#small funny

[tainbocuailnge]

"the world with catgirls does not know what cats are" is the most haunting piece of arknights lore i've learned yet

the animal kingdom is in some real fucking state in arknights they do have animals but they're called fowlbeasts instead of birds finbeasts instead of fish burdenbeasts instead of cattle etc etc as well as tons of fucked up mutated bugs like originum slugs and metal crabs and gloompincers and exploding spiders, and as established they treat 'kitties' as some weird lifeform nobody on the extensive highly educated rhodes island staff has seen before but there's a cat right there on this login screen and has been since game launch, unidentified fucking thing blow it up NOW

and sometimes there's characters that are just actual talking animals instead of anthro or kemonomimi and they're some kind of immortal ancient gods and they do shit like assist the royal line of victoria for centuries (siege's lions) or fight elaborate proxy wars with each other (the signori dei lupi in il siracusano) or fuck around in the jungle piloting giant robots built by reptile girls (high priest in great chief returns) or start a rap career and a logistics company (emperor from penguin logistics) or become successful businessmen that somehow always hang around in non euclidean hell spaces and develop long running personal beef with the doctor of rhodes island (duck lord)

[maxknightley]

trick and/or treat

Cobra-Themed Walking Stick

[inkskinned]

she's singing in another room and my dog is asleep at my feet. my grandma asked me why i haven't found a man yet and i laughed. oh, you know. i like my house clean.

my girlfriend is also my man is also "my partner" if i'm in a professional setting. yesterday we went to a ren faire and a man mimed at me - you're together? and at my delighted nod, his baffled, you're gay? made me laugh. a woman with rainbow hair said i love the two of you together. you're both so beautiful it's absurd.

my dad introduced my partner as my "..... friend. or whatever" the other day. he knows we're dating. in the same way, i was never able to get my sister's husband to stop saying that's gay like it's 2008. he still uses the word fa***t, and my sister's defense of him has always been well, he's just kidding.

my lover and i dance to old music in a tiny kitchen. we judge new music together and take food critique very seriously. we watch love is blind before we fall asleep and agree that if they had a queer season, it would be bloody but also make for excellent tv. of fucking course queer people would know someone for only 2 weeks and agree to get married. what are you saying.

at a bar with friends, a man puts his hand on my wrist. got a boyfriend? and yes, i do have a boyfriend, she's amazing. i am texting her while i wander around a gas station named after geese. i am visiting a swing state for a wedding. in the candy aisle i overhear: she's actually like a lesbian it's disgusting. two teenage girls with packaged sandwiches in their hands, giggling. no literally, like. i'm not, like. okay with her being there while we're all, like, naked and changing.

my girlfriend and i tailgate, drink gin and cider out of cups. from the frat group beside us, a man corrects himself with one of his friends: bro, i mean, nonbinary entity, and it makes everyone around him laugh, myself included. he razzes his friend the same way i would have killed for at 19 years old - like nothing happened, he continues: you apply sunscreen like an alien. he does a little sassy (and fairly accurate) dance interpretation of the motion. his friend is laughing so hard they're crying.

i am lucky, i live in a safe neighborhood in a safe state. my masc passenger princess comes up from DC. i drive her for an hour to where all the leaves are a violent arrangement of color. we walk along the trails, letting autumn into our blood. in this part of the state, there's a lot of pickup trucks and trump signs. when we chastely kiss before getting into the car, i accidentally make eye contact with a woman holding her child's wrist. she looks disgusted. she looks fucking pissed.

two hours later my girl and i are eating dinner on a patio, soaking in the last warmth of new england sun before the chill of winter sets in. we are giggling and trying to talk through plastic vampire teeth. at another table, i see a young woman sit up straighter. i watch her watch us. she blushes and takes her partner's hand from across the table. shy, like the taste of evening has just become something deeper.

it's worth it for this moment, i think. my lover is still humming the same song she's been singing for four days straight and i don't want to kill her for it. her guitar is beside my bed. her toothbrush is in my bathroom. in a few moments i will make us lunch. we are lucky enough to have found each other. it is lucky enough to be in love.

[daftmooncretin]

spock’s room decor is actually fucking bonkers. The weapons??? the big red velvet curtain??? like ok phantom of the opera go crazy.

for reference jim’s room has some photos and a plant so we can surmise this is uniquely a spock being a dramatic weirdo thing

[great-and-small]

Sheep tail go down goat tail go up that’s all you need to know

[tired-needs-sleep]

i was reading a reblog notification and them mutual reblogged something else and i was like. hey i was reading that

[sorrysomethingwentwrong]

Creative Dessert Designs By Chef Matteo Stucchi

[chloesimaginationthings]

The aesthetic in FNAF 4 is unmatched..

[1930sdarlin]

(Meme made by Me, @1930sdarlin )

[crumb-crumblet-s-crumbington]

AND BUMBLEBEE !!!!!!!!

[dimsunsstuff]

I got possessed by the idea of angel pigeons

[i-just-want-to-destroy]

how to build compelling characters

[artkaninchenbau]

People keep on asking for more Baby Robin and Papadile so here is more Baby Robin and Papadile. Now never ask anything from me ever again

[eelfishez]

Snack run (Sally's hat and Jeff's hood are part of an effort to blend in ((its not working))

[edwardbonnets]

rook: *obvious flirting* emmrich: 😲😲😲🤯🤯🤯😳😳😳??????????

bonus:

[great-and-small]

Had a woman bring in her ferret for an exam and when I went into the room a second ferret poked its head out of her bag. In delighted surprise I exclaimed “oh you have two!” and she immediately responded “yes, I’m a small business owner”

Have to admit it took me a second