#should beg for my forgivness and im not joking i mean it i mean it i mean it i mean it i mean it i mean it i mean it i mean it i mean it i m | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

sanspuppet · 1 year ago

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Another 18+ scenario of San because i can't stop thinking of him and his huge chest.

smut, angst

Jealous/angry San: hard, rough sex

You entered into San's dorm, which he shared with his bestfriends, during the university year. He wasn't there, and you knew it, because he had one other class before the school day would finish. You looked around, searching for someone to talk with, when you noticed Mingi was laying on the couch, watching his phone. You saw his eyes staring at your body through the corner of his phone, it was quite understandable, given the length of your miniskirt, showing completely off your legs. Something went wrong in your head, and a sudden thought of you sitting on him, flowed in your mind.

"Hi Mingi! What are you watching??"

"Uhm... a f-film." he couldn't stop looking at your exposed skin, at the revealing tank top you were wearing, all for teasing him and his friends.

"Can i join you?" you asked, approaching him with an innocent smile, while taking off your shoes.

"S-sure." he only could respond, he knew what was your purpose, and he also knew it was completely wrong. But you wanted just to watch a film, right? He couldn't refuse, so you instantly sat next to him, your left hand resting on his tight. After some minutes, knowing that San would come back soon, you choose to make things a mess, like you were doing for some days:

"Min, i can't see clearly, can i sit on your lap?" you asked looking at him with your puppy eyes.

"Uhm... i dont think it's a good idea..." his nervousness growing under his oversized sweatshirt.

"Pleaaaseee Min" you begged him, already moving on top of him. You could feel heartbeat speeding up, so you layed your back against his chest. The film was catchy, but your focus was only on the face San would have seeing you like that. You started to rub yourself against Mingi's lap, and you could immediately feel his boner growing harder, under your panties.

And it was when, you heard the door closing, and saw a strong figure staring at you: San.

"H-hi bro..." Mingi's face was red for the embarrassment (and for how hard you made him "involuntarily")

"Hi Sannie!" on the contrary, you smiled as if nothing was happening.

"My room. Now." was the only thing your boyfriend replied, and a smirk was placed on your face once you were following him.

He shutted the door behind him, angry. The look in his eyes was intimidating, you could tell he was really upset.

"Tell me, kitten. Why the fuck do you keep teasing the others?" he said with a strange calmness.

"San- i-" you tried to say something, despite you perfectly knew he was not expecting an answer.

"Wanna behave like a slut, huh?"

You always thought your boyfriend was a calm and kindhearted person, so much that you questioned yourself if he would ever get upset with you. That's how you started to slightly tease his bestfriends, and see if he'd get jealous, and oh yes, he really would, but that stupid little joke turned in a serious way, when he decided that you had reached the limit.

"You like to rub yourself against Mingi's cock, with that little slutty skirt of yours, huh?"

"No please- i didn't mean-" you immediately felt scared, realizing that you maybe had exaggerated.

"You know you got him so hard, do you?"

"San, im so-" you got goosebumps, as he grabbed your hips with one hand, squeezing them with his fingers, so desperately that it would probably leave bruises on your skin.

"Shut up, i better mark you as mine, right?" He walked a few steps towards you, and placed his index finger under your chin, forcing you to look at him. But the only thing you could do was staring at the floor, too embarrassed to even see his mad face, you were used to a sweet San, who cuddled and praised you everytime he could, his angry look, was now seriously scaring you.

"Fucking look at me, what? Now you feel guilty?"

"Y-yes..." was the only thing that escaped from your mouth, you were trembling under his stare.

"Oh we'll see if i should forgive you, take your clothes off."

"But...Mingi-"

"Huh? What? you want him to join? You'd like to be fucked like him, yeah?"

"No i didn't mean that-"

"It seems like, seeing you behaving like a whore."

Tears started to fall from your eyes, you've never seen him like this, making you realize you've really messed up. You wanted to apologize but you knew he wouldn't forgive you, not until he could hear you screaming for him. San grabbed your hips with both of his hands, and threw you on his bed with force. His look was cold, like he didn't feel anything for you now, he was extremely upset, and you could tell it.

"I said, clothes off. Want me to call one of my friends to do it for you? You little slut."

"N-no, i can do it myself." you almost choked with your saliva, panicking by the thought he hated you by now. You got immediately naked, under his gaze.

"Spread your legs."

"Yes d-daddy-" when you called him like that he used to like that, so you thought it would somehow help his angst.

"Dont call me like this." He said before lefting the bedroom. When he came back, behind him was standing another person: Mingi. You gasped and instantly tried to cover yourself with your arms. San chuckled:

"What? Never seen a slut being shy for her naked body."

"San- i really-"

"He'll watch. If that's what you really want, he will see how much of a whore you can be, maybe you'll learn something."

"Uhm... San i dont think i should watch-" Mingi said, hesitant.

"Yes. You should." San replied, making him sit on the armchair, in front of the bed.

You eyes were now red from how many tears have fallen from your eyes. You barely cared about Mingi's presence, what you really wanted now, was your sweet San.

"Please im sorry San..."

"i'll forgive you once you'll be completely emptied from your cum." he started to untie his belt, and dragged down his jeans.

"San. Mingi has nothing to do with it, let him go." You tried to look more serious, hoping you'd convince him. In facts, he turned back and looked at Mingi. San rolled back his eyes, sighing:

"Okey, leave."

Mingi instantly stood up and left you two alone. San got closer to you, his face a few inches from yours, you could feel his deep breaths against your skin.

"If i fuck you mercilessly, you'll learn your mine, right?" he took your neck in his hands, squeezing it slightly.

You nodded, preparing yourself. He sat on the bed behind you, and dragged his hands down on your body, until they reached your clit. He whispered in your ear:

"One orgasm for each day you kept flirting with my friends, this is for Tuesday." he suddenly slided three of his fingers inside your pussy, pounding them into you relentlessly. His other hand keeping your leg still, while the tip of his fingers were touching your g-spot at every thrust.

"Come on, i know you'd like to moan, don't you? Fucking scream for how much you enjoy to be fucked."

The only thing you could do now was obeying, he had you, he owned you. You groan extremely loud, when he sped up his pace even more, his fingers rubbing against every single part of your walls.

"That's it, that sounds exactly like a slut."

"Please- San- im c-close-" you kept moaning, your body started to shake by the immense pleasure: he has never touched you like this.

"Already? That's so humiliating, how sensitive your pussy is." He placed his other hand on your clit, moving his fingers in a circular motion, harshly. Your pussy clenched intensely around his fingers as you felt your first orgasm coming. And in no time, you completely wetted San's hand. You've never released so much cum in your entire life, and it felt incredibly good.

"I should clean this mess up." he said, and moved in front of you, on his knees, his eyes facing your throbbing pussy.

"W-wednesday?" you trembled, knowing you probably couldn't take again all of that pleasure, since you still had to get off of your recent high.

"That's it." His lips were now placed on your clit, kissing and sucking it. Then he licked your walls with his warm tongue, sliding it inside you a few times. You arched your back, your eyes shutted as you tried to ignore all the pleasure that was taking the control of your body, you couldn't stop shaking, your fingers gripping the fabric of the blankets, desperately.

"So fucking wet, all because of me, right?" he asked you. Despite you were too fucked out to respond.

"Right?" he repeated, squeezing your pussy with his fingers.

"Y-yeah! F-fuck-" you choked.

He looked at you, smirking. His tongue was now rubbing against your folds relentlessly, licking them like it was his last meal, the tip of his nose pressing against your clit. His hands were keeping your legs opened widely. You were already reaching your climax again, so quickly that it was embarrassing. You couldn't help but scream his name:

"San! San- please! Im yours-"

He groaned, and let his fingers pleasuring you.

"Don't try to escape it like this. You have 2 days left." he said, before you squirted on his face, exhausted. He licked his lips, tasting it, and took his remaining clothes off. His dick was standing straight, his tip red, thick and pulsing for how hard he was.

"Doggy style." obviously, he loved seeing your ass slapping against his hips, everytime he fucked you. You immediately placed yourself on your hands and knees, barely standing, because of the tiredness. He didn't wait before taking his dick inside of you, already thrusting in you deeply.

"Thursday."

A couple of minutes passed, before you felt your walls pulsing and clenching way too much around his dick, warning him you were hitting your orgasm once again. God, poor Mingi, the amount of screams and groans he was forced to hear, it definitely seemed like a pornographic film stage.

San's thrusts became sloppy and messy, segnaling he was close too.

"Gonna fill this pussy with my cum, and you'll take all of it." he said, before releasing inside of you, until his cum was sliding out of your folds. You layed your chest on the bed, too tired and fucked out, that you couldn't even think concretely.

"i-i can't-" you tried to murmur.

"Oh yeah, you can. You'll regret what you did to Mingi."

"s-sorry. i'm s-sorry."

"I know, i know. Just take it one more time, ok baby?"

Baby, that fucking word convinced you.

You tried to nod, turning yourself so you could face him. He looked at you, his stare was now more relaxed, and less angry, which it made you cheer up a bit.

"Good. I give you some seconds before the next round."

He layed on the bed, beside you, looking at you. His hand was resting on your tummy.

"Why did you do it?" he asked, with a sad tone.

"T-that was stupid, im sorry..."

"I asked you why."

"B-because you were just too kind, was thinking if you would ever get angry with me."

"Why would i? you're perfect."

You turned your head, looking at him, tearing.

"Im so sorry San, i swear i only want you."

He got closer to your ear, and whispered:

"I know it, i'll try to be more gentle now. Okey?"

He said, before sliding his cock inside of you again. He threw his head back for the amount pleasure, and moaned your name.

"You're so weird y/n... but i still love you."

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i highly recommend this song, don't know.. it's just sooo good and they need more recognition :/

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houpss · 10 months ago

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Dawg I’m actually begging crying on my knees for you to do a reverse version where like reader dies protecting skz 😭😭😭 ofc obvi no pressure, like only if you’d like to 🙏🏻🩷 you write so well im like obsessed

ububububu.....I'm very pleased to hear this! thanks for the idea, love 🩷🫂

I'm eating strawberries and crying, I literally feel bad about this job 😭😭😭

SKZ's reaction to your death ver. hyung line

maknae line

It pains me to write this work, my heart breaks and I begin to believe in this nonsense... BUT REMEMBER THAT ONLY PERSONALITIES ARE TAKEN FROM THE REAL SKZ, EVERYTHING REST IS FICTION!

Bang Chan

It happened...suddenly.

Chan returned home before you, he wanted to cook you dinner and then turn on a new movie that he recently found.

He knew that you were stuck at work, so he wasn’t too worried.

An hour has passed... you're gone, but you should be back by now. Two hours have passed, Chan is nervous.

He called you, you didn’t pick up, he called you so many times, but you didn’t hear.

At two o'clock in the morning he receives a call on his phone. He jumps out of bed, hoping it's you calling, but it's just an unfamiliar number.

He picks up the phone, he just hopes you're okay.

"Are you Bang Christopher Chan? I'm sorry..Y/N Bang died."

Chan thought it was a joke, a very unfunny joke.

He can only come to consciousness when he sees your body. Road accident, you didn't survive.

He will ask Changbin, Jisung and Hyunjin to come out quite aggressively, because they came with him.

He ran his fingers over your pale face, tears forming in his eyes. Impossible.

He strokes your hair, strokes your hands, stopping at your fingers...he squeezes your hand tightly. Why did you leave him?

Tears fall on your lifeless body, you would be very upset if you saw Chan crying.

They can only drag him out of your room in the morning, he didn’t want to let go of your body until the end, it was like he was possessed.

"No, don't take me...I have to stay with her! I don't want to be taken away from her"

"she’s probably so cold and scared... she’s alone there, she’s already lifeless.”

He blamed himself, he could have taken you away from work, but why didn’t you ask?

The exit from the hospital is filled with reporters and paparazzi, the shocking news shocked many: “Model and Actress, Bang Chan’s wife Y/N Bang died in a car accident.”

Thanks to the members, they protected Chan from reporters and endless paparazzi. Chan did not walk behind as usual, but in the middle, and a ring was created around the participant.

Chan doesn’t remember anything, he just cried, he cries so much and loudly.

The members refused to leave him, although he asked so. They went to the dorm.

A day has passed... two days have passed... a week has passed. Funeral.

He remembers everything very vaguely, he was the last one to kiss your forehead before the coffin lid was closed.

Now he is completely alone.

He eats very little and hardly leaves the room. Minho literally force feeds him.

Your photos are open on his phone, you are on his wallpaper.

He doesn’t want to live without you, he wants you so much.

His tears never dry, he cries constantly. There are no emotions inside him, he is dead.

He looked through your correspondence... his heart ached madly.

He just loves you so much, he loves only you.

He apologized profusely to your family, it was his fault.

In the end he won't cope and he will leave for you. Chan was found hanged in his room. There was a note on the table with the words: “I can’t live without her, I’m nothing without her... forgive me.”

Lee Minho

People come and go. The simple meaning of life

But you couldn't leave him...not you

If you loved, then you would not have left...WHY DID YOU LEAVE HIM?

Overdose of antidepressants.

He found you in your apartment, you were lying on the bed, wrapped in a blanket... you seemed to be sleeping, but your heart was not beating.

What if he had found you earlier?

He would have stopped you.

He found a letter next to you... your last will and love for him

"𝐈'𝐦 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐰𝐞𝐚𝐤...𝐈 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰"

"𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧'𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞, 𝐇𝐨"

"𝐈'𝐦 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐈 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐥𝐲. 𝐈𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞 𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐞."

IT'S NOT EASIER WITHOUT YOU

He has been crying for several days in a row. Even the members can't pull it out.

He became so aggressive and closed.

His heart rotted and broke without you

He falls asleep with your sweatshirt on, with your perfume on it.

The company releases a statement that Minho is taking an indefinite hiatus from activities.

He wants to close his eyes, open his eyes and have you next to him.

He went through many treatments with you and visited many psychiatrists.

You smiled at him so much, so what happened?

Minho cried for the first time in front of the members, everyone was broken with your death.

After your death, he smoked for the first time.

The cigarette smoke calmed him down at least a little. And in your dreams you came to him, you talked to him a lot.

He became very closed off to himself, even Jisung couldn’t get him to talk.

Everything and everywhere reminded him of you

Your bottle of perfume...your drawings, your rings, your elastic bands, your sweaters

You would curse if you saw him like this.

Only a month later, after your funeral, he dared to pick up your phone.

To mom, dad and sister: “I’m sorry that I’m so weak.. I would like a better life for you, I wanted to live better and happier. I’m a bad daughter.”

To SKZ:"Sorry...be strong, you are world stars and become even more popular..."

To Minho:"I repent of you, I hate myself for what I did. I have about ten minutes left...And in these ten minutes I will continue to love you, Lee Minho. Maybe we will meet in the next life?"

The emotions he had been holding back burst out.

He screamed, his scream deafening the silence.

Physical pain in his heart pierced him. how the bitch it hurts.

Now he's wearing your big jacket.

“Please protect me, Y/N.”

SEO CHANGBIN

"Police lieutenant Seo Y/N was shot..she died while intercepting a drug gang. The ambulance did not have time to arrive"

What did he just hear? Why are they saying your name?

Is this a mistake? Maybe they got it wrong?

He refused to believe it until he was asked to come to the morgue to identify the body.

Yes, you were lying there...a bullet in the forehead.

Changbin turned away, he couldn’t look at you. He's scared.

Probably then he realized all the pain, he stopped living.

Felix and Seungmin forcibly dragged him away from the morgue.

He was never against your work, he was just proud of you. Of course, his wife is a police lieutenant.

He knew it was dangerous, but could anything bad happen to you?

"Changbin, she died a hero, please...be the same hero for her."

There were so many people at your funeral, why did they all come?

Changbin felt lost, Chan was holding his hand. Changbin couldn't navigate the space.

Time doesn't heal anything, remember.

He lost the desire to exist

He hated your job after your death, it's all your damn job.

Will you protect Changbin? Are you his guardian angel?

From time to time he hears your voice.

He will come to your parents and ask for forgiveness.

Really, forgive him.

He will take your dog with him, it seems... the dog really misses you, where is his owner?

Changbin doesn't like music anymore, he stopped working out, he stopped eating.

"Y/N would be upset if she knew that you wanted to leave the group."

"She told you to create for the sake of people's happiness."

"WITHOUT HER THERE IS NO FUCKING THIS HAPPINESS..."

You would like him to continue writing and working.

He will stay for your sake... and for the sake of the members, these three months they kept him afloat, he literally clung to them.

Your dog now has 8 caring men

Changbin brings red Lilies, your favorite flowers, to your grave every week.

Hwang Hyunjin

You have been married for five years, recently celebrated your anniversary.

You were the happiest couple! STAY blessed couple , the participants were incredibly happy about your couple.

You found out that you are pregnant.

Hyunjin was incredibly happy! Members will become uncles to your baby.

Felix took the place of godfather.

Chan and Minho were responsible for choosing the name.

And Changbin, Jisung, Seungmin and Jeongin made rooms for your baby!

But...you had a back injury, which made it dangerous to give birth.

You didn't care, you were going to have the baby.

Difficulties began immediately during contractions, Hyunjin was with you all the time.

He was forced to leave the room in the middle of labor.

The members who were waiting in the corridor were very worried.

Sudden silence.

The doctor came out of the maternity room and said: “Congratulations, you have a daughter... please accept my condolences, your wife has died.”

What?

It sounded so absurd.

Hyunjin walked into your room, you looked so tired...so sad. sad aphrodite.

Hyunjin kissed your forehead, one hand on your neck, the other holding your hand.

"Thank you for daughter...and forgive me, I love you very much"

Tears rolled down Hyunjin's cheeks, the tears were like pearls.

Hyunjin went home with the members.. The workers left your daughter in the hospital for several days.

Hyunjin seemed to understand nothing, he understood absolutely nothing.

"The baby will grow up in love, Hyunjin"

"We will all take care of her..she is an extension of Y/N" These words from Chan hurt Hyunjin's heart...He will protect and love his daughter.

Hyunjin is always crying, his eyes are red, his face is swollen from crying.

It hurt even more when Seungmin brought your favorite coffee.

In three days we could pick up our daughter.

All eight participants went to the maternity hospital.

They brought out a small package for you, what a tiny little thing.

Hyunjin looked at the little baby as if he were the eighth wonder of the world, the girl was sleeping. Hyunjin could have sworn that she would look like you.

"We'll call her Viyoung" Why is this in tune with Vendetta?

The guy nodded approvingly, tears flowing down his cheeks again.

The members took turns holding the bundle with the baby in their hands.

"I will love you so much, Viyoung...just like your mother loved you."

“Your uncles will take care of you...you will grow up with complete love.”

They went home, everything will be fine. Your memory will never fade away. Hyunjin will raise a beautiful daughter. She's a copy of you, but with Hyunjin's eyes.

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candyswirls · 4 days ago

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Bat Fledgling - Pt 8: I Want You

Previous - Next - MasterPost

Summary: Corvus rectifies his mistake with Kiri

I gave you the hurt so here’s the comfort and fluff! He’s a good dad he’s just trying his best! Also the warband is extremely fun to write about.

He ran down the hallway, only backtracking to where Adile’s room was.

He knocked then opened the door. The three looked up at him, Adile still crying.

“Stop crying,” Corvus said. “He’s staying.”

Adile gasped loudly.

As Corvus moved down the hallway he heard him exclaim, “Yaaaaaayyy!!!”

He ran into the apothecarium so fast it startled Bora.

“Is something wrong my lord?” He asked.

“Where’s Kiri?” He demanded.

“I put him to bed,” Bora said as Corvus spun around.

“Uh, is everything alright?” He called after his Primarch.

“Yes!” He yelled back.

He rounded a corner and nearly ran into Jehudiel.

“Ah, my lord,” he began. “I must-“

Corvus grabbed him by his top shoulders, “Cease plans to send him away. He’s staying.”

Jehudiel smiled, “Right away my lord. I’ll begin preparations for having him here permanently.”

Corvus nodded, “Yes, that would be appreciated.”

He moved past the Ultramarine and ran again. He only slowed down as he approached Kiri’s room.

Edant was right outside with the mop and froze when he saw the Primarch. He jumped into a salute. This section was extremely well polished. More so than the others.

“I…” Edant stood up, “I- this was a very dirty section and- such a tough spot to buff out.”

“And I expect the rest of the base will look like this?” Corvus smiled.

Edant’s expression dropped.

“I-if you’d prefer it I can-“

Corvus raised a hand to silence, “I was joking.”

“Right,” Edant nodded. “I was also… joking- no I wasn’t. I didn’t want to leave him alone.”

The primaris slumped a bit, ashamed at lying.

He patted his son on the head, “At ease. Thank you for doing so. Go get some rest.”

“I-okay,” Edant nodded as he shuffled off, occasionally looking behind him.

He wondered if all Primaris were this nervous.

Corvus sighed and leaned in close to the door. From the sound of sniffling he could tell Kiri was still awake.

He knocked gently and slid the door open. Once he slipped in and closed it behind him he moved to the small cot.

His hearts sank. He could smell the blood from the scratches Kiri gave himself and that he had vomited on the bed.

He sat down next to the cot and spoke, “Oh, Kiri.”

The boy let out a sob and quickly turned over, “I’m sorry. I’ll clean it up. I can be good. I promise.”

“Kiri-“

“Please don’t send me away, please!” He begged. “I can be good! Don’t abandon me! I want to stay! I’ll be good! I’ll clean it up. I can clean it up.”

He tried climbing out of bed to action but Corvus gently pulled him into his embrace. Rocking him, rubbing his back, and resting his chin atop his head.

“Shhhh,” he hushed. “It’s okay. You’re not going. You’re staying here. I’m not sending you away.”

Kiri let out a loud hiccup, “R-really? You-you’re not?”

Corvus held him close to his chest as his own tears began to fall.

“Oh Kiri,” he sighed. “Im sorry. I’m so sorry. I never should have said those things. I didn’t mean it. You’re a good and sweet boy. My boy. You aren’t going anywhere. We’ll all take care of you. Golden throne. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.”

He pressed kisses to his face and hands. Kiri sobbed as he curled into Corvus.

“I’m so sorry,” he said to Kiri again. “You don’t have to always be good or obedient. You will always be here. This will always be your home. I will always be your father. I hope you can forgive me.”

Kiri sniffed, “I-I-I alr-ready do.”

That nearly sent him over the edge as he hugged him tighter.

“You’re so good,” he sighed. “I won’t ever get rid of you because I want you. I want you to stay and I want you here. I want you. You’re my son. I want you.”

Kiri let out high pitched cries as he clung to Corvus’ chest feathers.

“Don’t lie!” He mumbled into his chest. “Are you lying? Please tell me you aren’t lying!”

Corvus shifted his hold so Kiri was eye level with him. Large watery eyes hoping that it was all true.

“I’m not,” he laughed. “I want you. You’re my son.”

A big grin spread across Kiri’s face as he cried. He wrapped his arms around Corvus neck.

The Primarch stood, still rubbing his son’s back as he sobbed.

“Come on,” he said. “Let’s get you something to eat. You’ll sleep with me tonight.”

Kiri broke down more.

“Don’t cry,” Corvus soothed. “It’s all going to be okay.”

“They’re happy tears,” Kiri mumbled.

He nuzzled his son again as he took him out and went to the kitchens.

Griggs was always in the kitchen. It was rare to not find him there.

He was furiously punching dough.

“Is there any snacks-“ Corvus began to ask.

“Bottom left cabinet next the fridge,” Griggs said immediately. “Don’t touch the ones in the decorated basket, those are Adile’s and I’m not having him cry over textures ever again.”

“Thank you,” he said.

Kiri called out to the world eater, “I’m staying!”

Griggs stopped punching the dough and began gently kneading it, “That’s nice. I don’t have to change meal plans or prep.”

Corvus grabbed a cookie and gave it to Kiri. He spotted the mess in the baking room. Bits of eggs, batter, flour, and frosting covering nearly every surface including the ceiling. A baking massacre. An intricate and large cake was in the middle of a table. He elected to ignore that, not wanting to know exactly what had angered the Astartes so much to create that. He always cleaned up anyways.

Once they arrived back at his room, Corvus grabbed a blanket to wrap Kiri in.

“Wait!” He said as he clambered out of the Primarch’s arms. “I have to go to the bathroom.”

He ruffled his son’s hair then showed him the door to his personal one.

After he finished he came running out. He tripped and Corvus jumped up to grab him. Kiri was already scrambling to his feet.

“I’m okay!” He assured as he climbed into Corvus’ arms.

He wrapped him in a blanket and held him close to his chest. Baselines typically needed about eight standard Terran hours of sleep. Did younger ones need longer?

It didn’t matter, he had held him for days in traveling here. He’d do so now.

“Can we lay on the bed?” Kiri asked.

Corvus obliged, letting the boy lay on his chest as he leaned back.

“What’s that feathery thing?”

“What’s what?” He questioned.

Kiri climbed up near the top of the bed and tried to grab it.

He looked to see what Kiri was reaching for. To his horror he recognized it as an old loincloth he had randomly tossed there.

He snatched it before Kiri and threw it off the side of the bed.

“What was that?” Kiri asked again, looking startled.

Corvus sighed with embarrassment, “a loincloth. Ignore it.”

Kiri bursting into giggling, still sniffing from a runny nose.

The Primarch smiled in amusement, “What’s so funny?”

Kiri tried to talk but laughing got in the way. He laughed so hard he flopped onto the bed. Corvus found he couldn’t grinning at the utter joy his son was experiencing.

“What is so funny?” He asked Kiri again.

Kiri snickered and managed to say, “Your dirty underwear!”

He squealed and giggled harder, practically rolling on the bed. The boy’s laughing was intoxicating.

Corvus chuckled, “I’m glad you find this so amusing.”

Kiri giggled some more before flopping down into his father’s arms. He expression became serious.

“This isn’t a trick or a dream is it?” He asked.

He embraced Kiri once more and pressed more kisses to his face and hands.

“It’s not a trick or a dream,” he reassured. “You’re my son now. My baby. I want you and I love you.”

Kiri reach up and pressed his own kiss to the Primarch’s cheek.

“Thank you,” he whispered happily with sniffs. “thank you… I love you, daddy.”

“I love you too. Welcome home, Kiri Corax.”

32 notes · View notes

whyse7vn · 2 years ago

Text

I’M SORRY -

[ ot7 x reader ]

JUNGKOOK -

jk: i’m sorry

jk: didn’t mean to make you upset :(

i hope i die

i should get jumped

barely survive

be on life support until i’m 50

and when i wake up die from the most painful heart attack recorded

i hope no one attends my funeral and i’m publicly and privately made fun of even after i’ve passed

hope my parents are ashamed and i hope that whenever the name jungkook is said people feel sick to their stomachs

i’m gonna throw up

gonna choke myself to death

i have the tightest grip on my throat rn

i’m going red

it’s fading to black

i’m sorry i wasn’t being a good boyfriend

tell bam that his dad was an asshole who didn’t deserve any rights

don’t even let him remember me as his father

i don’t deserve that title

i don’t deserve anything

not after what i did

burn all my clothes

delete all my pictures

tear my face off all posters

cross my name off all paperwork

i am not worthy of anything

y/n: shut up

jk: i’m sorry

y/n: i can tell

jk: i didn’t mean it

y/n: i forgive you

jk: really?

y/n: yeah

jk: do you really or are joking?

if ur joking it’s not a funny joke

y/n: you can come back home now

jk: really 🥺?

y/n: don’t ever use that emoji again

jk: sorry

i’m coming

omw

i love you

this is so great

y/n: you’re so dramatic

jk: i’m sorry

y/n: stop apologising

jk: sorry

i mean

love u

y/n: hurry up

jk: 🏃‍♂️

SEOKJIN -

jin: can you talk to me now

hey

i’m going to kms and it gonna be all your fault if you don’t reply to me

y/n: record it

jin: hey loml 😘😘❤️❤️❤️🤗🤗

WAIT WTF

THATS SO SICK?/?:£:££.&.&.&&.

y/n: what do you want?

jin: i love you ❤️💓🩷

y/n: bye

jin: WAITTTT :(((((((((((((((

pls

y/n: what

jin: i’m outside 🤭🤗❤️

y/n: stay outside

jin: am i a dog?????

DON’T ANSWER THAT

anyways

i’ve come to see you princess 😘❤️‍🔥

y/n: gross

go home

jin: i am home 🥺

y/n: ur at MY home

jin: tu casa es mi casa 😚

y/n: that is not how that phrase goes

jin: let me inside pookie it’s cold 😍

y/n: you should have a key if it’s ur house

jin: LET ME IN IM TRYING SOSOSOSO HARD

FUCK YOU

ITS COLD

MY HAIR IS WET

IM DISTRESSED

LET ME INNNNNNNN

y/n: it took you 3 minutes

to be an asshole again

jin: :((((

i really tried that time

i can’t help it

this is real this is me

i was born this way

you can’t change me

ur the asshole if we think about it why are you trying to change people?? let the world know you LOSER

y/n: fyi you can stay outside

jin: PLS NOOOO PLS PLS PLS PLS PLS PLS

y/n: “pls” doesn’t really sound like sorry to me…

jin: I SAID IM SORRY

I DIDN’T MEAN TO SHOUTT

IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRYYYYYYYYYYY

i love you

this is kinda sadistic if you think about it

didn’t know you was a freak like that bae

it’s okay i kinda like it

how about you let me in now

or do you want me to beg more???

pls oh plsssss let me in 🥺

i’ll never be mean again i promise 😇

pls 😚

hello??

babe??????

fr this isn’t funny

hello

HELLO

OPEN THE DOOR PLS

HELLLOOOO

OMH

HELLLLO

pls

i’m fr sorry

i mean it like genuinely

hello

…

okay let’s stop now

…………..

HELLLLO

fuck you

HOSEOK -

hobi: this fighting stuff kinda boring now

….

hello

i’m sorry

BOOOO

:(((

y/n: you can’t just walk out the house mid argument

hobi: in my defence u were being mean

y/n: so were you???

hobi: ??

y/n: be honest are you fr gonna just leave like that when things get hard?

hobi: i mean i might

y/n: …

hobi: things were pretty hard

y/n: AS MAN OF THE HOUSE YOU SHOULD OF GOT RID OF THE SPIDER

hobi: AS A FEMINIST I LEFT YOU TO TAKE CARE OF IT TO HELP YOU FEEL EMPOWERED

y/n: fuck you don’t come home

hobi: i would never lie to u bae 🙏🏼

and i would never suppress a moment for a woman to feel empowered

y/n: don’t actually fucking speak to me

hobi: ily

cheer up baby cheer up baby

y/n: picked the wrong member

jungkook would of helped me

hobi: omg????????

are you fr?

y/n: would never lie to you bae 🙏🏽

hobi: ….

JIMIN -

jimin:

y/n: ???

jimin: are you still mad at me?

y/n: yes jimin wtf

jimin: do you want to have sex?

y/n: yes jimin wtf

jimin: love you

y/n: whatever

jimin: say it back

y/n: i won’t

jimin: you will

y/n: definitely will not

jimin: i’ll sing for you

y/n: no thanks

jimin: no thanks?

y/n: no thanks.

jimin: you say that like i’m bad at singing

y/n: eh

jimin: eh?

y/n: eh.

jimin: i won’t have sex with you

y/n: aw man

jimin: don’t sound too sad

y/n: ok

jimin: you should be

y/n: i’m not

jimin: i go crazy in bed yk?

y/n: that is the ugliest thing you have ever said to me

jimin: if ur not in love with me just say that

y/n: i won’t

jimin: so ur IN love with me is what i’m hearing

y/n: ur not hearing anything cuz we are messaging rn

jimin: can you just tell me you love me like a normal person?

y/n: you don’t deserve it

jimin: okay maybe that’s true

but you should do it just once

pretty pls with a cherry on top 🥺

y/n: i’ll punch you

jimin: maybe i’ll enjoy it

y/n: nasty

jimin: kiss me

y/n: where are you?

jimin: ur really gonna kiss me?

y/n: ur talking long to tell me where you are so ig i’m not

jimin: joon’s studio

y/n: maybe i’m omw

jimin: ur so in love with me it’s kinda gross 🤭

YOONGI -

yoongi: :3

y/n: die tbh

yoongi: :3

y/n: your stupid faces mean nothing to me

yoongi: :3

y/n: …

yoongi: :33333

y/n: i hate you

yoongi: :Ɛ

y/n: ew wtf how did you do that

yoongi: Ɛ:

y/n: stop omg

yoongi: i’m sorry :3

y/n: cool

yoongi: i’m fr :3

y/n: idc :3

yoongi: you used the face :3

ur not mad :3

y/n: ur logic is wrong

yoongi: bring the face back :3

and it’s not logic it’s common sense :3

y/n: ur wrong

yoongi: never been wrong a day in my life :3

y/n: that’s crazy

so when you shouted at me for no reason you weren’t in the wrong?

good to know

yoongi: okay i never said that :3

y/n: but you did

yoongi: ur being annoying :3

y/n: fuck you

DID YOU JUST SEND ME 10K?????????

yoongi: did i? :3

y/n: you can’t just buy my forgiveness

yoongi: i can’t? :3

y/n: this is not how relationships work yoongi

yoongi: this is how our relationship works :3

y/n: no it’s not

STOP SENDING ME MONEY OMG?:£:£:’

yoongi: :3

y/n: you are still not forgiven leave me alone

yoongi: unforgiven i’m a villain :3

y/n: SEND ANOTHER 10k AND UR GETTING BLOCKED

yoongi: ur making me real upset rn :3

y/n: go back to work

yoongi: stop being mad at me :3

y/n: die

yoongi: don’t say that i’m about to get on a plane :3

y/n: now i feel bad

yoongi: say sorry :3

y/n: nvm

yoongi: :(

look you’ve made me change faces hope you feel bad :(

y/n: i don’t

yoongi: ur sick and twisted :(

y/n: cry about it

yoongi: really hope i survive this plane ride :(

y/n: i will not be guilt tripped by you

yoongi: you told me to die knowing i was getting on a plane :(

y/n: bye

yoongi: what if i had a deep deep fear of flying and u made that fear 10x worse rn :(

y/n: you don’t

yoongi: you don’t know a thing :(

y/n: fuck you

yoongi: do you really want ur last words to me be fuck you :(

y/n: fly safe

TAEHYUNG -

y/n: no

tae: hiiiiiiii

wtf how did you know

y/n: blocked

tae: NONONONONONO

y/n: you have one minute

tae: i am walking alone rn

y/n: ???

tae: on the street

y/n: ok?

tae: alone

y/n: you said that

tae: ALONE

ALL ALONE

y/n: right

tae: it’s not right actually

ITS VERY FAR FROM RIGHT

i’m ALONE

do you know what could happen to me rn?

i could literally be snatched up off the street by anyone

y/n: hopefully it’s a rehabilitation centre 🙏🏽

tae: WHAG IS UR PROBLEM

IM ALONE ALONE ALONE ALONE

KIM TAEHYUNG ALONE ON THE STREET

WHAT ARE YOU NOT GETTING HERE?

y/n: ur one minute is up

tae: no it’s not

can you pls care for me rn i’m stressed out

y/n: it was pretty stressful when you stood me up yesterday

but i powered through 💪🏽

i’m sure you can do the same!!!

tae: that never happened

pls let’s pretend that never happened

i’m the perfect boyfriend i swear

y/n: get lost

like actually

never come back

tae: 😢

you don’t even mean that

y/n: are you sure?

tae: IM SORRY PLS PLSPLSSSSSS

forgive me

y/n: no

tae: you can have my card

y/n: don’t want it

tae: take my house

i’ll give you my keys rn

y/n: i have ur keys

tae: you do?

you thief omg

give them back

y/n: you left them here???

after YOU stormed out my house after you made ME upset

tae: oh yeah

i’m coming back now

y/n: asshole

tae: let’s put this behind us and move on

that’s a great idea i say

y/n: you are single

tae: don’t say that

y/n: said it

tae: we are actually engaged and expecting our 10th child

y/n: you are single

tae: top 10 singles

made a few of those in my time

LOL

i’m funny right

say i’m funny

y/n: it’s painful talking to you

tae: painfully in love with me are you?

y/n: it’s like i’m taking to a brick wall

you have like selective hearing

tae: what i’m hearing is you want to kiss me on the lips?

y/n: call an ambulance

tae: feeling so much love for me ur throwing up?

???

hello

maybe i do deserve this

NAMJOON -

y/n: would you now like to explain why the hell you sent halsey flowers on MY birthday??

namjoon: it wasn’t just on ur birthday i’ve been sending them all week for like a month now

y/n: namjoon what the fuck??

namjoon: i’m confused

y/n: UR confused????

do you like her or something?

namjoon: ofc i like her!

y/n: so ur cheating?

namjoon: what

y/n: ur cheating on me and you have no shame???

what the actual fuck is wrong with you??

namjoon: i’m not cheating?

y/n: for a month now you’ve been sending another girl that you like flowers

EVERY WEEK???

namjoon: every friday

y/n: fuck you

namjoon: i’m confused how that’s cheating when you told me to do that?

y/n: WHEN HAVE I EVER SAID “OH NAMJOON SEND OTHER BITCHES FLOWERS”

namjoon: you literally said you loved how halsey’s bf gave her flowers every week and that you wished i did that?

y/n: ….

there is no way

….

namjoon

oh my god

kim fucking namjoon

LMAOOSO ARE YOU FR?

namjoon: what??? i’m so confused pls tell me what i did wrong

i would never cheat on you

ur freaking me out

y/n: think about it

why would i wish you sent halsey flowers?

think

like really think

namjoon: IDK i was confused as hell but you seemed like you really wanted me to

so i did

y/n: i meant i wanted you to buy ME flowers you idiot omg

namjoon: oh

that makes a lot more sense

y/n: yeah

you are the dumbest smart man i’ve ever met

namjoon: my fault

i get confused sometimes 😞

y/n: i love you

namjoon: i love you too

ur not mad anymore?

y/n: could never be mad at you silly

346 notes · View notes

poetsblvd · 1 year ago

Text

series masterlist 𖤓 folklore.

a collection of fics based off of the album folklore!

happy reading ᰔ

౨ৎ LOST IN THE MEMORY CL16 !

the sweetness of august had filled him with joy, the wine stained kisses you’d left him with creep into his daydreams leaving him starstruck, perhaps he was cruel to give you pain when all you gave him was happiness.

౨ৎ IF MY WISHES CAME TRUE MV01 !

he smiles when he talks about it now, his greatest love, his favourite love, he thinks, no, he knows the greatest loves of all time are over now, because you were the greatest one.

౨ৎ HEARTBEAT ON THE HIGH LINE CS55 !

he holds you close to him as he cries, memories of kisses in his car and drunkenly dancing under streetlights flashing through him, he begs for forgiveness, desperately trying to change the ending to what he believes is his forever.

౨ৎ BALANCING ON BREAKING BRANCHES MV01 !

five months later and he sees you standing with anothers arms around your body, he’d never learned to read your mind, but he knows the joke isn’t funny, and he knows he’d still get his knuckles bloody for you.

౨ৎ DWINDLING MERCURIAL HIGH CS55 !

nothing pulled from secrets was ever good, you knew that, but he was everything, he kissed you till you were dizzy, pushing himself so deep into your brain, your heart, and your mind, erasing the fact that he wasn’t truly yours from both your heads.

౨ৎ BROKEN COBBLESTONES LN4 !

he remembers when it all went wrong, the stuffy gala and you dancing, glowing under everyone’s eyes beautifully, he should have stayed and pulled you to him, he should have smiled hard at you. he shouldn’t have ever gotten into that car with her, he shouldn’t have ever continued doing the same for the rest of the summer.

౨ৎ THREAD OF GOLD PG10 !

it was rather clichéd now that he thought about it, believing he’d meet his somebody at his favourite childhood park, but he smiles when he shows you around the park, unbeknownst to the invisible string that had tethered the two of you to the same park years ago.

౨ৎ TALLEST TIPTOES CS55 !

he spins you around and watches you shimmer in the dark, enrapturing everyone, he hopes you know how much you mean to him, he hopes you know he’s trying everything to keep you looking at him like you always do, and you hope he knows you shine just for him

౨ৎ FLASHBACK IN A FILM REEL CL16 !

he doesn’t quite know what to say, but he’s here on your doorway, all his regrets caging him in from the inside, following his fears, and bleeding into an open wound, that only you can heal.

love note ᰔ hii, im super excited for this series and can’t wait to get started with this! folklore is my favourite album for sure and i love the angst that’s gonna come from this!! please excuse the shitty summaries, i tried to be poetic and i think i achieved it on some level but meh? it’s once again exam season so i will take my time with this, but i hope you enjoy!! xoxo

COMING SOON !

#౨ৎ my works #f1 x reader #charles leclerc x reader #max verstappen x reader #carlos sainz x reader #lando norris x reader #pierre gasly x reader #f1 x y/n

112 notes · View notes

kenlvry · 2 years ago

Note

you're the only sp writer i request from you're literally my fav 😢😢 but can i request stan kyle and kenny with a reader who gets jealous really easily??

reader who is easily jealous

an, HI OMG THIS IS SO SWEET ILY ANON ☹️☹️🫶🫶 18-19

kyle

okay kyle didn't know you were the type to get easily jealous, i mean he js thought you didn't really care and kinda let him roll with whoever he wants but thats probably because he hangs out with girls who are in the same cliques as you so,,

it was until you literally glared at the waitress who stared at him for one too many seconds he knew, you ended up having a bad mood throughout the whole meal and eyeing the waitress "baby r you okay?" "why? if im not are you going to leave me for that stupid waitress?" "WHAT NO???"

theres always two reasons why you're so quiet on a date, kyle was too friendly with a girl or a girl was too friendly with him. you ignore him roll your eyes at him and he's just begging you to give him an ounce of attention.

if a girl likes his story you literally stalk her, her mom, her brother, her father, her boss, her colleagues everything.

you continue to ignore that girl for weeks and roll your eyes at her whenever you see her around cz why u liking my mans story? keep your likes baby

he finds it so hot tbh like omg ur this obsessive with me?? 🤭 he gets turned on by this for sure.

even though he finds it attractive and it gets him all sweaty he needs to he careful because you weren't easy to persuade once your jealous fr. once he had to get down on his knees, crying out to you to please look at him. he loves you though and he'd do it again

a thud was heard from your window, then another, and another. it was annoying you so you open your curtains to see what was causing the noise, it was your boyfriend. you opened up your window sticking out half of your body out of the window, "kyle?" you yell, "please unblock me, i dont know why she follows and likes all my post i swear" he yells back. you smile to yourself at how desperate this man is "what if i dont want to?" you put your hands in the frame of the window smiling "um,, I haven't really thought about it" "oh bye then" "wait wait!" he called out and you turn back from walking away. "I'll uh.. I'll freeze myself!" your eyes upon widen at his dumb idea "what no you idiot" he takes off his jacket, gloves and hands then put it on the ground, he then kneels clasp his hands together "please?" "omg." you rub your temples together and rush down. kyle sighs thinking you left him, looking at the ground of shame because now the neighbors think he got another girl pregnant or something. the front door open and he flung his head to its direction, you walked out with your own coat wrapping it around him "you can beg all you want but there's a way to do it without hurting yourself" "anything to make you happy" "I'm not" he chuckles as you drag him inside "don't do that again" "hmm we'll see" "kyle brofloski!" he chuckles again at you while you bring him up to your room, he really loves you.

kenny

LOVES IT SO FUCKING MYCH 😝😝😝

its like he knows you love him because you'll isolate yourself just because a girl winked at him and won't see him until he begs for forgiveness even though it aint his fault

okay that kinda sounds like a redflag,, WTV WALK HIM LIKE A DOG IG 🤭

anyways, he doesn't hate it dont care if it interferes his life. even if he has to give up everything to make you talk to him he'll do it IM NOT JOKING

he does not care, he has to block all the girls he knows? okay! never talk to any of his girl friends? yea sure! breath only your air and not lay his eyes on a single woman except you only? anything you want babe ☺️

ALSO GETS HARD FOR THIS PLEASE. i js know he's turned on after you get visually jealous.

"please baby look at me" he pulls your arm for you to stop your tracks from going into your room "shut up, maybe you should go to that hoe who waved at you, why did she wink?? did you two used to have something??" you pull back your arm and go up the stairs with kenny following in suit. arriving infront of your bedroom kenny pulled your arm again and when you turned he immediately fall to his knees "please, i dont know her" he hold your palm with both hands, glossy eyed "i,, kenny" "please?" tilting his head to the side, he'll sit there for hours if he has to. "get up mccormick, im sorry i overreacted" he got up so quickly then hugged you, his head falling on your shoulder "loveyou" his breath on your shoulder, you smile "love you too"

stan

i think he has a love hate relationship with your jealousy, like on one hand he knows you love him and would literally kill anyone for him but on the other... its kinda tiring to beg to you

i mean he doesn't care going on his knees, and crawling all fours for you but at times he just can't deal with it yk??

but he mostly loves it obvi, the way your eyes stay focus on the girl that was 'hitting' on him or the way you sulk and won't tell him why even though its obvious it's bc your jealous, its all so cute to him. and he loves this side of your jealousy, just couples being couple

other times though.. you'd block gim everywhere and won't unblock him until the next day when you reflect on your stupid decisions. or when you ignore him at school or not even make eyecontact with him, he hates and loves it.

you had another quarrel with stan again, this fight was because he still comments '☺️' under Wendy's post of herself, it was valid true but you still thought you overreacted. sitting on your bed with your arms cross and tears almost falling down at the thought of Stan going back to wendy broke your heart. ding a notification popped up and you pick up your phone hoping it was stan despite you blocking him everywhere, it was your friend "um, whats up with stan?" she texted you "wdym" your eyebrows furrow together, you immediately unblock him on Instagram and to your surprise his profile picture was you, his stories had 8 pictures of you with cute songs behind it. he had posted 2 picture of you two on his feed one captioning "traveling the moon and back to find good internet to see if her blocking me was a mistake or im a mistake". his bio was now "tell her to unblock me ☹️". you smile at this and your cheeks turned a pink tint. you unblocked him on every platform and it seems he had changed his profile picture to you on every single one. "." "BABE YOU UNBLOCKED ME" "i mean yeah i have to especially since i have 5 people texting me about your profile" "just wanted to show my girlfriend love" "whatever" a knock was heard on your door, then a chat from stan "open up i brought food and wine" you smile and blush to yourself as your rush down to open the door. he was the sweetest

#south park #south park x y/n #south park x you #kenny mccormick #kenny mccormick x reader #south park x reader #kyle broflovski x reader #kyle broflovski #stan marsh x reader #stan marsh

397 notes · View notes

retarded-faggot · 2 months ago

Text

back (please read the whole thing im begging you)

uh, hi

yeah, i still exist lmao

so, i decided to actually open tumblr after about 2 years i believe

and, oh damn. none of the links in the theme i have on my blog are functional, and what the fuck was up with all the lavender i used back then? god, such a child, right?

yeah, well, if someone still tried to navigate there, im so sorry, i just hopped outta the fandom for a couple years. and social media. and life.

not to say i have it together even now, but ive decided to be a little more liberal with myself and indulge myself with this shit.

yeah, so, not sure how many people are reading this, but all the stuff i had in the previously pinned "welcome" message? fuck it.

here's a new intro :

hey, im shades <#3

i was previously :

(oh wow. did the bulletins exist before because idfr and i cant find them)

la-fille-noire-13: okay, cringe asf, but hear me out. I was like, a dumb tween, okay? i was so fucking obsessed with miraculous that i decided to learn french on duolingo and shit. which is why my username was in french. honestly what's worse is that i had just started learning it, and tbf google translate sucks so i have no idea what i typed in, but i wanted it to be "the girl in black" and it came out to be "the black girl" which I didn't realise until a year into it. tbf louis-oui-baguette would have been better. please forgive me for that atrocity.

chaotic-fiwwe: set by a slightly more mature, slightly more recent me. it isnt really good, but it is what it is folks. this feature on the miraculous fanworks server allowed us to "owofy" words if i recall correctly. so i was "fiwwe" for a long time on that server. i decided to finally come out of my cringe asf early teenage phase after like, 2 years and change my username. but im nostalgic asf so the "fiwwe" stayed.

shades: well. here we are. this will likely get similar thoughts in the very near future (im already contemplating hating this because why not) but this was completely randomized and safe.

oh yes, im still a minor, so stop flashing me, please. i mean, i know im hot, but im just not interested thanks. go post this shit on onlyfans or stuff.

but yes nsfw jokes i shall make because well. why not. (for those of you who read this and think, god, she's a minor, why the fuck should she know this? uhm, i believe we've all been through the lockdown, right? and we all know that what came out of the lockdown is not exactly an innocent generation, right?)

also yes,i may be young but im not gen alpha tyvm, so i shall hate on gen alpha brainrot because i can (no genuine hate meant loves)

right, and, my vocabulary isnt as proficient as it was before so fuck grammar (but my perfectionist ass will try to make it almost 100% grammatically correct in terms of words. not punctuation, words. i write in my voice. )

ive been in the mlb fandom since 2019, i think. i love it and i hate it because

the plot is good but the amount of cringe in seasons 1-2 is not

i got back in touch with the series and fandom like a week ago, but unfortunately i couldn't find anyone to really match my freak (wrt mlb) anymore

which is why im back here <3

ive read kotlc, percy jackson, 39 clues, a few books of agatha christie, and..

idfr lmao i dont even remember what i read in these books either. i have the memory of a goldfish

and yes a huge huge huge sabrina carpenter, taylor swift, eminem, billie eilish fan <3

im honestly kinda fucked up but not messed up if ugwim. my jokes aren't always the best, my posts wont always be people pleasing anymore, and majorly, there will be no more "mlb update posts" anymore.

i will curse 90% of the time so if its an issue please leave <3

i will post when i want to, what i want to, how i want to. but ill tag them properly so nw

im not at all academically dumb so i may post stuff roasting you dumbasses (but i dont mean it, we've all struggled <3)

feel free to tell me if i havent tagged shit properly but you cant tell me what not to post unless its like, completely inappropriate and violates tumblr terms.

lmao im delusional asf to think anyone would actually be bothered to read this much but this is me indulging myself so

see yall suckers <3

#its me #hi #shades #incorrectly tagging because PLEASE I NEED SOMEBODY TO #you know #match my freak #miraculous ladybug #please read the whole thing im begging you #i promise you youll love me #no you wont but #delusion is bliss <3 #london special #no this is not about that but i am going to post my thoughts on that thanks #<3333333333333333333

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loserforeddie · 2 years ago

Text

IM SORRY SHOT IN THE DARK PART TWO IS TAKING SO LONG, BUT HERES A LITTLE SNEAK PEAK

Tw: angst, swearing, EDDIE FEELS HURT :(((

. . .

“Are you just planning to stand outside my house all day, Munson? Waiting to yell at me again?”

He winced at the anger in your voice, although it was well deserved, it still made him feel like shit.

“N-no! I…I came here to…say I’m sorry…”

You stayed silent, watching his face as he sighed slowly.

“I said some really… shitty things. None of which I meant, I really shouldn't have said all that. You didn't deserve it, really, you're sweet and kind, and considerate of other people. You've always been nice to me, and I mean, people aren't nice to me. I shouldn’t have said that to you, I just thought… I thought it was all a joke, seeing your friends, and seeing them laugh at me. It's just… I never thought that someone like you could actually like me… because… because I really like you. and I know I fucked up my chances, and I know I ruined everything. and I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry I'm a fucked up dick, you don't deserve that. I just… I just hope you're okay. don't let a dick like me are you down, Y/N. I was just a stupid jerk, and I'm really sorry. I don’t-I don’t want you to forgive me, because I understand why you’d be so upset, you have every right to be. I just wanna do something, to make up for it, y’know? Anything, Y/N, I just want you to know I’m sorry.”

He fidgeted nervously with his rings, feeling his stomach twist up in nerves.

You stared at him, your eyes sharp and poised.

“Do you mean it?” Your voice was shaky.

“About being sorry? Of course, Y/N, I’m so sor-”

But you cut him off, “No…no about-about liking me.”

He sucked in a heavy breath, bitting down on his lip before responding. “Y-yeah….yeah I really like you, Y/N.”

You stayed silent for a minute.

“I’m sorry Eddie…I don’t-I don’t know what to think. I…I really like you, a lot. But what you said, it really hurt-”

Eddie interrupted you, “I know! I…I know,” he stared into your eyes, gulping down the lump in his throat.

“I know. And I’ll do anything, anything to show how sorry I am. Really, Y/N, please tell me what I can do.”

You bit your lip, “I…I don’t know. Eddie, I think… you should probably leave.”

At your words, Eddie could have sworn his heart broke, his stomach dropped at your words. He could even feel tears well up in his eyes, but he blinked them away.

He wanted to badly to get on his knees, beg you to let him do something, anything, to make it up you. The thought that he made you feel this way, made him feel so shitty he was going partly insane.

But, he wanted to give you what you asked.

“Yeah…yeah I understand…just- if you need me, I’ll be here.”

You nodded, and he could see a small tear drip down your cheek.

“Goodbye, Eddie.”

. . .

ITS COMING SOON I PROMISE

#eddie munson #eddie my love #eddie stranger things #stranger things #eddie x reader #eddie munson stranger things #eddie munson x you #eddie x y/n #eddie x you #eddie m #eddie munson x reader #stranger things x you #eddie blog #eddie x me #joesph quinn #joe quinn #stranger things season four

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glassartpeasants · 3 years ago

Note

If you don't make a happy ending for couldn't care less you better keep bob with you at all times

HOW DARE YOU THREATEN BOB YOU KNOW WHAT-

Couldn’t Care Less .2

Shigaraki x GN!Reader

Warnings: Angst, death, blood, abuse, gore

~~~

“i hope that blue haired fuck got what he wanted. I hope that handyman freak dies alone.” You say to yourself as you walk down the alleys way of Musutafu. The smell of the dingey and moldy alleyways flood your nose as the laughter of happy couples ring in your ears.

How come they got they’re happily ever after but you didn’t? It wasn’t fair. You did everything you could to be there for him. Yet he still treats you like shit, all because you cared about him? And then he thinks your cheating all cause you ask a male friend for advice! What an insecure asshole.

A vibrating in your pocket brought you back to reality as you realize your phone was ringing. Letting out a sigh you answer,

“Hello?”

“Come pick up your shit.” Oh, you thought you blocked this fuck.

“Keep it asshole. I don’t want anything that smells like ‘lonely bastard who only gets action from his hand’ on my clothes. Burn it, decay it, I couldn’t give a shit less.”

“God you were always so dramatic. And there’s no reason to be a cunt.”

“And there was no reason for you to be an insecure dick. You either block my number or im calling the police and ratting on you.” A silence fell over the phone. Nothing was said until you finally spoke up.

“Jeez your pathetic. I’ll do it myself.” He was about to say something, insult your most likely before you hung up the phone and blocked him not seconds later.

“Now he’s outta my hair. I can finally feel some sort of calm.”

~~~

3 weeks later

After a day of coming back to your musty apartment you decided it needed a little bit of cleaning, considering you haven’t been their in about 4 months. You paid up front all the time even when you weren’t living in it. Just in case ya know?

You swept up the floors, vacuumed the carpet AND shampooed it.Cleaned the tub, shower and sinks, cleaned out your empty refrigerator, washed all you sheets and what clothes you left there. It wasn’t much so you knew you had to get some more before anything else. That and groceries.

After all that was said and done, you sat down on the couch and just relaxed. Well you tired, that was before Shigaraki popped into your head again. It wasn’t a sort of loving way, it was a hatred sort of. The thought of his stupid face made you just want to punch a wall, pretending to be his face.

But you ignored it as you turned on the Tv, hoping that would get your mind off him. Nothing interesting except the news. Always talking about violence and war. Same old thing over and over. Blood, death, tragedy.

“This world is a cruel unjust place. The only way it seems to be recognized in this world is death or doing horrible things. Nothing good every comes to fruition.” You grumble before walking to your room and plopping down on the nice clean and still warm sheets. The nice smell of lavender slowly dragging you to sleep.

~~~

A loud bang hit your door which ripped you from your slumber. You were questioning on checking it out before you heard something that made your heart stop,

“If there’s anyone in the house kill them, we can’t have people knowing we ransacked this place.” You slowly get off your bed before moving slowly and quietly to your window. Your push your fingers on the glass and you gently push it up. Grabbing at the sides of the window you pull yourself out of it, not before hearing a gunshot and a burning pain inside your calf.

“Fuck! They’re getting away!” You could hear them from inside the house.

“Did they see you?!” You fell from your window onto the ground. Thankfully your apartment was on the first floor so it wasn’t a high drop.

“Not that i know of! I did shot them in the leg so they shouldn’t have gotten far!” You try your hardest as you run towards the main street. Cutting through alleyways, going as fast as you can as you hear they’re footsteps behind you. Looking up closely you see a hero, knowing he was your only chance you scream for help.

“Help me please!” The hero’s head turned towards you and ran towards you. You guess the robbers heard your cry for help because they’re footsteps seemed to be heading back your probably trashed apartment.

“Oh my! What happened?!” The sound of the hero’s concerned voice calmed you down a bit.

“Some people tried to rob my place and i tried to get out of there silently but they must have came into my room and saw me leaving and shot me in the calf!” You wince as putting pressure on the wound burned hotter than hell.

“Don’t worry! I’ll get you to the hospital in no time!” You felt relieved before hearing a crunching sound, you looked to your left and see a familiar patch of blue hair in your peripheral vision. You ignored him before getting picked up by the hero and was carried to the hospital. The blood loss from your calf slowly dragged you into unconsciousness.

~~~

After waking up you notice the white room you were in. It was pristine to the touch and smelled of lemon cleaning products. The bright lights hallways peered inside your room from the crack of your door.

Looking around the small feeling of pain crept back into your leg except not as painful anymore. Pulling back the covers you notice bandages and a small bit of blood that stained through the bandages around your wound.

“Ah fuck that’s gonna scar. It’s gonna be a pain to heal too.” You say to yourself as you pull back the blankets and wrap yourself up in them.

Right as you were falling back asleep the ringing of your cellphone brought you out. Grumbling in annoyance you grab it and look at the caller id. It was a number you didn’t recognize so you just let it ring thinking it’ll be the end of it. That was until it started ringing again. You sighed in frustration and picked up the phone, not wanting it to ring longer since it was in the dead of night at the hospital and you wanted people to be able to sleep.

“What the hell do you want? It’s the middle of the night.” You annoyed voice rang into the other side of the phone.

“Why tf were you talking to a hero? Did you fucking break your end of the bargain?” You were confused at first. You definitely knew the voice behind the phone. Then you remembered earlier that day when you saw him in the shadows.

“I was literally shot. You think im not gonna ask someone for help?” You rub the bridge of your nose.

“I don’t believe you. You always were a two faced bitch.”

“Oh jesus fuck, thanks for the insult. Glad to know what you always thought about me.”

“I’m going to kill you you backstabbing bitch.”

“Love ya too. goodnight and goodbye Shigaraki.” You hung up and blocked said number. You weren’t going to lie, hearing him spill such an insult and threat hurt you and made you very weary and afraid if he would actually go through with it or if he was just saying that to scare you.

You knew what those hands could do and you knew how painful that death would have been. You were hurt more than you liked to admit, at the beginning of your relationship he wasn’t aggressive or mean at all towards you. He’d try to get you flowers or your favorite type of drink. He called you pet names that would make your heart flutter and beat, you don’t know what you did wrong for him to change so suddenly. It was like on day he flipped a switch, and you never knew why.

You tried recalling the day where it started and remembered that everyone was annoyed or being rude to Dabi, you didn’t know why and when you asked Spinner or anyone else they just said it was national, be a bitch to Dabi day. You laughed and shrugged it off ignoring it before walking up to your boyfriend giving him a kiss on the lips, only to be pushed into the wall and ignored. You just looked at him in shocked and it had only spiraled down from there to where you are now.

Something had to be wrong. You knew it, Dabi had to have something to do with Shigaraki’s switch in behavior. You looked around the room for any camera and when you noticed that there were none, you called up the burnt male himself. He surprisingly picked up on the first ring.

“(Y/N)? I haven’t heard from you in 3 weeks. Or was it four? Doesn’t matter, where have you been?”

“Dabi, i need you to be honest with me, did you say something to Shigaraki?”

“Huh?”

“Dabi, five months ago Shigaraki flipped a switch and went from a caring boyfriend to an actually nightmare. I need to know if you or anyone else said something to him.” Dabi was quiet on the other line before sighing,

“About that time range i made a joke about sleeping with you, everyone knew it was a joke but apparently Shigaraki didn’t. I didn’t think he’d treat you like he did. Im sorry.” You fell silent. All this shit treatment because Shigaraki couldn’t a joke. Sure it pissed you off that Dabi made such a stupid joke but you were more mad at Shigaraki that he just treated you like shit instead of asking you and confronting you about it.

“Thank you for telling me. Do you know where Shigaraki is now?”

“He left about an hour ago, why?” Shit. You knew this was the only hospital close to your place and Shigaraki knew that too. You got up from your bed and locked the door before going back into your bed, watching the crack under your door incase the light was blocked.

“Dabi, I just want you to know that i forgive you.”

“What? What the fuck are you talking about-” Your phone went silent as the battery died.

‘Shit shit shit shit!’ you thought to yourself as you beg for the phone to turn back on. But you fell silent as the light from the outside of your room was blocked.

“(Y/N), I know you're in there, open the fucking door before i decay it down.” You said nothing in fear. You were glued to your bed as you faced the door.

But that fear was nothing compared to seeing him actually decay the door.

“You stupid snitch. i should make your death as painful as possible.” he said as soon as he stepped inside your hospital room.

“Shigaraki, I didn’t snitch I promise. Why don’t you believe me!” You say as you get off your bed and try to get as far away from him as possible. The pain of the bullet would making you wince.

“Why would I believe a cheating bitch like you?” Before you could speak a four fingered grip wrapped itself around your throat. Shigaraki was always fast, you should have known that you were gonna die even if you tried your hardest.

“I didn’t cheat on you!” You try to pry yourself from shigaraki’s grip.

“Dabi says otherwise.”

“Are you really going to believe him?! You didn’t even talk to me or ask me about it! Just went straight to believing him!” The grip on your neck got tighter.

“then why was they’re a hickey on your collarbone?!”

“You gave it to me! It was fading out!”

“That doesn’t change the fact you snitched!” His pinkie was grazing closer to your skin.

“I never snitched, I was robbed and then they shot me. If you went to my apartment you would see i was right.” He said nothing just staring at you with cold dead eyes.

“Look! I have bandages wrapped around my calf!” Shigaraki looked down before saying something back.

“It was something the hero’s did so they could protect you in this shit hospital.” I was at that moment you knew, nothing you said would change his mind. You shed not a tear while looking him in the eyes

“I wish I never met you. Fuck you Tomura Shigaraki, I hope you die alone and I’ll see you in hell.” You move your head so his last and final finger touched your skin.

The pain of your skin decaying and falling off was much more painful than you thought it would be. You can remember screaming in pain but, it felt more of a emotional scream rather than one of physical pain. but it seems you weren’t the only one screaming.

The sounds of Shigaraki wailing and screaming your name reached your ears before all you heard was silence and saw nothing.

Shigaraki scrambled to try and grab you and even put you together, but your bloody ashes stuck to his hand. Remains of your existence covered his clothes as he screamed in pain.

“No no no no! Wait please! I didn’t mean it!” He cried as his tears fell onto your ashes, the tears collecting the ashes and forming a grey tear drop. He wasn’t thinking clearly, he’s sorry! He didn’t want to kill you!

Bile rose from his throat as he puked all over the ground, inches away from your ashes. He grabbed your ashes trying to pick them up to hold what was left of you. But all he got was the remains of your smeared all over his hoodie. He shook violently as memories of you guys replayed in his mind, your happy face and the way you use to love him and care for him.

But now, you were nothing more than ashes on his sleeve, reminding him that he was now truly alone.

#tomura shigaraki #mha #bnha #tomura shigaraki x reader #tomura shiragaki #mha tomura #Shigaraki #shigaraki tomura #mha shigaraki #shigaraki x reader #never threaten bob again anon :)

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goldengoddess · 4 years ago

Note

soooo the idea is a fic set during king of scars where the reader is nikolai's childhood best first and we stumble into his room one evening and we actually see him change into the demon and just absjajnsns

i am yours - nikolai lantsov

* KING OF SCARS & RULE OF WOLVES SPOILERS *

pairing: nikolai lantsov x reader

a/n: okay this is absolutely garbage rae i am so sorry pls forgive me,,, i KNOW this is not how nikolai’s demon works and he wouldn’t just like turn back but for the sake of this fic pls pretend <33333

for the lovley @wtfrae !!! i love u pls go read her work everyone <3

warnings: spoilers! some angst n like threat of violence but y’all know me, everything is good and happy by the end

nikolai had always been the one person you could turn to. since the two of you were kids, it had always been an unbreakable bond. something no one else seemed to understand. how to kids, tossed aside by their family, tested in every way possible, were able to find each other and bring out the best in one another. nikolai made you better, made you good.

life in ravka was never easy, it was a constant struggle. especially in the years leading up to nikolai’s reign. the two of you almost hadn’t made it out alive then, and while nikolai had been out fighting with alina in the fold, you had stayed at the spinning wheel helping the injured.

but when things finally settled down, alina and mal safe and away, nikolai had told you so many stories. the two of you had spent months apart. so out of nostalgia, every night you’d sneak into nikolai’s room and listen to your best friend tell you stories about everything. all the battles he’d fought along as sturmhond, what the battle against the darkling had looked like.

and even when nikolai ran out of stories, and you ran out of questions, you kept sneaking into his room to talk to him. he was the king of ravka, during the day he never even stopped to take a breath. but his nights were reserved for you. just so he could hear the sound of your voice before he was bound to his bed by chains.

nikolai loved you dearly, you were the only constant he had ever known. but he couldn’t bring himself to share what had happened to him during the battle with the darkling, what he’d become. instead, he told you the stories he told everyone else, how he was captured and tortured. it hurt him, to lie to you. but he couldn’t have you seeing him the way he saw himself, a monster. so even though lying to you pained him every night, he would do it to hear your excited questions and giggles as you snuck out of his room.

he always made sure you were gone before zoya came in. he wouldn’t be able to explain the drugging potion. or even worse, his horrible transformation into the demon that lived inside of him.

but secrets almost never stay secrets.

“saints nikolai,” you gasped, rushing off his bed to grab grab your coat, “it’s past midnight. i can’t be in here!”

nikolai sat up and looked out his window, you watched the color drain from his face. he cleared his throat and walked over to you, “you’re right you should probably go.”

you nodded and shuffled away from him, but before opening the door you paused. you turned back to the blonde haired boy, “nikolai?”

“yes sweetheart?” he answered, facing you.

“i could,” you hesitated, “i could sleep over. one night, i’m not saying tonight. just some night. i’ll sleep on the floor but, i spend all of my night here anyways. just like when we were kids.”

as nikolai slowly walked closer to you, you waited for his teasing remark and eventual acceptance. the two of you w had a sleepover since before he left ravka. of course it wouldn’t be the same, as he was now king, but he was your nikolai.

instead, he gently tucked a piece of your hair and kissed your forehead. “i don’t think that’s such a good idea sweetheart.”

your heart shattered at his words and his at the fact that he had to say them. there was nothing he wanted more. nothing that would bring him more peace than holding you in his arms until the sunrise. not just for a couple of hours right before bed, not having to pretend that everything he felt for you was strictly platonic.

“oh” you said defeatedly. “that, yeah that’s okay. i’ll see you tomorrow nikolai.” and with that you rushed out of the room.

later, as zoya gave nikolai genya and david’s potion to knock him out, all he could think about was the horrible look on your face.

at some point in the night you’d made the decision to go talk to nikolai. the two of you couldn’t go on like this, attempting to be way you have been before the darkling and alina while tip toeing around these new feelings you had for eachother.

but as you made your way to nikolai’s doors, hand on the doorknob, you heard a soft growl coming from inside. you covered your mouth with your hand to prevent a gasp from escaping your lips. you slowly turned the handle and stepped into the room.

on nikolai’s kingly bed was a dark giant looking demon. it’s wings were the color of the night sky seen in the window of the bed room. it took your breath away.

you pressed your back against the wall, trying to move back towards the door without making any noise. but the demon heard you and snapped it’s head in your direction.

every part of your body was screaming to run, to scream even. but something stopped you. the eyes. they stopped you. they were dark and pitch black but there was something familiar about them. not the color but the way they watched you. like they were trying to remember every single part of you just in case.

nikolai was the only person who you knew looked at you that way.

“nikolai?” you whispered to the monster.

the creature craned its neck to the side, similar to the confused head tilts that nikolai used to give you during lessons. you took a hesitant step forward, holding your hands up to show that you weren’t going to cause harm.

“nikolai” you tried again, with more conviction in your voice.

the creature let out a small growl as a response and you flinched away. at your movement it out a whine and moved away from you.

you shuffled closer, “hey no no i’m okay. nikolai?”

slowly, as you repeated your best friends name over and over, the creature became less beast and more man. slowly morphing into a messy set of blonde curls and body you’d hugged more times than you can recall. your nikolai.

he curled up in a ball and leaned his back against the end of his bed.

“nikolai” you attempted softly, falling to your knees in front of him.

he scrambled away to a corner of the room, “please. please leave. i’m begging.” his voice was raspy from misuse, thought the two of you had spoken only hours before.

“nikolai i’m not leaving, please explain to me. what was that?” you pleaded with him.

“that was nothing, now go. please please” he sobbed into his hands.

you crossed your arms over your chest in a stubborn gesture that he couldn’t even see, “you’re lying to me again! i’m not leaving until you explain what that was. why can’t you tell me the truth for once?”

“that was me!” he yelled as he lifted his head and met your eyes for the first time.

you let out a sigh of relief at the familiar hazel color of his eyes. you crossed your legs together, “that was you?”

“yes that was me. that is what the darkling did to me. now please,” he let out an exhausted sob “please leave sweetheart.”

you felt tears swelling in your own eyes at his voice. how broken he sounded. your nikolai never sounded so defeated. and if he ever felt that way, he had never shown you. you crawled over to him slowly and placed your hands on the sides of his face, rubbing away the tears.

“what are you doing” he whimpered and dropped his head into your hands, “i could hurt you. sweetheart, you have to go.”

“my nikolai” you whispered, pushing his damp hair away from his forehead.

he closed his eyes and you couldn’t tell if it was from anger, exhaustion, sadness, or a mix of all of it. “i cannot be yours. i’ve lied to you, i’m a demon, a monster. you can’t possibly want me to be yours.” he spit each word about himself as if it were venom, like the words ripped away a little bit of his humanity, or his confidence.

you shook your head and softly placed your forehead again his, still holding the sides of his face. “no. you’re my nikolai. you always will be.”

you placed two soft kisses on his cheeks, one on each side. “my” kiss, “nikolai,” another kiss.

“oh sweetheart, i am yours” he sighed and opened up his knees so you could fall into his embrace. “i am so sorry.”

“you should be” you mumbled into his chest. “what if you had died nikolai? and i wouldn’t have known what was happening to you until it was too late. i could have helped.”

he kissed the top of your head, still hesitantly. “im a fool, you can spend the rest of my life reminding me. i didn’t want to ruin this, us. it’s the last precious thing i have in my life.”

“we are still precious” you whispered and clung to his shirt like your life depended on it. “the same way you are still the nikolai i have always known, since childhood. you are still good. we will fix this.”

“and if we can’t?” he asked so softly that you almost couldn’t hear him.

“then i’ll have to get just as familiar with the demon as i am with you” you joked.

and the rumble of nikolai’s laughing chest told you that everything would be perfectly fine. demon and all, he was still your nikolai.

taglist;

@deardiarystuff @bookishcrows @kazsimp @vintagebitc @obiwansjedi @thegirlwiththeimpala @hybrid-in-progress @mrs-brekker15 @mrsbrekkers @simplyluvzuko @ode-to-joy @gallysonegoodlung @sixofshadowandbone @castielcouldbeasecretdentist @meiitanoia @caaarstairs @itisroe

if your name is in bold, it means i couldn’t tag you <3

#nikolai lanstov #nikolai lantsov x reader #nikolai x reader #nikolai duology #shadow and bone #six of crows #grishaverse #kaz brekker #six of crows imagine #shadow and bone imagine #leigh bardugo #rae <3

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kimmietea · 4 years ago

Text

Double Yikes! Part 2 (Ben Hardy x Reader)

Summary: Continuation of Double Yikes! Part 1

Warnings: Uhhhh.... Well I don't want to give anything away so...Read at your own risk

Continuation of Yikes! and Double Yikes! Part 1

A/N: Ok I know it's been a LONG time coming but I believe you will all think it was well worth the wait. Now I recommend you reread the whole Yikes! series before you read this one BUT it's not necessary. I've included a bit of where we last left off so you're all not completely lost. Thank you so much for those of you how stuck by and waited this thing out. I debated on telling you all this BUT I do have an idea for anther part... Reader goes to "help" Ben babysit. I haven't started it and I have no idea if I ever will but the idea is there and I promise if I do decide to do it I will write the entire thing first before posting so no one has to wait. Ok no more rambling lets get to it! Don't forget to tell me what you think and Italics is reader thinking to herself in her head!! Enjoy!!

TagList: @borhapqueen92 @radiob-l-a-hblah @gwendolyns-stacy @coincidence-ithinknots-blog @mythicmazzellos @hardforbenhardy @onceuponadetectivedemigod @im-an-adult-ish @theprettyandthereckless @mamaskillerqueen @cupboardzllo @goliveeasy17posts @okilover02 @gwilymleeisbae @youngpastafanmug

******************

"Thank you Ben, I had a really great time." He took a small step forward and placed one hand on your hip, your heart sped up. His hand felt heavy and the heat coming from him being so close spread through your entire body.

"So did I. Thank you for agreeing to go out with me tonight. I never do this kind of thing but I couldn't leave your office without a definite way to see you again." He laughed a little to ease his nerves, his head leaning slightly closer to you.

Oh god ok, breath

"Well I'm very glad you did." You said, much softer than you intended. Ben had his bottom lip trapped between his teeth as his eyes traveled over your face, landing on your lips. He was close and you could feel his breath across your face again, like at the restaurant. His heavy hand still firm on your hip, his thumb now rubbing along soothingly.

Please kiss me

He brought his other hand up to the side of your face, letting the tips of his fingers run over your cheekbone.

Pleeeease kiss me

You took a chance and placed your hand at the nape of his neck, letting your fingers intertwine in his hair. He smiled and licked his lips.

PAH-LEEAS KISS ME DAMN IT!

"Y/N, can I kiss you?" He whispered.

FUCKIN FINALLY!

Too afraid you'd actually say what you were thinking, you nodded. He smiled and leaned in slowly to close the space between you. You instantly felt an electric shock travel through you causing you to move closer towards him and tug on his hair. He moaned into the kiss and slid his hand from your hip to your back, pulling you flush against him.

You sighed at the feeling of him being pressed against you and your lips parted. Ben wasted no time and slid his tongue along yours. You moaned and let your unoccupied hand glide up his torso, feeling his tight muscles under his shirt to rest on his chest. Ben's hand that was near your face moved to join his other on your back.

Your entire body was on fire, your head spinning, either from the intensity of the kiss or the lack of oxygen, you weren't sure. Just when you were about to pull back to see if he wanted to move things inside, he slid one of his hands down to rest on the curve of your ass.

You whined and pushed back into his hand. He moaned and gripped your ass roughly, causing you to involuntarily snap your hips forward into his. He moaned again and finally pulled away. Ben was panting heavily, his lips were swollen and red, his cheeks flushed and warm. You were sure you looked the same.

Alright, say something cool and invite him inside

You opened your mouth to speak but he beat you to it.

"I can't do this." Your heart dropped and you could feel the color drain from your face.

But...but things were going so well. What happened? How did i fuck this up?

You could feel tears start to prick behind your eyes.

Do NOT cry in front of him!

“Right, ok.” You nodded sadly and stepped back, away from him. His hands fell from you and you reached for your keys.

"Wait Y/N, that came out wrong." He grabbed your hand and tried to get you to look at him. You shook your head, putting your keys in the lock and unlocking the door.

"No Ben, it's fine. You don't want to. I get it. No big deal." You managed to get out, finally looking up at him and gave him a tight lipped smile.

"But that’s just it, I do want to! Believe me, I do! God I've only been thinking about it since the moment i fuckin saw you." He laughed at himself and you felt a little better.

"Of course I want to. I mean it's obvious I want to." He gestured vaguely to his crotch where there was a definite bulge. You let your eyes glance down quickly.

God if he's that big after just a kiss I could only imagine...no no, time to focus stop it!

"But I'm supposed to be the perfect gentleman tonight, that’s what I meant, and that is definitely not the gentlemanly thing to do on the first date, as much as I'd love to." He paused.

"Maybe on the second date." He chuckled.

"You want a second date?" You asked, hopeful.

"Of course I do. I had an amazing time. You're smart, well spoken, gorgeous and funny as hell. And that kiss! I absolutely need more of that in my life." You laughed and he took a tentative step towards you. When you didn’t step away he wrapped his arms around you and you rested your head against his chest. His heart was pounding.

"Forgive me?"

You smiled up at him and nodded. He leaned down and kissed you again. It was softer this time, slower. He pulled away gently and rested his forehead against yours, his eyes still closed.

"Can I call you tomorrow?" He whispered.

"Definitely."

Alright if this isn't happening tonight i need to go inside before i start begging

You pecked his soft lips one last time and backed away from him. He took your hand in his before you were completely out of reach.

"Now I need to try to get to my car without any of your neighbors seeing me and think I'm some perv walking around your building with a damn hard on." You barked out a laugh and covered your face with your hand. When your eyes met his again that same look from the car and the restaurant was back. The butterflies also made a comeback.

We were just making out! What's with the butterflies! He is going to be the death of me, I swear.

"Goodnight beautiful, I’ll talk to you tomorrow." He said, kissed your hand.

“Goodnight Ben.” You said and he turned to leave. You entered your apartment and leaned against the door. You let out a frustrated groan.

UGGH. Damn you and your grogeous fuckin face and your perfect gentleman shit, your perfect lips and hands.

You were beyond sexualy fusterated and kicked your shoes off, tossed your purse on the table and went to the kitchen. You looked out the window over the sink just in time to see Ben get to his car. You watched him get in but he didn’t pull away.

I wish he would just come back up here and…

You ran to your purse and grabbed your cell, pressing Ben’s number. You had an idea. It rang twice before he answered.

“Miss me already love?” He joked down the line. His voice sounded so much deeper over the phone and you clenched your legs together. You walked back into the kitchen to watch out the window. He was still there.

“Something like that.” You laughed. “About that second date you mentioned.

“Absolutely, anytime.” You smirked.

“How about in about 10 minuntes?” He laughed

Oh that laugh

"10 minutes huh? Yeah, I think i'm free. What did you have in mind?" You started to make a pot of coffee and cleaned the small pile of dishes in the sink.

"I was thinking coffee maybe? I know this great little spot, super cheap but very good and it's incredibly close by." His deep chuckle made your heart jump and a wide grin spread across your face.

"Perfect. I'm on my way back up." You watched his car door open.

"Wait, give me 10 minutes to change."

"Change? I thought we were just having coffee at your place."

"No, we are. I just want to change." You finished the dishes and went to your room to pick up the clothes on the floor and somewhat make your bed.

"No way." He laughed.

"What?" You asked confused and threw the towels from your shower earlier in the hamper.

I should stop being such a slob

"That's not fair, I can't change."

"But this dress is killing me." You took a look around the room and figured it was good enough.

"Then why did you wear it tonight?"

"Cause I look hot in it!" You explained with a laugh and went back to the kitchen to look for something to have with your coffee. He hummed down the line and it made your toes curl causing you to stumble a little.

Christ, get it together

"Yeah you do."

Mmm he better get up here quick

"You have nothing in the car?" You asked, trying not to focus on the effect his voice alone had on you. You could hear rustling as he looked.

"I have gym clothes from earlier today. Would you like me to put those on?"

Oooh Ben in gym clothes...Ben at the gym, hot, sweaty, panting...tempting

"Depends? How bad do they smell?" You joked.

"Y/N!"

"Fine fine, I won't change. I guess 'Cafe Y/N' is open for business then."

"I'll be right up." He laughed.

I love how easy it is with him

You hung up and finished getting the coffee ready and set it, along with everything else on the small table in the kitchen and put some music on softly in the background. The knock at the door came and your entire body went cold.

Oh fuck why am I so nervous all of a sudden. Get your shit together. Let’s go!

You walked to the door and your heart began to race. If you didn’t know the cause then you’d be worried you were about to have a heart attack. A few more deep breaths, a quick adjustment to your dress and a hair check before you opened the door with fake confidence.

What the shit!

He left his jacket in the car and had untucked his shirt and unbuttoned it completely so the black tank top that was covering his chest could be seen. It also looked like he ran his hands through his hair, breaking it of its hold from whatever product he had used. Or maybe that was from you during the kiss earlier. Either way he looked incredible.

Fuckin hell

“I thought we weren’t changing.” You commented as cool as possible. He laughed and ran a hand through his already tousled hair. Your knees gave out slightly and you gripped the door tighter.

“I didn't change. I altered.” He smirked.

Wow second date Ben is a little cocky...I like

“Cheater, I can’t alter mine.” You joked and moved to the side letting him in. He kissed your cheek as he passed and walked inside.

“I can think of a few ways.” He muttered under his breath.

“What was that?” You asked, smiling to yourself and led him to the kitchen.

“Oh nothing.” His cheeks were pink, his lip bit between his teeth. You took a seat at the table and Ben took the seat closest to you, then moved it even closer, the sides of your thighs touching.

“So welcome to cafe Y/N.” You gestured to the table. “Where the coffee is decent and the cookies are probably stale and expired because I don’t remember buying them.” You laughed with a shrug. Time with Ben seemed to fly by. Before you knew it an hour had gone by. Your nerves had settled enough for you two to just sit, talk and joke freely while you sipped your coffee. Neither of you had dared to touch the cookies.

Ben was telling you about an audition he had coming up when the song changed over. ‘Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow by Roberta Flack started to play and your over anxious mind started to wander and you completely zoned out.

Things are so easy with him. It's never been like this with anyone before. I don’t want to be another notch. What if I never hear from him again after tonight?

“Y/N, you alright love?” Ben asked, pulling you out of your thoughts, his voice laced with concern.

Oh shit how long have I not been paying attention

“Huh? Oh yeah, I’m fine.” You shook your head to get rid of your self destructive thoughts.

No, things are different with Ben. This won't be the last time we see each other, I can feel it.

“You sure?” He asked, one hand on the back on your chair and the other now rubbing soothingly on your thigh. You smiled and placed your hand on top of his, giving it a squeeze.

“Yeah, I��m good. I promise. I think my hair is too tight.” You said and raised your arms to let it out of the bun. You pulled the hair tie and ran your fingers through your hair. You groaned as the tension in your head broke, relief washed over you. Because you put it up earlier when it was wet, it had dried in nice, flowing waves. You ran your hand though it a few more times before letting it settle over your shoulder. When your eyes landed on Ben again he was staring at you. A look of awe on his face. Now it was your turn to ask.

"You ok?" You asked with an amused smile.

"My god you are truly breathtaking." He breathed. It felt like the wind was knocked from you, hard to breath. Like when you were a kid roller skating and you fell on your bottom, your breath ripped from your lungs.

Well that’s different

You ducked your head, letting your hair fall over your face to hide your now red cheeks. Ben’s hand that was on the back of your chair moved to push your hair from your face and stayed on the slope of your neck.

“You don’t need to hide from me.” He said softly. The air in your small kitchen felt thick and heavy. The pull towards him that you were feeling all night was stronger now than ever. You heard the song switch over, ‘Movement by Hozier’. It only added to the charge in the room.

Perfect

His hand on your thigh moved just enough so the very tips of his fingers slid the tiniest bit under the hem of your dress. The heat from his hand spread though your entire body making you yearn for more of his touch. You pressed into his hand on your neck and he leaned forward. Your hand found its way to the back of his neck again, tangling in his hair and pulling him closer, pressing your foreheads together. His hand moved from your neck to your hair, mirroring you. His other hand moved again, now the entire length of his fingers under your dress. Your eyes slipped shut and you took a shaky breath, you moved to let your lips touch his just the slightest bit, barely touching.

“I don’t want you to think I do this all the time.” He whispered against your lips.

“I don’t.” You whispered back. He pressed the smallest kiss to your lips before returning to just resting there.

“There’s something different about you.” He confessed.

Are you a mind reader

“It’s just...it’s easy with you.”

Definitely a mind reader

“You feel it too right? Please don’t say it’s just me?” Even with your eyes closed you could tell he had a worried expression on his beautiful face. He knew just what to say to make any worries you had vanish in seconds.

“No, It’s not. I feel it too.” You felt his lips stretch into a smile before he finally pressed them to yours in a proper kiss. It was nothing like the kiss at your door, that was soft and gentle. Now it was hot, needy and a little rough. Knowing you both were on the same page had changed things, you didn't need to be so cautious and nervous anymore.

Both of your hands were in his hair, scratching his scalp and tugging at it gently only to be rewarded with the most amazing moans and groans from him. His hand moved from your hair down to your back pulling you closer to him, you would be flush against him if it wasn't for the angle you were sitting. His other hand moved to the inside of your thigh, gripping the soft flesh in his rough hand.

Come on just a bit higher

You're not sure how much time had passed but by the time he pulled away and moved to your neck, you were a panting mess. Your head was spinning as Ben nipped and kissed your neck, your breathing so uneven you could barely get any words together.

“Ben” You panted, he hummed against your skin in response but refused to detach himself. You moaned at the vibrations and you thought about how wonderful that would feel someplace else. Your hand tightened in his hair and he groaned, biting on your skin harder than before and tightening his grip on your thigh.

“Fuck, Ben.” He smirked against you and moved to your collarbone where he pressed soft kisses. The change helped to slow your breathing and stop your head from spinning so much. You tried to get his attention again.

“Ben” You managed to get out a whisper.

“What is it love?” He pulled back and looked into your eyes. They were just as stunning as the first time you saw them earlier that day. Same unplaceable green shade, only now much darker, filled with lust and desire. His face flushed and hair was a mess.

Fuck he is beautiful

“Bedroom?” You asked, hopeful. He smiled sweetly before pressing a kiss to your lips. He stood and held his hand out for you to take.

“Lead the way.” You stood on shaky legs and took his hand. You stumbled on the way to your room. Ben pressed himself fully against your back, his excitement for what was happening very evident. With his hands gripping your waist and his lips attached to your neck, you tried not to run into the door frame on your way into the room.

Once in your room Ben kicked his shoes off while continuing his endless stream of kisses and bites on your neck. He brushed your hair to one side and laid it over your shoulder, revealing your entire upper back to him. His hands gently touched and caressed the exposed skin everywhere he could. His lips flowing close behind, leaving soft kisses every place his hands touched.

Your skin was on fire, the wetness between your legs building with every press of his lips, a few more minutes and you'd feel it drip down your legs for sure. Ben moved his hands to the zipper on your dress and kissed his way to your ear.

"This okay?" He breathed and tugged on the zipper gently. You nodded, needing to feel his hands on your skin again. He slowly unzipped your dress, crouching to let his lips follow all the way to the end, at your lower back. When he stood again he brought his hands to your shoulders, gently pushing the straps down. You raised your arms, letting the dress drop to the floor and pool at your feet.

Your heart was racing as you stood there almost naked. Your nerves were skyrocketing. You closed your eyes and tried to steady your breathing. You felt Ben move from behind you to stand in front of you. His hand cupping the side of your face and his thumb running along your bottom lip.

"You alright my darling?" He asked gently. You took another deep breath and nodded, opening your eyes again.

"Nervous." You explained with a slight laugh. He chuckled and stepped in close.

"Don't be." He said. With his bottom lip between his teeth and his eyes even darker than before, he let his eyes glace down to your body, drinking you in before meeting your gaze again.

"You're perfect."

Fuckin wet! My god I could probably cum from his voice alone.

He ran his hands over your now exposed sides and down to your waist, pulling you flush against him. You slid your hands under his opened button down and pushed it off his shoulders, letting it drop to the floor with your dress.

Oh pin me to the wall with those arms!

You shift your hands down to his waist, letting them skim over his muscled arms on the way. You pulled the tank up over his toned stomach and chest, he raised his arms to let you remove it and it joined the pile on the floor. Your nails scratch gently down his chest, to his waist where you made quick work of removing his belt and pants. You rubbed over his bulge and he moaned, grabbing your face and pressing a searing kiss to your lips.

You continued to rub over him, feeling him grow harder as his tongue slid against yours. His hands moved from your face to your hair, he gripped a hand full and tugged gently. You hummed and squeezed him in your hand, he moaned and let one hand drop to your wrist, stopping you.

"Bed, now." He demanded, his eyes almost black, lips red and puffy and his breathing, much like yours was erratic.

Oh fuck, yes sir!

You jumped up on the bed, head propped up by the pillows. You let your eyes drift over his body as he stood by the side of the bed. He really was a sight. Every muscle sculpted to perfection, clear soft skin, you could go on for hours really. He looked at you with that small smirk of his that you were beginning to realise only came out when he was feeling a little brash.

“What’s that look for?”

“Just…” You let your eyes slowly rake over him again while you rubbed at your thighs. You licked your lips, making a show of it, before capturing the bottom one between your teeth.

“Admiring.” You finished in a sensual tone. He brushed a hand over his chest and stomach almost self-conscious or embarrassed before he joined you on the bed and crawled up your body until he reached your lips where he kissed you again. You let yourself melt into it, into him. Completely lost in the feel of his hands on your neck and face, the slick glide of his lips on yours. You didn't notice him maneuver himself so his leg was between yours until his knee was pressed hard against your center. You moaned loudly and grounded down against him. He moved his lips to your ear.

"That's it love, I wanna hear everything you've got." He whispered and moved his lips down, kissing over your collarbone to the tops of your breasts. His hands moved to your back, unclipped your bra and removed it completely. You sighed in relief, immediately followed by a moan as Ben took a nipple between his teeth. You arched into him suddenly desperate for more. Your hands flew to his hair as he started to suck.

“Oh fuck!” The feel of his tongue combined with the sensation of his sucking was driving you wild. You could feel your wetness start to soak through your underwear. He let his teeth scarpe over the sensitive bud before replacing his mouth with his hand and switching to the other. Your hands moved from his hair to his back where you ran your nails up and down. He dropped from his knees and rutted his hips against yours. His moan vibrated through your breast and over your entire body causing you to moan in turn. The pressure in your lower abdomen was growing at an alarming rate. The slick feeling between your legs almost like a slip and slide.

Christ am I about to cum from this alone!?

"Ben please….oh god...fuck Ben, stop stop! Please." He immediately stopped and looked up at you, worry etched in his features. You were sweaty and panting wildly, eyes screwed shut.

"Oh my god are you alright?"

Unable to form any words you nodded yes.

"Bad?" He asked fearfully.

"NO!" You shot up, eyes opened wide and almost headbutting him in the process.

Smooth

"Good! Very good, almost too good. “ You laid your head back down and closed your eyes again, trying to regain your breathing.

“I just...oh fuck, I just need a second. Holy fuck that has never happened to me before. This was all about to be over very quickly." You rambled. He threw his head back and laughed.

What I would give to make him laugh every day

"Oh, I like you." He sighed and moved his hand to gently caress over the side of your face. You cracked one eye open to look at him skeptically. A grin stretched across his face.

“What?” he chuckled. You closed your eyes again and made a face.

“I like you too.” You let out a squeak as he captured your lips with his once more. This kiss much like the one at the door, slow and sweet. You moaned, your hands sliding up and down his back encouragingly. He deepened the kiss, brushing his tongue against yours with such passion it caused you to buck your hips just slightly into his.

I never want this to end

Ben pulled away placing sweet pecks to your lips before pushing himself up to his knees again.

“Shall we pick up where we left off?” You chuckled and nodded.

“Let's just stay clear of this area for right now.” You said gesturing to your chest. He hummed and brought a hand to the side of your breast and massaged it gently. A shiver ran through your body and you clenched your legs together.

“Fine, but next time I’m going to worship your gorgeous body and I’m spending extra time up here.”

Next time? Does he really mean that or is he just saying it?

“Next time?”

“Next time.” He promised leaning down to kiss you once more before trailing down to your neck. You brought your hands up to tangle in his hair as he bit at a sensitive spot.

"Oh fuck." You sighed. He hummed in response and ran his tongue over the bite.

“I can’t wait to taste you.” He muttered into your skin, breathing in and taking in your scent. You shuddered at his words and whimpered when you raised your hips and was met with nothing as he hovered above you. He brought his lips up to your ear and took your lower lobe between his teeth. With one hand holding himself up he brought the other to the side of your neck. The heavy weight on your throat made your heart beat faster and your center throb. You covered his hand with yours and pressed, he got the hint instantly and tightened his grip. You moaned, bucking your hips again.

"Are you wet for me love?" He whispered, running his tongue along the shell of your ear. Unable to think clear enough to form words you nodded and whined.

"Use your words Y/N." His grip on your throat loosened and you took a deep breath before answering.

"Yes! So wet Ben, all for you." Your voice was hoarse. He smirked against your skin.

"That's my good girl." Your hand tightened in his hair at the praise. It was then you realized that you both still had your underwear on. That one final barrier keeping you from what you wanted.

"Ben... p-please." You pleaded. Desperate to get some friction, you rubbed your thighs together. Deciding to take some pity on you, he removed his hand from your throat and ran it down your body. Goosebumps followed in his wake, erupting over your skin. His hand slid between your legs and you gasped when it settled over your mound and the coolness of his fingertips touched the spot where you ached for him most.

You groaned and started to grind against his hand. His middle finger slipped under the cloth barrier and ever so slightly through your folds, gathering some of the wetness.

"Ben come on." You bucked your hips to meet his hand as he pulled it away.

"All in good time love" He said with a grin and brought his finger up to his lips. You watched with wide eyes as he pushed his finger into his mouth. His eyes slid shut and he moaned around his finger. You had enough of his teasing and decided to move things along a little faster. You sat up as best you could and flipped you both over. You settled on top, your legs straddling his waist.

“Damn” He sighed and looked up at you in awe. You smirked and began to grind against him. You could feel his hardness growing more under you. His hands gripped your waist and pulled you closer as his hips met yours. The friction of your underwear rubbing against you was just what you needed. Before you got too close you stopped to shimmy his boxers down his muscular thighs, groaning at the site of his large cock, red at the tip and leaking. You licked your lips unconsciously and took him in your hand, he gasped and pushed himself up on his elbows to kiss you again. Groaning as you pumped him, he moaned loudly when he looked down and saw your hand wrapped around him.

The pink color high on his cheeks and the darker red spreading from his neck down his chest spurred you on. Feeling neglected you brought one hand to the front of your underwear and began slowly rubbing your clit in a circular motion. Ben’s eyes moved from your hand on him to your hand on yourself. He licked his lips and groaned at the sight. He took hold of both your wrists, stopping your motions and quickly flipped you both back to your original position. His beautiful jade eyes, impossibly dark and his tongue darts out to lick his lips, like he’s about to eat a delicious treat. He leaned down placing his lips briefly on yours before making his way south, showering your stomach with warm and wet opened mouth kisses. Your heart beating fast as he brushes his nose over your underwear, right above your mound. Your breath hitched as he places a long and chaste kiss upon it.

“Ben” You warned, having had enough of his torment. He chucked and pressed another kiss to your clothed core.

“Alright love, no more teasing.” He hooked his fingers under the elastic of your underwear, dragging them down your legs quickly and tossing them over his shoulder. He pulled your legs apart to make room for himself before he laid down on his stomach and pulled you closer to him.

“Goddamm,” he breathed, softly moving his finger up and down your folds, “You really are wet for me aren't you, beautiful? Fuck” he curses under his breath. You moved your hands to his hair and gave it a hard tug. His eyes slid shut and he let out the most pornographic growl yet and rutted his hips against the bed. You loosened your grip and just rested your hands on his head. His eyes slowly opened and traveled up your body to meet yours. You raised a questioning eyebrow, his face was red and flushed.

“So I have a thing about hair pulling.” He confessed with a shy smile.

“I see that.” Your hands raked gently through his hair. He closed his eyes and hummed at the sensation. Without warning he threw your legs onto his shoulders and lowered his head. Your breath hitched before he’d even done anything making him chuckle between your thighs, his cool breath hitting your wetness. You gasped as his tongue pressed against your clit, swirling circles on the sensitive bud. His strong hand firmly on your hips, keeping you in place.

“Hummm,” the vibration makes your whole body tremble before Ben tilts his head to nibble softly at your inner tigh, “You taste fucking amazing,” he adds before diving back in. Relishing in the feeling of your hands in his hair, he moaned against you.

“Plea- Oh, fuck.” Your voice dies in a gasp and your back arches as he delves his tongue in, caressing your most sensitive parts and it feels soft and wet and silky. It tingles and you struggle to breathe as he meticulously swirls his tongue all over. You had never been so sensitive before, so responsive.

He definitely knows what he’s doing

You notice he ruts against the mattress every so often to get some relief for himself. You smirk and give his hair a light tug. He responds with a moan and a quick rut against the bed, as if it was a reflex. You wait a few seconds and try again, same response. You went back to gently raking your fingers through his hair while his tongue worked you over. Soon you feel the familiar knot in your stomach before he pulls back a little and presses his thumb against your clit. You gasp as the change in pressure and it's good but you miss the warmth of his tongue.

"Ben" you breathe, trying to tell him but the words die out. He's there with you and seems to know exactly what you need and he swirls his tongue around your clit and you’re there shockingly fast. You’re almost there… your head sinks into the mattress and you dig your fingers into his hair, your ribs moving fast unashamedly grinding on his face at the rhythm of your breathing and you’re fucking there-

"Ben, close, I'm- I'm close." He pulled away ever so slightly, talking against you.

"Go on love, i'm not stopping at just one" His skilled tongue goes back to working wonders, sending shocks of pleasure to your core, his face deep in you, moving up and down, side to side. You can’t take your eyes off of him as he grabs hold of your thighs, pulling you even closer and you grind your hips against his face, trying so desperately to rush your release, already excited at the promise of more. Your whole body reacts to the sensations, and you’re loud as you moan and gasp and he keeps your hips steady in his hold. He groans against your wetness as he wraps his lips around your clit and begins to suck. Your legs start to shake as a wave of pleasure overtakes your senses and renders you breathless. He continues to gently lick you through your orgasm, finally pulling away when your body goes slack.

“Fuck.” You breathed out. Ben propped himself back up on his elbows so he could see you properly. A satisfied smirk on his now glistening face.

“You ok love?” He asked and even though your eyes were shut you could tell he was smiling.

I can barely think let alone answer you right now

“Y/N?” He urged when you didn't answer.

Ughh, I’ve just been pleasured to the brink of comatose, just give me a second

You just barely lifted your hand to wave him off. He chucked. His fingers began to explore. Traveling up your inner thigh gently. His soft touch slowly brings you back down from your high. They reached your folds, the tip of his index finger ran gently up and down your wet opening. Your breathing began to pick up again and you left out a soft moan.

“Alright darling, i’ll make this one quick.” He sits up on his shins and slides two of his thick fingers into you and begins to thrust at a quick but gentle rhythm. In a matter of seconds you were back to a panting mess, clenching tight around his fingers. The sound of his digits inside you filled the room, making you moan louder than before. Ben curls his fingers, as if looking for something.

“Oh, shit,” you curse between harsh breaths when he finds the spot he’s been looking for. You’re a withering heep in no time, nothing but moans and mumbles of Ben over and over again.

“Go on, nice and loud for me good girl.” The praise drives you to let out the loudest moan yet followed by a yell of his name. His fingers rubbed mercilessly against that spot deep inside you, never letting up. The endless waves of pleasure washed over you bringing you close to tears. You were so close, only needing a little more.

“More.” You managed to get out, Ben knew exactly what you needed and brought his thumb to your clit, working on the sensitive nub with the sole mission to make you come. Your core tightens and tightens and you’re a wreck. You arch your back and his fingers continue to stroke and rub until you start to spasm into climax for the second time that night. He carefully removes his fingers as you settle back on the bed. Ben makes his way up the bed via a trail of soft kisses wherever he could reach, and settles down next to you. His lips find their way to your neck and up to your ear where he whispers.

“I have something to confess...about this morning.”

This morning?

“Huh?” You asked in a slight daze.

“At the office.” You could feel his smile against you.

Oh thats right you big dumb slut, you met this man TODAY! UGGHH It’s fine, IT’S FINE, it’s fine.

“Yeah” He propped himself up on one shoulder so he could look at you. You turned your head to look at him. His face was pink and still a bit glisteny from before. His hair, a mess with a single curl hanging over his forehead. His jade green eyes, a few shades darker but bright and shining. His smile, soft, almost shy.

Fuck me up, he is so beautiful

“I umm...i heard you.” His eyes met yours. It took you a minute to realize what he was talking about.

NO! Ok ok ok, it’s fine really. Ok. See what he actually heard.

“Umm, what uh. What are you talking about?” You tried to play it cool but there was no way he didn’t pick up on the panic in your voice and on your face. He laughed, his smile bright and shining.

“Yikes.” He answered.

Ok well that’s not that bad.

The moment flashed in your head.

**“Morgan, who am i talking to today?” You asked looking down at the papers in her hand.

“Uhh…” She flipped through the papers trying to find you an answer. She stopped on one page and read over it quickly before flipping to another until she found it.

“Wow okay, it’s..” She was cut off by the door opening and your boss walked it with the man you were about to interview.

“Oh Y/N perfect, this is Ben Hardy.” He said with a smile and you looked up from the papers to lock eyes with the beautiful blonde actor.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you.” He said with a smile and stepped forward with his hand out to shake. His voice had a deep and creamy tone, it wrapped around you like a warm blanket, working its way under your skin where it wreaked havoc on your insides and stole your breath.

“Yikes.” You breathed you out just barely above a whisper. Morgan, standing that close, definitely heard you and her head snapped over to look at you stunned. You were never at a loss, this was really something. Your head was going a million miles a minute.**

“Also wet.” You grounded and he laughed again pressing a kiss to your shoulder.

**“Ready?” You asked Ben with a smile.

“Ready.” He answered and slid his phone back into his pocket. You watched as his eyes moved from the floor, over your body slowly and finally meeting your gaze where he licked his lips and pulled the bottom one between his teeth to bite on before letting it go and a smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth.

“Wet”

“What?”

“What!”

“I thought you said something.” He said a hint of blush covering his cheeks.**

Your hands were now covering your red face. Ben's fingers moved to run through your hair, doing his best to reassure you.

“Don’t be embarrassed, sweets. I only had to go to the toilet because I was half hard. Honestly I was on my way to a full blown boner, I had to leave for a minute.” That made you feel a little better and you lowered your hands enough so you could just peek at him over the tips of your fingers.

“But then… I heard you and Morgan when I came back.”

“BENJAMIN!” You yelled and rolled over to hide your face in his chest. His laugh rang out in the room and he wrapped his arms around you.

**“Uggh stop please. I have never been so embarrassed. He’s so sweet and funny, and the way he talks. Not just the accent but the words he uses and how he carries himself. I just melt at the fuckin thought of him.”

“I wouldn’t be too embarrassed, he’s clearly into you as well.” She said and patted your knee.

“Yeah well if he is, he is doing a much better job of being subtle. I couldn't even tell you what some of his answers were. All I can think about when he talks is how amazing it would be to have him whisper into my neck all the dirty things he wants to do to me while his big strong hands run all over me.”

Morgan opened her mouth to say something but the sound of the door closing caught both of you off guard and you looked to see Ben standing by the now closed door.

“Everything alright ladies?” He asked with a smile and your entire body felt like it was on fire. You were sure your face was beat red.**

“Ok no more embarrassing Y/N! Bang time!” You pulled out of his arms and pushed him on his back.

“Bang time?” He laughed again. “We were just having a cute moment.”

“Yes, well cute moment over. Deal with it.” You said throwing a leg over him to straddle his waist. You leaned down, bringing your lips to his and chuckled through the kiss. His hand tangled in your hair while the other slid down to your hip and squeezed, encouraging you to move over him. You rocked your hips against him and in no time he was matching your rhythm. Your kisses grew messy to the point where you were just panting against each other's mouths. You stopped your hips and gave him a proper kiss before you sat up and began to grind against him again.

“Oh fuck.” You moaned at the new position. His hard cock was lined up with you perfectly, everything slick and hot. Ben's strong hands moved to run up and down your thighs, gripping them tightly along the way.

“My god you are so fuckin’ beautiful.” He moaned. You looked down and saw his bright red face, neck and chest. His hair, a sweaty disheveled mess. You smiled and winked at him.

“Uggh Y/N please! You’re killin me.” He begged with a wide smile. You knew exactly what he wanted. You laughed, slowed your hips and gestured to the bedside table.

“Top drawer blondie”

“Yes!” He cheered and reached back to dig in your drawer.

I love that I can laugh with you

With a triumphant smile on his face he handed you the foil packet and you placed it on him. You leaned forward and placed a kiss on his lips before you sat back and lowered yourself onto him. As he slid inside you slowly, you felt every inch of him until he was completely inside you.

“Fuckin hell.” He shuddered out, his hand laid gently on your hips, his thumbs rubbing soothing circles. You hummed and slowly began to rock back and forth. Once you adjusted to him, he grabbed your hips and started moving you on top of him. You placed your hands on his chest to keep yourself balanced as he gathered speed and power. Soon you were bouncing with the force of his thrusts. Your thighs were burning from trying to stay up.

“Ben.” You gasped.

“Tired?” He asked. Of course he knew, you nodded. He slowed his thrusts and pulled you down so you were flushed against him. He wrapped his strong arms around you and without separating flipped you over. Your legs almost shook with relief.

“You need a minute?” He asked, still holding you close. You took a couple deep breaths before answering.

“Hell no” He laughed and pressed a kiss to your lips.

“That’s my girl.” He winked and with a groan, he sat up and pulled your tired legs up and over his shoulders pushing himself inside deeper. The new angle had his tip pressed up against that perfect spot. It took you by surprise causing your eyes to fly open and your wall clench around him. He let out a low, long grown and hung his head.

“This is going to be over very quickly.” He confessed.

“Then make it rough.” He raised his eyebrows in surprise. It surprised you too but you didn’t regret it.

“Yeah?” He asked, wanting to make sure that’s what you really wanted.

“Give me what you got, lover boy.” He laughed and shook his head.

“You’re gonna be the death of me.” He placed a soft kiss to the inside of your knee before he started his thrusts again. He built up a good rhythm and then with all his strength pounded into you.

“Fuck yeah” You moaned and had to place your hands agint the headboard to keep from banging your head on it with how hard he was going. His strong hands gripped tight on your hips, holding you as close as possible. You were certain you would have bruises in the morning.

You could feel your core tightening again, signaling you were close to finishing.

“Ben...close” You managed to get out between breaths.

“I’m right there with you love.” He said not letting up on his thrusts. Feeling the coil tighten in your stomach, the sweat beading on your forehead, the air in the room thick and hot, making it hard to breath, you finally released with a shout of his name. Ben soon finished after you continued riding out your high. He gently pulled out and lowered your legs. He cleaned himself and you up with his discarded tank top before laying down next to you to catch his breath. After a few minutes of the two of you just laying their regrouping he spoke quietly while looking up to the ceiling.

“I uhh… also heard you and Morgan before I came into your office.”

** You went back to your office where Morgan was waiting for you.

“Oh my god pleeease tell me something happened after I left.” She begged the second you walked in the door. You laughed and shook your head.

“Seriously!” She groaned.

“I mean, I thought maybe he was going to say something but Max came in and took him to his office."

"Ugh that sucks. I thought for sure he was gonna ask you out or at least throw you up against the wall and make sweet, passionate love to you."

"Morgan!"

"What!?" She laughed and you cracked a smile. You really would be lost without her.

"Knock knock." Both you and Morgan jumped, her knocking the phone off your desk in the process, and turned to your open door to see Ben.**

“MORTIFIED!” You yelled with a laugh and rolled over to kiss him.

#ben hardy #ben hardy x reader #ben hardy imagine #ben hardy smut #yikes

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antebunny · 4 years ago

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April 25: ribbons

A Swan Maiden Fairy Tale Fusion

Lan Wangji is a huntsman who happens upon a pond in the woods. He sees this epic coat thing made from raven feathers on the banks and goes “wow this is so cool and so pretty i should give it to my brother” and picks it up. Then he sees this guy on the shore and freaks out wondering if he’s dead, but he’s not, he’s just unconscious & naked. So Lan Wangji wraps him up and brings him home, because he’s nice. Then the guy wakes up, introduces himself as “wei ying, courtesy wuxian”, sees the feather cloak and says “nice…cloak you got there”

“it is a gift for my brother”

“ah. Right…when’s ur brother getting here?”

“i will visit him when the snow melts”

“k. Cool. guess im staying here until then”

“can you not go home?”

Wei Wuxian eyes crinkle like he’s sharing a private joke: “Not until the snow melts”

Lan Wangji is a good host and doesn’t know how he feels about this guy just declaring that he’ll live with him for the next several months but…okay.

Lan Wangji finds out very quickly that Wei Wuxian isn’t normal, and it doesn't take him long after that to guess that Wei Wuxian also isn’t entirely human. He’s a very bad houseguest, he just sits, doesn’t know how to cook or anything really, and talks at Lan Wangji while Lan Wangji makes them breakfast. He follows Lan Wangji everywhere he goes with no explanation, just invites himself along. He talks while Lan Wangji is trying to hunt but somehow that doesn’t scare away the game. He flinched the first time Lan Wangji’s arrow found a mark, and insisted on honoring the fallen bird before returning. He passes time whistling and carves himself a flute, they play duets and Lan Wangji finds himself composing something on his guqin in the early morning while Wei Wuxian is still asleep on the floor. Wei Wuxian introduces him to spice, which he hates, but watching Wei Wuxian’s face light up isn’t something he thinks he can ever get tired of.

Wei Wuxian talks a lot about his home and his family, which is apparently a port by a river delta, which is how Lan Wangji learns that Wei Wuxian a very good swimmer, like everyone else there, and that he and his brother are constantly pushing each other in the lake, that he goes out to the pier to drink at night, that he has the best big sister who makes lotus and pork rib soup and stops Wei Wuxian from fighting with his brother, who is an angery smol one but also the best little brother ever (how this is possible, Lan Wangji doesn’t know, it’s clear Wei Wuxian loves his brother even if he spends most of the time making fun of him)

Lan Wangji doesn’t understand why Wei Wuxian can’t return to this home he’s heard so much about, doesn’t know why he found Wei Wuxian abandoned & naked by the side of the pond, but decides that Wei Wuxian is magic and it’s a magic pond, and if his family would leave him in that state, they don’t deserve him. He works up the courage to ask “wei ying. When the snow melts. Stay with me.” and Wei Wuxian is Conflicted bc he likes Lan Wangji and would like to stay but hates that he has to and maybe won’t see his family ever again. In the end all he says is “okay” and Lan Wangji is Very Happy. He also sees Wei Wuxian eyeing the feather cloak often but he already said he’d give it to his brother and doesn’t know how to offer it to Wei Wuxian. But then Wei Wuxian says “guess you’re not giving it to your brother now” which is basically how Lan Wangji thinks Wei Wuxian asks for things so he just nods vaguely.

Wei Wuxian guesses pretty early that Lan Wangji doesn’t know the full extent of what he’s done, and he clearly doesn’t know who Wei Wuxian is, but that’s not surprising. He decides not to tell him, because why would he? On the off-chance that Lan Wangji will just...give it back to him? Wei Wuxian has heard the Swan Maiden tale, he's has seen the worst parts of humanity; he can’t trust that.

It’s been raining a lot recently, which means Lan Wangji has less opportunity to hunt, and it’s harder to hunt after rain. He goes to the nearest town to trade when his supplies get too low (Wei Wuxian comes with obviously) and there the gossip is that some villagers swear up and down that they saw purple lightning (Wei Wuxian isn’t surprised, just sighs and says “of course”) which means that Sandu Shengshou is angry! And that the Lady of Lotus Blossoms, who usually blesses typical goddess things like matchmaking and fertility/childbirth, has 1) stopped and 2) started leaving white lotus blossoms behind, which means that she’s mourning which is sad and terrible! (Wei Wuxian agrees that her being sad is terrible and gets misty-eyed. Lan Wangji wasn’t aware that Wei Wuxian held her in such high regard).

In town, Wei Wuxian gets Lan Wangji better deals, flirts with some girls which makes Lan Wangji sad for unknown reasons, gets harassed by some guys which is how Lan Wangji confirms that Wei Wuxian is not human/magic bc in the dark & rainy night his eyes looked red and his teeth in the moonlight looked too long and too sharp, and no one heard from Wen Chao again. Lan Wangji also buys him clothes

The snow melts. Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian set off to visit Lan Xichen. Wei Wuxian isn’t wearing the cloak and Lan Wangji doesn’t understand why? But doesn’t ask because he never does. They get to the lake where Lan Wangji found Wei Wuxian and wait for Lan Xichen to meet them there, meanwhile Wei Wuxian hisses at a peacock and talks to a sparrow (Lan Wangji doesn’t question it. He never does), then Lan Xichen arrives and at the same time purple lightning flashes and a young man descends from the sky dressed in rich purple silks followed by a lady dressed in lavender and rose pink. they’re easily recognizable as Sandu Shengshou, the Lord of the heavenly Lotus Pier, and the Lady of Lotus Blossoms, his sister and the Lady of Lotus Pier. Lan Xichen is like “wangji wtf is going on” meanwhile Jiang Cheng accuses Lan Wangji of kidnapping his brother, and Jiang Yanli is like “we’re willing to bargain for our brother back. what do you want?”

Lan Wangji: "If he’s ur brother why did you abANDON him"

Jiang Cheng: "how DARE we’ve been searching for him for MONTHS ever since you TOOK him"

"i found him abandoned so i took him home to PROTECT him"

"that’s a fancy way of saying you decided to keep him like an exotic pet"

"i did no such thing"

"then why did you keep that!?" Jiang Cheng points at the feather cloak and everyone looks

Lan Xichen: "oh no"

Lan Wangji: "what"

Lan Xichen: "wangji. the swan maiden"

Lan Wangji: *remembers the story about the swan maiden who left her swan feathers by the side of the pond while she bathed and the huntsman who took her feathers and thus took her, forced her to marry him and bear him three children, before she found her feathers, after which she yeeted outta there with her three children and never left the heavens again, leaving huntsman to die of a broken heart.*

Lan Wangji hadn’t even considered it, maybe because Wei Wuxian was sleeping and therefore didn’t beg for the feather cloak back, maybe bc he made a weak joke instead of flat-out asking Lan Wangji what he planned to do, maybe because his wasn’t pure and white but rather made of raven feathers and pitch black

Also Wei Wuxian got roaring drunk that’s how he ended up there. Jiang Cheng is like “just bc my brother is the stupidest dumb person to ever idiot–” “hey!” “does not mean you can just taKE ADVANTAGE of him”

Anyway Lan Wangji freaks tf out and practically throws the feather cloak back at Wei Wuxian, who hasn’t been meeting his eyes and not saying anything this whole time and tries to apologize. Jiang Yanli grabs it and her brother and walks into the lake, pink and cream lotus blossoms blooming under her feet; she doesn’t sink under the surface. She stands in the middle and they both go under. Then Wei Wuxian arises in his full black-and-red glory, Jiang Cheng shoots Lan Wangji one last glare and then the three of them promptly disappear into the heavens

Lan Xichen holds Lan Wangji for the first time in years while he cries. He stutters his way through an explanation of what happened the past three months, saying again and again that he didn’t know, he noticed that Wei Wuxian wasn’t human and a little bit magic but he didn’t expect this and he didn’t realize that he was preventing Wei Wuxian from leaving. Lan Xichen says things like “i believe you” and “you’re not a terrible person, you just made a terrible mistake”

Eventually Lan Wangji stops hyperventilating, and that’s when a flock of crows leaves their roosts, the wind shrieks, and Wei Wuxian descends again. Lan Wangji doesn’t understand how Wei Wuxian could possibly forgive him, or how someone like Wei Wuxian could possibly take interest in a lonely huntsman like Lan Wangji, but Wei Wuxian holds his hand out and says that he promised to take Lan Wangji on a tour of his home (lotus pier!!), and his eyes do that thing and he says “well? Are you coming?” and how can Lan Wangji say no?

#antebunny's april prompts #spring fest 2021 #mdzs #wangxian #fairy tale au #fic outline #if you ask what this has to do with ribbons i will Smite you

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kaminohana · 3 years ago

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the meme man full analysis

Yeehaw here we go. Analysis of Mikoto Kayano’s video and song, along with some theories about the many themes and symbols in the video. Note: If there’s any other supplemental material for him out there, I haven’t read it. This is just an analysis with the music video we were given. If I happen to miss stuff that was mentioned before, I may talk about it in another post lmao

I was SUPER invested in this video as I watched it and soon realized “Oh shit, I think Mikoto’s plural”. Cuz, you know, I’m plural too (not disclosing what kind) and it felt SO good to see some actual parallels to stuff I go through- though of course not to Mikoto’s degree.

That said, I feel I should make a disclaimer in passing: yes, portraying your only plural character as homicidal ain’t the best representation. But, you know, we’ve seen other cases like that in Milgram so I’m just gonna leave it at that. Personally, I’m not that offended because the execution is SO top-notch. Though, hey, I totally understand how this can be very frustrating to other systems to see plurality depicted in such an unhealthy light- if it’s not for you, it’s not for you.

Keep in mind the point of the Milgram series is to make you uncomfortable in so quickly incriminating someone; if you’re hesitating to determine someone as guilty, hey, that’s probably intended and good! It’s about personal decision, so I’m not going to judge you one way or the other in voting. I just find it fascinating how these videos can put us in such conflict. This is all just my own perspective, BTW, so if you disagree with some of these points, good! I’m just hoping to share my thoughts since I can make a lot of connections. I’m by no means an expert in plurality or tarot, I just have some background in both and decided to try my hand at this analysis, so I really don’t the final say on what’s going on in the video.

Now, onto the actual video analysis.

I’m sticking with the basic idea that Mikoto is split into two parts; his more loveable, gentler side, which I referred to in another post as Softboy Mikoto, and the more violent side which may be acting as a catharsis to his frustrations. I referred to this side previously as the Devil alter, as he is depicted with the Devil major arcana tarot card. I can see how this could be taken badly, so for now I’m just going to refer to him as the shadow alter. There are many themes of duality in the video, most commonly with the symbol of the half moon which appears so many times. Shadow of the moon etc etc. I’ll be bringing this up several times as I analyze the lyrics. I’ll be breaking down the lyrics as evidence to support the idea that Mikoto is plural, and to show how softboy Mikoto (and shadow alter Mikoto) view this particular relationship and how this culminates in murder. Sometimes I refer to Mikoto (as a whole), softboy Mikoto, or shadow alter Mikoto depending on what I’m trying to describe in the below.

First piece: the title. MeMe. Me x2. A dead giveaway, like Umbilical. Also, it can be a meme, which is interesting taking the definition of the word meme in this context: “an element of a culture or system of behavior passed from one individual to another by imitation or other nongenetic means” (Oxford Dictionaries). HMMMM. I know memes are generally within the context of a community, but I think it’s interesting to actually apply this to Mikoto. What exactly is being passed on? Could we argue that Mikoto’s frustrations from one of his parts is being passed on to the other? Interesting to think about, though it may not be relevant.

Going into the lyrics:

So from here I’m guessing there was a point in Mikoto’s life where his plurality was not an issue; or, potentially, there was a time before his split. These were the good times.

Playing dead vs. being alive – representing duality. May refer to how, when one side has their way, the other is locked away in the headspace with no control, thus feeling like being dead. In the context of “if only”, perhaps he’s wishing that he just didn’t do anything if only to prevent things from getting this far.

“If” I could end- I believe Mikoto (particularly softboy Mikoto) is saying “Hey, I have no control over my other side. If I did, would things still be the same? Would I still be ‘letting’ this happen?”

“Keep it” and “hide it away” I feel like are both representative of his shadow alter and of the desires that alter represents. Many words related to destruction are tied to this alter, so it could be seen as Mikoto trying to hide those urges as well.

“’I’ will save ‘me’”- this is a very interesting line that I think very well encapsulates the shadow alter’s initial motives; he’s saying “hey, I’m going to take care of us,” I believe to try and convince softboy Mikoto to let him out. As far as if softboy Mikoto can actually “let” him out is TOTALLY up for debate.

Part of the reason I refer to the other alter as softboy Mikoto is because there are softer words I notice used by him in the song; here’s I’m seeing “snuggle”, so I think this side of him is more vulnerable and soft.

SWITCH, shake up that brain- wow couldn’t be any more obvious here

This is where the chorus starts. This I think is from softboy Mikoto’s perspective, PARTICULARLY when he’s trapped in the headspace. There are many forms of plurality IRL in which alters cannot simultaneously front, so one or more are “pushed” back into the headspace. This very act occurs several times throughout the song in the weird minimalist vaporwave shadow realm room, where the tarot cards are. During this time, we can assume that is when the shadow alter is fronting. Softboy Mikoto slowly starts to become more helpless and fearful in this space as the song goes on, and this is where he makes his celtic cross tarot spread that quite frankly defines the whole song. I discussed that in my other post.

Another facet of plurality that is applied here is amnesia, which is common, especially when alters are pushed back to the headspace. Within the headspace, there may be a lack of awareness to the outside world, which Mikoto seems to express in his confused sentiments like the above (in the video, he is also scratching his head, which as a gesture can represent being confused). “Why am I here?” can act as a double entendre, both referring to “Why have I suddenly been pushed to this headspace?” as well as the whole point of Milgram- “Why am I in prison?”. He may not be aware of exactly what he did, hence why he feels it’s a mistake. He may be experiencing amnesia of what his shadow alter is doing, so he doesn’t even know what crime he committed. However, he at least has enough awareness to tell someone else is present in his body doing things, so he begs the viewer “Hey, just watch whatever my body is doing and it’ll all eventually make sense. I don’t have access to this information, but you do.” I thought this was an interesting fourth wall break.

The truth revealing itself could also be the truth coming to light from the particular tarot reading he does in the headspace; note that the cards only seem to be appear in this place and not in the outside world. So softboy Mikoto is trying to figure out what’s going on this way. If he can’t figure it out himself, maybe the cards can give him some direction.

Another duality- “I won’t forgive you if you reveal the truth” vs. “However I know I’m right when I say I’m innocent”. Or he could be right about something else.

I’m wondering if the breaking here is just reflecting the shadow alter or is softboy Mikoto actually wishing he could end the shadow alter. He at least wants things to change; the way things are right now is not something he’s okay with. Though, it sounds like he isn’t getting help with this and has no idea if he can even arrest full control again. It seems at this point, this has been going on for a while so he’s stopped trying.

In the video, the shadow alter is doing a GREAT job hiding the evidence; while of course probably just trying to not get caught, the shadow alter may also be trying to hide his crime from softboy Mikoto so he’s none the wiser.

He’s hoping he can be rid of the shadow alter side, but I think he also is dumping all his difficult feelings onto the shadow alter. Maybe he feels its some sort of release, even if he can’t control it, so he feels a lot of guilt over the shadow alter’s existence, even though that alter is serving a purpose as a conduit for those emotions.

I really really think though that there IS some connection between softboy Mikoto and shadow alter Mikoto. Maybe they are both truly aware of each other, hence the scene where they are viewing each other through the mirror. I think here, softboy Mikoto might be admitting that it feels good to let the shadow alter out, like a hug. The “minus energy” probably refers to the shadow alter.

“Maybe it’s okay that we’re separated like this?” he wonders. There seems to be a sense of feeling alive at least that is conveyed through the shadow alter.

SPLIT IN HALF- yeah, again, pretty encompassing.

In the video, I think this is when we have a switch, as Mikoto’s expression changes in the outside world mirror.

The chorus again, softboy Mikoto is shoved into the vaporwave shadow realm headspace. He’s asking the audience to investigate him here, but I also like to joke that he’s like “uwu look at me I could never harm anybody, pwease let me out”, which may be true only so far as softboy Mikoto is out.

I wonder if in “I will NEVER forgive you if this is happening to me” is directed at the shadow alter instead of the audience? Like softboy Mikoto is saying “I swear to god if you murdered someone im gonna be so pissed, but I also already kinda know it’s happening.” Just another take.

In the video, softboy Mikoto is THROWN into the headspace, where he is gifted with just one hint of what’s going on: The Devil tarot card.

You DARE accuse Miette of murder? Oh! 1000 years jail for Milgram viewer!

Now the vaporwave space starts to turn into a bloody mess; perhaps now softboy Mikoto is starting to put two and two together.

“Hurting it, holding it down, it doesn’t change anything, does it”- I definitely understand this being plural, like if your alters are causing problems, you may try and chastise them, or you may try and lock them away deep inside, but that often doesn’t stop them from existing. It’s really cool how that idea is present here. Like YES that’s how it is quite often. So even if softboy Mikoto TRIES to smother or accuse his shadow alter, that’s not going to change anything.

It being the same anywhere he goes makes me think he’s been putting up with this for a long time, that it’s not about what environment he’s in because his shadow alter is with him everywhere he goes.

“It’s like what’s wrong isn’t wrong”- may be referring to multiple things:

-the shadow alter having a different morality (hence why murder is okay for him, his indulgence in smokes and…redbull/alcohol, etc)

-OR, how softboy Mikoto’s amnesia isn’t letting him understand the full picture so everything is okay when he’s out fronting (shadow alter cleaned the place up and stuff, perhaps hiding all evidence of murder)

-“I’m already the fake one”- a very common sentiment for plural folks, worrying if you as an alter aren’t “the original” or if you’re not actually split and it’s something you’re making up, etc. I think softboy Mikoto is having these feelings. Poor boy, wish we could get you some therapy instead :/ (all of Milgram would be very different if only most of these people could get therapy, let’s be honest)

Now, what’s special here is that BOTH alters are in the headpace, with shadow alter Mikoto looming ominously behind softboy Mikoto.

During this next instrumental, just a side note: we see what’s going on through security footage. The security cameras reflecting a third person perspective is kind of neat in context of pluralism, where someone else fronting can feel like a third person awareness to another alter. I may be thinking too much into this one, but it’s a fun connection.

Another thing many plural folk go through: DISSOCIATION FROM REALITY. Ah yes, my good friend dissociation. Especially like in Mikoto’s case, where the consequences of being split have drastic consequences, he could be running away from the truth which may always be partially concealed to him. Something’s VERY wrong, he knows this for sure, and it may be at this point he really realizes “Oh shit. I just committed murder.” But instead of taking responsibility in any way, he’s trying to imagine that it’s a fabricated reality. I’m not going to say if this makes him bad or not, but it is a known coping mechanism.

I know I mention that the bad habits of smoking and drinking may be the shadow alters habits, but they could also be softboy Mikoto’s own methods of escapism, which definitely fits with the above lyrics. “I need to wake up soon”- but he still realizes that he’s going to have to face the harsh truth of reality soon.

Now this point indicates a marked change in softboy Mikoto and shadow alter Mikoto’s relationship: I believe there may be a time when softboy Mikoto expects to come back out to the front, but now the shadow alter is starting to take over fully and keep softboy Mikoto locked inside. This is supported by the Outcome card in his celtic cross spread being The Devil. Not only does this card have its own meanings, but here it may mean that the more violent side of him takes over.

Again, don’t know if he’s talking to the audience or his shadow alter in never forgiving this outcome. I believe softboy Mikoto does have a clearer morality in that murder is NOT okay, and if he were to fully acknowledge that he as a whole was capable of that, I think he’d break down. So he’s like “it better NOT be true” because he doesn’t know how he’d be able to deal with that.

Interesting in the video is when Mikoto snaps and the headspace turns red again; I would think this is when the shadow alter is entering the scene and taking over. The snap here is symbolic of the switch.

Now presumably softboy Mikoto is like “PWEASE WET ME OUT MISTEW OBAMA”, which, again with the double meaning, can refer to letting him out of the vaporwave shadow realm headspace OR letting him out of prison. Both apply.

“That it’s a lie

That I’m right”- a nice duality here. Mikoto is having difficulty separating the truth from reality.

Also NOW he is forgiving. Forgiveness vs not forgiveness (grudge)

I think it’s gotten so bad that he’s like “okay fine. Fine if I committed murder, fine if you’re accusing me of murder, but please help me understand what’s going on. Let me out”. Maybe he’ll forgive the shadow alter if only he fesses up to the murder.

Of note for the scene however is that shadow alter Mikoto is holding up The Fool card, which represents softboy Mikoto in this case. “I’m right” may be the shadow alter’s sentiment.

-THE CARDS AT THE END-

Then, all the cards show up in more detail, all depicting weapons instead of the standard minor arcana that you might see in your standard Rider Waite tarot deck (which these are based off of). The Wands are baseball bats, the Swords are kitchen knives, the Cups are…poison cans? Acid? The Pentacles are….records but I can see these being rotary saws if you squint. The Wheel of Fortune has car wheels with a snake….GTA time baby (the snake being hidden danger, the devil’s temptation, etc). The chariot is a really weird motorcycle death machine. I was thinking how like, people would drag people along behind them while driving a vehicle as a method of torture so there is that.

Now we see some cards not in the original spread- I think this represents shadow alter Mikoto inserting himself into the headspace and changing things to fit his goals. We see a couple placed in the original spread, but some don’t and are just free-floating, but you’ll see below we have enough context to decipher their meaning.

First, it’s the Page of Pentacles, which has taken over the position of the 7 of swords as the current challenge affecting the issue. This card indicates “Manifestation, financial opportunity, skill development”. I think this means the shadow alter is finally learning to take full control.

Then we see the reverse 2 of swords, which represents “Indecision, confusion, information overload, stalemate”. This could probably represent softboy Mikoto not suddenly understanding why the shadow alter is ALSO in the headspace. Maybe his dual presence in the outside world AND the headspace is indicative of exactly when he learned to take full control. This was NOT in Mikoto’s original spread.

Wheel of Fortune again, which was in the original spread. “Bad luck, negative external forces, out of control”. Yup, that confirms it.

Next, the Five of Swords from the original spread comes up. “Conflict, tension, loss.png, defeat, win at all costs, betrayal”. Softboy Mikoto is now being completely taken over. There is a facedown card on the chair. This might be the one that reads as Death later, so it may be that softboy Mikoto is…KILLED OFF?

Cup of Ace, “Love, compassion, creativity, overwhelming emotion”. I think this one is also meant to represent softboy Mikoto, but it could be that the shadow alter sees it as an act of mercy to take full control for softboy Mikoto. Maybe he feels his alter can’t handle reality and he’s going to take over full time. Or more likely he just has ulterior motives.

Reverse King of Cups. “emotional manipulation, moodiness, volatility”. Softboy Mikoto was lead along, thinking it was okay to leave things to the shadow alter or to exist alongside him. Now we see that isn’t a viable solution.

Reverse Five of Wands. “conflict avoidance, diversity, agreeing to disagree”. I went over this more in the other post.

Chariot is the last one, WHICH ALSO WAS NOT IN THE ORIGINAL SPREAD. “Control, willpower, success, action, determination”. The shadow alter Mikoto has taken full control. Which is very quickly followed by…

Shadow alter Mikoto drawing Death. Also not in the original spread. Perhaps effectively “killing off” softboy Mikoto and betraying him.

Concluding Thoughts.

Now, I understand I do take most of these lyrics from softboy Mikoto’s perspective, but I’m sure there’s a layer of deception added on by his shadow alter. The Challenge card of the 7 of swords did represent betrayal. So softboy Mikoto’s only context into what’s going on outside may be his headspace tarot reading. If you want to question some of the lyrics, or even think one of the alters is lying, that would add SO much to the complexity of the situation, and I wouldn’t put it past the Milgram team to add something like that.

Common Themes/Symbols:

The mirror, both in the headspace and in the outside world bathroom

The Hanged Man- in a painting in the headspace and on Mikoto’s shirt. Indicative of being wrongly accused or martyred. Softboy Mikoto is likely represented with this, as well as The Fool. The Fool painting probably is there to show that he doesn’t know any better, that he is without the knowledge of what his shadow alter is doing (or doesn’t believe he’s doing anything wrong)

The Half Moon- a light side and a dark side. Pretty self-explanatory. Symbolically, it can also represent life and death. NICE.

Sorry if the conclusions end up being kind of vague. That’s the way a lot of this video is; what’s really going on, as it usually is, is up to viewer interpretation at this stage. I was just hoping to provide a bit of context into the images in the video, plural life, and narrator interpretation. I just really love this video and after this full analysis hope others can at least appreciate the work that went into it.

#milgram #MeMe (milgram)#mikoto kayano #kayano mikoto

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