#so if she acts even a little different in a way i interpret as negative after showing her...
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h0estar · 2 days ago
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with the people i've seen crying on reddit, tiktok, and tumblr about how jinshi was nothing but forceful with maomao in the last episode (because apparently she didn't reciprocate and her passivity is not an excuse), i might just wish for this anime sequel to be a movie skipping the rest of the novels and jumping straight to the WC part 2 so they can get the truth shoved in their faces and see maomao kissing jinshi WHILE HE WAS ASLEEP in 4K and god-tier animation. maybe they can cry about that instead.
i honestly try not to let it get to me because i understand that this anime is a first for some people in the fandom. some have never interacted with anime before this series, they did not grow up watching it, and worst of all, they've never touched a LN or a BOOK in their lives. so interpretations can get a little skewed, especially if the readers are from the west (and they bring their modern-day western morals, values, and projection onto their interpretation). but damn, it really gets to a point.
i really try my best to keep my rants to myself as it doesn't benefit anyone, and i'm not a fan of negativity. still, since the show already ended, i might as well.
i know everyone interprets things differently, we all come from different backgrounds, culture, etc., and that's okay!!! it should be okay!!! people are allowed to feel uncomfortable with the scenes that i personally found to be non-issues (though i have to admit this is skill issue and oversensitivity on their part—but that's just me lacking empathy and being a bitch).
i mean, it's normal for the fans to project themselves on their favorite characters. still, when that becomes too much and they essentially strip said characters of what makes them who they are, or rather, who the author intended them to be, they end up disappointed, hurt, and offended on the character's behalf. as a result, unpleasant words get thrown around, which is concerning because the use of strong words like rapist, pedophile, and groomers, have become so common in fandom spaces that i fear it waters down the heaviness of what those words actually mean irl. but we're not talking about that.
it's okay to project yourself into characters. still, it shouldn't come as a shock to you when said character acts differently from you. this also happened in the novels with ah duo and joka, who both projected themselves onto maomao and are shocked when maomao does something different from what they imagined she'd do. that made them feel bad and reflect on themselves.
back to the final episode, how can you say maomao is not reciprocating when we clearly saw how she treated jinshi in the carriage? did we really not see the moments maomao initiated physical contact? closing the space between them despite jinshi backing off, only so she could take off his bandage and look at his scar? and the way she snatched the bandage from jinshi so she could be the one to wrap it around his face instead? did we all choose to ignore that...
she only put her guard back up when jinshi came on to her strongly. remember how she's always portrayed as a cat? cats warm up to you when you take it slow and steady with them. jinshi was doing so well, but her comment about his looks and value made his emotions skyrocket to the heavens, enough for him to desperately want to kiss her. because of that, she backed off.
but okay, let's ignore how she didn't pull her hand away as he pulled her to lie beside him. how she just stayed there as they exchanged banter. how she reacted when jinshi touched her neck. how she literally reached for his cheek and told him that his scar looks good on him and makes him look more manly and handsome than ever. mind you, she did this after jinshi poured out his insecurity. the way she didn't push him away even as he bit her. how she caressed his cheek and didn't pull away when jinshi lifted her chin. and how she smiled at him in exasperation when chou-u appeared and asked her about him. how she still went back and knelt in front of him to tell him to rest. how she just stayed there when jinshi was lying on her lap (even tho she knew he was only pretending to be asleep at first). and sure, let's also ignore the softness in her voice the whole time they were talking, the way she still acted like his friend even as he stands (or sits) before her as a member of the royal family. she keeps her promises, and to her, he will always be jinshi.
S1 / LN 1 maomao would never. still, even in S1 we see her touch his face a few times, but there's clearly a Huge Leap here this time, and it's just appalling that people don't see that 😭
now this is only my interpretation, but at this point, maomao was just rescued by her knight in shining armor, which, btw, she thought would never happen because she sees herself as worthless and that no one in their right mind would ever come to save her. but then we have jinshi, who not only led the front lines but gained a scar in the process, and she doesn't know how to feel about that.
so maybe the least she could do for him at the moment was reciprocate in the little ways she knew how: telling him to stop putting himself in harm's way, telling him to rest, closing the space between them and reaching for his cheek, wrapping the bandage on his face, never letting go of his hand, lying down next to him, and telling him that she sees him. that what's inside is more valuable than who he is on the outside, and that what people may consider an imperfection is what actually elevates his beauty even more. she sees his essence underneath all his beauty, which was the final straw for jinshi.
and for once, look at it from jinshi's pov, especially in the shop's scene. as he slid closer to bite her, she didn't push him away, but instead whacked his back as he full-on chomped. and after he embraced her, she caressed his cheek. notice how his eyes were smiling as she did so. he has no idea what's going on in maomao's mind, and he only has her actions to take as signs. this is the first of many times they use their actions to convey feelings and play mind games to figure out what it all means, rather than just outright using words. ah, the pain of brilliant and prideful characters clashing in tales of love.
the two of them were doing so well at that point, and i'm glad the next scene came off as silly rather than uncomfortable. but at the end of the day, we must remember that these two idiots are still angsty teenagers. they're navigating all these unfamiliar feelings for the first time and trying to get to know each other in the process. miscommunication is their best friend, but thankfully, 12 more volumes in the story flesh out their progress.
if you don't like the romance but enjoy the story, just ignore their moments. suppose you're only here for the romance and think jinshi is problematic and not right for maomao. in that case, you can stick to your boring shoujo male leads who can do no harm and whose only personality is kissing the ground the FL walks on. anyway, this will be my only knh-related rant, so feel free to ignore, disagree, agree, add, subtract, or whatever. i just wanted to let this out in the open because it can get frustrating.
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dandyshucks · 1 year ago
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once again trying to decide if i should show counselor/therapist my selfship art bc she asks to see any art I've made that i want to show her each session fjfkdl ,,,, i probably won't because I'm still terrified of being judged for it but mannnnn that rly has been almost all I've made these past two months ( ╥ω╥ )
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yumeka-sxf · 9 months ago
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Are we finally heading into the long awaited Desmond arc? 👀 It's hard to say yet, but my first thought upon reading the new chapter was that, like, 9 out of the 23 pages was just awkward silence at the dinner table 😬
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Another thing that stood out to me within the first few panels was how different Damian seems at home than at school.
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When he's rejected and inconvenienced by Demetrius and Max respectively, he keeps calm and doesn't get mad. On the contrary, he's very understanding and considerate. It's quite different from how he acts in similar situations at school where he's quick to lash out, especially at Anya of course. I'd like to think that what we're seeing in this chapter is more of the "real" Damian; a basically nice kid who longs for a normal childhood with a normal family, but unfortunately was born into the opposite...and because he's not free to openly express his frustration about this due to how uptight and estranged his parents are, he lets out a lot of his negative emotions at school instead. Anya is often the brunt of this due to how often she tries to interact with him in ways that he's not used to.
But anyway, back to the chapter itself, we're also introduced to a new butler at the Desmond house, Mary Jane.
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Not sure how prominent of a character she'll be, but the fact that Endo gave her a name (which he doesn't always give to reoccurring characters) makes me think we'll see her again.
We also finally get to see Max and Damian interact. Despite being a German shepherd (I think), I like that Endo made him look distinct from Aaron. Though it seems like he has longish fur...maybe he's a mixed breed? Endo provided this cute illustration along with the chapter release too.
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Among all the "Desmond family being awkward at dinner" panels we got, the one that stood out the most to me (and probably others) was this two-page spread.
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Showing all of them in separate corners against total darkness, each seemingly in their own little world not looking at any of the others. This is very contrasting to how the Forger family meals are conveyed...
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It really makes you wonder - which is the fake family and which is the real family?
A more subtle thing to note about the Desmond dinner is that Melinda never actually eats anything. Throughout all the panels, she's only seen drinking wine and never using her silverware. When she leaves, her plate hasn't been touched.
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What I interpret from this based on what we know so far is that she has such an aversion to the Desmond house, and probably Donavan in particular, that she can't even bring herself to eat in his presence.
And lastly, I wanted to touch on the word that Donovan uses when describing the family dinner. In the Japanese version, he uses the word 有意義な which means "significant," "valuable," "useful," "of interest," etc.
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I got the impression that Damian doesn't know what that word means, which is why it's written in katakana when he asks Jeeves. He says "Hey Jeeves, what's ユーイギ?"
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The English version makes it seem like he knows what the word "worthwhile" means, but not what Donovan meant by it in this situation, so slightly different nuance between the two versions.
That about wraps up my thoughts on the new chapter! Like I said in the beginning, I think it could be leading to a new arc focused on the Desmonds, or it could simply be a standalone chapter, and we'll focus on something else next time. Gotta wait and see~
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astrolook · 2 months ago
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🔆🌞💍Sun As Darakaraka - The Heart Wants What It Already Admires🔆🌞💍
Note: These are just my personal observations and recurring patterns I've noticed over the years from married clients, relatives and friends. Take what resonates with you and leave the rest. Feel free to share in the comments if any of this hits home. This post is based on Vedic astrology.
DK: The planet with the lowest degree in your birth chart that holds your deepest desires for a partner like your soul's "Wanted Ad" scribbled in cosmic ink. It shows the kind of spouse you attract and what your heart secretly craves in relationships.
Sun as DK:
Your partner might just be your twin with a twist.
When the Sun is your Darakaraka, your partner tends to be a lot like you on the outside. Same hobbies, same taste in food, same style or at least similar energy. It’s like they mirror parts of your personality but the way it shows up really depends on what house the Sun is in.
Sun in the 1st house will act super different from Sun in the 12th so it’s not one size fits all.
In general though, Sun as DK means your partner probably takes the lead in the relationship. They might be the one making decisions, handling money or just the one who rules the roost. It can feel like they’re the boss of the relationship sometimes in a good way or not so good depending.
If the Sun has tough aspects like with Saturn or Mars, things can get a little tricky. You might deal with ego clashes, arguments or a partner who’s a bit too controlling. They’ll definitely bring light and energy into your life but too much Sun can burn.
If the Sun’s in a good house or has gentle aspects, most of this softens up and things feel way more balanced.
Real-life patterns I've noticed with people who has Sun as DK
Just because the Sun is your Darakaraka doesn’t mean your marriage will be full of ego clashes or power struggles. It really depends on where the Sun is placed, which sign it’s in, and what aspects it’s making. I’ve seen this in the charts of clients, friends, and even relatives. I always take notes when I read charts, especially to track long-term relationship patterns. Astrology isn’t one-size-fits-all, and I strongly disagree with interpretations that try to make it that way.
Sometimes I see astrologers online sharing overly negative takes that can honestly scare people. That kind of thinking can turn into a self-fulfilling prophecy, and that’s not what astrology should be about. Even my posts about spouse appearance and personality traits are based on general patterns and can shift depending on aspects, signs, and other chart factors.
So today, I wanted to share a few real-life examples to show how Sun as Darakaraka can play out in different ways , not all doom and gloom, and definitely not all the same.
1. Wife with Sun as DK in 12th house Leo Sun was with the North Node and 1st lord Mercury. Her husband is a foreigner and older than her(Saturn rx in 7th). She’s the dominant one in the relationship and earns more than him. She’s the main provider while he’s a stay-at-home dad who takes care of the kids and his career took a backseat after marrying her. Both are super private and share some oddly similar features like a small dorsal hump on their noses, apple-shaped faces, chubby hands, and short wide nails. It’s like a mirrored energy in the way they look and live.
2. Husband with Sun as DK in 8th house Gemini Sun in 8th house Gemini was aspecting Jupiter in the 2nd house. He was married for 21 years but eventually divorced. His wife cheated on him three times. He stayed for the sake of their son but left when their son turned 19. The wife was the dominant one and emotionally abusive. Whenever he asked her anything, she flipped it on him and accused him of cheating. They were both really tall and shared the same grey eyes(some even mistook them for siblings). Both had weak eyesight and wore glasses from a young age.
3. Husband with Sun as DK in 5th house Taurus He was dominant in the relationship and treated his wife like a doormat. They had three kids back to back within five years. They’re still married after 11 years but the wife has major health issues from having three C-sections in such a short time. She told me and my mom that she’s just living for her kids now because she has no way out. He pays for everything and she feels stuck. Both of them have similar crooked teeth right in the middle and both of them likes spicy food.
4. Wife with Sun as DK in 11th house Aquarius Sun in 11th conjunct Venus and Mercury and sextile Mars. She’s been married for five years. Her husband is a foreigner. They’re both athletic types, physically strong, and love working out together. They co-own a gym and also volunteer at animal rescues. They have twins. Even though they’re from different racial backgrounds, the way they smile is super similar. It’s wild how certain expressions and energies can look alike even when people look totally different.
5. Elderly woman in her 70's with Sun as DK in 6th house Pisces Sun was conjunct Jupiter and aspecting Saturn. Her husband was 13 years older. They had three kids and were married for 38 years before he passed away from internal bleeding in his brain. He was super supportive and even back in the 80s, he helped her build her career and both of them worked. He left an inheritance for her and their kids. She was much shorter than him and they looked different physically. But when I asked her some questions to gain more info, I learned they shared the same food allergy to eggplants, both developed diabetes in their 30s, and both dealt with athlete’s foot. Those little shared details stuck with me.
So again, just having Sun as your Darakaraka doesn’t mean you’ll automatically have ego problems or a dominating spouse. The sign, house, and aspects all shape how that energy shows up. These stories aren’t here to scare anyone. I just want to show the wide range of possibilities that exist like from supportive partners to more difficult patterns and everything in between.
Astrology is a tool, not a sentence. It’s here to help us understand patterns and prepare better, not to box us in. Every chart is unique, just like every relationship. And that’s kind of beautiful, don’t you think?
My next post will be about Moon as Darakaraka. Am collecting patterns and my personal experiences from my notes to post and will be out soon!
Wanna go deeper into the layers of your placements? DM me for a complete astrology reading or a 5 year/8 year marriage report or synastry reading🌙💬 and check out my pinned post for pricing + details 💫💸
Let’s decode your cosmic chaos together ⭐
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zeroiridium · 4 days ago
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Underlying misogyny in the Mega Man X fandom
Maybe I'm coming across as "too woke" here or reading into things too much, but I'd like to talk about the misogyny surrounding the mmx fandom as I feel it's an overlooked issue .
My first example is the treatment Iris gets in the fandom.
Ignoring the blatant sexualisation she's gotten over the years, Iris is either forgotten (which I don't fully blame people for actually), treated decently or hated and bashed for.......kinda nothing honestly
You see, Iris suffers from this thing called "treating writing flaws like character flaws." A.K.A. hating characters for what is clearly an out-of-universe problem.
The most common example is that characters (usually female) are poorly written, and fans of the media hate the characters for it. It's made even worse when male characters suffer from the same writing mistakes and get little to no negativity.
You can probably see how this relates to mmx. Iris is very much not a well written character. She barely has a role other than "extra trauma for Zero boo hoo," but then again, X and Zero ALSO aren't well written. They just seem better because you see more of them, but truthfully, you only need a maximum of three words to describe any of these characters as they're all shallow.
Fandom misogyny also applies to other female characters, especially in the oversexualisation or complete ignorance department. Another great example of this would be Layer.
In-game Layer is a reserved, calm, collected woman who only really breaks out of that when Zero is around, in which she seems to get awkward, no doubt due to her hinted crush at the man. Even then, she doesn't act all that different. She almost has Garnet energy to her.
In a lot of fanon interpretations though, Layer seems to be sexualised and even demonised despite her barely contributing to the games. Granted colourisim also plays a part in that, not only in fanon content but in canon media as well. Layer is the only black character in the X series, and she is by far the most sexualised, which also contributes to her fanon depictions.
Another character I'll mention in relation to underlying misogyny in the fandom is one you might not expect.
It's X.
Yeah
X suffers from this thing in male characters especially, benevolance, a desire for peace a dislike of violence, or any indication of emotions really, are seen as weak, soft, or you guessed it, feminine traits.
These types of characters are then often infantilised, fetishised, and generally misrepresented in fan made media.
(It's at this point I would like to state there is nothing wrong with soft or weak or feminine male characters on their own.)
X very much suffers from this, as despite fighting several wars, people still portray him as a wimp. Even in the Zero games, which is honestly kinda absurd to me? Seriously, a man who ran an apocalyptic nation for a century would not act the way some people seem to think.
Speaking of the Zero games, this post is about mmx so I'll keep this brief, but there's also a lot of weird stuff when it comes to female characters in that fandom aswell, mostly sexualisation. For Fairy Leviathan, even though I don't like it and think it sucks, I can at least somewhat understand it. She does seem to have the maturity of a young adult and is almost flirtatious in her appearances. However, I can not say the same about certain depictions of Ciel, who is a confirmed CHILD. She's 14 in mmz 1, and she's 16 in mmz 4. No excuses.
Well we've come to the end of this rant where I'd like to say that there is nothing inherently wrong with OOC depictions of characters. People are allowed to have fun and play around with characters they enjoy. That's not at all my problem.
My problem is when fanon is treated like canon, to the point where fan made content is treated as official information, which ofc leads to a lot of confusion and misunderstandings, and it's honestly just plain annoying. Especially since a massive part of megaman series fans haven't actually run through the canon material
There's also problematic aspects like misogyny, racism and others, which I mentioned previously. To anyone with half a brain, it should be obvious why those are bad things.
Anyway I saulte for making it the end of this, thank you for listening to my ultimately not that clear way of presenting topics
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justaladyiguess · 17 days ago
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A slightly more believable TADC theory
Like the last one, take everything I say with a grain of salt. I’m just a lady watching a show.
One scene that stuck out to me in the new TADC episode was when Jax seemed to genuinely think that Gangle likes it when he's mean to her.
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At first glance, it seems pretty counter-intuitive. Why would he think being mean to someone will cheer them up? But I think this whole episode casts a bit of light on his perspective.
There are a lot of indicators that Jax has some concern for the others. The aforementioned exchange is one of them. Then, in the bar, Jax makes the jab at Kinger right after Ragatha talks about her history with her mom.
This one could be read in a few different ways, but I see it as him trying to distract from the somber tones in her story. Especially considering this expression moments before.
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And then he apologizes to Pomni about the president thing, something even Pomni thinks is odd. Granted, he does it in a semi joking way, but there does seem to be some sincerity behind it.
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If you’re a bit delusional, you could interpret later actions as this as well. When Ragatha blows up at Pomni and apologizes, he jokingly asks for an apology. But then seems surprised that he got one. It’s possible he was intentionally trying to distract from the semi-harsh thing she said before.
And finally, while the Poacher's Paradise is pretty self-indulgent, the President Pomni adventure seems like a surprisingly genuine attempt to make a fun adventure. Everyone gets a character sheet and everything. Minus Pomni, but still.
But if he does care, why does he act like… Jax?
I think it’s for the same reason Ragatha tries to keep things positive.
Some people try to solve things directly. They talk to people about issues. Pomni usually does this, but that’s a post for another day.
Ragatha and Jax try similar approaches on the opposite ends of the spectrum. Ragatha tries to lift everyone's spirits by keeping them positive and avoiding the negative. But I think Jax tries to lift everyone's spirits by trying to keep anything from being serious. After all, if none of it matters, nobody gets upset. Either way, nobody is confronting the actual issues at play.
To get a little personal here, it reminded me a bit of myself. Sometimes I find myself acting like Ragatha. Trying to find the good side so everyone else can see it too. But most of the time it's just easier to joke around. It's a band aid solution, sure. But it lightens the atmosphere. Seems to make things better. Granted, I usually don't do it by insulting the people I'm trying to cheer up, but still.
In Jax's mind, the reason everyone is so miserable is because they take it too seriously. He says it himself multiple times. Granted, he's a bit of a hypocrite in this respect. He can take insults and banter, but being humiliated in any way tends to send him off the edge. But even Ragatha seems to be acutely aware that her up beat attitude hasn't done much to keep her happy.
Their similarities are further enhanced by the scene on the bench.
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Their back and forth strongly implies that their motivations and facades are similar. While both assume the other has negative intentions, I don’t think either of them do.
I do think he’s partly a jerk who gets pleasure out of making fun of others. And his philosophy of not caring is probably mostly to protect himself from negative emotions. He’s certainly not a saint.
But I think it’s possible that he’s got dual motivations. That he thinks everyone would be better off if they stopped trying to be happy and just started doing what he does.
Not taking anything seriously.
But that’s just a theory.. a Digital Circus Theory! And cut..
And yes, I did get the idea from that “Funny Things” fan song by RecD.
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goomyloid · 2 months ago
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I think a lot about a version of the pacifist route Spamton fight where Kris goes down there with just Noelle instead and has the same post-battle freak out and Noelle being the one to notice/ask if they’re okay. And how she would react to the strained Yes vs yelled No. Especially knowing how she's so determined to figure out what's up with Kris in the weird route, I think it's interesting if she has the same attention to detail and desire to understand what's happening to Kris in the pacifist route.
ok my jaw kinda dropped open reading this. i have honestly never thought of this before and now im going Crazy. oh my gourd i reeeeeally hope someday in the future we get to face a secret boss with noelle…. it would be so awesomes
there is a real difference between how kris acts around noelle vs. how they act around ralsei and susie… because the latter two are ‘newer’ friends with less complicated history i feel as though they’re more straightforward and open around them in a sense. like theyre Able to bring themself to yell NO because they know in the back of their head that both susie and ralsei will try to comfort kris in their own ways. along with that, i guess it’s because of susie’s insistence on finding out if kris is okay or not that they managed to ask them if they were ok at all. basically, its multiple cases of less people holding back on various things…
i personally imagine it being kind of different for noelle. she Thinks a lot of things without actually saying them. she probably wouldn’t stop everything to question that just happened with spamton neo, and if she were to ask kris if they were ok, it would be more based on a gut feeling that something is really wrong more than anything else, if that makes sense… the way kris is friends with noelle is different than how they’re friends with susie. theyre almost less straightforward with noelle, with their idea of bonding being silly pranks and messing with her (stuff kris wouldnt do to susie lol). i wonder if they’d be able to be honest about how they felt like how they were with susie and ralsei, or if it’d turn into them hiding how they feel even more… (something something It’s hard for noelle to get a straightforward answer from kris in general)
noelle being concerned about what’s “happening” to kris in the main route feels difficult, maybe just because it’s so amplified negatively in the weird route, but at this point in time, most people seem to be interpreting kris’s more social behavior as a good thing… when something actually appears to be Wrong for the first time (kris freaking out after spamton neo), susie has no good benchmark of what kris was really like before, and ralsei is being Ralsei-ish about it… if kris were to have the same reaction in front of noelle after all, i think it would deeply disturb her way more than any other character. personally i just dont think kris is the Yelling Type, like at all, so for noelle to hear that from them for the first time (or maybe she’s heard kris yell before in a really bad situation, which then might let her know just how Bad this all is) it would probably really surprise her, and kris would probably regret shouting as a result… not a funny prank
just in general i think kris has a weird combination of like, wanting someone to Notice that something’s different, but also pushing people away out of fear and desire for solitude (and again this applies more so to noelle specifically). like in the main route, it might be easier to believe that things working out for everyone this way is just Better, no one else needs to worry about the Weird Fucking Thing controlling them, they can handle this on their own… until they cant. general desire to not burden others if at all possible. ALL OF THIS IS TO SAY noelle would Really have to lock in and pry at kris a little bit in order to find out that they are “not them” because in the main route where things Aren’t bad, that desperation from the soul doing fuck all in the weird route isnt there anymore
ok im gonna end the post here… your scenario activated a lot of neurons i never even knew i had
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yannaryartside · 1 year ago
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CARMY NEVER WANTED TO CREATE A MENU WITH SYD.
AND WHY THAT IS THE CORE THEME OF THE SHOW
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PART 1: THE LIE THAT CARMY BELIEVES
So, one of the bases of creating an efficient character arc is to give the character something they want, and something they need. In the pursuit of getting what they want, the theme of the show and obstacles will show them what they need. Most of the time, they need healing from an emotional wound that prevents them from growing into the ultimate version of themselves, capable of winning the challenges of the story. I will try to explore Carmy's wound and, more importantly, the lie that created that wound.
In 'The negative trait thesaurus" by Angela Ackerman and Becca Puglisi, it reads:
"Wounds are often kept secret from others because embedded within them is the lie-an untruth that the character believes about himself."
When I started therapy (disclaimer: this is not professional advice; I am just talking from how I interpreted all of this), I was introduced to the concept of "limiting beliefs:" lies we have told ourselves about our own nature or the nature of the world. The most difficult beliefs to leave behind are those established in our early childhoods, and we told ourselves those lies to make sense of the world, to make peace with realities we were not equipped to comprehend yet. 
Some examples of lies people belive:
"I am too stupid to learn anything; my teacher said so" "It was my fault that I was molested." "I am a bad person for wanting a different life."
When people believe these lies, they will act accordingly, maybe attracting situations that hurt them but keeping the lie active in their lives. They may self-sabotage or create bonds with people who also believe the lie, even if it doesn't seem this way. 
In some cases, people may develop complete personalities or behaviors to prove the lie wrong, but deep down, they still believe in the lie. Carmy falls into this last category. This is where we find the most contradictory parts of his personality, how he can act shy and insecure in some instances and appear confident and even aggressive in others. 
Long post underneath.
THE RESENT OF A MOTHER:
We can only assume here because I think Storer is gonna let us know more about this soon, but I think I got an idea of this wound when I saw the only moment Carmy was alone with Donna on "Fishes."
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I have a lot of things to say about Donna herself, but let's begin with the obvious: the conversation in this scene had little to do with the dinner itself. This was a woman stating that she felt alone and not valued, probably due to being abandoned by her husband and having to overwork herself at the beef to support her 3 kids, all while being a single mother. We don't know if this feeling of abandonment is something she has carried since childhood, but in the state of current womanhood, it wouldn't be uncommon. The work of women (especially mothers), particularly the emotional labor, is rather invisible and not valued at all.
But again, this is something she has used as fuel to resent her kids, who, at the end of the day, didn't ask to be here. Her anger has to go somewhere since she cannot direct it toward the people that ctually caused it. To get to the point:
THE BEARZATTO SYBLING DYNAMIC
Carmy said, "You are not alone; I am here with you." (This kind of comes back to telling Syd she was not alone at the end of the season.) This scene is about a kid trying to communicate to his mother that he loves her and trying desperately to connect with her, to get her to express her affection for him as well.
It tells me that growing up, he felt like he had to "earn" her affection. Donna likes to make her kids feel guilty about her unhappiness, so the kids feel that they are constantly walking on shells because they think their mother hates them, or at least that she resents them and that it is their responsibility to fix it.
In the scene, Carmy asked,
"What is so hard, Mom?"
I think what he was actually asking is, "What is so hard about being with us, to love us? What did we do to you that made you resent us this way?" He is asking because he wants to know, to finally understand. Why do you drink, Mom? Why do you yell? Why do you say such hurtful things?
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When she answers, "Nobody makes things beautiful for me," you can see in his face the disconnection. He knows he can't do anything about that.
Then, a crucial part in the scene occurs when Donna calls him "Michael, " which indicates that the only one of her children who could make her feel happy was Michael, or at least that is how the other two kids felt. You can see the hurt in Carmy's eyes in the scene because this answer dismisses his effort to connect to his mother in his own right. She asks him to just leave. He offers to wait to connect with her. Then, it comes to the most chilling moment on the scene, the "we have a problem" using his full name, with resentment in every word. She hugs him while crying, kisses him, and then slaps him.
This is rejection. There is a book called "The Five Wounds of the Soul": wich are Rejection, Abandonment, Humiliation, Betrayal, and Injustice. I think Carmy's wound is rejection, for never earning his mother's love, particularly comparing himself to Michael.
Michael took responsibility for the Beef, finally giving their mom a break. It was Michael's job to make sure everyone was having a good time, to compensate for the discomfort that caused being in Donna's presence, to make sure all of them stayed as a family, which was Donna's intention, so Michael thought he had to make that happen for her. Therefore, Michael is the only one of her kids who succeeds and makes her happy. We know Donna rejects Natalie and Carmy. About Natalie, we can write another whole essay.
THE LIE THAT CARMY BELIVES
According to this scene, I think Carmy thinks that her mother didn't love him because he is not Michael; in fact, he is the most "not like Michael" someone could be. He was shy and stuttered and didn't have friends or girlfriends, comparable to Michael's ability to control every room he was in. Carmy was sensible and no macho alfa as Michael presented himself to be. Carmy left home and the family business, and both Michael and Donna expressed that they feel like he thinks he is better than them. Michael admitted later to admiring Carmy's work in Copenhagen, but Donna never did. carmy grew up having to live with the crumbles of Donna's attention that Michael left behind, wondering every day what was so wrong with him that made her reject him, and wondering what he could do to change that.
The lie that Carmy belives, could be sumarize this way:
I need to earn people's love. I need to always go the extra mile, doing the most possible at all times to earn people's love.
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This all goes back to his trauma with Michael. It goes back to his career as a chef and how he became the best. He didn't need to succeed on a larger scale in the culinary industry to earn Michael's respect and love; he needed to be the best in the world, so he did that. He judges his own social abilities, comparing them to Miachae's. He left that promising career only because of Michae's death. He got the girlfriend Michael wanted for him (not saying it was the only reason, but it was there).
PART 2: WHAT DOES ALL OF THIS HAD TO DO WITH SYDNEY?
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Well, what does a person who feels they always need to do the most? They do the most. I want to bring you back to the moments Carmy had to develop menu ideas with Syd on s1 and s2.
When Syd suggested items for the menu in s1, he gave her an inconclusive, not enthusiastic "maybe."
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When she had to actually cook the thing for him to approve, he tried to make her feel small about it. He felt the need to remind her that she was "impatient and green," according to her previous bosses. He commented about her possibly ruining the flow by using time to cook her recipe. Yikes all around, but the core here is that he was treating her like an enemy, like competition, while she was trying to save the restaurant with what they had on hand to use the most efficient solution.
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Then, when Carmy tries the dish and feels stunned by it, he has to make an ambiguous excuse on the fly and just finishes every chance of them using the recipe by saying, "is not ready yet"
And what does he do next? He goes to show the crew a recipe that is extremely complicated for the level they are operating at currently—they said so themselves. I think the recipe is a variation of Donna's butter chicken recipe. To put a nail on that coffin of his intentions to earn her love and approval at the end of it all.
But why does he do all this? Because he needs to be the hero, subconsciously, he is still that small kid begging for acceptance and love; he must go the extra mile. He cannot accept Sydney's help and partnership, because that will take away from him earning what he wants on his own merit.
In S2, he seems unenthusiastic about starting the menu in the first place. Then Claire comes along, and he tries to make it work with Syd and the menu, but I think he subconsciously thanks the universe for not having to go to his core wound. That is what self-sabotage is. That is why he bailed on the food tour with Syd, using such a stupid excuse as helping somebody else move out and never mentioning it again. He never asked her what she liked or what ideas she thought of. For most of the creative process, Syd is alone, working on her own creative crisis. The menu ends up being like two recipes they made in collaboration and then all of his family's traditional recipes. It is two of Syd's recipes and the rest of Carmy's. Then, desserts Marcus did on his own. The collaboration was superficial at best.
All of this creates the core theme of the show. The Bear was once a chaotic place (like their childhood home) that needs to evolve into an efficient, peaceful place built on love, support, and mutual collaboration like a functional family should be. Sydney is the member of this found family that forces Carmy to confront his core wound and learn he can actually be good enough while still accepting help. Therapy probably will play an important part in this theme, alongside with Carmy learning there was nothing wrong with him in the first place, that earning your parent's love is not something a kid can do.
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Thankyou for reading. Gif and images are not mine.
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dammit-tazmuir · 2 months ago
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Some dumb lyctor polycule ancient history headcanons (+ canon interpretation rambling) like five people will care about but still
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John is quoiromantic bisexual and A— was aromantic bisexual. They met earlier, maybe like grad school ("he could have gone anywhere, but he stayed with me"), and became very close affectionate friends with benefits. M— was straight ("was"; Mercy over time shifted to be masc-leaning bi; I'm still sorry I know this is my hottest take) and when she came along as an expert for the cryo project, both the guys went "oh hot damn wow." Then they talked to her for five minutes outside of business and A— went "fucking yikes nevermind" and John went "OH HOT DAMN WOW."
John and M— got closer over time and it was Very Different than his relationship with A—. Not better or worse, but different, which made A— and M— resent each other all the more. John and A— had never wanted to put a label on things, but A— was still pretty jealous and it still felt weird to John to consider dating someone, and listen the communication was messy and not ideal but it did happen, and this led to John and A— reclassifying each other as real "partners" (albeit still platonic ones) around the same time John and M— started dating. (Everyone consenting despite the conflict.)
In A—'s mind, M— was devaluing his relationship with John just because it was platonic and acting like she was better. In M—'s, A— was being a whiny pissbaby to act like he had dibs when he wasn't even in love with the man. Both of them were in fact being petty judgmental bitches who eventually grew to respect the other's bond but always thought of their own attraction style as superior. ("You never loved him as much as I did...") Basically A— was convinced his yellow cake was more pure and simple while M— thought her fancy extra icing vanilla cake showed more effort and devotion and John was over here going !!! TWO CAKES :D
(Un)Fortunately A— and M— were both extremely stubborn and competitive and it wasn't JOHN'S fault the other was insufferable, I mean maybe it was a little bit for having bad taste, but like, they cared very deeply about and wanted to be with him so they weren't gonna push him away, that'd be stupid. And okay MAYBE the other's intellect was at least admirable and it got kind of impressive that neither gave up and maybe they get to a point where they actively enjoy being catty bitches who can consistently match each other's wit. Maybe they start to notice John hates it when they fight "too" much but also really likes it when they fight over him if they do it right, and maybe they've realized through work that they do synergize really well whether they like it or not, and maybe sometimes it's fun to conspire to make him really really flustered.
Maybe John is incredibly endearing as a person and his brilliance and passion for the project and for helping people in general never fails to blow either of them away, and they're both so inspired by him that they'd follow him anywhere, but he is also more devoted to the job than to either of them and not really the most attentive person in a relationship. And maybe they don't mind that but they do like how intensely they can get the other's attention even if it's technically negative and it's exciting and unfortunately the other has always been really attractive and God dammit they're fucking about this aren't they.
They both feel horrible after the first time and expect John to feel betrayed but it's actually super fucking embarrassing how excited he is about it. Like not even in a "maybe now we can do threesomes" way (I mean that's not a NON-factor just not the main one), but because !!! LET'S GO you see it you understand I TOLD both of you the other was great. He'd tease them both so much at first. I'd say fully the vibe of "you like Krabby Patties, don't you Squidward?" but it's John and it was probably just directly that reference at least some of the time.
Also listen he's self-aware enough to realize he's not an ideal partner and whatever they wanna do with each other takes that much more pressure off him so?? this is a win-win all around in his eyes. (Maybe that's not exactly 100% true and in the back of his mind he is just a little paranoid they'll end up only wanting each other and leaving him, but 99.9% of that is stamped out with a bit of time to prove they still care about him. The 0.1% lasts for eternity until the night of the murder but still.)
For a while A— and M— both softened quite a bit, still constantly fought and both adamantly agreed this didn't make them partners, but it got to a point it was like 60% doing a bit. Still a significant amount of very real getting on each other's nerves but they're kinda sadomasochistic about it now, and they also really deeply respect and value each other. Their routine looks ridiculous from the outside but it becomes deeply comfortable to the three of them, and while John still wishes they'd tone it down a little more, overall all three of them reach a point it's difficult to imagine things any other way.
And then the project gets shut down and John made a scapegoat as an excuse to do it. M— breaks down crying, and John goes numb instead even though part of him feels all the worse for not being able to cry with her, but A— does, and they're both determined to stay with John no matter what, and he's so infinitely grateful for them.
(For G— and C— too. C— comes as a surprise to him, and she'd been a lovely person to work with before but skyrockets up his special people list because she stays. G— has been his favorite person in the universe for years and still is, even if A— and M— now share that title with him. Incidentally John would have at any point dated G— in a heartbeat if G— was remotely interested Like That, but he wasn't and that was also fine, it didn't actually make much difference to John as long as he could keep him close in some capacity.)
And then John has magic apparently and shit gets worse and worse and worse and worse and then John watches M—'s best friend shoot herself and in a moment of desperation catches her soul and becomes aware of earth's. And half from the trauma of witnessing that, half from the sheer overload of awareness he's suddenly processing, he walks around mostly dissociated, mechanical, watching people drop like flies and pluck, pluck, plucking each of their souls, idly wondering at how it seems like everyone is fighting because of him yet doesn't even seem to notice him now. And he's so numb, almost watching from outside his body, but then A— and M— are there dragging him behind the table and holding his hands so tight that it pulls him back to himself just a little. A— cries about how John was one of the best things in his whole life, they both were, and M— repeats like a mantra that they're together, they'll go together, at least they're together. A— in a stupid moment tells them both to run and tries to play distraction, but is shot dead. A moment later, M— is dragged out and with her dying breath begs them to please just take John alive, and they shoot her too.
And "this is the part where I hurt you." John fully snaps and acts in fear and desperation as much as rage. He can fix it, he knows he can, he has to, he's sure he can figure out how. He just needs this all to stop, needs everything to stop, needs to make sure this never happens again, needs the bastards responsible to pay. They'll ruin anything they touch no matter where they go and they deserve to die, and if he dies here then who's left with the power to fix anything? He can fix everything, he can, he can, he just needs more power. C— always said he had to choose between salvation and retribution but he doesn't, it's both, the power from their deaths can help him fix it right? It's just so hard to think, the earth itself is screaming and screaming, he needs it to stop, needs everything to stop so he can think and figure out how to fix it.
But actually no in the time it took you to read that last paragraph everything already happened so fast and there are already nukes going off and it's not enough and he's tripping over bodies as he runs outside and falls to the earth and tries to eat it and can't. He's vomiting from grief and exertion and the dirt he's shoveling in his mouth. And he finally realizes he's gonna need a vessel, and in the course of a second thinks if he's doing this to her he should at least make her new form perfect, and his idea of perfect is being 7 years old playing with mum's old dolls.
And then they slip through his grasp anyway, and it's just him, and Alecto, and all these souls he snatched up, and the fear that no one will ever laugh at his jokes again, that if he was wrong about being able to figure out how to put them back together he'll just be stuck like this for eternity.
Thankfully he does! He can Fix It so it's Fine and it Definitely Didn't Matter. It matters so little and he's so totally fine with it and definitely feels he doesn't deserve blame at all but you know let's make sure to erase everyone's memories of what happened just in case. Turns out it requires a new name to have a new life but he can just alter their memories so they believe they've always had those too.
He could alter anything about them, really, could make Augustine and Mercymorn crazy about each other and make them the happiest triad there's ever been... but no, he does not want that, he wants them, as close to what they were as he can make them. He does not like change and this is already so much. At the very least he wants his same friends and partners at his side helping figure out all these changes with him.
And then he fails to account for how much time alone will change them eventually...
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lukolabrainrot · 9 months ago
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Firstly thank you so much for your blog. I appreciate your well considered viewpoint and align strongly with your opinions on the current state of the relationship of our favourite couple.
I have been fascinated recently with the different reactions within the fandom to seemingly small events. When I saw the wallpaper on A’s phone I immediately went to a group I’m part of to watch the inevitable meltdown and spiral. As occurs every time a small thing happens there are immediately very different reactions. Those who have always leant to the more negative side of the speculation immediately double down that A and L are still together and it’s absolutely Luke in the photo. From their perspective they are just being realistic and sensible. I firmly believe everybody is entitled to their opinion even if it differs from my own but I don’t believe this view is anymore realistic than mine.
On the other side (which is the side I’m on BTW) L and A have been broken up since at least the Italy birthday trip, the picture is too unclear to confirm anything and even if it is him it tells us nothing about the current state of their relationship.
I’m not really sure what my question is but I guess it’s more an observation about confirmation bias and how we see what we want to see (myself included). From my perspective there is far more to indicate a split than that they still together. I also believe L&N are currently together.
I’ve made a conscious decision to have fun within the fandom. Fun for me is believing the love we saw between L & N is real and they have acted on that. I fully acknowledge that most of what I believe is based on speculation that can be interpreted many different ways. However it is much more fun for me to interpret things in a positive way rather than focussing on the side characters. At the end of the day the only people who know for sure what their relationship status is are L&N and those who actually know them. So why not have fun in our little corner of the internet with the many crumbs N has given us and cheer them on (quietly without being in their personal SM).
Just one final point that has been bothering me is about the Spain photos. For me amidst all this speculation about A being there, palm trees etc there is one thing I’ve never heard mentioned. If she was there and his post was a Latergram why did he take a photo clearly staged to show he was alone. Why would you go on a holiday with your girlfriend and consciously take a photo indicating you’re alone.
Sorry this ended up longer than I thought it would but again thank you for having a space where we can have fun and escape from the realities of the world for a short while.
Thank you Anon, I appreciate it!!
I TRY to keep this space fun and as light hearted as possible.
And I agree, I think if you look at the FULL picture without hyperfixating on one thing, it appears that L/N are likely together atp... I personally think they have probably been together for months by now (but that is just my opinion from what I have seen).
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winstonsns · 1 year ago
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could i request something about reader who is a curtis sister, about 12 years old, and she’s like suzy bishop from moonrise kingdom? c: (sorry it’s kinda specific)
the gang and child suzy bishop!reader (request)
authors note: i researched about suzy bishop, and my resources said she’s fierce, angsty and has a temper. so basically, that’s what the reader is like, a curtis sister too. i’m sorry i haven’t been posting at good times, i’ve been very occupied with volunteering at my schools graduation and getting ready for the end of the year. this is my longest post so far!! 💗
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includes ponyboy, johnny, soda, darry, dally, two-bit and steve
word count: 3.3k
warnings: cussing, blood, fighting, drinking, depression
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PONYBOY CURTIS
you and your brother, ponyboy were walking home from school, you two saw a blue mustang, knowing it was a couple of socs
the two of you knew what to do in this situation, so you sped up, trying to get to your house quicker
four of the socs jumped out of the car, the driver still driving
two of them grabbed your arms and two grabbed your brother’s, pinning ponyboy to the ground
he started screaming for his brothers, while you stayed quiet, a knife held to ponyboy’s throat
“motherfucker—“ you mumbled, kicking one of the socs in the shin, forcing both of them to let go of you, kneeing one in the dick and punching his face, he fell to his knees in pain
you kicked the one on your left in the stomach, getting a rock nearby and hitting his face with it, blood dripping down the socs face
the socs that were holding down ponyboy looked at you in fear, looking at each other for a brief second, then you glared at them and ran towards them
the ones who were holding you down ran away to the car, and the socs who were with ponyboy ran when you came towards them
all the socs were gone, and the two of you were safe, you looked at your brother with worry, not blinking, however he thought you were mad at him
you grabbed him by the shirt, lifting him up and continued walking
he eventually caught up to you and said, “thanks, sis..” so you nodded and didn’t say anything else
you were hard to read, and he hated that, he never knew if you cared, and sometimes thought of you like how he thought of darry
pony always wondered if darry loved him, and thought of his ‘cold, pale eyes,’ a way he would describe you at times, cold
since you were ponyboys little brother and were close in age, just a two year difference, the two of you naturally became close
you told each other everything, however it could be a problem sometimes since he was more emotional than you, and at times you hardly showed any feelings
even acting cold towards people if they pissed you off for some reason
you had a temper but tried not to yell at anyone you were close to, not wanting to say something you didn’t mean
but you felt a very wide range of emotions, even very extreme ones like getting angry to the point of hurting others
you were insulted easily, so ponyboy always back you up and stand up for you if someone said something rude, or something you interpreted as disrespectful
you showed your care for your brother in little ways, like helping him with his homework or bringing him a glass of water, slipping money into his pocket when going out, etc
ponyboy loved you even though you were hard to reason with, you had strong opinions and wouldn’t back down from them, if he had to say one negative word that described you, he would say ‘stubborn’
but he loves being around you because of how loyal you are, you would always stand up for others if you truly loved them
JOHNNY CADE
you were with johnny in the lot, talking with each other about some funny things that happened with the gang, him giggling while you kept a straight face
even though he was supposed to be ponyboy’s best friend since they were closer in age, he decided to befriend you so you two could become closer, to understand each other more
he always had a sad look in his eyes, while you had a look that made people think you had no purpose in life, but in a ‘nothing’ type of way
so when johnny told you “oh, uh, your classmate came up to me today. i know you probably don’t wanna hear this, but she made up a rumor about you. said you beat up a first grader or something and that you’re a horrible person..” you bet your ass you were furious
johnny looked at you, both of you still walking around the lot, and your eyes were suddenly filled with hate
“hmm..” you mumbled, not saying anything after, your fists clenched in anger
you didn’t say anything, you didn’t want to burst out at him, so you said, “i think i need some quiet.”
he knew you would say this when you were angry, not wanting to be rude and say something you didn’t mean, so he stayed quiet
a few minutes later, you said “thank you for telling me.” and started up another conversation
he always appreciated how you would thank people, you were polite but were willing to be rude if your friends were being bullied
johnny would always try to invite you to hangouts, and you would always accept, he considered you one of the more mature ones of the group even though you were the youngest
whenever he looked at you, your eyes would be filled with nothing, as if your eyes were dead, and if they weren’t, your eyes would be filled with hate
but he knew you were going through much more, you felt more than how other people felt, emotions were heightened but you didn’t show it
johnny realized you cared about him when you beat up a soc, who was nearly suffocating him, putting the soc in a chokehold and taking him off of your friend
pushing the soc onto the ground, you grabbed johnny by the back of his denim jacket and ran
you were smart, smarter than others and you used your head
he loved that about you, you were loyal, the fact that you were so loyal had scared him too, knowing that if he ever did something to piss you off, you could fuck him up
but you wouldn’t, you cared too much
SODAPOP CURTIS
you and soda were at the DX, you decided to hang out there after school because you wanted to do homework there and read
when you saw soda’s ex girlfriend, you glared at her, hatred in your eyes, a cold gaze on her
“soda, you bitch! you’re so fucking terrible, ugly ass whore, you’re a dumbass too!! you, telling people about how i cheated on you?! this is supposed to be between us, dipshit—“ she got cut off because you punched her in the face
no one else was in the shop, so you felt free to do whatever
“y/n, stop! oh wait no one’s here, never mind.” your brother said
you grabbed her by her hair and dragged her out of the DX, telling her, “don’t fucking diss my brother again, i can do more than just punch you.”
she ran away, tears in her eyes, and you walked back into the DX, a blank expression on your face again
soda asked you why you punched her, you replied with, “she was talking shit about you, did you not hear?” an annoyed tone to your voice
he looked at you and said, “oh, yeah… thanks, sis.”
you nodded and didn’t reply, went back to doing your homework
he admired how you were good at school, better than he ever was, and you were younger than ponyboy
he tried to get closer to you emotionally even though you wouldn’t let many people get close, always pushing them away before you could
you felt empty inside, not in a sad way, but in a ‘whatever’ way, still hoping for something more
that’s how he felt too, and he knew, so he tried to bring you food or hang out with you more so you could feel better
you were so loyal, to the point of hurting someone else if they were rude to the people you were close to
he didn’t know how to describe you, he would see you as cold sometimes, but in the dally type of way
not in the hating everyone type of way, but the protective ‘don’t let anyone in’ way
he would defend you when others would say you’re weird, not just because you were his sister but because he truly cared about you
DARRY CURTIS
you were out, and it was 2am, walking back home
you were previously ‘busy’ at a restaurant, you had snuck in to do homework because you didn’t want to do it at home
you totally lost track of time, and before you knew it, everyone was gone and the outside was dark
you walked home with your backpack, not being nervous even though hardly any light was out, the only source being the street lights
when you were within a block of your house, you saw the lights were on, and you sighed
you walked into the living room and closed the door, seeing darry on the recliner, putting the phone down
he got up and you backed up, speaking loudly, “where the hell have you been!? it’s nearly three, you better have a good reason why you were out. plus, it’s a school night.”
you stared at him, replying with, “i don’t have a good reason why i was out. i was doing homework and lost track of time.”
you didn’t blink, and he started speaking louder, walking towards you slowly with a mad look on his face
you didn’t back up, wanting him to think you didn’t care, but he said, “it’s not safe for you to be outside after dark. you have to be inside, in the damn house by 12. you know what the hell happened to that girl a few blocks down, don’t you? you don’t even have a switchblade in your pocket, how are you gonna protect yourself, huh? huh!?”
your throat closed up and tears slowly formed in your eyes, so you quietly said, “it won’t happen again.” and walked away, your head down, soda looking at you
you went to your room and sat on the bed, staring at the floor, sighing
you felt like darry didn’t care about you sometimes, but you know he did deep down, he was just hard on you because you cared so much
you heard a knock on your door, and the door opened slowly, darry coming into the room
he looked at you for a few seconds, trying to observe you, but knowing it was impossible because you had the same expression all the time, emptiness
“i just get worried about you sometimes, im sorry i… almost yelled at you. i don’t want that to happen again, though.” he said, and you nodded, looking down at the floor again
he walked in your direction, sitting next to you on your bed, wrapping an arm around your shoulder and kissing your forehead, saying, “you’re a good kid, y/n.”
he got up off the bed, walking out the door and going into his own
he would worry about you constantly, never knowing whether you were okay or not
the two of you acted the same at times, both with cold eyes and showed love in difficult ways
he would try to bond with you over homework, he would always check it and congratulate you when you would get it right, baking with you, etc, just so you would maybe show emotion
DALLAS WINSTON
you were at the police station for getting into a fight with one of your classmates, breaking a boy’s nose because he was talking shit about your brother, ponyboy
a policeman told you to call someone, so you called the curtis number, but no one picked up
so you called dally’s number, knowing he had experience in this situation
he answered, and you told him, “dally, can you pick me up at the station?” with a flat voice
he replied with, “i’ll be there in ten.” and hung up
ten minutes later, the doors swung open and he stormed in, asking loudly, “where the hell is y/n curtis?”
a policeman sighed and asked you, “you asked dallas winston to pick you up?” and you nodded, he scoffed and motioned you to go to dally
the two of you walked out of the station, him driving you to your house
“the fuck were you in there for?” he asked with concern
“beat up a kid in my class for talking shit about pony.” you replied, looking out of the window
he nodded, knowing you would get overwhelmed sometimes, causing you to act aggressive
the two of you had that in common, you were fine with beating people up if they were talking shit about someone you knew
he felt bad for you at times, you never looked like you had emotions, and he assumed you had none for a while, you were tough, too tough for your age
he’d try to calm you down at times, even though you were stubborn, so you wouldn’t do anything you’d regret
he cared for you as he cared for johnny, you needed to be loved, like how even dally needed to be loved
TWO-BIT MATTHEWS
he was at the curtis house with the gang when you came in, backpack on and flowers in your hand
“hey sis, how was school?” soda asked, and two-bit teased, “yeah, and why do you have flowers? someone like you, huhhhh???”
“school was fine. i have flowers because a boy gave them to me.” you said, and two-bit ‘oooo’d, “as a joke.” you continued
“shit, you serious? did you beat him up?” he asked, and you nodded, saying you got sent home early
you sat next to him, he was on the couch so you sat on his left, he had chocolate cake on his lap
“want some?” he asked, and you shook your head, knowing you could get more if you wanted some
the two of you stared at the screen of the tv, mickey mouse playing, he laughed and looked at you, seeing your blank expression, not blinking
“you okay?” he asked, taking a pause from watching mickey mouse and eating cake, putting down the fork, looking at you with worry
you nodded, and he asked once again, “you sure? you don’t ever seem to show that much emotion..”
you stared at the tv, saying, “i just don’t feel much sometimes. but you should know i do care. about a lot. i don’t look like i show emotion, im guessing.”
he stared at you, feeling remorse for asking you the question in the first place, apologizing
he always tries to make jokes in order to try to get you to smile or show an expression other than nothing
two-bit realized you cared about him more than he thought when you called him keith, and telling him he should stop drinking, that he might die early and he shouldn’t want being drunk to be his normal
you would talk to him about emotions, even though it was rare, he would always be happy that you were opening up
he understood emotions better than the rest of the gang, which is something you didn’t expect, but you didn’t tell him that
he would give you advice, he had already been through a lot but was a loving person
STEVE RANDLE
steve and soda were at the DX, working while you were secretly in the back, doing your homework
steve was about to go on his break when he went into the back, seeing your back facing him, hearing you writing something
“y/n? the hell are you doing here, shouldn’t you be at home?” he asked
“no one’s home.” you replied, not even looking at him
the conversation ended there, and he walked back to soda, who was at the cashier, telling him about what just happened
“hey, uh, your sisters in the back doing homework. do you know why she’s here?” he asked your brother
he looked at steve, saying, “i’m guessing no one was home. i don’t know why she’s here though.” he looked into the back, seeing you finishing up your packet of homework
steve asked your brother if you were okay, and soda went on a rant, saying, “i have no idea, man.. i feel bad, we don’t talk much. i mean, i know she’s my sister and all but we don’t seem close, like, at all. she doesn’t seem close to anyone.. just does her own thing, but she has a lot of great qualities. she’s a good person, but i really worry about her, man.. she won’t talk to me about things.” he paused, “i know this might seem like a lot, and you don’t have to… but do you think you could talk to her? ask how she’s doing?”
steve thought for a second and nodded, walking into the back and sitting on the counter where you were doing your work
“hey, uh, you okay? i’m getting off work in a bit, i can walk you home.” he hesitantly said
you looked up from your paper, staring at him for a couple seconds and saying, “sure.”
a few minutes later, he came into the back and told you, “hey get packed up, i’ll get you home.”
you grabbed your backpack and walked to the front, soda mumbling a “hey” and bringing you into an embrace, but you didn’t know how to respond
you awkwardly patted his back, and when he let go, you and steve walked home
two girls walked past you, both socs and not where they were supposed to be
they giggled and said, “god, why are they dressed like that? stupid hoods..” and you looked back at them, stopping in your tracks
you made eye contact with one of the girls and walked towards her, punching her in the face, her head going back and her friends eyes going wide, jaw dropping and gasping, hands going over her mouth
she grabbed her friend and the two of them ran back to their car, not looking back at you
you walked back to steve and continued walking to your house, he asked you, “why the fuck did you do that?”
“they were talking shit about us.” you replied, and didn’t say anything else, eyes concentrated on what was around you, observing
he thanked you for standing up for him and yourself, saying you could’ve handled it better though
you looked up and glared at him, looking down and thinking, ‘the fuck else was i supposed to do? i just helped him, god..’ but not saying it out loud
you got frustrated at times, and he understood that well
but that one interaction with you helped him make up his mind, that you were a true friend and were loving
you didn’t consider him a friend, and he didn’t consider you a friend either, but the two of you would protect each other and stand up for each other
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authors note: i’m so sorry i’ve been posting late!! i’ve been really occupied but im trying my best to post
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enchanting-chit-chat · 6 months ago
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Theory About Baby Beetlejuice 🍼👶🧷🩸
Warning: This post contains SPOILERS for ‘Beetlejuice Beetlejuice’ (2024) and many speculations.
A few months ago, Tim Burton introduced some new additions to the Beetlejuice universe: one of the new characters is a bizarre, monster infant, officially named 'Baby Beetlejuice'. He definitely made a shocking first impression around the world.
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He is supposed to be nothing more than an illusion, a twisted joke conjured by Beetlejuice. In this article, the birthing scene is explained as a tribute to Geena Davis' performance in 'The Fly' (1986). Additionally, this fellow theorist's post (moonsceptre) pointed out that Baby Beetlejuice looks and acts very similarly to the monster baby in the film 'It's Alive!' (1974). So, all things considered, it would be easy to dismiss the demon baby as a quirky little easter egg and nothing more.
Yet... the same baby reappears in Lydia’s dreams at the very end of the movie. Usually, recurring elements in filmmaking are called motif, and may serve several purposes to the storytelling. This raises a question: does Baby Beetlejuice actually represent something more?
I’m not sure! But let’s dive in and see if we can make sense of it all. ✨
First, a recap. During its first appearance, Lydia ‘gives birth’ to Baby Beetlejuice after a magical, immaculate pregnancy that lasts about 15 seconds. The ‘father’ takes one quick look at the baby and unceremoniously kicks him across the room. As if that wasn’t crazy enough, Baby Beetlejuice immediately crawls back to Lydia and latches onto her legs, biting her thighs repeatedly as she desperately tries to shake him off.
Then, Baby Beetlejuice appears again in a dream - a dimension linked to the subconscious mind. This time, he’s born in a hospital, and his mother is Astrid, Lydia’s daughter. The little devil immediately starts killing the nurses, biting them to death. He even crawls onto the ceiling to chase and eat a fly. Finally, he plops onto Astrid’s lap, already calling her ‘mama.’
What can be the meaning behind all this?
My short Answer: Lydia's anxiety and hopes for a mysterious future.
Long Answer: In 'The Fly', Veronica witnesses her partner slowly change both physically and mentally - in an alarming, mysterious way. Later on, as she learn that she's pregnant with his baby, she has a nightmare about giving birth to a monstrous creature.
In a similar way, I believe that Baby Beetlejuice may embodies all the anxiety and negativity that Lydia associates with the ability to see and communicate with ghosts - a gift she unintentionally passed on to her daughter. A gift that can potentially destroy both of their lives. This is why Lydia tried so hard to keep Astrid safe and distant from her spirit work, for as long as she could. However, at the end of Beetlejuice 2 she realizes she can’t protect Astrid anymore, because ghosts are naturally drawn to those with the gift. Therefore, Lydia wishes for a better life for her daughter... and for herself as well.
This theory is supported by some dream decoder's websites, as well as this weirdly specific article:
Apparently, different dream experts agree that “dreaming about giving birth to a monster” is quite common and often has nothing to do with actually having a baby.
(although it can sometimes be associated with the actual fear of childbirth/being pregnant/becoming a mother, sometimes referred to as 'tokophobia')
In dreams, this scenario often reflects fears about the outcome of a situation, decision or project, and even the desire to explore an alternative way of life. The monster itself typically embodies change, worries, and repressed feelings, but also the possibility of new beginnings. In real life, it can be interpreted as a useful and even positive vision.
...but hey, that's just a theory! A Beetlejuice theory! Until next time, have a fantastic week! ✨
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acourtofthought · 4 months ago
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I visited Tumblr today and saw a lot of negative posts about Gwynriel x Eluciens. I think the books will have different interpretations from each one.
It could be Azriel's book or Elain's, only Sarah can say.
It's childish to keep arguing about who is wrong and who is not in relation to the next book.
In any case, we will have to wait a long time for Acotar to be ready, there will be 3 more books and not 2 and both the Eluciens and Gwynriel will have to wait to read each other's books.
The one who needs to be in a hurry is Sarah who is making us wait a long time for Acotar, my problem is her writing pace which is very slow.
Maybe I'm exaggerating, I think people are also afraid of releasing Acotar 5 now and having to wait another 5 years for Acotar and their favorite couple.
But let's hope that after Acotar 5, whether it's Elucien or Gwynriel, we'll have Acotar 6 and not an Acofas-style novel, and there won't be any other saga to get in the way.
Honest opinion: Az is at rock bottom, but I don't think we'll see rock bottom like Feyre and Nesta because the characters themselves don't need that to have a book exactly.
Azriel is in the process of accepting the cold, hard reality.
The important thing for me is to be able to say Gwynriel Endgame and Elucien Endgame and I'll be here waiting for the book of these two happy couples.
And Elain's book will develop what Sarah didn't do throughout Acotar.
To be honest, Elain had little development, but unfortunately Sarah also helped a lot, when she kept throwing her to solve later.
I bet her focus now will be on Elucien and she will also introduce more things for Gwynriel or vice versa.
I shouldn't stay here wanting someone else to see the same thing.
Note: Elain is also Feyre's aunt and sister and I bet Elain can have even more moments with her nephew in her book but little because she will also be busy with Lucien and her life.
They are fighting and now they see a book like Acofas and made a fuss over nothing.
Stay well and don't pay attention to all the hate you received, I think all the points are valid about who your opinions are about who the next book is. And in fact it could be anyone.
I agree, I think it could be either an Elucien or Gwynriel book. The main issue is we're only working with half the information necessary to make a truly educated guess which means anything is a possibility. Based off of the ACOTAR series alone I do think Elucien makes the most sense and I still feel Bloomsbury would not base the next ACOTAR book off of information given in an entirely different series. But depending on how much Sarah plans on incorporating crossover stuff into the next book it's possible that Gwynriel has the edge.
I don't think Elucien's are necessarily arguing "we're right and you need to respect that!". I think what they're saying is, "please stop acting like it's not a valid possibility for our ship to be next especially when using Elain / Lucien / Elucien tags." Because like you said, nobody except Sarah is Sarah so it's odd for anyone to claim something is happening or is definitely not happening until she confirms it.
I agree though, I think there is stress across the fandom over the thought of having to wait an extra 4+ years for your favorites story especially because it sounds like the book after this one is not going to be another ACOTAR book but a different project. Many have invested a lot of time and energy into this space but at some point they might want to move on. However, moving on is always a bit tricky when you are still waiting for resolution, and the never ending wait can be annoying. I personally don't know that it's enough to say "well, at least my ship is confirmed even if XYZ has a book first" because that's not enough for some. First off, it's not actually confirmation since Sarah could change her mind or ship when finally getting to a certain characters book. Second, not everyone is as invested in an Elucien story or a Gwynriel story so if their OTP is pushed down the road, I don't think they're actually going to be feeling happiness about it. Some might not care either way but there are those who will and I think we have to stop expecting everyone to "just be fine with whoever is next".
I do think Elain has had development but I think the main issue is that the other characters are struggling to acknowledge that change in her. Which is normal, it's like a parent who has a difficult time seeing their 18 year old as an adult ready to head off to college on their own after they've always looked at them as their child. I think that's why Elain does need a book though, I don't think the others are going to come around to the development she's already had until she has a POV. Her own POV isn't more important than anyone else's but I think her POV will be more important for her specific character in terms of the other characters finally starting to take her seriously, it's not going to happen without it.
Edit: thank you by the way ❤️
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maddy-k-reads-all-day · 8 months ago
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The Amanda Fic Lore
So you know how the games slowly reveal more about the character’s real lives as the tapes go on. Well unfortunately, I have no idea what the third, fourth or any other number of games in this series are going to do. So for my Amanda fic series, I’m going to make up my own lore. (mostly based on my interpretations of the characters so a lot of these are going to be similar to that post). I guess you could think of this as an AU cuz I’ll probably never get everything right. Just so you know I may edit this when I come up with more ideas.
Spoilers for the fics ig
Amanda: (We know plenty about her already so she’s not going to be that much different from the game.)
Rebecca Colton. 
Had morbid interests as a child long before Hameln.
Has a dark sense of humor
As Rebecca, she was genuinely a ray of sunshine to be around. (Even with morbid interests). 
Secretly has a dark sense of humor
Very adventurous 
Does not like her plans being changed
Loves to draw (we see it multiple times).
Has had past trauma before Hameln even entered the picture (Sam's despite what she's been through in reference to her adoption). 
Has some varying level of interest in goth/emo/punk style.
She doesn’t resent Sam. 
Wants to keep her memories of Sam and Kate close.
I saw a theory that maybe Rebecca was trying to get Sam and Kate together like maybe there were some sparks flying there. I really like that so it might be canon in this universe. 
She’s starting to lose hope that she’s going to escape. 
Starting to slowly trust Wooly again and be his friend again. 
Trying to learn to control her anger issues. 
The Amanda wiki says she is 7-8 years old. So that’s the age we’re gonna stick with for when she got stuck in the tapes. I’m going to go with 8.
Wooly: (I think it would be interesting if his human life was the opposite of Amandas.) 
Slowly developing anger issues (lol) 
Based on reader suggestions, human name for this fic series will be William Scott.
Was ten years old when trapped. A child actor like Amanda, has been working with Hameln longer than her. 
Was a child of a single mother who never wanted children. She tried to be loving at first but eventually gave up. Spends most of her time working or away. He ended up being a parentified older sibling and that’s why he acts so “mature” and seems so worried about safety. She ended up signing off his soul to Hameln in order to make money and basically get rid of him. So he has a bit of abandonment issues. 
He had a little sister, never saw her again after being sold off to Hameln. Doesn’t know if she met the same fate. They were very close. Amanda reminds him of her sometimes, even though they were very different. EDIT: You know what? Maybe it's cuz I really like angst, but what if Wooly's sister passed away instead? Like prior to Wooly being sent to Hameln. Like maybe in some sort of accident while they were playing when their mom wasn't home?)
Slowly remembering his past life (way slower than Amanda because he doesn’t want to remember). 
Doesn’t think they can escape.
Not exactly loyal to Hameln, but terrified of what will happen if they disobey. Slowly starting to not care anymore. 
Bottles up every negative emotion but is getting to a point where he can’t hold it in anymore. 
Starting to become more rebellious
Slowly repairing his relationship with Amanda
Hates being alone. 
Will avoid talking about uncomfortable subjects at all costs. Tends to be a bit controlling. 
His intentions are good. But let us remember what they say. The road to hell was paved with good intentions. 
He seems to be that one goody-two shoes friend in a friend group that's like: "We shouldn't do this." Even if it's objectively not that bad. 
Prone to panic or anxiety attacks.
And how do we feel about adding in the autistic head canon?
The Narrator is Sam
The "Owl" uses prerecorded voice lines of Kate, but cannot say anything else and isn't actually Kate. Why is she an owl? We'll have to wait and see...
Over time the more Amanda learns about Wooly the less afraid of her the demon will become.
Also, I think Wooly's demon will become less violent the less he keeps bottling things up. But it'll get worse before it gets better.
Once I get a couple tapes written I’m going to put them in an order that makes sense like some post that will be linked in the pinned post or whatever. But for now I’m gonna write them as the ideas come to me. If you have any Amanda fic lore to suggest, let me know. If I find it interesting I’ll add it in. 
Also these fics are completely separate from the School Shopping fic. 
As I said before, this isn’t necessarily what I think will happen in the games, it’s just some placeholder lore for me to use to build them around.
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king-lyrebird · 1 month ago
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hii i would really love to hear abt your honarui agenda (if you want talk abt it no pressure ofc!!)
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I OWE YOU MY LIFE I GET TO TALK ABOUT MY SILLY LITTLE DALINGS SO MUCH NOW
It sucks so much that they've hardly interacted because THEYRE JUST SO GOOD. Someone who has slowly learned to start standing her ground and let go of being a people pleasing perfectionist and somone who has spent his life isolating because everyone including himself has convinced him he doesn't deserve connection and companionship until now. They're both the ones in their group that intentionally pulled away because of how they were hurt (Honami by her own fear of being bullied and Rui by the way Tsukasa acted after the failed show), and therefore the final piece of the puzzle in helping their groups find their feelings and creating their Untitled songs. THEY ARE BOTH DIFFERENT AND THE SAME I UGDUFIGH
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The general perception of them both is that Honami is very caring and a bit timid, and Rui is a little bit insane despite how much he cares about others. They easily see that caring side in each other, and even if Honami might find Rui a bit odd, I think she also wouldn't want to have a negative view of him because she knows personally how awful it feels to be called weird. And in turn he would see first that she is strong and steadfast before he sees her kindness (I think with the way he's treated Mizuki and his friendship with her, he's way more perceptive of people than he lets on)
Locking into some of their comedic potential, we have to consider who their best friends are. These two are close to none other than the dastardly Tenma siblings, the two dumbest and smartest people in their lives. THE PLOTTING THAT WOULD GO DOWN IN THE TENMA HOUSE those two are nothing but DEVIOUS.
Onto my more crack-worthy takes about them, that is two TALL and STRONG queens!! Saki has a card dedicated to her feeling Honami's muscles, and Rui spent part of an event hiking fast up a mountain with machinery in his backpack and didn't even break a sweat. I know we have the gym junkie trio in Haruka, Akito, and Tsukasa, but I fully stand by that Honami and Rui could carry each other with ease (and now I'm sad that there's no art of that anywhere)
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What's more is that Honami is always mindful that everyone around her is eating well, she hand prepares meals to make sure Kanade is getting what she needs... and then there's Rui who is apparently the way he is fuelled only by ramune sweets and meat. Rui would learn to love apple pies for her though trust me
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And duuude the amount of mixed events they've been in together???? There's so many matching cards. The amount of times Rui has a 2 star to Honami's 4 star is so funny (the bride and the ugly ass groom core). They also just have cards that can match, like their weddings cards, and Honami's summer card and Rui's Coral in the Box card
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and my poor sweeties.... stuck in 4th focus hell together. Godspeed my darlings you WILL have your 5th focus events soon!! My dream is that they'll be announced together like,,,, what if we were in 4th focus hell,, and we got our 5th focuses together,, and we kissed,,,,,,? but also they've actually never missed with a focus song?? the cultural shift that their 4th focus cards brought about, they are SO GOOD!! cyberpunk dead boy and regulus my beloved
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(and since my agenda was pushed because of the silly pride icons, I personally love showing them both as bi! I'm bi myself and I want to promote more ships that are with characters who are without a doubt bisexual. I hate the narrative that 'queer coding' means a character is gay, and there's no room for interpretation of anything else. There are so many queer identities and I love seeing my own be shown with characters I love!)
TLDR: they have really interesting story parallels, would get along better than most people think they would, have a lot of comedic potential, have been in a lot of events together, and have fantastic songs and stories. Perhaps I project a little onto them, but I genuniely love them so much and any interaction between them makes me happy.
If you've read until this point, thank you, and I hope I've expressed my thoughts in a way that makes sense! Live Laugh Love Honarui!
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stealerofthe2ndbraincell · 8 months ago
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In9 rant incoming.
For some god forbid reason, the rats in my brain have connected my thoughts after watching Arcane S2 to one episode of IN9 that I recently rewatched, Tempting Fate, so I'm going to ramble a little.
I've seen differing interpretations of Nick's wish at the very end to help Keith's son.
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Mainly about whether or not he had malicious intentions behind it.
Throughout the story, he remains the most vigilant in regards to not making silly wishes because, unlike Maz and especially Keith, he is aware of the massive negative repercussions. He's the first to connect what happened to Frank to the wishes and remains firm on not risking a wish at all. So he should know that wishing anything for Charlie would backfire and harm potentially him and Keith.
(Although, it is ironic that 2/3 of their wishes were made by him)
Not only that, but Nick doesn't have any reason to want to be nice to Keith at this point, with this line only muddling things further.
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By this point he's seen Keith attempt to steal £93,000 that Nick knows (and keeps on trying to tell him) is cursed, witnesses him completely roll over and ignore his colleagues death, finds out he's a literal murderer who proceeded to attempt to kill him in a frankly cruel manner (using his alcoholism against him and pouring some into his unconscious mouth to frame Maz's and his own death as a drunken accident that leads to a gas leak (implying he was willing to blow him up in the process)).
At this point, Nick has been lied to and betrayed by a friend of 12 years in such a significant way that it seems wild for his wish to be made out of sincere care for Keith.
However, what I find most interesting about this scene is how clearly out of it Nick is when he breaks the news.
Granted I don't think the drink would have that much of an influence, but you know what would: being smashed directly on the head by a bloody rabbit statue a few minutes beforehand.
From the slurred speech, breaks in breath and general body language, Nick is concussed at the very least.
Now this isn't me siding as to whether or not he intended to hurt Keith and Charlie, the former making the act kind of cruel once again if on purpose, but I don't think it's out of the question that it was done with some semblance of hope.
Not only did he discover and witness all the awful things Keith was willing to do and had done, but he had also seen how all of it was focused on Charlie's recovery. He went to Frank so he could afford the treatment required, he stole the money later for the very same and he got over Maz's death so quickly because he had that money as his top priority. The problem was that Keith wouldn't listen when he told him that money was cursed.
He also doesn't have full faith that all wishes will screw you over as well.
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Even back with Maz, he attempts to think of safe and harmless ways the wishes could be used when she wishes for "not too much, but enough to make a difference" amounts of money.
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Although Nick states that every wish backfires, he hasn't lost all faith in the idea that they could do good and not cause immense levels of harm.
That still present faith, awareness of how far Keith was willing to go for his son, alongside how clearly not in a decision making state he was in at the end of the story, I think paints a different perspective. Specifically one where he could have genuinely and sincerely wished Charlie back to health potentially for Keith.
Whilst I still think, especially with the "it's what you deserve" line, that Nick could have definitely had cruel intentions wishing to help Charlie, I really like how ambiguous the episode leaves it.
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