#pitayafire

[burningcheese-merchant]

Need to decompress after writing several dark and heavy BurningCheese works one after the other, so I finished a wholesome PitayaFire fic I had sitting in my drafts for like 2 weeks as a palette cleanser

Go read it if you want, I'm going to go finish the BurningCheese kids' character sheets in the meantime (there are two of them, a son and a daughter. There, I'll go ahead and spoil that for you because why not, you'll be meeting them soon anyway)

[kabii-kins]

Here take this set of ship edits that I forgot to post here a while ago.

Edit: I switched it out for the nontransparent version because tumblr's beIN A liTTLE BITCH

[burningcheese-merchant]

oh great burningcheese-merchant, I know you're on a craze with this couple, who are awesome btw, but I come here today with a humble request as a long time reader that maybe you could consider revisiting your "cookie run ship backstories" on AO3. There are some couples on that fic I was eagerly awaiting to read about 👀 ofc no pressure, if you don't wanna come back to it, that's totally cool, I'll read whatever you choose to write because you are that fantastic at it ☝

You read that? And you actually like it? And you actually like it enough to come ask me to continue it???

I didn't think anyone cared about that one (or any of the not BurningCheese ones tbh, those have stolen my entire show 😂)! I did it for funsies and was surprised it even got to 400 hits! I'm really touched you want more, I'm going to add another ship chapter as soon as possible (later today probably, since they're all done and old as hell) just for you! (I'm between AbyssEel or BlackCaviar. I like how I wrote those ones in particular. I hope those are some of the ones you wanted to hear about haha)

Now... Look at the camera and tell everyone that the PitayaFire chapter is your favorite :) Don't mind the gun pointed at you, please ignore the cool metal of the shotgun barrel digging between your shoulder blades, forget that it's fully loaded, just tell the world that that was the best one and you ship PitayaFire to death and think everyone one else should, too :))) (kidding, obviously. You enjoy whatever you ship you want. I'm just so alone on PitayaFire Island waaaaahhhhhhhh)

I really am grateful for all the people that enjoy my writing. It means the world to me that I'm actually good enough at something that people enjoy what I do with it. I hope I'm able to keep entertaining you all with my nonsense stories, BurningCheese-related and otherwise ❤️

[burningcheese-merchant]

Lastly…

<_<

>_>

Got any specific Firetaya HCs? How do you think their first meeting went?

"Got any specific Firetaya HCs"

OH BOY DO I-

Gonna do us all a favor and only address the "first meeting" though. I have an honest-to-God PitayaFire relationship bible that I put together over the course of a few years and it's embarrassing as hell and nobody needs to hear about it all right away, we'll be here for two weeks otherwise

It is canon that they met when Fire Spirit was mortal and dying. How he got to where he was, what circumstances led to that moment, who he used to be before that day, we do not know currently and likely never will (already made up a backstory for that though, so it's ok). Pitaya Dragon appeared to him out of morbid curiosity. Fire Spirit begged for his life, offering him whatever he wanted in exchange. Pitaya is intrigued and impressed with his persistence. The deal is struck. Fire Spirit ascends to godhood and escapes death... but for what price, exactly?

With this in mind, let's go down the route I've paved:

Pitaya Dragon is deeply, genuinely impressed with this little mortal. Trapped in an eternal flame, no way out, no salvation, no one to care if he lives or dies... yet he keeps fighting. He's still here, trying to delay the inevitable. He has nothing. No power. No weapons. He's just a guy. All he's got is his willpower, his fighting spirit, and it's actually keeping him alive- long enough for help to actually stumble across him. That takes guts. Guts Pitaya has never seen before, especially not in any mortals.

What takes even more guts is being forward and offering Pitaya something in exchange for his help. No one has ever done this before (this is canon). It is Pitaya who grants people wishes, not the other way around. This mortal who's burning away, crumbling to dust as they speak, musters the courage to not only ask for his help, but to reverse their roles and offer to grant Pitaya a wish if he does? That's bold. That's daring. Of course Pitaya will say yes, why wouldn't he? It's an offer neither of them can really refuse.

And Pitaya eggs him on, because of course he does. He's gotta see what else this mortal can do. "Take a sip of this lava juice and I'll grant you the red bead." He fucking does it, he just drinks straight lava without even flinching. HELL YEAH. "Drink the whole cup and I'll grant you a wish!" HE DOES IT. NO FUCKING WAY. THIS IS THE BEST. Pitaya is CRAZY impressed. OF COURSE he'll save this guy, he's got to. He needs to see what he'll choose to do with the rest of his life afterwards. If he's this strong-willed now, when he's about to die, what will he be capable of when he's at his peak?

Meanwhile, Fire Spirit... is literally dying. At least the agony stopped when the fire burned his nerves away. But... he's dying. He's clinging to a thread that's about to snap. He senses a presence, an aura of overwhelming power, descend upon him, and a deep, booming, reptilian voice address him. He realizes who it is, and begs for help. For divine intervention. And he knows what this person is like already. He knows the legends. He recalls how his tribe and others speak of them, worship them. The Red Dragon is not a "something for nothing" type. He's got to give him something back... but what's the equivalent exchange here? What does he have to offer?

He says he'll give the dragon whatever he wants. But really, underneath that, the truth is... he's offering the dragon himself. All Fire Spirit has to give is Fire Spirit. That's it, really. No power, no prestige, no weapons, no treasure... just him. His will. His sincerity. His soul. But will the dragon take them? Would the dragon accept something like that?

He's not afraid when he meets the dragon. He's not afraid when he drinks the lava juice. Not even when it scorches his throat and boils him alive from the inside out. He's not afraid when he takes that bead, and he's overwhelmed with agony all over again as fire engulfs him a second time - but he's not falling apart anymore, he's being fixed; his ashes are being stitched back together into something new. Something better. He's not afraid, he can't be. Now's not the time for that. Now's the time to seize his moment. To save himself. To be bold, daring, persistent.

And the Red Dragon loves persistence.

And then, when FS is all better, PD shows him his humanoid/cookie form and FS thinks "OH NO HE'S HOT-"

I'll just leave it here lol. I think I've gone on long enough. I could rant about PitayaFire forever, honestly. They're my ride-or-die and you're all sleeping hard on them. Idk why. "Hurr durr alcoholic shield lady" NO. "Hurr durr green arrow man" NO. "Man who is rescued from certain death by a capricious deity for dubious reasons, who must now grapple with his newfound power and responsibility and identity, while also accidentally falling in love with the deity who saved him and struggling to come to terms with it and what it says about him as a person, fearing that it's some form of Stockholm Syndrome, that Pitaya doesn't care about him at all, that Pitaya just thinks he's a plaything they own, knowing that he is stuck with Pitaya for eternity regardless of it all and there is no going back on their deal outside of death/suicide, damn it Pitaya is just going to make fun of him if the truth ever comes out- BUT IT TURNS OUT HE DOESN'T, PITAYA LIKES HIM TOO, NOW THEY HAVE THIS PASSIONATE BUT COMPLICATED RELATIONSHIP THEY HAVE TO NAVIGATE, THEY'RE BOTH STUBBORN AND HATE TO BE VULNERABLE AND THEY STRUGGLE TO COMMUNICATE AND THEY ARGUE A LOT BUT THEY REALLY DO LOVE EACH OTHER AND THEY'RE GONNA MAKE IT WORK SOMEHOW, THEY HAVE TO, THEY'RE STUCK WITH EACH OTHER FOR ETERNITY AND THEY DON'T WANT ANYONE ELSE" Y E S. D E F I N I T E L Y. A B S O L U T E L Y.

[burningcheese-merchant]

It has come to my attention that there is no Pitaya Dragon x Fire Spirit content on here

Fuck all of you for that, you shall now face divine retribution

[burningcheese-merchant]

I'm the happiest person on Earth right now lol

(Just gonna go ahead and embarrass myself by revealing a panel from the PitayaFire wedding comic I made ages ago because why not. I'm already a clown, might as well)

[burningcheese-merchant]

Pitaya Dragon: Wait, are you flirting with me?!

Fire Spirit: Have been for the past 3000 years but thanks for noticing

[burningcheese-merchant]

MERCHANT MAKE PART 2 OF "Mine Forever More" - AND MY LIFE IS YOURS!!!

You guys really enjoyed that one huh lol. Already had a gaggle of people ask me for a part 2. I guess I'm not the only one who has fun with Yandere Spice we are all in dire need of Jesus and the Church

Let me play through episode 6 whenever that comes out. I don't really know how to proceed with a part 2, nor was I expecting people to ask me for one, and I'm hoping the next half of the story gives me an idea. In the meantime, I can direct you to my fics on AO3, Spice is pretty yandere in most of those lol. I'll also be returning to the wholesome slow-burn formula for the next short I'm cooking. I appreciate your patience

A million thanks again to you and everyone else who reads and enjoys my stories, your support and encouragement quell my extreme irl pessimism

(Oh, also. If you all would like to tell me how you'd prefer part 2 goes, feel free to do so. That might help me plan the story a little more. Do you want Golden Cheese to kick Burning Spice's ass, or do you want Burning Spice to go ahead and manhandle her some more? I get the impression that people like both lol. Send me asks or reply to this post or whatever works for you guys better and let me know.

(Burning Spice is encouraging you all to pick option 2. He told me there's a fatal axe wound in all of your futures if you don't))

[burningcheese-merchant]

BurningCheese/GoldenSpice Playlist

Ok, time to stop being a bitch and post the ship playlist I keep harping on about already.

Gonna mark each song with an emoji to signify if it's meant to either be Burning Spice's POV (🔺) or Golden Cheese's (🧀). It's also going to be band/singer name first, song name second, for ease of understanding

Thank you to everyone who's reached out to me, both on here and on AO3, with song suggestions! A good chunk of these came from me myself, but a lot of people introduced me to plenty more songs that I loved and agreed suited these two perfectly. It's been fun putting a playlist together with this help, it feels like a fun group project now lol. (Hell, you guys are actually helping me think of new writing material. Music is a huge source of inspiration and creativity for me, as I'm sure you've noticed. In a way, you're all indirectly making fic requests lol)

You're all still more than welcome to keep shooting me song ideas to add, the playlist is ever-expanding! I'll just come back to this post and edit any new additions in. (This playlist is 3x longer than my PitayaFire one. I need you all to understand how big of a deal that is for me personally. I never thought I'd be this down bad for a ship besides that one. It's fucking surreal)

Some of it is meant to sound one-sided, others like it's a mutual love/relationship. I'll let you guess which is which lol. Now rock out to Evil Spice Man x Pretty Cheese Lady with me 🤘🤘🤘

Mindless Self Indulgence - Shut Me Up🔺

Fall Out Boy - I Don't Care🔺(with the Wild Spice crew as the backup singers!!!)

Mariah Carey - Obsessed 🧀

Three Days Grace - I Hate Everything About You🔺🧀

Lady Gaga - Bad Romance🔺🧀

Dead or Alive - You Spin Me Round (Like a Record)🔺

Mindless Self Indulgence - What Do They Know?🔺

Britney Spears - Toxic 🧀

Fish in a Birdcage - Rule #34🔺(this is also a great PureShadow song ngl. It's how it was first introduced to me, even lol)

Shayfer James - Filthy Habit🔺

King Gnu - SPECIALZ🔺🧀 (look up the English version of the lyrics. Very BurningCheese-core imo)

Mindless Self Indulgence - This Hurts🔺

Jack Black - Peaches🔺(shout out to the anon in my inbox who suggested this. Joke's on them, I had this on the playlist right from the start lolololololol)

Arctic Monkeys - R U Mine?🔺

Lady Gaga - Poker Face 🧀

Olly Murs (feat. Flo Rida) - Troublemaker 🧀

Rihanna - Where Have You Been🔺(fun fact: I had this playing on a loop as I wrote "Our Little Dance" to get into the Yandere Spice mindset lol)

Lady Gaga - Judas 🧀

Miike Snow - Genghis Khan🔺

The Orion Experience - Obsessed With You🔺(this song is just really funny. You can probably apply it to all Beast x Ancient ships tbh)

Nine Inch Nails - Closer🔺

Mindless Self Indulgence - 5TR82HE11🔺

Air Traffic Controller - This Is Love🔺

Bad Omens - THE DEATH OF PEACE OF MIND🔺🧀

Isabel LaRosa - favorite 🧀

Bloodhound Gang - The Bad Touch🔺(listen I imagined Spice singing this to Golden and just started howling with laughter, it's fucking hysterical ok)

ENHYPEN - Bite Me🔺

Scissor Sisters - I Can't Decide🔺(GC would sing a few parts tho)

5 Seconds of Summer - Teeth🔺🧀 (mostly Spice though)

Buerak - Культ Тела 🔺(look up English lyrics, very Yandere Spice coded. Thank you to the anon who suggested it)

Tom Lehrer - The Masochism Tango🔺

Lady Gaga - Disease 🧀

G-Eazy (with Halsey) - Him & I🔺🧀

Britney Spears - ...Baby One More Time🔺(imagine Spice singing this while stuck in prison. Please. He's singing and the other Beasts want to off themselves because it's so annoying and he won't stop. Please it is so funny. I have so much fun imagining this freak acting stupid-)

[burningcheese-merchant]

I have. A few things to say! First of all, thank you for writing for here (and there, but I do not have an AO3)! I’m very in much love with someone going crazy for another and *mwah* do you do it right and justice! That said, prioritize yourself! Drink water! Eat! Do not burn out, and do not feel pressured to do stuff! I hope that your spark burns for long after this fandom!

Thank you so, so much for your kind words! I know you sent multiple asks, so I'm going to try to respond to the first two in one post, if that's ok! (I'll answer the PitayaFire one separately)

Don't you know that the truest, most profound kind of love is born not beneath the soft, pale light of the full moon, not in the sound of a pair's steps as they dance the night away, not within the warmth and security of a tender embrace, but within the walls of the solitary confinement cell in the "dangerous and violent" housing section of a psych ward? LOL jk. It's really fun writing a lovesick/obsessed person for some reason. I don't have this dynamic for any of my other ships, this is the first time I've opted to explore a darker, more uncomfortable and unstable route/interpretation of a "relationship" and it's honestly been a blast lol. (I DO also ship mutual BurningCheese, but under specific conditions, AKA Burning Spice has a redemption arc and GC falls for him on her own. I just can't justify them being together if he's still evil. So long as he is, the love is one-sided)

I really am grateful for your compliments and encouragement. I've got a super big and important BurningCheese fic in the oven rn, but I do need to actually focus on real life for a bit, so it'll be some time. I'll be posting drabbles on here and a fic or two on AO3 where BS is NOT dangerously insane, just a regular asshole who's down bad lol

You can rest assured that my crazy diamond will continue shining on long after I get tired of these games about talking cookies. I always loved writing, it's my favorite hobby and it's my only way of expressing my creativity since I can't draw to save my life. I actually have a 100% original work I've been tinkering with for a loooong time, but I always wanted that story to be told in comic form, and to do that... I have to learn to draw lol. (And that's... a really big mountain to climb. I want to climb it more than anything, but I don't know if I can. Feels like I keep slipping and falling on my ass every time I try to take and retake the first step on the first rock, you know? Idk how anyone does it, honestly...) In any case, I'm truly grateful for you and everyone else who bothers to look at my work and actually thinks it's good for some reason

Did you see that gacha animation though 👀 The way BS is looking at her 👀 y'all can't tell me he ain't thirsty. Look at that twinkle in his eye. Look at that smile. He wants to tear up more than just those wings, I'm telling you 👀 Shadow Milk is a silly billy, he thinks puppet shows and gaslighting are how you flirt with people. Mystic Flour is probably just like "what. What is this. Who is this man. Why is he handsome. Why do I feel this way. Emotions are futile. Love is ephemeral. I will not stray from the path. I will trap him in my mind prison and torture him. That will fix it. He will surrender to apathy. He will return my soul jam. He will see how smart and correct I am. Cloud Haetae will sing my praises to him until he believes them. Yes. That is what will happen. Victory is mine. I am Very Normal about this." Burning Spice? Down horrendous. Down crazy. When GC is there, it's like no one else is in the room. Won't stop smiling. Only mentions the Soul Jam once, focuses on her specifically the whole rest of the time. First real thing he says to her is how much she impresses him. Throws a tantrum after their fight essentially because she didn't step on him hard enough. Down bad. Down bad. Down bad. Ain't no way he isn't. You can't change my mind

Sorry for rambling. TL;DR: Yo Socrates, it's a fucking cookie (also thank you for your support)

[burningcheese-merchant]

I was already down bad for Goldenspice thanks to you, and low-key struggling help to make that work in the version of canon in my head because I also ship GoldenCacao.

BUT NOW just reading your last post is convincing me more and more to just fuck everything and make a poly between Mystic Flour x Dark Cacao x Golden Cheese x Burning Spice. Because none can stop me... I guess :v

But anyways, I also just wanted to say that I love the way you write. Not only the fact that you write GoldenSpice, I just love the way you use words is just so so so so good and low-key gives an image of the story to the point I can imagine the scene in my head.

Keep the good work, take rests too. You are slaying with everything you write :D

Yes, my plan is working. More and more people have been reaching out to me and telling me I converted them to BurningCheese/GoldenSpice. I will use you all as my personal army. We will break into Fort Knox and steal all the gold. I will trade the gold for real money. I will use the money to buy out Devsisters, thus making me the owner of the Cookie Run games. I will make BurningCheese and PitayaFire canon, exactly per my personal artistic vision. I will anger a huge portion of the fanbase. There will be an angry mob at my doorstep. But they will be too late, as I would have already ascended to godhood and become impervious to all attacks long before they reach me. This is all in accordance with the prophecy. Attempting to delay or prevent your ultimate fate will only seal it further. Embrace death and suffering. Embrace destruction. The Tide of Change upon which I ride shall swallow you all whole.

Seriously though, thank you for your compliment! The way I see it is like this: an important aspect of storytelling is "show, don't tell" (and knowing how to balance both, of course), but that can be a lot harder to accomplish when you're writing without any accompanying pictures, because that is literally just "telling". I really do try to paint a picture with my words, so to speak. Telegraph movements, set up areas, convey emotion the best I can. I can't draw to save my life, unfortunately, so I have to express myself through pen and keyboard instead. I'm no Shakespeare but I do my best. And it really does mean a lot to me that people enjoy my work.

Expect more BurningCheese in the future, both here and on AO3! (And also other ships maybe, I actually do like several other ships quite a lot and would like to write about them as well)

[kabii-kins]

Some ship edits I've had saved up for a while + a new tree ship set of edits I just did.