#should i just use my hands or get my bad dragons involved?

[call-me-pup2]

Still not feeling like physical touch for fucking, maybe a mutual masterbating session would hit the spot or you could just watch me 🤭

[ddejavvu]

anakin pulling reader over his lap spanking her and teasing/making fun of her for liking it and occasionally stops to rub his fingers against her clit to see she’s wet and he’s laughing and making fun of her for it, how dirty and how she’s so desperate for him oml😫😫😫

this post is 18+, minors dni.

contents/warnings: dark!anakin (probably), spanking, impact play + lots of dialogue about it, manhandling, pain, use of the word 'whore', mentions of a daddy kink but no involvement with one.

"This is ridiculous." Anakin's grating drawl reaches your ears, his speech pattern stunted condescendingly like he's charging through molasses, "I mean, this looks like a bad porno."

You're bent over his lap, fingers clawing into the carpet beneath you, and his flesh hand is working a tight burning sensation into the exposed flesh of your ass. He doesn't smack rhythmically, no, he smacks hard from below to watch your ass jiggle, then quick and rough from the side to watch his hand encompass a large portion of your flesh.

There's no predictability to his movements, and your eyes are squeezed shut, filled with glassy tears that would stop you from seeing even if they were open. You cry out with each new smack to your ass, acting completely helpless the way you let your limbs sag lifelessly over Anakin's lap. If you wanted to, you could push yourself off of him, or crawl forwards and run. But you don't- you were the one that asked for this.

"Is this really what you like? Bending over my lap and making me spank you like you're a whore in a video? Wait," He laughs, sounding evil and haughty, "Are you going to start calling me daddy next?"

He punctuates the accusation with a sharp, searing slap against the middle of your ass. You're sure he's watching as your flesh bounces according to his abuse, but he acts like he's so above you, like you're a sex-crazed playboy bunny archetype for wanting some pain with your pleasure.

You're expecting another slap but it doesn't come, instead you feel two rough fingers prodding mercilessly against your entrance. Thankfully, you're decently wet from the way Anakin's been bruising your ass, so there's little resistance, and not much discomfort even as he bullies his way inside.

"You're soaked." He judges, eyes surely scrutinizing the spread of your puffy cunt lips that he can see behind your ass, "This is really- pathetic. I'm hitting you and you're getting wet from it. Is that really how you wanna leave a wet spot on my pants? From being smacked around?"

You gasp desperately for air, grinding against his lap just as pathetically as he'd accused you of. When you raise your head to speak, to try and defend any shred of dignity you may have left, you feel a sharp pain in your neck, and register too late that it's anakin's hand having shoved your face back down towards the carpet. He keeps his metal hand firmly, steadily on your head, and you breathe shakily as your wide eyes stare at the floor. Your cunt throbs.

"Don't fucking-" He breathes like a crazed animal, like a dragon piping smoke from its snout, "Don't lift your head up like you're better than this. Keep your face in the floor. All you deserve to look at is my boots, because right now, you're dirtier than they are."

You manage to choke out a 'Yes, Anakin' without thinking. It feels right, succumbing to his power. Even if you could get out. You grind against his lap again, begging for another bruise.

"That's exactly how someone who gets off on this should speak," You can hear his breathing again, raw and ragged as he thrives on dominance. His hand lowers again, against the flesh of your right ass cheek to leave a burning mark in its wake, "And every time you sit down for the next week, you're going to feel this. And every time you feel this, I want you to remember that your pussy is leaking because I'm beating you up. Does that make you feel good?"

It's a yes and it's a no. It lights shame within your chest, but that shame is a candle that drips warm sticky wax down your ribs and into your core, which tingles anticipatorily with pleasure.

"Does it make you feel good?" Anakin repeats, louder, angrier this time.

"Yes!" You shout, giving in to the answer prevailing in your mind, the one that had come to you without logic's involvement.

"Remember that." He commands, and it's deliciously ominous as he plants another smack against your ass, "Remember that you get off like this. With your face in the floor and bruises on your ass."

[foone]

whats your favourite narnia book if you have one

Since I grew up as an autistic christian, I have many Narnia Opinions!

So, my favorite book for it's own reasons is probably The Magician's Nephew. I'm always a slut for worldbuilding and backstory and that novel is basically just only that. Some guy we know from another book goes on an adventure and in the process gets to be involved with the creation of one world and the destruction of another? kick-ass.

Best book to adapt? The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe. 1988 BBC version, 1979 Cartoon version, 2005 theatrical? All good, in their own ways. The BBC version is just perfectly 80s and the costumes are amazing (because they are costumes! they did all the monsters by sticking a guy in a big costume and I love it), the cartoon version captures the fucking whimsy of a story where SANTA SHOWS UP AND GIVES EVERYONE PRESENTS and the first person to offer any serious lore about the situation is named MR BEAVER. And the 2005 film has the big battles and CGI and Tilda Swinton as the White Witch which is... so much. I love them all.

But the best book adaptation is the 1990 BBC The Silver Chair. Hands down. It's got Tom Baker's Puddleglum, Warwick Davis playing an owl, 0£ BBC budget greenscreened giants (MULTIPLE TIMES), a group of people discovering IT'S A COOKBOOK and one of them being offended by the cookbook saying they don't taste very good, the bad guy turning into a giant rubber snake. a witch trying to gaslight some humans into believing the sun is a myth, and the ultimate salvation of Eustace Scrubb: a boy who almost deserved being named that.

And since I can't not list basically everything Narnia ever made, BBC's 1989 Prince Caspian and The Voyage of the Dawn Treader is pretty good too. It's a fun "road movie", in that it's an odyssey into a fictional Mysterious Ocean of Here There Be Dragons.

Lotta hits in that one. It's also got a "collect the macguffins!" plot where they're trying to collect the Seven Lost Lords.

But yeah, it's like... the first Island gets them a lord and they get to end slavery. Next up, Dragon TF island (The dragon is Greed... but it's also just a literal fucking dragon). Next, Gold TF island. Gold, it turns out, makes you go insane in your lust for wealth, even if you're already a Prince of a whole country. The gold is Greed, but it will also just fucking kill you because you'll be turned into gold.

Then it's the island of the ugly invisible one-foot guys and it turns out they cast a spell to turn invisible so no one could see how they're ugly but they're not ugly, they just think they are? and then it goes "HEY LUCY COMPARE YOURSELF TO YOUR OLDER SISTER" and she's like "I'm ugly.... unlike her. Maybe I should use magic to STEAL HER BEAUTY?!" and it's like, wow. Is there maybe a theme here about self-esteem in your appearance? and Clive Officemax Lewis is over there going I'LL NEVER TELL.

Anyway it's got the good line about how the Wizard in charge of the ugly invisible one-footed pogo-idiots is that how he eagerly awaits the day that they can be ruled by wisdom, instead of magic. It's a fun approach to magic: it's something that is a shortcut, a crutch, and it's a poor replacement for Wisdom, even when used by "the good guys". Tell me, Mr. FedexKinkos-Lewis, do you have any opinions on the complicated relationship between Christianity and magic? oh, you do? I never would have guessed!

They also find The Island Where Dreams Come True. They don't land there, they just fish a screaming man out of the ocean who is trying to escape it. The sailors hear it's The Island Where Dreams Come True and are like "wow, I could have my own ship!" and he yells no, you fools, not dreams like your wishes and imaginations, your actual dreams come true on this island.

and everyone agrees: Get us the fuck away from this island and lets never return.

Anyway I'm not gonna talk about THE ENTIRE MOVIE/BOOK but it's got a great weirdness at the end where they reach the end of the world (which is flat. It's okay, this is Narnia, a completely different world with different physical rules than Earth), and it's a waterfall, but a waterfall going up?

It turns out Heaven is on the other side of it. They turn around, but the anthropomorphic mouse is like "ehh, I'll take that journey" and becomes the Elijah of Aslan's Country, their equivalent of heaven.

Narnia, won't you?

[realhotgirlshitah]

Hii, love your vlog!!!

So I was thinking about bimbo!reader giving hints to Ethan about how much she wants him, but him being clueless, because he doesn't think she can be into him. Until one day reader loss it and says something like 'can you stf an fuck me?!'

If you're not comfortable it's okay, no problem girl, just a brainrot ❤️❤️

Thanks for the request anon, I’m actually a slut so I had no problem writing this! Unfortunately I am also a lazy slut which is why it took me a week to release this, my bad!

Hints and misses 🎀💋

Warnings: Oral (fem and male receiving) facesitting, subby Ethan, missionary, riding, Ethan is a bit of a loser but he is also a MUNCH because I said so and my word is law.

You weren’t really the “studious” type, and everyone knew it. Sure, you just about passed your classes, but economics? Yeah, that wasn’t your thing. Honestly, you had no idea what was going on half the time. So when Chad suggested his nerdy roommate Ethan help you out, you jumped at the chance. Not because you were desperate to understand supply and demand curves, but because you had the biggest crush on Ethan. There was something about his awkwardness that you found absolutely irresistible.

It wasn’t just that he was smart—like, really smart—but he was the kind of guy who didn’t even realize how hot he was. Ethan Landry was a virgin in every sense of the word and had clearly never felt the touch of a woman and it turned you on beyond belief. The way he would stumble over his words, run his hands hurriedly through his curls when he was nervous, the way his cheeks flushed when you got too close to him… it was all too much. You had been flirting with him for months, making it blatantly obvious that you wanted him. But for some reason, he never seemed to get the hint no matter how hard you tried.

And trust me, you tried.

Hard.

For example, one night, the group was talking about “types” during a chill hangout. When Ethan made a self-deprecating joke about how “nerds aren’t usually anyone’s type,” you decided it was the perfect opportunity.

“I love nerds,” you declared, looking right at him, resting your hand on his arm for emphasis. “Like, so much. I mean, smart guys are, like, totally my thing.”

Ethan gave a shy smile. “Oh, that’s nice! Nerds are great, right? They’re super focused… like when they’re playing Dungeons & Dragons or calculating statistical probabilities.”

“Yes!” you said, inching closer. “I love a guy who’s, like, super focused… and intense… and maybe even obsessed, y’know?”

He grinned, eyes lighting up. “That’s awesome! You should totally play D&D with us sometime. It takes hours, but it’s so fun.”

You opened your mouth, ready to explain that the only dungeon you were interested in involved a certain bedroom vibe, but he was already lost in thought, excitedly talking about character stats.

Or that one time when you convinced Ethan to go for ice cream with you. You wore your shortest denim skirt and leaned in every chance you got, licking your ice cream cone with obvious intent.

“So, Ethan,” you said, licking the ice cream slowly and giving him a very suggestive look. “Do you like… really sweet things?”

He smiled, nodding enthusiastically. “Oh, yeah! I love sweets. Did you know the chemical structure of sugar is actually super interesting?”

You blinked, holding back a sigh. “Uh-huh… fascinating. But what if, like, someone sweet wanted to… share ice cream with you?” You held out your cone, winking.

Ethan just looked at you, confused. “But we have our own cones…?”

At this point, you just stared at him, open-mouthed, while Mindy fell off the bench laughing behind you.

“Oh fuck you, Mindy, go suck a dick or something,” you glared witheringly at your friend.

“I’m literally a lesbian but at this rate, I have a higher chance of sucking a dick than you have hooking up with Landry,” she snorted from the ground.

You were sick and tired of Ethan not catching your very blatant hints. You wanted that man and TRUST, you were going to have him.

You glanced at yourself in the mirror before he came over, adjusting your low-cut pink top, making sure it showed just enough cleavage. You tugged at the hem of your skirt, smirking at how short it was, and checked your lip gloss one last time. You weren’t here to actually learn anything tonight. You had a much better plan in mind.

When Ethan knocked on your door, you could already feel that familiar flutter of excitement in your stomach. You opened the door, beaming at him. “Hey, Ethan! Thanks sooo much for coming over to help me. I’ve been, like, totally lost in this class.”

He smiled nervously, awkward as ever, and adjusted the strap of his backpack on his shoulder. “Uh, yeah, no problem. Economics can be a bit tricky if you’re not used to it.”

You led him inside, swaying your hips a little more than usual, knowing full well he’d notice. His eyes flickered to your outfit for a split second before he quickly looked away, his face already turning pink.

“Let’s sit on the couch,” you suggested, sitting down with your legs crossed in a way that showed off just enough thigh. “I’ve got, like, all my notes, but I don’t really get it. You’re, like, sooo much smarter than me, Ethan.”

He sat beside you, setting his textbook on the coffee table, his fingers twitching nervously. “You’re not—uh, you’re smart. You just need someone to explain it differently.”

You blinked at him, twirling a strand of your hair around your finger. He was cute when he tried to be nice. “You’re sweet. But seriously, I don’t get any of this stuff.”

Ethan opened his book, flipping to a page covered in graphs. He started talking about supply and demand curves, how prices shifted when supply or demand increased. You were trying to focus—you really were—but the way his voice rumbled softly as he explained things, the way his curls flopped over his eyes every now and then, made it impossible for you to concentrate on anything other than how hot he looked.

You leaned a little closer, pretending to look at the graph he was pointing to. “Mmm, yeah, sure. That makes sense, I guess,” you mumbled, not even paying attention to what he was saying anymore. Your eyes were glued to the way his lips moved when he talked, and you felt heat pool in your stomach. You bit your lip, completely distracted by the way his hands moved across the page, how his fingers flexed as he explained some concept you were completely ignoring.

Fuck he was such a loser, you needed him CARNALLY.

“And so, when the price of a good increases…” Ethan continued, completely oblivious to your internal meltdown.

You couldn’t take it anymore. You had been dropping hints for months—months! And he still didn’t get it. He still thought you wanted his help with homework when all you really wanted was him. The frustration built up until you snapped.

“Ethan, can you shut the fuck up and just fuck me?”

The words left your mouth before you even realized it, and suddenly the room was dead silent. Ethan froze mid-sentence, his hand still hovering over the page, his eyes wide as he turned to look at you.

“Wait… what?” His voice cracked slightly, his face flushing bright red. He looked so bewildered, like he couldn’t believe what you’d just said.

You rolled your eyes and grabbed his wrist, pulling him closer to you. “I said, shut the fuck up and fuck me, Ethan.” Your voice was firm, leaving no room for misunderstanding. “I don’t care about this stupid homework. I’ve been dropping hints for ages, and you’ve been completely clueless! I’ve been waiting for you to figure it out, but you’re, like, so dense.”

His eyes widened even more, if that was even possible. He stammered, “But—but why would you—I mean, you’re… you’re you, and I’m just…”

“Oh my god, stop,” you interrupted, shaking your head. “You’re smart, you’re hot, and I want you. I’ve wanted you for months. How have you not figured this out?”

Ethan looked like his brain had short-circuited. “You… you want me?”

“Yes! Duh!” You were getting impatient now. “Look at me, Ethan. I don’t dress like this because I care about economics. I dressed like this for you. I’ve been flirting with you, touching you, sitting as close to you as possible, and you just… never got it.”

He blinked rapidly, looking completely dumbfounded. “But… I thought… someone like you would never want… someone like me.”

You groaned in frustration. “Why the hell not? You’re cute! You’re smart! And you’re, like, sooo sexy when you talk about all this stuff. Do you know how hot you are when you start explaining things? It gets my pussy so wet all I wanna do is fuckin ruin you!”

Ethan’s face was a deep shade of red now, and he still looked like he couldn’t quite believe what was happening. “I… I had no idea.”

“Well, now you do,” you said, your voice softening as you grabbed his hand and placed it on your waist. “So, what are you gonna do about it?”

He stared at you, his hand trembling slightly as it rested against your waist. “I—I don’t know what to say. I mean… I’ve never…”

You smirked, leaning in until your lips were barely an inch from his. “You don’t have to say anything, Ethan. Just kiss me.”

For a second, it looked like he was still processing everything, but then, finally, he leaned in, his lips crashing against yours. The kiss was messy, nervous, but filled with all the pent-up tension that had been building between you for months. You moaned softly into his mouth, your hands tangling in his hair as you pulled him closer, pressing your body against his.

Ethan’s hands were tentative at first, unsure of where to touch, but you guided them, placing them on your hips and encouraging him to explore. His touch was hesitant, but it sent shivers down your spine all the same. He pulled away from the kiss, breathless, his eyes wide with wonder.

“I can’t believe this is happening,” he murmured, almost to himself.

You grinned, your lips brushing against his as you whispered, “Believe it, nerd. Now, stop thinking so much and just fuck me.”

“Can I- can you- please teach me how to make you feel good?” The way the question filled the empty room caught you off guard, you weren’t expecting your innocent friend to ask something like that! But the grin that spread across your face was practically sinister. You wanted this bad.

Before he knew it, Ethan was being dragged to your bedroom, still in complete and utter shock at how this was happening and how your clothes were already coming off.

You lay back against the pillows, watching as Ethan hovered between your legs, his breath shaky but his eyes filled with a nervous determination. He looked at you, clearly waiting for more instruction, his fingers trembling slightly as they rested on your thighs.

You smiled, your voice soft but teasing. “Don’t be so nervous, Ethan. Just do what feels natural.”

He swallowed hard, then nodded, leaning down until his mouth was just a breath away from you. His first kiss against your skin was gentle, almost tentative, but the sensation sent a shiver of anticipation through you.

Ethan paused, his breath warm against you, then he dove back in, his tongue tentatively exploring you. His movements were slow at first, unsure, but you could feel how eager he was, how desperate he was to make sure he got it right. His inexperience didn’t matter—what mattered was the intensity of his focus, how every little sound you made seemed to spur him on.

“Just like that,” you moaned softly, your fingers tangling in his hair, guiding him. “You’re doing so good, baby.”

The praise seemed to light a fire in him. You could feel him getting bolder, his tongue moving with more confidence as he began to lose himself in the moment. He was so eager, so focused on your pleasure that it made your head spin. His hands gripped your thighs, holding you in place as he licked and sucked at your core, his pace quickening.

Ethan’s breath was coming in quick, desperate pants between strokes of his tongue. You could hear him whimpering softly against you, his lips wet and swollen from the effort, but he didn’t stop. In fact, he only grew more frantic as you moaned and gasped above him.

“Oh my god,” you whimpered, your back arching off the bed as waves of pleasure began to roll through your body. “Ethan… yes…”

His response was a low, needy moan that vibrated through you. His enthusiasm was overwhelming, his tongue moving faster, sloppier, as he became more desperate. He was whimpering between kisses, his grip on your thighs tightening, and you realized with a jolt that he was grinding against the bed, trying to relieve some of the tension building inside him.

“Fuck, you’re so good at this,” you gasped, your voice shaking as you felt the heat building inside you. “Keep going… don’t stop…”

Ethan let out another whimper, his tongue working you over with renewed intensity as you praised him. His hips rocked against the bed, his moans growing louder, more desperate. He was lost in it now—lost in your taste, in the feeling of your body responding to him, in the need to make you feel good.

“T-Thank you,” he mumbled against your skin, his words muffled by the wet sounds of his mouth on you. “You taste… so fucking good…”

You glanced down at him, breathless and dazed by the sight. His face was flushed, his lips glistening with your slick, and his eyes were heavy-lidded with lust. He looked completely wrecked, and it only made you want him more.

“Oh my god, Ethan,” you moaned, your fingers tightening in his hair as your hips bucked against his mouth. “You’re making me… oh fuck…”

He groaned in response, his movements growing even sloppier as he chased your pleasure with an almost frantic urgency. His whimpers were constant now, his entire body trembling as he worked himself against the bed, desperate for release. But even as he lost control, he never stopped focusing on you, on your pleasure.

You could feel the pressure building inside you, the heat coiling tighter and tighter with every stroke of his tongue. Ethan’s hands were gripping your thighs so tightly that you were sure there would be bruises, but you didn’t care. All you cared about was the way he was making you feel—the way his eagerness, his desperation, was pushing you closer and closer to the edge.

“Oh god, I’m gonna come,” you whimpered, your entire body trembling as you neared the brink. “Ethan, don’t stop…”

He didn’t stop. In fact, he only grew more frantic, his tongue working you over with a kind of raw desperation that made your head spin. He moaned against you, the sound vibrating through your body, and it was enough to send you spiraling over the edge.

You came with a loud cry, your body arching off the bed as pleasure crashed over you in waves. Ethan kept going, his tongue relentless as he worked you through your orgasm, his whimpers of pleasure blending with your moans.

But even as your body began to relax, as the pleasure ebbed, Ethan didn’t stop. He was still going, his tongue slower now but just as eager, as if he couldn’t get enough of you. You could feel him trembling, hear his soft whimpers, and when you glanced down at him, you saw that his lips were swollen, glistening, his eyes half-closed with lust.

“Ethan!” you finally gasped, tugging gently on his curls to pull him away, your own body still trembling. “You need to stop…”

But he looked up at you, completely dazed, his lips covered with your slick, and there was a desperate need in his gaze. “No, please,” he whined, his voice thick with desire. “I want more… let me do it again. Sit on my face, please.”

The words sent a fresh wave of heat through you, and for a moment, all you could do was stare at him, completely dazed. He looked unrecognisable—his hair messy from your hands, face smeared with your juices and his eyes blown wide with lust. And yet, he was still begging for more, desperate to make you feel good again.

You smirked, your heart racing as you considered his request. “You want me to sit on your face, huh?”

Ethan nodded eagerly, his hands already reaching for your hips. “Please,” he whimpered again, his voice filled with need. “I want to make you feel good… let me do it again. I need it.”

The desperation in his voice was almost enough to send you over the edge again right then and there.

You could see the desperation in Ethan’s eyes as you teased him, and it only made you want him more. He lay back on the bed, breathless and dazed, his chest rising and falling rapidly, lips still glistening from his relentless efforts. His eyes tracked your every movement as you slowly climbed back over him, hovering above his face, watching the anticipation build in those wide brown eyes.

“God, you really can’t get enough, can you?” you murmured, your voice sultry and teasing as you dragged your fingers gently through his messy curls. He whimpered, his hips already jerking up into the air in a needy, helpless motion, like he couldn’t control himself anymore.

You relented, lowering yourself down until you were back on his face, and the second he felt you against his lips again, Ethan moaned like a man starved. His tongue immediately dove back in, more eager than before, licking and sucking with reckless abandon, as if he was addicted to the way you tasted. He groaned against you, his hands gripping your thighs tight enough to leave marks, pulling you down harder against his mouth.

You bit your lip, suppressing a moan as you started to rock your hips against him. The way he moved beneath you, the way he whimpered and moaned like he was getting drunk off your taste, was driving you wild. He was a mess, absolutely lost in you, and you loved every second of it.

“You’re so fucking good at this,” you breathed, your voice trembling as pleasure built inside you once again. “It’s like you were made for it… made to make me feel good.”

Ethan whimpered in response, his tongue pressing deeper, flicking wildly against your clit. He couldn’t speak, couldn’t even think straight anymore. All he could do was focus on you, on the taste of you on his tongue, the feel of your body rocking against his face.

You felt the shift in him as you began to pick up the pace, grinding harder against him. His hips jerked up into the air, desperate for any kind of relief. But he had nothing to grind against, nothing to alleviate the intense need that was building inside him. He was humping the air, whining and whimpering beneath you, his body trembling with the sheer force of his desire.

“Poor baby,” you cooed, your voice dripping with mock sympathy as you looked down at him, watching his face disappear between your thighs. “You had no idea, did you? How badly I wanted this… how badly I wanted you.”

He moaned again, his hands trembling as they gripped your thighs harder, trying to pull you down further onto his mouth. He was completely lost in you now, his tongue moving sloppily but enthusiastically as you rode his face. And the way he was so desperate, so utterly consumed by your pleasure, only made you want him more.

“You have no idea how long I’ve been fantasizing about this,” you continued, your voice breathy and filled with lust. “I’ve thought about you so many times, Ethan. Thought about how good it would feel to have you between my legs, thought about teaching you… showing you everything.”

Ethan whimpered beneath you, his hips jerking up even harder, humping the air like he couldn’t help himself. His tongue flicked faster, sloppier, as he devoured you, his whole body trembling with the force of his desperation.

“You’re so fucking hot,” you moaned, your pace picking up as you rode him faster, your fingers tugging on his curls. “God, I never thought I’d be into nerdy guys, but you—fuck, you drive me crazy. I couldn’t stop thinking about you in class, about what it would be like to have you like this… to make you mine.”

Ethan’s response was another desperate, muffled moan, his lips swollen and slick as he licked and sucked at you with reckless abandon. You could feel the tension in his body, the way he was humping the air helplessly, completely lost in his desire for you. His eyes fluttered shut as he moaned into you, his whimpers growing more frantic the faster you moved.

“I’ve been fantasizing about you for so long,” you continued, your voice trembling with lust. “Every time we hung out, every time you were so oblivious to how badly I wanted you, it drove me insane. I wanted to drag you into my room and just… fuck you until you couldn’t think straight, until you knew my body better than any of those fuckass econ graphs.”

Ethan’s hips bucked wildly beneath you at that, his whimpers turning into needy, broken sounds as his tongue worked you over with even more desperation. He was completely at your mercy, unable to do anything but whimper and moan as you used him for your own pleasure.

“And now, you’re here,” you gasped, your fingers tightening in his hair as you rocked harder against his face. “Now you’re mine… my good boy… making me feel so fucking good…”

Ethan let out a muffled cry beneath you, his whole body trembling as he sucked and licked with wild abandon, his desperation palpable. He was babbling incoherently, thanking you between gasps and whimpers, his voice barely audible against your skin.

You could feel the tension building inside you again, your body trembling as you rode his face faster, harder. The way he was so desperate, so eager to please you, was driving you wild. You could feel him practically worshipping you with every stroke of his tongue, every moan that spilled from his lips.

“You’re amazing,” you gasped, your voice breathy as you neared the edge once again. “So fucking amazing…”

Ethan’s response was another needy whimper, his tongue moving frantically as he tried to push you over the edge. His hips were still jerking up into the air, humping desperately as he sought any kind of release. But he didn’t stop—he couldn’t stop. He was completely consumed by his need to make you come, and the desperation in his movements only made your pleasure intensify.

“Oh my god,” you moaned, your head falling back as you felt yourself tipping over the edge. “I’m gonna come again, Ethan… don’t stop…”

He let out a desperate groan, his lips swollen and slick as he licked and sucked at you with everything he had, his hips still humping the air in helpless need. And with one final, frantic flick of his tongue, you came undone once again.

Your body shook as your orgasm ripped through you, your hips bucking wildly against his face as you cried out. But even as you came, even as you trembled and gasped, Ethan didn’t stop. He kept going, his tongue working you over with desperate, wild enthusiasm, as if he couldn’t get enough of you.

By the time you came down from your high, your legs were shaking, your body still trembling from the intensity of it all. You glanced down at Ethan, your breath catching at the sight of him—his face was a mess, his lips swollen and slick, his eyes dazed and wide with lust. And yet, he was still going, still licking you like he was addicted to the taste of you.

“Fuck, Ethan,” you gasped, breathless and dazed as you looked down at him. “You’re a fucking mess…”

He moaned in response, his hips jerking wildly as he humped the air, his whimpers growing more frantic as he continued to devour you. He was completely lost in it now, utterly consumed by his need to please you.

“God, you really want it bad, don’t you?” you murmured, your voice teasing as you looked down at him. “You’re so desperate for me… and I love it.”

He whined again, his hands gripping your thighs as he tried to pull you down harder onto his face, his babbling incoherent as he thanked you again and again, practically worshipping you with his mouth.

As you pulled yourself away from Ethan’s face, he let out a desperate whine, his hands twitching as if he was already mourning the loss of your taste. His lips were even more swollen, and his eyes, still dazed with lust, blinked up at you, wide with need.

He opened his mouth to beg, but you silenced him before he could utter a word, sliding down his body with a smirk. His breath hitched in his throat as he watched you, wide-eyed and trembling beneath you as he realized what you were about to do.

“Now it’s my turn,” you whispered, your voice dripping with lust and amusement as you looked down at him, dragging your nails lightly over his heaving chest. “Let me show you how it feels…”

Ethan’s breath came out in a ragged gasp as your hands slid lower, his body jerking beneath your touch. When you finally reached him, you paused, your fingers lightly grazing his hardness through his boxers, and you couldn’t help the look of surprise that crossed your face.

He was big.

For a moment, you just stared, slightly taken aback, before a wicked grin spread across your lips. “Well, well,” you teased, slipping your hand beneath the fabric and wrapping your fingers around him. Ethan let out a sharp gasp, his entire body shuddering at your touch. “You’ve been hiding this the whole time, huh?”

Ethan’s response was a choked whimper, his hips bucking up into your hand as you slowly stroked him, your touch light and teasing. “Oh, fuck…” he groaned, his voice shaky and ragged as he trembled beneath you. “I—fuck, I didn’t…”

You cut him off, leaning down to press a kiss to the tip of his length, your lips brushing over the sensitive skin as he moaned loudly, his hands gripping the sheets so tightly his knuckles turned white.

“Jesus, this feels incredible,” he gasped, his head falling back against the pillows as you began to stroke him in earnest, your hand sliding up and down his length, feeling him throb under your touch. “Holy shit, that feels so good…”

You moaned around him, your own arousal spiking at the sound of his voice, at the way he was completely unraveling beneath you. You could feel him throbbing in your mouth, his length twitching as you hollowed your cheeks, sucking harder. His hips bucked up again, and you had to steady him with your hands, your fingers gripping his thighs as you began to bob your head, taking him deeper with every movement.

Ethan was losing it. His breath came out in ragged pants, his hips jerking up into your mouth as he swore under his breath, his voice shaky and desperate. “Oh my god… I… fuck, that’s so good, I can’t—fuck, I can’t…”

You smirked around him, your hands stroking the parts of him you couldn’t reach with your mouth, feeling him pulse under your touch. He was so responsive, so utterly lost in the pleasure, and it was driving you wild. You loved watching him fall apart, loved knowing that you were the one making him feel this way.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Ethan moaned, his voice a mess of broken curses as his hips bucked up again, his body trembling beneath you. “I’ve never… I didn’t know… oh my god…”

You took him deeper, your tongue swirling around him as you moaned again, the vibrations making him shudder. He was babbling now, incoherent sounds spilling from his lips as he tried to hold himself together, but you could tell he was close—his breath was coming in ragged gasps, his body tense, his hips jerking up into your mouth with every movement.

“Please…” he gasped, his voice barely audible as he whimpered beneath you, his hands gripping the sheets so tightly it looked like he might tear them. “Please don’t stop, I need—fuck, I need you…”

You didn’t. You kept going, your pace quickening as you took him as deep as you could, your hands stroking him faster. His reactions were driving you wild—the way he was falling apart beneath you, the way he couldn’t stop swearing and moaning your name. His hips were out of control now, jerking up into your mouth with every bob of your head, and you could tell he was teetering on the edge.

“Oh fuck… I’m so close, I’m so fucking close…” Ethan’s voice was high and desperate, his whole body trembling as he gasped for breath, his hips bucking uncontrollably. “I’m gonna—”

You pulled back slightly, teasing him, licking slowly up his length as you watched him writhe beneath you. His eyes flew open, wide and glazed with lust, and he let out a loud, desperate whimper, his hips jerking up into the air in a futile attempt to chase your mouth.

“Please,” he begged, his voice shaky and desperate. “Please, I need you…”

You smiled wickedly, your hand still stroking him as you leaned down, your lips brushing over his tip as you whispered, “You’re so fucking hot when you’re falling apart like this.”

Ethan moaned loudly, his head falling back against the pillows as his hips bucked up again, his entire body trembling with the force of his need. He was so close, teetering on the edge, and you could see it in the way his chest heaved, the way his voice cracked with every moan.

“We have plenty of time for you to cum in my mouth Landry. But for now, the only place I want your cum is in my pussy,” you grinned wickedly as you crawled back up his body and grabbed his shaft to rub through your dripping folds. “You want this, baby?”

When all you received in response was a rushed nod, whimper and jerk of the hips, you tutted disapprovingly, leaning over to whisper in his ear.

“Cmon pretty boy, I know you can do better than that. I haven’t even put your cock in my pussy yet, there’s no way you’re too fucked out to speak, use your words,”

“Please- I need to feel you around my cock, need you so so bad!” He whimpered in desperation, jerking his hips up to nudge against your entrance. The movement made you giggle before finally relenting, sinking down on his thick length in one go, prompting a string of curses to fall from both of your lips. You bit your lip and mewled at the full feeling that overtook your body, feeling full from finally having that sexy clueless nerd balls deep in you.

You could feel Ethan trembling beneath you as you began to move, his hands gripping your thighs with a hesitant touch. His nerves were obvious, the way his breath hitched in his throat, the way his body stiffened every time you sank down on him. He was trying so hard to hold it together, but you knew he was on the verge of losing control—and you were going to push him right over the edge.

You smirked as you started to rock your hips, your movements slow and teasing at first, just to watch him squirm. His eyes fluttered shut, and his mouth fell open with a shaky gasp as you took him in deeper. It was almost cute, the way he was trying to hold on, but you were far too impatient for that.

“Aw, look at you honey,” you cooed, your voice dripping with amusement as you leaned down, your lips brushing against his ear. “Is this too much for you? Already falling apart and I’ve barely even started.”

Ethan let out a choked whimper, his hands gripping your hips tighter as his body trembled beneath you. “I-I’m sorry,” he gasped, his voice shaky and breathless. “I just—fuck, you feel so good, I don’t… I can’t…”

You laughed softly, your nails dragging down his chest as you rocked your hips a little harder, a little faster. “I know, baby,” you purred, your voice low and teasing. “I know it’s your first time, so I’ll take it easy on you… for now.”

He whimpered again, his hands trembling as they slid up your thighs, gripping you tightly as if he was trying to ground himself. But you weren’t about to let him off that easy.

“You’ve been dreaming about this, haven’t you?” you murmured, your voice sultry and playful as you leaned in closer, your breath hot against his ear. “All those nights you were too shy to even look at me, thinking you didn’t stand a chance. But now look at you—finally getting what you’ve been begging for, and you don’t even know how to handle it.”

Ethan let out a strangled moan, his hips jerking up into you as his whole body trembled beneath you. “I… I didn’t think…” He could barely get the words out, his breath coming in short, ragged gasps. “I didn’t think you’d ever want me like this…”

You grinned wickedly, your hands sliding up his chest as you moved faster, your hips grinding down against him. “Oh, baby, you have no idea,” you whispered, your voice dripping with lust as you started to ride him harder. “I’ve wanted you for so long… watching you get all flustered around me, trying to hide how much you wanted me… It drove me crazy.”

Ethan moaned loudly, his head falling back against the pillow as he arched into your movements, his entire body trembling. His eyes were half-lidded with lust, his lips parted in breathless whimpers as he struggled to keep up with your pace. He was so close, and you could tell he was doing everything he could to hold back, to make it last, but you weren’t going to let him.

“You’ve been so good, though,” you teased, your voice a low purr as you dragged your nails down his chest. “Begging me with those puppy eyes, thinking you weren’t good enough for me… But look at you now, baby. Look how good you feel inside me. You’re doing so well.”

His eyes flew open at your praise, wide and dazed as he looked up at you. He whimpered, his body trembling beneath you, his hands clutching at your thighs as if he was trying to hold on. “I… I want more,” he gasped, his voice desperate and pleading. “Please… I want more…”

You leaned down, your lips brushing against his ear as you whispered, “You want more, baby? You want me to ride you until you can’t take it anymore?”

Ethan nodded frantically, his breath coming in ragged pants as he bucked up into you, his whole body trembling. “Please,” he begged, his voice shaky and desperate. “Please, I need more… I need you…”

You smirked, loving the way he was falling apart beneath you. “Such a good boy,” you murmured, your voice dripping with praise and amusement as you started to ride him faster, harder, your hips grinding down against him with every thrust. “You’re doing so good for me, baby. I didn’t think you’d be able to handle this, but you’re proving me wrong.”

Ethan let out a loud, broken moan, his hips jerking up into you as he whimpered beneath you, his body trembling with every movement. “I… I’m trying… fuck, I’m trying so hard…”

“Of course you are,” you purred, leaning down to nip at his earlobe, making him shudder. “But you don’t have to try so hard, baby. Just let go. Let me make you feel good.”

He let out a desperate whimper, his hands shaking as they slid up your sides, gripping you tightly as if he was afraid to let go. “I don’t… I don’t know if I can last…”

“Good,” you breathed, your hips grinding down harder as you felt him start to lose control beneath you. “Don’t hold back. I want you to come for me.”

Ethan’s breath hitched in his throat, his eyes rolling back as his whole body tensed beneath you. “I… fuck, I can’t… I’m gonna—”

“Come for me, baby,” you whispered, your voice commanding as you rode him harder, feeling him throbbing inside you. “Fill me up.”

With a loud, desperate moan, Ethan finally tipped over the edge, his hips jerking up into you as his whole body convulsed beneath you, trembling with the force of his release. You could feel him pulsing inside you, his hands gripping you so tightly it almost hurt, but it only drove you further, riding him through his orgasm as he gasped and whimpered beneath you.

“Such a good boy,” you purred, your voice dripping with praise as you slowed your movements, letting him come down from the high. “You did so well for me, baby. So, so good.”

Ethan’s breath came in ragged gasps, his body trembling beneath you as he blinked up at you, his eyes wide and dazed. His cheeks were flushed, his hair a mess, and he looked completely gone—and it was the hottest thing you’d ever seen.

“Fuck,” he breathed, his voice shaky as he looked up at you with wide, awe-filled eyes. “That was… I can’t even…”

You grinned down at him, your fingers brushing through his messy hair as you leaned in close, your lips brushing against his. “Don’t worry, baby,” you whispered, your voice a low purr. “We’re just getting started.”

As Ethan came down from his high, still panting beneath you, you could see a spark ignite in his eyes. His gaze shifted, taking in every curve of your body as if he was seeing you for the first time. You leaned down, brushing your lips against his, teasing him with every movement as you felt him start to regain his composure.

“Okay, let’s switch it up a bit,” you said, your voice sultry and playful. “I want to show you how to make me feel even better.”

He looked up at you, a hint of nervousness still lingering in his expression. “How do you want me to… uh, you know, do it?”

You grinned, loving how eager he was to learn. “Let me show you,” you purred, sliding off him and turning around so you were both on your knees, facing each other. “Just like this. Get ready to take me in missionary.”

Ethan’s eyes widened with anticipation as you positioned yourself under him. You could see the nervous energy coursing through him, but you were determined to help him embrace this moment. “Just relax and let me guide you,” you said softly, your voice warm and encouraging.

As you settled yourself beneath him, you took a moment to enjoy the way his body looked beneath you. He was handsome, with those sweet, boyish features that drove you wild. You could see the tension in his muscles, but the way he gazed at you with those wide, innocent eyes made your heart race.

“Now,” you said, your voice sultry as you leaned down closer, brushing your lips against his. “I want you to push into me. Just like before, but this time, you’re in control.” You slowly guided him into you, letting him feel how warm and inviting you were, watching his face contort with pleasure.

Ethan’s breath hitched as he pushed in deeper, the sensation igniting something primal in him. “Like this?” he asked, his voice thick with need.

“Exactly,” you replied, encouraging him with a sultry smile. “Now, I want you to find your rhythm. Just focus on how good it feels to be inside me.”

He nodded, his eyes locked on yours as he began to move, cautiously at first. With each thrust, he grew more confident, his movements becoming faster and more deliberate. You could feel the intensity building between you, the way he filled you completely driving you wild.

“That’s it, baby,” you encouraged, your voice low and filled with desire. “You’re doing so good. Just like that. Harder.”

Ethan responded to your words, his thrusts becoming more enthusiastic, more urgent. The way he looked at you—his eyes dark with lust, his lips parted in a breathless moan—made your heart race even faster. You couldn’t help but revel in the heat of the moment, every sound, every movement sending a shiver of excitement through your body.

“God, you’re so hot,” you said, your voice dripping with lust as you leaned down to whisper in his ear. “I can’t believe how well you’re handling this. You’re making me feel incredible.”

His breath hitched at your words, and you could see the way they spurred him on. “I… I love this,” he gasped, his thrusts becoming more frantic, his confidence building with every word of praise you offered.

“You love making me feel good, don’t you?” you teased, your hips rolling against him as you encouraged him to go deeper. “I want to hear you say it.”

“I love making you feel good!” he exclaimed, his voice strained but filled with enthusiasm. The way he focused solely on your pleasure made you even more aroused, and you could feel the heat pooling low in your belly as you pushed him further.

“Good boy,” you praised, a sultry smile gracing your lips. “Now, tell me how much you want this.”

“I want it so bad,” he groaned, his hands gripping your hips tightly, his eyes locked on yours. “I want to make you come. I want to feel you around me.”

Your heart raced at his words, and you felt a rush of desire surge through you. “Then don’t hold back, Ethan. Show me just how much you want it.”

With a renewed sense of urgency, he began to thrust faster, his movements becoming more confident as he lost himself in the rhythm. Each thrust sent waves of pleasure crashing through you, and you couldn’t help but cry out, your body responding eagerly to his every movement.

“Yes! Just like that!” you moaned, your voice breathless as you leaned down closer, feeling his warm breath against your skin. “You’re doing amazing, Ethan. Keep going.”

He nodded, his expression one of pure concentration mixed with lust. “I’m going to make you feel so good,” he promised, his voice thick with desire. You could see the determination in his eyes, and it only made you want him more.

With every thrust, he grew bolder, and you could tell he was getting lost in the moment. The way he gazed at you—filled with awe and desire—only fueled your own excitement. “You’re so beautiful,” he breathed, his voice trembling as he lost himself in the pleasure. “I can’t believe I get to be with you like this.”

“Just focus on me,” you urged, your voice sultry and commanding. “Let yourself go. I want to feel you completely.”

His breaths grew ragged, and you could see the pleasure building in him, his movements becoming more frantic as he tried to keep up with your pace. “I’m so close,” he gasped, his voice thick with need. “I don’t want to stop. I want to feel you come with me.”

“Then don’t hold back, baby,” you said, your voice dripping with lust. “Come for me. I want to feel you inside me.”

With those words, you pushed him over the edge, feeling his body tense beneath you as he let out a deep, guttural groan, his hips bucking up into yours as he finally let go. The pleasure washed over you both, and you couldn’t help but cry out as you felt him fill you completely, your body trembling in response.

Ethan’s face was flushed with desire, his lips swollen and parted as he gasped for breath, and you couldn’t help but grin at the sight. He looked utterly gone, and it was the most intoxicating thing you’d ever seen. “You did so good,” you praised, your voice low and sultry as you leaned down, brushing your lips against his. “I knew you had it in you.”

As he came down from his high, a blissful smile spread across his face, and you felt a sense of pride and relief. Well that pining hadn’t been for nothing and you finally got your perfect boy.

Oh Mindy was gonna eat her fucking words.

I feel like I should make an Ethan taglist? Lmk if you would want to be on it!

[levemetal]

Hi hello, I rushed this and I cannot be arsed to properly render this. I have other things to draw, many of them. But also. I really put too much effort into the flat of this that I kinda burned myself out LMAO

ANYWAY CALAMITY/GHOST KING SHEN JIU DESIGN. Take it, cherish him like I would. I wanted to dress him up like the pretty princess he is <3 Plus, ghost kings a la tgcf gotta slay in all categories so here we go. I'll ramble more about the more coherent thoughts I have but you can tear ghost king SJ from my cold dead hands. ٩( ᐛ )و

His motivations more becoming a ghost king/calamity are fairly straightforward if you're familiar with Shen Jiu and all the funky workings of his mind. It is to be stronger than everybody else and attaining a place that cannot be taken from him cause he has the power for it. So that no one else can have any power over him either.

However this also means that he does not necessarily have any grand plans of what to do with that power. I imagine he'd be a recluse, living off and alone somewhere hardly getting involved in the affairs of the living and gods etc.

If he does, I imagine it might more be in the style of killing slavers and otherwise bad men. Maybe a sort of brothel workers protector, getting rid of the most problematic and horrible clients? Let your imagination wander!

For a title? I have no clue man, I am not good enough at words for this. Something with green or teal as the color and leaves. That's how far I got.

Now the juicy stuff, POWERS. Leaves. Leaves and fans is the tldr version. I imagine he'd use the qi-infused leaves as in canon, just far more deadlier (probably) and conjured rather than just reliant on leaves off trees in the vicinity. For a weapon, if available (read: SY is not possessing SJ's OG body, or Xiu Ya was not obtained) I think he should get to keep Xiu Ya, or otherwise a blood weapon shaped after it. Tho if I had to give him a blood weapon a la Hua Cheng's E'ming, it would be a fan. The blades on it would likely be shift on, both an edge to cut with and places for darts to fly out. Otherwise in terms of weapons I could see daggers very well too for SJ. They'd suit him, as he could get in and get a quick stab or just throw them from afar. With his fighting style that likely has a lot of the ruthless tactics of his youth incorporated, I think it would fit just like a battle fan.

Otherwise, I do see him being a capable shapeshifter, or some sort of abilities to stay in the shadows undetected. If he needs some sort of animal or communication/surveillance skill associated with him, I personally would pick ravens. Spiritually created ravens as a sort of spying network and surveillance method.

Another juicy detail could be cultivation method. Tgcf does mention that the ghosts still have their own form of cultivating their power. For example, He Xuan eats and absorbs the abilities of other ghosts, whereas Hua Cheng is mentioned to cultivate via slaughtering. The xianxia in tgcf is rather vague now that I have a few more danmei under my belt, and specifically Devil Venerable also wants to know has given me a looot of thoughts about some interesting ways to detail this if it is so desired for a setting. Do please keep in mind tho I haven't really researched cultivation and the wuxia/xianxia 101 worldbuilding yet so this may not make sense. Anywho:

For Shen Jiu in particular I'd find it interesting to give him his own form rather than just copying either Hua Cheng (most fitting imo) or He Xuan (bonus eating disorder included, hooray!). So here are some ideas I had in no particular order:

- Take the core melting aspect from mdzs and applying it to ghosts (sorta): dissolving and absorbing the cores/qi of cultivators and ghosts alike, thus claiming the power for his own.

- Blood. Think less vampire and more slaughter. The messier the kill essentially, bleed the victims dry and absorb the blood to transform it into qi. (Thank you returning Dragon Age brainrot)

- dvawtk's Path of Slaughter. It doesn't really fit SJ as it relies on constantly finding stronger opponents to fight and challenge, especially ones stronger than oneself and persevering against the odds. Not his personal choice but it would poetically fit him and his entire life pretty well.

That's all for now. If you made it till here.... have a gold star: ⭐️

[runaeveena]

Your dashboard if you were in a d&d fantasy world still involved in fictional erotica discourse

🦄feywildwildwild Follow

is anyone else tired of humans being the default race to pair up with monstrous races in smut? like no wonder Tinker & Claw didn't get any traction outside of TomePlane

🪶 eagledust4ever Follow

tinker and claw was mid and written by a gnome sexologist and are we still calling non humanoids "monstrous"? in 186PD no less?

🕰️ gnomepologist

so now the eagledust shipper (and fake auran language scholar) is going to preach to us 🙄 some of us dont want to read about humans laying eggs every third month

🪶 eagledust4ever Follow

way to avoid the issue and maintain your humanoidcentric elitism but sure lets argue about kinks on tomeblr

🍆 troll-schlong

all of you shut up humans are sluts and im a motherfucking m-m-m-monster

345 Notes

🌧️ hau-iratxoa-besterik-ez-da-euskaraz Follow

just saw someone on TomePlane argue that a dragonborn and a dragon having sex would be considered incest AND beastiality

🗝️ crypt-princess Follow

💀💀💀 not every dragon was part of the Great Hatching and most dragonborn know who our lineage derives from

and since when are dragons BEASTS!?

☘️ celest-ial Follow

you should see what else people on TomePlane call beastiality

🦨 ancientskeleton

we are not bringing back the druid debate sylvanus help me

11,008 Notes

🩵 faerieee-imagines2 Follow

imagine you've been capture by an evil sorcerer and he puts you in a glass jar that's filled with firemoss which is so comfy but its making you so warm so you have to undress and as you remove each item you realize the sorcerer has been watching you and now you're blushing and its maki g you even warmer and soon youll be completely naked and vulnerable to whatever the sorcerer wants you for

121 Notes

🌠 crownofstars

cant believe i got called a freak for hooking up with a Slaad at the Unicorn's Underhorn

🕯️andersfirelight Follow

they're literally abominations??

🌠 crownofstars

and? ribbit ribbit bitch 🐸 you write Age of Light rpf

75 Notes

🦹mage-ocracy Follow

wow this farmer nobody has become such a handsome paladin with a chiseled chest after i threw his family into a lava pit years ago

🦹mage-ocracy Follow

waaahahaha you have fallen for my trap *casts spell of get horny* *spell hits the mirror which reflects back onto me* *my throbbing boner slices through the ropes holding the paladin* waaaahaa

14,283 Notes

🦚 faeynadaughter Follow

honestly im glad humans are the main target for erotica because elves have been sexualized for far too long

🍯treebarkhookhandwagondoor

part of the halfling sexual liberation movement was to embrace sexualizsation because we were treated as undesirables under the Valief'taur Period that now its weird to see elves suddenly turn face and claim that sexualizing anyone is bad

🪡 scç-writer

ugh honestly and especially now that elves are using Glindeloomstalk's talking points as if theyre here to "uplift" us from eroticism when halflings have known for years how he was a purity kinkster

3,119 Notes

🌠 crownofstars

this is now a slaad fucker blog

20 Notes

⚔️ rangerdick

oooo "humans are too sexualized" ooo "elf pussy is boring now" once again everyone forgets about orcs being treated like the walking cock with hands in books and irl

⚓riilée Follow

isnt orcish religion about fucking and sucking to take over the world

⚔️ rangerdick

you wish you could suck me off

🧜🏼‍♀️ tritonitistitties Follow

ranger dick don't you post daily dick pics

⚔️ rangerdick

i also post hole but no one seems to notice those wonder why that is

🐓the-walking-cock-with-hands Follow

i noticed

⚔️ rangerdick

hold me and fuck me would you

21,447 Notes

🦁king-killa Follow

Everyone you have to read this new book! It's total trope subversion where the dwarf is pansexual and the orc is asexual!

🍺 i-fuck-hags

wow someone should write a play about this

[blankd]

DM/GMing Tips

(aka what I learned with my campaign which ran for about 4 years, totaling 131 sessions, so I must have been doing something right)

*these tips are NOT exclusive to DnD, more than one of these is bound to help in running a TTRPG, if you have a specific question, feel free to hit up my askbox

Session 0 is important for setting expectations for everyone involved as well as establishing your safety tools if desired (every table is different).

The game's story is not exhaustively penned by the GM but by the players who will tell the story after the session sends. If you want to tell a specific story, you'll be more fulfilled writing a book.

Have a start and an idea of what the end could be, the rest will be sorted in play. (If you're using a module, read ahead and make notes that are useful for yourself.)

The job of the GM is to put the players in Situations or Throw a Grenade.

Hooks are opt-in and more passive, "I heard there's a dragon", Situations/Grenades are direct and require player input immediately, "there is a dragon attacking RIGHT NOW". There are pros/cons to both, use them to create tempo and tension.

The moment you ask the players what they want to do, the proverbial pen is in their hands. NEVER take away a Player's agency. If logic/mechanics would make that action impossible, present it as such, and let the consequences play out where applicable.

Reward curiosity, if a player asks a question, have an answer, even if it's just flavor. You're also only human, if you need time for the answer, give what relevant info you have in the moment and give a more detailed follow up later if it needs ones. (This is a skill, don't feel bad if you start off with more blanks than answers.)

Provide in-game feedback for actions players take. Not everything needs to have far-reaching repercussions but there should be some kind of cause-and-effect to make the world and the beings living in it feel reactive.

NPCs should have an immediate, but simple purpose and an additional aspect to give them a little meat. If the players take interest in that NPC, you can build them out further through conversation. This will become easier as you get a grip on improv.

Have a list of names or a randomizer if you find you're at a loss for NPC creation.

Have an idea toybox. Players don't know NPCs or encounters they never meet, if they 'miss it' you can turn it into an opportunity to meet them later. There is no science to it, but you'll get a feel for what can be repurposed or upcycled, sometimes that change in context makes them more memorable. Sensibility creates believability, exceptions create curiosity. A 'missed' merchant ending up displaced in a weird location can expand into a better hook than simply being found in a bazaar.

Player cleverness and diplomacy should be rewarded, if they say something convincing, roll with it the best you can. However never forget that the more important/powerful an NPC, the stronger their convictions. Certain NPCs should be beyond convincing and it's up to you to convey that.

Don't forget the spirit of the game! RP can get pretty intense, but at the end of the day this is about COLLABORATIVE imagination and expression. Make the best memories you can.

[ansbobcar]

I'm ready to become a part-time lore builder of a fandom if I can't get any answers.

Seriously. Time to do some mental gymnastics again because, I LOVE TALKING ABOUT LORE (well worldbuilding lore) AND MAKING LORE IF THERE IS NOTHING ABOUT IT!!

We're back to looking at the Divine Visionaries again because, what the hell are these administration/department/subdivisions man.

Here are my rankings of most straightforward to least straightforward (in terms of what they govern) and my reasoning, questions, headcanons AND MANGA SPOILERS. Feel free to discuss!

1. MAGICAL ITEMS

It's basically quality control check of any magical tool and also acts like a museum. Very straightforward to guess. It's managing, checking the quality of new, old, or powerful magical items. We also know the most about it I think because Rayne currently manages it (idk why i trust the fandom wiki)

2. FORBIDDEN MAGICAL TEXTS

This is also straightforward. They manage forbidden magical texts from being accessed to the public. But I'd like to think that this department has to ensure that any texts which use magic, such as newspapers and maybe even children's books, abide by their printing laws and don't enter into that forbidden valley. Prevention of more forbidden magical texts is probably one of their main goals. I mean, confiscation of books and materials or clues regarding them will either be stored or burned possibly. Censorship is a possibility.

3. MAGIC SECURITY (FORCE)

Every time I hear security I think of that random post from twitter I think about how the US' whole military like thing is called the defense something or something. AND I THINK ABOUT IT. But you know atleast security makes more sense.

Current headcanon is that the magic police is under their jurisdiction but being called a magic security officer is diff from a magic police officer. The main difference is that magic police focus solely on internal and surface level, local scale magic (and lack-magic) crimes.

Magic Security is a more national/international scale, or something that involves the Bureau directly. Like a war between other magical races or those type of conflicts. The bar to being a magic security officer is much higher than a magic police officer too.

4. MAGICAL CEMETERY

The management of deceased magic users/wizards is pretty straight forward BUT what I'm tryna figure out is:

a) How many official cemeteries are under their jurisdiction? If so is it illegal to bury a deceased wizard's body on your own?

b) Do they only manage the cemeteries? If they don't does that mean that it's a law to contact their department while preparing for a funeral and burial? How early do they have to get involved?

c) Whoever was managing this division when Adam Jobs died was not good at their job. Nvm this guy's body was gone to bits. Still bad management on their part to not scavenge for that bit of flesh left over. Burn the area to the ground if you have to. Fucking Innocent Zero got his body.

5. MAGICAL CREATURES

The only reason I have this much lower than I initially intended is because there are so many fucking magical creatures in this fucking world that it should be one of the biggest ass divisions of the Bureau alongside Magical Items.

a) You need research/encyclopedias on these creatures. What their weakness is and so on, research on magical creatures (probably in conjunction with magical research).

b) Is animal cruelty a thing in this world? It probably is. It better be then there has to be a governing body for that.

c) I feel like for magical magical creatures like Dragons, they have to manage/hand out yearly licenses towards educational institutes to allow those dragons to be used. Otherwise, I think they'll be released to the wild and will be blacklisted from ever owning a dragon. (Animal cruelty act or something)

d) They probably have a national zoo which is used for both research and conservation purposes. Bet there's a bunch of endangered species.

6. MAGICAL RESEARCH

Just like the previous department/administration... this is also pretty broad. (You'll realise a pattern as we go down the list). The way I see it is that every year, they gather statistics and feedback from the people, and come up with 4-6 projects of varying scales to help. These can range from new technology for pre-existing magical tools or making new innovations and tools.

They also do research on animals, plants and probably somewhat manage the welfare of the country slightly.

What I wonder is if it's illegal to do research outside of their department? Or do they allow exceptions, like some company can pitch their idea to the magical research department who then greenlight their thing or not like Dragon's Den.

7. MAGICAL POWER

Orter and Rinka, idk how y'all even do this. Magical Power Admin according to the fandom wiki (which I think took info from the fanbook, but cannot confirm), looks into shit related to power basically (abuse, lack ofs, very magical power creatures).

My problem is that kind of overlaps with magic security just slightlyyy. I also headcanon that the magic police are governed by magic security and magical power.

So far for my fanfic (big spoilers lol):

a) Their main goal is to reduce/prevent the abuse of magic within the kingdom/country.

b) They can make and enforce laws/policies/the legal rules surrounding the use of magic which include giving penalties/punishments.

8. MAGICAL TALENT

What the fuck is Kaldo's job. I get he looks at Divine Visionary candidates before they even get to the final exam but seriously. I would like to think that part of his job is to take note of what kind of personal magic has ever fucking existed other than tryna analyse people. If his department was more like HR, I think it'd make more sense.

His department probably has the least amount of people/staff.

_ _ _

There's probably other departments as well that aren't governed by a Divine Visionary for now. My ted talk is finished. For now.

[utilitycaster]

You know, it always frustrates me when people refuse to branch out and try new TTRPGs, stubbornly clinging to things that bring them happiness, so I wanted to provide a little recommendation you might not have considered: D&D.

You might have heard of Dungeons and Dragons, or D&D as it's frequently called, from the 2023 movie, or, if you're a little more tuned in, Stranger Things, but it's been around since the 1970s! And if you haven't given it a go, it's worth checking out.

Obviously you’d be looking for alternatives to Pathfinder given past reports from employees that they had to unionize in order to get the company to follow basic OSHA regulations and repeated accusations of underpaying both staff and freelancers. Fear not! D&D 5e is an intuitive switch - Pathfinder 1e was originally based on an earlier edition of D&D, and the cast of Critical Role actually made this same switch, so it’s been done before! You’ll find most of the same classes, a large homebrew community, and similar combat mechanics - but much more streamlined. If you’ve been rolling your eyes at the near-infinite ability check range in Pathfinder 1e, or the fact that you need to look up twenty factors before assigning a difficulty class, or the need to burn an entire action to maintain spell concentration, D&D simplifies it. With a handful of exceptions for classes with expertise, and not including the possibility of bardic inspiration being used on an already successful roll, most checks will be below 35, and DCs can be created by the DM - which is just one of the many ways D&D prioritizes player agency, a phrase we understand the meaning of and care about deeply.

And now that bears are out of vogue due to their association with hard drugs thanks to Cocaine Bear, you might be looking for alternatives to your Honey Heist game. One of my favorite games is D&D, which has the bonus of being flexible enough for both one-session games, and something ongoing! Pre-created character sheets and modules are available for free, so it can be as low-prep or as involved as you want. If you’re missing the animal aspects, check out the druid class, or you could take a look at the blood hunter class by Matt Mercer (who you may know as Trinket from Trinket’s Honey Heist) if you’re interested in playing a creature who might lose control. The McElroys, known Honey Heist players, have actually run several D&D campaigns if you are looking to onboard. Also, let's be real: Honey Heist is overly simplistic - seriously, only one page? - and has dumb hats, and if you knew about the other options, you'd obviously not be playing it.

Speaking of the McElroys, I bet we have some Blades in the Dark and PbtA fans in the audience! If you find mixed success mechanics frustrating, want to be able to have larger-scale, higher-stakes battles without the risk of dying immediately, or are interested in a less regimented structure that is more setting-agnostic, as well as provides opportunities for the Game Master (called a Dungeon Master in D&D) to fail, D&D is worth a look! It's a fairly combat-heavy game and characters are built to be able to withstand some heavy hits, so a large battle won't bring the narrative to a halt as your characters struggle to find outlets for their unhealthy coping mechanisms in order to recover (though, of course, if you like that, the open RP and general ability check mechanisms make it easy to include)!

What's important, in the end, is to remember that the TTRPG you are currently enjoying is wrong, bad, and stupid. Choose the game I, an internet stranger who has made no effort to learn anything of your personal tastes, interests, and the needs of your table, has decided you should play. And remember: the most important thing is having fun.

[jasper-tarot-reader]

For the three kings divination test! My name is Setanta (he/it), my king is the king of wands (I'm assuming that's what you meant? I can resend the ask if not), it's an in court question, my element is water, and my question is: how do I get back into being creative for its own sake? School has really drained me of my energy, and I want to start enjoying doing my own writing for fun, but I can't make myself for some reason. Just kinda looking for advice! :D

Three Kings Divination Explanation

Ah, not quite what I meant about King or Queen, that just represents which of the two "higher Court" members I use for the reading, so in this case, you're the King of the Court of Water! So congratulations, you have been sent from the Court of Fire to reign in the absence of the King of Water and thus temporarily take that mantle.

For this reading, the Antique Anatomy Tarot is the querent and the King of Elixirs along with the head of the Court of Water, the Neopets Tarot is the Queen and the Queen of Cups, and the Skyrim Tarot is the Fool and the Knight of Voice.

You are the King of Elixirs, head of the Court of Water. Your advice to yourself is the Page of Rods upright and Strength upright. You're on the verge of a snap from stagnation to creative activity, but you need to think calmly about it - you need to make opportunities for yourself to indulge in creativity. Make it bad, but make it.

In my practice, I don't associate the Major Arcana with elements unless they come built-in with elements in the deck already like this deck has. Strength is associated not just with Fire but also with Leo. Water and Fire are enemy elements who have a similar approach and would work well together if they could just mediate for five minutes, but Fire would rather suplex Water into a wall and Water wants to drown Fire in the kitchen sink. They would benefit each other well by just talking.

Your Queen is the Queen of Cups, the Soup Faerie. She is a Faerie who lives in Neopia Central and spends her days stirring her magical cauldron of soup, which she gives for free to broke Neopians. Her advice to you is the Ten of Cups upright and the Knight of Wands upright. There are many fun things you can do to create, especially for yourself, but sometimes the greatest way to get back into the creative streak is to talk to a friend or family member who encourages your creativity! Charge forward and create, don't merely wait for the mood to strike.

Well look at that, another Water-Fire duo...looks like the Court of Fire misses you. Perhaps doing a Fire-focused creativity spell, potentially involving candles if you can burn them safely, might be something you should look into.

Your Fool is the Knight of Voice, Arngeir of the Greybeards. He is the highest-leveled Greybeard and the only one of the four who can speak safely without rattling the walls. His advice to you is the Knight of Spells upright and Justice upright. He advises that you focus on things that spark your passion, like pieces of media you enjoy, but also warns that focusing solely on creativity might make you arrogant. A balanced approach is called for, so don't burn yourself out by focusing on creation to the detriment of your physical health.

As established, I don't usually associate the Major Arcana with elements unless the deck comes built in with them. On the other hand, Justice depicts Talos the Stormcrown, the King of Earth and Sky, the Dragon of the North. This is the Earth and Air, the mediating elements between Water and Fire, that has been missing in this reading. Finally, someone is here to reel things back and take a realistic approach.

It's not often that I receive the same card from multiple decks in these readings, so is there someone around you that you can describe with the Knight of Wands? Someone passionate, creative, who you enjoy talking to and can speak on equal terms with? Perhaps this is the friend you should make in order to give your creativity a phoenix-esque resurrection.

Please reblog this with feedback or send feedback to the ask box, as this is part of a test of the Three Kings Divination!

These readings wipe me out, so any insight, munching and crunching, and rambling thoughts you have about the reading will be very helpful with me analyzing how well this spread is doing! Anything you feel is pertinent, interesting, or personal - including your own interpretations of the cards or elements, if you wish - are welcome! Feel free to reblog this to whatever blog is most appropriate!

~Jasper

[isleepatfiveam]

Okay, so I Castlevania: Nocturne comes out in about 2 weeks, so here's some predictions from me. There is no particular order, but I will include some maybe future season predictions that are inspired by the games.

Also, I kinda wrote a fanfic in my head because of these predictions, so at the very least, I look forward to that after Season 2, and when I get my bearings about my second semester done.

Varney's back, baby. I think since Drac's staying either with Lisa or dead, we'll need someone to fill Belmont's all-need-to-face quota and I think Death would be a good fit for that, evidence from that includes this scene from the announcement trailer with the voice sound like Varney. Also, I personally really like Varney, and I want him back. If it's not Varney specifically, I kind of want it to be some sort of being like Varney. An entity that personifies a concept that is otherworldly and uses Vampires for there own goals.

Erzebeth's not the final boss and not in control. Kinda connected to the first one, but also because in the previous series, the show killed off Dracula in Season 2 (although under different circumstances), which might be seen as a rehash but might fit with game canon since the main sources for Nocturne are Rondo of Blood, Symphony of the Night and Bloodlines. She feels particularly animalistic and not in control in these screenshots, so I think we're going with her dying this season, maybe by a Berserker Richter (that leads to another prediction). The rest of the story happens with a different antagonist with a major time skip that also shows the bad side of the revolutions (aka Happy Times with the French National Barber) that'll make us question our mortality and which side is actually in the right.

Alucard vs Richter. Okay so I was squarely on the side of Alucard and Richter team-up but I thought of something way better because of Symphony of the Night. First, I think they'll team up against Drolta, then fight Erzebeth which would lead to her death and reveal that she was possessed by the real villain, that secretly possesses Alucard and leads to a fight with Richter and possessed Alucard. This will not only be thematic because Alucard saved them last season and now Richter's saving him, but will also lead to my next prediction.

Richter becomes the next antagonist. Okay, this one is mostly because I want Richter's Symphony of the Night design in the mouth-watering animation style, but also, it would be so cool to have a protagonist to switch up with Richter as an antagonist and Maria and Annette becoming main protagonist rescuing the Dude in distress. I'm not even saying Richter as a villain, although that would be cool, more as the Dragon to the real big bad guy (kinda like Drolta).

The main cast gets split up in Season 3/End of Season 2. Hopefully, we get a season 3 and go on with the Richter antagonist. I hope the cast should split up with Maria training with Alucard and Juste while Anette deals with Olrox (and hopefully some more Olrox backstory) to get stronger. For Season 2 in general I feel like Alucard-Richter, Maria-Juste will be our main training/battling partners.

Your Hands on fucking fire, Richter. Feel like a great consequence for Richter involves his fire fists actually hurting him, like causing actual 3rd degree burns that make him later use gloves. Evidence includes this pic where he clearly has burned arms while facing Drolta. Also don't think that it was caused by Erzabeth because, when Richter starts facing off with her in the trailer (when she seems to first lose control in the Church), it only breaks the ice from his gloves not burns the gloves off.

Tera or Juste. I feel like either Tera or Juste will die, and it'll be at Maria's hands. We know these two will fight as seen in the trailer, but we don't know who will die or if both of them will actually live because Maria. Because Juste can't use magic anymore, Maria doesn't really use the same magic Sypha does, but Tera does. So, in all likelihood the situation is this, Juste and Maria go after Tera, they meet in the graveyard that Tera is in when she jump scares us in the trailer, Tera traps Maria in ice while she and Juste fight, and Maria breaks out just when one of them is on the brink of killing the other. Personally feels like it's more likely to be Tera and the Dragon, she summons later in the trailer is a night creature thing made of Tera's corpse, but I feel that Tera is more likely to die than Juste just because of the hanging Maxim thread.

And lastly, the one thing I want to really happen in this season: Emmanuel dies. Preferably by the hands of Tera or by Maria. I feel like Maria's the most likely one to kill him because of where she summons the Dragon, which seems to be the Church. Honestly, I would be fine if all my predictions were wrong as long as someone kills Emmanuel.

So, to set the stage of where I think everyone is or will do in Season 2:

Maria and Juste are on Tera and Emmanuel duty. Tera and Juste fight in the graveyard while Maria is stuck in ice prison. One of the combatants dies, and after the fight, Maria goes berserk in the church and kills Emmanuel and destroying the machine by Dragon.

Annette, Alucard, Mizrak, and Richter are on Erzebeth and Drolta duty. They fight first in the Mansion (can't spell cathouse) on a berserk Erezebeth, Anette is taken out of the fight by Eduard, Mizrak by Olrox. That leaves Erzebeth to Richter and Alucard, who is attacked by Drolta, who is absolutely bloodthirsty at this point, Drolta almost kills Alucard, which gives Richter a power up and lets him beat and finally kill Drolta.

In the second phase of Erzebeth fight, Richter manages to win but is extremely injured. Saved, maybe by some vampire blood or by said mystery, Varney force.

[evvlevie]

MANIFESTATION / LUCID DREAMING / SHIFTING SUCCESS STORY!!!!

EVIE HIIII 🫶 happily entering your answering box with a success story that happened today INVOLVING the implementation of something you posted recently!!

I woke up at 6:38am this morning after lucid dreaming & making a portal to shift to my intended reality IN IT!!! IM SO SO HAPPY OML. Master shifter Master Manifestor Master Lucid dreamer‼️‼️

—————

LUCID DREAM + SHIFT TO HOME

I’ll start from yesterday + recently

The other day I read your recent post how you’ve had this little spray bottle beside your bed and before you sleep you spray it on you 4 times and say “this is my shifting spray, I will now shift tonight” and I DO have a little bottle of spray water on my bedside table I thought this was cute I should do this!! and implement it in my routine!! This was like 3 days? Ago? I did it consistently every night.

Then last night/ morning when I slept at like 2am? I felt drawn to my new dragons blood crystal I got recently, even though this Crystal I hadn’t cleansed and changed it yet, since it was the beginning of Yule as well and I’d just meditated prior I decided I’ll do a quick cleanse and charge so I can use it. I usually fall asleep holding a Crystal in either hand - one being my labradorite absolutely connected to me and one being whatever I felt drawn to. So I quickly cleansed and charged it then I sprayed my little bottle of water 4 times & said “this is my shifting spray I will now shift tonight.”

Four other things to note -

1. I have insanely impressive dream recall

2. I have briefly lucid dreamt before but not as intense/proper as this

3. Lucid dreaming method of shifting like creating a portal in your lucid dream to shift I’ve always thought was cool but never fully fully tried to do it because I’ve always believed that intent is the only thing you need to shift so just sleep with the intent to wake up whenever I’m not a big fan of “methods”

4. And finally for the last week or so I’ve begun doing reality checks every day not being phased by how fast or long I began lucid dreaming (detached from outcome like I wasn’t TRYING to lucid dream for my shifting immediately I just began doing it KNOWING that it’d happen!)

NOW we get to my dream part, I go to sleep dream and dream and dream

TW: next part mentions the term abuser

SO I was at my abusers house in the dream (whom I’ve now moved out/away from because I deserve the best!!) and they were doing a range of abusive things. I went into my room and stopped, I thought- wait I thought I already escaped them? Referring to my waking life how I HAD escaped them manifested living in a better place!! When I realised this I looked down at my hands and pushed my right hand through my left (my fav reality check) and it went through & disappeared. I then counted 4 on my left and 5 on my right

I KNEW I was dreaming. I became lucid !!! I know many people forget they want to shift when they become lucid so I was grateful that I didn’t forget and it was one of my first thoughts. To further confirm that I was dreaming I grabbed a pen and tried writing my name on my palm and it came out as a different name entirely?? Astrid. It was hard to read. Then I begun my portal moving my hands in my doctor strange type opening portal way saying “open portal to *DR NAME* open portal to my home *DR NAME*” like I practiced and I thought about how I want to try get my portal done quickly because I remembered that one story about a girl who became lucid then all these bad things started happening to her in it😭 I knew I was lucid dreaming and I knew the goal was to shift to my home!!

MY PORTAL OPENED. to some random place, I kept focusing on it and repeating “open portal to my home in *DR PLACE*” it glitched to a different place, this beautiful forest that did indeed look similar to home but there was a building with turned edges so when I awoke I believed that that was to like japan or something. I was SO SO close to shifting to my home through my lucid dream SO close. Then I woke up at 6:38am and I messaged my friend all about it immediately after it happened. I was so SO SO HAPPY.

Additionally, I explained how I held my new Crystal when I slept earlier because one of the benefits of dragons blood is massive assisting in manifesting one’s dreams / desires + opens 3rd eye + assisting in lucid dreaming & dream work WITH the combination of my labradorite’s endless assistance with raising consciousness helping with reality shifting manifesting etc etc etc. I’ve also been recently adding in “I lucid dream every night” into my affirmations lately manifesting so máster manifestor at work 😮‍💨😮‍💨‼️‼️literally manifested that instantly. (Like I always do)

SO I LUCID DREAMT. LIKE A PROPER PROPER LUCID DREAM AND I WAS A JUMP AWAY FROM HOME. A JUMP. A PORTAL A JUMP. SO INSANELY CLOSE

I had to come share it with you because I think you’ll find it interesting that I implemented what you’d begun doing with the spray and sentence intent into my routine and had success!!

Do you or do you have any post or does anyone reading this have any advice for shifting through lucid dreaming?? I honestly haven’t read much to at all about how to do it I just knew you could open portals to shift in them. I opened my portal and was repeating my intent- it looked like it was trying to get there but it was showing other places- does one just continue that? Any advice? :)

Also it shows how instant manifestation is and how I’d detached from the outcome and it came.

And if anyone is reading this needing motivation “your actions today create tomorrow’s future” you can literally have anything and be anything you want, it’s all going to work out I promise!!

ANYWAY THATS ALL

❤️‍🔥YOU EVIE

Xoxo

- Master Manifestor, Reality shifter & Lucid Dreamer of the multiverse.

HIIIIII ❣️❣️❣️

I AM SO STOKED FOR YOU !!!!!!

I am so happy that my „routine“ inspired you, and that you got so incredibly close to shifting 😻😻😻

unfortunately I have zero experience when it comes to shifting through lucid dreaming, especially because usually when I become aware that I am dreaming I automatically wake up, so it‘s definitely not my method of choice.

I am glad tho, to see that my message, that you manifest as soon as you just let the universe do its thing, has helped you on this journey ❤️❤️❤️

thank you so so so much for your story, and happy shifting 😽❤️

yours in every reality,

Evie <3

[dbgdbw]

530.Party In Progress (3)

파티 중 (3)

‘Aigo, I’m dying….’

As soon as I entered the break room, I collapsed face-first onto the sofa. Approaching me, Gyeolie and Peace asked me if I was okay. Of course, in Peace’s case, it was him going ‘ki-yang.’ Responding with an affirmative, I dragged over a cushion to wedge under my head, and settled into a comfortable laying-down position. 

‘...definitely took some of the wind out of my sails.’

Though I’d done what I could to try and prep in advance, there was very little that I could actually get involved in. While the lawyers on our side had made a conscientious effort to explain things to me in simple terms during our discussion, that side had, obviously, extended no such courtesy. And on top of that, the corresponding paperwork had only been generated in English, as though it were de facto procedure. Though I had been provided with a translation, when they had zero qualms about barrelling right ahead in English, I’d repeatedly been left scrambling in the dust while looking for the relevant text, having missed my window of opportunity. 

On the other hand, their lawyers were capable of reading Korean without any difficulties. So why couldn’t we just use Korean then! Of course, they would hardly entertain the prospect of giving up an advantage, but.

- Appa, are you very tired?

- 끼앙.

“No, it’s just that… It really is a whole ‘nother ball game when it comes to expertise on a subject matter, huh.”

The baseline itself was a different animal altogether. Though team lead Kim-nim had mentioned at the beginning that this was why you have a lawyer on retainer, to handle these types of things, and that there’s no need for Director Han-nim to be overly concerned about the proceedings. Well, they were the experts for a reason. Even those experts would probably feel out of their depths like I was, if it was outside of their respective wheelhouses.

Even so, I wondered if it would be better for me to pick up English. On second thought, relying on Myungwoo and the Newcomer was probably the more efficient route……. Why didn’t people just speak a universal language. In this era of globalization, we should be able to dialogue together. In Korean.

- Feels like a fever, maybe.

The fairy dragon said, pressing a tiny hand against my forehead.

“Probably ‘cause I’ve been preoccupied by a few things. It’s alright.”

How many hours on end had I been trapped there, anyway. It had started in the morning, and it was nearly dinnertime, now. Nor had matters been squared away; it really was ludicrous. This was why it was called ‘an endurance contest’, I supposed. Once lunch had ticked over and things had bled over into the afternoon, the accumulated fatigue had meant that my brain couldn’t even function properly anymore. Otherwise, they wouldn’t have opted to send me away earlier. ‘We’ll finish up for now, then, and resume tomorrow’… Though, it probably had been about time to wrap things up.

Honestly, wasn’t it insane. How many pages upon pages of red tape were they planning on generating, when the source material itself could be summed up so briefly. It seemed that they were hell-bent on producing a several-thousand word count book from what amounted to a single sheet of paperwork. Scary, lawyers were really scary. A type of scary that even a fear-resistance attribute couldn’t work against.

Gyeolie, who had been looking me over, picked up a phone that had been laying on the table. Seeing him appearing to covet the phone that belonged to Peace, I’d prepared a phone for Gyeolie, too. It was a flip phone, to make it easy to use even in his fairy dragon form. With the phone half-opened to support itself on top of the table, he began fiddling with it with a surprising ease.

- That bad guy is supposed to be released today, I saw.

“I’d mentioned no internet-surfing allowed, hadn’t I.”

- I only saw it because it was a headline, appa.

Even if I’d given him the phone, should I have blocked off the internet access on it first. Since, unlike Peace, Gyeolie could read Korean. Fishing out my phone, too, I skimmed over the files I’d received, that I had sorted away for later. There was heavy discourse regarding the matter of compensation, as well as the numerous added conditions. 

‘Direct requests of sacrifice from participants will not be permitted.’

This, too, was a new motion that had been introduced. It had been either Sung Hyunjae or Noah-ssi who had brought up the topic. It meant that, for example, the creation of a scenario where being unable to proceed unless one of the participants was dead would be prohibited. It was a measure designed to protect the physically weaker party members who would be at a disadvantage in such a situation, e.g. an F-rank–namely, myself. And there was another thing.

‘Participants may not be conferred disadvantages based on majority vote.’

Another addendum that had been introduced for my benefit. Though I may have had a few allies in the other contestants, when it came to the potential of an audience vote, well. Just imagining it was enough to make my eyes water.

‘It was a good decision to let them handle it instead, after all.’

With the slightest misstep, we might’ve ended up reduced to tatters before the first half was even concluded. And despite having labored as industriously as we had to expose and counter these hostile conditions, we couldn’t afford to let our guards down yet, still. Savvy individuals who possessed a deft hand at exploiting the loopholes in regulations kept popping up, and being on the offensive was infinitely easier than being the one rebuffing those attempts. 

Just then, the door opened, and Sung Hyunjae stepped inside. His hair neatly slicked back, wearing glasses, and dressed in a far more sedate suit than his typical garbs–rather than a guild leader, he resembled someone who worked in the legal field. Specializing in corporate law, particularly. Setting the right tone was important, when it came to something like this, was what he’d said, or something. Of course, it would have been far more convenient to simply force them to cave via the pressure exerted by an S-rank’s aura, but that method was obviously a no-go. 

“Looks totally like a, whatd’you call it.”

- A total dweeb.

Gyeolie sneered, sniggering. And just where had you picked up a word like that, huh.

“Your coloring has yet to recover, I see.”

As Sung Hyunjae began to approach, Gyeolie snapped his phone shut and flung himself in Sung Hyunjae’s path, as though to protect me. Peace, who had been lying at the foot of the sofa, lifted his head as well.

- Peace-yah, bite him!

- 그르릉.

Peace regarded Sung Hyunjae with a look of displeasure, but made no move to bite him.

“As things presently stand, it will likely prove beneficial for you to partake in this.”

Saying so, Sung Hyunjae held out the box he’d been carrying towards me. He wouldn’t have been able to leave and come back in that short span of time, so had he ordered some underling to pick it up for him, then. Placating Gyeolie as he pitched a fit, I opened up the box. An assortment of macarons in various colors had been delicately stacked inside.

“Here, Gyeol-ah.”

- Gyeolie can’t be won over by this kind of cheap ploy. Though I’ll eat it still, ‘cause it’s from appa.

Responding tartly, Gyeolie took the mint colored macaron handed to him. Sweets work a treat to take the edge off of fatigue, no, Sung Hyunjae said, taking a seat while pulling off his glasses. Like Noah-ssi, rather than being an indicator of poor eyesight, the glasses he wore were a preventative measure for their advanced sight. Since his vision wasn’t as sharp as Noah-ssi’s, he typically forgoed their use; but because today, we’d be spending all day pouring over an endless flow of words, well.

Owing to that, not only Noah-ssi and Sung Hyunjae, but Section Chief Song-nim and Hyuna-ssi had all ended up modeling glasses. Even if they weren’t a necessary measure, it was still more comfortable than going without, or something. Yoohyunie seemed to own a pair as well, and it occurred to me that I should probably pick out a set for Yerimie, too. Once she hit her third year of high school(1), wouldn’t Yerimie become deeply entrenched in her studies. Though there was a chance she’d decide to opt out, I supposed.

“I had hoped to petition for indirect sacrifices to be barred as well, in addition to the direct demands for sacrifice, in truth.”

“It stands to reason that it would broaden the parameters beyond an acceptable threshold in that case though, sir. Then, even in a situation as innocuous as presenting two biscuits to two individuals, it could be argued that they had been coerced into a situation where one of them had been indirectly forced to make a sacrifice by proxy–something like that.” 

“As, ordinarily, both persons would simply take one each to resolve the matter, but you–Han Yoojin, lad–would not.”

“I do plan to make use of them as well, sir.”

“And if the biscuit in question were capable of raising one’s stats, and it so happened that either the young master or the little lady were by your side?”

“That’s, well… One of them eating it instead would result in better long-term returns, objectively speaking.”

That was the truth, wasn’t it. Rather than a shortsight attempt at raising my own measly stats to E-rank or D-rank, it would be far more constructive to be able to boost Yoohyunie or Yerimie to SS-rank instead. Sung Hyunjae looked at me with a ‘see, what did I say’ sort of expression. The fuck, it really was the most logical route of action, though.

“Particularly with that sort of mark branding your throat, mind.”

Reflexively, I touched my neck. I’d left the vibrant bruising there in full view, as though openly inviting Chatterbox’s delegates to drink in their fill. Since it was evidence of the damage I’d suffered, as a result of Chatterbox’s actions.

“...I’ve already gotten an earful from the others on the matter, sir, thank you very much.”

“But even then, lad–you’ll simply repeat the same pattern when confronted with the same scenario, I imagine.”

“Truth be told, though, it really was a golden opportunity–isn’t that right, sir. And it was nothing dangerous, at that.”

- …appa, don’t force me to side with that thing.

Gyeolie groused, face screwed up in a petulant look; and, skin-crawlingly enough, Sung Hyunjae gave a most benevolent smile. 

“Sung-Han–”

- AAAAAAAAAHH! ACK! ACK! ACK!

Gyeolie flung the remaining half of the macaron at Sung Hyunjae at full force. Easily catching the offending macaron, Sung Hyunjae simply held it back out to Gyeolie in a seemingly kindly way. Squawking angrily, the fairy dragon made a beeline towards the far side of my shoulder, away from Sung Hyunjae.

“I believe I’d asked that you refrain from antagonizing him, sir.”

“Simply a display of my charitability, wouldn’t you say. In fact–I’ve acquiesced to accept but a measly return on its inclusion, no. As part of my team.”

I could hear the faint sound of Gyeolie’s pained whinging. Good grief.

“I’ve yet to give my assent to it as his guardian, sir. Gyeolie doesn’t have to be involved, alright?”

Though Chatterbox wasn’t part of the Benign King’s faction, you never knew. He might end up becoming more curious about the fairy dragon’s unique existence. And on top of that, Gyeolie’d had a hand in the Benign King’s death as well… Had it been up to me, I absolutely would’ve ordered him to stay away from this, but Gyeolie could be stubborn as anything. He’d mentioned that me being forced to go by myself, was even more reason for him to follow along.

At first, he’d insisted that he could pretend to be a pet dragon, rather than a party member, in order to be allowed to accompany me. Though it wouldn’t have been possible anyway, on account of the invitation counting each dragonkin as an ‘individual’ as well.

“Director Han-nim, you doing alright?”

As the door swung open again, Moon Hyuna, then Song Taewon stepped into the break room as well.

“And Noah-ssi, ma’am?”

“He’s seeing Chatterbox’s envoys off. Volunteered for the role, saying it’d be better off to have him do it, than making Section Chief Song-nim.”

During the proceedings, Noah-ssi had displayed a diplomatic side that was leaps and bounds beyond my expectations, all considered. The French Hunter world displayed similarities to the Anglo-American one, after all; and in his capacity as the Vice Guild Leader to Liette, he’d been exposed to a vast amount of literature regarding legal proceedings, apparently. Practically speaking, he probably stood on par with Sung Hyunjae when it came to Korean(2) Hunters who could parley on even ground with the Hunters from that side. 

Liette, well… Likely hadn’t seen a point in resolving matters with litigation, probably. Which meant that Noah-ssi was likely to have been burdened all the more, as a result.

“And what’s Sung Hyunjae gone and said now, to get our little dragon all puffed up like this.”

“I was in the midst of proposing to Director Han Yoojin-nim, you see.”

“Hyung-nim, someone who sees fit to pursue a person not even in the ballpark of their own zodiac cycle, is low-life scum.”(3)

Wearing a smile, Moon Hyuna took a seat next to me. 

“He's barking mad, clearly. Though I am thirty, that matter aside.”

“That so? What d’you think about a younger partner, in that case?”

What was with the abrupt–, …then, my eyes locked with Hyuna-ssi’s. A smile still playing on her lips, her eyes slowly scanned down my person. ‘A younger partner’–that was to say–since I’d just mentioned being thirty, what she meant was……. Suddenly, it felt like the back of my neck had been set ablaze.

“Ah, c’mon, sir–I’ve said that you shouldn’t tease me like this, haven’t I.”

“Don’t like it, then?”

“I’m not opposed, but… At any rate. Ah, honestly.”

I got that it was just joking around, but it was still bad for my heart. When Hyuna-ssi was looking at me with that face, wearing that sort of expression, and talking about younger partners……..

“That’s right–Section Chief Song-nim seemed incredibly adept at navigating foreign Hunter laws as well. I was slightly taken aback.”

“...there had been a precedent set that necessitated familiarity with the subject matter.”

Song Taewon spoke, a sigh mingling with his words. Ah, so it had been because of Sung Hyunjae. As Sung Hyunjae made a quip about Section Chief Song-nim certainly being particularly adroit, playing the ‘I’m completely oblivious’ card, Moon Hyuna guffawed.

“Section Chief Song-nim definitely ended up taking the brunt of it, when Sung Hyunjae first began stirring up trouble overseas. There was even an instance when I gave them a lift on my private plane, in fact.”

“You had, Hyuna-ssi?”

“I’d needed to tend to a matter, and our paths happened to coincide along the way, y’see. And in the face of an incident caused by Sung Hyunjae, what could a poor government worker or Hunter Association staff member possibly hope to do to mitigate things, especially if they’re not an S-rank. So it all fell to Section Chief Song-nim, when it was all said and done. He used to be real adorable, back then. It might’ve only been for a brief period, but there was a time where even he used to wear the dazed expression of a lost child, too, would you believe?”

My apologies to Section Chief Song-nim, but I kind of wanted to be an audience to it, too. The first time Section Chief Song-nim had had to venture overseas on account of Sung Hyunjae–it must’ve been an incredibly disorienting time, being forced to meander like that.

“Hyuna-ssi, your English skills seemed to be outstanding as well.”

As Yoohyunie had ended up having to go on a Dungeon raid he’d been putting off, Yerimie had been projected to accompany me, alongside Noah-ssi. But saying unnie, I’ll conduct the Dungeon raid for you instead!, she had requested Hyuna-ssi look after me as a proxy.

“Despite the current state of my affairs, I’d received a lot of love calls from overseas too, y’know. Pre-Awakening, I mean.”

“...should I be applying myself as well, then, after all.”

“There’s no downside to it, really. And it’s fine to leave it to others for now, but you really should consider university still.”

Moon Hyuna spoke solemnly. 

“Things being what they are, it’s a good idea for you to enroll. Feel free to push it off a while longer if the Party doesn’t pan out well, but barring that–unless you’ll face pushback for going, you should absolutely start attending.”

Saying that I should at least make an effort to begin preparations in spite of the year having nearly drawn to a close, she slung an arm around my shoulders.

“People may not be capable of achieving perfection, but it’s still a good idea to minimize the number of flaws one possesses. If you can whittle ‘em down, then you should reduce ‘em.”

“There’ll be talks of preferential treatment, most likely.”

“That’s all temporary. And besides, Hyung-nim is plenty deserving of preferential treatment, I reckon.”

Well, that’s. Should I actually be considering enrolling for real then, after all. Though there was still a bit of time left before the new year rolled over, it already felt anxiety-inducing. When was the cutoff for university applications, again. The testing season was over, so would it be around the time deposits were due, right now? They said that a lot of places had an open enrollment ongoing, nowadays. Because Yoohyunie had Awakened before hitting his third year of high school, I was murky on the details.

In the meanwhile, Noah-ssi had slipped into the break room as well.

“Noah-ssi, you’ve been working very hard.”

“Ah, it’s no trouble at all. And Yoojin-ssi, you’ve been exerting yourself a fair bit as well.”

Noah-ssi, too, had cleaned up nicely in a business suit. It fit him like a glove, honestly. To be frank, the term ‘nobility’ seemed to apply perfectly in this instance. And even then, he’d been as cutthroat as anything in the midst of actual negotiations. Once again, I felt immensely grateful for Noah-ssi’s involvement with the rearing facility.

But backtracking a bit–if I did come to enroll in university, did that mean Noah-ssi and I would end up becoming year-mates(4)?

“As it has been announced that the parameters for the Party are set to be released in three days’ time, please make certain to have concluded your preparations by then.”

Song Taewon informed all of us. 

“The event location will be announced shortly, tomorrow.” 

We’d received word ahead of time, through a representative. The place where Chatterbox’s party was set to take place was none other than the United States. I’d entertained the possibility, on account of all the threads leading back to that place, but to think it really would be held in the U.S.. 

“Hunter Sung Hyunjae–has Hunter Liette’s participation in this matter been confirmed?”

“Just so. Seeing as an SS-rank bow hangs in the balance, I imagine.”

“Section Chief Song-nim, would you be granted leave for this, sir? The U.S. is quite far, after all.”

“In light of Hunter YoonYoon’s presence, I believe it will be permitted.”

“Ah, that’s true.”

Since, even if it was taking place in the U.S., he could make it back to Korea in the blink of an eye. Then, it seemed YoonYoon would be making an excursion out to the United States, too. He probably hadn’t gone to the U.S. before, right? And it would be my first time there too, of course.

A brief discussion regarding the situation at hand stretched on for a bit longer, before it was decided that we should turn in early for the negotiations that would continue the following day.

And then, three days later, the details of Chatterbox’s Party were finally released.

- - - - -

(1) this would be senior year of hs (~entrance exam period) for her, bc of the way korea’s educational system is laid out: 

(2) yoojin makes it a point to identify noah, kang soyoung, and sung hyunjae as ‘korean Hunters’ re: their legal statuses/citizenship ambiguity (respectively), which is why he deliberately categorizes them as ‘domestic’ Hunters instead of ‘foreign’ whenever the subject comes up

(3) mha once again calling shj out on his questionable conduct, even if he’s being facetious in this instance, by framing it with the zodiac mention to put things in perspective: 

because it mirrors situations frequently created by korean men in positions of power irl:

remember how both moon hyuna and yoojin pointed out shj’s ‘people collector’ hobby as being a distasteful facet of his personality? and shj himself mentioning how his attention wandered towards yoojin in the first place because of a prior interest in yoohyunie, until yh didn’t give him the reaction he wanted–which then evolved into inserting himself with yj for leverage instead, after finding out his connection to yh/yj’s potential usefulness. shj’s intervention turns out to be benevolent for narrative purposes, yes, but it’s a deliberate subversion of expectations because of how contrary it is:

the point i’m making–the author is repeatedly identifying shj’s one-sided ‘forced affection’ towards yoojin to be a negative trait in-verse, as that’s how it’s intended to be perceived by the audience, because a good amount their interactions are largely a portrayal of how power+age differentials get abused in korea’s confucian society, particularly when people (including readers) dismiss yoojin’s genuine discomfort in various scenes. ‘it’s the implication,’ as background social commentary for the intended audience. that's why mha also segues into talking about the importance of yj continuing his education, too.

similar situations come up frequently enough in korea, after all:

+ more on ‘sponsorships’ in footnotes for ch197

(4) footnote on 동기 in ch203

[snackara]

Hey there! Sorry it took me so long, but I finally got my questions ready for your "Solomonar Chronicles"!

I remember that this series was inspired by how bad "Fantastic Beast" got after the first film. (which I get, the other two were such wasted potential) Is anything else from Harry Potter being used for inspiration for your series?

How did you come up with your character names?

Who would say is your favorite character that you made?

Do these characters get trauma like the ones in "Upon a Star?"

Are you going to do more Draconology Files? That one caught my interest the most since I'm studying dragon biology for a villain in my superhero story.

Would this be formatted like a regular book, or play out like a movie?

Is Solomonar Chronicles like a series with each chapter being an episode, or one large story broken up into chapters?

Why did you choose the 1920's for the setting? Its not a bad thing, I actually really enjoy stories set in that period. I'm just curious.

Will we see designs for the characters some day?

Any major villains coming up we should know about?

Are there other fantasy creatures in this world, or just dragons?

I was also curious about your "Dinosauroids Project" story too. I finished the first story of my "Visitors From Pangea" trilogy, so I'm curious how you would write a dinosaur based project.

In regards to original stories we're making, I'm currently creating one called "SuperZeroes", where its a story inspired by all the CBM I grew up with. Not sure if you're into heroes, but I was hoping I could share some stuff I have with you? At least while I'm still building the world and characters.

Thank you! 🐶

Oh hell yeah, ask away!

I took a lot of inspiration from problems I found in the world-building. If you want an in-depth look at the flaws in the Wizarding World, I highly recommend this video. It’s very long, but very good. The main flaw I wanted to tackle with this series is the whole Statue of Secrecy, and how it’s more harmful than helpful for mages and non-mages alike. Also this is not a Harry Potter thing, but weirdly enough Deadpool and Wolverine had a heavy influence on the story.

I looked up lists of common names from the 1920s and picked out some that stood out to me for first and last names. Except for Atticus and Clara. Those two just sort of came to me.

Either Atticus or Jesse, it’s a tough choice. On one hand you have Atticus ,who’s deeply traumatized and scarred but over the course of the story slowly heals and finding good in the world again. And on the other is Jesse, who’s just an absolute sweetheart and so supportive of his lover.

Oh heavens no…it’s so much worse in this series. Just look at Atticus.

Yes, I have a couple in my drafts I’ve been meaning to work on.

Im hoping to get it published as a real book series someday, so it’s formatted like a normal novel.

More like a larger story broken up into chapters, for the most part.

Mainly because that was when the Fantastic Beasts trilogy was set. I’ll probably tie it into the themes of the story better with prohibition and the non-mage government, but for now that’s it. Shallow? Yeah. But it works.

I’ve been digging through concept art to use as references lately. So far the pickings are a little slim for how I envision dragons, but I still have some stuff.

Edward Donahue. He’s basically the head of the mage CIA but somehow worse (Keepers), is the strongest believer in keeping non-mages and mages separate, and oh yeah basically started all of this by killing William Torrence and burning half of Atticus’ face off. So yeah, not a great guy.

There are plenty. I’m not sure how I’ll fit them in at the moment, but they will appear, because I have some interesting interpretations. One fun idea I have is making fairies more like bugs than tiny humans.

It’s based of a theory originally created back in the 1980s by David Russell which explores the question of “What if dinosaurs never went extinct and involved human-like intelligence?” It’s a really fascinating concept that I’m surprised more people haven’t picked up on. My own story is based on concept art created by C.M. Koseman and Simon Roy. Unfortunately I don’t have a solid story yet, just some worldbuilding stuff.

Yes please

And thank you for the asks!

[fountainpenguin]

"And honestly, I think you're fine! I mean, you're beautiful... about 84% of the time!" (x)

---

New Dog's Life chapter today! ~ 3rd Life series fan-season

Chapter 21 - “Heat (Martyn, BigB)”

❤️ Read on AO3

💛 Start from Chapter 1

💚 More Pixels Imperfect fics

---

A frustrated Martyn is left alone to babysit the Fox Dragon’s eggs. He texts Grian, Scott, Cleo, Mumbo, and Ren, then gets in three fights within an hour.

Meanwhile, BigB checks if Impulse's new farm designs are ethical for the villagers involved and Bdubs walks in on a dynamic that catches him off guard. Huzzah for server hub politics!

(First 1,000 words under the cut)

---

InTheLittleWood - Phantom

Status: Bored

Acting captain of New Star Station's phantom hybrid flock

💙  🧡  💚

"Iron… water… charcoal… salt… Ugh." Martyn leans all his weight against the lab table, blowing his lips. "Wow, this would be so much easier if I had an admin panel- none of this back-and-forth rabble. Why don't I ever look these things up when I'm on-server?"

The fox eggs, being eggs, don't respond. Martyn had to peel his eyes from them to focus his attention on the lab table, though he keeps his tail resting on the ground, lightly wrapped around the nearest one. If someone flutters down on the flock roost platform, he'll hear them. And if someone creeps on tiptoes across the landing, the vibration will rattle up his spine. He's a great caretaker. This is going just swell.

And it's not a bad gig, actually, stuck up here on the clock tower... so long as you don't mind the squawking and banter of parrot hybrids in the southern park whose voices carry back all this way. Let them sing you the song of their people; we're all sparky-frustrated up here in Between. Gods, that stupid moon.

Grian: i maen its no surprise if its rough. wild phantom idle ambiance uses live young w/o eggs or nests. the hybrids were the same back in my world Grian: well undead young but ykwim Grian: like its your bat side and not your vulture side is what im saying Grian: or whatever else you are InTheLittleWood: k InTheLittleWood: thanks g Grian: yeah sure InTheLittleWood: wait how do undead hybrid babies work? Grian: ? were you born alive? InTheLittleWood: ?? I thought I was? I was adopted as an egg tho, I didn't hatch in Linda's nest. Never thought to ask "Hey Mum and Dad, was I born alive?"

He pats the nearby eggs as Grian starts to type. Should he put his crocs back on? Is it rude to put your smelly feet up on a spawn egg? They can't sense that, right? Nah… They're not even born yet. The very beginnings of a soul might be in there (Maybe? He's not sure how it works), but they only hatch once an account links up to them. This clutch only has a few dozen eggs.

Martyn rests his hands on his stomach, counting down the ticking seconds. Thousands and thousands of eggs hatch every day, more or less in the order they were laid by one of the 98 dragons across Between. Sometimes siblings and camera twins are born the same species. Sometimes another dragon dropped a few of her own in a nest at the same time, so there's a split.

On rare occasion, two souls bundle in a single egg- That's where you get identical twins like Grian and Two. How much longer before these foxes start spawning? It can't be long now.

Gods, imagine if every single one hatches two souls… That'll be at least 60, 70, 80 fox hybrids scampering around up here. I should probably take them down to ground level. The base of the tower is a big empty room, offering nothing but the stairs and the doorway out.

Grian: i think mumbo said the phantom dragon carries the eggs in her throat pouch Grian: its what the alligator dragon does and she lives in the swamp near mumbo's spawner with joels mom InTheLittleWood: Suddenly I think I owe my parents some cards and gifts. I knew adopting phantoms was rare but I didnt realize grabbing an egg probably means crawling inside Linda's mouth and escaping before she bites you, geez 😳 InTheLittleWood: unless they just got my egg right after it was laid Grian: when the spawnlings hatch they eat the souls shes been carrying in there Grian: lol Grian: i mean mumbo got paid the big $ to do egg stealing runs, its why he had the last allay aggs Grian: eggs

Martyn lifts his brows, staring at his comm screen. If you measure by years instead of levels, he's older than Mumbo. Mumbo definitely didn't grab his egg, but how weird would that be? You marry the man who kidnapped you as a baby… That's just weird.

Granted, he does hail from a well-off family. The term "well-off" is ambiguous when you're off-server, but the gist is that his parents actually do have diamonds whereas most of Between's natural resources have been picked over out in the wild.

Growing up, he always just assumed his parents ended up with a phantom egg because that's what they bid for when the adventurers - usually, but not always wandering traders - went out on adoption runs to the dragon nests. His mum's an otter hybrid and his dad's a raven: a rare predator and a rare scavenger most people don't even know are native in the game.

Otter code was prepped for Minecraft Dungeons, but never made it beyond early concepts. Nonetheless, they exist. They're called a Tweenborn mob- something meant to exist, but never truly crossed into one of the main dimensions. Ravens actually did make it into the Dungeons spin-off, but only went public as cosmetic pets. You don't fight them, but they hang around anyway.

Most people thought his parents were modded and would do a double-take if they ever mentioned the Otter Dragon or Raven Dragon, who rarely get the mental pings to build nests and lay eggs. Growing up, they used to introduce Martyn as "their phantom kid" and urge him to show the wings and his baby fangs.

Was I a trophy kid? he wonders now. He wouldn't put it past them. Love his parents he may, but they did chase a lot of status symbols. Being rich enough to afford what must've been a wizard-level egg retrieval - potentially from the depths of Linda's gular pouch - may have been too good to resist.

Martyn stares a little more, rubbing his thumb across the edge of his communicator. I haven't seen my parents since before my EVO days. Maybe he should go. He can fly fast and be back in a snap. Would Scott allow that?

I guess it doesn't hurt to ask.

[Full chapter on AO3 - Link at top]

[ejzah]

In Miss Blye’s Class, Part 27

***

Kensi stayed for dinner and while Deeks cleaned up. Over the course of the evening, Caleb slowly opened up a little more, even breaking a couple of smiles.

Deeks thought at least a part of his continued reserved behavior came down to embarrassment. While Deeks appreciated that Caleb recognized what he did was wrong, he also didn’t want him to wallow in guilt.

When he had finished cleaning the few dishes used for the pizza, and packed up the half-finished meal he’d started, Deeks made his way into the den. He found Kensi and Caleb with their backs to the door, bent over a book. He stayed in the doorway watching them interact, and listened to the rise and fall of Kensi’s voice more than the words.

“Wait, did you forget to read the fine print!!!!” Kensi exclaimed.

“They ate spicy salsa on accident and now it’s going to make them breathe fire,” Caleb announced in between giggles. “And then the whole house is gonna burn down.”

Deeks smiled as he recognized one of Caleb’s most favorite books. Even if it had be a crappy couple of days, he had a lot to be grateful for. Mainly the two people crouched over a book about dragons. He waited for them to finish before interrupting with a gentle clearing of this throat.

“Hey kiddo, it’s getting close to bedtime,” he said, and both Kensi and Caleb’s heads swiveled towards him.

“We were having so much fun, we completely lost track of time,” Kensi said, nudging Caleb with her knee. “I better get home. Have good night, ok?”

“Ok. Thanks for reading with me, Kensi.” He dipped his head, peeking up from under his bangs. “Can I hug you?”

“Of course.” Leaning forward, he wrapped his arms as tightly as he could around Kensi, clinging to her for several long moments. When he let go, Kensi brushed his hair back with a fond smile that made Deeks’ chest ache in a way that wasn’t physical. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Bye, Kensi,” he said.

“I’ll walk you out,” Deeks offered. “I’ll be back in a couple, buddy.”

Caleb nodded, turning back to the small pile of books and trains scattered nearby.

“Ugh.” Deeks rubbed his palms over his face as he and Kensi reached the front door. “This is not how I imagined today going.”

“Hey, we’re all going to have bad days. Compared to some of my other relationships, this is actually not that bad.

“Very reassuring.” Holding out his hand, Deeks waited for Kensi to thread her fingers through his. “I should have told you about Monica sooner,” he added.

“Yeah,” Kensi agreed. “But I also understand why you didn’t.” She sighed, her smile a little melancholy. “Exes are hard. Especially when there are kids involved.” She tugged lightly on his hand. “Let me know if you need anything. Talk, yell, cry. I’m here and I promise not to judge.” She nodded. “Well, not too much.”

Deeks chuckled, and shook his head. “I love you.”

“Love you too,” she told him, leaning in for a brief kiss. “Good luck with your talk.”

Deeks shut the door behind Kensi, dragging both hands through his hair. He’d been thinking about how to approach this conversation all evening, and still wasn’t settled on what to say. He walked back to the den; Caleb had cleaned up everything, with more care than usual.

“I’m ready to go to bed,” Caleb announced.

“Come here for a minute,” Deeks said, sitting in one of the chairs, and Caleb hung his head, shuffling over reluctantly. He stopped with his still lowered, which just made Deeks want to wrap him up in a big hug. He pulled Caleb onto his lap, settling him on one knee.

“Kensi said you told her you were upset about mom and that’s why you got mad and threw the block. Is that true?”

Caleb shrugged once, and then gave a single jerk of his head, still not looking up. Deeks gently tipped his chin up. The were the sheen of tears in his eyes.

“Why didn’t you say anything to me?”

“I don’t know.” Another shrug.

“You know you can tell me anything,” Deeks reminded him. Caleb didn’t respond, so he prompted. “Why are you upset about mom coming to visit?”

“Because you always get sad when she does,” Caleb answered, with a hint of sadness and bitterness, which had no place in a five year old’s voice. “I like it when we’re happy. And I like having Kensi here, and I don’t want it to change.”

Deeks blinked at him in shock for a moment as he processed everything Caleb had just revealed. He’d tried to conceal his true feelings about Monica, but apparently he hadn’t been as successful as he thought.

“Hey, first of all, you do not have to worry about how I’m feeling, Caleb. That’s not your job, ok? If you wanna see mom, then that’s what we’re going to do. It doesn’t matter how it makes me feel.” He tapped Caleb’s chin, until he made eye contact again.

“Secondly, mom coming back isn’t going to change anything with Kensi,” he said.

“You promise?” Caleb whispered hopefully.

“Yeah, I do.” He let that sink in for a few seconds. “So, what do you think about mom visiting again while she’s here?”

Caleb considered the question with a tilt of his head. “I don’t know. I have to think about it.”

“That’s fine. It’s always good to think about things before you make a decision,” Deeks said approvingly. As they talked, Caleb had slowly melted into his chest. He could tell he was fading fast.

“Hey, one more thing.” Deeks rested his hand on Caleb’s back. “I know you weren’t feeling like yourself when you threw that toy today at school, but that can’t happen again, ok?”

Caleb nodded into his chest, sniffling a little.

“It’s never ok to hurt people, even when we have really big feelings. If you feel like you did today again, you come talk to me, or Kensi, or another grown up,” he told him.

“Ok. I’m sorry, daddy.”

“I forgive you. We still gotta make it right though, so tomorrow I want you to apologize to your friend, and Kensi.”

“That’s all?” Caleb asked in surprise.

“First time offender,” Deeks joked, hugging Caleb tighter. “It happens again though, there’s gonna be more consequences. Like losing privileges.”

“Ok,” Caleb whispered again, curling his fingers into Deeks’ shirt.

“Love you, kiddo.” Kissing the top of his head, Deeks held him closer. A few minutes more wouldn’t hurt.

***

A/N: And of course, the book referenced in this chapter is the wonderful “Dragons Love Tacos” by Adam Rubin and Daniel Salmieri. It’s been a staple for me ever since Eric read it during one of his story time videos.