#so i didn't have to touch anything

[bhaalsdeepbat]

i literally walked into this space knowing NO ONE, sat off to the side and told them, "I'm sorry, I'm like a cat. I have to just watch for a second, then I'll socialize more." and like. the entire group was just like YEAH MAKES SENSE. no one took it wrong. they just let me observe until i was ready to mesh in more. and now almost two years later I am now burrowed so deeply into this troupe that i wouldn't have the friends or opportunities i have without it.

[technically-human]

St. Hilarion's ghost story

[lightgamble]

DAREDEVIL: BORN AGAIN | 1.09

You know, back at his place, I heard your heartbeats.

[onethousxndvoices]

took a break from my main projects to do some visdev practice. have a line up for a layton fic that'll probably never see the light of day

[epickiya722]

It's still something to me that Sukuna knew Yuji was his nephew for like a month and didn't tell Yuji that.

Why he didn't, I don't know. But I guess it's because he didn't care to, at the end of the day. There would have been no point to it.

Even still, Sukuna wanted to so badly break Yuji's spirit and he didn't figure that may have done it, revealing they're technically family? Because had Yuji known, I'm sure it would have upset him.

Then again, maybe Sukuna figured "the brat wouldn't believe me anyways". In 248, he mentions no matter what he did, Yuji isn't breaking.

A part of me also feels like Sukuna just didn't want to be reminded that he still had family. The more you don't think and mention something and ignore it, the more nonexistent it becomes.

Maybe he acted dismissive while revealing that information to Uraume, who was more surprised and curious, to kind of cut off that connection. Extinguish that feeling of what it's like to have family that could care for you.

He was there to witness how Yuji's relationship with Choso changed and maybe it reminded him of what could have been had he and his twin survived in the womb. (I still think Sukuna just had it out for Choso and maybe part of the reason could be because Choso was so devoted to be being a big brother while Sukuna didn't get to experience having a sibling.)

We see how he acts just from Yuji showing any bit of sympathy and pity for him.

Maybe he is disgusted by the idea of human connections and emotions genuinely. That his own "me, myself and I" mentality is so strong that he convinced himself that even having family is absurd to him? And what if a part of him, deep, deep down just feels he doesn't deserve that love?

I'm just rambling and pondering right now.

[theblogwithoutfear]

On Daredevil: Born Again and Matt Murdock's Religious Convictions

One of the most glaring differences between Netflix's Daredevil and Disney's, thus far, has been in the (lack of) overt religiosity. While a lot of folks are upset about this, I actually think it's an important creative choice that tells us a lot about the state of Matt's mind and his soul.

Matt Murdock has always been a man of powerful convictions, and possesses a strong sense of both morality and ethics. He is also a deeply divided man, and has divided his life into two separate personas: The Lawyer, and The Devil. Very rarely is he ever Matt Murdock: The Man.

These two personas have mirroring missions, drives, and beliefs; both The Lawyer and the Devil work to defend the innocent, expose the truth, and punish the guilty. They work to carry out "the law."

However, they are carrying out two very different laws—and so they are, quite frequently, diametrically opposed.

The Lawyer side of Matt Murdock is deeply intertwined with the legal system. The Lawyer has a deep sense of ethics, integrity, and a faith in the power of the American justice system. Though he recognizes that it is not always just or equitable, The Lawyer continues to work within that system and believes that it can be redeemed from corruption. The Lawyer operates based on ethics.

The Devil side of Matt Murdock, ironically (or perhaps not ironic at all), is deeply intertwined with his Catholicism. Rather than the legal system, The Devil follows a higher law: the law of God, at least as far as Matt interprets it. The Devil cares about deeper issues of good vs. evil, and believes that he is carrying out the will of God as His soldier. The Devil understands that there is a deeper good in the world than the law; he operates based on morality.

In Daredevil: Born Again, Matt has given up Daredevil. He tells Fisk that he "lost the privilege;" he no longer believes he is worthy of acting as an arbiter of God's higher law. After losing Foggy and attempting to murder Dex, Matt cannot reconcile his conviction for carrying out God's law with the tangible results of his pursuit of it.

In episode 2 we see Matt standing outside a church while a choir sings "I am unworthy that you should enter under my roof." Matt feels too unworthy to enter, and also feels too unworthy for God to enter into his heart. He has "lost the privilege" of Daredevil; and thus, he has "lost the privilege" of practicing his faith like he used to.

Being Daredevil was an act of worship; without Daredevil, Matt can't (or won't) pursue the higher law.

However, during the Hector Ayala trial, it's clear that Matt is missing the sense of spiritual guidance, comfort, and wisdom that he found in the practice of his religious faith. One of the most beautiful, and telling, sequences of the show thus far is when he sits in the empty courtroom.

The shots are framed deliberately to remind us of a chapel. The aisle, the pew-style seats, the white light streaming in through the high windows, the judge's seat almost like an altar at the head of the room. Especially with the solemnity and solitude of the moment, we are meant to see the courtroom as Matt's substitute for a church.

This is taken even farther when Matt pulls out the piece of his horn, clasping it in his hands like he's praying the rosary.

Matt, although he claims to no longer need Daredevil, clearly misses the deep sense of spiritual connection he no longer has—both from his faith, and from Daredevil. Because the two are inextricably linked.

The Devil cannot worship at a church, nor can he practice a higher law.

Therefore, The Lawyer substitutes where he can. He worships at a courtroom, and practices the literal law.

To me, the lack of religious imagery in this show is not the writers shying away from a depiction of faith; rather, it seems to be a deliberate choice: they're showing us that Matt, although he still believes in God (see: the cross pendant), cannot worship Him fully until he picks up his mask again.

And obviously, he will.

[feroluce]

Randomly consumed today by the thought of henghill cuddles, but like from a specific point in their relationship, like after they've only recently started laying in the same bed together.

It's something that takes them a long time to work up to; they both have nightmares, and yeah, Dan Heng is a Vidyadhara and he can heal himself beyond anything Boothill could accidentally do to him, but still. Boothill is made of metal now. He's heavy. It wouldn't take much, just a single flailing limb to cause some damage. He still gets up after Dan Heng falls asleep, and sneaks down into the guest cabin in one of the other cars.

But he'll lay in bed with Dan Heng until then. At first Boothill would always try to situate a blanket between them, because well. Metal isn't exactly pleasant to cuddle. But more and more lately, he's noticed Dan Heng keeps worming his way around their soft barrier and just kind of...rubbing his hand along him? Open palm up the curve of his side, across the planes of his chest, into the star-shape at his solar plexus, down the plates of his abdomen, back to his side again. Fingertips tap soundlessly against metal, or press into dents and divots, or smooth over old scars in the steel.

"Ya don't hav'ta do that, ya know."

"Does it bother you?"

Dan Heng's hand has already stopped, settling somewhere on the futon, neutral ground. Boothill clarifies that no, it doesn't bother him. But he can't feel any of it. He only knows he's doing it because he can see the motion out of the corner of his eye. Dan Heng doesn't need to go through the extra effort to do things for him like he would someone with a normal human body.

And Dan Heng goes quiet, just long enough that Boothill gets curious and turns to look at him over his shoulder. He has the cute little furrow between his brows, like when he's thinking.

And then he opens that pretty mouth of his and says, "That's alright, I think I'm doing it for myself, anyway" and Boothill nearly wheezes because wow, Dan Heng is almost never quite that honest when it comes to himself fdklsajlkd

Boothill cackles in surprise and asks point blank what he means, because what could he be getting out of that? Given the implied permission, Dan Heng's hand starts it's usual route again. Side, chest, solar plexus, abdomen, side. Boothill can practically hear him chewing on his words.

"I like that you're warm," is what he finally says, and Boothill suddenly feels like a bullet has just grazed something vital. "All the processes you run increase your temperature," Dan Heng's hand fans out across a span of steel and he holds it there, like he's soaking up the heat. "And your metal is smooth, it feels pleasant to touch," his fingertips move in circles, slip into a divot perfectly sized, rub back and forth. Boothill silently wills one of his cooling fans threatening to open up to stay closed.

"I like how you feel under my hands. That's all." Headshot! No recovery possible.

"...Suit yerself, then," and Boothill quickly turns back over before Dan Heng can see it in his face, how close he just hit to his heart.

[natasha-in-space]

So I'm replaying Ray's After ending rn, and it got me thinking that what I adore so much about Rika as an antagonist is just how damn scary she can be. I always found those who cause harm with good intentions (at least in their point of view) much scarier than those who hurt you with pure intention on hurting you. I think the best example of it is this CG in particular:

Look at that. Such a loving, gentle expression on her face. Probably kissing his forehead. Because she loves him. Heck, without any context, this CG looks even sweet, if you think about it. And yet, all that is while Saeyoung is forcefully sedated on a powerful concoction of drugs even a trained agent like him can't do anything about (and Saeyoung WAS definitely trained to deal with this sort of thing, hence it's mentioned that this is a 'special' kind of drugs). He looks miserable. Bags under his eyes, his expression pained and troubled, even his hair is paler than usual. All that as a direct result of her actions. But she's utterly blind to it. What's scarier, is that she knowingly shuts off her understanding of what's really happening. She's not oblivious to it at all. She just chooses not to see it that way. Simply because she doesn't want to.

Rika is the type of antagonist that will cup your cheek into her warm hand with the most loving of smiles on her face, all while you are getting elixir poured down your throat. Even whispering to you that you're doing great, that the pain will soon pass, and that she can't wait to see you reach the happiness she knows you deserve. I won't be surprised if she even cried genuine tears of compassion during some ceremonies for her believers. All while being the sole reason behind their suffering.

And that's... God, that's terrifying to me. I love that about her.

Rika Kim, they could never make me hate you

[chelnciel]

Another thoughts about ch 23b and some hopes for the future

“What the hell is this?”

I wonder the same thing, dear.

“I’m all screwed up…!!”

I don't know how to understand Hirano's last thought, is he saying he's screwed because he is admitting that he has feelings for Kagi or because he's so deep in this thing that he can't see how to get out without hurting himself or Kagi in the process?

"But i've realized…Just thinking isn't enough to let me decide"

Hirano saying it is no longer enough just to think about it to make a decision... Is this a statement that the 10 sec of touches are no longer useful to him? Can we get our hopes up and think that he wants to try other things? Maybe not just an innocent touch of hands?

I want to believe that from now on, they will begin to explore more flirtations and intimacy between them (yes, even more), leaving aside a little bit the 10 seconds rule that fell short for both of them, and that we will see more BL development (as our dear author called it).

After reading and rereading the chapter, that phrase keeps haunting me (1), and it makes me hopeful that maybe Hirano's confusion/indecision comes from the fact that he reacts (unconsciously) more to emotion that manage to enter in that dense head of his than to physical contact and this deal they have has given him no major clues as to whether he can see our beloved basketball player as his boyfriend (I think he really only reacts to Kagi's reactions. Not to the touches themselves, not to what people around him say, only to what Kagi communicates to him, only to what Kagi says to him verbally or paraverbally).

Although when I was thinking about it I had forgotten a panel: when Hirano questions why he wanted to pet Kagi's hair and restrains himself.

So, he's not sooo foreign to touch, perhaps the problem is what kind of touch he knows and how he classifies it as a romantic touch. 

Initially he didn't want hugs, he considers them too intimate, but despite that he has never had a problem with all the times Kagi has pinning him (that is, Kagi to eat from his dango leans towards him, to make him feel if he has a fever he leans over him, and a few other times).

Or, maybe there's an issue with how Hirano interprets the touches, and how he assign the intention according to the context (or how he gets lost in the context). I mean, he allows him to put the earrings on him, or the lap pillow thing, or that they're always glued to each other, invading each other's personal space... isn't that something tremendously intimate per se?

It calls my attention by how in this chapter he doesn't show even the slightest bit of rejection to Kagi's clearly intimate closeness, where he only gets angry because Kagi doesn't look happy and not because he touching him, pushes him against the wall and tries to kiss him (impossible for him not to have thought about it with how close he was to his lips).

But, while so far he has been practically indifferent to the touches (not even a blush in front of Kagi after they almost kissed), the question now is how it will impact on him to have directly felt Kagi's racing heart, if in ch 20, only Kagi's look made him understand that all that passion was focused on him, what effect will it have to feel with his own hand the heat and beats of Kagi's heart focused 100% on him?

I keep my hopes high for the next chapters, since Hirano says that just thinking about it is not enough to make a decision, can we expect the deal to change and try to have a lovers experience closer to reality (maybe try to have a date? I need them to try dating), While it seems to me that the boundaries could be more relaxed, I still don't think he will let himself be kissed right now, but I do think the next moves will be initiated by Hirano, which I'm sure will continue to fall little by little until he himself, in a fit of impulsiveness, kisses Kagi.

At least in this chapter we got to see part of what he's thinking.

After his consideration of being someone else's next, I think this may arouse Hirano's curiosity about Kagi's love past.

I would love to see him ask him directly if he has had girlfriends/boyfriends and have Kagi confess to him that the lap pillow was a test to find out how he really felt about him since it was something he did with his ex, and then Hirano thinking what action would be useful for him to be able to define if that love is a romantic love ( and also what else Kagi will have done with his exes).

Another thing that fascinates me is how amusing Hirano's contradictions are: on the one hand he dismisses what Miyano says.

But on the other, he wants to keep trying. It's like he doesn't want to acknowledge that he loves him, but he's willing to try to love him (if that makes any sense), and also he doesn't want to monopolize Kagi's time, but at the same time he does want to. That poor head is a mess!

And there is an important difference in his reactions. While in ch 20 he tries to escape Kagi's hug (I love the whole scene), in ch 23 he doesn't make any gesture to push him away when he's obviously about to kiss him (and in manga's time it's been like two weeks apart). I don't think it really bothered him.

Also interesting is the late reaction that he always shows in front of Kagi, since only after shouting everything (thank goodness Hansawa wasn't in the next room), and only when he doesn't see him, is when he reflects and blushes just like in ch 17.

It's as if with Kagi present he has a extremely limited atention and can't see anything else or suppress anything. And in the end he sees him so brightly, it's as if he is dazzled by him and his actions every time he sees him.

About the next chapters I still don't have much idea of what will come (since how after chapter 20 Harusono surprised us with the whole date thing that we never saw coming, it's not very clear to me where the story will go), so maybe it's time to show us Ogasawara's date (which he agreed to go because he was in the middle of his gay panic) so that Hirano begins to understand how lovers behave and consciously or unconsciously replicate those behaviors.

It would be so funny if the date with Ogasawara ended up being a group date, with Eimi bringing some friends (of course, if Ogasawara can bring reinforcements, she has all the right to bring her friends). I see Sasaki listless in a corner, half asleep probably thinking about Miyano, Hirano comparing anyone to Kagi (how is he not comfortable without him, how Kagi would be happy eating a lot, taking the fries off his plate, and probably would like to go to the arcade...) and Hanzawa with his poker face while Ogasawara happily fixing things with his girlfriend.

I still believe that Sasaki is going to help Hirano discover his feelings (from what they mention in the ch 15 of ssmy), so hopefully he can help him get his feelings in order soon.

Although sometimes I get swallowed up by the negativity (and the over-analyses of KGHR's crumbs in ssmy that populate my daily thoughts) and I get the idea that they won't be together so quickly, even though in the last few chapters we've seen such a huge progress in such a short time of their timeline, but in ssmy there are panels that make me think that they won't be a couple so fast (I think there's still moderate angst left in this story, unfortunately for me).

On another topic, I still want to see:

🏀 Kagi's reaction to Hirano's black hair and that he's not wearing the earrings at the end of the school year.

🐉 Hirano with his black hair in Harusono's current art style (I live for this, I know I'll frame those panels).

🏐🏀 And if we'll ever get to see the Interclass Ball Games that never seem to come.

I don't want to calculate how many months or even years in real life we ​​have to wait until we see a kiss between them.

Btw, what happened to the hand cream? Was it in the bag? Maybe that date/non-date part is one of the extras in vol 5. anyway i'd rather they didn't show us this “date” (even though we were waiting for it for a year!!!), since it wasn't really a date.

Am I the only one who, based on the development of this chapter and the progress between them, thinks that this could be the chapter that closes volume 5? Crossing my fingers to have volume 5 during this year 🤞

[egophiliac]

LEON

LEON YOUR EYEBALLS

[hauntingblue]

Rewatching act 2.... yeah ISHA WATCH OUT FOR THE CYCLE ISHA!!!!! NOOOOO

[cursedwithwords]

I was looking at my statistics on Ao3 (never a good idea) and I'm just. So fucking baffled that the jegulus I haven't updated since 2019 is my most popular fic out of all my fics. Like I've written for a ton of fandoms, yet the jegulus with 8 chapters has the highest stats out of EVERYTHING.

I stopped writing it because I was really, really self conscious of my writing and my headcanons, I didn't think anyone would like it because it was such a left turn from the usual jegulus takes. But I also started posting it in 2019 when there really was not a ton of content for them yet. Part of me wants to return to it, because I hate that I have an unfinished fic on my ao3, and I loved the story a lot, but idk... I'm anxious about it... and it's been so long.

What should I do, besties? Genuine question with the hopes of actual advice BTW 🥺

[kaisollisto]

[storges-oranges]

Feeling insane about the hound origin again

Warnings: LI death mentioned, "Hound" title is treated rather literally as in; very doglike devotion, mentions of blood and injury. Please tell me if i should add anything else.

Title: by Leah Horlick

There is something to be said about Vere and the hound. Something about being collared or abandoned on a road after playing fetch. Something about looking at everyone distrustfully, despite knowing that absolute loyalty is the only thing you were made to feel. Something about remembering where that loyalty got you. Something about wanting help, needing help, but the only thing you can do now is bite.

The hand that seeks to harm, the hand that seeks to help, the hand that seeks to comfort, they all feel the same against your teeth don't they?

How does a fight dog love another fight dog anyway?

Ais loves you the way a nature reserve worker loves the beasts under his care. You bite him and look up, his hand still in your jaw, expecting anger. Expecting him to strike you for daring to betray him like this.

He smiles and pats you on the head. When you release his hand, he offers you tea. He keeps you around. He is so patient with you. Others would've left you. You can feel yourself getting attached. Again. You hate yourself for it but you stay.

Because you never leave first. That's not allowed for you.

You spend your days visiting him and joking around, wrestling his attention away from the soulless or Vere. When Vere pisses you off, you make a show of holding Ais's injured hand, with your teeth marks still visible on his skin. Ais chucles at your possessiveness.

The first kiss you shared started off as a bite, too.

Before he dies, you drop to your knees and hold his hand. He's looking up at you with an unbearable gentleness, and his body is getting colder.

Without thinking, you bite. 'How stupid' you think. 'He is bleeding to death already' But he understands you better than you do yourself, so he pats you on the head, and tells you it's going to be okay.

You clamp down on his hand harder, because the only things that stay are the ones caught between your teeth. Because that's the only thing you know how to do.

You never told him you loved him. You never showed him in the tender way you dreamed of. You wail into his open wound.

But it's ok. Ais understands. You know it by the way he tenderly holds the back of your head, by the way he smiles at you. By the ways he tells you to be good and take care of yourself after he's gone.

Kuras got used to seeing you sitting front of the back-door to his clinic. You're there in the acidic rain of Eridia, you're there in the suffocating sandstorms, you're there in freezing winter storms too.

You're there when he comes back from another harrowing experience that chipped away at his faith in humanity. He sees you right as his guilt and hopelessness threaten to swallow him whole.

You rise to your feet upon seeing him. You ask to open the door to escape the apocalyptic weather.

He is taken aback by... your continued presence? Your optimism? He doesn't know. But you are there, like you always are. You both get in, like you always do.

He offers you food, real food instead of the atrocities you got from...where did you get that exactly? Why can't you buy normal food? "The wet wick doesn't have anything edible" And that is better? You shrug. Doesn't Leander pay you for your services? "Its late this week".

You follow him around. As always. Until you both sit by the fire, plate in hand. Kuras watches the flames dance absent-mindedly until he feels you shift closer to him.

"Long day, huh?" You say, mouth full.

Your eyes are so pretty, illuminated by the fire as they are. He knows you went through alot , but they are still so pure, so full adoration. You look at him with so much adoration. He is an old being, he knows what adoration looks like in humans. He is unsure if he deserves it.

The day left him feeling like it was all for naught again. That really, he should just step back into the shroud and let history take its course. But he looks at you, at your worried face. He thinks of you sitting on the porch of his backdoor, waiting. Waiting in the rain , waiting in the sandstorm, waiting in the cold. For him to come back. To let you in. To come in with you.

He knows you would stay there for an unreasonable amount of time. Alone. Faithful.

He cannot bear the thought.

His hand finds your cheek before he knows what he is doing. Before he can take it back, you nuzzle against it, grinning.

Its like a weight is lifted off of his shoulders. If its for you, he can make it another day. If you're waiting, he will always come back.

[strohller27]

Yes Hello to all my fellow Miss Lemon fans out there:

If you love her as much as I do, then 6.2 Hickory Dickory Dock is the episode for you

Now let us all just take a moment out of our busy day to bask in her glory:

That coat with those hats?? ICONIC she has such a flawless style

and this little scene where she's like 'this is just a quirk of Mr. Poirot's, don't worry about it' fellas help she's so cute

also HELP lads she took Poirot's comment about Inspector Japp's 'healthy appetite' way too literally!! LEMON SOLE! she's so funny aagh

Also she looks really damn good in burgundy wow

Also you know I hate the trope where guys tell ladies to take their glasses off and let their hair flow in the wind because they'd somehow be 'sexier' or whatever. That is just simply not true. Case in point: Look at how cute Miss Lemon is in her glasses!!

Just. Everyone just. Look at my favourite girl. Look at her!!! Her filing system is perfect! Her filing system could kick your ass!!!

[redrosydiaz]

really fucking sick and tired of people who really fucking love the eddie book jumping on people who don't like or are even remotely critical of it's posts and like crusading their opinions around from the top of their high horses and shoving it down our throats.

if you like the book, great! that's awesome! love that for you! i am genuinely glad that you were able to find good in it and enjoy it!!

but not everyone did, and not everyone is going to agree with you. so, instead of going on some grand crusade where you find every single post that includes anything even remotely negative or negative adjacent or even neutrally critical and spending ALL this time and effort trying to provide unwanted rebuttals to every single thing, maybe you should just stay in your lane and find people who DO like the book and chat about it with them.

because i can PROMISE YOU, none of us appreciate it when you come onto our posts and start accusing us of "hating on" the author or "being rude" about her and her work and RIDICULOUS shit like that.

being critical of something and pointing out it's flaws is NOT inherently hating on it. i, frankly, do not know where people got that notion, but it's not fucking true so can we fucking quit assuming it is? and, critiquing something is also NOT the same as saying this is shit and it sucks and the author is a piece of garbage. again, where the fuck that came from is beyond me. you can be critical of something and still enjoy it. as soooo many of you love to point out, it's not perfect, why should it be perfect? so D U H. of course that means criticism can and should arise???

also. hot take (by which i mean ice fucking cold because it's NOT a fucking hot take), but going around toting FALSE facts as part of your "defense" does not make you or your argument look good. you, like the author, should maybe do a basic fact check first. 🙃

tldr, if you like the book, that's genuinely great, but stay in your fucking lane and stop seeking out posts from people who didn't like it to start shit in the notes.