#show me your poo

[punmster]

being ace means i don't get giggly or horny about omegaverse aka abo but instead become painfully obsessed with details in anatomy and world building

[turnipoddity]

watched human centipede (first one) last night as a joke with my dormmate and im so surprised it was actually… dare i say pretty tame?

[unproduciblesmackdown]

meinnnn gott i was like boy this song can't be 8 & a half minutes....well the first 6 minutes of the video are phyllidia krampington loosing george salazar the krampus on everyone & their asshole (here her cousin, b/c although i swear on my life i have seen [phyllidia seducing the krampus via baby it's cold outside] photos, in this 2018 show that sequence is definitely about her trying to fuck melvin cooterstein in the ass. (note that she mentions the xmas villain's long-lost daughter harriet, as the [why are you so evil? / i don't kneauuraeaough....but it definitely doesn't have anything to do with xyz] but no long-lost presumed dead spouse, who would've been already mentioned in the 2019 show at this point though that's no incontrovertible evidence it's not relevant in this show. & my hypothesis is that if melvin is a long-lost anyone, phyllidia would be His long-lost daughter. but 50/50 could go either way! a beautiful relationship ft. the convenience of all these colonoscopies he keeps scheduling)) and then we meet the fancy tree! and don't get around to singing until phyllidia's exit & the krampus's partial sendoff to go feel better having some snacks (i.e., mingle & meander)

[icewindandboringhorror]

everyday I miss miitomo .. aaa

[poohwhin]

@kindan-no-kanojo pls dont mind this random tag after like millions of years but this thought has been in my mind for a MONTH and it will not leave

kinolett??? right??? right.

i have no idea if any of my mutuals downloaded hsr but i can NOT play this godforsaken game without thinking of kinolett 😭😭 every time blade & kafka come on screen i’m like “oh yeah kinolett but game”

[odxrilove]

☆ TXT AND THINGS THEY DO THAT MAKE YOU QUESTION WHAT YOU TWO ARE

pairing: txt x f!reader

genre: hcs/scenarios, fluff, bsfs/friends2???? ~1.2k :D

a/n: requested by anon! song rec - nouvelle vague by wave to earth.. also big thank u to val pookie @fairybinie for helping me out sm with these scenarios!!! happy birthday poo i hope u had an amazing day and i wish u the best!! love you lots :D

back to masterlist!

☆ YEONJUN

constantly keeping his hand on your waist. such an action may seem futile and unnoticeable considering yeonjun’s the one doing it, but it still makes you confused. yeonjun’s known to be flirty, a literal heartthrob wherever he goes. he’s also very touchy, easily hugging someone or putting his arm around their shoulder. but it’s only truly with you that he lets his hand rest on your hip, finger hooked into one of your jeans’ belt loops.

at first he started doing it at parties, after finding you in the crowd, arms circling your waist to keep you from getting lost in the wave of people. it continued at normal hangouts, laughing alongside his friends as his fingers fiddled with the hem of your top. then it happened when you two were alone, lounging on your couch while watching a movie. there wasn’t anything or anybody he had to protect you from, but he still slid his hand between the backrest and your body until you were practically glued to his side, his arm comfortably holding onto your waist.

you’re not sure why he does it; maybe to show others you’re not available– you are though, or to purposely tease you and make your heart skip a beat– something that already happens a lot in his presence. but one thing you know for sure is, it certainly doesn’t help your already weak heart.

☆ SOOBIN

being oddly protective of you. soobin is the least confrontational person you know, so it didn’t surprise you when he kept his mouth shut as one of your classmates teased him in class. that’s initially how you two became friends, him nursing your wounded fist after you punched the bully right in the nose for calling him a lanky nerd. 5th grade sure was wild. the following years, soobin tried his best to defend you like you defended him back in the day but again, he’s the least confrontational person you know. however, his best friend-instincts took over him when a guy tried to hike up your dress at the graduation party. you nursed his wounded fist after and the two of you became even closer. after the “fight of the century” soobin swore to himself he would protect you. at first, you found it funny, trying to stop yourself from blushing when he would raise his voice at whoever decided to bother you that day. you don’t really know when it started but with each new time, his best-friend protection act would slowly turn into something that held a lot more feelings than just platonic ones. the way he would look at you to see if you were alright, or the way his hand would slid into yours, or even the one time he called you his partner instead of his best friend. everything was slowly changing, and you didn’t even know if soobin was even aware of it himself.

☆ BEOMGYU

calls you his girlfriend. the first time he did it, you thought he was just joking around, trying to tease you. so you laughed it off, attempting to hide the way your heart fluttered at the thought of you being his actual girlfriend. but the second time, a week or so later, you were even more confused. did beomgyu think you two had something going on? did he find out about your old crush on him? you really didn’t know why he started calling you his girlfriend, since none of his other actions showed he felt anything except platonic feelings for you. he stopped after the fourth time, after he noticed your disoriented and clearly disheartened expression. weeks passed and not once did beomgyu explain his old but short habit to you. but then, months later, when you had almost forgotten about the whole ordeal, beomgyu did it again. to be honest, him calling you his girlfriend that time was in fact beneficial for you– you refused to talk any longer to the creep begging for your number. but the way the word rolled off his tongue, a hint of arrogance and a ton of proudness, made you reach for his hand, acting like the role he had assigned you. tension followed after, for weeks, and your heart continued to long for him. if only you knew you were the only thing on his mind whenever someone said the word “girlfriend”.

☆ TAEHYUN

constantly buys you things. it may seem shallow at first, but whenever taehyun brings you a small trinket or whatever food you were craving at that moment, your heart fills with joy. it’s not the way he spends money for you, but the way he looks at you when he gives it to you, eyeing you to see your neutral expression change into a happy one. taehyun’s a great listener, so he knows all your orders and favorite things by heart, which only makes it easier for him to empty his bank account for you. he swears you’re not special, or at least not more important than the rest of his friends– for whom he rarely ever buys anything– but he can’t really stop his brain from thinking of you when he sees something pretty or tasty at the mall. the dainty necklace around your neck is the literal proof of his favoritism towards you. he had given it to you on your graduation and you hadn’t taken it off since. it was a symbol for your friendship, he said, something to remember the many years you spent together, but the shiny “T” letter pendant made your heart swell every time you felt it against your skin. in all truth, taehyun was just waiting for you to notice the letter pendant of your name he wore on his necklace and hid, carefully, under his shirt collar.

☆ HUENING KAI

he constantly mentions you two in his future. you and kai have been friends since the two of you were in diapers and basically experienced all your first together. spending all those years together, in the same neighborhood, school and friend groups lead to many talks about your futures, sometimes wiping anxious tears away or doubling over from laughter at the mention of so many possibilities. it was a normal thing for you two, getting together and just talking about whatever would be on your mind at that moment. every conversation was different but one thing never changed, the way huening kai wouldn’t forget to mention you in his future plans. he would have pictured everything out, you two living next to each other in your own homes, working across the street from each other, adopting pets at the same time so they could be friends, meeting every friday for a ramen and movie night… whenever you were worried about what the future prepared for you, kai would comfort you, reminding you that no matter what happened later, he would always be there. it always reassured you but unfortunately, you never had the guts to tell him that you’d prefer to live together later, spend your work lunch breaks together, adopt a pet together, and turn every night into a movie marathon.

taglist: @0x1lovebot @fairybinie @blaqpinksthetic @odetoyeonjun @pockyandme @soobin-chois @lolalee24 @soobisms @junityy @kaimal @laylasbunbunny @jaeyunverse @enhacolor @honglynights @starry-mins @bibinnieposts @raevyng @yoonzin0 @tyunni @pointlessapple @yyx2 @pearlygraysky @angelyeo-hyj

please do not copy, repost or steal any of my work. all content belongs to @odxrilove

[newtkive]

shift shenanigans - s1 social media au

note: jus for fun ! may or may not do more parts.

warnings: crude humor, slightly offensive jokes from richie sry

part two

liked by syd_adamu, marcus.brooks11 and 30 others

chefboyardee: my friends! i love my friends! the two on the right more than the left (i’m joking i promise) 😁😁😁😁

see all 8 comments

syd_adamu: brave of you to call him your friend y/n

↳ chefboyardee: boss man carmy save me

↳ syd_adamu: oh.. :///

marcus.brooks11: you did me so dirty, friend.

↳ chefboyardee: love you marcus you look spectacular

↳ marcus.brooks11: don’t start

richietheking: Where am I?

↳ chefboyardee: ya motha

liked by syd_adamu, chefboyardee and 10 others

richietheking: Getting sh$!t done.

see all 8 comments

marcus.brooks11: This is coolllddd.

↳ richietheking: You already know it man.

syd_adamu: this is actually crazy

carmyberzatto: can you show this on instagram? i think you should delete this.

↳ richietheking: Delete your life.

chefboyardee: come down to the beef for a number 6 the occy way 💯 the safest joint on the block 🤑💯we are 🔛🔝

↳ richietheking: Eyyy I know that’s right.

↳ carmyberzatto: please don’t advertise this.

WE HAVE THE BEEF 🥩

[ 8:25 am ]

y/n:

bruh im about to lose it. heads up when you guys get to work.

marcus: that catering order is about to be crazy

DO NOT REPLY: These white boards are stressing me out.

syd: we know, probably giving you ptsd from not finishing high school

DO NOT REPLY: Fuck you I did finish it.

y/n: oh i gotta change ur contact name richie

richie poo: ????? What

y/n: it was ‘DO NOT REPLY’ lols

marcus: valid

syd: real

richie poo: What? Why?! That’s so rude

y/n: cuz you piss me off

and you kept blowing up my phone yesterday

richie poo: You weren’t answering, and we needed help at the cook out.

syd: the one where you poisoned everyone?

richie poo: Fuck off.

y/n: when i’m off work, i’m off work.

marcus: don’t let carmy hear that, y/n

y/n: don’t remind me

syd: he’s trying at least, go easy on him. he really has great ideas

richie poo: You mean you have great ideas in that little notebook

tina: Never trust a broad with a notebook.

syd: hey! i’m just being helpful

y/n: do you guys think my ig post will hurt carmys feelings

marcus: it would make me a little sad if i were him, but i don’t think he cares

y/n: great i’m gonna cry now

syd: i doubt he even saw it y/n it’s fine

richie poo: Check the work chat. Cousin is in a mood.

y/n: oh great

tina: Help us all.

syd: be nice you guys

WORK

[ 9:15 am ]

carmy: Everyone, we have huge catering orders tomorrow to prep for today. Please get here as soon as you can, the earlier you clock in the better. Additionally, please be careful what you post on social media. I don’t want people to get the wrong impression

y/n: yes chef 👨‍🍳

syd: ok sounds good

richie poo: Cool it, Cousin. What’s the issue with the social media

tina: I use FaceBook. That not allowed now??

carmy: Tina, you’re fine. I’m talking about those who post work things on public accounts

marcus: facebook is crazy

richie poo: I can’t go private

y/n: he needs the likes

richie poo: No I’m disabled from doing so. Not sure why

y/n: liar

richie poo: 😑I don’t like you

carmy: Then please don’t post pics of yourself posting up with a gun and an air horn outside of my shop anymore.

marcus: that pic was fire can’t lie

carmy: Well, it’s bad for business.

richie poo: Fine, whatever

y/n: carmy

carmy: What, Y/n?

y/n: is this because of my caption on my post i’m sorry i promise i wasn’t being for real

carmy: I don’t care Y/n.

y/n: is that code for ‘i care a lot and i’m crying in the office right now and that’s why the door is closed’

oh

syd: ? why the oh

y/n: he opened the door and yelled no 🤨 but i think i saw red eyes

carmy: Please get back to work and I’ll comp a meal for you later

y/n: OMG yes chef 😍

richie poo: Inappropriate emojis and you shouldn’t have to incentivize her to work

y/n: shut up acting like HR i’m gonna beat your ass

jealousy is ugly which is why you have that mug on your face

carmy: Stop

y/n: yes chef 👨‍🍳

i heard your giggle tho

richie poo: Again with the schizo episode

syd: you can’t say that richie

richie poo: Oh sorry

[ctrlchar]

hickeys with jakey poo

hickeys with Jake webber

a/n:Jake is obsessed with hickeys you can’t tell me otherwise‼️‼️‼️

he leaves them EVERYWHERE

if you don’t care about them being seen neither does he

he goes feral if you wear anything that shoes them off,even more so if you’re trying to show them off

if you wear skirts his biggest turn on is seeing your skirt ride up just enough to where the bite marks and hickeys he left are on full display

his warm mouth had left kisses up and down your body,praising you as he did such. telling you how beautiful you were and how you were all his . his warm hands engulfed your hips as he kissed up your chest. as he left his marks he would be sure to leave a kiss along with telling you how he loved you for what seemed like the millionth time but you didn’t mind.

he would obviously let you return the favor

he enjoys giving hickeys more rather then receiving however,he loves seeming himself the next morning with dark purple bruises all over his neck and chest

he had you seated in his lap,your arms wrapped around his neck with his hands right above your ass. your lips latched onto his neck finding that sweet spot you knew so well. he let out a low groan signaling you had found just what you were looking for. you began to gently suck on the area,biting it in the process.

he throughly enjoys teasing you by running his fingers along the bite marks he had left

whether this be in public or at home

his favorite place to leave hickeys is by far your thighs.

your clothed cunt sat right infront of jake,who was compenplating his next move,deciding if he wanted to give you what you wanted or tease you a little

he definitely went with the latter

he pried your legs apart licking a stripe up your thigh before kissing down and over your heat. he then went to the other thigh gently sucking a bruise on it,eyeing your expressions the whole way

100% gets off on watching your expressions while he pleasures you

[woso-dreamzzz]

Injured (Jenni's Version): Future

Grace Clinton x Reader

Summary: You need to leave

"Mami! Mami! Mami!"

You smile slightly, continuing to pack your suitcase as your son lays back on your bed.

"Yes, my James?"

He grins at you. "Can I come?"

You shake your head. "You know you can't."

"But why?"

"Because Paris is a long way away from Lyon." You add another set of pointe shoes to your bag. "And I need you to do a very special job for me."

You sit down on the bed, patting the spot next to you.

James is more than happy to crawl towards you, leaning close to hear his special job.

"You're a very responsible boy, aren't you?"

He nods. "I helped Mummy pick up Ollie's poo yesterday on our walk!"

Ollie's your family dog. Grace had gotten him for you when the first two rounds of ivf didn't take and you'd been so down about it. You were right in the middle of your third round and losing hope when Grace had come home with a German Shepherd puppy.

You called Ollie your good luck charm because two weeks after you'd successfully potty trained him, you fell pregnant with your other golden boy, James.

"That's very responsible!" You tell him," Because I need a very responsible boy to help me out."

"I'm responsible! I'm responsible! What is it?"

"I need you to be in charge of the house while I'm gone," You tell him," That's why you can't come with. You've got to make sure Mummy doesn't order takeout every day and cleans up Olivia's toys when she's done playing."

Olivia's the other light of your life, your nearly one year old daughter.

You didn't particularly want to leave either of them but you'd been called up by the Paris Opera Ballet to be their guest Principal for one of the shows they were putting on and you loved dancing in their venue.

Originally, you were going to say no but Grace pushed you to accept. She was more than capable of looking after both of the kids at once.

"I'll make sure Mummy eats healthy and cleans up!" James tells you," Can I go tell her I'm in charge while you're gone?"

"I'm sure she would love that."

James goes bursting out of the room and you take the time to finish packing.

Ollie whines a little as you zip up the bag.

"I'm sorry, Ollie," You say, gently stroking his head," You know I'll back soon."

Ollie's the family dog, technically, but, secretly, you know he's yours. He had been incredibly protective over you when you were pregnant with Livy and he had been super excitable as a puppy when you were pregnant with James.

Fully grown now, he loved being in the same room as you. He adored the kids and Grace, of course, but you had always been his person.

Frankly, you were getting a little worried he was lonely in the house alone all day so you and Grace had been in talks about getting Ollie his own puppy.

It was only fair to Olivia as well.

Ollie grew up with James. It's only right to have a puppy for Olivia to grow up with too.

But, that was a conversation for when you got back and after your planned trip to Spain in the summer.

It would be nice, you think, to have a puppy for Ollie to be the best big brother too just like how James is the best big brother to Livy.

Ollie follows you down the stairs, his favourite tennis ball in his mouth as you start pulling your suitcase down.

Grace appears at the bottom, hurrying up to swap the bag with Livy and carry it the down for you.

"Careful, beautiful," She says as you swap," You don't want to strain anything before you go on stage." She winks at you and you roll your eyes.

"Did James tell you I've left him in charge?"

"He did," Grace replies with a grin," I think he's already planning on demanding Big Bed access."

"Don't let him," You remind her but your wife just shrugs.

"I don't know. He's making a convincing case. Says that it would be cold without you and he should be there to warm it up."

"If you get him in the habit of sleeping in our bed while I'm away, Grace Clinton, then you're in trouble and I'm choosing what breed the next puppy is."

"Oh, come on!" Grace is laughing though so you know she isn't taking your empty threats too seriously. "Cab's here though. You finished up just in time."

"Okay." You pull on your coat surprisingly well for someone balancing a baby in the other arm.

You litter kisses all over Livy's face as Grace calls James to the door.

"I'll miss you, Mami," He tells you and you crouch down to give him kisses too.

"I'll miss you too, James," You say," I love you, baby."

"Love you too."

He curls into your arms and your rock him side to side softly before pulling away.

"Remember, you're in charge, okay? So I want you to boss around Mummy and make her eat healthy, deal?"

He nods. "Deal."

"I'll see you in a week, amor," You tell Grace, pecking her lips a few times and laughing when she tries to chase your kiss each time.

"Love you, beautiful."

"Love you too."

[kbspangler]

This is the public statement from @alepresser and myself which went up at Webtoons tonight.

Now for some ranting. Just from me, not from Ale—she's innocent of the art crimes I've committed in the past, and boy howdy have I committed art crimes.

This is the first page of my first webcomic, A Girl and Her Fed. I started this thing back in 2006. (I don't actually need a head count of those reading this who weren't yet born in 2006. I'm sure you're delightful and I wish you well in college.)

And this is the last page I drew in early 2020 before I turned art duties over to Dr. Beer. It's better, right?

Well, these days, A Girl and Her Fed has pages like this:

I drew this comic for fourteen fucking years because it's a story I wanted to tell, and I thought webcomics were the perfect format for it. I didn't know how to draw. I got better through sheer obstinate perseverance and sticking to deadlines as best I could for, again, fourteen fucking years. I sought out a replacement artist when I ran into time constraints and couldn't do art plus writing anymore; I'm a much better writer than an artist, so I had no problems whatsoever kicking art to the curb.

The first time Ale sent me art that would go up on the website—art I hadn't needed to draw myself—I literally cried in relief because I had been grinding myself down for, yet again, fourteen fucking years.

So when I read comments from people who say they want to make a webcomic but can't draw themselves and therefore need to resort to AI, that little line between my eyes gets dangerously deep.

This isn't like I'm some old dude who's bitching over student loans getting cancelled after making regular payments. This is me, someone who threw raw art onto the internet like a monkey hurling fresh poo, because I wanted to make a webcomic and the art is part of the process of storytelling via webcomics! I could've (arguably should've) hired an artist right out of the gate, and that would've been part of the process of making comics, too: a partnership between an artist and a writer is also something which grows and develops over time.

For example, after Dr. Beer and I spent two years working on AGAHF, we decided we enjoyed our partnership so much that we set out to make another webcomic! It's great! It's got wonderful art and consistent storytelling! You should read it!

But turning art duties over to unaltered images generated by AI because you want to make a webcomic but "just can't draw" is, frankly, a bullshit excuse. I'm not talking about persons who are physically unable to draw due to disability—I'm talking about people who say they want to make webcomics but simply don't wanna do the art part.

Friends, if you don't want to show your entire ass in front of God and country, you don't actually want to make a webcomic.

Do the thing yourself.

If you're scared, don't be. Take the plunge. Set a goal of twenty strips and do the thing yourself. If you can already draw but can't write? Great! Write twenty strips, write forty panels, etc. You might surprise yourself. If you can write but can't draw? Great! Draw twenty panels and see what happens.

Whatever comes out of it, it's a thing you've done yourself. It's something new you've given to the world, no matter how big or small. Be proud of that. And if you need to partner with someone else to make your comic dreams work? You can do that, too! It's still a thing you've done yourself, and many projects are stronger when done together.

...but maaaaaaaaaybe hire that partner before you've busted your own ass for fourteen fucking years. That one's on me.

[bloodibambiidoll]

Best Mates

(Fuck boy!Aplha!Eddie Munson x Bestfriend!Omega!Reader)

Summary: You’ve always been in love with your bestfriend, you never thought anything would ever come of it until you present as an omega and he spends your heat with you. WK: 5.5k My Masterlist

Warnings: 18+MINDI Omegaverse so generall a/b/o behaviors. Scenting, knotting, marking, breeding kink, unprotected sex, possessiveness from both Eddie and reader, pining, heartbreak, Eddie leaves reader after her heat so there some angst but they get a happy ending. Pls lmk if I missed any!!

A/N: So this is my first time writing both omegaverse and angst, so I was pretty nervous going into this but I’m actually pretty proud of how it turned out! I’d love feedback, and reblogs are greatly appreciated! Also shout out to my Lessy poo for giving me some advice @lesservillain (divider used is by @firefly-graphics)

Eddie has been your best friend since middle school and you realized pretty early on that you were in love with him. You remember the exact moment, you were both 16 when a senior cheerleader pulled him into a janitor's closet and he fucked her up against the wall. He told you about it excitedly, in a particular Eddie fashion but each word felt like a knife to your heart. He got the van a few months after that and it only got worse from there. If it wasn’t cheerleaders sneaking around with him behind their boyfriends backs it was band girls who heard through the grapevine how good of a fuck he was asking him to take their virginity.

He would always rant and rave to you about his escapades during your weekly Friday night hang outs and each time it broke your heart. But you listened, because that’s what best best friends do. You’ve had a few boyfriends and you were no virgin yourself but you hardly ever went into details with him and it never worked out because none of them were Eddie. No matter how hard you tried not to compare them to him, you always did.

When you were 18 he presented as an alpha, you graduated and he didn’t, so you hoped maybe he would settle down and find an omega but even if he didn’t at least you wouldn’t be around him everyday anymore to see it. But that didn’t happen, instead he kept fucking men and women alike, omegas, betas, it didn’t matter to him as long as he had a warm hole to fill. You didn’t escape having to see it either, he would take people into the bathroom after shows at the hideout, leaving you to ride home with one of the other guys. You would overhear girls in your college classes whispering about him, how big he is, how hard they fucked them, and it not only broke you but it just made you want him more.

At twenty one you’ve yet to present and at this point you’d given up hope of it ever happening. Your mom is an alpha and your dad is an omega so you always thought you’d present, but you were starting to think you were wrong. That is until today.

You were laying in your bed, your sheets soaked through with slick and sweat, whining with your hand between your legs desperately trying to relieve the pressure, even just a little bit. But nothing was helping, you even tried to use your toy which you quickly learned was a mistake, the vibrations too much for your sensitive clit. You considered calling Eddie, more than once, even going as far as to pull up his contact on your phone before talking yourself out of it. You didn’t want him like this, not just because he felt obligated to help you but because you wanted him to want you because you were you. That’s all you ever wanted.

He had texted you several times, and called twice but you couldn’t bring it in yourself to answer him. He would know something was off with you immediately and wouldn’t believe you if you lied. You felt hopeless as you rolled around in your bed, the only thing that offered you any sort of comfort was the flannel he had left at your house last week. You hugged it tight to your body, the bottom half clenched between your thighs, the other end held up to your nose as you inhaled his scent.

You were half drifted off, still clutching his flannel for dear life when you heard a knock on your door. You groaned, rolling over and deciding to ignore it, there was no way you could answer the door like this. You ditched your tank top and panties hours ago, your hair is all over the place from rolling around in your sweat, and most of all you physically don’t feel like you can move right now. That plan was quickly thrown out the window when you heard it again, this time it wasn’t just a knock though, someone was pounding on your door.

You didn't have to wonder who it was for long, his voice yelling out your name as the loud knocks persisted. Why the fuck was he here? You knew he had plans tonight so you figured he wouldn’t notice you hadn’t replied until later. It only made you want to ignore it more, you couldn’t face him, not like this.

“Open this fucking door or I’m going to break it down!! I know you’re in there I can smell you!”

Fuck. You didn’t even think about the fact that he could probably smell your heat, even from where he was. You wanted to ignore him, let him bang on the door until he finally gave up, but something told you he wouldn’t. That he would really break down your door to get to you, and you couldn’t help the warm feeling that filled your insides at the thought of him breaking down the door just to get to you. You knew you couldn’t resist him, not physically, even if your mind really wanted you to.

You groaned as you peeled yourself from your bed, grabbing some soft cotton panties out of your drawer and throwing his flannel over you without even really thinking about it. You felt dizzy and weak as you dragged yourself to the front door, but as soon as you hit the hallway it was like someone woke you up. You could smell him and the smell instantly brought the same kind of comfort as the flannel, if smelling him from here felt this amazing you could only imagine what it would be like to shove your nose in his neck and just inhale.

Suddenly the doubts in your mind were gone, you couldn’t even remember why you didn’t want to answer the door in the first place. You just want Eddie. Your pace picks up as you walk down your small apartment hallway and rip the door open. You smell him two seconds before your eyes meet and you feel like someone just knocked the wind out of you. His nostrils are flared, his pupils are dilated to the point that his eyes look black, the look in them wild.

“Why the fuck didn’t you call me?”

He doesn’t wait for an answer, just pushes past you into your apartment, slamming and locking the door behind him. He walks up to you so you’re toe to toe with him, he’s towering over you, staring into your eyes with lust and fury.

“I’m serious, why didn’t you fucking call me? I called you, you could’ve told me what was going on, you know I would’ve helped you.” His voice is deeper than you’ve ever heard it, that combined with smelling him this close makes you whimper and you feel a rush of slick drip down your legs, right through the panties you just put on.

“I - I didn’t want you to feel pressured to help me Eddie, I know you’d only be doing it because you feel bad.” You wanted to break eye contact but you felt like he had you locked in place without even touching you.

“Pressured? You really think I would feel pressured? You don’t think I’d come just because I want to help my best friend through this?”

Best friend. Hearing those words come out of his mouth right now almost makes you gag.

“I don’t know.” You just shrug, not sure what else to say.

It’s then that he takes a second to take you in. You’re wearing his flannel and it’s not even buttoned so he can see everything but your nipples, you have on these little white cotton panties, there’s slick dripping down your legs and your fucking smell. He’s never smelled anything like it, anything better. He’s scented and knotted several other omegas, but no ones ever smelled as good as you.

He inhales deeply, reaching out to rest his hands on your shoulders.

“Let me help you little omega, you smell so good, I can smell how badly you want me.” His hands run up your shoulders and rub over your neck, right where your scent gland is, and even just this simple touch makes your head spin even more. You want him to kiss you there. Bite you. You wanted him to mate you, but you’d never tell him that.

“Okay.”

It came out small and shaky but it was enough for him. He surges forward and crashes his lips against yours, his tongue immediately swiping over your bottom lip. When it intertwines with yours you moan at the taste of him. He pulls away, kissing down your jaw to that spot on your neck and your knees buckle. He catches you with ease, picking you up bridal style and carrying you to your room.

He tosses you on the bed and it causes the flannel to fall open, exposing your tits fully to him. Your legs are spread without you even realizing it and he can see how truly soaked you are now.

“Look at you baby, wearing my flannel, you have no idea what that’s doing to me. You look so fucking sexy and smell so fucking good. Gonna make you mine, my omega.” He’s not even really thinking about what he’s saying now, your scent and the sight of you so desperate for him clouding his mind. “I need to taste you.”

He lays down between your legs and immediately attaches his mouth to your clothed core, swirling his tongue over your overly sensitive clit with a groan. You moan loudly and arch your back.

“Eddie, Eddie, please please don’t tease me, make me feel good, I need you. I can't wait anymore.” He continues lapping at your clothed pussy for a few more seconds before pulling away.

“You want my knot, princess? Is that what you’re saying? I wanna hear you say it.” The people who you are outside this moment are completely gone, all thoughts of friendship and consequences out the window.

“Please please please, want it so bad.” You’re wiggling under him, your hips rocking back and forth in search of friction, you can’t take it anymore you’ve been aching for hours and your body knew it was aching for him.

“You don’t need to beg, sweet girl, I’ve got you. Let’s get these off…”

You barely have time to process what’s happening before he’s ripping your panties clean in half, bringing them to his mouth and sucking your juices before throwing them over his shoulder. He hastily rips the flannel from your body before tossing it in the same direction. He stands up momentarily to hastily rip off his own clothes, your eyes widen when you see him fully bare in front of you.

He’s more buff than he used to be and his pale skin is littered with more tattoos than he had a few years ago, his brown curls are even messier than usual and when your eyes trail down his body they pause at the little trail of hair under his belly button before stopping at his cock. You’ve heard rumors about it for years, you’ve seen it through his sweatpants more times than you could count but nothing could’ve prepared you for the real thing.

“Alpha, I want you inside me, fill me up please please.” You hardly even recognize your own voice anymore but you’d do or say anything to have him inside you right now.

“It’s okay baby, I’m going to make it all better, make all the pain go away, yeah?”

He comes back up onto the bed between your legs, grabbing them and placing them on either side of his thighs. He grabs his cock in his hand and pumps it a few times before slowly inserting the tip inside you. He wants to take his time with you, he really does, but he just can’t. He slams the rest of the way into you in one stroke, he leans over you on his forearms and starts fucking you at a brutal pace.

The weight of his body and the feeling of him filling you up so perfectly has an unexpected orgasm crashing through you immediately. The relief you’ve been seeking for hours brought onto you in mere minutes. He continues to pound into you, his cock hitting that perfect spot over and over again. You turn your face to run your nose along his neck and inhale his scent, the smell sending you hurtling into another mind blowing orgasm. He kept fucking you hard and deep, pushing you to the edge over and over again.

“Fuck! Eddieeee you feel so fucking - so fucking good, so so good. Thank you alpha thank you thank you.” You’ve been moaning and saying things you never thought you’d have the courage to say, the moans coming out of your mouth were sounds you didn’t even know you were capable of making.

“This pussy feels so fucking good, feels like it was made for my cock. Tell me it’s mine, tell me this pussy belongs to me.”

“It’s yours - it’s yours! Only y-yours, my pussy belongs to you alpha!”

He growls into your neck as he leaves hot wet kisses over your scent gland, his thirsts start to grow sloppy and you feel his teeth nipping lightly at your flesh and you want him to just bite down.

“You’re so fucking good for me, such a good fucking girl. You’re gonna make me fucking cum.” You feel his cock twitch inside you the same moment you feel his teeth sink into your neck, the feeling sends a warmth through your body you’ve never felt before and you barely have time to process that feeling because seconds later he’s painting your walls with his cum. The feeling makes you cum right along with him but the euphoria is short lived when you feel a stabbing pain inside you.

“Shh shh, baby it’s okay, it’s just my knot, it’s only gonna hurt for a second I promise.” His voice is soft and calming, a stark contrast from the deep commanding tone he’d had since he showed up at your door. His hand reaches up to cup your jaw, rubbing his thumb over your cheek while his nose nuzzles into the bite on your neck. After a moment the pain subsides and is replaced by overwhelming pleasure, sending you into a final orgasm.

“You okay?” He pushes up on his forearms to look at you and he almost feels like he’s gonna cum again. Your hair is a mess, your face is flushed, your skin slick with sweat, and his bite mark, slightly bloody, is displayed on your neck. He knew it wouldn’t take, since you didn’t ask him, but that didn’t stop him from imagining that it did, imagining you were his.

“Yeah, I’m good, I still - I’m still…” you struggled to find the words to describe how you were feeling.

“You feel satisfied but like you still want more, is that it?” His thumb runs over your cheek again and he leans down to rub his nose against yours, the gesture so gentle it almost brings you to tears.

“Mhm.” You nod.

“Well don’t worry babe, you’re stuck with me for the next week. I’ll be here for you, okay?” He grabs onto you so he can roll over onto his back with you on top of him. He lightly puts his hand on your back, pushing you down so your chest is flat against his and he can run his hands along your bare body.

“Okay Eddie, thank you…”

He kept his word and stayed with you through your entire heat, having one of the guys drop some stuff off for the both of you. He doted on you, fucked you and knotted you more times than you could count that it almost made you forget that he wasn’t really your mate, that he was just doing this to help his best friend. So the day you woke up feeling normal and he left to return to his regular life, to return to just being your best friend, you felt like he took a piece of you with him.

You hadn’t seen Eddie all week, which wasn’t that out of the ordinary these days since you both had work and you had classes. He’s called you a few times but you dodged them, only responding to a few of his many texts with short replies. Even managing to dodge your Friday night hang out under the guise of helping a friend with guy troubles.

But tonight Robin and Steve were dragging you to a party and you knew Eddie would be there because he asked you if you were going. You didn’t go overboard getting ready but you did wear your favorite little black dress and add a little more makeup than you usually would. If you were going to see him you were at least going to look hot.

When you get to the party you can already tell he was there. You haven’t laid eyes on him yet but the moment you walked into the door you could smell him. Even through all the smoke, bodies, and spilled beer you could smell his warm musky scent clear as day. It made you dizzy, it made you want to run. You weren’t sure if it was towards him or straight out of the party, you just knew you wanted to run.

You were one drink of mystery punch in when you finally laid eyes on him and you immediately knew which way you wanted to run. He was in the living room, with this beta girl from your English class pressed up against the wall. Your red cup slipped from your grasp and crashed onto the floor, the remaining liquid splashing all over the ground and your feet. You immediately dashed for the door, slipping in the liquid and bumping into a table that had a game of beer pong going on it.

The beer spilled all over the ground and the table tipped back and forth for a moment before landing back on its four legs. Almost every set of eyes there was on you, including the pair you wanted on you the least. You locked eyes with him for a moment, his filled with concern and something else you couldn’t decipher and yours brimmed with tears. You saw him start to untangle from the girl and took that as your sign to bolt. You ran out of the party and down the street, not even caring how you got home.

It’s been a few days since then but it felt like weeks. Eddie had called and texted you more times than you could count at this point. You had avoided every single one up until he threatened to just come over again to which you responded “I need time.” He stopped texting you after that.

You were on autopilot, work and class going by in a daze. You finally had the day off and Robin agreed to come over to keep you company. She brought snacks and you watched a few movies together. You were worried that you would feel different around her after you presented since she was an alpha but she didn’t smell any different to you. When you realized you couldn’t smell any of the alphas you’ve been around, it hit you, Eddie mated you that day.

When Robin leaves you’re back sitting with your thoughts of Eddie. What he might be doing, who he might be doing. You missed him and you hated it. You sighed as your hand subconsciously made its way up to the now almost healed bite on your neck. It had started to scab and show signs of scarring and each time you saw it your heart broke a little more. How could you be so stupid? You thought since you didn’t vocalize that you wanted him to mate you it wasn’t supposed to stick, but it did.

Once you realized it, everything started to make sense. The way you could smell him the minute you walked into that party, how you couldn’t smell any other alphas, the piece of you that felt like it was missing without him around. Eddie was your mate and he was still out fucking around with other people. It made you sick.

Your thoughts are disrupted by a banging on the door and the minute you hear his voice calling your name it’s like you're sent back to that day that he came to you when you needed him most. Part of you wanted to ignore him, let him bang on the door until he gave up, but the part of you that wanted to see him outweighed it.

When you open the door he’s standing there looking just as wild as that day but something about his scent is off and it makes you gag.

“We need to talk.” He looks and sounds pissed and it makes you scoff.

“Yeah? Why don’t you go talk to whatever fucking omega you smell like right now because you fucking reak.” You wrinkle your nose at him and scowl. Was he seriously pissed at you right now?

“That’s what we need to fucking talk about! Can I please just fucking come in?” He can tell you’re about to argue with him further so he just walks past you, leaving you in the doorway with your mouth hanging open.

“What the hell do you want from me Eddie!? You fucking mated me and then you left me! I see you a week later with your tongue down some girl's throat and now you show up at my door smelling like another omega!? Asking to TALK!? Okay let’s fucking talk Eddie. We can talk. Let’s talk about how you’ve made me feel for almost our entire lives!! From the minute you fucked Allison in that janitors closet you’ve been breaking my fucking heart! Every single time you tell me about your hook ups it makes me want to fucking DIE Eddie!! But I sit there and I listen because I’m a good best friend and I could take it as long as you were still in my life! But then you come here, you spend my heat with me and you treat me like I mean the world to you, like your mate, then you just LEAVE and act like none of it ever happened!! I can’t take it anymore!! I can’t let you hurt me like this anymore Eddie I can’t!”

Tears are streaming down your face and your voice is cracking from yelling, you bang your fits on his solid chest while you sob. “FUCK YOU EDDIE MUNSON!! I hate you I hate you I-“

Your rant is cut off by him grabbing your face and kissing you roughly. You grab onto his hair and pull him closer, no matter how much you want to push him away your body betrays you. After a second you pull back with a fire in your eyes, and slap him across the face.

“Princess… baby, you need to calm down.” His voice comes out stern, matter of fact, and it takes everything in you to resist his command.

“Calm down!? Calm down!? You told me you wanted to talk, kissing me to shut me up isn’t talking, Edward!”

“You WEREN’T LETTING ME TALK!! If you just listen to me for five fucking seconds!! I didn’t fucking know okay!? I didn’t know I mated you until TODAY. I thought since you didn’t ask me to mate you it wouldn’t stick, it never has before, but you’re different. You are my mate and I think my heart always knew that even if my brain was too dumb to realize it!”

“So what? It took you fucking TWO other people for you to realize I was the one for you? How fucking romantic!!”

“I didn’t fuck them!! I couldn’t, okay!? After I smelled you at the party from across the room I tired to fuck that beta chick at that party to get you off my mind but I couldn’t even get hard. I figured maybe it was just because she was a beta so I tried to be with another omega and she smelled DISGUSTING to me, the minute her arms wrapped around me I GAGGED and I came straight here!!”

“You didn’t fuck them but you still let them touch you!! You went to them! You tried! When you’re fucking mine Eddie! Do you know how much that hurts!?” You try to push him back but he grabs onto your wrists to hold you in place.

“You’re saying all this but I can smell alpha on you, and all over this entire apartment!!” He’s holding your wrists to his chest to keep you close, his eyes are boring into yours and you feel like he’s trying to look into your soul.

“Yeah ROBIN!! She came over to keep me company because I was wallowing in self pity over your dumb ass!! I CAN’T EVEN SMELL HER EDDIE! I can’t smell any other alphas besides you!!” You struggle against his hold, just wanting to back away from his scent that’s clouding your mind.

“Princess… calm down.” He’s using his alpha voice on you again and even though your body wants nothing more than to obey his command your anger outweighs it.

“Take your clothes off and get on the fucking couch Eddie. Now.” Your voice is stern and matter of fact, your eyes filled with fury so he decides not to question you. Dropping your wrists from his hold, stripping himself before walking over to the couch to lay back on it. He wanted to please you just as much as you wanted to please him. At this point he would do anything to prove to you that he’s yours.

He watches with wide eyes as you strip yourself as well, walking over to stand over him. The look on your face is one he’s only ever seen a few times, pure rage. You looked like you wanted to rip him to pieces, it was honestly turning him on. You swing your leg over his hips so you can straddle him and he moans when he feels your wet pussy touch his thigh.

“Ugh - god you smell fucking horrible Eddie.”

The scent of the other omega still lingered on his skin and you wanted to rip it off. You glare at him as you grab his cock in your hand and spit on it, pumping him a few times before raising up to line him up with your entrance, immediately slamming down on him and inserting him fully inside you. You don’t even give him time to process the feeling of your warm pussy engulfing him, you just start riding him like your life depends on it, because right now it feels like it does. He’s a moaning mess beneath you, his hands gripping onto your hips for dear life while he watches you bounce on his cock, mesmerized by the sight of you.

“Tell me whose cock this is Eddie, tell me who you belong to.” Your hips are flush against his while you rock back and forth on his cock, his head rubbing against your g-spot deliciously. Your hands are planted on his chest and your nails dig into his flesh, wanting to mark him in any way possible.

“It’s your - yours baby! I promise I p-promise, it’s always - fuck! - it’s always been yours!!” You start bouncing on his cock again, using his chest for leverage to slam up and down on him over and over again.

“You’re fucking mine Eddie, my Alpha!! Mine mine mine.” You drag your nails down his chest before leaning forward to rub your nose along his neck. You felt a rush of relief when it only smelled like him, she might’ve touched him but she didn’t scent him.

Your hips slowed and Eddie took it as an opportunity to tighten his grip on your hips and start fucking up into you.

“I’m yours and you’re mine princess.” He’s pistoling his cock into you now, getting deeper and going harder than you could yourself and an orgasm quickly creeps up on you. He feels you clench around him while your cum coats his cock. “This is my fucking pussy, you’re my fucking omega.”

You’re moaning so loud you’re sure your neighbors can hear you, your nails digging so deep into his chest that they’re breaking skin now and your nose is shoved into his neck, inhaling his scent while he fucks you so hard it makes you whole body vibrate. You latch your lips onto his neck and suck causing him to throw his head back and growl, fucking you impossibly harder.

“Gonna fill this fucking pussy up, maybe I’ll knock you up then everyone will know exactly who you belong to. Who I belong to.” His hands grip onto your ass and he plants his feet onto the couch as his thrusts pick up, the thought of you with his baby inside you making him insane.

“Yes y - yes! Breed my pussy alpha! Fill me up! I want it I - f - fuck! I want it so bad please please.”

“Yeah baby? You want that? Want me to fuck a baby into you?” You whimper and nod into his neck but that’s not enough for him, he grabs you by your hair pulling your face up so he can look you in the eyes. “Tell me you want it, tell me you want me to fuck a baby into, tell me you’re mine.”

“I’m yours! I’m yours! I’ve always been yours, I want it, I want you to breed me alpha!”

The sound of you begging him to begging him to do the one thing his body is programmed to do above all else drives him insane. He knows you aren’t on any kind of omega safe birth control yet and the possibility of it sticking makes him absolutely feral.

“Mark me Eddie, I want you to mate me!” He looks at the almost healed bite mark on your neck, you both know he technically already did but he understands what you mean, understands that you want to know it’s happening this time. So he runs his nose along the mark before sinking his teeth into your throat.

The feeling sends you both over the edge. Your walls tighten around him while he pumps you full of his cum. A few seconds later you feel that now familiar stinging as his knot expands inside you. He grabs your face in his hands and kisses you with a passion that you’ve always dreamed of. This kiss feels like your real first kiss and it makes warmth blossom inside you. He pulls away so he can look you in the eyes, his hands still cupping your face while he rubs his thumbs over your cheeks.

“I love you, you know? I’ve always loved you. I just never thought I was good enough, never thought you would feel the same way. So I pushed those feelings down, and buried them in person after person and I know that’s awful. But please let me prove to you how much you mean to me, forever.”

“I love you Eddie Munson, even though you’re a huge idiot sometimes, how you didn’t see it is beyond me. I feel like I was blindingly obvious.” You chuckle and playfully roll your eyes at him.

“I’m sorry, for all the hurt I’ve put you through, I promise I’ll never hurt you again, okay? You’re my mate now, I’m only going to protect you from here on out.” He places a gentle kiss on your lips, just basking in the feeling of you.

“It’s okay Eddie, you’re mine now, and I’m not letting you go.” You lay your head on his chest and reach your hand up to tangle your fingers in his hair, running your nails over his scalp.

“You think it’ll stick?”

“You were serious about that? I don’t know, only time will tell. If it doesn’t, we could always try again.” He groans and you feel him twitch inside you.

“Okay maybe let’s talk about this later because my knot is never gonna go down if I keep thinking about getting you pregnant and I really want to take a shower.” You both laugh, the kind of laughing you’ve always done together and it makes you feel whole again.

“I love you Eddie.”

“I love you princess, I’m going to spend every single day until my last proving that to you.”

You giggle and nuzzle into his neck, it feels so right, being in his arms like this. It feels like home.

[blqstar]

main mha boys finding out their s/o’s tiktok famous

↳ featuring ; midoriya, bakugou, shoto

content warning: black reader, fluff, a lil bit of crack too, mention on y/n’s big booty and boobies 😏, profanity + slurs, not proofread (as always tbh lmao)

note: i literally just came up with this on the spot, i was so busy daydreaming, thinking about this lmao. y’all i promise a oneshot finna come out, im def a d1 procrastinator lolll

𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔 — izuku midoriya !

deku honestly isn’t the person to be on social media that much. really because he’s out training most of the time

but every time he gets the chance, he comes across videos of you

and when i say every time, i mean every single time lmao

edits, little clips of you from your original tiktok, even your own tiktoks you make.

baby, when he sees you in that video, in them lil black shorts and crop top

y’all his ass is DROOLING

he’s honestly a little flabbergasted but at the same time, he’s not. he knows his princess is absolutely drop dead gorgeous so it’s really no surprise that you would go viral.

he ends up following you after a while and decides to ask you about it, assuming that you didn’t know about it yourself

“hey , bunny , did you know you’ve been going viral lately ?”

“yeah , you ain’t know ? i’m surprised you didn’t know before , zuku-poo “

๋࣭ ⭑⚝ — katsuki bakugou !

i feel kats ain’t a person to have social media, so he shol don’t have no damn tiktok🧍🏽‍♀️

“wtf is tiktak ?”

“kats , it’s tiktok .”

“whatever the fuck it’s called, i ain’t gettin’ that shit .”

with some persistence and a little bit of ‘pretty girl’ charm, he puts it on his phone (he be lyin like a mug lmao)

one particular day where he’s a lil bored, he decides to go on tiktok for the one time

and the first vid on his fyp is…you?

wtf??

he watches you lip sing a song wearing his color in a orange sundress, accentuating your butt and boobs

how many times he’s watched it? yes.

nigga has turned into an all out simp

after he’s looked, he goes through your comments and sees tons of guys simping for you too.

nigga’s boiling now

“HEY , WTF BABE ? TAKE THIS SHIT DOWN !”

“how about…no .”

“DON’T TELL ME NO , YOU WEIRDO !”

this man is an actual diva sometimes lmaoo

⋆⁺₊❅. — shoto todoroki !

like deku, he isn’t much of the type to have social media.

not just because of training but because he’s not really interested in those types of things. especially tiktok

but once he heard you talking about it to him the day before, he went to see what it was all about. (mans is obsessed w u like anything u talk abt he wants to know about lol)

and first thing he saw was you in a little black sundress and recording yourself in the mirror, showing off your figure

baby boy blushed (hes so cute)

he went through multiple clips and edits of you, even going through your profile and watching your videos.

during this, you were caught in the midst of it, watching his phone from behind

“babe~ , are you stalking my videos ?”

“yeah ofc , you look so gorgeous . send me the vids before you post next time . wanna be the first one to see ‘em .”

[hansoeii]

Hi! Your art is awesome, but since Tumblr mobile search is poo I cannot find if you've made fanarts for Our Flag Means Death. Did you?

Have a nice day!

Oh yes, a lot!

Here's some of my personal favorites:

You can expect a lot more coming once season 2 comes out cos this show has me in a death grip, haha.

You can find me on Instagram if you want to check out all of my work!

Have a great day yourself!

[hansslut]

precrash gf lottie headcanons ⋆🪽

҂ warnings: a lil bit of nsfw at the end + lottie w a breeding kink sorry not sorry :3

LOTTIE REQUEST HII💞💞💞 anyways!!

we already know lottie cares and loves too much about everyone already, so with you, her partner? OH GODDDD this girl would move mountains for you

whenever you say smth n some of your teammates disagree she'd IMMEDIATELY get those eyes of a neglected poo and go "yeah but think about their point too why are you only focusing on what you want for this team" or just yapping abt how she wants equality for everyone in the team

always towering over you and looking down at you with that cute lil :] smile

can sense instantly how you feel by the look in your eyes and how you act and she always runs after you to help you :( ( whether it's by giving you a blowjob/eating you out or cuddles )

spoils you SO FUCKING MUCHHHH you could hum a song and her alarms would go 🚨🚨🚨

"that's duran duran,their new album got released a few days ago do you want me to buy you a cd?a vinyl?a personal duran duran concert?" AND YOU'RE ALL LIKE "baby....personal duran duran concert?..."

doesn't let you spend even one dollar, buys you food, clothes, LITERALLY WHATEVER YOU WANT

quite literally treats you like a queen/king/monarch ( LMAOOO )

LOOOOVES hugs kissies holding hands anything you give her

begging u to get matching outfits 🥹

your own bodyguard !!!!! if she sees anyone flirting w you at a party SHE SQUARES UP AND GETS ALL MEAN AND SCARY

onto the NSFW now...cough cough

buys toys to use on you <33

going together to buy toys and she shows you a pink sparkly dildo ( that can obv be attached to a harness ) and you're all like "you...you wanna buy that?" "yeah??do u not want me to fuck you with a pink dildo:( it's cute! see, it even has fake cum :3"

but oh boy when you get back home and she's pounding into you with that cocky smile....

pressing down on your stomach so you can feel how deep inside u she is 0_0

"gonna cum in there,hm? gonna take all of mommy's cum inside you?" and you're just nodding and moaning cuz how could u even give her an actual answer

CONCLUSION, i need her and who doesn't.

[chrolloluvr]

💰Things you do that make Mammons heart flutter 💰

Note: Female!Reader 🩷🩷, not proofread!!

Warnings: Cussing, mammons got a HUUGE ego but i love him🥺

Calling him cheezy nicknames. Things like Mamm, Mammy poo, big daddy (his favorite), MooMoo, sugar daddy etc. Its embarrassing for him, especially when you call him these in public. Because he wants to come off as powerful, but when you say these to him, it is guaranteed to give him a noticeable pink hue to his cheeks

Giving him an imnense number of compliments. Or in particular, purposely pandering to him. Lets say you compliment how good of a partner he is, or how he treats you so well. He will be taken aback by your overly suckle comments towards him. He knows he treats you well, but by you telling him just fuels his already large ego, and proves that you truly see how much effort he puts into you.

Wearing or using his merch. If this man ever catches you wearing any of his merch, he will be like a happy, doting 9ft tall puppy. He will say how absolutely irresistible you look. 'Jesus, y/n. Cmon, do a little spin for me, yeah? M'baby looks so fuckin' cute.' He most likely will make you wear Mammon themed panties around the house.

Wearing his clothes. Lets say he gets home from a long day of planning and saving, and he sees your adorable self, covered in his giant clothes, especially big on you, covering your body. He will go absolutely feral. He thinks you are already the most stunning woman in hell, but when he sees you in his jingley clown hat? He feels his heart beeting out of his chest. And my god, what a woman you are. He will grab your waist with both of his hands, and snuggle the shit outa you. And he wont let go.

The size difference. It. Is. So. Obvious. People point it out all the time in the media and on Sinstagram. He's probably at least 10ft tall, so your basically shorter than him. He absolutely lives for it. He will constantly tease you for it. And he loves that it makes him feel more dominant. He loves that you have to literally break your neck to look up at his face, or that he has to reach down to give you a smooch. He will put things on higher shelves, just to see you struggle and ask him for help

Speaking of so, he adores when you ask him to help you with things. Such as asking him for help opening a Nutella jar, all the way to asking for help unclipping your bra. It shows you need him. And that churns out a feral side to him. 'Babe whats with all the ruckus- ohhh your trying to reach the top shelf? You're so cute, always needin' my help' Sometimes, he purposely wont help you, just to see your precious reactions he is always so greedy and eager to see.

Carrying you. His favortite ways to carry you is over his shoulders, under his arm, and facing him, with his hands under your plush thighs. He loves holding you close to him, because I, ( along with other authors ) believe he is naturally cold. So holding you close to him lets him tear his walls down for a bit. You feel like a small flee while being carried by him. If hes carrying you over his shoulder, he will slap your ass, and listen for the sweet sound of your squeaks every time he does it.

Resting your head between the nook of his neck. He loves when you do this, and you know he does. Sometimes, you will whisper in his ear how much you love him, and how he is the best thing to come in your life, and watch as you swear you can see his eyes soften and look at you lovingly. You are probably the only person to ever see that from him. He also has a thing for sniffing you (which I get into in my future hcs), so he likes to smell your hair, as he grabs the back of your head. He would never usually be that vulnerable around you, so you must know his weaknesses extremely well.

Hearing you brag about him. He knows you show him off to your friends, as well as the rest of Hell. But let's say he walks into your shared master bedroom, and your on the phone. 'Sarah, I'm being serious. Mamm treats me well, stop worrying about me. Im fine, yes. Yeah he a bit of a control freak, but who isnt? I love him for him. Im not joking, no-' He is in utter shock. you are talking about him, and your defending him? Yeah, be prepared for a looooong night. He will never forget about you saying that. And he will never bring it up, since he doesn't want to come off as a wuss. You genuinely love him. The fact that you said that and you didn't know he was in your vicinity is wild to him.

If you look up at him with your big doe eyes. God, you better stop it if you don't want to be manhandled and praised. You just look so innocent and cute, and he just wants to come up and squish your puffy little cheeks like the gif below ⬇️ .His heart feels like it's running laps, but he wont let you see that. He keeps his cool demeanor, as he tells you 'Babe, you think that shits gonna work ok me? Really fuckin' smart arench'ya?

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Someone New 3

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include angst, pining, romcom tropes, and some darker elements later in the series. Some triggers may not be specifically tagged. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This fic will contain explicit content. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You’ve had a crush on your best friend for years, but you’re slapped in the face with reality when he takes things to the next level with his girlfriend.

Characters: Steve Rogers, Thor

Note: why am I so anxious all the time?

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

If Peggy’s party promised everything would change, the ‘yes’ you give to Arturo pays on that promise. Almost at once, everything is different. Your boring, orderly life is suddenly thrown into chaos. You have a hundred worries at once and not enough times; passport, visa, packing, flights. Not too mention all that you’re leaving behind; apartment, furniture, and... friends. 

It’ll be good. You keep telling yourself that, just like Arturo, just like Sam. They seem more excited than you are. You struggle to see past the grief of saying goodbye to the life you built there; the life you built around Steve and false hopes. It’s foolish and naive but it still hurts. 

And you’re scared. Norway. It’s far away. And you’ll be all alone. You survived college because you found Steve; you could stomach the furor of the city for Sam and Bucky, but on your own, what could you do? You’re not brave or bold or anything like that. 

It doesn’t matter. You’re going to work. To forget. Focus on the dig, don’t think about everything else. 

You’ve already lost so much. Steve’s busy, you are too. Maybe that’s good. You have to condition yourself for the trip. For a new life. A year is a long time. You feel like the newly graduated teen heading off to college, the one who walked into the wrong lecture hall on that fated day, the one he picked out and put firmly in her place; a friend, just a friend. 

As you sort through your closet, tossing fabric into one pile or the other, your music stops playing and your phone buzzes loudly against your nightstand. You hurry to pick it up as that noise makes your neck bristle. You hate it. 

You pick up without checking the display. You hope it’s the visa office. No, it’s Sam. 

“Hey, chicky poo,” he chirps from the other end. 

“Chicky poo?” You echo flatly. 

“Hm, you’re right, I’ll keep workshopping,” he chuckles, “so you’re leaving in a week?” 

“As long as my paperwork shows up,” you sighs and cross your arm over your middle. You sway as you look around at the clutter of your bedroom. “And I can get all this shit out of my place.” 

“When’s your flight?” He asks pointedly. He’s not subtle. Men never are. For years, you’d hoped Steve was being subtle and look how that turned out. You know now he was so obviously not into you.  

“Thursday, 5am,” you answer. 

“Ah, that’s pretty early to be hungover but it will be worth it.” 

“Hungover?” You wonder as you slowly sit on your bed, “why?” 

“You’re leaving us so obviously, you need a final hurrah,” he insists, “I’m throwing you a going away party. Just the four of us, unless you have any plus ones?” 

“Going away party?” 

“Neither of the other jerks are gonna do it,” he scoffs, “nothing fancy, promise. Just some drinks.” 

“What about Tuesday? Give me a day to recover?” 

“Wednesday works. Steve’ll be back by then.” 

“Back by then?” You must sound like a parrot. 

“Oh, yeah, the lovers went up north to look at venues for the engagement party. Too bad you won’t make it. I’ll have to drink myself into a stupour all by myself,” he intones. 

“Yeah, sorry about that,” you grumble and pick at a wrinkle in your pants. 

“Don’t be sorry. You deserve this. I’m so fucking excited for you,” he chimes, “you have to tell me everything. I want pictures of vikings and castles and stuff. All of it.” 

“Sam, I’m just going to be digging,” you mutter. 

“And? You can’t just go over there an put your head down. Go sightseeing, go out on the town, have a wild one-night stand--” 

“Sam,” you drone. 

“You need it,” he cackles, “it’ll be a story to bring home with ya. Make us all jealous with your wild Norwegian adventure. Hey,” he pauses and sucks his teeth, “you’re like Uno reversing a whole country. Vikings used to invade others, this is your chance to go right in there and raise hell.” 

“You’re stupid,” you laugh and shake your head. 

“Never said otherwise.” 

“Hm, fine, Wednesday,” you agree, “if I'm gonna be there, I gotta get all this shit packed.” 

“Did I not say if you need anything? I can help,” he offers. 

“No, no, I got it,” you say, “really, it’s not that much.” 

“Right, well, I should get back to it and let you do the same,” he says in a resigned tone. 

You hang up and heave. You put the phone down and drop your head into your hands. You feel like you should cry. You’ve felt that tide of tears pushing on your eyes since the party but they just won’t come. All that tension is driving you mad but you just can’t dislodge the nail driven deep into your chest. 

💟

Your life is hectic but you’re not surprised Steve isn’t part of the whirlwind. Why would he be? He has so much going on. A wedding is much more important than what could possibly be the most spontaneous and naive decision of your life. Impulsive more than anything. Cowardly when you think about it. You’re running away because you can’t face the truth. Because it’s just easy to leave your emotions in New York. 

Still, you thought you’d hear more than this. More than a thumbs up emoji or hearsay from Sam. Even after your conversation on the balcony and his reassurances, you still feel his discontent. Will he really miss you that much or is he just upset you won’t be there to celebrate the love of his life? 

It doesn’t matter, does it? 

It’s gone so fast and you hope the next year goes just as quickly. That all this passes. Not just the trip but everything else. The sadness, the pain, the fear. You try to be positive. You thought college was scary and look how that turned out. 

Ugh, you’re really doing this. You're leaving is all behind. You’re leaving your friends and your family and your home. You have no one to blame but yourself. You could’ve gotten over Steve Rogers a decade ago. More than that. You couldn’t rip the band-aid off, you had to pull it slow so ever hair rends painfully from the flesh. 

The GPS guides you between the shining marquee. You can see the pulsing dot of your destination on the screen. You don’t drive towards it, instead hunting for a parking spot among the cramped lots and lined curbs. You should’ve taken a cab but you’re only having one drink and you’re saving for the inevitable expense of hurling yourself halfway across the world. 

You get out and grab your phone, your purse hooked over your elbow. You raise the small screen and get your bearings, squinting as you set yourself in the right direction. Just across and at the end. 

As you approach the bar, you stop short. This isn’t exactly the flavour. Well, not for them. You peer up at the neon light in the shape of a martini, a bright pink beacon, under which a large group of women cluster. Whoops and hollers go up as they enter and leave you standing out in the technicolour-tinted night. Did you get the address wrong? 

You check your messages with Sam. No, it’s correct. Strange. Maybe he didn’t know. 

You pull open the violet-shaded glass door and peer around as you step out of the way of the patrons behind you. You text Sam to check if he’s there already. You can’t seem to keep up with the clock hands these days.  

As you wait for a response, you glance around. It’s like a Sex and the City reenactment. The guys always teased you for your rants about Carrie Bradshaw’s selfishness. They weren’t much for the genre. With them, it’s sports bars and beers and what ball game is in season. They never notice your cute new earrings or your efforts to spruce up your work clothes with a flashy belt. 

‘Here. You’re looking cute.’ Sam’s response comes.  

You narrow your eyes and stand on your toes to look around. He’s sitting at a tall table with Bucky, the two of them looking out of place before the feathered centerpiece and glitzy wall art of high heels. You can’t help a grin. This is absolutely ridiculous. 

You weave through the tables and bodies, past the bar of gabbing girl groups and a few men mixed in. You near your friends and claim one of the tall stools around the round table. You use the bottom bar to haul yourself up onto the seat and hang your purse from your knee. 

“Hey, this place is... sparkly,” you look around with a dumb smile. You can’t help it! You never get a girls’ night. 

“It is,” Bucky agrees in a grit. 

You stop short. You look at him then at Sam. You didn’t notice before. They’re wearing bows on their heads. Sam has a head band with a gregariously big pink ribbon, whereas Bucky has a glittering purple bow pinned into his thick locks. You laugh and smother it behind your hands. 

“What is this?” You snicker. 

“We are your ladies tonight!” Sam announces and shifts to stand, bending under the table, “and you get to be queen bee!” He reaches to the floor and you lean to see the huge tote underneath, “here is your tiara!” 

He pulls out the plastic tiara with fake pink gems and white feathers. You giggle again as he places it on your head. This is too much. 

“Sam! How—this is so stupid. You didn’t have to do all this.” 

“What? It’s about time. Don’t worry about us. It’s all about you,” he snaps his finger and points at you, “we’re going to order girly cocktails and dish on the cute dudes.” 

Bucky shakes his head as he fixes the bow in his hair, “I wanted a flower.” 

You bring your hands down to your next and wiggle on the seat giddily. This is amazing. Your eyes sting and your throat locks up. You’re going to miss these idiots. 

“You guys,” you breathe. 

“No crying!” Sam claps his hand, “I already got this guy moping around.” 

“I’m not moping,” Bucky sniffs. 

“We have to decide who’s who. I know you hate Carrie so we’ll save that for Steve. He is the stuck up blond, after all,” Sam smirks, “I’m definitely Samantha, it’s already in my name. And you,” he points at you, “Miranda. The level-headed one who has to put up with our BS. That means Bucky--” 

“Charlotte?” Bucky frowns, “can’t I be Stanford?” 

You nearly gasp, “Bucky, are you a stan?” 

“I’ve seen some episodes,” he shrugs. 

“Well, that’s decided,” Sam checks his watch, “where’s that bozo?” 

You frown and look around. You look at your phone. You were just on the cusp but Steve is late. Bucky takes out his cell too and all three of you scroll through your screens. 

“Whatever, we don’t have to wait for him, drinks,” Sam blacks the screen and sets down his phone. He reaches for the pink pleather drink menu, “I was looking at the Paradise Punch. Sounds interesting.” 

“Mm, I’m just having one,” you state, “I gotta drive home.” 

“Pfft, don’t worry about it. You can get your car tomorrow.” 

“Sam, I leave at five in the morning.” 

“Fine, I’ll take care of the car. You’re storing it, aren’t you?” 

“I wouldn’t expect--” 

“Tonight is going to be fun. No arguing,” he points a long finger at you. 

The phone jitters and his phone lights up. He picks it up as your cell remains lifeless in a rare moment of peace, though it’s fraught nonetheless. You peek over at the empty fourth stool. 

“He’s not coming,” you utter. 

Sam huffs and puts his phone down, “he’s not. Peggy has a work dinner and he’s invited.” 

“Oh,” you nod and try not to deflate entirely, “that’s... that’s fine. He said he’d come to the airport but I wasn’t counting on that either.” 

“Asshole,” Sam sneers. 

“Hey, no,” you shake your head, “he’s busy. He has a wedding and all that--” 

“You’re going away,” Bucky surprises you with the emotion in his tone, “and he can’t be here.” 

“Really, it’s not--” 

“It is,” Sam insists. “How long are you gonna let him walk all over you? Isn’t that why you’re leaving?” 

“It’s work, it’s nothing to do with Steve.” 

“Sure,” Sam accepts hotly, “keep telling yourself that.” He cringes and swallows, “tonight isn’t about him. For once. It’s about you. Us. Having fun. Saying goodbye. It’s gonna be terrible without you. I hope you know that.” 

You could laugh at his rebuke. The conflict between celebratory and reproachful is amusing. You exhale and put your hands up. 

“Alright, I got it.” 

“Buck,” he gestures to the other man, “go.” 

You turn to the Bucky and he slides off his stool. He reaches down under the table and brings up a gift bag. Your mouth falls open. Your chest tweaks, a mixture of glee and guilt. You’re happy to have friends with them but you feel so bad for not seeing it earlier. For being so tunnel-visioned that you couldn’t appreciate them fully. 

“This is so—you didn’t have to,” you say. 

“We did. Obviously,” Sam scoffs, “don’t worry, my gift is the grand finale.” 

“Right,” you smile and accept the bag from Bucky. You push through the tissue paper and pull out the heavy shape inside. You reveal it and just as quickly hide it back in the polka dot bag, “Bucky!” 

You let go of the taser and retract your hand. Sam guffaws and Bucky gives a confused grimace, “you need it.” 

“What?” You hiss. 

“You’re going to be all alone over there. You should be safe.” 

“I... appreciate the thought but it’s a bit extreme.” 

“He’s right,” Sam adds, “you know, going to the land of the vikings, you can never be too safe. I’ve heard they like to carry women off in their boats.” 

“You two,” you roll your eyes. 

“My turn,” Sam says, “you’ll love this.” 

He once more searches under the table and the tote crinkle. He pulls out an envelope and you tilt your head. Really? 

“Money?” You wonder. 

“What am I? Your grandma?” He snorts, “here.” 

You take the envelope and turn it over. You pull the flap open and reveal a pamphlet within, along with a second slip of paper. A reservation... 

“I found this place over there. It’s at some coastal castle, there’s a spa and all that. They do like ancient types of treatments, hot rocks or whatever,” he explains, “I made sure you can adjust the dates too if you need. You just have to call.” 

“Wow, that’s... Sam, I’m going to be so busy--” 

“I told you not to work yourself too hard. That’s a good excuse for you to get your head out of the dirt. Literally. Just think of me when you’re in a mud bath with a glass of champagne.” 

You put the envelope next to the gift bag and drop off the stool. You open your arms to them. Sam is up first and Bucky drags himself to his feet. You wrap them in a hug and they do the same in turn. It must be an absolutely ridiculous sight but you don’t care. You tuck your head against Sam’s arm and feel a rumble in Bucky’s chest. 

“Sam, that’s my ass,” Bucky snarls. 

“I was just making sure you didn’t forget your wallet,” Sam chuckles. 

“You’re a moron,” Bucky pulls away and shoves him. 

“Peas in a pod, bud,” Sam lets you go as the hug breaks up, “now, I need a drink and you...” he points in your direction, “need a double.”