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#shower did Not heal me :\\\\\\
thebirdandhersong · 2 months
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I hate putting myself out there. just in case anyone needs to know
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keratonin · 4 months
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i just finished reading one last stop and 😭 help i'm mOURNFUL about the fact that i'm done reading it and will never read it for the first time ever again
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can't stop thinking abt how the fact that declan mattered so little to his father that the asshole couldn't even be bothered to keep the memories of the day his son was born was supposed to make up for declan's whole shitty childhood
like hey kid u know what u just weren't worth the pain. do u feel better abt it now.
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axemetaphor · 2 months
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it is still so surreal to me that I've had top surgery now. like yes I fought for this for literally months (since like March) but I never thought I'd get this far. what the fuck
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nomairuins · 18 days
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bedtime nowww probably ummm today qas not what i wanted it 2 be but its fine. i dont feel negative just a very very very numb day which is almost worse. but only almost 🙏
#i did get thr laundry done didnt fold it didnt take a shower#so thatll hopefuly be tmrw#i hope im able to do an activity with somebody tmrw.... the kids will be back at school so umm. no risk of weeman asking for my laptop in#the morning. or maybe me n lamp could play aa... idk#i feel like such a loser i go 1 day without bothering my family and im like wahhh im lonely. Can you shut up ..... we r better than this.#but wtvr. thats also a mean thought and i shouldnt be idolizing the way i lived last year. We were taking spongebaths and eating#1 bowl of soup a day crying ourselves to sleep every night and literally going weeks on end wo talking to our loved ones. so why am i like#We need to go back ! well i know why its bc i cant just let myself heal and move on bc of my stupid complex#and tbf i was very efficient back then. i ws able to do my spongebaths at least every 3 days and i did my laundry every week right on#schedule and i had a job....all it took was literally not being a person in any meaningful way FJFNGJGN. idk#it was very simple. its still very simple perhaps simpler (#no job) but instead i just feel guilty i guess. sbt everything#which i ws doing last year but again i was too out of it to rly dwell. i just cried at work a lot abt it#but now its like. i dont have a job to go to to focus on. my interests/hobbies can only distract me for a few days maximum b4 they become#nothing 2 me. and then im just back in limbo again and it feels pointless#and even when its a 'good' phase of something actually keeping me distracted from everything its like. not. all it does is ruin my sleep#schedule again yk. ik im literally the timeloop guy so u think id loveee Everyday being exactly the same over and over and over but well i#dont. bc they arent actually the same day theyre just reminders that everything does keep fucking going but im stuck. which is the opposite#of what i want. and what id have if the beautiful timeloop would simply rescue me. wtvr tho.... she doesnt even know i exist 😥#little joke. IDK. like i said its better ig than having a truly miserable day but. man. i wish everything was better#i ws gonna say like it used to be but. yk. ive been depressed since i was like 7 its not like. idk. i wish i was born different and i wish#my head worked and i wish none of it had evrr happened. but itis ok. i cant think of a funny cutesy alternative to put here so we will just#say nothing. yay
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orcelito · 6 months
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My list of "reasons why this update is so late" for the next ITNL update just keeps growing longer
The next thing tacked on will be "I got strep throat (or something like it) so bad that I ended up literally bleeding from the throat :)"
Suffice to say, this is going to be an interesting summary of my life over the past few months 😂
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mainfaggot · 7 months
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there are people...who do this.. everyday...
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basslinegrave · 11 months
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was like waaahhh i didnt do shit todaaay only sewn one dumb fursuit tongue... but then i remembered that i also designed a new premade, searched for and ordered materials for it, called about an important doc appointment!! also put some laundry to wash so, in fact i did many things today that i can pat myself on the back for
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minasweep · 1 year
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being sleepy does so many things to a girl
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gatun-gatunesco · 1 year
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...
#that post about meeting people in the wild reminds me what my therapist said#“you should meet another person. after some healing of course” and at that time i did not thought so much about it#i was crying and sobbing so bad for me to process that information#but now that i remembered. how the hell will i do that without using a dating app?#imagining that i am already healed without trauma and willing to open my heart again for someone else#how would i: an asexual neurodivergent introvert. would find a compatible person in the wild? that is kind of impossible!#using a dating app? ugh. that is very wack. i do not know a single person who had a good experience using one of those#and truly. would i ever be fine to have romance again? the remaining romantic love i have is dying#the trauma changed me from greysexual to fully asexual. after years of self hate i was comfortable with my naked body#now that i am sex repulsed. i can not tolerate see my body. even in this hellish heat of summer i must have clothes. showering is a torture#would not be better to be Aroace and that is it? being free of all that partner stuff? just having more friends would not do the trick?#i can try to find a way to change and not want to have physical affection nor physical love. It always brought me trouble#but i doubt my therapist agrees. she was kind of serious about having another person with me#why i am not strong enough to do everything alone? why do i have to be prone to sickness? why the hell do i need physical love?!#is so gross and awful. i hate my body so much. why do you need that fucker? we can hug ourselfs! settle for that
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ilostyou · 1 year
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okay im back that was of the worst showers ive had in my life!
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midnighticee · 3 months
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I JUST FUCKING GOT OFF OF CRUTCHES A WEEK AGO AND I ALREADY FUCKED UP
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0097linersb · 2 months
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𝐑𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐇𝐞𝐫𝐞 (m)
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Pairings: Wooyoung x Reader
Genre: Smut
Word count: 15k ~
Warnings: It´s a smut so +18 MDNI pls
Follow me on twitter: wooyosgfreal <3
Part 2
────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──────
As someone who has been single for the past 2 years, you often found yourself missing certain things and feelings. It´s not even the dating in itself that you craved, you were in fact, very content with being alone, and after all your inner healing and growth, you didn´t even think you were ready for a relationship at this point in your life. But as you and Wooyoung were on your couch lazily spending the afternoon, you found your body and mind screaming for comfort at the sight of the rainy day outside. 
Your friend had his head on your lap as he played some online shooting game on his phone, the movie you intended on watching now only serving as background noise as you drifted off, hands absent-mindedly playing with the strands of his hair that fell on top of your thighs.  
Hand-holding. 
That´s something you really missed. The feeling of interlacing fingers with someone as warmness spread through your body. When you were dating, you weren´t even that into holding hands, uncomfortable with not being able to move freely or with the way your palm seemed to always feel clammy – But now? You would kill for a chance to walk around a park linked with someone.  
You also really missed being so familiar with someone that you just felt at ease, having a person there to do nothing or everything with, being able to talk or gossip about anything. You remember spamming Mingyu´s chat with every little thing that happened during your day and him just being genuinely happy to hear about it, replying to every single message in order. As your best friend, Wooyoung was someone you talked to a lot, but you still couldn´t text him about how you already drank 6 glasses of water or how you were annoyed because your stapler kept getting stuck – Those are the annoying little things you only get to share with a significant other that has the obligation to put up with you. 
And showering together. You almost felt dramatic tears fill your eyes at the thought of it; sharing the hot stream of water with someone, have them rub soap down your back or massage shampoo onto your scalp, or just simply holding someone in the dark under the running water as steam filled the room.  
Oh, and free massages. You definitely missed those, being able to ask for a massage at whatever given moment with the certainness that you would receive one. Mingyu´s love language had always been acts of service, meaning you wouldn´t spend a single day without his hands squeezing your shoulders or rubbing down your back.  
Maybe you should call Mingyu. Something along the lines of “hey, I know we broke up a few years ago but can you come like, hold me for a minute? Cuddle until we fall asleep?” 
You were so touch deprived you could cry. 
There was also the intimate part of a relationship; You had tried casual sex, one-night stands, friends with benefits, even a Tinder hook up once – It just wasn´t for you. It´s not even the sex on itself that you longed for, you could spend another few years without it if it came down to it. But you did miss what came with being intimate with someone who truly cared about you. When it comes to casual flings, people are normally selfish (yourself included), doing the bare minimum to get the other person off but truly aiming for their own pleasure; it was nice being with someone who´s main priority was making you feel good without the need of having the “favor returned”.  
What you really did miss though, was a bit cruder: You missed the feeling of someone´s dick in your mouth, the groans and whines that came with it, hands tangled in your hair, your tongue tracing hot veins as someone praised you. You missed having someone´s fingers inside of you, your walls tight around them as they pumped in and out of you with ease. You also really fucking missed someone eating you out. 
You subconsciously pulled a bit on Wooyoung´s hair out of frustration but he didn´t seem to notice, eyes fixated on his game. You gently pat his head where you had tugged on the strands and went back to playing with his hair, letting your mind take you away once again.  
Again, it´s not like your relationship with Mingyu ended badly, surely, he wouldn´t mind if you called him up to go down memory lane for a night- 
You had never noticed how plump Wooyoung´s lips were.  
He had a habit of pouting when he was focused, or biting on his lips when he was extra concentrated – which he was doing just now as he tried to shoot at someone who was trying to kill him. When he finally managed to take out the other player and escape, he let his bottom lip go, now all red and glistening as he cursed out loud. They just looked so soft and plushy, and the mole he had on his bottom lip –  
You suddenly realized you were kind of obsessed with Wooyoung´s nose shape. You know what people say about big noses… Also, how good would it feel bumping against - 
“You´re being way too nice. What´s going on?” Wooyoung´s voice suddenly interrupted your thoughts, causing you to jump in shock and realization that you were just thinking about your friend eating you out.  
“I am nice, just not to you,” You correct, meeting his eyes which were looking up as you noticed you were still running your fingers through his hair. 
“I have very strong opinions about that, but either way, it´s what I meant. Why are you being nice to me?” 
“Am I?” 
“I remember very clearly the last time I asked you to cuddle me, almost got down on my knees begging and you just looked at me like I had rolled around in the trash.”  
“You were quiet today, behaving like a normal person-” 
“Go on, call me a good boy. I know you want to,” He rolls his eyes. 
You laugh out loud at that; he did know you well. 
“Nah, you´ve ruined it the moment you opened your mouth.” 
“Guess I´m a bit further from perfect than I thought, getting there though. How was the movie anyways?” 
“Oh, did it end already?” You asked, finally looking at the TV and realizing the credits must have been rolling for a while. “Wasn´t paying attention.” 
“What were you even doing?” He furrowed his eyebrows at you, a second away from calling you stupid. 
“Thinking.” 
“About?” 
“Calling Mingyu,” You half-lied. 
At that, he managed to furrow his eyebrows even more, the biggest judgmental face he had ever sported looking up at you, “Why? Are you suddenly into him again?” 
“No.” 
“Then why?” 
“I don´t know, just-” 
“Oh my god,” His eyes widened, and he covered his mouth in shock. “It´s a booty call.” 
“It´s that what people call it these days?”  You ask, trying to sound nonchalant about the whole ordeal. 
“Oh my god, so it is.” 
“I guess?” 
“Y/N, it´s been like 2 years. I know you´re hot and he´s a man but I think that conversation would be kind of weird. Were you planning on texting him a wanna come smash?” He questioned you as he sat up. “Do you even have his number?” 
“No, I - I don´t know. I-  Let´s change the subject.” 
“Let´s absolutely not.” 
“You´re being annoying.” 
“Aren´t I always?” 
“Yes, defin-” 
“If you´re horny, why don´t you text that last guy you were going out with? He was hot too.” 
“Ew, don´t use the word horny.” 
“Would you prefer I call you needy?” 
Maybe you would, yeah, very much. 
“No, ew. Just stop talking all-together.” 
“So, why don´t you text him?” 
“You know I can´t really enjoy it much when I´m not like, close to the person.” 
“So you thought of your ex,” he deadpanned. 
“Yeah.” 
“Has literally not even one of the guys you hooked up with gotten you off?” 
“I mean, some of them did. But I don´t want to just get off, I-I- I don´t even know what I want, can we please chan-” 
“You want to be treated like the little pillow princess you are, got it.” 
Did he have to say it like that? Suddenly you felt the pulse between your legs raising its intensity. Oh god no, you were absolutely not getting turned on by Wooyoung´s crude choice of words. 
Anyone but Wooyoung! 
“Who says I´m a pillow princess? Am not!” 
“Ah, please. You scream I´ll bring nothing to the table besides looking pretty.” 
“Is that how I come off as?” You gasped at that, feeling deeply offended. “You´re full of shit.” 
“Why are you even getting mad? There´s nothing wrong with that, I´m sure you´re really good at looking pretty under a guy.” 
“Please stop picturing someone else fucking me?” 
“Who says I´m picturing someone else?” He winked at you teasingly. 
You literally, in your over 20 years of life on this earth, have never - not even once - thought you would actually choke over someone´s words. This was Wooyoung, you were used to his ways, c´mon! 
“Yeah, let´s not do that.” 
“Awn, pretty princess got flustered,” He cooed at you. 
You knew he was just teasing you; you knew there was no real sexual intent behind his words because that was Wooyoung, he flirted and teased as naturally as he breathed - but they still got your thighs tensing and you hating yourself for it. Couldn´t you just take a joke for what it was? 
“Although now that I´m thinking about it, I wouldn´t be surprised if you turned out to be a brat in bed. You´re already the biggest one normally.” 
“Look who´s calling me a brat,” You rolled your eyes once again. It didn´t matter if he was right or wrong, Wooyoung had no right calling anyone that when he was the way he was.  
At that, he presented you with the most attractive smile you think would ever exist in the world, a mixture between cunning, excitement and condescending, “You think I´m bratty?” 
“Oh, I´m sure of it.” 
“Maybe I´m just good at matching energies, you know?” He winked, teasing you further. 
“Fuck off. I know San forced you on your knees more often than I´d like to imagine.” 
“Because I allowed him to.” 
You snorted, “Yeah. Sure thing, honey. Now let´s move along, please.” 
Except that, your mind decided to in fact, consider his words. Wooyoung liked teasing and annoying people for his own entertainment, he whined at you every time he didn´t get things his way and he was always playfully flirting with everyone - and you meant literally everyone. Because of that, you had always just kind of assumed (but never spared it many thoughts, thank God) that your best friend was just someone who like to be dominated when in relationships, or sexual encounters for the matter.  
But honestly, you could kind of see it differently after his comments. It was true he always had everyone wrapped around his fingers and somehow, he always managed to get things his way - Wasn´t that also some form of control? The lines were kind of blurred when it came to Jung Wooyoung, but that was kind of even more attractive to you.   
“Oh my god, you´re thinking about it,” Wooyoung teased.  
“You´re the one who started it!” 
“You don´t have to stress your pretty little head over it,” He smiled, his finger finding it´s place under your chin to tip your face in his direction playfully. “I can show you.” 
Oh, absolutely not. 
Your eyes fluttered shut for a millisecond at his words, your guard crumbling surprisingly fast as you practically whimpered, “I know you´re joking but can we please not?” 
“Why?” 
 Couldn´t he stop giving you that annoying freaking smile? 
“Because I am kind of horny and I really don´t want to go there,” You practically growled.  
Now he was the one who broke character, not expecting you to be actually affected by his jokes, before the teasing smile was back on his face in a heartbeat - but you saw it. 
“Did I make you horny?” He teased. 
“Of course not, I was already horny before. I´m just in a weird mood.” 
It wasn´t necessarily a lie. If you weren´t already feeling some type of way since earlier, you would have never - and you really mean that - caught yourself thinking about Wooyoung´s stupid plump lips or if he could actually fuck you.  
“So, you were thinking about getting dicked down while I was here innocently lying down on your lap? You´re dirty,” He snickered. 
“It wasn´t weird until you made it weird,” You groaned in frustration. This is really not how you imagined your afternoon would go down.  
“Want me to help you out?” 
“Got any hot friends who are also not my friends?” 
“I do,” He nodded with his head. “But I´m also right here.” 
Your eyes almost flew out of your head. You always judged yourself as the only person immune to Wooyoung's weirdness, deeming that nothing the man did or say would ever surprise you since you basically were the same - but you now guessed the tests became harder as the years passed.  
“I can´t really tell if you´re joking-“ 
“I am absolutely not.” 
“Yeah, not going to happen.” 
“Why?” 
“Because!” 
“I know you can use your big girl words.” 
“Because as much as it pains me to admit it, we´re best friends. I guess?” 
“Now you´re the one who´s making it weird. You´re hot, I´m hot. You´re horny, now I´m horny. What´s wrong with helping each other out?” 
“What´s wrong is that I never really saw you like that!” You whined. 
“But you´re seeing now.” 
“Yeah, and I don´t like it!” 
“Tell me,” He raised an eyebrow at you, a devilish glint on his eyes matching his smile once again.  
“What?” 
“What you imagined me doing to you.” 
“Oh my god. Nothing!” 
“Oh c´mon, I won´t think you´re in love with me or anything. I know we´re friends and I´m a man, if there is one thing I can understand is simple plain old horniness.”  
“How is this so easy for you?” 
“Oh, I already imagined fucking you many times. In many different ways, too,” Wooyoung stated so casually, like he was talking about his shopping list for when he went to the supermarket later. “You know that one time at Seonghwa´s pool when you were wearing that little orange bikini? I must have made up at least 4 different scenarios, just that day.” 
“I feel kind of violated?”  
You also felt the way something throbbed in between your legs at his words but he didn´t need to know that. 
“As I said: I´m a man, Y/N. I love you and would never do anything to make you uncomfortable or fuck up our friendship, but there´s nothing wrong with fantasizing. It´s not like I actively decide to do it either, it just happens, I don´t know.” 
“Do you just casually think about fucking all your friends?” 
“No, only the hot ones. And it´s not something I keep thinking about all the time, I´m not a creep. Just once every blue moon hormone takes over or something. Also, you´re a fool if you think any of your other friends who are into women have never, not even once, thought about fucking you.”  
“Yeah, I´d rather be a fool,” You rolled your eyes. “Also, San hasn´t!” 
“San would quit his dream job in a heartbeat if I called him over for a threesome right now.” 
“Yunho then! He would never -” 
Wooyoung laughed at that, “Honey, I have something to tell you-“ 
“Please don´t.” 
“Anyways, you´re not lacking options to help you out. All I´m saying is that I´m here and I´d be more than glad to be the one,” He had the audacity of winking at you. “Since you were already thinking about it.” 
“I´m begging you to please drop it.” 
“Only if you tell me what you were thinking about.” 
“Oh my god! You know what? Let´s play your stupid fucking game, Jung Wooyoung. I´ll tell you if you tell me first.” 
“So, you do know how to have fun,” Wooyoung gave you a big smile, his eyes disappearing in happiness as if you had just told him you got him a new car. “What do you want to know?” 
“About the day at Seonghwa´s pool.” 
“Fun. I will use your own words then: I was in a weird mood that day and then you just took your clothes off and looked so good in that bikini. You were sunbathing and at some point in the afternoon you went inside Hwa´s house to get something from the kitchen and my brain just kept flashing images in my head: what if I followed you into the empty house, pushed you against the nearest wall and fucked you, watching as you tried to keep quiet so the others wouldn´t hear from right outside? Your cheek red from rubbing against the wall, your -” 
“That´s scenario number one.” 
“You want all of them? Kinky.” 
“I can just go-“ 
“Calm down, princess. See? I knew you were a brat.” 
“Wooyo-“ 
“Later when I was sitting down on the sunbathing chair with you while you were helping me out with the sunscreen, I noticed how my hand was so close I could pull the bottom of your bikini to the side and just slip my fingers in, right there in the open, no one would even notice. I wondered if you were already going to be wet and how you would sound trying to keep your noises inside with my knuckles deep into you. I couldn´t imagine a better sight than you all pretty clenching around my fingers or how you would look trying to casually spread your legs for me without anyone suspecting. I even went as far as imagining us getting caught, can you picture Mingi noticing what a little slut you are and trying to watch without getting caught himself? Poor boy wouldn´t know what to do with himself, would just loose his mind at how hot you´d look. I wondered if you´d like that he was watching –“ 
“That´s scenario number two,” You interrupted before the skin where you dug your nails into could start bleeding from your efforts to ground yourself and not squirm like an animal in heat at Wooyoung´s words. 
He was good, you had to give him that.  
Wooyoung laughed at you and you wondered if he had any clue about what he was doing to you. Then you mentally slapped yourself because of course he did, he had eyes.  
“When everyone went inside to make some drinks and start on dinner, you sat there on the edge of the pool and started kicking water at me. Remember that? I happened to notice the edge was just the perfect height for me to eat you out from the pool, and you even had your back to the door. We were all alone out there and even if someone came out, I would be hidden from their view in between your legs. I could picture my hands holding your thighs open and your back arching-” 
“Yeah, ok. That´s enough. I´m going to go, humm, shower or something and you can just like leave-” 
“Can I join?” He joked as you stood up. 
“No.” 
“Can I at least stay outside listening?” 
“What? I´m not going to mastu- Wooyoung, I´m just taking a cold shower.” 
“OK, go cool yourself off, princess. I´ll wait for you here,” He informed, unlocking his phone once again and showing you his screen where his game was loading. 
“Yeah, ok. Suit yourself.” 
“You really should let me listen as payback for getting me horny,” He screamed once you were already down the hallway. 
“You got yourself horny,” You screamed back before shutting the bathroom door behind yourself. 
You silently screamed against your hands as you let your body slide down the door. 
What the hell just happened? How many lines did you just cross?  
Why was Wooyoung suddenly so hot? 
And so, a cold shower you took and thankfully, after you left the bathroom, no one talked about the subject for the rest of the night and just pretended that nothing had happened. 
Except that now you were miserable and your mind echoed Wooyoung´s words every time you looked or thought about him. It was not optimal to be crossing your legs in the middle of class at university because you accidentally caught yourself staring at your friend´s veiny arms for half of the lecture. 
★  
“You´re still horny,” Wooyoung stated a few days later when you were literally getting ice cream after class. 
“And I´m actually mortified that you noticed.” 
“You´re being stubborn.” 
“We´re not fucking, Wooyoung.” 
“Dude, at this point I am genuinely feeling bad for you. We can ask Mingi or whoever, just please get some dick.” 
“You´re being kind of sexist-” 
“Y/N, you look constipated. I am worried for your sanity.” 
“Just shut up before I stop talking to you.” 
“I can use a blindfold or something if you´re worried about me seeing you naked-” 
“You´d like that, wouldn´t you? Submissive bitch.” 
“Don´t degrade me unless you mean it,” He winked at you. 
“You are actually insufferable.” 
“I´m just trying to help.” 
“You can´t because you don´t understand that this isn´t just about getting some dick!” 
“So what is this about? You tense every time my hands get near you -” 
“Wooyoung, this is an ice cream parlor. There are kids around, just shut the fuck up.” 
“So let´s go to my place.” 
“I´m not getting inside any closed spaces with you unless there are more people around.” 
“Kinky.” 
“Oh my god, you know what I mean.” 
“I know, just let me tease you. Ok, but seriously now, I think that in order for me to do my duties as a best friend, I need to understand what´s going on.” 
“Since when do you care about your best friend duties? You once left me behind alone at a party to get fucked by Yeonjun or whatever you two-” 
“Allegedly.” 
“No, Wooyoung. Not allegedly, it was literally me that you dragged to a corner to inform you´d be going upstairs with Yeonjun-” 
“No one knows what happened in that room.” 
“Yeah, thank god.” 
“Ok, whatever. Let me help you, tell me what´s going on inside that little messed up brain of yours.” 
“Nop. I really would rather lock myself inside the industrial freezer in the back.” 
“Yeah? Then I´m texting Mingi to go to your place and give you the fuck of your life tonight-” 
“Wooyoung!” 
“Y/N!” 
“Just drop it.” 
“No! Do you actually miss Mingyu? Or dating? Do you want a boyfriend? Is that it?” 
“No,” You groaned, hitting your forehead against the table.  
“So?” 
“Just- I need alcohol if we´re going to talk about this.” 
“Ok, let´s go to-” 
“Wooyoung, it´s 2 in the afternoon.” 
And so, he let it go for the moment, but the next time he saw a single drop of alcohol near you, he sat down next to you and crossed his hands like he meant business, a pointed look on his face. 
★ 
“So?” 
“This is literally my first shot.” 
“Then take it.” 
“Fine,” You begrudgingly complied, and you hadn´t even placed your glass back down before Wooyoung was already pouring you more. Figuring you weren´t going to escape this conversation, you downed your second shot and sighed in defeat. 
“Now tell me why you aren´t getting your back blown out at this very moment.” 
“It´s really weird talking about sex with you.” 
“We talk about sex all the time.” 
“Yeah, about other people, not about me, or about you suddenly being willing to fuck me- “ 
“Not suddenly.” 
“Yeah, whatever. Pour me some more.” 
“That´s what I like to hear,” He smirked at you, eyes glinting as he filled your glass up.  
“Y/N looks miserable,” Mingi suddenly stated, dropping his body next to you on the couch coming from seemingly nowhere.  
“Doesn´t she?” Wooyoung agreed, giving you a pointed look as you punched Mingi for the out-of-pocket comment. 
“Where did you even come from?” You asked the tall man next to you, excited for a change of topic. 
“The kitchen,” He absentmindedly answered you, hand busy filling up the glasses in front of you before handing you one. “Take a shot with me.” 
And so you did, hissing at the burning sensation and taking deep breaths to not gag at the taste of tequila. 
“OK, why does it look like your house burned down?” The man turned his attention back to you after smashing the empty glass on the little center table in front of you. 
Damn it, Mingi. 
You didn´t even have the time to begin forming any kind of excuses before Wooyoung  answered for you in a heartbeat, “Little Y/N over here is horny.” 
“Jung Wooyoung!” You gasped at his choice of words, thorn between hiding behind your hands, punching the man and apologizing to Mingi. 
Mingi, in turn, was frozen in shock mid pouring himself another shot. And you meant that the man wasn´t even blinking, mouth open and hands stuck in the air holding the glass bottle which you took from him afraid he would break it. 
“See what you´ve done?” You sighed to Wooyoung, elbowing his ribs as you tried waving your hand in front of Mingi´s face for a reaction.  
“Wait, what?” Said man came back to life, his voice way higher than what you´re used to. 
“You heard it, man. She hasn´t been fucked right in ages-” 
“Wooyoung, you know what you said about wanting to keep up with your best friend´s duties?” You asked between gritted teeth, about ready to jump the man and rip all of his hair out. “This is really not it.” 
“But you´re hot!” Mingi seemed confused. 
“I told her that!” Wooyoung ignored you. “I even told her you´d volunteer to help her out-” 
“I so would-” 
“Shut the fuck up, you two! Wooyoung, I´m about a second away from blocking you on my phone and never seeing you again,” You were also as close to ripping your own hair out. “Yes I´m horny, the whole world doesn´t need to hear about it.”  
Mingi noticed the crazy look behind your eyes and rubbed your back in comfort, he too knew what Wooyoung could do to people when he decided to be annoying.  
“It´s ok, love. We´ve all been there,” Mingi assured you and his words did soothe you a bit.  
“It´s just – You guys don´t get it. It´s not about just sex. I know I could literally fuck anyone at this party if I wanted to, I´m not dense. I guess I just miss dating but I don´t really want to date anyone at the moment?” 
“So like a friends with benefits thing?” Wooyoung pressed. 
“No, that´s just fucking with a fancy title. I mean like, I miss being touched and hugged and pampered and – I don´t know.” 
“Every time I try to hug you, you freeze and glare at me!” Mingi pouted. 
“I´m just not a touchy person!” 
“I know! That´s why I´m not understanding what you want.” 
“Just forget it-” 
“I get it,” Wooyoung interrupted.  
“Do you?” 
“Yeah.” 
“Are you sure?” 
“You want a boyfriend without the obligations and feelings involved with a relationship. I was right, you´re needy.” 
“Oh,” Apparently it made sense to Mingi too. 
“Ok, and with that, I excuse myself,” You say, already standing up to go find someone else to hang out with because you were definitely not ready for the rest of that conversation. 
★ 
“What are you doing here?” You asked in annoyance after opening the door to your place to a very content looking Wooyoung. 
"I came to be your boyfriend-not-boyfriend,” He smiled proudly. 
"We're not fucking, Wooyoung,” You managed to sigh and roll your eyes at the same time. "Which is exactly what I told you the other 50 times you suggested it." 
"Who said anything about fucking? I'm just here to force the touch-deprivation out of you. Now move, I brought snacks," He said as if he hadn't already pushed you out of the way about midway through his sentence.   
You sighed in defeat, accepting your peaceful quiet night was ruined - You hadn't even locked the door yet and Wooyoung was already sprawled on your couch organizing the snacks on your coffee table, making way more noise than necessary.  
"At least you brought my favorite," You noticed, arms crossed as you stood up next to the couch.  
"These are all your favorites," His eyes were even shining with the amount of pride he had for himself. 
"Says who?" 
"Says me." 
"You called Seonghwa, didn't you?" 
"Only about the chips." 
"Knew it." 
"It's not my fault you literally change your opinions every day." 
"Welcome to girlhood." 
"Now sit down and I'll put something on Netflix." 
"Wooyoung, why-" 
"Y/N, listen," It was his turn to sigh. "You helped me through a lot when everything happened with my grandpa and you were always there for me when shit went down, just let me help you this once however I can." 
"Ok, got it. Enough with the sentimental talk," You quickly obeyed. You didn't like serious Wooyoung.  
"Now, are we feeling Criminal Minds?" He asked once you were sitting next to him, remote in hand. 
"Sounds great." 
“Perfect,” Wooyoung agreed as he put on the show, quickly standing up to turn off the lights before sitting back down and opening his arms. “Come here.” 
“Uh, I would rather not.” 
“I don´t care, we´re doing this.” 
“I don´t think forcing me to cuddle you will help much-” 
“Do you want me to really force you? Because I can,” He raised his eyebrow at you, arms still hanging in the air. 
“I´m pretty sure I´m stronger than you-” 
“Oh my god, just shut up,” He groaned and rolled his eyes at the same time, bending his body forward so he could grab onto your waist and pull you against his chest.  
Ok, yeah. He was definitely stronger than you. 
“Can you not make it so difficult?” He asked once he noticed how stiff you were in between his legs. “Stretch your legs, relax.” 
You decided against reminding him that he was in fact forcing you to do this and obeyed, he was just trying to help after all and maybe he did have a point: Some human touch might help calm your mind down. Also, the quicker you played along, the sooner it would be over.  So, stretching your legs across the couch you did, letting your body relax against Wooyoung´s, who contently wrapped his arms around you as you both turned your attention towards the Tv.  
Well, that lasted for about 10 minutes before you started feeling the heat of your friend´s skin radiating and everything started making sense: Being held by someone you loved really was comforting. Huh, who would have guessed? 
You generally hated being touched by people but right now you kind of felt like a cat, wanting to rub your head on Wooyoung´s shirt and snuggle into his warmth.  
“Can I play with your hair or will you bite my hand of?”  
“You can try,” You answered, not wanting to admit he was right all along and that you would very much like more of whatever this was.  
You could practically feel the roll of his eyes at your threatening tone as he pulled your head like you were just one big barbie doll, so your right cheek would be rested against his chest, turning your body to the side so now your right shoulder kind of met his chest instead of your back.  
“Ouch, you could be gentler,” You complained, rubbing your forehead skin where his palm was planted seconds before.  
“When you deserve it,” He grunted, eyes fixed on the Tv.  
“That was not very let me help you of you.” 
It was easy to tell he bit back his comeback, simply taking a deep calming breath and burying his fingers in the hair behind your neck, gently rubbing the area – Maybe you would purr. Judging you now had the upper hand, you decided to in return wrap your own arms around his wait so you could get comfortable and Wooyoung  gave you a cocky victory smile. 
Damn it. 
The two of you went through the entire episode like that and you were so relaxed that when Wooyoung stood up to open the snacks and grab some wine, you didn´t even complain about how that was a bad idea, sharing some glasses while you watched the second and third episodes and he tossed you around into every cuddling position you never even knew existed, discussing who you though were the killers and all the little gossips of the week. 
“You could create like a cuddling Kama Sutra,” You joked, kind of dizzy because of the drink – or because you had an incredibly attractive man holding you for the past 2 hours or so.  
“Will you quit complaining about my touchy personality now?” He smiled. 
“Nah, this was a one-time thing.” 
“Are you at least feeling a bit better?” Wooyoung asked, adjusting himself on the couch to look at you since you were now sitting side to side after the last episode ended.  
“Yes, actually.” 
It was true, you were no longer feeling like you could rip your entire skin off if you went through another second of someone not touching you.  
“I have one last move prepared,” He informed excitedly. 
“We´re not fucki-” 
“Oh my god, will you quit it with the fucking thing? If you keep bringing It up I might start thinking you´re interested-” 
“What was the idea?” You quickly asked, trying to cut the flirting off before it could lead your brain somewhere you spent the entire night not wanting to go.  
“Let me give you a massage.” 
“Wow, you´re really invested in this helping me thing.”  
“Contrary to your big mouth, I am a good friend. Sit down right here,” Wooyoung ordered, opening his legs and pointing to the space on the floor in between his feet. “Tonight I´ll take the neediness out of you the best I can since you refuse to go out and get some dick.” 
You rolled your eyes and ignored his remark, sitting down where he showed you and waiting silently as he gently gathered your hair and moved it out of the way. You cursed at how your skin erupted in goosebumps as his fingertips brushed against the side of your neck, your breath suddenly caught in your chest. 
You followed the realization that this was probably a horrible idea with another glass of wine, thankful he couldn't feel your heart beating fast.  
Wooyoung worked his thumbs in circles, digging them between your scapulae and pressing them up until they reached your shoulders, which he squeezed in the perfect strength to get shivers running up your spine every minute as he repeated the motion over and over.  
“How are you so good at this?” You whined, hating how your body was reaction to the touches. 
“There´s really nothing I´m not good at.” 
“Humbleness,” You offered. 
“That was a cliché answer, you can do better than that.” 
“I don´t care, just please never stop.” 
“I get that a lot.” 
“Do you really need to make everything sexual?” 
“I´ve always been that way, it´s not my fault that now that you´re horny it´s bothering you.” 
You hated when he put it like that, because yes. 
And maybe the way he sometimes would squeeze your neck during the massage or just the fact that he was touching you, were getting you feeling some type of way you would rather he did not notice.  
“If you were a girl, you´d understand,” You groaned. “Ovulation sucks.” 
“You actually just gave yourself the perfect solution, why don´t you fuck a girl?” 
´Cause what I really want is fucking you. 
Oh, wow.  
Where did that come from? 
“Speaking of which, do you even know how to?” You ask, admittedly kind of shy of asking such question.  
“Know how to what?” 
“Like, have- you like- With women?” You try, motioning widely towards the couch with your hands as if it would help you get your point across so you wouldn´t have to say the words. 
Wooyoung seemed to get it though, hands suddenly stopping on your back so you would look at him, “Y/N, you do know I have fucked women, right?” 
“How would I? You never told me!” You whine. 
“I thought it would be disrespectful?” 
“But when you told me how much you loved choking on San´s dick it wasn´t?” 
“Well, no-” 
“Or when you literally shared about how you thought about your fingers inside of me?” 
“You asked for it!” 
“I don´t believe you,” You narrowed your eyes towards him. “There´s no way I wouldn´t have known.” 
“Do you want like a list or something?” 
“What? No! That would be disrespectful.” 
“See?” 
“Ok, no, wait. Just tell me this: Lauren?” 
“Yes.” 
“Wooyoung, nooooo!” You whined. 
“What? She´s hot!” He was exasperated. 
“Oh my god, everything makes so much sense now.” 
“Wait, did you really think I was gay? We´ve know each other for years! I talk about women all the time!” 
“Yeah, but I thought you talked about women like Kevin talks about Beyoncé! Like in a slayy pussy  queennn way, not in a I´d want to fuck her way.”  
“Would you like me to go around harassing women?” 
“No, listen: I didn´t think you were gay, I just kind of never thought about it?” 
"You though I was just joking around with you the other day and you still got all hot and bothered?" Would he quit teasing you? "Kinky." 
“I thought you were playing and I didn't get any way!" 
“Whatever you say, princess - Wait, why did you think Ali was always hanging around my neck all these months?” 
“I just thought she was kind of crazy – Wait, did you fuck her that good? She wouldn´t leave us alone for a second, it was driving me insane." 
“I just told you there´s nothing I´m not good at,” He winked at you with a cocky smile on his face. 
You wanted to die.  
“Wooyoung,” You warned. 
“Awn, am I getting to you?” His tone was so sarcastic and condescending that a fire burned inside of you that you were afraid was never going out.  
“It´s the wine,” You assured, more yourself than him. 
“It´s always something.” 
“See? That´s why I told you I didn´t want to be alone with you.” 
“Afraid you´ll jump me?” He mocked. “I´m not scared.” 
"Just shut up. If whatever you're saying is true, I just want you to know you have the worst taste in women ever." 
"Well, considering I would love to taste you more than I would anyone else, I agree," He played with your words.  
“Go wash the glasses,” You ordered, the skin under your cheeks burning.  
“Yes, ma’am,” He answered with a laugh, immediately standing up and following along.  
When you were alone in the living room, your face fell between your hands in despair. 
You fucking hated Jung Wooyoung and his fucking giant noise. 
★  
Stupid fucking Jung Wooyoung.  
Fucking hell.  
Cursed be the day that man was born and cursed be the hospital and the doctors and the nurses and everyone in the world for all you cared. 
Your entire body was filled with rage as you opened the stupid coffee maker to pour the water into the compartment – which you had of course forgotten to fill 10 minutes earlier and almost burnt the whole office down. How would you explain to your boss that you started a fire because your brain was simply too busy flashing images of you sitting on your stupid annoying best friend´s face for the past 4 hours? 
It has been 2 days since the day at your place, 2 nights since you've gotten a decent night of sleep. "Why is that?" One would ask. Well, the answer would be that your useless brain decided to sabotage you, having you dream about your best friend over and over again – Which wouldn't be so bad if 90% of the dreams didn't consist of you ridding said best friend's face, waking up sweating and wanting to scream. 
At this point you just wanted to break Wooyoung's nose with a punch, so you'd never have to think about it again. After almost ripping your hair out in front of your computer, you decided on texting Hoshi for Mingyu's number - That's how desperate you were to get stupid fucking Jung Wooyoung out of your head. At least your friend assured that your ex was indeed single now and still didn't hate you, which was enough for you.  
Not really knowing how to tell your ex-boyfriend, after so much time has passed, that you just wanted him to throw you around, things weren't going as fast as planned and you couldn't keep avoiding Wooyoung forever – One, because he has no sense of boundaries and would just show up at your place if you ignored him and two, you really didn't want to have the conversation that would go down when he found out why you weren't around.  
It'd been over a week since you last saw Wooyoung in person, you were still in the talking stages with Mingyu, dreaming about your friend every fucking night and staring at his picture on the chatting app for hours while wanting to die. Now, you kind of genuinely didn't care anymore, Mingi and Wooyoung were right, maybe this was just about getting some dick – and you would find out if one could die of horniness if you didn't get some soon.  
It was Saturday night, Hongjoong decided to throw a small party at his place to celebrate his birthday and you figured alcohol was a good solution since stabbing a knife into your brain wasn't an option. You even invited Mingyu, hoping in person and after a few drinks you'd figure how to ask him to bend you over – The man said he would be pretty late because of previous scheduled commitments but that he would go. Your ex was an incredibly attractive man who knew his way around a lady, maybe you would see all your problems flying away after tonight. 
Except that after your first cup and some chatting with Mingi and Seonghwa on Hongjoong's couch, Wooyoung decided to arrive.  
You took one (1) - ONE, UNO - look at the man and grabbed your phone, shooting Mingyu a text: don´t come, party´s canceled. 
“Bro, your hair looks sick!” Mingi shouted before your brain could even begin to process what you were seeing. 
You were the one actually about to be sick. 
“Decided to try something new,” Wooyoung smirked, jumping over the back of the couch to sit next to you. 
You simply stared at him dumbfounded, glad he was too busy stealing the drink from your hands to notice your mouth wide open.  
Jung Wooyoung just showed up to the party with the bottom part and the front strands of his hair dyed blonde and you weren´t sure what kind of look that even was but you felt like it genuinely changed your whole life. You were pretty sure you got goosebumps when you first looked at him, lucky you were sitting down with the way your legs got weak. 
“What do you think about it?” He asked you after he was content with finishing what was left in your cup. 
“I hate it.” 
Well, you weren´t lying. Your nails were literally digging into the palm of your hands to try and get your head back in place - The new look made his skin look tanner, the mole under his eye darker, the shape of his nose - 
 The way he pushed his hair back, blonde strands surrounding his face - 
No, nop. 
No. 
“Since I know you´re joking, I´m gonna go say hi to Hongjoong and grab us more drinks so we can get this party started.” 
You let him go with absolutely no fight, eyes wide and glued to his form until he was out of your sight as Seonghwa led him to where the birthday boy was supposed to be. 
“Are you ok?” Mingi asked, noticing the crazy look on your face. 
“I need Wooyoung to fuck me.” 
Your brain definitely was short-circuiting. 
“Oh. Wow. Ok.” 
“I´m being serious. And I´m not happy about it.” 
“Hasn´t he been offering for like weeks now?” 
“Yeah.” 
“So just go and tell him.” 
“That´s not how it works.” 
“Oh my god, why do you have to be so complicated?” 
“I need him to offer again so I can say no, then when he insists, I will give in and pretend I´m kind of thorn about it.” 
“And why is that?” 
“So he doesn´t know he won! And I don´t like being vulnerable or whatever.” 
“I know we said you need some dick, but maybe you just need some therapy.” 
“Yeah, that too, but what I really need right now is your help.” 
“Sure,” Mingi shrugged. That´s what you liked about him, things were simple with him. 
“I need him to think I´m horny.” 
“You are horny.” 
“Yeah, but I need him to see it so he will joke about helping me out again.” 
“And how are you going to do that?” 
“Well, I could stand here with a bitch face all night, but it´s Joong´s birthday so I don´t really want to be like that. I don´t really have any other ideas-” 
“Touch me.” 
“What?” 
“Like, be touchy with me.” 
“Oh, that could work.” 
“That will definitely work.” 
“You´re good,” You complimented. 
“You should come to me for help more often.” 
“Don´t push it.” 
“Fine.” 
“You´re invested, huh?” 
“Move closer,” He ordered and you obeyed, sitting sideways on the couch so you were turned towards him, left knee touching his thigh. “Lean forward and put your hand on my thigh.” 
Despite your body´s discontent, you did as told. 
“And don´t flinch when I touch you,” He warned.  
“I feel like a spy,” You joked. 
“All this because you can´t tell a guy you want to fuck,” He rolled his eyes. 
“C´mon, pretend you´re not enjoying this, I dare you.” 
“Touché.” 
When your friends came back with more people tagging along, the first thing you noticed was the way Wooyoung´s gaze traveled immediately to your hand on Mingi´s thighs.  
Ok, yeah, this could definitely work. 
“Here, princess,” He handed you your drink, which you grabbed with your free hand.  
“Thanks Wooyo,” You smiled at the man before turning your attention back to Mingi, not missing the way your friend squeezed his eyes at you.  
Thankfully, Wooyoung didn´t say anything about it, sitting down on the floor in front of the couch as a circle naturally formed in the living room so everyone could play something, and the first choice was the 007 game. You went along with the plan, hitting Mingi´s thigh instead of your own, touching his arm when you had to laugh, not going stiff when his hand met the skin almost at the hem of your skirt. 
You know what? Mingi was actually really hot too, if this night didn´t end how you expected it to, you were so horny you were just about considering asking him to fuck you.  
Whenever you looked in Wooyoung´s direction, you could practically see the engines turning in his head. It was just a matter of time now and you were already feeling shaky with excitement, which you weren´t exactly thrilled about – But then you looked at him again with that stupid hair and that stupid nose and that stupid half-unbuttoned shirt and decided that to hell with your morals and ethics. 
Mingi apparently decided his role in the ploy wasn´t enough for him, since after an hour or so passed by and people started standing up to go after more drinks or socialize with other people, he waited for Wooyoung to approach before asking loud and clear, “So, any luck with the getting some dick thing?” 
You were not exactly a good actress but you did know how to flirt, so not really knowing how else to react to the sudden improvisation, you smiled at him, “Why? Know someone interested?” 
“Yeah, nice to meet you. I´m Song Mingi,” He half-joked, hand still heavy on your thigh. “Oh, Wooyoung. You´re here, didn´t see you there.” 
He was good, you had to give him that. 
“I can see why,” Wooyoung answered, eyes pointing at the contact between you two.  
“Jealous?” Mingi asked his friend, his tone was humorous, but you could see the challenge in his eyes. Even though he was just playing, he couldn´t help being an egotistical Leo. 
“I wouldn´t say jealous is the right word.” 
“Did you know Y/N invited Mingyu over?” Mingi laughed. 
Wooyoung raised an eyebrow at you, eyes dancing with amusement.  
“I already uninvited him, asshole.” 
“Is that why you´re all touchy today?”  Mingi asked. Ok, you would have to buy him some ice cream after the phenomenal performance he was delivering. “Thought you would convince her to fuck someone, Woo.” 
“Believe me, I tried,” He shrugged. 
“Can we quit talking about me like I´m not here? Also, I´m not an animal in heat, stop being weird.” 
Well, weren´t you?  
Really? 
“You sure seem like it,” Wooyoung completed. 
“You look hornier than me, Wooyoung.” 
“I´m not denying it,” He stated matter-of-factly. 
“Oh shit, I forgot my phone with Yunho,” Mingi cursed, suddenly petting his pockets. He was so convincing you almost forgot he was helping you out. “Shit, shit, shit. I´ll be back later.” 
With that he stood up and quickly marched out of the living room, Wooyoung lazily taking his place next to you on the couch. 
“Were you really about to let Mingi fuck you?” 
“Maybe?” You answer, and well, that wasn´t a lie either. 
“Ouch, that kind of hurts my ego.” 
“Mingi and I are just friends, now you and I are best friends. There´s a huge difference there.” 
“So, you´re saying you´d fuck me if we weren´t best friends?” He joked. “Wow, thank you. I´m shy now. No need for all these compliments.” 
You rolled your eyes, not sure what to say that would lead you towards what you wanted, choosing to just be normal and hope the night would eventually get you there. 
“Why did you cancel on Mingyu?” 
“Didn´t think he would throw me around today.” 
“Someone´s getting bold.” 
“Shut up.” 
“I actually like frustrated Y/N, it´s hot.” 
“Then stop bothering me to fuck someone and let me be frustrated in peace.” 
“Well, that seems nice but I´m sure you´d look much hotter getting the frustration out.” 
“Are we back to the “you imagining someone fucking me” thing?” 
“I could correct you once again saying that I´m not imagining someone else, but since you´ve made it pretty clear that you´re not interested, I´m not going to.” 
That was it, that was your moment. 
“And what if I tell you maybe I am?” 
He stopped to give you a knowing cocky smirk that made you immediately regret raising the white flag, “I know.” 
“What? Ho- No -” 
“Y/N, you wouldn´t stop staring at me like you wanted me to destroy you in front of everyone while Mingi literally had his hand on you.” 
“That´s not -” 
“Do I have to pretend I think you were squirming because of him and not me? I can play dumb if you´d like. I can even go call him back if you tell me you weren´t wishing it was my hand almost getting under your skirt instead of his. So, are you going to give in now or are we going to keep playing this game?” 
“Wooyoung-” 
“We´re best friends, I know. But I don´t see how you avoiding me because you get wet every time I´m around is doing our friendship any favors either.” 
Ok, he did make a pretty good case even though you were already convinced like an hour ago. 
“You´re right.” 
“I know.” 
“So?” 
“I´m not fucking you at Hongjoong´s.” 
You stared at him, completely dumbfounded – also not liking how the tables have turned one bit. Wooyoung in turn laughed and sent you another playful wink, “Trust me, you won´t want anyone around.” 
“It took a lot from me to come to terms with this, so we´re either doing it tonight or we´re not doing it.” 
“Oh, princess,” He gave you a condescending look that got you wanting to rip his hair out. “I find that hard to believe, but I appreciate the enthusiasm.” 
“Wooyoung-” 
“Y/n,” His voice was calm, hand finding its place on your thigh where Mingi´s was earlier, except this time the touch burned and got you fighting for your life not to squirm. “I said I´m not fucking you at Hongjoong´s, not that I´m not fucking you.” 
“Then let´s go.” 
“Now, that would be rude, wouldn´t it?” 
“Why are being like this?” You whined, about a second away from actually hitting the cockiness out of him.  
“You have this needy look in your eyes, like you´re ready to drop down and beg at any moment,” He smiled, his free hand gently tucking your hair behind your ear like he wasn´t talking about you on your knees. “It´s cute.” 
“You know what will be cute? When I ask Mingi to fuck me instead.” 
“If you can go to Hongjoong, in front of everyone, and tell him that we need to leave his birthday party right now because you can´t wait for me to fuck you, I´m good to go.” 
“Have you always been this annoying?” 
“Only when I know you´ll like it.” 
“You know you were the one asking to fuck me for weeks, right?” 
“I know.” 
“You just know everything, don´t you?” 
“See? You´re hot when you´re frustrated.” 
“You think I´m sexually frustrated but now I´m actually just mad at you.” He simply smiled at you in return, and you rolled your eyes once you realized where you had dug your grave, “I forgot you have a degradation kink or whatever. Can´t even be angry at you in peace anymore.” 
“If you´re really mad at me, we should fix that. I wouldn´t want my best friend to be angry at me.” 
“I don´t think it´s possible to fix it considering being annoying it´s like your whole personality. Point proven.” 
“Come say that closer,” He winked playfully, and you seriously would cringe at the number of times that man has winked at you if he wasn´t Wooyoung.  
Ok, coming completely clean: You were also kind of annoyed at the way you were definitely getting wet at the banter between the two of you, like teasing each other wasn´t what your whole friendship has been about for years. 
It also helped that Wooyoung´s hand was still on your thigh, veins sticking out and fingers filled with rings that you just couldn´t stop picturing against the skin on your neck.  
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. 
It took a second to decide if you would actually listen to that one braincell fighting for its life inside your head or not, but in the end, you decided against it, quickly standing up so you could sit on Wooyoung´s lap and take him by surprise as you straddled his thighs, one of your knees on each side of legs.  
Yeah, there was definitely something pulsing in between your legs. Fucking hell. 
You moved too quicky for Wooyoung to process what was going on, so it really was amusing the way he violently jerked once you moved your head closer, lips almost brushing his ears as you whispered, “What do you want me to say?” 
For a second you had almost forgotten it was Jung Wooyoung under you, but he was fast to remind you as one of his hands found its place on the side of your thigh and the other grabbed onto your waist, where his thumb brushed gentle circles against your exposed skin. He took advantage of the fact you were already bent down to say against your ear this time, “You never told me.” 
“What?” You asked, creating some distance between you so you could look at the smirk on his face and because you didn´t quite like the way you got weak when you felt his breath against your skin so closely. 
“The other day, we made a deal. You said you would tell me what you imagined me doing to you if I told you first, but you ran away after I completed my part. You owe me.” 
Under regular circumstances you would have stood up and left right then and there, but the way his palms met the front part of your thighs and started rubbing them up and down, a bit higher each time, got you wanting to play his game to see where it would end. 
“You´re right. That day was the first time I ever thought about you sexually, and you know what triggered it?” 
“What?” He smiled at the way goosebumps erupted all over your skin under his touches. 
“Your nose.” 
“So you like my nose?” 
“And your lips, but mostly your nose.” 
"And what about my lips and nose?" 
"Was just thinking about how good they'd feel under me," You look into his eyes, centimeters away from yours, thankful that Hongjoong had deemed the lights at some point of the night and now Wooyoung's face was illuminated only by a pink hue, coming from a fake sunset light your friend had bought on AliExpress. 
"That's good, ‘cause I've never wanted someone to sit on my face so bad before." 
“Careful,” You warned, inching your face closer to his, toying with the buttons on his shirt as your lips were almost brushing. “We still need to go back to being friends after we fuck and get this off our systems.” 
"I’m sure we can manage," He smiled, inching closer himself so now your lips were indeed touching as he continued speaking. "I'm a good friend after all." 
"Kiss me then, I dare you," You breathed out, shooting your last shot. 
He laughed at that, "You know I never back down from a challenge." 
But well, it worked. 
Wooyoung made his words true, grabbing onto your waist with a firmness that you didn't know he had to pull you closer. With your chests now glued, his lips finally pressed against yours and you hated yourself for not being disappointed. You so wanted the man to be all bark and no bite, but the moment his tongue met yours you understood why that girl wouldn't leave him alone. You had indeed kissed many people before, but it had never felt like this - and also, you were right, his plush lips were definitely something to obsess over. 
What didn't surprise you at all, was that like in everything else, Wooyoung was a tease. In some moments when you would deepen the kiss, he would pull back a bit and bite on your bottom lip just to laugh when you groaned in annoyance. When he felt you were getting frustrated at his little games, he would grab onto your hips and grind them against his – which well, definitely got your mind to stop thinking about how insufferable he was. Good thing you knew how to play too, hands finding the roots of his hair to pull harshly on it, almost passing out at the whine he let out.  
"I love that you're wearing a skirt," He groaned out. 
"Why is that?" You were so breathless you almost got embarrassed. 
"I can feel how wet you are." 
Fuck. 
"You must be imagining things." 
"Oh, am I?" The cunning smile he gave you along with those words should have prepared you. 
It really shouldn't have surprised you when one of his hands left your ass and snaked its way in between your bodies. You leaned back a little to try and understand what was happening, giving Wooyoung all the access he needed to get his hand under your skirt and press the pad of his middle finger right on your clit over your panties. 
"Told ya," He smirked in content at the way you gasped involuntarily.  
"Wooyoung-" 
"What? Weren't you the one who couldn't wait?" He teased, rubbing slow circles with his finger. "If you're already soaked like this, I can't even imagine what it would be like if I just pushed your panties to the side-" 
"No-" You whined, thorn between just letting him do whatever he wanted or stopping him - since you were very much in the middle of your friend's living room and there were people around. 
"Getting shy now?"  
“Wooyoung.” 
“That´s my name,” You could see in his eyes how much fun he was having teasing you. 
“You want me to stop teasing or stop touching you?” He mocked with a smile on his face, finger still working on you as you fought with all your life to not squirm on his lap. 
“You know what? If you want everyone to see, I can put on a show,” You sighed, accepting defeat. 
You expected Wooyoung to smirk once again but was instead surprised when he stopped and retreated his hand, adjusting your skirt back in place. Your heart dropped at the sight, searching for answers in his eyes, but they were busy looking somewhere else: Mingi had gotten back. You could see the way the tall man was frozen at the entrance, eyes wide and hand once again stuck in the air – this time holding his wallet proudly. 
You sent a glare at the intruder (as if there were not at least 10 other people in the room). The moment Mingi´s eyes caught yours, he jumped as if he had just woken up from a nap and he tried mouthing something like “sorry” and “oh shit” so you just rolled your eyes and motioned with your hand for him to move along, preferably far away. He seemed to get the message, almost tripping with how fast he spun on his heels and left.  
“What? Weren´t you the one who wanted everyone to know?” You asked Wooyoung, tone pointy as you climbed off his lap. It was like someone had thrown a bucket of cold water over you. THIS WAS JUNG WOOYOUNG. 
YOUR BEST FRIEND JUNG WOOYOUNG. 
THE GUY WHO MADE YOU DRESS LIKE A CHEERLEADER TO GO TO HIS COLLEGE SOCCER GAMES AND CHEER FOR HIM, THE GUY WHO BURPED AND LAUGHED AT HIS OWN DISGUSTINESS, THE GUY WHO DID A CRISTIANO RONALDO IMPRESSION EVERYTIME HE WON SOMETHING, THE GUY YOU HAD TO ONCE RESCUE FROM A PIG FARM AFTER DRINKING WAY TOO MUCH! 
“Yeah, but I guess my protective best friend side spoke louder,” He sighed too, fixing his pants. “Don´t be mad.” 
“I´m not mad.” 
“Yes, you are.” 
“Yes, I´m mad. Ok? Cause now the magic is over or whatever and I realized you´re my best friend and we can´t fuck.” 
He turned around on the couch to be able to look into your eyes, his searching. He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out, so he simply closed his eyes, sighed once again and stood up, offering his hand, “C´mon. Let me take you home.” 
“So, Mingyu huh?” Wooyoung asked, one hand on the wheel and the other on the gear.  
“Don´t do that.” 
“Do what?” 
“Ask about another man and pretend everything´s normal.” 
“Well, I guessed that now that we can´t fuck we can go back to being normal best friends.” 
You locked your jaw and crossed your arms. You were angry and you didn´t even know what for – But you expected Wooyoung to fix it, nonetheless. 
“Use your words.” 
“No.” 
“Ok, then. Silent ride it is.” 
You huffed; aware you were acting like a spoiled child, but you were just angry at the mess inside your head and that your friend was not able to read your mind and untangle everything so it made sense. Maybe you really were just spoiled and angry you didn´t get what you wanted when you wanted. 
“Oh. I get it now.” 
“What?” Wooyoung asked, eyes moving from the road for a second to look at you. 
“When you call me a brat. I get it now.” 
“I was searching my brain for plausible reasons for you to be all sulky, for you to admit you were mad just because I didn´t fuck you at the party?” 
“Yeah? Not just that, but you know I don´t like when things don´t go my way, I just wanted everything to happen fast so I wouldn´t have time to think about it but then when I thought about it, I felt bad because I still wanted it to happen but I know it shouldn´t.” 
“Y/N, it´s sex.” 
“Don´t make me sound stupid.” 
“I´m not, you´re just really overthinking this.” 
“Yeah, that´s the whole point. And it´s all your fault, so you see why I´m mad now?” 
“Yes. I´m the worst.” 
“You are.” 
“Not when I fuck you, thought.” 
“The moment has passed, Wooyoung. The train has left the station. Deal with it.” 
“If you say so. Are you opening the garage, or should I park outside?” 
“I didn´t bring the tag – Wait, are you going up?” 
“Street it is then.” 
“Answer me, stupid.” 
“Yes, I´m going up.” 
“What for?” 
“You said it yourself, if we´re best friends and nothing more is ever happening, there should be no problem with me sleeping over, right? We´ve done it thousands of times.” 
“Yeah,” You squeezed your eyes at him. You knew what game he was playing, trying to prove you wrong – But you were also convinced you were more stubborn than him and that you would instead prove him wrong. 
“Slumber party, fun!” He exclaimed, taking the key out and tapping your thigh before leaving his car. 
“Since this was kind of last minute,” You heard Wooyoung´s voice approaching your room, “I didn´t really bring any clothes.” 
And there he was, next to your bed in nothing but a towel around his hips, long messy hair slightly dripping down his torso and toothbrush in his mouth, looking all casual like you both knew he wasn´t doing this on purpose.  
The fact that it was working only made you even more annoyed. 
“You know where the drawer with your stuff is,” You groaned, pretending to look at your nails. 
He looked way too smug as he turned to your closet, opening said drawer to pull out some sweatpants. You kind of expected (or is it hoped the right word?) that he would just unknot the towel and expose himself to try and seduce you, but he behaved and simply pulled the pants under the fabric before unwrapping it.  
“Have you not heard about underwear?” 
“Have you not heard that it´s healthier to sleep without it? You should hang out with me more, I can teach you a lot.” 
“Yeah, I already see you enough, thanks.” 
“Come dry my hair.” 
“I think you´re perfectly capable of doing that yourself.” 
“Yeah, but I like when you do it.” 
You rolled your eyes and groaned, pushing the blanket out of you, “Fine.” 
Wooyoung walked to the bathroom in front of you, surely having planned the way his back and arms looked from behind. You had seen him without a shirt hundreds of times already, why did you feel like you wanted to jump him now?!!?!?!?  You figured you were over it after coming back to your senses but oh boy, were you wrong. 
“Has San been dragging you to the gym?” You asked as he bent over to get the hair dryer from the bottom drawer. You figured making small talk and acting normally would keep your brain busy. 
“Yeah. And you would know that if you opened the hundreds of snaps I send you every day.” 
“I´m not 14, Wooyoung. Snapchat died in 2015, sorry to inform you,” You joked as you plugged the dryer he handed you. “Give me the towel.” 
He did as told, sitting down on your toilet as you started drying the water excess from his hair. Doing your best so no part of your arm or leg would accidentally touch his skin since you could feel the heat emanating from it. 
That was no way of living. 
Once the towel was completely damp, you tossed it on the floor and grabbed a brush, ignoring how he closed his eyes in appreciation at the touch. You fucking hated him and the way your heart was beating fast for absolutely no reason.  
Now untangled, you reached over to get the hair dryer once again but were stopped with a soft touch to the side of your leg. 
You looked down at the man expecting an answer and he simply gave you a lazy smile, gently grabbing your wrist and pulling you in between his legs, “Come here. Let me look at you while you do it.” 
Well, you let him pull you along because there was nothing really sexual about it, Wooyoung was just a touchy person and he looked like he was about to fall asleep anyways.  
You turned on the dryer and used your fingers to move his hair around so the heat would get to his roots, feeling the skin of your face heat up at the way he hummed in content. Wooyoung had a lot of hair, and not just that, but he had a lot of thick hair, so you were already aware you would spend a long time in there, appreciating the silence and the fact he was pretty much out of it so you could let your guard down. 
WHICH IS EXACTLY WHY you jumped in surprise when both of his hands found their way to the side of your thighs, just very softly rubbing them up and down as you dried his strands, goosebumps erupting all over your body at the delicate touch.  
Once again, just sleepy touchy Wooyoung. 
Nothing new, nothing to fuss over. 
Except YOU WERE FUSSING OVER IT BECAUSE ONCE AGAIN YOU FELT A PULSE WHERE YOU DIDN´T WANT TO FEEL A PULSE. 
This whole situation was just so domestic and nice that it scratched a very specific part of your brain that got you wanting to live in that moment forever – except maybe not with your best FRIEND. 
“I like when you touch me,” His raw voice came out softly. “You don´t do it a lot, so I have to enjoy every chance I get.” 
You didn´t have an answer to that, the only thing you could think to say was “stop” but how could he stop when he wasn´t even doing anything to begin with? This time it was not his fault that your mind was in the gutter. 
“You have enough people touching you already,” You managed to string a few words. 
“Yeah, but it feels nicer when it´s you,” He opened his eyes, you could see the sincerity in them and you felt bad that you kind of just wanted to punch him and run away. 
You were also surprised by the sudden unexpected eye contact, which explains why you accidentally pulled one of his strands a bit harshly. WHAT WASN´T EXPLAINED THOUGH, WAS THE LOW MOAN HE LET OUT AND THE WAY HIS EYES CLOSED AS HIS MOUTH PARTED. OR THE WAY YOURS HUNG OPEN TOO AT THE SOUND OR THE WAY YOU COULDN´T STOP STARING AT THE STUPID MOLE ON HIS LIP. 
It was a moment of insanity, a few seconds when your soul was out of your body; when you tentatively pulled on his hair again, feeling his nails digging into the skin of your thighs and his breathing getting heavier, yours matching. 
“If you really don´t want us to fuck then you´re just being cruel right now,” He breathed out, eyes still closed as his forehead met your abdomen.  
“I don´t?” 
“Is that a question?” 
“No. I don´t. I think your hair is dry.” 
“It´s definitely not,” He argued, raising his head once again. “C´mon, finish it. No funny business, I promise.” 
You wanted to tell him it´s not him you were worried about, it’s the way your own body was betraying you that bothered you, but you took a deep breath and continued with the work, doing your best to ignore his eyes on you or how his hands were once again toying with your thighs or how his thighs were touching your legs or how he was centimeters away from you. 
Yeah, a lot of things to ignore. 
Was your bathroom always this small? 
“You smell nice.” 
“I shower once in a while,” You agreed. “And you said no funny business.” 
“I´m complimenting you, how is that sexual?” 
“It´s not,” You agreed. 
He smirked at you because he too was well aware of the tension, if the way his sweatpants were suddenly tight were anything to go by. Thankfully he didn´t answer because you don´t think you could continue to ignore it if he mentioned he was getting hard just by you drying his hair. 
Eventually, after what felt like days, you finally turned off the dryer and prayed he would agree to your suggestion, “You´re done. Wanna sleep?” 
“Nop, this is a slumber party.” 
“What? You want to have a pillow fight now or do facemasks and gossip?” You rolled your eyes. 
“Although the first option sounds fun, I was thinking we can watch something until we fall asleep.” 
Watch something. 
Until you fell asleep. 
In your bed. 
Sure, what could go wrong? 
“What are you doing?” Wooyoung asked amusedly. 
“Building a barrier between our sides of the bed.” 
He laughed loudly at that, crawling into the bed too and taking the pillows from where you were organizing them, “Wooyoung!” 
“Shut up, you enjoyed cuddling once and you will enjoy it again.” 
“Absolutely not.” 
“What? Afraid you won´t be able to resist me? I thought we were just friends,” He teased. 
“Very funny-“ 
“Because if you´re interested we can just skip the foreplay and go straight to –“ 
“What do you want to watch?” 
You ignored his low chuckle, giving up on fighting for the pillows and getting comfortable on your bed so you could turn on the TV. 
“Community?” 
“Great,” You agreed between gritted teeth, opening the Netflix app and putting on the show from where you two had stopped it as Wooyoung fluffed the pillows behind his back next to you.  
This time he didn´t even ask before pulling you in between his legs, your back against his chest. You didn´t even fight it because honestly, what for? You simply groaned as you felt him searching for the light switch on the wall over your bed.  
“Don´t pretend you don´t enjoy it, I´ve got you all figured out now.” 
“Yeah yeah, believe what you want to.” 
“Shut up, I´m trying to watch the show.” 
You huffed, rolled your eyes and crossed your arms all at the same time. You knew it wasn´t at him you were annoyed – although he was sure making a great job at feeding into it.  
You also immediately regretted wearing shorts as the palms of his hands splayed over your thighs.  
“It´s too hot,” You complained, hoping he would let you go. 
Wooyoung simply stretched out one of his hands and grabbed the AC remote, turning it on before tossing it away and returning his palm to your thigh. His silence told you he was focused on the show and you truly wish you could say the same about yourself, but instead, your eyes were glued to the sight in front of you like it was a car wreck, not being able to look away no matter how much your brain ordered you to. Your knees were bent, your thighs almost touching your chest, so his hands were just right there in your line of sight, all veiny and calloused.  
The harder you tried to stir your mind away and pay attention to the TV, the more your brain looked like a Wattpad fanfic written by a 40-year-old who just got divorced and discovered sex wasn't just missionary. The conversation you had with Wooyoung about how the girls he fucked became literally obsessed with him kept flashing into your head and you were legitimately about to bite onto your fist and scream for 7 whole minutes.   
Your mental breakdown however was interrupted by the man behind you, who with no words started tracing his fingers – seemingly – unpresumptuously over your skin. You ignored it because you had no energy to fight it and as long as it stayed PG-rated it would be fine.  
The soft touches plus the very cold wind from the AC hitting you got goosebumps to erupt up your skin and you just felt how your nipples were suddenly sensitive against the fabric of your shirt and Wooyoung´s hand were just there, mere centimeters away and oh, you so desperately wanted him to touch them. In fact, you wanted it so badly you were fighting for your life to keep the uncomfortable squirming to a minimum.  
Thankfully, Wooyoung didn´t notice it – deep down you knew he was just pretending not to for your sake, but if he could, so would you.  
“Who do you think is hotter, Annie or Britta?” His voice suddenly, almost against your ear, shocked you. “Oh, jumpy, are we?” 
“Shut up, I was just startled.” 
“So?” 
“Britta.” 
“Same.” 
He went quiet once again, except now, when you thought his mind was once again focused on the show, his hands started getting braver. They escalated from just his fingers drawing shapes on the patch above your knees to suddenly coming down to the sensitive skin between your thighs. You jerked involuntarily even though he only traced his fingers about halfway down your legs. Wooyoung once again pretended to not notice your reaction and you pretended to not notice he was touching you.  
His fingers gently brushing the sides of your thighs all the way to your knees before you could feel the tip of his middle finger slowly grazing your skin down the inside of your thighs, lower and lower each time he came down. At this point your heart was beating so fast it was almost coming out of your throat, your breathing labored and sweat building up on your forehead even though the room was freezing cold.  
“She´s kind of annoying, though.” 
“Who?” You breathed out, honestly not even knowing your name anymore. 
“Britta.” 
“Oh, yeah.” 
Silence once again.  
Attention back to the show. 
You had to control your whine of disappointment when he retreated his hands.  
Ok, you took the chance to breathe, count to 10 and give yourself a pep talk. You could do this. You would not fuck your best friend. If not because of your morals and because of your friendship, because fucking him would mean he won, and you would never give Wooyoung the satisfaction. 
Ok, you could do this. 
You could definitely do this. 
Wooyoung gently gathered your hair and pushed it over your right shoulder, the familiar goosebumps showing up once again at the way the tip of his fingers brushed against the skin of your neck.  
Yeah, you could not do this.  
The sound that came out of your mouth when his wet lips met the juncture between your neck and shoulder could only be described as a pinscher finding out it could bark. You were in fact shaking as much as those annoying tiny dogs are known for. 
You froze, not being able to react when you felt him sucking on your skin or when his tongue tried to soothe the pain his teeth left behind. Your core was clenching so hard it hurt. 
“Wooyoung,” Your voice came out as half plead half warning.  
“Hm?” He hummed against a different spot on your neck, and it made it a thousand times worse.  
 “We shouldn´t-” 
“Just tell me to stop and I will.” 
Except you couldn´t. Not when he found your sweet spot and grazed his teeth against it before gently sucking on it. This time you allowed yourself to squirm and you felt it at the same time you heard it; Wooyoung groaned as you accidentally pressed against him and figured out you were not the only one going insane. His dick was hard and now very much pulsing against your ass and lower back.  
Both of you realized you never told him to stop and you were fighting so hard to gain control of your body back as he kissed the vein on your neck - but it was all lost when his hands snaked around your torso and grabbed your boobs. You whimpered, shamefully, squeezing your legs together to try and relieve some of the throbbing.  
His kisses grew harsher, as he sucked one spot hard enough to leave a mark, the pad of his middle fingers toyed with your nipples and you simply couldn't pretend you didn´t want this to happen anymore, not with the way you could literally start dripping onto your bed any moment now.  
A gasp left your lips when his right hand grabbed onto your thigh and pulled your legs open. You felt his dick twitching when he saw the wet patch in the middle of your shorts. 
“Oh, princess,” He sighed, pressing against the stain in pure admiration. 
“Wooyoung-” 
“Tell me to stop.” 
He gave you no time to consider his words, pulling the bottom of your shorts and panties to the side and rubbing his middle finger down your slit to wet it. You carved your nails onto his thighs in return, doing your best to stay grounded. It didn´t even take a minute for you to understand why the prior girls who slept with Wooyoung became obsessed with him, you weren´t really doing anything yet and the second the pad of his finger found your clit while his other hand gently pressed down onto your lower stomach everything became even clearer. You threw your head back on his shoulder in pleasure as he rubbed figure eights against your clit. 
Yeah, you agreed to pretend nothing happened starting tomorrow, but you figured you would never be able to forget the sound of your best friend´s deep moan against your ear when he felt you around his finger for the first time. 
“Glad to see I´m not the only one going crazy,” He groaned against your ear - and when did his voice get so raspy? 
You whined once again, not really knowing what else to do when you were practically on the edge from a minute or two of stimulation. 
“Tell me to stop.” 
“Wooyoung-” 
“I love when you say my name.” 
Were you about to cry? 
At this point, you just wanted him to ignore you and throw you around and do whatever he wanted, but you knew he wouldn´t until you said so, and you were definitely not doing that. Although with every second that passed with his finger on you, that definitely was turning more into a probably.  
“I never told you.” 
“Wha- What?” 
“From all the ways I imagined this happening, I never told you my favorite.” 
“What is it?” 
“It´s the one where we´re in a sleepover and you´re so desperate that you can´t even go to the bathroom, so you just very quietly put your hands inside your shorts and touch yourself right next to me thinking that I´m asleep. And I pretend I am, but I can hear the small whimpers you try to hold back, I can feel the slight shake of the bed and I can hear how wet you are so clearly. Sometimes, I even imagine you would decide to use me, not even try to wake me up, just sit on my face and ride it until I pretend to wake up and finally eat you out until you´re crying and shaking.” 
When you literally had to hold yourself back from finishing at his words, you grabbed his hand and turned around on your knees, smashing your lips with no fanciness against his. He was quick to grab your ass and direct you to sit on top of his legs, your thighs on either side of his in the familiar position as your tongues met and you pulled the hairs on the back of his neck with all the frustration you had inside you. 
“We´re not fucking,” You informed in between labored breaths. 
“We don´t have to fuck, I just need you to sit on my face.” 
You never whined so loudly in your life before. 
That was the one single thing you have been dreaming about hearing for weeks now and you were so happy you could practically cry, in fact, you almost came right there without even being touched. 
I´ll be posting part 2 this week because this was already too long and crashing my terrible terrible computer <3
I´ll be proof reading this some other day sorry for any mistakes I´m just a dyslexic girl with adhd and no english lessons ever
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eufezco · 20 days
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NEED TO LET LOGAN 2017 SLEEP WITH HIS 100LB HEAD ON MY TITTIES AND STROKE HIS STUPID BEARD AND WASH HIS HAIR AFTER A LONG ROUGH DAY AUGHHH
it was getting late and you were still waiting for logan to get home from work. caliban had been keeping you company, chatting with you, and serving you a cup of hot milk but eventually, the mutant went to bed and it was just you.
logan got home that night with his white shirt soaked in blood. you stood up terrified and spilling your milk once you saw him with his head down and dragging his feet inside the house. and now you were in the bathroom, hugging him from behind and with your head resting against his back as he grunted and pushed the bullets out of his chest. he held his body with both hands on the sink, slightly leaning forward.
the muscles in his body tensed every time he pushed and you closed your eyes hard. it hurt you to see how he suffered, how his body no longer helped him. you mumbled sweet things against the skin of his back. well done, baby, good job every time he managed to push another bullet out of his body, i love you, you almost got it while he panted and gathered the strength to push again.
when logan pushed out the last bullet, you stayed in that position for a few minutes, you hugging him from behind and him feeling completely exhausted.
—let me see —. you gently grabbed his shoulders and turned him around. —shit, logan. what happened? —. the bullet wounds were deep, you wouldn't know how long it would take for his body to heal or if it would even heal at all. he didn't answer your question, logan just pressed his forehead against yours. —you're okay, baby, you're home now. —you cupped one of his cheeks. then, you grabbed his shaky hands and kissed his knuckles.
you took out a needle and thread from the first aid kit. you would rather do it yourself than have logan spend all night writhing in pain while waiting for his body to do the job. he hissed every time the needle went through his skin and you apologized. you did not ask any more questions about the shot wounds, you knew he would tell you in the morning when he had had some rest.
you undid his belt and unbuttoned his pants. you pulled down his underwear and then helped him to get into the bathtub. logan hissed again when the water hit his freshly stitched wounds but also felt how all the muscles in his body relaxed.
you washed his body, being very careful every time you got close to one of his wounds. his chest was covered in blood which made you nervously swallow before washing it with the soap. that much blood... if it wasn't for his mutation he'd be dead now, he would not even have had time to come back home to you. your heart felt heavy inside your chest just at the thought of it. then, you asked him to sit on the floor of the bathtub and you knelt to wash his hair. your hands massaged his scalp and he closed his eyes, enjoying your touch.
he got out of the shower and you threw the towel over his shoulders. —wait here, i'll bring you clean clothes.
after helping him to get dressed, you went to your room. logan laid down on the bed, grunting as his body touched the mattress from how much everything hurt. you laid next to him and lifted one of your arms so he could rest his head on your chest. your fingers played with his gray hair. he closed his eyes and let all the air out of his lungs
—'m sorry, should've asked before, how was your day? —he said with raspy voice.
you hummed, playing it down. he came home shot in the chest and he was still apologizing for not having cared about you sooner. —it was okay. i came from work and spent some time with charles. he keeps saying that he feels a new mutant, a young one.
logan shook his head. —that old man has lost his mind.
—but what if he's right? would that be so strange?
—and now he has made you lose your mind too.
you giggled.
he suddenly lifted his head from your chest. your hands still played with his hair as you looked back into his eyes. —did you eat? —he asked, worried.
you nodded, showing him a little smile as you caressed the side of his face. —caliban made dinner, he left you some in the fridge. —logan shook his head, he was too tired to eat anything. —he waited with me for a bit for you to come but he ended up going to bed.
he slowly nodded. your hands now caressed the beard that covered his cheeks. he didn't know how you could keep the sparkle in your eyes when you looked at him. this is not the life he had promised you, this was not the life he wanted for you. but you still waited for him at night so you could spend some time together, you kept kissing him the same way, touching him the same way. stitching his wounds even though you didn't have to, calling him during his breaks to make sure he had eaten what you prepared for him.
you caressed his cheek tenderly and gave him a quick kiss on the lips. he rested his head on your chest again.
—i don't know what i would do without you.
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pupkashi · 2 months
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satoru loves you & he’s tired of being your friend
a/n: loosely inspired by taehyungs song fri(end)s i hope u guys like pls lmk what yall think plsplsplspls
word count - 1,764
masterlist
the only light illuminating your living room was from your tv as it played your favorite comfort movie, one you’d seen countless times before. the familiarity of it had you dozing off on your couch, in and out of sleep as you lost the battle with your heavy eyelids.
there’s a soft knock on your door that has you jumping out of your skin, heart racing loudly in your ears. you pause the movie, wondering if maybe you’d hallucinated it and it truly was time for you to go to bed.
knock, knock, knock
your palms are sweaty, checking your phone before standing up. there’d been no missed texts or calls from anyone you knew, who the fuck knocks on a door at 3:24 in the morning?
you grab the baseball bat by the door, peeking through the peephole and being met with tousled white locks. a color of hair you’d be able to spot a mile away, one you’d grown to care for.
“what are you doing at my door at four in the fucking morning?” you whisper-yelled, setting the bat down and opening the door wider to let the man in. he gives you a small smile, one hand pushing his hair back and out of his face and the other holding his side.
“sorry sweet cheeks, didn’t wanna go home just yet” he mumbles, stepping in and standing by the doorway, waiting for your instruction.
“d’you get hurt? are you bleeding?” the annoyance in your voice is gone, and it makes satoru relax. he gives you a small nod, shrugging his shoulders and trying to play it off.
“nothing that won’t be healed by mornin’” you roll your eyes at him, muttering a small ‘come on’ and walking to the bathroom down the hall. “i miss you y’know” satoru says softly, watching as you searched for the first aid kit under the sink, grabbing the box and making him sit on the toilet lid.
“did you really?” you scoff, not meeting his gaze as you grab a soft rag, running it under warm water. satoru furrows his brows, confused as to why you think he wouldn’t have missed you.
“‘course i did,” he replies, opening his mouth to continue but closing it quickly when you turn to face him.
“can i take your blindfold off” you ask, your hands fiddling with the damp rag before setting it down when he nods ‘yes.’ you find the small knot hiding in his hair, gently undoing it.
the black blindfold loosen instantly, and you’re quick to gently take it off his head, setting it on the counter. his hair flops onto his forehead, falling almost perfectly to frame his face. despite the countless times you’d seen his eyes, your breath still hitched in your throat when you looked into them.
you try not to stare too long, brushing his hair out of his face and cleaning the dried blood on his face. satoru doesn’t take his eyes off you, eyes tracing your every feature. his gaze is one you always faltered under, growing nervous when he’d stare at you for too long.
“what” you ask, a small nervous smile forming on your face. satoru shakes his head, a small upside down smile on his face as you wipe the cut on his cheeks with an alcohol wipe.
“you’re just real pretty” he says, watching as you bite your bottom lip, surely trying to stop the smile fighting its way into your face.
“is you side hurt too?” you motion to where his hand is covering, trying to brush past the compliment he’d given you.
“healed it up a good amount while you were cleaning me up” he shrugs, lifting his shirt and showing you the brand new scar, “I’m not completely helpless.”
“no you’re the strongest” you tease, throwing away the used items and washing your hands. “did you wanna shower? you look like you could use it” satoru pouts at your words.
“don’t have to be so mean about it” you laugh softly, drying your hands before you’re standing in front of him again. you let your hands brush through his hair, exposing his forehead before you press a kiss to the skin.
“sorry angel, you’re the one who woke me up” satoru lets his eyes close softly, heart sinking a bit when you pull away from him.
“I’ve got some clothes you’ve left over so I’ll leave ‘em on the counter” you smile, closing the door behind you and sighing softly.
how’d you get to this point? how’re you stuck between friends and something more?
friends don’t feel the way you do about satoru. friends don’t place feathery kisses on their friends scars. friends don’t act the way you two act.
satoru steps out of the shower, smiling when he realizes his clothes smell like you. his heart leaps when he exits the restroom, finding you still awake and waiting for him on the couch.
“waiting for someone?” his voice makes you jump a bit, shaking you head and watching as he sits next to you. “did you have plans for tomorrow?” he questions, watching as you send a text.
“told them something came up,” you shrug, “figured you need me more.”
the words tugged on satoru’s heartstrings. there was a never night you hadn’t been there when he needed you. you’d been there for him since the day you’d met him, there to comfort him and ease his racing mind. you were there to calm him from panic attacks and frustrations, help him through grief and stress. everything.
you were a great friend.
he hated that word. you weren’t his friend, you were something more. he knew how he felt about you, he had an inkling feeling you felt the same. so what’s stopping him?
satoru shakes the question out of his head, focusing instead on the tv. the end credits are rolling but you’re not looking away, eyes unfocused and your mind elsewhere.
“should we go to sleep?” satoru whispers, a feathery touch to snap you back to reality. you nod with a small smile, the two of you making the familiar walk to your bedroom, satoru turning off any lights and closing the bedroom door behind him before slipping in next to you.
you’d always liked having your head on his chest, you were able to hear his heartbeat this way. the rhythmic pitter-patter never failed to make you smile or help you relax. it also gave away anytime he was nervous.
“your hearts beating real fast” you state, not looking up, instead continuing to draw circles in the palm of his hand. “what are you thinking about?”
there’s too many thoughts in satoru’s head, so many that he can’t begin to process a single one of them. so instead he blurts out what had been on his mind all night.
“i love you.”
you never thought people were telling the truth about time stopping when something like this happened. you’d always figured they romanticized their life a little too much.
but you felt time stop.
your fingers faltered and you felt your breathing hitch in your throat. your stomach erupted in butterflies, face hot and your eyes wide as the three words landed on your ears.
there was a million thoughts in your head, memories flooding in. spring nights around a fire pit, hot summer days at the beach, cool autumn afternoons carving pumpkins and cold winter mornings drinking hot chocolate. and in every one of them you bit back three words while staring at the white haired man.
“you don’t have to say it back” satoru begins, his heart beating even faster than before, “i just- I’ve been think-” you sit up quickly and cut him off, shaking your head and finally looking him in the eyes.
“I love you too,” you smile, letting yourself enjoy the the moment of euphoria the two of you felt upon hearing the other say the three words you’d dreamt of.
there’s only a second of silence before satoru’s blue eyes are looking at your lips, flickering up to meet your eyes momentarily. all it takes is you leaning in ever so slightly.
his hands are cupping your cheeks, crashing his lips against yours, a sense of urgency as his lips move against yours. he tastes like his vanilla lip balm and toothpaste, smiling as the words replay in your head.
“what’s funny?” he mumbles against your lips, laughing softly, not bothering to pull away from your lips. satoru’s cerulean eyes are fluttering open, completely focused on you.
you pull away a couple inches, staring into his eyes, you can see the emotions swimming in his eyes, love and excitement written over his face as he takes in your beauty.
“just happy” you reply, “never thought you’d put the end in friends” satoru pouts comically at your words, shoving his face in your lap and groaning softly.
“‘m sorry” he grumbles, “new to all the relationship stuff” there’s genuine frustration and remorse in his voice, it makes you smile as your run your fingers through his hair, tugging softy.
“‘s okay” you say, “thought technically I’m not yours since you haven’t asked me” he knows you’re poking fun at him, not rushing him into anything.
“don’t worry,” he says, sitting up and adjusting himself to lay down next to you, smiling when you lay your head on his chest, “gonna make you mine as soon as i can.”
the words make your heart flutter again, a sheepish smile on your face as your cheeks and ears burn.
“alright smooth talker let’s get some sleep.”
funny enough satoru feels the weight on his shoulders grow lighter with your body weight pressed against him. he feels a sense of serenity running his fingers up and down your exposed skin.
you can see goosebumps rise where your fingertips touch, smiling softly and holding back a giggle as your fingers ghost over his abs, causing him to shiver.
it’s different from before, more intimate.
satoru wonders why he was so afraid of baring his heart to you in the first place. he can’t find an excuse as he watches the golden ray of sunshine hit your face softly, causing you to stir. he’s still as he watches you immediately nuzzle your face into his side, falling back into a deep sleep in his arms.
it doesn’t take long for him to fall asleep too, a smile on his face when he feels your grip tighten.
lovers, he thinks, it has a nice ring to it.
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dinogoofymutated · 5 months
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Hey not sure if your currently taking requests but I just wanted to I soooooo stoked that you write for Remy! I've been starved for years cuz there's like no fan fics for him😭.
anyway I was wondering if you could do like a fic or headcannon where gambit somehow got hurt on a mission and is on bed rest but is also like really horny because you wont have sex with his since hes hurt.
If not that's fine I just thought it up and thought it would be hilarious 😂. Anyway luv your work, keep it up😘
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NSFW!Gambit/AFAB!Reader
MMMMMHHHMMMMMM BESTIE UR MIND. ABSOLUTE GENIUS. I hope that you don't mind I did make it NSFW there at the end but the majority is just teasing our favorite gambler. Also, This is for the folks who were also really attracted to that one scene in criminal minds with the bulletproof vest. iykyk.
TWs: teasing, sexual innuendos, explicit smut, Handjobs, Mutual masturbation, PNV sex. Raw sex. (Wrap it bf you tap it yall) Creampie. Reader written with Fem! pronouns.
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"Asolutetly not." You're quick to say it. Gambit pouts as the words leave your mouth, still on the infirmary bed with all the wires and doodads still hooked up to him. He's giving you those scoundrel puppy eyes that he knows you usually give in to, but you're not willing to budge this time.
"No, Remy. I will not be-" You take a quick glance around the room, leaning in a little closer as you begin to whisper-yell at him. "-I will not be having sex with you right now!" Remy sighs in a pitiful way leaning against the headboard in your direction. You can’t begin to look him in the eyes right now, instead lightly pushing his face away from your spot, sitting close to his bed on a chair that you had moved from the corner. His pout turns into an amused smile, as he instead takes your hand in his own, moving it down to press a kiss to your palm. You try not to blush at him. You’re supposed to be standing strong, dammit! 
  "Come on, Chère. S' not like it's gonna make Gambit hurt any worse-” You cut him off by lightly slapping his abdomen. Remy immediately flinches, curling in on himself with a pained groan. You feel a little guilty afterward, flattening your palm to rub the area soothingly.
    “Yes, it would. Remy, I could seriously hurt you. You heard beast, any vigorous activity could rip your stitches.” You say, moving to where you can sit on the bed, facing him. You cup the side of his face, gently moving stray locks out of the way. He rolls his eyes, not at you, but at the memory of the talking-to he got when he had woken up in the infirmary. 
    “Never stopped me before. Since I been with the X-men it’s like everythin’ become a big deal. So what if I rip a few stitches here an’ there?” Remy grumbles. You give him a stern look, before leaning in to kiss his temple. He melts into your touch.
    “It is a big deal, Remy. You need to heal. End of discussion.” You say gently. Remy thinks on it for a moment, before giving you a slight smirk. 
    “And by “end of discussion” you really mean “Until Gambit tempts me into bed”, Right?” He says. You roll your eyes at him before standing. If that’s the attitude he’s going into these next weeks with, you know for a fact he’s going to be insufferable.
    You were right. The incoming weeks were almost as much torture to you as they most definitely were to him. Wherever you went in the mansion, Gambit was sure to follow. He’d be in the kitchen while you would be cooking, unable to help due to doctor's orders, but no one ever said that he had to stay out of the kitchen. He’s come up behind you, snaking his arms around your hips as he’d “Give you pointers”. He’d lean close and whisper in your ear, sometimes giving it a nip or two. But one thing about Gambit is that every time you turned him away, or laughed at him and told him to sit down, he’d get pouty. 
    That was a trend that continued. He’d deliberately go out of his way to tease you, on movie night, in the library, in the showers even. And every time, despite how hot under the collar you might have been, you turned him away. The more bothered you seemed to be however, his pouts turned into smirks. Eventually, you got fed up with it. You were trying to be a good girlfriend and make sure Remy didn’t hurt himself, but if he was going to be a brat about it, you could be a brat too.
    You started off a little more subtly than Remy did. Lingering touches here and there, kissing him just long enough to leave him wanting. You’d wear just a tad less clothing around him, or wear slightly lower-cut tops. You were beginning to realize just how easy it was to get him riled up.
    One particular day, the tension was thick in the air, having coalesced into something barely breathable. Remy was lying back on the bed on his elbows as you redressed his wound, making sure to spread ointment onto the healing stitches and care for the skin. You frequently found yourself drawn to the sight of his lower abs, the large bruise having begun to yellow as it healed. Maybe it was the fact that you hadn't seen his skin in a while, but the sight of him had you breathing a little funny. Remy was also a little quieter than normal, unable to look away from your gentle hands as you took care of him.
    Once you finished, you lingered by his side, a hand pressed against his chest. You look up to find him already watching you, but neither of you says anything. You purse your lips, debating on whether or not you’re doing what you think you’re about to do. Remy tilts his head at you questioningly. He opens his mouth to speak but fails to do so as your hand trails down to his waistband. He takes a shocked breath through his nose, his eyes fluttering shut for a moment before he’s looking at you again through a lustful haze. 
    “Thought you said-”
    “Shut up.” You sigh, cutting him off. Remy smirks at you, biting his lip. You roll your eyes, caressing the crotch of his pants a few times before you begin to slip them off of him.
    “Don’t get too excited.” You whisper, but really it sounds more like a needy sigh. “Just a handy, okay?” Gambit huffs a laugh at you, but doesn’t tease. He's practically bucking his hips into your hand when you finally take hold of his cock, stroking him to hardness. You can’t seem to look away from the sight, watching as his abdomen clenches with every stroke from base to tip. You twist your hand on the upstroke, listening as Remy lets out a curse and a sudden moan just as you thumb his head, collecting his abundant precum as you use it to stroke back down again. 
    “You’re really pent up, huh?” You ask in a heated whisper. Remy’s head is tilted back in pleasure, and he huffs in amusement as he cracks an eye open at you. His hand slides up your thigh, Your legs being pressed against each other tightly to find some friction. You gasp as he suddenly slides two of his fingers up the inside seam of your pants, and you can practically feel yourself get wetter at the touch. 
    “Looks like I’m not the only one.” Remy hums. You can’t seem to pull away from him as he continues to stroke you. The air is hardly breathable, and the burning in your chest and your core starts to become too hot to ignore. 
    “Fuck it.” You say. Remy is confused when you let go of him, only to break into a wide smile when he realizes you were beginning to strip. The shirt is first to go, before your bra, and then your jeans and underwear. Remy wolf-whistles at the sight, and you wave him off, embarrassed. 
    “Couldn’t stay away from the temptation of Remy LeBeau, Now could you Chère?” Remy muses. He’s such a goof. You try to hide your smile as you carefully straddle his legs, making sure to avoid his sore spots. One of his hands holds onto your upper thigh, the other making its way to your center. He strokes you languidly with his fingers before circling your slit and pushing two inside. You suck in a breath, careful to set your hands on his shoulders without putting any weight onto them. 
    “Looks like this pretty pussy missed me as much as I missed you,” Remy says breathlessly. His eyes flicker from your cunt up to your bare breasts, and then to your flushed face. You feel like you’re falling apart too quickly, already climbing that high as he fingers you with those hands you love so much.
    “Remy,” You call for him breathlessly. “ m’ not gonna last too long.” Remy can't help himself any longer, and pulls you closer to catch you in a passionate kiss. He drags his teeth across your bottom lip, letting go of the plush skin. He doesn't withdraw his fingers until your thighs begin to shake and you start to clench down on him. You whine as he does so, barely holding your composure. Remy takes your hand off of his cock, pressing a kiss to your knuckles before gently dragging your hips further into his lap. Your mind is hazy, but you know to be careful as he lines himself up.
    “If we're going to do this, we're taking it my speed, okay?” You say. Remy nods, barely taking in the information. He was ready to be inside you. After weeks of nothing- all he could think about was you. Your giggles, your smiles. Your body. The way you taste on his tongue. The feeling of your thighs clenching around his head.  Remy would do anything you asked of him at this moment.
    You take it slow as you lower yourself down on his cock. The stretch of him feels delicious against your inner walls. Remy leans in, kissing and sucking on your breasts as you take your time. He bottoms out with a wet sound, his hands resting against your upper thighs.
    Remy curses as you begin to move, bouncing on his cock somewhat slowly. Even in the haze of your lust, you're worried about hurting him. Remy, on the other hand, doesn't share the same sentiment. His hands clench around your thighs, and when he can't seem to take the slow speed anymore, he slams you down onto him.
    You gasp at the action, and apologies spill from his lips as he tilts you forward, knocking your balance so you're forced to lean onto him as he controls the pace, eagerly thrusting into your heat. 
    “Remy-” Your protests are cut off with a kiss as your favorite scoundrel begins to take exactly what he wants. His grunts and moans beneath you send another trickle of warmth inside of you. To be honest, seeing him take control like this was hot- almost hot enough for you to forgive the fact that he was certainly overexerting himself- but it was hard to be mad at him when he's fucking you so good.
    One thing about Remy is that he's a talker in bed. If anything, you were surprised he was as “quiet” as he had been the majority of the time. But once he started to get closer to his peak, Remy began to ramble. 
    "You think you're smart? -Ah! Teasing me like that.. mmh… expecting me to just take it?" You're not really paying attention to his words, nodding in response while only thinking about his steady grip on your thighs and ass and the peak you're reaching so quickly. Remy squeezes you harder, almost harshly as he begins to take you faster. His hips begin to stutter, thrusts starting to do him in one by one. 
    Remy lets out a loud groan as he reaches his peak, burying himself deeply inside you and thumbing your clit. He continues to thrust as he helps you reach that white-hot peak of pleasure, pressing kisses to your temple as you ride it out on top of him. By the time you're both fully finished, you're panting for air. You're fully collapsed onto Remy's chest, Remy being absolutely boneless as he rests against the headboard. 
    “You’re such an idiot.” You say when you finally have enough sense. Remy just chuckles, continuing to press kisses to every part of your face and neck he can reach. You sigh happily as he does so, pressing some of your own kisses to his shoulder.
    When you finally peel yourself off of his chest, the first thing you check in on is his bandages. You scowl when you see that they've been soaked through with sweat, but more concerning is the spot of red that has started to form. You look up at Remy with narrowed eyes, and he quickly looks down as well, before looking back up at you and simply shrugging with a gleeful smile.
    “Casualty of love, Chère.”
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