#sin with me caleb

[megatraven]

happy birthday to CALEB NORTH one of the best grumpy guys ever

[harbingerofdespair]

Do y'all think cal or Yvette would have gotten their routes if we saw how vinca really was. She was different in onyx's route and we didn't really see much of her but I can tell a lot more people started to like her after reading Yvette's route. I think she would have won the votes instead of cal

[spottedenchants]

12 and 97? ;P

Fun fun :D

12: Noises by Mike Mains & The Branches

This one technically covers the whole section of TS's 2.5 year angst when Essek is moping on the Nein Heroez II- angery boy ahoy

“Why are you here?”

“Why do you think, Essek?”

“You care, yes. I am certain that is the case for every. Last. One of you.”

At arm’s length, he notes the scream stuck in his gullet, swelling his tongue as it makes every attempt to scrabble from his lungs and carve flesh.

He bites it back, as always. As always, he meters it a miser.

He hisses out a sigh sharp enough to sand his voice perfectly level. 

“But, I don’t need your pity. I do not need your concern. I am merely biding my time, and am attempting to be unobtrusive in the meanwhile. Patience is a virtue, no?”

“No need to go overboard with it. You didn’t pick it as a name over Journey.”

A shrill whine in his mind, that collared thing in his chest begging to roar, Essek scours his synapses for every remaining marrow-ground speck of diplomacy.

It is a slog. It is a strain.

It is a neglected habit he summons by rote, but he has learned from his snap at Jester that if he wants to be understood by the Common-minded he must phrase himself simple and stupid.

-

97: Brave New World by Kalandra

Campaign Essek song! I have this one as an Aeor montage, so here's some Aeor Wizard Date :3

All pieces placed, it sounds very much as though there was a body grown from seed flesh, then, capable of housing an unbound soul. No wonder this subject was broached with the Empire’s leanings pertaining to necromancy.

“Human shapes tend to come with ten as I understand it.”

“That one’s gone, now.”

So there was more than one. Misdirection indeed.

“And the other? Or would it be ‘others’?”

“He also has a furrow, healed very well, right…”

And Caleb lifts a foot to the seat, bends one knee up, runs a pinkie along his inner thigh.

“Here. Certainly nothing he would have revealed in polite company.”

Essek snaps his eyes to Caleb’s face, finds him smirking as he continues.

“We found that too.”

If Astrid’s scream represented a mere sliver of the rage held internal by those of Caleb’s learning….

“Some deserved catharsis in the process, I’m sure.”

“Oh yes.”

For an instant, there’s an unmistakable tinderbox spark to Caleb’s eyes, a slight manic delight, a ghost of an impression like the glint of blade before blood, fang before gore, that reminds Essek to be grateful he is this man’s friend and not foe.

Just as quick, it is gone.

-

send me a number 1-100 and the share the song on my top songs list and a snippet from its fic

[ewa-jednak-chce-spac]

Congratulations to Idatatsu fans

Idate and Tatsumiya won with Cal and SWM!mc in my one true ultimate shipping tournament and advanced to round three!

Cal and mc fans, don’t weep, because your ship remains awesome! 

[sunwarmed-ash]

Happy New Year!

Something I started back in 2022 and will continue through 2024 is 🔥Sinful Sunday🔥

What is it?

Every Sunday at 9 PM MST I will post a new chapter from one of my WIPS on AO3. They range in fandoms because I am in quite a few, but the currents in rotation include Stranger Things, Marvel MCU, All Spider-Man/Venom variations, Detroit Become Human, Twilight, HP, and The Breakfast Club. You can almost always assume queer/poly dynamics :D

Where will they be posted?

Here on my blog, my AO3, and my ko-fi

How can I follow for updates?

Following my blog and bookmarking the stories you like on AO3 allows you to get notifications when I post a new chapter! I also use the tag #sinful sunday on Tumblr with all my fic posts!

Is Ko-fi/Patreon support necessary for reading these fics?

No, but writing and building my small business are my full-time jobs! Tips, and coffee are kind ways to support my growing passions and assist your neighborhood starving artist <3

*I will be starting a patreon exclusive ART membership soon but reading fics will always be 100% free!

How can I support 100% for free?

Kudos, comments, and interaction! Hearing from y'all is truly what inspires me to write more! The fandom community was the reason I started writing fanfiction and I'm here to stay <3 It's so cool to be a part of something so loved and cherished by people all over the world.

Now that tumblr has polls, voting for your fav fics also helps me see what people are interested in!! It may even help get the fic you're waiting for posted ahead of schedule!

That's it! Thanks for reading!

Love always, Ash/Max

[glupblorbo]

this is how it happened right

[asherisawkward]

Owl House Hunger Games (Again)

[cushfuddled]

Okay…which articles of clothing have you bought because they reminded you of a favorite blorbo

[fatedmuses]

//tag drop 9 (ship tag edition part 2)

[jcrcmy]

' ¿quién te limitó de esa manera más cruel? a un gato no los tienes que sacar a pasear, ocupan menos espacio, se bañan solos... ' empezó a enumerar como si alguna vez haya tenido algún minino. ¡sí, claro! nunca había tenido tanta suerte. ' sinceramente, no sé si soy de los que se embarcan en misiones que nacen fallidas. lo que te puedo ofrecer son más ideas, ' chasquea los dedos en medio de su iluminación mental. ' un hamster. lo puedes meter a escondidas en el departamento y es tan pequeño que nadie se dará cuenta. ¿qué tal? puede tener los mismos colores de alguno de ellos, ' con la barbilla, señalaba las fotografías de los canes. ¿creía en lo que decía? no. importaba más que el otro le creyera.

‘ corrección: serán míos ’ vaya que es experto en inmiscuir al resto del mundo en sus propias problemáticas, pero ese debate ha estado rondando su cabeza desde hace horas. ‘ no puedo juzgarte, estamos en el mismo punto ’ la palma se posa en el pecho, le es demasiado difícil elegir. puf, ojalá le dieran libertad de tener todos los animales del mundo. ‘ uf, me encantan los gatos — lastimosamente me limitaron a canes ’ chasquea lengua en lo que vuelve a guardar el teléfono en su bolsillo. ‘ mejor ayúdame a pensar, ¿cómo puedo convencer a les profesores de que me dejen tener una mascota en el dormitorio? soy un estudiante brillante, sin mí esta generación no tendría estrellas ’ está exagerando por mera comedia, aún si sí busca argumentos. ‘ merezco una retribución, ¿no? ’

[captainmera]

Your recent art post (wonderful art btw!) raised a question for me: how are Caleb's mental health issues different in the modern day? Does he still have broadly the same hangups, or do they have significant differences? (That AU summary was a joy to read!) Love your writings, both prose and analysis!

Broadly the same hang-ups, yes. :3

But some additions or contextual changes!

cw: mental health, suicidal ideation, self-destruction.

Though in the modern AU, he's a bit more tormented over being in the closet as a bisexual guy, since it's a lot more focus on that sort of "sin" in our modern time.

Back in the 1660s, it was a straight-up crime you'd get hanged for, sure.. But! People didn't immediately assume it. Men could be openly affectionate and nobody thought it was strange, because it simply wasn't in the forefront of suspicion. Even extremely flamboyant and effeminate men wouldn't even be suspected, especially if they had a wife. It would just be a... personality. Of a less masculine sort. Maybe become the brunt of teasing, but still; no crime, no case.

it was actually a very difficult thing to prove without a reliable eyewitness or caught-in-the-act of buggery.

Because of our political atmosphere today, men being affectionate towards each other is waaaaay more scrutinized. And it would thus affect him much more.

That aside though!

He would have access to medication, now. Though not always have the money to pay for it. He could also get his GAD and seasonal depression diagnosed, not that it would do a huge difference.

Another difference is that he's much less social in the modern AU. He's an extrovert who loves people, but isolates himself as a way to minimize the impact of his death.

Speaking of death - he has an active suicide plan in modern day, while in the 1660s, he's only fantasizing about it most of the time. (except the time when he did try to hang himself in ttocw)

Caleb isn't doing well, and can't always emotionally connect with Philip. He's tired. And the brothers have this unsaid thing between them were.. They don't pry into each other's private lives.

Caleb don't follow Philip on all his social media (just one, photogram), and respects Philip's privacy. This gives him the blanket of being able to tell Philip not to pry on him either, or ask questions.

Only causing the divide to broaden between them.

Caleb consciously make an effort not to tell Philip anything. Even when Philip straight up asks. Caleb shrugs, ignores, and leaves the conversation in silence. In Caleb's mind, he's keeping Philip safe from him.

Philip is too young to remember their mother, or what she was like. But she used Caleb as her entire emotional support system. He took care of her, and the home, and of Philip, even as a kid. And Caleb doesn't want to repeat the cycle - so he completely avoids it all together.

Only making Philip feel like a bother.

They're both grieving their parents in different ways. And they never talk about it. Mainly because Caleb just won't open the lid. And there's nobody else for Pip to turn to.

Until Evelyn.

Who flicks the switch in the Wittebane house and illuminates the situation.

Caleb has grown up believing that if he's vulnerable, or asks for help, he's a burden and a failure. Tie that in with the church giving him both praise and pressure to be a reliable hetero traditional man, too.

Most of his friends from school moved away, made careers, got married - you know, the typical pipeline. And lost touch with most, or can't find the time. And when you say no enough times, people stop asking to hang out.

Caleb never got to even begin the pipeline. He had to work after school, he flunked high school because he missed classes and didn't score high. He skipped out on trying out the baseball team, that could've helped him out, because Philip was sick, and he always chose his brother first.

He gave up on looking for opportunities, or having dreams. His only real social support came from the church.

Caleb is a lot more isolated in the modern AU. He has more resources, sure. But he's got nobody he feels safe with.

In 1660s, Caleb is terrified of horses. In modern AU, he's scared of sitting in a car.

They have a car, and it's remaining under a tarp on their driveway. He's only keeping it in case Philip wants to learn to drive someday. But although he himself can drive, he can't do it.

He will look at the car from his bedroom window, and to him, it's just a ghost made of metal.

Caleb listens to audiobooks people at church gives him, which aren't always helpful. Rarely so. Most just sound like conversion therapy to cover most sins.

Caleb doesn't seek out things he enjoys because he feels broken and unrepairable, and he's afraid of people will find out. He rather be remembered as the person they think he is.

And then there's Evelyn. Cartwheeling through his life like a cloud of rainbows. And she made him laugh, a real laugh. The kind that bubbles. :3

And he forgets he has a suicide plan when she's around. He feels like himself, and he doesn't hate who he is.

Perhaps because Evelyn is so unapologetically herself, he just felt compelled to do the same.

She doesn't cure his mental health. That's not how it works. But when someone makes you feel like a real person again, it sure does help.

[ptiza-sinitza]

Inna Cents - townie makeover

Inna Cent appears in trailers and promos for  The Sims 4: Vampires and could be load from Maxis gallery. I was pretty upset she was not an official townie of  Forgotten Hollow, cause there is smth interesting in her backstory and relationship with a sassy vampire Caleb. Anyway I can imagine my own LORe for her.

Occult sims are most fun to makeover because you can play with fashion and choose for them the most unusual and non-realistic fits. For Inna I choose some looks inspired by Biedermeier\Victorian period, because she probably was turn in to vampire at second half of 19th century. And her prototype surely was Lucy Westenra (from 'Dracula' 1992). But I add to her kinn list two fictional ladies who's also like yellow and historical dresses - Edith Cushing (Crimson Peak) and Belle (Beauty and the Beast) which suits more to her shinny and gentle personality and fashion choices. Roses and butterflies as symbols of her innocent soul

I'm trying not to change face features and keep the original EA genetics. But I changed Inna's skin and make her more pale. Because for me she is not alive anymore and can't be that peachy pink, because her blood system doesn't work. And I hope this doesn't look like 'white washing'

1. Hair by @thatonegreenleaf,roses hair pins by @kikiw-sims, corset by @astya96cc, skirt by @evellsims, puff sleeves by @dream-girl, rose brooch recolor by @elfdor, gloves by @sentate, necklace by @aladdin-the-simmer 2. Hair by @thatonegreenleaf, hat by marigold, dress by @shendori boots by @serenity-cc, tennis racket by @haneco410 3. Hair by @buzzardly28, hair accessory by @buzzardly28, dress by @strangestorytellersims, necklace by @regina-raven, lace fan by @simsonico, gloves by @atelierlena 4. Hair by @simandy, Dress by @belaloallure3, lacy turtleneck acc. by marigold, puff sleeves by @dream-girl, candelabra lights by moo2shelly, flying butterflies by @oydis, butterflies headpiece by glaza 5. Hair by @thatonegreenleaf, dress by @simnasimsworld, cape by @zouyousims, furr muff by @vintagesimstress, gloves by @bluecravingcc, little bird by @sims4-sin-a 6. Hair by @thatonegreenleaf, bonnet hat by @yuu-tori-tori, dress by @vintagesimstress, bouquet by @beocreations, gloves by @vibrantpixels

Big thanks and love to all CC creators!  

[ewa-jednak-chce-spac]

[literalite]

mistki's the land is inhospitable and so are we (2023)!! as edits featuring mine and some of my friends ocs 😁 had a lot of fun with this project... rough explainer of how/why each song corresponds to each character/s under the cut because i love symbolism and talking! sorry it is long

bug like an angel - sapphire

without spoiling too much of her story and arc... sapphire's life is not easy. she's hurt by people she cares for and who care for her, although inadvertently, and in turn hurts people who she cares for and who cared for her, also not by her own volition. it's kind of a terrible truth that you will harm and be harmed by the people you love, even when you and they truly don't want to. it's up to you how much you're willing to take and deal. you can't keep every promise you make and you can't right every wrong. but you have to keep trying anyway. that's sapphire's strength, and the core of her goodness and why i personally consider her one of my favourite ocs. i chose to depict bug like an angel in mitski's more positive interpretation here and in that light i think it works best for saph

buffalo replaced - heiya

well first and foremost the vibes of the song fits heiya perfectly fhgjk but also lyricism and tone... yep. quick breakdown of heiya's background since i doubt i'll ever be able to do it properly she's an interesting character for me because she like a lot of my other characters has lost. everything. she had a wife and a child and they were both killed and she had to leave her home again and again and unlike how some of my others would have taken this she has never flagged in her unwavering dedication to preserving hope. for herself for her people for the future etc etc. which is a very fucking difficult thing to do! the world changes faster than you can keep up with it sometimes but for heiya she will not let herself tire and be swept away in it all. people rely on her. she's a guiding star as much as she is a woman. she's a lover and a fighter and thats what buffalo replaced means to me! so

heaven - vinny and caleb

i feel like of all my oc couples so far they have like. the sweetest most kind of simply mutually trusting dare i say straight forward love. they just love each other so much and thats all. the world could end around them when theyre together and it'd be okay truly. also yeah vinny is ostensibly in heaven now bye angel i feel like this one was pretty self explanatory. me and who WHEN

i don't like my mind - sunny

he just like me fr (said in denji voice) anyways wow ha. unstoppable unending guilt due to past actions that haunt your every waking moment? throwing yourself into any and all distraction just to take your mind off it, filling your time with other shit so that past sin doesnt for once echo in your awful and hollow brain? this song is perfect for sunny honestly just that sentiment also the "please don't take this job from me".... sometimes the coping is worse. you can be proud of something because you can do it better than anyone else even if that thing is terrible

the deal - wolfgang munch by @gunthermunch

Wolfgang Amadeus Munch. umm this will make more sense later on but it still kind of makes sense now i think. he doesn't want to be himself he keeps . leaving and moving and running away from his own memories his own self in reaction to others. if he could pawn it all off he would. if he could be better in an instant without having to feel every agonising second of change he would! but thats not how the world works. or is it. read munch by gunthermunch thats an order

when memories snow - lilian

i feel the older you get the more your past kind of swells up and trails behind you... at least for lilian that is shes very linked to the different versions of the girl/young woman she used to be. for her its a double edged blade, a lot of her own strength is drawn from who she was and what happened to her throughout her life. they haunt her but she's haunting it back in her own way

my love mine all mine - saige, bellona, ari

stares you down okay so usage of this song very much almost verges into spoiler territory but uhm. uhm. starts twitching basically the whole dynamic here is . sometimes when you love you will sacrifice. and while that is usually a good thing sometimes it is not but sometimes it still is. sometimes you pay your dues for love and sometimes someone else has to pay for your love as well. and whether that is worth it to them remains to be seen. but it's all about love still. whether that's a worthy cause is up to you i suppose

the frost - yoshiki and hikaru from hikaru ga shida natsu

fun fact (or not so fun fact since i had it listed as such) this slot was originally meant to be taken up by a gojo/geto edit and while it still works for them frighteningly well i swerved to do another black and white haired doomed gay pairing gfhjkl; i really recommend yall to read hikaru ga shinda natsu/the summer that hikaru died because honestly it speaks for itself! it's SO good i love it so bad

star - ari and luca by @anjitrait

wow these two did not deserve the horrors the narrative (me) slammed down onto their heads. they're kind of the most married of all time to me but like of course under pressure even the strongest most loving of bonds will warp. they've been together for roughly a decade and a half now. they know and love each other as totally as you could possibly imagine. despite it all i am yours, no matter. are we picking up what i'm putting down chat

i'm your man - nayef and sióar by @lucidicer

after the album dropped like at least 3 people swung into my dms with a ?this you?? about this song which. i mean the fucking dogs that start barking halfway through the song. are you kidding me. but anyways sioyef and devotion. sioyef and putting yourself in your lover's hands and looking to them like they are a god. this is super self explanatory. you know

i love me after you - redacted and ophelia

HM.... all i'll say here is that sometimes the homoerotic tension filled high school friendship where both parties have something very wrong with them but in totally different directions can be. scarring. bad. sometimes love just isn't enough when you don't know what you're meant to do with it and when you've lived in survival mode all your life. but that once the dust clears you can scrape yourself off the ground get up keep going and that isn't gonna be the end for you there. or for love, even. sometimes shit just ain't meant to be and thats ok

[sunwarmed-ash]

Sinful Sunday Post

Tomorrow's gonna be some heavy angst (as is appropriate for my #1 most hated holiday) so if you want some smut make sure you check out the masterlists!

🔥Sinful Sunday Masterlist🔥

🕶👑Stranger Things Masterlist🦇🚬🕶

Stay safe my loves, I wish you all a stressfree weekend. But if you grieve by reading sad shit, come check back Sunday for chapter 2 of Eastside!

[candyskiez]

usually I hate possession plots but god,I love the possessed hunter plot. because it's just so painfully resonant as an abuse victim. especially to anyone who's been abused by bigots.

like. this outside force you once loved, you spent so much of your time trying to please, so much of your time begging for the approval of, isolates you. they cause you to grow paranoid and angry, snapping at people and pushing you away from your support system. makes you seem crazy to your loved ones, making them doubt your mental health and making you question your sense of reality because you can't tell what's real or not anymore (gaslighting, baby!) you're cut off and overwhelmed. you get put in situations where you're forced to do things you don't want to, you're in so much pain, you're being treated like something with no wants or thoughts of their own. you're stripped of your autonomy. you're belittled for what you wanted and told THIS is how you're supposed to be, and you're so miserable. you're pitted against your loved ones. your abuser tries to make all your loved ones hate you so you come back to them, so they don't lose you. and belos being a horrifically realistic portrayal of an IRL abuser makes this so much worse. he craves Caleb's attention and tries to force hunter to fill that void. nevermind HES the one who robbed himself of caleb in his life by killing him. he tries to make hunter his shoulder to cry on, his therapist, his punching bag, his doctor. uses him to look at himself and go "see! look how good I'm doing! my family is back and he finally loves me again!" , he is obsessive and horrible and cruel and so horrifically realistic. he strips hunter of his autonomy, and in the shit that will start sounding familiar to people who grew up in bigoted families:

forced him out of what made him most comfortable. literally grew out his hair against his will, treated how he'd changed his body and wardrobe to make himself more comfortable as something that tainted him.

also just. holy shit the violating him like that. just the fucking undertones. it's fucking horrific.

and that's why him fighting back is so huge. because he has the strength to say, no. fuck you, no. this is my goddamn body. this is my goddamn life. he takes all these things he LOVED. he loved, that belos had taught him he was sinful and a horrible person for not despising (hm, allegories) and says, fuck you, I WANT this. I want this, I love this, you tried to teach me to hate it but I don't. I love it. I love it, and you didn't break me. I want to leave the coven, I want to leave you. you hurt me, and I said sorry. you used me, and I said sorry. I am done being sorry. I am done feeling bad. I want this life you're trying to take from me. I want to go to the boiling isles and I want to have a life there, in that world you hate so much. I want to go to the boiling isles and be sinful and disgusting and everything you hate and I will love it. I will be happy. I will be free and everything you hate. and I miss when I thought I could please you, because it was simple. but I am happier as a heretic and as a sinner, and you can't change me. I tried to change myself for you, I just ended up miserable. you can't make me something I'm not. I tried. and I am done trying. I am hunter. fuck you, my name is hunter. my name is hunter, and you hurt people. it doesn't matter if you were trying to help me. you hurt me. and I am done, and I am leaving, and most of all I will never let you hurt anyone else like you hurt me.

and he fucking got it, man. he fucking got it. he went through HELL and he still came back swinging. the death feels symbolic to me almost? losing a part of you in traumatic events and you have to live without that part. and you got out but you lost pieces of you in the process, and that stays with you.

but he keeps going. he kept fucking going man and THAT is fucking amazing to me. he kept going. ohhh my god. I wish I had this when I was 13. hunter isn't as massive of a hyperfixation for me anymore by a long shot, but goddamn. I love this dude. I LOVED the possession scene so fucking much and it will always resonate with me so, so hard.