could" i chuckle "del has 6 to 7, Cassidy has 4 and vee has 1" i add "how come you didn't get any?" he looks over to me "just never had the chance to i guess" i shrug.
-2:42am-
"i cant believe i like it so much thank you so much nick" i say, giving him a hug from my chair. "of course, it looks awesome im happy you like it" nick says hugging me back. after wrapping the tattoo, he goes through the aftercare instructions with me, but also puts a leaflet with all the information in my purse so i have something to go back on. we walk out to the main room where del, vee, cass, madi, chris and matt are talking between each other, "theres our baby" del says walking over to me wrapping her arms around me neck, "hi del" i wrap my arms around her back as we swing side to side a little squeezing one another. "del youre gonna squeeze her to death" vee laughs from the couch, everyone joining in laughing, del back up a little "sorry baby, how was it?" she asks lifting my hand, turning it to see the wrapped tattoo "it was okay, me and nick talked to whole way through it so i was distracted basically the whole time" "that's great, are you thinking of getting more?" Cassidy adds, del moves back to the couch pulling me to sit next to her, "yea i actually am" i proclaimed looking back to nick who was sat on the reception chair pulled around to us. we all talk for like half hour before they close up shop and we all head home, the girls coming back to mine.
-3 days later-Tuesday-3pm-
im currently walking back to the tattoo shop, i booked another tattoo with nick the next day of getting my stars. as i approach the shop i see a convenience store next door so i run in there and buy 2 bottles of water before returning, walking in chris sees me "hey y/n hows ur stars?" "theyre good chris thank you, i um booked a tattoo with nick" i smile standing the other side of his desk, "yup nick told me, ive got your details from last time so youre all good to go through" he nods up to me, "thanks chris" i say before walking through the curtain, madi wasn't in today maybe she doesn't work weekdays, walking through the next curtain i see matt scrolling on his phone, he nods to me and i nod back before walking through chris's station to nick's. "y/nn heyy" nick says getting up from his chair, greeting me with a hug, "hey nick" i say hugging him back. "nice to see you sober this time" he laughs "yea definitely" i laugh with him, "oh i brang you a water" i remember reaching into my bag grabbing both waters, handing him one "thankyou omg you didn't have too" he says placing the water on his table, "so just to confirm you wanted a lower back tattoo today?" he asks looking from the texts back to me "yup, do you still have the photo?" i ask, reaching into my shorts back pocket grabbing for my phone, "yea this right?" he says before turning his ipad to face me showing me the picture i sent, i nod with a smile "perfect" he says, as he pulls out the stencil, i lay on my stomach on his chair, pulling the top of my jeans down a little so nick had room to put the stencil where i wanted it. "hows this" he asks showing me the placement through a mirror "that's great thank you" i say turning back onto my stomach, "okay lets get started then" nick says with a clap.
-5:30pm-
"and we're done" nick announces sliding back in his chair, "that hurt way more than the stars" i laugh, "im sure it did, can i take some pictures for my profile?" nicks asks holding his phone in his hand, "of course" "okay, itll only be a couple seconds" he says before snapping away "thanks y/n", "always, i mean i wouldn't even have it if it wasn't for you so you can take as many photos as you want"
-2 days later-thursday-
"third tattoo in a week y/n? your crazy" chris laughs as i walk into the shop once again, "you know it chris, youre gonna get sick of me" i laugh, "i dont think i could" he admits, as i walk through the stations into nicks at the back, "hey girl, we doing the butterflies on the back today?" nick asks looking up from his ipad, "that's the one" i confirm putting my bag on the floor, "okay girl come lay down" nick directs picking up the stencil, i pull of my top leaving my top half in a bikini i put on so it doesn't get in the way for nick.
"it looks amazing nick thank you" i smile looking in the mirror, "of course y/n, you're my favourite client i could have you here everyday" nick says while wrapping the tattoo, "i would be here everyday but i would go broke" i chuckle.
=NO POV= like 2-3weeks timeskip-
every 2-4 days y/n came back for another tattoo, she now has a total of 10 tattoos which include her stars on her wrist, her butterflies on her back, her lower back tattoo, a flower by her boob, a butterfly in between her boobs, stars on her stomach, 444 on her arm, butterflies behind her ear, a hand tattoo, and a butterfly on her thigh.
y/n had booked in to come again to get 3 stars on her ankle in 3 days, nick had set everything up and was ready for y/n to walk in on time as normal so when she didn't he was a little worried but shrugged it off and shot her a text asking where she was. the time went by and nicks next customer had arrived, nick was concerned about y/n but carried on with his day as he would've. after the store closed nick packed up and met chris and matt in the lobby.
"wasn't y/n meant to come by at 4 today?" chris asked nick with locking the door to the stations, "yeah, i texted her but i haven't heard anything" nick replied, "hm weird" chris hummed.
-3 days later-1pm-
no one had heard from y/n. vee had gone to new york a week after they got their stars so she wasn't to aware of what was going on but Delilah and Cassidy was worried so they decided to stop by the shop to see if nick had seen her as they knew she was there almost everyday.
"hey Delilah, Cassidy, here for another tattoo?" chris asks from behind the desk, "um no we were wondering if y/n had been here in the past few days, we haven't heard from her and we know shes been coming here a lot" Cassidy says, "oh um no i haven't seen her, let me go get nick for you" chris gets up from his seat and walks through to the back station where nick is, "wassup chris" nick not looking away from his sketchpad, "Delilah and Cassidy are here looking for y/n" nick looks up at chris with furrowed eyebrows, "what" "yeah they're in the lobby, i said id get you" chris nods, nick gets up placing his sketchpad on his chair behind him before following chris to the lobby. "hey guys" nick says his eyebrows only slightly scrunched now, "hey, uh have you seen or heard from y/n?" Delilah asks worried, "um no i haven't, she was meant to come in what 3 days ago?" he looks back to chris who nods, "for a tattoo but she didn't show, i texted her too but no reply" nick shakes his head at the end of his sentence. Delilah and Cassidy just look at each other like they were talking to one another through their minds "do you think her dads back?" Cassidy says just above a whisper to which Delilah bites her lip shaking her head slightly while shrugging. "thanks nick, but um we're gonna go, if you hear from her youll let us know right?" cass turns towards nick whos leaning against the front desk, "yea of course, text me if she shows up i miss my boo" nicks says standing up straight. Delilah and Cassidy both wave as they leave the store. nick turns to chris whos scrolling through his phone "im gonna go back to my station Elizabeth should be here for a coverup in 10" chris looks up to his brother and nods before nick leaves.
-next day-4am-
'y/n'
nikk hel sent 4:07am
-NICK POV-10am-
"what the hell" i mutter under my breath as i pick up my phone from my nightstand. i haven't heard from y/n in like 5 days and shes finally texted me back but what shes said concerns me, nick hel im so confused, did she mean hello? hell? helmet? help? why would she need help? she probably just got drunk and misspelt hello.
'nickyy<33(tats)'
hey y/n! where have you been girl i missed you!! sent 10:17am
i shoot a quick text to the Delilah and Cassidy that y/n had texted me.
nick
heyy just wanted to lyk that i heard from y/n ^screenshot of nick and y/ns texts^ sent 10:23am
Delilah
omg thankyou for telling us dyk what she meant? sent 10:25am
nick
i thought maybe she was drunk and meant hello but idk, it was sent at like 4am i might just be weird but have a bad feeling about it sent 10:28am
Delilah
y/n wont drink by herself, shes always with me, cass, vee or some of her friends from work but they all said they haven't spoken to her in like a week plus vees in new york sent 10:32am
Cassidy
she spelt your name wrong and didn't finish the word 'hello' when shes drunk she can still type? sent 10:33am
Delilah
wait your right maybe she had to send it quickly and wasn't paying attention? but then what would she be saying sent 10:34am
nick
help? it would explain typing fast if she was in danger but what from? sent 10:36am
Delilah
cass did you find out if her dads back? sent 10:36am
Cassidy
i didn't think he is maybe he just got back? sent 10:37am
nick
whats up with her dad?? sent 10:37am
Delilah
hes an abusive prick who should be in jail but y/n wont say anything. sent 10:38am
Cassidy
Delilah rose. sent 10:38am
nick
i dont mean to overstep but wdym? sent 10:39am
Cassidy
y/n and her dad dont get along, hes never been good to her for her whole life but y/n will let everything go "bc hes still her dad" she says sent 10:39am
Delilah
he was better than he is now before her mum died sent 10:40am
Cassidy
he was still a jerk del sent 10:41am
Delilah
he was MORE than just a jerk but im just saying hes worse now sent 10:41am
nick
oh shit sent 10:42am
Cassidy
yea sent 10:42am
nick
so do u think her dad did smt? sent 10:42am
Cassidy
that's what we're worried about sent 10:43am
Delilah
he better not have or istg sent 10:43am
nick
cant we go to their apartment? sent 10:44am
Cassidy
we tried before we came to ur shop no one answered sent 10:44am
Delilah
she basically always answers the door sent 10:45am
nick
if her dads back in town would he go to y/ns apartment? or does he have a house somewhere sent 10:46am
cassidy
he would usually go to y/ns apartment, saying like he goes more than once every 100 years. he sold their childhood house after her mum died y/n said he said it was cause the pain was too much but it was obviously for money cause he bought some small shitty house in the middle of fucking nowhere and spent the rest on fuck knows what sent 10:48am
-timeskip-NO POV-
just over 2 months go by since y/n disappeared, they've gone to her apartment atleast once or twice a week to see if she shows up but still nothing. they went to the police but they aren't taking it seriously because shes 19 and 'most likely ran away', which they all find ridiculous. matt, chris, nick, madi, Delilah, and Cassidy all sit at the lake where del, cass, vee, and y/n would go whenever they felt they needed an escape hoping shell show up but mainly to try distract themselves from their missing friend. nick, del, and cass have been really down not knowing where she is or what happened, they called vee and asked her if y/n had shown up to her school or new apartment but nope, vee said she last saw her the day she left, shes said multiple times over the phone that shell drop everything to come back to cali for the girls but they said for her to stay, just incase y/n was trying to get here. vee and y/n had been friends for as long as they could both remember, their mums became friends when y/n was 3 and vee was 4 and they instantly clicked, so inseparable you'd never see one without they other, they were basically sisters.
the whole group was at the lake having a small picnic. they talked, ate, and swam from 4pm to 12:30am. matt and chris dropped madi home then went back to their house, while nick, del, and cass went back to delilahs, they tried texting y/ns number but to no surprise there was no answer.
-NICK POV-next day-5am-
y/n calling
"oh my god y/n??" i yell into the phone bringing it to my ear. "nick? nick please, its my dad, hes drunk again, i- i need help AHH" i jump dropping my phone, her scream gets cut off by the phone hanging up, i quickly call her back but im met with no answer. i call her again and again but to no avail she doesnt pick up.
i turn over in the bed to del and cass still asleep, i reach over shaking del as she was next to me "nick? whats going on its 5am?" she groans half asleep, "y/n just fucking called me an-" "omg what what happened" she cuts me off "she said her dads drunk and then started saying she needs help before screaming like shes in a fucking horror movie, then it hung up, i tried calling her back like a million times but she didnt answer" i quickly explain pulling on my shoes as del wakes cass. "whats going on" cass grumbles, "y/n just called nick we need to go now cmon get up" after hearing del, cass shoots up quickly slipping on her shoes. we all rush out of delilahs house, del slipping on her crocs by the door. we jump into cassidys car and speed just over the limit to y/ns.
as soon as we get there we all jump out and get to the front door, "dont buzz the door lets go round the back" cass says leading us round. we all rush up in press the 6 button in the elevator for the 6th floor. once the the door opens enough we push out and run over to y/ns door. i knock on it but it doesnt open, no sound or movement can be heard inside. "do you think they left?" i ask the girls next to me. "im not sure" del says trying to look through the peep hole, "its like no ones been here but where else would she be?" she adds, nick shrugs and so does Cassidy. "wait y/ns spare key" del remembers bending down to the plant pot next to the door moving around the soil inside looking for the key before finding it and picking it up, unlocking the door. "wont y/n be mad we're like intruding her home?" nick asks "nah its fine shell understand" cassidy places her hand on his shoulder as the two follow Delilah. "look around try see if y/ns here" cass directs before walking into the bathroom, "it doesn't looks like anybodys been here in months" del mumbles entering y/ns bedroom, nick going to the open plan kitchen-living room area. they all look around but find nothing.
-NO POV-
"Delilah!" cass shouts from the guest bedroom, del and nick rush to the room to see cass stood next to the bed, "what?!" cass steps aside revealing a big dark blue suitcase opened on the messy bed filled with males things, she lifts the tag connected to the handing reading it "george y/l/n, its her dads" she looks to the del with worry over her face "shit, did u see anything in the living room or kitchen?" delilah asks looking to nick, "i dont think so, but im not quite sure what could be different, ive only been here a couple times" nick purses his lips after his sentence. delilah walks behind nick to the room, looking around before noticing the corner of the kitchen island has chipped, she glides her finger over it looking around the area to see if anything else is different to then see a barely noticeable small dark red spot on the floor as if it dripped from the missing corner and was attempted to been cleaned, "guys look!" del shouts, nick and cass run in and see what del found. "what is that?" cass questions bending down sitting on her ankles looking at the spot without touching it, "i could be way off but it looks like blood" nick says mirroring cassidys sitting position. "i really hope its not" delilah mumbles "we should go to the hospital see if shes there, even if shes not itll be worth checking" she adds walking to the front door, "wait del you have something on your shoe" nick points out, del looks down picking off the paper, unfolding it and turning it to see it had been written on. it takes her a minute trying to read the messy writing "the handwriting is horrible, y/ns is usually like perfect" she mutters, "what does it say?" cass asks wrapping her hand on dels arm, nick the other side of del. "urm 'idk if any1 is gonna find this but dads back + his drinking is the worst ive ever seen and idk how long ill last wit him like this. im rlly scared an'" del squints a little trying to make out the words "it just ends there? in the mid of the sentence" del scrunches her eyebrows flipping around the note to see if she missed anything, "what the fuck" nick mumbles, "cmon lets check the hospital, bring that with u del".
-12:27pm-
they get to the hospital and head straight to the front desk, cassidy asks if anyone called 'y/n y/l/n' had been admitted and the receptionist confirms that only a y/n coleman had come in today, which caused delilah to furrow her eyebrows in confusion as her last name is coleman. she thought 'surely its just a coincidence' she looks to cass who has the same reaction on her face, they ask what room y/n coleman is in and the women says room 293. they all head up to the fourth floor, and walk down the hall until they see a blue sign hanging out above a room reading 'room 293'. cassidy peaks into the room to see y/n laying in the bed asleep with a white bandage wrapped around her head. "wait omg, shes in here?" cass says in a confused tone, walking into the room, delilah behind her "why has she come in with my last name" del asks, moving to y/ns side holding her hand. "im not sure" cass tilts her head looking around the bare hospital room, the only things in there being the bed, a chair and a set of drawers, all belonging to the hospital, as she opens the drawers to see theyre empty she looks to del, "do you think her dad knows shes here?" del shrugs. nick then walks into the room, "where the fuck did you go?" del questions, "i was talking to a doctor about what happened to her" he responds walking to the side of y/n opposite Delilah, "So?" cass walks over. "apparently some man, i assume her dad, came in with her passed out in his arms..
"i need some help over here" George shouts walking into the large building, 2 nurses rush over with a gurney, George lays y/n down on it and the nurses push it through the hallway, "sir what happened?" one asks, "she uh she- she was in the kitchen making herself food when she dropped her phone and banged her head on the counter reaching to pick it up" he quickly speaks in a serious tone, "how long has she been out for?" the same nurse questions, "id say for around 45 minutes. i brang her here straight after i found her and she lives 10 minutes away, 25 with traffic" the nurse nods to his answer as they push y/n into a room, leaving George outside.
after half an hour to an hour passes, a doctor exits y/ns room to inform George of what had occurred in the room to find no one outside waiting, the doctor waits outside for 5-10 minutes before looking around the hallways by the room. confused he goes to the front desk and asks if the man had left, the receptionist looks up from her desk and nods her head yes, "i saw him leave i think 45 minutes ago but dont quote me on it" she smiles, looking back down to her computer, the doctor thanks her before returning to y/ns room, he checks her making sure the bandage is on correctly and that shes stable before leaving.
..the doctor said that she hit her head pretty hard to cause it to bleed out but no long term damage though she does have black eye, a few broken blood vessels and a concussion." nick finishes. "woah" del sighs, "should she be asleep with a concussion?" cass asks biting the side of her bottom lip, nick shrugs "doctor said she hasn't woken up yet."
-15:38pm-2 hours later-Y/N POV-
i wake up to my head pounding, squinting my eyes open to bright lights shining above me i lift my hand up to my forehead where the migraine is rubbing over the area. "omg y/n youre awake" i hear from my right side, i slightly jump turning to see nick getting up from the chair. "nick?" i whisper, scrunching my face "yea its me, are you okay?" he says pouring some water into a plastic cup "i guess so, my heads pounding" i groan, taking the cup from nick chugging it down, "nick who are you- omg! y/n youre awake!" Delilah squeals running over wrapping her arms around me "hi del" i smile hugging her back, "del quieten down, she has a headache" nick says just above a whisper, trying not to worsen y/ns pain. "oh sorry baby, i just missed you so fucking much. where the fuck have you been?" del asks, sitting on the side of the bed, her legs hanging of the edge, "i-um its a long story" i shake my head, leaning my head back on the upright pillow, then cass walks in before she can say anything del quickly and bluntly says "sh dont be loud" cass nods opting to not say anything before rushing over giving me a hug, "hi cass" i giggle, reciprocating her embrace. "y/n was just about to tell us what the hell happened the past two months" del reveals, my eyes widen and jaw drops "its been two months??" i almost yell but my dehydrated throat wont let me. they all look at me confused, "yea y/n its the 27th of august" i look down to my lap with furrowed eyebrows. how the hell has two whole fucking months gone by "y/n?" i look up to cass speaking to me "are you okay n/n?" i slowly nod, not even believing myself. "what the hell happened to you baby" delilah whispers as her head tilts to the side in sympathy. "im not even sure anymore" i bring my hands to my face covering my eyes for a moment attempting to focus my racing thoughts. "its okay baby, take your time" del reaches and rubs my shoulder, making me flinch under her touch, "y/n?" "m'sorry i didn't mean to" i mumble avoiding all their eyes looking down on me, "its okay y/n, just take it slow and tell us what happened" nick says crouching slightly to my level.
after a minute, i take another sip of my water and sit up a little more "ill start from when my dad arrived, the closer to now its all sort of a blur" i take in a breath before continuing "i remember getting ready for my tattoo appointment with nick when the door knocked, i thought it was you two so i opened it without looking but to my surprise it was my dad holding a big suitcase, he walked in ignoring me, heading straight for the spare bedroom, i obviously followed him and asked him what he was doing, he told me he needed somewhere to stay and that because im his daughter i had to help him so i did-" i interrupt myself with a coughing fit, bring my left hand to cover my mouth. "here y/n drink your water" nick tries to help passing me a refilled cup of water, i take it and bring it to my mouth drinking almost all of it, my coughs stop and i clear my throat "sorry, um what was i saying?" "you let your dad in" "right yea um, so i let him and i said about his drinking and he slapped me and said not to question him and to remember my place, i guess i had to deal with that for a few days before he started to get worse" i sniffle and wipe the tear that started to brim my waterline, "he uh he broke my phone and started to get more violent" "oh baby' cas whispers leaning me into her chest, wrapping her arms around me. "its all kind of a blur from there, im sorry" i sniffle again, a few tears fall down my face, "no y/n dont you dare apologise okay" del snaps "none of this is on you, its on that horrible man" "del calm down" Cassidy says as i look down to my hands fiddling with each other. "no cass, no i wont calm down because no one should be treated like this its disgusting. it makes me literally want to-" "Delilah rose stop it right now!" cassidy speaks firmly instantly shutting Delilah up, "thank you" she says politely, "im sorry y/n i didn't want to shout" she mumbles next to my ear. del walks over to me gently bringing her hand to the large purple bruise spread over my cheek and jaw, rubbing her thumb over it "im sorry baby, i just hate to see you hurt" i lean into her hand and close my eyes, finding comfort in dels hand and the slight pain from the bruise. i open my eyes a second later to see Delilah looking at me with a small smirk, "what?" i lift my head from her hand, "nothing" she mumbles backing away.
after 20 minutes of just talking, comforting each other, the doctor walks in. "hello y/n, how are you feeling?" she kindly smiles, holding a clipboard to her chest, "i have a bad headache but im okay" i smile back, she asks if i want tablets to help to which i nod, she steps outside for a moment before coming back in handing me some with a bottle of water "thank you" i say taking 2 of the pills. "if you feel well enough, the hospital says youre allowed to go home" i smile nodding a little "yea, yea i do" "of course, just remember you have a concussion meaning headaches and trouble with concentration, memory, balance, mood and sleep, and they usually last between 14 and 21 days. and then with the broken blood vessels if you place a cool compress on them and they should soon clear up. i have this paper bag that has information about everything if you need it and some pills for any migraines or pains you may experience" she informs handing me to light blue bag "thank you".
-20:12pm-10 mins later-
"right so where are we going?" Cassidy asks as we all pile into her car, Delilah helping me into the seat behind Cassidy. "we can go back to mine? i think matt chris and madi are there" nick says pulling on his seatbelt, "sounds good" Cassidy nods starting the car.
-20:33pm-20 minutes later-
we pull up to nicks house and we all click of our seatbelts, Cassidy opens my door and helps me out while del runs over to help. we walk through the front door following cass whos following nicks up the stairs into their living room, who matt and madi were sat. "holy shit y/n?" madi says jumping up rushing over bringing me into a hug, "what?! no way is y/n here?!!" chris shouts from the bathroom, you can hear him rushing out to see if im actually here. "no fucking way" matt stands up pulling me into a side up after madi let go. chris then runs out the bathroom wrapping his hands around my shoulders "i cant believe youre actually here" he says grinning, "me neither" i mumble, he takes a step back placing his palms on the corners of my shoulders, "are you okay? where have you been??" he goes on to ramble before nick stops him, "chris she just walked through the door, please give her a minute" he says as we all walk to the sofa, sitting down. "im okay" i sigh a little.
everyone talks in their conversations, while ive been sitting in silence spacing out then Delilah wraps her arm around me, "are you okay y/n?" "mhm" i nod absently, "baby look at me" i slowly turn to look at her seeing a concerned look over her face, "whats going on?" "m'just tired del" i hum. "okay c'mere" she says bringing me into her chest, i lay there and close my eyes, easily falling asleep.
-NO POV-
"is she okay?" matt asks from the end of the sofa, "yea shes just tired" Delilah nods, stroking her fingers through y/ns hair. "i dont wanna overstep but is there something going on between you and y/n?" chris leans forward looking at the two sat together, blocking their view of madi and cassidy sharing the corner, "no not at all, shes my best friend", cassidy laughs a little shaking her head a little "del calls y/n baby because y/ns the youngest and smallest out of all of us, so shes like our baby" "ohhh" chris leans against the back of the sofa. nick turns to cass and whispers in her ear "theres gotta be something going on between them to or am i reading this all wrong?" to which she quietly giggles and whispers in his ear "oh a hundred percent, i just dont think they know it yet" she nods in the direction of me and delilah laying together.
after another couple hours of talking everyone eventually goes to bed, madi and nick going to nicks room, matt and chris going to matts room, and Cassidy going to chris room. Delilah decided to stay on the couch with y/n, not wanting to disturb her sleep.
-7pm-Y/N POV-
we all hung out today at the triplets house, we watched movies, ate snacks, talked and what not. "i thinks its time i go home, its getting late and i wanna get in my bed" i laugh a little nearing the end of my sentence, "what if your dads there n/n" cass asks, "im not sure if he will be, if hes the one who brang me to the hospital he would've for sure disappeared after" i shrug, "let me take you, then i can be there for you if he is" matt suggest standing up, "thank you matt" i say getting up but then falling back onto the sofa, i chuckle before speaking again "got a bit dizzy there" i try stand up again but delilah stands with me, "ill come with, see you later everyone" "byee" we all exchange byes before walking down to the garage.
-7:56pm-
"okay we're here, ill walk up with you two incase your dads there then once everything is all good ill leave you two be" matt speaks, getting out the car following me and delilah, "Sounds good" i say and delilah nods. once we get up to my apartment you can see the door is slightly ajar, "del the doors open" i whisper pointing to the door, she turns to matt behind us who has furrowed brows and is walking to get ahead of us. he reaches the door as pushes it open to see an empty apartment, "is he in there?" del asks, matt shakes his head, "doesn't look like it" he stated walking in, looking around, "y/n theres a note on the counter" he yells from the kitchen, me and del walk in hand in hand into the room. i look at the counter picking up the note, i open it and read;
'y/n if youre reading this that means you got home okay i want you to know that im sorry im not the father you deserve which is why you wont have to deal with me anymore i should've quit drinking for you but i just couldn't its not your fault, none of this im sorry it had to be this way mum would be proud of you dad x'
i wipe a couple tears falling down my cheek as i speak up "i dont think hes coming back again" delilah picks up the note giving it a scan over before dropping it down and wrapping me in a hug. ive gotten a lot of hugs recently. "im sorry y/n" matt says from behind me, i turn my head to him "thanks matt" i sniffle, "im gonna head out, is that okay?" he asks, "of course matt, del ill be back im just gonna have a shower quick" i say walking to my room, matt following behind me as my bathroom is on the way to the front door. i push open the bathroom door to my dad on the floor in a pool of blood. i let a loud scream falling back into matt, who looks confused before he sees what i have. del rushes over to see me on the floor hiding my face in matts chest, "whats?! matt what is it??" del says sitting on her ankles next to us, matt hasn't said anything still in shock but trying to comfort me, delilah turns her head to see the horror i stumbled upon. she doesn't say anything but lifts me up from matt bringing me into the living room, sitting me on the couch by the arm, "stay here y/n itll be okay" she whispers before walking into the hallway. the words in his note repeat in my head 'you wont have to deal with me anymore' 'its not your fault' 'im sorry it had to be this way' again and again in my head, i start to lose my breath, feeling like i cant breath, my vision starts to blur itself, i cant focus on anything but the note and the scene in my bathroom, "y/n? y/n you need to breath" del tries to help, "matt!" she yells. "y/n listen to me you need to focus on breathing can you do that for me?" matt says in a steady voice, "look here copy my breathing" he lifts my hand from my lap, uncurling it from its fist placing my palm on his chest, "you feel that, there you go keep going youre doing so well y/n" he reassures me, after a few seconds my breathing regulates and my vision focuses on matt infront of me, holding my hand against his chest, he lowers my hand into my lap "its okay y/n, youre okay" del says from next to me holding onto my other hand. i struggle for what to say for a minute before whispering "he- he left me" dropping my head, closing my eyes "hes not ever coming back" i shake my head a few tears falling onto my lap. del moves her hand up and down my back "itll be okay y/n i promise".
-
this is rlly old, like i think its the second fanfic ive ever written idk
this bitch has been sat in the drafts for time lmfaoo but i havent posted a fix in a while sooo🤷♀️
THANK YOU FOR READING
LOVE U HOES
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more darlin hcs..... evil laugh
tw for mention of death and drugs
im gonna give u guys the family names cus itll get confusing w the siblings i think.
their oldest brother is called lucien, then its their sister camilla, then julius (darlin) then their little brother kenji (kenny) and then the youngest, aisha.
IM SORRY IF ITS CONFUSING!!!!
their dad is called ronan and their mom is called kalliyan
ronan was a vet! he lost his leg in an explosion and wears a prosthetic which julius helped him take off and put it on. he also would take his dad to the store in his wheelchair and stuff
julius used to also get into arguments w racist strangers who would insult his parents when they didn't even know enough english to understand what was going on.
despite his parents' abuse and neglect, julius loved them he saught out their approval a lot. he wanted to make them proud and happy even if it seemed impossible. he hated himself for it and tried to stop, but he always felt ashamed and guilty when his parents would be disappointed in him. he wished he didn't care like lucien and camilla.
he used to have a little brother who was aisha's twin, but he passed away from cancer when he and aisha were very young, around 4 years old. julius was 14 and he didn't get a chance to properly until he was nearing his adult years because of how much responsibilities he had
he blamed himself for a long time. he did everything he could to give his younger siblings a good life despite their parents and he felt very useless, like he should have been able to stop it even though he was literally unable to. he cried for hours when the family dog accidentally ruined one of his little brother's stuffed animals
one of his first tattoos was one for his little brother
julius was sent to an empowered tti (troubled teen industry)
he tries to come off as very cold and aloof, but he feels things deep
his dad pushed toxic masculinity onto him and his brothers, so he was convinced he was unable to cry until being with sam
rather than letting himself feel sadness, he often let it turn into anger. it was something he was more familiar with, something that felt more manly, which is why he was so reckless
he also threw himself into dangerous situations because he cared very little for himself. he felt like he deserved the consequences because he hurts people with his anger. it was like revenge to himself for hurting people he cares about
he had unhealthy coping mechanisms, often turning to drugs whenever things became too much. he used drugs more while dating quinn. (he went to rehab in washington)
julius never really got much sleep. as a teenager, he'd either be dealing with his parents during the night or working night shifts. when it'd be neither, he'd be woken by kenji because he often got night terrors. after breaking up with quinn, he slept even less. he felt extremely guilty for his unempowered friend, trevor, being attacked by quinn. he'd have nightmares and sleepless nights filled with guilt and regret. the first time he slept a full proper night was in the cuddles and confessions audio with sam.
the first time he was healed by marie, she was so gentle and talked to him softly, like a mother should, and it was something he had been longing for from his mother for so long that he cried when he got home
ON A MORE LIGHTER NOTE...
julius used to have a crush on milo. they like pretty boys with accents, its a given
julius had more muscle than quinn. quinn was just a vampire, so he was stronger
idk if this belongs in the angst section but he used to wear one of his dad's vet hats a lot. it's still in his closet somewhere
he and his siblings would have arguments over stupid shit then forgive each other in 5 seconds. like yelling at each other than a minute later julius is like hey do you wanna go to this restaurant with me lol...
when sam zipped away from him in their very first audio, julius was sooo giddy cus he loved sam's accent
HE LOVES LIZARDS!!!! he used to go around and look for them. one of his first times at david's house as a teen there was a tiny lizard on the wall nd he just picked it up and was just like "...lizard."
hes just an awkward little loser i lvoe him.
FNAF PHASE! CREEPYPASTA PHASE! NIGHTCORE PHASE!
he has a shirt that says "blowjobs are real jobs" and he wears it unironically
one of his first roommates ever had a whole room for her big ass iguana. to this day, julius is bitter that he never got to pet it
he need glasses but he never wears them outside. he's walked past the pack and the mates multiple times without even knowing, especially cause he goes into his own little world when he walks
one time he walked past lovely with his headphones on and he couldn't tell it was them. all he thought was "dude why is this stranger staring me down??"
he calls sam his bitch sometimes cause he thinks its so funny. sam stares at him with a deadpan expression
he has a metal plate in his eye socket that he needed to get when he was a baby. he sticks magnets to his face when he's bored but it gives him really bad headaches in the cold
loves side-eyeing
will talk about his trauma casually.
"that actually reminds me of the time my mom tried to shoot my dad! haha, oh that was so crazy. the cops came. :)"
also, leather jacket luvr
he has a motorcycle
tongue piercing (sam loves it)
#redacted audio#redacted asmr#redacted darlin#redacted sam#redacted quinn#redacted tank#redacted headcanons
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cried in the shower and meds are kicking in now so im all okay again or close enough <3
waking up and remembering I have to live the rest of my life today and tomorrow and so on ☹️
#its okay having a secondrate life bc its mine. and theres no rush i can take things at a slower pace than everyone else#and if i have more intense ups and downs well thats just part of being me. fulfillment isnt gonna come in the same way it does for others#just brushed a little too close to triggers yesterday and I think it didnt help being out so late bc my meds wear off#so i was crashing while also trying to handle a sensitive cluster of emotional nerves which. yeah was a really bad idea#but nothing new im still just recovering from my fucking rsd episodes in may it undid a year n a half of emotional work in a week#idk how long itll take before i feel like i have a solid foothold again.. it wasnt like i was perfectly secure before then anyway#so frustrating but just gotta live around it for now while it continues to heal. and not stick my grubby fingers in the open wound#also took my meds like 2 hours later than normal today bc i forgor and i dont think my body appreciated that 🫣#man if this temporary private healthcare situation ends up not being temporary and i have to quit taking meds entirely. uh#well the withdrawal is not going to be fun. im gonna have to ask friends to keep a very close watch on me if that happens#at least i have a pretty decent supply atm so hopefully ill know in enough time to be able to gradually wean myself off#like i can take half doses n stuff for a while. and hopefully thatll stop me killing myself lmao#but yeah. still a bit sad but its not a new ache so lets not worry abt it. much milder and more tolerable like this anyway#im gonna go out n vote before i forget to. and then play some elden ring when im back maybe#and then when my friends up we can go for brunch somewhere :-) and then i have the whooole afternoon 2 chill#and then climbing yippeeee and then work tomorrow booooo but at least just a day til the weekend#okay! lets go#.diaries
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↳ 𝐁𝐋𝐋𝐊 𝐁𝐎𝐘𝐒 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐁𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐁𝐋𝐄𝐌𝐒:
chigiri hyouma, itoshi rin, isagi yoichi, shidou ryusei
cw: !SUGGESTIVE!
the writers block is rlly hitting rn so yall get headcanons instead !!
CHIGIRI HYOMA
- i cannot help myself when it comes to chigiri being a tease…
- chigiri who comes up behind you and leans in close to your nape, causing you shiver at the intimacy. his hair draping over your shoulder as he presses forward.
- he nibbles at the shell of your ear, letting his teeth press gently against your skin. and you can feel his hot breath over your ear but you cant turn around or run away cause hes got a strong hold around your waist
- and hes pulling away with a breathy chuckle, watching your embarrassed reaction from just that
- chigiri who also likes to bite your tongue when you kiss him..
- you swipe at his bottom lip with your tongue and at the contact, hes surging forward to capture the tip of your tongue between his teeth.
- its not enough to make you bleed, but he bites hard enough to have you panting when you pull away. and hes wiping away at his mouth with the back of his hand letting out another chuckle before pulling you back in. except ths time he goes for you bottom lip
ITOSHI RIN
- rin has a possessive streak because i said so
- he wants to keep you far, far away from anyone who threatens to take you away from him
- borderline TOXIC because of how possessive he acts
- what better way to establish youre his and only his than leaving bite marks everywhere?
- hes practically on you like a rabid dog as he marks up your neck whether it be bites or hickies
- he wants everyone to see the deep bute marks and dark red bruises when he takes you out the next day. proudly and unashamedly possessive over you even in public
- bites over each side of your nape and hickies littering your collar bones, he loves tasting your skin on your tongue knowing that itll leave a mark
- and when they start fading, hes quick to give you fresh ones
ISAGI YOICHI
- isagi’s biting problem is definitely a guilty pleasure
- he first thought it was creepy the furst time he felt the urge to bite you. eyes raking over the soft skin on your body and he has this urge to have you in between his teeth
- (i headcanon isagi loving body worship/nsx🔥)
- hes kissing up and down your arms all the way to the tip of your fingers and hes holding back the urge to just bite
- its a private thing for him to do, he only does it when hes alone with you and hes feeling affectionate. call it possessiveness
- not even hard, just a little nibble. but he gets embarrassed, he thinks its strange and kind of creepy that he wants to bite the one he loves
- but when he asks with a deep blush on his face and you simply say its okay, youre not leaving til he gets his fill
- hes not a hard biter. he likes to nip at your skin just enough to make it sore when you touch it later. and he doesnt even think about that you might be sore later, he wants to bite and thats exactly what hes going to do
SHIDOU RYUSEI
- “youre so cute i could eat you up!” but in a very literal sense
- an action for affection from him, he thinks its sweet and he likes how you get grumpy because it hurt
- he likes to bite you literally anywhere. his favorites though is the soft place between the base of your neck and your shoulder
- coming up behind you and wrapping his arms around your waist while resting his head down on your shoulder. and he just— bites you. teeth scraping lightly against the soft skin just to get a reaction out of you
- when you whip your head around and tell him to quit it, he only slyly smiles, seeing the embarrassment creeping up your face
- just like chigiri, he loves doing it just to see your reactions, how far can he go before youre chasing back for more?
- and 100% hes holding back. hes got a deep desire to just bite down and leave red teeth marks everywhere on your body.
- but he sticks to playful nibbles along your shoulder while his biting problem only brews more, waiting for the day you let him completely devour you
#chigiri hyoma#blue lock#blue lock fluff#chigiri x you#chigiri x reader#chigiri x y/n#chigiri headcanons#bllk chigiri#itoshi rin#itoshi rin x y/n#itoshi rin x reader#itoshi rin x you#itoshi rin headcanons#bllk itoshi rin#isagi yoichi#bllk isagi#isagi x you#isagi x y/n#isagi x reader#isagi headcanons#shidou ryusei#bllk shidou#shidou x reader#shidou x you#shidou x y/n#bllk smut#shidou headcanons#h4venpha#blue lock headcanons#isagi fluff
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Okay so absolutely loving your writing sm <3
So I had this idea while, of course, scrolling down the aaron x reader tag so like you dont have to write it if you dont want to but i wanna throw this out here bc otherwise itll stay stuck in my brain
But like reader who is just,, incredibly shy? Like in social situations they put up a front and you would never expect them to be shy because theyre very present and speak up often despite almost blending in the background when quiet. But its a whole other story at home and such?
Like, Aaron notices and first thinks theyre uncomfortable with him but he slowly realizes that this is like, their love language ig and showing vulnerability? Quiet time, acts of service and such yk? Like, they always put up a front and to drop that (not entirely ofc but a decent amount of it) is just the highest form of trust bc theyve been ridiculed for being shy? And the shyness is much more present in the bedroom, especially when he praises them they just get even more shy and hes just so so gentle :(( like asking if theyre okay, going slowly and asking to see them when they hide their face but never forcing them to and just like praising them when they do and the praise kink of them just sticks its head up and its just the purest form of being together? Like, its not rough but gentle and its soft and theres really no other word than making love for it and its all just :(( and the aftercare the man would provide is just AHHH😭❤️
Oh dear im so sorry but i got sucked into the fandom and got obsessed by hotch and then your writing so- this is so long so imma shut up now but i just needed to throw it out there tbh before id explode from all the hotch ideas i have in my mind that im not writing myself or giving to any writer bc what if they think the ideas are weird or too long like rn- but anyway imma shut up have a nice day/night and hydrate <3 (also you might see more of me if you dont mind long ass rants in the middle of it like this one- if you do mind just tell me to shut up im not gonna be mad or anything <3/srs)
-🧽
my sweet sweet 🧽 anon <33 this took me a while to write i'm sorry!! i hope you've been well!! i think about you a lot and i haven't forgotten the kind words you had sent to me <3 i hope you enjoy this!! (and ofc i don’t mind long rants i LOVE talking about aaron <3333)
nsfw - minors dni
♡ ♡ ♡ ♡
“Can I, honey?” you heard Aaron’s words as he wrapped his hands around your wrists.
You had been covering your face as you usually did when your boyfriend went down on you. After making you finish, Aaron had made his way up again, urging you nicely to look at him.
With a nod of your head, you gave him permission to gently remove your hands from your face.
“There you are.” He smiled at you.
“Hi,” you said, softly, unable to keep yourself from smiling a little.
“Hi,” he answered, just as softly. “Do you wanna taste yourself, baby?”
“Mhm…” You nodded, staring at his chin instead of his eyes.
Your own eyes closed involuntarily, as he lowered himself and his lips touched yours. You opened your mouth, allowing his tongue to touch yours. Knowing where that tongue had been before it was inside your mouth, made you even more excited for what was coming next.
Aaron placed his hand on your hip, giving it a squeeze and then moved it down your thigh, wrapping your leg around his body. “Open them wider, sweetheart.”
Only a few moments later, Aaron was inside you, rocking his body against yours, in a pace slow enough to be considered both romantic and tormenting.
“Ah…”
“Good?” he breathed heavily on your mouth.
“So good…”
“I love you,” he moaned, his face now buried in the crook of your neck. He left open mouthed kisses on your sensitive skin after every little whine of yours. “I love your body. I love the sounds you make. I love the way you take me like you were made for me.”
“I was,” you sighed, because you really were. There was no man in the world you’d let yourself be this vulnerable around, other than Aaron. Your Aaron.
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SLEEPY TIME SNUGGLES!
paring:wally x puppet!gn!reader (romantic)
warning:nothing! just mostly fluff ^^
note:the following contains mentions of past personalities, I suggest you look at the following link to understand my puppet y/n au and have a nice read ^^
link: puppet y/n
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it`s the start of a new day!
the sun shines and the birds sing, the air carries the smell of freshly bloomed flowers as spring begins. As the neighborhood becomes awake and busy, wally opens homes door to greet the outside, a smile on his face with a canvus and several bottles of paint in his arms. it was the perfect day to paint he believed "ill be back later home, see you soon!" he speaks to the house as he makes his way out the open door, with a creak and a squeak in response home shuts its door for wally as he had his hands full. what a nice home.
several minutes goes by as wally walks down the yellow pavement, passing by houses and work places of his fellow neighbors. until he spots it, a home that is decorated in a new design compared to yesterday. it`s still wet from fresh paint and the plants in the property was replaced with different plants, a garden gnome that was once there yesterday was replaced with a plastic flamingo and different colored stepping stones. it is the house of his beloved, a wonderful person...or people they are. he wonders who they are today, maybe a florist? or even a baker? whatever they may be today he will love them all the same.
while drawing closer to the house he noticed a person laying in the grass, face planted in the ground with their hair a mess and still wearing pajamas like it is not day just yet. wally drops his painting supplies in shock and runs over to his beloved, his felt heart racing at the thought that they have hurt themselves and he wasn`t here to help "my dear?” wally says as he slightly shakes them, fear gripping his heart....only for him to let out a sigh of relief when the puppet made a sound that resembles a groan and the muffled words "five more minutes".
wally chuckles a bit at his beloveds antic and shakes them again "sweetheart you should be sleeping in your bed, not the grass" wally says in a sweet voice, causing the puppet to turn their head to the side so wally can hear them "i wanted to sleep on my roof but i couldnt find my ladder" they said in a joking tone, it makes wally smile that they are ok. "let me help you up" wally suggested as he helps them off the ground, his beloved lets out a big yawn and rubs their eye, wally now noticed dark circles around their eyes, like they have not slept in days "oh dear, lets get you inside and into bed. itll be much better then the grass" wally stated as he leads them to their own front door "what about your paint stuff?" they asked as they saw the pile of paint supplies wally dropped moments ago, followed by another yawn "it`s not going anywhere" wally says "besides, you are more important" he added to his statement before he leads them inside.
it didn`t take long for wally to take them to their room so they can sleep in their bed, the layout of the home was the only thing that always remained the same each day. he watches as they crawl into their own bed only for them to look in wallys direction and beckons him to come closer, wally does walk over only to expect a goodbye kiss on the cheek. when instead they grabbed his hand to pull him in the bed with them "whoa!" he says in surprise as he now rests on the soft mattress full of many pillows and blankets…with his beloved wrapping their arms around him "stay with me? please? just until i fall asleep" they mumbled, already half way asleep.
wally can feel his heart speed up and his cheeks grow warm, he wouldn`t mind this but it was still a big surprise. he wraps his arms around his beloved "ill stay" he says in a whisper, not wanting to wake them up further by talking in a normal tone. it takes only five minutes for them to finally fall sleep, lightly snoring and their limbs go limp as they relax into their deep slumber. wally wouldn’t dare to move, he would give anything for this moment to last forever, but he knows that soon you both will have to get up and continue the day.
he stares at the nightstand, seeing a alarm clock reading 10:37 and still ticking... maybe a nap couldn't hurt, just 30 minutes longer...and he will then get up and do his daily painting… that sounds nice...
he slowly closes his eyes, being careful not to accidentally 'eat' one of the many trinkets in the room...and eventually...falls into a long blissful sleep.
#wally darling x reader#wally darling x y/n#welcome home#puppet y/n#puppet reader au#welcome home puppet show#welcome home arg#wally darling#so sorry if it’s ooc for Wally#I haven’t written in a while so I hope this is good enough#wally x reader
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tged webtoon ep 154 spoilers n thoughts n all that yeah
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HE DID THE THING HE DID THE >:3 THING YESS YAYYYY YAYAYAYAYY HAHAHAHAA
GOD HES SO FUCKING SILLY WAHAHAHA
jesus christ running from the cops every which way LMAO i really like their faces here javier w exasperation and lloyd just. being him
AND THE UGLY COSPLAYER BIT WHAT 😭 HELP LOL?? i guess cosplayers walking around isnt really a common thing in korea idk i feel like. they didnt really commit an offense until lloyd tried bribing that cop guy lol
like it makes me think back to dkc and how michael and the other guy (I FORGOT HIS NAME SORRY) went to seoul for a bit and kind of caused several accidents and i feel like that fits better w getting the cops attention compared to,,, rummaging thru trash? but also i am not familiar w korea's police system! nor do i know their policies on foreigners n whatnot so who am i to say yknow
i also really really wish that besides the cop chasing, we got to see a lil bit more of javier's reaction to seoul and its citizens, the clothing and the culture and how the buildings look, what does he think of them? whats his feelings on an environment so dissimilar to his own, and does he notice anything abt it that reminds him of lloyd and his sudden acquisition of all his knowledge? maybe theres more of that in the webnovel,,, itll be a while before i get there tho unfortunately
anyways thoughts aside more reacting
UUUAGHHHH JAVIER NOTICING EVERY SINGLE TIME LLOYD APPEARS SICK OR UNWELL BUT LLOYD BRUSHING IT OFF. EXPLODES INTO TEN BILLION PIECES. AAGHH AAGHHHH AAGHH screaming crying god that engineer needs a god damn hug
also them in civilian clothes! they look so dorky lmao the hats r super cute tho AND I REALLY LIKE THAT JAVIER HAS GLASSES THATS SO SILLY how can he see though wouldn't it be like vaguely blurry . most glasses are prescription,,, tho they did find this stuff discarded so maybe theyre just,,, decorative??? do people still wear decorative glasses???
i have more thoughts on their attire but it coincides with some thoughts i have for the latter half of this ep so i'll bring it up then!
THE HIGHLIGHT OF THE EPISODE THE MOUNTAIN TRAIL AAGHHH AAAHHH
i started tearing up oh my FUCKING god i feel so insane ohhhhhhhh ohhhhhhh my heart ohhghhh
trying to keep his bluff up all the way through even though he's visibly struggling im gonna throw up im gonna throw up
most if not all the panels in this latter half of the episode make me feel like this so i'll try not to be repetitive and jump straight into my thoughts LMAO
i think the way lloyd is drawn in these panels is really, REALLY well done, and not in just an "oh the art looks good" kind of way, but the choices they make with the posing and the camera angle makes me feel insane
because the moment we cut to the shot where they're on the trail, we do not see lloyd's entire face at ALL. the most we see is his nose and mouth, and that makes my heart squirm like a motherfucker, because who else did we see that way in the webtoon?
kim suho, all the way at the beginning.
we don't actually get to know suho's face until way, way later in the webtoon adaptation, which is once he's way more secure in his position as lloyd frontera
so seeing this,,, it's like we're thrown back to then, it's like LLOYD is thrown back to then, back to when he was just suho kim; someone who thought of himself as nothing, as someone who just couldn't function correctly in this world, and god does my heart ache
and lloyd right now feels it too, the anxieties he once had coming right back. and i think that makes the clothing choices for lloyd specifically really impactful too, specifically upper body
the blue poloshirt is eerily reminiscent of the blue tracksuit suho used to wear, and it's the layer underneath a green jacket with a collar similar to lloyd's usual coat. it's like a reminder to the reader that once upon a time, he was just suho wearing lloyd's mask in a strange, new world. i think this experience is a reminder of that to suho, too,,,
also, the bucket hat is able to cover most if not all of his hair. in some of these panels, you can't even tell that it's lloyd underneath. it might not be the same body, with the way the camera is positioned, especially with some of them being from javier's point of view, it's like,,, "who is speaking right now? the face of lloyd frontera, or the heart of suho kim?"
and in the middle of this, we hear javier speak and ask suho if he hated his behavior, blamed himself for his anxieties, and only then do we get to see one of his eyes, but just one.
idk if the timing of this is intentional (i dont know if ANY of this direction is intentional) but id like to think that javier responding in search of clarification (rather than responding in silence or in disgust) helped suho be a little more inclined to opening up and being honest with who he was in this world. i really really like that
AND THIS ARGHHH ARGHHH AAAHHHHH ROLLING AROUND ON THE FLOOR LIKE A PILLBUG HAVING A SEIZURE AGHHHH
it makes it so so telling that he's the type to live for others, he always has been, to the point of being a workaholic. a quiet, good kid, trying to make amends for the struggles he has by burdening himself with the responsibility of protecting his parents names, of protecting the people he loved. he's done that since the beginning and he keeps doing that over and over and over, both here on earth and there in lorasia.
it makes me so upset (in a character drive way! not in a "this is bad" way) that he thinks of himself as nothing without this responsibility, when this ability to move forward and endure and fight for people is something beautiful in and of itself. it's not every day that you meet people like this, selfless and hardworking and tenacious to their core. back then he encapsulated his identity based on his inability to function in a world that requires social and physical interaction - something that isn't his fault! - and while he was able to move past that in lorasia, he was thrown back to this encapsulation once in seoul. he started to think of himself as "suho in lloyd's body" again, instead of "i am lloyd frontera" as he said before his "bluff" failed. MY HEART HURTS.
and i think that's why javier's concluding note, that in the knights eyes he is just the same person, is so impactful too.
because javier doesn't see lloyd based on his anxiety. he sees him for who he is. someone who protects the people he cares about. someone who is brilliantly cunning, quick on his feet, rational and brave and tenacious tenacious tenacious. for all the things suho admitted to javier, these truths haven't changed for the knight. he's the same person.
javier sees a guardian. javier sees kim suho.
AND THAT is what gets suho to his feet and we finally see his full face again. AND OOHHHH THE LOOKS THEY GIVE EACH OTHER AGHHHH AHHH
the marks of tears streaked on his face but he's smiling with so much renewed energy and javier softly smiling back IM GONNA THROW UPPPP THESE TWO MEAN THE WORLD TO MEEEE AHHHHHH AAAAAAHHHHHH
exploding. exploding. exploding. exploding. exploding.
anyway that's all (for now. if you see me on twitter i might still be agonizing over this /pos) i will SEE YOU NEXT WEEK! i hope we get a cool view from namsan tower and javier reacting to that that'd be nice :3 ANYWAYS BYE
#tged#the greatest estate developer#tged spoilers#lynn misc#lloyd frontera#javier asrahan#kim suho#lynn yaps#SO SO SORRY FOR ALL THE YAPPING. THIS EP JUST MADE ME FEEL SO MUCH#i am far from an artist but i really really like thinking about possible intentional art direction n stuff#am i good at it? hell no! this stuff was probably obvious! and/or unintentional! but it was fun :3#i went so insane abt this that while i was driving today i realized i was thinking more abt this ch than actually FOCUSING ON THE ROAD.#also super sorry for the late ep post! i was busy today <- was brainrotting abt this exact ep LMAO#very very sorry if this is all stuff webnovel readers know already from reading it! mb mb#man lots of apologies in the tags today lol sorry ill post now
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One rule
pairing: sub!nate x sls!reader
summary 1: you and your triplet older brothers (nick matt and chris) have always been close, they have always respected your wishes and let you do what you want as you were an adult now. but they had one rule. dont. fuck. their. best. friend. but rules were never ment to be followed…
summary 2: it was finally your birthday, the day you have been wating for, your finally 21!! your older siblings throw a party for you constantly reminding you of their one rule. dont have sex with their best friend, nathan doe.
A/N: this is my first fan fic ever so if it suck im sorry.😭 and sorry for the 2 summarys i couldnt chose one bc they both are good😭 this will be 2-3 parts depending on the ending looks like for this fic
warnings: SMUTTTT, cursing, getting caught, crying, physical fighting, panic attack, mentions of alcohol, and probably more
"Y/N HURRY UP!" you hear your eldest brother nick call up to you as you finish up your no make up make up look. "IM COMING JEEZ NICK BEING A GIRL IS HARD Y'KNOW!" you scoff as you say that, putting your shoes on running down stairs where your 3 brothers wait looking at their phones.
"ahem im here lets gooooo" you cough out as they all look up at you and start walking "took you long enough.." chris mumbles earning a smack on the arm from you.
-
about twenty minutes later you arrive at the airport to pick up 2 of your best friends, madi and nate. you've had the biggest crush on nate since as long as you can remember but you have never told anyone but madi. when you finally see the two emerge from the crowds at the airport you run up to them.
"MADI! NATE! AHHHH!!!" you scream as you wrap your arms around both their necks for about 30 seconds before you pull back and look both of them in the eye
"well hello to you too then" nate laughs "hi Y/n/n!!! its been so long" madi says picking up the bag she dropped from seeing you and loading it into the back of the mini van. nate does the same stacking his bag on top of madi's and putting his backpack on top.
you all start to pile into the mini van after small talk but slowly realizing there wont be enough room for the four of you to fit in the back. "shit where am i gonna sit?" you say looking at matt who is sitting in the front seat waiting as everyone buckles up but you. he shrugs when you hear nate say "sit on my lap itll be fine." you look up at him with an eye brow cocked up.
"no ill be to heavy. ill sit on the floor its fine!" you say starting to crawl into the vans floor "no y/n thats dangerous. just sit on my lap ill live you weigh practically nothing!" nate says as you roll your eyes and finally agree to this decision, as you close the door. you wiggle around on nates lap to make yourself comfortable. you hear him grunt as you finally find a comfortable position and lean back in his chest.
"whats wrong, am i too heavy?" you ask looking back at nate. "no your fine just getting myself comfortable too!" he says smiling his warm smile at you as matt hits a speed bump making nate grunt again but this time you ignore it leaning back on nate's chest and slowly falling asleep to the sound of small chatter floating around the car.
-
when you wake up you find a sleeping madi and you in new clothes with no make up. madi must have changed you and taken off your make up after you fell asleep in the car. you get up and go downstairs checking the time on your phone 11:37 PM you read as you groaned rubbing your eyes as you make your way to the kitchen already seeing a light on. you walk into the kitchen to find a snacking nate at the island, you giggle as you walk over to your fridge and grab a small yogurt cup.
"hello sleepy head" nate says looking at you through his lashes as he takes a bite from the cereal bowl in-front of him. you walk over and sit next time him setting your yogurt and spoon down as you look into his eyes "hello pretty boy" you whisper, a smirk threatening to spread across your face as you see his eyes widen from the nickname he hasn't heard you use in months.
"ive missed you y/n.." he says as he looks at your lips then back to your eyes, you doing the same. "ive missed you too nate" you smile at him and you jsyt stare into each others eye before the buzz of your phone breaks the trance. its nick. you groan opening the message.
from : nicky pooh 11:41 why are you up i see the kitchen like on
you laugh as you type a response
to : nicky pooh 11:41 i got hungry, snacking with nate. sorry to wake you we'll be in bed soon promise
from: nicky pooh 11:42 fine, make it quick im tired and that light is bright shining through my door. love u 🫶🏼
to : nicky pooh 11:43 lol sucks to have a broken door dont it, love u to🫶🏼
"sorry about that." you chuckle putting the phone down and looking back at nate who looks like his eyes never left your face. you turn to open ur yogurt are you are actually hungry, making nate do the same to finish off his cereal as you devour the yogurt in 6 big spoon fulls. you both get up at the same time him making his way to the sink and you to the trash, he puts his bowl and spoon in the sink as you throw away the yogurt container and walk over the nate leaning on the sink.
you lean really close to nate looking up at him slightly as you place your spoon in the sink. your stomach slightly grinding against his crotch making him groan. you lightly gasp as you feel his growing hard-on press into your stomach. you back up taking nates hand and dragging him to the guest room where he will be staying making sure to close and lock the door as you walk over to the boy pushing him down on the bed as you climb onto him so your straddling him
"fuck y/n what a-are you d-doing?" he asks worried about nick matt and chris. you can see it in his face thats what hes scared about. "im doing what you clearly want." you say palming his growing erection getting a loud whimper from nate. you push a hand over his mouth. "shhhh we dont want my brothers or madi to hear do we now?" you say earning a frantic head shake from nate as you begin to fiddle with the waist band of his pajamas pants soon after pulling them down as he starts to take your top of leaving you in your bra before you hear a small knock at the door startiling you both as you quickly pull your top back on and him pulling up his pants as you both stand up.
"yo nate!" chris says before he jiggles the locked handle. "whys the door locked? bro let me in!" chris says jiggling the door more as you run and hide behind the desk thats set up in the corner of the room.
"sorry forgot to unlock it after i got changed earlier, whats up?" nate says before looking over at you quickly and back to chris. "me and matt are going on a late night drive you coming? im asking y/n and madi after you." chris says, nate eyes widen. "s-sure uh i can ask the girls if you want to head downstairs, i need to piss anyway." nate says looking over at you again for a second then looking back at your brother
"alrights sounds cool, see you downstairs soon?" chris says walking away and pointing at nate "you got it!" nate says as he slightly closes the door and looks at you. "you down to go for a drive?"nate says pointing at the door "fuck yea i am!" you say standing up running to your room slowly opening the door to see a dead asleep madi "i guess madis not coming!" you say pulling on a hoodie and changing your shorts into long pajama pants.
"fine by me" nate responds walking out the room and down the steps as you follow close behind. after you guys drove around for awhile you went back home and all parted ways to you room. seeing as you had to get stuff ready for tomorrow, your big birthday party!
a/n reallllyyyyy long first chapter so sorry but next will be shorter ish and better i promise! i was also crying at myself while writing this it was so bad so hope you enjoyed😭😭
tags: @k4tixzz @hysteria-things @lovingmattysposts
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