#so don't be surprised if this THING is the last thing I post for a while sorry

[zoyaspoetry]

I know that you guys could be surprised cuz last few posts were about Halsey. Ah, i knew that this moment will come here one day and basically i should explain why i like her so fking much.

I'm gonna do this in 2 versions - polish and english cuz i know that i have both types of readers here. ;-)

There we go - english at first (polish later, after my shift at work).

I was 19 when I discovered Halsey here on Tumblr. I was 19 and depressed, so Tumblr was some kind of med for me. First her song - Young God, which i reconized cuz of this post. I was looking for a new music anyway, so maybe that was a sign, huh? It was something new, something magic... And i was like "wtf, it can't be true, why is she so fking great?" - i swear, i was shocked for next few days. Finally i found someone who understands me in 100%. This is how i discovered BADLANDS - her 1st album. Now i just feel tears in my eyes, cuz i didn't expect then that her music is gonna save my life... like 665734 times. She was first person, who understands what i had in my head and what i wanted to say. Do you know how is it when you don't understand yourself, when people around you don't understand you and then you discovered artist, who FINALLY KNOWS WHAT DID YOU MEAN? I was devastated. Her music shocked me at first and broke me into small, tiny pieces. So many memories i have in my head right now. I posted a video from her yesterday's concert where she's singing "Drive" and i just felt like Im 21 again and all what i can see is colorful sky, 5 a.m, and my ex-boyfriend sitting with me in his car and we are sooo tired, happy, even when Im manic again and Im gonna break him. This song is about him, i swear. It's about every fking moment, when we were drinking raspberry tea, smoking cigarettes at 3 a.m, talking and laughing. I think BADLANDS changed something in me. This is one of my favorite albums EVER. All of this is about my roots. About being a Tumblr princess, colorful hair, glitter, tiny dresses, heavy shoes (I should focus on my job right now, but all what i can do is being crushed cuz i feel like 19 again).

Halsey is a great lyrics creator. Her words every fking time resonate with me (maybe cuz she's bipolar as well, which i realized few years later). Sometimes she's just singing something what i can't even describe. She's brave and in simply way saying everything what i wanted to say, but sometimes i just couldn't. Today, almost 10 years later, I can't imagine what could happen with me without her music. I'm so grateful that i could discover her music. This is one of many good things Tumblr gave me.

I believe that one day I'll meet her at her concert and I'll be able to say how grateful I'm. She was my support in almost every moment of my adult life. When i was broken, depressed, crazy, insane. When love sucked for me, when i felt misunderstood, when i needed power and being sure that i'm doing right things. Even when i didn't understand myself. SHE LITERALLY SAVED MY LIFE. When i was sure I'm gonna die soon, i just listened her music and i was better.

This is one of the most personal thing in my life, more personal than things i did when i was manic. I wish that everyone can discover her music and her as a person. Everyone should be grateful cuz without her... I would be fking dead long time ago.

(polish version later, so stay tuned and sorry for my being emotional lol)

Thank you @tiredandlonelymuse for everything. You're my queen since you started your music adventure and it's not gonna change, like never. You have saved many, many lives. Mine as well.

hold me down x roman holiday x young god

halsey + swimming pools

do not remove caption

[ashnnix]

"This horny Incubus won't leave me alone"

Incubus Gojo x Sub Male reader.

Warnings: Bottom reader, amab, dubcon, overstimulation, reader is a streamer, Gojo is also like a sub. Based on manga named 'Game Shitai Dake na no ni Incubus ni Suwaremakuru'!

You finally hit "End Stream" and slump back in your chair like a ragdoll. Chat had been dead tonight, your kill/death ratio was trash, and you accidentally moaned over a jump scare again. Peak embarrassment.

With a groan, you rub your face and mutter, “Kill me now.”

But of course, death is too kind and not nearly as annoying as him.

Just as you start reaching for the last cold sip of your energy drink, you feel it. A slow, warm pressure against your lap like fingers, or maybe something worse, something playful and so ero.

You sigh, not even flinching this time. “Gojo.”

A low chuckle curls around your ear, smug and too pleased with himself. “Aw, you always ruin the surprise, streamer-kun. I was trying to be subtle this time.”

“You literally touched my dick.”

“I said subtle, not invisible,” he hums, his voice a purr. A moment later, you feel his weight settle on the armrest, his face way too close, silver hair brushing your cheek. “You know the rules. You stream, I visit. It's a whole... energy exchange thing. You’re glowing with that sweet loser energy I need to survive.”

You shoot him a tired glare. “You’re such a freak.”

Gojo grins, fangs peeking out just a little. “And yet, you keep letting me feed.”

You don't answer. Mostly because you don't have one. He always shows up after your streams like clockwork, in heat and lewd touches and sinful smiles. He says he feeds on your life force, but you’re not stupid. That’s not all he’s after.

Hes after your tight asshole, not just your cum.

"You were cute tonight," he whispers, tapping his finger against your chin. "Especially when you screamed like a little bitch during that horror game. I felt that jolt of panic straight through the ether– “

“You’re disgusting.”

“I’m an incubus, babe. It’s in the job description.” He shifts in your lap, way too casual for someone basically straddling you. “You know you could make this easier by just letting go. Give me a little more cum.”

Your breath hitches as his hand trails down your chest, slow and lazy. You curse yourself for reacting.

“See? You like when I tease you,” he murmurs, licking his lips. “Just say the word, and I’ll make this whole ‘streamer burnout’ thing go away. Nice and easy.”

You look away, biting your cheek. He always does this. Always pushes until you're at the edge.

“…I hate you,” you mumble.

Gojo grins, fangs glinting as he leans closer, lips brushing your ear.

“No you don’t.”

And damn it, maybe you don’t.

You’re not sure when exactly it went from “mildly annoying post-stream visit” to “I’m going to lose my mind if he keeps touching me like that,” but Gojo has a talent for crossing lines with zero shame.

"God, you're such a brat," you snap, grabbing his wrist after he let his hand wander a little too far over your thigh.

He just grins, head tilting, white hair falling over his forehead like he styled it on purpose even though you know he didn’t. “Mmm… getting angry now, are we?” he hums, tone syrupy and smug. “So hot when you act tough. Wanna growl at me next?”

You don’t even think you just grab the front of his leather straps, shove him back, and push him toward your bed like you’ve completely lost the plot.

“Shut up you fucking gonner” you bark, pissed, flustered, way too turned on. Why wouldn't you a sexy big chested man on your bed legs open wide ready to be fucked.

Gojo stumbles back with a laugh and lands flat on your bed, legs open, hands propped behind his head like he’s been waiting for this exact moment. And judging by the way he bites his lip hard enough that his fang catches it just a little he has.

“Oh?” he says, voice low, that smile spreading slow and deliberate. “So this is how you wanna play it?”

You glare, chest rising and falling too fast, hands clenched at your sides. You’re not even sure what just happened. You’re mad. You’re humiliated. You’re–

“Perfect,” he murmurs under his breath, almost like it’s to himself. “Pissed off, flustered, desperate… You’re gonna last maybe three rounds before you start begging.”

Your brain short-circuits.

“What?”

“You don’t get it yet, do you?” he interrupts, sitting up a little, licking his bottom lip slowly. “The more riled up you get, the better you taste. Emotion, energy, frustration…” He reaches forward, fingers ghosting over your waistband. “You think I came here just to tease? Nah, baby I came to drain everything out of you. Might as well have fun doing it.”

And even though your pride’s screaming, your body betrays you– shivering at the sound of his voice, the heat of his touch, the glint in his incubus eyes that tells you you’re not sleeping tonight.

Not unless it’s with him. And probably not even then.

You might’ve started this pissed off, but now?

You're just screwed. In every possible way.

Gojo's incubus tail flicked, and as usual, he slid down your waistband. Your cock stood hard in front of him.

Gojo smirked, eyes filled with lust and longing. ‘Shit, I missed him so much.’

You flinched when you felt his tongue graze over your tip.

Drooling, Gojo kept his tongue out as he slurred through his grin, “You worked so hard, darling.”

He kissed your tip with a wink. “I'll make sure to satisfy you♡.”

Of course, you were turned on but you hadn’t even taken a bath yet. You raised a hand to stop him. “Hey, can you wait for like a couple minute?”

Gojo stroked your head, making you shiver. “Ah! Hmp–” You quickly muffled the sound with your hand.

Gojo smirked, continuing his slow pace, eyes locked onto your cockhead. “If I wait that long, I might wither and die.”

You clenched your fists, trying to keep steady under his warm touches.

Gojo’s fingers played skillfully along your shaft, as usual. “And like always, I’ll only take one load.”

You glared down at him. “You’re the one who’s never satisfied with just one.”

Gojo licked the base of your cock, his sticky drool trailing along your skin. You winced in pleasure. “Guh!–”

Your reaction made his dick twitch. “Huh? I meant it for real this time,” he muttered.

Gojo opened his mouth wide, tongue out like a porn star. “But don’t worry, I’ll make you feel better.”

His mouth swallowed you whole.

Your hips instinctively pushed forward as pleasure surged through your entire length. “Ah! Mhm! Gojo–hmm~” you gasped, feeling his warm mouth wrap around you. His teeth grazed slightly, but it didn’t hurt.

Gojo’s face flushed red as he took you in, the only thought in his mind 'I'll make him cum so hard he can’t say no to my dick.’

He bobbed his head, your cock hitting the back of his throat. His eyes rolled back. ‘Ooh~ he tastes so good!’

You muffled your whines as heat spread through your body. “Ugh–hng!”

You felt yourself getting closer who could blame you? A professional dick-sucker was draining your soul. “I’m cumming!”

Gojo pressed his face against your pubes just as your release hit–warm, sticky, and slightly salty–as it spilled down his throat, filling him with renewed energy.

“Ahhh…” You thrust your hips a couple of times, feeling Gojo savor your taste.

Gojo felt his black leather panties tighten, his fat dick growing harder and harder.

He pulled off with a wet pop, drool still connecting his lips to your tip.

You watched as he opened his mouth, just like the yaoi scenes you’d read his tongue proudly holding your load.

Gojo touched the cum with a heated breath, his body overheating with the desperate need to be inside you. “Your cum’s thick as always, so gross.”

You shivered at the sight, but blinked in confusion at his words. “So is that a good thing or not?”

Gojo looked up at you. “Yes and no.”

You sighed only for him to suddenly pull you onto the bed. You grunted as your body hit the mattress, opening your mouth to complain but the words died when you saw him.

His eyes were blown wide, pupils shaped like hearts. His body was sweaty, mouth dripping with saliva and your cum. He was panting heavily, and best of all…

His thick, fat cock loomed over your face casting shadows, leaking pre like it was already lubed up.

Gojo raised your legs, his hand twitching with excitement. “Make me feel good now.”

With one sharp thrust, his hips pushed forward, burying all of his cock inside you. He whined, his tail flicking wildly behind him. “Ohh, Y/N! So tight, so good! Ngh!”

Your eyes rolled back, your back arching from the overwhelming pleasure.

An incubus cock could turn anyone dumb from just the pre alone hitting the victims sweet spot.

“Ugh–ngh! Go-Gojo! Gi-give me a warning next ha… time!” you slurred, mouth already drooling.

But Gojo wasn’t listening because he was just as dumb with lust. “Ah~♡ My darling’s tight loser hole... I missed this,” he rambled, his hips already moving at a fast pace.

Fwap fwap

“Shi– too fast, G-Gojo! Nghhh~ haa! Huagh!!!” you cried, your hands gripping the sheets tightly, head tilting back as his dick pounded your prostate over and over.

Gojo felt his cock twitch at your reaction. He moaned like a slut, just as loud. “Oh! Ah! Ahn! Y-Y/N! You're so tight–so fucking tight!”

You felt your body shudder, your vision starting to blur. “FUCK! A-Ahm–I'm gonna cum!!”

Gojo didn’t hear you–but just as he hit your prostate again, your vision went white.

Feeling you tighten around him, Gojo’s mouth dropped open, watching you cum like a virgin all over again. “Finally! Darling’s cumming! Hehe ahh~”

Gojo was surprised when you suddenly flipped him onto his back. His eyes widened as he watched you strip off your top, his cock still barely inside you. The sight only turned him on more.

You glared down at him, still breathless and flushed. “You haven’t cum yet, and I’m still pent up from the tournament.”

Without warning, you slammed your hips down.

Plop, plop!

This time, it was Gojo’s back that arched. “Ohh! Love your hole! Ngh–love it so much!”

You smirked, but your confidence flickered when you felt his cock reach even deeper. “Ohh! Y-You love it? Ngh–mhm! Love my loser hole?”

Gojo nodded frantically, hands gripping your hips with desperation. “Y-Yeah! Love your hole!”

The way you tightened around his thick length had him leaking pre-cum again and again, his brain short-circuiting with pleasure. “Da-hm… Awm… too–ngh… cu– ngh!” He couldn’t even form a straight sentence anymore.

Plop plop schlorp!

You didn’t understand or didn’t care as you kept slamming your hips down over and over. “Haa–ngh! Cre-creampie this loser’s ass!”

And Gojo did.

He arched his back, the tip of his cock pressing deep, kissing the very end of your hole. “Huaghhh!!” His eyes rolled back, pupils replaced with hearts as he threw his head back.

Your body trembled, your own orgasm crashing into you. “Ooh~ Shoo full! Shoo good!” you slurred, your dick twitching as his thick cum filled you to the brim.

“Haa… haa…”

Both of you took a moment to catch your breath.

‘Shit, he fucked me and I fucked him hard,’ you thought once your mind finally cleared. But Gojo’s hadn’t.

His head was still thrown back, tongue hanging out.

‘So lewd,’ you thought, a devious idea forming in your mind. With shaky legs, you stood up and reached for your pants to grab your phone.

Gojo didn’t even notice you holding it.

He reached down to touch his still-hard cock, wet with cum. He held it up, showing he was still painfully pent up.

“More pleash… fuck me more…” he mumbled, dazed.

You stroked yourself slowly, groaning, and took a photo.

“Looks like I’m not streaming tomorrow,” you muttered under your breath. “What the hell am I going to do with you?”

From far away, a certain long black-haired angel watched through his orb, eyes narrowing as he glared down at you.

“So dirty,” he muttered.

--------------------

[yumeka-sxf]

After the exciting start of a new Garden arc last time, today's new chapter did not disappoint either! First thing I noticed upon reading is - Yor's new outfit! (though you're not being very discreet with that "Garden" badge 😅)

Also that little lemur guy in the upper left of the panel is like "Wtf?!" I would think that too if a person suddenly leaped onto the tree branch next to me 🤣 (you can see him scurrying away in the next panel underneath...nice little detail from Endo there.)

Before I get into specifics of this chapter, I wanted to analyze the exchange between Yor and Hemlock in the jeep - namely, the Hemlock/Nightfall parallel, with Hemlock accusing Yor of losing her edge due to "playing house" for too long, which is exactly what Nightfall said to Twilight when she first appeared.

This made me think of an interview with Endo that was shared in the recent iterations of the SxF exhibition that's going on in Japan: when asked which character has changed the most in the series so far, he said Yor while also mentioning that Loid has barely changed. And I can see why that's the case with how Yor responded to Hemlock. Her experience during the cruise arc made her understand her own development - that now more than ever she wants to continue her work because she has more people she desires to protect.

She actually recognizes her own change and embraces it, while Loid...still hasn't gotten there yet. If we compare this exchange between Yor and Hemlock with the one between Loid and Nightfall, Loid clearly doesn't have this same self recognition about how living with the Forgers has changed him. He either genuinely doesn't know or he's in denial, which is why Nightfall is the one who points it out, and even when she tells him, he doesn't have a response.

One could argue that this may have been the case in old chapters, but ever since the mole hunt arc, he has recognized himself how he's changed. I do agree that the mole hunt arc made him realize that he's "softening" in a way, but he sees this as a detriment more than anything else. Unlike Yor who sees how her love for the Forgers has made her stronger, Loid sees it as something that will make him weaker rather than fuel his resolve.

We haven't seen much of Loid's deep inner thoughts since the end of the mole hunt arc, so only time will tell if he'll start to see his own development as something to be accepted rather than pushed away (just a note that I don't have a specific link for this part of the interview, but Fasionnessutsu shared screenshots of it in a thread here).

But anyway, back to other thoughts about this chapter, it was no surprise that even though Yor and McMahon changed into these safari-looking outfits, Hemlock is still wearing his suit. Why am I not surprised someone like him would totally refuse to wear that? 😂

And omg, the fact that Yor is still hung up about the "welcome home" kiss 😂 The fact that she's so earnest about it all this time later means...something, lol.

Also McMahon having a wife...it was kind of vague here but I wonder if she knows about his undercover work? Probably not, but would be interesting to see how much of his marital situation mirrors Yor's.

We apparently got another minor character introduced in this chapter - McMahon's pet falcon (and scouting assistant) Keekee.

In the Japanese version he calls her "Kiki-chan," with "kiki" being the sound she makes. It's nothing big, but I just found it amusing that a stoic, no-nonsense guy like McMahon calls his pet bird "-chan" 😅

The flower that Damian and company found has returned! I mentioned in my last chapter post that it may have some connection to Anya's past - we'll see!

This chapter ends on quite the cliffhanger, with Hemlock attacking Yor because, according to him, she's an impediment to his work and he's allowed to get rid of such impediments. We've already seen several examples of how quick to kill he is. Compared to Yor who tries her best to only kill "bad guys," Hemlock's first notion for anything in his way is to kill, whether it's the deer he's supposed to protect, or a fellow assassin he thinks is dragging him down.

Again, there's parallels that can be drawn between him and Nightfall, but unlike Nightfall whose obsession is fueled by idolizing Twilight, Hemlock's obsession seems to be fueled by animosity for Yor. Where that animosity came from is something we'll hopefully see in upcoming chapters. My theory is that, at some point, Hemlock idolized Yor and is now upset that she seems to have "softened," or he's always been jealous of her and now is even more enraged that she's not taking her job seriously anymore. Whatever the case is, I look forward to seeing how it plays out 👀

[thedevilsoftruth]

riding congressman bucky’s face. that’s it. that’s the request.

( ily and your writing, make sure to stay hydrated!! wishing you the best in everything!! <3 )

Thank you so much, anon. 💜💜

All I can say to that is yes. Yes yes yes.

Smooth

Congressman Barnes x F! Reader

Sum - an interview with a very hot congressman goes wrong.

W/c - less then 1k (if you would like a fuller version, please let me know!!

I do NOT consent to my work being reposted or translated on any website.

MDNI!! I am not responsible for what you find on the internet!!!

[my request box is currently open. PLEASE see my pinned post for more information regarding my request rules.]

You don't even know how it happened. One moment you're interviewing a congressman, and the next that same man is fingering you on his bed in his expensive penthouse. You'd be lying if you said it wasn't the absolute sexiest and hottest thing you'd ever been through. He was so persuasive and smooth. His flirting was subtle and was the kind that had your mind reeling and overanalyzing every single little thing he said. But his sex? Even better.

He'd been going at it for over and hour and a half, mouthing and slurping down your over-used and sensitive drooling cunt. He kept going and didn't seem to stop. He had your hands tied to his bedposts with the red wine tie he had previously worn to a campaign event that evening. Everything was so overwhelming and overestimating, especially since you weren't used to hook ups. Especially from ex assassins turned democratic congressmen.

So when he had wiped his mouth and soaked beard off with his white button down shirt and crawled up your body to untie you, you finally thought he was done. That was at least until he stripped himself of the white shirt dress shirt he was wearing and gave your wet pussy a slap with an even wetter palm (which you had previously came on four times.)

"Want you to come sit on my face." He panted, his voice scratchy and hoarse as he quickly threw the shirt on the ground like it had personally offended him. You blinked at him, your face flushed and sweaty with your hair sticking to it.

"Wha?" You breathe, confused and dazed. The both of you are so fucked out, but he is not stopping. Not until his jaw goes fucking numb. He lays onto the bed next to you, how heavy body plopping down into the mattress.

"Sit. On. My face." He commands, pointing to his face with a vibranium finger. You look down on him, confused. His patience snaps and he grabs your hips and throws you down onto his stomach.

"I'm not repeating myself again, babydoll. You either start riding it and soaking my fucking beard or I'll stop touching you all together." He huffs, his teeth gritted and his voice gruff with need. You never would have expected your congressman to have such an oral fixation, but you were not complaining. So, up you went; shaky legs parting as you positioned yourself above his head, your knees pressing deep into the mattress as you hovered above your face.

"Is this okay? Can you breathe?"you ask him worriedly, looking down at him. His eyebrows knit tightly, and his strong hands grab your hips and slam you down onto his face.

"Breathing's overrated." Is the last thing he says before his mouth was on you. His thick tongue licked a long line across your messy folds. Your head tipped back in pleasure, low moans escaping your mouth as he licked you up steady and slow. You're already so overstimulated and overwhelmed from the previous orgasms he pulled out of you, and he hadn't even fucked you yet.

You try to hover away from him. Instinctively. The pleasure is just too much for you to handle.

But his vibranium hand squeezes your hip and he spanks your ass with a flesh hand, making you yelp in surprise.

"No. None of that. Sit." He tells you, pushing you down onto his face. You pull off of him again, bracing your arms in the headboard for support.

"I just want to make sure you're okay--"

"I have your pussy on my mouth, of course I'm okay. Im not stopping until I make you cum or unless I black out. Now quit your yapping and let me eat."

You let him pull you back down onto his greedy lips, and he moans in approval the moment he feels your weight on him.

"Ride me." He says against your pussy, kissing your folds and flicking your clit with his tongue. You look down at him again, confused snd sex-dazed.

"Don't make me repeat myself." He said, gripping your flesh hard enough that you were sure he'd leave bruises behind. You whine and press your face into the headboard before slowly, steadily rolling your hips across his face. His nose bumps against your clit and you can feel his beard dampening at the warm slick of your used cunt. The full, thick streaks of facial hair brush against your inner thighs.

You bite down on your finger and moan loud, your hips rocking against your lovers face. The way his lips brush and caress your flesh should be a crime. The way he rolls his tongue against your clit and labia just feels so right but so wrong.

"Mr. Barnes," You moan, your hips beginning to stutter as they try desperately to keep up. "I c-cant--"

He pulls away and smacks your ass. You yelp aloud, gripping the headboard like it owed you money.

"Do you want me to tie your wrists together with my belt and muffle your mouth with my tie?" He questioned, looking at you with mean blue eyes that made your pussy flutter.

"N-no sir." You responded weakly, your voice wobbly with the rest of his threat.

"Then shut the fuck up and ride me like the good little journalist you are."

[dilfluvrgirllxoxo]

post mission arguments and make-ups

pairing: john f. walker x reader (i'm tired of hiding my truth he's been fine since tfatws)

warnings: angst!! grumpy x sunshine trope because i can't help myself, teeny bit of smut at the end, mostly just fluff, john is lowkey a little out of character but its okay, petnames (sweetheart, honey), no use of y/n + no reader descriptions, not proofread!

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the car ride back from the mission was silent except for the occasional conversation between ava and yelena. as soon as the car was parked, you got out and slammed the door harder than you meant to, walking away, not caring if john was following behind you.

kicking off your boots and tossing your bag onto the floor, you trudged over to the kitchen, pouring yourself a drink as the others scattered off to their rooms. not john though, no. he decided he just had to come and be a pain in your ass...again.

he stood against the doorframe, jaw clenched, face dark and his arms crossed tightly against his chest, like a parent ready to chastise their child.

"you always do that," he snapped after a long moment of silence, his voice sharp.

you froze, turning around to face him with a sigh. “do what, john?”

“do missions without us, without backup. going in first, acting like you’re invincible, like you don’t need anyone. it’s reckless."

“so now i'm the problem? i can handle myself john, i'm not on this team for nothing!”

his eyes narrowed, his hands clenching into fists as he stepped closer to you. “i'm trying to keep people alive, including you, including the rest of the team.”

“you're not in the goddamn army anymore john, stop acting like you can boss us around!” you yelled, knowing that was a low blow by the way his shoulders tensed.

“you don't get it. you want to get yourself killed by being foolish? be my damn guest!" he hissed, his fist coming down on the table next to him and you flinched—he saw it, and instantly regretted what he'd done, but his cold, dismissive words were out now, no going back.

“right. yeah.” you said, voice cracking. “got it.” you practically scurried away, walking into the bedroom and slamming the door, on purpose this time.

you lay on the bed for what felt like hours, letting your tears fall, not even turning your head when you heard the door open and john stepping inside cautiously. “hey honey.” you didn’t answer.

he walked closer, voice lower now as he sat on the edge of where you lay on the bed, sighing as he thought about what to say. he wasn't good with the whole 'letting your guard down' thing. “i shouldn’t have said that. any of it.” still nothing from you, making him shuffle closer and take your hand in his.

“i...was scared,” he admitted, and that word seemed to make him flinch, like he'd never said it in his life. “i thought you were in danger, and i—i panicked and then i lashed out at you.”

you turned on your back, finally meeting his eyes as you tilted your head. “it made me feel like you didn't care about me and it hurt, john.”

john’s normally stoic expression broke, just slightly, into a softer one, one only you ever got to see.

“i know,” he said. “but you’re the only person who makes me feel like i’m worth something, i do care about you, more than anything. i just wanted to make sure you didn't get hurt, and i ended up hurting you. i’m...i'm sorry.” he whispered the last words, not knowing how to feel. he never apologised. god, you were softening him up too much.

"i want to fix this, let me make it up t' you honey." he murmured, his voice gentler than you'd ever heard it be as he shuffled onto the bed fully, his arms at either side of you as he hovered above you. "cmon honey, wanna make this right, show y' how sorry i am."

you paused for a minute, tears now drying on your cheeks as you looked up at him and nodded, whispering a faint, “kay.” which was all the confirmation he needed as he nodded slowly, rough, calloused hands coming up to cup your cheeks with surprising gentleness, his mouth on yours before you even had time to think, the strength of the kiss making your head spin, barely registering his words when he finally pulled away breathlessly, tugging at the waistband of your trousers.

"want y' to sit on my face sweetheart, need t' taste you." he drawled, his request making your breath hitch as you stood up to peel your trousers off quickly, his hands grabbing your waist and easily manhandling you back onto the bed as soon as you were done.

safe to say, you'd soon forgiven him.

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[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

butterflygirl738 (5)

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as dubcon/noncon, power imbalance, sickness, medical bills, and other possible triggers. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You love butterflies and your mother, but life isn’t that simple. As life gets complicated, and expensive, you find yourself in need and an unexpected miracle presents itself.

Characters: Steve Rogers (CEO/Sugar Daddy)

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me <3

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Asking for more or putting ‘part 2?’ is not feedback.

Love you all. You are appreciated and your are worthy. Treat yourself with care. 💖

This is what you wanted, isn't it? For things to get easier? For some godsend to come and save you from the deepening pit of debt and despair?

Is that what S is? Is he really going to save you? And your mother? Can his money do that? Or are you just dragging out the inevitable? Is this also just denial? False hope? What do you call it?

There's some things you can see clearly he isn't lying about. The money. It's already in your account like he said. And his car screams rich. Richer than you could ever hope to be. A rental but not the type they give to someone with nothing in the bank.

You look out at your apartment building. Those second thoughts already have you nervously picking at the edges of your nails. You take a deep breath and look straight to the windshield.

"You okay?" S asks, startling you from your doubt.

"Yeah, yeah, I... I've never lied to my mom before. Not as big as this. I mean yeah, I lied about losing her pearl earrings in grade school but that lasted all of two hours..." You frame your face and sit back in the seat. "I'm rambling. I'm sorry." You drop your arms. "And I've wasted enough of your time."

"Not wasted. Honest," He leans his hand on the steering wheel. "I'm headed to the hotel to eat room service alone." He scoffs and gives a sardonic smile. "Exciting stuff. But uh... it's a nice suite."

"Hah, yeah. Must be weird being away from home," you sniff.

"Not much different. Still empty." He shrugs.

"Uh huh," you hum thoughtfully.

"Well, you can tell your mom you went for an interview? Got something new? That could explain... things as they come up."

You pick at your lip and nod. "Makes sense."

"I could mock stuff up for you. I mean, I have letterhead," he chuckles and rubs his neck. "I'm not a great liar either, sorry."

You chuckle thinly. "It feels... hopeless." You shake your head. "Not you. Just... alright. Gotta face the music." You look at him. "S, thank you. For lunch and being patient with me. Sometimes I feel like a piece of my brain is not there." You exhale and grab the door.

"Uh, wait, before you go," he grabs your other arm then quickly lets go. You sit back and look at him. "I'm gonna be in town for a few days. So, I was hoping tomorrow we could... spend some more time together."

Your lips part. That's a surprise. You just assumed you'd have more time to adjust. To process. Time. It's precious and you don't know how much you truly have.

"Oh, right," you breathe.

"Unless... " he draws out.

"Oh, oh, I... I thought maybe you had to go back. For your business," you say as you wring your hands. Your skin is raw. "I'm so sorry. I wasn't thinking and... you know, I have work but, I guess I'll be calling in."

"Sure, I didn't mean to blindside you. Sometimes I think things and just assume other people know," he clears his throat. "So, I'll pick you up tomorrow morning."

"Yeah," you agree and pull the handle, pushing the door out. "Please, go get some rest. You flew out here, it must've been a long day."

"It's sweet of you to think of me," he says.

"Good night," you smile and stand straight. You shut the door and turn to look up at the dingy apartment building.

You drag your feet forward. Your lips move silently as you rehearse your lies. You purse them and slant your mouth one way than the other.

You almost collide with someone else as they come out of the building. You step out of their way and wait. You glance back. S idles at the curb. You wave before you go inside.

You climb the stairs one at a time. You're wading through molasses. As you get to the apartment door, you hesitate. Stop. Get yourself together. This isn't against her, it's for her. This could save your mom.

You enter and the deja vu makes you feel out of place. Everything is as it should be yet it feels like it's all changed. Your mom is on the couch, reading, her head in her hand, her finger feeling the edge of her scarf. You shut the door gently.

"Hi mom," you say as you put your bag down. You sanitize your hands before you go any further. "How was your day?"

"Good," she sits up. "You were gone a while. I thought it was your day off."

"I'm sorry, I didn't... say." You linger by the entryway. "So, uh, I really didn't want to get my hopes up and... I thought I'd surprise you..." you let the words dangle. You watch her, waiting for her to challenge you. She looks tired. "I went for an interview and er, I got it."

"An interview?" She echoes.

"Yeah. It pays better, so I said yes... and... yeah."

"Another store?"

"Um... admin?" You say.

Her lashes flutter and she smiles. "Wow, that's great, pie. Very good." The book closes in her lap and she brings her hands up to her face. "Can you help me to bed? I'm feeling nauseous."

"Oh, of course, mom."

You near her and offer your arm. She gets up and you help her around the couch. She doesn't even have the energy to doubt you. She has bigger problems. She's staring down that abyss and you're worried about a little white lie. She doesn't need to know, she doesn't need to worry. She just needs to get better.

🦋

S arrives at nine. You're outside waiting. You're anxious, not excited. You feel bad enough leaving your mom for work, but this feels wrong. Not just that you're lying to her, but about what.

You get in the car as he smiles at you. "Good morning, I brought coffee," he announces proudly.

You look at the paper cups. You smile back. It feels strangely normal. This is what you see on TV. Real couples do this. This isn't real.

"Thanks, that's so nice," you say. You buckle in and peer around. You feel like you're being watched. Like one of the neighbours will tattle on you. "H--How was your night?"

"Not too bad. Watched a movie. Fell asleep before it ended," he snorts as he pulls away from the curb. "Old man hours."

"Ah," you nod. "I just read a bit. Checked on the butterflies."

"They getting close?" He asks.

"Yeah. Should be soon I think."

"Hm. Nice. You eat yet?" He asks.

"I had some toast." You answer.

"Cool. I hope you don't mind a bit of a road trip? I found this place in the next town. Has good reviews."

"Oh, it's totally up to you but... I don't want to be too much," you scratch your neck.

"This is the deal, right? Spending time together. So don't worry about being too much. Just try to enjoy yourself," he girds.

"Right, yes, I just... guess it's been a while since I did anything for fun. God, that sounds lame, doesn't it?" You ask.

"Lame or it means you've been working hard." He says.

"I guess so," you agree.

He drives on and you stare through the window. It's better that you leave town. It's not like you're well-known but you don't need to chance anyone seeing you with him. Out-of-towners always tend to inspire gossip. Mom doesn't go out much but...

Your mind won't stop. You try to calm it as the minutes tick by. Your worries are replaced by curiosity. Where exactly is he taking you?

Before you can assume the worst, you recognise the large stone behind the town sign. You haven't been around this way in years. He steers past the green park and through town square.

As he pulls in at the vaguely familiar yellow brick building, you can't help but pinch yourself. How could he know? Maybe just a lucky guess. You went to the conservatory once as a child. You realised later how expensive that birthday trip was.

"Here we are," S says. "I know it's nothing fancy."

"It's... it's great," you say. "I love this place."

"You've been here?"

"Not in ages but once," you answer.

"Ah, I should've figured."

He grabs his phone and wallet as the engine quiets. He gets out and slides them into his back pockets. You undo your belt and climb out as he comes around the car.

We waves you ahead of him toward the arched front doors. He pulls one open and lets you through first. He approaches the desk and takes out his phone. He has them scan his passes and puts it away again.

He turns to you and offers his hand. You stare for a moment before you accept. His skin is warm.

He takes you through the entryway to the first wing. Here they have all the antiquated inventions; funky looking glasses with stacked lenses and scientific tools you couldn't guess at the purpose of. You stop to read the placards as S leans in to admire the objects.

"Probably not your favourite part," he says.

"I don't mind. I like old things."

"Ah, me too. Maybe one day... well, who knows, I might take you to the museum in New York... but... who knows," he shrugs.

"Maybe," you say. You don't know about all that. That's a long way away.

You continue on around the winding exhibits and into the room with the live exhibits. Insects of all kinds. You let go of S and stop to watch the bees in the hive with a tunnel to the outside world. There's a little sign explaining that the conservatory houses the hive as a protective effort.

"They have a new part to it," S says. "I saw it on the website. Down that way."

"Oh," you back up. "Sure, whatever you want to do."

He leads you on. You admire the windows that look onto colonies and tunnels of different insects. You stop short at the next door. 'Butterfly Room.' You look at S. The last time you came, you remember there was one tiny little exhibit of unhatched chrysalis.

You rush through ahead of him in excitement. A blue flutter brushes over your forehead and another flap of yellow sweeps by. You spin as the lazy wings beat around you, others still as butterflies rest on petals or branches. It's a menagerie. A garden full of colours.

You turn and look all around. You're breathless and amazed. In that moment, there's nothing else but the beauty of those creatures.

You smile and tilt your head up. A monarch lands on your nose and you freeze. S laughs and you look over at him as he aims his phone at you. The butterfly flees.

He turns the screen to show you the picture. You blush and rock bashfully. "That's cute."

"It is," he agrees."

"S," you gasp, "this is amazing."

"It is." He looks around and lowers his phone. "It's nice to have someone to enjoy it with."

"It is," you cheep. You turn and follow the path of a white flutter.

You go to the bench and sit. It's bittersweet. It's nice to not be alone, but you wish it was your mom here with you. She's all you have but with her being sick, it only sinks in then, how lonely you've really been. She's there but not really. She's fighting a battle you can't understand.

S sits beside you. He's quiet. You blink away a glaze of tears.

"It's really beautiful," you say. "Thank you so much. I can't... I can't even begin to tell you how much..." You sniff. "How much I appreciate this."

"You don't have to say it," he assures you.

"But I should. There's so much I never say. So much to say. So much I might never have the chance..." you lower your head. "I'm really trying. I don't want to be sad. I don't want to ruin this day." You exhale. "You didn't pay to watch me mope."

"I did. I paid to be close to you. To be with you," he shifts closer. "And whatever that means, is fine with me." He puts his hand on yours, like the day before. It doesn't feel as strange anymore. "I don't want you to think about that. The money. I want you to have a nice day. With me."

You nod and gulp. You breathe out the emotion and look at him.

"Why?" You croak.

He stares at you. His cheek dimples. "I got lucky. I took a chance... and I met you."

He squeezes your hand and you look down. His hand wraps easily around yours. It makes you feel safe. It's been so long since you felt anything close to that.

[litsenn]

I was reading this post by @wendeeesaucy with the interesting addition by @michanvalentine and I wanted to add my two cents, but since you can't to put videos in an reblog, I need to make my own post.

It's a very interesting take about that "I love you" line in Act 1 and I like what is said about it in the aforementioned post (I recommend reading it). I've already talked at length about this whole dialogue and the irony in Astarion's behaviour, so I won't repeat myself here. I just want to say that what makes this "I love you" even more fascinating, is Astarion's reaction when you refuse to spend that second night with him.

He doesn't get angry, he doesn't even insist. Worse. He looks sad, disappointed, and he sounds absolutely down-hearted. Honestly, his reaction here breaks my heart.

He's surprised, he wasn't expecting it. And it's not just a question of pride.

At first he's sarcastic, an instinctive defence mechanism to pretend it doesn't matter.

Then, it feels like he's realising that he had found something special in you, and he opens up a little.

Had he clearly acknowledged how special this first night was before this moment? I don't know, but he clearly is embarrassed. He hesitates, he reflects, his diction is faster than usual: "Thattimewasspecialtome" - he almost mumbles it, barely articulating the words. He shows a vulnerability we have never witnessed in him so far at this point of the adventure.

Then, he has this moment of dissociation, right after he tells you he'll remember you.

He escapes to his mental world for a moment, the harsh truth hitting too hard: you're rejecting him, rejecting the only thing he thinks he's good at. You're making the first night nothing more than a one night stand. Just a meaningless fuck.

It's not surprising that his last "dear" sounds so bitter. He won't have a fine evening.

It seems like you just crushed down the few hopes he had dared to have. And maybe he hadn't realised it until now, but he looks and sounds so disillusioned and hurt that I can't help thinking that at this point, he had started to imagine something else could be possible with you.

And now the first sarcastic line about his "broken heart" doesn't sound so acerbic anymore. Maybe you didn't "break" his heart, but you definitely hurt it.

And this simple, apparently mischievous answer, suddenly appears as much more meaningful. It's exactly like this "I love you", the other side of the same coin.

You think he's jesting, and at first you don't know if he's scornful, bitter, playful... But when you take a closer look at it, you realise there's some truth in it. Maybe an exaggerated truth, but still "something real".

[crossbackpoke-check]

blessed be (lorscher bienensegen) | telling the bees (wiþ ymbe)

"Bees" [remixed, abridged], Claudia Emerson // "Letter to Someone Living Fifty Years from Now" [remixed. abridged], Matthew Olzmann // "Letter to my Great, Great Grandchild" [remixed, abridged], J.P. Grasser | Len Redkole, Nina Weiss, Brian Babineau, Christian Peterson, Mitchell Leff, Dave Isaac, Megan DeRuchie

[add1ctedt0you]

Novel quotes: wei wuxian having feelings/thoughts about jiang cheng

Under the cut because it's long

However, Jiang Cheng was gone. Holding steamed buns, flatbreads, and fruits in his hands, Wei WuXian felt his heart skip a beat. He forced himself to calm down. Even after he searched through the neighboring streets, he still didn’t see Jiang Cheng. He finally began to panic. Grabbing a cobbler on the side, he asked, “Mister, there was a young master about the same age as me sitting here. Did you see where he went?” The cobbler licked the thick end of a thread, “The one that was with you?” Wei WuXian, “Yeah!”

The cobbler, “I was in the middle of doing something so I didn’t really see. But he kept on spacing out, staring at the people on the street. And then when I looked up at where he was again, he suddenly disappeared. Maybe he left.”

Wei WuXian murmured, “... He left... He left...”

He probably left for Lotus Pier to steal the bodies!

As though he had gone mad, Wei WuXian sprinted immediately toward the direction that they had come from.

[...]

He gave himself a harsh scolding in silence—he was stupid, useless, ridiculous, it was bizarre, unimaginable. Yet, he was alone, without a sword or any tools, and on the other side of the wall there were thousands of Wen Sect’s cultivators, perhaps Wen ZhuLie as well.

He wasn’t scared of death. He was only scared that after he died, he wouldn’t be able to save Jiang Cheng and betray the trust that Jiang FengMian and Madam Yu left him. In such circumstances, the only one he could place his hope on was a person of the Wen Sect whom he had met only three times in total!

[...]

Wei WuXian’s gaze turned from Wen Ning toward Jiang Cheng, whose body was covered in blood and eyes were tightly shut. His fingers couldn’t help but clenched into fists.

Chapter 59 Poisons—Part Four

Jiang Cheng’s expression was rather strange. It was calm, almost too calm. He stared at the ceiling, as though he wasn’t at all interested in the situation that he was in, as though he didn’t care about where he was either. Wei WuXian didn’t expect him to react in such a way. Sadness, happiness, anger, shock—he had none of these. His heart skipped a beat, “Jiang Cheng, can you see me? Can you hear me? Do you know who I am?” Jiang Cheng glanced at him. He didn’t say anything. Wei WuXian asked him a few more questions. Arm supporting himself, he finally sat upright. He looked down at the mark of the discipline whip on his chest before laughing bitterly. If the discipline whip struck, it’d be impossible to wipe away the mark of shame. Wei WuXian comforted him despite this, “Stop looking at it. There has to be a way to get it off.” Jiang Cheng slapped him. His strike was so weak, so powerless that Wei WuXian didn’t even flinch, “Hit me. As long as you’ll feel better.”

[...]

If Wei WuXian were the one injured or if somebody else had saved them, he’d immediately say farewell and leave at once, full of determination. However, right now, Jiang Cheng was the one who had been injured. Not only was he injured, he had lost his core as well. He wasn’t in his right mind. No matter what, Wei WuXian couldn’t find any determination.

Chapter 60 Poisons—Part five

Out of the blue, Jiang Cheng spoke up, “Not to do what?” Wei WuXian paused in surprise, turning to him along with Lan WangJi. Jiang Cheng covered his wound with one hand, his voice chilly, “Wei WuXian, you’re such a great, selfless person. You did the best things possible, and you swallowed all the suffering and didn’t let anyone know. What a touching story. I should kneel down and cry in gratitude, shouldn’t I?” Hearing the mocking tone that lacked any courtesy, Lan WangJi’s face grew cold. Jin Ling saw the displeased expression and immediately stood in front of Jiang Cheng, scared that Lan WangJi would kill him with one strike, “Uncle!” Wei WuXian’s expression worsened as well. He never expected Jiang Cheng to make up with him after he found out the truth, but he didn’t think his tone would be as unkind as ever, either. With a moment of silence, he replied, voice muffled, “I never asked you to thank me.”

[...]

In the beginning, it was precisely because he didn’t want to see such a Jiang Cheng that he decided not to tell him.

He remembered every single thing he promised Jiang FengMian and Madam Yu—to help and take care of Jiang Cheng. If someone as unhealthily competitive as him found out about this, he’d be dispirited his whole life, too tortured to face himself. There’d always be something he could never overcome, reminding him that he could only reach where he was because of another’s sacrifice. It wasn’t at all his cultivation and his achievement. No matter if he won or lost, he’d long since lost the right to compete.

Afterwards, it was because Jin ZiXuan and Jiang YanLi died for him that he had no face to let others know. To tell Jiang Cheng after what happened then would be like shirking responsibility, hurrying to demonstrate that he’d contributed as well. It’d be like telling Jiang Cheng, don’t hate me, look I’ve contributed to the YunmengJiang Sect too.

Chapter 102- Hatred - Part Five

At this point, somebody on the side suddenly called, “Wei WuXian!”

Wei WuXian answered immediately, “What?”

Only after he answered did he realize that the one who called him was Jiang Cheng. Wei WuXian felt somewhat surprised. Jiang Cheng didn’t respond directly. Instead, he took something out from his sleeve and tossed. Wei WuXian caught it by instinct and looked, only to find a black, gleaming flute along with a crimson tassel.

It was the ghoul flute, Chen Qing!

As he felt the flute that he was more than familiar with, Wei WuXian didn’t even have the spare time to feel surprised.

Chapter 108: Concealment - Part Two

After a pause, he asked again, “How have Sect Leader Jiang and Jin Ling been?”

Lan JingYi pouted, “They seem pretty fine. Sect Leader Jiang is the same as before, always lashing out at people with his whip. Young Mistress’s temper has been getting better. In the past he could talk back thrice to his uncle after he scolds him once. Now he can do ten times.”

[...]

Hearing Lan JingYi say so, Wei WuXian relaxed slightly. In truth, he knew that these weren’t what he really wanted to ask. But as it sounded like Jiang Cheng and Jin Ling had been doing quite well, there was nothing left to say.

Chapter 116: Extra—Banquet - Part Three

[fantasy-girl974]

Spoilers for Ace Attorney Investigations 2: Prosecutor's Gambit

So, I just completed part 1 of AAI2-5 (and good lord, it took me 3 hours, I didn't think it would take this long!). And during the Mind Chess with Eustace / Sebastian (protecc this poor boy omg 😭), I came across this conversation between Miles and him, and the little difference with how he calls Phoenix is interesting between french and english.

Little side notes : English name = French name Miles Edgeworth = Benjamin Hunter Eustace Winner / Sebastian Debeste = Eustache Victor

[French translation]

Hunter : Vous savez… parler de tout cela avec vous, cela m'aide aussi. Pendant un temps, je ne voulais pas faire face non plus à certaines vérités. Mais quelqu'un qui m'est cher m'a montré que je faisais erreur.

You know... Talking about all this with you, it helps me too. For a while, I didn't want to face certain truths either. But someone dear to me showed me I was mistaken.

Eustache : C'est… une belle histoire… *sniff* mais… je n'ai… personne pour m'aider… *sanglot*

It's... a beautiful story... *sniff* but... I have... no one to help me... *sob*

***** [Official English translation]

Edgeworth : Listen -- talking with you like this. It's helpful for me, too. There was a time where there were thruths I didn't want to face up to, either. But a good friend taught me the error of my ways.

Eustace : That's… nice… But I don't have… anybody like that… *sob*

*****

If (as I think) it's about Phoenix here, well this is not the first time in the french version where he talks about him so highly compare to the english version sometimes. There was another moment (during AAI2-2 iirc) where he calls him "a renowned / illustrious defense attorney" in french. HMMMM (≖_≖ )

[sysig]

Is this small and pixely enough that it’s not a spoiler

[pardonmydelays]

i think my biggest problem is that i've always been this kind of friend who's like "i may not understand your favourite thing in the world but i'm here to listen, support it with all my heart and be excited about it with you", so i kinda expect my friends to do the same thing for me. if it matters to you, it's important.

[akai-anna]

you know. the fact that shinichi would have fckin died along with ran if it came to that. he would have stayed with her till the very end. bc without ran in his life, shinichi wouldn't have been able to live.

and that fucks me up.

[fantasticalleigh]

we talk a fair game about hating AI on here but there's that one extremely obvious AI made reylo fanart that keeps floating around from time to time and a lot of people have fallen for it and reblogged it and the person behind the account makes a ton of other AI art using disney characters and i try not to get annoyed about it because at first glance it's kind of convincing if you don't know what to look for but i think as a whole we need to get better about recognizing AI art if we're saying we're not going to support it. idk. t

[sporco-filth]

Good shit as always with slob city. Reverse manners always gets me going, the idea that belching and farting and other slobbish habits are polite and not doing them is rude is soooo good. Kinda wonder if they put up PSA posters around the city reminding folks about "good" behavior.

The lazy app is great as well, something tells me that Lee is going to be hitting alot of goals the longer he stays in slob city.

they wouldn't have posters or stuff purely because it's such an ingrained behaviour and it just comes naturally to let it out anyway, so if no one corrects you you're not gonna hold it in (sorry if that's disappointing but you can go ahead and imagine they do since nothing I write will contradict that).

I didn't explain this in the story becauseI forgot/thought it was self-evident, but the reason why not burping after a meal is especially rude is because they consider burping a sign you've enjoyed your meal. So if you purposefully choose to not burp, you are very explicitly saying you thought the food was bad. And it's like, a really really serious insult.

I'm not quite sure if not farting would be seen as equally rude, but farting in and of itself is often a sort of way to show affection and how comfortable and close you are, so by not doing it you're being kind of cold and distant to people. burping is viewed similarly, btw

and yes, the app. It might just be the thing that finally pushes him to give in completely. literally everything around him is encouraging him and now even his phone is telling him to be lazier

I have a feeling I might be getting to the end of the 'main story' of Slob City, if only because I expect it'll be a pretty swift descent to slobdom from here on. but as always, the end of a story doesn't mean I can't reuse the setting and characters. And if you're after more stories of people becoming slobs, then I've got plenty new stories on the cards

[queer-omens-in-the-archives]

to care enough to carry on

Relationship: Mello/Near Rating: T Chapters: 1/1 Words: 300 (triple drabble) Series: sweet atonement (prequel & companion piece to pretender)

While Mello is unquestionably real, in the throes of Near's denial he is not. Most of their life passes him by, in a blur, in the dreamlike state of having been granted (a second) full existence without the self-awareness that being alive (again) usually brings.

Tags: Post-Canon, Dissociation, Depersonalization, Multiplicity/Plurality, Near's Mello Introject, (and thorough denial thereof on Near's part), Implied/Referenced Character Death, Dead Mello | Mihael Keehl, (introject!Mello is alive technically but it's complicated)

[read on AO3]