#so i have to project them onto my current interests

[dramaturgydrakes]

rebabied hermes au but hermes starts crying and apollo travels multiple hundred miles in the blink of an eye without even thinking about it because he used to keep an ear out for when little hermes was upset and even after hundreds if not thousands of years it’s still Deeply ingrained in him

he will always deny this reflex without fail however

[sysig]

Haven’t seen you around these parts (Patreon)

[seventh-district]

why have i suddenly been gripped with the desire to get back into fishkeeping

[shouyuus]

popular host club host!keigo who's constantly the top 1 or 2 in his host club, so he's got a long roster of regulars, but one of them happens to be a good friend of yours who brings you in one day bc you're a bit naive and she thought it was about time you got out there in the world

host!keigo who is no stranger to shy little birdies, but still has a job to do, so he does his usual thing with your friend, asks about her part time job, compliments her new hairstyle, asks if she's gotten that one toner he recommended, before turning to you and offering you a smile and a wink, and is more charmed than a man in his profession should be at the way you turn red and refuse to meet his eyes

host!keigo who keeps it casual, wears relaxed, but chic street-style clothing and keeps his roots bleached well, but almost nothing else, except for the two slits of black he inks into his inner corners; says that they keep his eyes sharp so he can see all his favorite little birds at the club, of course. and suddenly, you can kinda see why your friend likes coming here so much -- the conversation is nice and he's never too pushy, but it's effortless, the way he talks about himself and gets everyone to talk about themselves as well.

host!keigo who's earnest when he asks you about your interest and feels himself smiling when you light up and talk about the things you love -- reading, painting, photography -- your friend cuts in that it's a shame you're too shy to ask him to be a model for one of your projects bc he does photograph really well, to which you blush even harder and keigo wonders briefly if there's something in the air or in the drinks today bc wow is he feeling just a tad lightheaded and from the looks of it so are you.

host!keigo who, when your friends goes to the bathroom, leans across the booth to hand you his card, just a black card with two bright red wings embossed onto the hard cardstock, runs a finger along the line of your cheek, tilts your chin up and says, "if you ever wanna come see me too... i'll make time for you, dove. all you gotta do is ask." but when u tell him, a little too honestly, that you can't afford him, he just looks at you with a little smirk and says "like i said, dove, i'll make time for you." and leaves it at that

host!keigo who texts you good morning and goodnight, who asks you if you've eaten, who, you're pretty sure, on his days off, pings you and asks you what you're doing. so you tell him that you don't have plans and he immediately calls to ask if you want to hang out -- he picks you up at the train station, wearing just a fitted black tee and some loose-fitted jeans, but even then, people are turning around, doing double takes, but he doesn't seem to notice, only grinning and jogging up to meet you, asking if there's anywhere you'd like to go

host!keigo who takes u to the aquarium and then to the park, where you do a few doodles in your notepad. he leans over to watch and even though your first instinct is to hide your work, you let him see it anyway -- something about him makes you want to trust him, and for once, you want to lean into that. he tells you that your art is beautiful, and you ask, before you can stop yourself, if you can draw him, "it'd be my honor, little bird."

host!keigo who makes you laugh by doing the most dramatic poses before leaning up against a tree and closing his eyes and you sketch him out, feeling your heart in your throat, but when you show him, he goes still and quiet, before asking if he can keep it. you nod and hand the sketch over, blushing bc he holds it like it's lost treasure, something he's spent his whole life looking for --

host!keigo who takes you to dollar karaoke, claps and laughs as you try to sing the current idol song, who is, unsurprisingly, fantastic at singing and tells you to pick your favorite song for him to serenade to you, who pays for all the drinks and never asks you to shell out a time; when you try to get the last round, he gently pushes your hand away and says "not today, little bird, i wanna do this so... let me."

host!keigo who, when you ask him if he does this with all his clients, bends down and flicks a bit of hair from your face before his eyes flicker down to your lips, says, "no... only the ones i really, really like."

host!keigo who offers to walk you back to the station but when you get there, he seems hesitant to say something -- when you gently ask about it, he lets out a tiny little laugh, shakes his head and says, "y'know it's weird -- all these years of being a host... i've never felt like this before but... you just -- god, how embarrassing, right? my whole job is to be good at talking to people and here i am, at a loss for words --" he pauses, runs a hand through his hair before turning back towards you with an earnest smile, "guess what im trying to say is... i spend all day tryna make people feel like they're special, like they're the only person in the entire world but... with you... it's the first time someone's made me feel like that and... i kinda wanna be selfish, be greedy and take you somewhere and keep you all to myself but..."

host!keigo who thinks he might be losing his mind when you smile up at him with that brilliant blush of yours and tell him that "if that's what you wanted... i wouldn't mind... if it were you."

[edwinspaynes]

Okay, so. I am very happy to inform y'all that I am beginning work on the first "episode" (chapter) of my Dead Boy Detectives season 2 fic today!

It has two potential working titles, both lyrics from Taylor Swift's Fresh Out the Slammer. I am not going to reveal them because I haven't selected which one I'll be using yet.

It will have 9 chapters. The official case titles are:

The Case of the Weeping Walls

The Case of Niko Sasaki

The Case of the Choked Cheerleaders

The Case of the Scorned Son

The Case of Hell's Own Track

The Case of the Shredded Tapestry

The Case of the Separated Soulmates

The Case of the Great Fire, Part I

The Case of the Great Fire, Part II

Each chapter will also come with a fun feature, but I'm not sure I'm ready to talk about that yet. :)

IF YOU WANT TO BE ON THE TAGLIST FOR THIS FIC, PLEASE COMMENT ON THIS POST. I will tag everyone who wants a tag, but only if they comment since that's how I'll keep track of the list.

Next question because I know this is going to be an extremely expansive and time-consuming project:

I would still post my usual DBDA content, including other DBDA fics, on this blog. The other one would be exclusively for longfic-related updates.

I would probably still reblog the chapters I post there onto this blog.

Finally, something for you to enjoy: a playlist for the fic! This is very short and uninteresting, but it will be an ever-evolving thing that probably gets long eventually, so please follow it if you're interested :)

A few spoilers under the cut that might impact interest (endgame ship, etc)

Unequivocal Payneland endgame (they're soulmates your honour)

Palasaki and NN/Kashi endgames

Happy ending for The Cat King, who plays a big role in the story

No Sandman crossovers besides potentially a Death appearance (I do not know Sandman well enough to include them)

BAMF Edwin scenes ;)

No Esther or Monty (sorry!) - there is a new OC antagonist

I'm currently trying to find a place for Jenny. I want to include her, but she will likely only have a few cameos since I can't for the life of me think of a plotline to involve her in.

I will be keeping up with Yockey-posted spoilers and incorporating them into the story when possible (so, Niko is the Principal, etc)

[valtrieys]

★ pairing : bf!chan x reader

★ warnings : smut (ofc) , degrading , some praising , chan calls reader interesting words (whore) kinda mean!chan, d&s dynamics , jealousy , daddy kink (mentioned like 2 times) , overstimulation at the end

★ a/n : this was a draft for a good while and was the original for my second work (sexting w chan) so lmk how it is....

Is this what you wanted? —- do you like it when you make me mad, so I can fuck the brat out of you?"

"n—no," you choked out desperately trying to show that he doesn't have an effect on you

you were currently laid on chan's desk in the studio, his work and things long forgotten on the floor as he couldn't bother with them, not anymore at least

chan was thrusting his hips into you, pace rapid and rough, your mind only being flooded with the feelings of immense pleasure that were going throughout your body,

your senses being heightened to the max, feeling extra aware of your breathing and way blood ran to your head-

"I don't think so baby, you seem to be enjoying yourself," he says with a shit eating grin before throwing his head forward to nibble on your shoulder

the pleasure building up in your stomach becomes too much that you can't hold in your moans anymore, toes curling and eyes rolling to the back of your head

not wanting to give chan the satisfaction he so desperately wants, you try to cover your mouth but he beats you to it and grabs both your wrists holding them up

not being able to say anything without sounding straight up pornographic, you simply bury your head into his desk where his work once was, cheeks running hot

he knows the effect he has on you

he can't ever help himself from teasing you, seeing your flustered face each time he does it, your image so beautiful when it happens,

he can never help the feelings of excitement rushing through him leading all the way to the tip of his thick and veiny cock

"look at me or I'll stop," he threatens, his voice projecting throughout the room, he feels you tighten to his deep and hoarse voice

not being to think properly without the constant thought of the way his cock was filling you to the brim, or the way his punishing thrusts made you feel things you have never felt before,

finally as you go to turn your head, one of chan's hands that was previously holding your hands up moves over, suddenly he's holding onto your chin forcing you to look at his face,

the eye contact you both hold is full of lust and desire, chris examines your face through his hooded eyes, looking at you as his you were a piece of art, his piece of art. all his.

"fuck- look at you. you are mine, all mine,"

he wasn't asking, he was letting you know that you were in his possession, that you are bonded with him forever.

"yes, all y-yours," answering his declaration of your forever bond although knowing what he truly meant, hands moving to grip the corner of his desk in order to stabilize yourself a bit more

"chan, fuck. I'm so close," whispering out, leaving your mouth ajar after letting chris learn the new source of information that you let out,

"my personal whore is gonna come, yeah?" his accent thickens towards the end of the sentence, voice presenting false sympathy adding onto his the pout he was giving you.

moving his hands to go knead your ass giving a few slaps here and there that would definitely leave your skin red for atleast a couple of hours, he slows his pace, slowly rolling his hips into you giving you the full experience of his length.

you let out a choked moan, chris feels the way your walls tighten against him, your close and he knows it

"let it all out for daddy," he hisses out, a mix of his and your sweat sticking to his skin, his face red from the heat of the room,

finally letting yourself cum after holding it in until you were given the permission to do so, riding out your high until you finally came back from the heavenly experience

stringing out whines from the overstimulation of chan still continuing his pace of abusing your tight cunt, "just- a little more baby," he huffs out trying to reach his high

"fuck- you wanted this- don't complain and let daddy do what he needs to," his eyebrows furrowing when you try to whine once more, your whole body sore after a good fuck.

his hips finally start to stutter as he approaches his high, letting out his load inside of you, "my good girl," he sighs putting his chin on your shoulder.

moving you over so he could face you, he pushing your wet hair back finally giving you a peck on the forehead

"my baby did so well for me," he chuckles, his aura completely changing after the fact

"thank you channie," you whisper showing your appreciation for him.

finally adding on as he started to gather both of your clothing, "sorry, for earlier. I didn't know he was flirting with me, I thought he was just being extra nice," staring down at the floor avoiding any eye contact, your voice showing the embarrassment of not being able to take hints.

"yeah, I noticed. just wanted to make sure you know who you belonged to."

[sunflower-chai]

THANK YOU the acolyte for disproving the “jedi steal kids” sentiment held by so much of the fandom. they ask for permission from a guardian before children can be tested! and even if they pass it is their choice to go or not!

also thank you for giving me more physically affectionate jedi!! other than kanan and ezra, and one time with anakin and ahsoka after ahsoka literally died, i feel like we never see masters hug their padawans. sol and osha’s hug gave me LIFE.

really curious about what exactly the coven on brendok is. they don’t seem to be nightsisters yet they call themselves witches. they seem a little sus since they discourage osha from going into/learning about the outside world, which feels slightly cultish. but also mother aniseya clearly loves her girls and they clearly love her. she does not physically harm them (other than the force push during the training exercise) and she is warm and nurturing. it’s very complicated and i hope the show delves into that further. also what is it with force-sensitive children not having fathers?? lol.

i liked the contrast of mae wanting to share everything with osha while osha wants to discover who she is as an individual, creating some interesting tension in their relationship. i also feel like mae was a really good example of what unhealthy attachment actually looks like. if she cannot have osha, no one can. and she does not care about the potential repercussions for everyone else. i think mae might have realized she went too far near the end when she begged osha to jump over to her, but then she fell and it was too late. and her hatred for the jedi has twisted her mind so much that she does not blame herself for what happened but projects it onto them. they are the ones who wanted to take osha away. they are the reason osha is (presumably) dead. she is not at fault. they forced her hand.

it’s a really intriguing thought process, and i’m wondering where it came from. has mae always been this way? did the ascension ceremony change her nature in some way? this sort of goes back to my questions about the coven. mother aniseya said they were exiled for using “dark” powers. so are they dark side users? it’s interesting how they refer to the force as “the thread” and place more emphasis on individual agency over destiny (i.e., “the will of the force”). but mother aniseya also criticizes those who see the force as a “power” to wield rather than something that connects the galaxy. which is just… misinformed? the jedi also don’t see the force as a power? literally “the force surrounds us. it penetrates us. it binds the galaxy together.” so maybe they have some incorrect assumptions.

wondering if mae’s current master finds her on brendok after the fire. i feel like that would make sense. she’s eight years old and the only person left alive on the planet, she would need someone to find her. and continue to cultivate that hate within her and form her into the living weapon she is today.

[bmegrl9124]

I’m not a Sydcarmy shipper, but it is interesting how many of the non shippers and anti shippers project onto the show. I say that because some will completely ignore the panic attack scene altogether, or ignore parts of the under the table scene, or downplay that scene as well, when these are two scenes that involve the main characters of the show in the penultimate episode of season 2.

It’s not like Tina had a panic attack and her and Ebrah had a under the table scene. Although, they would be significant, neither are main characters of this show.

It’s because these scenes show things that don’t align with what they want to happen in the show, and so they ignore it. Carmy says, first thing to Sydney in their under the table convo, “YOU deserve my full focus,” and it’s crickets from them. Carmy is freaking out, having a whole panic attack triggered by Claire, his girlfriend (so it’s not like this panic attack is anything other than about his romantic life), let’s somehow make him calming down with Sydney strictly about her being his equal, his platonic business partner, and not about her being contrasted with his current girlfriend.

I don’t know, I guess it frustrates me, to a certain extent, that people are so closed off to the idea that Sydney & Carmy could be romantic, that they will ignore scenes we were shown in the show, because there are NO filler scenes in this show.

Everything we are shown, truly matters to the plot & characters.

[starmosaics]

Shadow of natal Venus-Lilith aspects

This post is about Black Moon Lilith and i'm mainly talking about the conjunction and harsh aspects.

I have Venus conjunct Lilith in my own chart so here's some notes based off of my personal experience and observations. Sidenote: I am not shaming anyone for having these shadow aspects as they exist within me as well. Dominant Lilith folks are meant to self integrate their shadow sides to gain better awareness and to accept them to become whole. Everything I speak about are things I currently struggle with or have previously struggled with. I want this to be nothing but a safe space for Lilith dominant folks.

Sexualization and fetishization: These people are often sexualized at a very young age and throughout their lives. People often make sexual comments or gestures towards these individuals. Venus-Lilith folks may also become fetishized. People can project their fantasies onto Venus-Lilith natives, treating them as objects, only viewing them as sexual figures rather than actual human beings. People may have hidden agendas towards the Venus-Lilith person as well usually revolving around wanting to obtain something from them such as sex. People may paint Venus-Lilith people to be provocative and "sexually suggestive" when they're simply just existing.

Society: Lilith dominant people are often shamed by others. People project things onto them and create false perceptions of them. Society will stare, create assumptions, and speak behind these people's back. One of the purposes of Lilith dominance in a chart is for the person to completely leave societal expectations to follow their own unique path and to do it fearlessly. This is a huge challenge for them as they will often feel judged, unaccepted and ridiculed by others. They may have had family members project certain ideals onto them which in return they internalized and grew up trying to fit in with everyone around them. They may have been bullied during their developmental years, or got sucked into societal standards. Whatever a Lilith dominant person does that isn't deemed acceptable by the common collective, there will be talk. They must learn to disregard this and to continue to walk their own path and life their lives to the fullest; something that's true to them. They must honor the things that make them different from others.

Self image and self esteem: When/if sexualized at a young age or shamed by others, they can easily internalize this and seek external validation which in return ruins their perceptions of themselves and their self esteem. They could have an obsession over wanting to achieve perfection committing to an ideal that often is projected onto them by another. These people must work on healing this aspect within themselves as they can easily act on self hatred or create a false image of themselves, essentially creating a mask.

Control: Venus-Lilith folks may have issues regarding control within themselves and their relationships. They may resist any control that is put onto them, but can push to control their partners. They have a difficulty with being told no which can lead to acting impulsively and seeking instant gratification to get what they want; when their eyes are set on something, they do everything to get it. They also can have a hard time with compromising with partners due to their need for control. The need for control often stems from not wanting to be taken advantage of by others, especially by their partners.

Men...: Something to be mindful of is men treat Lilith dominant people weirdly. Men who are in relationships will show interest, men will stare at you wherever you go, their eyes will dart or follow your every move, men will unsolicitedly approach you, men will try to control and dominate you, men will think you're seducing them, men will project their fantasies onto you and have no shame in making it known, and men will objectify and sexualize you. I've had men suggest sex or straight up ask me for it; men who I've barely spoken to or just met. It's disgusting.

Sexuality: I have seen this play out in mainly two different ways; one being the Venus-Lilith person refraining from indulging in their sexual desires, restraining their sexuality and sexual expression, or the Venus-Lilith person discovering their sexuality earlier on and becoming sexually liberated. The shadow sides of these two scenarios is they can either be sexually repressed, usually caused by shame or guilt for having such desires, or they can overt their sexuality in an unhealthy manner, leading to debauchery or to gain or win something from another by luring them in. These people must create a healthy relationship with their sexuality and sexual desires so it's not completely dormant and kept on the backburner, or so it doesn't completely overrule their lives.

Relationships: Oftentimes relationships are complicated for Venus-Lilith natives. They can become another person's rebound, can become a third party (or what they call the other woman/a mistress) in someone else's relationship, can enter a toxic relationship, can confuse passion, limerence, and lust for love, or can repeatedly face heartbreak and chaos in one's love life. Something i've experienced in myself and have noticed in others is that there's sometimes there's a struggle with give in take in their relationships. They may want or expect their partner to fulfill all their needs, essentially wanting more than what they can give. They can have a difficult time with feeling entirely satisfied and may unconsciously ask for more than what a person can give. They may put their needs first or focus on how a relationship will serve them rather than entering something solely for love. Venus-Lilith people may be obsessive and have attachments towards potential partners OR they attract obsessive people. Even in the beginning stage of a relationship, they may find that their partners become quickly attached and possessive over the Venus-Lilith native. Jealousy is also another thing they may face within themselves or whomever they're romantically involved with. When they are in love, they're super intense; feeling love so strongly that it consumes them. Heartbreak is incredibly painful for anybody, but people with Venus-Lilith may completely rip themselves apart if heartbroken. At the end of a painful heartbreak or lesson in love, there's always an incredible transformation these individuals go through to better understand themselves and their shadows, deepest desires and fears, and others.

[cyb3rtarot]

Pick a Pile: Message From Your Inner Child + How You Can Nurture Them

Disclaimers: choose the pile you feel intuitively drawn to; you can choose more than one! Take what already resonates and leave anything confusing or stressful. Readings are not replacements for professional advice. I used a mix of tarot, oracle, and my intuition.

pile 1->pile 2

pile 3->pile 4

░░░

Pile 1

Message [Justice||nine of hearts rx, king of pentacles, nine of wands rx, three of pentacles rx]: hi pile one! Your inner child wants to express feelings of dissatisfaction or being stifled. Many of you are in a good place financially/with work, at least compared to where you used to be. This came from working very hard without much support from others—maybe even being hindered by others. Other people might look at your life and wish they had it, but your inner child does not seem fulfilled by whatever your position is. I don’t sense ungratefulness, but it does seem like your inner child is more interested in something “deeper” or more meaningful than your physical reality is providing. If you’ve had to claw your way out of hard situations, your inner child seems to be looking for some kind of justice or retribution regarding that. You may feel like you deserve more happiness after what you’ve had to go through, or want people who have done you wrong to be punished.

How you can nurture your inner child [the fool, the emperor, king of pentacles rx, three of swords rx]: a more proactive approach to finding meaning and happiness in your life will nurture your inner child. You might be used to going with the flow—especially if you’re materially comfortable or seeking such a lifestyle. Remember that you have the power to initiate new beginnings; you don’t have to stay the same! Give your inner child space to grow and discover what feels right to them, even if it doesn’t make sense to others. Don’t force yourself to remain in an unhappy spot when there are changes within your grasp. Uncertainty is a necessary part of life. There’s also a big emphasis on balancing your work for outer stability with this search for inner happiness; perhaps some of you unnecessarily overwork yourselves which leaves little time for other things. 

For some, this soul searching may involve letting go of past hurts. I’m not trying to force you to forgive others, but to identify how your current reality has formed as a response to pain, and how you can choose to respond differently.

Extra details: isolation, loneliness. Past betrayals and enemies. Being “self made,” supporting oneself. Not being seen and understood, wearing a facade/mask. Music as solace, singing, pop stars (Ariana Grande again lol?). Balance. Being the tough kid, defending yourself. Paying your own way through school. Aggressiveness. Continuous conflict with colleagues or family, unhappiness at work. Wanting to leave a “good” job, or wanting to “run away” (some of you may be daydreaming about “drastic” action, like suddenly quitting and going on a long trip, far away from everyone you know).

░░░

Pile 2

Message [the star rx, seven of wands rx|| nine of swords, the star, four of pentacles rx]: hi pile two! There is a lot of past hurt and trauma in this pile, and your inner child is highly encouraging healing/shadow work. Your inner child is wanting you to lower some of those internal walls so those uncomfortable emotions and memories can be processed. If you feel you need someone like a professional to help you, that is absolutely okay. Healing is hard, trauma is messy, and the “despair” in this pile seems particularly heavy.

How you can nurture your inner child [two of hearts, the tower rx, queen of pentacles rx, the lovers, six of cups rx]: a major focus for your healing journey is examining how past hurts—especially in relationships or childhood—are projected onto present day relationships. You may have developed certain traits or behaviors to survive the past, but now they block you from experiencing the intimacy your inner child craves. This is not to say you should compromise boundaries, but know that intimacy and vulnerability themselves are not the enemy. Thinking or acting like they are can even be a way of self-blaming, as if you not needing love would have prevented others from being toxic or abusers. Examine how past patterns can lead to current self-sabotaging, and also give yourself grace if you feel like you made a mistake. Learning how to navigate relationships of any kind is hard, and trauma can make it harder! Know your inner insecurities are not reflective of the relationship, how others see you, or the truth. If you do wish to work on some aspect of yourself or your healing journey, it’s very much within your capacity.

Extra details: fruit is significant, maybe nostalgic memories of someone cutting or giving you fruit growing up? A house with a tile or distinctive roof, roof decorations. The quiet/shy kid. Feeling like you’re falling apart. Clumsiness. Alone. A lot of yelling and hurtful words (particularly in the past). Childhood or domestic trauma. Catastrophizing. I feel like a lot of you are in a romantic relationship that is triggering anxiety. Practicing healthy communication with your partner may be one part of the healing work mentioned above. I also feel like a lot of you jumped from a very toxic home into a very toxic relationship as you came of age; a current relationship may be difficult due to this pattern that developed.

░░░

Pile 3

Message [ the hermit, the fool rx|| Queen of cups, the chariot, justice rx, ten of pentacles rx, the hanged man rx, the tower]: hi pile 3, your inner child had a lot to say! You might repress them a lot. They want you to know you are living with old mindsets and approaches that are no longer aligned with you. You have a very large inner, emotional world and self awareness, but you don’t let this shine through to the outside. There’s a big nihilistic vibe of just going through the motions and accepting your lot—even when you’re miserable—and even when there’s changes you can make. An imbalance exists between the energy directed towards your mind versus the outside world. There’s a sense of solitude and a “what’s the point?” approach. However, there’s also a sense of restlessness. Your inner child is feeling stifled by this lifestyle; they want to come out and experience enthusiasm! It seems major changes are present or coming in where this can be addressed.

How you can nurture your inner child [the lovers rx, king of swords, knight of wands rx, the emperor rx]: your inner child is encouraging you to embrace excitement for life. It feels like your nihilistic or apathetic approach functions as self-punishment by denying your desires. You’re aware of which things are not working for you anymore, but you’re avoiding tough conversations or decisions. Your inner child wants to break free and to go after what gives them joy; they do not want their emotions to be judged, repressed, or punished. Some of the self awareness you’ve developed in your inner world can be used to help navigate the disappointments and uncertainties of life. You have to wade past these things to reach the treasures in your journey.

Extra details: restlessness, emo (some of you were in middle school), quiet, hurting, simmering anger, Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Green Day, taking an analytical approach to emotions, singing, not being allowed to express emotions growing up. You might say “perhaps” a lot. Water, wanting to live in or visit a location close to water.

░░░

Pile 4

Message [seven of wands rx, king of hearts, the hermit, strength rx, queen of swords|| queen of pentacles, queen of cups rx, five of cups rx, death rx]: hello pile four! The focus of your message is healing vulnerability. You guys have had to be strong by yourself for a long time. For those working on spirituality, it feels like that was the focus of this period. This “hardened” time can come to a close and give way to a new era where you’re more able to face feelings and express them authentically. Your inner child is pointing to a past experience (or multiple) you can revisit to do healing work. This may be a very disappointing heartbreak in a past relationship (of any kind). You might have had to end it with someone who was very attached to you and make that first “hurtful” move so you both could move on and heal. Or, you became disillusioned from lack of emotional fulfillment. Most of you have already done a lot of healing/shadow work and reached a more stable place with your inner sense of security. But, there’s difficulty translating this into being vulnerable with others. Due to the amount of emotional work you had to do, you’re leaning into logic and practicality when there needs to be a balance with emotion. Maybe you can easily identify and scrutinize emotions, but you default to this mental approach to avoid actually feeling it or confronting what you’ve repressed—especially if others’ reactions to your emotions have been disappointing. Protecting yourself is necessary and so is analyzing emotion. But sometimes feelings just need to pass through! We can only “think” our way so far into understanding life lessons. Vulnerability with ourselves—and knowing healthy ways to be vulnerable with others—are both healing.

How you can nurture your inner child [the hierophant rx, king of wands, princess of wands, page of cups rx, the devil rx]: you’ve done a lot of  self-discovery and learning lessons on purpose. This has made space for beautiful growth—however, there’s an emphasis on being open to developing with other people, too. You may want to continue working on yourself in isolation, but some growth and self-knowledge can only be discovered through others. You may repress your inner child’s desire for connection—forcing yourself to be independent. This seems comfortable for you, but not necessarily fulfilling. You may not know where to start with allowing others inside your world. This pile is stuck in the middle of not wanting to deal with toxic BS and yearning for something new + authentic. You may really have to push yourself to leave your comfort zone when it comes to others, and remember that your past experiences don’t define every experience you could have. I’m not suggesting to do things that feel wrong to you, but I am suggesting to notice where you squash your curiosity towards others as a defense mechanism. If you remain true to the things you’ve learned during this time, you’ll be much more adept at spotting insincere people and setting boundaries. And, you’ll be equipped for the inevitable challenges that occur when we get closer to others. These aren’t necessarily bad challenges, but for someone who has learned to love being alone, the metaphorical social “dance” can seem daunting. People are lessons, but not everyone is going to be a hard lesson.

Extra details [TW abuse, self harm, suicide mention]: using spirituality as a reason to not feel (example, not letting yourself feel disappointed because “that’s how it was meant to be”), likes to rhyme or make puns a lot, tendency towards being nonchalant/apathetic, trying to “think” emotions away, not knowing how to stop being so independent. Spiritual, wise, eccentric/enigmatic, self-assured. “Nice” relationships but very few “deep” relationships. Wanting to be friendly but getting alarmed when someone want to be friendly back lol. May have been in a relationship with a very imbalanced power dynamic; someone may have had the power to punish you? In & out the hospital as a child or a very big medical incident. Working in medical (specifically getting nursing) or as a coach, trainer. Surgeries & surgical scars (especially emergency surgery to save your life), medical implants & devices, physically disabled. SH scars. Past attempt on one’s life. Unwilling to feel emotion in fear of getting swept away by them. Stoic on the outside, emotional inside. Always trying to “solve” your emotions

░░░

[kilibaggins]

WAYS TO HELP PALESTINE. FREE PALESTINE. DO WHAT YOU CAN.

I apologize for not being active to speak up this week during the strike like I've tried to be in the past. I'm not as active on Tumblr as I am on Twitter so it slipped my mind to be posting here about things since I usually don't post here in general.

I decided I'd make a post sharing different ways that you can help the people of Gaza, including ways to do so without donating to the families in need directly. This list includes options that are possible without money along with things that you can give money to to help. Even if you can't give money, you CAN spread the word for all of these things for free and while helping. Your voice matters.

ARAB.ORG

The first way that you (yes. you!) can help is by following the link below to be able to do a daily click that is able to help the people of Palestine. There will also be a link to their information on how it works if you're interested in that. Not only can you click to help Palestine, you can also click to help other causes which helps in general as well.

CLICK TO HELP

HOW IT WORKS

HIND'S HALL BY MACKLEMORE

"If the west was pretending that you didn't exist, you'd want the word to stand up, and the Students finally did."

You may have heard of Macklemore's new song HIND'S HALL, written about the current atrocities happening to the people in Gaza and in support of the students protesting, but did you know that the money that comes from streaming the song is going to UNRWA? You can stream this song for free and all the proceeds will be going to UNRWA (which, by the way, you can donate to directly: HERE).

I've heard from many comments and posts that the streams only count on Spotify if 1.) It is not completely muted, and 2.) There's a song (or two) played in between. This way Spotify will count each stream as a stream towards the song and allow for Macklemore to donate the proceeds.

HIND'S HALL - MACKLEMORE [Spotify] (Also on Youtube, Amazon Music, Apple Music, and Others)

CREATORS FOR PALESTINE!

There's also the Creators for Palestine Fundraiser! A ton of different creators, including some of my favorites, are getting together to raise money for the PCRF (and more!).

"Creators for Palestine is raising money for Palestine Children's Relief Fund, a registered 501 non-governmental organization established in 1992."

"With the current state Gaza is in, we are looking to urgently raise $1M to address humanitarian needs and immediate relief, including providing essential medical treatment/supplies, food, clean water, and other necessities for families affected by the genocide."

While you may not be able to donate to them, amplifying their voices, amplifying posts about this fundraiser, etc. Can help spread the word enough that more people CAN donate.

CHADCHAD'S TWEET

JARVIS JOHNSON'S TWEET

FUNDRAISER LINK

WATCH VIDEOS

Speaking of creators, creators on TikTok have made it their goal to donate funds made by you watching their videos, listening to their sounds, etc. Search on TikTok to find these videos, these creators, these sounds, and interact as much as possible. You can do this by especially going through the Pass The Hat Hashtag and helping those who are speaking up about specific families in need.

#PASSTHEHAT on TikTok

Now, onto places, organizations, and people you can donate to.

PASS THE HAT

Speaking of Pass The Hat, I will link to a video by a creator on TikTok named Erin who has started this wonderful initiative. Basically, this initiative is being used to have TikTok and Instagram creators 'adopt a family' in Gaza so that they can speak up for that family and get as many donations as possible. While you may not be able to donate, going through the videos made by people that are a part of this initiative and watching them, interacting with them, and focusing on them, will allow their videos to be pushed to people who may be able to help more than you can. And that alone is life changing.

ERIN HATTAMER on TikTok

PROJECT PASS THE HAT VIDEO

OPERATION OLIVE BRANCH

While Erin is amazing for doing what she's done here, she has also made sure to amplify the voices of Operation Olive Branch and made sure to tell everyone that Operation Olive Branch, a Grassroots movement to organize & promote the safety and wellbeing of families in Palestine, was the operation to truly kickstart all of this. Operation Olive Branch has a TikTok account, which I will be linking, along with a cohesive google spreadsheet of families that are in need.

The spreadsheet has hundreds of families that are in need and includes links to their fundraisers, their goals, the names and ages of the family, and social media links. Each family is put into their own category such as Medical/Disabled, Mutual Aid, Gazan Heroes, etc. Along with a Master list of all of them. The main navigation page has many different recourses and links as well.

OPERATION OLIVE BRANCH on TikTok

FAQ VIDEO on TikTok

LINKTREE

THE SPREADSHEET

Here are some more specific sources and then I'll add different threads of GoFundMe's.

CARE FOR GAZA

Care for Gaza is, in their own words, a Non-Governmental, Non-Profit charity in aid of helping the needy families of Palestine. You can find all of the links I can find for them below including their GoFundMe, PayPal, and their Twitter account. Care For Gaza is a non-profit helping the people in Gaza survive day by day by supplying food, hygiene products, etc. to the people in Gaza with little to nothing. All over their Twitter they continue to post pictures of the products they have and videos of the people they are able to help continuously due to the donations they receive.

CARE FOR GAZA on Twitter

GOFUNDME [€849,343 of €1,000,000]

PAYPAL

ESIMS FOR GAZA

ESims For Gaza is another effort, which is being run by Mirna El Helbawi. She has been accepting eSims donations and distributing them to journalists and other people in need of them and there have been over 1 thousand eSims distributed. Even the smallest amount helps those in need and you can help people in Gaza continue to get in contact with their families.

MIRNA EL HELBAWI on Twitter

ESIMS FOR GAZA WEBSITE

NOMAD

HOLAFLY

SIMLY

AIRALO

Now, onto the GoFundMe's.

GOFUNDME'S

There are many Twitter Threads going through and listing so many different GoFundMe's for the people in need of escaping Rafah. Some of them may repeat some GoFundMe's but I still believe these threads will be helpful to allow you to find some families in desperate need. Here are a few threads (let it be known I do not know the people who I'm sharing threads from!):

ONE

TWO

THREE

FOUR

There is also this GOOGLE DOCUMENT that has a list of different GoFundMe's and other donation sites.

Listen, I know this was a lot. But that's why I felt it important for it all to be in one place. There are hundreds of posts on Twitter, Tumblr, everywhere, that collects information for you like this. You just have to take the time to share it, to read it, to understand that you are not powerless in all of this. This post does not have everything, but I thought it could be a good start.

These people need our help. They need anything that we can give them and the least you can do is share around information and resources so those that can help know where to go. So that people know what is going on right now in the world.

Free Palestine.

[siasthoughts]

« I'M THE ONE YOU ALWAYS NEED. »

CONCEPT; MORTEFI X F!READER . YOU WENT TO HIM TO ASK HIM TO INVENT SOMETHING.

TOPICS/WARNINGS; USING TOYS . QUICK ORAL (F!RECEIVING) . ATP IDK . NGL THIS FEELS LIKE A DRABBLE . P IN V . PROBABLY OOC

IM PLAYING WUTHERING WAVES AND IM IN LOVE W SO MANY OF THEM N R PLANNING SOME FICS 💞 also should i start writing on ao3 hehe

WORD COUNT; 1.5K

"hey..." you voiced awkwardly as you tapped your knuckles at his open office door, catching his attention. "yes, do you need anything?" he asks, turning towards you and putting down his tablet. you walk into the office nervously, "you said i could ask you if i needed anything made, right?" you questioned, averting your gaze and looking around the room. "yes... i did say that." he looks at you, crossing his arms as he observed your anxious expression. you gulped quietly, swallowing your pride as you really can't seem to find anyone that sells these things... "have you ever made a..."

his eyes widen slightly at your inquiry, a replica of male genitalia? he clears his throat, holding up his fist to his mouth as he took a few moments to think before speaking up, "well no but... i couldn't say that anyone ever asked either." he turns back around to his desk and sends the current hologram he's working on into his drafts before starting a new project, "so... can you?" you asked for reassurance, tilting your head to get a view of the hologram.

he turns to you, leaning on his desk as he looks down at you with rested eyes, you could feel that you've definitely piqued his interest with your 'invention idea.' "have you ever considered just finding someone to be able to..." his voice lowers, "-use the real thing?" he leans down just a bit, but enough for you to get what he's insinuating. "well sure, in a way." you answered, your voice tensing up.

"oh really?" he retreats back, bringing up his hand to push his glasses back, "which person have you thought of?" he interrogated, seemingly trying to pry a certain answer out of you. you look away, staying silent for a few moments he breaks the silence with a small sigh, "well, it's understandable if you wish to not answer. but, i'll try to make that for you. expect it by the end of the day."

he sure works quick. a relieved exhale, even though embarassment still ran through your body, huffs out of your lips as he turns back to his desk. "t-thank you." you stammer nervously as you swiftly made your way out without exchanging any last words with the red haired researcher.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

as you were just getting ready to leave the laboratory, you hear a certain voice call out from behind you. you turn to see a familiar figure with gold-rimmed glasses—mortefi, and he was holding a paper bag.

you feel heat rise to your face as you remember what you just asked of him. "here's what you requested." he walks over to you, holding up the bag as his tablet rested within his other hand. "oh... you really made one." your hands trembled slightly as you took the bag, feeling shame wash over you. "oh, and sorry if it might not be to your best liking, i used... my own as a slight reference." he said as he closed his eyes for a few moments before looking back up at you.

shock runs through you for a few moments before you smiled awkwardly at him, "oh- okay. thanks a lot though!" you tried to force an enthusiastic answer, failing miserable as your voice cracked a bit. "well then, i guess it's time to head home and have fun, no?" he said rather coldly, and with a straight face as he eyed you. well that felt rather insulting. you laughed sheepishly as you clenched onto the paper bag.

you thought about it for a while, if it's like his... why not just use the actual reference?

"sir... have you ever bothered doing these things with someone?" you asked, making the tension even more unbearable and uncomfortable. his eyes narrowed as he looked at you, certain conclusions and thoughts already being formed in his head. "yes, in a way." he answered, seemingly mocking your words from earlier. "then..." you took a small breath, "would you mind using this with me?" your voice shakes as your grip on the bag tightens.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

well fuck.

he now knelt in between your thighs, with your legs over his shoulders, taking in your most sensitive parts as you sat over his desk. "i suppose we need to make your body ready first, right?" he voiced hoarsely, how is he doing this with a stern and cold expression? you swallow a breath as you looked at his calm gaze, "y-yes." you stuttered in a failed attempt to seem composed.

he took off his glasses, and placing it on his cold table before placing a warm, wet kiss onto your core, making your body shiver. you looked down at him as he strategically worked his mouth around you. he held onto your thighs, keeping you stable as his tongue gently worked around your folds, preparing your body and riling up it's appetite. your legs lock his head within your thighs, pulling him closer to your pussy. "mm..." he groaned out, making him frown a bit though he didn't really... dislike it.

"sorry..." you mumbled quietly, loosening your grip as he pulls back, and getting back up "it's very much okay and reasonable." he assures as he reaches for the bag and takes out it's contents. you shift your gaze to what's now in his hands, he used his own as reference?! it was lengthy, and he brought it down to your already wet cunt. "are you ready?" he asked, positioning the dildo against your drooling pussy, "yes." you whined quietly, looking down at the silicone toy.

"alright, i'm gonna do it slowly, okay?" he assured, his voice was low as he slowly pushed it in, starting with the tip. he kept his attention down towards your hole, observing the way it clenched desperately around the fake cock. he clenched his jaw as he slowly pushed it further, earning him a small moan from you as he felt his pants tighten. well shit.

he notices the now growing bulge in his pants as he pushes the entire thing into you gently, "is it okay?" he asks, looking back up at your now pleasure-washed face. it turned him even more. "absolutely..." you responded breathily as you looked down to see his aching cock hiding under the fabric of his pants. "i'll move it now." he thrusted the toy in and out slowly, hearing the wet noises as your pussy resisted against the movement.

he groans, feeling extremely jealous of the silicone figure within his hands. you moaned at the sensation electrifying you, shooting shots of pleasure into your veins as his hands sped up. your body shook as he started to get rougher, now slamming it into you as a knot formed quickly within your core.

"i-i'm getting close..." you mewled out as your legs instinctively closed themselves, and your back arching as his hand kept themselves on your hip to keep you stable. you cry out as you feel the pleasure wash over you, that knot breaking apart as you feel warm liquid spill out of your pussy, making your legs weak. "ah..." he muttered as he slowly pulled it out, feeling the fabric encasing his own heat now tighten even more as it hurts.

you look down at it, a small smile tugging at the corners of your lips as you look up at him, "better if it's the real thing, no?" you said with a dazed laugh as you wrap your legs around his waist. "is this permission?" he asks with eager eyes as he put the dildo aside and his hands slowly undid his pants. "mhm..." you hummed, and even though you just finished, you felt excited for the real thing.

he laughed quietly as he let his pants fall a bit, revealing his twitching dick. it was desperate for your gaping hole, the way it squeezed on the dildo made him all frustrated for some reason. he wanted to feel it for himself. "i'm sorry, dear, i can't wait." he apologizes before pushing himself slowly but firmly into you. he groans at the feeling, your walls tightened against him and sending his body into euphoria as he feels his control over his body slowly dissipate.

you let out a staggered breath, though the smile returns to your lips as you find it in you to make some teasing remarks. "feels good, doesn't it?" you whisper as your hand moves up to cradle his face. "yes..." he says huskily as he couldn't find the strength to move. "what's wrong? why can't you move?" you voiced rather condescendingly as you start to circle your hips against him.

he frowns as his body twitches at your motion, with his grip on your waist deepening. you feel his fingers dig into your soft skin, making you feel a bit confident of your skills. mortefi hisses through his teeth as he slowly started to move, his length leaving your insides empty for a few moments before burying himself back inside you.

a small cry escapes your lips as you feel his cock fill your empty hole, and your body reacts as if it was running on desire. you reach for his back, your arms travel down his waist, stopping just at the hill of his hips. you push him further into you as sounds of pleasure quickly filled the room, echoing through the empty walls. you're both so lucky that everybody's gone.

you claw at his clothes, feeling as if you were ripping the white fabric apart, you whine out his name as you feel that familiar feeling boil up within your body. and you were sure he could feel it too. "are you close?" you asked breathily as his pace started to speed up, rougher, and harder. "so... tight." he frowns as he ravishes in the pleasure, letting it devour him as he continues to ram himself into you.

"i'm so close-" he scowls, his other hand roaming the skin of your stomach as he takes in the view under him. your vision slowly fades to white as you feel your mind go blank, losing your control over your body as you feel that sensation shatter, sending shards of pleasure all across your body. your body uncontrollably trembles under his touch as he pulls out swiftly with a groan and pressing his dick against your cunt, grinding into his climax.

you feel a sticky, warm liquid spill across your stomach and the soft plush of your pussy.

okay it's all up to u now guys 🤑

you have reached the end of this post

→ HOME?

[dollypopup]

I think it's interesting to look at the 'Mr. Bridgerton' scene as a backdrop for the eventual mirror scene. Firstly, in the fact that I think we've kind of misinterpreted it.

So many people are of the mind that scene's purpose to 'drag' Colin, but really, that scene has 3 primary functions. The first is to inform Colin that Penelope is aware of what he said of her, thus opening the door to clearing the air between them and providing an avenue for which Colin can apologize. The second is to establish the ground that they are currently on: Penelope has given up on the dream of Colin Bridgerton, in particular the perfect prince that can do no wrong, and has made it clear to him. It also creates distance between them that they will bridge.

But the third, and to me the most wrapped up in the mirror and the inner workings of their relationship is that it reveals how Penelope feels about *herself*. It's not necessarily an echo of what the ton considers her as, after all, we have a lot of evidence indicating that, for all intents and purpose, people aren't *unkind* about her, but rather that they ignore her. Audience members recognize this as Penelope's own shyness being the cause, she is often sitting off on the sidelines or not really talking to much of anyone, in the books she's referred to as the 'one who doesn't speak', and her LW business takes her away from being a character in the action of the ton to a bystander, kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy of sorts that perpetuates itself. Pen felt unseen so she became LW to have some power, but then LW herself must remain unseen and Penelope continues to be by design of her own making.

No, I think what it really reveals is that Penelope has incredibly low personal self esteem. We as a fandom has lauded that scene as her dragging Colin, saying that he's cruel and calling him Mr. Bridgerton is absolutely meant to create distance between them, but I don't think she's dragging him.

Because the person she is *actually* dragging here. . .is herself. And it is a general theme in her life. In Whistledown. Aloud. Even with Marina, when she complimented her, she assumes that she's lying. When Edwina says she's wearing a pretty dress, Penelope puts herself down and doesn't believe her, even when the compliment is genuine. In truth, Portia is not seen as being particularly unkind to Penelope. At least, speaking as someone who's mum was *awful* about my size and weight and outfits, Portia is. . .overall rather mild. She's not KIND and loving, not by a long shot, but she's also not targeting Penelope only. She's plenty mean and critical to Prudence, too, even to the point where she foists her off to her own cousin as a pawn piece. Penelope has low self esteem because of a lot of reasons, she's bullied by Cressida (I think a lot of girls are, she was pretty mean even to Daphne in S1) and her family isn't very tender to her, and she's not being pursued at every turn, but part of it is also her own perpetuation.

Listen to what she says "Of course you would never court me" "I embarrass you" "I am the laughingstock of the the ton". She sees *herself* as an embarrassment. She puts *herself* down. Arguably, more so than the ton does. She's meaner to herself than anyone else is, aside from Cressida. And honestly? Looking at Colin's face there. . .he is HURT that she considers herself this way. That she's projecting that onto him. Yes, he's hurt that he hurt her, of course he is, he never wants to hurt her. And yes, he's ashamed that he said he wouldn't court her the way he did and that in doing so, he validated her fears that she is unloved and unwanted, but also because. . .she already feels that way about herself. She's felt that way for years. And it's painful to care about someone, to see them as wonderful, and realize. . .they don't feel the same about themselves at all. I don't think Colin is out here feeling so wounded over the fact that she called him cruel and won't refer to him by first name anymore, but that he's most hurt by what she says about herself.

Because he *doesn't* see her the way she accuses. She says she never expected him of all people to be so cruel, but he feels the same way. He never expected her to be so cruel to *herself*. He wants to go somewhere private, not because she is an embarrassment, but because he wants to have a private conversation with her. Maybe assure her. Maybe explain himself. Maybe hash it out. But god Luke Newton's acting. . .he is *aching* for her. And it feels like he's going to do those lessons not in atonement for what he said (thank god) but to genuinely help his friend who thinks badly of herself. To lift her up. It's not about him at all, not about earning forgiveness, but about elevating Penelope. And that's. . .fuck, I just find that's just so heart stoppingly beautiful.

You can see, in that scene, how much he cares about her. How deeply and genuinely he adores her as a person. And just how painful it is for him to know he has validated, whether on purpose or otherwise, how poorly she feels about herself. How low her self-confidence really is. She is giving him a glimpse into the cracks of her heart, and when he sees them, he wants to reach out with both hands and make it feel better. Make her feel better.

After she says 'even when I change my entire wardrobe', he looks so fucking crushed. So 'don't say that'. So 'you really believe that?'. So 'God, I hate that you think that way'.

Because regardless of it all, he does love her. It's not romantic yet. It's not sexual yet. But he genuinely, truly, from the bottom of his heart, thinks she's wonderful. That was evident even in the 'purpose' scene. Every time Penelope opens up and reveals a facet of herself, he likes it. He likes her barbs and her dreams, he likes talking to her. He likes her. And he feels awful that he hurt her. And he feels awful that she's hurting herself. He loves her. He wants her to love herself.

And that's where the mirror scene comes in. Because the mirror scene isn't about sex, not really. Not entirely, at least. The mirror scene is about *intimacy*. The mirror scene is about being seen. Not just her seeing him, or him seeing her, but for Penelope to see *herself*. In a way, through his eyes. Because hers are biased rather negatively toward herself, which is evidenced in the 'Goodnight Mr. Bridgerton' scene, and in so many little moments we've already gotten where she's literally looking down on herself, feeling down. She doesn't necessarily *like* what's in the mirror, but he does. Because he likes *her*. And he wants to show her that he does. Show her that he finds her beautiful and have her recognize that in herself.

The 'Goodnight Mr. Bridgerton' scene is about Penelope revealing how she sees herself. The mirror scene is about Colin showing her how *he* sees her. The Goodnight scene is about Penelope thinking she means nothing to him, that he thinks of her the way she thinks of herself, that this is how everyone thinks of her, and the mirror scene is a direct response to that: No, he doesn't. No, he doesn't think she's embarrassing. No, he doesn't think she's a laughingstock. No, he doesn't think she's unappealing. And he doesn't think she should, either.

And he's going to show her that. Not just tell her, but show her. The mirror scene is so often a focus on Penelope, so much of Polin is in Penelope's focus, but approaching it from Colin's perspective and his motivations is so fulfilling, too. It's a glimpse into them in conversation, and a demonstrate of how Colin loves her. How Colin loves in general, openly and earnestly and altruistically. How he encourages her to be braver and more confident in herself, bolstering her because he just likes her *that much*. How he finds the most fulfillment and satisfaction in caring aloud. The mirror scene is a demonstration of his heart in reflection.

When Luke Newton said the first word that came to mind with the word 'Mirror' was 'Exposed', he doesn't just mean physically. He means emotionally, too.

God this couple is so fucking good.

[phlurrii]

It’s finally time to introduce the secondary project I’ve been working on >;Dc

I’ve had this queued for sometime in June, did not check when, so hello on [random date in june] ;D

I’m also here to explain how I’ll be posting this stuff going forward! Everything will be posted here, on my main account before being reblogged over to Soul’s Anchor a side bog with the place holder title. Unless it deals with more adult/suggestive content or heavier topics, of which will be exclusively posted to Soul’s Anchor side blog. As I don’t want certain themes alongside AM! I’ll also be referring to this series as Anchor for short! I will encourage any and all Questions, Mentions, and Thoughts to be directed there for those interested and those who are not, dw! You’ll only see the initial posts here, no asks or follows up, but this is still my art account and I shall enjoy it as I please ;3

Brief Synopsis about the Story:

A queer love story following a cursed pirate and a cult refugee implanted with a god’s eye as they combat the reality of living in a world which was created solely to feed the gods that govern it. All whilst a sapphic couple attempt to help guide the pair along a path to to a better future, one that’s validity comes into question. A dark fantasy story that aims to represent the disabled community, the LGBTQIA+, and SA survivors written by fellow members of these communities.

Also brief disclaimer, I, Phlurrii, am simply an ally to the disabled community, my partner in crime writing alongside me, ArtJunco on Instagram, is our resident community member ;]

Anyways onto the meat of this!

Below is a collection of some, emphasis on some, of the concept art and processes I went through to develop and create one of the two main characters, Lumae.

Here are some of the earliest ideas, the basic thoughts I had in my brain when developing this goober after a 3 hours pacing in my kitchen at 1 am when that inspiration struck. His hair was the HARDEST bit for me to figure out. Which sucked as usually the hair is one of the first things I figure out because of how much I love it, so it was Agony while brainstorming that part.

I also briefly considered a goatee, however it was so cruelly shot down by my dear friend. So in stead we compromised that he may get one later down the line story wise… and see how we feel then. However, upon finally figuring out his hair I was bloody elated, still has some tweaks now and then, but the base is there.

As for this next concept, this was actually the FIRST thing created for Lumae and what started everything else about his character/design! His eyes! They are still my favourite but about him and something I adore whole heartedly! They are the core of his character ;3c

These next few are early refs and mock ups of his full design, testing our colours, experimenting with shading, getting used to drawing humans again, and general concepts I had for him as a character! Also a sneak peak at Ayric, our second main goober for this story! Who was lovingly designed and created by ArtJunco!

And finally his most recent WIP ref! The only thing currently bothering me about his design is the colour for his boot covers, I have no idea what to do with them so I’d you have suggestion or ideas, sincerely, feel free to shoot an ask to the Anchor blog! I’d genuinely love outside opinions!

As for the main curiosity of why I’m doing this, for those that missed the last post, I’ll give a brief explanation below ;3

To help with burnout so I can hop between fixations, help to avoid losing interest in AM in the future!

Keep up practicing humans and critters alike.

To take a break from story telling to do story building! Give the telling part of my brain a break, while still making cool stuff ;]

To have a more interactive blog with ya’ll! One where I’ll likely be asking advice and discussing a lot more hypotheticals, doodling asks, and general audience interaction given I am not bound by any updates! Purely just “ooo… shiny-“ and anyone is welcome to join me ;D

Last thing I request is to please read Anchor’s blog bio/description before you follow, as this story will deal with subjects not suited for all audiences posted/discussed exclusively on that blog.

Anywho, that’s all for now folks, hope you enjoyed this brief intermission to kickoff the second project being public!

[aesethewitch]

When Witching Goes Wrong: Basics

Not all spells that go wrong are “backfires.” A backfire occurs when a spell’s result is antithetical to the result you wanted to cause — it causes a negative outcome, often coming back onto you as the caster, but sometimes creating the opposite effect as was desired on the target. For example, casting a money attraction spell and losing a wallet full of cash as a result would be considered a backfire. A spell that fizzles, does nothing, or produces an unexpected (but not negative) side-effect wouldn’t be a backfire (in my opinion, that is).

Most spells that go wrong aren’t backfires. In general, you’re likelier to have a spell that acts unexpectedly or that simply fizzles than one that blows up in your face somehow. You shouldn’t be anxious about a backfire. But, as someone with lots of experience in the realm of worrying about worst-case scenarios, I understand the impulse.

The solution is to understand what can go wrong, how to prevent it, and what to do in the event of an actual worst-case scenario. My goal with this post (and with this WWGW series) is to help you feel less anxious about spells going wrong and more prepared to deal with whatever comes your way.

So, let’s start from the beginning.

Outcome Projection

Risk assessment, mitigation, and management. Fellow corporate drones (former or current) will know exactly what I’m talking about here. The idea is to predict possible ways that things can go wrong and either prevent them entirely or put strategies in place to deal with them ahead of time. It’s damage control before the damage occurs.

Now, the key here is to not go overboard. Fellow chronic worriers will know the horrible allure of going down every possible path of anxiety, only to find ourselves paralyzed entirely by the fear that something will go wrong. Remember that most spells do not backfire. In most cases, the worst thing (and most common negative outcome, in my experience) that can happen is that nothing happens. The next most common is unexpected side effects, but those are usually easily dealt with.

The goal is to ensure the success of the spell. For example, when you’re looking for a new place to live, you don’t want to just look for the number of bedrooms and the finishes in the kitchen. You want to account for the appliances, the heating/cooling systems, the quality of the flooring, signs of water damage, signs of mold… all sorts of things.

A similar concept applies to accounting for backfires/failures in spellwork. You want to close loopholes and think about the outcomes you specifically don’t want — and then incorporate ways to prevent those things from happening.

The Ways Spells Can Go Wrong

The spell fully backfires. By “fully backfires,” I mean that it completely fails and creates the exact opposite outcome to what you were going for. Using a love spell as an example, this could include the target leaving your life, forming negative opinions of you, or becomes interested in someone else (particularly if you were trying to pull attention from that someone else onto yourself).

The spell is bounced back to you. This is more unusual than you think! I often see the warning about spells being redirected back at the caster in arguments against hexing and cursing others. I’ve had exactly one spell reversed back at me, and it was because the target was 1. A witch, and 2. Expecting it.

The spell’s primary result is unexpected. Not necessarily bad, just not what you meant to do. For example, casting a spell to get a promotion at work and discovering that your close friend is getting a promotion instead.

The spell has unexpected side effects. Like casting a spell for good luck on yourself and having everyone around you experience good luck, too. Or casting a spell that successfully improves your workplace’s vibe, only to find out that the mean coworker nobody likes finally got fired, and that’s why everyone is more relaxed and cheerful. Or, more negatively, you do get that promotion you cast for, but now you’re saddled with more work than you can handle, because your bosses think you’re highly capable of it all!

The spell does absolutely nothing. Perhaps one of the more common ways a spell can go wrong, this is exactly what it says on the tin. You put the energy in, you did all the steps, but the spell just… doesn’t go anywhere. In other words, it fizzles and simply doesn’t work at all.

As with most topics in witchcraft, there’s an infinite amount of nuance to apply here. There are more ways spells can go wrong, and not all of these things would necessarily be considered “going wrong.”

It may be worth deducing why the spell went wrong. Was it the materials? The petition or incantation? A lack of energy, or maybe an overabundance? Spirit influence? Protections surrounding the target? Knowing what exactly went wrong can help you prevent the same issues in the future, but it can also help you to better fix the spell in the moment.

Preventatives

The particulars are going to depend heavily on your personal practice, the type of spell you’re doing, and how detailed you want to get. These suggestions are based on things I personally take into account when I’m trying to close loopholes and prevent unwanted outcomes.

Be specific in your wording. Especially if your spell has any kind of spoken or written component, be as specific as you can. “Draw money to me” is a general sentiment that could absolutely work, but what money is it bringing in? A bonus at work? A dollar on the street? A gift from grandma? Inheritance? It could be anything at that point. “Draw good, repeat customers to my small business to help me reach my profit goal of $10,000 before the end of the year” is specific, focused, and measurable. There isn’t much room for surprise side effects.

Choose ingredients carefully. Work with ingredients whose purposes you know. In my spell recipes, I list every ingredient’s correspondence, because in my practice, those things matter. Ensure that the “active ingredients” in your spell align with your goal properly. Rogue elements create rogue effects!

Include failsafe measures. As in, create ways you can cancel the spell at any point. This can have the side effect of making your spells easier to undo, particularly if your target is also a witch who understands how you construct your spells. If doing this, it’s best to create a method that is obscured and unique to you.

Add ingredients or instructions specifically to avoid particular side effects or outcomes. Find a component or two that can protect your working from unwanted effects, backfires, and interference. Include instructions for the spell for things it shouldn’t do. For example, trying to create issues for one particular person at work shouldn’t harm their innocent teammates.

Undo It

The first step to consider is undoing the spell. Not all paradigms allow for this, so it may not be possible for you. For me, it depends on the particular spell and how much change it’s created. The bigger the impact, the less likely a simple undo will work.

Still, it’s worth a try. Undoing a spell might take a few forms, depending on how you originally cast it:

Take the spell apart. Disassemble the spell into its components and cleanse them of the spell’s energy.

Destroy the vessel and components. Burning, tearing, burying, flushing, throwing away, and so forth. Be careful to not bury things that could harm the earth, animals, or people — including glass, salt, and plastics. Compost and recycle when you can.

Dismiss spirits working within the spell. End the contract around the spell’s working and request that the spirits stop powering it. You could also request their assistance in undoing the spell. You may have to make offerings either way, depending on the terms of your agreement.

Perform the spell in reverse. This includes speaking incantations backwards, performing all actions backwards, taking components apart, re-cleansing, and putting things away where you originally got them from.

Draw the spell’s energy/effects out of the target’s body and/or the affected area. Using energy work, absorb the spell’s energy into a vessel. Capture it and either allow it to dissipate or bottle it up to keep it in check. I don’t recommend absorbing the energy into yourself, as that may draw the spell’s unwanted effects to you (or make them worse).

I typically employ a combination of strategies to undo a spell, if it’s possible in the first place. If it’s a simple spell, performing it in reverse is the easiest method. I’ll then cleanse, destroy, and dispose of the materials.

But when it isn’t possible to simply undo the spell…

Cast Another Spell

…The answer might be to cast another one. In my mind, there are several ways to do this.

The first is to cast a spell to negate the original’s effects completely. I would approach this method the same way as any other spell. Focus on the effects you’re looking to negate, and cast accordingly. A banishing spell would work well for this to shoo away the spell’s energy, but a cleansing spell to clear the target would also work. Or, you can get more specific. For example, if a spell has generated a string of unlucky events, you could cast a spell for good luck in order to nullify the bad luck of the first spell. The goal would be to cancel out the original spell’s effects in some way.

The second way is to cast a spell to adjust the original’s outcome. There are a lot of ways to do this. You could directly modify the original spell by adding or removing ingredients that might’ve caused the negative outcome, redo written or spoken incantations/petitions, or cast a “companion spell” to redirect the original’s energy to a more favorable end. For example, in a money spell that’s giving everyone else good fortune, you could place a magnet with your personal information on it atop the spell vessel to draw money to you rather than the people around you. The idea here is not to end the original spell, but to realign it to your particular needs.

Another way is to cast a spell specifically to control side effects. Sometimes, a spell can’t be undone, and you can’t easily modify the main outcomes (particularly true if the negative events caused by the spell happen quickly or outside your control). Or maybe the bulk of the spell worked properly, but there’s one or two minor negative side effects you don’t want to continue. The method for this would be similar to adjusting the original spell’s outcome, but on a smaller scale and in a less direct fashion. For example, your job spell got you that promotion, hooray! But now you’re stressed out by training someone to take your place, and you’re learning your new position. You can cast a spell to reduce stress or prevent people from piling additional work on you while you adjust, controlling the side effects of the promotion.

A way I use for high-stakes spells is to cast wards or other protections before casting the main spell to prevent backfire or unwanted effects ahead of time. I often do this for spells surrounding situations that are delicate or that need extra care. In my case, it’s a general, long-term ward against bad luck on a wider scale, and it catches negative spell side effects as part of its job. You can set up temporary wards if you prefer, or make them for very specific purposes. Whatever works for you.

Cast the same spell again. This isn’t my usual go-to, unless I’m trying a new spell method or ingredient I’m unfamiliar with. I’ll usually recommend trying the same spell again when the first casting does absolutely nothing, since multiple castings can make a spell stronger and more effective. However, if a spell backfires or otherwise causes undesirable effects, I wouldn’t really recommend it, as the negative effects can compound, too, if it misfires again.

Ask for Help

If the problems caused by your spell are too big for you to handle on your own, it’s okay to reach out for help! Whether you’re looking for suggestions and advice or hands-on assistance, knowing when and how to ask for help is a critical skill.

Ask the witchcraft community (or your witchy friends) questions. Join a Discord, forum, Tumblr community, or other witchy space. Make a post to explain your situation and request suggestions, advice, and ideas to deal with the situation at large. Not all suggestions will be entirely helpful, but you’ll at least get some new perspectives to shed light on your situation. If people you know directly (in real life or online) practice witchcraft, see what they think.

Chat with spirits. Especially if you already work with spirits or if spirits helped you to cast/power the original spell, this can be a solid way to come up with a solution that will work. Use your preferred method of communication to discuss the situation. If possible, see if they’ll help you either undo or mitigate the spell’s unwanted results.

Ask non-witchy friends for advice. Their advice will probably be mundane, but sometimes, those are the best solutions. Outside perspectives are useful to recontextualize problems and come up with solutions you wouldn’t have otherwise considered.

Find books, videos, tutorials, blog posts, and other resources on the subject. When all else fails, or when you’re a little shy about asking for help directly, there are still resources out there to help you solve your dilemmas. Just remember to vet your sources before naively following instructions given to you.

Deal with Consequences Mundanely

Sometimes, there’s just nothing for it. Whether you don’t have time and energy or you’ve already tried more magic and had it fail, there are times when you have to turn to the mundane. Depending on the severity of the situation you’re in, solutions will vary in their successfulness. And honestly, that’s just how it is sometimes. Sometimes, things don’t wrap up nicely and easily and neatly.

With that said, here are a handful of mundane responses and solutions I’ve turned to after spells went wrong (and couldn’t be otherwise fixed):

Come clean and apologize. Particularly applicable when you’re doing a spell on or for another person, sometimes, there’s just nothing else to do but admit you fucked up. If the person impacted by the spell’s effects, directly or indirectly, isn’t a magical practitioner themselves, you could simply apologize for meddling in the situation. On the other hand, if you’ve harmed or offended a spirit with your spellwork, you might make an offering to apologize for the trouble you’ve caused.

Come up with mundane strategies for damage control. Depending on how severe the spell’s negative effects are, the level of effort for this is going to obviously vary. It could be anything from redoing your household budget to breaking out the toolbox for repairs to building an actual fence to making dinner. Your solution is going to depend on your problem. Think strategically.

Seek out new, improved coping mechanisms. Whether you’re looking to resolve feelings that are caused by the spell’s backfire or ones that made you cast in the first place, sometimes, a bit of self-care is the best solution. Consider why you cast the spell in the first place — lack of control, poor self-worth, low confidence? Or was it just because you felt it could help you with a little boost to the work you were already doing? It’s worth thinking about. What mundane safety nets do you have in place?

Let it go. Perhaps the most difficult option: Just letting the bad result be. Moving on from it. Taking the lumps and the lesson, and walking away. Giving up is a skill. It’s not a moral failing to let things go. If fighting will only make things worse, or if you’re tired of trying to fix it, it’s okay to just… let it be a failure.

Conclusions

Again, this is far from comprehensive. The suggestions here are basic ideas to help inspire you to form your own opinions and solutions. It’s smart to consider these things in advance! As my mother always says, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.

I have plans to expand the idea of “When Witching Goes Wrong” into a wider series of posts, each focusing on a very specific problem, spell type, or solution (like a post just about ways to undo a spell, for example). Those are likely to include true stories about things I’ve personally fucked up… which are always the best witchy stories, in my opinion. Lol.

If you're interested in more WWGW entries, check out the masterpost.

Anyhow! If you got something out of this post or my other work, consider tossing a couple dollars in my tip jar. Support goes toward bills and keeping our household fed and healthy, so it’s very much appreciated. Supporters got to see this post a full week early!

If there’s a particular subject you want to see covered, feel free to send me an ask or leave a comment on this post (or any of the posts in the series!). As long as it’s something I actually have experience with, I’m happy to cover just about anything.

[irkimatsu]

How about this: Reader has big breasts (not in an exaggerated way but they are big) and Husk loves to have his face between them or suck on them when he's stressed... Mhmh, I just imagine this man between my breasts~

Husk deserves some big fat tits to worship~

Husk/Reader featuring Husk sucking on some breasts while he's drunk as shit. Gonna say NSFW, there may be no genitalia mentions but titty sucking is still the whole point. About 2k words!

---

Husk enters the room in the hotel you’ve been sharing with him for the past few months, clearly in a rotten mood. He’s swaying slightly as he clutches a bright green bottle, and the instant he opens the door, the reek of booze assaults your senses. To be fair, you’re not sure you’ve ever seen him completely sober, but he’s even further gone than you’re used to.

“Fuckin’ Al… fuckin’ heaven…fuckin’ hotel…” He slams the door behind him as he takes a swig from his bottle. He coughs after his gulp, but it doesn’t stop him from taking another sip. You recognize the label on the bottle; it’s one of those strong drinks that are meant for intoxication rather than taste, the kind Husk often likens to shoe polish even as he keeps gulping it down.

A lot has happened around the hotel in the past few weeks, so you’re not surprised that he’s finally snapped; you’re only surprised that it took him this long. You know he loves the hotel and doesn’t truly regret sticking around, but no amount of love for the project and its residents can erase just how damn stressful his situation is, especially recently.

“Are you okay, Husk?” you ask as you lower the book you were reading. “Come on, come to bed.”

He looks at you as you lower the book and let the blanket slip off your chest, and his pupils widen as he makes a feline noise of interest. You’ve chosen quite the revealing nightgown to sleep in tonight. It’s hard to find sleepwear that isn’t revealing given how well-endowed you are, but this one is particularly low-cut, exposing your cleavage and the tops of your breasts to the drunken Sinner’s intrigued eyes.

“Gladly,” he says, his words underlaid with a purr. He takes a moment to finish the bottle of swill he brought with him, then carelessly drops the empty bottle to the carpet before climbing onto the bed from the foot. He crawls toward you like a man on a mission, refusing to let his swaying and blurred vision stop him from getting where he wants. With a satisfied sigh, he drops his chin on top of your breasts and closes his eyes.

“Feeling better?” you ask with a laugh as you gently scratch behind both of his ears.

He purrs in response; whether it’s to your petting or to his current position, you’re not sure. “Much better…” he mumbles. He wraps his arms around you, paws flat on your upper back, and pulls you closer as he nuzzles his face into your cleavage. His tail is waving like an excited kitten’s, and it’s taking you so much not to laugh at his excitement. You know he hates being condescended to, especially about his feline traits, but god his enthusiasm is adorable.

“Mmm… fuckin’ soft…” he says, voice mostly muffled by your chest. His fur tickles your sensitive skin as he nuzzles, as if determined to let every inch of his face feel your divine flesh.

“Do you want more, kitty?” you ask, a playful smirk crawling onto your lips.

“More?” he asks, confusion apparent even though you can’t hear him very well. You’re not sure if the alcohol is the only thing impacting his ability to think right now.

“More…” you repeat seductively as you take the front of your nightgown in one hand and pull it down, letting one breast tumble out of the fabric.

“Mmmn…” He doesn’t move, but you can feel his hot breath quickening against your skin as your breast slips away from his face. He lifts it up with one paw and brings it back into nuzzling range, claws lightly pricking your skin as he does so. Your own breath quickens as the side of his thumb claw rubs back and forth over your exposed nipple, easily bringing it to a hardened peak. He’s quick to determine that one exposed breast isn’t enough. He takes the front of your nightgown and pulls down on it with more force than you gave, tearing it from one of the spaghetti straps in the process. As soon as both of your breasts are exposed, he’s gripping them both firmly, nuzzling in between them as he flexes his claws against them.

“Fuck,” he breathes out as he loses himself in your body. You lightly tilt your head back against the headboard as his rough tongue peeks out from his lips and gives the side of your breast a few gentle laps.

“More,” you urge quietly as you push on the back of his head. He’s happy to comply, face still firmly settled between your breasts as his tongue seeks out every sweet inch of skin that it can. He keeps nuzzling himself even closer, as if that were somehow possible, and his silky fur against your skin is igniting something in you. You don’t want to ask too much of him when he’s in such a foul mood, but on the other hand, if what you have to offer can make him feel better…

“Do you want to kiss me somewhere else?” you ask, still keeping the seduction in your tone.

“I like your tits,” he answers gruffly, tail lashing as he refuses to move from his position.

“I know, I know,” you assure him while petting the back of his head. “Maybe somewhere else on my tits, though…?” You rest your hands over his paws and lightly push his thumb claws back and forth against your peaked nipples, sighing with each pass.

“Ohhh…” He chuckles from his spot buried in your chest, and nuzzles his face into you one more time. “I’ve got ya, baby…” He lifts his head, and wastes no time before he’s suckling one of your breasts. You shudder at his barbed tongue on your nipple, his fangs and claws grazing your skin; being with him is always inevitably a little rough. You know he can’t help it, with the way his body is now. And yet, mixed with the tenderness he always shows you, that incidental roughness just makes you feel even more at ease.

He could hurt you, could do it so easily. But he won’t. He would never.

“So fuckin’ nice…” he groans after he finally comes up for air. He softly chuckles to himself as he jiggles them in his paws, making you laugh in response from the sensation. “Been a long time since I’ve gotten my claws on a pair this fuckin’ nice…”

Maybe now isn’t the time to be talking about his past lovers, but he’s drunk, so you’ll take the compliment as it was intended.

He seems to be stuck in a trance, dilated pupils fixated on your breasts as he weighs them up and down in his paws, velvety pads pressing into the undersides to contrast with the grip of his claws.

“Husk…?” you ask, but he doesn’t seem to hear you; he’s too infatuated with the sight and feel of your chest. You give him a minute, and you’re about to call his name again; but before you can, he growls hungrily and abruptly latches his mouth onto the breast he had neglected earlier.

“So sweet…” he groans as best as he can with his mouth open around your breast. He parts his lips further to get more and more into his mouth, grunting as he strains his jaw. His fangs prick your skin with every suckling motion, stopping him from filling his mouth even further with you, but by god is he going to try. He’s rumbling like a motor, his tail swishing playfully behind him.

You’ve never seen him this blissed out.

“Husk,” you murmur, not expecting any sort of response this time, though his ear does flick in the direction of your voice. You thread your fingers through the thick fur on his cheeks, rest them on the back of his head, and push, pressing him further into your flesh. This only gets him purring louder and swishing faster as he nuzzles into you once more. Not even the fangs bumping into your skin as he clumsily moves his head can ruin how doted on you feel beneath his affection.

Perhaps you should return the favor? You run your hands down the back of his head, down to his neck, and start squeezing where his neck and shoulders meet. He wraps one arm around you and hugs you tight in response, his other paw still tending to the breast that he isn’t currently tasting. He moans into you as you run your hands lower, heading for the sensitive nerves around his wing joints. He may be wasted, but maybe he can pull himself together enough for the two of you to-

A loud snoring sound informs you that tonight won’t be going any further.

You can’t help but laugh at the sight of him. You know the stress response of drinking himself to unconsciousness is horrible, and you have no desire to encourage any more of it… but god, looking at him passed out against your chest, slightly drooling against the breast that hasn’t quite slipped out of his mouth…

He doesn’t react as you giggle and lightly scratch the back of his ear. He’s cute, relaxed like this.

“I’ll let you sleep,” you assure him as you stroke the back of his head. You lightly push on his forehead, and it takes a bit of pressure to release the seal he’s left around your breast. He’s left a pale red ring behind, punctuated with a dark bruise above your nipple and a few shallow fang marks.

You can’t wait to see his reaction to that after he’s sobered up. Maybe he’ll offer to do the other one, too…

He whines in his sleep as you move him slightly, allowing his head to drop into your lap. You wish you had a way of letting him know it’s only temporary; you just want to get out of your now-ruined nightgown. After you’ve stripped down to nothing but your panties and you’ve flung your damaged clothing in the vague direction of your trash can, you roll Husk off of you so you can slide down under the covers.

It takes you a few tries; in the time it took you to undress, he’s snaked his arms around your waist, and even in his drunken slumber he has no intention of letting go. You finally manage to dislodge him, and once you’re in a comfortable position, you guide his head back onto your chest.

His purring immediately returns when he realizes where he is. He tucks his wings against his back and nestles his head between your breasts, lets one of his paws find a breast and hold onto it like a comforting sleep toy, and within seconds, he’s dead to the world.

It’ll be a problem if you have to get up for the night, but for now, you’re comfortable like this, his weight securing you to the mattress, his fur tickling your skin in tandem with his breathing.

Maybe you’ll return the favor for him in the morning, if his hangover isn’t too bad. Or maybe some special attention would help distract him from the inevitable hangover? You’ll figure it out in the morning; until then, you’re in no rush to leave this position as you drift off to sleep.