#since we’re still dealing with the same info as we did before

[dearweirdme]

(warning, this got way longer than anticipated sorry)

ik this is probably a dead topic to you and i apologize for bringing it up again but i was just rewatching the leaked jk videos of him in his apartment with that girl bc i saw some discourse abt it in another tkk blog’s comments. some jk stan who’s convinced he’s straight, that he was sleeping arnd/had a girlfriend, and that we’re all delusional came in the comments and basically started stirring shit lol. they mentioned they believed he was dating that tattoo artist girl who he was photographed w his arms arnd as well. but i thought she had a bf at the time of that pic being released? idk fs tho and that pic def gave off close friend vibes to me?

anyways, seeing the discourse made me go back and watch the video again and the more i watch it the more conflicted i get. like he is rlly all over her. arms wrapped all around her and walking holding her from behind like that. ofc it’s POSSIBLE that they’re just friends especially if he is gay/queer (ik that kind of physical affection is more typically acceptable between queer men and straight women than when both parties are straight). but to me for some reason it seems improbable and like that’s just an excuse to keep myself believing in tkk ? like really…we’re convincing ourselves him and the girl he had at his apartment at night alone w him are just friends when almost everyone and their mother would see that as clearly romantic and crossing platonic boundaries ? he’s THAT close, comfortable, and affectionate w a girl he’s just friends with ?

lol subconsciously i feel like im probably submitting this to ur account hoping ur response will give me reassurance that the interaction was not romantic even when it’s likely that it was. to me the video is clearly real and it is actually jungkook so that’s not at all the part that im debating about, but just the nature of the interaction ig ? like how long am i going to convince myself he’s queer and w taehyung when theres a lot that implies otherwise…

but then i think back on the reasons why i believe in tkk and that makes me even more confused lol. bc if i tell myself to just accept that jk is straight/not romantically involved w taehyung then idk how to make sense of many of tkk’s interactions either. like the kappa sweethearts tshirt is the one that rlly gets me for some reason. bc there’s no shot it was a coincidence they were wearing such a specific niche tshirt on the same day at the same time too. and why would friends wear matching literal “sweethearts” tshirts? they wouldn’t right? ik other ppl value the dream premiere and other moments more but those tshirts are so unarguable that it’s something i always circle back to. like to me saying their clothes at the dream premiere were intentionally queer coded is not something that is necessarily factually true. it’s more so an assumption after extensively digging into the background of their clothes which they may or may not have even noticed/intended. that to me could be argued as a coincidence but the kappa shirts are 100% the same specific tshirt and it was 100% the same day. that being a coincidence is less likely to me.

the other thing is the way they keep their friendship/relationship so much more under wraps than the others. but maybe that’s something we’ve just convinced ourselves of when maybe they haven’t rlly been that private/secretive abt it? idk i just go round and round in circles. i’ll come to a point where i feel SO sure that tkk are romantically together (especially with how explicit tae is w his support of the queer community) but then i’ll see some shit like that video of jk in his apartment w a girl and the whole thing gets derailed.

sorry i’ve just talked in circles atp and i could probably go back and forth w more examples for forever but yeah idk just wanted to hear your thoughts bc idk how you’re able to stay so secure in believing they are together. and i don’t think u seem like the type to just continuously convince urself of something that is delusional through confirmation bias and disregard of opposing evidence.

Hi anon!

Yeah, you probably ar submitting this because you want me to reassure you 😊 and that’s totally fine honestly. I mean, we are invested in Tae and Jk and stuff can really become complicated and confusing at times. Being confused is never a great feeling and you just want to not feel confused.

I need things to be realistic myself as well. I don’t need Jk and Tae to be together, I basically just think they are. I’m not afraid to step away from them if I feel they’re no longer together (or.. if they never were). And I will definitely let everyone know if/when I ever feel like something is off (and right after that I will hide because Jkkrs and anti’s will come for my head 😂).

To me it is all about the things I know for sure. Like Tae wearing that t-shirt for instance.. on the same day as Jk when he shot that mv. To me that is something strong and real talking in favor of them being together. Same goes for other situations: Tae and Jk at that hotel after/before Dubai, Jk singing that song to Tae, BH acting weird about them (and them alone), the way Tae constantly mentions Jk… and I could go on for a while probably. Those are actual things we have witnessed.. things that are real and when you look at the whole of it.. things that are consistent and that we have witnessed for a prolonged duration of time.

When I look at the footage of supposedly Jk with that girl, I see a person backhugging a girl for a real short amount of time. I have no context, I have no clue about there being more people or not. I can also clearly see that the footage is manipulated. I know it was released at a shady timing, with the purpose of harming him. I know that there’s an actual platform where people who hate him gather and plan stuff like this.

So when I put what I know is true about Jk and Tae next to what I know of that footage… the scale just tips over. I do not trust shady footage more than I trust what I know of Jk and Tae. And I might be wrong.. absolutely. But I just don’t think I am.

If I had no knowledge about Tae and Jk before seeing that footage.. maybe I wouldn’t have secondguessed it as well. But, I do have that other knowledge and therefore if I see something that goes against that.. I look at what’s fed to me more critically.

I don’t know if this has settled your mind anon. Personally I always feel fine with not having all the answers, but I can also understand that can be real unsettling. Maybe try and land in the ‘I don’t know for now’ zone for a bit?

[jq37]

The Report Card – Fantasy High Junior Year Ep 17

It’s Emily Axford’s World, We’re Just Living in It

Welcome back to Fantasy High where this monster 3+ hour bombshell of an episode is dropping during one of the busiest weeks of my life! There is SO much going on in this episode that I’m absolutely going to have to speed through things to get this out before the next episode but I’ll try to hit on all of the most important points. OK, ready, set, let’s go!

We closed out last ep in the middle of downtime where we learned that Jace had a scar from being infected with a rage crystal shatter star and from there we still have a bunch more downtime to get through. Highlights!

Riz investigates the footage from the crystal cam and again has the feeling that he needs to go back to his office and check out any open-ended clues because he’s missing something. 

Gorgug tries to work on a way to harness the power of the Night Yorb’s darkness since it’s trapped in his van since they’ll probably be fighting a solar deity soon. He does mention it to Henry but not why he’s doing it. He also looks into the Cloud Rider and confirms with the Aviation Club goblin kid that it would be powerful enough to lift the Hangman (referring not to the motorcycle, but to Bill’s ship which is now Seacaster manor). 

Fig writes another Ankarna themed song and rolls an insane 37. That’s powerful enough that she’s able to commune with Ankarna in her dreams. She calms the distressed Ankarana with the paladin spell Atonement and by commiserating that both of their girlfriends are “out of town”. Ankarna calls Fig her hero and says that “She’s always known” before she wakes up. 

Fig keeps haunting Ruben's dreams but they're abjured so she can't straight up talk to him. In his dream, she sees his house in Elmville and feels rage as well as fear. She sees a glade in Far Haven Woods and a scared pre-emo Ruben which makes her think that that's where they did whatever they did to kick things off and that maybe the old Ruben is still trapped somewhere. 

She then goes full Emily Axford and–along with the help of Fabian, British Kristen, Gorgug, and Adaine–goes to Ruben’s house and FAKES THE DEATH OF WANDA CHILDA BY KIPPERLILLY. Once she’s “dead” Adaine casts Enlarge on Gorgug and throws a cloak on him so he can take her away the in the same way Buddy’s body was taken away. It’s the performance of a lifetime with a 34 but the craziest part is they know someone was watching through the window but they have no idea who it was. InSANE. Imagine if it’s just Kipperlilly watching from Ruben’s window like ???????

Finally she gets Eugenia to design a tattoo for Fabian’s bday that will let him cast Ghost Step. She’s gonna secretly tattoo it on him because sure why not. 

Kristen talks to a very stressed Jawbone who has been dealing with a lot of angry kids lately which is, como se dice, troubling considering the whole rage god situation. She downloads him on everything going on and reveals that she was gonna try to have British Kristen steal files so she can see if the addresses of the angry kids form a 24 pointed star but instead she helps Jawbone clean his office and asks if she can have the addresses. He can’t give out student info but he says he’ll check a map and see if they form a star as well as checking on Jace. Kristen tells him to be super careful because the last teacher they talked to was Yolanda, RIP. (He also mentions the Sophomore Year Hotel Cav fight as being a weird thing that happened and the murder attempt of Lydia–things that we’ve already flagged as loose ends. We’ll get back to this).

Bobby Dawn is freaking out because they can’t find Buddy’s soul in corn heaven. Kristen reveals that he’s not in corn heaven and in fact is following a new god (after confirming he doesn’t have a rage crystal). Bobby Dawn thinks he’s being punked–especially once Kristen says the new god is her god’s ex-wife–but Kristen is being pretty sincere (so sincere that Murph is melting into a puddle anticipating she’s about to give the game away to one of their least fave NPCs–imo, she didn’t give away anything game ending but she was def playing with fire). Bobby tells Kristen to call him if there’s anything he can do to help find Buddy and Kristen dips to go talk to “[her] friend Murph.” Not Riz, Murph the irl guy, lol. As that happens, Bobby goes to have a whisper convo with his wife Pam who is also there. Suspicious.  

Riz/Murph makes the connection that Lake Shimmerstone is called that because of the gem filaments that flow from the Mountains of Chaos. It's a classic "no rolls necessary" moment. 

Kristen finally checks the bylaws and sees that the major change made was that there is no longer any inaugural period post election. So once the votes are counted, whoever wins is president right away. It was a change by Mazey requested by a faculty member--they think Jace. 

Kristen checks on her brother finally and it doesn't seem like he has a rage crystal but he's pretty bummed that he hasn't been able to convert any of his friends despite being a good paladin. He's also having a little existential crisis because he has non Helioic friends who don't actually seem like scary heathens. But then he was warned that sin might be tempting. Kristen tells him that she understands and that he has to decide whether he knows himself better than their parents. She says she's always around to talk. She then does a Relaxation roll and loses 3 stress tokens! Brennan also has her roll a d6 for the Relationship track roll with Buddy and on a 6, loses her final stress token!

Like Fig, Kristen also gets to commune with her goddess. Cass says that she's trapped and the king will come to Spyre. She says her wife's "fiery hand" grasps her in death and she has to protect her from the upcoming destruction--but she can't do it as herself. She tells Kristen that Ankarna has a champion as well and when Kristen asks who Cass says she already knows the champion. Finally, she urges her to look into what Kalina said because there was to be a good reason for her saying Ragh’s name. 

I’m going to leave the bullets for a moment (largely because Tumblr gets mad at blocks of text that are too big) to say that Adaine and Fig go to Ayda’s geocache and find an insane amount of spell components which would have been super useful earlier in the year. It also has instruments for Fig including a new bass that Brennan says he’ll get Emily the item card for ASAP. Back to bullets!

In his research, Riz finds the location in the Mountains of Chaos of the Temple of the Fallen Sun where Lydia's party members stopped in their travels. 

Riz looking into the Loam files sees that the person they're after must have had some ability to stun their opponents which is probably the reason for the lack of defensive wounds. He also learns that Ruvina's festival was called the Festival of Frost which sounds a lot like Frosty Fair. 

He finds some text about something called the War of Shattered Stones which apparently took place around when Ankarna's domain changed. 

On a hunch that there is more going on with the rat grinding than meets the eye, the whole gang takes a field trip to Lake Shimmerstone and Riz finds evidence that at some point the Rat Grinders were taken here while a massive giant was fighting deadly monsters. That doesn’t make sense so they call in some rats to question who tell them that there was a giant fighting these monsters and basically leaving the killing blows to the Rat Grinders so they’d get the XP–which is mechanically insane diegetically but we’re gonna ignore that. The rats also confirm that this was when Lucy was still around. The Bad Kids think that the RG’s made a deal with this giant (who the rats say is a guy btw) to get powered up and they got crystals as their end of the bargain. 

OK, that basically wraps up downtime. One more piece of business before we head to the Temple of the Fallen Sun! Zara has a talk with Fig where after heaping praise on her, she passes along a message–the appearance of a surprise meteor shower which was arranged by Ayda and is the most romantic thing ever. I won’t recap it, just watch it yourself. I can’t do it justice. Before Fig leaves for some hot tub time, Zara asks about Fig’s evaluation and Fig assures her she already turned it in. 

Time for a griffon road trip! And strap in because this is a MEATY lore dump. Sandra Lynn brings everyone on griffons to the Temple of The Fallen Sun and Riz brings his files because he can’t shake the feeling that he’s missing something. 

They find this infernal temple littered with humanoid bones and Fig can tell with her divine sense that it's a temple to Ankarna. There is a place where Ankarna’s name was destroyed and replaced with a Ranger’s symbol that says: Do Not Enter. Fallen Temple. There’s also evidence that someone tried to rewrite Ankarna’s name but it’s not her actual name. It’s the glyph that means her but isn’t her actual name. Which suggests that there’s a group of Ankarna followers that are trying to do stuff involving her but that don’t know her name. 

Everyone who can loads up on Truesight and See Invisibility before they enter the temple. There are a bunch of pretty good Investigation checks but, in particular, Riz gets a 32 and Fig gets a Nat 20.

Fig sees a vision (and Adaine can see it too--I assume as elven oracle she can just piggyback on anyone else having visions lol) of two giantkin wearing robes with a sun emblem being executed by armored individuals wearing robes with a fiery emblem on it. This temple was built right when Ankarna's domain was changing. They’re seeing the old priests of Ankarna being executed by the new ones. 

It's clear that this temple was built as a part of a state religion--the focus on conquest and strength is very empire-y. Adaine sees some writing in Giant and casts Comprehend Language so she can read it. There’s a bunch about the War of Shattered Stone and some new stuff about the temple being built for the glory of the House of Sunstone. They walk through the temple and see all this awful equipment for torture and execution. They get the sense that this is where Ankarna was changed. Her new followers did a bunch of heinous stuff in her name to force her to become infernal. As above, so below and all. 

Adaine casts Legend Lore and Brennan basically salivates. 30 seconds later, Riz rolls a Nat 20 to Investigate his files. So we’re about to crack this whole thing wide open folks. Let’s do this!

Fig and Kristen explore a chamber and Kristen's shards glow so bright she has to wrap fabric around them so they don't hurt peoples' eyes. They realize that their goddesses have been in this room together before. It's where they got divorced. Fig sees a vision of a bunch of Cass's followers dropping their weapons and backing up slowly and then being brutally slaughtered by the new guard of Ankarna. 

Adaine's Legend Lore starts: Sunstone was the top clan of the giants and conquered all the others--Thunderfist, Hornspear, Moonspeak, and Frostblade (Lucy’s ancestors). Ships got better which meant people started mingling and so did their gods. Ankarna and Cassandra got married. Things were good for a while but the leaders of the church of Sol didn't like having two sun gods in their pantheon so they whispered in the ears of some of the Sunstone guys that maybe conquest was the way to go (this was when they started conquering the other clans).  

Clan Frostblade rose up to fight because Ruvina was so concerned with stopping her sister and at the sundering of the Cliff's of Colcath, House Sunstone was destroyed. 

At this point, Riz realizes the thing he was missing in his files and it’s the thing we noticed ages ago. The weird moment in Sophomore Year. How did Ragh get cursed so he could see Kalina in the first place? Brennan plays the clip, looking like the cat who ate the canary. Porter did “Barbarian Healing” on him. That’s not a real thing. Lay on Hands is though. Porter is the one who infected Ragh. Emily, who has hated this man from day one, is LIVING. 

Back to the Legend Lore: The sundering of the Cliffs of Colcath. Sundering as in breaking. As in Cliffbreaker–Porter’s last name. 

They start putting things together. Him telling Fig he's a paladin to his ancestors. Gorgug sees him smite a giant stone with the force that would be needed to fell a bunch of trees in the woods. Disasuding Fig from being a paladin of Cass. His connection to Jace from the start. The large figure healing Buddy? He’s big as hell and Paladins can revivify. And Ankarna telling Fig that she’s known all along. 

The Legend Lore Concludes: After the sundering at the cliffs, the remaining Sunstones changed their names (to Cliffbreaker) and went into hiding. The Frostblades destroyed Ankarna's name to free her from the corruption (but I guess that went a little too far and backfired). The name was lost but a lot of Ankarna's true followers waited for her return. That includes Bakur who the Bad Kids realize was trying to bring back not infernal, ragey Ankarna but sunny justice Ankarna. But he was stopped by her mortal followers. 

Sandra Lynn watching all of this is like, “Well shit,” and points out that if the world isn’t already in chaos they must not have everything they need yet. The Bad Kids figure the opposition must be missing the name and a successful election. The election is in four days so that’s how long they have to stop it. In one final sick fusion of bard and paladin, Fig uses a riff from her base to uncover an older image of Ankarna and Cassandra pre-corruption and then they head back home. 

(Note: This comes up later retroactively but before they leave, they also check for footprints and see recent ones of Porter, Jace, and Buddy. It looks like they teleported in.)

Kristen casts Sending to warn Jawbone that Porter is bad news and then they speculate some more. There was a question in an earlier episode about what does it actually mean that Ankarna died in the Red Waste. They figure out that it means that the last follower who remembered her name was killed there. 

They talk to Bakur who says again that he was betrayed by Ankarna’s mortal followers. He also mentions that even in her infernal state, she would refuse to grant her followers spells when they had plans to hurt her sister or wife (even when Ruvina’s followers were attacking her). 

Bakur realized that Ankarna's followers were interested in her power but not in her. Bakur also overheard conversation from Lydia's party that said that Ankarna needed to be remade in a place where a god has been borne. A god. Any god. Riz flashes back to Kipperlilly Jawbone asking where Yes! was borne. 

Fig with some help from Adaine makes a fake version of Ankarna's name to give to Porter--Bacharath written in Giant. While Fig goes to give this to Porter, Adaine is hiding outside with Detect Thoughts on and Riz is hiding nearby invisible and recording.

Fig finds Porter and tells him and she found a new god and found her name but it’s annoying because she can’t read Giant which she needs to do to rez the god. She does it really casually and acts like it’s no big deal and Porter tries to play it cool but Adaine can tell with her Detect Thoughts that he’s chomping at the bit to get that name. She makes sure that Fig crits on her Deception with a portent. He (not at all) causally offers to help Fig translate and snatches the piece of paper from her. Fig then challenges him to spar and he agrees. Brennan asks for a Con roll and when Porter stomps his foot, everyone is immediately stunned (remember the mention of the stun effect and not defensive wounds earlier). Everyone but Riz who rolled a Nat 20. So he keeps his Invisibility. He also gets a high enough luck check to feel that there is someone else invisible nearby, close to Fig and Porter (note: later, Brennan tells Adaine that while she had Detect Thoughts up, for a moment she could detect the thoughts of an invisible KP). 

The last thought Adaine gets from Porter as her concentration drops on Detect Thoughts is, “Did I lock the office?”

Porter helps Fig up and doesn’t actually fight her but it feels like they just saw Porter do a Legendary Action which is a weird thing for a teacher to do–even a strong one. Fig asks what the hell that was and Porter plays it coy, saying senior year is gonna be really exciting. Riz is absolutely not having that non-answer and Misty Steps into Porter’s office. With his high investigation, he just finds everything so back to bullets:

There’s a note where he’s intimidating Halo St. Croix (the paladin teacher) into letting him teach the multiclass paladins. 

There are MCATs signed for him to teach both Lucy and Buddy paladin lessons. 

There’s an encrypted message between Porter and Bobby Dawn where Bobby is basically saying he’s very happy for Sol to remain the ONLY god of the sun in town but a new war god? That could be OK. He also suggests Porter look into Devil’s Honey for his plan. 

There's medicine to help with a psychosomatic allergic to feline dandruff (prob Kalina related). 

There’s filo dough–the kind you use to make baklava (a honey based dessert). 

There’s a leather cord, probably used in the casting of Spy’s Tongue Curse than smells rank. 

There are tons of blenders full of whey, protein powder, and ambrosia–food of the gods. Together, they piece together that mortals aren’t supposed to eat ambrosia because it kills them. Not in a violent way–they just ascend to the afterlife. They figure that Porter is basically eating god supplements, with the intention of supplanting Ankarna and becoming the new god of rage. Explains why he suddenly has legendary actions. 

There’s some cryptic, vague communication with the Rat Grinders which doesn’t give much away but is enough to tip them off that Ruben’s house is the place where they plan things. 

With that they go to investigate Ruben’s place. Before they go, Riz sets up a dead man’s switch that will release evidence if he doesn’t stop it–just in case they get trapped or held up or something. Adaine also calls her sister so she can cast a bunch of protective wards on Fabian’s place–she’s a master abjuration wizard after all. 

Riza goes in first and disables all the traps in Ruben’s house which means they won’t get caught but the RG’s will know someone was there later. Here’s everything they find and, like the rest of this episode, it’s a lot:

Adaine finds Oisin’s workstation and most notably finds a picture of his dragon ancestor hanging out with Kalvaxus, some notes about the Cloud Rider, and notes about stealing summons from other people (remember Adaine's mephits going haywire at Fabian's party). There's also some notes about a way to write telekinetically on the inside of a sphere. They’re not sure what that means. 

In Ruben's sound studio, they find notes from Porter helping Ruben write the song Get Mad--the song he did at Frosty Fair. 

Gorgug hacks into their private servers and sees all their communications. KP insists that they only call Cass the Nightmare King and (presumably) refers to Porter as the "Big Guy". She says he wants the Nightmare King and should have her locked down sooner rather than later just as soon as she shows herself in the Astral Plane. There's also stuff from last year where KP is really excited. She says the Big Guy has been looking out for them for a while and she's hyping Lucy up saying she gets to be the champion (something we know she didn't want). KP is specifically excited that this will allow them to keep up with the Bad Kids. Jace is also mentioned as a conspirator under the acronym JSD which isn’t slick at all lol.

Kristen sees evidence of Buddy helping with a ritual and stuff about where a god was "borne" (spelled correctly) so clearly they know a lot about what's going on. She also finds out what KP wants to do once she's President: she wants to shut down Aguefort as a school forever which will nullify the protections and wards it has centered on it, the big one being that Elmville can't be moved to any other plane of existence while school is in session. They think the Rat Grinders want to teleport the whole town–perhaps to set up a divine domain. Which would need followers–specifically angry followers. IDK about y’all but I feel like being randomly teleported to the Astral Plane would make ME pretty angry. 

There are texts post Lucy but pre Buddy where they're like what are we gonna do now? There's a "We're all in this together now" vibe (like some kind of twisted High School Musical) and they resolve to "talk to the Big Guy"

We learn Buddy was chosen for the same reason Lucy was a good candidate–connection to Ankarna. Lucy because Ruvina was her sister and Buddy because of similar domains (Helio’s domain is a Solar offshoot). Also I didn’t mention this before but Buddy did *not* know what he was doing. Oisin and Ivy are joking about his cluelessness behind his back (Booooo I was rooting for you dude). 

There’s a message from Jace telling them to stop antagonizing the Bad Kids even though they want revenge which leads the Bad Kids to question what they ever did to them. 

In Oisin's room they also find a lot of stuff about dragons and an image of a fetal god being protected by the Nightmare King. Also they remember how cloudy the Nightmare King's realm was (maybe a cloud rider connection?) 

Deep breath, this is a lot of stuff and we’re almost done. 

There's stuff about the Thistulespring tree and Ruben’s song spreading the rage vibes that represent the crystals in the ground. 

They realize that Porter is probably using the Devil's Honey to lie to Ankarna about his intentions as he's communicating with her.

They see that for the ritual they needed a body (Porter), Ankarna's name, the protective storm of the NIghtmare King, and his name inscribed by the champion of the old goddess. They realize that’s why Zara never got her eval. Fig is the champion and she did Porter and Zara’s eval on the same sheet which he swiped for this ritual. He literally made Fig a paladin so he could get what he needed. Diabolical. Aguefort needs better hiring practices. 

OK. Phew. Finally done. They head out and the next day is election day. Porter isn’t at school that day which is not surprising but is concerning. They don’t see the RG’s either. After school it’s time for the big party/election at Fabian’s place. Mazey gets a booth set up and Jawbone is there as faculty to make it legit. Aelwyn has warded up the place. Fig is there as Wanda cause she’s a maniac. Adaine is casting Detect Magic continually at the voting booth to watch for shenanigans. Also Ragh shows up and he aced his tryouts! He’s gonna be a profesh bloodrush player! Hoot growl all around!

But Riz (and honestly Murph) is unsettled. Everyone’s at this party where Fabian’s victory is a sure thing? All in one location together? Rat Grinders nowhere to be seen? This is WAY too easy.  

Which is Brennan’s cure to drop the other shoe. 

Things are just like Adaine's visions...until they're not. The sky was always clear in her visions and now storm clouds are brewing. She gets a Sending spell from someone, "You didn't see the storm coming? Must not be a very good Oracle." Oisin. Suddenly, ping pong balls with runes inside of them start raining down from where they've been stuck in the unkept Seacaster manor for months. From when Oisin "missed" his shots. Telekinetic writing inside a sphere. Runes inside ping pong balls. As they fall, there's a sudden lurch. Winds kick up and Seacaster manor is flying above Elmville. Everyone rolls initiative! 

I’m not doing proper Honor Roll/Detention this week because this was such a long episode and I'm exhausted. Honestly, Honor Roll for me for getting this up in time. Detention for Fabian for not using is 10k gold allowance to have someone clean his house in the past 9 months. 

Random Notes

Gonna just stick to a few plot relevant ones to keep this brief. 

Re: Adaine not seeing the storm in the same way that the previous oracle couldn't. I wonder if that’s just a blanket thing that weather evades predictions or if they did the same thing that was done during Kal’s plan to evade that oracle's sight before Aelwyn sunk her ship.

I don’t think I made it clear but Porter def killed Yolanda according to this ep. 

Porter’s Legendary Action is able to stun someone for multiple rounds which in combat would be devastating. 

I’m shocked they never tried to talk to Ruvina at any point during the campaign. 

I am still VERY concerned about Riz being made staff by Jace and given silver. That feels suspicious given we know he’s on Team Porter Ascension. 

I didn’t get into it because it was nebulous and would have messed with the flow of the recap but there was something there about teleportation circles and the Rat Grinders continually casting teleport to make a circle and maybe that’s how they’re gonna get Elmville into the Astral Plane. Just mentioning it in case it comes up again.

I don’t think we got closure on the “where the god was borne” thing. Because borne means carried, not created, right? I wonder if Seacaster manor would count because the corpse of Yes! Was brought there by Ankarna. 

The Rat Grinders and Porter have at least 2 obstacles they don’t know about. They don’t have the real name (unless they got in since Fig gave Porter the fake one) and Fig is literally domain squatting on Ankarna’s domain. She already called dibs so any claiming will have to go through her. 

I think it’s really nice that Adaine tried to do a relaxation track for Kristen. Handshake meme, her and Riz.

Emily insisting so hard and consistently that Porter was evil that Brennan just made him evil has some real as above/so below energy lol.

[from-the-coffee-shop-in-edoras]

My knowledge of the books isn't as great, so I hope you don't mind this question. Where was Eomer during the First Battle at the Fords? Did he arrive in time to find Theodred's dead body? Was he there at all? Thank you so much!

I absolutely don’t mind, and I understand why this is something that’s not clear! The full timeline isn’t obvious even from the LOTR books — you have to supplement what we know about Éomer from Two Towers with info from Unfinished Tales, which has the only account of the battle where Théodred was killed. But the short answer is that Éomer was dealing with business elsewhere so he wasn’t part of the fighting at the Isen, and he never saw Théodred’s body — only his grave after the fact. Here’s the long answer:

In late February, Théodred was in the Westfold, which was his territory as 2nd Marshal. Scouts alerted him to troops from Isengard preparing to invade from the west. Acting on his own authority — because his dad was Not Well — he went to meet the challenge with Grimbold and their men and also sent a summons to Elfhelm in Edoras asking that he come with relief troops of his own. We don’t know *exactly* what Éomer was doing right then, but he was 3rd Marshal and his jurisdiction was the East-mark. So he had his own stuff going on, and the bulk of his men would be further away from the Isen than Elfhelm and his men were, so Elfhelm was a more natural relief choice.

The First Battle of the Fords of Isen happened on Feb. 25th, and Théodred was killed that night.   We’re not told what day he was buried, but we do know that his grave was there, with his banner flying above it, when the Second Battle of the Fords began on March 2nd. So somewhere in between, Elfhelm and Grimbold buried Théodred at the Fords, right where he died. That means this image from the movies, while lovely and moving, is non-canonical — Théodred never got back to Edoras and wasn’t buried there:

News of Théodred’s death came first to Erkenbrand at Helm’s Deep on Feb. 26th, and Erkenbrand sent word on to Edoras. That messenger didn’t make it to Edoras until midday on the 27th, which is the same day Éomer set out to track down the band of orcs (those carrying Merry and Pip, it turns out) that had just been reported in the east. There is some ambiguity as to whether Éomer heard the news of Théodred’s death before he left or not, but he indisputably spent the next few days engrossed in other urgent stuff that would have kept him from grieving or visiting the grave — he had to go track down and slay those orcs; he ran into Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli in the plains and had to decide whether to let them go; and then, when he got back to Edoras, he got thrown in jail for having acted without orders and for letting those foreigners run free in Rohan. He didn’t get out of jail until March 2nd, when Gandalf healed Théoden, and then they were off straight away to Helm’s Deep.

It’s not until after victory has been achieved at Helm’s Deep and all our heroes are on the road to confront Saruman that they pass by the Isen and take notice of the graves that are there. It’s a bit of a sore point for me that NO ONE mentions that Théodred is among the dead (😵😖🤯), but at least Éomer is thinking of him because he is the one to mention the murder of Théodred among Saruman’s biggest crimes when Saruman is trying to sweet talk his way back into Théoden’s good graces once they get to Isengard (“Remember Théodred at the Fords and the grave of Háma in Helm’s Deep!”).

Anywho, obviously the movies chose to mix up the timelines and events a bit for their own dramatic purposes, since they have Éomer arriving at the tail end of the fighting at the Fords, finding Théodred still alive, and bringing him back to Edoras before his death and funeral. It’s a substantial change from the books, but I do really like that they found a way to put Théodred in the movies and to give proper weight and notice to his death! And thanks for the question, I hope the answer was helpful!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not wanting to go on a walk and then telling the truth?

📚⛷️ for later

I (14f) am currently on vacation in the Alps skiing. For context, I have two younger brothers (12 and 6). What my family usually does is ski in the morning, have lunch, and then either ski some more or play board games together in the afternoon. Before, we used to go on walks in the afternoon but we stopped once we started getting better at skiing and got tired faster.

My mum loves to go on walks and regularly goes out. For the past few years she usually goes on walks in the morning when the rest of the family is out skiing as she has an injury that prevents her from skiing. Today I went with her as I am also injured lol.

My brothers and I do not like to go on walks. We’re very vocal about it, I do enjoy walking in the city (where I live) however and we all play a lot of sports so health is not an issue. This morning I decided to go with her and we went on an hour-long walk (It was snowing and the ground was very muddy, and my injury is worse when I breathe hard). She seemed upset that it wasn’t longer but she is the one who insisted that we go home.

This afternoon she drags everyone out on another walk. My dad and brothers were clearly exhausted (it was their first day and we had a 13-hour drive to come here) but my dad was a good sport and we all went out.

So now we’re all out walking and we keep the complaints to a minimum; obviously my youngest brother wasn’t very good at it but he sensed the tone of the walk and wasn’t too bad. After about an hour there comes a split in the path ; one continues straight and one goes directly up a very steep hill. My mom asked us what we wanted to do and none of us replied; I don’t know what my brothers did but I just looked at my dad. My mom then got very mad and said “Let’s just go home, you never want to do stuff like this” I argued that I hadn’t said anything, but apparently she could see it in my eyes.

While we walk back she was very mad still and kept complaining about how we never want to do stuff that she likes (sidenote: this summer we went on a 3-week long road trip where we went to Yosemite, the Grand Canyon, Sequoia National park, Death Valley, and Sedona; it was very walk/hike-heavy and it was largely because of her that we went). This is where I think I might be the asshole: at some point I got angry as well and said that she knows very well that we do stuff like this all the time, and why force us to do something that she knows that we’re not going to like? She has been giving me the silent treatment ever since.

Another sidenote since I’m trying to give all possible information: we always come to the same place since before I could walk, but always in winter. Mom been talking about how she wants to come here in summer a lot recently and is trying to sell it to us by saying how pretty it is and how many walks we could do.

Last piece of extra information: My mom had walked the entire valley that were in right now and back and least three times over the years ; the path was definitely nothing that she hadn’t seen before.

My brothers and I are staying in the same room at the moment so she came to say goodnight to the youngest only (this is not the right post for favoritism so I’m not going to go into that) and right before she left she looked at me and 12-year-old brother and just said that she knows that we don’t love her. I find this really childish and an immature way to deal with this.

Thank you for all the help

What are these acronyms?

[theangelshifter]

Obey Me DR Intro !!

︵‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵

About me !!

Name : Venice Lyre

Nickname : Ven

Pronouns : He/They

Age : 21

︵‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵

︵‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵

Relationships !!

Lucifer - Close friends! I admire him and his power. Basically like an older brother for me and treats me like how he treats his younger brothers.

Mammon - My s/o! He’s a sweetheart guys like— Literally love him 🫶 HES SO SWEET I CANTT

Levi - He’s chill. We’re friends and I’ll hang out in his room and watch him game and stuff. Sometimes he’ll drop a bunch of game/anime lore while I’m in there 😭

Satan - Actually chill. Like, super funny. We’re close friends too! Sometimes I hang in his room and we’ll talk about his books and stuff. We also both have a love for cats.

Asmo - He’s super touchy omg 😭 (I don’t mind it, he never does anything wrong but sometimes it makes Mammon jealous) He’s actually super sweet and he’s a good friend. He’ll drag me along to shop and test perfume. Asmo also often asks me if something looks good or not when he wears/tries something new.

Beel - LITERALLY THE BEST OMG HES SUCH A SWEETHEART. Actually like my brother he’s such a gentle giant. Sometimes when I bake things I’ll bake extra/something else for him.

Belphie - He’s cool, we’re friends. Sometimes he’ll end up falling asleep and will lean on me, especially during movie nights. (oh my god he CANNOT stay awake during movie nights to save his LIFEE 😭)

—————————————————————————

Simeon - We're friendly, but not super close since he's usually not around where I usually am.

Solomon - We're friends and we sit together in our history class. He knows more magic than me and teaches me some things.

Luke - Actually a cutie, like a little brother to me. He absolutely adores me. We bake together sometimes (and then sometimes he’ll go on rants about his problems with demons and my friends lmao 😭 “They keep calling me a dog, I am NOT a dog!! 😡 They say I get angry like a chihuahua! YOU HEAR THAT?? A… CHIHUAHUA! This is why I don’t like demons. They’re all like this, calling me a little angry chihuahua…even Lucifer! Actually, Lucifer probably does it the most! THE OTHER DAY—”

—————

Diavolo - We’re not really close, but we have a good relationship! He likes me and trusts me.

Barbatos - Same as Diavolo

︵‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵

︵‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵

World Info/Extra !!

Most of my DR follows the lore in the beginning, but father down the line the lore is more of an outline as to what happens in my DR. (as of right now, i’m currently working on the actual timeline so it makes more sense to me in my script)

Basically, the school is like a college. The school days are super short and I’ve only got three classes. I go to school on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays from 9:00 - 12:10. My classes are history, law, and spells. (in that order, too)

When I shift, it’ll be right before I make my pact with Mammon (all the way back in the beginning, like lesson 1) However, I’d have been there for two weeks and everyone (including me) has gotten comfortable and used to me being around. People treat me like a friend and I feel comfortable and at home at the school.

︵‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵

︵‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵

Backstory & Future !!

Basically, when I was in the human world, I was alone. I just lived in my apartment, went to work, came home, slept, then did it again the next day. It was NOT fulfilling at all but it was kind of my only option at that time. When I got chosen to be the exchange student in Diavolo’s program, I didn’t really complain when I ended up there. I was super confused and stuff, but kind of excited for the change.

As the year goes by, I get closer and closer with everyone and no one wants me to leave, including me. I feel more at home there than the human world. Still, the deal was that I would stay for a year, then go home. (Mammon at one point towards the end is like, “I will literally leave and go with you if you have to back. I swear I will.”) However, the week off, I end up turning into a demon myself. (HAVENT FIGURED THIS BIT OUT COMPLETELY, MAY JUST LET IT HAPPEN BY ITSELF 😰 The basics of this situation is that I had powers all along, they just weren’t apparent for quite some time. The atmosphere and surrounding magic in Devildom helped increase and show my powers, leading to me becoming so powerful I become a demon myself.) So then, I’m able to stay! :) (AHEM!! EDIT : I figured it out a bit more. It makes more sense now. If you want to read about it, click here!)

— Also, I haven’t fully finished all the lessons in the game yet, and haven’t played much of NB. Some things may change in the future based off canon lore. <3

︵‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵

[dearfriendsinhigherplaces]

hi!! first omg you are the first person i have seen with both a RDR2 and a BG3 and that's so cool me too!!

i wanted to ask about your bg3 DR because I'm redoing my script and also want to cut out the whole "parasite" scenario and/or divvy away from the main plot. How did you write your script to go around those kinds of things? thanks!!

sorry i’m responding to this late, i just seen it. this also might be a bit long lol. i’m just gonna loosely explain my dr plot, and info dump a little bit if that’s okay. (some bg3 spoilers). also i love finding bg3 and rdr2 shifters, there’s not too many of us.

so, it took me way too long to figure out a way that all of the companions could meet each other without the tadpole bringing everyone together, and i still really haven’t figured out some details yet (i’m just gonna let the dr figure it out because idk what to script).

my dr doesn’t really have a plot at first, i just live in a camp in the woods outside of baldur’s gate with my partner. me and astarion meet because he randomly stumbles upon my camp, looking for something to feed on (our first meeting plays out like the scene in the game where you can let him bite you for the first time/when you discover he’s a vampire, except at this point in my dr i’ve never met him). he doesn’t feed on me but i offer to let him stay at the camp since he doesn’t have anywhere else to go.

for his backstory i know i didn’t want the possibility for him to ascend, so i scripted that cazador’s dead (don’t know how he died, astarion doesn’t either), but when he died astarion booked it out of szarr manor, hence him running into me. i wanted him to be able to be in the sun, but there’s no tadpole so i scripted he has a ring enchanted with magic that gives him sun immunity when he wears it (he randomly found this right before cazador died). so for a while it’s just me, my partner, and astarion living in our camp together. and i shift there for the first time the morning after me and astarion meet.

for gale, I used to study magic at blackstaff academy and that’s where we met, we’re old friends. i find him the same way you find him in the game, in the portal.

i want a pretty peaceful experience in my dr with no fighting or death (i know i can’t handle it which is the main reason i scripted the mindflayer stuff out), so i just scripted we can all help people and be heroes without any harm happening. i think there’s still going to be some conflict with the emerald grove, with the druids and the tieflings where maybe we can help them somehow without fighting goblins (i want the tiefling party to happen in my dr). a lot of the details are just “figure it out when i get there, see how things play out,” because i swear scripting around the bg3 plot is so complicated.

as for how or why everyone who ends up at the camp might stay there together, all the main people in bg3 are kind of going through something, with or without the tadpole. even without the main conflict of the game, they’ve all got their own side quests for things they’re dealing with.

in my dr, all of that is still going on and everyone is trying to heal. gale has the thing with mystra and the bomb in his chest, astarion is healing from his trauma, shadowheart is coming to terms with not wanting to follow shar anymore (i’m only at the end of act 2 so i’m not sure how some things play out in the game), lae’zel’s whole thing with vlaakith, karlach still is trying to figure out what to do about her engine, etc. so even if you script out the main plot, there’s still all this personal stuff that they’re working through that maybe you could help with (unless you’re scripting all that out too which is fine).

but in my dr all this stuff brings everyone together, and it very much becomes a found family situation, especially since a lot of the companions don’t really have anyone else in their lives. my drs typically don’t have plots, i just want to live life chilling with my pals. the end goal for this dr is hopefully everyone is able to heal and be in a good place, and then maybe we’ll all move into gale’s and tara’s house in waterdeep lol. my script mainly focuses on me and my backstory, and i don’t really have many scenarios scripted so it’ll all be a surprise to me when i get there and meet everyone.

hope all that kinda answers your question. i’m also still figuring it out lol. it’s ok if you can’t get everything to fit together 100% because it will play out in your dr in a way that makes sense.

[nuri148]

Distances in AoT

Or: Yams has no idea of geography and the relationship between distance and travel times in AOT makes no sense.

PART THREE: CASE STUDIES

Part 1 Part 2

There are a lot of rides and expeditions in the story that may or may not look like insta-travel, but we really can’t tell because we’re not shown or informed of the travel times.

So I’m going to focus in the two instances that we do have enough info to infer the time spent getting from A to B: The holding of Utgard Castle and the expedition to retake Wall Maria. I’m going to do it in reverse order, too, because I, like Levi, like to save the best for last.

Return to Shiganshina

The SC leave Trost as the sun sets, aiming to cover the 100 km that separate them from Wall Maria during night time, when titans are typically inactive. The idea that travelling by night “might allow” the SC to make it to Shiganshina before dawn was first proposed by Armin in chapter 37, “even if we cannot get there at full speed.”

The RtS expedition takes place only 3 months after the cadets graduation (Connie, chapter 72). We know the winters are harsh in Paradis (chapter 40) and in all the things that went down during that time we haven’t seen any snow or very heavy clothes, so it’s safe to assume that the main action took place during the summer, and the RtS events happen somewhere from late summer to mid-fall. That means 12-16 hours of night-time (fun fact: day and night duration through the year is very similar in Tokyo and in Nördlingen).

It is stated in chapter 9.5 that, during the 5 years since the fall of Wall Maria the SC has stationed supplies in the lands between this and Wall Rose¹, but this supply chain would likely be just storage of goods, horse tack and food and tinned food; there would be no change of horses as these would need the stations to be manned and this is titan territory. Each soldier needs to ride the same horse all the way. And we know the terrain wasn’t flat and that they didn’t even ride the whole time:

So we’re supposed to believe that a group of 100 people covered 100 km on horseback in 12–16 hours, at night. It’s not entirely in the realm of impossibility—if we take that expedition as an endurance race and assume horses have been trained and prepared as for one—but it is a big stretch and a huge gamble if any of the horses becomes unable to go on. Remember, both horses and riders need to stop for food, water, toilet and rest. And if you’ve ever been on holidays with a group, you know that the bigger the group, the longer it takes to do anything.

Still, taking into account all we’ve seen, and with all the assumptions and supositions skewing to the most favourable scenarios, I could give this one a pass.

Utgard Castle

This is all taken from Manga Chapters 35-40, in case you want to read along. A quick summary of the story:

Most of the 104th are isolated in a safehouse near wall Rose under the ward of veteran soldiers, pending investigation on their affiliation, or not, with the female titan. Meanwhile, Zeke transforms the people of Ragako Village into titans. When these are first spotted “500 m south” of the safehouse’s tower, they ofc don’t know about Zeke, so they assume the wall has been breached.

An urgent dispatch (Thomas) is sent with the news to Stohess where Erwin is dealing with the aftermath of Annie SNAFU. At the same time, cadets and veterans split into groups to go alert the people in neighbouring villages so they can evacuate.

The South team does a clockwise sweep of the area, passing by Ragako (where Reiner totally tells Connie that that titan’s not his mum) and then riding along the wall looking for the breach². At night, they meet the West team, who did a similar sweep but counterclockwise.

They take refuge in Utgard Castle, very close to the wall—The soldiers spot it clearly from the wall, at night, so I’m guessing 500 m tops. It is also supposed to be more or less midway between Trost and Klorva. The safehouse is probably somewhere between Ragako and Utgard. Titans attack, and they hold the castle all night until Hange’s squad arrive at dawn and rescue them.

Because Yams had the great idea of putting timestamps in all these developments, this is where things get... interesting. And by interesting, I mean incoherent. 

I’ve adapted my previous wall map showing the places and shortest possible routes in this arc. We don’t know the exact location of any of the relevant places, so while I had to eyeball it, I assure you it’s less eyeballing than Yams did. Kind reminder, too, that IRL, actual travel distance would be at least 10–20% longer than the straight line distances used here.

Assuming Utgard is at the midpoint between Trost and Krolva, that would put it about 290 km in a straight line to Trost, and a similar distance to Ehrmich. Assuming Ragako is more or less in the midpoint between those two, that would make it about 140-150 km away from both Trost and Ehrmich. The safehouse from where the dispatch departs is supposed to be somewhere between Ragako and Utgard (orange area). So it could be anything from 140 to 250 km to Ehrmich—Thomas’ first stop. I’m going to pick 150 because it’s a nice round number.

Thomas leaves as soon as the titans are sighted. It takes him 8 hours to arrive to Ehrmich... and he arrives in Stohess 4 hours after that. I’ll let you look at the map above and let that sink in. I could say “I rest my case, your honour” and end this report here as we mourn geometry together.

The 8 hours to Ehrmich are already a huge stretch. As we’ve seen in the previous section, the Pony Express could cover only 100 km in that time (I’m going to be gracious and assume the roads between the town nearest to the safehouse and Stohess are as well equipped as the PE was.)

But then we’re told it took Thomas only 4 hours to ride the 352 km between Ehrmich and Stohess. On horseback. That’s basically what it takes nowadays by car, on the highway.

But it gets better! (and by better I mean worse). After Thomas gets to Stohess, EMA, Hange, Levi, and pastor Nick travel in a 2-horse carriage (driven by Moblit) to Ehrmich... Where they arrive 4 hours later. So we’re expected to believe that in a mere span of 4 hours, a decision was made, people was gathered, a carriage was tacked and loaded, and 7 people on said carriage covered a distance of 352 km.

From there, EMA, Hange and Moblit continue to Utgard (another 290 km) on horseback, where they get 3-4 hours later, just in time to save their comrades. Half of what it took Thomas. 1/6 of what it would have taken the Pony Express. And since the people between Utgard and Ehrmich would have likely evacuated, there might be fewer to no chances of changing horses along the way.

So either the horses of the SC possess the magical power of moving at plot speed anytime, or Yams does not even know what size he made his world, or he doesn’t give af.

Or all of the above.

FINAL THOUGHTS

I know AoT is “just a story”, like many others, and that not everything has to check out exactly to the real world. But while AoT has some supernatural and steampunk elements, these are framed in a world so heavily inspired in our own that it’s not a stretch to expect everything but the VM gear to behave according to basic geometry and physics rules.

In that sense, I believe Yams made a mistake in assigning exact sizes to the walls without taking the time to calculate how big a world would that really result in, or how long does travel take without our modern machines, or without giving a fuck that his numbers made no sense. But while he may not care about the numbers, and many reader also won’t care, some will, and call him out for it. And I’m not talking about splitting hairs, I’m talking miscalculations the size of Texas. So it really baffles me that none of his editors or publishers seem to have given a shit about it either. So much for the stereotype of Asians being good at math.

I understand AoT was a serialised manga, so maybe when you realise you’ve fucked up in chapter 2, that’s in last year magazine, but things like the wall size and how many hours it takes to go from A to B could have been easily fixed or retconned in any of the collection manga books (tankobon, omnibus, colossal) and/or the anime adaptation.

The ridiculously big size of the Walls also means that all the talk about people being cramped inside wall Rose after the fall of Wall Maria and needing to “cull” some of the refugees makes no sense whatsoever. Also, there are two or three simple solutions that Yams and his editors might have used to solve the problems that the wall size create. I might address some or all of that in another post (I need to crunch more numbers). One blunder at a time.

I guess what bugs me more about this kind of stuff is the realization that a work published traditionally, one that makes enough money to maintain a whole team of editors (both artistic and commercial) behind, turns out to be more poorly researched than many a fanfiction that someone wrote just for fun in the scarce free time their actual job, studies and/or household leave them.

Notes:

¹ I would interpret this as rather a re-establishment of supplies, as it makes no sense that there wasn’t such a set up before, at least between the main districts and towns.

² I’m going to ignore the fact that, despite both saying their villages are “nearby”, Sasha and Connie only reach them 5 and 9 hours after the sighting, as their mission was to warn all villages in the area, so they didn’t go straight home. Even with that, the area covered would mean their horses are supersonic lol.

[multiplicity-positivity]

hey, we're a newly discovered system ("newly" being kinda loose here. its been something ive (🐦) experienced for so long in my(?)* life that i thought it was normal and no one talked about it. and at least a year since properly established contact with another headmate)

we've all been participating in looking up resources and whatnot for this kind of thing bc there's words for this stuff??? and we just never knew???? but im incredibly scared by the sheer size of it all

just earlier today fell into the rabbit-hole of sys-course and it has me doubting everything. again. i frequently worry (and frequently another headmate speaks up and reminds me he can hear my worrying and its lowkey annoying to him LOL) but like. augh.. it tears me apart and makes some of the others nervous too because im so loud about it accidentally

i feel like im faking because i cant remember anything traumatizing (or anything before a specific age range really), we still function as a group fine enough, we're not particularly switchy + are often blurry, and we have really robust communication that almost sounds too good compared to the other experiences we've read.

but on the other hand... i (personally) know roughly when i formed, what of "my" actions were not actually performed by me, tug each other around over control and time management, do understand and feel the change from switching, and just. cant deny this experience. its confusing for me. but just me personally. there are other headmates who don't see any issues and are fully aware and accepting of our multiplicity.

i guess i'd just really like some positivity for alters who are confused and trying to figure things out, even if some of the others seem to have it all down

-🐦

Hi! We’re so sorry that y’all have been dealing with this!

Syscourse is honestly a nightmare. It causes so much stress and anxiety for systems and doesn’t actually help resolve differences or bring the community together. It’s mostly just the same handful of people shouting at each other endlessly, so we’d definitely recommend you and any system avoid it if they can! Involvement in syscourse can absolutely diminish healing and encourage self doubt, and it has the capacity to hurt systems in the long run!

Remember that, while trauma is a requirement for systems with DID and OSDD-1 to form, there’s way more types of plurality than just these! You don’t have to have been traumatized as a child to end up plural. It’s also worth pointing out that these dissociative disorders function by hiding, masking, or disguising trauma. Many people with complex dissociative disorders grow up entirely unaware of their trauma history. We ourselves did not think we were traumatized when we first discovered our system! Since then, however, we’ve learned that we do in fact have tons of trauma to process, along with a CPTSD diagnosis.

If you’d like to learn more about dissociative disorders or plurality in general with hopes of learning more about your system, we definitely recommend checking out our master post of resources! We’re trying to keep it up-to-date with any plural, dissociative disorder, or ptsd recovery content we can find - I’ll link it below!

Finally, we would be more than happy to write a positivity post for confused alters, headmates, and systems. We’ve queued this post for tonight at 8:00PM EST! Please keep your chin up 🐦, we sincerely hope things get better for you soon!

🌸 Margo and 💫 Parker

[teecupangel]

Thoughts on the new chapter of the web comic of ac black flag?

Thank you so much for the previous response!

(I'm glad you enjoyed our rants hahahaha)

So, I forgot to add this in the first post but if you’d like to read the official English version of the webtoon, here you go.

As for my thoughts on the first chapter, here’s the post.

Before I rant about Chapter 2, I need to talk about this:

“Hey, Abstergo, how bad did Devil of the Carribean flop that Noa doesn’t know Edward Kenway??? Did it not get a Korean release???”

It’s this guy, Noa!

He’s in the freaking trailer!!!

Okay that’s the most forgivable 'oversight' they've done so far since, you know, it did flop so maybe it didn’t get an international release. Hey, maybe it’s a ‘so bad it’s good’ kind of cult classic by now XD

Let’s get on with me overanalyzing this webtoon.

Now, I’m going to assume you meant Chapter 2 as it’s the latest free chapter in Webtoons but, for those who didn’t know, they already have more chapters up that can be unlocked. I would suggest that you wait for the free chapters instead if you’re still unsure if you’d like to keep reading the webtoon or, you know, follow Captain Edward Kenway’s footsteps after being privateer didn't pan out XD

Okay, so let’s talk about Chapter 2… (and this may be disjointed and absolutely out of order)

First of all:

Adéwalé is mentioned!!!

It would be fun if he gets some screentime on this one, maybe save Edward some time or another.

Same, my man. Same.

Edward is also searching for a lost city in the IndoChina area, supposedly a city of the Isus, and part of the Khmer Kingdom.

Considering Khmer Kingdom was a Hindu-Buddhist empire, Isus based on Hindu gods (or an interpretation of already existing Isus seen as Hindu gods) could become vital to the story (or just a cameo).

There’s also info about missing ships and I’m betting this is connected to the lost city in some way.

If this is a case of Tomb Raider Yamatai’s defense mechanism though… come on, Ubisoft. (It’s also possible it’s those masked dudes but my bet is the Yamatai defense mechanism type)

Okay. I have a problem with this one…

So… I don't think we have confirmation if he has already married Tessa Kenway in this one but is Edward fully embracing that he’s British and not, you know, Welsh? Like, is this the vibe we’re going for here? Or are we going for “Welsh is part of Britain” type of deal and Edward is just calling himself British because, sure, yeah, okay, that’s how people around here know him as? Also, everyone thinks he’s British because of his accent but he’s Welsh in my ears (and maybe it’s not as thick as Catrin-Mai Huw’s Nia but it’s at least around the ballpark of Aimee-Ffion Edwards’ Mio so yeah, he sounds Welsh to me). (To be fair, he was a privateer under the British Crown so maybe this is just me pushing my headcanon that he’s proud to be Welsh).

THE MOST IMPORTANT PART THAT IS MOST PROBABLY JUST MEANT TO BE A REFERENCE:

I’ve talked about this in the other post before BUT this is most definitely a reference to the temple underneath Alamut. Now, Alamut isn’t in Syria but I’m going to think better of everyone who had a hand in this webtoon and assume that this is not a mistake but a hint that they’re starting to look into it but don’t know the exact location so they’re starting in Syria where the seat of power of the Levantine Brotherhood was. Also, it was Edward who found the temple so this serves as a nodnodwinkwink that they’re not going to find anything and Edward would have to check it himself later on… probably. I don’t know anymore with Ubisoft.

Additional Notes for the other chapters because goddamn it, I wanna talk about some of these already. Primarily, THREE THINGS!

ONE: EDWARD’S EYES GLOW WHEN HE USES THE EAGLE VISION

And since this is supposed to be canon, it means Eagle Vision making people’s eyes glow when it’s activated is canon! I feel so validated for my headcanon.

Although it looks more red than gold but I’m still going to keep describing the glow as gold because fuck Ubisoft, I'll write what I want XD

TWO: The implication of the name Shimazu

The lead of the whole ‘let’s abduct this dude and force him to relive Edward’s memories instead of paying him and make him believe it’s for a new game!’ plot is supposed to be this ‘Shimazu’ Sei although the quotation brings into question if she is truly related to the actual Shimazu Clan, it could just be a case of the whole ‘there’s no real evidence that she has Shimazu ancestry but yeah, she actually does’ thing.

So if we go by the idea that the Shimazu Clan is part of the Templar Order, this brings up some insight to the possible Templar activity in Japan because:

The Shimazu Clan is descended from the Minamoto Clan which are pretty much composed of members of the Japanese imperial family that have been removed from the line of succession or taken out of the family itself and became nobles instead. The Shimazu Clan’s Templar ‘roots’ may stem from their exclusion to what they may consider to be their birthright.

The Shimazu Clan’s ancestor is Minamoto no Yoritomo who is the brother of probably the most famous of the Minamoto brothers, Minamoto no Yoshitsune. Why is Yoshitsune famous? He’s known as one of the legendary heroes in Japanese history (although a lot may have been exaggerated at this point) and the Shimazu Clan’s ancestor Yoritomo is sometimes portrayed as going against him which, if Yoritomo is part of the Templar Order/Order of the Ancient, might imply that Yoshitsune was an ally of the Hidden Ones or something similar. (Historically though, they were allies but that might be the whole 'the Templars have muddled the truth' kind of deal)

The Shimazu Clan having Templar ties is also important because they were part of the Western Army in the Battle of Sekigahara which is another nod to AC lore of the Tokugawa Clan and the Eastern Army being allies with the Brotherhood during that time. There was no mention that the Western Army were Templars or Templar allies but, if this ‘Shimazu’ Sei does turn out to be an actual descendant of Clan Shimazu then this would imply the possibility that some (if not most or all) of the Western Army were either Templars or allied with the Templars.

THREE: Edward fighting shinobi-looking fellas

This gives the vibe that he’s fighting rogue/turncoats Assassins from the Japanese Brotherhood as most shinobis we know of were affiliated with the Brotherhood. I say ‘most’ because the Templars have employed a kunoichi before and Fuuma Kotaro seemed to not be affiliated with the Assassins or the Templars from what I read. So… yeah, might just be shinobis employed by the Shimazu clan as they have said or might be rogue/turncoats Assassins and ‘Shimazu’ Sei is meant to be their descendants. Maybe even both???

Not a mistake but I had assumed that the way of speaking of the characters was a translation choice but this (btw, this isn’t the official translation):

The Japanese line isn’t bad or unreadable/not understandable (and the English translation is not entirely correct which I assumed they translated from the Korean line that was included below the Japanese line) but it’s not exactly in accordance with the time period. Remember how Edward would say ‘Jay-sus!’ instead of ‘Jesus’ in Black Flag? Or how they speak in certain ways that we don’t use anymore? It’s similar to this considering that this was in 1724~25.

Maybe it’s because I watched a lot of Japanese period dramas but

目撃者を殺す

is too plain in my ears. The literal translation of this is “kill the witness” not “kill the witnesses”.

For a shinobi like this, I feel that translating “kill the witnesses” should be more like this:

すべての目撃者全滅する

That would translate to “Annihilating all eyewitnesses” which has more gravitas.

The more complete line would be “すべての目撃者を全滅する” but it’s more natural at times to remove particles when speaking and this is longer, yes, but that’s usually how they speak in olden times. Since Japan is still in the Edo period, they’d still be using a more archaic way of speaking than what we’re used to. This すべての目撃者全滅する, btw, is already modernized compared to how they should normally speak but it’ll be more ‘believable’ than just 目撃者を殺す.

Or… you know… the mook shinobi is not really a poet nor a reader and I’m thinking too deeply on this.

If you’ve read up to the end, here, have a chibi Edward XD

[bisluthq]

To be fair Nat, I do think you should maybe tell your partner if you’ve slept with one of your friends 💀 I get that it’s not a big deal for you and there’s nothing there, but when that kind of stuff comes out it might feel like it was being hidden

Well yeah in hindsight I probably should’ve said it beforehand. He knew we were very close friends and that we’d lived together for a spell in uni but I didn’t think to mention we used to fuck during that period because she’s married now lol?? So it felt like irrelevant info? But then I can’t remember how it came up but it did and he’s been weird with her ever since. The guy friend who as I say we have varying definitions of sex with he always knew we’d had a thing (again it is debatable what that was and I think I’ve won the argument in the long term but anyway) but he’s a bit weird with him. My guy bestie and I had a threesome once and my bf is cool with him but as I say I think it’s like if he knows there’s literally nothing at all there he indeed doesn’t give a fuck and where it’s like a “okay maybe in another life or if we’re ever single again at the same time it’s not off the table” he gets jealous 💀🤷🏻‍♀️ I’ve told y’all about his lesbian bestie who I get SUPER flirty with sometimes because her and I have a similar sense of humor and stuff and that he and her wife are also cool with but I don’t think either would be cool if we met up 1:1 like we get mad flirty but in front of him and her wife (also she’s a butch and that’s not my thing but I still wouldn’t go for lunch with just her because we have like crossed a few lines before in conversation and I wouldn’t feel comfortable even if it just remained at the level it is now if he or her wife or both aren’t there with us because then it stops being a joke)

[britesparc]

Weekend Top Ten #621

Top Ten Things I’d Like from the Next Civilization Game

So I think I’ve concluded my reminiscing for the time being, and now I can start just plucking ideas for lists from the ether instead. Back to business as usual, fun-fans!

This is a list that I’ve been planning to do for a little while, pushing it back from a pre-Christmas slot to, well, now. And yet somehow it’s become rather more timely and prescient thanks to our good friends at Microsoft.

So, Sid Meier’s Civilization VI has got to be one of my favourite games of all time. I say “got to” because it’s quite possible I’ve played it more than anything else in the world; certainly more than any game in the last twenty years. Maybe, just maybe, I spent more time with Lemmings 2: The Tribes or Duke Nukem 3D or Command & Conquer: Red Alert; but, y’know what, probably not. Between the Steam and Xbox releases I reckon I’ve clocked up close to two thousand hours playing this damn game, and I agree that’s slightly worrisome. As such – and because I’ve played, to a greater or lesser extent, every Civ game that came before as well as quite a few spin-offs or reinterpretations of the format – I’ve got quite a lot of ideas and opinions about what works well, what works less so, and what I’d like to see from a brand new Civ title.

Considering Civ VI came out in 2017, and they’ve released about two dozen expansions for it since then, I do think we’re getting very close to an announcement of Civ VII. If I had to put money on it I’d say the game will actually be announced this year for a 2025 (or very early 2026) release. As such, I did want to get ahead of the curve, so to speak, by doing this list; the things I really want out of a new Civ. I’ve tried to be quietly realistic, here, by suggesting new features or tweaks or gameplay modes, rather than reinventing the wheel (literally or figuratively) and wishing for something that wasn’t really a Civ game.

And like I say, all this is rather timely, because we’ve recently been given an extended look at Ara: History Untold, the Civ­-inspired 4X game from Microsoft that’s coming to PC later this year (and, I imagine, Xbox consoles next year). As a huge Civ fan, I’m really intrigued by new takes on the classic formula; what a brand new game can do that wouldn’t really be possible in Civ without breaking what people love about the formula. Here we see civilisations growing and evolving on what appears to be a dynamic, living world, coping with the natural world. We’re promised a bit more dynamism; they’re calling it an “alternate history” game, so I hope that means you can develop steam-powered rockets like some kind of steampunk Tony Stark, but I imagine it won’t go quite that far. All the same, it’s interesting to see what new wrinkles they’re going to explore within a relatively similar framework. I do worry, however, that however good it is I’ll just bounce off it, like I did with the broadly similar Humankind recently, just because it’s not quite enough like Civ.

Anyway, with one eye on the competition, here, then, are my Top Ten things I’d like to see them do in the next proper Civ title. Your turn!

Better interface: generally speaking I think Civ VI is about as user-friendly as the series has been – although I do miss a little bit the days when it ran in a window. However, it can still be fiddly to keep track of everything. I think refining the controls around people also using keyboard commands or even a touch screen would be great; let us use arrow keys to navigate, make shortcuts more accessible, use contrasting colours the menus, and make it play well with a controller, too. I’m going to extend this to making sure that every bit of info you’re presented with – each turn’s new events – can be easily zoomed to and dealt with, more options automated and commands stacked.

Better diplomacy: the different leaders are always a highlight in Civ and their design and animation in Civ VI is terrific. But dealing with them is a complicated, often arbitrary muddle. Streamline this whole interface; make it very clear who’s who, what’s on the table, and what you want in return. Allow the creation of different types of alliance; I want to get dragged into a war because I’m friends with Nigeria, or something! Maybe create different dialogue options or “stances” you can adopt; I used to like the way you could force a war by constantly threatening or demanding things from other leaders.

Better religion: religion is quite a big topic in Civ games. I like the way it divorces any aspect of religion from the name or symbol of the faith; and also how your national identity can become attached to that religion. But it’s not very nuanced, and it makes less sense in the later stages of the game. Perhaps they should dispense with real-world religious references altogether, and have you begin the game by choosing to worship different pagan deities, with some kind of associated benefit? You want your cities to grow, so you worship a fertility god; you want to churn out troops so you worship a god of war. You could choose to become monotheistic, and eventually have no religion. Certainly it’d make more sense than having opposing clerics going to war in the year 2050.

More control over Great People and Great Works: the method for generating Great People organically – the more scientific buildings you build the more points you get towards a Great Scientist – makes sense. But I think they should give you more control; perhaps generating a Great Person is sort of like a project you undertake. Or perhaps their bonuses are less random; maybe they can all do certain tasks, like furthering research or aiding construction or spreading culture. The same with the Great Works, where it all just feels so random; you get points for having a museum with matching works of art, but it’s pot luck, and excavating archaeological sites is even worse. I’d love it if you could commission specific works, and trade them more readily; it’d be great if you became known for classical music or pottery or – yes – movies and TV, because I think they should allow that too.

False flags: because the penalties for starting a war can be so great, there should be more options for trying to be sneaky about it. You should be able to bribe or hire third parties – barbarians? City states? Rival civs? – to go to war on your behalf. You should be able to have small-scale defensive skirmishes without a full-blown war. But most of all I think you should be able, with a spy, to create a false pretext for war. This could be an attack on an ally’s territory or even – easier but costlier – an attack on your own civilization. This would allow you to wage war without reputational harm… unless your deception is discovered.

Individual social policies: I’ve already said how religion could be more nuanced, and so could the social or political aspects. At the moment you select individual forms of government that have associated benefits or negatives, but I think you should be able to structure your civilisation more intricately. For instance, you could dictate that you had no death penalty, or that your citizens had the right to bear arms, or you had free religion or you wouldn’t burn fossil fuel or… you get the picture. This way you build up your own form of government that reflects your idealised nation.

Sci-fi endgame: for years – decades, really – one of the big bugbears of Civ has been how the game eventually ossifies into just managing what you’ve got. Once all the exploration is out of the way there’s not much to do. So how about allowing you to construct underwater cities? Or build space stations? Basically, add about another hundred years’ worth of advancements so the end of the game feels like there’s still exploration and construction to do. And maybe give us more fantastical units, like space fighters or something.

Improve transport networks: one thing that I think is unnecessarily complicated in Civ VI is how you create transport networks and trade routes. I don’t mind you needing units to build them, but I think you should just be able to select two points and have them construct a route in between. Quite often you’re sending out traders just to build a road; I say separate the trading and the route-building. Having “shipping lanes” that can be intercepted by hostile forces is quite a nice touch; but maybe they can be generated by trading directly with other civilisations? Also, once you build airports I think you should be able to fly to other airports – including in other civs – with massive ease, making trade simpler and quicker (but worse for the environment!).

More options for districts: one big thing I hope they don’t do away with is having districts separate from cities. Not only does it look cool as you get this sort of urban sprawl, but it allows you to micromanage these separate areas. I think they should expand on this. Cultural districts should allow for the creation of “cultural assets” like works of art; scientific districts could instigate specific research projects. Perhaps different districts in different cities could specialise? Military districts have the option of defending your territory and bombarding enemies; I also think airports could be equipped with anti-aircraft defences, and seaports with the ability to bombard approaching vessels. Basically, go deep on districts and give us lots of cool options.

Tweak barbarians and city states: barbarians have always been one of the most game-y elements of Civ, and one that gets increasingly problematic. The imperial undertones of the game are made worse by having these little camps still popping up late in the game, sending forth red-hued baddies to harass you. I’m not keen on turning them into entire city states like you can in Civ VI; but maybe that’s because I’m not keen on city states in general. Large independent cities that can give good bonuses if befriended, I tend to find they just get in the way. Maybe part of the game could be trying to entice them to join your empire? Maybe a peaceful resolution to barbarians could be to get them to disband voluntarily? Or allow them to live as independent units – or even an independent city – within your borders? I’d love to see little tweaks like this, rather than still have raging baddies or massive cities stopping you getting access to resources.

[missduplicities]

Chapter 59: Family Meeting (pt. 2)

Eunha was the last of her roommates to leave the house that morning. She had a virtual meeting, which gave her enough time to prepare something to eat for her and her brother, who was still asleep upstairs. After her meeting, Yoongi asked her to call him so they could schedule their weekly agenda with Han. Finally, about an hour later, Seong Dae-Hyun came downstairs to inspect the kitchen for something to eat. Eunha didn’t notice, being too focused on the screen in her videoconference with her team to realize her brother was pacing around wearing her own bathrobe, which suited him very tight.

            “Hm, Ms. Seong?” Han interrupted when he caught sight of Dae-Hyun in the corner of Eunha’s camera.

            “Yeah?” She asked, still oblivious. Han made a move with his head, not wanting to say out loud that there was someone behind her since Yoongi was distracted by his phone. Only then, Eunha turned and saw Dae-Hyun, sitting on top of the counter, eating the breakfast she had made. “Oh, my God! Can’t you see I’m busy?”

            “Who is that?” Dae-Hyun asked, not reading the room. Eunha muted her mic and turned the camera off; Yoongi was still busy on his phone, so he didn’t notice the interruption.

            “It’s my boss, you creep!” Eunha told her brother. “Why the hell are you wearing my robe?”

            “I didn’t bring mine,” he said, as if wearing hers was the obvious choice. “Did you put salt on this?”

            “Hey, I’m working! Go to your room!”

            “Ugh, so grumpy for no reason,” he sighed, taking his plate to the living room to continue his breakfast.

            “Sorry about that,” Eunha said, going back to her team’s meeting. “My brother arrived last night,”

            “I didn’t know you had a brother,” Yoongi said, finally putting down his phone.

            “Uhm… I’m sure I’ve mentioned it,” Eunha said. “Anyway, back on the agenda,”

            “Right,” Han said, sharing the screen again so they could see the calendar. “We have the trimestral meeting in HQ this Wednesday; the Label Managers have been working on the distribution of the projects per team. From what I heard, they are asking Mr. Min and you, Ms. Seong, to work on the new debut group’s EP,”

            “I called Deku last night,” Yoongi said. “She wanted to discuss the details of the concept they have for this group. It’s pretty straight-forward, taking inspiration from early 2000s American rock bands, mostly,”

            “Do you know who is running the visual concept?” Eunha asked, taking notes.

            “I think it’s the same team that’s running Kwan’s project,” Han said; both Yoongi and Eunha grunted, they didn’t like to work with Kwan.

            “How old are the group members?” Yoongi asked.

            “I think the youngest is 20,” Han said, going over his notes again. “All I know is there are four members: drummer, bassist, and two guitarists,”

            “Make sure to ask for their brand book and concept book,” Eunha told Han. “It will give us enough info to know what we’re dealing with,”

            “Sure, count on that,” the young assistant said. “Now, going to the next point in the minute. I wanted to ask you both about your personal agendas for the next couple of weeks. It is my understanding that Jung Hoseok’s sister is getting married since you’ve both mentioned it before. Are you both planning on taking those days off?”

            “Yeah, I forgot about that,” Yoongi sighed, getting stressed with the whole wedding stuff. “It’s next weekend. I won’t be available from Friday to Sunday, but I’m planning to go back to work on Monday as usual,”

            “Alright,” Han said, blocking the dates on the calendar already. “Ms. Seong?”

            “Yeah, same as him,” she said.

            “Great,” Han blocked the dates for her, too. “There’s a shooting next week in Busan, as well,”

“Oh, I totally forgot about that,” Yoongi grunted.

“It’s the same project from a couple months, the one Ms. Seong was in charge of,” Han said. Eunha wasn’t sure if she remembered the necessary details about her trip to Busan.

            “Cool,” Yoongi said. “Send her back, then,”

            “Hey, I only went last time because you were busy,” she complained. “The team was very condescending with me,”

            “There are rude people everywhere,” Yoongi said. “You need to be firm with them, let them know you are not playing around,”

            “This time they’re shooting a short music video,” Han interrupted. “It’s supposed to be a continuation of the previous one, so…”

            “If I’m going, I’ll need an assistant,” Eunha said out of nowhere. “And I’m staying at least a couple of days. Traveling back home on the same day was a pain in the ass,”

            “We’ll make it work,” Yoongi said, trying to hide his smirk as he knew exactly what was on her mind. “I’ll need Han to stay in the office, so let’s see if we can find someone to help you with this,”

            “Oh, I have lots of friends who are professional filmmakers,” Han said, unaware of what Yoongi and Eunha were telepathically plotting. “Some of them are freelancers, so I could call them,”

            “We’ll check that later,” Yoongi said, going to the next thing to check on their agenda.

After two and a half hours, Eunha was finally free of her morning meetings. She was expected to go to the studio to work with Yoongi later but still had enough time to eat her breakfast and even grab some coffee. She had almost forgotten that her brother was in the same house until she heard his laugh come from the living room.

            “Don’t you have something else to do?” Eunha asked, joining him on the couch. “Why the hell are you still wearing my robe?”

            “I was looking for the only clean shirt I have left but I can’t find it,”

            “Oh,” Eunha said, knowing exactly which one he meant. “Taehyung needed a change so I gave it to him,”

            “First of all, gross! I don’t want your boyfriend’s sweaty body to ruin my silk shirt!” he whined. “And second, we need to talk about him sneaking into your room at night as a horny teenager,”

            “Shut up!” Eunha was not talking about her romantic and potentially sexual life with her brother. “We’re not teenagers anymore, and we’re not horny,”

            “Sure,” he sarcastically said.

            “Besides, what we do or not is none of your business,”

            “So, you are doing it!”

            “No, we’re not!”

            “You’re not?” he asked, now laughing. “You’re really not?”

            “No,” she sighed, fuming.

            “Hey, I just want you to be careful when you actually do it,”

            “Nope, we’re not talking about this,” she stood up, going back to the kitchen.

            “Eunnie,” he said, following her. “I’m serious! I don’t want you to fuck up like me. Just… remember you don’t owe him anything just because he is your boyfriend and because you love him or whatever. I don’t want you to feel pressured to do something if you don’t feel like you’re ready,”

She knew it was coming from a good place, and she actually appreciated her brother’s attempt of taking care of her. Still, she didn’t want to talk about it. She was sure she and Taehyung were not there yet. Sure, the thought had crossed her mind a couple of times, but it wasn’t going to happen anytime soon.

            “What are your plans in Seoul, anyway?” she asked, letting him know the previous conversation was over.

            “I want to see what the city has to offer,” he sighed. “I’m tired of working in Mom’s restaurant. I mean, I appreciate them letting me stay at their home and all that but,”

            “But you miss your freedom,”

            “Exactly,” he chuckled. “Besides, Dad keeps asking when I’ll recover and go back to play baseball. To be honest, I’m not even sure if I want to do that anymore,”

            “I thought you loved baseball,”

            “I do. I just don’t love the team, the city, the people around me,” he unconsciously started rubbing his injured shoulder, thinking of everything about his current life that hurt him. “After the last time I saw you, I kept thinking of how happy you looked, and good you were doing. I… I want that, you know?”

She didn’t say anything. She wished it was as simple as her brother made it sound, but to get to the point she was now, she had struggled and cried a lot. Still, Eunha didn’t have the heart to discourage her brother. She wanted Dae-Hyun to be happy; he deserved it.

            “Want to grab some coffee?” she asked.

Eunha continued her day as she had planned, only with her brother coming along, too. She was happy to catch up with him as they walked to the bus stop and answered all his questions about Taehyung and her roommates on the way to the café. She was a bit sad that she didn’t get to see James, wanting to introduce him to Dae-Hyun, but still told him all about the little Aussie kid who was friends with her. They walked together to Eunha’s office, where she gave him a tour, showing him the fancy studio where she was supposed to meet Yoongi.

            “This is dope!” Dae-Hyun complimented. “The studio I saw yesterday was smaller,”

            “Yeah, that’s where the rest of the crew works, but this is my boss’ personal studio,” she proudly said. “He lets me use it,”

            “Is that a Johny Cash Martin?” he was already on his way to grab the guitar, which gave Eunha a little panic attack.

            “Don’t! That’s Yoongi’s! That’s like the only thing I’m not allowed to use, so please, don’t!”

            “Damn, you’re making him sound like a monster,” Dae-Hyun said, frowning at the thought of his sister’s tyrant boss.

            “No, he is a sweetheart, honestly. Well, at first he might come off as a jerk, but that’s only because he is an introvert,” she wasn’t helping the mental image he was making. “He’s just very careful with the things that are important to him, like this guitar,”

            “I thought you said he was your friend,”

            “He is. He is probably my best friend. After Taehyung, of course,” she made sure to clear that out. “But he is still my boss and I respect him a lot,”

Just then, the studio door opened, and Min Yoongi came in, holding a six-pack of beers in one hand and a jumbo bag of chips.

            “Let’s finish this fucking EP already, oh… hello,” Yoongi seemed very confused by the presence of a stranger in his studio.

            “Hi, Yoongi, this is my brother Dae-Hyun,” Eunha was fast to say. “Dae-Hyun, this is Min Yoongi,”

            “Nice to meet you,” Dae-Hyun said, bowing his head and offering a friendly smile. Yoongi’s eyes went from brother to sister, trying to catch the similarities between them. “Let me help you with that,”

            “Thanks,” Yoongi said, letting Seong Dae-Hyun grab the beers effortlessly and put them in the mini-fridge.

            “I couldn’t leave him home alone,” Eunha explained. “He might burn down the house or something,”

            “Ha-ha,” Dae-Hyun ironically laughed, glaring at his sister. “She’s just scared that I bump into her boyfriend again,”

            “Taehyung had the brilliant idea of breaking into my room last night,” Eunha explained. “Now he doesn’t trust me,”

            “Honestly, I’m just surprised he had the physical ability to climb through your balcony,” Yoongi chuckled, finally sitting down in front of his computer. “Feel at home, Dae-Hyun-ssi,”

            “Thanks,” Dae-Hyun’s eye smile appeared as he took Yoongi’s word and sat on the couch. “I’ll be nice and quiet, don’t worry,”

            “Where do you want to start today?” Eunha asked, getting into work mode already.

            “I’d like to re-record the bass line now that you’re here,” Yoongi said, opening the bag of Cheetos and passing it to Eunha’s brother. She thought it was cute that he was doing his best effort to make Dae-Hyun feel welcome, knowing how hard it was for Yoongi to open up to strangers at first.

            “Can you remind me what's the melody?” Eunha was already walking over the guitars, taking the pretty precision bass she liked. Yoongi helped her plug it in and played the previous recording so she could figure out what to play.

Dae-Hyun kept his promise, allowing the two friends to work in peace, enjoying seeing their process and noticing how easily they understood each other, almost as if reading the other’s minds. After they finished recording all the bass parts, Yoongi made an unusual pause to open a beer and offer one to the guest.

            “We don’t usually drink at work,” Yoongi felt the need to explain. “But we’re really sick of this particular song. The process it’s been dull as hell,”

            “I imagine,” Dae-Hyun said, accepting the beer. “It sounds great, though. Did you write it?”

            “No, I’m only producing and mastering it,” Yoongi explained. It looked as if neither of them knew exactly what to do with their drinks. Dae-Hyun wasn’t sure if he had to turn his head to the side, not knowing if Yoongi was older or younger than him.

            “So, you’re Eunha’s older brother,” Yoongi said conversationally.

            “Yeah, for two years,” Dae-Hyun said, letting Yoongi do the math.

            “He was also born in 93,” Eunha finally said.

            “Really?” Dae-Hyun looked happy about it. “What month?”

            “March. I’m a Piscis,” Yoongi said. “I mean, not that I believe in that stuff but people always ask,”

Eunha almost laughed at how out of pocket his comment was.

            “I’m a Sagittarius,” Dae-Hyun said.

            “November or December?” Yoongi asked.

            “December,” Dae-Hyun said, finally drinking from his beer. “Jin-hyung is a Sag, too,”

Of course, Dae-Hyun had no idea who Jin-Hyung was but he made sure to remember that information. For a minute, the room went silent. None of the boys knew exactly what to talk about. Eunha was running through her head all the different possible conversation topics she could bring up to make the two of them keep talking.

            “Oh, did I mention Dae-Hyun plays baseball?” she was sure Yoongi had mentioned liking a sport that involved a ball, but she wasn’t sure which was it.

            “Played,” her brother corrected. “Well, I mean, I’m not playing at the moment,”

            “So, you’re in a team?” Yoongi asked with curiosity.

            “Yeah, but right now I’m on a break,” he explained. “I got in an accident recently so, I can’t really play,”

            “I’m sorry,” Yoongi said.

            “It’s okay, I’m still getting paid,” Dae-Hyun drank from his beer again and Yoongi mimicked him. “Do you play any sports?”

            “Basketball, but not professionally,” Yoongi said. “I considered it, though,”

            “Oh, so you must be good, then,”

            “I’m okay, I guess,” Yoongi said. Eunha was happy the conversation between them was going well. She really wanted them to get along, especially if Dae-Hyun was considering staying in Seoul for a while; she thought her brother could use some friends his age. “Of course, that wouldn’t have worked because of my height,”

“What are you talking about? You’re just perfect,” Dae-Hyun laughed. “Besides, stereotypical physical attributes end up being worthless if you compare them to actual talent and use of brains,”

 “Says the guy who is pure muscle,” Yoongi laughed.

            “That only means I don’t have the brains,” Dae-Hyun laughed even harder, making Yoongi laugh as well.

            “Shut up, you graduated with honors,” Eunha didn’t like when his brother used self-deprecating humor to entertain the rest. “He learned to play guitar overnight,”

            “Really?” Yoongi asked. “Do you play any other instruments?”

            “Mostly guitar and piano,” Dae-Hyun said. “But not seriously, I mean I just know a couple of scales,”

            “That’s all you need,” Yoongi said, trying to be nice. “Music is just a couple of scales if you think about it,”

            “I guess. Still, music is not where I shine the most. Not like you guys do,” Dae-Hyun finished his beer, not saying anything else. Yoongi followed right after, drinking the last sips from his bottle, and left it on the table before going back to his computer.

Eunha: So, Yoongi and Dae-Hyun met

Tae: how did that go?

Eunha: surprisingly good

Eunha: They seemed to get along well

Tae: Did you take him to the studio?

Eunha: Yeah, but he left a while ago

Eunha: Said he was meeting some old friends

Eunha: But I’m sure I saw a Tinder notification pop up on his screen

Tae: Good for him I guess

Tae: You said he broke up with his girlfriend, right?

Eunha: Yeah, some months ago

Eunha: So I’m happy for him to put himself out there or whatever

Eunha: What are you doing?

Tae: I’m taking Tae-Jun to get a haircut

Tae: He also needs some clothes

Tae: I don’t think I can make it to lunch babe

Eunha: It’s okay!!

Eunha: Are you free later?

Eunha: Yoongi invited Dae-Hyun to his place later

Tae: So, party at Yoongi’s at night?

Eunha: I don’t think he meant party, but he mentioned some wine

Tae: Sounds great!

Tae: Wait, am I invited or only Dae-Hyun?

Eunha: I’m sure he meant all of us

Eunha: I’ll ask him later

Tae: Alright, text you later

Tae: This kid is taking too long to pick a drink

Eunha: Cuteeeee

Tae: what about me?

Eunha: You're the cutest

Tae: ok

Tae: see you at night love

Eunha: bye 💗

(Previous) (Next)

[thanksjro]

More Than Meets the Eye #44 — Censere and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcape

This issue is about the Necrobot, who we haven’t heard about in a hot minute! Anyone remember what his whole deal was?

Ah, right. Thank you, Rewind.

Rewind’s busy bothering Rodimus while he moves furniture, Chromedome follows from a distance because he starts crying if his husband isn’t in his line of sight.

Megatron, meanwhile, is busy trying and failing to banter with Ultra Magnus, as they consider the bullet Velocity yanked out of Swerve’s shoulder at the end of the last issue.

Can you two leave some room for space Jesus? For fuck’s sake, you’re his superior officer, Megatron.

Megatron is assuming that Agent 113 is Vos, though he’s got no idea how the fucker can do his signature “firing a bullet through the eye of someone’s Autobot badge” thing since Vos has claws.

Which, I mean, he’s a gun, so it wouldn’t really matter if he’s got stiletto nails or not. Megatron, did you not pay attention to your extreme employee review team?

Someone finally opens the door for Rodimus, and he chides the two for discussing top secret matters in public, except it doesn’t really matter anymore, because the video inside the bullet was played in front of everyone’s favorite blabbermouth.

…Okay, maybe this sentient pile of knives could have an issue pulling a trigger.

So it turns out that the Vos we know isn’t the same Vos that Megatron was thinking of, being a replacement for Knife Vos here, who is our Agent 113. The bullet he popped into Swerve is a warning that he’s potentially been compromised, and considering the Vos we’re all familiar with is slightly less pointy, I think Knives McGee might have been right on the money.

Because the bullet sat in Swerve’s shoulder for literal years, most of the info in it is either corrupted or old news. The only thing the gang really has to work with is a potential location for the Necrobot, which is why Rewind was talking about the guy earlier. Rodimus makes a reference nobody but Swerve would get, while everyone else states what a waste of time going to visit Necrobot Planet would be. Magnus’s main concern is how they’ve been taking a lot of detours on what’s supposed to be the Knight Quest. Magnus must really want Megatron tried in court again. Can’t say I blame the guy.

Chromedome goes to bat for his husband, saying that it wouldn’t take that long to see the Necrobot, but Rodimus is certain that Necrobot Planet is in the opposite direction of where they’re supposed to be going. How could he know this, if Thunderclash is the only one who has the map to Cyberutopia in his brain, and he’s taking a big fat chronic illness nap?

Turns out that Rodimus has been chipping away at this since the explosive start of this adventure, mistaking it as run-of-the-mill carving shit into his desk up until Magnus finally said something. Still, Rodimus is very happy to have this proof of connection to Primus, or at least that’s what he thinks it is. It’s at this point that Chromedome eggs Rewind on to tell Rodimus the real reason he wants to see the Necrobot.

Because the big thing about the Necrobot is that he records all the Cybertronian deaths that happen in the galaxy, he would know if Dominus Ambus is dead or not, which would clear up a lot of stuff for Rewind. The whole point of Rewind signing up for the Knight Quest was so that he could search for his first husband.

Megatron agrees to help Rewind, probably because he knows that Rewind probably wouldn’t hesitate in murdering him again if need be, and so Rodimus is overruled. We’re going to Necroworld! Yaaaaaay!!

As the Lost Light makes its way, Ultra Magnus calls a private meeting with Rewind. Or rather, Minimus Ambus does, though the headless Magnus armor does make an appearance, looming off to the side in a rather grotesque fashion.

Just in case you forgot about all the quantum bullshit that happened a few issues back, Rewind mentions that they’ve had this conversation before, Rewind having assaulted the quantum duplicate of Minimus Ambus after he’d made the claim that Dominus was dead. Our Minimus called this meeting to level with Rewind, since the chance of actually confirming Dominus dead is pretty high. As was established in Last Stand of the Wreckers, spark twins can feel each other’s sparks, and actually depend on both sparks being maintained to survive. Dominus and Minimus aren’t twins, but they are brothers, and the fact that Minimus doesn’t feel him anymore doesn’t leave much room for hope.

Rewind then mentions how similar they look, and Minimus says “gee thanks, I get that a lot and I hate it, this is why I spend all my time in a mech suit.”

Later, we approach the Necroworld, which Rodimus thinks looks lame as hell. Mainframe asks for orders in relation to hailing the planet, Rodimus confuses the poor bastard to hell, and it’s revealed that not everyone is going down, as the Rod Pod is stealthily launched in an attempt to catch Cybertron’s Bigfoot.

Skids needles Nightbeat, asking how far he’s going to stick his nose into things on Necroworld, though Nightbeat seems to not be feeling the best. In what feels like a bit of a non sequitur, though maybe I’m just tired, Skids then talks about his lack of faith.

I’m sure the narrative isn’t going to make you eat those words later, Skids.

It’s at this point that we’ve gotten close enough to the planet’s surface to see that it’s covered in statues of Cybertronians (and also Windblade). So that’s a weird thing we’re going to have to figure out while we’re here.

The Rod Pod lands, and Nightbeat races after a closing door on the only building in the area, having seen someone go inside. He doesn’t make it, but points for trying. Swerve— who I’m not sure should be out of the hospital just yet, even if Velocity is also here— and Tailgate discuss how their plan of attack might have been misguided, while Mainframe has fun messing with the hologram statues. Chromedome hypothesizes that once a Cybertronian dies, the Necrobot turns off the statue for them, basing said theory of having found Ambulon’s plinth. Also, Ambulon’s full name is a little fucked up.

This is a Sakamoto issue, if you couldn’t tell.

Off in the tree line, Ravage is griping about how Megatron totally let Rewind walk all over him for this sidebar of a trip. Megatron, however, sets the record straight, saying that he agreed to to go to Necroworld to extend his time among the free and living. Rodimus suddenly having a map got him spooked, because it puts an actual timer on things.

Back over at that fortress Nightbeat smashed his face into, Detective Ikea is staking out, claiming that he won’t leave until the Necrobot lets him in. The Necrobot, who probably knows how stubborn Nightbeat is, gives in pretty quickly.

Damn baby, that’s a sick-ass cape. You get that at Hot Topic, along with that nondiegetic halo?

Over with the married couple, Chromedome is explaining to Rewind what Mainframe told him, about how all these statues probably have a singular database they’re pulling from, and that as such, he can hack one of the empty plinths to find Dominus’s status, so they don’t have to wander the whole planet looking for the guy. While Chromedome runs some tests to make sure this is actually going to work, Rewind messes with some of the blue flowers that are simply all over the place.

Chromedome calls Rewind over so they can do this thing. As he’s about to hit ‘enter’ however, Rewind hesitates, not sure he actually wants to know. He tells Chromedome to tell him what to do, like Chromedome doesn’t have a cocktail of complexes over his husband’s holding a torch for his ex.

The two of them kneel in the grass under the setting sun talking about how this will affect their relationship and calling each other pet names until Rewind finally hits the button.

A moment of silence for our Chromedome/Dominus endgame.

Back with Nightbeat, the Necrobot has lead him into a room decorated in what I’m going to call the “Gilded Rodimus” style, as they discuss how a lot of the folks who came out of the Rod Pod should be fucking dead. Guess the Necrobot didn’t consider the possibility of quantum duplication. Rookie mistake.

Necrobot— whose real name is Censere— reveals himself to be old as balls, having been around prior to the Functionists. He also explains what his whole deal is, saying that he’s just a guy who pays respect to the dead and catalogs them, so their death record exists in at least one place. Nightbeat looks disappointed, having expected he was magical, or perhaps even diefic. Unfortunately for Nightbeat, the internet exists, and Censere wouldn’t be living up to his name if he didn’t know how to keep records of who was around and how they generally lived their lives. He knows where to go and has a means to get there because his machinery has quantum tech that can scan for spark signatures. Censere seems kind of put off by Nightbeat’s questioning, and is beginning to wonder what’s up with Detective Ikea.

Nightbeat, you forced yourself into this man’s home and accused him of being the fucking tooth fairy, you can’t be mad when he doesn’t meet your wild-ass expectations.

NIGHTBEAT WHAT DID I JUST SAY

Yes, it turns out that being shot in the head and spending a few years in the Dead Universe actually did get to him a bit more than he typically lets on. He’s convinced that there’s no afterlife in any sense, and now that he’s back in the saddle of life, it tortures him to think that this is all he gets.

Hey, Roberts, did Nightbeat bully you in grade school or something? Why do you keep giving him existential crises? I’m starting to become concerned.

Nightbeat has a seat, and Censere comforts him, saying that just because he died and didn’t see anything, doesn’t necessarily disprove the afterlife existing. Who knows, maybe he didn’t die enough before the Dead Universe nabbed him to actually find out. It’s not like he can visit the afterlife to check, right? Maybe it’s fine!

Anyway, Nightbeat is still a detective at the end of the day, so he gets back to asking questions, wanting to know why Censere let him in.

Smashcut to Swerve taking a selfie with the goddamned Necrobot, while Rodimus calls the married couple to come back to the Rod Pod. Wonder if Misfire follows Swerve on Spacebook, I’m sure he’d die of jealousy if he knew this was happening.

Perceptor (who is also on this little excursion) is examining the weird blue flowers that are all over the place. It turns out that they’re made to hold residual spark energy, and the glow they put out is from the dozen or so sparks Censere’s shoved into each. Also, Nautica is posing in the background for some reason. She wasn’t back there a panel ago.

Chromedome and Rewind show up, Chromedome seeming to have fallen off the wagon once again, offering to yank the information about Dominus’s passing out of Rewind’s head. Before a lovers’ spat can start up, Nightbeat grabs Rewind and pulls him along to see something interesting. The interesting thing is a wall labeled “In Memory of the Disappeared”, and Nightbeat’s name is on it. Nightbeat’s statue is also known to be turned off, since when he got shot back in his Spotlight, Censure didn’t find his body and assumed that a headshot did the trick. There are many names on this wall, but only one is really relevant to Rewind, and it’s not the one that I’m choosing to believe is “Omlet”.

Chromedome/Dominus can still win.

We hit the epilogue, Nightbeat and Censere shaking hands as everyone else boards the Rod Pod. Nightbeat, being himself, asks another question, wanting to know if Censere would have saved him if he’d gotten there before the Dead Universe did its thing. Censere says that that’s against the rules. Nightbeat reminds him that Censere literally made every single guideline that he operates under, and oh hey, did you know that Cybertronians are an endangered species since their means of reproduction aren’t working anymore? Just a thing to consider, Mr. Necrobot.

Rodimus is ready to ship out, but his fellow co-captain is still out, having decided to got on a little jaunt with Ravage, since he found out what the flowers are really for.

See, Censere only plants flowers at the base of the plinth of the robot who killed the sparks housed within. And if there’s one thing Megatron’s known for—

—it’s appreciating a garden!

[tinyyoungblood]

hi!! adore your work love. could you maybe do smth where stark!reader has to get her wisdom teeth out but HATES the dentist so she brings her boyf peter and her dad w her?? and then when they get home the avengers are all waiting with like comical amounts of flowers and stuffed animals and then reader says some funny shiii and thor thinks she’s like dying lol. idk if that made sense but i’m getting my wisdom teeth out soon and i’m scared😭 thank u so so much love u babe

pairing: peter parker x stark!reader

a/n: tysm lovely :,) i rushed through this like my life depended on it, but i hope i’m not too late. either way, i hope you’re okay! it’s frightening but those bad boys gotta go because we don’t need that kind of energy in our lives. enjoy x

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

wisdom teeth? more like wisdoom

y/n has to get her wisdom teeth removed and it’s the singular most dreadful thing she’s ever had to do, which says a lot because her dad is tony richling stark

doing dreadful things she doesn’t want to do but still somehow end up doing just because she can is a personality trait at this point

no one really makes a big deal out of it since ~death~ is part of their job description, but y/n is terrified

and when a stark is terrified the only thing that will keep them one step from insanity is researching the hell out of it

that information will be info dumped into every conversation for the next few weeks leading up to the appointment

“y/n you need anything from the store?” "no thanks, did you know the side effects of getting your wisdom teeth out include ✨sudden death or blood clots✨ tho” “……..i have a coupon?”

the day of the appointment, peter comes along and literally doesn’t let go of y/n’s hand. he keeps touching her to let her know that he’s there and it’s so. adorable

he would rest his hand on her knee, gently stroke her back while holding her, or just play with her hair

happy drops them off and he’s too Cool™ for emotions but he knows y/n’s a wreck, so he just fist bumps her with a single nod and she almost breaks down bc it’s really affectionate

y/n is sitting in the dentist chair and genuinely nothing is happening yet, but she’s squeezing peter’s hand like it’s a sponge

peter might have a high pain tolerance but he’s in pain pain and he prays that his hand won’t just explode on him

the dentist notices how peter tries to keep it together and chuckles

“you okay there, son?” “yea it’s fine, had a better time when a building fell on me tho haha” “pardon?” “oh i mean i didn’t have a good time, i just had a better time”

because y/n is running Anxious Town™, the dentist gives her a sedative to help her relax 

plus, an injection of local anaesthetic to numb the tooth and surrounding area

she doesn’t feel anything and it’s GREAT

the procedure is quicker than expected and now the real fun begins

she tries to walk but she falls down so peter scoops her up bridal style and happy stays glued at her side

y/n doesn’t mind although she literally doesn’t recognise them and they’re practically strangers to her

but girly sees an opportunity and tries to flirt with peter bc why wouldn’t she

“you’re pretty” *blushes* “why thanks” “you should let your girlfriend know” “i should let her know i’m pretty?” “so you do have a gf? :(” “yea it’s you�� “:)”

they stop for gas and peter goes in to get some water for y/n, and in her infinite wisdom, she decides it’s burger time

her mouth is completely numb and she’s practically leaving a trail of drool behind her, but she’d kill for a burger right now

so she wobbles around aimlessly for an hour on some random parking lot as if the ground might just magically open up like a rabbit hole and lead her to five guys

she’s going places. not back to the car. definitely not five guys. they’re closed. but places

peter finally finds her and he’s drenched from head to toe in sweat. he doEsn’T wAnt tO tALk abOut iT tho so she lets him take her to subway instead

normally, she would know that peter’s usual subway order is bread-lettuce-jalapeño

but in her drugged-up state, it had simply slipped her mind so now she’s staring at him like he’d just murdered someone right in front of her

“that- that’s your order?? no meat or anything just bread, lettuce, and a little spice?”

meanwhile at the compound, sam and steve are ordering everyone around bc they want to decorate this place before y/n gets home to surprise her

they take it very seriously too. they’ve watched like one HGTV show and said it’s our time

they finally get home and tony gives y/n a big hug, asking her what took so long

happy tells him that she was keen on getting burgers bc apparently someone has taught her that stressful times call for ~cheeseburgers~

he proceeds to look at tony with a pointed look

tony just shrugs and goes “she was a problem child. we don’t mention her dark past”

she’s swaying on the spot and keeps grinning like a fool and thor just stares at her weirdly before elbowing bruce and whispering loudly,

“what’s wrong with her? is she dying? should i start collecting leaves, i know this remedy—"

no one can tell if y/n is just happy to see the newly decorated home or if she’s just delighted to see everyone but then she goes around hugging the entire team

she doesn’t even acknowledge the sky-high pile of teddy bears and flowers everywhere bc she’s just squeezing everybody

y/n is so high, she just starts to spill all of her feelings about everyone and they’re already so overwhelmed by the hug chain they can’t take this too

“wanda i just want you to know that you’re like my big sister and you’re always taking care of me and i know you and vision are just going to make such good parents one day”

“bucky you absolute PRICK, you FIEND, you’re the best chess player ever and that’ll never change and i wouldn’t be good without you, i hate to say it but you deserve happiness even after you made me lose five times in a row yesterday”

“dad, you’re so strong and smart, even though we’re like never on the same page, you’re always along for the ride, i want to be like you when i grow up, i swear i’m gonna try to be as good to the avengers as you were to us” “aww- wait makes you think i'll be the first to die“

“nat you’re such a bitch about your protein shakes but you’re my best friend and i wouldn’t have it any other way, you can try out as many make up looks on me as you want”

“bruce, brucey, i would live with you in your lab for the rest of my days if i had to, whenever you ask me to hand you stuff i feel useful and important”

“laura’s way out of your league clint i have no idea how the fuck you got her but don’t lose her and i want to be your next child’s godmother”

“steve…we’re your family now. we’re always gonna be your family now. okay?”

“loki you’re not fooling anyone with your attitude, we all know you’re part of the family, you were just misunderstood and messed up bc of your dad–FUCK him by the way–but i realised everyone deserves as many chances as they need because of you”

“sam i would genuinely kill anyone who wronged you, even if they cut you in line at the grocery store, i would knife them no hesitation”

“thor, you poor golden retriever have been through so much, on my way here i made a wish on an eyelash for you bc you deserve better, your postcards always make my day, love you”

she mumbles something to peter that no one else can hear but he blushes and chokes back a sob

y/n orders hot soup and bucky brings it to her but before he even has time to react peter drops everything and ZOOMS across the room in .3 seconds

he barrels into bucky so hard they both go flying, but peter just smoothly rolls out of it and onto his feet like some kind of super ninja

“DUDE WHAT THE HELL” “😠 y/n is not supposed to drink hot liquids 😠”

all of this happens in mere seconds but sam has filmed it all and now slow mo clips go viral online of some mysterious kid knocking over the winter soldier

y/n’s a little in and out after that, but when she fully regains consciousness, she’s on a pile of blankets, surrounded by the team on the floor <3

* * *

let me know if this is actually comforting lmao stay hydrated pals

hc masterlist

[sour--disposition]

Behind His Back

-

harry lewis x fem!reader

-

please see my pinned post for masterlists/request info :)

requested: Hello, could you do something where reader is best mates with cal and he brings her to shoots and in vids and such and her and Harry are kinda together but no one knows then someone accidentally outs them thanks !! 🙌🏻

Yours and Cal’s laughter reached the spot that the other guys had picked for filming long before the two of you did, poking and chasing each other as you barrelled through the doors. Cal was joining in on some game that they were filming for moresidemen and he’d dragged you along so you could sit off camera and poke fun at all eight of them.

As soon as you’d fallen into the venue, a bright smile had stretched across Harry’s face. Seeing you as happy and full of life as you were made him impossibly happy, as soppy as it sounded. All he wanted was to wander over and pull you into his arms, maybe surprise you so you let out that funny squeal you did whenever she shocked you.

But he couldn’t.

Although he’d never said it, it was sort of an unwritten rule of Cal’s that you were off limits for any of his friends. Maybe that made it all the more exciting, sneaking around behind your best friend’s back. You knew that it wouldn’t end well, it would either end in heartbreak between you and Harry or anger from Cal. Neither was an outcome you wanted, but one of them was bound to be inevitable.

Ethan had noticed Harry staring at you and was prepared to embarrass his best friend, not knowing that he was one of the only people that knew the truth about yours and Harry’s relationship. “Gonna go give your girlfriend a smooch, Bog?”, Ethan asked, grin as bright as ever as he shoved Harry playfully in your direction.

You and Harry both froze, eyes wide in surprise and fear. The humour drained out of Ethan’s face as he watched yours and Harry’s reactions and a tense atmosphere immediately fell over the group. Even the camera crew looked awkward.

You could see Harry desperately trying to conjure up some sort of excuse for what Ethan had just said. Ethan looked like he would do just about anything to retract his words. But what was said was said and you just had to deal with the consequences.

“What the fuck is he on about?”, Cal asked, voice harsh and angry. His eyes were fixed on Harry, practically pinning him to the spot. “Harry. What the fuck is Ethan on about?”.

“Look, mate-”, Harry started, words getting caught in his throat.

“How could you?”, Freezy spat, voice like venom. He turned to you, looking at you like you’d just taken a knife to his back. “And you?”.

“Don’t be mad at her, Cal”, Harry pleaded, voice desperate.

“I’ll be mad at whoever the fuck I wanna be mad at!”, Cal shouted, making Harry jump and sending a wave of anger coursing through your veins.

“You know what, no”, you started, leaving Cal’s side of the room and walking to stand in between the two of them. “You have no right to be mad. We’re adults. We don’t answer to you. I don’t answer to you”, you stressed.

You could tell that the others in the room had no idea what to do. Guilt was written all over Ethan’s face and varying levels of worry and awkwardness seemed to be spread throughout the rest of the guys. Everyone was following the discussion like a ball in a tennis match.

“I live with him and you’re my best friend, I’m kind of involved in this!”, Cal exclaimed. You mumbled something under your breath that neither Cal or Harry heard, but it only seemed to antagonise Cal more. “What?”, he demanded.

“I’m just saying, last time I checked, it’s not you sneaking me into your apartment, but whatever”, you commented casually.

“Y/N”, Harry warned from behind you, taking a few steps closer to you.

“I’m not going to pick between my best friend and my boyfriend!”, you cemented. “If you’re going to make me pick, you’re making the decision for me”, you told Cal, a finger pointed towards him. “And it won’t go in your favour”, you cautioned.

“You’d pick Harry over me?”, Cal asked, looking genuinely offended. “I’ve known you since we were 12”, he reminded you.

“I love him”, you said, voice suddenly small and shy. “And if you don’t want any part of that, then I don’t know what to tell you”, you shrugged before turning your back and walking out of the venue.

Harry stood stock still. Everything in his body was telling him to chase after you, tell you that he felt the same way, but he couldn’t get his body to move. The shock of Cal finding out and then you telling everyone that you loved him, it left him paralysed.

“Is anyone gonna go after her?”, Vik asked, eyes tearing between Harry and Cal.

“I’ll go”, Harry and Freezy said at the same time.

“She won’t wanna see you right now, mate… In the nicest way possible”, Harry told his friend, leaving him no time to answer before following you out of the venue and finding you a few feet away, sat on a bench.

“Hey”, Harry said, catching your attention. He sat down next to you, forearms resting on his thighs as he leaned forwards. “That could’ve gone better”, he whispered, pulling a sardonic laugh from you.

“You think”, you snorted.

“I love you, too”, Harry blurted, barely giving you time to finish your sentence.

Before you had a chance to say or do anything in response, Cal was stalking away from the venue doors and towards the two of you. “Cal-”, you started.

“Look”, he sighed. “I reacted badly. I shouldn’t have gotten angry, alright”, he huffed. “I was just caught off guard, I had no idea”, he defended.

“That was sort of the point”, you chuckled. “Because we were worried about what you’d say”, you explained. “Or that you’d react like this”.

Harry sat still beside you, always unsure of what to do or say when it came to disagreements between you and Cal, and it was only made worse by the fact that he was in the middle of the situation. He let his hand leave his lap and join yours, squeezing around your fingers supportively.

“Nothing I say is gonna make this go away?”, Cal asked, face pulled with pain.

“No”, you said simply, a sense of finality settling in your voice. “If you love me enough to be worried about Harry hurting me, then you love me enough to let me love Harry”, you told him gently. “And, in the nicest way possible, it really has nothing to do with you”.

Cal sat down next to you, a heavy sigh leaving his chest as he sunk into the bench. “I feel like I should’ve seen this coming”, he complained.

“To be honest, mate, you really are clueless”, Harry chuckled from beside you.

“How long have you been together?”, Cal asked you, looking up at you from his dejected slump.

“Officially, almost three months”, you told Cal.

“Unofficially?”, he asked warily.

“Nearly six”, you admitted.

“How did I not realise?”, Cal groaned, dropping his head against the backrest of the bench. “I can’t believe I missed it”.

“We were really good at hiding it”, Harry shrugged. “It was like mission impossible to be honest, you made everything quite inconvenient”, he jibed, earning him a swat over the head from Cal.

“At least I never heard you shagging”, Cal sighed. His eyes went wide as a silence fell over you and Harry, a smirk threatening to peak through onto your lips. “Are you fucking kidding me!?”, he exclaimed, almost jumping up out of his seat.

“Yeah, none of those one night stands were one night stands”, Harry mumbled as he itched the back of his neck awkwardly. “Sorry, and all”. You could see Cal cringing, knowing that he’d heard his two best friends have sex with each other couldn’t have been a fun thought to have running through his mind.

“If you excuse me, I am off to pour acid into my ears”.

[phoenixyfriend]

Auntie ‘Soka and Little Leia (and Rex)

The counterpart to Uncle Ben and Little Luke (Original Post, Chrono)

Listen. You all knew this was coming.

This got... very long and detailed and I’m going to have to clean it up and post to AO3. As in, this was supposed to be 2-3k and is literally ten times that long. It crossed 25k. And the initial section actually glosses over a bunch, actual fic-style writing starts at “That, of course, is when things get interesting.”

Warnings: discussion of various canon traumas (most relating to being child soldiers), general PTSD, several scenes featuring dissociation or panic attacks upon being triggered, and canon-typical violence.

Rated T, gen.

I still want there to be de-aging nonsense involved so Ahsoka is physically a late teenager despite having a solid two decades of field experience behind her (we’re pulling her from Malachor).

Leia, much like Luke, is now six. She just came from being a rebellion general. She is not happy about being a child. She was already short, this is just mean.  She’s a human espresso.

UNLIKE BEN, Ahsoka is not happy about this turn of events. Being seventeen-ish is not helpful in the outer rim. She’s a female togruta, young and healthy, and in the Outer Rim, caring for a small human child. Sure, she has her lightsabers and plenty of combat experience, and she can keep them safe, but she’s just one person, and a major target for those looking to make some quick cash. It doesn’t matter how good she is; she needs sleep at some point.

It makes my heart happy to treat Ahsoka and Rex as two halves of the same black ops specialist so you know what, he’s there too! He’s physically like... 10-12 in natborn, maybe. They’re not sure, because clones age weird. He’s moderately more useful than Leia (who is very competent but also physically six, and short for that age), but he’s still... very small.

Reminder that none of them have been born yet.

Ahsoka has a harder time explaining WHY she has children with her, since she's barely more than a kid herself, and clearly unrelated by species. She sometimes just says “Oh, my adoptive brother’s kids” since it’s kind of the truth for Leia and she’s not touching the actual truth about Rex with a ten foot pole.

Ahsoka definitely knows about Leia being a Skywalker, or at least has suspicions that Bail never outright confirmed but was conspicuously quiet about. She does tell Leia about it, but it’s not like that means anything, right? Just, you know, your dad was my teacher! I don’t have to tell you he became Va--oh shit, you already knew that part. Well, fuck. What do you mean he had a son? OH SHIT, PADME HAD TWINS.

Alt take for explaining why she’s got kids: She’s my foundling, I know her name as my child (Leia shut up!!!)

(Ahsoka can fake Mandalore. Sometimes.)

That said, there is... significantly less gambling and significantly more theft to get to Coruscant.

As previously stated, Ahsoka is a black ops kinda gal, and more importantly, she looks like a fairly attractive young woman in the Outer Rim, with two children in good health. She’s a target, and also not the kind of person one generally gambles with. If she does gamble, people get upset when she doesn’t lose, in ways they don’t get upset about Ben doing the same, because she’s, again, a cute teenage girl. It’s exhausting.

As things go, she largely ends up stealing from people who deserve it and/or smuggling herself and her charges into someone else’s ship. They’re small, they can hide. Sometimes she can get them all passage by working as a mechanic, she’s good at that.

Once they’ve got a handle on when they are, they have to decide on Names. None of them have been born yet, so technically they could use their own names without anyone Knowing. Rex and Leia might not even be born, depending on how successful they are at, you know, stopping the war and everything. Ahsoka, though, she’s going be born in two years, and there’s no reason to prevent it, so... she doesn’t want to steal baby-her’s name. That would be mean.

Leia is already calling her “Auntie ‘Soka” when she can for reasons like “selling the bit” and “manipulating adults” and “making us both feel better after we had a mutual breakdown about Anakin being Vader.” Ergo, she decides that whatever new name she picks better include that in some way, and decides on “Sokari” because it sounds pretty.

Overall, they don’t... they don’t actually make it very far before there’s an Incident. Again, teenager with small children. They spend a lot of time hiding out in space ports looking for an opportunity.

That, of course, is when things get interesting.

Specifically, Ahsoka spots a Mandalorian.

She doesn’t recognize the armor. She does recognize the sigil, and thinks ‘well, they’re more likely to help than some,’ because from what she’s heard, the Haat Mando’ade are Decent People Overall. Her view is a little biased, mostly on account of the sheer level of grudge she has against Kyr’tsad. It’s fine! The True Mandalorians have the same grudge, right? And Mandalorians like kids and Ahsoka hasn’t slept in five days and it’s fine. It’s fine! IT’S FINE.

“Oh shit,” Rex whispers, before she can suggest anything. “Oh fuck.”

“Stop cursing,” Leia hisses, elbowing him. “People are going to notice.”

“That’s the Prime,” Rex panics, mostly quiet. Ahsoka’s heart drops, because fuck is right. “That’s Fett.”

Leia isn’t impressed. Ahsoka just angles herself between Fett and Rex and hopes that he doesn’t see them. That’s just asking for trouble.

Unfortunately, Ahsoka is in fact running on none sleep with left trauma, and doesn’t notice Fett walking up and dropping into a seat across from them until he’s actually done so, removing his helmet to glare a little more efficiently.

“Wanna explain why your kid has my face?”

Ahsoka later tells herself that he’s killed Jedi and that’s why he can sneak up on her, and that she can be forgiven some slip-ups with the exhaustion being what it is, and that she’s obviously going to be dealing with some emotional instability in light of the sudden return of teenage hormones and new forms of anxiety that are markedly different from those she was dealing with a few weeks ago.

What Ahsoka wants to say is “that’s kind of a long story,” or “maybe he’s a cousin,” or “kriff off, I don’t know you,” or maybe even “he’s a clone.”

What Ahsoka actually does is burst into tears, which is embarrassing for her, for Fett, for the kids, and for the entire rest of the bar.

It really is the straw that broke the eopie’s back. Even when she was actually this age, she didn’t exactly cry much. Objectively, Fett quasi-aggressively asking a valid question shouldn’t send her into a panic. She’s been through torture and worse. She shouldn’t be crying.

But she is, sobbing her eyes out with no control, and he’s just sitting across from her and looking uncomfortable while Rex wraps his little arms--oh Force he’s so small--around her, and both ‘children’ glare at Fett.

“So, I’m going to take it she didn’t kidnap you from a loving family or do something illicit with a blood sample,” Fett says, after it becomes obvious that Ahsoka’s not going to be ready to talk any time soon.

“She didn’t,” Rex says stiffly, with just the right emphasis for Fett to catch what’s implied. Ahsoka just keeps her head down, eyes pressed against the heels of her palms, trying to get her body to stop rebelling against her.

Fett’s eyes dart to Leia, who folds her arms and draws herself up, every bit the unimpressed princess. “My father claimed her as a sister, so she’s my Auntie ‘Soka.”

The man dithers a bit, the conversation clearly not going where he’d expected. “Right,” he says. “You--you’re all kids. I thought she was a little older, at least, but I didn’t have a good look at her face before.”

She is older, but actually admitting that is only going to make this worse, both for her pride and for her chances of making it out alive.

“Where are you staying?”

“What?” Leia bites out.

“You’re kids, you’re alone, and you’re clearly not okay if you were trying to hide the one with my face as blatantly as you did, and then... whatever this is, when I confronted you,” Fett explains. Ahsoka lifts her head to glare at him, but it’s probably not doing much with the way her eyes are rimmed with red and still wet. “Don’t give me that look, ad’ika, your kids looked as confused and horrified by that as the bartender did. They obviously didn’t think it was normal either.”

Well, kriff you too, Ahsoka thinks.

“And what do you mean by ‘blatantly,’ here?” Leia challenges. It’s adorable, but Ahsoka watched this tiny girl shoot a man last week, and wonders when people are going to start taking that seriously.

“There’s a lot of people in this galaxy, and I don’t exactly have the clearest memory of what I looked like at that age,” Fett says, slow and careful like he thinks they’re dumb. Ahsoka decides to chalk it up as being because Leia’s visibly six. “I would have thought it was just a coincidence if you hadn’t put in effort to hide him.”

Leia huffs, and Rex glares harder. Fett just sighs, like they’re all going to give him grey hairs.

“You can explain whatever the hell’s going on,” Fett says. “I’ll let you stay on my ship, there’s a spare bunk and you’re small.”

“For free?” Rex demands.

“A night on a bunk in exchange for information,” Fett clarifies. “We can negotiate from there.”

Ahsoka takes a few moments, notes that both of the others are waiting on her for the decision, and cringes. She doesn’t feel steady enough to carry that. She has to anyway.

“Rex?” she asks, voice rasping after the breakdown of the past few minutes.

“Yeah?”

“How much?”

He looks up at her, eyes calculating, and grimaces. “We don’t want Order 66. A warning is better, even if we... share information.”

She nods, and turns to Leia. “Any premonitions, princess?”

Leia glowers, cute and furious. “No.”

“No, don’t tell, or no, you aren’t getting any vibes about sharing info one way or the other?”

“The latter,” Leia clarifies, huffy to the last.

“Right,” Ahsoka says, and then just... hesitates. “Fett...”

“You’ve got conditions,” he guesses.

She bares her teeth in what could have, through a squint and perhaps a few drinks, been called an apologetic smile. “Just one, really.”

“Yeah?”

“No hurting, killing, or turning us in for bounties,” she says. “Any of us.”

“You’re children, I wouldn’t.”

She blinks at him, slow and careful. She hesitates. She reaches down, out of sight, sees him stiffen.

She unclips her sabers from her belt and puts them on the table.

His eyes are fixed on the weapons the second they enter his line of sight, and don’t move as he clearly realizes why she made the condition she did.

“I left years ago, because I couldn’t stay without it ruining me,” she says. Still slow. Still careful. She’s so tired. “But if I want to keep Leia safe, I have to get back to Coruscant.”

His eyes finally lift from the sabers, expression blank. “Just her?”

“Rex doesn’t have the same monsters coming after him,” she says. “If it were just me and him, I’d worry less. Leia’s a different kind of target.”

“You’re putting a lot of faith on the table by telling me that,” Fett says, voice flat and toneless. “Considering my occupation.”

“She’s a child,” Ahsoka says, feeling heavy and boneless. “Even with what I was and will be, even with what money you would get from the right buyer, you wouldn’t.”

“There are other risks.”

“There are.”

They stare at each other for too long, probably, and then Fett jerks as Rex kicks him under the table. The boys glare for a moment, and then Rex says, “If she weren’t good, I’d still be a slave to those who grew me.”

Fett blinks, and then nearly growls the word, “What?”

“She freed me,” Rex reiterates. “While I was trying to shoot her.”

Ahsoka lifts a hand and puts it on his far shoulder, pulling him into her side. She doesn’t meet Fett’s eyes again, because part of her is back on Mandalore, dodging her own soldiers and crying out as her family dies across the galaxy.

Fett breathes in. Breathes out. He puts a hand to his head, visibly frustrated. “Fine. A good Jedi kid, and two smaller kids, one of which is apparently in some way mine.”

Rex makes a face, which is fair, but also not helping.

“To the ship,” Ahsoka says, putting her sabers back on her belt and sliding out of the seat. “I’m... I’m Sokari.”

“You already know my name.”

“I do.”

---------------------------

Fett watches her like she’s a predator, which has the benefit of being accurate and slightly flattering. She lets other two take care of most of talking, and then Fett tells her to sleep first, and talk in the morning.

“You’re dead on your feet, jetii,” he snorts. “And that crying jag didn’t do you any favors. Sleep.”

So she does, and Fett doesn’t even wake her. He just lets her sleep. He watches her in the way of a guard. She sees him when she gets up to use the ‘fresher in the middle of the night, but he doesn’t even comment when she collapses right back into the mediocre cot she’s borrowed for the cycle.

Rex and Leia are safe, her hindbrain tells her, even in the depths of sleep. Her mind curls around theirs in the Force, and she trusts that they are here. They are not happy, but they are alive and unharmed, and that has to be enough.

When she stumbles her way to true wakefulness, groggy and loose-limbed, Fett greets her with caf.

“The kids wouldn’t let me near you,” he tells her.

“They’re good,” she says, cupping her hands around the mug. She feels wobbly, in every sense. Her body, her mind, her emotions, her connection to the Force. Nothing is on-kilter right now. “Did they tell you anything?”

“They waited for you,” he says. “But the little miss needed a nap of her own. They’re down in the other bunk.”

“I didn’t notice,” she admits. She should have. She’s Fulcrum. She’s a veteran of the Clone Wars. She’s... she’s supposed to be better than this.

“How long?” he asks, and then when she squints up at him, he clarifies. “How long did you fight?”

“My last fight--”

“No, whatever war you came out of,” he says. Her chest twists cold. “I don’t know if the Jedi sent you into it or if you waded in yourself once you left, but you move like a soldier.”

“I was,” she confirms. “But... but I don’t want to talk about the details. Not until the other two are here.”

He frowns at her. “Is there anything you can talk about?”

She shrugs and looks away, trying to take solace in the warmth of the caff she holds above the table, as if it can hide her, guard her, from the disgraced Mand’alor across the table.

“Jedi?”

“I’m not officially a Jedi,” she says, voice quiet. “Not anymore.”

“Then what do I call you?” he asks. “We’re not exactly close enough for names.”

“Torrent,” she says. “It’s not--I can’t claim my family name anymore. But I can claim Torrent, so I will. And if you want a title, I was a commander.”

“Bit young for that.”

“I got the rank when I was fourteen,” she says, and watches his face do something complicated and unpleasant. “Don’t. I know your own culture puts children on the field that young.”

“Not in command.”

She shrugs. “Yeah, well... the soldiers were technically younger. Adults, but...”

Ahsoka can see the way he casts about to figure out what species grows at that rate. He guesses a few, and she shoots all of it down.

She won’t tell him. Not until Rex is awake.

This part of the story is his.

--------------------------

When Leia tries to sit alone, a foot away on the bench like a proper adult, Ahsoka refuses to let it happen. She pulls the younger girl to her side and quells protests with a glance. It’s a decent skill, but she’s not sure how long it’s going to work on her niece-in-spirit.

“Your body needs the chemical release of skinship,” she says, and Leia glares at her. “I spent way too much time with the boys to not know about this. Deal.”

Rex sits close enough to knock their knees together under the table, and his warmth is the old comfort she needs.

“Do you want the story you’ll believe, or the truth?” Ahsoka asks.

“What’s the difference?”

“One of them involves something so impossible that even most Jedi wouldn’t believe it,” she tells him.

Fett folds his arms and leans forward to rest them on the table, challenging but oddly open. “Try me.”

“Time travel.”

He blinks, just once, fully controlled. “That’s a tough one.”

“There were only three Jedi left alive when I died,” she says. “Or... whatever it is that happened to me. I think I died. All I know is that one moment, I was thirty-two and dying, and the next, I was... seventeen again, and had these two with me. All of us younger than we were. None of us have even been born yet.”

She refuses to look him in the eye. “They both outlived me by... six years, maybe. Got caught up while traveling instead of dying. Leia was twenty-two. Rex was thirty-five. I’m not technically the oldest anymore. I mean, physically I am, but that doesn’t mean anything, and it’s not exactly doing us any good, and--”

Rex bumps his shoulder to her arm. “I dunno, Commander. I’ve spent a long time looking older than I should. Nice to look younger for once.”

She shoots him a small, pained grin. “Could be worse, yeah.”

“Let’s say I believe you.”

Her attention snaps back to Fett, who’s looking damnably blank, and is showing even less in the Force.

He waits a second for her to relax back into her seat.

“Let’s say I believe you,” he repeats. “How’s ‘Rex’ connected to me? What’s so special about Leia there? And what war did you fight in that has you acting like a veteran?”

“Three years in the clone wars,” she whispers, glancing to Rex and forcing herself to not go for her sabers to defend against an attack that her paranoia says is coming and the Force says is not. “Then almost all the Jedi were wiped out at once, and I spent a year... drifting. Then black ops for the next fifteen.”

“Black ops,” he repeats, still damnably flat.

“There was a Sith Empire,” she says, and she can hear her own tone growing somehow emptier. “Glassing planets. Enslaving entire species. Committing genocides all over. Of course, there was a rebellion, and of course I joined it. I was one of the only people left with Jedi training. For all that I’d left the Order, I still had a duty to the universe.”

His eyes flit to Leia, who shrugs and tries to look prim. “I was adopted and raised by one of the founders of the rebellion, a movement built on the desire to instate freedom and democracy in a galaxy that had lost even the pretense.”

“That why you’re special?”

Leia smiles, thin and patronizing. It doesn’t fit on her little face. “I’m special because my biological father was one of the most powerful Force users in history, and his Fall to the dark side and choice to become a Sith is why the Emperor’s rise was nearly uncontested. I do not like power, but it’s in my veins and I can’t change that. Force users are... a lucrative trade, and I’m still the size of a child, so I can’t fight back. I’ll be safer in the Jedi Temple, even if I don’t want to be a Jedi.”

Fett looks to Ahsoka, makes to ask a question, and then shakes his head. Not the time, maybe.

“So, that’s all... very complicated and I don’t know how much of it I believe, but it doesn’t explain...” he trails off, and sighs. “My kid, or whatever you are. I heard you mention clones.”

Rex grins. It is not a kind expression.

“Let me tell you about Kamino.”

---------------------------

Ahsoka has no idea if Fett believes them. Either he thinks they’re telling the truth, or he thinks their delusional kids. Whatever the case, he offers to take them closer to the Core. Ahsoka quietly offers to take a look at his engine in return, and then pretends not to notice when Fett awkwardly drifts to and away from Rex.

“They put chips in our brains to make us kill the Jedi we respected, cared for, even loved. I tried to shoot ‘Soka, Fett. She was seventeen and risked her life to get that chip out of my head while I was trying to kill her. I have never hated myself more than when I woke up and realized what I’d almost done, and I was one of the few that were able to fight it. I heard the stories of dozens of brothers who woke with their chips having degraded and chose to eat their blaster rather than live with the guilt of the orders they’d followed without question because of a thrice-damned Sith slave chip in their head.”

“So no, I won’t call you father or acknowledge you as clan until you do something to prove you’re worth it, shared blood or not.”

What Ahsoka does get out of the arrangement, for all that Fett’s route mostly takes them on a meandering path that isn’t faster than their previous system, is sleep. She gets to rest. She gets to trust that Fett won’t kill Rex, out of guilt for something he hasn’t done, that he won’t kill Leia out of a worry that she’s just a delusional child, a real child, that he won’t kill ‘Sokari’ because it would ruin any chance of gaining Rex’s favor, ever.

She’s not safe, won’t believe she can be until she’s in the Temple and Sidious is dead dead dead, but she’s safer than she’s been in a long time.

Every night, Ahsoka wakes up and stumbles to the little galley, deaths and torture sparkling behind her eyes with the energy of a thousand lost Jedi, ten thousand mourned brothers and sisters.

She is not the only one of their little group to be a survivor of a near-total genocide, but Rex could not feel his brothers die in the Force, even if his nightmares featured what they heard of suicide missions by the emperor’s favored shock troopers, and Leia had... Alderaan had more off-world survivors than there had been Jedi at all.

It’s not worth comparing their pain. It’s stupid to even think it. Part of her can’t help but do it anyway.

“Caf?”

She feels a lek twitch in response to the voice of the only other person on board who can reach the top shelf. “I probably shouldn’t.”

“Whiskey?”

“That’s a definitely shouldn’t.”

“Hoth chocolate?”

“...please.”

She doesn’t lift her head from her arms until the mug clicks down in front of her, ceramic on plastisteel.

“Do I ask what it was this time?”

She shrugs. “It’s hard to explain to non-sensitives.”

“Try me anyway.”

Ahsoka twists the Hoth chocolate in her hands, takes a sip as she thinks. “The Force isn’t just one thing. It’s... energy and philosophy and spirit, a sense of being that ties the entire universe together. Sentient and inanimate and living and dead, empty space and lush forests and stifled cities. For those of us who are sensitive to it, it’s possible to feel the life of everyone around you, theoretically possible to feel entire systems. If you have a Force bond, like a master and padawan, that can stretch across planets, even systems if one or both are particularly powerful.

“So just... just imagine, for a moment, what it’s like to feel the screaming of all those Jedi in the Force as their trusted men shot them down.

“Some of them were close enough that I could feel them die,” she manages. “I... it’s horrible. It’s horrific. It’s not something I can ever forget, and I want to. I want to forget what that moment was like. Not that it happened, but...”

She can feel the tears. Fuck..

“You want to dull the edges.”

“Don’t we all?” she asks, scrubbing the back of her hand across her eyes. “Leia lost her entire planet, billions of people, and she was forced to watch. Rex... Force, I can barely imagine, and I was there for most of it.”

Fett watches her, measuring. “From what he said, they were as much your brothers as his, by the end.”

“No,” she immediately denies. “They could have been, maybe, but the ones I was closest to died earlier, and then I left, and by the time the Empire rose, all but a handful were... no. Rex, I will claim as a brother in all the ways that matter, but I don’t get to do that with the rest. I don’t have the right.”

“You’re hard on yourself.”

“Fate of the galaxy, my good bitch. Guess who’s got it on her shoulders.”

He snorts at her, and nods at the mug. “Drink your Hoth chocolate. We’re landing in eight hours, and you’ve got kids to look out for.”

---------------------------

There’s a twitch in the Force when they land, something pulling at her in a way she barely feels. She’s had her shields up so fully for so long that it’s natural to hide away what she is to the point where she can hardly tell what anyone else is, either. It takes more than a moment to remember how to let herself spread out across the world.

“Auntie ‘Soka? Why’d you stop?”

She doesn’t have an answer to Leia’s prodding question. “I don’t know.”

It’s almost familiar. Old and half-forgotten, not the same as what she remembers, but--

“This way,” she says, and wanders off into the crowd. Leia and Rex follow without question. Fett curses and rushes through the rest of his transaction with the docking attendant. The sound of him jogging after them is almost funny, with the armor, but she can’t focus on that.

Ahsoka slips between people with the ease of a career built on such a habit, children trailing like ducklings. She knows this feeling, she knows this person, what is she missi--

“Oh,” she breathes, going stock still. She knows that face. She knows those braids. She even knows the presence.

Younger than Ahsoka had ever seen her, but unmistakably Master Billaba.

“Torrent, what the hell?” Fett demands, finally catching up. “You can’t just run off like that!”

“It’s Depa,” she says, eyes still fixed on the woman parsing through a datapad with an irritated vendor. She has a padawan braid. It doesn’t feel like Master Windu is on-planet, so this might be a solo mission, a... oh. Senior Padawan, Knight Elect. This is the kind of mission taken to test if she’s ready to be promoted.

Ahsoka feels light-headed.

Fett waits for her to elaborate, but she can’t. This was Kanan’s master. This was a member of the High Council. This was a woman who died and--

“You need to sit down,” Fett says, not a touch gruff. He puts a hand on her shoulder and guides her off the main walkway. “I’m... going to talk to the woman in the Jedi robes. You three just stay there and don’t get kidnapped.”

Ahsoka nods, feeling like she’s not quite inhabiting her own body.

It’s Depa.

Her eyes track Fett without conscious control, and her montrals pick up the sound.

Depa looks up when the armor comes close enough, free hand tensed in a way that says she’s preventing herself from reaching for a saber in reaction to the heavily-armored individual standing several feet away.

“Mando,” the woman says. “May I help you?”

“Are you Depa?”

Depa doesn’t do anything so dramatic as gape or step back, but she does blink rapidly for a moment. She then folds her hands down in front of her, drawing her spine up ramrod straight. “I am Jedi Padawan Depa Billaba, yes. May I ask why it is that you need to know?”

Ahsoka imagines Fett grimacing, or rolling his eyes, or maybe dithering. She can’t tell from this angle, and he has a helmet on besides. It turns his awkward silences into judgmental ones.

“I’ve had some Jedi kids on my ship, hitching a ride,” he says at length. “One of them recognized you and then just... froze.”

“You have our younglings in your care,” Depa says, carefully not accusatory, but close enough to be a warning.

“Not quite,” he says. “The one that actually came from the temple is seventeen. One of ‘em isn’t Force Sensitive, and the last one is but hasn’t been to Coruscant before. They’re trying to get the little one to the Temple for her own safety.”

Depa considers that, and then passes the datapad to the vendor. “Lead on.”

It’s surprisingly simple, really. Fett did all the talking.

And then Depa is standing right in front of her.

“Like I said,” Fett sighs. “She froze up.”

“Hello,” Depa says, hands laced together inside her sleeves. “I don’t believe we’ve met.”

Ahsoka shakes her head. “I know of you. I’ve seen you spar. You’ve never spoken to me.”

All true. A little misleading, but it’s fine, it’s all fine.

Depa waits a moment, and then says, “You seem to have me at a disadvantage. You know my name, but I don’t know yours.”

“Sokari T-Torrent,” she manages. The words feel clunky in her mouth, the sound abrasive for all that it’s just her own voice, no different from usual. A little shaky, maybe. She can feel a cool breeze on her upper arms. Shouldn’t she have armor? She should have armor. “It... it’s been a long time since I’ve seen another Jedi. I’m having a hard time believing you’re real.”

“I see,” Depa says. “Perhaps we should take this somewhere more private? You seem a little unsteady.”

Ahsoka lets herself be led back to the ship, in the company of Mand’alor Jango Fett, Jedi Padawan Depa Billaba, Princess-General Leia Organa, and good old Captain Rex.

It’s like the start of a sick joke.

---------------------------

Fett and Depa talk where she can hear, but they rarely address her directly. Both seem to realize that she’s not particularly useful right now. Leia and Rex are pressing up against her at the little table in the galley, and Ahsoka lets them.

This is real. She can feel Depa in the Force, recognizes her energy even if it’s not quite what it will-was-could-have-been. This is happening.

It’s a textbook Traumatic Stress Response case, one of them says.

Fett has his helmet off. Ahsoka’s sure that’s wrong for some reason. She thinks he might already be on wanted lists. Should she worry about Depa trying to arrest him?

Depa asks about Rex at one point. Fett tells her that someone cloned him without his knowing, but the kid is more comfortable with Ahsoka so they’re still working on what that means for him.

It’s more or less true. Rex squeezes her hand the one time someone suggests separating them. She’s not letting that happen unless Rex wants to leave for whatever reason. They’ve worked apart before. They can do it again.

“Auntie Soka? You’re shivering.”

Is she?

Leia cuddles in closer, and Ahsoka runs a hand over her hair. It’s an absentminded motion, and for all that she knows Leia’s hair is fine as silk, it feels like plastic in the moment.

“I don’t think I’m okay,” Ahsoka announces. The words hang in the air like lead balloons, and she can feel Depa staring at her. “I haven’t been for a very long time.”

“Yeah, we noticed,” Fett says. “Do you need to lay down, Torrent?”

Does she?

“No,” she says. “I... I don’t know what I need.”

“The spicy drink,” Rex tells them. “It’s grounding.”

Right. That.

Fett goes to grab it, and Depa continues to watch.

“How long ago did you leave your master?” Depa asks. “Or... did he die?”

Ahsoka closes her eyes and shakes her head. She can feel the shivers now, tremors in her biceps and a shudder she can’t control in the height of her ribcage. Her teeth grind together, jaw like stone.

“You don’t have to answer that,” Depa assures her. “I’m... going to recommend you see a mind healer on Coruscant.”

That was a forgone conclusion.

A cup clinks onto the table. Fett’s back. “Drink.”

She does.

Depa and Fett continue discussing it as “the adults” at the table. She’s older than both of them. Rex is older than all of them. Ahsoka follows about half of what they say. She agrees with most of it. Rex bullies his way into speaking when she doesn’t, without her even asking, because he knows her mind as well as she does. Fett rolls with it. Depa lets him.

She’s going to reach out to the Temple and see about getting them a ride back to Imperial Center Coruscant.

Fett makes Soka go to bed, taking Leia with her.

---------------------------

She feels more like a person come morning.

Depa’s sitting at the table, datapad in her hands and caff on the table in front of her.

“Good morning,” Ahsoka says, rough and croaking, and Depa’s eyes flick up to meet hers. She nods a shallow hello.

“Feeling better?”

“Much,” Ahsoka says, and goes about gathering a breakfast. There’s definitely some dried meat in here. She can get something fresh when they stop by the market later.

“I was hoping to speak with you about your options,” Depa tells her, once she’s sat at the table. “Fett and your friend Rex took care of most of the negotiation, and I feel like I have an idea of what would work best for you.”

Ahsoka nods slowly. “Okay.”

“There is a Master-Padawan pair a few planets away,” Depa says. “The Council informed me when I spoke with them about you and your wards. They’d be headed back to the Temple in a few days anyway, and the Council has agreed to extend an offer to Fett to handle the transportation. The presence of a Jedi Master on board will allow for him to get in and out of the Core unmolested, and we’d like for you and yours to have a Jedi escort, given what happened yesterday afternoon.”

Her complete spiral into nonbeing?

“I understand,” she says instead. “I suppose Fett agreed because he’s still trying to get Rex to like him?”

Depa shrugs. “That part isn’t my business.”

Of course it isn’t.

“Rex can stay with me for a while, right?” Ahsoka finally asks. “I know it’s not exactly protocol, but I’m...”

“In need of a support system until you’ve seen a mind healer, and against all odds, the child is part of it,” Depa summarizes. “Yes, I recognized as much. I think the Council will be able to allow some leeway there. I don’t know if he’ll enjoy it, given that all the others his age are Initiates, but we can adjust as necessary. On that note... Do you know Leia’s midichlorian count?”

“No,” Ahsoka says, and hesitantly adds, “But her biological father was my Jedi Master, and I’m told his count broke records even as a child. Given what Leia’s shown so far... it’s why I’ve been in a hurry to get her to the Temple.”

Depa frowns at her, clearly working through the implications of a Jedi having a daughter and still teaching... and then visibly dismisses the situation, eyes closing to breathe in the steam of her caff.

Biological father certainly implies a child that was raised by her mother or adopted out so the Jedi father could remain in their chosen career without a conflict of interest or duty.

She’ll tell the council the truth, or... at least Master Koon. Master Kenobi is still a padawan, but she can tell Master Koon.

She already told Jango Fett, of all people.

“Padawan Torrent?”

Her head snaps up. She hasn’t been a padawan in over fifteen years. It’s weird to hear. “I’m sorry, what?”

“I asked if you wanted some time to think it over before I presented the offer to Fett,” Depa says.

Ahsoka gets the distinct feeling that Depa is planning a report to the Council that has ‘needs a mind healer’ underlined at least three times.

“No, I’m--I’m fine. That sounds like a good plan.”

“I’ll speak with him, then. Would you like to come with?”

"No, thank you.”

---------------------------

Fett agrees. Ahsoka’s pretty sure it’s all to do with Rex and maybe Leia. It’s probably nothing to do with ‘Sokari.’ She’s a Jedi, an adult in mind and in body, or at least close enough to count. She’s a damn sight more ‘enemy’ to Fett than the other two are. Not as much as Depa, maybe, but Fett’s been playing nice with her for Leia’s sake.

He plays nice with Ahsoka for Rex’s. That’s all.

They’re only a few planets over from the meeting point, and they have a few days to hang around before the escort meets them. Depa hadn’t given them a name--apparently it could have compromised the opsec for the Jedi team--but Ahsoka’s pretty sure she’ll be able to identify almost anyone. She gets the feeling that the Force is going to send her a familiar face, just as it did Master Padawan Billaba.

Ahsoka lets herself feel the world around her. It’s dark and dreary, in the sense that the beaten-down port is full of petty crimes and less petty horrors, but it’s still lighter than most of the Empire had been. She sneaks away from the ship at night, ignoring Fett at her back, and performs a bit of vigilante justice while she can. She’ll be banned from doing so as soon as she’s reinstated as a Jedi, probably, but for now... for now, she can look at the drug cartels and ‘they’re not slaves, really’ workers and do something to help.

She doesn’t use her sabers. She doesn’t need to. It’s been a long time since she has, for small fry like these.

“What are you doing?” Fett asks her, landing heavily behind her back.

“Chip removal,” she says, hand pressed to the slave’s leg. Her eyes are closed, but she can hear him shifting. “Let me concentrate, I don’t have a meddroid for this.”

He’s silent until she finishes, and waits until the people she’s helped are on their way to the planet’s freedom routes. He doesn’t ask what she did with the owners.

“You’ve done this before.”

“Regularly,” she confirms. “You?”

He doesn’t answer that, just ambles over to the the chains and stares down at them.

“Fett?”

“You go through this like it’s as easy as breathing,” he says. “It’s... impressive.”

“I guess?” she hesitates to continue. “I’m... I don’t think of it that way. This is the easy stuff. A time-waster that helps people. If I wanted to help for real, I’d been going after Jabba or Sidious or--”

“How old were you?” he asks, turning on his heel to face her dead-on. The vocoder of his helmet pulls the emotion from his voice. “When did this... these missions, the slavery battles, when did that start for you?”

“Fourteen,” she says. She’s not entirely sure, really, what counted as a mission for ending slavery and what counted as just a part of war, but she can round down. “Maybe fifteen. It’s a bit of a blur.”

“And you just kept doing it.”

“Of course,” she says. “If I have the time and the energy, if I need to do something and there’s nothing official on my hands, why not?”

He doesn’t answer her.

---------------------------

Rex greets them before she does.

Ahsoka, in her defense, is asleep at the time. It’s a restless sleep, but it’s enough that she doesn’t sense the nearing Force signatures until they’re almost at the ship.

She recognizes one of them.

“Auntie ‘Soka?” Leia questions, when she lurches to her feet and starts pulling on her boots with all the energy of a zombie. “Where are you going?”

“Jedi,” Ahsoka grunts. “Here.”

“I see.”

Leia dresses to follow her, in a little coat that’ll withstand the chill of the outside air, and Ahsoka makes it to the cargo hold just in time to hear Rex saying, “I’m not shaking your hand until you put your gloves on, Vos.”

She laughs to herself, breathless with the knowledge of what she’s about to find. She jumps the railing of the upper walkway, drops down just in front of the Master-Padawan team, and keeps her back to Fett and Rex. “Hello, there.”

One human, one Kiffar. She knows the latter.

“Would you be Sokari Torrent?” the Master asks.

“I am,” she says, with a slight bow. She can tell there’s a bit of judgement for how she’s dressed, but they’re covering it well. A Shadow and his trainee know the value of armor better than most Jedi bother with. “I’m afraid Padawan Billaba didn’t inform me of your names before we met.”

“And yet your friend knew my padawan,” the Master says.

“By reputation,” she says, as smoothly as she can. “I’ve encountered Quinlan Vos before, though I doubt he remembers--”

“I’d remember someone like you,” Quinlan interrupts, with a grin she’s sure is meant to be charming and rogueish.

He’s... very young for her, and not her type. Mostly, she wants to pat him on the head, but that probably wouldn’t go over very well. She still looks like she’s younger than him.

“Anyway,” she says, turning back to the master, “I’m afraid I still don’t know who you are, Master.”

“I am Tholme,” he says, with the bow that a Master gives a Padawan. She feels a little slighted, but it’s fine. She looks the right age, it’s fine.

It’s not like they know.

“It’s nice to meet you, Master Tholme,” she says. “My charges are Rex Torrent, the young man behind me, and currently coming down the ladder is Leia Antilles. I’m sure you’re aware of Jango Fett.”

“The Mand’alor,” Quinlan volunteers, and Ahsoka can almost hear Fett’s teeth grinding.

“Don’t call me that,” he says. She’s sure he’s got a hand drifting for his blaster.

“There isn’t a whole lot of room on the ship,” she says before the men can get into whatever weird contest she’s sure someone might start. Her bet’s on Fett. “But Leia and Rex are small enough to share with me, so I’m sure we can make it work.”

“There’s spare rolls for anyone comfortable with sleeping in the hold,” Fett grunts. “Or on the floor in the passenger room.”

“Well, I guess I could ask for a little help fi--”

“Vos,” Ahsoka snaps, letting her voice take on the kind of ‘obey me or get fresher duty’ irritation that she’d perfected back when the rebellion still had her managing people, before they’d realized she was more use in the field. “Do not.”

There’s a moment’s pause, and Tholme looks unimpressed with that raised eyebrow, but the kind of unimpressed that’s split between his own padawan and the stranger before him.

“Um,” Quinlan says. “I just--”

“No,” she cuts him off. “No flirting.”

It’s weird and uncomfortable and she’d have maybe been okay with it if she was actually the seventeen-or-eighteen-ish(?) that she looked, but she’s not. She’s in her thirties and Vos is... what, twenty? Twenty-one? No.

He stares at her, and she wonders momentarily if she’d gone too far in the direction of judging his intentions in the Force and preempted actual flirtations.

“I’m sorry?” He offers, looking confused, but ashamed. “I, uh, I’ll keep that in mind.”

She definitely preempted the actual flirtation.

Fuck.

Ahsoka closes her eyes and breathes in. Breathes out. Opens her eyes. “Right. That was... I’m not sure how much Padawan Billaba told you about me.”

“Enough,” Tholme says. He moves forward and puts a hand on Quinlan’s shoulder. Ahsoka has no idea if it’s to comfort him or hold him back. “I didn’t share most of it with my padawan, but I have a general understanding of what’s going on.”

Quinlan darts a look at his teacher, but Ahsoka doesn’t acknowledge it. It’s fine. Everything is fine.

“Thank you for your understanding,” she says, and bows, and stiffly turns away to walk to the galley.

---------------------------

Leia squirms into the bench seat, shoving her way under Ahsoka’s arm like a particularly wriggly tooka.

“What was that?” Leia demands, the authority of a rebellion general rather useless in the squeaky voice of a child.

“What was what?”

“The whole thing with Padawan Vos,” Leia says. “You blew up at him before he even did anything.”

That’s pretty true.

“I felt the flirtation coming before it happened and reacted inappropriately because I panicked. I’m significantly older than him, but I can’t tell him that, so it’s just awkward and uncomfortable and... I’m not okay, Princess. I haven’t been for a long time.”

“Yeah, we can tell.”

“Leia.”

“What? I need therapy too! Captain Rex needs therapy! I’m pretty sure Fett needs therapy! You, Fulcrum, you really need therapy. None of us are okay.” She huffs, wiggling impossibly closer. “I don’t like it, but it’s true.”

“I know,” Ahsoka groans. “I just... I just need to hold out until the Temple.”

“Will you be able to hold it together if you see someone you actually care about?” Leia demands. “What are you going to do when you see Kenobi?”

“Stop.”

“I’m serious, you--”

“Leia, that’s enough,” she snaps. “I was fighting that war before you were even born, and I’ve dealt with the consequences since. I know the risks and I’ll thank you to remember who taught you to control your own mind.”

Leia stiffens, sucking in a sharp breath. “That was uncalled for.”

“You’re not the child you appear to be,” Ahsoka reminds her, not a little sharply. “You want to dish it out, be ready to take it. What will you do when we see Bail Organa? When we see the toddler that is Anakin Skywalker?”

“I get it.”

“I’m not sure you do,” Ahsoka mutters. She isn’t surprised when Leia ducks out of the embrace and leaves the galley. She lets the girl go, guilt warring with the memory of how Master Kenobi had more than once spoken that way to Anakin at the height of the war. The fact that she’s an adult in the body of a child isn’t an excuse for poking at Ahsoka’s open wounds. It was cruel and unnecessary, and unbecoming of a... not a Jedi. A princess. A politician.

She rests her head on her arms and zones out. She should meditate, but that seems like... too much effort.

She can feel Vos and Tholme setting up in the room they’ve been assigned. Neither seems particularly angry. Most likely, Tholme’s given the absolute shortest explanation of ‘child soldier, dead master, highly traumatized and emotionally unstable’ to Vos to smooth over the incident in the cargo hold. Rex is with Leia; he’s agitated, but less so than Leia herself. Fett’s annoyed, in the cockpit, but he seems annoyed as often as not. There’s a shudder at lift-off, and a few minutes later, they’re in hyperspace, headed for the Core.

Fett finds her, falls into the other bench in full armor, and drops his elbows onto the table. The helmet clunks down a moment later.

She doesn’t lift her head. “What do you want?”

“Do I need to keep Vos away from you?”

“What?”

“Vos. He made you uncomfortable. Was that him being someone that hurt you in the future, or just the interaction being awkward?”

She lifts her head. She stares at him. “What?”

He leans back and crosses his arms. “Do you need me to tell Vos to stay the hell away from you?”

She’s gaping. “You realize I’m thirty-two, right? I can handle my own battles.”

“You’re also traumatized as hell and everyone can see it,” Fett argues back. “If Vos himself is a trigger, I can handle it.”

“He’s not,” she tells him. This is strange. Fett’s being strange. “He was actually a friend of my grandmaster’s. I’m just uncomfortable with the flirting because I’m a lot older than he realizes, and I can’t tell him that.”

He nods sharply, and then looks away. The silence sits.

“Thanks for asking?” Ahsoka says, well aware of how her confusion over the offer turns it into a question. “I mean, thank you for... caring.”

I guess, she finishes in the privacy of her own head. Or at least pretending to.

Fett makes a face, still not facing her. He eyes the galley instead. She can guess where his thoughts are going. The galley is... not very big, especially with six people on board instead of one, but she’s sure they’ve stocked up enough. On the off chance they do go through more than expected, because of how many growing bodies are in residence, they can stop off and buy more. They have those resources now.

Jango never does ask what she did with the slavers.

“Who’s going to cry if I spice things properly?” he asks.

“Probably Leia,” she says immediately. “Vos will try to power through it even though he’s going to be overwhelmed. No idea about Tholme, but I think he’ll keep a straight face whether he likes it or not. Rex and I are fine, ‘hot’ was pretty much the only flavor of seasoning the GAR had.”

“GAR?”

“Grand Army of the Republic.”

He finally looks at her.

“You already knew I was a child soldier, Fett; don’t act surprised.”

“That doesn’t mean I like hearing about it.”

“I was fourteen. That’s old enough by Mando standards, Fett. Just think back, when did you get on the battlefield?”

“I take your point,” he says, lip curling unpleasantly. “It just hits different now that I’m old enough to look back and think of how damned young fourteen really is.”

Ahsoka shrugs. “Yeah, well--”

“You said the clones were ten.”

There’s the rub, isn’t it?

Of course it was about the clones.

“...closer to seven, by the end. Kamino was just making speedies at that point. Triple growth on the average instead of double, but averages in that case meant they’d been growing at double rates for six years and then got forced through four growth cycles in a single year to beef up the army when we kept losing men.” She looks down at the table, picking at a scratch in the plastipaint with her nail. “Rex and the rest of the ones from the beginning were basically twenty in mind and body, even if they’d only been decanted ten years earlier. The speedies... I always wondered. They’d gone from functionally twelve to functionally twenty in a year. That’s not... even in Kamino, that can’t have been normal. They didn’t act like adults, not the way the originals did.”

Fett rubs at his face, groaning. He swears under his breath in three different languages.

She pities him, if only because he hasn’t actually done any of this yet. He’s paying for the crimes of a man he likely won’t ever become.

She kicks him under the table. “Wanna make tiingilar and see how long it takes Vos to start crying while he insists it’s fine?”

---------------------------

Dinner is when the questions start. Some are relatively easy. Others, not so much.

“My Master was Leia’s biological father,” is an easy truth to share. “She inherited his power, so I need to get her to the temple for her own safety, because home no longer is.”

“Yes, her adoptive parents were unfortunately killed rather recently. We’d prefer not to talk about it.”

“Rex is with me. Where he goes, I go, and vice versa.”

That one gets her an odd look.

“I thought...” Quinlan trails off, gesturing between Rex and Fett.

Fett keeps his face impassive, but his discomfort and guilt leak into the Force. “I didn’t know Rex existed until I ran into these three in a spaceport cantina a few weeks ago.”

Quinlan blinks at him, looks at Rex again, and then turns back to Fett with a grin that might have been described as ‘saucy’ if he were less smug about it. “Wild oats, huh?”

“Are you shitting me right now,” Leia whispers, and Ahsoka elbows her.

“That was inappropriate, padawan.”

Quinlan’s grin fades as Fett just continues to eye him.

“Um, so--”

“How old is the kid?” Fett interrupts.

Darting eyes answer him, as Quinlan tries to gauge Rex. “Ten? Maybe twelve?”

“And how old am I?”

“...early thirties?”

“I’m twenty-seven.”

Quinlan’s grin fades further as he does the math.

“I’d have been between fifteen and seventeen when he was born,” Fett says, tone flat. “Between fourteen and sixteen at conception. I know damn well I wasn’t doing anything that could have resulted in a kid at that age.”

Quinlan rallies. “So, brothers?”

Tholme sighs loudly, hand over his eyes.

“I’m a clone,” Rex says, and Ahsoka can feel the amusement he gets out of Quinlan’s confused shock. They’d both had plenty of respect for Master Vos, but Padawan Vos was nothing but trouble. “Harvested genetic material, grown in a tube, inconsistent aging meaning I don’t even know how old I am for sure.”

“I broke him out,” Ahsoka adds, which is half true.

“There was a chip in my head,” Rex adds, with a bright smile. Quinlan’s discomfort grows. “She got it out. Also, lots of brothers. None of them are... around anymore. The creators were trying to make an army.”

Vos and Tholme have no response. Fett looks like he’s been carved out of stone. Leia’s just ignoring them and picking at her food.

Ahsoka lifts a hand and, without looking, Rex high-fives her.

---------------------------

“Drop your elbow.”

Ahsoka tries to cover her smile at the dirty look that Leia shoots Fett. Fett remains unimpressed by the glare of royalty, just gestures for the girl to do as he said.

“I know how to fight,” Leia grumbles. “I took lessons. I was good at them.”

“And I’m better,” Fett says, leaving no room for argument. “You want the Torrents to take over?”

The Torrents. Rex and Soka. She likes being referred to that way. Like they’re a team that never got split up.

Force, she wished they’d never gotten split up.

“Again,” Fett orders, and Leia moves through the Mandalorian kata with ill grace in her emotions and all grace in her sweeping limbs.

Well, as much grace as an undersized six-year-old can, at any rate.

“Think he’ll ask me to spar her again?” Rex asks, dropping down into the seat next to Ahsoka and passing her a drink.

“Maybe,” she acknowledges. “I think he’s wondering if it’s worth asking Vos to spar with her, so she gets more experience with size differences.”

“Hm?”

“She flinched at his face again,” she tells him. “The whole... thing with Boba, I guess. She still won’t tell me why Fett triggers her sometimes, but he’s not pressing her to spar with him, and there’s only so much she can get out of fighting me. Asking Tholme would be presumptuous, but Vos is just a padawan. I think it’d work out.”

“And you?”

She looks at him, already feeling a cresting wave of bullshit she doesn’t want to deal with. “What about me?”

“Are you going to spar with the Jedi?”

She should. She hasn’t sparred with a saber since she got tossed back into a body only half-familiar to her. She’s let Leia borrow the shorter one to learn some basic blocking moves, Shii-Cho and then, with hesitance, the first Soresu form. Another time, she loaned it to Rex to practice some attacks; they both know that the next time he picks up her saber in battle, having lost his weapons or she her grip, it will be neither the first or last time he wields a sword of light. None of that, however, is... sparring.

None of that is against someone who knows what they’re doing.

How long has it been since she sparred with anyone other than Kanan and Ezra?

How long has it been since she sparred without the looming specter of Darth Vader in the back of her mind, without fear of the Inquisitors, without the knowledge that any saber held by someone other than her two friends would be red as blood and twice as drenched.

Would she be able to hold back as she fought?

“I should,” she acknowledges, eyes on where Fett is nudging Leia’s feet into position for some kind of leveraging flip. She’s so small. “It would probably be a good idea to spar against a master at some point.”

“Do you think you can?” Rex asks.

“I never knew him,” she says. “And he isn’t Dark. It should be fine.”

Rex nods, taking her word for it. They watch as Leia stumbles on a final move, and Fett gestures for her to sit down and get a drink.

“That man is a terror,” she informs them.

(She’d once described him as a slave-driver. She had not made that mistake twice.)

“Least it’s not Kamino!” Rex tells her cheerfully. When Leia refuses to look impressed, he laughs at her.

Ahsoka has a half-second’s warning before heavy boots thud to the ground next to her. “What’s Kamino?”

“Hello, Vos, it’s nice to see you too,” she drawls. “I’m good, thanks for asking, and yourself?”

The boy-not-quite-man rolls his eyes. “Hi, Torrents; hi, tiny one.”

Leia glares at him next.

“So, Kamino?”

“Planet by Rishi,” Rex says.

“Why were you there?”

“They specialize in cloning.”

Ahsoka covers her mouth as the conversation drops into the same awkward gap that always happens when Quinlan stumbles into a subject he didn’t know to avoid.

“Like... you were made there, or you were researching how it works for your own--”

Ahsoka slaps a hand over his mouth. “Now’s a great time to stop talking.”

He licks her palm.

She bares her teeth and arches her fingers just enough to press nails into his cheek.

He bites at her palm, and she yanks her hand away.

“You’re all children,” Leia accuses, conveniently forgetting that Ahsoka and Rex are both over a decade older than her.

“I can throw you the length of a swimming pool,” Ahsoka tells her. “One of the fancy competition-ready ones that would make a Tatooinian cry. You are absolutely the child here.”

“Using the Force is cheating, sir,” Rex informs her.

“Only if there’s a competition,” Ahsoka shoots back. “And proving that a certain princess is a small child is not a competition. It’s a declarative fact.”

“I’m going to rip open the seams on all your tops except the ugliest one,” Leia decides.

“Try me,” Ahsoka challenges. “Adi’ka.”

A low, rough cough interrupts them. “Are you done?”

Fett has his arms crossed, and an eyebrow raised. He knows they’re all adults here, and is entirely unamused. As the silence drags, the eyebrow climbs a little higher.

“Done with what?” Quinlan finally asks, thereby volunteering himself to spar in hand-to-hand with Jango Fett, as one does.

“Poor, poor Vos,” Rex laughs, watching as Fett barks out orders at Quinlan every five seconds to fix his footwork, to stop dropping his guard, to stop wasting energy on flips instead of just dodging the easy way.

“Throw him!” Ahsoka calls. To her delight, Fett obliges.

The thing is, Quinlan isn’t bad at brawling. He’s got training, endurance, skill. The man knows what he’s doing, objectively. He’s just not a match for Fett, and is used enough to relying on his saber that his hand-to-hand skills are rusty. They are perhaps less rusty than those Jedi who don’t take questionable jobs in the Mid-Outer Rim, and Ahsoka’s got a suspicion that Vos regularly gets into bar fights in his downtime, but none of that is enough for him to actually do more than survive against Fett without his saber.

Even the saber wouldn’t help, if Fett had his armor.

“Whose idea was this?”

Ahsoka cranes her head back and smiles. “Hello, Master Tholme. Vos... volunteered.”

“Did he know he was volunteering?”

“No comment.”

Tholme snorts, crossing his arms and eyeing the spar in front of him. “I thought Fett hated Jedi. Giving us a ride for the sake of you three is one thing, but why is he teaching my padawan?”

Ahsoka shrugs. “Constructive bullying?”

There’s a small twitch of a smile, quickly gone. “He said something wrong, I’m guessing?”

“There was no way he could have known,” she dismisses. “We’re just, like, ninety-percent tragic backstories.”

“You’d think the Force would warn him,” Rex notes.

“That’s not how the Force works,” Leia chides.

“No, no, he’s right,” Ahsoka corrects. “The Force does sometimes step in to stop a person from saying something stupid. However, Padawan Vos is at an age where people think they are very rational while being more irrational than they likely ever will be again.”

“Do I want to ask what you were doing at that age?” Tholme asks.

“Running bla...” she trails off, then whips around to gape at him.

He smiles, bland and unassuming. “Does Fett know?”

“Know... what?” Ahsoka asks.

“That you’re significantly older than you look,” he says, voice just low enough that the sparring duo can’t hear him. “All three of you.”

Ahsoka turns back to the spar, only catching Tholme out of the corner of her eye. “He knows.”

“Mm. Were you planning on telling the Council?”

“Yes.” That part was never in question. “How did you figure it out?”

“I am a good investigator,” he says. “And you rely a little too heavily on your physical forms to obfuscate. Were it just one of you, that wouldn’t be a problem, but the pattern repeated across three is a little easier to discern.”

“I hoped the whole ‘child soldiers’ thing would be a bigger distraction,” Ahsoka mutters. She glances at Leia and Rex. Both of them are used to being in charge to some degree, giving orders and making contingency plans, but in this... in this, Ahsoka is in charge. They’d decided that at the very start. It didn’t matter that Rex had lived longer and had more experience, or that Leia had held the highest Rebellion rank of the three of them. Ahsoka had been agreed as leader, and they were relying on her.

They’re waiting on her orders. Stiff and unhappy, in Leia’s case, but they trust her.

“Will you be telling Vos?” She asks.

“No,” Tholme says. “Your secrets remain your own unless they endanger us, and I’ve a feeling they won’t be.”

“Don’t be so sure,” Rex jokes, smile not reaching his eyes. “I’ve been working with this family for too long to trust that trouble won’t find them around the next corner.”

“This family?” Tholme repeats.

“Sokari was telling the truth about her master being Leia’s biological father,” Rex says. He shrugs. “I worked with him, with his wife, with both of his kids, with his master and his padawan. All of them, to a one, are trouble magnets.”

“Ah, but that’s not the secret that’s putting us in danger,” Tholme points out. “Simply existence as a Jedi.”

Rex shrugs. “Fair enough. Don’t say I didn’t warn you, though.”

Ahsoka lurches to her feet, turning with a smile and dancing backward into the the stretch of empty cargo hold they used for such things. “A spar, Master Tholme?”

He looks past her, to Quinlan, and raises a brow. “Would you not prefer to spar with someone a little closer to your level first?”

She barks out a laugh. “Master Tholme, I’m afraid I’ve spent more of my life fighting to survive than having normal friendly spars. My style is more lethal than the average, and you’ve already seen what war’s done to my mind. I ask to spar with you because, if I lose control, if I slip in time or react on an instinct that isn’t appropriate, I trust that you’ll be more able to stop me than a senior padawan.”

He smiles. “Yes, I gathered as much. Still, better to ask. Shall we wait for them to finish up?”

Ahsoka shrugs, turns, and yells. “Clear the deck!”

Rex snorts behind her, and lowly mutters, “Sir, yes, sir.”

She smirks at him over her shoulder. “At ease, Captain.”

“That’s ‘Commander’ to you, I got promoted,” he sniffs, chin held high.

Heavy steps herald Fett’s arrival at their little group. “The hells are you doing?”

“I’m going to have a spar with a Jedi Master, and I want you and Vos to not get stabbed.”

“I’m not that easy to injure in an actual fight, let alone by accident,” Fett grouses. He looks up and over at Vos, who is already significantly taller, if a fair shot less built. “This one, on the other hand...”

“Hey!”

Ahsoka laughs and backs into the center of the cargo hold, drawing her sabers. “Don’t worry, Vos, I won’t play dirty. You’ll probably get your master back in one piece.”

He wrinkles his nose at her. “Getting a bit ahead of yourself there, aren’t you? He’s a Jedi Master and former Watchman. You’re... what, eighteen?”

Ahsoka raises a brow and activates her sabers, tapping the blades together and watching as more than one person winces. “Wanna bet on how long I last?”

“No,” he says immediately, stepping back to join Rex on the bench. “You’ve already blindsided me enough. I’m not dumb enough to fall for whatever you’ve got up your sleeve.”

“I don’t have sleeves.”

“Armwarmers-slash-greaves, then.”

“Greaves go on the legs, these are vambraces.”

He throws his hands up in the air. “I’m just going to stop talking now!”

“Good plan,” Leia snarks, and then literally hisses when Rex ruffles her hair.

Tholme lights his saber and sinks into an opening stance.

Ahsoka mirrors him.

---------------------------

She wins, but barely. She's had a few weeks to practice her forms, has sparred hands-only with Rex and Fett, but this is her first real try at using her sabers against a person, instead of a blaster or thin air, since she arrived in the past. She’s only mostly adjusted to her body.

But Tholme is a healer and a watchman, not a duelist. Ahsoka held her own against Ventress, against Grievous, against Maul when she was this age. Still adjusting to her body or not, her lineage is one of battle, and it bled true.

“You’re terrifying,” Quinlan tells her after they’re done, smiling like the sun as he hands her a towel. “Please never turn that on me.”

She laughs at him. “Would you believe that I’m out of practice?”

“Out of practice with what?” he asks, horrified and fascinated. “Fighting Sith Lords?”

“Among other things,” she says, and smirks when he chokes on his drink. “Multiple darkside users who claimed to be Sith, at least. One being a full Lord, one that was disowned by his master, and one that was apprenticed to a Banite apprentice, so she wasn’t technically allowed to be a Darth because of the rule of two.”

Tholme meets her eyes past Quinlan’s shoulder, head tilted and eyes half-shut in consideration. He’s taking her seriously. He knows what she’s not saying.

“How...” Quinlan trails off and shakes his head. “You know what, no. Asking you people questions never ends well.”

“Good plan,” Ahsoka says, clapping a hand down on his shoulder. “Also, you need to spar with Fett more. Your footwork is shit.”

“It is not,” Quinlan gripes. “You’re all just scary good at this stuff.”

“You mean surviving?” Leia pipes up, and smiles innocently when Quinlan turns to pout at her.

“You’re getting bullied by a six-year-old,” Rex informs him.

“Yeah,” Quinlan sighs. “I know.”

Ahsoka laughs, and it’s fine. It’s all fine. For a week, everything is honestly great. She trains, she laughs, she works through the nightmares.

Then fucking Denon happens.

---------------------------

Denon is a city-planet on the intersection of two major hyperlanes. It’s the kind of place where they stop for two things:

Fuel.

Paperwork.

Technically, there’s a whole mess of paperwork they have to fill out to continue along this specific hyperlane, since they aren’t official Republic ships, and don’t have the licenses to just pass along like ships that are pre-registered to the Trade Federation or the like. They could sneak past--literally all of them know smuggler’s routes--but it’s honestly less of a pain to do things legally. They have a Jedi Master. They have cash. Some of that cash wasn’t quite legally acquired, but nobody needs to know that.

It’s supposed to be a pit stop. That’s all.

It’s just a pit stop.

But no, the galaxy isn’t that kind and Ahsoka’s luck is currently being compounded with a Skywalker, two Fetts, and Vos, which means that of course they run into trouble. Of course they do. There was never any other option, was there?

“Motherfucker,” Ahsoka snaps, lifting her head up and slamming her drink on the table.

The glass is empty. That’s good. They’re in a restaurant right now, a little splurging after weeks with only each others’ company, and spilling the sugary child-friendly juice with that move would have drawn way too much attention from the servers.

“Language,” Tholme says, voice idly unconcerned.

“Sir?” Rex asks, kicking Ahsoka under the table. “What’s wrong?”

“What’s wr--that jackass,” she hisses, getting to her feet. “Rex, grab a blaster, I’ve got shebs to kick.”

“Okay,” Rex says, grabbing one out of Fett’s holster and scooting out of the booth before anyone can tell him not to. “Whose?”

“I didn’t even know that he was... osik, I don’t have jurisdiction,” she realizes. “I don’t have any record of wrongdoing. I can’t arrest him since we don’t have evidence of criminal wrongdoing...”

“Are you two going to explain what’s going on?” Vos asks. “Or sit down, maybe?”

Ahsoka makes her decision. She eyes the window--the restaurant in question is a little dingy, but it’s also several dozen stories in the air. “Rex, remember the thing we did on Geonosis that you hated?”

He pauses, and then sighs heavily. “Yes, sir. I remember the... yeeting.”

Hah. That slang doesn’t even exist yet.

“Great. With me!”

It’s a good thing the windows are forcefields instead of transparisteel. A bit of a twist to the energy and they’re gone.

She only hears a little screaming before the wind tears all noises away while they plummet.

They land lightly--of course--and Ahsoka wraps them both in a don’t notice me aura. Nobody even notices that they’ve just come from above. It’s great that she can just Do These Things again, and get brushed off as Weird Jedi Shit, instead of worrying about the Empire. She’s missed being able to jump out of windows without fear.

Rex follows her as she starts running through the city. They don’t have comms, and he’s still so small, which means he can’t keep up with her even if she runs at normal speeds without Force enhancement.

“Should you carry me?” he asks, before she can figure out if it’s worth suggesting. She did it a few times before they joined up with Jango.

“It’s not... urgent, I think,” she says. She hesitates to speak, even as she keeps jogging with Rex at her heels. “Honestly, I’m trying to figure out if there’s anything I can ding him for so we can attack him. It’s all well and good that I can beat him right now, but all the crimes I know about haven’t happened yet, so it wouldn’t be legal...”

“Commander?”

“Hm?”

“I have no idea who you’re talking about.”

She scrolls the conversation back mentally, considers, and says, “Oh.”

“Who’s getting steamrolled?”

“Uh, Maul’s here,” Ahsoka admits.

“Ah,” Rex says. He makes a face. “I understand the desire to jump out a window, now. I don’t agree with it, but I understand.”

Ahsoka laughs. “I mean, I just... every time I’ve seen him for almost twenty years, it’s been like... on sight, you know? We’ve never not attacked each other, except when I needed him to cause problems on Mandalore. But I always knew I was in the right, then.”

“So... what do we arrest him for?” Rex prompts.

“Um... carrying a lightsaber without a license?” she hazards. “We’ll need Tholme there. Hopefully I can just shout at him and he’ll attack me, but I think he only went full nutjob after Master Kenobi cut his legs off. He might be too controlled to try to kill me just for yelling at him.”

“...do we have to stalk him?” Rex asks, sounding like he’d most likely sigh if he weren’t mid-run.

She scoops him up and swings him around onto her back before she answers. “I think we have to stalk him, Rex’ika.”

“Don’t call me that.”

---------------------------

Maul is... exceptionally sneaky, actually. Either that, or he hasn’t done anything wrong yet. Ahsoka’s betting on the former, because she’s seen this particular skocha kung take over a planet before anyone realized he was the most dangerous person around.

Or maybe he’s just not committing crimes, and is in fact just here to buy groceries.

He’s examining a papaya.

She fantasizes about jumping across the market and greeting him with a heel to the cheekbone.

“Are you imagining a flying kick, Sir?”

“Yeah...”

“He’s examining a papaya, Sir.”

“I know...”

“Does he know we’re here?”

“I don’t know. Maybe? Do you think I should go hit him?”

“No.”

“Should I hit on him?”

“No, Sir. I would not advise that.”

“He’s looking at the neloms.”

“I can see that.”

“Why does he have to be so bo--did he just fucking bite a nelom?”

“It appears so, Sir.”

“Like... like rind and all. Just bit the little fucker.”

“Seems it.”

A scuff of metal. “What the fuck are you two doing?”

Ahsoka tips her head around to peer through the grate. “We’re spying, Fett, what does it look like we’re doing?”

Rex cranes his head. “We’re hanging upside-down from a fire escape to get a look at a suspected Sith Apprentice that is currently shopping for various fruits, Mand’alor.”

Ahsoka waves. “Hi, Master Tholme.”

“Sokari,” the master greets. “This seems a very conspicuous way to spy.”

She shrugs as well as she can from this angle. “Yes, but you see, this way’s more fun.”

“Is it now.”

Rex shifted. “He’s on the move!”

“To kill someone?!”

“No, to the deli meats.”

“Kriff.”

---------------------------

Apparently, Tholme and Fett had told Quinlan to take care of Leia, as Leia had wanted to finish her juice and refused to get involved in the Torrents’ nonsense. According to her, if they couldn’t be bothered to explain the nonsense, they didn’t need her.

This was true and accurate.

Quinlan shows up while they’re still stalking Maul, having moved to a low rooftop for a decent vantage point with less likelihood of being spotted. He’s giving Leia an eopie-back ride, and the pout on her face at needing it is adorable. She pouts harder when she sees them.

“Are you even trying to hide?” Leia scoffs.

“Not really,” Ahsoka admits. She’s got Fett’s binoculars out. “I’m not sure he’s caught wind of the fact that we’re here yet.”

“Or he has and he’s just biding his time to escape while we’re distracted,” Tholme points out.

“Meh,” Ahsoka says, avidly devouring the visual that is a teenage Maul glaring at leafy vegetables. “I just want him to do something so I have an excuse to beat his ass.”

“Do I get to know who?” Quinlan asks, setting Leia down on the roof. “Or are we going to keep being completely unwilling to share information?”

“Baby Sith Lord,” Ahsoka says. “He’s fifteen. A child.”

“A baby,” Rex agrees.

“You’re... that’s... ugh,” Quinlan groans as loudly and as dramatically as he dares, flopping down to the rooftop. “Master Tholme, please tell me this isn’t a real Sith.”

“He’s Dark,” Tholme confirms. “Sith is... up for debate until we have evidence.”

“He’s a bitch is what he is,” Ahsoka mutters. She observes the teenager in question stop to poke at some pink tomatoes. “E chu ta, break the law, already!”

“Does he have a lightsaber?” Quinlan asks. “If he has a lightsaber and no Jedi ID or specialty license, we can probably arrest him.”

“Auntie Soka doesn’t have a license or ID,” Leia points out.

“She’s got a Jedi escort,” Tholme says. “And if our supposed Sith is polite and plays nice, we can probably escort him to the Temple as well.”

Rex snorts derisively.

“Do you know why he’s on Denon?” Fett asks.

“No clue,” Ahsoka admits. “Evil reasons, probably.”

“You’re useless,” Leia tells her.

“Thanks, princess, how’s that attempt to open the jam jar by yourself coming?”

Leia says something very inappropriate for a princess, for a child, and for a lady. It’s fairly appropriate for a soldier, which is admittedly what she’s been for a few years now. Ahsoka sticks her tongue out at the girl like the mature operative she is.

“I wish we could still get him to lose his osik by just showing up and insulting him,” Rex mutters, low enough that Quinlan probably can’t hear.

“I wanna punch him in the face,” Ahsoka confesses. “I want him to try to punch me in the face, and fail.”

“Don’t bully the baby Sith,” Rex admonishes.

“He’s a Sith.”

“He’s fifteen, it’s tacky.”

“But it’s Maul.”

“I know, but you’re tw--significantly older than him.”

“But... but it’s the motherfucker himself.”

“...you can bully him a little, but only because he’s a Sith.”

Fett steals the binoculars. “You can borrow them again when you stop acting like children.”

“I don’t know what you mean,” Rex says, dry as Ryloth. “I’m ten.”

“Pretty tall for your age,” Ahsoka mutters, and then giggles.

“Don’t steal my jokes,” Rex says. He elbows her, hard.

“You know,” Quinlan says, slow and tired. “Master Tholme and I are trained investigators.”

Ahsoka and Rex look at each other, and then up at him.

“Okay?”

“...do you want me to find actual evidence of this guy doing something criminal?”

“Oh, yes please.”

---------------------------

Quinlan, as it turns out, is not overselling his skills. He does catch Maul doing something illegal later that day. It’s a little more ‘stealing corporate secrets in the dead of night’ and less ‘torturing people for kicks,’ but it’s still enough to legally arrest him. Quinlan attempts to do so.

Quinlan does not succeed, and is forced to jump out a window to avoid getting cut in half. Maul follows, steals a passing speeder by throwing out the driver, and takes off. Someone--looks like Tholme--drops back to save the driver, but the rest of them give chase. Ahsoka gleefully takes point on that, of course. She’s the best pilot.

(Rex looks bored, but someone is likely to puke by the end of the night. She hopes it’s not Leia, who insisted on coming for some fucking reason.)

“How the kriff is a teenager that good?!” Quinlan yells, clinging to the edge of the speeder to avoid getting tipped out as Ahsoka swerves around a corner with a wild laugh.

“He’s a Sith!” Leia shouts over the wind. “What do you think?”

Quinlan is not impressed by the claim of Sith.

Ahsoka screeches as she drifts across four lanes of traffic and into an alleyway to pursue Maul. He’s pretty good at dodging cross-building walkways, but she’s better. She bares her teeth, hissing, and tries to pick a plan.

“Vos, how’s your aim with Force throws?” She calls to the backseat.

“Uh, decent?”

“Great! Fett’s the projectile!”

Vos takes a second longer to process that than Jango does.

“I’m wh--”

He cuts off, screaming, and is flung forward by Quinlan to crash headfirst into a teenage Sith.

“Take the wheel!” Ahsoka commands, not waiting to see who follows the order, because Fett and Maul are both getting to their feet, the other speeder is about to crash, and she’s not sure who’s going to win that fight.

She jumps from the speeder they’ve been violently dragging around Denon, and lands feet-first on Maul’s... shoulder.

Hm.

That definitely dislocated something.

“You should wear armor!” she chirps at him, drawing both sabers and grinning as he whirls to face her, eyes wide with hate.

He’s utterly silent.

That’s disturbing. Expected, but disturbing.

“Did you just throw me?” Fett demands, higher pitched than she’d normally expect.

“No, Vos threw you.”

“Because you told him to!”

“Yeah, it’s a good strategy!”

“It is not!”

“Why not? Throwing people was standard practice in the GAR.”

She can’t see his face, but she’s pretty sure he’s about ready to strangle her.

Ahsoka cannot, at that point, continue snarking with the father of her best friend, because there’s a red lightsaber coming for her throat, and she should probably worry about that. Maul’s very good at killing people and she’d like to avoid becoming part of that statistic.

As she is quickly reminded, he is... fifteen. And shorter than she’s used to. And already injured.

It’s really, really easy to take him out, actually.

At some point, the other speeder was safely recovered before it caused property damage, and their own is landing a few meters away with Vos and the kids.

“You have Force-negating cuffs, right?” Ahsoka asks.

“No, Master Tholme has them.”

“Oh,” she says, and grimaces. “I guess I’ll just... keep sitting on him then.”

Maul snarls, and she raps him on the skull. “Stop that, it’s uncivilized.”

Rex snorts.

Jango makes a noise that is incredibly frustrated with the lot of them, and turns on Rex. “Was she telling the truth?”

“About?”

“Throwing people being standard practice for the GAR.”

Rex’s face goes pained. “It was in the five-oh-first. And a few others.”

“What’s the GAR?” Quinlan asks.

“None of your damn business,” Fett snaps.

Quinlan throws his hands up in the air again. “Come on! I just proved I know what I’m doing!”

“And their tragic backstory is none of your business, prudii!”

Quinlan blinks at him, and then glances at Ahsoka. “Um.”

“He called you a shadow since your training, um, seems to be pointing in that direction,” she says as carefully as she can. “We were theorizing.”

“Wh... you actually paid attention?” Quinlan asks, looking horribly confused. “I thought I was just annoying you.”

Ahsoka laughs at him. “Oh, Vos... I’ve been running black ops for... much longer than most would guess. Trust me, I know another spy when I see them.”

She smiles as kindly as she can, because she hadn’t actually meant to make him feel left out or unwanted or... well, she’d been pretty patronizing, especially for someone seemingly younger than him. The smile does not work. Quinlan just looks kind of horrified about how young she just implied she started spy work.

Granted, she’d been sixteen for Zygerria...

Deciding to ignore him for a bit, she shifts on Maul’s back and pats him on the cheek. “Don’t worry, Baby Sith. We’re going to get you lots of nice therapy. Mind healers, no Sith tortures, all that fun stuff. Maybe some plushies.”

“You’re also getting therapy, right?” Quinlan asks. “Please say you are. I’m required for the specifics of my training and if anything you’ve said is true, I feel like you really need it and I’m scared of what’ll happen if you don’t.”

Ahsoka laughs, knowing exactly how empty it sounds. “Oh hell, if I didn’t get therapy, I imagine Kix would rise from the grave to force me into it.”

The name means nothing to anyone except Rex, and... ah, yeah, she told Fett about Kix a few weeks ago.

“No more throwing me without warning,” Fett grumbles, dropping to sit on the ground next to her. “Especially not at baby Sith Lords.”

“I am not a child!” Maul spits.

“He speaks!” Ahsoka cheers. “Aw, I knew you could do it.”

“’Soka, I told you not to bully him,” Rex complains. “It’s tacky. You’re being tacky.”

“I’m allowed to be tacky,” Ahsoka declares. “I’ve died twice, that’s, like, permission from the universe.”

“You’ve died twice?” Quinlan asks, back in ‘fascinated horror’ territory. “Wait, no, I shouldn’t ask--”

“Too late! The first time was on a planet that doesn’t exist and my Master lost his mind, killed a god, and used the good favor of another god to have me brought back to life at her expense. Not in that order.”

“I--what? No, that’s--what?”

Ahsoka smiles brightly. “You asked.”

Tholme finally shows up with the cuffs.

---------------------------

“You should eat something.”

He glares at her.

“Baby Sith Lords need to eat.”

He keeps glaring at her.

“Maul, you’ll never get big and strong and ready to kill if you don’t eat your vegetables.”

He bares his teeth.

“No, I don’t eat my veggies, but I’m a Togruta, so if I eat too many vegetables I throw up.”

Rex kicks her thigh, right on the faulds. “What did I say about bullying the Sith Lord?”

“Not to.”

“And what are you doing?”

“Making him eat his vegetables.”

“Soka.”

“Rex’ika.”

He kicks at her again. “Get up, we’re swapping out the watch.”

“But I wanted to hang out with my favorite little criminal mastermind.”

Rex drops to the floor and presses his forehead to her shoulder. “How the hell is being around this guy the first thing to make you cheer up in weeks?”

“I’m allowed to be mean to him.”

“He’s going to bite you.”

“I’ll bite back.”

Rex jabs a finger into her ribs, and she squeaks. “Go get something to eat, Commander.”

“Fine,” she huffs, rolling to her feet and moseying along to the galley. She walks in on Tholme and Fett having an argument about the ways in which Jedi and Mandalorians differ. Quinlan’s on the side, watching with wide eyes, and little Leia’s drinking a juice box at his side, tucked up under his arm and occasionally saying things to fan the flames. Ahsoka assumes she’s enjoying herself.

She opens the cooling unit, looks over the contents, and pulls out a raw leg of eopie mutton. She leans against the counter, bites into the chilled-but-not-frozen meat, and uses the back of one hand to wipe the blood off her chin. The ‘real adults’ don’t notice.

“I’m like ninety percent sure you’re doing this to mess with me but also...” Quinlan trails off, staring at her with horror. “Why?”

“A girl’s gotta eat.”

“Yeah, but all the obligate carnivores I know are like... generally holding to basic rules of courtesy when it comes to not grossing people out,” Quinlan says. “Like, I don’t chew with my mouth open. You don’t... eat in the most intimidating--did you just crack the bone with your teeth?!”

Ahsoka smirks at him, using her free hand to take away the shard of bone so she can suck out the marrow without eating the bones themselves. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but this isn’t polite society. We’re in a galley on a bounty hunter’s ship, and I’ve been living on the run or in an army for most of my life. Table manners are optional.”

“No, they’re not,” Leia orders. “Fett, it’s your ship, tell her to--”

“--and another thing!” Fett snaps at Tholme, clearly paying less than no attention to the food argument.

Ahsoka keeps on eating, trying to catch wind of where the discussion’s at. Mostly, it seems to be at ‘talking past each other.’ Neither of them seems to have fully grasped more than the absolute most basic parts of the other culture, and that’s only enough to insult each other, not actually have a constructive conversation. She’d have expected more out of Tholme, at least. He’s not exactly young.

“Hey, quick question,” she says, in a moment where both of them have paused for breath and the opportunity to seethe. “Fett, when’s the last time you worked with a Jedi, or any member of a Force-based religion, before I popped into your life?”

His nose scrunches up as he makes a face.

“And Tholme, when’s the last time you worked with anyone from the Mandalorian system?”

Tholme’s reaction isn’t any more gracious than Fett’s.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” she says. “Vos, were either of them actually interested in that conversation, or just looking for an excuse to yell?”

“Now listen here, jetiika--”

“Fett,” she snaps. “I am not a child.”

“And neither am I,” he growls right back. “This is my ship, and I damn well don’t need you treating me like a misbehaving youngling. You’ve got a problem, you bring it to my face, not get all smug about people’s tempers blowing over.”

Well, then.

She smiles thinly. “Of course.”

He stands with his arms crossed, in full armor save for the helmet. She puts aside the eopie meat and wipes her hands, smiling until she can put her hands on her hips and let it drop to a challenge.

“You know, I’m just--I’m just gonna go,” Quinlan mutters, pulling Leia out with him, the girl hanging from under one of his arms. “This, uh, this looks like a problem for... you folks. Um. Yeah.”

He sidles out.

Tholme doesn’t.

Fett rubs at the bridge of his nose, and then gestures at the table. “Sit.”

“I’d prefer not to.”

He drops his hand and glares at her. “We have another week on this ship together. We are going to have this conversation. Sit.”

She sits, right on the warm spot left behind by Quinlan and Leia. She crosses her arms, lifts a brow, and waits.

Fett takes the seat across from her. Tholme leans against the counter.

“We all know you’re older than you look,” Fett says. “I heard Tholme mention it, I know that much has been shared. You’re acting like an actual teenager, and I’ve... I’ve put up with a lot. I am trying to keep things civil, particularly with you. I’ve tried to be friendly. You’ve been fucked up since we met, fine, everyone’s got trauma. The thing where you’ve started talking shit to our faces for what seems like your own amusement? That has to stop. You’re older than me, Torrent. Fucking act like it.”

She blinks at him, slow and not exactly happy, and turns to Tholme.

The man shrugs. “I was planning to put up with it until we arrived to the temple and handed you over to some mind healers. Fett doesn’t have that kind of time.”

There’s a curdle in her stomach, defensive and angry and guilty.

“You’ve been... a bitch,” Fett finally says. “You know that. I’m not going to mince words. You’ve been holier-than-thou and rude and condescending, and aiming that at Antilles is one thing, when you’ve apparently known her since she was a toddler and taught her things. Aiming at the rest of us isn’t going to fly. We’re all adults trying to share a space. Stop acting like... just like you have been.”

There is no defense to be made that they aren’t both already aware of.

She closes her eyes and tries to strangle the burst of irrational rage.

Their accusations aren’t unfounded.

They deserve an apology.

She is in the wrong.

She’s felt freer than she had in years, and in that freedom allowed herself too much rein, let herself lace her words with barbed wires and poison instead of sparks and spices, comments that were cruel instead of just joking. Too familiar. Too comfortable.

“My behavior’s been inappropriate,” she finally says, the words clumsy and too big in her mouth. “You’re right about that. I’m sorry, and I’ll endeavor to keep a tighter rein on my less pleasant behaviors in the future.”

At least she only lashes out with words. It could be worse.

She opens her eyes, fixes her gaze on the wall behind Fett, wrestles her expression into stiff neutrality. “Am I dismissed?”

“...uh, no, not after that,” Fett says, sounding just a little horrified. “What the hell was that?”

Tholme hisses out a breath. “Let her go.”

“No, this needs to be discussed, that’s not a healthy rea--”

“Fett, let her go,” Tholme insists, low and heavy.

Fett looks between the two for a moment, seems to come to a realization he doesn’t like, and then gestures almost violently towards the door. “Fine. Go.”

She walks out, doesn’t sprint. She’s stiff. She’s controlled. She’s the one that fucked up, so it’s fine if she doesn’t feel great right now. Getting called out on one’s own failings as a person isn’t something to get upset about if the failings are real. The feelings are real and normal, but this was her fault, and so it’s up to her to fix it, and she can’t let them know it hurt her, because this was her mistake.

She goes to the cargo hold.

---------------------------

Ahsoka works out her frustrations on Fett’s punching bag. She does not augment herself with the Force, just uses raw strength and technique, ignoring the tears that press at her eyes.

She’s fine.

It’s not weird. It’s not odd. It’s not strange to not notice she’s been kind of a bitch since her mood came up with the whole Depa thing, and then Maul. She’s been mean, mostly to Vos and Fett, and nobody’s confronted her about it until now. They let her have room for her trauma, and she hadn’t reined it in. She’s just gotten worse.

‘Snippy’ she’d always been, but age apparently hadn’t fucking tempered it.

“Um.”

She catches the punching bag, breathing heavily and covered in sweat. She hasn’t worked out all the twitchy, nervous energy yet.

“Vos,” she greets, once she’s caught herself enough that her voice won’t waver. He’s on the other side of the bag, but she knows his voice. “Do you need something?”

“You’re kind of... projecting,” he tells her, drifting to where she can actually see him. “Not self-loathing, but, um, recrimination? You just don’t feel very good and I was hoping to help”

Why in all the Sith hells does he have to be nice.

“I got called out on my behavior and wasn’t ready to face the fact that I’d kriffed up,” she tells him. “I’ll be fine. And I’m... sorry. I haven’t been fair to you and was using you as an easy target for some of my ruder comments.”

“I mean, I kind of figured,” he admits, coming closer. “I’ve been tutored by Shadows before, and a lot of them act like you. I just assumed it was more of that.”

“I still shouldn’t have let myself run loose like that,” she says. “I’m... it wasn’t appropriate. I shouldn’t have let it happen.”

He shrugs, not meeting her eyes. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“No,” she says. “Not with... not with you. Or anyone other than Rex and a mind healer, really. Most of it is...”

She trails off, distantly noticing that her eyes are tearing up enough to blur her vision, and her nails are digging into the bag in a way Fett won’t appreciate.

There’s so much that beat her down, never quite breaking her, that she doesn’t even know what made her act the way she does.

“Want to spar?”

She looks over at him, wonders what he sees that makes him want to fight her when she’s visibly unstable.

He smiles, kind and easy, and it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. It’s genuine in intent, if not in energy. He wants to help. “You all keep saying I could work on my hand-to-hand. Just take off the armor so I don’t break a finger, maybe.”

“You’re serious.”

“No, I’m Quinlan.”

She’s going to wipe the floor with this boy. “You sure you wanna fight me?”

“You won’t be able to meditate until you do,” he says. He’s right, damn him. “The other option is that I go get your... vod, I think? I go get Rex and you two can talk it out since you trust him with more. I don’t want to do that, though, he’s still a kid.”

She eyes him, lips pressed together and mind awhirl with emotions and thoughts she’d tried to beat out of her head and into the bag. “Ever fought someone without the Force?”

“...yes?”

“Was it cuffs?”

“Oh, you meant me not having the Force,” he realizes. “Er, no. Is... is that something you’ve done a lot?”

She smiles at him. “You’re planning on Shadow work. That means getting captured and stripped of everything you are at some point, Force included. Unfortunately, the cuffs are in use on a very annoying Dathomirian right now, so we’ll have to make do with you shielding like your mind’s a Kessel Spice Mine.”

“...do I want to know how often you’ve been captured?”

“No, you don’t.”

When he comes at her, it’s easy to dodge. It’s easy to tap him on target points, little pokes that show she could take him out, but isn’t going to until he’s learned something. He stays grinning throughout, letting her take the lead, and he treats her like... like a knight. Like a teacher. He’s stepped back and gone from trying to impress her as a fellow padawan, to proving himself to a full knight.

She’s not sure when that change happened, or why or how, but it makes things much smoother. She wants to think that it would have even if she hadn’t gotten a wakeup call from Fett.

So she treats him the way she treated Ezra, for the year she’d spent traveling with Kanan. She treats him as a student that’s willing to learn, good but not yet great, competent but not yet ready to survive. She draws him into the kind of chest-heaving exhaustion that tells a fighter just how much energy they waste.

(Ahsoka may have had her own style, but her grandmaster had been the pinnacle of a Soresu user. She’d spent years on the frontlines of a war. She knew the worth of conserving energy, and she’d teach it to any who stepped in to challenge her.)

“Who taught you to fight like this?” He asks, when they’ve taken a handful of moments to circle each other. His steps are heavy, sure, planted. Her own are light and ready.

“Soldiers,” she says. It’s true enough.

“Not your Master?” he asks, just as he tries to kick for her upper arm. It’s a safe question. For anyone else, it would be a safe question.

But for Ahsoka, it’s another chink in the armor, after a maelstrom of emotion, a storm of self-loathing, a dervish of instability.

She doesn’t break right away.

She spirals. She fights Quinlan, but doesn’t quite see him. Her strikes get sloppy, her feet stumble. She can’t make herself meet Quinlan’s eyes, not when the scrape of his heel against the metal sounds like the rasp of a breathing machine. Her shields get fuzzy, she knows, and she leaks what she feels into the air, making it sour and thick. She doesn’t notice, because all she can see, all she can--all she can hear and feel and--

She drops to her knees and grabs at her head, trying to stop it.

“Sokari?”

She breathes. In and out, harsh and jagged but natural in a way that the damned respirator wasn’t.

Her master her teacher her brother the traitor the hound the executioner

Her face is hot. Something prickles. It might be tears.

She tries to say something, tries to say a name or a request, tries to make anything come out of her mouth that isn’t the broken wail of a woman who hasn’t let herself think about how she died.

She feels herself pulled into someone’s arms, and she can’t quite tell who, but they’re bigger than she is, and feel warm and worried. They care. They don’t understand, they’re scared, but they care.

Her hands shake, clutched to her chest and she can’t breathe she can’t make herself take in enough air to do a Force-damned thing the empire is going to feel her her shields are down and broken and her emotions are spilling and the empire is going to find HER ANAKIN IS GOING TO FIND HER AND--

“COMMANDER!”

Rex.

Rex is here.

Her breath is coming so fast that she’s hiccupping more than she’s actually inhaling. She feels small hands in gloves on either side of her face, and then her forehead presses to something warm.

Rex. A Keldabe kiss. Her brother, her partner, her other half. He’s here. He’s calm. If he’s calm, then things are fine.

“What happened?” Light voice, high voice, small and distant. Leia. Little Leia little princess Leia she’s in danger she’s in trouble Anakin will--

“Commander.”

No. Here and now. She needs to focus on here and now. Her throat feels cold. She breathes too fast, still. She can’t stop it.

“I don’t know.” That’s Vos. He was... they were doing something. He was here. Talking to her. “We were sparring, and she just--”

Right, sparring.

“I don’t know if I said something?” He offers, voice pitching up, unsure and worried. Is he the one holding her? He’s the one holding her. That’s embarrassing.

“Commander?” Rex prompts. “Commander, can you open your eyes?”

She tries. She can’t. She shakes her head.

“Soka?” he asks, voice quiet. “Where are you?”

“F-F-Fett,” she manages. It’s enough.

“And where were you?”

His voice is so soft. So worried. She held him the same way after Mandalore, after Order 66, after all his brothers, all her friends...

“Soka.”

Her mind is spinning, and suddenly all she can hear is Anakin Skywalker is dead. I destroyed him.

Her breath hitches, and she wails.

“Commander,” Rex tries again, but her head is a vortex of Then you will die and Perhaps this child and not the Jedi way.

Our long awaited meeting.

I destroyed him.

Then you will die.

She can’t breathe she can’t breathe she can only see that yellow eye that’s too familiar but belongs to a stranger can only hear a voice that shouldn’t exist can only mourn and break and--

“Soka?”

“Malachor,” she manages. “I--h-he--I died.”

“What did you say?” someone asks. A vod. It’s the right voice, almost, rough and business-like, not accusing anyone yet, and... and... no. No. Not one of her boys. It’s Fett.

“Um, right at the end? I asked her who taught her to fight like this,” Quinlan says, nervous. “And she said it was soldiers. And I joked, I asked that it wasn’t her Master, and she didn’t answer that. A couple minutes later, she just started...”

“Oh, Soka,” Rex whispers, pulling her closer. “Commander, just breathe with me.”

“H-h-he, he just--R-Rex, he j-just--and I c-c-couldn’t--”

“I know,” her captain whispers. “I know, just breathe with me.”

“He k-k-k-killed me,” she sobs, falling out of the Keldabe and into too-small arms. “I l-loved--he was my broth-ther and--and he just--he killed me, he didn’t even stop.”

“I know,” Rex whispers. “Soka, I know.”

Of course he does.

---------------------------

“It was just bad timing,” Rex says, once they’re in the room she’s been sharing with her little family, curled up under a blanket and watching the floor like it has all the secrets to how she lost her world three times over.

“Is there anything we need to keep in mind?” Fett asks, gruff and uncomfortable. She wonders if he’s angry that she took his necessary confrontation and turned it into this mess.

“Don’t bring up her Jedi Master,” Rex says, and pulls her in when she shivers. Her eyes squeeze shut before she can stop them, tears beading up again. “Just... don’t. It’s too soon.”

“He’s--”

“He Fell,” Ahsoka interrupts. “I thought he died, but he became a Sith. And fifteen years later, we ran into each other, and I refused to join him in the Dark, so he tried to kill me.”

Fett swears, low and muffled. She thinks he has a hand over his mouth.

Quin and Leia aren’t there. She thinks they’re keeping an eye on their Baby Sith prisoner. That’s good.

“Soka,” Rex whispers, and she buries her face in his shoulder. She’s too old to be this kind of mess. She’s thirty-two. She’s Fulcrum. She’s...

She’s in need of a lot of therapy.

“We can avoid the subject unless you bring it up,” Tholme promises. “Definitely until the Temple. Is there anything else we shouldn’t talk about?”

Ahsoka can practically feel Rex’s deadpan look. “Sir, we’re a trio of child soldiers ripped from everything we know. Every other sentence is a risk. We’re just... working our way through.”

There’s a knock at the door. Oh. Quin and Leia.

“Just figured we’d drop this off before we went down to visit Mr. Grumpy-Face,” Quinlan whispers. He still thinks Leia’s a child. He’s trying to make things less terrible for her. That’s nice. “We decided he’ll be less angry if he tries Hoth chocolate, and made some for everyone.”

They definitely made it for Ahsoka herself, and Maul was an afterthought. Still. It’s sweet.

“Commander?” Rex prompts, jostling her a little to try and get her to sit up.

“Gimme a sec,” she manages. It takes longer than it should to push herself away from him, to accept the mug that Leia gives her, too-serious worry in the furrow of her brow and the twist of her soul.

She doesn’t look six. She doesn’t even look twenty-two. This girl was always too old for her skin, forced to grow up in the hostile fear of the Empire.

“Thank you, Princess.”

She sips.

She can barely taste it beyond the ashes she imagines coating her tongue.

I destroyed him, her memory echoes. His slightest hesitation before he made the final move, it haunts her. She almost reached him. If only she’d tried harder, yelled louder, been better...

She shivers.

“Do you need help falling asleep?” Tholme asks. “I’m a regular healer, not a mind healer, but...”

She probably should.

She takes another sip of her drink, willing herself to taste it. It’s good. She likes it. She knows she does.

“Can you make it dreamless?” she whispers.

“It doesn’t always work, but I can try,” he tells her.

She nods. “When I finish the chocolate.”

“Of course.”

---------------------------

Everyone’s careful around her for days. The whole decision to be nicer doesn’t mean anything when she’s walking about in a daze of too few emotions, drained of everything she could feel in favor of a grey cloud of fluff in everything she does.

She does forms. Single saber and Jar’kai. Ataru and Djem so and Soresu. Reverse grip, regular grip, partial reverse on either side.

Again. Again. Again.

She loses herself in the motions, not meditating so much as just empty.

Rex worries. Fett worries. Vos worries.

Leia and Tholme keep their shields locked up tight, and she doesn’t know how they feel. She thinks Leia might be judging her. She think Tholme might be pitying.

Maul simply hates. It’s an old and familiar sensation to walk into, and she takes unthinking comfort in his rage. She’s silent instead of snippy, when she plays the role of guard, and they stare at each other in silence. His eyes burn, and she wonders how much he’s heard of her nightmares.

“You need to talk,” Rex tells her, when he finds her with a cold cup of caff, eyes fixed somewhere beyond it all. She lifts her head. “Soka.”

She just stares at him.

He sighs and pulls her into a hug. “Commander, please.”

She can’t.

Ahsoka stares at the wall behind him, resting her chin on his head. Her neck itches under the lek at the back of her head, a little tingle of a feeling that she can’t bring herself to do anything about. The pale light of the galley is sharp against the chipped paint of the metal that surrounds them. It hurts her eyes to look, but it’s not the deep and dark lit only by red--

Then you will die, her memory growls.

She flinches.

“Breathe,” Rex tells her, too-small hands clinging at her back. “Just breathe, ‘Soka.”

She curls in tighter and tries to just breathe.

---------------------------

“Tell me something good.”

Ahsoka blinks. She looks at Leia. She doesn’t have the energy to parse that.

Leia chances a look at Rex, who isn’t leaving Ahsoka’s side any more than he has to, and Fett on the other side. Tholme’s asleep and Quin’s on Baby Sith duty. It’s just people who know, right now.

The little girl across the table, the child senator, the spy, purses her lips and huffs in irritation. “You knew my biological father before he became one of the worst people in the galaxy. Both of you did. Tell me something good about him.”

Good things.

About Anakin.

“You fought a war as a Jedi,” Leia prompts. “Surely you must have done some good things with him, or at least thought you were.”

Did they?

Every mission ended in tragedy or was just a ploy of Palpatine’s. Every saved life was just...

Wait.

“He built Threepio,” she finally says. “Your father wi--I mean, Bail wiped Threepio’s memory after the Empire rose, for your safety, but Anakin was the one who built him.”

Leia sits up, eyes brighter. “I didn’t know that. I... was Artoo involved? Did he build R2D2, or...”

“No,” Rex says, “But Artoo was his favorite astromech, and they always pushed each other into stupid stunts. We risked a hell of a lot to save that droid, more than once, and I didn’t find out until you started working with the Rebellion full-time, but Artoo and Threepio were the witnesses for your bio-parents’ wedding.”

Leia gapes at him. So does Ahsoka. (Fett doesn’t know enough to care.)

Rex grins, and if it looks a little forced, that’s fine. “He had a holo recording. I was one of the few people left that knew about the marriage that might have wanted to see, so Artoo offered. It was... sweet.”

He waits, probably for Ahsoka to add something herself, but she has nothing.

“I think that’s when they swapped droids, since Threepio was more useful to a politician and Artoo did his best work when we set him loose on the enemy.”

“He never changed,” Leia muses. “Did he always swear that much?”

“Yes,” Ahsoka answers, as Rex laughs. “Always. All the binary I learned started with the best swears.”

She tries to think of another good memory, something else that Leia might appreciate. Her mind ticks back to saving Stinky, which is just a terrible option, because that mission started with Hutts and ended with the Battle of Teth. That massive loss of life, all for the son of the creature that had put Leia in chains.

She wonders if she has anything in her memory that doesn’t end in blood and graves.

“Soka.” Rex.

“Hm?”

“Remember that time Fives and Echo got lost in the undercity their first time on leave, and we had to get the General to help us find them?”

She does.

He’s right, that’s a good story.

“Okay, so what you have to understand,” Ahsoka says, already digging the faint details out and dusting them off, “is that these boys were ARC troopers, top-notch, terrifyingly competent once they got through specialty training, and loyal as hell. Echo had memorized the reg manuals front to back, and Fives was... well, Fives ended up being the only person to figure out the chips before they went into action. Point is, the Domino twins were good... eventually. Just like everyone else, though, they started out shiny.”

---------------------------

“Tholme’s hiding something.”

Ahsoka wonders if Leia will just leave if she ignores her enough. Probably not. This was the girl that got kicked out of boarding school for leading a sit-in at age seven. She’s got patience.

“His job requires him to hide a lot of things,” Ahsoka says instead. “Not as many as Vos will have to, eventually, but a lot.”

“He’s hiding something from us,” Leia insists, visibly frustrated that Ahsoka isn’t as upset about this as she is. “Something important.”

The way she says ‘important’ is clumsy and impacted by the missing baby tooth. She can’t say the r. It comes out as ‘im-poh-ten,’ which is adorable, and if Ahsoka comments on it, she’s probably going to get punched by a six-year-old.

“The Force doesn’t care,” Ahsoka says. “I trust his intentions, if not him as a person.”

“If you don’t trust him, then why trust his intentions?”

“Leia, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I trust one and a half people in the galaxy,” Ahsoka points out. “Me not trusting a person isn’t a sign of anything except my paranoia. The only person I trust fully and without reservation is Rex. Even you, I only mostly trust, because my brain starts screaming if I think too hard. That’s why you’re the half.”

“Okay, whatever, paranoia aside,” Leia barrels on, “He should tell us. Whatever it is that he’s hiding, we deserve to know. We’re not children that he can just hide things from for our own good.”

Ahsoka presses her lips together. “Leia. Princess. I know you’re used to holding all the cards--”

“This isn’t about me being a control freak!”

“It is, though,” Ahsoka soothes, and smiles. “Your mother--the bio one--was the same way. You spent years as one of the leaders of the Rebellion, so obviously you’re used to having all the information, and people reporting to you... but Tholme is a Jedi Master. He reports to the Council and the Republic. Do you know how many people I kept secrets from while I was a padawan? We’re an unknown, Leia. They have no proof that we’re on their side, especially since we’re traveling with Fett.”

Leia crosses her arms and glares as hard as she can.

“I’m not going to bother him,” Ahsoka says. “I’ve already had, like, five unrelated mental breakdowns. I’m putting this on hold until we get to the Temple and I can trust that there’s a healer on hand to sedate me or something.”

“You... want to be sedated?”

“Leia, this... really should be obvious, but a Force-Sensitive losing their osik the way I have been isn’t actually safe. I know I broke a weapons rack last week.” Ahsoka gestures vaguely. “If the Jedi Master isn’t telling me something for reasons that might relate to my clear and obvious mental instability, I’m going to assume he’s got a point.”

“So he should tell me or Rex.”

“We’ll be on Coruscant in four days,” Ahsoka soothes. “Just... let it be. They won’t hurt us.”

“You don’t know that.”

Ahsoka shrugs. “I don’t have to. The Force leads me in all things, including this.”

Leia isn’t impressed by that, but Leia isn’t impressed by much in the first place.

She strides off in a fit that is, perhaps, more influenced by her six-year-old emotional control than she’d like to admit. Ahsoka lets her. It’s not worth the argument.

It’s only a few minutes later that Fett strides in, takes the seat Leia was just in, and asks, “What would it take for you to teach me how to use a jetii’kad?”

She blinks at him. “You want to learn how to use a lightsaber?”

“Yes.”

“...why?”

“Viszla.”

“I see.”

She does.

Ahsoka taps her fingers against the table, eyeing him with the kind of interest she copied from Master Kenobi, years ago. Fett doesn’t fidget, but she thinks he might want to. He just looks back, waiting for her judgement.

“You’ll need to justify it,” she finally says. “It’s a significant difference from what you actually did, so I need to know your reasoning for doing it, and your plans for once it’s done.”

“That’s all?”

“That’s step one,” she corrects. She tilts her head, considering. “My standards for you aren’t built in a vacuum, and you know that. Explain to me what you plan to do and how you plan to do it, and if I approve...”

“You’ll help me achieve it.”

“Maybe,” she allows. “A lot of that depends on Rex.”

“I expected as much,” Fett says. “He is... an admittedly large part of the reason.”

“He would be,” she says. She gives the silence a few more seconds to sit awkwardly between them, and then stands up. “I’d guess you’ve been brainstorming already. Do you have it written down or is it mostly just in your head so far?”

“I’m still... debating options, so to speak.”

She grins, and the shape of the predator’s smile, the baring of teeth... that almost makes him step back. She can see it in the twitch of his muscles. Smart man.

“Follow me,” she says, and doesn’t wait for him to stand. She strides out with tooka-light steps, hears the heavy beskar tread behind her, and goes to the cargo hold. Fett’s confusion grows tangibly behind her, especially when she tosses him a wooden quarterstaff. She picks up the other and spins it in one hand.

“You’re going to fight me,” she tells him, stretching and letting the staff help with the process. “And while we fight, you’re going to tell me what your plans for Mandalore are.”

He mimics her, but there’s a frown on his face. “And why staffs?”

“You and I, we’ve only sparred bare-handed,” she says. “I need a feel for how you fight with a weapon anyway. These are a good start.”

“Not the beskad?”

She grins, and the twitch is back. “No. That can wait. We start with the staffs.”

He takes a stance, and she mirrors him. She lets him strike first with a weapon, but she’s the one that asks all the questions.

(He is the only one on the ship that can fight her one-on-one right now, and he can win. Still, she makes him work for every inch, and what she doesn’t win in bruises, she wins in words.)

(Fett might yet be a proper Mand’alor, but Ahsoka learned war from her brothers, negotiation at the knee of a general and in the shadow of a prince, and government at the side of duchesses and queens.)

(If he wants her help uniting his people, he needs to prove that he can hold them together once she’s gone.)

---------------------------

Ahsoka’s interrogation of Jango’s plans is thorough, and she’s not the only one involved. She brings Leia in, and has her join in on the grilling. She maybe laughs as the twenty-seven-year-old survivor of Galidraan, the Mand’alor, a man who has killed Master Jedi with his bare hands, gets lectured on various government structures by a tiny girl that's missing several teeth and needs to sit on books to see the table properly.

Still, Leia knows this better than any of the rest of them do. The girl might have grown up heir to a monarchy, but she got a classical education and was drilled on democracy and all associated forms of government. Where Ahsoka knows military protocol and law enforcement, intersystem relations and defensive measures, Leia knows agricultural subsidies and welfare programs, infrastructure and education.

Ahsoka may know how to find out if someone’s breaking a zoning law, but Leia knows why it exists in the first place.

“And I grew up in a cult,” Rex says, when an argument on that topic breaks out. Everyone that hasn’t heard the joke-that-isn’t-a-joke stares at him. “The Jedi grew up in a religious meritocracy; Leia grew up in a monarchy; and I grew up in a cult.”

Ahsoka elbows him. He’s not wrong, but still.

Unfortunately, Ahsoka is about forty-seven percent sure that Leia will put her foot in her mouth when it comes to Mandalorian culture, blunt as the girl is. That prefrontal cortex isn’t anywhere near as developed as it should be, either, so impulse control for the princess isn’t great. Ahsoka refuses to let Leia and Fett talk about ways to mend the breaks between tradition and the pacifism of the New Mandalorians without either Rex or Ahsoka herself as a mediating presence. Tholme sits in a few times, but while he knows that Leia isn’t really six--though not about the time-travel, yet--Quinlan doesn’t.

They admittedly end up doing this while he’s on Maul-sitting duty.

“It’s like he doesn’t even care about making nice with the people that, at this point, make up the majority of his people!” Leia grumbles one night, as Ahsoka kicks over a step stool so the girl can brush her teeth. “He may not like the New Mandalorians, but from what I understand, it’s still early enough to prevent the majority of the cultural bleaching you brought up. If he stays this stubborn--”

“Leia,” Ahsoka says, and the girl’s mouth snaps shut. “I’m aware of your reasons for not trusting his intentions. But if I may say? Chill.”

“He’s not even trying!”

“He’s trying a hell of a lot harder than he did in the original timeline,” Ahsoka reminds her. “Brush your teeth.”

“I’m not a--”

“Teeth.”

It’s a little worrying, how the child’s brain affects Leia, but... well. That’ll pass in time, hopefully. Until then, Ahsoka gets to be the aunt she should have been. This includes tucking Leia in, which the girl grumbles about despite the fond waves of comfort that enter the Force around her. Ahsoka doesn’t call her out on it, just brushes back wisps of hair to plant a kiss on Leia’s forehead, and then does the same once Rex stumbles in, grumbling about the limitations of a cadet’s body, but far more ready to follow the protocol that is bedtime.

Rex doesn’t pretend to not like getting tucked in, for all that he’s sharing with a grumbly, already-asleep princess. He smiles up at Ahsoka, lets her hug him, and pretends they can be a normal family for five seconds.

Quinlan’s making a late night snack for himself in the galley. Tholme is guarding the Baby Sith. Fett...

Ahsoka goes to the cockpit, takes the copilot’s seat, and watches hyperspace pass them by.

It takes long minutes before either of them say anything.

“Do Jedi believe in souls?”

His shields are up, locked up tighter than the innermost chambers of the Imperial Palace. She has no idea where he’s taking this question. She has to cast about for an answer.

“That depends on how you define a soul,” she finally says. “Leia told me about Force Ghosts. A Jedi Master who underwent the right meditations and training could pass into the Force upon their death without losing their sense of self. They could remain themselves, to an extent, and interact with force-sensitive individuals. I don’t know if they could last that way indefinitely, but depending on your definition, I could argue those ghosts were evidence of a form of soul.”

“So you believe that the dead pass into the Force, but that what passes could be a soul. Something must exist for a sense of self to disappear at death in a way that impacts the Force as you understand it, and many would use the word ‘soul’ for that something.”

“Mm,” Ahsoka considers it. “I’d say that’s pretty accurate. You’ve put a lot of thought into this.”

“What about those not yet born?”

Her fingers feel cold, and she finds herself no longer able to watch the passage of hyperspace as passively as she had, and her eyes catch on streaks and motes of what is not dust, her vision unable to keep any more still than her heart.

“Oh,” she hears herself say. “The clones.”

It’s a long time before he answers, but the walls come down. He carries a confused sort of grief with him, guilty and a mite resentful. His questions have been building for longer than she’d thought. His voice is rough. “I’ve taken plenty of lives, but I’ve never known the name of someone I erased from existence before they were even born.”

“The stories we told Leia about the brothers.”

There’s a grunt of agreement from Fett, so those dots at least connect.

“I take it my answer wasn’t helpful,” she manages to say.

“Will they still exist?” Fett asks. “Will they be born elsewhere? Or is... is a soul something that only comes into existence after the body does?”

“I have no idea,” Ahsoka admits. “I want... I want to think that I’d be able to find them eventually, to recognize them, if their souls are still born into this world elsewhere.”

“And if your Sith finds someone else to build his army out of?”

Ahsoka looks at him, sharp and pointed. “You wouldn’t.”

“They’ll be doing it anyway, if their plans are as ironclad as you say.”

“You’re already associating with Jedi,” Ahsoka says, fighting the urge to break his nose. “They wouldn’t approach you, not now. They can’t leverage your anger against you. They won’t know everything, but they’ll know that you have friends among the Jedi.”

“You think they can’t come up with better lies?”

He has a point. He has more than one point and she hate hate hates it.

A Jedi does not hate.

I am no Jedi.

“You’re going to have to convince me,” she says. “Especially if you want to somehow balance this with the darksaber thing. I won’t teach you how to fight with it if you’re not planning to retake Mandalore.”

“That’s how they’d sell it,” he says. “Retaking Mandalore. An army ostensibly for the Jedi, and ultimately...”

“You’d build an army of slaves.”

“No, I’d be the inside man for when they build that army anyway.”

She holds his gaze. She looks away first.

“Torrent?”

“I’m thinking.”

He lets her.

“I’ll need to talk to Rex. Probably Leia.”

“Understandable.”

“I don’t like this.”

“I’m only just considering it. It’s an idea, not a plan.”

“That’s the only reason I haven’t ripped your throat out with my teeth.”

“Hyperbole doesn’t suit you.”

She glares at him, and leaves, her mind chopping up and laying out every possible angle on Fett volunteering to do the exact same thing as last time, but somehow worse.

Great. Just what she needed.

---------------------------

Ahsoka isn’t there for the shouting match between Rex and Fett, but she doesn’t have to be. She can hear it form clear across the ship, and Rex comes to her afterwars. He’s been crying, which isn’t as surprising as it could be. These bodies are still prone to such things, and will be for years. She doesn’t comment.

“Do you want to talk about it?” she asks.

“We need to take out Sidious before he starts anything on Kamino.”

“Agreed,” she says. “It’ll be hard, though.”

“I don’t care.”

“What did Fett say?”

“That if it wasn’t going to be my brothers, it would be someone else’s. Either we stopped the cloning from happening at all, or we mitigated damage by being there.”

“I don’t think Sidious is going to tap him for it,” Ahsoka admits. “Not unless you’re willing to stage that kind of fight publicly enough for Fett to claim the Jedi poisoned you, family, against him. It could work, but it’s a gamble.”

He knows all of this.

“I miss them,” he says, and she cards her fingers though the curls he’s managed to grow in the past weeks. “I just... even at the end, I had Wolffe. I knew Boba was out there; I wouldn’t be surprised if the beskar let him survive a Sarlacc. I had brothers. Not as many as I used to, but there was always someone. I miss them all, so much it hurts.”

“It wouldn’t be them,” she reminds him. She pulls him closer, puts her cheek to his head. “It would be the same process, the same faces, the same training, even, but the boys themselves...”

He clings to her and shudders.

“Rex?”

“I can’t force them to grow up the way I did. I want them back. Sidious is going to make the army no matter what. Someone’s going to suffer, and I don’t want it to be my brothers, but they won’t exist otherwise, and...”

“And it’s an impossible choice,” she summarizes. “And it sucks.”

“It’s sucks Gungan balls, ‘Soka.”

She laughs, and feels him smile against her shoulder. Good. He needs to smile more.

“He’s still trying to get me to like him,” Rex says. "He’s still making an effort, and he never did that for anyone except Boba, and it’s weird. I don’t know what to do with any of that.”

“Gain a brother,” Ahsoka whispers, and she feels him jerk against her. “If that’s what you want.”

“He’s not vod.”

“Same blood as all the rest, and you’re older than him, so he’s not really in a position to be a parent to you like he was to Boba,” she says carefully. “You don’t have to do anything, if you don’t want to, but... I think he’s trying. I think this means a lot to him, and that he isn’t any more sure of what to do than you are. You don’t have to forgive him for what he did in the future, you don’t have to accept when he reaches out, you don’t have to ever talk to him again after we reach Coruscant if you don’t want, but I think... I think it’s worth at least considering what you have to gain. I think it’s worth looking at what he’s trying to give you.”

Rex huffs. “Why couldn’t he just be the shabuir I knew in training?”

“Something happened between now and then?” she offers. “I don’t know. I never met him in the original timeline. I just know the guy that keeps trying to get on my good side so you’ll like him.”

He outright scoffs. “Soka, that’s not the only reason he’s trying to get on your good side.”

“...I’m a former Jedi who talks trash to his face,” she says slowly. “And I cried on him. There is no reason for him to be nice to me, other than you.”

“He thinks you’re cool and a good person and wants you to be his friend.”

“Bantha poodoo.”

Rex grins in a way that goes straight to smirking. “Soka, I’m not joking. Jango Fett wants you to be his friend.”

“Kriffing why?” she asks, more than a little horrified. “I’m a mess, look like I’m ten years younger than him, have gleefully kicked his ass in front of an audience; I even told Vos to throw him at a baby Sith Lord. Putting up with me is one thing, but I’m... I’m only barely not a Jedi. I’m a historical enemy of Mandalore, and part of the community he hates more than anything, and--”

“And his reaction to you kicking his ass was pure Mando,” Rex says. “In that he now thinks you’re a badass, and thus worth being friends with.”

“I can’t believe that. I physically cannot.”

“Soka, just accept it. The Mand’alor wants to be friends with you.” He scratches at his scalp. “I mean, he met you while you were protecting what appeared to be children, and it’s apparently still early enough for him to care about that.”

She leans back in her seat, eyes on the wall ahead of her and back against the cool metal of the other side. Rex falls back with her. She wonders if Rex changed the subject so they didn’t have to talk about deciding how many of his brothers get to exist, and whether or not he can swallow the bitterness of his history to have a connection with at least one member of his blood. She doesn’t ask. If he wants to change the subject, that’s his right.

“I don’t... no.” She denies it as well as she can, and then the implications dig a little deeper. “Is this me accidentally signing up to be the Jedi Order’s official liaison to the Mand’alor?”

“I mean, this point in time... they’ve got Kenobi for the Duchess, yeah?” Rex shrugs. “Good relations with the system are probably a good thing, and you’ve got a stronger connection than Tholme and Vos.”

“Ugh,” she says. She rubs a hand against her head, and then lurches to her feet. “Fine! Fine. If it’ll get him to retake Mandalore before the Sith decide to bribe him with an army he doesn’t get to keep, I’ll teach him how to fight for the kriffin’ Darksaber.”

“That’s what makes the decision for you?”

“Well something had to!”

They only get one lesson in before Coruscant, but the lesson lasts a full day, and Ahsoka’s got his comm number. Fett’s a quick learner anyway, and Tholme was there to give pointers where Ahsoka couldn’t.

He won’t measure up to a Jedi in saber-to-saber combat, but he doesn’t need to. He just needs to learn enough to turn all those skills with a beskad to something that works with a jetii’kad.

(The balance of a saber is wrong to those used to a physical weapon. The inertia doesn’t work the way anyone expects. There’s no need to worry about damaging the blade.)

(Fett is good. Ahsoka is better. And, bless his heart, he knows it.)

(She will mold him into the shape of someone who not only can, but should rule a system with a history like that, and he damn well knows that too.)

---------------------------

“Dropping out of hyperspace in T-minus twenty seconds.”

The Slave I is not, in fact, a Venator-class starship, or anything else near the size and smoothness of the ships that Ahsoka grew up on. This is a bounty hunter’s vessel, and the drop to real space jolts like nothing else. Ahsoka’s in the copilot seat for the return, but Tholme’s going to swap with her as soon as they’ve got confirmation that there were no problems with exiting hyperspace, and nobody’s shooting at them.

“We’re not going to get shot at,” Tholme had assured her.

“I always get shot at,” she’d told him.

“I have our clearance,” he reminded her, seeming more amused than frustrated. “There’s no need to worry about getting shot at.”

“I also always get shot at,” Jango had thrown in.

“Okay,” Tholme had allowed, after several minutes of his trust in the Temple warring against Ahsoka and Jango’s learned paranoia. The looks Quinlan had darted around the room when Leia and Rex also claimed ‘chronic getting-shot-at disease’ had been a treat. The paranoia of a Watchman and a future Shadow was great, but the paranoia of three revolutionaries and a galaxy-wide criminal was greater. “You can take us in close enough to get in radio contact, but the second we have to ask for clearance and a vector, I’m in the seat.”

She’d agreed, of course. She was paranoid, not inexperienced.

“We’re much less likely to get shot down by ground control if you tell them we’re with you,” she’d said, to his hilariously apparent metaphysical exhaustion. “Obviously.”

“Good enough,” he’d sighed.

What that means is mostly just that Ahsoka gets to watch the distant star at the center of Coruscant’s system grow rapidly brighter. She can pick out the constellations she’d grown up with, the stars the creche had projected on the ceiling every night, the ones that she may not have seen from the surface, but had greeted her and then sent her on her way every time she left on yet another campaign that lost her men their lives for a Sith Lord's wretched plans. These were the shapes and stories she’d never seen again as Fulcrum, a woman so hunted that to come within a dozen subsectors of the planet was to court her death.

For sixteen years, she hadn’t ventured closer than Alderaan, save for a single trip to Chandrila.

And now, maybe twenty minutes away at this speed, was the Temple. It was home.

A home that didn’t know her, that had sentenced her to death, that had hosted the rampage of her former master... but home nonetheless.

“Stable?” Fett grunts.

“Thrusters are good,” she confirms.

“I meant you.”

Ah. “I’m... fine. As good as I could be, anyway.”

She hesitates, but manages to speak before he does. “You?”

“I’m not the one walking into an entire building of triggers.”

“Only because you’re not entering it,” she says. “It’s the home of your ancestral enemies who, bad info or no, killed off a whole lot of your friends.”

“I get to leave,” he says. “You don’t.”

She plans to needle him a bit more, maybe on something a little less based in both their traumas. She needs to talk, if only to fill up the silence and keep herself from reaching out to all the lights in the Force. It’ll be too much, she knows.

Tholme enters the cockpit. “Change of plans.”

“Better be a good reason,” Jango says, voice flat.

“Leia’s crying.”

Ahsoka’s unbuckling herself before she can process the words fully. “What?”

Leia doesn’t cry for no reason. Her emotional control is as difficult as the body makes it, but she doesn’t just cry. There’s always a cause.

“I don’t know. Rex said to get you,” Tholme explains. “She was saying a name. He seemed to recognize it.”

Not good not good not good. If Leia was feeling the Emper--No. She cuts the thought off there. No catastrophizing. Information first.

“What name.”

“Luke. Mean anything to--and she’s gone.”

Ahsoka ignores him, just sprints to where she knows the ‘young ones’ are. They’re all in Maul’s room, because nobody wants to be alone with him now, but it’s the worst time to leave him without supervision. It’s not the worst option; he mostly refuses to talk, still.

This holds true, because he definitely isn’t talking when she bursts in. He’s sitting on the bench, in a corner, hugging his knees and watching Quinlan try to calm Leia down.

“Captain, sitrep.”

“Vos and Tholme attempted to show Leia how to reach out to feel the Temple from a distance. They felt that it would be a good use of the time, and an interesting exercise at this distance. She attempted to do so, struggled for several minutes, and then reacted with shock. She has repeated the name ‘Luke’ several times since then, and we’ve been unable to fully calm her down. I asked Tholme to get you, as you are the only Force-Sensitive on board that understands the situation in full.”

“Understood.” She nods to him, and then goes to nudge at Quinlan. “Vos, move.”

“Torre--”

“You can sit behind her, hold her in your lap like you did when we had lunch the other day, but I need to get in her face.” She waits for him to comply, and then drops to her knees and takes Leia’s hands in her own. She radiates calm and assurance, even though she knows Quinlan’s probably been doing the same since this started. She dips her head enough to get in the girl’s line of sight, waits for her to meet eyes.

“Princess,” she says, and meets Leia’s eyes. “What did you feel?”

“Luke.”

From this distance... they’ve got half the system to go, at least, and Leia’s training shouldn’t reach that far for anything more than the fact that the Temple is there. Ahsoka could feel unshielded individuals from here, if she focused, but she’s also been doing this much, much longer. The twins theory holds more water than ever.

“Can you show me?” Ahsoka asks, instead of asking for more clarification. She squeezes Leia’s hands and smiles. “In the Force?”

Leia nods, and closes her eyes. It’s not the first time they’ve done this, but it’s the first time in a while that Leia’s needed Ahsoka to guide her through.

Luke’s light, for all that it’s unfamiliar to Ahsoka, is brilliant among the rest of the signatures in Coruscant. Like Anakin and Leia, he’s a star in his own right, but he’s brighter. He doesn’t have Anakin’s bitterness or Leia’s righteous anger, just... light. Ahsoka had asked Leia to show her instead of looking for herself because she’d expected to not recognize the boy, but she needn’t have. He’s unmistakable.

He’s so bright that she almost misses the other signature that she does recognize. She shies away, knowing that it would be there, but... but it’s almost twinned with another nearby. Not identical, but different in a way that comes with age, with trauma, with... death.

Leia hadn’t arrived alone, after all.

Why would Luke?

Her eyes snap open, her hand coming up not-quite-fast enough to clap over her mouth as she gasps. She feels a shudder, one that starts in her shoulders and reaches deep into her ribcage, finds a home in her chest and doesn’t stop.

“Oh fuck,” Quinlan whispers. “Torrent? Um, Sokari?”

Rex steps closer. “Commander?”

“That shabuir faked his death again,” she manages. “Three times, Rex!”

He blinks at her. “...I know way too many people who fit that description, Soka.”

“Master Ke--” she cuts herself off. He might have changed his name, just like she had. There’s already an Obi-Wan here. Rex seems to be figuring it out, but she needs to give him another hint.

“He pulled a Hardeen,” she stresses, and Rex’s eyes snap shut with a tired groan.

“Who?” Leia asks, her own tumult of emotion paused in the wake of Ahsoka’s shock. There’s a hope and relief to her, and Ahsoka belatedly realizes that her main worry had been that she’d misidentified what was going on, that she’d given herself a false hope. Ahsoka’s internal reaction, her approval and awe at Luke’s presence, had trickled over enough to give Leia the reassurance she’d needed.

Unintentional as it was, Ahsoka was glad that she’d succeeded in helping her charge.

“Er...” she trails off. “I don’t know what name he’s going by, right now. We’ve spent so long in hiding...”

“The man Luke knew as Crazy Old Ben,” Rex says, and Leia’s eyes light up.

“Oh,” she breathes. “General O--no, names. The High General, then.”

“Yeah,” Ahsoka says, not a little soft. “Yeah, I guess death didn’t stop him any more than it stopped me.”

“I could have told you that,” Leia says, smiling far too widely. She squirms where she still sits on Quinlan’s lap. “He was... he taught you, right?”

“As much my master as the official one,” Ahsoka says. She glances as Quinlan, feels Maul’s gaze on the back of her head. “Your f... my official master was very young when I was assigned to him. He wasn’t ready to teach, wasn’t even ready to be a knight, entirely, so my training was split between him and his master.”

Quinlan pops in at that moment, “Your grandmaster was military, too?”

We all were, she thinks. Even you, in your own way.

“I landed in their care mid-battle,” she says carefully. “It was a complicated situation.”

He nods, and she vaguely notes that he’s got his arms wrapped around Leia, and his chin tucked on top of her head. She isn’t sure if Leia’s noticed, but Quinlan’s picked up ‘baby’-sitting duty so often recently that she’s fairly certain he’s all but declared her ‘little-sister shaped.’ It doesn’t matter that Leia’s older--she’s still taking the juice boxes and gummy snacks that Quinlan shoves at her every single snacktime.

“Do you think...” Rex trails off, something uncomfortable twisting in the Force, even though his face keeps it mostly hidden. “My brothers. If the General survived and... and made it back...”

“I didn’t feel any,” Ahsoka says, because she knows she’d have noticed if it was anyone she’d met, and likely any clone at all. They all felt different in the Force, but they all held a spark that made her know it was one of them. “I’m sorry, Rex’ika.”

“A long shot,” he says, that dash of hope shriveling up. He must see something in her face, because there’s a curl of warmth in him, even if his smile is brittle. “It’s fine, really. I have you, ‘Soka.”

Rex and Ahsoka. Two halves of one whole.

She can’t wait to hear the lectures on attachment, the way people who haven’t seen her wars try to criticize her for clinging to any chance at still having a will to live. She can’t wait to see them justify telling her that it’s selfish to hold her sanity in her hands and refuse to let the grief take it away. She can’t wait to stare someone down for asking her to ‘learn to let go’ after she’s lost her family, her life, her universe three times over.

Most of the Jedi are more sensible than that, are reasonable enough to see those shades of grey and how to approach rules in the spirit they are meant instead of the rigid letter, but there will be some.

There will be more than enough telling her she is wrong to hold her oldest, closest, best friend as dear as she can.

Attachment, they’ll say.

What they’ll mean is ‘codepedence.’

They won’t be entirely wrong.

She reaches out for him, lets him fall into her side and stay there, closes her eyes and reaches out for the man she’d long called father, when they’d still been in each other’s lives.

This time, past the deafening flare of surprise-love-hope of the little star next to him, she can feel him reach back.

---------------------------

The second the ship has landed, even before Tholme and Fett are done with the checks, Ahsoka’s waiting at the exit. She strains her hearing so she’ll know the second the system will let her open the massive door of the cargo hold.

Leia clings to her side, and the boys stand to her back.

Quinlan’s stressed enough that she can feel it like a cloud. She is very much not trying to feel that stress. Quinlan’s stress levels, back where he’s got Maul so he can keep an eye on Ahsoka and the Baby Sith at the same time, are so low on her priorities list that it’s a a little sad.

It doesn’t take long for her to be able to punch the button and open the damn door.

It opens slowly. She bounces on her toes, because there’s a beacon of light and a steady, familiar glow on the other side, and she’s so, so close. She can’t see through the crack yet, because it’s day in this part of Coruscant, and the sunlight is blinding against the dark of the hold. So close. She’s so close.

“The hell’s wrong with you?”

Fett? Fett. He’s already here to get off? This door’s slow.

She doesn’t answer him, because the door is finally open enough to let her out, and she leaps through the gap.

She lands on a pourstone floor, feels pebbles and grit compress under her boots, frantically looks around as her eyes adjust to light and--

The High General, the Negotiator, Master Obi-Wan Kenobi, looking just as he did when she first met him, if a little less armored and a little more fed. The hair, the beard, the crinkle in the corner of his eyes. His spirit is a little older, his smile a little more strained, his posture a little more tired, but it’s him.

He spreads his arms, low enough that she could have dismissed it if she’d cared less for hugs, except she’s almost as small as she was when they met.

And every other hug she’d given back then had been, functionally, her being a living missile aiming her montrals for someone’s organs.

She’s a little more aware of how to avoid stabbing her friends in the intestine now.

“Master!”

She sprints for him, collides and sobs, feels him stumble back and then sink to his knees on the too-hard floor, and can feel the tears pouring out of her already. Her breath hitches, and she wails like a child, and that last part of her that couldn’t even grasp at safety shreds itself. His arms are tight around her, warm and strong and Master Kenobi don’t you dare leave again.

It doesn’t matter that Sidious is out there, that the Republic’s been building towards war for a century, that even now someone’s kicking up the Trade Federation. Her dad is here.

“I’ve missed you too, my dear,” he says, pressing a kiss to the side of her head, the bristles of his beard scratching along the skin of her forehead. Off to the side, the binary suns that are Luke and Leia grow brighter in proximity, so bright she can barely bear it.

(“Fett, why the kriff are you reaching for your blaster?!”)

(“Torrent said her master tried to kill her.”)

(“Different guy, that was a different guy, put the blaster away.”)

(“You could have just warned me.”)

(“I didn’t expect you to go for a shot on sight!”)

(”Calm down, Jetiika, if I was going to shoot on sight, we’d already be in a firefight.”)

She ignores everything.

“If you fake your death one more time, I swear I’m going to kill you myself.”

He tries to pull away to talk to her more directly. She does not let him. He apparently resigns himself to this, because he just adjusts how he’s sitting and pulls her in closer.

“In my defense, I was far from the only one presumed dead that took advantage of that status, by the end,” he says, letting her slump into his lap and cry herself dry. “I’m proud of you. You know that, I hope.”

She nods against his chest, smearing tears and snot across the linen and wool. She doesn’t care that they’ll need a thorough washing. She can have her public breakdown and it’s fine because Master Kenobi is here.

He doesn’t even know what she’s spent the past fifteen years doing. Luke wouldn’t have known. He doesn’t know she’s thirty-two and broken, beyond a shadow and cut down by her own master. There’s so much he doesn’t know but the Force rings with the truth of it: he’s proud of her anyway.

“I’m going by Ben, now,” he mutters against her montral. “There’s already an Obi-Wan here, after all. Still, I remain a Kenobi.”

She can’t make the words come out of her mouth. She’s overwhelmed, so much so that speech is a mite bit beyond her.

Sokari Torrent, she presses along the frayed bond that’s knitting itself back to life with every breath they take. Leia was already calling me Auntie Soka, and Rex and I both took Torrent, for...

“For the men you lost,” he mutters. “Yes, that’s fitting.”

He smells like sapir tea and a spiced beard oil.

There’s a whirl of activity about her, greetings and ‘a Sith apprentice?’ and introductions. She distantly notes when Fett almost shoots Dooku before Rex shuts that down and advises the Master to leave the area before things spiral out of control. She feels Ben stand, and she stands with him, clings to his side like a child and trusts that whatever happens, whatever needs to happen, he’ll take care of it until she can stand on her own two feet without swaying.

Rex grabs her free hand, and she feels herself settle back into her skin, bit by bit.

She’s back at the Temple. The twins are safe. Her grandmaster is here. She has her other half.

They can save the galaxy this time.

She’s alive she’s home she’s okay.

She’s okay.

Everything’s going to be okay.