#shitty way to start the new year
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kilisworld · 1 year ago
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I have been without internet for over a week and am so fucking restless right now. It's insane.
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ulteri0rm0tives · 1 month ago
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It's actually so heartbreaking that in the temperance ending Johnny just.. leaves. Gets all these calls, maybe even texts, from people who don't know the extent of what happened. Who are accusing him, that are mad at him. Especially in the frame of reference that this was V's last wish. That it was V who gave the body up. That it was V who wanted this, wanted to save Johnny, Johnny essentially powerless to stop them ('just scared for ya').
And the thing is.. Johnny just lets everyone. Lets them make their own conclusions, lets them be mad at him. Lets them blame him. Lets them think, that after the love of his life the person who's ever wholly understood or cared about him the most like no other ever could had 'died', that it's his fault, that he could do that to them... Or just lets them think the worst of V as their final lasting impression or mark on this world. Doesn't try to defend himself nor V. He just leaves. Just takes it.
And you would think. You would think the one he would at least tell is Kerry. That the one to actually understand the most would be Kerry. I don't think any of the other love interests could get the whole engram situation like him, they don't have that personal history or connection to the code on the relic like he did after all. Kerry knew Johnny. Enough at least. But Johnny doesn't tell him, and Kerry just thinks V ghosted off on him and Johnny just lets him think that. And it just makes you wonder.. why would Johnny do that? Why would he do any of this?
#is this his way of grieving too? what is he getting out of this? does he want anything out if it? is this what he wants? was this?#wish i could say something more profound about it#but i literally woke in a cold sweat thinking about it 💀 and just needed to get this out#this is also obvi under the scenario of high affinity + v giving the body up willing for johnny + silverv (bc i said so)#(UGH and the way that it can always be argued that V giving up the body willing is just the engram doing its job#rewriting enough of their consciousness. far enough in the convergence. to influence them that this is what they wanted.#and YOU KNOW johnnys torturing himself over that the next few months in that shitty apartment holed up#and grieving in a life and world that has changed so much in the years he was gone with no remnant nothing of his previous life#no support system no friends no V#just him and the ghost he carries the face of and the impression theyre not really gone that they're still there)#((the horror of your life revolving around the tragedy of a loss of autonomy so great it creates an obsessiveness that gets you killed#just for someone to 'willingly' give up their autonomy to save your life.#your life (the fresh start of a new one at that) yet again hallmarked by a loss of autonomy so great it is unquantifiable#things coming full circle. the tail end eaten by the other.#the kind of grief that spurs from a debt so unpayable. so big.#the grief and horror and tragedy of being saved by the thing that killed you the first time around.))#(((ANGUISH)))#it makes me SICK thinking about these two in literally any capacity#they could be in the most dullest archetypal domestic ass conventional relationships n ill still find reasons to make myself sick over them#silverv#cyberpunk 2077#johnny silverhand#v cyberpunk#masc v#fem v#female v#male v#nonbinary v#kerry eurodyne#ult speaking
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al-luviec · 5 months ago
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Here is lady pics from when I was MIA
#alek insanity#using this time to rant about my personal life. my dad had a medical emergency but he should be coming home soon#i spent a while at my aunts house it was fun they have a cat named harold hes so fatness#my stepmom has been staying with my dad up there and magically our heater broke#the hvac guys came (like 10 minutes ago) but they cant really fix it it just needs 2 be replaced atp.#and its been getting below freezing these past few days behhh#but its all good bc im gonna get popeyes soon#doodle (the lady) is sitting on my as i type this#and i decided to start drawing everyday !!! around 2 hours at a time is my goal. i used to draw until id get numbness in my arms#carpal tunnel speedrun? but ive realized its best for my joints if i draw for 1-2 hours. also if i draw everyday im more motivated#ive been trying to pace more too. i used to get 10k + steps a day but kinda. stopped doing that. oopsieeee. just aiming for better habits#fixed my sleep schedule too behhh#my friend has a christmas party on the 21st so im excited 4 that. also christmas in general bc im gonna get a new laptop#mine barely works and is held together with duct tape 😭 and im gonna get a ton of money#my friend is planning a h×h zine so thats exciting + there's a lot of ninjag0 ones around the corner. big things brewing#i think next year will be a good year. this year kinda... started off really shitty#hoping to get my drivers liscense next year. ive been studying for my permit but stuff keeps getting in the way#Also im gonna get new glasses soon after TWO YEARS hfgdhd . idk the future looks bright yall#and i got this fatness woman on me rn so happy times now too#shes trying to sleep on my leg . but ... i have to eat food ... doodleee lady
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icewindandboringhorror · 1 year ago
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examining a seemingly normal image only to slowly realize the clear signs of AI generated art.... i know what you are... you cannot hide your true nature from me... go back where you came from... out of my sight with haste, wretched and vile husk
#BEGONE!!! *wizard beam blast leaving a black smoking crater in the middle of the tumblr dashboard*#I think another downside to everyone doing everything on phone apps on shitty tiny screens nowadays is the inability to really see details#of an image and thus its easier to share BLATANTLY fake things like.. even 'good' ai art has pretty obvious tells at this point#but especially MOST of it is not even 'good' and will have details that are clearly off or lines that dont make sense/uneven (like the imag#of a house interior and in the corner there's a cabinet and it has handles as if it has doors that open but there#are no actual doors visible. or both handles are slightly different shapes. So much stuff that looks 'normal' at first glance#but then you can clearly tell it's just added details with no intention or thought behind it. a pattern that starts and then just abruptly#doesn't go anywhere. etc. etc. )#the same thing with how YEARS ago when I followed more fashion type blogs on tumblr and 'colored hair' was a cool ''''New Thing''' instead#of being the norm now basically. and people would share photos of like ombre hair designs and stuff that were CLEARLY photoshop like#you could LITERally see the coloring outside of the lines. blurs of color that extend past the hair line to the rest of the image#or etc. But people would just share them regardless and comment like 'omg i wish I could do this to my hair!' or 'hair goallzzzz!! i#wonder what salon they went to !!' which would make me want to scream and correct them everytime ( i did not lol)#hhhhhhggh... literally view the image on anything close to a full sized screen and You Will SEe#I don't know why it's such a pet peeve of mine. I think just as always I'm obsessed with the reality and truth of things. most of the thing#that annoy me most about people are situations in which people are misinterpreting/misunderstanding how something works or having a misconc#eption about somehting thats easily provable as false or etc. etc. Even if it's harmless for some random woman on facebook to believe that#this AI generated image of a cat shaped coffee machine is actually a real product she could buy somewhere ... I still urgently#wish I could be like 'IT IS ALL AN ILLUSION. YOU SEE???? ITS NOT REALL!!!!! AAAAA' hjhjnj#Like those AI shoes that went around for a while with 1000000s of comments like 'omg LOVE these where can i get them!?' and it's like YOU#CANT!!! YOU CANT GET THEM!!! THEY DONT EXIST!!! THE EYELETS DONT EVEN LINE UP THE SHOES DONT EVEN#MATCH THE PATTERNS ARE GIBBERISH!! HOW CAN YOU NOT SEE THEY ARE NOT REAL!??!!' *sobbing in the rain like in some drama movie*#Sorry I'm a pedantic hater who loves truth and accuracy of interpretation and collecting information lol#I think moreso the lacking of context? Like for example I find the enneagram interesting but I nearly ALWAYS preface any talking about it#with ''and I know this is not scientifically accurate it's just an interesting system humans invented to classify ourselve and our traits#and I find it sociologically fascinating the same way I find religion fascinating'. If someone presented personality typing information wit#out that sort of context or was purporting that enneagram types are like 100% solid scientific truth and people should be classified by the#unquestionaingly in daily life or something then.. yeah fuck that. If these images had like disclaimers BIG in the image description somewh#re like 'this is not a real thing it's just an AI generated image I made up' then fine. I still largely disagree with the ethics behind AI#art but at least it's informed. It's the fact that people just post images w/o context or beleive a falsehood about it.. then its aAAAAAA
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bogos--binted · 5 months ago
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can someone please tell me what yhe fuck my mothers problem is
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toxooz · 1 year ago
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i Need to take up embroidery now rIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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sadgirlautumn · 1 month ago
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went through that switch 2 posts tags (which was a bad idea) because i really hate people’s holier than thou attitude when they say “i don’t get why people still care about video game consoles when they could just get a gaming pc or laptop” as if the lowest price (which is NOT recommended) isn’t $500 which is on par with the switch 2. even if you were to pirate all the games on your pc you’d still have to buy some more things (keyboard, mouse, headphones, monitor, etc depending on what you’re getting into) to go with your pc. plus you have to have space in your place for a desk and chair which can also cost a lot of money if you don’t search around for ones second hand.
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hello-zephyr · 4 months ago
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kushamisaru · 5 months ago
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When I get over my yucky feelings for the pair Drew and Willow are so funny because it's like, predicated on the notion that Drew was the big hero in her cancer storyline when I barely remember the role he played in it. Wasn't he off on some wild goose chase or something? Liesel is and always has been the hero of that story to me since she ended up being her donor.
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im2tired4usernames · 1 year ago
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Ugh I was excited for today until I found out I'd have to spend it with people that actively make me hate being alive hate the future and drain me off all energy physically mentally spiritually like a vampire I can't stand to be around her she is the definition of stupidity and even then that's generous as fuck this bitch has filled her brain with so much garbage I watch her brain cells die at alarming rates every single time she uses her vocal cords her giggles make me want to jam a sewing needle into my ear repeatedly so I can never have to hear it again its a friendly reminder that my parents decisions this time my dad's constantly makes me want to die
#i cant even shes just so dangerously stupid#she thinks energy drinks with natural caffeine are safe to give people who have been told by doctor doing take caffeine with thia meds#ahe thinks of a child is CHOCKING to lie them face down n rub their back#she has the evangelical woman voice worse then women I've met n that cult ahe giggles constantly and behaves like the stereotype lil german#boy just got a lollipop over.... everyone and everything whe acts likw an 11 year old I just got the first boyfriend and all they could talk#is how perfect their boyfriend is and they're so pretty good for that I pulled a boyfriend is and it's like a God thing that they met how#SOOOOOOOOOO in love while constantly nonstop touching ahe has to be touching him her hand on his thigh her atm linked with his her heaf on#his chest she has to be in her lap they make out all over the place IT'S DISGUSTING AND EMBARRASSING STOP SWAPPING SPIT#she started a i. hwr words 'love diary of their love journey' they hadn't been dateing 2 months her kids are spoiled fake Instagram bitches#with such shitty views on politics SHE'S A TRUMP FAN GIRL SHENLOVES TRUMP MY DAD BROUGHT IN A TRUMPIE#there's so much i cant even say because even admitting it on tumblr is too embarrassing i wanted.to.likw her i liked her the first day but#THE MORE I GET TO KNOW GET THE MORE N MORE N MISS RED FKAGS#she threw away all my siblings clothes school books toys uniforms for sports their in toys i bought them that week make up jewelry#in the disguise of helping clean house#while i was at the hospital the kids call me in tears i call her beg her to wait and nope.ahe didn't i found the bags by the curb i brought#my dad sided with hwr because 'she didn't mean any harm she didn't know sje was throwing them away'#my mom hasn't bsen dead a year he started dating right after ahe died#hes talking about marrying this woman this woman who has never had an honest educated thought once in her life#WHO ASLO SPEMDA MONEY LIKE A DRUNKEN SAILOR AHE CAME FROM A WITCH FAMILY HER LAST TWO HUSBANDA WERE TOUCH SHE HAS NO KNOWLEDGE OF THE COMMON#SHE SPENDS LIKE SHE STILL HAS MONEY WHEN SHE DOSE NOT AND IT'S LIKE YOU DID NOT JUST SPEND OVER 180 DOLLARS N PASTRIES GOD#SHES SO FUCKIN STUPID AND EVERY HOLIDAY SINCE MY MOM DIED WVERY FAMILY GWT TOGETHER BECAUSE WE DON'T TALK OR.DO ANYTHING WITH MOM'S SIDE#OF THE FAMILY ANYMORE SHE'S THERE EVERY WINGLE MOTHER FUCKIN WEEKEND SHES HERE I'M EXHAUSTED SHES PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY DRAINING TO BE ARO#OUND SHES LIKE IF SOMEONE TOOK A GOLDEN RETRIEVER ON A DIET OF JUST FUCKIN COCAINE LITTLE GERMAN BOY WITH LOLLY AND CRUELLA DEVILLE AND FUSE#THEN TOOK A STRAW AND DRANK ALL THE SMARTS OUT OF THAT BEING#UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGH MY DADS GOIN TO NARRY RHIA BITCH SHES GOIN TO TRY TO BE A MOTHER TO ME AND MY SIBLINGS AND THEY'RE GOIN TO#be so fucked up because her kids are not ok SHE FUCKED THEM OVER BAD SHE HAS FOUR KIDS ALL ADULTS THEY'RE JUST WOW#I HATE MY LIFE I HATE WHAY FUTURE MY FAMILY IS GOIN TO BE THE GOOD THINGS IS I WON'T HAVE TO STAY I CAN GO N MAKE A NEW ONE WITH MY WIFE#FOR ME BUT MY SIBLINGS ARE FUCKED AND ANYTIME I WANT TO VISIT MY FAMILY YANDERE GOLDEN RETRIEVER BITCH WILL BE THERE WORMING HWR WAY IN#SHES CONSTANTLY CALLING N TEXTING MY DAD NONSTOP OF SHE'S NOT NEXT TO HIM AND IF HE CAN'T RESPOND INSTANT SHE FREAKS OUT N BUGS ME
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running-in-the-dark · 2 years ago
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the apartment we looked at today was really bad - like, one room was missing half the flooring and they (the landlord) just put carpet over it. luckily it was only the current tenant there, though - she told us about the landlord and that she's... not great. so even if the apartment had been decent we wouldn't have been interested after that.
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natugood · 2 years ago
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I love just sitting and working in small, local coffee shops for hours at a time. Even though it’s hard for me to sit still, it’s really fun to get to see all the people who come in and to get a better sense of the community as a whole. I love half listening to conversations, seeing how people interact with each other and with the baristas, and who even is drawn to the location in the first place. I don’t usually feel like paying $2 - $6 for a coffee or tea is really worth it except on special occasions, but the value of getting to be around people in a pleasant, safe, open environment like that really adds so, so much value to the experience. I like to feel connected to the people around me, so it makes me happy!
#I had to get a new key for my car and my headlight replaced so I walked to a random coffe and boba shop in a shitty looking strip mall#that was about 10 mins away from the car dealership. I was there for 2 hours and two small groups of people came in during that time#first over the first 15-20 mins I was there three or four men in their 30s -50s came in and were talking with the barista#I discovered that the barista (also a 30-50 year old man) and all of the men were part of the local Slavic community#cause they were speaking what I think was russian (I only know how to say yes and no in russian and I heard those words lol)#they talked for about 30ish mins before each man left individually. the shop was empty for about 15 mins before an elderly couple came in#their friend Jim joined them - they seemed to be regulars possibly - and they talked for about 20 mins and were still talking when I left#when I took a phone call it directed to my hearing aides and they thought I was taking to them so after I was done I apologized#they were very nice snd chatted with my briefly about my aides and people thinking I must be talking to myself with them (which DOES happen#but also I do talk to myself out loud all the time lol) and when I left the coffee shop I said bye to the barista and the elderly group#they all said bye back. it was such a pleasant experience#it was also SO different than I expected cause the coffee shop not only does coffee but also does bubble tea and matcha???#so I assumed it would be an Asian owned business not a Russian/Slavic one lol#overall a great experience. 10/10. a wonderful way to start the morning#googoogajoob
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becca4leafclover · 2 years ago
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JUSTICE PREVAILS THE GREEDY OLD MAN RUINING MY SCHOOL HAD 800-100 VOTE OF NO CONFIDENCE AGAINST HIM!! HIS REPUTATION IS SHATTERED GET HIM OUTTA HEREEEE
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swankpalanquin · 3 months ago
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did nothing yesterday so i do need to do some actual cleaning today and also plan out the rest of my life
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deathisamotherofbeauty · 4 months ago
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nawt the one tooth I had gotten fixed one year ago suddenly loosing some of the material that went over the cavity hole or whatever
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gregmarriage · 5 months ago
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the strugglerrrrrrrrr
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