#shelby stop ranting

[midnighticee]

SO! It took way longer than I thought it would, but after several weeks I finally finished my first ever pillow! The absolutely incredible art on the front is from 2 Arms Left by @intotheelliwoods ! The back is a last minute plan to add a lil mask that uh. I'm definitely going to practice before I attempt again lmao

[runnning-outof-time]

Congrats again my love!! How about Tommy and 22? Maybe some smut? Maybe some angst? I can’t wait to read what you will come up with 🤍

Thanks so much for sending this in, Chi! I didn’t go full on smut here because I can’t write it for the life me, and the angst wasn’t the main element, but this idea came to me after re-watching this episode and I ran with it. I hope I did your request justice! Enjoy! :)

PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!

Part of my 3.5k celebration — check out others!

A Long Day

Tommy Shelby x Reader

Warnings: language, mentions of blood/injury, suggestive situations (nothing too graphic)

Word Count: 1223

Summary: After a long day, Tommy just wants to be with (Y/N). (Y/N), who’s not seen him for the entire day, has some words to say to him first.

Tommy had had a long day. After handing money to the family of the boy who shouldn’t have died, meeting with Campbell and dealing with all that entailed, making sure his derby horse was transferred to its trainer, and Michael coming to make a pitch to be considered for the spot of company accountant, he wanted nothing more now than to get his mind off of all of it.

After telling Michael that he’d need to speak with his mother about the position first, Tommy was finally heading home. The door to 6 Watery Lane couldn’t come fast enough, but when it did, he stopped to take a deep breath before opening it. He hoped there wouldn’t be another item of business waiting behind it.

(Y/N) had been sitting in the front room of the house on Watery Lane for a few hours now. She’d been waiting for Tommy, who promised her he’d meet her and that they’d go somewhere for dinner.

Her eyes snapped to the door the second she heard it open, and she was up from the couch and walking over to Tommy as soon as she saw that it was him. “Where’ve you been, Tommy?” she questioned, trying to keep her emotions in check.

“Love…” Tommy sighed, his gaze finding the far wall as she came to stop in front of him. This already seemed like it was shaping up to be another item of business.

“You said you’d meet me for dinner three hours ago. Three, Tommy! And I’ve been sitting here, worried sick about where you could be and what you could be doing. I talked to Pol, you know. She said that you…”

(Y/N) was unable to finish her worry-driven rant because Tommy had reached out and took hold of her cheeks, effortlessly bringing her lips to his in a fervent kiss, one that was effective in derailing her train of thought. The kiss lasted until her lungs were screaming for air, making her be the one to pull back; her forehead resting against his.

“Where were you, Tommy?” she asked in a breathless manner a few moments after they’d parted.

“I’ve had a long fucking day,” he responded, his statement not answering hers in the slightest. (Y/N) exhaled a sigh, her nonverbal way of telling him that his answer wasn’t good enough. He distracted her before she could speak, dropping his hands from her cheeks so that they could snake around her waist, pulling her flush against him. “I need you, love,” he mumbled, his lips finding hers again.

“Polly told me that you’re looking to have Michael join,” (Y/N) took her chance and mumbled against his lips the second he broke away from her, “said that the day hell freezes over is the day he’ll be part of the business.”

“Not now, love’,” he deflected yet again, his face dropping to the spot where her collar met her jaw, his lips finding the skin present there.

“Tommy…” she meant to sigh, but his name escaped her lips through a moan instead.

“Hmm?” he hummed into the skin of her neck, his half-minded question doing more to distract her than it did to get her to continue the conversation.

“What are you doing with the business?”

Her question got him to lift his head, and he let his eyes dance over her face for a moment, licking his lips before he responded: “I have no interest in speaking about business at this moment,” he told her in a straightforward tone. His eyes then flitted to her lips for a moment before he leaned in and kissed her again.

This kiss was even more persistent than the last, and it made clear to (Y/N) what was on his mind. She let him win this time, staying focused on the feeling of his lips against hers as her hands traveled up to rest against his cheeks.

He pulled her deeper still, the feeling of his body flush against hers making her moan into the kiss as it intensified. Her hands didn’t stay on his cheeks for long before they were traveling upward to remove the peaked cap he was still wearing. She was going to do so with the intention of being able to tangle her hands into the longer strands of his hair, but something she felt on her left hand stopped her in her tracks. It had a sticky consistency, one that made her freeze mid-kiss and drop her hands from his face.

Tommy, still not wanting to stop, began placing kisses to her jawline, his hands working to bunch the fabric of her dress up so that he could take things further with her. He had a one track mind in this moment, working fervently to get what he needed.

But those thoughts were the furthest from (Y/N)’s mind now. Now, she wanted to get to the bottom of what she’d felt on the side of his face. It took a deal of strength for her to open her eyes, but when she did, they widened immediately.

“Do you know you’re bleeding?” she asked him, shock present in her voice when she was met with the sight of her red fingertips.

The grunt that Tommy elicited in response wasn’t enough for her, so she took matters into her own hands - quite literally - by grabbing his cheeks and lifting his face up so that she could inspect it. There was no injury that was screaming at her as she looked at him head on, but the reason behind the blood became clear when she turned his head to make him look to the right.

“You’ve got a cut on your temple,” she told him, squinting to inspect the injury further. It looked to be superficial, but still she had to wonder just for how long he’d been walking around with it bleeding. “What happened?” she tried then, manually turning his head so that he’d be looking at her again.

She knew just from the look in his eyes, how the once calm oceans were now darker from an impending storm, that she wouldn’t be getting much of an answer out of him. But hey…it was worth a try.

He let his eyes travel over her face, drinking in every inch of it as a grin tugged at the corner of his lips. “Was a long day, (Y/N),” he mumbled, his hands continuing what they were doing, bunching up the fabric until he found the smooth skin of her thigh.

(Y/N) was the one to lean in for a kiss this time, and she pulled back with a similar grin present on her face. “Well maybe there’s something that can be done about that,” she told him, her voice not even needing to take on a suggestive tone for him to make the next move.

She couldn’t help but shriek as he lifted her into his arms, his hands brushing higher up her thighs as she hooked her legs around his waist. A stream of giggles left her lips as Tommy walked them to the stairs and up to his bedroom.

He may have had a long day, but at least he was - hell, they both were - ending it on a high note.

—damn y’all…I know I promised they won’t all be this long, but oh boy did I get carried away here. Sorry, not sorry!

Tagged: @mystcldydrms @the-anxious-youth @cloudofdisney @look-at-the-soul @elenavampire21 @mrsalwayswrite @julkaamazing @evita-shelby @lilyrachelcassidy @notyour-valentine @shelbydelrey @onlydeadcells @peakyswritings @just-a-blackhole @watercolorskyy @strayrockette @peakyduchesss @alexxavicry @captivatedbycillianmurphy @yummycastiel @dark-academia-slut @tommystargirl @stevie75 @lyarr24 @signorellisantichrist @zablife @anotherblinder @midnightmagpiemama @cillmequick @rangerelik @dandelionprints @letal-y-poetica @itscheybaby @gypsy-girl-08 @insanitybyanothername @depxiety @raincoffeeandfandoms @dragons-are-my-favorite @youtifulsunshinelixfics @forgottenpeakywriter @cljordan-imperium @areyenotfondofmelobster @little-diable @thomashelbyswife @iambored24601 @shaddixlife

MASTERLIST

[lunarflux]

x: Thomas Shelby found his match in an information bookie who has eluded the grasp of the Peaky Blinders long enough to crumble their power over Birmingham. But at last, he found you. The ghost he'd been chasing was finally in front of him, but you were trickier than he expected. Dangerous, cunning - and a bit too much like himself. To buy your loyalty, he would have to sell his in equal measure. Loyalty for loyalty - blood for blood - how much were either of you willing to spill before the game changed entirely?

a/n: soooo i've never had a taglist before, so if i'm missing anyone please say something lol

part 16: the cold acknowledgement of truth

word count: 1,924

tag: @bruhidkjustwannaread | @rubyxx16 | @bellabarnes1378 | @johnmurphys-sass

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The truth—it was a dreadful term. It was awful because there was a truth, but beneath that single statement, there was a whole story beneath it. That's why you loved books, loved your shop. Inside those walls were a thousand truths and their stories. The truth was always simple, but everything beneath it was not.

You stared at the photo of Ezra, pinched tightly between your fingers. Tommy was asleep, but when you picked up his trousers, the photo fell to the floor. In that brief second when it drifted down just before hitting the carpet, you felt the world stop. Hundreds of memories coursed from your heart until it reignited your veins. While your first reflex was to rudely awake Tommy from his slumber, after your thoughts settled, you realized that the more important part of this moment was that you had to explain yourself. You had to tell the story you'd avoided for years. The reason why you ran and probably would continue to run.

"I was going to ask you in the morning."

When you turned, Tommy sat upright in bed. He stared out at the wall, almost unwilling to meet your eyes because he, too, felt like he was caught in the middle of the lie. It wasn't a lie, but still, he felt guilty.

"You..." You took a deep breath. "Where did you find this?"

"Finn found it at the bookshop. In your desk." Tommy reached for a cigarette and attempted to hand you one.

You just looked at him, eyes not quite glaring but concerned. "How long have you had this?"

"A while."

You snapped, hand flying across his cheek. Tommy stood and grabbed your wrists as you tried your hardest to hit him again. He hushed you, trying to understand your incoherent rant. When you finally gave up resisting, there were tears gathered at the corners of your eyes.

He released you, taking your face in his hands. He pleaded with you in spite of the anger you tried to direct back at him.

"I was going to ask you, alright?" Tommy reasoned. "But you were still healing. You needed time, y/n. I wasn't going to put you through anymore pain."

"So, your solution was to fuck me first and ask questions later?" Your voice was laced with rage, but he continued.

"You know that's not what happened last night, y/n. Hate me all you want for wanting to wait, but you can't be angry with me for not wanting to be the source of your frustration." Tommy stroked your cheeks with his thumbs. He kissed you gently, and while you wanted so badly to hit him again, you relaxed just enough to accept the gesture. "We need to know if he is the reason why Bingham tried to kill you. But I will only ask you when you're ready... Or if it's absolutely necessary."

"And is it absolutely necessary now?"

Tommy nodded softly.

You took several deep breaths to steady yourself. You'd never told anyone about Ezra, not since you left London. But if you had to say it now, the fact that Tommy was the one who was asking allowed you a small comfort.

“Bingham doesn’t just hurt people. He breaks them,” you said finally, your voice just above a whisper. “And he knew exactly how to break me.”

Tommy said nothing. He ran his fingers through your hair, letting you find your words at your own pace.

“His name was Ezra,” you continued, eyes slowly shutting as if you needed to recall his face. “He was kind. And firm. Solid in life and his decisions. But he wavered because of me. He…” Your voice faltered, and you swallowed hard, tears growing heavy before sliding down your cheeks. “Ezra, he had seizures. Sometimes for no reason. Other times because something was unbearable. We never knew when it would happen.”

Tommy’s jaw tightened, but he didn’t press you to continue, knowing you needed the space to speak freely.

“You know, even back then, I was like this. I loved secrets. I loved when others told me theirs, and I did the same then just as I am now,” you admitted. You opened your eyes and met his with a somber smile. “I used it for my benefit. I thought I didn't have anymore secrets to keep from Ezra, but I guess there was one.

"I found him on the floor." You shut your eyes again, your lip quivering as you struggled. "It happened again, another seizure. It was so… So violent. I tried to get help. They took him to the hospital, and when I tried to follow, Bingham was outside. Said he spoke to Ezra, but wouldn't tell me what it was about. The way he looked at me—fuck, Tommy—the way he looked at me with that fucking smile. He made me feel like whatever he said brought on the seizure, and if it was about me, then Ezra's death was on my hands."

Tommy rested his lips against your forehead, and he felt you tremble.

You inhaled sharply. The tears kept flowing, but you forced yourself to continue. "When Ezra's father came to me, he just told me to leave. Never show my face in London again. Said that a man named Alfred Bingham brought him disturbing information, and that he was paying me a courtesy because Ezra loved me."

You chuckled bitterly.

"So I left. I might have had another choice, but I couldn't find another way out."

“And then you came to Birmingham,” Tommy said, his voice soft but steady.

You looked at him, your eyes glistening but defiant. “Not at first. Bingham found me again soon after.”

The fire crackled in the silence that followed, the weight of your words slowly drifting in the air.

"He made sure I would think it was my fault." Your eyes became distant. You reached up to your neck, and your fingers stroked just below your chin. "And he made me pay for the burden of that guilt with my skin."

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Tommy poured himself a glass of whiskey, his movements deliberate and slow, the weight of his thoughts pulling at him. Polly sat in an armchair across from him, her sharp eyes fixed as she waited for him to finally speak.

“Well?” Polly prompted, her voice cutting through the silence like a blade. “You said it was serious. So speak.”

Tommy leaned back, rolling the glass between his fingers as he stared into the amber liquid. For a moment, he seemed almost reluctant, a rare vulnerability in his normally stoic demeanor.

“I know who he is,” he said finally, his voice low and controlled. "The man in the photograph."

Polly raised an eyebrow, her interest piqued. “Go on.”

“She had a man once,” Tommy began, setting the glass down. “Ezra. Young, from what I’ve pieced together. Picture-perfect sort of love—at least from the outside.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out the photograph the brothers had found, sliding it across the table to Polly.

She studied the image, her gaze softening for just a moment before she placed it back down. “And?”

Tommy’s jaw tightened. “He’s dead. And she blames herself.”

Polly frowned, leaning forward. “Blames herself how?”

“Bingham.” Tommy’s tone was bitter as he said the name, his hand curling into a fist. “He convinced her it was her fault. Told her that whatever happened to Ezra was because of her choices. Fed her guilt like poison until she believed every word.”

Polly sat back, exhaling sharply. “And was it her fault?”

“She doesn't know.” Tommy’s voice dropped, his frustration creeping into his tone. “She’s spent years living with the weight of it, not knowing if Bingham was right or if he was just using it to keep her under his thumb.”

Polly’s face hardened, her mind clearly working through the implications. “You're saying he’s not just going after her physically—he’s been in her head. For years.”

Tommy nodded, his fingers tapping against the arm of his chair. “It’s why she doesn’t let anyone close. Why she walked away that night, after…” He trailed off, his eyes flickering with a shadow of something unspoken.

Polly caught it, her lips pressing into a thin line. “My God, Tommy. How in deep are you?”

Tommy’s gaze snapped to hers, cold and sharp. “Deeper than I would usually care to.”

Polly tilted her head, studying him with a knowing look. “If you can't say you're in love with her now, then I'm afraid I've lost the point of all of this.”

Tommy didn’t answer, his jaw tightening as he looked away.

Polly sighed, leaning forward again. “Tommy, listen to me. Y/n isn't Grace. She doesn't just help you—she acts. She acts a little too much like you, and I know that's why you can't wrap your head around whatever it is that you feel for her. Most importantly, y/n seems to be the first woman in your life who is more than willing to prove you wrong without forcing you to change. She not only accepts you. She welcomes whatever darkness you might bring into her life because she's already in that world.

"If Bingham’s got her this twisted up over something she doesn’t even know the truth about, he’s not just a threat to her. He’s a threat to you. To all of us. If she starts doubting herself when it matters most, she could bring us all down.”

“I know that,” Tommy snapped, his voice harsher than he intended. He dragged a hand down his face, his frustration evident.

Polly softened, her sharp gaze turning more maternal. “It's about time you're honest with yourself as to why you're going through all this trouble for her, Tommy. Because if you don’t…” She trailed off, letting the weight of her words hang in the air.

Tommy stood, pacing toward the window. He looked out over the darkened grounds, his mind already turning over what needed to be done.

“If this is what it was supposed to feel like,” he said finally, his voice quieter but resolute. “I'm not so sure I ever really knew what it was.”

Polly rose, walking over to stand beside him. "What?"

"Being in love."

She placed her hand on his shoulder, masking the soft smile from his admission. “Just remember, Tom. You might think you’re protecting her, but some walls need to be broken before they can be rebuilt. And sometimes, people need more than a reason to fight. They need someone who gives a damn. She'll need more than a night in your bed to understand.”

Tommy’s expression didn’t change, but his silence spoke volumes.

Polly removed her hand and backed away towards the door, but he called her back with a truth more painful than he wanted to admit.

"He hurt her."

She stopped and turned to him. "How?"

The look in Tommy's eyes told Polly everything she needed to know.

She nodded softly just as the sympathy of anger started to bubble in her chest. Polly held her head high, the face of maternal strength returning with her resolve.

"Then make sure the bastard gets what he deserves."

As Polly left the room, Tommy stayed where he was, the weight of her words settling over him. His thoughts drifted back to you. To the woman who had survived so much but carried a pain you refused to share. And to the flicker of something he’d seen in your eyes—a longing, buried deep, that mirrored his own.

[yespleasetommyshelby]

Before he cheats - Modern Tommy Shelby x reader

I've had this song stuck in my head for days and it's gotta go 😩 This literally took me all of 2 hours to plan/write/post and it hasn't been proofread so bare with!

Enjoy! 🥰

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"56, 57, 58, 59, 60, that's it, I'm done." I huffed as i threw my phone onto the sofa besides me, frown on my face as I sighed. "That's two fucking hours!" I muttered to myself stamping my feet into my trainers I threw my coat on before picking up my phone on some final hope that I'd actually had a reply, but low and behold, obviously not.

"Fucking Thomas Shelby always thinking with his mother fucking dick." I continued to mutter under my breath as I left my home on Watery Lane slamming the door behind me, my chest burning in anger. Stepping out onto the path I shoved my hands into my coat pockets, fists clenched as I headed the short distance down the road to the house where I'd practically grown up.

"Watch where you're fucking going!" I screeched as a teenager flew past on his bike almost knocking me into the road. "Fucking males and their fucking shit." I continued to slate each and every male that came into view in the 2 minutes it took to get to my destination, 'men are all the bloody same' my mum used to say, 'honestly, get yourself a women, their much easier.' Looking back maybe I should've taken her advice.

"Where is he?" I asked as I pushed open the doors to the betting shop that sat in Watery Lane, the punters and staff going silent as I watched with my hands on my hips. "Oh come on, you know exactly who I'm talking about!" I all but yelled into the silent room, after being with Tommy for 2 years now I had almost as much authority as him, almost.

"Y/n, not here." Polly's voice had my head on a swivel, finally spotting her in the doorway to John's office I stormed over ignoring the looks I was getting from everyone.

"Where is he Pol?" I sighed as I flopped down into Johns office chair. "And why are you in here?" I asked noticing that John wasn't in his own office.

"He's disappeared with Esme somewhere, honestly these Shelby boys and their dicks are ridiculous." She mumbled, lighting the cigarette she held in her hand.

"Tell me about it." I sighed, knowing that if Tommy wasn't in the office he was only going to be in one other place. "He's at the Garrison then." I asked, watching as she froze slightly before shaking her head.

"I think so, yeah, what's he done this time?" She sighed as she rubbed her eyes, having dealt with nothing but pissed up (and off) men and women placing bets they can't afford all morning, dealing with her nephews love life was definitely not on her to do list.

"Nothing Pol, he's done nothing which is the fucking problem! He was supposed to meet me 2 hours ago and I haven't heard anything since a lousy morning text all because he's too busy with that fucking whore Grace!" I ranted, reaching out and taking one of her cigarettes before lighting it and slamming the lighter down on the desk. "You know what I'm done." My voice sounded much more convinced then my mind as I said the words.

Shaking my head I stood up in a flash, out of Johns office and into Tommys within a second, without looking I reached behind Tommys desk and picked up the baseball bat that I knew he kept there in case of emergency's. Pushing my way past Polly who was stood in the doorway I made my way through the punters and out into the street without a second look, the bat weighing heavy in my hand.

"Y/n! What are you doing?!" Pol's voice follows me out into the street. "Come back inside!" She yelled, passers by stopping to look at the scenes, before a sharp look from Pol had them walking on.

"Woah! What's going on here?" I was stopped in my tracks as Arthur, John and Esme appeared from the corner ahead of me, grins on their faces as they looked from the bat in my hand to the scowl on my face.

"Looks to me that she's off to play baseball." John laughed, his input met with a thud on his chest by his wife.

"Would you two idiots shut up already." She giggled slightly as she pushed her husband into his older brother. "Now what's up with the bat?" She asked, smirking slightly as she had a feeling she knew exactly where you was going, after sitting on the phone for an hour the last time Tommy pissed you off she knew not to get in the way.

"Like John boy said." I shrugged, my hold on the bat tightening ever so slightly. "I'm going to practice baseball with a nice new shiny Land Rover I saw parked outside of the Garrison." I grinned before pushing my way through the trio and continuing on my way.

I couldn't help but let out a loud laugh as the Garrison came into view and just as I had predicted there was brand new Land Rover sat outside its doors. The brand new Land Rover that only 3 days ago I had travelled up to Scotland to collect with Tommy, not knowing that it would be the last journey I'd take with both him and the car.

"Y/n come on back to the shop love, we'll sort this shit out." Polly pleaded once more making me stop in my tracks, the Shelby's had been like a family to me, even in the years before me and Tommy had officially gotten together, being friends with Ada and all.

"I'm sorry Pol." I sighed shaking my head as I turned to face her and the trio that had followed behind. "But right now, right now he's probably slow dancing with that bleach blonde tramp and she's probably getting frisky. Right now he's probably buying her some fruity little drink 'cause she can't shoot whisky." I laughed a little, knowing for a fact that she couldn't handle the drink that Thomas Shelby worships so much. "Right now he's probably up behind her with a pool stick showing her how to shoot a combo, but he don't know." I laughed as I reached into my pocket and pulled out my keys, my hand wrapping around the longest and sharpest of them all, ironically the spare key Tommy had given me for this exact car.

I could help but grin as I stuck my key through the shiny black metal of the drivers door, the small act creating some kind of pleasure, a pleasure that only increased as I walked my way down the car, the key dragging a horribly crooked line right down the side.

"Right that's enough now! Cut this shit out!" Polly yelled, her eyes flickering between her nephews burnt lover and the door which he could come through at any second. "Think about what you're doing y/n." She almost pleaded, or at least as close as I'd ever seen her.

Ignoring her I made my way round to the passengers side, the metal bat dragging across the floor being the only sound to be heard, except for the muffled giggles that the other two Shelby brothers struggled to keep back. A wave of emotion hit me as I climbed into the car, a lone tear slipping down my cheek which I quickly wiped away.

"He doesn't deserve it." I muttered to myself as I quickly wiped it away without a second thought. "Fuck him and all the whores he's had in this fucking car." I growled gripping my keys as I began to carve my name into the leather seat.

"What the fuck is going on right now?!" My head snapped up as I heard another voice, Ada having stumbled upon my little rage room experiment, shall we call it.

"Ada! Nice of you to join us, i'll tell you what's going on shall I?" I asked as I hopped down from the car swing the bat up over my shoulder as I waved over to her. "Right now, your brother, you know the one that I'm supposedly engaged to, is in there living it up with that Irish tart of a woman!" I yelled, using the bat to point towards the door, not caring how loud my voice had gotten. "Right now she's probably up singing some white trash version of Shania karaoke, right now she's probably saying 'I'm drunk' and he's thinking that he's gunna get lucky! Right now, he's probably dapping on three quids worth of that bathroom polo!" I screamed, the more thought I put into what was actually going on just inside fuelling the rage even more.

I let out a gut wrenching scream as I swung the bat into his headlight, once, twice, three times moving on to the next I swung again laughing as the glass crashed to the floor before swing it into the windscreen for good measure. Throwing the bat to the floor I put my hands on my hips and grinned as I looked at the mess that was Tommy Shelby's new car before making my way over to Arthur.

"I need your knife." Holding my hand out infront of him. "Please Arthur." I sighed knowing that he always carried one no matter where he went.

With a sigh and grin he reached into his pocket and placed the small switch blade into my hand.

"Seriously Arthur?! Why the fucking hell did you give her a knife?!" Polly yelled as she threw her arms up in frustration, knowing that if anyone was going to be killed for this it wasn't going to be her.

"She asked nicely Pol." He shrugged, loving the fact that his brother was about to have the surprise of a lifetime and all he had to do was sit and watch.

Sticking the knife into the front tyre I smirked as the hiss of air filled the air, walking round and putting a knife slash in all of the tires for good measure, I stood back with a grin laughing at the look of amusement over the 3 Shelby siblings faces, the smirk on Esme's and the fed up look Polly had been giving me for the last 10 years.

"What the fucking hell is going on?!" The man of the hour roared as he stepped out onto the street, the pub doors banging against the walls before Grace appeared behind him, eyes cast down. "Answer me!" He bellowed, the vein in his neck popping with each syllable.

"Hi Tommy, remember me?" I asked sarcastically making his eyes jump to me, his face dropping ever so slightly. "You know, the fiance that you used to have!" I stepped forwards as I spoke shoving him back slightly, knowing if it was anyone else they would have recieved a bullet to the head, but I knew he'd never lay a hand on me.

"Y/n? I thought we were meeting later?" He asked, brows furrowed in confusion as he pulled his phone out of his pocket, the numerous texts and missed calls flashing on the screen and the time that read two and a half hours after the planned meeting time. "Oh." He muttered, wiping his hand across his face. "What have you done?" He asked as his eyes trailed along the nice long line that now travels the length of his new car.

"Yeah, oh." I nodded, laughing slightly as Grace stepped out besides him. "I suppose you missed the show while you were in there with ol' Gracie here. But I'll give you a rundown shall I? Well I dug my key into the side of your pretty little souped up four wheel drive, carved my name into your leather seats. I took a Louisville slugger to both headlights and slashed a hole in all four tires, maybe next time you'll think before you cheat." I couldn't help the tears that fell next, the adrenaline slowing and my whole body began to ache, the end of an era, me and the Shelby's.

"Y/n-" "No." I cut him off, not wanting to listen to any kind of reasoning he would throw at me, anything to get him back in the good book. "I might've saved a little trouble for the next girl, because the next time that you cheat, oh you know it won't be on me, no, not on me." I wiped my eyes before pulling of the ring that he had given me 6 months ago. "Guess I'll give it to you aye, Gracie." I muttered, throwing the ring at her feet before turning to walk away.

"Y/n!" His voice reached my ears just as I'd passed Polly, Arthur, John, Esme and Ada. "Y/n please!"

"Bye Tom!" I yelled without turning back, keeping my head up I shoved my hands into my pockets and carried on, not giving them the chance to see the tears that were currently streaming down my face.

-----

There you have it! My first fic where they don't end up happily ever after, hopefully you enjoyed!

Feel free to send any requests! 💖

[nyasiaaaaa]

In the Bleak Mid-Winter

In the Bleak Mid-Winter

Pairing: Thomas Shelby x Fem reader (Nurse)  

Summary: This is a story about two people who become constants in each others lives, and eventually fall for each. While one learns to love again, the other learns the cost of loving a man like him. 

Word count: 4.3k

Warnings: Cursing, blood, Slight smut ( hand job), Kissing, angst, hurt/ no comfort Tommy Shelby, ( If I missed anything or you think something should be added please tell me.) ( Also Y/N is on dick, IDKY she acts like this)

A/N: part 1 takes place during season two, part 2/3 season 3 and 4/5/6 season 4. This is a Slow burn there will be smut eventually. 

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 5  part 6

******************************************

Week 1: 

 The first 72 hours after surgery were rough; everyone was waiting around to see if he would slip in the night. He made it through. Well, he started breathing on his own, so that was good, but he still hasn't woken up. In the mornings, you would continuously walk past his room, peaking through the window, seeing if he was still alive, seeing who visited him. You always watched, but you never went in. During the day, you worked with other patients, and at night, you would sit by his bed and watch him sleep every night. 

Week 2: 

Tommy was still in a coma, and every day, your fears worsened. All the what-ifs ran through your head; what if he never woke up? Still, every night, you were by his side waiting, watching. 

Week 3: 

Two nights ago, Tommy woke up; you were "talking" to him, which you did most nights to help with the silence and pass the time. You were busy ranting about your day and this horrible patient who had come into the ER as you knitted a sweater. 

"So then she yelled at me, telling me I'm a stupid bitch who needs to go get a real doctor to check her out. So then, you know what I did? I gave her a piece of my mind," you said, pausing to focus on the sweater for a second. 

"You did, eh?" 

If it wasn't for the fact that you could see his eyes open, you would've thought you had hallucinated. You rushed over to him, dropping the sweater on the floor.

"Tommy, are you ok? How do you feel? Do you need some water? Hold on, let me go get the Doctor." You were about to rush off when you felt yourself being pulled back slightly

"Let another nurse get the doctor; you didn't finish telling me your story." His words came out rushed, almost as if he was pushing them out so he could take a breath. 

"Ok," You laughed as you wiped the tears on your face and held his hand tightly. 

Week 4:

   Tommy was getting better every day; he wasn't making huge milestones, but he was meeting his goals. 

   You walked in to check on Tommy during lunch after finishing up with most of your work for the day. You caught him trying to bring his head down to his hands so he could put the cig in his mouth. This might not seem like much, but the fact that he could get the cig out of the box in the first place was huge.

 You walked up to him, taking the cig out of his hand before licking your lip and running the cig across them. You held the cig between your lips as you reached down and got a match from the box; you lit up, taking a drag before placing it in Tommy's mouth.

"Thank you"

"You welcome." 

You walked towards the end of his bed, picking up the paper for Today and walking back up towards him, pulling a chair with you along the way. You placed the chair next to him, taking a seat as you flipped through the paper. 

You stopped flipping to reach up and take the cig from Tommy to ash it before giving it back to him.

"Anything interesting," he asked. 

"Nope, the only thing is that it seems your horse came in 3rd place at the derby; congratulations, Mr.Shebly." 

Again, you reached up, taking the cig from his mouth, ashing it, and then giving it back. Tommy rested his head back and closed his eyes as he finished his cig.

"What else does it say?" he turned to look at you. "Read it to me," he asked, and you did; for the rest of the afternoon, you sat there reading the paper to Tommy as you lit and ashed his cigs for him. 

Week 5: 

 It didn't take long for you to catch on that Tommy couldn't read. Well, it's not that he couldn't read, but he couldn't see. Tommy was on a load of medication, and you couldn't even remember everyone, let alone the dose of each one. You were getting his medicine ready for him, but you could only remember three out of six of the medications, and you didn't read the doses for them.

You looked around for Tommy's chart and saw it was on the nightstand across the room next to him.

"Tommy read the medicines and doses out loud for me; I can't remember if I'm doing this right, so just read them all, please,"

Tommy grabbed the clipboard and looked at it; you waited a bit, giving him some time to locate the information.

Seconds turn into minutes, and Tommy still hasn't said a word; you turn around to catch him holding the clip close to his face, moving it far away, and then back close up. 

"Tommy"

He looked over the papers one more time before handing the clip out to you; you walked up, took it out of his hand, and then walked back over to the medicines; you fished up and brought them all over to Tommy.

"I'm going for lunch with the other nurse. I'll be back." You walked toward the door, opening it before you turned back toward Tommy. 

"I'll send for the eye doctor to come about." You gave him a tight smile before closing the door and heading out for lunch with your friends.  

Week 6: 

Tommy started his physical therapy a couple of days ago, and every day, you accompanied him. You didn't have to be there for his physical therapy, but you wanted to, and you had the feeling Tommy did, too. 

You sat at the opposite side of Tommy, who stood at the end of parallel bars; he held himself up as the physical therapist told him what to do. 

"Ok. Now, Mr.Shelby, when you are ready, start walking down to her; take your time. Don't rush." 

Tommy started to walk towards you. It wasn't the most stable, and it was very slow as he basically dragged himself along the bars as he walked. He only made it a few steps before taking a break to catch his breath. You could tell he was embarrassed if anyone saw him right now….

It's been a few minutes, and Tommy still hasn't moved; you don't know if he's in pain or if his mind is racing with fear of the future.

You pick the newspaper up next to you and quickly glance over.

"Tommy, I knew you had a horse racing this weekend, but you didn't say it won first place." You held the newspaper up, covering your face as you spoke. Your poker face wasn't the best, but you needed to get Tommy out of his head.

"Bring it here." 

You knew you had him, seeing as it was early in the morning, and neither John nor Arthur had been by to tell him the actual placing of his horse.

"Wow, won by an Inch, a close call, they say. Hey, what's the type of payout from a win like this?" You Ignored him as you continued to "Skim" through the paper.

You peeked around the paper to see Tommy walking towards you. He was still struggling, but his steps had much more determination behind them. 

He reached the end of the bars and leaned on them as he held his hand out. 

"Oi, give it here."

"You can't even see the words on the paper, Tommy."

"Don't care" 

You handed him the paper, and even though Tommy couldn't see, it didn't really matter; on the cover of the newspaper was a big picture of a gangster who had been killed. 

Tommy's horse had raced the other day, and the papers had the result, but it would be on Today's paper, and Tommy was holding yesterday's. 

He let out a puff of air as he read over the paper. He looked up at you raising the papers, and he did,

"Where's today's paper?"

"I don't know; I think the mail boy is running late." You glanced over your shoulder as if you were looking for him. "He should be here soon, maybe even by the time you finish your therapy," you gave him a smile with a thumbs up.

"Now, going on, turn around; you still have about an hour to go," you said, cheering him on.

He looked at you briefly before Turning around and walking back towards the Doctor. 

You watched Tommy continue on the bars before switching to some weight lifting and more. Today ( Monday) was the start, but by Friday, you could already see the difference in his steps and how confidently he took them; he was getting better and stronger every day. 

Later, you learn that his horse did, in fact, win first place. 

Week 7:

Tommy has been doing very well in physical therapy to the point where he is off the bars and is now walking around with a cane; he can't go far, but it's a start. You still go to every appointment even though no one asked you to; you still go, just like how you still sit with Tommy through the night even though he's been out of the woods for weeks. You don't know why you are doing this, but you can't stop. 

Week 8:

You were exhausted; you had been doing this for eight weeks now, and to be honest, you were surprised you had been able to keep this up; you hadn't spent a night at your apartment in weeks. You were always at the hospital during the day and night; you slept next to Tommy at night but only caught a couple of hours if you were lucky. 

And your body ached in places you never knew could hurt; sleeping in that chair every night started to make you have bad posture. You had to stop; you had to start going home, getting a good night's sleep, and taking showers in the comfort of your own home; you need rest and space. 

You decide that starting Today, you will go home instead of staying with Tommy for the night; you finish your shift like usual, but instead of heading towards Tommy's room, you head outside to head home. You decide not to tell Tommy that you aren't going to be "staying the nights" anymore; you don't see any reason to. Tommy is usually asleep by the time you come, and you are gone by the time he wakes up, so he wouldn't know the difference anyway, and you feel like if you did say something, he might see you as…… Creepy. 

Week 9:

You ended up taking three days off. That first night you got home, you slept the best you have in your whole life, and the following day, you couldn't get up, so you called off; you stayed home relaxed, read, and just spent time with yourself. You didn't realize how bad you need this until day two came, and you called out again because the idea of returning to work makes you sick. 

Again, you rested, cleaned, and just spent time with yourself; the quiet is what you enjoyed the most, and the smell of anything other than chemicals and bleach. Again, on the third day, you called out, but you told yourself that this would be the last day; after this, you would head back to work, so you needed to enjoy it while it lasted, and you did. You went to the market and shopped for food, went out to the pictures during the time, so it was empty and quiet, and even went to a boutique in town that you've always seen but never gone to. By the end of your day, you were tired, but in a good way, you felt good enough to head back to work. 

The next day, you headed to work with a bit of a skip in your step; you missed Tommy; you would never say that out loud, but you did. 

You walked in and said a quick hello to the other nurses before. Heading off to Tommy's room, as soon as you entered the room, you smelled opioids. You looked around the room for the source and found a pipe next to Tommy on the bed. You picked it up and turned it over in your hands as you studied it.

You reached down and pushed Tommy. 

"Wake up, Tommy. Wake up." You pushed him again; he was lying on his stomach, and his arms circled his pillow. You pushed his once more as you yelled, "TOMMY!"

He began to stir as he lifted his head up to look at you; you looked at yourself dazed before darting his eyes to what was in your hands and then back to your face.

"What?" his voice was raspy. 

"W-what is this, Tommy? This is bad for you, and especially with your injury, you have no business doing this; the damage it could cause is irreversible.” You were upset. You had gone over everything Tommy could and couldn't have, what he could and couldn't do. 

"I needed to sleep," he said before laying his head back down. 

"You sleep fine; if you didn't, you could've asked for some tablets to help."  

You guess he was tired of hearing your voice cause he covered his ears, letting out a groan; he Lay there for a second before turning and sitting up; he looked at you and nodded his head toward the cane, leaning up against the wall.

You walked over, got it for him, handing it to him as you still awaited an answer for why he was smoking this.

"Tommy, you don't make sense; I've been watching over you for weeks; not once have you had trouble sleeping; every night when I'm here with you, you've fallen asleep like a baby full off milk. Smoking this can cause brain-" 

You stopped talking as you realized what you just said. He didn't wait for you to continue, and he stood up, putting all his weight on the chain as he pushed himself off the bed. He starts walking, and you let him pass with a word as he heads to the bathroom. 

**************

You haven't talked to Tommy all day, you've been avoiding him, and you're unsure what to say. 

You've walked past his room a couple of times, and every time you peak in, it's like he can sense you cause he immediately stops what he's doing and turns to catch your eyes. You quickly turn away and rush off to do nothing, nowhere. 

Nightfall came, and you couldn't go home; you didn't want to. 

You walked towards his room slowly; you were nervous.

You enter the room and is relieved as you see Tommy asleep; you pull up a chair next to the bed. You rest your legs against his bed as you slide down in the chair, trying to get comfortable; you close your eyes as you try to call to sleep.

"The bed would be more comfortable."

If he could see in the dark, he would definitely know that you're awake. Your body practically flinched at his statement; your eyes remained closed, though, too scared of what you might see when you open them. 

You lay as still as possible, hoping that he would think you were sleeping.

"You can sleep there if you want, but if you don't," he trailed off as he pulled back the blanket and made space for you.

You remain quiet not because you still want him to think you sleep but because you don't know what to say or what to do. Getting in bed with him would be highly inappropriate; he's your patient, and you're his nurse.

But your body was already starting to hurt from this chair, and the night had barely begun, and besides, it was just sleeping. 

You crack your eyes open to get a quick look and find Tommy already lying back down with the covers still thrown over, making a spot for you; you get up slightly before sitting back down; you couldn't do this; there's no way you should just g- 

You got up so quick that you didn't even realize that you had started to walk towards the side of the bed where Tommy had made space for you; you slipped your shoes off as you slowly crawled into the bed. 

You were glad that Tommy had his back towards you; you couldn't even begin to imagine what might happen if he watched you crawl up next to him. 

You lay down, slipping your legs under the covers as you pull the top half over your body. You also decide to lay with your back towards Tommy, leaving plenty of room between the two of you. You snuggled up in the cover and let out a sigh of relief as the aches your body felt started to go away. 

You close your eyes and again called out to sleep.

You felt the bed shake, and you froze.

You were already warm, but now you felt hot.

Tommy had pressed up against you and put his arm around your waist, tugging you back closer to him, 

"Tommy wh-"

"Shhh," he whipped softly. 

He had nuzzled his head in between your neck. He molded his body to fit yours. You just lay there, unsure of what to do, but as soon you realized that his body stilled and his breath evened out, You knew that he was sleeping and that you were stuck. You lay there for what seemed like forever till, eventually, your eyes grew heavy, and you fell asleep.

Week 10:

Things between you and Tommy were…… something. It wasn't awkward, but a lot of things went unsaid. You were grateful for the lack of conversation; nothing ruins the moment more than asking what this was. Though you fought it at first, now you can't imagine a night that doesn't end with you in his arms. To say you're conflicted doesn't even come close; every night, you're one step closer to doing something you can't come back from, something that would be hard to regret. 

Week 11:

You were trying to do paperwork at the nurse's station when you heard your name being called by a fellow nurse; you looked up, giving her your full attention.

"Mr.Shelby refuses to let me give him a bath and request that you come see him." 

"Ummm, ok, thanks." You slowly get up and head toward Tommy's room

Tommy hurt himself a couple of days ago. Because of his incident, he required help doing things like using the restroom, putting on clothes, and showering. You had helped him with the clothes but had been off shift when help with the other things was requested. 

You entered the room and headed to the bathroom, seeing as you didn't see him anywhere; once you entered, you saw him sitting in the tub with his back facing you. As you slowly walked closer to him, you saw that he was smoking; as soon as you were in his peripheral, he turned his head to meet your eyes. He took a long drag as he looked you up and down; you stood there uncertain, hopping from foot to foot; your discomfort was written on your face, clear as day. You couldn't help it; Thomas Shelby was sitting In front of you in a bath, fully naked. 

"You asked for me?" He just looked at you, eyes skimming your body repeatedly as he finished his cig. 

"Doc says I need help, can't do much, hate to tear my stitches." 

"And what was wrong with the other nurse?"

"I don't know her." he struggled his shoulder and put the cig out, looking up at you. 

You tried to take a deep breath, but it got cut short once you remembered the situation you were in. Your throat felt as if it was closing with every step you took toward him. Your hand fidgeted by your side, grabbing your dress and trying to ground yourself. You took one final breath as you reached him. 

Deciding you couldn't look him in the face, you got behind him on your knees. He sat up straight in the tub, and you reached towards the wall to grab the sponge from the hook. You dipped the sponge in the water and started washing his back. 

It was painfully quiet; all you could hear was the water splashing and your shaky breaths. 

You finished with his back and put your hand on his shoulder, pulling him towards you.

 You're so close that his back rests against your chest; you press your hand to his chest to keep him in place as you continue to wash his chest. 

He stares up at you, but you keep your eyes focused, 

because your eyes are glued to his chest, you can't help but notice the scars littered across it. 

You let go of the sponge and began to trace every scar that you see across his chest, 

You know there's a story behind everyone 

And you want to hear it. 

Suddenly, he reaches up and grabs your hand; your eyes snap up to look at his, and his eyes dart down to your lips before looking back at you. 

You were barely breathing before, and you're certainly not breathing now.

He let go of your hand and reached up to grab your face; he brushed his thumb across your cheek before pulling you in. 

Your lips brushed against his playfully, almost as if you were hesitant,

But you weren't 

You crashed your lips into his

He grabbed your head in between his hands, pulling you closer. His lips were rough against yours, and he tasted slightly of tobacco, but you didn't care.

You were close but felt the need to be closer. You reached your hand down in the water and grabbed him; you gave him a slight squeeze before stroking him. 

His cock twitched in your hand, and his breath hitched. 

 He let go of your face as his head fell against the rim of the tub; his breath quickened as you increased your pace and bent down to kiss his chest and up his neck. 

You stop at his jaw, nibbling along it before going back down to the base of his neck and slowly licking up; you lick up till you reach his lips, pausing and hovering above them. 

You slow down your pace and stroke him slowly as you kiss him.

Suddenly, Thomas places his hand on top of yours, stopping your movements; he pulls your face back from his and just stares at you. 

You're not sure what the look is, but the feeling in your stomach tells you it's not good.

You pull your hand away from him and sit back on your knees. 

He gives you a look over once more before clearing his throat and turning away from you.

He grabs a cigs and lights it before putting his head back and closing his eyes.

You just sit there.

You look down at the floor, your eyes shifting back and forth as your eyes begin to fill up with tears.

Your throat starts to burn as you hold back your tears.

You get up almost in a panic; you refuse to cry in front of this man. 

You walk out of the bathroom, and you don't run. 

He can't know. 

The door barely closes behind you before you let the tears fall. You wipe your face fast with your hands. 

Your walk slowly turns into a jog before you start running towards the nearest bathroom. 

You push open the door, shutting it and locking it behind you.

You take deep breaths to calm yourself down; words can't describe how you feel. 

Why

Why

Why.

Millions of reasons and insecurity raced through your head, you felt sick to your stomach. 

You've never felt so stupid in your life; of course, ...... of course, he would never. 

You kept saying to yourself, but you couldn't even think of a real reason as to why. 

You felt someone knock on the door and yell something, but you weren't listening; you were trying to get out of your head.

You pushed yourself off the door and walked towards the mirror. You gripped the side of the sink as you stared yourself down. 

You took one last deep breath before standing straight and fixing your hair and clothes. 

You grab a couple of paper towels, cleaning your face up. 

You stand there looking at yourself in the mirror, making sure you look presentable. 

You nodded towards yourself before heading out of the bathroom and back towards your station. 

You sit back at your desk and begin some paperwork. 

The rest of your day goes smoothly, Thomas never rings, and you never go in there. 

You finish up your day and head home. 

Once you arrive home, you grab the bottle and take it to bed with you. 

You lay in the bed, all bundled up, taking the occasion swing of your drink.

Staring at nothing. 

Till you fall asleep 

Week 12:

You haven't seen Thomas since that night.

Not because you've been avoiding him, but when you came to work the next day, he was gone.

An overnight nurse said he checked out a little after you left. 

You don't know how you felt about that, honestly. 

You aren't conflicted between feeling happy or sad about it.

Honestly, you feel sorta relieved, 

Now you don't have to decide whether you could be with a man like him. 

You felt free, 

from him 

And from being honest with yourself about how you feel about him. 

The only thing that you know for sure is that you'll pray that you never run into Thomas Shelby again. 

Because honestly—

Despite everything

You're still hooked.

**************************

Tag List:

@fannibalsrule @mysticalbouquetwolf-posts

[zablife]

Drinks with Polly in the Parlor

Requested by @notyour-valentine for my 2K celebration An Evening at Arrow House. Warning: This is a dark fic 💀

"Would you care for a glass of champagne, Aunt Polly?" you asked sweetly. You wanted to impress your husband's aunt with your hospitality, but you needed a glass of liquid courage yourself after being left alone with the imposing Shelby matriarch. The silence which had already grown between you was terrifying and made you feel like a failure.

She turned from the mirror where she was checking her crimson lipstick, one perfectly manicured eyebrow arched in your direction as she replied coldly, "Champagne is for celebrations, my dear. I'm afraid a toast seems woefully late considering your nuptials took place weeks ago. Wouldn't you agree?"

You could only blink in shock. It was true you and Tommy had eloped without a single family member present to witness your vows, but he assured you it was the done thing. This was his third marriage after all and you agreed a lavish affair would be inappropriate, especially given the fact that he divorced his second wife less than a year ago. Surely Polly understood all this? Then again, the withering glance she gave, proved otherwise.

"I'm sorry if we've offended you..." you began.

Polly waved off your apology before you could finish, crossing to the bar to pour her own drink. Like Tommy she preferred Irish whisky, neat and she sipped it slowly as she looked you up and down carefully. A small smile began to form on her lips as she noticed the abundance of diamonds caressing your delicate neck.

"It's not you or I who should be apologizing. My nephew can be a careless man," she hummed, smile quickly fading as she stared at her own reflection once more, seeing something which obviously displeased her. "I always thought he favored his mother, but he is so like his father at times the way he treats the women in this family."

"Excuse me?" you asked, twisting your fingers and wondering what could be keeping Tommy. You were beginning to feel uncomfortable with the turn in conversation.

She chuckled darkly as she stopped in front of you, her hazel eyes dancing with a manic energy that made your stomach drop in anticipation of her next words. "I died for him once. Did you know that?"

You swallowed thickly and shook your head, fingers now clutching the cool metal at your throat as if it might make your husband appear more quickly to save you.

"It's alright, I escaped the noose," she assured you, lowering the volume of her voice to that relegated for the telling of secrets. "Climbed through it like a window to the other side. And I found you can do anything you want cause there are no rules, cause there are no risks. When you’re dead already, you’re free," she whispered as though she was imparting wisdom you might find useful one day.

"He did me a favor really," she mused. "Now I'm the one protecting this family because I'm the only one who can see it all clearly. My second sight keeps us safe, you know." However, you only heard the rantings of a madwoman and your body began to tremble involuntarily.

"Oh, darling. You're shaking," she noted, reaching a hand out to steady you. Her fingers grasped your forearm, nails digging in like talons, and anchoring you to the spot. With saccharine sweetness she cooed, "That's a beautiful necklace," drawing out the vowels in beautiful until it sounded like a taunt. "What does a woman like you have to do to earn a bauble like that?"

"T-tommy chose it on our honeymoon because he loves me," you stuttered, eyes searching hers for a sign she would release you from this trap you'd unwittingly fallen into.

"Diamonds," she said reverentially. "Goodness, you are special then, aren't you?" she couldn't help but add sarcastically.

"I should hope so," you answered in a defiant tone you could no longer hold back given her blatant disrespect.

Her hand slipped from you and you took two steps backward as she smirked. "You know it was sapphires for Grace. They represent wealth and abundance so that suited her I suppose. Rubies for Lizzie, all vitality and passion. But here you stand wearing diamonds," she pronounced.

Feeling the clasp of the necklace dig into your skin in the same painful way Polly's nails had clawed against your arm, your irritation grew. "And what does that mean?" you demanded. Your unease caused the gems to weigh down upon you like bricks. You tried to inhale deeply, but found it difficult to draw breath.

"Some say eternity," she answered in amusement before turning her concentration to your neck. A cackle erupted from her lips as though the idea of your union was a complete joke. Your anger mounted along with the suffocating feeling, closing your throat so you couldn't scream or reply.

"Others say invincibility," she added. "But that's not what you two have. I can see it in the air around you. I know what you are," she proclaimed, eyes narrowing at you hatefully. She closed her fists tightly by her side, knuckles white from the force. And that's when you felt the crushing grip at your windpipe. You fell to your knees, hands flying to your throat, ripping at the necklace or whatever phantom force seemed to be cutting off your air supply. As you rocked back and forth spluttering and choking, Polly stood over you triumphantly.

-----------

When Tommy came looking for you in the parlor, Polly sat sipping her whisky calmly on the sofa. His eyes immediately darted to your tear stained face as he heard your hiccuped sobs coming fast between uneven breaths. "Y/n?" he called to you in panic, crossing the room in quick strides before Polly held up a hand for him to stop.

"She has something to say, Tommy," she announced, looking to you expectantly.

Tommy furrowed his brow in confusion as his foot came to rest over something small and hard. Stooping to retrieve the object, the hurt became evident on his face as he surveyed the floor where your beautiful necklace lay in ruins, a constellation of diamonds cast over the carpet.

As the jewel winked up at him, he looked from his palm and back to you as you stood, wobbling slightly from lightheadedness. "I've made a terrible mistake," you sobbed, brushing past him and running from the room with the urgency of someone fleeing their own execution.

Before he could turn to follow, Polly's eyes flicked up to Tommy's, holding him motionless within her hypnotic gaze as she promised answers. "Perhaps now she'll tell you what she really wanted here because it was never you, my boy."

------------

Tag List:

@evita-shelby

@shelbydelrey

@alanadetigy

@severewobblerlightdragon

@lovemissyhoneybee

@theshelbyslimited

@kittycatcait219

@notyour-valentine

@areyenotfondofmelobster

@polishcrazyone

@elenavampire21

@little-diable

@lyarr24

@jomarch-wannabe

@helen06dreamer

@raincoffeeandfandoms

@dearshelby

@cillmequick

@call-sign-shark

@peakyltd

@brummiereader

@runnning-outof-time

@emotionalcadaver

@thegreatdragonfruta

@noforkingclue

[queenquinzel715]

1. John Shelby 18+

Wrd count 1,231

1. John Shelby 18+

Y/n P.O.V

If you told me I'd end up being a nanny to the peaky blinders I'd laugh. I was looking for a job when I got back from being a nurse in France. You would think I would've been able to get a job at a hospital, but no one will hire a gypsy. I met the Lees when I was at the fairs to become their first aid, and that's when I met Polly. She had the kids by herself, and they were pulling her around. I was standing next to the dart game, listening to them whine and beg for all different stuff. With one quick 'hey' they all stopped to look at me.

"Straighten up and act like you have some home training." I tell them with a small smile to Polly.

She asked me if I had any experience with kids, and when I told her my job experiences she asked if I could be a nanny. She told me it pays well, comes with rooming, and will have protection. I accepted when Katie asked me to stay with them, because she had fun with me that day.

The day I moved in was the day I met John. He gave me a hard stare as he was leaving, and didn't come back until dinner only to leave again. I can see why the kids act out, they want attention from their father. The longer I stayed the more angry I got, so one day while the bigger kids were in school I took the smaller one with me to the betting shop. I sat the toddler with Polly as I went to find John. I walk inside his office to him, lighting his cigarette.

"Why are you here? Who's hurt?" He walks around his desk to stand in front of me.

"No one is visibly hurt, but your kids are hurting to see you." I told him. "Yet you wonder why they act up so much."

"I see them when I can." He scuffs as he turns away.

"You see them when they eat dinner. You stay at the Garrison until late night when you could at least stay to put them to bed, and then go to the pub." I rant my frustration out.

"Who do you think you are?" He scolds.

''I'm the one who's drying your kid's face when they are crying for their father who would rather be at the Garrison than be with them!" I get louder as I talk.

With that I stormed out of his office, I couldn't look at him anymore. I sat with Polly until school got out, and she laughed at how long I lasted holding in my true colors. I told her I can't accept men who have an army of kids only to ignore them. As I leave John comes out of his office. He kisses his daughter on her head, looks me in the eyes, and walks away.

After that day he would stay after dinner, read to them, play with them, and would help put them to bed. It took a month for them to actually believe John would keep doing this when he was actually free. At some point once the kids were finally calm we would sit, and talk about anything that happened that day. It would be mostly me listening to his war stories.

"Thank you." He says randomly as we sit in the quiet.

"What for?" I smile.

"For yelling at me in my office. I should've been here." He sits his cup on the table with a sigh. "I won't be out long tonight." He put his coat on as I stood at the stairs.

"I've been told that before." I joke with a big yawn.

He chuckles at me while putting his cap on, and walking closer to me.

"I mean it this time. I know you stay up when you know you should be sleeping." I couldn't help looking down when my face started to burn from his playful scolding.

''I just know sometimes your work is dangerous, and it helps to know you got back." I mumble.

I almost jump out of my skin when I feel his hand move over my shoulder to run my thumb along my cheek. I look up to him closer than before. We lean against the banister of the stairs as he deeply kisses me. I hold onto his waist to keep him close, but we are pulled away from a small giggle.

"Bed, young lady." I call up to Katie who's somewhat hiding in the doorway of her room.

When I look back to John he's smirking at me, and with a quick kiss he walks out. I sigh while I walk up the stairs, putting Kate back to bed, and getting ready for bed myself. I change into my nightgown, roll the ends of my hair, and grab the book I've been reading. I'm halfway through my chapter when I hear the door downstairs close, and footsteps coming up the stairs. With quick quiet movements I grab my revolver to stand at the opening of the door that faces the top of the stairs perfectly. Once I see the top of the person's head I load the gun. They stop at the sound of the click, and raise their hands.

"It's only me, love." John chuckles.

"Sorry I didn't know you'd be back this soon." I put the gun away as he walks in behind me.

"I couldn't stop thinking about something." He stalks toward me as he smirks.

I slowly sit down as I keep eye contact with him. He kisses me with his hands on my thighs, and follows me as I lay back. We throw his clothes around the room as we feel each other's body, and once it comes to my nightgown he slowly runs his hands up my body. He groans when he sees I don't have anything under the gown. I wrap my legs around his waist to pull him closer, and to feel him rub against me.

"John please." I moan into his shoulder.

Once he enters me he hits the hilt, stopping for a moment to kiss me deeply, and let me relax a little. Before he starts moving he grabs the metal headboard to stop it from hitting the wall. The way I could feel every inch of him as he would vigorously pound away. I had to bite his shoulder to stop myself from moaning out, but I would whine out when he would grind a way that sent a shock through my body. With a loud groan and a muffled scream we finish together, and fall onto the bed.

That night changed a lot about how John would act around the house. He would come around a lot more, he told the kids that I wasn't the nanny anymore that I was his girlfriend. Katie kept telling him she knew he liked me, and that he waited so long. Of course I ended up pregnant not long after, and he proposed. Once I became too pregnant, the kids and I had to stay with Ada for our own protection. John still was able to make it to see his little girl, Diana, to be born.

[midnighticee]

finished my jacket for TFcon!

[sootwilb]

WARNING SUPER LONG ASK AHEAD!

How many other people believe this whole situation between Wilbur and Shelby is being blown WAY out of proportion? I believe it's being blown out of proportion a bit on both sides, but I just see an overwhelming amount of hate on one side, and it isn't Wilbur's. Not to say no hate toward Shelby exists, it does, but I keep seeing people attacking Wilbur. (Not to excuse those attacking Shelby, they should stop as well).

Like the extreme dehumanization towards Wilbur, calling him a drug addict, all the muzzles' posts and edits, people calling or comparing him to a dog or animal because of his biting habit –

Mini-rant: Wilbur's biting is akin to atypical affection or a stim and he does it out of affection. It is not a kink. So to characterize it as something sexual, to be controlling, do deliberate harm, as a targeted or calculated thing is extremely absurd. Everyone shows affection/intimacy in different ways. Also to draw muzzles or comparisons to an animal (I believe) is extremely dehumanizing for those who also bite (for similar or different reasons).

– people have edited self-harm on him, people post gore under WSS posts - like that guy shooting himself, there have been rumors of people sharing what they believe to be CP of Wilbur (if true, WTF is wrong with them) wishing for death and sending numerous threats to Wilbur and those who still like him or support him. 

A majority just dehumanizes, bullies, and victimizes others all while claiming to support victims without actually supporting the victim. I don't believe those who participate in this behavior care about victims, they just want to be lauded as a good person or a hero without actually having to do anything. They don't watch Shelby stream nor have I seen them do anything that would actually help victims - like talk about signs of abuse, different kinds/types of abuse, how to spot them, how to get out of those abusive situations nor support or bring up and charities that help abuse victims (But as far as I'm aware, I haven't seen Shelby do this either) all I’ve seen is just overwhelming hatred for one man. What they’re really saying is “Everyone! Look at me! I'm on the right side! I’m normal and good, the cop of life! Give me praise and admiration! Ruin this man's life so that I may become famous!” 

Like… All of this over Wilbur consensually biting his older girlfriend. Shelby said herself that the biting was consensual and that she didn't know how to properly use the safeword until recently. (Like within the last few months, I believe).

Is it bad that I struggle to believe Shelby is completely unaware of what people are saying about Wilbur? Especially if she is supposedly lurking in WSS or LVJY spaces with that ‘stream my stream instead’ when people were streaming ILGWIS. I mean, if it's also true that she liked posts saying Wilbur should be in a muzzle and that he should join the 27 Club back in February or early March then by god I’d expect more maturity from someone in their thirties. 

You can disagree with me on this. I was raised with the belief that you are responsible for your actions (or lack thereof) and you are responsible for yourself at the end of the day because there won't always be people around to help you. If you put yourself in a bad situation and keep putting yourself !!KNOWINGLY!! back in that situation, it is your job to get yourself out of it. 

– This doesn't apply to those who are genuinely trapped whether because they live with them, (like with parents, siblings, other relatives, or spouses) have legal or other types of obligations, (like marriage or children) are blackmailed or forced into the situation by others, (like arranged marriages) or in financial abuse situations where they can't afford to leave. (Not paying for a cat sitter, plane ticket, or their side of the food is not financial abuse) – 

Wilbur's biting habit was extremely well-known, he told her that he wasn't going to change, plus in Lexi's stream, she said she saw/knew about the red flags and decided not to tell anyone and stay in the relationship. Shelby is a grown woman who is older than Wilbur and has been in multiple relationships. I don't know if she thought she could change or fix him - which ladies and gentlemen if you're in a relationship thinking “I can change them” or “I can fix them” - break up. Because starting or continuing a relationship with that “I can fix them” mentally is not a healthy or a good foundation for ANY relationship.

Personally, I believe the relationship was dysfunctional, mutually toxic, and rifled with miscommunications and misunderstandings between the both of them that couldn't be fixed.

well said nonnie! it annoys me so much when people call his biting habit a kink. shelby literally says herself that he did it to show affection, he does it to both partners and friends and he’s done it since childhood.

the way people talk about wilbur and dehumanise him is online harassment and online harassment is abuse, those people who constantly wish him to die or want him to be hurt they are no better than who they think he is but they think that because he has the label abuser on him that they are morally right to behave in that way. ive started calling those people antis/haters because that’s what they are they couldn’t give a crap about shelby.

wilbur has consistently been the more mature one despite the fact that she is older than him and has been a public figure far longer than he has.

i definitely think she went into the relationship thinking she could fix him considering his struggle with mental health has never been hidden. i also agree that it was mutually toxic and that there were massive issues with communication from both of them

[mysticalsoot]

Everyone’s like going crazy about everything going on with Wilbur and Shelby but the thing is, and this is aimed at people that say “i always knew that—“ How would you know? Do you know them without the personas they put up for you online? Have you seen them without them knowing cameras were around? (Hopefully not, that sounds weird.)

E.g.

“Wilbur always acted kind of weird”

And you know that, how? Because his persona was like that? People need to understand that you do not know these people neither do they know you. They have online personas. How they act online/in front of an audience is not how they act in real life privately.

“Shelby and Wilbur were close on camera!!”

On camera. A good reference would be family pictures. You know how you take like birthday pictures and it’s always awkward that you have to smile so that it looks like you’re happy in the picture? Thats almost basically what a persona is, you’re acting a certain way so that others that see content with you acting that way think you are that way and act like that naturally even without cameras.

But yeah, my point is that people need to stop assuming that “they knew” when three (?) days ago Wilbur was literally their favourite person ever.

no one knows the definite answer. no one. no one could have known shit.

we still don't know much of anything.

I can't find the vod anywhere, I cannot find clips that are evidence of what was said. i cannot find what SHELBY said. all I've heard is what has been told to me by people harassing me in my asks, and what I've seen on Twitter.

it was never confirmed they dated, and if we function under the assumption they did there is more to it than we are being told. much. much more.

I am saying this as an abuse victim myself. as someone who's been a victim and had my abusers friends (including mine, aside from one) turn against me because of what had been said, because of how they victimized themself. I thought it was my fault, I was 12 & 13. it was not my fault.

my experiences have made me learn there is always more to a story.

believe victims first, but know yourself too. if you start to feel like you're saying or believing something because you *have* to or are being forced/told to believe it, take a step back and reevaluate for YOU.

i respect everyone's decision, and opinions. they may not be mine, but I respect it.

sorry, I kind of started ranting, but I hope I got my point across.

reminder; anon asks are off, so don't think about harassing me

[toastyliltoasts]

The subreddit has been actual neutral people and other's who were trynna cope with this whole thing. I suggest yall check it out or just simply talk to someone you trust. This is genuinely hard for everyone. Give out love to Shelby and please stop trying to do this scooby doo shit to figure out who the abuser is. Pretty sure this could get people, Shelby, in legal trouble (feel free to tell me if not). Take some time off Tumblr, Twitter and the internet, you deserve it. Rants are always welcome (please do rant to me, im also in dire need to talk to someone about this)

[pogbur]

tbh i dont think i ever stopped thinking about wilbur less (the character especially) or enjoyed, for lack of a better word, content related to him/the character less since shelby came out about what happened.

like yeah i stopped watching the vods and stopped listening too the music and whatever. but like. im just as obsessed with him as before its just. im not happy about it (rant incoming)

like im insane about the character and i'll be honest hes still one of two or three people i actually find attractive (one i only realized like 2 months ago its very complicated and the other is slimecicle but only when hes cunty) but instead of actually enjoying the content and talking about him with friends and looking at his stupid face im mad about it

i fucking hate his guts and i dont care that its parasocial bc like swagever but i dont think of him less i just think of him worse. its empty enjoyment.

and like. i cant not. i dont have a replacement. ive tried getting interested in other things but nothings gotten me as excited as watching my first (and last) tntduo wine stream or learning about mcr coming out in the middle of class or celebrating a new album with my friends

and i idolised the guy. i acted like him bc i wanted to be like him. and i still do so so many of the things i did bc its something he did. even the things i did before that i liked even more bc i made me similar too him. the repeating things you find funny, the using pretentious words for no reason other than be a prick, the standing on things to be taller (im 5'1 so its not like i have a choice but whatever), even the things i say! ive never said prick before and its probably bc of tommyinnit not him but still. even the fucking manipulation. i do that shit. i dont like too but i can and i do and i can be good at it.

its just. GOD. sigh. swagever

[runnning-outof-time]

Hey, I love your stories so much, Thank you for your beatiful work❤️ “Did you even miss me?” With Tommy as much angst you can write maybe ?

Hi there, anon! Thanks so much for sending this in! I hope you like what I’ve done here! I tried to do as much angst as I could. Enjoy! :)

PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!

Part of my 3.5k Celebration — find more stories here!

Three Years

Tommy Shelby x Reader

Warnings: language, mentions of war

Word Count: 636

Summary: Tommy’s attempts to reconnect with (Y/N) don’t go as he hoped they would.

“(Y/N), wait!” Tommy called for (Y/N) as he hastily followed her out of the Marquis. She was still several steps ahead of him, the pouring rain not slowing her down one bit. “Stop fucking walking, please!”

“Why?!” she yelled back to him, slowing her pace down to see if he’d notice. Within seconds, she felt his hand on her shoulder before he spun her around to face him. “Why should I have to stop for you, huh?!” she asked, venom laced into her words as her angry eyes found his.

“I wanted to speak to you,” he answered her, keeping his voice level. He had no right to be angry.

“Speak to me? You finally want to do that?” her response was spoken in an incredulous manner. Tommy opened his mouth to speak, but she continued before he was able to. “Why the fuck did you even come to this pub? It’s one of the few that I can go to; where I know I won’t see you. But now you’re here, and you’re in my fucking face, and you’ve ruined my night!” she went on with her rant, her voice raising with each word she spoke. She didn’t care that she was screaming in the middle of the street though. This was what he deserved.

“(Y/N), listen…”

“No,” she shook her head, cutting him off again, “no, I’m not going to listen to you, Tommy. You lost your chance to speak when you didn’t come to visit me for three-fucking-years. I wrote to you, I worried about you every single day when you were in France, and then the war ended and I got nothing.” She paused a moment, taking a deep breath in hopes to stop her lungs from burning. Her angry eyes found his again, and she stared into them for a moment before asking the question that was burning in her mind: “did you even miss me?”

Every planned answer that Tommy was stacking up in his mind vanished after hearing her final five words. He opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out, and instead he stood there like a fool, his brows scrunched together and jaw slack as he let everything she just said sink in.

“You know what, I don’t even want to hear your answer,” (Y/N) broke the silence, dismissing him before he even had the chance to think of a response. She turned and began walking away from him then, leaving the lighted vicinity of the pub so that she could return to her home.

Tommy stood there and watched her walk away. He was itching to rush to her side; to escort her home so that he could ensure nothing happened to her. But he knew that she didn’t need him to do that. He also knew that him doing so would probably make things worse than they already were.

To put it simply: she was right. Three years was too long of a time for someone to be gone for. Tommy had his reasons, sure, but those put aside, he still hurt her. He hurt the woman who’d been there for him right up to the day he boarded the train for France. He hurt the woman that his mind would drift to while he was stuck in the tunnels and trenches. He hurt the woman he thought he’d have by his side for the rest of his life.

And now he had to come to terms with the fact that she was gone forever. He shouldn’t have came to this pub; shouldn’t have asked around about her and then intentionally sought her out. If only he’d known better…then he wouldn’t have been caught out in the rain. If only he didn’t let three years pass by.

Tagged: @mystcldydrms @the-anxious-youth @cloudofdisney @look-at-the-soul @elenavampire21 @mrsalwayswrite @julkaamazing @evita-shelby @lilyrachelcassidy @notyour-valentine @shelbydelrey @theshelbyslimited @peakyswritings @just-a-blackhole @watercolorskyy @strayrockette @peakyduchesss @alexxavicry @captivatedbycillianmurphy @yummycastiel @dark-academia-slut @tommystargirl @stevie75 @lyarr24 @signorellisantichrist @zablife @anotherblinder @midnightmagpiemama @cillmequick @rangerelik @dandelionprints @letal-y-poetica @gypsy-girl-08 @insanitybyanothername @depxiety @raincoffeeandfandoms @dragons-are-my-favorite @youtifulsunshinelixfics @forgottenpeakywriter @cljordan-imperium @areyenotfondofmelobster @little-diable @thomashelbyswife @iambored24601 @shaddixlife

MASTERLIST

[chaoticevilbean]

Katherine x shelby x Joey headcanons if you will

It tends to end up 2 v 1 in most interactions. Sometimes it's Shelby + Joey getting into mischief or squabbling, sometimes it's them attempting to stop Katherine from fistfighting a zombie who she thinks groaned that her dress is stupid.

Joey usually cooks. He was raised as a pirate, so he helped out the cook a lot, if only to get away from some of the more irritating of his crewmates. Shelby preps ingredients, which she can do w/great skill as it's vital to being a witch. Katherine is no longer allowed in the kitchen the same time as the other two.

Joey has that disorder where you can't recognize faces. He relies on voice, outfit/hair, + general personality/vibe. He couldn't recognize Katherine as a monster-slayer until she spoke, + he relies on her dresses, her weapons, + her voice, primarily. Shelby is easier, as she's always wearing either her hat or Tortoise, + she tends to announce her presence loudly.

Katherine wants a pet, since both of the others have them. They are adamantly against her getting a pet, as it is likely to be deadly, dangerous, + growly. ("A pet like a bunny?" "No, bunnies are too soft to fight with." "... you mean fight beside, right?" "..." *walks off*)

There's been several reports of suspicious activities around Glimmer Grove. It is a combination of monster-slaying, unlicensed magic, + general piracy.

Joey is actually the reasonable one. He might follow the girls' lead when he doesn't know what to do, but he will drag both away w/all of his strength + powers of reasoning. He has selfish reasons, which means everything that he cares about (Katherine, Shelby, the three's lives) is the most important thing ever.

Shelby met Joey in the swamp + immediately decided to make several potions for him (mostly fire res + speed, bc piracy knows few bounds). She met Katherine + made a separate set (random ones to be fun. Then Joey comes to her in a panic to declare that he just had to pull Katherine out of the water bc she was fighting a drowned... w/a broken arm. There is a lot of ranting abt reasons to not do that, + reasons for every potion to be created + dropped on the monster-slayer's doorstep weekly.

Honestly, a lot of their lives is that. But Shelby also experiments w/potions, which comes with... explosive reactions. And then Joey tries the potions, or decides to rush off towards the nearest shiny thing.

There are many attempts to prevent theft. It does not always succeed.

All three are fashionable in wildly different ways.

Joey's crew tease him abt managing to fall in love w/a witch + a princess. His insistence they're both pirates does nothing, bc Katherine + Shelby tend to come in to do many witchy/princessy things.

Princessy things include singing while killing monsters, always looking perfect despite any state of health/injury, + somehow having a magical transformation btwn outfits.

Witchy things include picking things from the ground, putting random items in a cauldron, + cackling.

Joey once fought a bear bc it was standing near a buried treasure chest. Shelby fought a bear bc it looked funny at her. Katherine fought a bear bc she could.

Shelby adores chocolate, but can rarely get it. She confronts Katherine abt the boxes of chocolate that appear on her doorstep. Katherine says she knows nothing abt them. In honesty, she does! She knows Joey has been robbing several of the more prissy nobles in the lands. If it just so happens that he's taking their plentiful supply of treats along w/their gold... she knows nothing, honest.

Katherine has self-esteem issues, but is honest when asked + is best at accepting compliments. Shelby denies hers a bit, but ultimately lets the other two reaffirm her + accepts it okay. Joey vehemently denies having any issues whatsoever, to the point of Katherine tackling him as an excuse to hug him.

Shelby doesn't hide the relationship. She just, y'know, doesn't talk abt it. Ever. Except w/the other rulers, of course.

When they were pining, both Joey + Shelby came to Fwhip. Their reasoning? He was the only person who was courting Jimmy who actually "succeeded". Fwhip, being unaware of how Upworlder courting works, agreed he was qualified. Surprisingly, the technique of working together to create a pretty but useful item for Katherine worked amazingly.

Joey refuses to eat cake. Purely bc he isn't there to make sure it isn't poisoned.

Katherine once tried to have a pet pufferfish. It went missing. On an unrelated note, Joey seemed incredibly helpful the next few days, + Shelby gave her water-breathing potions to get a new one. She chose not to, instead getting a pet salmon.

Another unrelated note, Katherine created an aquarium for every type of fish except axolotls.

Hope this is adequate!

[skyland2703]

Honest Opinion: Who are the *worst* Pink Rangers an who are the *best* Pink Rangers? (Amelia excluded for obvious reasons~)

Hahaha excluding Amelia is valid I would’ve ranted about her for half an hour😂

Okay so the WORST pinks: (this is only in my opinion, I don’t like a lot of characters “just cuz”)

Sarah: THE THE THEEEEEE worst pink ranger ever. She’s dry, she’s a joke to “trying to represent” people in STEM. She’s selfish, she’s very bitchy and… just… I just don’t like her. And I don’t like how much ATTENTION ninja steel gave her,,, ONLY TO MAKE HER WORSE.

Syd: sorry but Barbie girlie girl is really not my aesthetic. Syd is also very.. bitchy. Yes she can take control when it’s needed but uh— she gives very stereotypical vibe. I don’t like her. That’s all lol.

Mia. Her entire personality is: “I wanna be a good mom and cook good meals for my kids” while simultaneously cooking horrible meals. And there’s no character development. Girlie is this a superhero show why are you— never mind actually—

Dana Mitchell. I don’t know why. I just never liked 99% of lightspeed rescue. I don’t even remember her that well but I think she was… boring.

Karone. Simply because I was pissed at Kendrix dying Q_Q

And for the BEST:

Jen Scotts. Of course. Best of the best. Of the best. I don’t even need to elaborate on this

I would’ve given the second spot to Amelia, ofc— but since we don’t have that liberty, 👀 I’m gonna put Vida in the #2 spot. I love Vida. Girlie really wins all hearts 💖

Shelby!!!!!!! SHELBY!!!!!! She’s a go getter she knows what she likes and will not stop at ANYTHING. QUEEN. 10/10. BEST GIRL.

Kendrix. Do I really need to explain why I love her because I just do she’s so wholesome and amazing and enthusiastic and smart and 😭😭😭

I’m gonna give this spot to Rose Ortiz. She was actually one of the best parts of Operation overdrive and possibly the least annoying character on there. I like her “quirky” personality, and I’m sure I had a crush on her back when I had first watched overdrive—

Thanks for the ask!!

Ask me opinions about power rangers~

[proudfreakmetarusonikku]

sorry to come into your ask box to rant about this but the way everyone's been treating shlby, especially certain fan spaces on twitter, is infuriating to me.

because ultimately we were never given confirmation that shlby dated anybody, much less when she broke up with this relationship we were never privvy to. and so to see so many people basically confess that they followed and condoned conspiracy theories about this woman who has talked about how harmful she finds speculation about her is beyond me. the simple fact is if this fandom hadn't spread conspiracy and rumors about shlby we wouldn't have a "suspect" in the first place. there should be nobody to suspect at all. its all so disgustingly disrespectful to her. ugh.

like, your performative care for victims ain’t helping shit. you can have your own private opinions but unless allegations are made all you are doing is violating the privacy of someone who came out as an abuse victim for your own curiosity. if shelby wants to say who does it, they can and I’d support them immediately. if s they don’t, that’s fine too. but like. you have to leave that decision up to them. pushing people into things violating their boundaries and snooping into their personal lives is in fact abusive. stop e-stalking victims because you think you know better than them. if it’s anyone who’s been speculated about, obviously fuck them, but also like. if they are, you’re doing a good job in scaring the victim into never saying because shelby obviously wouldn’t want weirdos digging into leaked info and stuff no one does and if it’s not any of them you’ve just accused innocent people of horrific shit bc of ancedotal evidence. supporting victims should never mean playing internet detective.

if someone tried to dig into my past to find the people who abused me or borderline groomed me I’d be fucking livid and feel so violated, this isn’t the flex of supporting victims some people think it is. like, even if there were intentional hints or whatever that was not an invitation to begin digging up old parts of shelby's past including leaked info and gossip site shit. have what opinions you want but like, also give shelby some fucking agency you dickheads they’re not your property bc they’re an abuse victim they’re not a damsel in distress stop immediately digging into their private life.