#so I'm trying to enjoy it while I'm heavily fixated on it

[kookslastbutton]

Guilty Pleasures ༓ jjk, kth (m) | chapter v

✑ Summary: Three years of being Seoul's power couple earns you nothing but a big fat divorce settlement and your face plaster on every gossip column around town. You're angry, hurt, and desperately want to move on, but worst of all? You're still in love with the man who started the whole mess, even though the most he can ever see you as is a friend. The renowned actor you've hired to be your company's new endorser seems to have a soft spot for you though. He's easy on the eyes, you'll admit, but who actually wants a divorcee like yourself? It's unrealistic really.

pairing: ex-husband ceo!jungkook x ceo!reader, actor!taehyung x ceo!reader

genre/AU: angst, smut, fluff, loverstoexesto ?, coworkers2?, unrequited love

Word count: 14k+

Warnings: oc and jk are both 30, Taehyung is 32, swearing, tornado of emotions, morally grey characters, mentions of toxic relationships, mentions of broken home/families, mean relatives, mentions of therapy, struggles of self-blame, regret, guilt, denial, self-deprecating in some areas etc., mentions of alcohol consumption, mentions of sexism in the media and business world, there is one scene depicting some physical violence (tame) , finally some fluff!, and I won't spoil any more

playlist: Unkiss Me, Apologize, Hate That I Love You, etc.

a/n: OMG....ignore the fact that this is releasing a month after ch. 4. 🫠 i'm sorry. On the bright side, I'm VERY excited to share this with you AND this actually isn’t the last chapter. There’s one more after! I hope you enjoy 🥰 ALSO, this is GP!Taehyung in this chapter (....😮‍💨)

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"This can't be right," you mutter to yourself for the umpteenth time, eyes heavily fixated on your laptop screen. You've been scrolling through the latest press releases all morning, a cup of tea growing cold beside you.

Ever since Jimin’s text last week, rumors about your ex-husband stepping down from his position at JeonX practically spread like wildfire, with nearly every journalist adding their individual spin on the matter—some suggest personal issues, while others hint at possible disagreements within the company.

Despite the influx of information, however, it all remains too vague and inconclusive. An official statement from the company directly would help clear up speculations, but it’s been crickets. Their silence only makes you consider the validity of the rumors even more.

Why would they make such a critical leadership change right after their newest product launch though?

This question, among others, continuously swirl in the back of your mind and you find the entire predicament ironic. You used to be one of the first to know the ins and outs of the company, easily able to distinguish the truth. Now, you're left in the dark like everyone else, dependent on the media for answers.

Before your eyes have time to skim the next group of articles on your screen, your phone rings.

It's Taehyung.

“Hey,” you answer casually, momentarily forgetting the significance of the call.

“Morning!” His voice is gravelly yet carries a cheerful tone. He seems quite upbeat for a foggy Saturday at 8 a.m. “Are you still okay to carpool to my parents' place today? Tan and I are on our way over.”

Dammit. Of course, this isn’t just any old Saturday—it’s the day of Taehyung’s family gathering. It had slipped your mind that you asked to ride together a few days prior. Given that it would be a five-hour long commute, driving separately seemed less convenient and enjoyable. Besides, you’d miss out on having Tan on your lap, his head poking out of the passenger-side window.

“Yeah, I’m good to go,” you reply, trying to sound more confident than you feel. “I’ll be ready when you get here.”

“Great! See you soon.” Taehyung hangs up, and you put your phone down with a deep breath.

To be blunt, you're still extremely nervous about the affair. Surely his family knows who you are and has seen their fair share of articles about you. So how will they react when you show up next to Taehyung at their family function? He says they’ll like you, but it's hard to accept.

Nonetheless, you know how important this family gathering is to him and how much he wants you to be there. Not only is it a family event, but it’s also a celebration of his recovery from a motorcycle accident that could’ve been much worse.

As you pour your cold cup of tea down the sink, you try to push away the unsettling mix of thoughts, focusing instead on the next task at hand— how you should dress. Prior conversations with Taehyung advise you that something polished would be ideal for the occasion, as his family appreciates a touch of elegance, yet your mind blanks on a tangible option. Surely, there’s something in the back of your closet that would do the trick. Right?

Well…you’re right-ish.

Upon searching through rows of hangers, arms growing tired, you finally find a somewhat suitable sundress. You’re hoping it won’t look too casual, but you don’t seem to have a better alternative with your closet currently overtaken by work clothes.

Wasting no further time, you quickly slip the dress over your head and observe how it fits in the mirror. Not bad, you think, before deciding on a few complimentary jewelry pieces. The saving grace of this choice of clothing is that it can easily be dolled up, which is exactly what’s needed today.

Soon, you hear the muffling of an engine and when you peek through your bedroom window, you’re unsurprised to see Taehyung’s car pull into the driveway with a very excited Tan poking his head out from the backseat. A small smile forms on your lips at the sight.

Sparing one final look in the mirror, you slide into your shoes, toss your bag over a shoulder, and head outside to meet them.

“Hey!” Per usual, you're met with a warm smile as you hop into Taehyung's car but before you can return the greeting, Tan bounds onto your lap, tail wagging eagerly. “God, I’m so sorry about him,” Taehyung reaches for his dog, but you quickly reassure him it’s alright.

“I’m happy to see you too, Tan,” you laugh, petting him affectionately. Your focus then shifts over to Taehyung, "Thanks for coming to get me."

“Of course,” he replies, smile widening as he watches Tan settle into your lap. “I’m really glad you’re coming with me," he continues, pulling away from the curb. "My parents are looking forward to meeting you.”

You nod, trying to calm your fluttering nerves. “I’m looking forward to meeting them too.” This time, when you glance his way, you take in his attire—a crisp white button-up shirt, sleeves rolled to the elbows, and black dress pants. It’s a classic look, yet it seems oddly refreshing on him. It's not like you expected Taehyung to look bad or anything; far from it, but did he always have to look this good? A queasy feeling soon settles in the pit of your stomach...maybe you should have worn something else.

Before you're able to fully turn away from him, Taehyung speaks up. “You look really nice today,” he says softly, eyes lingering over your face and down your body before shyly refocusing on the road. “That dress is beautiful on you—it really suits you.”

“Oh, thank you,” you reply with a shy smile of your own, unexpectant of his comment. “You don’t look half bad yourself.”

Something about the subtle exchange of compliments stirs a bundle of nerves in both of you and even with averted eyes, neither of you finds it entirely unpleasant.

The rest of the drive is long, but luckily, soon fills with lighthearted conversation and laughter. It's become easier and easier to be around Taehyung, you think.

After more than a few bathroom breaks—mostly due to Tan’s persistent whining—you finally catch sight of Taehyung’s parent’s house.

It’s even more picturesque than you imagined, with its charming architecture and well-tended garden. In the distance, the ocean glimmers, tying the scene perfectly together.

“I meant to mention earlier, but my parents have an oceanfront view,” Taehyung says casually, pulling up to the house. “We can go down there later if you’d like. It’s private access.”

“Really?” You glance over at him with anticipation, your excitement clear. You can already taste the saltiness of the water. “If it’s really okay, I’d love that.”

“It’s more than okay,” he assures with a smile. “In fact, it’s a done deal. The best time to go is in the evening. We can even use the excuse that we need to take Tan for a little stroll if necessary. Family bonding can get a bit overwhelming without a few breaks.” He lets out a chuckle but stops when he notices your slightly demure expression.

“Hey,” he turns to you with gentle eyes. “Everything okay?”

You blink, momentarily pulled from your thoughts. “Oh, yeah, sorry. I was just thinking it’s been a while since I’ve gone to any kind of family affair. They know I’m coming, right?”

Understanding your apprehension, Taehyung shifts the gear into park and places a light hand on your arm. “Absolutely, and please believe me when I say they’re more than ready and excited to meet you. They’ve asked about you so many times—I’m pretty sure I’ve lost count. I’m really happy you’re here with me too, so I hope you don’t feel like you’re intruding because I promise you’re not at all. And if at any point you need a moment to yourself, take it. I want you to feel as comfortable as possible, and I’m confident my family will want the same.”

With his hand on your arm, you find yourself wrapping yourself in the comfort of the gesture, nerves slowly easing in the process. “Thanks, Tae,” you reply, feeling a tad lighter than before.

“Are you ready?”

You nod, signaling him to remove his hand to take the key out of the ignition. As his hand leaves your arm however, you feel a subtle, unexpected shift—wishing the warmth of his touch could linger just a moment longer.

But hold up.

Since when did he affect you like this?

Dwelling on it further proves to be futile because before you can blink, the house’s front door swings wide open, revealing an older, petite woman with a kind and inviting smile. You both step out of the car immediately, Tan happily trotting around the yard confidently.

The woman pulls Taehyung into a big hug once close enough, and it’s all the evidence you need to deduce that she must be his mother.

“We were wondering where you were!” she starts. “Everyone’s here except you.” It’s a light scold, not that Taehyung minds from the giant grin spreading across his face.

“Forgive me, Mom. I guess we’re fashionably late,” he replies.

Mrs. Kim looks up and down her son with adoration, hands still gripping his arms. “Look at you,” she coos, as if proud. “My son is so handsome. I’m so happy to see you here, healthy and well.”

“Mom, this is __.”

Her eyes then shift to you, standing somewhat awkwardly beside them. If possible, her warm expression brightens even more, taking you by surprise.

“My goodness, I’m being so rude," she says, stepping toward you. "It’s wonderful to finally meet you, honey. Are you okay with hugs?”

“Sure.” You offer a sincere smile and embrace her. When you do, you feel a sense of peacefulness that you hadn’t ever before, soothing any lingering tension. You can’t help but assume that many of Taehyung’s qualities must come from her.

“I’m so pleased that my son brought you today,” she says, pulling back from the hug. She takes in your clothing as well. “You're absolutely lovely, my dear. Doesn't this color work wonderfully on her?” She glances at Taehyung, who merely nods in agreement.

“You’re the one who looks beautiful, Mrs. Kim,” you return the compliment, feeling a tad embarrassed by all the praise. “I love your earrings by the way. Are they jade?”

She nods, pleasantly. “Thank you for noticing. They’re indeed jade. My husband gifted them to me for our anniversary last year. I told him he didn’t need to get me anything, but that man is so persistent. Speaking of which, you should come inside and meet him.” She turns around at once and ushers you and Taehyung into the house. He allows you to go first.

As you follow Mrs. Kim up the steps, Tan bounds ahead excitedly. The aroma of delicious food fills the air the further you walk, and soon you’re greeted by a cozy, homey atmosphere.

Finally, you find Taehyung’s father in the kitchen, washing his hands at the sink. “Honey, Taehyung’s here and he brought __ with him.” Upon hearing your name, the man quickly dries his hands on a towel and extends a friendly hand your way, eyes twinkling.

“Hello, __! I’m glad you could come today. We’ve heard so much about you.”

“Likewise,” you reply, “Thank you for welcoming me into your home. It’s gorgeous in here.”

“Well, we have our son to thank.” He directs his attention to Taehyung, reaching out and patting his son on the back with a proud smile. “He bought this house for us after all. He’s a good son.”

What?

You glance at Taehyung in surprise, intrigued to learn more about this new bit of information. However, seemingly flustered by the comment, you decide it’s better to save it for another time. His mother is quick to step in.

“Taehyung, dear, why don’t you show __ around and introduce her to everyone?” she suggests smoothly. “They’re all in the living room. We’ll gather everyone to have lunch soon.”

Taehyung nods at the suggestion and begins leading you through the house, until you reach the living room at the end of the hall. The room is even larger than you anticipated upon entering, its high ceilings finished with a delicate glass chandelier. A grand piano sits in the far corner as well where a number of children huddle together, each taking turns playing a few notes.

One by one, Taehyung starts introducing you to his relatives and despite your initial apprehension, each person you meet greets you with nothing but warmth and kindness. Not even a single person shows discomfort towards you or makes a dig into your personal life (though you’re certain they’re well aware of who you are). It’s no wonder Taehyung boasts about his family so often—they truly are a close-knit and respectable group of people.

At least, that’s what you think until Taehyung asks, “Where's Auntie and Uncle? I haven’t seen them yet.”

One of Taehyung’s cousins looks a bit hesitant before replying, “Oh, Tae, I’m sorry, but we haven’t heard anything from them so they might not be coming today. Maybe they had last-minute plans. It’s a bit of a shame, really.”

An odd silence settles over the room at this, conversations lower in volume, and a few knowing glances are exchanged among relatives. The abrupt shift seems to throw a wrench into your previous statement of closeness since, evidently, the absence of Taehyung’s aunt and uncle casts a dark shadow over the cheerful gathering.

Sensing an awkward lull, Taehyung tries to lighten the mood with a bright smile. “Well, I’m sure we’ll still have a great time. I’m just happy to see everyone here.” He gently redirects the conversation to something more upbeat, attempting to remedy the unusual tension.

Just then, a small figure bursts into the room, capturing everyone’s attention.

A little girl, no more than six or seven years old, runs straight toward Taehyung with arms outstretched. “Taetae!” she shouts, using the affectionate nickname as she latches herself around his legs.

Taehyung's face breaks into possibly the happiest grin you’ve seen in response as he kneels to lift her up effortlessly, holding her close as she giggles. “Hey, sweetheart! I missed you!” His voice is filled with affection, though there’s a hint of shock as well.

Eagerly, the little girl secures her arms around his neck. “I missed you too! Mommy and Daddy said we might not be able to come, but here we are!”

“Well, I'm so glad! Have you been a good girl for your parents?” he asks with a playful tone.

The little girl nods vigorously. “Yes! I’ve been helping Mommy with so much lately.”

“Good job!” Taehyung says, giving her a high five.

You’re unsure exactly how the two relate, but the longer you watch the interaction unfold, the more evident it becomes that Taehyung’s a natural at connecting with children. His playful demeanor and patience make it clear that he has a special way with them. It’s heartwarming to see, quite honestly.

“Taetae, who’s she?” the little girl asks suddenly, her big, curious eyes setting on you.

Taehyung smiles and gestures for you to come closer. “This is __. She’s my friend.” He looks at you and adds, “This is my little cousin Eun-ha. We’re quite close.”

“Hi, Eun-ha,” you greet with a soft smile. “It’s so nice to meet you.”

She doesn’t return your greeting, but rather leans into Taehyung’s ear and whispers something you can’t quite hear.

Taehyung chuckles softly, though it does little to conceal your curiosity. “No, Eun-ha,” he says, shaking his head. “We don’t kiss like in my movies. But yes, she's very pretty.”

Though you wish otherwise, your surprise is barely hidden as you process the revelation.

“Why not?” Eun-ha asks, puzzled. “You kiss lots of pretty people in the movies.”

Flustered, Taehyung clears his throat. “Who’s letting you watch my shows? You’re a little young for those I think.”

“She likes to watch them when she can’t see you,” a new voice interjects.

Following the voice, you see two adults entering the room– Taehyung’s aunt and uncle. Their expressions are clearly stiff and somewhat distant, a stark contrast to the warmth of the rest of the family.

“Well, I guess it’s okay then,” Taehyung responds, maintaining his usual beaming smile. “Auntie, Uncle, it’s good to see you.”

His aunt and uncle offer polite but somewhat curt greetings.

“Glad to see you’re alright, Taehyung,” his aunt says, her tone lacking warmth.

“Hello,” his uncle adds, his expression neutral. “I see you’ve brought a guest.” He nods toward you.

“Yes, this is __,” Taehyung introduces you, “She’s a friend of mine and a colleague as well.”

The pair glance at you briefly, their eyes betraying a lack of interest.

“Nice to meet you,” his aunt says, though the thickness in her tone suggests otherwise.

“Likewise,” you respond, trying to match their formality with a friendly smile.

“You know, when I heard my nephew was bringing a guest, I wasn’t quite sure what to expect,” she continues, though the implication is unclear.

“I’m sorry?” you ask, trying to grasp her meaning.

“My apologies. I work as an editor for a journalism outlet, so I’ve come across your name before,” she explains. “It’s always interesting to see people in person after reading about them. I can’t say I ever imagined having the opportunity today.”

“Oh,” you say, trying to keep your composure. “I hope the coverage has been accurate.” You know they haven’t been, aside from a couple of progressive news outlets. Based on her rigid stare, you don’t think she belongs to either of them.

“They’re accurate most of the time,” she replies, her eyes narrowing slightly. “Although, there are always…different perspectives on such matters.”

You offer a polite, tight-lipped smile in response. Despite your best efforts to remain composed, however, your hands unconsciously clench into fists at your sides, indicating your bubbling discomfort.

“Well, I’m sure those articles are just one side of the coin,” Taehyung chimes in, attempting to smooth over the conversation. “I’m of the mindset that you really don’t know a person until you spend time with them. And I can assure you, those overpriced tabloids have it all wrong.” He shoots you a reassuring look.

In the midst of it all, Taehyung’s father steps into the room, oblivious to the tension. “Alright everyone, it’s time to eat!” he announces, his voice carrying a cheerful note. “Let’s gather around now.”

Neither you nor Taehyung’s aunt speak another word to each other as you follow his father into the dining room. You take a deep breath along the way, an attempt to steady yourself.

As lunch begins, Taehyung’s father stands at the head of the table, a broad smile on his face as he raises a glass.

“We want to thank everyone for being here today to celebrate Taehyung’s recovery,” he begins, his voice filled with heartfelt sincerity. “We’re grateful for this family and for the love and support that has carried us through. To Taehyung!”

“To Taehyung!” everyone echoes, lifting their glasses in a unified cheer.

From then on, the meal progresses smoothly, with conversation gradually returning to pleasant topics. Dishes are passed around, and laughter helps lighten the mood. Taehyung’s parents share stories of their journey together, their voices rich with wisdom and nostalgia. As you listen, you get a glimpse of the morals that have shaped their family. It’s so different from your own upbringing, and you feel honored to be a part of it today.

Yet it's still difficult to ignore the lingering heaviness in your chest from your earlier interaction with Taehyung’s aunt. Even now, her sour expression is directed your way, though she seems to withhold her remarks, perhaps due to Mr. and Mrs. Kim’s presence.

Don’t take this personally, you repeat in your head. There’s likely some underlying history or traditional views being projected onto you. This isn’t really about you…don't take it personally.

Midway through the meal, Taehyung’s mother intrigues everyone by pulling out a collection of old photographs. She begins sharing the backstories of various childhood photos of Taehyung, the corners of her eyes crinkling with joy and amusement as she recounts each memory. Taehyung, visibly flustered, tries to hide his blush as his family teases him.

“Oh, look at this one!” his mother exclaims, holding up a particularly old photo of a much younger Taehyung with a hilariously exaggerated hairstyle. “He was so determined to be a rock star!”

The room bursts into laughter, and Taehyung grins sheepishly, his cheeks rosy. “Is this really necessary? I mean __’s here…”

“Come on, Tae, it’s cute!” you say with a smile, giving his arm a playful shove. As you do, Taehyung’s aunt’s eyes widen slightly. Her gaze shifts sharply between you two, and a flicker of disapproval crosses her face. You stop your playfulness upon first notice, finding it hard to ignore.

“It’s embarrassing,” Taehyung retorts, unaware of his aunt’s reaction.

“Oh hush,” his mother replies with a warm smile. “Let a mother indulge in the memories of her children. You’re all grown up now, and with your busy schedule, I hardly see you anymore.”

“Alright, fair point,” Taehyung concedes. “Carry on.”

When the meal winds down, Taehyung’s aunt clears her throat and speaks up. “Is everyone ready for dessert? I’ve baked a homemade cake,” she announces, tone carrying a hint of forced cheerfulness. Turning to you, she adds, “Would you mind assisting me in the kitchen, __? I could use an extra hand.”

Taehyung immediately offers to help, but his aunt insists on speaking with you alone, masking it as an opportunity to get to know you better.

Once you’re in the kitchen and away from prying eyes and ears, Taehyung’s aunt’s demeanor shifts abruptly. She returns to her previous blunt and unreserved nature. “I need to be honest with you,” she begins, her voice low and steely. “I don’t think you should be here.”

Her words sting, yet a part of you can’t help but wonder if there’s some merit to them.

“I know this is a family event, and I’m sorry if it seems like I’m intruding. Taehyung invited me.”

“No, that’s not what I meant,” she dismisses, venom lacing her tone. “I mean, you shouldn’t be here with Taehyung.”

“I’m not sure what you’re referring to—”

“Oh please, don’t pretend I don’t have eyes, Ms. __,” she interjects sharply. The use of your formal name sends a chill down your spine. “You may be friends now, but I can see there’s more going on beneath the surface. Unlike the rest of my family, I won’t just stand by and let it happen. So, if you think you can charm your way into my nephew’s life just like you did with that ex-husband of yours, then you’re mistaken. I won’t allow you to ruin his life.”

Ruin his life? You ruined Jungkook’s life and now you are about to ruin Taehyung’s? Confused and hurt, you finally realize the root of the matter–she's convinced you’re a gold digger.

You’re stunned by the accusation, struggling to find words as she continues. “There’s nothing you can say to change my mind either. Even if the articles aren’t exactly true, you still have a past, and Taehyung deserves better—someone without all these complications. Don’t you agree? Maybe if you hadn’t been married before and were ten years younger, things might be different. But honestly? A woman your age should already have a family of her own.”

Silence falls heavily in the kitchen after her final words, the only sound being your labored breaths. Your throat goes dry and your hands clammy as some of your deepest insecurities take root, striking right at your core.

It’s true—you’re 30 years old, divorced, and without children. It’s a stark contrast to your peers.

You’d always imagined your life turning out differently, but here you are, alone and without any kind of companionship. You weren’t expecting to be reminded of it all today.

“I think you’ve made yourself clear about how you feel,” a voice speaks up, and you think it’s yours, until you realize it’s much too deep.

Taehyung’s aunt looks momentarily stunned to see her nephew standing in the doorway, his expression a mixture of shock and anger. But she quickly regains her composure. “Taehyung, I was just—”

“Please don’t,” he interrupts, voice firm. “If I had known you were going to be this cruel towards someone I deeply care about, then I’m sorry I invited you.”

He steps closer, his gaze unwavering. “You have no right to judge someone you don’t know based on rumors and assumptions.”

His aunt’s face softens, though her disapproval remains. “I’m only looking out for you. I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“I don’t need you to protect me from my own choices,” Taehyung replies, his voice calmer. “I’ve made my own decisions, and __ is a part of that. If you can’t respect that, then maybe you should reconsider how you approach these situations.”

Taehyung’s aunt stands silent for a moment, her gaze shifting between Taehyung and you. She seems to weigh his words before finally nodding and turning back towards the dining room, her displeasure still evident.

Taehyung turns to you, his face etched with worry. “Are you alright?”

You hesitate, unable to give a clear response. “I… I think I need some air,” you finally say.

“Maybe it’s time we take that walk down to the beach,” he suggests gently. “What do you think? Of course, if you’d prefer to go solo, that’s completely your call too. I’ll understand either way.”

You nod, appreciating the idea. “I’d like you to come with me.”

“Let me grab Tan and we can head down,” Taehyung says with a reassuring smile.

The sound of the waves grows louder as you approach the ocean, providing a soothing backdrop to your racing thoughts. It's even more beautiful up close, you think, observing how the sun reflects off the water.

As you walk along the shore, Tan runs ahead, chasing the waves and barking playfully. The sight of him brings a small smile to your face, easing some of the heaviness in your chest.

Taehyung walks beside you, his presence peaceful, though neither of you are quick to speak.

Finally, after a few minutes pass, he breaks the silence.

“I’m really sorry about what happened back there," he says quietly. "My aunt's always had more traditional perspectives, but I didn’t know how rigid they’d gotten. Regardless of how she might've made you feel, I want you to know that you’re very important to me and I couldn't care less about what the public says. The rest of my family seems to love you too so far."

You take a deep breath, the salty air filling your lungs. “It’s not your fault, Taehyung. But thank you.” You pause, your face visibly conflicted. “To be honest, I’ve heard variations of it before from other people. I just didn’t expect her to be so… direct.”

He nods, turning to you with sincerity. “I know it was hurtful, and even though I didn’t hear everything she said, you didn’t deserve it. It's not true, either.”

You manage a small, tight-lipped smile, but it hardly matches how you feel inside. “Well,” you begin, continuing your walk, “some of it's true, I think.” Taehyung looks at you with concern, though you struggle to hold his gaze.

“Wanna sit?” he suggests lightly, gesturing to a spot on the beach with a clear view of the waves ahead. "Tan'll be fine to roam around on his own."

You nod slowly in reply, a gentle breeze caressing your face and feathering against your legs as you move.

Once you reach the area, you tuck the skirt of your dress beneath your thighs and take a seat on the soft sand. Taehyung sits down beside you.

“So,” he starts again, his eyes never leaving your face, “what’s true?"

You take a moment, watching the waves crash against the shore before forming a response. “It’s just…” Your voice falters as you search for the right words. “I’m 30 years old. The natural course for someone my age is to have a family, a couple of kids, and of course, be married. Or at the very least, have a reliable romantic partner.”

“Instead,” you take a short breath, “it feels like I’m living in a completely different reality from everyone else. Divorced from a big shot CEO, without children, and painted as some kind of spinster or gold digger for the media to exploit. Being a woman, there's really no in-between which makes it that much harder to overcome."

Upon finishing your thought, an unmistakable nervousness bubbles up within you. Had you just overshared? Were you too honest? Although unsettled, everything in you hopes that you didn't just overstep your boundaries with Taehyung, as the two of you hadn't had this deep of a conversation before. You find yourself holding your breath as he replies.

"To have all that unnecessary pressure placed on you is unfair,” he says quietly. “I can’t imagine how tough it must be to feel disregarded and reduced to so little. I'm so sorry, __. I'm sorry that we gets so fixated on image and what’s deemed proper that we often forget the real meaning behind things. I know it might be hard to believe, but there’s more to your story than what others see or say. More than even you might think, too."

As if inevitable, your vision goes misty and a tear spills down your cheek upon hearing his words, though you're quick to wipe it away. It's not that the words themselves are monumental, but rather, they confirm the closeness of your relationship. Few people have ever understood or cared to understand you, so you had stopped expecting it altogether, especially after your divorce. Yet somehow, Taehyung always surprises you, being one of the few who truly does.

Feeling a bit more comfortable, you admit, "I know it's probably an overstatement, but I can't help but feel like I'm alone in ways that are hard to escape. Some days I just don't know what to do with it all. Does that make sense?"

“Sweetheart,” Taehyung says softly, taking the hand you used to wipe your tears and lacing his fingers with yours. The warmth of his touch sends a comforting spark through you. He’s never called you that before, and it feels unexpectedly intimate—almost domestic, if you didn’t know better.

“It makes complete sense, especially given what you've gone through and still are. You don’t ever have to feel alone anymore though,” he continues. “I’m here for you. You have Jimin and Namjoon too. And the three of us? We’ll always have your back.”

Your eyes soften as you meet his gaze. He’s looking at you with such warmth and innocence, yet he hasn’t fully grasped the weight of your words.

“I appreciate it,” you say gratefully. “It’s not all one-dimensional, though. When I say I feel alone, I mean relationally as well because, given my age and marital status, it's unlikely I'll find any real companionship. I’m just considered ‘used goods' after all.”

“Used goods? Who the hell said you're used?” Taehyung’s voice rises, not in anger but in genuine offense. Amid his reaction, his hand slips from yours.

“Our entire society?” you retort, raising your voice before lowering it again, realizing he means well. You pull your legs up to your chin and hug them. “I’m divorced, Tae. I’m no beauty queen. Just used goods, as I said.”

You both stare out into the distance, falling into a brief silence.

“Well, I for one think you’re very gorgeous,” he says softly, still gazing ahead. “So please, don’t call yourself used. You’re definitely not.”

“Tae—”

“Do you wish you were still married?” he interjects gently, eyes returning to yours, searching for the truth. He wants to add, To Jungkook? but keeps it to himself, not deeming it his business.

You take a moment to process his question before responding.

“Some days I do,” you admit. “Not just with anyone, though. I’ve already learned my lesson the hard way. Jimin tried setting me up with a few of his coworkers a while back, but I declined. They’re so far away that I doubt anything would work out. Plus, not to be harsh but who in their right mind would risk it with me anyway?”

“I mean...I would,” he replies almost immediately, insistence in his voice. There's no trace of bluff at all and for a moment, your heart feels like it's doing about a hundred somersaults in your chest. Taehyung's seriousness makes it seem like he means it in a deeper way, but it can't be—he’s merely speaking figuratively because of your closeness.

“Of course you would,” you reply, grabbing his hand again and smiling gratefully. “Because you love me, right?”

You pose the question playfully, feeling your mood lift slightly, but Taehyung’s expression turns stunned, like a deer caught in headlights.

“I do,” he finally murmurs, deep and meaningful, a soft glimmer in his eyes. “I really do.”

"Hu-" you choke on your words, still trying to process his. You never finish, though, as Taehyung suddenly moves to stand up, a newfound cheekiness taking precedence over his face.

“Come on,” he says, “on a warm day like this, we should find a way to enjoy ourselves. Dance with me.”

“What?” you ask, though to be honest, you're not surprised by his spontaneity. “Dancing is a no, Tae. You know I have zero rhythm.”

He doesn’t reply to your argument but instead draws his phone from his pocket, tapping around until light jazz music starts playing. He turns up the volume as loud as he can before placing it on the ground beside you.

“What are you doing?” you watch as he begins swaying his body from side to side, snapping his fingers when the beat feels right.

“I’m dancing by myself since you refuse to get up.”

You laugh, “I happen to like it this way. You can be my source of entertainment.” You adjust yourself so your legs are stretched out in front of you, feet crossed as you lean back on your arms.

He chuckles and continues dancing in small circles. You feel a little guilty the longer you watch. But then...

“__,” he calls your name, low and raspy. He steps over towards you and leans down until he's face to face with you. You like the way the sun glows down on his face, and the thought crosses your mind—he looks incredibly handsome. “__,” he calls your name again, and you realize you've been staring a little too long.

“Sorry,” you reply. “Sun’s making me dazed.”

He gives his usual boxy smile, and damn, why are you feeling so affected by him today? It’s not usually this much.

“Will you please dance with me? I don’t mind dancing by myself, but I prefer a partner.” He pouts and you know you’re done for.

“I’m not going to be good though,” you reply, reluctantly rising from your comfortable seated position. Taehyung pulls you into his hold the moment you’re on your feet. It's a little rougher than he meant, and your bodies accidentally collide in the process.

“Shit, my bad,” he says, taking a small step back.

“It’s fine," you assure, doing the same but not before catching a whiff of his cologne. You can't quite place the scent, but it’s nice...really, really nice.

As the music continues to play, you both sway gently to the rhythm. Taehyung’s touch is warm and steady as he guides you through each simple step. You feel a strange sense of comfort and safety in his arms, and for a moment, it feels like the rest of the world fades away.

“I didn’t realize you were such a good dancer,” you start. “You’ve been keeping secrets from me.”

He spins you gently, and you let out a surprised laugh, the sound mingling with the soft notes of the jazz music. “I had to take ballroom dancing lessons for a role I played years ago,” he replies smoothly, “but I enjoyed it, so I kept it up.” When you come back to him, he holds you a little tighter, and the closeness feels more intimate and special than you anticipated.

“You’re doing great, by the way,” he whispers, his breath warm against your ear. "Even with barely any practice."

“All thanks to you,” you reply, a shy smile tugging at your lips. “I guess it’s kinda fun.”

“See? Not so bad,” he says with a triumphant grin.

You glance towards the ocean, feeling a rush of spontaneity yourself. “The water looks so inviting. We should go in.”

He quirks a brow, taking in both of your more formal attire. “Dressed like this?” he asks.

You don’t answer. Instead, you slide out of his hold and run towards the water, laughing and splashing him once he’s close enough behind you.

“Hey! This was expensive!” he shouts, but there's no threat in his voice, only amusement.

“Well, you shouldn’t have worn it around me then!” you tease, splashing him again.

Now nearly drenched, Taehyung huffs and bends down to scoop water into his palm. “You’re gonna get it…” You back away quickly, but he follows after you. “Come here, I have a very special gift for you __,” he says mischievously, water spilling from his hand as he chases you.

You both end up playing in the water for the next ten minutes, splashing and laughing until you find yourself regaining confidence. At some point, Taehyung unexpectedly tackles you from behind, his arms wrapping so tightly around your waist that no amount of movement would free you.

You find yourselves too lost in amusement to notice your closeness until small droplets of water begin falling from above.

"Was that rain?" You stop all movement, but his grip doesn’t loosen. "Tae?" You call his name when it seems he doesn’t register your question, twisting your head over your shoulder to peer at him.

“Oh…um, sorry,” he finally stammers, a faint blush rising to his cheeks as he realizes the tight hold he has on you. His body flushes against your back.

“No, it’s okay…” you struggle to conceal a blush of your own, the warmth of his embrace a little overpowering. "So, I think we should head back. I'm pretty sure it's raining."

He nods and slowly unwraps his arms from around you. "I agree, but where's Tan?" His eyes frantically scan around the beach. "Tan!" he calls, and soon, two fluffy, slightly damp ears pop out from behind a rock.

"Aww," you exclaim, bending down to pick up the little dog when he trots over. "Look at him. We neglected the baby."

Taehyung snorts at your remark. "He'll be okay. It barely started."

You pretend to cover Tan's ears and shoot Taehyung a faux alarmed expression. "He can hear you, you know."

Taehyung chuckles and gently cups Tan’s face while he nestles in your arms, planting a soft kiss on the top of his head. “Sorry, buddy,” he says with a grin. As he looks up, he catches a prolonged gaze in your eyes and raises an eyebrow. “What? You want one too?”

“Oh, uhm, no,” you laugh, a bit nervously, shaking your head. “It’s just nice to see you so endearing.” You think back to how Taehyung had interacted so sweetly with his younger cousin, Eun-ha, earlier. It’s a side of him you're finding increasingly appealing.

Taehyung's gaze softens as he replies, “I like to take care of those I love.”

Love, you repeat quietly to yourself. It sounds so different when he says it.

You smile and, side by side, head back to the house.

The faint drizzle of rain quickly turns into a downpour, with a flash of lightning illuminating the sky and thunder rumbling in the distance. Despite the potential inconvenience, Taehyung’s parents insist that it would be better for both of you to wait until morning to drive back.

"It isn't safe," his mom advises, fluffing a pillow in the guest bedroom. "The two of you can stay here for the night. I’d offer the living room sofa too, but some of your cousins are staying over as well."

"Thanks, Mom," Taehyung replies, and when she leaves the room he casts a brief glance your way. “I’ll sleep on the floor.”

“What? No, you can sleep in the bed with Tan." You pause, eyes scanning the room for an alternative spot. “This chair looks pretty comfortable. I’ll grab a blanket and make do.”

"Okay no, I’m not letting you sleep on that old, dusty chair and risk waking up with a giant kink in your neck.” Taehyung places his hands on his hips, his tone firm. “Why don’t we just sleep in the bed together? For some inexplicable reason, my parents chose to put a California King in here so there should be plenty of room. I’ll even sleep on top of the covers.”

“No, it's fine. Tan needs his space."

“Sweetheart." There it is again, that same petname from earlier. Why do you not seem to hate it? "Tan is so tiny he’ll literally curl between us," he argues, though it does little to convince you.

“Tae, I told you it’s—”

“Alright, I’ll take the chair then-” Taehyung starts to move toward it, but stubbornly, you block his path. There's no way he's sleeping on a chair when you're the guest here.

“You will do no such thing!" Naturally, you place your hands on your hips. “This is your home—well, your parent's home and I won't be subjecting you to sleep on something that small. Seriously Tae, I'd fit much better on it than you would given our height differences.”

A small, frustrated sigh escapes him as he counters, “I'd really rather you be comfortable, especially in an unfamiliar environment. So can we please stop arguing about this? It’s really unnecessary. Either I take the chair or we both find a way to share the bed. You can’t tell me you and Jimin never shared a bed before, and he’s your friend too!"

“Yes, but that’s different,” you insist. “Jimin and I have been friends for years! There’s a strong trust built between us.”

“What do you mean by that? You don’t trust me?” His face mirrors that of a sad, puppy-dog.

“Tae, it’s not that at all,” you say softly, trying to sound reassuring. “I do trust you. It’s just… I guess I just meant that Jimin and I have a long history together. We’ve grown very comfortable with each other in ways you and I haven’t yet.”

Taehyung’s brows furrow in concern. “What are you really worried about, __?”

You shrug, feeling a bit flustered. “Nothing…”

Your mind immediately drifts back to the beach—how he listened, held your hand gently, the way his eyes crinkled when he laughed, and what it felt like to be held so close under the rain. Everything felt so genuine, warm, and openly vulnerable.

You share similar feelings with Jimin, but they have limits as you are definitely only friends… best friends, to be precise. With Taehyung, you figured it would be the same; however, after today, you're realizing more and more how unsure you are of where the limits are (or where you want them to be), and it startles you.

But it’s not this alone that fuels your apprehension tonight— there’s something else.

“You know I won’t do anything right?” Taehyung asks, his voice earnest. “I sleep with five pillows!”

You raise an eyebrow, a faint smile tugging at your lips despite yourself. “Five? What the hell, Tae? Are you a princess?”

“Yes,” Taehyung says, more nonchalantly than expected, “but stop deflecting. It sounds weird and a bit kinky, but why won’t you sleep in the bed with me?”

Should you tell him?

Your expression grows serious as you explain, “Because it can be very intimate,” you murmur softly. “Maybe I'm overthinking it all, but the last time I shared a bed with someone it...uhm...it was…”

“...with your ex-husband,” Taehyung finishes for you, his tone gentle with understanding. His eyes soften as he looks at you.

“Yes…” you admit, your voice barely above a whisper. “It’s silly, but I haven’t done it in a long time. Even Jimin and I haven’t shared a bed in years.”

“I’m sorry…” Taehyung says, his voice filled with genuine regret.

“Tae, you don’t have to be sorry,” you say, shaking your head. “It’s my own issue. I’ll just sleep on the chair, alright? It’s only one night.”

“Not happening, you’ll take the bed with Tan.”

“Seriously,” you start to protest, but he’s already moving toward the foot of the bed with determination in his eyes. He grabs the blanket from the end and rushes over to the chair with haste. You run after him, pulling at his arm, and both of you end up laughing, the tension gradually breaking.

“It's been a very long day and I'm quite tired, __. How about turning off the lights, please?” He spreads out the blanket and settles into the chair with a satisfied sigh. Then, there’s a loud creak followed by a distinct cracking sound.

“Fuck—” Taehyung swears as the chair suddenly collapses under his weight. He rises from his seat, grimacing at the broken chair. “I knew it was old, but damn, I didn’t think it was that old.”

“Shit, please tell me this wasn't a family heirloom or something.”

“Uh… I don’t think so?” Taehyung scratches his head, looking sheepish. “I’ll let my mom know in the morning. It’ll be fine, okay? No worries. But, um, I’ll sleep on the floor instead.” Taehyung then grabs a couple pillows and a blanket and starts forming a makeshift bed on the floor. While you watch him, your heart softens despite your exhaustion.

“Alright, enough,” you sigh, exasperated. “If we keep this up, we’ll just be going in circles all night. Let’s just share the bed, Tae. It’s not worth you being uncomfortable.”

Taehyung looks up, concern written over his face. “Are you sure? I don’t want you feeling uncomfortable either. I’m happy to—”

“I’m sure,” you cut him off, doing your best not to overthink it. “You're the one who'll be driving for five hours tomorrow anyway, so let’s just get some decent rest. It's okay, really.”

After a good long pause, you both end up climbing into the bed, each taking your own side as Tan curls himself at the foot of the bed. Taehyung reaches over to turn off the light, but despite the calmness of the room, you find yourself unable to sleep right away. You’re unaware he feels similarly until he unexpectedly breaks the silence.

“Are you warm enough?” he asks quietly. “We have more blankets if you need them.”

You turn slightly toward him. “I’m okay for now, but thanks for checking.”

He gives a soft, reassuring smile. “Alright. Just let me know if you need anything. Sleep well.”

“Thanks, Tae.” You roll back onto your side and close your eyes. “You too.”

As the night deepens, the storm outside continues its relentless drumming against the windows. At some point, Taehyung jolts awake to a faint but unmistakable sound.

He blinks groggily at first, adjusting to the dim light filtering through the curtains. Then he notices your restless movements and hears you murmuring softly in your sleep, a note of distress in your voice.

"__?" he asks quietly, still half-asleep. "Are you okay?"

When you don’t respond, he shifts closer, concerned by the unease on your face. Seeing your share of the blankets has slipped off, he gently tugs them back over you, making sure they cover you comfortably.

Amid the movement, a muddled groan escapes your lips—something between a whimper and a sigh, "Mmm… no…"

It doesn't take a genius to figure out you must be having a nightmare of some sort. “It’s just a dream,” he whispers soothingly, brushing a stray hair from your face. “You’re safe here with me.”

He gently takes your slightly trembling hand and holds it gently in his. “I’m right here, __,” he sighs softly. “No matter what happens, I’ll always be here.”

Taehyung isn’t sure how much time passes before your restlessness stops, but he stays awake, hand clutching yours until it does. Eventually, assuming you’ve finally entered a more peaceful sleep, he releases your hand and rolls onto his side.

What he doesn't expect is for you to unconsciously follow him over, your body snuggling against his back. The warmth of your body against his is comforting, but he knows he can't let you stay there and risk any awkwardness in the morning. So with the utmost care, he rolls over to face you and gently adjusts your body until you're lying comfortably on your back again.

"I hope you'll be able to sleep better now," he whispers, his voice barely audible above the storm. "Goodnight."

Following the reunion, you and Taehyung part ways with mutual thank-yous and promises to see each other soon.

Time seems to vanish afterward as you find yourself increasingly buried under an endless pile of work projects. Apparently, over the weekend, a notable investor reached out to your company with hopes of setting up a meeting.

Namjoon is nearly tripping over his words when he relays the message to you.

"Can you believe it?" Your secretary stands within a foot from your desk, excitement evident in his voice. "They want to meet with us! This could be huge for our company."

You share his enthusiasm but your need to remain holistic in the matter tempers your ability to feel overly zealous. Meetings with investors always carry significant opportunities; however, there's no guarantee a deal will be struck. Truthfully, it depends on a number of factors, their level of interest outweighing them all.

Plus, every meeting requires extensive preparation—late nights where you tirelessly hunch over your computer, perfecting every detail of the pitch and this one promises to be no different.

"Did they happen to mention a time or date for further discussion?" you ask, matter-of-factly. Namjoon nods, pulling out his phone.

"Yes, they suggested next Wednesday at 10 AM.”

You weigh the proposal in your mind. “That should give us enough time to get everything in order, then,” you conclude. “Please put it in our calendar and let them know we’ll be ready to meet on that day.”

From then on, the remainder of your week unfolds exactly as you anticipate—relentless preparation, long nights, and meticulous planning until the small of your back aches for relief. One might say it's an exaggeration, but the only breaks you can afford are for primal necessities like eating, sleeping, and using the bathroom.

Even your weekend is spent within the walls of your home office, a far cry from previous weekends when you used to visit the book café or meet up with Taehyung.

Speaking of which, you haven’t really gotten to see each other since his family gathering and though it was only a week ago, the lack of his presence leaves you feeling a bit disheartened. He replied to your text yesterday, but even so, it was brief—something about a new project or talk show interview was keeping him busy as well.

By the time Wednesday arrives, your neck is so riddled with the stress of the upcoming investor meeting that you can barely focus on your proposal notes. Everything in you hopes that the investors will be impressed enough to partner with you, but thinking about it does nothing except heighten your nervousness.

In search of some kind of solace, your mind wanders to Taehyung instead. The memory of the small dance you shared with him on the beach is once again vivid, as if it happened just moments ago—the soft sand beneath your feet, the sound of the waves, and the way his gentle hands gripped around your waist.

But why does this memory, out of all the possibilities, feel so soothing?

You've been struggling to come to a plausible conclusion since the day it happened, yet deep down, you know it’s not as trivial as it seems. You miss it, your subconscious hums, you miss him.

Just then, Namjoon pokes his head into your office, signaling that the investors have arrived in the conference room. You send a curt nod in reply and gather your notes, refocusing your mind on the task at hand; everything else will have to wait.

Turns out, you might have been a bit too pessimistic about the investor meeting. They’re surprisingly pleased with your plans and proposals, nodding along to each of your points. However, their request for a day or two to reach a final decision catches you a tad off guard.

Rather than grapple with the uncertainty though, you decide to mentally prepare for whatever comes next... starting by decompressing at the bar downtown, a glass of their strongest alcohol in hand.

At first, finding a seat proves to be a challenge as you navigate through a sea of sweaty bodies. But luck, seemingly on your side, provides you with an empty chair at the far end of the bar. While you sit and order your drink, you can't help but wonder what Taehyung might be doing tonight. Should you text him to see if he’d join you, even if only for fifteen minutes?

Slipping your phone from the side pocket of your bag, you curse silently at your apparent haste. Your subconscious was right—you really have missed him, damn.

All at once, your thoughts are put to an abrupt stop when you take a quick glance around the bar, your gaze unprepared to land on two familiar silhouettes at the opposite end—Namjoon, with Taehyung next to him, drinks in hand. You don’t know how you failed to notice them before. They’re laughing, clearly enjoying each other’s company, and for a moment, your face lifts into a smile.

But that smile quickly fades when you catch sight of two women sauntering over to join them. Your initial joy is swiftly replaced by a sharp sting of jealousy and you chastise yourself for the feeling. Who are you to react this way? Taehyung can do whatever he wants—why should you care who he’s out with?

Forcing yourself to shake off the feeling, you take a sip of your drink, but your gaze keeps drifting back to the group. It’s obvious that the taller of the two women, arguably as stunning as Taehyung, is laser-focused on him, her hand brushing his arm lightly as she laughs at whatever joke he’s just told. Probably a dumb one, you think bitterly; it's obvious she's not just there for the humor and booze. It's strange to witness, as you've only known Taehyung to allow a few, select women to touch him so openly—his mother, his onscreen cast members, and you.

Okay __, stop, you scold yourself. This is a bad idea; you’re getting too involved for your own good. Hastily, you finish your drink and head out of the bar, the cool night air brushing against your skin. If Taehyung goes home with her, it’s none of your business.

You're barely a few feet outside the bar's door when you hear commotion echo from a nearby alley. Alarmed, you whip towards the noise, your eyes widening in disbelief. There, in the dim light, you see your ex-husband doubled over, clutching his stomach, while a shadowy figure stands in front of him, fist clenched.

You’re not sure where the courage comes from, but within seconds, you're springing to action, racing towards the scene with a surge of adrenaline. “Hey!” you shout as loudly as you can. The attacker glances back, frazzled, then bolts into the night, leaving Jungkook hunched against the alley wall.

“Oh my god, are you okay?” you ask frantically, rushing to his side and helping him to his feet. He flinches away from your touch initially, his face a mix of panic and agony. “It’s me, Jungkook. It's __. Can you hear me? It’s okay, I’m here,” you reassure him the best you can, hoping to ease him.

Jungkook takes a few shaky breaths, body still weak as he struggles to hold himself up against the wall. His eyes are glazed, and he seems disoriented. “I… I didn’t expect you,” he mutters, his voice strained.

Offering him an arm, you help him steady himself. “Let’s get you out of here, okay?” He nods weakly, and as you guide him towards the parking lot and into the light, you ask, "What happened back there? Do you need me to take you to the hospital?"

Jungkook sighs, wincing slightly. “No, it’s... I’m fine. He was just a kid—no more than 21. Angry, probably a little drunk, and accused me of being the reason his father got fired. At first, I was confused, but then I vaguely recognized him as being one of our employee’s sons. Pretty sure it was my dad who fired his—I was probably just an easier target."

You both fall into a contemplative silence as you continue walking. Of course Jungkook's father, the chairman of the company, would be behind this, you think. Previous times spent with him had shown you how ruthless he could be when it came to the "well-being" of his company. Whoever the kid was, he probably had a right to be angry, but physically taking it out on Jungkook wasn’t justifiable by any means.

“You sure you don’t need a doctor?” you ask, glancing at him with concern.

He shakes his head dismissively, "Don't worry about me," he replies. "A couple of punches to the gut won't kill me. I think it's about time I head home though."

You nod in agreement. “Where did you park?”

He points to a spot on the far left side of the parking lot, and you nearly groan at the sight. “Did you have to bring your bike tonight?” you ask, a hint of exasperation in your voice.

Jungkook gives a weak smile, understanding the inconvenience of the situation. “Thought I’d ride it in case I needed to get somewhere fast,” he replies, his voice strained but with a touch of humor.

"Come on," you say, walking him toward your car instead. "We might not be married anymore, but there’s no way in hell I'm letting you ride your bike home in this condition. You can pick it up tomorrow."

Jungkook chuckles weakly. “Damn, and to think we were about to ride it together for old times’ sake. You used to be pretty good with my motorcycle back when you were my girlfriend, __." You roll your eyes, patience thinning. If this is another one of his sexual advances, you’re long over it.

"Yeah, well, that was before Taehyung’s accident scared me half to death," you retort. "And for the record, I was never your girlfriend. We went from work partners straight to I do." You open the passenger door and help him into the seat, giving him a gentle shove. "Now sit tight and no more motorcycle talk."

Jungkook leans back and raises an eyebrow with a playful smirk. “Well, what are we gonna talk about then? It’s a twenty-minute drive to my place.”

You slide into the driver’s seat and start the engine, giving him the go-ahead to enter his address into your car’s GPS. “Are you really whining already?”

As Jungkook taps away on the GPS, you’re suddenly reminded of a series of past car trips you shared with him. It’s almost like déjà vu.

“Seriously, __,” he starts, allowing his playful demeanor to fade. “Thank you for doing this for me. I know we… well, we aren’t exactly on the best terms.”

From the corner of your eye, you observe the way he aimlessly stares out the window, unsure whether to meet your gaze.

"We may not be in the best place, but that doesn’t mean I’d just leave you there," you sigh, gripping the steering wheel tighter. A long pause follows afterward until the question that's been gnawing at you finally slips from your lips. "How's everything with the company?"

Seemingly unfazed, as if he’d been anticipating the question, Jungkook replies, “I’m guessing you’ve heard the rumors.”

“Hard not to,” you say, keeping your eyes on the road.

He takes a deep breath before continuing, "Well, it's um... it's a sabbatical. I know it's probably a shock, right? My father isn’t too thrilled about it, so he’s delayed the official announcement until we reach a final consensus. But things have been... complicated. Our newest product launched recently, and it’s doing well, but now I think I need some time for myself. To take a step back.”

Well, shit.

Even with all the rumors, you never would have guessed in a million years that the truth of the matter was an impending sabbatical. Jungkook has always been the type to work himself until his hands bleed, so this is the last reason you expected to hear.

“I’m glad to hear you’re finally letting yourself have a break, but honestly, it doesn’t sound like you at all. Feel free not to share, but what do you mean by ‘complicated’?” The way he frames it sounds almost ominous.

“You really want to know?” He finally glances at you for the first time since getting into the car, his eyes carrying a hint of vulnerability.

“Only if you want to share,” you reply cautiously.

He looks down at his hands, gathering his thoughts. “So, remember when we last saw each other a few months back? Well, I’ve been reflecting a lot on our relationship since then. I know I wasn’t fair to you, __, and I really wish I could take it all back. You never deserved any of it. I was incredibly selfish and I’m truly sorry.”

You remain silent, thrown off by how quickly everything circles back to your fragile past together. Still, you allow him to speak.

"Before we parted ways, you suggested I see a professional, and… I thought I'd finally take your advice for once. It’s strange because I’d never gone before, but…”

He pauses, searching for the right words. “I’m starting to understand a lot about myself—why I react the way I do and how I handle things. It’s been tough, but I’m trying. I guess I’m taking this sabbatical because I need to figure myself out, away from work, so I can be better and stop hurting people around me."

For the first time in a long time, as you listen to your ex-husband, you realize he's beginning to sound genuinely mature. If it's true that he's been seeing a therapist and taking a sabbatical to prioritize his well-being, then you're extremely proud of him.

Yet, a small part of you remains stubborn, wishing he had made these changes earlier—imagine where you might be now if he had.

“Thank you for being open enough to share this with me," you respond slowly, careful not to misspeak. "Though I’m still a little surprised, I have to say I’m really proud of you for seeking help. I’ve been seeing someone as well, and it took me some time to settle in too, but I suppose that’s part of the healing process—being uncomfortable to an extent. We’ve had our share of challenges with one another, but despite everything, I’ll always wish the best for you, Jungkook—including your health and mental well-being.”

As you pull into the driveway of his house, parking the car near the front door, Jungkook takes a deep breath and turns to you, visibly affected. "It means a lot that you'd say that, __," he starts hesitantly, hands fidgeting in his lap. "I know I've made a lot of mistakes, and I understand if you can't forgive me completely. But I want you to know that I am sorry. I wasn’t fair to you and I'm not proud of my behavior at all."

You nod in response, a small, tight-lipped smile forming. His remorse for the past is finally sincere, yet even now, as he looks at you with those hopeful eyes—the same ones you carried for months on end—you know he's searching for more than just your forgiveness.

But this time, you don’t think you can offer him more than that.

Because while you grew fond of him during your marriage, you've come to realize how unearned and misplaced that affection was. He broke your heart not once, but twice. And although you can never hate him, deep down, you can't ignore the lingering sting you feel when you're around him.

It's both sobering and eye-opening.

So, rather than reversing into old emotions, you simply say, "I believe you, Jungkook, and I think with time I'll be able to forgive you. If there’s ever a time when you’re in dire need of help, like tonight, I’ll do my best to be there. I’m afraid that’s as far as we can go, though."

It’s written all over his face that it’s not what he was hoping to hear, but respectfully, he doesn’t press further.

"I understand," he says, fingers reaching to for the passenger door handle. "Thank you again for being there for me tonight, and for driving me home. Please feel free to reach out if you ever need me as well. I hope for the best for you too, however and with whoever you choose."

The two of you exchange a brief look of gratitude before he finally pulls the door open and steps out of the car, making his way to his front door.

"Have a good night, and rest up," you call out to him. He smiles, gives a wave, and heads inside.

As you slowly back out of the driveway, you sigh, leaving only one person ruminating in your mind: Taehyung.

Then, inevitably, images of the stunning woman at the bar with him intrude your thoughts, stirring a deep, unsettling emotion within you.

Does it really matter that much who he's out with?

Are you really that jealous about it?

Mentally, you go back and forth as if plucking petals from a large sunflower… Yes. No. Yes. No. Until—Silence.

You can't seem to give a straight answer. It's like the closer you and Taehyung grow, the more undefinable and knotted your feelings become. Yet, the further apart you are, the more unnatural it feels...

Well, your indecisiveness doesn’t get any better by Friday because, finally, after what feels like an eternity, you and Taehyung have plans.

You’re heading out for dinner at a restaurant of his choosing tonight, as he insisted you go somewhere new. Where could it be? You have no clue, and while surprises aren’t usually your thing, his enthusiasm when you confirmed plans earlier has left you intrigued. There’s also this faint, inexplicably giddy feeling in your stomach that won’t go away, coinciding with a slight nervousness.

With such a seemingly important occasion, you find yourself in front of your bedroom mirror, twisting from side to side in what’s probably the fifth outfit you’ve tried on. But nothing seems to fit quite right. You’re feeling especially frustrated to be frank, as something that usually takes you twenty minutes is turning into a whole hour.

You end up tossing one final dress over your head—a bit more elegant for the occasion, but it’s one of the few items you own that accentuates your body down to the last detail. The dress hugs around your waist and falls just above your knees, its rich color perfectly complementing your skin tone. But isn’t it a little revealing? The neckline dips down further than you remember.

Crap—the alarm on your phone suddenly chimes, reminding you that Taehyung's arriving in ten minutes. You're running out of time.

"You’re being ridiculous. It’ll be fine,” you reassure yourself, smoothing down the skirt of the dress. “You're just friends. He won’t care.”

“Friends” stings more than you anticipated, leaving a bitter aftertaste and a deflated feeling in your chest.

Nevertheless, you give yourself one last look in the mirror, apply a quick swipe of lipstick, and head downstairs. Just as you finish slipping on your shoes and grabbing your purse from the coat rack, the doorbell rings, causing your heart to leap from your chest.

Deciding to rip it off like a band-aid, you toss open the door, and there he is—standing on your doorstep with his signature boxy grin and gently tousled raven hair. Taehyung's dressed in a tailored blazer and matching slacks over a crisp white t-shirt, and you find yourself at a complete loss for words as if you’ve forgotten what it’s like to be around him.

Maybe it’s something in the air, but he appears equally stunned, looking you up and down with wide eyes. His gaze soon softens into admiration as he takes in your entire appearance. “Wow,” he chokes, clearly impressed. “You look amazing.”

You feel a rush of warmth at his compliment and muster all your strength to keep from looking away flustered. “Thank you,” your voice wavers slightly. “You look pretty great yourself.”

Tongue in cheek, he replies with a playful smirk, “I was hoping you’d say that,” which prompts you to lightly punch him in the arm.

“Don't be arrogant.”

He chuckles, rubbing his arm with a grin. “Shall we head out?”

You nod and step outside, locking the door behind you.

The drive to the restaurant is a brief one, and you're immediately struck by the charm of its exterior when you arrive—stone walls, covered with vines of ivy and warm glowing lanterns. Inside is even more beautiful, with wooden shelves lined with old books and bottles of fine wine wrapping around the room. You're starting to understand why Taehyung was so insistent on bringing you here; the place perfectly reflects his taste and, unexpectedly, yours as well.

One of the hosts leads you to a deep mahogany table after confirming your reservation. The closer you get to it, the more you notice the crisp white linens and small tealight candles that sit on top, setting a romantic scene. If you had to describe the feeling, it would be as though you’ve been transported straight to a quaint corner of France.

"So, what do you think?” Seated across from you, Taehyung looks at you with bated breath. His fingers fidget with the edge of the table, nervously anticipating your verdict.

“Honestly? It’s so charming,” you reply, glancing around in awe. “I didn’t even realize we had a place like this around.”

At this, his demeanor relaxes, and a pleased smile spreads across his face. “It’s a bit hidden, but once I found it, it quickly became one of my favorite spots.” He pauses, then adds, “This is actually the same restaurant I wanted to take you to months ago, before my accident.”

“What? You’re serious?” you blink in shock as the realization slowly sinks in. You take another look around the restaurant—the rows of books, the bottles of wine, the elegant dining atmosphere—and suddenly, it all makes sense. How did you miss it before? “I’m sorry we didn’t come sooner,” you say softly, regretful of having turned down his offer before.

“It’s okay,” Taehyung's quick to reassure you, reaching out to lightly touch your hand. “What matters is that we’re here now. And honestly, I’m just happy to finally share it with you.” He gives you a warm smile, and immediately, you feel a small lump form in the back of your throat.

“Thank you for bringing us here tonight,” you say, “It’s wonderful, and I’m really glad we could make it up.”

“Of course,” he replies, “I thought it was a place we’d both enjoy.”

Everything about his responses seems to carry a heightened level of endearment and attentiveness, as if there’s more hidden beneath them.

Perhaps selfishly, you also sense there’s something uniquely special about this night—something you believe only exists between the two of you. So, when Taehyung retracts his hand, you feel a fleeting instinct to reach out and grasp it again, but you stop yourself short.

What are you thinking? This isn’t a date.

Needing a distraction, you grab the menu and start scanning the options.

Taehyung sees the way your gaze drifts and tilts his head, a concerned expression on his face. “Everything alright?” he asks gently.

You nod, forcing a smile. “Yeah,” you reply, trying to sound casual. “I'm just getting pretty hungry with all the food I smell.”

He chuckles, "Same here," then picks up a menu of his own.

The two of you sit in silence for the next few minutes, fixated on the food and wine list. You find yourself stealing glances at him from time to time, and unbeknownst to you, he does the same.

After the waiter takes your orders, Taehyung leans forward, resting his chin on his palm. “How’s everything at work been? I’ve been meaning to ask.”

Your face lights up at this. “Highs and lows," you reply, voice brightening, "but we got some exciting news today. I met with a potential investor earlier this week, and they’ve agreed to partner with the company. It’s a big win for us!”

Sharing your enthusiasm, Taehyung raises his wine glass, implicating you to follow suit. “This calls for a toast,” he says. “I know it must have meant long nights for you, but I’m so glad they recognized the value of you and your work. Seriously, __, you should be incredibly proud of this!"

You clink your glass with his, a light chuckle escaping you. There's something uniquely satisfying about sharing even the smallest things with him.

The conversation flows more comfortably from there, with Taehyung eagerly asking about the details of your new partnership. You reciprocate by asking about his current work projects, and soon, you both get lost in discussion, naturally causing your conversation to grow increasingly spontaneous. By the time your food arrives, the two of you must have easily covered fifty topics.

With the evening gradually becoming one of the most enjoyable you’ve had, the initial butterflies you felt at the start almost fade away... almost. That is, until you near the end of the meal and Taehyung looks at you with a seriousness in his eyes.

“I’m really glad we could do this tonight," he says, "We’ve both been so caught up with work lately that we haven’t had much time to spend together… I’ve missed it."

"Missed..." The simple six-letter word echoes in the back of your mind in a hushed murmur. It feels nice knowing you aren’t the only one affected by the recent distance.

“Me too,” you reply, more breathy than intended. Before you can fully process your words, you find yourself adding, “I’ve missed you a lot myself.”

A flush of embarrassment twists in your stomach the moment the words leave your mouth. You shouldn’t have said it like that—it almost sounded like… pining? God, you can’t even blame it on the alcohol at this point; you barely had one full glass of wine. Contrary to what you'd expect, Taehyung looks at you with a hint of shyness.

“You know,” he begins, briefly eyeing your dress, “you really do look great tonight. I’ve been a bit worried these past couple of weeks, seeing how much you work and how little sleep you get. But now… I'm relieved to see you looking so well.”

You blush. If only he saw you before tonight—greasy hair, bloodshot eyes, and oversized sweats on, you think. Evidently, tonight was an exception.

"I guess I've been worried about you too if I’m being honest,” you admit, shifting slightly in your seat. "The last time we saw each other was at your family reunion. It feels like it was ages ago for some odd reason."

“I know what you mean,” he says softly, gaze lingering on yours a moment longer than usual. “It’s strange going so long without seeing each other. It feels…unnatural.”

All at once, you pause, unsure if you heard right. Did Taehyung really say "unnatural"? It’s exactly how you’ve felt about the distance this entire time, but you hadn’t expected him to feel the same. Your mind struggles to process the sheer coincidence and its possible implications—was there something more to your relationship than you had realized?

While you try to make sense of it all, Taehyung’s raspy voice pulls you back to the present. “Well, uh, we should probably head out,” he suggests lightly, breaking the silence. You nod in agreement, though it does little to deter you from your thoughts.

You find yourself fidgeting with the hem of your dress the entire drive back, occasionally glancing at Taehyung in silence. His hands grip the steering wheel tightly, eyes focused on the road, yet you could’ve sworn his mouth parted at one point as if he was about to say something. But then, he held back. You wonder what he might’ve wanted to say, but you’re no better—hesitant to breathe a word yourself.

Why are neither of you speaking all of a sudden? It feels tense and unfamiliar.

In what feels like a blink of an eye, you're standing at your front door again, Taehyung close beside you. The space between you feels smaller this time, with unspoken words still lingering, but it’s clear that despite having your keys in hand, neither of you are ready to part ways just yet.

“__?” He speaks first, voice barely above a whisper.

“Yes?” You respond, turning to face him fully.

Taehyung takes a deep breath when you do, his usual warmth replaced by a heavy, unreadable expression. “There- there's something that’s been on my mind,” he begins, voice trembling slightly. “I've been going back and forth tonight on whether or not to tell you."

“Okay, what is it?” you ask, pulse quickening.

“It’s about us..." He hesitates, gnawing on his bottom lip slightly before continuing. "Earlier tonight, when I said I've missed being able to see you, I wasn’t lying. If anything, it was likely an understatement because, no matter how busy I was, I kept thinking about you—our time at my parents' place, and how you always came to visit me when I was in the hospital."

He pauses, his fist clenching nervously.

"I’ve realized since then that maybe the reason why is because somehow…you've always been more than a friend to me,” he confesses softly.

Searching your face for a reaction, Taehyung mistakes your blank expression for discomfort. Little does he know, however, that your stillness is merely due to shock, as every nerve in your body threatens to awaken. It feels surreal, you think. Sure, you had a small inkling that tonight felt different and Taehyung was sweeter than usual, but eighty percent of you chalked it up as nothing more than overthinking or projection.

Now, you realize how short-sighted you’ve been, convincing yourself that you could only ever be friends and denying the rest when it's been quite the opposite.

“I’m sorry," he adds sheepishly. "It must be a lot to take in. I don’t want to lose you or our friendship, but with my feelings growing, I think I’ll always want more. I thought it would be better for you to know.”

You see the sincerity in his eyes as he speaks, and though he patiently waits for your response, you’re unsure where to start. It’s not that you question Taehyung’s genuineness or intentions, or that you don’t reciprocate his feelings—you haven’t shared such a deep connection with someone in a long time, if ever.

Rather, it’s the years of a mostly apathetic marriage that leave you feeling wary.

What would a relationship with Taehyung be like?

Would you truly love each other?

For how long?

What startles you most is the possibility that if you and Taehyung really do this and it doesn’t work out, you’ll be left even more devastated than before.

When you finally speak, your voice wavers slightly. “To tell you the truth, a big part of me is relieved that you told me all of this,” you admit slowly, your hands clammy. “I thought I sensed a shift between us at your parents' and again this evening. But I also thought I was reading too much into things, convinced it was just us getting closer as friends do."

"I guess what I’m trying to say is that I was wrong because I've been wanting more with you too," you continue. "It's like the further away we are, the worse I seem to feel, and I can't help but wonder what it would look like if we were more than friends. The thought scares me as much as it excites me, though…for reasons I'm sure you already know."

You're uneasy about how he'll react until, all at once, his eyes fill with warmth and his hands gently reach for yours, thumbs rubbing soothing circles on the backs.

“Do you remember when we were at the beach and you asked who’d risk it for you?” Taehyung asks. You nod, recalling the exact moment. “You also asked if I loved you, and I agreed to both that day. I didn’t realize how much those words would come full circle, but I meant it then, and I mean it now. I will love you, __, in the way you've always meant to be. I'm pretty sure I'm at least halfway in love with you already, and not just because we're friends."

Wordless, you stand facing each other, your hands still held in his, eyes steady in the brisk night air. His gaze then drifts from your eyes to your lips and back again. The movement is subtle, but in that brief moment, you let your eyes fall to his lips as well.

Taehyung’s waiting for your answer, but you can’t stop thinking of what would happen if you just…

Adrenaline takes over from there, and before you fully process it, you’re leaning in to close the distance between you, pressing your lips to his. The sudden touch catches Taehyung off guard, but he quickly responds with gentle, tender kisses. A soft smile tugs at his lips as he deepens the embrace, one hand finding its way to your face while the other rests on your back, pulling you closer.

Sooner than you realize, he begins deepening the kiss as well, eliciting small, breathy moans. At this point, you can feel the tent forming in his trousers, but he makes no move to grind into you yet. Rather, the hands that grip around you tighten, not enough to hurt, but enough that your body pushes further against his firmer chest. You suspect your back will meet the hard surface of your front door within the next three seconds, allowing your entire neighborhood a show, but before then, you're interrupted by a subtle stirring in the pit of your stomach.

"Wait, I'm sorry-" you suddenly break the kiss, a rush of nerves returning. It’s been a long time since you’ve shared such meaningful kisses with someone, and the intensity of it has you feeling overwhelmed. "I'm so sorry," you repeat.

When Taehyung sees you aren’t backing away but rather standing completely still, he settles his hands around your waist, gently drawing you further into a soft embrace. "You don't need to apologize," he assures. "I'm the one who took it further than I should've when I want this to be comfortable for both of us.”

You take a small breath, "You didn't do anything wrong, Tae, I'm just a little nervous due the newness of everything. I think I’d be best if we wait before going any further tonight….but I’m also not ready for you to leave yet. Is there any way you could maybe come in for a bit? To lounge?”

Taehyung nods, “I completely understand wanting to wait. The last thing I want to do is rush anything.” Concerned about possibly pressuring you, he adds, "Are you sure about me coming in though? It's getting late and I don't want to keep you up."

"Please," you murmur, "just for a little while, if you can.”

“Okay," he agrees, thumbs brushing lightly against your sides, "I can stay."

a/n: ajdfhg, TYSM for reading!! Love you all 🥰

Tags:

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[bbunnyyy]

Desire

/dɪˈzʌɪ��/ noun A strong feeling of wanting to have something or wishing for something to happen.

!! WARNING !! smutty themes f!reader x aizawa.

☁︎ Aizawa's touch felt like a fresh breath, your bodies flush against each other. ☁︎

Summary: You and Aizawa end up getting stuck in one of the storage rooms in the left wing- not frequently visited. The tension in the air and the lack of space result in something...more.

A/N: hehe :3

A song to enjoy while reading this: if u think i'm pretty ⚬ Artemas

Your eyes fixated on Aizawa's back as his shoulders moved slightly with each step he took. He wasn't in that same old hero attire for once, since there was a press event today. You admired his chiselled figure that was poking through the white shirt and tight pants he was wearing. You swallowed, noticing how much bigger he was than you. The classrooms were running low on paper, which made Aizawa sigh and beckon you to follow him to the storage rooms to grab a few boxes of materials he needed.

Biting your bottom lip, you thought about how the last few weeks with Aizawa had been. Each moment was so warm, yet strangely sensual. It came so easily between you two. Lost in thought, you bumped into a wall- the wall making an 'oof' sound. Since when did walls make those kinds of sounds? Turns out, what you thought was a wall wasn't a wall at all.

"Still sore from yesterday, L/N?" He said smirking, referencing your sparring session. "Maybe." You said dryly, pouting while looking away. Aizawa responded by resting his hand on the small of your back. Your eyes made contact with his inky ones. He maintained the contact, tilting his head as if asking you if something was wrong. Swallowing, he turned away and continued walking in silence.

Aizawa switched on the light, commenting on how dusty it was In there. "Hold the door open for me, need space to get the boxes out," he mumbled, moving to the racks stacked with various boxes labelled with markers in bold lettering. You held the weighted grey door open, waiting for him to grab the materials he needed. Aizawa walked right into a rack, making the boxes tumble.

"Aizawa!" You exclaimed as you lunged forward in an attempt to pull him away. His body stumbled into yours. "I could have taken care of myself, L/N." Aizawa stated, just as a soft click was heard behind you two. You looked at him, whose mouth was slightly open out of shock. Well, this was awkward. You laughed nervously- "Oops?"

"I hope you do remember neither of us have the keys to open this door?" Aizawa stated, rolling his eyes. He tried moving around, your body now facing the door. Aizawa grit his teeth, throwing his head back in frustration. All this moving wasn't helping. The air felt stiff and heavy, the smell of cardboard boxes filling the air. Your chest pressed against the door, and his body clung to yours from behind- no space to move around now. Looking at the floor, you breathed out trying to think while tapping your heels on the floor anxiously.

The tension in the air could be cut with a knife. Aizawa breathed heavily into your ear, bringing you back to the present situation. "Stop moving." He commanded, his voice deeper than usual. You tried looking back to take a look at his face, but his fingers dug into the flesh on your hips. "I told you to stop moving." Aizawa breathed out, punctuating each word with a firm silence. He sounded like he was...out of breath? You didn't understand why, opening your mouth to say something sarcastic when you felt something poke your bottom half.

Aizawa pushed you forward, using his body. You pressed your hands on the shut door, trying to support yourself. He pushed into you, almost out of instinct, a moan slipping out of his mouth, smooth like honey. "I'm- sorry." Aizawa said, his hard-on pressed firm into your ass. "There's no space to mo-"

"You don't sound very sorry." You stated, trying to sound confident but just as nervous if not more than Aizawa. "L/NNhh-" Aizawa breathed into your ear, feeling around your pockets for your phone. "I think we're past last names now," you stated, out of breath yourself- unable to believe this was actually happening. Aizawa hummed, his hips pressed into yours as his hands patted your pockets. His breath was hot and heavy, the moment felt so intimate despite the awkwardness and lack of professionalism. Pulling your phone out, you rested your head against his chest as he switched on your phone. "Fuck." There's no signal here.

"I guess we're stuck here for a while then, aren't we?" You joked, pushing back at him.

[rubra-wav]

how do you think Hazbin Hotel characters would react to a demon with butterfly wings?

The main Hazbin cast x Butterfly demon reader

Part 2 >

A/N: This wasn't really specific with what charas specifically, so I'm just doing the main cast. I'll do a part 2 with more characters, though, if it's wanted (sorry)

Reader's wings are written as colourful and proportionate to their body, so they are pretty big.

Realised there's a 10 image limit per post, which is bs. Isn't how i normally would have liked it to be aesthetically bc of that 👎

Cw: Sfw, slightly suggestive stuff in Angel's, reference to decapitation and cannibalism 💀, kinda a bit angsty in Angel's and Vaggie's, gn! Reader

Charlie

- Charlie would be absolutely delighted by you, no doubt about it.

- She wants nothing more than to be in a place that's vividly colourful and (assuming reader is a somewhat colourful butterfly demon) you'd be that for her.

- She also probably just really really likes butterflies in general though, let's be real.

- I can imagine her just staring at your wings with absolutely starry eyes while complimenting them.

- "They're so pretty ohhh my gosh!"

- I imagine her being lightly jealous, she'd love to have wings like a butterfly.

- Would probably ask if she can touch, and look somewhat sad when told no due to how it would cause your scales to come off. (Assuming reader's wings are the same as normal butterfly wings)

- It may get somewhat uncomfortable if you don't like attention, she would definitely fixate heavily on them. Tell her to stop though and it's making you feel weird and she will tone it down though.

- If not, though, enjoy the attention you're gonna be getting from Charlie over them.

Vaggie

- Vaggie would likely be a bit uncomfortable about seeing demons with wings in general due to her history - let alone you with beautiful, delicate ones.

- I think she'd secretly be hiding some angst and jealously about your wings ngl.

- When she sees Charlie fawning over them though oh boy.

- Yeah she's not gonna be happy about them then. She doesn't blame you or anything for how she's feeling as it's her issue and she knows that, but it still hurts quite a bit - especially in the beginning.

- It gets less and less bad though the more she gets used to it, she kind of just becomes 'meh' about it - especially if you ask Charlie to stop being so gaga about them.

- When she gets her wings back, though, I think she'd come to think they are cool. A normal level appreciation though.

- I can half see you two helping each other out with your wings down the line if you two get closer though.

- There are some things that come with upkeep so wings don't become damaged and stuff, so the people who also have wings? Allies 100%.

Angel

- I'm gonna be fr, the first time your wings come out he's probably gonna be panicked due to his baggage.

- Especially if it happens when you're angry.

- He's probably gonna need reassurance you aren't gonna try hurt him tbh.

- As sad as it is, his trauma would definitely play a part in his initial perception of them.

- After he recovers a bit and stops immediately going into fight or flight and seeing you =/= Val though, the switch up is insane.

- He would be all over you about them.

- I can imagine him calling you a bunch of butterfly related petnames.

- If you remember the 'make those wings flap' comments he made about Husk, its gonna be that on a hundred.

- Even if it's just joking flirting about them, it's gonna be constant because he thinks they are beautiful and it's a lot of material considering you're a butterfly and he's a spider.

- I feel like he would touch them at some point without really thinking and pull his hand back to see your scales have rubbed off onto his hand and go ''oh shit.''

Husk

- I don't think he'd have much of a reaction to it at all - at least not initially.

- Of course he acknowledges that they are very pretty, but he won't comment upon it much at all unlike the others.

- Possibly may make reference to it when crafting bitter statements directed towards you, though.

- Down the line, if you grow closer to him, I can see him as actually being concerned about your wings.

- They are extremely eye-catching and unique for a being in hell, and due to that, it could lead demons to actively target you

- Whether with overt aggressive intentions to take your wings and sell them, or with more covert problems like you being scouted for modelling (ie. By Velvette)

- I can see Vaggie and you trying to set up a wing maintenance group and trying to include him in it. Him being vehemently against it to a level that's almost comedic.

- You eventually convince him even though he's complaining the whole way through it. (He is lying and actually enjoys it).

Pentious

- He wouldn't like them at all in the beginning.

- They're big and bulky and get in the way of everything, including him.

- The amount of times he's accidentally fallen due to 'tripping' on your giant ass wings is greatly irritating and embarrassing to him.

- Possibly thinks you keep trying to kill him by tripping him.

- Could also see his 'hair' (idk how to properly refer to it, haha), accidentally brushing up against your wings with how expressive it is and getting your scales all over him.

- Basically, he doesn't like them because he's clumsy but will take it out on you.

- I also get the vibe he'd be jealous because of how eye-catching they are.

- In his mind, if he had wings like that, then he'd surely have been acknowledged by the Vees in some way.

- If you change your habits with your wings to be conscious of him not being able to walk normally and start getting onto better terms, though, he will likely become appreciative of them and stop being so pissy about them.

- They are very cool looking to him, and once his poor attitude wears off about them, he'll come to admit that.

Alastor

- He'd actually be somewhat weary of you in the beginning.

- It's nature's law that creatures that do not bother to hide themselves are not to be messed with - especially in a place like hell of all places.

- When he sees that you just happen to be particularly colourful, he drops that, though.

- He'd honestly probably be thinking of what it would be like to eat a demon like you after confirming you are, in fact, not poisonous or dangerous at all.

- He doesn't much care all that much for the intrinsic beauty of things as long as they aren't utterly ugly, and as long as they aren't obnoxious and in your face.

- Depending on how bright and vibrant they are and how much attention you bring to them, he may actually dislike them.

- If not, though, he acknowledges they are nice to look at, but again, doesn't really care about them outside of theorising how they would be to eat.

- Would probably make comments about how he could "just eat your wings up," or ask you about how you taste just to try to freak you out.

Niffty

- When she sees them, her eyes grow wide in a mixture of surprise and awe. At the exact same time, an unhinged smirk spreads across her face.

- She then proceeds to leap at you, scissors or whatever sharp object is closest to her raised at your wings.

- She'd be absolutely trying to take a piece out of them for her 'collection' 💀

- You're gonna need medical attention after she's done with you because she's hellbent.

- Her obsessiveness over your wings would vary depending on your gender but either way, she'd be trying to get a piece of them for herself.

- Definitely abnormal level of appreciation of them in the absolute worst way.

- If you can get her to stop instantly trying to cut off parts of them, she's still constantly trying to touch them. You need to complain about your scales every damn time she tries to reach out to touch it without fail.

- it's like your wings are a beacon, and she's the insect gunning for it ironically.

[to-thelakes]

Reader who has an oral fixation and Luke is all to happy to help her with it.

fixation

pairing; luke alvez x fem!reader

summary; luke likes to help you out whenever he can ;)

warnings; MINORS DO NO INTERACT 18+, oral sex (m recieving), brief mention of f recieving oral, reader has an oral fixation, brief mention of p in v, dom!luke, sub!reader, kind of self-indulgent

notes; i saw this ask and uhm, immediately had to do it. i was gonna try and downplay it but i literally have an oral fixation and it's honestly so annoying to deal with but i feel like luke as a bf would make it so much better <3 this is a short and sweet like fluffy/smutty one-shot so please enjoy <3

masterlist

(yes... i'm using this gif, shut up)

From the moment that you joined the BAU, Luke suspected you had an oral fixation. There was hardly a time where you weren’t eating, chewing gum or a pen or drinking something and chewing on the end of a straw. But nobody commented on it.

Well, except once, after too many glasses of wine at Rossi’s house, Spencer had called you out on it after you made a joke about biting. You often liked to mumble that you ‘were gonna bite someone’ if you were in a bad mood or something had pissed you off. It was like a reflex phrase for you and when Reid called you out on it, you had gone rigid.

He noticed that you tried to curb your tendencies for a few weeks after that incident before you returned back to always having something to bite on. It wasn’t a bad thing. At least, Luke didn’t think so and so, when your relationship became romantic, he was always more than happy to help you out in whatever way he could.

He kept gum for you in the car or his bag. He kept mints or Jolly Ranchers or any sort of hard candy in his jacket pockets so that he could give them to you at a moment’s notice. It was an unspoken thing between the two of you and you were incredibly appreciative of him. And well, the oral fixation bled into other aspects of your life that Luke was more than willing to help you with.

Like, right now, he had had his head between your legs, pulling orgasms from you while you whined and keened. Your hands had gripped his arm as he made it hard to think straight but after pulling two or three orgasms from you, he let his lips trail back up your stomach. You were breathing heavily, hands clawing to hold any part of him and after watching him between your legs, you wanted to get between his.

“Luke,” You begged softly, tugging at him to come closer to you. He shifted, his hard cock resting heavy on your stomach as he rested his forehead against yours. Your hands moved to rest against his face, fingers scritching his stubble as you let out a breathy whine.

“Tell me what you want,” He said as his hand moved to brush down your cheeks. Your eyes reopened, hazy from the bliss but you knew what you wanted.

“Need you in my mouth, please,” You began and Luke seemed a little hesitant. You didn’t give him a chance to speak again though, “I can- I can pull away before you cum but I just need you in my mouth, please, baby. Please, I just- I want you in my mouth. That’s all I want. Just for a little bit, wanna make you feel good too, please, please,” You quickly devolved into senseless begging as you looked up at him. He groaned softly, finding it so hard to deny when your voice was so high-pitched and whiny like that.

“Okay, okay.” He gave in and the grin that spread across your face was worth it. He knew that your mind was pleasure-addled but he also knew that there was hardly a time where you didn’t desperately want to take him into your mouth. He slipped off the top of you and you clambered off the bed. Your legs were wobbly but you managed to control both yourself and him. You reached out for him and tugged him to the edge of the bed. His cock was hard and pre-cum dripped from the head and you couldn’t help the way you bit your lip.

You sank to your knees and let your kisses trail up from the crook of his knee. They were sloppy and wet, all teeth and lips as you nipped at the skin the closer you got. His thigh muscles were so strong and you loved kissing and gently biting against them. It made Luke squirm as he tried to keep his hands to himself. This was about you. Your lips trailed from his thigh up to his stomach before you pulled back, admiring his happy trail.

“Love you,” You mumbled before you took a gentle hold of his dick. You spat into the palm of your hand before wrapping it around him. You pumped once or twice and when you were sure that he was ready, you leant forward and kissed the tip of his cock. He let out a breathy groan at the sensation before you let your mouth take him in.

You hollowed your cheeks out and the way his cock stretched your mouth open, how he sat hot and heavy on your tongue. It short-circuited your brain and made it hard to concentrate but you were quick to get to work.

However, sucking his dick wasn’t the only way Luke satisfied your oral fixation. He’d be fucking you, nice and deep and slow and his hand would rest against your throat. He would never squeeze but the presence was enough to bring tantalizing pleasure up your spine. Just the power and control he had over you, did something to you. But he knew you liked to have something in your mouth and while he thrusted into you, he let his hand from your neck move up. His thumb would run across your bottom lip and gently pull your mouth open before he slipped his thumb past your lips and teeth. You would whine and keen at the sensation, sucking his thumb like you would his cock. It was embarrassing how messy you would get just from that action alone.

Luke loved it. He loved being able to fulfill that need in whatever way that you needed and it was hard to deny how gorgeous you looked with his cock - or fingers - in your mouth.

<3

[galebrainrot2024]

Gale x Tav Enemies to Lovers Part VIII/8

I'm cooking with gas now folks, I am locked in so I hope you enjoy this journey - if I have enough juice I'll try to extend it through the entire game arc.

Content Warning: Bullying, Anxiety, Language, Herbs (lol)

“Fucking finally,” Karlach huffed, dropping a majority of their belongings and rations. Without her, Lae’zel and Shadowheart, Tav wasn’t sure they would have made it to the Underdark. The men were utterly useless in this regard and so was she. She had many strengths - strength was not among them. “I’m not sorting through what’s what so come and find your own things. Gale what’s for dinner? I’m starving. No… I need to lie down.” 

“As always, I am deeply in your debt my good Lady,” Tav watched as Gale bowed to Karlach and collected his things from her then winked,  “I’ll be sure to make your favorite.” A pang shot through her - not one of desire or even anger. 

It was jealousy. She scoffed, rolling her eyes at her own behavior. Don’t be ridiculous, she chided, Karlach is your friend and Gale is allowed to talk with whomever he pleases… they’ve been spending a lot of time together… besides, you know who Karlach fancies and it’s certainly not Gale… you have no right to be angry after Astarion… 

Her stomach twisted uncomfortably and she turned away as hot bile rose in her gut. She shook it off and began to unpack her things. 

** 

The Underdark. She had studied its existence extensively in her time at Blackstaff and was both horrified and fascinated by its unfamiliar terrain. Their instructor would pull at the fabric of the Weave to make intricate conjurations of the Underdark’s dangerous creatures, wild mushrooms, and native fauna. Some was so startling to her that at the time she was plagued with night terrors. How embarrassing it felt to have night terrors as a teen. It had been engrained so deep that the fear still dug at her skin and she felt the surge of fight or flight acutely.   

Gale had been in that class with her. 

That grounded her a bit, the memory of his ‘know-it-all’ attitude getting him a severe bind. Gale had famously confused the Duergar and Drow and when their instructor, Flhem, tried to gently correct him, Gale persisted. What Gale didn’t realize at the time was that other than Flhem being an expert on the Underdark, Tav’s father was also an expeditionist there. 

She was intimately familiar with the Underdark and had an insatiable curiosity for it. The obsession took hold when she was wracked with panic that her father wouldn’t return from a journey. Tav turned to her fixation on learning in order to soothe her nerves. If she learned everything she could, she could imagine every possible scenario and outcome so she couldn’t be surprised. 

A wave of guilt rose in her when the rest of the memory unfolded. After Gale’s soliloquy, Tav tapped on his shoulder (he was sat in front of her) and she said smugly,  “Gale… I thought you were smarter than that,” all while pulling at the threads of the Weave to manifest replicas of the Duegar and Drow, “Or did you miss the readings? If you look to page 27...” She said while the class held its breath, “there are a number of distinctions between the two races… height being prominent among them.” As she spoke the final word, the two conjurations stood before the class and Gale flipped to the page. She inhaled deeply when she recalled the look on his face when the entire class - including Flhem - burst into laughter. Have you always been so cruel… you wretched thing… the memory weighed heavily on her, and she fingered her amulet. 

He hadn't even said anything in retort. Gale had just quietly shut the book and had turned to look back at her before he left the room. The look he gave was one she would never forget. It made her sick.

Suddenly she felt something graze her back and she jumped, swinging her arm to strike. 

Astarion’s hand caught hers and he rose a brow. A grin spread across his face. “My, my, somebody’s on edge this evening."  Tav huffed, her entire body rigid from the start. She shut her eyes and took another breath to steady herself. “Oh,” Astarion said more seriously, “Are you alright, Darling? Can I get you something?” 

Tav tilted her head curiously. Astarion? Going out of his way to ask something nice? Assuming she heard him incorrectly, she said, “Nothing a bit of Hafling Root can’t fix.” 

“Oh?” He said in a sing-song voice, “Looking to get a little stoned this evening? Far be it from me to keep you from your appetites. Ugh,” he straightened his shirt, picking a piece of lint off his sleeve. “I wish I could still experience that. I’m afraid I’d need an entire field to feel a damn thing. Enjoy for the both of us,” he looked at her and brushed her cheek with the back of his hand, his voice low. “Maybe I’ll join you, still.. keep you company.”  

Tav felt the familiar rush of arousal flood her when Astation’s hand brushed her cheek. Although they had little in common and she wasn’t sure if she even trusted him, biology was a strange experience. In that same moment, her eyes locked on Gale’s - his gaze an abyss that was almost wild. The same one that made her sick all those years ago.  

She took a sharp breath and neither she nor Gale blinked. She fell into the void of his eyes, hypnotized. Had he cast hold person on her? Astarion’s voice pulled her abruptly back into her body, “Well.. you know where to find me.”  

When Tav turned back to look for Gale he was gone. 

[stoopid-turtle]

On the Acceptance of Unsteady Ground

Throughout this whole dive into turtle world, I've been very conscious of just how LITTLE access to information I have. I'm relying so heavily on English translations and platforms, and most of these are from turtles, so I'm fully aware I'm getting a biased perspective.

I've tried to read stuff from solos or even just neutral third-parties. The neutral parties don't have much depth of information, though, and I found solos heavy on accusations and declarations but light on actual...evidence. And they sometimes use some really nasty rhetoric against the idea that gg and dd might be gay.

Don't get me wrong, turtles get weird too. There's plenty of clearly false rumors, deceptively edited videos, silly stretches of logic, weird ideas of what how people in a relationship would act, etc. But there's at least enough English-speaking turtles that I can find some who are giving open and, as far as I can tell, accurate information (honestly, I find tumblr turtledom better at that then other platforms). I haven't really found a similar pocket of solo fans.

I'm also aware that there's always going to be a limit on how much I can know. I don't speak the language, so I'm always relying on translators. I have limited access to Weibo (even putting aside the language barrier, I'm in text confirmation limbo in actually getting an account), and I have little familiarity with the culture. I don't get a lot of the jokes or references, and stuff may strike me, an English-speaking American, differently than it would someone in China.

Add on top of that the fact that I'm trying to find out purposely obscured information about two celebrities, and, yeah, I'm fully aware that I'm on unsteady ground here. I can do my best, but I'm never going to know anything for certain.

But I've become okay with that.

It took a while. The dissatisfaction with the unknown (and unknowable) is what drove a lot of my early fixation and subsequent fall into the turtle pit. But now, especially after laying out my thoughts, I've reached a zen place with it. I'm 100% certain ggdd were together during filming/promo, and I'm 95% certain they're still together (I had this at 85% originally, but then the whole dd being sick and gg changing his schedule thing happened and I'm just...welp, guess I'm in this confidence interval, then).

Just having that certainty means I can enjoy updates from them without anguishing about "proof" or uncertainty. Oh, gg took the day off on dd's birthday? That's really sweet! I'm not gonna fuss about if it's coincidence ENOUGH to convince me, because I'm already convinced. It's a good place to be.

I typically don't care about celebrities. In fact, I've long been bewildered by celebrity culture here in the US, and I've often been actively annoyed when people assume/expect me to have opinions on things celebrities do. I'm the nerd who doesn't get why the actors get all the attention when the writer or director would be much more interesting.

So the fact that I've gone all fangirlish over two celebrities is bizarre to me, and I appreciate the irony. Well done, me. I attribute some of it to just being able to watch the bts and see their early interactions play out like a story. I find stories compelling, and both gg and dd are charismatic, attractive and have great chemistry. Whatever disdain I have for celebs, I do love a romance.

In my foray into the ggdd world, though, I've also had to learn more about c-ent, and y'all. It's nuts. Like, US entertainment is nuts too, but c-ent ratchets it up to 11. I've been in fandom a long time, and I thought I'd seen some weird stuff, but it's got nothing on c-ent. Just wrapping my head around the culture these guys are in took a lot of learning.

But I appreciate being able to dive into this culture and this country, because I knew very little about China beyond the antagonistic politics. It's been refreshing to get a view on life on the ground in China to humanize the folks there and get a clearer picture of the country.

I started this thing bc I had been spending so much time on Youtube watching clips, and I had thoughts and opinions and nowhere to put them. I already had a tumblr that I use to lurk on some fandoms and I had started following turtles too. I figured tumblr would be a decent place to splurge out my thoughts, so I set up a throwaway account to do so.

I get the vibe that a lot of new turtles come to bjyx through the same route I took? They watch The Untamed on Netflix. They get curious about the show and start watching some clips on YT. Next thing you know, they have 3 playlists full of purported "proof of love" and they need a whiteboard to connect everything together and their wife thinks they've gone completely bonkers supports them in all their oddities.

Like, I was really confused by turtles at first. I was just trying to watch bts videos on YouTube and I didn't know what bjyx meant, but the videos with the label were weird and had strange disclaimers that they were "only for turtles" and I had no clue what that even meant.

My confusion continued as I tried to read more. The fake story disclaimer convention is hella confusing as an outsider, and my first impression was that turtles were kinda crazy. The videos I saw gave overviews of candies without context, and some of them explicitly said they were proof of Yizhan love while still having that fake story disclaimer. Basically, it was a big confusing environment, and it's why I resisted buying into bjyx so hard for so long. It all seemed delulu.

But in reading more, I guess part of that is the point? Recognizing that gg and dd are in a vulnerable position should their relationship ever come out, having so much noise to muddy the waters makes a twisted, clownish sense. I don't know who came up with that convention or if it just kinda happened (is it a normal thing in c-ent? I don't know enough about celebrity fandoms), but hats off, I guess.

With the supertopic recently hitting 4 million active fans, there's something heartening about such a depth of support for the guys. I'm not naive enough to think all 4 million (plus international fans) are allies to LGBT folk in general, but it surely means something to ggdd to have that sort of support for their relationship. Honestly, it means something to me, as a random gay chick on the other side of the world, to see a gay couple get that kinda of support behind them.

I started watching the bts because I was afraid there'd be a lot of cynical homophobia on the set or some evidence of all the male cast being icked out by the whole thing. Instead, I got gg, who was so passionate about WWX being gay. I love that everybody knew they were telling a love story with as explicitly as they could get away with. I love that the guys wanted more Wangxian scenes and that the cast and crew made "everyday is everyday" jokes in a non-mocking way. I'm glad that the whole shoot seemed like such a positive environment for the cast and crew to being themselves and tell a type of story that they may not be able to be involved with ever again.

So, yes, this is my zen turtle place. When I set up a soapbox for myself, I didn't think too much about the fact that people would respond, but I'm so grateful to have had a chance to talk to some other turtles! Everybody is lovely and thank you for sharing my enthusiasm.

Like I said in the beginning, I don't have the time to keep super-active in the long-term. I had intended to write up my thoughts and poof away. But I do also plan to keep up with gg and dd and turtles, so instead I'm just gonna leave off with the potential for further posts down the line.

I'm not gonna be incredibly active, so please don't expect frequent updates or interactions from me. But if I have more Yizhan thoughts I'll pop up again with a post (I mean, I do have lots more thoughts, but nothing energizing enough to write about), or I'll leave a comment somewhere if I have something I simply must say. I'm also open to responding to asks about the timeline or anything else. And if I ever do stumble across anything groundbreaking with regards to the timeline, I'll probably add that in, because I'm particular about things being complete.

So thanks for being so welcoming! It's been a joy to clown around and make up completely fictional stories with everybody here. 🤡🐢🙇🏼

[avatarrecom]

Day 18: Mirror sex

Pairing: Poly!recoms x Recom!reader (can be read as character x reader)

Word count: 1.5k

A/N: Trying to get the other prompts out asap. Also, I'm curious, do you guys think my kinktober headcanons fit the Recoms? Or not? or would you change certain things about how I write them? And what do you guys think of my characterization?

Kinktober masterlist

🌍 Recom Miles Quaritch Miles would look incredibly attractive fucking you from behind, but what about doing it in front of a mirror? His abs would be flexing, and drops of sweat would be racing down the side of his face. It's like he's relentlessly pounding you while all you can do is moan and whimper like the passionate lover you are. He would grab your hair and force you to watch as he fucks you. He would whisper things in your ear like, "Look at yourself while I make love to you" or "You look so beautiful like this, my darling." You would appear disheveled, with your hair tousled in all directions, bite marks scattered across your body, and dark purple marks on your thighs and neck. But in his eyes, you would look like a heavenly being sent from above. He would hold your arms behind your back with one hand and have another hand in your hair while he admires the movement of your ass with each forceful thrust. "That's it, my love, just like that, make love to me." You would push your hips back against his while gazing at him through the mirror. You observe as his perfectly sculpted face contorts in pleasure as you bring him to climax, and in return, he gives you the release you desire.

😈 Recom Lyle Wainfleet Lyle enjoys watching himself disappear inside of you in the steamy Recom gym mirrors. He loves hearing your pleasurable sounds and the way you respond when he takes you from behind. The reflection of your bodies entwined on his cock is a sight that drives him wild. Your effort to keep your eyes open and connected with him, despite the lewdness of it all, is incredibly arousing to Lyle. Every time you moan his name, it sends him over the edge. He loves seeing your jaw drop in pleasure and feeling your hands desperately gripping his thighs for stability. Lyle would have you spread your legs wide and position yourselves near one of the full-length mirrors. This way, he can hit different spots and press you against the mirror if he desires. He showers you with praise for being so good and obedient, never tearing your eyes away from your reflection. As he indulges in the moment, Lyle lets out soft hums and moans, leaving marks on your shoulder in the form of hickeys.

🍬 Recom Z-dog You're seated with your back to her chest, nestled between her legs. There's a mirror right in front of you. You're completely bare, exposed, and she's gently pleasuring you with her hand. Whenever you close your eyes or look away, she pauses until you're gazing at your own reflection again. "Look at how stunning you are," she whispers in your ear. She continues her actions, showering you with compliments, moving her hand at an excruciatingly slow pace as you breathe heavily, your eyes half-closed, fixated on the mirror. Eventually, she picks up the pace, skillfully working your body like only she knows how, always ensuring your eyes are open, focused on your own reflection throughout. She insists on making you watch as you reach climax, releasing all over her fingers, your face flushed. Z-dog adores you, she adores your physique, and she wants to ensure you can fully appreciate your own sexiness.

🥽 Recom Walker She's skilled at stimulating you with her fingers. Her fingers are lengthy and slender, allowing her to reach deep and stimulate your pleasure spot effortlessly. Walker enjoys watching herself finger you in the mirror from behind, with her chin resting on your shoulder. Her groans of pleasure are so arousing that your legs spread involuntarily, and her attractive smirk only adds to the excitement.

😎 Recom Mansk It’s a sight to behold in the bathroom mirror, the way he holds you close. He moves his hips slowly, one hand spread wide across your lower belly, the other resting in the curve between your breasts, keeping you connected to his chest. You observe as he makes love to you, taking his time and showing his ownership, causing your eyelids to flutter with each deep thrust. "You belong to me, my love," he whispers in your ear, his fingertips gently tracing up your chest. "You understand that, right?" Your words of affection are whispered as his hand delicately covers your throat, so tender and gentle. His thumb strokes a gentle rhythm against your pulse as he thrusts deeply into your warm, velvety cunt. "You are completely mine."

🧯 Recom Prager "That's my good kitten," Prager says with a smirk as you moan beneath him, tears of pleasure welling up in your eyes. You've lost count of how many times you've climaxed tonight, but you're not complaining. Prager has kept you on the edge of ecstasy all night long, and he's enjoyed every moment of it. With your bodies facing the mirror, he's watched every reaction, every moan, every whine. He loves seeing you in your full glory, with nothing hidden from view. And he's not done yet - he thrusts into you once more, desperate to see that look on your face just one more time.

⚕️ Recom Ja You're lying on your bed, completely vulnerable, facing the mirror propped up against the closet doors across the room. He jumps on you, kissing and exploring your body, teasing and pleasuring you. He positions himself behind you, using his strong thighs as a seat for you to move up and down. "Look at yourself, see how beautiful you are. See yourself as I see you," he insists, making you blush even more. Whenever you try to look away from the mirror, he grabs your jaw, forcing you to watch as he intensifies your pleasure. "See those amazing breasts bounce," he growls in your ear. "They look even better when they bounce in my face." "Watch my cock, my love, see how eager your cunt is for it," he moans. "Watch it - going in and out, you're getting wet, darling." "Look at your little clit. Does it want attention?" He teases, with a condescending tone as he rubs your clit. He enjoys making you watch yourself cum. "Oh, you're getting close? I can tell. Your pussy is gripping me so tight. Watch yourself cum, love. It's the most beautiful thing," You can't help but stare into the reflection of your own eyes, mouth hanging open and nothing but incoherent moans escaping. He praises you, slowing down the intense rhythm of your movements to help you come down. Mirror sex quickly becomes a weekly ritual.

🧢 Recom Brown When he gazes into the mirror, his focus is usually on himself. However, when he's with you in front of one, his attention is solely on your body. He takes in every inch of you, positioning you in a way that allows him to fully appreciate the sight of you while he's inside you. It's a sight that he finds absolutely mesmerizing and one that he could never tire of. If you're not comfortable with mirror sex, he won't pressure you into it. Instead, he'll work to build your confidence and reassure you of your beauty. He understands that it's not for everyone, but if you're willing to give it a try, he'll put in the effort to make it an enjoyable experience for both of you. What's surprising is that he's not just into mirror sex, but he's also full of praise. Despite his severe personality, he's quick to shower you with compliments and encouragement. He wants you to feel confident and comfortable with him, and he's more than willing to reciprocate the praise. In short, mirror sex may not be for everyone, but with him, it's an experience that's worth trying. He'll make sure that you feel comfortable and confident, and he'll show you just how great it can be.

📿 Recom Lopez Lopez has a firm grip on your throat, his fingers clasping your jaw tightly. He's making you look at yourself in the mirror, taking in your flushed face and glazed eyes, as well as your bouncing breasts as he effortlessly thrusts into you. You feel even more embarrassed as you try to turn away from your disheveled appearance. Lopez, however, urges you on, cooing and nibbling at your neck while meeting your gaze in the mirror. "Come on, Mami," he whispers, "see yourself the way I do."

⛓️ Recom Fike Fike loves fucking you in front of a mirror. he loves seeing his cock slide in and out of you and he loves that you’re seeing how beautiful you look while he’s fucking you. Definitely the type to take it slow and sensually when he’s fucking you in front of the mirror. He gets totally lost in watching you watch yourself in the mirror. He’s kinda in a daze and he doesn’t notice anything else but you. The others definitely walked in on you guys more than a few times.

[ssahotstuff]

Aaron Hotchner x reader (virgin/innocent reader)

Part 4

Part 3 can be found here

Warnings: fingering, oral fem receiving, unprotected sex, angst with Haley, cursing, some alcohol use, angst in general kinda

Word Count: 5.4k

The day Jack went home, Aaron called Haley beforehand to tell her they needed to talk. You were down the hall with Jack, cleaning up his room with him, helping him organize everything the way it had been prior. You often helped him get ready to go back home, he usually asked you to.

"The next time I come to your house, can we make donuts? I saw a video on YouTube and it looks really easy," Jack often helped you in the kitchen—the two of you were always baking treats for Aaron to take on cases, and to enjoy with the two of you when he came home. Haley's newfound attitude had put a damper on the time you'd usually be spending with him—but hopefully Aaron could convince Haley that you weren't so bad after all.

"As long as your mom is okay with it," you didn't want to crush his spirits, but you were planning from this moment forward to run everything by Haley so you didn't step on any toes.

"I'll ask her when I get home! I have to get your picture too!"

A moment later, Aaron was coming down the hall to collect the two of you so you could leave. Aaron's hand found yours, so instead of getting in the car as he put Jack in his seat, you stood behind him as he worked. Once he had Jack's door closed, he turned to you.

"When we get to Haley's, let me do the talking, that way she gets mad at me, not you."

You nodded, sighing heavily. You didn't want Aaron to be the target of her fury either, and that also meant you were completely unable to defend yourself against anything she might have to say to you in return.

Aaron hated how much this was hurting you. Haley was already unhappy on the phone, and it would only get worse when the two of you arrived to talk. Aaron knew Haley well enough to know she wouldn't make this easy for him, or you, but he had to try.

✨✨✨

45 minutes later, you were seated on Haley's patio in a chair next to Aaron. Haley was sitting across from you while Jack stayed inside with Haley's sister Jessica, who seemed much more pleasant by far. She'd greeted you with a warm smile, and even shot Haley a sideways glance when Haley refused to acknowledge you.

"There's nothing in our divorce agreement that says he's allowed to stay with your girlfriend," she spat, getting straight to the point. You did as Aaron asked and sat quietly, your hands folded neatly in your lap.

"There's also not a single word about him coming home if I have a case," he countered, knowing that was an arrangement she'd decided out of nowhere just to try and get back at him.

"Does she even know anything about taking care of a kid, Aaron? He's on a schedule, I can't have some random stranger you're sleeping with this month—"

Aaron cut her off quickly, his voice calm yet stern.

"That's really rich coming from you—how many random strangers did he see when you were sleeping around during our marriage, Haley?"

You brain was fixated on what she had said—had there been many women before you? Secrets he was keeping because he was embarrassed? He'd only ever told you about Haley, but they'd been apart for two and a half years when you met—that gave him plenty of time to do whatever he wanted.

"You honestly think that little of me, Aaron? Jack never saw a thing on my end," she defended, turning on the tears—Aaron's posture immediately changed when she started to cry; he softened visibly, moving his hands to the table, almost as if he wanted to reach out and comfort her.

"I—I shouldn't have said that, Haley. I'm sorry. I just don't understand why you're changing your mind now. We've been together nearly a year. She's a part of Jack's life," Haley sniffled, wiping her eyes before she said anything else. You felt as powerless as ever, watching her play Aaron like a fiddle.

"You don't even live together—he bounces around enough between my place and yours. He doesn't need another place to get used to."

Haley was finding any excuse in the world to keep Jack away from you. Aaron felt like he was running out of options—there wasn't a clear solution, not one that Haley would agree to anyway.

"She's not going anywhere, Haley. I'm not letting you take this away from me," Aaron was exasperated, feeling like he was being pulled around on a string, still controlled by Haley long after their relationship had ended.

"I'm not budging on this, Aaron. Unless you want to fight me in court, Jack comes home when you get a case. End of discussion."

She stood from the table and opened the door leading inside, signifying that the conversation was over and that the two of you needed to leave. Jack came rushing from his room, running right up to you and Aaron. He gave you both a big hug before turning his attention to you.

"I can't find your picture anywhere. Mommy, have you seen it?"

Haley gave Jack a sympathetic smile before looking to you, shooting you an icy glare before she replied.

"I'm so sorry, Jack! I must've thrown it away," you could hear the venom seething from her words, your heart nearly torn in two at how vindictive Aaron's ex wife could truly be.

Once you were in Aaron's car, you expected him to say something—anything that might make you feel a tiny bit better about the situation. You were stone cold silent, staring out the passenger window as he navigated you back to his house. He had both hands on the wheel, his eyes set straight ahead on the road.

The silence didn't end until his phone rang. He answered it quickly, and you assumed it was work on the other end, about to pull him away from you before you could even talk.

"I'll be there in an hour. You can start without me, I'll get up to speed on the jet," he said, glancing over at you quickly. He knew the timing wasn't ideal, but he couldn't help when his job took him away from you. He hung up the phone and cleared his throat, his hand coming across the console to rest on your thigh.

"I don't think it'll always be like this. She just needs time to get used to you is all," he said, trying to sound as optimistic as he could given the circumstances. In your eyes, Aaron was still trying to defend her—you couldn't imagine having an ex that had done you as dirty as she did—and you especially couldn't fathom defending them over Aaron. You knew there was a major difference—there was a child involved. But you were perfectly capable of taking care of him. Aaron hadn't bothered mentioning that, though.

"Yeah, you're probably right."

You didn't bother looking away from the window. Aaron knew you were upset; you had every right to be. He knew if the roles were reversed, he'd be livid. For the first time in your relationship, he was worried—afraid of how this might make things exponentially harder on you in the future. If Haley didn't come around, it would certainly make your life much more difficult than it needed to be. He was afraid you'd grow tired of the fights and drama and leave him alone—and that was the last thing that he wanted.

When you got back to Aaron's house, he led you inside while he gathered his things to get ready to leave. You sat on the bed and watched him buzz around the room quietly, stewing in your own frustrations about the situation. Aaron let you be; he didn't want to make things worse. He leaned down to kiss you, tilting your chin upward with his fingertips.

"I love you. I'll call you tonight, okay?"

You nodded, smiling back at him—you knew there was so much more that needed to be said, but instead, you told him you loved him too and let him walk out the door. You swallowed that feeling of dread that came from all of your unanswered questions and tried to compose yourself as much as possible. You should've known Haley would outcast you, and you wouldn't dare put Aaron in a position where he had to defy the mother of his child. It would only end bad for everyone involved.

You decided then that Haley would have to try a hell of a lot harder to push you away. Aaron and Jack were your life, your future, and just because she'd let it slip away before didn't mean you were going to make the same mistake.

✨✨✨

When the week began, you tried to put all of your energy into work so you wouldn't have time to think about anything else. At the end of the day on Wednesday, your boss had called you into his office, which had you worried the entire walk from your floor to his. Mr. Jennings wasn't exactly a kind person—in fact, he was terrifying. He wasn't a man of many words, so the fact that he wanted to talk to you had your palms sweating profusely as you knocked on the door to his office. He called for you to come in, so you opened the door and shot him a dazzling smile, hoping it would soften the blow.

"Hi, sir. You wanted to see me?"

He gave you a once-over, taking you in fully, making you feel exposed and vulnerable. He nodded towards the empty chair nearest to you so you sat, crossing your legs and clasping your hands together.

"You've been on fire this week."

You were taken aback that he'd noticed, given his usual lack of recognition to the majority of the people on your team. This was a rare occurrence to your knowledge, so you were slightly baffled.

"Just trying to make the most of my time, sir."

He gave you a tight lipped smile, nodding to the paperwork on his desk.

"More than that. You've exceeded every expectation we have. That's an impressive feat."

You weren't sure what to say, so you just nodded, smoothing out your skirt nervously.

"Thank you sir," you said finally, and he cleared his throat, holding up what looked like a contract—which really confused you.

"I'm offering you a partnership. The flexibility will allow you to work from home if you want, just keep showing me the kind of initiative I've been seeing the last couple of weeks. You'll get a sign on bonus and an official title change; a raise and a car from the fleet, too."

This was the last thing you had expected. You knew you'd been working harder to avoid the current problems at hand, but you didn't know it would lead to such a monumental moment in your career.

"Wow—sir, thank you. I don't even know what to say."

He handed you a pen so you could make it official, shaking your hand firmly as he stood to his feet.

"You can clean out your desk and take the rest of the day off, start fresh at home tomorrow. You deserve it. See Angie at the front desk to get the keys to your new ride," he beamed happily back at you as you gathered your copy of the new contract and headed back to your desk for the last time. You couldn't wait until Aaron was home—there was cause for celebration, and you couldn't have been happier.

✨✨✨

Aaron was running on two days of no sleep when he finally reached his hotel room, exhausted to tears. He collapsed on the bed after kicking off his shoes, immediately checking his phone to see if it was too late to call you. He had to factor in the time zone difference, but it was still kind of early for you, so he hit send, waiting to hear your voice fill the other line.

"Hey, baby. Miss me yet?"

Your lighthearted demeanor was exactly what Aaron needed right now. The case was taking a toll on everyone—the ones involving children usually did. He was praying for a break, desperate to make it back home to you without falling apart beforehand.

"More than you could ever imagine. It's been rough," the last thing he wanted to do was tell you about the case; he couldn't really, and you didn't deserve the nightmares that it would surely cause you.

"I'm so sorry baby. I know it isn't easy. What can I do to make it better for you?" Your voice was soft and as sweet as candy, already easing part of his worries just by answering the phone when he called.

"I just need you, to hear your voice. How was work today?"

Aaron was thrilled to hear about your promotion, the fact that you could work from anywhere really opened a lot of doors for you. You weren't tied down to the office, which meant you could stay with him more and just work from the comfort of his office if you wanted to. You were so excited to tell him, it only made him wish he would've been there when you got off work to hear the news firsthand.

"We'll celebrate when I get back. The ladies have been wanting to see you; we could go out, if you wanted," Aaron typically didn't frequent the team's nights out at clubs, but for you, he was willing to make plenty of exceptions.

"You hate going out," you reminded him, but what he liked didn't matter as long as you were happy in the long run.

You talked until Aaron couldn't hold his eyes open any longer. He knew there was a lot left to be said about the situation Haley had put the two of you in, but for now, all that mattered was that you'd be waiting for him when he got back.

✨✨✨

The next time you saw Haley was without Aaron. He was still out of town, but you'd decided to take your work to the local coffee shop. You hadn't expected to see her, considering this wasn't her part of town, but you decided to say something anyway, just to be polite. You managed to catch her attention as she was waiting for her order, walking up to her with your head held high.

"Haley! How funny running into you here," she nodded back at you, looking around before she spoke.

"I'm surprised you're talking to me without Aaron here to defend you," she quipped, but you weren't taking her bait, not by a long shot.

"Defend me from what, you? I choose not to speak—unlike you, I don't want an argument," it was the last thing in the world that you wanted honestly, but she refused to let things be simple.

"There isn't anything to argue about. You are just a placeholder—something to keep Aaron occupied until he comes back home. You think you'll take my place, be his wife one day? Think again—he may love you, but he will never give you his last name."

She said it as if it were a stone cold fact—that it had already been decided. You didn't let this break you; you kept a brave face and blinked back the frustration so you could have the last word.

"Believe me when I say that the second we decide to get married, you'll be the first one with an invitation, Haley. Wouldn't want you to miss out on Aaron marrying the love of his life," you gave her the brightest smile you could muster before walking back to your table and continuing your work. She was playing a dangerous game, trying to come between you and Aaron—one that she wouldn't win, no matter how hard she tried.

✨✨✨

"So, have you met Haley yet?"

Emily was the first to ask after they practically pulled you to the bar to do shots. Aaron had given you a happy nod and told you to go have fun, sitting in a booth with Spencer and Derek. You were sandwiched between Emily and JJ, and Penelope was to your far left, listening in when she could. The topic of Haley piqued everyone's interest, so you had their full attention.

"Oh yes. She hates me, to put it mildly," you told them, and Emily snickered in response.

"I'll bet she does. You're pretty, funny, and young! I'm sure she despises you," Emily said, passing you a shot before taking one for herself.

"You can't let a woman like Haley bring you down. She didn't want Hotch, but she didn't want to see him happy with someone else. It was so toxic," JJ explained. You wondered how Aaron had lasted so long in something so obviously deteriorating; did he see the signs and ignore them? Would he do the same in your relationship? You'd never know, but you'd always wonder.

"Sounds like it," you agreed, hoping the conversation shifted to something lighter—you didn't want to spend your night of celebration talking about the one person in the world who couldn't stand you.

From across the bar, Aaron could see your discomfort. He was immediately rethinking the entire night judging from the look on your face alone. He didn't want to interrupt if you were busy, so he sent you a text asking if you wanted to meet him outside for some air instead. He went in the direction of the front door, deciding he'd wait for you at the side of the building where it was less crowded.

You didn't bother replying—you told the girls you needed some air and they let you go without argument. You had just rounded the corner when you saw him, leaned up against the brick wall of the building. Even in the lamplight he looked delicious; you were convinced he'd worn the olive green polo just to tease you all night. His arms were practically bulging through the tiny sleeves; you'd caught more than one woman staring at him tonight.

Your fingers felt his belt loops as you leaned into him, resting your head on his chest. You could still hear the music pouring from the speakers inside, but you could feel the drumming of his heart, beating wildly in his chest.

"Talk to me; you don't look happy," Aaron could tell your mood had been off for days, but he hadn't said anything. This was the first time he'd seen you in five days, so he hadn't really had the chance. He'd known something was up though, just from your voice on the phone.

"I'm fine, really. I just have a headache is all," you told him, but he wasn't buying it—not tonight.

"Don't tell me that. Something's going on with you, and I can see it. Is this about Haley? Is that what you want to do tonight?" He knew how accusatory it sounded, but he couldn't take it back now. Your hands fell from his sides and you backed away, taking a step forward back towards the door.

"No, it isn't. I'm not doing this, Aaron."

You sighed heavily before making your way back inside. Aaron stayed behind for a few moments, giving you enough time to find the girls before he came back inside. He decided then that he'd keep his distance for the rest of the night—he'd already made you upset when the night was supposed to be centered around you.

Derek gave Aaron a curious look when Aaron joined him at the table. Aaron sipped his drink and prayed no one said anything, but Derek wasn't letting him off that easily.

"Trouble in paradise?"

Aaron shook his head, not wanting to air out their business, but at the same time, he did want an outside perspective on things.

"I don't know. Haley doesn't like her—I'm in a tricky position trying to make them both happy—trying to keep things civil," he finished off the rest of his drink and decided he was done for the night so he could drive the two of you home.

"Woah—why in the world do you care about making Haley happy? Haley isn't your friend, Hotch. She's your ex wife. You have a custody agreement signed by a judge—she can't keep Jack from you. Pleasing my ex wife would be the last thing on my mind if I had a woman like you've got," Derek said, glancing towards the bar where you sat, looking like there was a personal rain cloud above your head, pouring on what was supposed to be a good night.

"It's not about pleasing Haley—it's about Jack's parents getting along to some degree."

Derek shook his head, leaning in closer.

"You pick Jack up, and drop him off. There is no getting along. What do you have to talk about? You're not friends, Hotch! The longer you ride the fence, the higher your chances are of only having Haley to turn to in the end," he said flatly, standing up to go to the bar. He left Aaron alone to think about what he'd said; as much as he hated to admit it, Derek was right.

You were seated between Emily and JJ when Aaron came up behind you, leaning down to whisper in your ear.

"Want to get a milkshake before we head home?"

Aaron was trying to salvage what was left of your night, hoping you wouldn't turn away from him again. You gave him a nod and said your goodbyes, taking his hand as he led you to the front door. As soon as you'd made your exit he was turning to you, taking both of your hands in his.

"I'm sorry. I've been handling this all wrong, this situation with Haley. I've been trying to put your feelings and hers in the same category and that isn't fair. I don't care what Haley thinks; I only want you to be happy," he told you, his eyes full of remorse. He hated that you spent so much of your night mad at him over what he'd said.

"It's okay, Aaron. I don't ever expect you to be on my side when it comes to Haley. You two have a lot more history than we do; I get it, really," even though you understood, it didn't make it hurt any less. Haley thought that their past trumped his current feelings.

"I'm always on your side! I know it doesn't seem like it, but I am," he defended, raising his voice loud enough to draw the attention of a group of young guys passing by. One of them quickly asked if you were okay and you nodded, removing your hands from Aaron's grasp so you could wipe the tears from your eyes.

"So I'm just supposed to sit around and listen to her talk about me like I'm not in the room for the rest of my life? And what's even worse is that you don't open your mouth to defend me, not even the slightest."

You turned around and walked in the direction of the car with Aaron on your heels. He unlocked the car so you could climb in, waiting to start the vehicle until you'd finished your conversation.

"I know that I let her get away with saying some inexcusable things. That's on me. What I'm telling you now is that I won't ever do it again. I'm aware that I've made mistakes—please let me fix them."

He opened the glovebox and found you a pack of tissues, moving the middle console so he could come closer. He dabbed at the mascara running down your  face gently, trying not to irritate your skin. Your breathing was shaky and shallow as you tried to calm down, finally turning to look at him for the first time since you'd gotten in the vehicle. The minute your eyes caught his gaze, his face softened, his hand coming to cup your face as you leaned into his touch.

"She made me feel so stupid, Aaron. It's all I've thought about since it happened," Aaron took you in his arms, kissing you on the top of the head as you finally gave in and let him comfort you. He'd been gone so long it felt silly to fight it any longer; now that the air had been cleared, you finally felt like you'd be able to rest. You'd spent the week stressing about Haley and the interaction you'd had with her; wondering how you were going to confront Aaron and finish your conversation. Between that and your new job title, your week had been a big ball of nerves. You were finally getting the chance to calm down a little.

"I love you so much. I'm so sorry she made you feel that way; I'll never let her get away with it again baby. I thought I was keeping the peace, but I was just making a mess," he explained, letting go of you long enough to try to get a look at your features in the darkness of the car. He hated to see you upset, especially because of something that he'd done.

"I love you. I know you had good intentions, Aaron. I also know we're both new to this. We're gonna figure it out together, okay?"

Aaron was thankful for your patience; he'd never expected to love anyone else, so he was clueless as to what he was supposed to do when it came to Haley. Clearly he hadn't been making the right choices up to this point; he'd have to change or risk losing you, and that wasn't happening.

"Together. Now let's get you that milkshake."

✨✨✨

Later that night you were tucked into bed next to him, his shirt draped over your body, his hand on your bare thigh as the tv droned on in the background. You stopped paying attention to it when his hand began to move upward, his eyes still trained on the television. Before you knew it, he was parting your thighs, scooting down on the bed so he could lay between your legs. It started innocently enough; his head on your thighs as he tried and failed to focus on the movie he'd picked out. Soon enough, he gave up, rolling over on his stomach so he could kiss the sensitive flesh of your inner thighs. After a rocky start to your night, Aaron was going to make sure the remainder of the evening was spent making you happy.

"I love you—so fucking much," he breathed, his mouth hovering directly above your center, nothing but a tiny piece of fabric in the way.

"I love you, Aaron. Always," you promised him as his hands crept upward to pull your panties down. Aaron took a deep breath as he spread you open, eyes darting between you and your dripping core. He ran a teasing finger through your slick before settling on your clit, rubbing small, precise circles over your bundle of nerves. He always knew exactly how to touch you, driving you mad as soon as his hands were on your body.

"Yes baby," you panted, so Aaron sped up a little, his lips curling into a grin as you shook, your legs wiggling with a mind of their own. Aaron yanked his shirt over his head and disappeared between your thighs, sucking your clit between his lips, causing your back to arch immediately. Aaron's tongue was relentless against you, the orgasms becoming more powerful as time passed by. Aaron loved seeing you like this, your eyes glassy, lips pouty and swollen as you stared down at him.

Aaron would never get tired of pleasuring you—it was something that he quite literally ached to do. His mind ran rampant with thoughts of how he could fuck you, new things he could try with his tongue to keep you satisfied. He wasn't typically the kind of man to try new things, but late at night when he was away from you, he'd browse the internet for things that he'd never expected to enjoy, making a mental list of things he could introduce to you.

Aaron's mouth worked tirelessly against you, and soon enough he was coating his finger in your arousal so he could slip it into you, curling it perfectly against your sweet spot. You saw stars as his finger pumped into you and his tongue swirled around your clit, your hands falling to his hair out of reflex. He whimpered as you tugged lightly at his hair, so you peered down to make sure what you'd done was okay. You hadn't expected him to be looking back at you, his cheeks tinted red, his lips glistening in the lamp light.

"Do that again," he hissed, so you pulled a little bit harder and he nodded, licking his lips before he reattached them to your core. He was always so content between your legs; you could only lay back and enjoy him in all of his perfection, baffled that you had such an attentive, loving man.

Aaron had lost count of how many times you'd came on his tongue; he wasn't sure any amount would ever be enough to satisfy his hunger for you. He'd been busy so long that when he glanced to his left, he noticed the sky changing from a dusky purple to a kaleidoscope of pinks and oranges. He chuckled lowly as he came up on his knees, nodding to the window so you could see too.

"I want to be inside of you as the sun comes up," he whispered, taking his time pressing into you. He was always so patient with you, giving you plenty of time to adjust to his massive member—you'd never get used to the way he felt when he first slid into you. His hand found yours as he leaned forward, pressing a kiss to your lips as his hips began to move. You were finally to the point that there wasn't a single moment of being uncomfortable anymore—it was all pleasure now. You were amazed how he could always make you feel like you were on top of the world; it was a feeling you never expected to go away.

"You're perfect, baby. You make me feel complete," he told you before his lips connected with yours, possessive but so tender—it made your heart swell ten sizes.

"I hope you stay forever," you said through clenched teeth as you found your high, Aaron's lips pressing kisses along your neck and jaw as he fucked you through your orgasm. You could tell by the way his pace had quickened slightly that he was close, seconds away from his own release. You held his face in your hands, making sure he was looking right at you.

"Fill me up, Aaron, please," you begged, and Aaron came with a shudder as soon as the words left your mouth. Your sensual words were music to his ears, and he hoped the more time you spent being intimate together, the more open you'd be. You were still getting the hang of things now, trying to figure out what you liked, what felt good. Aaron was glad that it was him to be able to help you through it all.

The sun crept over the horizon just as he slid out of you and got you cleaned up. For a moment he just stood and watched until you wrapped your arms around his waist from behind, kissing the middle of his back.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" You said, admiring the colors of the morning sky, something you usually missed because you were asleep.

"It is. I'm glad I got to see it with you," he turned to kiss you, letting you wrap up in the covers before he came to join you. He knew he'd be exhausted later, that the two of you would have a hard time sleeping now that the sun was out, but he didn't regret a minute of it, not when you were by his side for it.

Join the tag list here!

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[atrueneutral]

I have been unfathomably OBSESSED with your writing ever since discovering you on AO3. I'm curious how you cultivated your vocabulary because I am so god awful at remembering words while writing. You have inspired me to take a stab at the devil and I fear my words may fall short in the process of writing. (I owe you my life btw, your writing got me through exam week. May both sides of your pillow always remain cold.)

First off, I'm elated I could be there for you when you needed me most - exam week! I hope you got the best scores with help from Raphael and Tav.

Second off, thank you!! 😊

As for your question, it would be nice if I could type out 'I cultivate my words through reading. I read so much, let me tell you!' but that would be a lie. :( These days, any reading done is me engulfing any fics that pique my interest for my latest fixation, and I'm not even doing that anymore because I'm focusing more on writing.

I enjoy watching period films and tv shows, so I'm sure some of my word retention comes from there.

I think the true answer is I throw myself at the feet of Word Hippo. It's an online thesaurus that I always have open in another window next to my word document. I heavily try to avoid using the same words too much in the same chapter, so that's where the cute, pink hippo comes in to remind me that 'there's another and a better word for this - maybe 'imbibing' will work. Then that word is soaked up into my sponge of a brain for future use.

(I should not be giving advice) but my advice for those who use a thesaurus is to select words that add to the flow, not detract from it. Don't over-complicate your sentences by picking a fancy, intellectual sounding synonym for the sake of the word not being 'drink'.

Lastly, yes! Be like Tav, and take a stab at the Devil! Do it!

I (lovingly) scream at you all: give life to the ideas swimming around in your head!

[queen-of-my-goofball-army]

Hoshina watches A Mighty Wind/This Is Spinal Tap

So this is seriously one of the most self indulgent things that I've ever written, as well as one of the most like me OCs that I've ever created because this man has ruined my entire life. It has not been the same for over a month now and my writing while not the best and won't make hardly any sense if you haven't watched either of these movies (to which if you haven't please, please do. I grew up with A Mighty Wind and it's one of my favorite comfort movies and comfort hyper fixations) this whole thing started when I rewatched A Mighty Wind the other night for family movie night and I just couldn't get the idea out of my head of Hoshina watching my favorite movies with me so this fic was born! If you guys like it I'll do a lot of my other favorite movies as well. I have a lot of favorite movies so this might be an ongoing thing for a little while but I'm genuinely happy with how this turned out for the first thing that I'm posting in.. a hot minute for my writing so it might not be my best and it might be super niche but I had a lot of fun with it.

Dot Saito pulled back from her desk and sighed heavily stretching out the kinks in her neck with a small smile on her face. Brandon looked over at his friend with a small smile on his face. 

“Are you going to have movie night with the vice captain tonight? You guys have been doing that quite a bit recently, why’d you start doing that?” Dot flushed a light pink and tried to come up with a valid reason since the only one that she had was that she liked spending time with the vice captain and he hadn’t seen hardly any movies. So as a movie nerd that made way too many references to her favorite movies when she was growing up that she’d watch with her parents during movie nights.

“I just like talking with him he’s really nice and I like hearing his laugh at things that I find funny. That was the reason that I started showing him my favorite movies when I was a little kid. Tonight we’re doing a mockumentary double feature of A Mighty Wind and This Is Spinal Tap. I think that he’s going to prefer This Is Spinal Tap honestly but I prefer A Mighty Wind because it was my first one that my dad showed me when I was a kid.” Brandon chuckled a little bit at the fact that Dot always was the first to defend herself against the feelings that she had for their vice captain. 

“You know you don’t work directly under him. We work under captain Ashido so you could tell him how you feel and nothing would be bad about it. Besides, he thinks that you’re beautiful just trust me on that.” Dot shook her head animatedly putting her things into her satchel and sighing heavily looking at her friend. 

“Please just.. don’t okay Brandon? I don’t want to talk about it it’s not something that I like talking about. I know that it’s pathetic and that I totally dug my own grave by showing him my favorite movies but I couldn’t help it. He never judges me for liking something and I’ve had too many people over the years judge me for my favorite things so forgive me if I’d rather enjoy this while it lasts.” Brandon smiled sadly at his friend putting his hand onto her shoulder since he knew that she had loved and lost a lot of people in her life.

“I just don’t see the point in denying yourself happiness when he’s right there and wants to spend all of his free time with you. Besides you’re not exactly subtle and you’re always staring at him anyways so he’s bound to notice that at some point or he probably already has.” Dot sighed heavily since she had a good idea that he had already noticed how generally pathetic she was when it came to him.

“I’ve got to get going I’ll see you tomorrow Brandon try to not get into too much trouble without me around okay?” Brandon shrugged his shoulders seeing the small wistful smile on her face as she went down the stairs towards her dorm room where she kept her television and her movies that she was planning on showing her friend. They only did this once a week every Friday but it was what made Friday her favorite day of the week because she got to show off her favorite movies. And these movies were ones that she had grown up with and she loved getting to rewatch them. Soshiro Hoshina saw Dot go skipping down the stairs from Captain Ashiro’s operations division and he couldn’t help but laugh a little bit at her antics mostly just because she was so cute when she got happy about her favorite things. 

“You excited about movie night Saito?” Dot nodded her head animatedly unlocking her dorm room door and Hoshina went inside smiling softly at all the pictures that Dot had of her family and her friends that she had made here. 

“I am actually! It’s going to be a double feature tonight hence why I wanted to start it earlier than usual. These are two very specific movies that I grew up watching probably way too young. They have a lot of adult jokes and sexual references but my dad he loved the music in them. Said that even though they were parodies of that musical genre that they didn’t really have to be as good as they were. We had a never ending debate of which one we liked more because we both had individual favorite ones.” Hoshina listened as Dot dimmed the lights in her dorm room and he couldn’t help but feel grateful that she had always remembered that he was somewhat light sensitive. 

“You’ve definitely heard me reference both of them because they’re so quotable to everyday life to me. We’re going to start with the one that was my dad's favorite of the two of them. He used to love this movie so much that he would pick it to watch for movie night at least once a month, it drove my mom bonkers but she always let him get away with it. Now whenever I watch it, it makes me think of him.” Dot got out the movies that she would be showing her friend and Hoshina looked at them. “These are parody films, they’re called mockumentaries. They’re basically actors playing characters while acting like they’re real people. One of them is a 80’s heavy metal hairband that was my brother’s favorite This Is Spinal Tap and my favorite is A Mighty Wind about a group of folk musicians coming together for a reunion concert to pay respects to their former manager after he passes away. The music is so good in both they mean so much to me and I just find them so comforting and wacky.” Hoshina couldn’t help but smile lovingly at the rambling of his friend that meant so much to him. He never really thought that he would have the time in his life to find someone that he could love as they were but when he had started getting closer to Dot Saito and got to know her love of her favorite movies and media, he was an absolute goner.

“They both sound great I can’t wait to see them. I brought snacks as well!” Dot let out a breath of relief since after the day she had she needed snacks and just some time with her friend watching her childhood favorite movies that she still owed a lot of her adult personality to. 

“Thank you for getting the snacks I really need them right now it’s been a long week. But I’m excited to get to show you these! It’s been a while since I’ve watched either of them and I love both these movies so much.” Dot turned on the tv and got This Is Spinal Tap set up smiling softly when she saw the familiar characters on the front of the case. 

“My childhood favorite character was Nigel Tufnel something that my dad often teased me about. He knew that Nigel was one of my first fictional crushes when I was a kid.” Dot pressed play on the dvd as she leaned against the back of the couch crossing her ankles and grabbing her popcorn that Hoshina had brought with him that were candy coated. 

“Well now I’m intrigued to see what kid you was interested in as your type~” Dot flushed a light pink with a small laugh rolling her eyes at her friend’s goofy antics.

“I’m going to start regretting my life decisions in five minutes aren’t I? Mostly because you are never ever in a million years going to let me live this down.” Dot whined and Hoshina just laughed brightly at his friend grabbing his ice cream pint and he shook his head at her because he would never purposefully make fun of her for something that she was self conscious of. 

“I would never tease you about something if you didn’t want me to Saito, that’s not the kind of person that I am. You should know better than that.” Hoshina playfully pouted and Dot nodded her head with a small sigh already resigning herself to her fate that she would have to deal with so many jokes because she would never shut up about how much she loved this character. 

“Do as you will, do your worst. I can’t promise that I won’t ever come back at you though once I find out what your type is.” Dot lightly joked and Hoshina couldn’t help but falter a little bit in his teasing because if Dot ever did figure out that his type was cute girls that talked endlessly about their favorite things then she would very easily put two and two together and figure out that he had fallen in love with her but was now to in deep to really do anything about it. He’d never felt this way about anyone so he had no clue how to ask someone out or how to cope with feeling this way. 

“So none of this is real right?” Hoshina asked a few minutes in just to clarify and Dot nodded her head with a small smile on her face. 

“Yeah these are all actors playing these roles, my mom's favorite is Michael McKean he’s insanely talented, he’s the blonde one the lead singer. Nigel is next to him he’s played by Christopher Guest.” Hoshina nodded his head with a small chuckle at the ridiculous and quirky lyrics. He couldn’t’t help but laugh brightly at the the idea of the New Originals and the various other genres of music that the band had tried out. 

“The drummers all died in mysterious ways- I kind of love that! A freak gardening accident, chocking on someone’s vomit, that’s so funny.” Dot laughed at her friend nodding her hand animatedly since that had been one of her older brother’s favorite jokes.

“My dad’s a drummer so he found that joke hilarious because he related a lot to that one.” Dot couldn’t help but laugh brightly when Nigel rolled up the window on the limo to tune out the rambling driver. 

“You know I can so see you doing something like that if you don’t want to interact with someone-“ Dot lightly kicked at her friend’s legs puffing her cheeks out because even if she knew that Hoshina was right that was still a rude thing to say.

“That’s so rude! I would not do something like that. Okay maybe I would if I was really having a bad day but when I was a kid that would be absolutely something that I did to my parents sometimes if they were arguing in the car that happened a lot..” Dot laughed at the memory leaning against the back of the couch and she couldn’t help but laugh brightly the goofy lyrics to Big Bottoms Drive Me Out Of My Mind. Hoshina laughed with his friend as he could help but laugh at them along with her.

“This is actually such a unique idea for how to make a movie though I can see this being something your brother would love. Is Nigel wearing a Gumby shirt?!“ Dot nodded her head with a bright smile on her face as she played with the ends of her ribbons. 

“Yes, yes he is. He wears a couple of Gumby items. As a kid I used to think that he was autistic that was probably how I related and how I fell in love with these characters. He was my comfort crush when I was growing up I guess because I related to him and his emotions that he goes through during the movie when it comes to his relationship with David.” Dot explained with a small laugh since that was always her debate that she would get into with her dad whenever they got to discussing their movies of choice. Hoshina nodded his head understandingly since that made perfect sense to him. Dot's crushes were people that she found cute and relatable when she was growing up. 

“Okay but that’s the cutest thing in the world. That makes so much sense- he’s childish but also cares and doesn’t want things to change too fast I’m realizing that now.” Dot nodded her head as the main ‘conflict’ of the movie came into play that being the introduction of David’s girlfriend who had a lot of changes that she wanted to make to the team. 

“My dad would always joke that I would probably wind up finding someone that I would be able to share these movies with. They were really important to me when I was a kid and I loved watching them with him. Even if I asked him all the time whether or not they were real when I was a kid and I’d tell him that I wanted to go to a Folksmen and Mitch and Mickey concert, he would always say that he’d take me anyways. They’re from A Mighty Wind I didn’t watch this one until I was slightly older, maybe eleven?” Dot nodded her head since she had been a bit older because her dad told her a bit later on that he didn’t want the music to be too loud for her and wanted for her to understand the adult sense of humor a bit more. 

“I can see that though because the music isn’t the stuff that you’d normally listen to.” Hoshina noted and Dot nodded her head with a small half-smile on her face playing with the ends of her hair.

“That’s because I don’t listen to this music a whole lot, I’d rather listen to the Mighty Wind soundtrack. My dad used to jokingly call me Sissy Knox one of the characters in that movie especially once I started wearing my hair in pigtails like her’s. But you’ve definitely heard me humming the music from that movie. I just thought that you would prefer this one and I do find it really, really funny but the only thing I absolutely love about it is Nigel- oh and Rock N’ Roll Creation is really, really good. You’ve probably heard me humming that one.” Hoshina nodded his head when he heard the song since he had heard her humming that one but mainly Nigel’s verse that he had towards the bridge of the song.

“I’ve heard you humming Nigel’s part of that song before.” Dot flushed a light pink and sputtered before realizing that it was pointless debating her friend on something that she knew was true. 

“Alright alright you’ve caught me. Oh here’s something funny, on the actual album it is all in black. When I showed that to my parents we laughed about it for a little while.” Hoshina chuckled a little bit at the fact that Dot was clearly raised by people that were exactly like her. Kind, upbeat, funny, quirky, a little bit odd but always coming from this place of kindness. 

“Your parents sound like they were exactly like you. You still send them a portion of your checks don’t you?” Dot nodded her head animatedly since she did send a good chunk of her paychecks back to her parents. It was her own little way of showing her gratitude for them and the way that they raised her. 

“They did the best that they could to raise me, I honestly never really made it easily but they did a lot for me. Mostly gave me my love of film and gave me that way of expressing myself because if I was going to express myself any way they would have wanted it to be through film. They often speak fluently in movie quotes so if you’ve ever wondered where I got that bad habit from I got it from them.” Hoshina laughed at Dot’s light complaints about the fact that her parents had raised her to be uniquely herself because he wouldn’t have wanted for her to be any other way than the way that she came. 

“I can’t imagine that you were a difficult child at all but I know that they must love you more than anything in the world. I mean you are a really lovable sort of person.” Dot flushed a bright pink trying to remain herself that was just the kind of person that Hoshina was. He was a chronic flirt and loved getting a rise out of people and it didn’t mean that he found her lovable in his way, it just meant that he found her platonically lovable. That was all. 

“You say that with all the personal bias in the world. I’m onto you Hoshina.” She joked just trying to deflect and try to relax after being overly flustered but she already knew that she wouldn’t really be able to fight her feelings for much longer. She would have to come forward and be honest about her feelings eventually. 

“I do not! I’m just telling it like I see it. You’re the kind of person that would give her entire self to someone that was going through something just because they needed your help. I’ve seen you do it so I know that’s the kind of person that you are. I love that about you though and I wouldn’t change it for anything in the world.” Dot sighed heavily using her hands to cover her face as she let out a silent scream and hoped to god that she would just get through these movies alive. She could disassociate from her romantic situation tomorrow but right now she wanted to be here but she just was getting too embarrassed to be here. 

“You okay there Saito?” Dot nodded her head animatedly uncovering her face as she shook her head animatedly crossing her ankles together and putting her popcorn, pretzels, and chips in front of her deciding that she wanted to eat everything in front of her rather than focus on her unrequited love. 

“I’m good! Yep all good over here no need to worry.” Dot pressed her index fingers together but Hoshina raised his eyebrow at her knowing that she was trying to cover something up. 

“Saitoooo you don’t have to lie to me, did that make you uncomfortable? I’m sorry if that was too flirty for you to handle. I like ya and I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.” Hoshina put his hand onto Dot’s shoulder and she shook her head animatedly since really he didn’t be too flirty with her, she was just socially awkward at the best of times. 

“I’m really fine Hoshina, sorry I’m just.. tired but I do want to spend time with you. I love movie night Fridays they’re my favorite nights because they’re the only ones where you allow yourself to take a break and breathe for a little while. You didn’t make me uncomfortable could you just- go back to your spot please?” Hoshina sighed heavily going back to the other side of the couch even though he didn’t really want to go. Dot let out a breath of relief at the fact that she was left alone again where she could just be with her friend and not have to worry about spontaneously combusting.

“You don’t need to lie to me, I’m sorry that you got flustered and embarrassed.” Dot shook her head animatedly sighing heavily deciding that it was best to be as forward as she could possibly allow herself to be. 

“Okay, okay you got me Hoshina you flustered me with the praise alright? I know that I’m not that lovable of a person you just got me embarrassed that’s all.” Hoshina blinked a little bit with a small expression of confusion on his face his head cocked to the side. 

“But you are though? You are perfectly lovable just as you are. Pause the movie.” Dot reached for the remote to pause the movie and Hoshina turned his attention towards her. 

“Since you’ve joined the operations division under Ashiro things have been running so much smoother ever since then. You bring so much life and vibrancy into the space and since you’ve joined everyone seems to be having so much fun. You bring fun and laughter wherever you go whether it be with one of your perfectly timed movie references or jokes. Ever since you’ve joined I’ve found myself able to relax a lot more and have more fun. This is the highlight of my week because I get to spend time one on one with you. You are amazing whether or not you notice how amazing you are well I’ll just keep having to tell you that. And you are insanely lovable, the most lovable person that I’ve ever met.” Dot couldn’t help but smile softly at her friend knowing that he was being honest with her and that he wasn’t bullshitting her.

“Thank you Hoshina, that means a lot to me coming from you. I know that you genuinely mean that and you aren’t just telling me to try and make me feel better. I.. I like having this time with you too it’s a nice way to unwind.” Dot smiled softly at her friend and Hoshina let out a breath of relief since it did seem like Dot did believe what he was telling her. 

“I never really had the time to watch movies when I was growing up since I was just expected to train more and more until I eventually became good enough to be on my brother’s level and even then I feel like I never really succeeded on that. But getting to experience your favorite movies that you’re always talking about they make me realize just how good movies are and how comforting they can be. Especially the goofy ones like this one that can make you forget for a little while.” Dot laughed a little bit since she knew that her friend would be obsessed with this movie it was just something that was right u his alley. 

“Growing up these movies were how I grew to look at the world. They were something that I took life lessons from and how I better learned to understand people around me. Especially the second one that one was pretty much my entire childhood.” Dot pressed play and couldn’t help but laugh as one of her favorite jokes and references was coming up, Nigel trying to deal with the food in the green room and not being able to make his sandwich.

“I have definitely heard you reference that- that’s one that you use all of the time to make yourself laugh when you’re feeling socially awkward at group functions. Usually Brandon is the only one that fully gets the joke.” Dot shrugged her shoulders since if she had learned anything growing up the best way to make people like you was to be funny. To bring that little bit of levity to every situation if you did that then people would like you. 

“That’s because Brandon has seen a lot of the movies that I have so usually he does the lines with me to make me feel more.. at ease I guess? I learned pretty quickly growing up that if you make the people around you laugh then they would keep coming back for more. That was the easiest way to get people to like me and I accepted that I was the funny one that used my movie references to make other people laugh. If it meant that I blurt out a wha’ happen’ or I can’t do my work whenever the slightest inconvenience happens then that’s what I did. Those are both references to A Mighty Wind, I’ve been saying those things since I was.. probably around nine? Yeah that tracks.” Hoshina leaned his hand on his cheek getting more absorbed in Dot’s relationship with the movies that she loved rather than the movie that he should be watching currently. Sometimes that was just what happened though was he would get distracted by what Dot was talking about and would forget that he was supposed to be watching the movie. It wasn’t until he heard Dot’s bright laugh at the scene on screen that he remembered that he was supposed to be watching the movie. 

“Also the part where the stagehand has to help Nigel back up from the ground kills me Every. Single. Time. I see it.”  Dot laughed brightly at her favorite comfort character taking a handful of her popcorn as she poured some of the bag into her hands. 

“I also know that you quote the turn it up to eleven- that’s the cutest thing in the world.” Hoshina smiled softly at his friend leaning against the couch tying her hair back. Hoshina watched the movie and sighed heavily when he saw that David was bringing in his girlfriend just like Dot had told him. 

“You could see that he doesn’t want her there since the idea of change just freaks him out. Now they’re having a bunch of bickering sessions that’s awful- I can honestly see a lot of your reactions to things in the way that Nigel reacts to things.” Dot nodded her head with a small smile on her face since that had been one of her childhood favorite relatable characters.

“EXPLODING ON STAGE-" Dot laughed brightly nodding her head with a small smile on her face since that had been one of her favorite jokes. 

“That’s one of my favorite running ones! The fact that they’re just like dozens of people spontaneously combust each year like it’s a fact.” Dot sighed heavily seeing Jeanine and wishing that she could just give Nigel a hug since she had been in that situation more times than she could count. 

“I also say how much blacker could this get, none black sometimes just to make myself laugh.” Hoshina laughed brightly as the bass guitarist was trapped in the enclosure and couldn’t get out right as the song was ending and right when it opened they all went back into the enclosure anyways. 

“That’s just so funny to me, I’m sorry right as the song ends he finally gets out and has to try to get back in!” Hoshina laughed brightly and Dot nodded her head animatedly since that was one of her favorite visual gags in the movie. It had been one of the ones that she laughed at the most whenever she decided to rewatch it with her parents. 

“That’s one of my favorite visual gags in all film honestly, second only to when the woman picks up the wrong man instead of picking Chong she picks up some random dude in Up In Smoke.” Hoshina nodded his head animatedly since that had been one of their first movie nights that they had together. 

“Okay so I have a question Saito, do you think that Nigel has feelings for David?” Dot hummed in thought nodding her head because that honestly made so much sense to her and she’d always felt that way.

“I’ve always thought that honestly because he just hates Jeanine so much even though David says that they’re similar and maybe they are but I’ve always thought that they were too totally different people. They have a lot of tension once she gets there so I’ve always debated that with my parents of whether or not Nigel was in love with David and just thought that he couldn’t be with him. Because he was good until she got there.” Dot nodded her head with a small smile on her face this was why she loved watching movies with Hoshina since he always had interesting perspectives on things.

“Oh my god them getting lost in the arena- that’s so funny to me I can so see that happening to you-" Dot gasped over dramatically at Hoshina turning to face him and she couldn’t help but feel absolutely called the hell out. 

“It’s not my fault that I suck absolute ass with directions, I get confused! I get lost and especially when someone gives me complicated directions. I just need someone that’s not as directionally challenged as I am. Besides you’re my GPS so if I stay with you then I’ll be fine.” Dot lightly joked and Hoshina flushed a light pink as she called that a win for a win for herself since she had finally gotten her back. 

“Wait, wait is this where you take the no we’re not gonna fucking do stone henge from-“ Dot nodded her head animatedly since that was one of her lines as Hoshina watched the scene realizing that Nigel had written inches instead of feet onto the piece of paper. 

“Oh no that’s bad that’s not going to be good at all Saito he just wrote inches instead of feet didn’t he?” Dot nodded her head with a small smirk as she watched the scene play out in front of her. Hoshina couldn’t help but laugh brightly when he saw the actual stage performance play out. 

“This has to be your favorite song though because it’s Nigel’s song.” Dot nodded her head head animatedly shrugging her shoulders since it was her favorite song. She loved it because it was something that was purely Nigel’s creativity. 

“It is my favorite because it’s something that was purely Nigel. I love that scene it’s so funny and quirky.” Dot couldn’t help but feel the rage when David insulted Nigel’s intelligence and it always made her irritated. Even though they were just characters played by actors she always felt insulted by David. 

“I hate that he just undermined his intelligence though that hurts me probably because the two of you are so similar and I hate that.” Dot let out a breath of relief nodding her head animatedly since she’d always hated that David was so quick to undermine Nigel’s intelligence. 

“Thank you, thank you that always pisses me off and now they’re so far distant from each other because she shoved herself into that situation and I fully blame her for what happens to Nigel later on. I hate that he just called him out like that. And then right after she inserts herself into that Nigel starts losing his temper with David.” Dot sighed heavily crossing her ankles together as things started to fall apart with Nigel and the rest of the movie.

“Yeah this is exactly what happens when you get into a bad situation you start to get frustrated with everything going on and that just causes you to become more and more irritable which is totally understandable. And there he goes, there he goes.” Dot sighed heavily nodding her head since that was always something that broke her heart when Nigel left the band it always hurt her.

“Do I really react like that sometimes?” Hoshina nodded his head with a small smile on his face since even though Dot did react like that when things went sidewise sometimes she was easy to placate and calm back down again. He didn’t mind that about her that when she got frustrated she would lose her temper to irritation since he could always bring her back and calm her back down.

“It’s rare that it gets that bad you’re always easy for me to placate and bring back down. I don’t you losing yourself sometimes when things get irritating for you to handle, besides it’s rare that sort of thing happens anyways now that you can rely on your full team.” Dot smiled brightly when at the end of the movie things shifted to the tore in Japan where Nigel was back with the group. She loved this group of quirky characters more than anything in the entire world.

“I think that was actually a really good and entertaining, I love that so much the fact that you grew up with it only makes it better.” Dot stood up and she went and grabbed the other movie that they were going to watch and her personal childhood favorite. 

“Alright I’m very excited to see what your favorite one’s style of humor was like since I can so see why you loved that one so much.” Dot nodded her head animatedly turning it up a little bit so that she could hear it easier. She put up her popcorn but kept the pretzels and chips around her. 

“Wait wait, I’ve definitely heard you humming that song! That’s the cutest thing in the world  I have absolutely heard you humming that song while you’re working. The Folksmen are they your favorite group?” Dot nodded her head animatedly blushing a light pink and pressing her index fingers together a little bit embarrassed.

“They are actually my personal favorite but I love Mitch and Mickey as well but the Folksmen they’re the same actors as David, Nigel’s and Derek.” Hoshina blinked rapidly and the look of shock on his face caused Dot to laugh at him. Dot pointed out which character was played by which actor and Hoshina shook his head animatedly. 

“Sorry just give me a moment to process, that’s so weird to me holy moly. That’s amazing though that they were so good at changing their impressions. They are my favorite group, the joke about the records is a family running joke that we have definitely.” Dot laughed brightly with a small smile on her face and Hoshina couldn’t help but laugh a little bit at the fact that was just so cute. 

“I have actually heard you say that if you poke a hole it you’d have a great time.” Dot stuck her tongue out at her friend rolling her eyes at his antics since that was something that she would quote when the situation called for it.

“Ten years and thirty albums- that’s three albums per year! How old were you when you watched this?” Dot hummed in thought trying to think back to how old she was when she had first watched the movie that she grew up with.

“I think that I was six? But don’t quote me on that I’m pretty sure that’s how old I was.” Dot smiled softly as she got sucked into her favorite movie that she had grown up with. 

“That’s another song that I’ve heard you humming before, they’re so cute though. That’s adorable I can see them being one of your childhood favorites too.” Hoshina noticed about the romantic duo and she nodded her head with a small smile on her face. 

“They were one of my favorite sad romances when I was growing up. They don’t wind up together but it’s okay because they’ll always care about each other. They cared about each other but sometimes loving someone isn’t enough.” Dot reasoned looking over at her friend and smiling softly at him as she ran her hand through her hair putting her snacks away.

“I can’t believe you were watching this movie when you were a kid but I can see that. Did you ever think that these were real bands?” Dot rubbed the back of her neck a little bit with a small smile on her face as she pressed her index fingers together. 

“Um yes? Whenever I would watch this movie when I was a kid I would ask my dad when the Folksmen and Mitch and Mickey would be near us and he would always tell me that they weren’t a real actual band. That these were just actors interacting off of each other and playing music together. But they all learned how to play these instruments and they all sang these songs.” Hoshina nodded his head looking at the movie in front of him and seeing the way that Mitch and Mickey interacted off of each other.

“I love that though even though they’re not on good terms really they’re still coming back together to make this work. Wait this is where you took dessert talk from?!” Dot nodded her head with a small laugh rubbing the back of her neck a little bit. 

“It is where I took this might be good dessert talk from, I always thought that was so funny. She’s one of my favorite characters in this, remember her from Beetlejuice? If I’m not allowed to express myself I will go insane and I will take you with me!” Dot interpreted and Hoshina couldn’t help but laugh openly since he totally remembered her now he thought that voice felt familiar but he couldn’t place it really.

“Their love story is so sweet though I can see them being one of your childhood favorites when it comes to your favorite things. He’s so intense though and I can see why that would be a lot for someone to deal with.” Dot nodded her head and she started singing under her breath as it changed to Never Did No Wanderin’ since that had been one of favorite songs growing especially the version that The Folksmen did. 

“WAIT that’s where you took Now-Tro from?!” Dot nodded her head animatedly with a bright smile since this was her favorite role of that actor.

“It is actually where I took Now-Tro from since I found it funny as a kid. There’s a lot of things that I took from this movie because I just found it to be funny and ridiculous. It’s a comfort to me so you’ll remember a lot of lines that I stole from it.” Dot laughed openly at the fact that her friend had absolutely called her out for referencing this movie frequently.

“Sissy Knox is actually one of my favorite characters I love her so much she’s so cute. My dad often will teasingly call me Sissy Knox because he told me that I reminded him of the bright and bubbly member of the toothpaste commercial band. That’ll make more sense later on.” Dot shrugged her shoulders and Hoshina couldn’t help but laugh a little bit at the bubbly and sunshine energy that exuded from the character. Dot flapped her hand animatedly as she pointed at the screen. 

“I took so many of my references from this character, his actor Fred Willard was so funny to me when I was a kid and I just thought that he was so ridiculous.” Hoshina nodded his head with his gaze transfixed on the screen and as soon as Hoshina heard the character yell ‘Hey Wha Happen?!’ He automatically knew what Dot was talking about. 

“That’s where you took that from! I love that so much though that’s so cute, I can’t do my work too! And I don’t think so, you always say that like that I never would’ve guessed that you took that from these movies.” Dot pressed her index fingers together as she had been absolutely called out by her friend. 

“I took them because as a kid since I was something that I found comforting. I would use hey wha happen’ whenever something would go wrong around my friends. My dad especially found it funny whenever I would comedically shout I can’t do my work and he would yell back what work are you trying to do?!” Dot laughed a little bit at the memory since that had been one of her favorite jokes.

“I’m realizing something though, Mitch looks really unfocused until he’s looking at Mikey singing. As soon as she’s singing then he looks a lot more focused because he just loved her that much. And even though that didn’t work out between the two of them they still love each other.” Dot nodded her head animatedly since she’d always noticed that despite all of the mental and emotional turmoil that her favorite characters had been through they still cared about each other deeply. To her that’s what love was, it meant sacrificing some things so that the other person could be happy. And she was sacrificing a lot just so that Hoshina would stay happy for her.

“Love to me is about sacrifice if you truly love someone then you’ll let them go and be happy elsewhere even if it’s without you around in a romantic way. My parents loved each other obviously they did if they had me and they’re still together today. But I never really thought that romance was for me. I’d probably be too much for my partner honestly. I talk too much and it’s hard to keep track of everything that I say.” Hoshina looked towards his friend with his head slightly cocked to the side since that was the first time that he was hearing about that. 

“Sounds like you’re speaking from experience Saito you don’t gotta tell me about it if you don’t want to but I think that if anyone’s deserving of love then you are because you are a very lovable and loving kind of person and I think that anyone that gets to fall in love with you they’re very lucky. You’re a very unique and lovable person who would do anything for the people in your life and I think that someday someone will love you as you are. Maybe someone already does and they’re just good at hiding it because they don’t really know what to do with the feelings that they have since that’s not how they were raised.” Dot felt tears come to her eyes at the fact that she was able to read between those lines and for the first time she saw it. She saw that she wasn’t the only one that felt this way and that for the first time in her life, Dot wasn’t alone in having romantic feelings for someone. She was seen where she was and that same person felt the same way about her. Now the ball was in her court and it was up to her to say something about the way that she truly felt about her friend. 

“Throughout much of my teen years and going into my adult life every single time that I caught feelings for someone it never worked out. I wound up in a lot of.. toxic situationships because of it. Where we weren’t exactly dating but there was definitely some.. non-platonic things going on. I had a former friend tell me that it made sense that I’d never get a boyfriend because I was selfish and I talked too much about myself and my own interests. So I just assumed that I wasn’t cut out for romance because of things that people told me I guess.” Dot shrugged her shoulders pausing the movie since it was clear that her friend was missing a lot of the movie because of their intense conversation. Hoshina blinked a little bit trying to understand what his friend was telling him. Even though she had always been so kind it was clear that people from Dot’s past had taken advantage of that kindness and he felt this surge of protectiveness going through him that told him to instantly just hold her and tell her how wrong her former friend and past situationships were and how they treated her shouldn’t be how you treat another person. 

“Saito-nah Dottles, your friends that wasn’t right the way that they treated ya. You didn’t deserve to be treated that way by people that you cared about. Especially ya former friend, if she had known the stuff that you’d been through then she’d know how wrong that is especially to say that to someone else who probably didn’t ask for any of that. You deserve better and ya deserve to have someone that loves ya and accepts you as you are. Quirks and all because I- I don’t mind that ya talk a lot. I like hearing you talk about the things that you love and hearing you talk about your interests and your favorite movies. I like being with ya like this when you’re not so tense and your not so stressed out. I like getting to experience these things that you love so much and getting to laugh with ya because your laugh is beautiful. Getting to see these little pockets of yer life before I met you they make me happy.” Dot flushed a bright pink at the shortening of her first name. Nobody had ever shortened her first name like that because her name was already short enough and it didn’t require a nickname out of her name. But the fact that Hoshina had thought of a way to give her a cute nickname that was unique to him anyways meant everything to her.

“I should know because.. I love ya. And I don’t want you to have to change for anyone least of all for me. I want you to be happy instead it doesn’t gotta be with me it could e with anyone. I like just sitting here and talking with ya your my favorite person to talk to. I want to be with you but I don’t care that you don’t feel the same way that I do right now. I  just want you to know my feelings.” Dot blinked a little bit inching her lower arm and wincing at the pain that went through her arm.

“You wait- you love me? Really? You love me? Soshiro don’t mess with me I couldn’t take it off you were messing with me.” Hoshina cocked his head to the side with a small smile on his face as he tentatively scooted closer to Dot.

“Of course I love ya, I thought that I was being super obvious with how I felt about you because I always wanted to be with you and talk with ya. You’re so beautiful, cute, funny, sweet, and you’re always so bright and happy. I love ya I didn’t plan on saying anything to you since I didn’t want to lose yer friendship or anything.” Dot blinked a little bit in surprise and she reached over and took Hoshina’s hand in her’s squeezing it softly. 

“I love you too, I have since I was first starting out here and started doing my work here. Even though you didn’t know any of my favorite things I’ve had so much fun getting to introduce my favorite things to you. You make me laugh every single day and I love laughing with you, getting to watch my favorite movies and experience them with you has been one of the biggest joys that I’ve ever had.” Dot ran her and through her hair with a small smile on her face and Soshiro held her hand squeezing it with a small smile on his face.

“I never really thought that I’d find someone that I loved as much as I love you. You’re just so cute.” Hoshina lightly squeezed Dot’s cheeks with a small smile on his face.

“Stop that you nutcase- you keep squishing my cheeks!” Dot protested with kicking her legs in irritation with a bright laugh as Hoshina completely ignored her and kept squishing her cheeks anyways.

“I can’t help it, you look so cute when you get irritated like that it’s too easy to lightly tease you. You’re so precious I’m sorry I can’t help but tease ya just a little bit.” Dot laughed at her friend hugging him tightly uncaring that she was being too clingy she was just wanting to be near him right now. Hoshina blinked a little bit not expecting the hug but he easily reciprocated the hug clinging to her just as much as she was to him.

“You can press play again, we’ll talk after the movie is over I know that this is one of your favorites sorry for interrupting.” Dot shook her head animatedly grabbing the remote and keeping her arms around Hoshina’s waist to stop him from going back to his original spot. He couldn’t help but laugh openly at the idea at the ‘witches in natures color’ idea.

“That’s where you took the you’d make that conclusion walking down the street or going to the store whenever somebody says something particularly nuts! I never would have known that you took so much from this movie. You comfy over there?” Dot looked up at her friend with a small half-hearted glare that Hoshina could’t help but laugh at a little bit. 

“I would be more comfortable if my pillow stopped making so much racket.” Dot smiled softly when she heard the familiar sounds of Loco Man that she loved because it reminded her of her dad’s ridiculous antics.

“My dad loves that song! It’s one of his favorite songs since much to my mom’s protesting one of his favorite instruments is the banjo and he always thought that it was a really creative idea to use the banjo in a Jamaican style number.” Dot explained with a small smile and Hoshina nodded his head understandingly hearing the familiar sounds of A Kiss At The End Of The Rainbow a song he already knew since it was one that Dot sang a lot to herself. 

“That’s where this song comes from it’s so pretty, and just the way that he looks at her even though they’re not good for each other you can see a time when they were good for each other what that would have been good for one another.” Dot nodded her head animatedly since this had been one of her favorite songs when she was a little kid it was comforting to her and she’d use it to self soothe during storms and other times of trauma when she was growing up and didn’t want to bother her parents. 

“When I was a kid I would use that song as a way to.. I guess soothe myself? It worked during storms quite a bit since I’m afraid of thunder, still am to this day. I hate thunder or loud noises in general.” Dot laughed a little bit rubbing the back of her neck and Hoshina’s arms tightened around her protectively. 

“Is that why you always flinch when someone yells into the comms?” Dot nodded her head since even though it was a silly fear it was still one of the few things that she was genuinely afraid of either than spiders.

“I’m also terrified of spiders but you know that already due to the loud screaming that I always let out whenever I see even a tiny one in the operations area.” Dot whined and Hoshina couldn’t help but laugh a little bit at his friend’s rather adorable fear of spiders. He always was there with a quick paper towel and cup method to let the spider back outside.

“This is where you took that were you planning on studying it later, just kinda academically then- you say that to some of the younger operations people when they’re still learning and won’t read the pamphlets that Okonogi makes.” Dot cackled with a small smile on her face nodding her head animatedly since that had been one of her favorite running jokes that she’d made with her dad. 

“I also use we have one brain between the two of us when it comes to me and Brandon since he’s oftentimes the other side of my brain where he’ll be thinking the same thing that I am.” Hoshina couldn’t help but laugh a little bit since he couldn’t help but smile softly at her. He loved watching Dot bond with the other members of Ashiro’s operations division.

“I love them so much though they’re still so cute even if they aren’t together romantically anymore they’re still people that truly understand one another. I think that Mickey is the only one that truly gets him even though they can’t be together romantically they still understand each other and look at each other with so much understanding and love. I think that they’re my favorite honestly.” Dot smiled softly at her friend’s perspective as he talked animatedly about why he related to this movie. 

“I totally get that though because they were two of my favorite characters when I was a kid as well.” Hoshina nodded his head animatedly and Dot leaned her head against Hoshina’s shoulder.

“My dad and I have a running joke that my mom’s anxiety is a lot like the son’s where she’s constantly worried about every little possible thing and she hates it when we we tease her about it but I absolutely inherited her anxiety.” Dot laughed a little bit as she talked more about her family and Hoshina watched as Mitch’s anxiety grew bigger and bigger as time went on.

“Oh no he’s totally panicking that’s bad- that’s bad.” Dot nodded her head since this was how she genuinely saw her anxiety. Hoshina sat there watching until The New Main Street Singers came out and instantly Dot saw the small lines of irritation go across his face.

“WAIT they’re playing the same song that the Folksmen were rehearsing how is that allowed?!” Dot nodded head since that had always pissed her off beyond all belief despite her appreciation of Potato’s In A Padywagon for it’s goofy and silly nature.

“This is also where I stole toothpaste commercial from~” Dot laughed a little bit at her friend when Mark Shubb said the iconic line that she often used to refer to modern Disney movies.

“And there he goes he’s going for a walk sometimes that’s what works best for me though too it’s just a good thing for the nerves and the anxiety to just step away for a few minutes and get some air. My dad is the same way, that sort of quiet and soft spoken sort of person. I do love Sissy Knox’s vibe though she’s so cute even though the band isn’t the best she’s so cute.” Dot laughed a little bit and Hoshina fingered one of her ribbons that she tied her hair back with every day. 

“They’re going to do Old Joe’s Place though that’s one of my ultimate favorite songs it just comforts me and I often do one of my favorite jokes with my dad where I’ll walk up to him and just say just look for the busted neon sign that flashes ‘E A O’s’ and he’ll do the laugh with me. It’s just something that we’ve always done.” Dot shrugged her shoulders humming the song and tapping her foot to the beat of one of her childhood favorite songs.

“I’ve always loved to sing this song with my dad in the car too it’s just something that we’ve done since I was a kid. What do you think that Mitch is going to bring back with him on his walk?” Hoshina hummed in thought before his eyes widened at the idea that just struck him. 

“If he brings back a rose I swear to god I’m going to bawl my eyes out.” Dot laughed a little bit when Mitch came back on to the screen carrying a red rose and Hoshina’s eyes welled up with tears as Dot’s arms tightened around him comforting him.

“Her voice is so pretty though, isn’t she also Sally in Nightmare Before Christmas?” Dot nodded her head animatedly not expecting that Hoshina would remember such a simple song in one of her favorite movies. She started humming the main theme under her breath as Hoshina couldn’t help but laugh a little bit at the quirky and outlandish lyrics.

“They’re all so good at singing though even if they’re just singing this stuff as a joke. I feel like Christopher Guest is doing an impression though? He sounds like Frodo of the nine fingers and the ring of doom guy that did the music from The Hobbit and The Lord Of The Rings animated films.” Dot shrugged her shoulders since she actually had no idea if Christopher Guest had taken inspiration from one of her childhood soundtracks or not. 

“I have no clue where he got that from actually but that would be an interesting fun fact if that was true!” Dot smiled softly at her friend’s thoughts since as per usual he was thinking outside of the box and coming up with his own unique ideas. Dot inwardly cringed when she heard Mickey singing songs for her husband and she sighed heavily.

“Poor Mickey honestly I love her though she’s my favorite character. Probably because she’s so strong and so funny, she reminds me of you actually quite a bit. I know that Sissy Knox is your most relatable character but she means a lot to you. Dot smiled softly at her friend since Mickey had always been one of her childhood favorite characters and she couldn’t help but laugh brightly at the last jokes with The Folksmen.

“So it’s the Folksmen and women now? That’s actually so funny though I kind of love that honestly that’s really beautiful though. It’s a really cute and beautiful story about friendship and the support that you’ll give to your friends. Even when you struggle the people that care about you they’ll still be there.” Dot laughed a little bit nodding her head since that was always her thoughts on the movie. That relationships while complicated were worth it in the end because sometimes it brought you to a special person that would understand and accept you as you are. Speaking of being accepted as she was, she was still snuggled up to her longtime crush. 

“Hey Soshiro I um what do you want to do from here?” Hoshina cocked his head to the side with a small smile on his face as he leaned against her side snuggling closer to  her. 

“Well what I want is to take you on a date as soon as possible~ cat cafe as soon as your available?” Dot nodded her head with tears in her eyes as she smiled softly since that sounded like a dream to her. A date with dream guy and cats, sign her up for that yesterday. 

“That sounds amazing A date like that I should probably be well rested for..” Hoshina sighed heavily pressing kisses across Dot’s cheeks as she giggled at his antics.

“Can I kiss ya at least before I leave?” Dot nodded her head tentatively with a bright pink blush on her cheeks hard to believe that any of this was actually happening. Hoshina leaned in and gently kissed Dot cradling her cheeks in his hands and lightly squeezing them before he pulled back and regretfully left her arms. 

“I’ll see ya tomorrow and then we’ll organize that date for once things calm down a little bit and Captain Ashido comes back.” Dot nodded her head with a small smile on her face as she pulled back from the hug giving Hoshina one last kiss before she walked her friend to the front of her room.

“I’ll see you tomorrow Soshiro, try ad get some sleep okay? Don’t just go to the training room and train for the rest of the night. Actually go to sleep, you’re still recovering from your fight with Number 10 and you need all the sleep that you can get.” Dot encouraged and Hoshina sighed heavily knowing that there was no way that he could get out of this. 

“Alright alright I love ya Nia, see you tomorrow. You get some rest too, I look forward to our date~” Hoshina gave Dot one last kiss and couldn’t contain the giddy lovestruck smile on his face even if he wanted to. Dot grabbed her stuffed caterpillar that she had brought with her from home and hugged it tightly as she drifted off to sleep. 

[tea-key-tangled]

✨Roleplay Partner Search✨

I'm looking for 18+ text based roleplay partners that are active and can meet the following requirements:

Long-term: I am used to doing a semi-to-slow burn and have written easily into the hundreds of thousands of words with a dedicated partner.

Paragraph-Literature Style (Third Person): I can easily do one thousand words for a post but have done more during setup and a bit less for dialogue-heavy interaction. Quality over quantity but attempting to match length is appreciated.

Activity: I like to post multiple times a day if possible and would enjoy someone who could meet this pace. I'm in US EST, and my schedule is currently very open. Once a day would be acceptable as well.

LGBTQ Friendly Pairings: I heavily enjoy playing male/male, male/transman and male/non-binary character dynamics.

BDSM/Kink Friendly: I like to use Safe, Sane and Consensual as well as Risk Aware Consensual Kink if we are adding BDSM elements. I have a wide variety of kinks, so please don't be shy when asking after one!

Fandoms: The following are my preferred fandoms with the setup being Top/bottom (* is who I enjoy playing.)

Attack on Titan

Levi*/Eren

Pairings: These dynamics are what I enjoy the most when creating either a fandom or original roleplay. No preference is given to which is played and what side of the slash is top or bottom.

Human/Werewolf

Human/Merfolk

Human/Eldritch Horror

Human/Demon

Mage/Demon

Mage/Summoned

Werewolf/Werewolf

Alpha/Omega

Teacher/Student

Master/Slave (BDSM oriented)

Kidnapper/Kidnapped

Stalker/Victim

Neglected Spouse/Enamored Neighbor

Camboy/Watcher

Brother/Brother (Can be twins or adopted)

Sugar Daddy/Sugar Baby

Genres/Tropes: These are elements that I adore including in my writing when building a plot with a partner. Not everything has to be added but just know these are well loved.

Alpha/Beta/Omega dynamics

Soulmates/Fated Mates

Hurt/Comfort

Mpreg

Reincarnation

Angst

Slowburn

Fuck or Die

Monsterfucking

Soul Bonds

Yandere (Lovers don't hurt each other)

Enemies to Lovers

Forbidden Lovers

Things I Need: I love to world build and plan. The plot and characters matter over the smut but I definitely don't mind doing a lot of smut if the setup requires it (BDSM themes exploring character vulnerability and growth for example.)

Things that I Dislike: Straight up slice of life without any paranormal elements or conflict. I just find the pacing and themes too dull to keep my interest. No god-modding and please, let me know if you lose your muse or want to try something else. I won't be offended and understand, I promise!

Places: I prefer to roleplay through Discord or Email. It helps me keep track of things and stay active.

-x-

Here are some plots I have!

~Fixated~

Themes: Eldritch Creature, Mutual Obsession, Dark Themes. Possessive Love. A Darker Love.

Levi is an Eldritch God of the Void that has been masquerading as a school janitor while feeding on the students there. Eren is a new student baffled by all of the rumors surrounding the staff member, even though none of them are anywhere close to the truth. Levi is bored but Eren wants to know him more.

Hook: They develop a mutual obsession with each other. Eren is amusing at first but then has the God experiencing love for the first time. Eren and Levi fall into a dark but all encompassing love.

Additional secret: They can be reincarnated from canon to add more interest.

~Take Me Further~

Themes: Actual BDSM, Kinks, Fetishes, Dynamics and RP borrowing real life experiences from someone in the community.

Levi is a community leader of the local BDSM chapter while Eren is a brand new submissive that is eager and wants to try. This RP is meant to share and develop a unique experience with the character's dynamics and how they discover themselves and each other.

Note: Any dynamics or tropes listed above can be worked in these plots.

[egg-emperor]

To be honest, the only real criticism I have of you is that you spend way more time complaining about people not liking you or having the wrong opinions about Eggman than you do just enjoying Eggman for what he is. Just let people be wrong, man. Let go and just enjoy what you like about Eggman instead of worrying about what others think. This isn't me being annoyed at you either. I'm not. This is me thinking you'd be happier if you quit worrying about others' opinions so much.

I'm surprised it seems that way because my blog is a much more positive place than a negative one all around, I have way more Eggman love posts, analysis, concepts, writings, etc, where I just talk about what I love than I do thinking about what others think and I'm happy when I'm not being harassed over it. I think that shows if one goes through my Eggman specific tags.

I actually don't spend a lot of time thinking about what others think about Eggman. I don't even seek out online talk of him in general nowadays because I realized how negative it was making me feel. I don't search him up on any social media platforms anymore unless I can heavily filter, specifically to avoid that, as sad as I am about missing out on good things people create.

I know a bunch of my posts are counters to popular opinions but they're ones I just remember and I like to bring up for the sake of my analysis or my takes, so if that counts I guess it is a bit more than I feel like I do. But that's just me constantly being aware I have the unpopular opinion/takes/preferences and trying to help with some corrections when mistakes are made and I'm passionate about that.

I find it really hard to let people be wrong if I see blatant misinformation about something I love. I know a lot of people hate it but I really just want to help people learn the truth and understand more because I'm really passionate about it and like to get a chance to share my knowledge and help out. When people tell me they were helped out by me doing that, it makes me really happy and like what I do is worth it and they're who I really make it for always.

But I almost never come in and start directly making corrections to people unless it's in direct messages, I use my own blog instead of intruding on posts, which I feel would be worse. Despite being aware that those people who are wrong exist, I'm not making the posts for them because I know they won't see or read it if they're that firm in their beliefs. But I want to put something out there to help other people who might see that misinformation and believe it and it spreads more.

I'm not unhappy while making the posts, they're some of my favorites. But I also have hundreds and hundreds of pages worth of me just gushing over Eggman, sharing my concepts and writing, and analyzing in ways that focus on the official material without focusing on anyone else's outside opinions at all. I am happiest that way but it's definitely heavily outweighing them overall already. I think most days, my blog is far more positive than negative.

My mind does have a problem of fixating on the negatives sometimes when people mistreat me though because then it becomes a lot more personal. A lot of the times they tend to be a very vocal minority that feel like the majority on some days and I'm honest about how I'm feeling in personal posts, like I was yesterday. But I was also drunk for most of it and dwelling about being down in the dumps even more than usual which explains the burst of them lol I should turn my phone off

But yeah I get that if you come in on the wrong day it probably can seem like all I do is think about how others think of Eggman and think of me. But it feels good to get it out, it stops me from thinking about it and calms me down and posting it can potentially help others and that turns it into something happy for me. But there are plenty of things I've written out and not posted when I realize it can't help others and is just pointless negativity, though on bad days I may actually post them

But I think most of the time I think I do a decent job of not thinking about all that and I am trying to work on it more. I don't search for Eggman and have heavily filtered common words to get away from things I don't like, and many days I spend my free time just focusing on my own creations or playing the games and gushing over Eggman and forgetting about the outside world and have a blast. I do feel like my positivity still far outweighs the negative. But I am hoping over time as I improve, the negatives will decrease a bit more.

I appreciate that you're not being mean and angry about this like common hate anons and actually telling me what you think and what I could do. I'm also not trying to say I shouldn't be fairly criticized, I appreciate the honesty and perspective and always encourage it. I don't see it as that bad when looking through my blog because I genuinely don't feel that negative in my posting most of the time but now that you've brought it to my attention more, I can try to hone in and work on it more to avoid that even more. Thank you

[duhragonball]

Who is your favorite non-Sayian, non-villain character in the Dragonball series? I really like Piccolo and Tien for instance. Or do you only have room for the major players?

Probably Bulma, Piccolo, or Krillin, depending on my mood. If I show greater appreciation for Saiyans and villains, it's only because they have a greater presence in the show, so there's more for me to talk about.

Even so, I still enjoy minor characters, or even obscure ones. To give you an idea, or just because I need to get it out of my head, I'll say a few words about my latest fixation, Ivy from Where on Earth is Carmen Sandiego?

I just woke up today and somehow got reminded of this cartoon, which was promoted heavily on Fox back in 1994 while I was trying to watch Batman: The Animated Series. Carmen Sandiego is the thief from the old computer games, and the cartoon introduced a pair of detective characters to chase her, a brother-and-sister team named Zack and Ivy.

Zack is pretty easy to read. He's a computer whiz, voiced by the same guy who plays Robin in the Teen Titans cartoons, and he's basically this adolescent sidekick type. Ivy, on the other hand, I could never quite figure out. And the show is unwatchable, so that didn't help much.

Like, okay, in 1994 I was 17, and I kind of had the hots for Ivy. She kind of looks like a prototype Kim Possible, so I guess that gives younger people an idea of what I'm talking about. I think I just assumed she was also 17, but sometimes the show plays her off like she's an adult. I mean, she's a professional detective, and she seems pretty experienced, and from what I've read she has a "history with Carmen" according to the show. The implication is that she's been working this job for several years, so maybe she started when she was Zack's age and she's about 24 now. I'm just spitballing.

On the other hand, that's kind of dumb. It's a kids show, and Zack's a kid, so why wouldn't Ivy also be a kid? You see her in the same scene with Carmen and it seems obvious. She's older than Zack, but not by that much.

On the other hand, the two detectives are in contact with a live-action character known as the "Player", which sort of suggests that the entire cartoon is taking place inside a computer game, and Ivy doesn't actually exist. That would explain why no one can find a woman in a bright red trenchcoat, and why Zack is considered the second most qualified person to catch her. So Ivy could be any age, or no age at all. She's not a character so much as an avatar for the faceless Player.

Anyway, I only got this far because I looked up information on the show over the course of the day, because I had completely forgotten the character's whole deal. I just remembered the red hair and the bomber jacket. But while I was looking it up, I found out they made a whole other Carmen Sandiego show in 2019, and in that one, Zack and Ivy are Carmen's accomplices, which kind of blew my mind. Apparently Carmivy is a popular ship in that fandom, so I feel less silly for crushing on Ivy in 1994.

I guess the point I'm trying to make here is that I always admired the Ivy design, even if the character concept was frustratingly vague and inconsistent. And this is just the example that I've been thinking about today. I find myself latching onto all sorts of obscure characters, wanting to find out more about them, and then getting frustrated when I learn there's not much to be had.

And this is my roundabout way of saying that of course I like the supporting cast of Dragon Ball. Characters like Tien and 17 and Zarbon are what make the whole thing come together, and a lot of them have lore that's much more satisfying than Ivy's.

[norcumii]

And now that i'm awake, how about "Star!Alpha17" and "FlynnNReggieAreBros" for the ask game?

Star!Alpha17 is the Star to Steer By supplemental about Alpha 17, and his life and adventures hosting the symbiote Obi-Wan Kenobi. (There are SHENANIGANS! :D) Unfortunately the logical ending place for the fic is where things start up in A Stat to Steer By, which is perhaps fitting for Alpha but sad for the authors and probably the audience.

It looks like I posted roughs for the first parts here on tumblr, huh.

FlynnNReggieAreBros is the product of my cheerfully unhinged delight for Julie and the Phantoms - that show taps directly into the part of my brain that grew up on Jem and the Holigrams, so it's a brightly colored hit of pure happy brain chemicals every time. (Of course, I don't have Netflix anymore and they clearly do not want my money because I can't purchase the show in actual dvd form, the jerks. >_<)

During one of my viewings, it hit that while Reggie - the (cleancut) rocker type (as compared to the drummer's boy-band vibe, or the lead guitarist's Rob Thomas aesthetic) - is undeniably an airhead, he's wildly insightful when the plot demands. Flynn, Julie's bestie, has a similar thing where she's clearly playing up "I'm flighty and fixated on [random thing]" but it's not for plot purposes. Instead it's playing to her audience (Julie, usually) to try to evoke particular emotions and either get someone talking, or change the emotional atmosphere.

And I could just hear Flynn talking to Reggie, saying “It gets really exhausting to pretend to be stupid all the time, doesn’t it.”

Which started me chasing down a rabbit hole of how does Flynn's background (not heavily detailed) compare to Reggie's (perpetually arguing parents always on the verge of divorce); why are they like that; how does it feel to be seen by each other; etc. And I just want to write them, not as a romantic pairing but absolute bros and just...dig into the dynamics there.

Unfortunately, "oh noes, guess I have to rewatch the series to research" kept becoming "whoops, I've just watched and enjoyed it all over again, guess we'll have to try next time".

^_^;;;

One of the days, I hope?

[spyridonya]

For the Reverse Unpopular Opinion meme...tell me what you think about the other companions in Wrath, besides Daeran and Lann!

*DEEP BREATH* I focus on the good and not the bad of the following characters.

Arue wasn't quite the dream girl I had hoped for, but I still like her very much, and I'm honestly glad she was different from what I hoped. I liked her struggles to become better, I liked her sweetness to those who gave her compassion and her sheer bafflement on the occasion. My only sincere wish was showing more of a struggle in action than being told of it. I really wished her quest wasn't so black and white in Act 4, though I know such a thing couldn't be possible due to the writing of other characters.

The entire character of Camellia is ingenious. There is no redemption, there is no twist of love saving her, she's really that evil. Her characterization is perfect, she's cruel, cutting, and wears such a pretty mask. My only misfortune with Camellia is playing good female characters of either high intelligence or wisdom, so Cameilla doesn't have a chance to try and corrupt my KCs. Her treatment of Ember and Lann is breath taking in hit’s meanness. Her coxing up to a noble despite her peasant heritage and bastard status seems on point, and how she fools Sosiel is hilarious.

Ember is a charming character and I love her. I love her naivety and her innocence, I love that she's determined to do her best and forsake the gods, I love that the game allows her to be a paradox (because one of the deities loves Ember very much) but never calls her out on it because of her age and her trauma and genuine desire to help others. But... but I don’t want to take my smol daughter out in battle and I’m not giving her Hellfire Ray because that’s EVIL. ... though casting it on Baphomet and sending his essence straight to Asmodeus would be great.

Greybor is someone that I'd think I'd enjoy more if I sat down and respec his build. There's a lot of lore and crunch that don't fit with this guy. Regardless, I do enjoy him and his quips. He's very low key and while I don't entirely agree with his alignment, he's a great 'Cool Uncle' character that I should just enjoy.

Nenio makes me laugh. I really adore her kitsune form in theory, though I feel the artwork compared to her human portrait has no personality. Fan art tries to make up for that. Regardless of the portraits, Nenio zooms in with a comment or two that makes me laugh out loud, which is a total rarity in most games I play. ... And I really think she's one of the best portrayals of True Neutral I've seen. I know a lot of folks code her as autistic, but I'm not entirely sure if I agree, because poor social skills and hyper fixations are symptoms of many neruodivegant folk.

Regill is such a wonderful character. The initial impression of his design is such a whiplash from the character we actually get. At first glance you're seeing a three foot tall man with hair akin to a troll-doll in edgy black armor before you take in the details -- the character is old. Still, so much could have gone wrong with this character, and yet Owlcat nails everything. The writing takes the premise seriously enough to be intimidated, but allows enough levity to make Regill endearing, and never forgets at his core Regill is a gnome. And then Owlcat nails it all down with the perfect voice performance for him, something that could destroyed this character completely. Regill is such a high risk character, and Owlcat slammed it with a home run.

Seelah's personality is one of the best for a paladin I've seen in years! Warm, kind, and following her duties while putting goodness first. She likes to drink, she likes being with people, she likes giving people the chances that she was given - she's heavily GOOD and I adore it. I feel like her quest deserved far more thought and effort like Amiri's was given in Kingmaker.

Sosiel is someone that I don't play with enough, simply because in my first run I was the buffer and Daeran is a better healbot/blaster. However, he was exactly what was needed for Shelyn in Owlcat games after a horrific introduction with Valerie's quest. He was sane but naive, sweet and impressionable, and his faith is slowly put to the test that he fairs well in. On the surface, Sosiel would feel better in a more down to earth game when not romancing him. When you romance him as a demon, Owlcat goes places that few CRPGs do with LI who falls for someone who is actually evil, and how love can be corrupted.

Wenduag is... really good with axes and I enjoy her voice actress. I keep playing good characters so I don't get her until Act 3 and we all know how Act 4 goes. She's probably the most 'typical' character in the game for me. Woljif is a character that I might headcanon as younger compared to most! Mind, I see him as someone of age, but someone in his late teens or very early 20s because of his maturity and behavior. He's really a good portrayal of a young man who has had rough life, who has no real loyalty because it's never been shown to him, and is very aware what demons can do. Essentially he's my smol idiot and I love him.

Trevor as a concept is really neat and while his build is a nightmare, I find it eerily accurate to folks who go through war and PSTD without the help they truly need. They have so many skills and concepts inside that have gone missing due to trauma, and tapping into them without help is a challenge. On top of this, I almost feel like Owlcat is saying 'no, don't drag him through more shit than you have to' with this build. Trevor and Sosiel's relationship also mirrors Zon-Kuthon and Shelyn so well.

Finnean was really quiet in my run. :(((

Aivu is a delight, though I've heard stories that Aivu's inclusion meant that Azata got less story and more whimsy with a fairly powerful addition to the party. Regardless, when I found out that Aivu and Daeran had the same writer, I wasn't shocked. Aivu picks on Daeran the most! She really feels like a toddler which gives me the same emotinal whiplash as I get from Ember: these are my babies, why am I putting them near the soul eating demons?? I think Aivu was written so well, I wasn't sure if I should listen to a five year old girl about rushing down to do Midnight Fane, but I'm going back, taking a deep breath, and replaying before going into the Ivory Prison.

[frenchfrywrites]

i really love how you write the (mostly implied) autistic characters (idia + levi) IT MAKES ME SO SO HAPPY like heres a line i loved from your newest fic: "He takes the opportunity to talk about something else, and while rocking back and forth happily, he delves into telling you about something he’s currently fixated on"

THE FUCKUNG STIMING!!!!!!! me personally i love to rock back and fourth as a stim ITS MY FAVOTOTREEE alot of obm/twst writers kinda forget (or ignore) that levi/idia are autistic

such as idia using a speech tablet, not being able to make eye contact, stuttering, not being able to communicate well (you already knew that or whatevs) and levi being hyper fixated on that book (can't remember) and having mc as a comfort person and rui-chan (forgot) as a comfort character

sorry if this was alot i just was so happy seeing how awesome ur autism rep in your fics!!! i would love to see you maybe try seeing malleus and rook as autistic too as they are also heavily implied to be autistic/not-allistic

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ah, you're welcome and aalso thank you!!

It certainly brings me a lot of joy to write Levi + Idia as autistic, but I'm glad I'm not the only one enjoying it hehe. It makes me really happy that it makes you happy 🥰💖 I've def written some hints at Malleus being autistic too, but I'm ofc gonna add more >:) I've honestly not thought of Rook as being autistic, but now that you mention it that boy is not allistic! Thank u for this ask, it was very fun and heartwarming to read!